WEBVTT - "Birth Care For Number Twos" 0:00:00.040 --> 0:00:01.800 Life from the Export, Beer Gut and Studio and brought 0:00:01.800 --> 0:00:03.840 to you, as always by Expert Ultra, which is the 0:00:03.880 --> 0:00:06.280 bear for here. This is the Agenda Podcast for Wednesday, 0:00:06.320 --> 0:00:07.280 the fourth of December. 0:00:08.480 --> 0:00:12.719 The Agenda Podcast, the home of Sporting Nonsense and clap Trap, 0:00:13.160 --> 0:00:15.080 brought to you by Export Ultra. 0:00:15.960 --> 0:00:18.000 Good morning, Julane, and a very good morning to Matt Heath. 0:00:18.360 --> 0:00:20.160 Kid. Hey guys morning. 0:00:20.200 --> 0:00:22.040 I'd like to start with an apology to you, Matt Heath. 0:00:22.680 --> 0:00:24.640 What'd you do this time last night? 0:00:25.760 --> 0:00:29.120 Last night we filmed it was like a bonus episode 0:00:29.120 --> 0:00:33.720 of Game of Two Halves. They said, we need someone 0:00:34.720 --> 0:00:36.320 for the buzz, the burner around. 0:00:36.440 --> 0:00:38.199 Yes, I've been involved in that. I've been I've been 0:00:38.240 --> 0:00:39.000 humiliated on it. 0:00:39.080 --> 0:00:42.159 A little bit of a spoiler. But we had so 0:00:42.200 --> 0:00:43.640 I rung Heath. 0:00:43.920 --> 0:00:47.720 We had a technical meltdown, which meant your you could 0:00:47.720 --> 0:00:51.640 hear the studio, right, yeah, but the studio couldn't hear you, right. 0:00:51.880 --> 0:00:55.520 And so what happened was basically you rung and were 0:00:55.560 --> 0:00:58.880 panned for about two minutes and then hung up on. 0:01:00.320 --> 0:01:02.000 It was like Laura was telling me that I that 0:01:02.040 --> 0:01:03.680 I didn't know what I was doing. I was like, look, 0:01:03.680 --> 0:01:05.080 I'm just trying to do I'm not getting any money 0:01:05.120 --> 0:01:06.720 for this. I'm just trying to help out. I'm getting 0:01:06.720 --> 0:01:11.000 absolutely ripped here. Already I already got fired from the show, 0:01:11.240 --> 0:01:14.520 and now I'm getting ripped. At least you got fired. Yeah, 0:01:14.720 --> 0:01:15.640 well you got canceled from it. 0:01:16.560 --> 0:01:16.840 Fired. 0:01:17.440 --> 0:01:19.520 I was also doing a radio shirt the same time. 0:01:19.560 --> 0:01:22.920 It's been recorded, playing the victim card here a little bit. 0:01:23.680 --> 0:01:25.560 I like to take issue with that whole segment of 0:01:25.680 --> 0:01:26.440 Game of Two Halves. 0:01:26.520 --> 0:01:28.759 Yeah, the burner has it worked well. 0:01:28.800 --> 0:01:31.960 The thing is I was involved in it and they 0:01:31.959 --> 0:01:33.560 didn't know how to hang up on me. So I 0:01:33.600 --> 0:01:36.080 was just hanging around like an old man's nappy. They 0:01:36.120 --> 0:01:38.280 were going just abuse me, get off? Did you like 0:01:38.319 --> 0:01:38.640 get out? 0:01:38.680 --> 0:01:41.360 I'm like that's what I'm still here and they're like, oh, 0:01:41.440 --> 0:01:42.759 how do we hang up? And I was like, well, 0:01:42.760 --> 0:01:43.360 I'm still here. 0:01:43.560 --> 0:01:46.120 Like just you know, when you're ready. 0:01:45.959 --> 0:01:49.760 I've got Violent Christmas starring you know, the guy from 0:01:50.240 --> 0:01:52.360 Stranger Things on pause waiting for the call. 0:01:53.560 --> 0:01:55.320 It's great movie, Violent Night. 0:01:55.400 --> 0:01:57.680 Have you seen it? No, It's a sort of die 0:01:57.680 --> 0:02:01.040 Hard meets Santa Claus and there's and it turns out 0:02:01.040 --> 0:02:03.320 that Sanacals is this sold Viking guy, but he's become 0:02:03.320 --> 0:02:06.000 an alcoholic, and he's and and but then he gets 0:02:06.240 --> 0:02:09.680 he gets sort of stuck in this house with these 0:02:10.160 --> 0:02:13.000 people that are getting attacked by terrorists, and so Santa 0:02:13.040 --> 0:02:15.160 Claus just goes around. David Harbor I think his name is, 0:02:15.400 --> 0:02:19.120 just goes around. It absolutely kills people that really fucking violent. 0:02:19.120 --> 0:02:21.480 He's got the sledge hair up proper bed center. Yeah, 0:02:21.480 --> 0:02:24.040 he's he's a good guy though he's it's for the 0:02:24.080 --> 0:02:28.720 right reason. He's protecting this little girl who's who's stuck 0:02:28.760 --> 0:02:29.079 in there. 0:02:29.320 --> 0:02:32.480 But it's very, very very funny. So you've got the 0:02:32.520 --> 0:02:35.239 screen pause. He's got a sledge hammer paused over someone's ears. 0:02:35.240 --> 0:02:36.680 I get the text from you to ring, I rang, 0:02:36.800 --> 0:02:39.360 and just get a flurry of abuse from Laura mcgoldbratt. 0:02:39.639 --> 0:02:44.080 And then I'm like, well it was no good. Turn goes. 0:02:46.320 --> 0:02:50.960 Right. I'll go back to my movie. 0:02:51.200 --> 0:02:54.440 It's a killer that kills me. It's not a spoiler, 0:02:54.440 --> 0:02:56.160 because you know he still I don't know who's going 0:02:56.200 --> 0:02:59.840 to win that. I actually don't think that is twenty December. 0:03:00.360 --> 0:03:05.000 All right, Okay, well, so just don't write, don't write 0:03:05.000 --> 0:03:06.400 that down, and don't see the calendar. 0:03:06.440 --> 0:03:09.640 I might invite to remind yourself that shows. 0:03:09.880 --> 0:03:12.280 You might end up on the cameroon floor anyway, So. 0:03:12.240 --> 0:03:14.320 Imagine I'll be you end up getting abused, abused. 0:03:14.440 --> 0:03:15.680 Okay, that's always good content. 0:03:15.880 --> 0:03:19.120 A couple of layers of complexity because they're actually running 0:03:19.160 --> 0:03:21.840 in it's an actual phone. It's not like some sort 0:03:21.880 --> 0:03:24.600 of computer system. It's a genuinely a Samsung phone that 0:03:24.639 --> 0:03:26.600 Laura McGoldrick has to operate and she doesn't know how 0:03:26.639 --> 0:03:30.480 to use it, right she Yeah, so there's so there's that. 0:03:30.600 --> 0:03:33.560 Then it's also how hard does it time through a phone? Oh, 0:03:33.680 --> 0:03:36.240 you'd be surprised, you'd be surprised you can't. And then 0:03:36.240 --> 0:03:38.760 she turns the screen off, but it's still ringing and then. 0:03:38.720 --> 0:03:40.520 It's going to have a bocket again. Yeah, that's why 0:03:40.560 --> 0:03:43.040 she couldn't hang up on you. There was Chris Key 0:03:43.040 --> 0:03:45.080 that couldn't hang up on that. Well, she if she 0:03:45.200 --> 0:03:46.880 knew that she didn't know after the phone, then it 0:03:46.920 --> 0:03:49.320 was unnecessary for it immediately going to abuse me for 0:03:49.400 --> 0:03:52.480 not knowing how to operate my iPhone that I operate 0:03:52.520 --> 0:03:54.840 every day, no problems at all. Yeah, there's a lot 0:03:54.840 --> 0:04:00.840 of blame man flung around. I mean it doesn't matter 0:04:02.240 --> 0:04:05.040 what's firing up ZIBB this week? What was I talking 0:04:05.040 --> 0:04:08.040 about yesterday? There was there was a good chat CRL 0:04:08.160 --> 0:04:13.560 CRL rail links not the cr rail lenk No, God, 0:04:13.600 --> 0:04:15.960 I can't even know what I was talking about. I 0:04:16.000 --> 0:04:18.760 was talking about these these watches here O heart rate monitors. Yeah, 0:04:18.760 --> 0:04:20.840 heart much because some doctors have come out and said 0:04:20.839 --> 0:04:24.480 that they hate heart rate monitors and people monitoring their 0:04:24.480 --> 0:04:26.880 own health because it's creating hypochondriacs. 0:04:27.600 --> 0:04:28.680 Oh yeah, And I. 0:04:28.600 --> 0:04:32.120 Was like, yeah, but if your heart beat suddenly beating 0:04:32.160 --> 0:04:33.880 at one eighty, you do want to know about it. 0:04:34.040 --> 0:04:36.360 And you're just sitting on the couch watching Violent Night 0:04:36.480 --> 0:04:39.119 or something, and it's not just that you've been abused 0:04:39.120 --> 0:04:42.240 by Laura A. Goldrick down the phone line. You might 0:04:42.279 --> 0:04:43.960 need to go to the hospital. So do you monitor you? 0:04:43.960 --> 0:04:45.400 Its quite a bit because you've got a little smart 0:04:45.400 --> 0:04:46.080 watch there. 0:04:46.240 --> 0:04:48.200 A little but I just mainly monitored the little bunny 0:04:48.200 --> 0:04:49.560 on it. It looks at me that was the money. 0:04:49.600 --> 0:04:51.720 Do you feed that there? You feed that money? Give 0:04:51.760 --> 0:04:52.960 it at the chickens. 0:04:53.320 --> 0:04:54.880 What's your heart rate right now? Yeah? 0:04:55.800 --> 0:04:57.359 Are you able to check that? You'll check that for 0:04:57.440 --> 0:04:59.880 you guys, or just what's a normal. 0:04:59.600 --> 0:05:01.240 Heart rate range? We'll see. 0:05:01.240 --> 0:05:04.159 This is all these information that came in seventy and 0:05:04.240 --> 0:05:05.000 ninety or something. 0:05:05.400 --> 0:05:08.240 Is it you can mock out If it's too low 0:05:08.440 --> 0:05:10.840 and you're not an athlete, you've got issues, you. 0:05:10.800 --> 0:05:12.359 Can monitor all you're right. But if you don't know 0:05:12.360 --> 0:05:14.120 what the information is telling you that it's right, you 0:05:15.360 --> 0:05:15.880 can do an e C. 0:05:16.680 --> 0:05:19.520 Fifty sixty is probably resting fifty sixty? 0:05:19.640 --> 0:05:19.920 Is it? 0:05:20.040 --> 0:05:23.400 Okay for a minute, Yeah, whether I go amout sixty five? 0:05:23.720 --> 0:05:25.320 Yeah, okay, so bit high. 0:05:25.080 --> 0:05:29.840 But yeah, but yeah, yeah, I am. You're engaged. I'm 0:05:29.880 --> 0:05:33.080 in New Zealand's top sporting podcast. I've got to have 0:05:33.279 --> 0:05:35.120 a level of you know, do you mind? 0:05:35.440 --> 0:05:37.200 Do you monitor it any other times, like when you're 0:05:37.360 --> 0:05:40.760 taking a dump or maybe making furious love? Do you 0:05:40.760 --> 0:05:42.600 look down you're furiously making love? 0:05:42.640 --> 0:05:43.160 Do you look down? 0:05:43.320 --> 0:05:45.679 Why haven't I been doing that? I don't know. I reckon. 0:05:45.760 --> 0:05:47.640 My heartbeat is at the highest when I'm taking a 0:05:47.680 --> 0:05:50.760 dump at the moment because I had some quite bad 0:05:50.839 --> 0:05:56.880 constipation issues. It's gonna get around one. You get an 0:05:56.920 --> 0:06:02.200 anaerobic workout every time you do. Yeah, it's the it's 0:06:02.279 --> 0:06:05.240 the egg and you know it's the boiled egg and 0:06:05.600 --> 0:06:07.640 spinach what blocks you up. 0:06:07.720 --> 0:06:09.400 Boileding and cheese dyed. Gross. 0:06:09.520 --> 0:06:11.520 So the boiling and cheese dye just to block you up. 0:06:11.560 --> 0:06:12.920 So galler. 0:06:14.200 --> 0:06:15.040 It's not a diet. 0:06:15.120 --> 0:06:18.200 Is it a diet? I'm suggesting it is. 0:06:18.520 --> 0:06:21.400 Okay, So the idea is that you eat nothing but 0:06:21.400 --> 0:06:23.760 boiled eggs and cheese, so you get blocked up, and 0:06:23.760 --> 0:06:26.440 then you get your anaerobic exercise and trying to get 0:06:26.440 --> 0:06:27.279 it out the other end. 0:06:27.440 --> 0:06:28.800 A high protein diet will do that. 0:06:28.880 --> 0:06:32.080 Yeah, well, but you're running the hemorrhoid gauntlet thought. Yeah, 0:06:32.400 --> 0:06:36.320 so it's blowing out your hemorrhoids. That's a real trade 0:06:36.360 --> 0:06:40.120 off moment. That's why you have to get a trainer 0:06:40.120 --> 0:06:43.920 in the bathroom with you. 0:06:42.520 --> 0:06:43.159 When you're doing this. 0:06:43.520 --> 0:06:46.240 You've got to get your rate between nineteen hundred. 0:06:46.240 --> 0:06:49.720 Don't blow it out. Yeah, that's the idea. Back a 0:06:49.720 --> 0:06:51.640 little bit, Ease back a little you're gonna get roids. 0:06:51.680 --> 0:06:55.320 Would you take one single hemorrhoid to drop five killos? 0:06:55.360 --> 0:06:58.520 Right now? How are you to if I could make 0:06:58.520 --> 0:07:01.560 that pack to the devil five gp hemorrhoid, I go 0:07:01.640 --> 0:07:04.680 three hemorrhoids just like that, right now, straight away, I'm 0:07:04.680 --> 0:07:07.000 supposed to be you've had hemorrhoids without the way. 0:07:07.440 --> 0:07:10.680 Okay, how about then? How about three gallstones? How about 0:07:10.680 --> 0:07:12.040 a golstone per five cages? 0:07:12.200 --> 0:07:13.920 What's involved in a gulstone? Is that one of the 0:07:13.960 --> 0:07:14.840 ones you have to piss out? 0:07:14.880 --> 0:07:16.440 You you don't have to piss it out, but I 0:07:16.440 --> 0:07:19.720 mean some people do pass them. Yeah, my spooch had 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:22.600 that and it was the most painful thing. They or 0:07:22.640 --> 0:07:24.000 they laser them, they stick it. 0:07:24.040 --> 0:07:26.560 But is it painful then two hundred trips to the 0:07:26.600 --> 0:07:28.080 gym and eating? 0:07:28.120 --> 0:07:28.280 Right? 0:07:29.160 --> 0:07:31.840 No? No, definitely have you person? 0:07:32.080 --> 0:07:32.640 No, I haven't. 0:07:32.920 --> 0:07:34.640 I've known some people who have, and they said it 0:07:34.680 --> 0:07:36.960 is potentially the most painful thing they ever had. 0:07:37.160 --> 0:07:39.640 No paying, no game. So what are you offering five 0:07:39.720 --> 0:07:43.960 kilos for a gullstone? How much about loss? You offering me? Ah? 0:07:44.280 --> 0:07:45.800 Will you give me ten? Yep? 0:07:45.840 --> 0:07:47.720 I take it for ten, but there needs to be 0:07:47.720 --> 0:07:48.640 the size of a marble. 0:07:49.720 --> 0:07:56.040 No. Have you read much about quantum quantum data storage? No? 0:07:56.640 --> 0:07:57.320 I sure haven't. 0:07:58.480 --> 0:08:00.920 I mean I can't just looking looking ways of storing 0:08:01.040 --> 0:08:05.400 information and rendering and essentially like this is making it 0:08:05.440 --> 0:08:08.320 less complex. Another dimension? Let me go, if you could 0:08:08.360 --> 0:08:12.520 just have your dimension yeah, I want to unload it 0:08:12.520 --> 0:08:14.960 on another version of myself and another dimension. There to 0:08:15.040 --> 0:08:16.760 be quite good quantum fat storage. 0:08:17.000 --> 0:08:18.160 Quantum fat storage. 0:08:18.320 --> 0:08:22.440 So mania and the green mania on Earth three six five. 0:08:23.640 --> 0:08:26.160 Hang on a minute, am I someone else's quantum fat storage? 0:08:27.440 --> 0:08:31.920 What's happening? Somewhere out there is a rip ripped and 0:08:32.280 --> 0:08:34.520 a ripped mad heat that they're just going I just 0:08:34.520 --> 0:08:35.320 can't put the weight on. 0:08:35.880 --> 0:08:36.880 I can't put it on. 0:08:37.280 --> 0:08:40.400 Turns that you've got quantum fat storage in this particular dementia. 0:08:40.480 --> 0:08:43.080 I'm over here busting my and no results. Yeah, I 0:08:43.080 --> 0:08:45.000 mean drinking quite a bit as well. So somewhere there's 0:08:45.000 --> 0:08:46.120 a fat Andrew Dickens. 0:08:48.360 --> 0:08:51.200 Andrew Dickens is gonna be huge, huge. 0:08:51.920 --> 0:08:56.560 There's a Jack Jerry Browny out there. I like the 0:08:56.960 --> 0:08:58.719 I had one of those Apple Watches for a while. 0:08:58.800 --> 0:09:01.360 I was running the old Apple Watch, but I had 0:09:01.360 --> 0:09:02.839 to get rid of it because there's just another thing 0:09:02.880 --> 0:09:04.720 that wants your attention. It's like you get a text 0:09:04.720 --> 0:09:06.800 and all of a sudden, your phone goes, your lapsop goes. 0:09:06.920 --> 0:09:08.520 The fucking light stuff blinking in the. 0:09:08.559 --> 0:09:10.119 Disaster when you're trying to broadcast. 0:09:10.440 --> 0:09:12.160 Yeah, yeah, yeah, because you can't you can't turn all 0:09:12.200 --> 0:09:14.520 of it off, and it's a stress meta, but it 0:09:14.559 --> 0:09:16.839 would give you the little notifications because it would miss 0:09:16.880 --> 0:09:19.280 your steps and all that. Yeah, it'd be like you'd 0:09:19.280 --> 0:09:21.760 close your exercise ring. Yeah. 0:09:21.800 --> 0:09:24.559 And the only time I ever closed the exercise ring, genuinely, 0:09:24.600 --> 0:09:27.240 I was lifting up a beer bottle and it was like, congratulations, 0:09:27.280 --> 0:09:30.600 You've just done your exercise of the day. There's another 0:09:30.640 --> 0:09:35.199 one that they give you, like mindfulness. It's like, go 0:09:35.240 --> 0:09:37.480 and take five deep breaths or even and you breathe 0:09:37.440 --> 0:09:39.960 along with it. Yeah, breath along with it. I did that. 0:09:40.960 --> 0:09:43.680 It's a great work. You know, you've done five minutes 0:09:43.679 --> 0:09:44.280 of breathing whatever. 0:09:44.320 --> 0:09:48.680 I was having a darry and it recorded there, just 0:09:48.720 --> 0:09:50.800 blowing it right back into the face of the watch. 0:09:51.000 --> 0:09:54.080 I'll tell you what. Closing your rings, well, your exercise 0:09:54.160 --> 0:09:56.680 rings would be a good name for that. Che building 0:09:56.720 --> 0:09:59.959 and cheese style talking. Before there'd be the exercise ring. Die, 0:10:00.360 --> 0:10:05.240 open your ring, open your ring, open your exercise ring, 0:10:05.640 --> 0:10:10.439 all right. Dumper size, Yeah, let's consta size. 0:10:13.760 --> 0:10:15.439 Because you're going to go to the toilet anywhere. Yeah, 0:10:15.800 --> 0:10:16.679 most well be blocked up. 0:10:18.320 --> 0:10:21.120 Well, that's why all through Asia they have to squat 0:10:21.200 --> 0:10:23.520 that's why they've got such great core strength, right they 0:10:23.520 --> 0:10:25.640 have to they You know, if you're in the toilet 0:10:25.679 --> 0:10:28.200 for twenty minutes, you're squating for two lazy toilets. 0:10:28.200 --> 0:10:30.280 Oh so lazy. We're just sitting down. 0:10:30.320 --> 0:10:32.640 We just squashed there, just squashed our cheek. 0:10:32.679 --> 0:10:34.560 It's hutched over on their phones. 0:10:34.800 --> 0:10:38.200 We gentrified the toilets watching Joe Shaker just put up 0:10:38.240 --> 0:10:41.280 the highest score on defense ever in a game of 0:10:41.320 --> 0:10:45.280 Fantasy football and beat me. See that's that's our problem. Yeah, 0:10:45.400 --> 0:10:47.240 that's right. Oh you could do that squatting though, if 0:10:47.240 --> 0:10:48.320 you had a deep enough squat. 0:10:48.640 --> 0:10:48.840 Yeah. 0:10:49.040 --> 0:10:51.560 But I mean you'd be actually getting healthier by squatting. 0:10:52.080 --> 0:10:53.440 If you're on your phone for as long as I 0:10:53.480 --> 0:10:55.480 am on the toilet and you're squating, yeah, you're actually 0:10:55.520 --> 0:10:58.240 be doing some good o. Your core would be outstanding. Well, 0:10:58.280 --> 0:10:58.920 that's yeah. 0:10:58.960 --> 0:11:01.440 I know some people who have got in fact, Joe Jurry, 0:11:01.520 --> 0:11:03.439 I believe he's probably gonna hate me saying this, but 0:11:03.480 --> 0:11:06.040 I believe he's got the stirrups in the bathroom where 0:11:06.080 --> 0:11:09.440 he can put his feet up on the on like blocks, 0:11:09.440 --> 0:11:12.840 so he's in a squatting position. Well for giving birth 0:11:12.920 --> 0:11:13.760 like a birthing sweet. 0:11:13.840 --> 0:11:16.600 Yeah, because I think it puts you in a more 0:11:16.720 --> 0:11:18.040 ergonomic position. 0:11:19.640 --> 0:11:22.000 I don't know if the stirrups on your back. 0:11:22.240 --> 0:11:23.719 I think he's not in his back, he said. I 0:11:23.760 --> 0:11:25.400 think it's actually more like he got himself on a 0:11:25.440 --> 0:11:29.640 birth care for two days after a ship, gets made 0:11:29.679 --> 0:11:31.400 toasties and gets given milo's. 0:11:32.160 --> 0:11:33.200 We all seen the flowers. 0:11:33.240 --> 0:11:37.000 Oh my god, kJ can stay with him on the 0:11:37.000 --> 0:11:37.520 first night. 0:11:37.760 --> 0:11:45.000 Have you named it yet? Baptized? 0:11:46.480 --> 0:11:48.360 He won't love that, You're right, No, I don't think 0:11:48.360 --> 0:11:49.080 he will love it. 0:11:50.520 --> 0:11:52.040 But you know, he didn't have the birth care with 0:11:52.120 --> 0:11:54.000 him when we were overseas and we were sharing a 0:11:54.080 --> 0:11:56.440 room for about a week. And I've said it before, 0:11:56.480 --> 0:11:58.120 but I walked into the bathroom and I heard the 0:11:58.120 --> 0:11:58.840 toilet whimper. 0:12:00.240 --> 0:12:02.280 Were you rubbing his shoulders or anything? 0:12:03.360 --> 0:12:07.200 Looking on like every new handle play of music, give them. 0:12:07.120 --> 0:12:10.600 Some nitress, every new hotel room which check into you 0:12:10.600 --> 0:12:12.600 can you walk into the bathroom and the toilet bowls 0:12:12.679 --> 0:12:14.000 just cowered in the corner. 0:12:14.800 --> 0:12:17.640 I can't. And that's what's I think it's illegal now 0:12:17.720 --> 0:12:21.360 for Joe Jury and Gelane to share it. Yeah, it 0:12:21.520 --> 0:12:24.719 is all right. Let's take a quick break we'll come 0:12:24.800 --> 0:12:25.160 right back. 0:12:26.640 --> 0:12:30.240 We're talking yesterday about the permutations of the World Test 0:12:30.360 --> 0:12:32.760 Championship Fellas, they've taken a hit. 0:12:32.840 --> 0:12:33.800 The chances of us. 0:12:33.720 --> 0:12:36.520 Winning it, which were already very slim, have just gotten 0:12:36.520 --> 0:12:39.360 so much worse because we got hit docked points for 0:12:39.400 --> 0:12:42.000 a slow over rate in that first game in christ. 0:12:42.040 --> 0:12:44.480 I've I've got to do we care about slow over 0:12:44.600 --> 0:12:45.480 rates and test matches? 0:12:45.800 --> 0:12:48.000 Well, it only went four days, I know, this is 0:12:48.000 --> 0:12:51.880 what and Ben Stokes even put a post out saying 0:12:52.520 --> 0:12:55.400 this test mets was finished with ten hours to spare it. 0:12:55.840 --> 0:12:56.640 Thanks ic C. 0:12:56.960 --> 0:12:57.200 Yeah. 0:12:57.400 --> 0:13:00.840 Like, I think a bigger is that they don't start 0:13:00.840 --> 0:13:03.400 at nine am in the morning. Yeah yeah, I mean 0:13:03.720 --> 0:13:05.720 you're already pissing around to eleven am. I mean the 0:13:05.720 --> 0:13:08.840 working day starts at nine. Yeah, and then we always 0:13:08.840 --> 0:13:10.960 get this problem at the end of the day with light. Yeah, 0:13:11.040 --> 0:13:14.040 it's like sort that problemly out before the slow overrating 0:13:14.080 --> 0:13:15.760 and test matches. I mean, when was the last Test 0:13:15.760 --> 0:13:17.440 match that went to the end of day five? 0:13:18.520 --> 0:13:20.920 Yeah, there was that one against England. We Yeah, it 0:13:20.960 --> 0:13:23.280 doesn't even last, No, it doesn't. I can't remember the 0:13:23.320 --> 0:13:26.360 last time. And if it wasn't affected by weather, yeah, yeah, 0:13:26.480 --> 0:13:28.839 I can understand why they're doing it because obviously. 0:13:29.120 --> 0:13:30.600 I get it into the twenties and I get it 0:13:30.559 --> 0:13:31.160 an odio ice. 0:13:31.240 --> 0:13:34.800 It does need to be a line though, otherwise some 0:13:34.840 --> 0:13:36.600 times will go in bove thirty overs in a day, 0:13:36.640 --> 0:13:39.480 you know what I mean. There needs to be a standard. 0:13:40.080 --> 0:13:42.320 But when a Test match is so advanced like that, 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:44.160 surely there should be. 0:13:44.240 --> 0:13:45.800 It should kick in. I don't know. I don't know 0:13:45.800 --> 0:13:47.240 when we would to kick in. I don't know. 0:13:47.640 --> 0:13:50.360 If the game goes the distance, then you look back 0:13:50.400 --> 0:13:52.240 and reinforce it, like how did we get to this point? 0:13:52.360 --> 0:13:52.720 I think? 0:13:52.920 --> 0:13:56.280 But like like old Stokes said, if it didn't go 0:13:56.360 --> 0:14:00.600 the distance, it shouldn't be enforced. Yeah, because you're right 0:14:00.640 --> 0:14:02.080 about the nine a m. Thing, Because when we flew 0:14:02.080 --> 0:14:03.679 out of christ Church on the day of the Test 0:14:03.679 --> 0:14:07.040 match last week, everyone was queued up about eight o'clock 0:14:07.040 --> 0:14:07.400 in the morning. 0:14:08.120 --> 0:14:10.520 The Hondies where Hondies were there, out and out in force, 0:14:10.880 --> 0:14:13.240 because Test matches is built for cricket hondies. 0:14:13.440 --> 0:14:14.439 Yeah, by heard. 0:14:14.280 --> 0:14:18.120 Outs, they just start at nine. It's crazy start interesting 0:14:18.120 --> 0:14:18.840 part of the ten. 0:14:19.280 --> 0:14:21.080 Yeah, it's eleven. 0:14:21.880 --> 0:14:22.600 What is eleven? 0:14:22.640 --> 0:14:23.760 It's basically lunchtime? 0:14:23.840 --> 0:14:28.400 Yes, and you're starting on brunch and then very soon 0:14:28.520 --> 0:14:29.520 afterwards you have lunch. 0:14:29.600 --> 0:14:31.600 Yeah, and it gets and later in the season, and 0:14:31.600 --> 0:14:33.320 in early seasons it gets quite cold. 0:14:33.480 --> 0:14:35.680 How about we start at how about we start at 0:14:35.680 --> 0:14:38.840 six am and have a breakfast break instead of lunch. Yeah, 0:14:39.200 --> 0:14:43.600 run a twelve hour like mining shift. You do it 0:14:43.640 --> 0:14:47.800 like the Singaporean John to run the works department. Get 0:14:47.840 --> 0:14:51.360 three shifts, three different multiple teams playing three shifts. You get. 0:14:51.400 --> 0:14:52.720 You can get a Test match over in two and 0:14:52.760 --> 0:14:53.440 a half days. 0:14:53.480 --> 0:14:54.480 We could run concurrent. 0:14:54.600 --> 0:14:57.120 You could have a World Test Championship in like a 0:14:57.160 --> 0:14:59.560 month if you play we played for twelve hours in 0:14:59.680 --> 0:15:01.560 the other game place for twelve hours and we come 0:15:01.600 --> 0:15:01.840 back on. 0:15:01.840 --> 0:15:03.760 You've got two Test matches running concurrently. 0:15:03.880 --> 0:15:06.000 I see what you're saying. You could have three. 0:15:05.880 --> 0:15:10.600 Because yeah, eight hours eight hours freaking current. 0:15:10.720 --> 0:15:13.000 So you know, England and New Zealand go off, and 0:15:13.000 --> 0:15:14.920 then Australia and India to come on and use the 0:15:14.960 --> 0:15:19.600 same wicket for eight hours. Yeah, and South Africa come over, 0:15:19.760 --> 0:15:22.400 come on and smash stri Lanka and a massively advanced 0:15:22.400 --> 0:15:25.080 wicket in the early You. 0:15:25.080 --> 0:15:26.440 Don't want to be betting last on that one. 0:15:27.480 --> 0:15:31.760 Could that be coupled a better glass after three Test matches. 0:15:31.800 --> 0:15:34.720 Yeah, it's eight. I can't even know the methods earlier. 0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:37.480 What I don't log about this is they've been fine 0:15:37.520 --> 0:15:40.200 fifteen the match fece. I thought the captain got fired 0:15:40.240 --> 0:15:42.160 for a slow over eight, But I'm reading that that 0:15:42.560 --> 0:15:44.280 looks to me like the whole team got fired. 0:15:44.320 --> 0:15:46.560 Yeah you know, you're. 0:15:46.400 --> 0:15:49.520 Fielding on the fucking boundary, you know, Yeah, yeah, fielding 0:15:49.560 --> 0:15:52.800 down a fine deep, fine leg. You're not bowling. You're 0:15:52.800 --> 0:15:56.960 getting the fifteen percent match, right, It's like, yeah, what 0:15:57.040 --> 0:15:57.760 was I supposed to do? 0:15:58.080 --> 0:16:01.840 Admittedly it was quite slow, like play went to six 0:16:01.920 --> 0:16:05.160 thirty every day, because that's the maximum time. It's either 0:16:05.280 --> 0:16:09.680 ninety overs in the day or six thirty or start earlier. Yeah, yeah, totally, 0:16:09.880 --> 0:16:11.600 And it goes six thirty every time, and that only 0:16:11.640 --> 0:16:13.320 I think the maximum that bowl was like eighty one 0:16:13.360 --> 0:16:13.880 or eighty two. 0:16:14.000 --> 0:16:16.680 So right, Okay, so they were flouting the rules a 0:16:16.720 --> 0:16:17.080 little bit. 0:16:17.160 --> 0:16:19.000 They were a little bit, and but I think they 0:16:19.040 --> 0:16:22.280 all knew that this game was so advanced didn't matter. 0:16:22.480 --> 0:16:24.920 Yeah, But the problem is it depends wildly on what 0:16:25.000 --> 0:16:27.400 kind of wick that you're working on. So if it's 0:16:27.400 --> 0:16:31.240 suddenly incredibly spin friendly. Then you just whiped through the overs, right. 0:16:31.280 --> 0:16:32.720 That's why in India it's I don't think it's really 0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:34.520 an issue sometimes in India, Yeah, because. 0:16:34.840 --> 0:16:37.240 Everyone's got a steam in from the boundary, like in 0:16:37.240 --> 0:16:40.600 New Zealand, especially zeal in England that's the same. It's 0:16:40.600 --> 0:16:42.200 seem as you should be find if they've being left 0:16:42.200 --> 0:16:45.320 handed and right handed batsman as well, havn't just changed 0:16:45.360 --> 0:16:47.720 the field, Yeah, adding too many boundaries. 0:16:47.800 --> 0:16:51.440 Yeah, he's at one hundred and one hundred and thirty 0:16:51.480 --> 0:16:52.320 one sixes in tes. 0:16:52.640 --> 0:16:54.920 He's slowing the plate. Yeah, let's go and get the ball. Yeah, 0:16:54.960 --> 0:16:55.400 that's right. 0:16:55.520 --> 0:16:56.920 It was a man who heard it out of the ground, 0:16:56.960 --> 0:16:58.960 was it, Pope? Yeah, someone hit it literally out of 0:16:59.000 --> 0:17:01.800 the ground. Find them fine, what a fucking delay of 0:17:01.880 --> 0:17:04.480 game that is. There's too many variables just being just 0:17:04.520 --> 0:17:07.720 to field it. And also ferrals, Yeah, the ferals go 0:17:07.800 --> 0:17:12.320 for find them. You can find the find the DRS guy. Yeah, 0:17:12.680 --> 0:17:14.800