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Speaker 1: So the oscars nooms have come out and guess what. Wicked,

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Speaker 1: the musical with Ariana Grande is on the list for

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Speaker 1: Best Picture. It's two hours and forty minutes long. It

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Speaker 1: doesn't have an ending because there's two parts, so you

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Speaker 1: get half a story and it takes half your life

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Speaker 1: to watch. We should not be encouraging this type of

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Speaker 1: time wasting people. Cinemas are not comfortable places. I've got

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Speaker 1: a bad back, I've got a load tolerance for people

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Speaker 1: bursting into song. Sitting in a cinema seat for almost

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Speaker 1: three hours listening to Ariana Grande singing her feelings is like, well,

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Speaker 1: it's like being held in a small torture chamber. In

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Speaker 1: three hours, you can achieve many things. You can fly

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Speaker 1: to Australia, you could run a marathon. Hell, you can

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Speaker 1: even get an operation in three hours. My grandma's knee replacement,

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Speaker 1: she had it done recently, took less than three hours. Actually,

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Speaker 1: I would rather get my knee replaced than listen and

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Speaker 1: watch Wicked, because it's a two parter. You could actually

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Speaker 1: get both knees done. And it's not just Wicked that's

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Speaker 1: dragging on June. Did you see that the sci fi

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Speaker 1: space through approximately six hundred hours in length. And I

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Speaker 1: know what you're thinking. If you don't like a movie, Ryan,

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Speaker 1: just don't go and see it. Ah. I never wanted

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Speaker 1: to see June. My partner did. And as a married man,

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Speaker 1: as you will know, if you're married, some things you

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Speaker 1: do even though you don't want to do. And directors, arrogant,

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Speaker 1: self indulgent Hollywood types don't think about us, do they.

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Speaker 1: They just think about themselves. They just think about this amazing,

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Speaker 1: emotional movie that they've created, inspired piece of art that

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Speaker 1: they'll happily dump on the world's cinemas and expect everybody

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Speaker 1: else to love. The Brutalist that's also on the list

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Speaker 1: three and a half hours long, nominated for Best Picture,

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Speaker 1: Poked Me in the Eyes, brutalist by name and brutalist

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Speaker 1: by nature. I estimate half of cinemas are filled with

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Speaker 1: people who don't want to be there, trapped in their

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Speaker 1: own little torture chambers, battling through musicals and rom comms

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Speaker 1: and war biopics, all for the sake of their marriage

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Speaker 1: or to please a friend. Our attention spans are far

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Speaker 1: too short for this. Now we have TikTok, we have Instagram,

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Speaker 1: We have small brains. We have Twitter. What used to

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Speaker 1: be a novel is now one hundred and forty characters.

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Speaker 1: People abbreviate their speech because we can't be asked with

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Speaker 1: full sentences. For goodness, sex, Hollywood and today's Oscars nods

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Speaker 1: have totally missed the public. Mood I propose a new category,

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Speaker 1: Best Picture in under ninety minutes. For more from the

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Speaker 1: mic Asking Breakfast, listen live to news talks that'd be

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Speaker 1: from six am weekdays, or follow the podcast on iHeartRadio