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Speaker 1: For all you med bastards loving the Big Show podcast,

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Speaker 1: get up even closer on Instagram, YouTube and ticked off

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Speaker 1: for dogging four to seven every weekday on radio.

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Speaker 2: I just had something to say, but then I thought, ship,

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Speaker 2: I can say that for the old show there.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, good stuff.

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Speaker 2: We're going to buy a couch kezy for the podcast studio.

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Speaker 4: And that's good. That's good for the show, is it?

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Speaker 2: Well? The conversation that I have with the dude that

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Speaker 2: I bought the couch off is good for the show, right, Okay,

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Speaker 2: another backbone, another backbone, just spinning the hands. Yeah, it

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Speaker 2: was good, fun.

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Speaker 3: Good stuff. Man, sounds exciting.

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Speaker 5: We'll put that in a six o'clock hour. Yeah, that

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Speaker 5: was where we put our best. Yeah, six to seven,

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Speaker 5: and I'm saying it just goes around the lump lottery.

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Speaker 6: Yes, you know when they you know, listening to the

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Speaker 6: actual live show that we dial out from six to seven.

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Speaker 6: I mean that that would just be a false narrative

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Speaker 6: if anything, we dial in. Yeah, it's like it's almost

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Speaker 6: like it takes us two hours to wake up and

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Speaker 6: then then boom.

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Speaker 4: Comes break boom. What's on the dinner?

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Speaker 6: Yes, but I tell you what fellas my first kind

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Speaker 6: of rainy day in the city, really big city.

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Speaker 1: Lay.

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Speaker 4: I like walking around the city in the ruin, as

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Speaker 4: I've spoken about before.

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Speaker 3: I actually kind of liked it.

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Speaker 1: You know.

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Speaker 3: I'm being in the apartment today. Jeez, I've done some.

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Speaker 6: My wife had an audition this morning. They had a

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Speaker 6: place called catch casting.

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Speaker 3: You know that, magi, Yeah, I do.

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Speaker 6: Which is down what's that road there? But anyway, it's

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Speaker 6: quite quite a good old walk, isn't it. Yeah, great North,

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Speaker 6: thirty minute walk there, thirty minute walk back.

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Speaker 4: Go along as well, just some support.

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Speaker 2: And I just said it quite cute, don't you you

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Speaker 2: two that you would go along for that? Yeah?

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Speaker 7: Well you know, she said, like, can she just go

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Speaker 7: on her own and she wants to go on her

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Speaker 7: own high life?

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Speaker 4: I prefer to look at as cute and shit of

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Speaker 4: fucking needy.

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Speaker 3: Well, here's the thing.

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Speaker 4: Are you a clinger?

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Speaker 3: I used to be.

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Speaker 6: I used to be. Actually I had some issues with that.

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Speaker 6: Yeah I was a bit clinging. Yeah I could see

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Speaker 6: why though. I was a bit of nowhere. Yeah I

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Speaker 6: was a bit needy, but way less now. But no,

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Speaker 6: it was more because at the moment my wife's doing

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Speaker 6: this play.

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Speaker 3: As you both know. I just don't see her at all.

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Speaker 4: You miss it, I miss her, and.

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Speaker 6: I and I go home at night and it's just like,

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Speaker 6: what do I do now? I just sort of sitting

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Speaker 6: there hanging out. She doesn't get back to like eleven.

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Speaker 2: Sort of you're saying, like sometimes two three in the morning, Well, yeah,

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Speaker 2: like just reeking a brute thirty three.

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Speaker 6: That would be an example of it. Back in the day,

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Speaker 6: right when we were early doors and she'd come back

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Speaker 6: late from you, like she did quite a few plays

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Speaker 6: back in the day, and it'd be like, what fucking

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Speaker 6: time is this, Yeah, bloody three hours after the show?

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Speaker 3: What do you be enough to?

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Speaker 2: Actually I had my period of jealousy, yes, but it

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Speaker 2: was a fairly short period and I've never had it before.

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Speaker 2: But I had it. But I didn't say anything about it, right,

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Speaker 2: Okay anything I didn't and my actions there would have

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Speaker 2: been no evidence that I was jealous, yes, because in

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Speaker 2: my head I was just thinking, you're being weak. This

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Speaker 2: is weak behavior, weak thoughts. Just shut up and eventually

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Speaker 2: will get over it. And that's what happened. Yeah, I

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Speaker 2: fucking you see, I one of the lowest forms of

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Speaker 2: It's terrible.

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Speaker 3: It's a terrible, terrible thing.

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Speaker 2: Spral with it, and.

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Speaker 3: You can, you can, And that's what I would do.

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Speaker 2: Everything becomes a reinforcement correct of your incorrect thinking.

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Speaker 6: God, I tell you what fellas. I'm listening to eckhart

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Speaker 6: Toll at the moment the walks he's and that's exactly

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Speaker 6: what he's talking about, your thoughts, telling.

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Speaker 2: You but also making you also the opposite being true.

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Speaker 6: Yes, but I used to get into such a way

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Speaker 6: of thinking about that sort of stuff that I just

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Speaker 6: despised myself. I despised myself in that you know, when

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Speaker 6: you say it out loud and you go, oh, why

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Speaker 6: did you fucking say that?

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Speaker 3: You idiot? Idiot?

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Speaker 2: When it becomes quite clear and I haven't done it, thankfully,

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Speaker 2: but from the response, how wrong you are?

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Speaker 4: Yes, that would suck. I fortunately have never had to.

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Speaker 7: But also there will be situations, situations where there is

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Speaker 7: a reason to be.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, absolutely, oh yeah yeah, when they're like pooking

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Speaker 2: into someone.

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Speaker 4: I hang on a.

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Speaker 2: Minute, is there something going on here?

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Speaker 6: I've had also on the on the flip side, just

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Speaker 6: on that note, had the flip side of that coin,

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Speaker 6: which is my thoughts wore bang on.

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Speaker 2: Yes, and you have also been cheated on and also

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Speaker 2: cheated on people.

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Speaker 7: Correct days from four on Radio Hurarchy with a Wary

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Speaker 7: Big Show podcast.

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Speaker 6: This is all part of like you know, and I

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Speaker 6: own it. Yeah, I'll own it, And boy did I

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Speaker 6: fucking own it?

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Speaker 4: Oil, How did you manage it?

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Speaker 2: How did you? How did you run the operation?

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Speaker 3: Because when someone was unfaithful to me, when I was unfaithful.

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Speaker 2: When you were a SCAMPI.

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Speaker 6: When I was a scamp, big well, you know, I

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Speaker 6: was young and horny and.

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Speaker 4: Steamed, dear, steamed, steamed, definitely.

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Speaker 3: It is a lethal combo. Very poorly.

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Speaker 2: Did you continue it though, because where you're going, I'm

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Speaker 2: just popping out. Get some balancing neck, thank you.

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Speaker 4: I was never going out for a vape.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, not back in those days, but I was never. No,

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Speaker 3: it was never like a and a fear type scenario.

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Speaker 6: Yes, and on one on this particular occasion, that went

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Speaker 6: beyond that because my girlfriend went fuck.

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Speaker 4: You yeahah, right, okay, and then.

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Speaker 3: I went, okay, well I quite like this check so

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Speaker 3: I'm going to carry on.

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Speaker 2: Sweet airs see you later.

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Speaker 6: It wasn't It wasn't quite like that, but you know,

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Speaker 6: but a lot of shame, you know, self discussed again.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, through that you can.

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Speaker 3: And I did, you know what I mean, that's the

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Speaker 3: truth of it.

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Speaker 6: I did.

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Speaker 2: But that's the loop. Yes, that is also the loop.

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Speaker 2: And then you do something else stupid.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, you need to forget your way through that as well.

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Speaker 2: Right. So the drink, well you know what, you're thirty nine.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, so the drink is a way to combat those

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Speaker 7: feelings of self loathing.

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Speaker 6: Yes, right, okay, absolutely, it's an escape. Yeah, it's an

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Speaker 6: escape from your head, temporary reprieve.

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Speaker 2: Yes, but you become a person that you always thought

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Speaker 2: you would be. Yes, for there's a couple of hours

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Speaker 2: in there, you're the you're sort of the print.

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Speaker 6: Correct and you're half done by and if you had

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Speaker 6: my life, you'd do the same thing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Nice.

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Speaker 6: Right.

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Speaker 7: Is there ever a drinking experience where it's just because

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Speaker 7: it's yummy?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I.

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Speaker 6: Mean, as I say, the best beers I ever had

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Speaker 6: will win. My dad was watching the footy on a

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Speaker 6: Sunday afternoon and he let me have a sip of

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Speaker 6: his beer.

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Speaker 3: That was like, that was great.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's good stuff. But that's almost like not even

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Speaker 2: about the beer though, is it. That's about a closeness

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Speaker 2: with your father. Yes, and that's a nice time there.

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Speaker 2: But now I remember those first beers and the taste

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Speaker 2: of them back then, and they don't taste like that anymore,

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Speaker 2: nocause I think I've murdered my taste buds. But the

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Speaker 2: same as cigarettes, the way they tasted the first time

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Speaker 2: you smoke cigarettes.

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Speaker 3: I still the first.

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Speaker 7: Beer I had was fucking horrendous. I had to drink

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Speaker 7: through it. Yes, that's what everybody is to do. I

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Speaker 7: couldn't drink through it, so I had to drink wine.

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Speaker 7: All my mates were drinking beer Jesus, and I was

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Speaker 7: drinking wine because I just couldn't drink I just hated

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Speaker 7: to taste so much.

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Speaker 4: You wear more steam than they were.

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Speaker 2: We were all steamed, power chucking, yes, yeah, but I do.

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Speaker 2: By the end. By the time I was sixteen, I

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Speaker 2: was doing three bottles of wine. Sixteen, Yeah, there shanned

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Speaker 2: on actually the white one, the buy me the pink one.

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Speaker 2: Then you own it.

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Speaker 3: The best time of your life, you know.

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Speaker 6: I still have this really clear vision in my head

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Speaker 6: of going to a party when I was sixteen with

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Speaker 6: all my mates from school around to one of my

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Speaker 6: mate's place in the weekend and his parents were away,

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Speaker 6: and we fucking hoked and we each other no to

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Speaker 6: the booze and the beasies, And I'll never forget like

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Speaker 6: four or five of my mates just chandering at the

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Speaker 6: same time off the Verandah nice, just all because they

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Speaker 6: were steamed and they couldn't handle their past and they

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Speaker 6: just went. Not me, though, I just fucking pounded, and

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Speaker 6: then I had sex with someone one of the boys.

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Speaker 4: I still remember when I was like, probably sixteen, because

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Speaker 4: I'm a fucking well throwing up. I was handling over

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Speaker 4: the bell.

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Speaker 7: I still remember when I was sixteen, might have even

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Speaker 7: mean fifteen or probably not, but I stole some alcohol

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Speaker 7: classic from the loquer cabinet, yes, and I stole Bailey's

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Speaker 7: and Carlor yeah, because I was no, no, just like

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Speaker 7: I remember like my nan giving me a taste of

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Speaker 7: Bailey's and be like, oh yuma, and then I was

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Speaker 7: just like, so you obviously just drink the yummy alcohol.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, And it's.

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Speaker 7: Just like we drank like half of it, were just

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Speaker 7: like chandering so milky into I've.

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Speaker 3: Told you this.

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Speaker 6: Before, you guys, this was fucking legendary at our school.

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Speaker 6: At our school, me and my mate Marty and there

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Speaker 6: was a younger fella who I told you ended up

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Speaker 6: robbing a bank down the line and.

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Speaker 3: He we all got together.

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Speaker 6: It was like eleven o'clock at night, and this particular

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Speaker 6: guy said, hey, why don't I go into Matron's room

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Speaker 6: because she's at massive piss head and steals some of

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Speaker 6: her booze.

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Speaker 3: And we were like, good idea, man, do that.

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Speaker 6: And so he stole this bottle of booze from her

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Speaker 6: drinks cabinet.

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Speaker 2: We went up.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I'll tell you. We went up the mountain. It

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Speaker 3: was a bottle of cream the moth.

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Speaker 4: Oh is this mount Eden?

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Speaker 3: No, it's Mountaint John. I think it's cool.

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Speaker 6: And we were and I had this clear vision we're

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Speaker 6: all sculling from it.

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Speaker 3: It was fucking disgusting. Yeah, it was disgusting.

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Speaker 6: And I had this clear vision of my great mate

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Speaker 6: Marty and the moon was behind him just doing this

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Speaker 6: power chin into the crater in Siloare. And that was

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Speaker 6: and we were like sixteen or seventeen, and we went

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Speaker 6: to class that morning and we were fucking steamed. We

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Speaker 6: were steamed, and we're just sitting in class just going

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Speaker 6: fucking out. I'm really unk, just been feeling cool. Though, Yeah,

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Speaker 6: but it was Cream de Month, which is the fucking

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Speaker 6: most disgusting thing.

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Speaker 3: You will Bailey's as nice.

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Speaker 4: It's like mint. It's like mint.

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Speaker 2: Yes.

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Speaker 7: And then while Marty was checking out with you just

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Speaker 7: having six.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I only even smelled Cream de Month. I

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Speaker 2: ever tasted it.

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Speaker 3: It's it's like a menthole cigarette.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, they still make it mint. Yeah, we should get

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Speaker 7: some gut st John, Yeah we should. It's not being

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Speaker 7: the one spewing Beggs, not being the one Jason is

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Speaker 7: having six with hey. Listen to the Big Show four

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Speaker 7: or seven week days Radio heard