WEBVTT - Sara Chatwin: Leave kids out of politics 0:00:05.761 --> 0:00:38.401 You're listening to the Weekend Collective podcast from News Talk Sedby. 0:00:38.481 --> 0:00:41.121 So welcome back to the Weekend Collective. I'm Tim Beverage 0:00:41.241 --> 0:00:43.961 and this is the Parents Squad. By the way, if 0:00:43.961 --> 0:00:46.881 you miss any of the previous hours fascinating conversation with 0:00:47.161 --> 0:00:49.281 Nick good Or from core Logic just about the softening 0:00:49.321 --> 0:00:51.881 of the market and what's happening and what we might see. 0:00:51.681 --> 0:00:53.721 As a change when it's going to change. 0:00:53.721 --> 0:00:56.161 But you can check out the podcast A week in 0:00:56.201 --> 0:01:00.161 Collective on iHeartRadio, and also a really lively panel with 0:01:00.481 --> 0:01:02.481 Mark Chrysel and Shane to Poe as well, covering a 0:01:02.481 --> 0:01:04.921 bunch of things that he called Harker the pro to 0:01:05.121 --> 0:01:09.481 yes them right down to some slightly more mischievous topics 0:01:09.521 --> 0:01:11.281 shall we say, which I don't need to repeat again, 0:01:11.321 --> 0:01:13.961 but anyway, I check that out we podcast. But right 0:01:13.961 --> 0:01:16.641 now it's time for the Parents Squad and my guest 0:01:16.921 --> 0:01:19.761 is Sarah Chatwin, a psychologist. 0:01:19.801 --> 0:01:21.881 Hello, Sarah, liked it. 0:01:22.321 --> 0:01:24.641 You know, you know it's only because we've had the 0:01:24.681 --> 0:01:27.521 discussions at Sarah or Sarah and then and when my 0:01:27.561 --> 0:01:29.721 mind's racing suddenly it goes. 0:01:29.521 --> 0:01:31.761 All you just go to a bad default. Which one 0:01:31.801 --> 0:01:32.001 was it? 0:01:32.001 --> 0:01:34.081 Now I always have to assume that when the when 0:01:34.081 --> 0:01:37.201 the H is missing, it's Sarah. So anyway, welcome, How 0:01:37.241 --> 0:01:38.241 are you really good? 0:01:38.281 --> 0:01:38.641 How are you? 0:01:38.841 --> 0:01:39.521 I'm not too bad. 0:01:39.841 --> 0:01:40.921 It sounds like the panel was. 0:01:41.001 --> 0:01:45.001 Very you know, liberating and uplifting and energetic. 0:01:45.121 --> 0:01:46.961 If only we could have broadcast the bits that were 0:01:46.961 --> 0:01:50.641 in the ads, that would have been anyway. Hey, you know, look, 0:01:50.721 --> 0:01:54.881 there's a lot of in politics right now. And of 0:01:54.961 --> 0:01:57.001 course we've seen the Hekoy and there was a school 0:01:57.001 --> 0:01:59.681 principal who was encouraging kids to go on up. We've 0:01:59.721 --> 0:02:04.321 seen TV and xetic executives getting a bit of getting 0:02:04.321 --> 0:02:05.881 a bit of heat for going on it and posting 0:02:05.881 --> 0:02:07.521 on their social media. 0:02:07.081 --> 0:02:08.681 But at an early age. 0:02:08.801 --> 0:02:13.801 So obviously parents influence their children because they're their parents. 0:02:14.201 --> 0:02:19.401 But you know, while their frontal lobes are developing, managing 0:02:19.521 --> 0:02:25.121 their political views, encouraging and doctrinating them. You know, there's 0:02:25.841 --> 0:02:30.921 parents who make a point probably of trying to impart 0:02:31.161 --> 0:02:34.321 to their children why their view of the universe and 0:02:34.361 --> 0:02:37.241 the world and politics is the right one? 0:02:38.241 --> 0:02:41.641 Is there? 0:02:41.681 --> 0:02:44.961 Where's the line we should parents back off and say, well, 0:02:45.001 --> 0:02:46.681 you know, I do believe this, but actually I should 0:02:46.681 --> 0:02:49.401 probably let little Jimmy or little Julie make up our 0:02:49.441 --> 0:02:49.761 own mind. 0:02:50.161 --> 0:02:52.321 Yeah, let them be kids. Well, I mean, I think 0:02:52.361 --> 0:02:54.921 we've got to take age into consideration when you are 0:02:54.921 --> 0:02:58.281 thinking about, you know, indoctrination. I don't like that word, 0:02:58.281 --> 0:03:00.561 and I don't think parents should do that to children. 0:03:00.721 --> 0:03:03.681 But I think if you're talking about young children, I mean, 0:03:03.961 --> 0:03:07.801 is there really a need for them to be part 0:03:07.881 --> 0:03:10.161 of a political environment when they've got a lot of 0:03:10.161 --> 0:03:12.121 other stuff going on? And you're quite right, I mean, 0:03:12.161 --> 0:03:16.161 you know, minds are developing, but children pick up on 0:03:16.201 --> 0:03:21.241 their parents' emotions, and that includes responses to political ideology. 0:03:21.361 --> 0:03:24.441 So if there is a child growing up in a 0:03:24.521 --> 0:03:27.761 very politicized kind of environment, they are going to pick 0:03:27.841 --> 0:03:29.881 up on it. I think a key point is that 0:03:30.521 --> 0:03:33.281 if children of any age come to you as a 0:03:33.281 --> 0:03:37.321 parent asking questions, then sure open the pathways of communication up. 0:03:37.561 --> 0:03:40.761 If you are attending a political event as a family, 0:03:41.761 --> 0:03:45.241 well in who's to question that because that's a parenting 0:03:45.361 --> 0:03:50.161 choice and parents are obviously the architects of their children's destiny. However, 0:03:50.281 --> 0:03:53.921 you know, kids probably need time to just be kids, 0:03:54.881 --> 0:03:56.881 and they've got a lot to deal with and there's 0:03:56.881 --> 0:04:01.001 a lot of growth that occurs you know, physiologically, brain wise, 0:04:01.401 --> 0:04:06.281 and also they're not necessarily equipped. They are not equipped 0:04:06.361 --> 0:04:09.001 from an early age even in terms of you know, 0:04:09.281 --> 0:04:14.281 cerebral stuff to deal with huge and complex issues because 0:04:14.321 --> 0:04:17.881 they have very rudimentary brains that are still you know, in. 0:04:17.841 --> 0:04:19.521 Terms of unless they have been unless they are that 0:04:19.601 --> 0:04:24.361 special kid who's a huge consumer of history and politics 0:04:24.401 --> 0:04:26.681 and things, then really the view of the world is 0:04:26.721 --> 0:04:27.961 pretty limited. 0:04:28.401 --> 0:04:30.721 Hey, and you are not that child at five or 0:04:30.801 --> 0:04:34.961 four or six or seven. I mean, children's anxiety can 0:04:35.001 --> 0:04:40.681 be exacerpated by their parents' ideology indirectly and unintentionally. But 0:04:40.801 --> 0:04:43.921 kids can pick up on you know, anger or you know, 0:04:44.281 --> 0:04:48.321 robust discussion that tips over into you know, emotional stuff, 0:04:48.361 --> 0:04:51.241 and they can have heightened levels of anxiety. So I 0:04:51.241 --> 0:04:54.041 guess parents possibly just need to take a you know, 0:04:54.161 --> 0:04:56.681 take a breath, take a pause, and think, so is 0:04:56.801 --> 0:05:00.081 this necessary? Is this what I really want from my child? 0:05:00.521 --> 0:05:02.361 Yeah? So, look, I want to hear from you. 0:05:02.521 --> 0:05:03.921 We want to hear from you on eight hundred and 0:05:03.921 --> 0:05:07.721 eighty ten eighty How hard should you push your political 0:05:07.761 --> 0:05:11.841 ideals onto your kids? Because there is also the question 0:05:11.921 --> 0:05:15.641 that arises that, for instance, this is not political at all. 0:05:16.121 --> 0:05:20.321 But my dad was a forestry scientist and he loved nature, 0:05:20.361 --> 0:05:22.801 and look so do I. But he would often when 0:05:22.801 --> 0:05:25.121 we're going for a walk or something, he'd rattle off 0:05:25.161 --> 0:05:28.521 the names of the different species, and it probably meant 0:05:28.601 --> 0:05:30.161 the last thing I ever wanted to do was to 0:05:30.161 --> 0:05:31.521 be a forestry scientists. 0:05:31.561 --> 0:05:33.641 That right, he was probably hoping for the exact opposite. 0:05:33.641 --> 0:05:35.241 Well, I don't think actually, to be honest, I think 0:05:35.241 --> 0:05:37.921 he was just sharing what he loved. But I think 0:05:37.961 --> 0:05:42.881 sometimes if you expect that you pushing your views onto 0:05:42.881 --> 0:05:44.561 your kids is going to mean that they're going to 0:05:44.641 --> 0:05:47.881 end up voting for your political sort of choices. I mean, 0:05:48.001 --> 0:05:51.041 rebellion does tend to play a part with kids, doesn't it. 0:05:51.081 --> 0:05:54.121 Well, certainly, if you're heading into those adolescent years and 0:05:54.161 --> 0:05:58.441 you haven't had a a specially good relationship with your parent, 0:05:58.961 --> 0:06:02.961 and you know there's a hard influence in a specific direction, 0:06:03.081 --> 0:06:04.961 you might find that absolutely kids will go in the 0:06:05.081 --> 0:06:07.921 opposite direction. But I mean, is that right to do 0:06:08.001 --> 0:06:10.041 that as a parent? Is it right not to just 0:06:10.921 --> 0:06:14.761 allow kids options and opportunities and allow them an understanding 0:06:14.801 --> 0:06:18.161 of all views and then see where it lands with 0:06:18.241 --> 0:06:21.521 that particular child. Is that not a more fair way 0:06:21.521 --> 0:06:22.321 to go about. 0:06:22.241 --> 0:06:24.921 I should share probably what I do with my kids 0:06:25.721 --> 0:06:28.881 in that. And they've asked a few questions and expressed 0:06:28.881 --> 0:06:32.241 different points of view because they've seen a headline of something. 0:06:32.521 --> 0:06:35.601 And I'll usually just ask them a couple of questions 0:06:35.841 --> 0:06:39.841 and say or I'll tell them, look, my opinion is 0:06:40.201 --> 0:06:42.961 slightly different to that, but I don't tell them that 0:06:43.001 --> 0:06:44.761 they're wrong. I say, you'll have to make up your 0:06:44.761 --> 0:06:46.801 own mind. I literally say that. I said, look, my 0:06:46.841 --> 0:06:48.681 opinion is this. I think you need to make up 0:06:48.721 --> 0:06:51.601 your own mind. But it's worth considering. Here are a 0:06:51.601 --> 0:06:55.281 few questions you could ask yourself about that. Why why 0:06:55.321 --> 0:06:57.441 are we not hearing that other side of the story, 0:06:57.521 --> 0:07:00.601 or why is that wrong? And can you imagine a 0:07:00.681 --> 0:07:03.761 situation where that person's point of view is just as valid? 0:07:04.121 --> 0:07:05.721 And then I leave it there, and the way they. 0:07:05.721 --> 0:07:10.201 Go, you're presenting your position in a more fair light, 0:07:10.361 --> 0:07:13.481 and you're giving them the opportunity to ask questions and 0:07:13.561 --> 0:07:17.041 have questions answered. So that's a dialogue, that's not a monologue, 0:07:17.081 --> 0:07:21.121 that's a that's not a type of indoctrination. That's giving 0:07:21.241 --> 0:07:24.601 children some information allowing them to run with it and 0:07:24.641 --> 0:07:27.081 then you know, I'm a great proponent of leave, of 0:07:27.121 --> 0:07:29.961 opening those pathways of communication and allowing children to come 0:07:30.001 --> 0:07:31.721 back to you, you know when and if they want. 0:07:32.641 --> 0:07:36.241 But I think indoctrination, no forcing kids to do stuff. 0:07:36.361 --> 0:07:40.121 Oh, indoctrination. It's such a strong word, but effectively I mean, 0:07:41.161 --> 0:07:44.761 I mean it's an inflammatory word, isn't it. But without 0:07:44.761 --> 0:07:47.401 getting carried away with ourselves, you could argue any form 0:07:47.441 --> 0:07:50.561 of instruction and telling your kids how the world works 0:07:50.561 --> 0:07:54.401 as indoctrination. I mean religions, the classic one. I mean, oh, 0:07:54.521 --> 0:07:58.241 I mean I've been thinking politics and almost almost ignoring 0:07:58.241 --> 0:08:00.321 the elephant in the room of what the big issues 0:08:00.361 --> 0:08:03.761 in life are. Because some might say that if you 0:08:04.281 --> 0:08:06.681 take your kids to long to church or not, I 0:08:06.721 --> 0:08:10.521 guess you're in I mean, most parents, if they are religious, 0:08:10.721 --> 0:08:14.201 they will it's not POSI fool around. They will indoctrinate 0:08:14.241 --> 0:08:16.361 their kids into their religion because they believe it's not 0:08:16.441 --> 0:08:18.961 just a question of political thing. They are convinced that 0:08:19.001 --> 0:08:21.081 this is the way things are. 0:08:22.361 --> 0:08:25.601 And then children come to a certain age, where as 0:08:25.641 --> 0:08:28.281 you say there could be rebellion, there is a lot 0:08:28.481 --> 0:08:32.041 more question asking. I mean, teenagers will not just sit 0:08:32.161 --> 0:08:35.041 there and allow their parents to say this is what 0:08:35.081 --> 0:08:37.281 it is, this is how it goes, this is what 0:08:37.321 --> 0:08:39.561 you will do. They say, But hang on, I feel 0:08:39.601 --> 0:08:42.801 like this or I want to do this. So there 0:08:42.881 --> 0:08:45.001 is a point where it becomes more of a discussion. 0:08:45.321 --> 0:08:48.641 So indoctrination, I mean, sure, you know, I'm not sure 0:08:48.681 --> 0:08:52.881 about people out there who indoctrinate. I don't personally know many. 0:08:53.041 --> 0:08:55.401 I know a lot of people who give kids options 0:08:55.481 --> 0:08:58.881 and allow them to have a discussion at an appropriate age. 0:08:58.881 --> 0:09:02.801 But certainly, as a parent, you have a responsibility to 0:09:03.441 --> 0:09:06.401 care for your children, and I guess some parents have 0:09:06.441 --> 0:09:10.401 different ways of doing that than others. But yeah, I 0:09:10.401 --> 0:09:13.201 think indoctrination is just another it's an inflammatory term. I 0:09:13.201 --> 0:09:14.441 mean influence. 0:09:14.041 --> 0:09:18.281 Istry slightly mischievously, but only you've got that mischievous look. 0:09:23.641 --> 0:09:24.841 It's a wonderful thing about radio. 0:09:25.241 --> 0:09:29.041 But yeah, but I guess that's the question about we 0:09:29.121 --> 0:09:31.601 want you. You want to influence your children to be 0:09:31.681 --> 0:09:33.761 good people, to have a good set of values, and 0:09:33.801 --> 0:09:36.041 to have successful you know, have I mean even defining 0:09:36.081 --> 0:09:37.521 success for them. It will be up for them in 0:09:37.561 --> 0:09:39.001 the end. But you want to set them up to 0:09:39.081 --> 0:09:43.961 be happy, I guess, And it is an interesting question 0:09:43.961 --> 0:09:45.801 as to how far you push certain things, because I 0:09:45.841 --> 0:09:48.641 know lots of people who have, for instance, very religious 0:09:48.681 --> 0:09:51.841 parents and they're completely non religious because somehow it didn't 0:09:51.881 --> 0:09:53.081 rub off even though. 0:09:54.001 --> 0:09:57.121 Yea, even though it was there. Well, I guess, and 0:09:57.201 --> 0:10:00.041 I've known families like that too, and I've I've actually 0:10:00.121 --> 0:10:02.481 been very impressed with the fact that the parents have 0:10:02.601 --> 0:10:07.441 remained on their course, but equally they've accepted that their children, 0:10:07.841 --> 0:10:10.441 you know, have made different decisions as they've become teenagers 0:10:10.481 --> 0:10:13.681 and beyond, and the family unit still works. It doesn't 0:10:13.721 --> 0:10:18.081 mean I mean, it's more about having views and being 0:10:19.761 --> 0:10:23.041 you know, responsible in terms of your parenting of young children, 0:10:23.121 --> 0:10:25.841 and then allowing children to kind of, you know, do 0:10:26.081 --> 0:10:29.121 their thing and make their own decisions as they age 0:10:29.121 --> 0:10:30.801 and as they get to a point where they're able 0:10:30.801 --> 0:10:32.321 to do that. But I mean, there is a reason 0:10:32.761 --> 0:10:34.761 that we don't let seven year olds vote. 0:10:34.921 --> 0:10:38.521 There is a rest Well, actually I would, I would say, 0:10:38.561 --> 0:10:39.641 and there's a reason we don't. 0:10:39.641 --> 0:10:41.241 After sixteen year old's vote. 0:10:41.281 --> 0:10:41.961 Well, that's right. 0:10:42.001 --> 0:10:44.441 I mean, how long have you really been around forming 0:10:44.441 --> 0:10:46.761 a bit of experience in the world. There are exceptions. 0:10:47.041 --> 0:10:48.721 I work with someone who's an exception to that it 0:10:48.761 --> 0:10:50.801 was politically active from quite an early age, but. 0:10:50.881 --> 0:10:54.761 Generally yeah, well, you know, life is all about continuums, 0:10:54.801 --> 0:10:57.681 so you are going to have exceptions and then everybody 0:10:57.921 --> 0:11:00.761 you know, everything else in between. But yeah, I mean, 0:11:00.801 --> 0:11:06.161 I think that giving children the opportunity to see all sides, 0:11:06.241 --> 0:11:11.441 to hear different stories, to gather facts from several sources, 0:11:11.441 --> 0:11:16.161 whether it's parents, grandparents, and then to you know, encourage 0:11:16.161 --> 0:11:18.601 them to make their own decisions under the umbrella of 0:11:19.161 --> 0:11:21.241 you know, of course there's influence you know in the 0:11:21.241 --> 0:11:25.401 family home and in the parental and family set up, 0:11:26.081 --> 0:11:29.321 but I just don't think pushing them into things and 0:11:29.441 --> 0:11:33.721 necessarily yeah, I mean, for a lot of kids, having 0:11:33.721 --> 0:11:36.961 a day off school to go to a political rally 0:11:37.081 --> 0:11:39.641 is just a day off school, doesn't mean that much. 0:11:39.681 --> 0:11:43.121 Well yeah, I'm I don't know what. 0:11:43.361 --> 0:11:46.081 I haven't crossed that bridge yet. If my kids wanted 0:11:46.081 --> 0:11:48.521 to take time off school to go attend a political rally, 0:11:49.961 --> 0:11:52.081 and I don't really know what I think because my 0:11:53.041 --> 0:11:55.521 as someone who's not quite at that cusp of making 0:11:55.521 --> 0:12:00.521 those decisions, Yeah, I would lean to you, blomen whilest 0:12:00.561 --> 0:12:02.481 at school and do your classes. You take time off 0:12:02.521 --> 0:12:05.601 when you're second when you've got Yeah, I think schools 0:12:05.641 --> 0:12:06.081 for school. 0:12:06.361 --> 0:12:07.801 You read about it in the news. 0:12:07.881 --> 0:12:09.561 You know, and you can see it online. You can 0:12:09.641 --> 0:12:13.161 access you know, the visuals and the input another way 0:12:13.241 --> 0:12:14.281 without taking time off. 0:12:14.401 --> 0:12:17.441 I can imagine the only it would be probably cause related. 0:12:17.441 --> 0:12:19.441 If if the cause was I want to be able 0:12:19.481 --> 0:12:23.921 to vote at sixteen versus eighteen, maybe I'd say, okay. 0:12:23.761 --> 0:12:26.201 If you really feel it strong. None, I think i'd 0:12:26.201 --> 0:12:28.441 be nut. But I don't know. 0:12:28.521 --> 0:12:30.001 I could change my mind on that one and flip 0:12:30.001 --> 0:12:32.281 flop you what did you do as a as a 0:12:32.361 --> 0:12:34.601 mum with did you ever have to face those. 0:12:34.521 --> 0:12:36.841 No, I actually didn't know. That wasn't something I came 0:12:36.921 --> 0:12:40.321 up against. I probably would have had the discussion because 0:12:40.361 --> 0:12:44.681 I really like leaving those pathways of communication open. But 0:12:44.801 --> 0:12:47.081 I think that it would depend for me on the 0:12:47.161 --> 0:12:49.681 child on the day, what they had going on at school. 0:12:49.681 --> 0:12:51.481 For example, if it was a teacher's only day, no 0:12:51.561 --> 0:12:54.481 problem there because they're not at school. If it was 0:12:54.521 --> 0:12:55.841 an exam day, no, I. 0:12:56.801 --> 0:12:57.881 Think that's an easy one. 0:12:58.001 --> 0:12:59.681 Okay, you've got an exam line. 0:13:00.121 --> 0:13:02.441 Well, but if it was equally, if it was a 0:13:02.481 --> 0:13:05.641 class that I felt they needed to attend, because perhaps 0:13:05.721 --> 0:13:08.561 that was a subject that they found difficult. No, I 0:13:08.601 --> 0:13:12.121 would probably say, probably go to school. What are your 0:13:12.121 --> 0:13:14.481 reasons for you know, because this is really important in 0:13:14.561 --> 0:13:18.361 terms of your ongoing education. You can access the information 0:13:19.281 --> 0:13:23.361 on the TV, through a print media or online, so 0:13:23.481 --> 0:13:26.521 there are options where by children don't have to miss 0:13:26.521 --> 0:13:29.521 out on school or things like that. But of course 0:13:29.921 --> 0:13:32.401 there are also family dictates, and a lot of families, 0:13:32.561 --> 0:13:35.321 you know, think it's important for their children to be 0:13:35.401 --> 0:13:39.401 part of a ekoi or a political event or something 0:13:39.441 --> 0:13:39.721 like that. 0:13:39.881 --> 0:13:42.281 The question around attending a protest is I guess it's 0:13:42.401 --> 0:13:44.361 just what are the questions you would ask as a 0:13:44.401 --> 0:13:46.961 parent for yourself as to how you responded to that. 0:13:47.041 --> 0:13:51.721 And I think what you've suggested, Yeah, if they've got 0:13:51.721 --> 0:13:54.001 some important classes age wise, I mean, look, if they're 0:13:54.001 --> 0:13:55.641 eight or nine and then whatever to protest, I'm like, 0:13:55.681 --> 0:13:59.921 you're kidding. But when you get to the say fifteen 0:14:00.001 --> 0:14:04.001 or sixteen or seventeen, maybe there is a nuance to 0:14:04.081 --> 0:14:05.641 that you can be a little flexible. 0:14:05.921 --> 0:14:08.321 And I think that if you're an authoritative parent and 0:14:08.361 --> 0:14:12.801 you choose that more flexible parenting style, then you will 0:14:12.841 --> 0:14:15.401 be open to having conversations with your children. I mean 0:14:15.761 --> 0:14:19.321 children can benefit or so the research suggests, from learning 0:14:19.321 --> 0:14:22.521 to be open to different viewpoints even if you don't 0:14:22.561 --> 0:14:24.081 agree with them and they don't agree with them, but 0:14:24.201 --> 0:14:27.961 just letting that information wash over them, seeing how it lands, 0:14:28.161 --> 0:14:32.641 seeing how to fix them can be you know, enlightening 0:14:33.281 --> 0:14:34.081 at the very least. 0:14:34.321 --> 0:14:36.681 Okay, we want to have from you on the political front. 0:14:36.721 --> 0:14:38.601 If your kids want to go and join a protest, 0:14:38.681 --> 0:14:41.241 is it something you should encourage or Tom, you know what, 0:14:41.641 --> 0:14:43.921 stay at school. You've got other priorities. You can protest 0:14:43.921 --> 0:14:47.721 when you've when you've got a job, your employee gives 0:14:47.721 --> 0:14:50.281 your permission, I don't know, give us a call. And 0:14:50.521 --> 0:14:54.241 in terms of your own political opinions, how much should 0:14:54.241 --> 0:14:56.881 you push those on your kids? Given that it might 0:14:56.921 --> 0:14:59.521 not be a winning scenario If they're this type of 0:14:59.601 --> 0:15:01.441 child who is likely to say what a mum and 0:15:01.481 --> 0:15:03.841 dad believe, I'll do exactly the opposite. So it's not 0:15:03.841 --> 0:15:05.601 always a winning tactics. So what that starts? 0:15:05.641 --> 0:15:06.281 Do you take to that? 0:15:07.041 --> 0:15:10.561 I eight one hundred eighty ten eighty text nine two 0:15:10.681 --> 0:15:12.321 nine two. My guest is Sarah chap when she's a 0:15:12.361 --> 0:15:15.001 psychologist with now tell us where people can get. 0:15:14.921 --> 0:15:16.881 In touch with you, so mind work stock coo dot 0:15:17.001 --> 0:15:19.681 in Z. I am happy to answer any questions and 0:15:19.721 --> 0:15:22.161 I've had some lovely feedback from people listening to the 0:15:22.161 --> 0:15:26.041 Parenting Squad. You're quite a popular guide to with these conversations. 0:15:26.121 --> 0:15:27.961 I'll have to get you back things like that. 0:15:28.201 --> 0:15:30.881 Okay, it's twenty two past five News Talks ed B. 0:15:34.241 --> 0:15:34.761 Love me. 0:15:36.601 --> 0:15:36.961 Listen. 0:15:37.161 --> 0:15:39.721 Thank you so you can see. 0:15:41.121 --> 0:15:42.401 Stands so. 0:15:44.681 --> 0:15:50.841 Dostal you can see. 0:15:51.081 --> 0:15:53.241 Just welcome back to News Talks ed B. This is 0:15:53.281 --> 0:15:55.921 the weekend collective and the Parents Squad my guest to 0:15:55.961 --> 0:15:58.481 Sarah chap when she's a psychologist talking about politics in 0:15:58.521 --> 0:16:01.561 the home and how much you should shove your politics 0:16:01.561 --> 0:16:03.121 on your kids. And we're going to I think we're 0:16:03.161 --> 0:16:05.481 going to move to the with a a little bit 0:16:05.481 --> 0:16:07.241 more conversation. We're gonna take some calls in a second. 0:16:07.361 --> 0:16:09.481 But I think there is a good argument that maybe 0:16:09.841 --> 0:16:12.601 politics should be just left out altogether of the family 0:16:12.641 --> 0:16:16.281 home and talk about anything. But is something we're going 0:16:16.281 --> 0:16:20.241 to explore in a moment. But first let's take some calls. Matthew, Hello, 0:16:21.361 --> 0:16:21.961 hello there. 0:16:23.361 --> 0:16:25.681 Yeah, I agree that you should leave politics out in 0:16:25.721 --> 0:16:28.441 the home. Yep, where if you could come home and 0:16:28.441 --> 0:16:31.401 they say I want to go to this protest. A 0:16:31.441 --> 0:16:34.441 good question to ask them is why, what do they 0:16:34.561 --> 0:16:38.521 understand about the protest? What do they really understand? And 0:16:38.561 --> 0:16:42.281 where do they get the information? Is that a free 0:16:42.361 --> 0:16:43.321 that's talk them into it? 0:16:43.841 --> 0:16:47.881 And what is their motivation? Those are great questions, Matthew. 0:16:47.881 --> 0:16:50.041 That is exactly what I would be asking the kids 0:16:50.081 --> 0:16:51.321 if they popped up with that. 0:16:52.401 --> 0:16:56.961 Yes, and do they understand what it means if they 0:16:56.961 --> 0:17:00.841 get what they want? Do they really understand everything's interconnected? 0:17:04.081 --> 0:17:04.281 Yeah? 0:17:04.401 --> 0:17:08.361 In protest about how the British came to New Zealand 0:17:08.361 --> 0:17:10.641 and colonized and it was a bad thing, you know what, 0:17:11.401 --> 0:17:15.281 I think it wasn't the greatest thing. But if you 0:17:15.401 --> 0:17:18.321 want to carry on that now you're actually dividing the country. 0:17:19.001 --> 0:17:23.481 So you've got to ask people what does it do 0:17:23.761 --> 0:17:24.801 for everyone? 0:17:24.961 --> 0:17:26.921 What would what would you say if they just said 0:17:26.921 --> 0:17:29.361 I want to go because my friends are all going 0:17:29.881 --> 0:17:36.041 and it sounds like it's an important issue, ask. 0:17:35.961 --> 0:17:37.761 Them the thing about it? So, yeah, okay, we'll go, 0:17:37.921 --> 0:17:40.681 but really and ask them to observe what they see. 0:17:42.601 --> 0:17:45.361 Ask other people at their process why are you here? 0:17:45.481 --> 0:17:47.841 And you'll find most people don't know why they're. 0:17:49.321 --> 0:17:51.841 Actually that's probably that's actually that is actually quite a 0:17:51.841 --> 0:17:54.161 good bit of advice, Matthew to just ask you because 0:17:54.161 --> 0:17:56.201 if you're going to go on this, talk to people 0:17:56.201 --> 0:17:59.721 and ask them why they're up, you know, why that 0:17:59.761 --> 0:18:03.041 they're protesting, and have some conversations because. 0:18:04.561 --> 0:18:07.081 Yeah, it's not a bad idea, but we do. 0:18:07.041 --> 0:18:08.961 Have to be aware of peer group pressure. It's not 0:18:09.121 --> 0:18:11.761 always the best reason to do anything, really, but I 0:18:12.241 --> 0:18:13.081 get it. 0:18:13.081 --> 0:18:16.801 It's yeah, yeah, thanks, we call mate, appreciate it. 0:18:17.481 --> 0:18:17.681 Jan. 0:18:17.881 --> 0:18:22.961 Hi, It's Jen, Yes, I know hello Jan? How are you? 0:18:23.001 --> 0:18:24.201 He got your name right? Jack? 0:18:25.041 --> 0:18:33.041 It sounded like a high parent. Now that's South Wellington 0:18:33.161 --> 0:18:38.801 Intermediate principle allowing their children the day off to go 0:18:38.881 --> 0:18:45.881 and join that protest in Wellington. The eleven twelve year 0:18:45.921 --> 0:18:49.601 old children, their parents will have to drive them into 0:18:49.801 --> 0:18:55.161 central City to the Parliament and if anything, if they 0:18:55.201 --> 0:18:59.561 can go by the last protest where it became extremely 0:19:00.401 --> 0:19:05.041 violent and dangerous all hell broke out. I think any 0:19:05.201 --> 0:19:10.281 parent that wants to go in there and risk putting 0:19:10.321 --> 0:19:14.041 their children through all that sort of helf need to 0:19:14.121 --> 0:19:15.361 have their heads checked. 0:19:16.121 --> 0:19:17.561 Actually, that is a point, isn't it. 0:19:17.521 --> 0:19:19.001 At school as well? 0:19:19.321 --> 0:19:19.921 That is a point. 0:19:19.921 --> 0:19:22.081 Actually, if there's a potential for violence and things, I 0:19:22.081 --> 0:19:23.961 mean we can think about that, we can think about 0:19:24.001 --> 0:19:26.321 protests that have gone the wrong way. I hadn't even 0:19:26.321 --> 0:19:27.841 thought about that from that personal. 0:19:27.561 --> 0:19:30.281 Safety and that's what parents have. 0:19:30.801 --> 0:19:34.681 To play with them as well. So it's a very 0:19:34.721 --> 0:19:38.601 bad decision making. The better thing those parents need to 0:19:38.681 --> 0:19:42.481 take their children home and keep them right out of it. 0:19:42.761 --> 0:19:43.761 That's my opinion. 0:19:44.081 --> 0:19:46.601 Well, because we've got that, thanks, thanks Jans Jan, because 0:19:46.601 --> 0:19:50.601 we've got that issue where yeah, the Wellington Girls principal, 0:19:52.281 --> 0:19:55.241 Oh no, sorry, there's sorry, there's a there are some 0:19:55.601 --> 0:19:57.521 there was a principal who was encouraging kids to go 0:19:57.601 --> 0:19:59.401 on the protest or the he coin things like that, 0:19:59.401 --> 0:20:01.441 and let's keep the politics out of it. But I 0:20:01.521 --> 0:20:04.281 tend to think, well, there's a political aspect of that 0:20:04.281 --> 0:20:07.681 that school principles should simply keep. I mean, as public servants, 0:20:07.721 --> 0:20:10.281 you should keep your own thoughts and encouragements on politics 0:20:10.321 --> 0:20:10.641 out of it. 0:20:10.681 --> 0:20:14.001 But also, how do they know the setup in each 0:20:14.041 --> 0:20:16.241 one of those children's families. I mean, there may not 0:20:16.281 --> 0:20:19.001 have been mum and dad's available, as Jan mentioned, to 0:20:19.001 --> 0:20:21.881 get the children to point a and to have them 0:20:21.961 --> 0:20:25.681 monitor and look after them. And equally, she pointed out 0:20:25.841 --> 0:20:28.881 she made a valid point about violence or if something happens, 0:20:29.321 --> 0:20:32.001 I mean, maybe even somebody carrying a glass bottle or 0:20:32.001 --> 0:20:33.841 something breaks and it cuts. I mean, there are so 0:20:33.881 --> 0:20:35.561 many things that can happen, and we really need to 0:20:35.561 --> 0:20:40.201 look after our children. And of course, again age dependent, 0:20:40.801 --> 0:20:43.121 you can't just be putting children up for this. It 0:20:43.161 --> 0:20:46.401