1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:03,400 Speaker 1: Now an increasing number of couples are ending their marriages 2 00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:05,840 Speaker 1: later in life. So it turns out, according to stats 3 00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:10,480 Speaker 1: New Zealand data, almost forty percent of divorces are involving 4 00:00:10,520 --> 00:00:14,320 Speaker 1: people who are fifty years plus. Divorce lawyer at Shortland Chambers, 5 00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:18,599 Speaker 1: Jeremy Sutton is with us now, Jeremy, how are you doing? 6 00:00:18,720 --> 00:00:20,480 Speaker 2: I may share best in chambers? 7 00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:20,919 Speaker 1: Oh? 8 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:27,159 Speaker 2: Sorry, which which chambers? Our best in chambers? It's in 9 00:00:27,240 --> 00:00:27,960 Speaker 2: the same boarding. 10 00:00:28,440 --> 00:00:30,600 Speaker 1: We'll say it as many times as we can, Jeremy, 11 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:33,599 Speaker 1: to undo the damage we've just done. So Bastian Chambers, 12 00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:35,879 Speaker 1: thank you for that listening. You're seeing this as well 13 00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:37,919 Speaker 1: as you seeing older people getting divorces. 14 00:00:39,680 --> 00:00:44,880 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, we are, because once the last child is 15 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:49,239 Speaker 2: left home, that's often a catalyst either to see if 16 00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:52,400 Speaker 2: I've got the same interest or not, and one party 17 00:00:52,479 --> 00:00:56,560 Speaker 2: is often wanting to continue working in some way so 18 00:00:56,600 --> 00:01:00,000 Speaker 2: as a consultant, while the other party is keeping your 19 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:03,120 Speaker 2: do other things, maybe travel, will maybe spend time with family. 20 00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:06,920 Speaker 1: Yeah. Is it also sometimes that the last kid leaves 21 00:01:06,920 --> 00:01:08,640 Speaker 1: and then you're stuck looking at that person. You're like, oh, 22 00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:10,160 Speaker 1: I stopped liking you ages ago. 23 00:01:12,240 --> 00:01:14,399 Speaker 2: Well, it certainly means you've got to spend more time together, 24 00:01:14,680 --> 00:01:21,640 Speaker 2: you know. It just it's tough, but it's a reality. 25 00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:24,119 Speaker 2: I mean for a lot of people, perhaps they saying, well, 26 00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:25,960 Speaker 2: the house is too big now, Heather, you know, we've 27 00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:30,160 Speaker 2: we've got to downside to an apartment. And often with 28 00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:34,600 Speaker 2: house prices over the years being good and kV saves 29 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:37,959 Speaker 2: as well, people have often got enough money to have 30 00:01:38,040 --> 00:01:40,920 Speaker 2: one house each so they can go to line, they 31 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:45,520 Speaker 2: can be independent. And and the other thing is technology 32 00:01:45,560 --> 00:01:48,040 Speaker 2: makes it easy for people, doesn't It makes it easy 33 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:50,400 Speaker 2: to book travel, makes it easier to meet someone else. 34 00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:53,360 Speaker 2: So that's a factor as well. I think it's just 35 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:57,320 Speaker 2: more life is more flexible, but probably more difficult. 36 00:01:57,680 --> 00:02:01,280 Speaker 1: Jeremy, I saw somebody so today that women are often 37 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:03,760 Speaker 1: the initiators of this divorce when you're in the fifty 38 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:05,680 Speaker 1: plus category, are you seeing. 39 00:02:05,360 --> 00:02:16,560 Speaker 2: That, Well, they probably are, but it's not necessarily because 40 00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:19,679 Speaker 2: of an affair. It's often that they just you know, 41 00:02:19,960 --> 00:02:24,480 Speaker 2: they've got the confidence to be able to do something 42 00:02:24,800 --> 00:02:28,239 Speaker 2: you know now and perhaps go overseas that they couldn't 43 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:28,880 Speaker 2: do before. 44 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,640 Speaker 1: I don't want to be too unkind to men, but 45 00:02:31,720 --> 00:02:33,920 Speaker 1: how much of it is also because women carry the 46 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,480 Speaker 1: mental load and the emotional load in a relationship and 47 00:02:36,520 --> 00:02:38,360 Speaker 1: they just get a little bit naffed off. And by 48 00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:40,560 Speaker 1: the time you're in your fifties, you're like, you actually 49 00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:42,880 Speaker 1: have had the chance to grow up and you know, 50 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:45,560 Speaker 1: clean the bathroom after yourself. You just get tired of it. 51 00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:46,520 Speaker 1: Is that possibly that. 52 00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:52,240 Speaker 2: There could be an aspect of that perhaps have had 53 00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:56,040 Speaker 2: the traditional roles in their relationship. Yeah, and you've thought 54 00:02:56,040 --> 00:03:00,280 Speaker 2: that people might change and they haven't changed and just 55 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:04,080 Speaker 2: want to, you know, do something different, which, well, women 56 00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:07,240 Speaker 2: now really are more able to, aren't they. They've got that, 57 00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:13,320 Speaker 2: you know, they've got that. They've got that ability perhaps 58 00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:17,000 Speaker 2: to you know, work, work part time, to travel, to 59 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:21,160 Speaker 2: see other family members, to see children. Yeah, and perhaps 60 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:24,120 Speaker 2: some of them have just had enough of what's happened 61 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:26,519 Speaker 2: during all those times. I mean the average marriage is 62 00:03:26,560 --> 00:03:29,680 Speaker 2: about fifteen years, all the late about fifteen years, so 63 00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:33,679 Speaker 2: you know that means that people were in their sort 64 00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:37,080 Speaker 2: of mid to late forties onwards. We see a lot 65 00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:41,520 Speaker 2: of people who are in their fifties and sixties. Yeah, 66 00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:47,440 Speaker 2: and they you know, they have just on different paths. 67 00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:51,200 Speaker 2: I mean, for example, you can go on your Airbnb now, 68 00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:53,280 Speaker 2: can't you are heady? You know, you can go to 69 00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:56,400 Speaker 2: New York for a month now on an Airbnb. You 70 00:03:56,440 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 2: couldn't do that before. So there are just these tools 71 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:03,960 Speaker 2: that you have to enable you to travel. And we 72 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:07,120 Speaker 2: live longer than we lived before. I mean people are 73 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:13,400 Speaker 2: living much much longer, so they've just got those tools 74 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:14,200 Speaker 2: to be able to do that. 75 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:17,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, interesting stuff, Jeremy, thank you very much for lucrative 76 00:04:17,240 --> 00:04:21,680 Speaker 1: business for you. I'd imagine Jeremy Sutton of Bastian Chambers. 77 00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:25,200 Speaker 1: For more from Hither Duplessy Allen Drive, listen live to 78 00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:28,359 Speaker 1: news talks. It'd be from four pm weekdays, or follow 79 00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:30,120 Speaker 1: the podcast on iHeartRadio