1 00:00:09,093 --> 00:00:11,972 Speaker 1: You're listening to a podcast from news Talk zed B. 2 00:00:12,373 --> 00:00:16,133 Speaker 1: Follow this and our Wide Ranger podcast now on iHeartRadio. 3 00:00:17,093 --> 00:00:19,933 Speaker 2: So very sad news broke this morning that Key we psychologist, 4 00:00:20,012 --> 00:00:24,133 Speaker 2: author and broadcaster Nigel Latter died yesterday, a year after 5 00:00:24,173 --> 00:00:26,973 Speaker 2: being diagnosed with stomach cancer. He leaves behind his wife 6 00:00:27,093 --> 00:00:30,893 Speaker 2: Natalie Flynn, daughter Arena, son Kieren, and three step children, Elijah, 7 00:00:31,213 --> 00:00:35,493 Speaker 2: Maya and Leon. Bridget Tapsell is family spokesperson and also 8 00:00:35,573 --> 00:00:39,333 Speaker 2: Natalie's best friend, and she joins us on the line now, Bridget, 9 00:00:39,493 --> 00:00:42,253 Speaker 2: good afternoon to you and our deepest condolences to you 10 00:00:42,333 --> 00:00:42,813 Speaker 2: and the family. 11 00:00:43,853 --> 00:00:45,572 Speaker 3: Oh, Jena QUADAA thank you. 12 00:00:46,492 --> 00:00:49,053 Speaker 4: When you think back on your friendship with Nigel, what's 13 00:00:49,653 --> 00:00:51,773 Speaker 4: the first memory that pops into your mind? 14 00:00:55,613 --> 00:01:03,653 Speaker 3: For me personally? He went over and above what friends 15 00:01:03,693 --> 00:01:06,572 Speaker 3: normally do for me and my family in a situation 16 00:01:06,813 --> 00:01:10,813 Speaker 3: that was really sticky and uncomfortable, and he went out 17 00:01:10,853 --> 00:01:14,333 Speaker 3: on a limb for us and he was Yeah, he 18 00:01:14,453 --> 00:01:18,893 Speaker 3: advocated for a situation and he was brave and it 19 00:01:19,253 --> 00:01:22,932 Speaker 3: turned the situation around massively for us personally. That's the 20 00:01:22,973 --> 00:01:27,173 Speaker 3: type of human he is. He he was driven by 21 00:01:27,212 --> 00:01:30,012 Speaker 3: his galues and he stood by his Zalius and he 22 00:01:30,053 --> 00:01:36,053 Speaker 3: lives by Xalius. A very very special human, a person 23 00:01:36,413 --> 00:01:41,453 Speaker 3: who was well Maria, I would say, call Year, Dad, 24 00:01:42,253 --> 00:01:46,893 Speaker 3: call Year. He was love and love with Nigel and 25 00:01:46,932 --> 00:01:50,813 Speaker 3: a man of love. Yeah, and I feel right at 26 00:01:50,853 --> 00:01:54,333 Speaker 3: the moment if I look at the response from the 27 00:01:54,333 --> 00:01:58,413 Speaker 3: Prime Minister and all the responses that are happening around 28 00:01:58,453 --> 00:02:02,773 Speaker 3: the country, and as Natalie said, she feels like old 29 00:02:02,813 --> 00:02:08,573 Speaker 3: titlor is giving Nigel one huge hug right now. And 30 00:02:08,613 --> 00:02:10,733 Speaker 3: that's because of the man who he was. 31 00:02:11,333 --> 00:02:14,653 Speaker 4: Yeah, what was Nigel like away from from the camera? 32 00:02:14,853 --> 00:02:17,213 Speaker 4: And you know, people people like Tyler and I we 33 00:02:17,293 --> 00:02:19,972 Speaker 4: only know him from from enjoying his television shows and 34 00:02:20,252 --> 00:02:23,173 Speaker 4: reading his books. What was he like away from from 35 00:02:23,213 --> 00:02:26,133 Speaker 4: the camera and the public eye, bridget he was. 36 00:02:26,493 --> 00:02:30,613 Speaker 3: He was a very kind person, just very laid back 37 00:02:32,252 --> 00:02:35,133 Speaker 3: and obviously very very well known. So like if you 38 00:02:35,293 --> 00:02:37,813 Speaker 3: we'd go out for dinner, there would always be lots 39 00:02:37,853 --> 00:02:40,373 Speaker 3: of people would approach him and talk to him. He 40 00:02:41,252 --> 00:02:44,933 Speaker 3: had that kind of or about him. People wanted to 41 00:02:45,053 --> 00:02:47,773 Speaker 3: connect with him from seeing him on TV, from his 42 00:02:47,893 --> 00:02:52,333 Speaker 3: parenting shows, but after a while you actually forgot he 43 00:02:52,493 --> 00:02:55,653 Speaker 3: was famous because he was just he was a humble human, 44 00:02:56,293 --> 00:03:01,733 Speaker 3: very real, very focused on other people, not focused on him. Uh. 45 00:03:01,813 --> 00:03:07,133 Speaker 3: He was egoless. Yeah, a fantastic human. You would have 46 00:03:07,413 --> 00:03:10,692 Speaker 3: you would have loved his company, honestly, would have. He 47 00:03:10,733 --> 00:03:14,493 Speaker 3: would have made you both feel like you were the 48 00:03:14,493 --> 00:03:20,012 Speaker 3: most important before in the room. That's you gift. Yeah. 49 00:03:20,053 --> 00:03:22,053 Speaker 4: Yeah, I was ucky enough to interview a couple of times, 50 00:03:22,093 --> 00:03:25,653 Speaker 4: but yeah, and he was. He was lovely on those occasions. Now, 51 00:03:25,733 --> 00:03:28,933 Speaker 4: Nigel made You've got to say, he made psychology, which 52 00:03:28,933 --> 00:03:32,893 Speaker 4: is reasonally complex, complex ideas relatable to a lot of 53 00:03:33,293 --> 00:03:35,653 Speaker 4: New Zealanders in your opinion, What made him such a 54 00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:40,373 Speaker 4: good communicator of all these complex ideas well? 55 00:03:40,413 --> 00:03:42,653 Speaker 3: I actually would you know. Obviously I hit him and 56 00:03:42,733 --> 00:03:46,813 Speaker 3: Netalie on tap and Netalie's a psychologist as well, so 57 00:03:47,493 --> 00:03:50,213 Speaker 3: I had firsten experience of what it was like to 58 00:03:50,773 --> 00:03:54,173 Speaker 3: wring him up and say, hey, I've got this parenting problem. 59 00:03:54,333 --> 00:03:57,813 Speaker 3: What do you think? And he was just he just 60 00:03:57,853 --> 00:04:00,373 Speaker 3: didn't muck around like he would just get straight to 61 00:04:00,413 --> 00:04:03,053 Speaker 3: the point you know this is he was just black 62 00:04:03,093 --> 00:04:07,093 Speaker 3: and white. Compassionate of course, but just very pragmatic. And 63 00:04:07,173 --> 00:04:10,253 Speaker 3: I think for me that's what was very relatable, and 64 00:04:10,293 --> 00:04:13,053 Speaker 3: that's what I think the nation was relating to is 65 00:04:13,133 --> 00:04:16,253 Speaker 3: like there was nothing fluffy or nothing that you couldn't 66 00:04:16,293 --> 00:04:20,133 Speaker 3: sort of go, oh, that actually makes sense. Oh, and 67 00:04:20,213 --> 00:04:23,733 Speaker 3: I actually have some practical advice to walk away with 68 00:04:24,333 --> 00:04:27,893 Speaker 3: and make some positive change in my family and in 69 00:04:27,973 --> 00:04:31,693 Speaker 3: my children. And that's I mean, I mean you, I'm 70 00:04:31,733 --> 00:04:34,173 Speaker 3: sure you've seen his programs at DAM and that's probably 71 00:04:34,173 --> 00:04:36,693 Speaker 3: what you've saught as well. And that's that's he had 72 00:04:37,293 --> 00:04:41,093 Speaker 3: just the ability to connect to other people and communicate 73 00:04:41,173 --> 00:04:45,293 Speaker 3: in a way that wasn't too highbrow. You know, that 74 00:04:45,453 --> 00:04:48,733 Speaker 3: was just very you can understand them basically. Yeah, that's 75 00:04:48,813 --> 00:04:50,773 Speaker 3: that's kind of was my personal experience. 76 00:04:50,933 --> 00:04:53,493 Speaker 4: Yeah, I definitely came through in the way you experienced. 77 00:04:53,533 --> 00:04:57,373 Speaker 4: And he seems very similar on as broadcasting as in 78 00:04:57,453 --> 00:05:00,013 Speaker 4: his writing as he was to you in person. Now 79 00:05:00,013 --> 00:05:02,413 Speaker 4: I just started speaking of his writing. I just started 80 00:05:02,453 --> 00:05:06,533 Speaker 4: reading his new book, Lessens on Living, and you know, 81 00:05:06,573 --> 00:05:09,973 Speaker 4: it starts off with some pretty hor stories of you know, 82 00:05:10,093 --> 00:05:12,213 Speaker 4: time he spent with people that have done some pretty 83 00:05:13,093 --> 00:05:17,253 Speaker 4: horrific things. He he he had to deal with a 84 00:05:17,293 --> 00:05:22,253 Speaker 4: lot of that that that serious, horrible dark side of society, 85 00:05:23,333 --> 00:05:27,373 Speaker 4: crime and murder and parenting gone wrong. But he was 86 00:05:27,413 --> 00:05:31,013 Speaker 4: also very funny. How did that did that? Did that 87 00:05:31,573 --> 00:05:34,093 Speaker 4: stuff affect him? Because it would be hard to keep 88 00:05:34,093 --> 00:05:37,213 Speaker 4: that completely out of out of your your life when 89 00:05:37,213 --> 00:05:39,493 Speaker 4: you're you're doing that that sort of stuff professionally. 90 00:05:41,253 --> 00:05:44,213 Speaker 3: I mean, I I didn't see any sign of that 91 00:05:44,293 --> 00:05:47,573 Speaker 3: affecting him. I felt that he was able to. I mean, 92 00:05:47,573 --> 00:05:49,973 Speaker 3: I think when you're an empathetic critician, you're able to 93 00:05:50,013 --> 00:05:55,373 Speaker 3: put the darkness of life into context, a way to context, 94 00:05:55,413 --> 00:06:01,453 Speaker 3: and he obviously had the ability to do that. So yeah, 95 00:06:01,653 --> 00:06:11,293 Speaker 3: he was his his ah, I think parkd his his 96 00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:14,453 Speaker 3: being was always so positive, you know, it was always 97 00:06:14,533 --> 00:06:18,213 Speaker 3: so up. It was also so hopeful, always so optimistic. 98 00:06:18,653 --> 00:06:21,453 Speaker 3: You know of anybody who know I think you know, 99 00:06:22,053 --> 00:06:26,493 Speaker 3: you can't escape some of the shadows of life. So 100 00:06:26,573 --> 00:06:29,013 Speaker 3: that was a reality. But you know, it depends what 101 00:06:29,053 --> 00:06:31,653 Speaker 3: you focus on. And so I learned from him that 102 00:06:31,853 --> 00:06:34,133 Speaker 3: it is what depends what you focus on, like focus 103 00:06:34,173 --> 00:06:36,893 Speaker 3: on the good, focus on the beauty, focus on the positivity. 104 00:06:37,253 --> 00:06:40,013 Speaker 3: And he was testament to that. That's how he lived. 105 00:06:40,933 --> 00:06:44,613 Speaker 2: The honesty and that pragmatism that he showed Bridget when 106 00:06:44,613 --> 00:06:48,693 Speaker 2: he was diagnosed clearly resonated with so so many people 107 00:06:48,773 --> 00:06:50,773 Speaker 2: in New Zealand who are going through a similar thing 108 00:06:51,053 --> 00:06:55,293 Speaker 2: and provided them comfort because it was so honest and 109 00:06:55,293 --> 00:06:59,013 Speaker 2: and that philosophy and as you say, that pragmatism that 110 00:06:59,093 --> 00:07:02,653 Speaker 2: he was he was so talented at. When the message 111 00:07:02,813 --> 00:07:06,453 Speaker 2: messages I no doubt started flooding in from people going 112 00:07:06,493 --> 00:07:08,733 Speaker 2: through something similar, how did Nigel and the thing deal 113 00:07:08,773 --> 00:07:17,813 Speaker 2: with it. 114 00:07:13,413 --> 00:07:18,573 Speaker 3: With grace and with dignity and with understanding, you know, 115 00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:22,653 Speaker 3: I mean that's I mean, I've never had cancer, so 116 00:07:22,733 --> 00:07:25,853 Speaker 3: I don't know that. I can only imagine how difficult 117 00:07:25,893 --> 00:07:29,893 Speaker 3: that is to navigate. Yeah, so he did it with humility, 118 00:07:30,013 --> 00:07:36,293 Speaker 3: strength and dignity and very honest communications within in a circle. 119 00:07:37,173 --> 00:07:42,093 Speaker 3: But having said that, though, the communication was always very optimistic, 120 00:07:42,493 --> 00:07:45,573 Speaker 3: and so last week when he went to the oncologist 121 00:07:45,773 --> 00:07:51,373 Speaker 3: on Wednesday, he went with optimism like he wasn't probably expecting, 122 00:07:51,573 --> 00:07:55,573 Speaker 3: you know, to find out that there was no there 123 00:07:55,613 --> 00:07:58,893 Speaker 3: was nothing else that could be done. So yeah, right 124 00:07:58,973 --> 00:08:01,373 Speaker 3: up until the last week, he was optimistic. 125 00:08:02,613 --> 00:08:05,093 Speaker 4: So you know, I think I've you've answered this sort 126 00:08:05,093 --> 00:08:08,613 Speaker 4: of throughout your your answers to our questions, But how 127 00:08:08,693 --> 00:08:10,413 Speaker 4: much of a gap do you think he will leave 128 00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:15,213 Speaker 4: in the country and then your personal life. 129 00:08:14,933 --> 00:08:19,173 Speaker 3: Bridget, I mean it's absolutely huge. I mean there's just 130 00:08:19,253 --> 00:08:25,813 Speaker 3: nobody like Angel Letter personally. For Natalie, I mean it's 131 00:08:25,853 --> 00:08:30,213 Speaker 3: a mass and under family and the children, it's an 132 00:08:30,333 --> 00:08:36,213 Speaker 3: undescribable loss. Yeah. And for me, I mean, gosh, I 133 00:08:36,253 --> 00:08:41,333 Speaker 3: didn't sleep last night so hard. It's hard to it's 134 00:08:41,372 --> 00:08:44,333 Speaker 3: hard to take the news, to be honest, I was, 135 00:08:44,973 --> 00:08:47,613 Speaker 3: like everybody else in this country, just hoping that he 136 00:08:47,732 --> 00:08:49,132 Speaker 3: was going to be a run for a lot longer. 137 00:08:49,933 --> 00:08:51,813 Speaker 4: Well, look, thank you so much for talking to us, 138 00:08:51,852 --> 00:08:54,853 Speaker 4: and look so sorry for you for your loss there, Bridget. 139 00:08:55,053 --> 00:09:00,213 Speaker 4: He was, as you say, at great human, great communicator, communicator, 140 00:09:00,252 --> 00:09:03,653 Speaker 4: and he sounds like a great friend too. So yeah, 141 00:09:03,892 --> 00:09:05,213 Speaker 4: I'm going to say so if you're. 142 00:09:05,053 --> 00:09:08,172 Speaker 2: Lost, thank you very much, Bridget. Yeah, lots of love 143 00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:10,053 Speaker 2: to you and to Natalie and the family as well. 144 00:09:10,132 --> 00:09:13,933 Speaker 2: That is Bridget Tepsil our close family friends of Natalie 145 00:09:13,973 --> 00:09:17,732 Speaker 2: and Nigel, speaking about the said loss of Nigel Letter. 146 00:09:18,252 --> 00:09:20,933 Speaker 1: For more from news Talk said b listen live on 147 00:09:20,973 --> 00:09:23,973 Speaker 1: air or online and keep our shows with you wherever 148 00:09:24,012 --> 00:09:26,573 Speaker 1: you go with our podcasts on iHeartRadio