1 00:00:09,093 --> 00:00:11,972 Speaker 1: You're listening to a podcast from news Talk zed B. 2 00:00:12,373 --> 00:00:16,173 Speaker 1: Follow this and our wide range of podcast now on iHeartRadio. 3 00:00:16,613 --> 00:00:20,453 Speaker 2: We're talking about men's mental health, particularly in the rural sector. 4 00:00:20,973 --> 00:00:23,692 Speaker 2: It was on the back of an amazing event you 5 00:00:23,733 --> 00:00:25,773 Speaker 2: were part of Matt's in Featherston. 6 00:00:26,133 --> 00:00:28,813 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's right, and down at the Featherston book Town 7 00:00:29,573 --> 00:00:33,093 Speaker 3: on a men's panel with Wayne Langford, the National President 8 00:00:33,093 --> 00:00:36,653 Speaker 3: of Federated Farmers. Patty Gower was there, Phil quinn It 9 00:00:36,653 --> 00:00:38,772 Speaker 3: it was a fantastic chat, but it actually hit me 10 00:00:38,973 --> 00:00:42,613 Speaker 3: quite hard. And you know, I sort of done a 11 00:00:42,653 --> 00:00:45,373 Speaker 3: bit of preparation in advance of the speech, but then 12 00:00:45,492 --> 00:00:48,932 Speaker 3: just hearing the stories and the full magnitude of how 13 00:00:49,013 --> 00:00:51,492 Speaker 3: rough it is out there in rural communities when it 14 00:00:51,492 --> 00:00:54,292 Speaker 3: comes to mental health at the moment actually actually hit 15 00:00:54,333 --> 00:00:54,853 Speaker 3: me pretty hard. 16 00:00:54,933 --> 00:00:57,973 Speaker 2: Yeah. On the line right now is Federated Farmers Dairy 17 00:00:58,013 --> 00:01:01,493 Speaker 2: Industry chair person and a man who was also on 18 00:01:01,533 --> 00:01:05,213 Speaker 2: the panel in Featherston, Wayne Langford. Wayne, very good afternoon 19 00:01:05,213 --> 00:01:05,413 Speaker 2: to you. 20 00:01:05,573 --> 00:01:07,093 Speaker 4: Hey, it's good to be here. Thank you. 21 00:01:07,653 --> 00:01:09,933 Speaker 3: It was good chat today. Wayne is good to see you. 22 00:01:09,973 --> 00:01:13,173 Speaker 3: And as I said to you after the chat, you 23 00:01:13,652 --> 00:01:16,493 Speaker 3: I love your I love your boots. And I've been 24 00:01:16,493 --> 00:01:21,413 Speaker 3: looking around for a similar heel. They're a good luck here, Wayne. 25 00:01:21,733 --> 00:01:24,372 Speaker 3: What are the distinct struggles that farmers face when it 26 00:01:24,413 --> 00:01:26,212 Speaker 3: comes when it comes to mental health? 27 00:01:27,572 --> 00:01:31,092 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean what's really challenging exactly from a farming circumstances. 28 00:01:31,133 --> 00:01:33,213 Speaker 4: The way that I describe it is the way that 29 00:01:33,253 --> 00:01:37,693 Speaker 4: the fog rolls in so in the way that you 30 00:01:37,813 --> 00:01:39,292 Speaker 4: kind of it sneaks up on you, and it catch 31 00:01:39,493 --> 00:01:42,093 Speaker 4: up on you like like you don't even know. Often. 32 00:01:43,613 --> 00:01:45,253 Speaker 4: You know, you've got a lot of decisions that you're 33 00:01:45,253 --> 00:01:47,813 Speaker 4: making on farm every day, whether bev your animals or 34 00:01:47,853 --> 00:01:50,413 Speaker 4: about the weather or about the grass or that. And 35 00:01:50,453 --> 00:01:52,333 Speaker 4: then and then you bring that home. On top of that, 36 00:01:52,373 --> 00:01:54,093 Speaker 4: You've you know, you've got your wife and your kids 37 00:01:54,133 --> 00:01:57,053 Speaker 4: and everything else that's going on at home, and in 38 00:01:57,093 --> 00:01:59,173 Speaker 4: a lot of cases that home is also on the 39 00:01:59,213 --> 00:02:01,053 Speaker 4: farm as well. So every time you look at the window, 40 00:02:01,133 --> 00:02:03,093 Speaker 4: you've got you've got this gun on at home, you 41 00:02:03,213 --> 00:02:05,493 Speaker 4: got that going on and outside, and sometimes it all 42 00:02:05,533 --> 00:02:07,892 Speaker 4: just sneaks up on you. And when I talk about 43 00:02:07,893 --> 00:02:10,413 Speaker 4: the fog, I guess you know, it's kind of if 44 00:02:10,493 --> 00:02:12,173 Speaker 4: you think about that from a mental picture, where the 45 00:02:12,213 --> 00:02:14,093 Speaker 4: fog rolls in and it just kind of keeps us 46 00:02:14,133 --> 00:02:16,613 Speaker 4: here a bit there and you get a bit stuck 47 00:02:16,613 --> 00:02:19,933 Speaker 4: and losters as a person in the way to go forward. 48 00:02:20,532 --> 00:02:22,293 Speaker 3: The isolation is a big part of it as well, 49 00:02:22,333 --> 00:02:25,853 Speaker 3: isn't it. Wayne, You said something yesterday that that really 50 00:02:25,893 --> 00:02:29,412 Speaker 3: hit me and that you know, you've got the tanker 51 00:02:29,493 --> 00:02:32,933 Speaker 3: driver turning up to grab the milk and that might 52 00:02:33,013 --> 00:02:35,693 Speaker 3: be your only contact for quite a period of time. 53 00:02:35,773 --> 00:02:37,733 Speaker 3: But he doesn't know how you're feeling. You don't know 54 00:02:37,733 --> 00:02:40,893 Speaker 3: how he's feeling. So is that just the fact you're 55 00:02:40,972 --> 00:02:43,213 Speaker 3: out on the land by yourself for a lot of 56 00:02:43,213 --> 00:02:45,213 Speaker 3: the time part of the struggle. 57 00:02:45,972 --> 00:02:48,773 Speaker 4: Yeah, So there's two sides of this, like so on 58 00:02:48,773 --> 00:02:50,453 Speaker 4: one side, it's got a whole lot better. We've got 59 00:02:50,453 --> 00:02:52,853 Speaker 4: social media now we can talk to each other. You know, 60 00:02:52,853 --> 00:02:54,653 Speaker 4: you got your group chats with your mates, that sort 61 00:02:54,693 --> 00:02:57,292 Speaker 4: of thing. You can engage. You know, most of the 62 00:02:57,333 --> 00:02:59,133 Speaker 4: rugby grounds now I've got sets of lights so we 63 00:02:59,213 --> 00:03:01,453 Speaker 4: train into the dark and sort of thing. So we're 64 00:03:01,493 --> 00:03:04,532 Speaker 4: set up to connect better. But the problem is is 65 00:03:04,573 --> 00:03:06,693 Speaker 4: that when you are in a bit of a dark place, 66 00:03:06,733 --> 00:03:09,293 Speaker 4: when you're not feeling too well, it's also very easy 67 00:03:09,293 --> 00:03:13,253 Speaker 4: to go the other way and actually be isolated. So 68 00:03:13,293 --> 00:03:16,853 Speaker 4: when you know you've got Royal New Zealand can be 69 00:03:17,053 --> 00:03:19,013 Speaker 4: can be really good, we can be better connected, but 70 00:03:19,093 --> 00:03:21,852 Speaker 4: at the same time it can be a real dark 71 00:03:21,893 --> 00:03:24,292 Speaker 4: trap if you do get isolated and do get stuck. 72 00:03:25,252 --> 00:03:28,933 Speaker 2: How important are those male relationships, Wayne, if there are 73 00:03:29,013 --> 00:03:31,852 Speaker 2: men who get into that that space and it can 74 00:03:31,933 --> 00:03:34,373 Speaker 2: be hard to reach out to their to their male mates. 75 00:03:34,413 --> 00:03:36,293 Speaker 2: But how important are those relationships? 76 00:03:37,253 --> 00:03:37,413 Speaker 3: Oh? 77 00:03:37,493 --> 00:03:42,693 Speaker 4: Absolutely, absolutely critical. I mean ultimately, just just being able 78 00:03:42,733 --> 00:03:45,933 Speaker 4: to tell anyone that that you're battling and struggling or 79 00:03:46,013 --> 00:03:48,813 Speaker 4: just something going on as really tough as it is 80 00:03:48,853 --> 00:03:51,573 Speaker 4: literally probably one of the hardest things I ever did. 81 00:03:53,613 --> 00:03:57,853 Speaker 4: But but but you know guys, well exactly myself, and 82 00:03:57,933 --> 00:03:59,453 Speaker 4: it's not always, but a lot of guys, you know, 83 00:03:59,493 --> 00:04:01,253 Speaker 4: they just need that mail camaraderie and they need to 84 00:04:01,293 --> 00:04:04,173 Speaker 4: have a joke and we we talk and laugh and 85 00:04:04,213 --> 00:04:07,293 Speaker 4: we do things differently as guys. Right, And I talked 86 00:04:07,373 --> 00:04:09,133 Speaker 4: yesterday when I was on the pan all that you know, 87 00:04:09,173 --> 00:04:11,893 Speaker 4: I joined back up to the senior b rugby club 88 00:04:11,933 --> 00:04:14,693 Speaker 4: and it wasn't about it wasn't about playing rugby because 89 00:04:14,693 --> 00:04:16,253 Speaker 4: I'm not the best rugby player in the world. It 90 00:04:16,373 --> 00:04:19,413 Speaker 4: was about you know, you know, having having someone, having 91 00:04:19,413 --> 00:04:21,773 Speaker 4: someone run at me, feeling alive again, you know, but 92 00:04:21,853 --> 00:04:24,653 Speaker 4: hanging out with the boys and there's nothing like you know, 93 00:04:24,693 --> 00:04:26,013 Speaker 4: when you run out on the field at the start 94 00:04:26,053 --> 00:04:28,013 Speaker 4: of a rugby game and you're in that huddle and 95 00:04:28,013 --> 00:04:31,893 Speaker 4: you look around and there's there's fifteen guys there and 96 00:04:31,973 --> 00:04:34,613 Speaker 4: you and you kind of look at the sideline. Is 97 00:04:34,653 --> 00:04:36,573 Speaker 4: there anyone else coming here or is it just us? 98 00:04:36,653 --> 00:04:40,613 Speaker 4: You know, and that's that sense of belonging, like, hey, 99 00:04:40,733 --> 00:04:42,213 Speaker 4: you know, these boys have got my back and I've 100 00:04:42,213 --> 00:04:44,973 Speaker 4: got theirs. If you're you know, if you he's not 101 00:04:44,973 --> 00:04:46,893 Speaker 4: in the best place. Sometimes something like that is uh, 102 00:04:47,613 --> 00:04:49,452 Speaker 4: you know, just pick you up and makes you feel, 103 00:04:49,853 --> 00:04:51,773 Speaker 4: you know, like someone's got your back again. 104 00:04:52,173 --> 00:04:53,773 Speaker 3: What did you say yesterday? You said you may not 105 00:04:53,813 --> 00:04:56,093 Speaker 3: have made an entire tackle the entire season, but you 106 00:04:56,173 --> 00:04:57,933 Speaker 3: held up one side of the scrum and that counted 107 00:04:57,933 --> 00:05:03,253 Speaker 3: for something. When you talk about that, that banter with 108 00:05:04,133 --> 00:05:07,053 Speaker 3: you know, between blokes is this is kind of banter 109 00:05:07,213 --> 00:05:09,493 Speaker 3: and it's you need it and that's where you kind 110 00:05:09,533 --> 00:05:12,573 Speaker 3: of wrap the crap out of each other and you know, 111 00:05:12,613 --> 00:05:15,653 Speaker 3: you insult each other and there's there's hard jokes and that, 112 00:05:15,733 --> 00:05:17,733 Speaker 3: and that feels good because it's as I was saying before, 113 00:05:17,773 --> 00:05:20,493 Speaker 3: that's like if someone can insult you, it kind of 114 00:05:20,533 --> 00:05:22,573 Speaker 3: means that they love you because you don't hit them 115 00:05:22,693 --> 00:05:26,293 Speaker 3: basically as the rationale of that. But there needs to 116 00:05:26,293 --> 00:05:29,213 Speaker 3: be another level to it, doesn't it. Because you've got 117 00:05:29,533 --> 00:05:32,773 Speaker 3: the banter, but then can you take it to it 118 00:05:32,973 --> 00:05:35,613 Speaker 3: to a deeper level with a friend that knows that 119 00:05:35,613 --> 00:05:37,973 Speaker 3: that you know you may think is struggling. Is that 120 00:05:38,053 --> 00:05:39,933 Speaker 3: an area that you managed to get to with any 121 00:05:39,933 --> 00:05:41,892 Speaker 3: of your friends to move it on? You're playing rugby, 122 00:05:41,933 --> 00:05:44,373 Speaker 3: you keep catching up, but actually moving that band to 123 00:05:44,453 --> 00:05:46,013 Speaker 3: you know, to that deeper level. 124 00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:51,333 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it's really important. And having having a 125 00:05:51,453 --> 00:05:53,653 Speaker 4: language you can use as well, which is you know, 126 00:05:54,093 --> 00:05:56,013 Speaker 4: a rolling god to a maintain saying hey mate, you 127 00:05:56,133 --> 00:05:59,093 Speaker 4: depressed or you know what's going on? You know you 128 00:05:59,293 --> 00:06:01,933 Speaker 4: really got up and say you know as you hit 129 00:06:01,933 --> 00:06:04,093 Speaker 4: all right at the moment, like you're doing all right? 130 00:06:04,173 --> 00:06:07,133 Speaker 4: You know that sort of stuff. You don't have to 131 00:06:07,173 --> 00:06:09,573 Speaker 4: go down the you know, the full path of what 132 00:06:09,613 --> 00:06:12,253 Speaker 4: you're thinking more, just just say mate, you know, how 133 00:06:12,293 --> 00:06:15,333 Speaker 4: are you doing? What's going on? And then and then 134 00:06:15,333 --> 00:06:17,173 Speaker 4: the other thing I know, particularly in a rural space 135 00:06:17,253 --> 00:06:20,333 Speaker 4: or from a farming sense, is it is just just 136 00:06:20,453 --> 00:06:24,453 Speaker 4: checking on some of the decisions I'm making, and and 137 00:06:24,493 --> 00:06:27,293 Speaker 4: that's way often from again from a farming point of view, 138 00:06:27,333 --> 00:06:30,693 Speaker 4: we see like typically if we if we see any 139 00:06:30,693 --> 00:06:32,933 Speaker 4: animal welfare cases or anything like that, a lot of 140 00:06:32,933 --> 00:06:36,133 Speaker 4: the times there's some form of mental health involved in 141 00:06:36,773 --> 00:06:41,413 Speaker 4: those cases because the farmers just stopped making some critical 142 00:06:41,413 --> 00:06:45,173 Speaker 4: decisions there and they all just compound on top of 143 00:06:45,173 --> 00:06:46,973 Speaker 4: each other. So if you if you see your main 144 00:06:48,413 --> 00:06:51,333 Speaker 4: maybe you should have done something a bit different there, 145 00:06:51,533 --> 00:06:53,453 Speaker 4: you know, maybe he's not making that decision for a 146 00:06:53,493 --> 00:06:55,853 Speaker 4: reason and it's just just a chance to ask. 147 00:06:56,613 --> 00:06:59,053 Speaker 3: Yeah, Well, thank you so much for talking to us. Wayne, 148 00:06:59,093 --> 00:07:01,093 Speaker 3: really really appreciate it was. It was great to meet 149 00:07:01,133 --> 00:07:04,173 Speaker 3: you yesterday. And I think what you do getting out 150 00:07:04,173 --> 00:07:06,933 Speaker 3: there and talking to people from that real experience you've 151 00:07:06,933 --> 00:07:10,293 Speaker 3: had is just as so fantastic. So you know, keep 152 00:07:10,333 --> 00:07:10,973 Speaker 3: up the good worker. 153 00:07:11,133 --> 00:07:11,893 Speaker 2: I really respect it. 154 00:07:12,613 --> 00:07:15,373 Speaker 4: Hey, cheers. I appreciate that. It was great, a great chat. 155 00:07:15,933 --> 00:07:18,333 Speaker 2: Thanks very much. Wayne. That is Wayne Langford. 156 00:07:18,973 --> 00:07:21,893 Speaker 1: For more from News Talks b listen live on air 157 00:07:22,093 --> 00:07:25,013 Speaker 1: or online and keep our shows with you wherever you go. 158 00:07:25,133 --> 00:07:27,293 Speaker 1: With our podcasts on iHeartRadio.