WEBVTT - Ask me anything! 0:00:00.880 --> 0:00:06.320 The ZM podcast Network. Hi guys, welcome back to what 0:00:06.519 --> 0:00:10.200 is the last episode of season three, Hopes Were All 0:00:10.200 --> 0:00:12.200 the podcast. I can't believe I'm saying that we've done 0:00:12.200 --> 0:00:14.360 another season already. I can't even believe that I got 0:00:14.400 --> 0:00:16.720 to do three seasons. But thank you so much for 0:00:17.040 --> 0:00:18.720 coming on this journey with me. If there's any of 0:00:18.720 --> 0:00:21.200 the episodes that you've missed it all, please go back 0:00:21.239 --> 0:00:23.360 and listen. The season has been filled with some of 0:00:23.400 --> 0:00:28.040 the most incredible people, some phenomenal stories. We've talked about 0:00:28.080 --> 0:00:31.000 such a wide range of different things, and I really 0:00:31.000 --> 0:00:34.760 think even if you personally aren't going through what is 0:00:34.800 --> 0:00:38.120 talked about in the episode right now, it's so educational 0:00:38.159 --> 0:00:41.280 and raw and kind of throughout the whole season, the 0:00:41.320 --> 0:00:44.320 stories have just been amazing, and I just want to 0:00:44.320 --> 0:00:46.440 thank you all for your support so far on this 0:00:46.479 --> 0:00:49.360 podcast and on the season. It's been so it's been 0:00:49.440 --> 0:00:51.680 so overwhelming. I can't believe that I get to do 0:00:51.760 --> 0:00:54.680 this and there I get trusted with people's stories and 0:00:54.760 --> 0:00:56.920 to be able to share them and share just a 0:00:56.960 --> 0:00:59.240 little bit more hope in the world where everything is 0:00:59.720 --> 0:01:02.080 going all there's so much happening at the moment and 0:01:02.120 --> 0:01:05.759 for people to be willing to speak and to share 0:01:05.800 --> 0:01:08.600 and to have these conversations and listen to these conversations 0:01:08.640 --> 0:01:11.920 means everything. And as always, if anything in this triggers you, 0:01:11.959 --> 0:01:14.440 please at any time you can stop, take a break, 0:01:15.080 --> 0:01:16.840 come back to it, or talk to someone if you 0:01:16.880 --> 0:01:19.240 need to. You're not alone. The bravest thing that you 0:01:19.280 --> 0:01:22.080 can do right now is to talk to someone, is 0:01:22.160 --> 0:01:24.680 to ask for help, whether that's from a friend, a 0:01:24.680 --> 0:01:27.240 family member, or if you don't know who to talk to, 0:01:27.400 --> 0:01:30.440 then if you live in Altieroa here you can call 0:01:30.560 --> 0:01:33.560 or text one seven three seven at any time to 0:01:33.600 --> 0:01:36.520 talk to a train counselor or if you live overseas, 0:01:36.560 --> 0:01:38.720 go to dub dub dub dot the Voices of Hope 0:01:38.720 --> 0:01:42.280 dot org for a list of international helplines. Remember that 0:01:42.319 --> 0:01:44.399 no matter what it is that you're facing, no matter 0:01:44.400 --> 0:01:47.200 what it is that you're going through, that in all things, 0:01:47.360 --> 0:01:56.000 hope is real and change as possible. I wanted to 0:01:56.080 --> 0:01:59.080 end the season by doing something that I've done the 0:01:59.160 --> 0:02:02.559 last two season, which is a ask me anything, bringing 0:02:02.600 --> 0:02:05.240 in my wonderful friend. All of you will know her 0:02:05.280 --> 0:02:08.960 by now, the one, the only, the very tall Genevieve Mohra, 0:02:09.200 --> 0:02:11.280 thank you, Hello, thank you for having me the giraffe. 0:02:11.320 --> 0:02:14.240 The draft. You are literally a draft. I'm literally like 0:02:14.280 --> 0:02:16.360 I just and people always say when they meet us 0:02:16.400 --> 0:02:18.840 in person, yep, they're like, they always think I'm taller 0:02:18.840 --> 0:02:20.560 than I am. They're like, you're very short, but you 0:02:20.639 --> 0:02:21.680 are very tall. 0:02:21.760 --> 0:02:22.720 Well, you're so tall? 0:02:22.800 --> 0:02:25.200 Yeah, you can't tell right now, obviously as we're sitting down, 0:02:25.320 --> 0:02:27.240 you are. You're a bab tall and I'm very stroked. 0:02:27.280 --> 0:02:29.640 I have you on here. I put up a question 0:02:29.680 --> 0:02:33.880 box that there was thousands of questions that came through. 0:02:34.480 --> 0:02:36.160 So we're not going to get to everyone's questions today, 0:02:36.200 --> 0:02:38.160 but we're going to do as many as we possibly can. 0:02:38.800 --> 0:02:41.960 There's one there I'm gonna say immediately caught my eye 0:02:42.760 --> 0:02:44.920 that we must start with, and then we can have 0:02:44.919 --> 0:02:47.079 a little of banter before we get really into the 0:02:47.240 --> 0:02:51.400 other ones. If you were a potato products, Brown's Hot Chips, 0:02:51.400 --> 0:02:52.720 et cetera, what would you be? 0:02:52.800 --> 0:02:55.480 And why there is such a story behind potatoes and 0:02:55.560 --> 0:03:00.799 jazz and I oh, oh, I'm gonna go with. 0:03:00.720 --> 0:03:01.320 The French fry. 0:03:01.760 --> 0:03:09.000 Why they're tall that long, crunchy on the outside, soft 0:03:09.040 --> 0:03:13.799 on the inside, If it loves a French fry not Yeah, 0:03:13.800 --> 0:03:14.720 but are you like a. 0:03:15.440 --> 0:03:17.680 Like a like a real skinny French fry or. 0:03:17.680 --> 0:03:21.000 Like a thick I'm a burger fuel French fry. Yeah, okay, 0:03:21.000 --> 0:03:23.239 so that's not a French fry. Oh that's it. 0:03:23.360 --> 0:03:25.080 I wouldn't call that a French fry because it's thick, 0:03:25.240 --> 0:03:27.640 hot chip, hot ship. That's what we call it in 0:03:27.639 --> 0:03:28.080 New Zealand. 0:03:28.160 --> 0:03:28.360 It is. 0:03:28.360 --> 0:03:30.520 It's a hot hot ship and then the thin ones 0:03:30.520 --> 0:03:32.799 a free Yeah, you're probably right, Yeah, a hot chip. 0:03:32.960 --> 0:03:34.720 I wanted. Yeah, I want to know the definition for 0:03:35.080 --> 0:03:37.600 Do Americans call it hot chips? No? No, what do 0:03:37.600 --> 0:03:41.920 they call it? Fries? All of them? It's very valiquisiou. 0:03:42.000 --> 0:03:45.160 They're not all fries. They're not what would you be. 0:03:46.760 --> 0:03:49.840 Mesh because that uh. 0:03:51.160 --> 0:03:54.160 Oh you know, no, I don't know. I mean I 0:03:54.560 --> 0:03:56.240 can't say fries because you've said fries. I feel like, 0:03:56.280 --> 0:03:59.200 obviously fries go with everything. What I do really love 0:04:00.360 --> 0:04:03.720 is like a stuffed potato. Yeah, I think I'll be 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:11.040 a stuffed potato one because I'm just full of it. 0:04:11.200 --> 0:04:12.240 I'm full of stuff. 0:04:12.960 --> 0:04:16.240 There's a lot, there's a lot going on. Yeah, you know, 0:04:16.920 --> 0:04:19.719 so I think I think I'll be a stuffed potato. 0:04:19.800 --> 0:04:22.520 I just love stuff with lots of fillings, lots of fillings. 0:04:22.520 --> 0:04:24.919 I do love stuff. Actually, now I'm hungry. Yeah, I 0:04:24.920 --> 0:04:26.920 mean I was hungry beforehand, but now I really just 0:04:26.960 --> 0:04:30.040 want potato. Before I get into a lot of other questions, 0:04:30.200 --> 0:04:31.040 how are you? How you doing? 0:04:31.080 --> 0:04:33.520 I'm good, I'm good. Is that time of the year 0:04:33.640 --> 0:04:35.880 it's all go? But no, I'm happy and healthy. And 0:04:35.920 --> 0:04:37.680 I need to say this because I can't stop staring 0:04:37.720 --> 0:04:38.880 at it. You've met your phone case? 0:04:39.640 --> 0:04:41.560 Oh my gosh, I do. It's the first thing that 0:04:41.640 --> 0:04:46.800 caught my eye. Case to five bounce cases. I'm a 0:04:46.800 --> 0:04:48.159 sucker for the sticky grips. 0:04:48.240 --> 0:04:50.800 Yeah, I need one, to give you one. 0:04:50.880 --> 0:04:52.200 I need to I need to give you more sticky 0:04:52.200 --> 0:04:55.880 grips lessons. If you didn't know, there's another one that 0:04:55.920 --> 0:04:57.880 I just saw here. If you were an animal, what 0:04:57.920 --> 0:05:02.520 would you be? And why? Well obvious I I've told 0:05:02.560 --> 0:05:05.719 the story so many times. Were in Kenya? This girl 0:05:05.880 --> 0:05:10.440 spotted a giraffe from literally like miles miles away and 0:05:10.520 --> 0:05:12.839 sprinted over at by the giraffe. 0:05:13.400 --> 0:05:16.320 We got scent, and we got someone adopted. How does 0:05:16.320 --> 0:05:18.200 that work? Adopted a draffe? Remember you got a sloth 0:05:18.240 --> 0:05:18.880 and I got draft. 0:05:19.600 --> 0:05:22.000 Yeah, I got a sloth man. This loss really for 0:05:22.120 --> 0:05:23.840 those of you who weren't here in the early days 0:05:23.920 --> 0:05:26.599 of when kind of we were first starting, and even 0:05:26.600 --> 0:05:28.919 on social media. For me, I one time said that 0:05:28.960 --> 0:05:31.160 I like sloths, and then suddenly I just got so 0:05:31.240 --> 0:05:32.480 much sloth stuff sent to me. 0:05:32.600 --> 0:05:34.680 And a few adopted sloths. I mean, I still do 0:05:34.880 --> 0:05:35.479 like sloths. 0:05:35.520 --> 0:05:38.120 I don't think that. I mean, I'm I'm you're be 0:05:38.160 --> 0:05:45.400 a dog. I like being at dog parks or like 0:05:45.520 --> 0:05:49.160 beaches is my favorite place in the entire world. Like 0:05:49.320 --> 0:05:57.560 I told the story, coming around the corner right, Oh 0:05:57.600 --> 0:06:00.960 my gosh, Okay, So where I used to live, we 0:06:01.000 --> 0:06:03.400 live right next to this dog park and we would 0:06:03.440 --> 0:06:05.280 go all the time, and I am the person was 0:06:05.400 --> 0:06:09.120 very obsisted with talks, and I talked to dogs, all 0:06:09.160 --> 0:06:11.839 of the dogs. And as we were walking into the park, 0:06:12.000 --> 0:06:14.200 I saw this dog and I had a little jacket on, 0:06:14.560 --> 0:06:18.080 and so I, without kind of plocking anything, go immediately 0:06:18.120 --> 0:06:21.120 and just go oh, that's a nice jacket to the 0:06:21.160 --> 0:06:25.520 dog in the exact tone, right, not realizing but first 0:06:25.560 --> 0:06:27.960 of all that there is a man who was also 0:06:28.040 --> 0:06:30.560 walking towards me and this dog in the jacket has 0:06:30.560 --> 0:06:33.279 gone behind a bush so you can no longer see. 0:06:33.360 --> 0:06:35.920 And this man is in like a like a rain 0:06:36.040 --> 0:06:38.400 jacket thing, and he just looks at me and is like. 0:06:39.920 --> 0:06:39.960 Y. 0:06:40.360 --> 0:06:42.599 And I made eyes with him like when I'm saying 0:06:42.640 --> 0:06:45.600 the word jacket, and so I'm like, that's a nice jacket. 0:06:46.040 --> 0:06:48.320 And I think this man is like to this day, 0:06:48.400 --> 0:06:49.480 I'm traumatized by it. 0:06:49.720 --> 0:06:51.800 Yeah, it's funny that dogs. I like, I'll walk down 0:06:51.839 --> 0:06:53.360 the beach and someone will come to pet my dog 0:06:53.400 --> 0:06:55.680 and I'll be like franky, say hi, Like she's gonna 0:06:55.720 --> 0:06:58.200 be like, yeah, oh hey mate, I'm. 0:06:58.120 --> 0:07:00.400 The same thing. I'm like, say, hey they leap talk. 0:07:00.480 --> 0:07:01.920 Oh no, but they I'm going to say hard on 0:07:01.960 --> 0:07:03.760 them all, every single one of them. I would one 0:07:03.800 --> 0:07:05.960 hundred percent be adult. Do you think dogs and dogs 0:07:07.839 --> 0:07:11.400 dogs and would be friends. I think so. I think 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:13.760 that'd be a little buddy. I mean we're friends. We're friends. Yeah, 0:07:14.120 --> 0:07:18.440 I'm like a tiny dog and you're a very tool. Okay. 0:07:19.520 --> 0:07:21.520 Like I said, we've got thousands of questions at having SMAD, 0:07:21.600 --> 0:07:22.720 so we're not going to spend too much time just 0:07:22.720 --> 0:07:26.640 bantering around. There is a whole lot that are covering 0:07:26.680 --> 0:07:29.960 a bunch of different topics, but one of them that 0:07:30.000 --> 0:07:32.200 I think is going to be quite prevalent. As a 0:07:32.200 --> 0:07:34.280 school You're here and alter it comes to an end. 0:07:34.360 --> 0:07:37.080 As someone has asked on tips for people leaving school, 0:07:38.320 --> 0:07:40.760 Oh do you have any? 0:07:41.720 --> 0:07:43.640 I think the one thing that comes to mind is 0:07:43.720 --> 0:07:47.080 to focus on your own journey. I think when I 0:07:47.200 --> 0:07:48.720 left school, a lot of my friends were going to 0:07:48.840 --> 0:07:51.320 university and I was at a very different place in 0:07:51.320 --> 0:07:53.560 my life having gone through my you know, my challenges 0:07:53.600 --> 0:07:55.600 as a teenager or a university just wasn't on the 0:07:55.640 --> 0:07:57.280 cards for me, and it wasn't something I was actually 0:07:57.280 --> 0:07:59.800 that interested in doing at that point, and I spent 0:07:59.800 --> 0:08:02.040 time sort of comparing myself, being like should I be 0:08:02.120 --> 0:08:02.560 doing this? 0:08:02.640 --> 0:08:03.120 Should you know? 0:08:03.280 --> 0:08:05.400 Is there a certain way to live life? And I 0:08:05.400 --> 0:08:08.960 think reminding yourself, especially if you've gone through trauma and 0:08:08.960 --> 0:08:11.200 gone through challenges as a teenager, that your life will 0:08:11.240 --> 0:08:13.960 look different and that's okay. Yeah, And to not compare 0:08:14.000 --> 0:08:16.440 yourself to other people. I think also be really proud 0:08:16.480 --> 0:08:18.120 of yourself. Finishing school is a big deal. 0:08:18.160 --> 0:08:22.280 I didn't finish school neither. Yeah. So first of all, 0:08:23.480 --> 0:08:27.760 if you're finishing school and you're like graduating graduate freaking nations. Yeah, 0:08:27.760 --> 0:08:31.080 because that's more than than I did. And I also 0:08:31.160 --> 0:08:32.720 think that, you know, coming off the back of everything 0:08:32.760 --> 0:08:34.840 that you've just said as well, is that you don't 0:08:34.880 --> 0:08:37.000 have to have it all forget out. There's so much 0:08:37.120 --> 0:08:41.199 pressure on teenagers, like pretty early on, you've got to 0:08:41.280 --> 0:08:42.800 know what you need to what you want to do 0:08:42.920 --> 0:08:44.040 for the rest of your life because you need to 0:08:44.120 --> 0:08:45.800 not subjects you have to take, and then if you 0:08:45.880 --> 0:08:48.040 don't take these subjects you can't get into university for this. 0:08:48.160 --> 0:08:51.640 Then there's so much pressure and it's so unnecessary because 0:08:52.160 --> 0:08:54.160 your brain is still developing. You don't know what you 0:08:54.240 --> 0:08:56.160 want to do. Some of you will well and you're 0:08:56.200 --> 0:08:57.880 gonna already you know, be on the path, but that's 0:08:57.920 --> 0:09:01.400 not the case for everyone. Give yourself some race. Yeah, 0:09:01.480 --> 0:09:04.280 be proud of yourself that you've done it and it's 0:09:04.320 --> 0:09:06.560 all good, you know. I don't compare yourself to your 0:09:06.559 --> 0:09:08.920 friends and what everyone else is doing, because I mean, 0:09:09.080 --> 0:09:11.520 my few years after high school was spent in hospital 0:09:12.840 --> 0:09:14.920 and so it's gonna look different for everyone. But yeah, 0:09:15.080 --> 0:09:18.560 just don't don't try rush yourself or yeah, compare it's 0:09:18.600 --> 0:09:19.800 probably he's still so young. 0:09:19.880 --> 0:09:22.400 I look back at like I thought I was so old, 0:09:22.440 --> 0:09:24.000 and I was like, your friend, you were a child. 0:09:24.080 --> 0:09:25.480 I really thought I thought I was so old. 0:09:26.440 --> 0:09:29.720 This question I want to see in a moment talking 0:09:29.760 --> 0:09:34.000 about this. Someone has asked how to stop missing the 0:09:34.200 --> 0:09:38.079 sick you? And this is something I think that is 0:09:38.240 --> 0:09:44.040 not discussed enough. When you battle so deeply with mental 0:09:44.080 --> 0:09:49.080 illness and the darkness, it can almost become a part 0:09:49.160 --> 0:09:51.800 of who you believe that you are, and it becomes 0:09:51.840 --> 0:09:54.360 your every day, it becomes your normalody. And when you 0:09:54.480 --> 0:09:59.040 start to heal from that, there is a whole process 0:09:59.360 --> 0:10:03.520 of grief this life that you kind of once knew. 0:10:03.600 --> 0:10:06.480 And I know that for me personally, I lived so 0:10:06.679 --> 0:10:10.400 much in the chaos, in the crisis of so much happening, 0:10:10.480 --> 0:10:13.960 the darkness, and when I didn't have that or when 0:10:13.960 --> 0:10:17.480 I was feeling okay, I didn't know how to deal 0:10:17.559 --> 0:10:20.079 with it, like I didn't know. And I think that 0:10:21.559 --> 0:10:23.080 for someone who grew up the way that I did 0:10:23.160 --> 0:10:27.120 and the kind of beliefs that I had, and feeling 0:10:27.320 --> 0:10:29.520 unlovable and like a burden and that kind of thing. 0:10:30.440 --> 0:10:33.199 Even you know the fact that when you're really unwell, 0:10:33.320 --> 0:10:36.160 sometimes people will come in and they'll help you and 0:10:36.200 --> 0:10:38.000 there's that kind of feeling to it as well, that 0:10:38.880 --> 0:10:42.640 it makes sense to miss the sick you because for 0:10:42.800 --> 0:10:45.400 so long that was part of your identity. That's all 0:10:45.480 --> 0:10:48.960 that you knew, and everything that you did was basically 0:10:49.160 --> 0:10:52.000 expecting and expecting that this is how things will always be. 0:10:52.440 --> 0:10:54.760 You didn't know that there would be anything different, and 0:10:56.360 --> 0:10:59.320 so I think, you know, for me, it was such 0:10:59.360 --> 0:11:03.880 a process of having to actively choose every day to 0:11:03.960 --> 0:11:07.439 stay in recovery and writing down lists of why, like 0:11:07.760 --> 0:11:10.959 being in recovery is so much better than being unwell, 0:11:11.000 --> 0:11:12.240 and like what are the things that I'm living for 0:11:12.440 --> 0:11:14.120 and what are the things that I now get to do, 0:11:14.360 --> 0:11:15.839 Like the fact I can go and walk down to 0:11:15.880 --> 0:11:17.760 a cafe. Couldn't do that when I was in the 0:11:17.800 --> 0:11:20.079 psyche board. Like, you know, that kind of thing was 0:11:20.120 --> 0:11:23.320 really big for me. But yeah, I just I don't 0:11:23.360 --> 0:11:25.960 think it's it's something that is really talked about hugely 0:11:26.040 --> 0:11:26.520 in this space. 0:11:26.559 --> 0:11:28.719 What about you, Oh, I completely agree with everything you've said. 0:11:28.760 --> 0:11:30.959 I think I kind of want to focus on what 0:11:31.000 --> 0:11:32.679 you said around and sort of the support people, and 0:11:32.760 --> 0:11:34.640 I think it's so important to be there for people, 0:11:35.200 --> 0:11:37.199 you know, not just when they're at their worst. But 0:11:37.280 --> 0:11:38.920 when they're best, you know they're at their best, because 0:11:38.920 --> 0:11:40.679 I think, like you said, when you're struggling, there can 0:11:40.720 --> 0:11:42.520 be these people, or if you're lucky enough, you have 0:11:42.559 --> 0:11:45.480 people that rally around you, and you can almost miss 0:11:45.559 --> 0:11:48.439 that aspect of having people there for you. And you 0:11:48.480 --> 0:11:50.079 don't need to be sick to have people there and 0:11:50.400 --> 0:11:52.280 love and care and support you. But I think a 0:11:52.320 --> 0:11:54.559 big thing that I've discussed a lot recently and I'm 0:11:54.640 --> 0:11:56.719 still trying to work through is the grief for the 0:11:56.800 --> 0:11:59.439 years that I lost to my illness. I think it 0:11:59.480 --> 0:12:01.520 affects me now than ever when I look back and 0:12:01.559 --> 0:12:03.640 I'm like, I'm thirty now, like I missed a good 0:12:03.760 --> 0:12:05.560 chunk of my teen years and I will never ever 0:12:05.679 --> 0:12:07.719 ever get back, and I'm mad about that, and I'm 0:12:07.800 --> 0:12:11.319 sad about that. But I saw something recently and I 0:12:11.360 --> 0:12:13.079 think I shared it all my socials around You know, 0:12:13.160 --> 0:12:14.880 you were surviving in the only way you knew how, 0:12:15.040 --> 0:12:16.840 and I think that's really important to remember. 0:12:16.960 --> 0:12:18.559 You can choose this. It's not your fault. 0:12:20.040 --> 0:12:22.320 It is understandable, and in many ways, if you missed 0:12:22.320 --> 0:12:24.199 that sick version of you, because like you said, it's 0:12:24.200 --> 0:12:24.440 all you. 0:12:24.440 --> 0:12:28.120 Knew in that moment. I also think I really want 0:12:28.160 --> 0:12:32.319 to take a moment to validate people that specifically young 0:12:32.400 --> 0:12:35.560 people that have been admitted into hospital with the mental 0:12:35.559 --> 0:12:39.680 illness into psychiatric wards. There's this common thing that happens 0:12:40.360 --> 0:12:42.280 and at the time it can be really confusing and 0:12:42.360 --> 0:12:44.560 you can get really angry about it where people want 0:12:44.600 --> 0:12:48.920 to stay in hospital, and that happens because, like you 0:12:49.120 --> 0:12:52.440 just said, that's where you feel you're heard. People understand 0:12:52.520 --> 0:12:54.760 that you're struggling. People are there that help. When you've 0:12:54.760 --> 0:12:56.480 got the nurses that are there that are there in 0:12:56.520 --> 0:12:58.439 your darkest moments and they're kind of helping you get 0:12:58.480 --> 0:13:01.480 through that. When you get out of that and suddenly 0:13:01.520 --> 0:13:04.120 it's you having to do this again, you can miss 0:13:04.800 --> 0:13:07.120 that that kind of full wrap around support of it. 0:13:07.240 --> 0:13:10.760 And you know, we both have been in psych wards ourselves, 0:13:10.800 --> 0:13:14.280 but also have been you know, we talk and hang 0:13:14.320 --> 0:13:18.080 out sometimes in the adolescent warden. You sometimes see those 0:13:18.240 --> 0:13:22.160 patterns of when things are getting bad again and you 0:13:22.200 --> 0:13:23.880 don't quite know how to ask for help, but you 0:13:24.000 --> 0:13:26.040 know that if you escalate, then I can end up 0:13:26.080 --> 0:13:28.440 back here and then people will know there are things 0:13:28.480 --> 0:13:30.920 that you can do. It doesn't have to be that way. 0:13:31.559 --> 0:13:33.640 And while you think that's the only place that you 0:13:33.720 --> 0:13:35.920 can get that love and support and feel heard and 0:13:35.960 --> 0:13:40.520 feel seen, it's not. And you know, been able to 0:13:40.880 --> 0:13:43.000 ask for help earlier before it gets to that point. 0:13:43.120 --> 0:13:47.679 And oh, it's just it breaks my heart knowing how 0:13:47.720 --> 0:13:49.559 much of a pattern that that can become, and knowing 0:13:49.559 --> 0:13:55.240 that was a pattern for me as well, that it's yeah, I. 0:13:56.080 --> 0:13:57.719 Know, I hear you, and I think I felt I 0:13:57.840 --> 0:14:02.640 completely relate to that. I felt at that time safe 0:14:02.760 --> 0:14:05.800 in the hospital. I felt really really safe and supported, 0:14:05.920 --> 0:14:08.640 and every time I was discharged, you know, part of 0:14:08.679 --> 0:14:10.240 my mind was like, how do I end up back 0:14:10.280 --> 0:14:12.800 here because this is where I feel, you know, like 0:14:12.920 --> 0:14:16.800 I get the support I need and I guess something 0:14:16.840 --> 0:14:18.839 that helped me. And again, you know, it wasn't always 0:14:18.840 --> 0:14:20.240 sort of easy listening to this, but I had to 0:14:20.320 --> 0:14:22.440 remind myself constantly that I couldn't live in hospital for 0:14:22.480 --> 0:14:24.280 either that at some point I was going to have 0:14:24.360 --> 0:14:28.520 to face that uncomfortable and work hard at home and 0:14:28.680 --> 0:14:29.640 break those patterns. 0:14:30.000 --> 0:14:32.760 I remember, we have talked a lot and you're kind 0:14:32.760 --> 0:14:34.560 of explaining it a lot to me as well, that 0:14:34.640 --> 0:14:38.640 specifically when it comes to eating disorders, that there becomes 0:14:38.720 --> 0:14:42.280 this mindset or there's almost goal to get into hospital 0:14:42.320 --> 0:14:44.160 because then people know that you're sick enough, or like 0:14:44.240 --> 0:14:46.800 you have to you know, lose a certain amount of 0:14:46.800 --> 0:14:48.600 weight or whatever it maybe you have to be sick enough. 0:14:48.800 --> 0:14:53.360 I'm not sick enough unless I'm there. Can you explain, like, 0:14:54.120 --> 0:14:56.880 talk to people who are struggling with eating disorders that 0:14:56.920 --> 0:14:58.960 are feeling like that, I'm not sick enough, I have 0:14:59.080 --> 0:15:01.800 to be sicker. What was you saying? 0:15:02.000 --> 0:15:04.840 Yeah, absolutely, I mean eing disorders are incredibly complex, and 0:15:04.880 --> 0:15:07.120 I think it's important to acknowledge that not everyone with 0:15:07.200 --> 0:15:10.720 an eating disorder. Actually a smaller proportion of people with 0:15:10.800 --> 0:15:14.880 an ending disorder are going to be medically diagnosed is underweight. 0:15:14.960 --> 0:15:16.400 It's a very small proportion. 0:15:16.600 --> 0:15:19.520 I think media and those sort of things portray an 0:15:19.560 --> 0:15:23.080 eing disorder in accurately that it's a very malnourished, unwell 0:15:23.160 --> 0:15:23.600 human being. 0:15:23.640 --> 0:15:25.040 And you said is a case for some people. 0:15:25.160 --> 0:15:27.240 But I think you know, there's as common belief as 0:15:27.280 --> 0:15:30.040 you said that, I've experienced myself, and I hear from 0:15:30.080 --> 0:15:32.440 lots of people I interact with around I'm not sick enough. 0:15:32.480 --> 0:15:34.240 And I think my message to people that feel that 0:15:34.560 --> 0:15:36.840 is that if you are struggling with your mind, your body, 0:15:36.960 --> 0:15:41.280 your self worth. You know, if you were struggling, you 0:15:41.400 --> 0:15:43.160 are sick enough. And I think something I had to 0:15:43.280 --> 0:15:45.200 learn is that nothing was ever going to be enough 0:15:45.200 --> 0:15:47.080 for my eating disorder. My eating disorder was not going 0:15:47.120 --> 0:15:49.920 to be happy until it was dead. The goalposts were 0:15:49.960 --> 0:15:52.720 going to keep on shifting, and so reminding yourself that 0:15:52.760 --> 0:15:54.880 you were worthy and deserving of help, that it's not 0:15:54.960 --> 0:15:59.200 a competition, that eating disorders aren't about. Look, it's a 0:15:59.320 --> 0:16:02.280 physical sorry, it's a mental illness is really really important 0:16:02.280 --> 0:16:02.760 to remember. 0:16:03.360 --> 0:16:05.880 Yep, it's I mean we see it now as well 0:16:06.000 --> 0:16:09.400 all the time, especially with social media and especially on 0:16:09.520 --> 0:16:12.000 tektok as well. There's just it can become such a 0:16:12.040 --> 0:16:14.560 competitive thing. And I'm so thankful we talk about this 0:16:14.680 --> 0:16:16.520 all the time, how thankful we are that social media 0:16:16.600 --> 0:16:20.920 didn't really exist and when we are unwow, because it's 0:16:21.000 --> 0:16:23.840 so hard to navigate it with that as well, and 0:16:23.920 --> 0:16:25.760 I think that can also add to that feeling of 0:16:26.120 --> 0:16:29.680 not being sick enough. And yeah, to just validate whether 0:16:29.720 --> 0:16:32.080 it's you know, with with any disorders or anything else 0:16:32.120 --> 0:16:35.120 that you're struggling with when you feel like you need 0:16:35.200 --> 0:16:38.080 to get help you, it's okay, it's acceptable to get help. 0:16:38.080 --> 0:16:39.840 At that point, you don't have to wait for stuff 0:16:39.880 --> 0:16:40.640 to hit the fane. 0:16:41.880 --> 0:16:43.880 And the deeper you go, the more you have to 0:16:43.920 --> 0:16:44.560 crawl out, you know. 0:16:46.200 --> 0:16:52.120 Dang girl, dang yeah, yeah, no, it's true, that's very true. 0:16:53.560 --> 0:16:56.040 This question here is another one that I get asked 0:16:56.120 --> 0:16:59.240 quite a bit. How to tell your parents about self harm? 0:17:01.400 --> 0:17:04.560 This is something that is so incredibly difficult for a 0:17:04.600 --> 0:17:07.240 lot of young people to do and to understand as well. 0:17:07.960 --> 0:17:09.480 I think that you know, I've done a few different 0:17:09.480 --> 0:17:12.400 episodes that have touched on self harm and how misunderstood 0:17:12.400 --> 0:17:14.840 it is and how people just think that it's attention seeking, 0:17:14.960 --> 0:17:18.520 but really you're just trying to cope with this pain 0:17:18.640 --> 0:17:22.719 that is inside. And the reality is is that, especially 0:17:22.760 --> 0:17:25.119 when it comes to the older generation, they might not 0:17:25.320 --> 0:17:29.119 understand that. But your parents love you, they want the 0:17:29.200 --> 0:17:32.200 best for you, and I think that being able to 0:17:32.480 --> 0:17:35.080 if you feel like you can't physically tell them, write 0:17:35.119 --> 0:17:38.000 it down. I'm a big advocate for writing it in 0:17:38.080 --> 0:17:41.359 a letter, say how you're feeling, and being able to 0:17:41.560 --> 0:17:43.600 articulate it as much as you can, because if you 0:17:43.680 --> 0:17:45.760 go straight into a conversation you can get jumbled, there 0:17:45.760 --> 0:17:48.119 can be a lot more emotions, and obviously the emotions 0:17:48.160 --> 0:17:50.040 are still going to calm, the conversations are still going 0:17:50.119 --> 0:17:56.560 to be had, and it's more important that someone knows 0:17:57.000 --> 0:18:00.920 what is going on than you being so afraid of 0:18:00.960 --> 0:18:04.800 the response. And you know, if your parent doesn't understand, 0:18:04.840 --> 0:18:07.120 there's also resources that you can point them to online. 0:18:08.240 --> 0:18:10.920 But this isn't something that you have to battle with alone, 0:18:11.119 --> 0:18:13.359 and it's not something that is going to have to 0:18:13.400 --> 0:18:14.920 stay with you for the rest of your life. But 0:18:15.000 --> 0:18:18.400 you do need help to get out of that. So yeah, 0:18:18.480 --> 0:18:20.960 to someone, speak to someone. Yeah, absolutely, I think it's 0:18:21.600 --> 0:18:24.919 it's just it's so important. Oh, Jen loves this one 0:18:24.960 --> 0:18:26.960 favorite quote. Loves a quote. Oh, I love a quote. 0:18:27.000 --> 0:18:30.399 Love a quote. I love a quote. I think you 0:18:30.840 --> 0:18:31.880 all know, Ma, I'm kidding you don't. 0:18:32.680 --> 0:18:34.439 Something I always say and was one of my biggest 0:18:34.560 --> 0:18:37.119 recovery motivators was the journey of a thousand miles begins 0:18:37.160 --> 0:18:40.520 with a single step. Something that I continue to remind 0:18:40.560 --> 0:18:42.920 myself or remind people, is that you're now doesn't have 0:18:43.000 --> 0:18:45.359 to be you forever. You know, things can change. Like 0:18:45.480 --> 0:18:48.119 Jazz says, change is possible. 0:18:47.920 --> 0:18:52.600 Hope is real, and change as possible. Oh my gosh, 0:18:52.600 --> 0:18:58.119 there's so many questions, guys. There's oh, this is interesting. 0:18:59.680 --> 0:19:02.720 How do you cope with getting the title of survivor? 0:19:03.320 --> 0:19:06.320 Recently got the title myself? Is what this person has said? 0:19:07.200 --> 0:19:07.480 This is? 0:19:08.440 --> 0:19:11.520 This is actually I wow, this is a really interesting 0:19:12.920 --> 0:19:16.920 question because I think, first of all, the shift from 0:19:17.200 --> 0:19:20.399 victim to survivor is huge as well, because that is 0:19:20.480 --> 0:19:23.480 also saying that this is not just like, this is 0:19:23.520 --> 0:19:25.960 something that happened to you, that you were a victim of, 0:19:26.520 --> 0:19:29.119 but now you were on the process of you like, 0:19:29.240 --> 0:19:32.800 you freaking survived it. Whatever it was that happened to you, 0:19:33.680 --> 0:19:36.560 you survived it, You got through it, and that is 0:19:36.600 --> 0:19:41.160 a testament to your strength. And none of that, though, ever, 0:19:41.480 --> 0:19:45.200 justifies what happened. I think that anyone who is a 0:19:45.280 --> 0:19:47.680 survivor of any form of trauma, we always hear that 0:19:47.760 --> 0:19:50.520 whole thing of like, your trauma makes you stronger, you're 0:19:50.560 --> 0:19:53.560 a survivor, you're so much. We didn't ask to be traumatized, 0:19:53.560 --> 0:19:55.720 We didn't need to be stronger, like, we didn't ask 0:19:55.800 --> 0:19:58.720 for that, we didn't ask to be a survivor. But 0:19:59.160 --> 0:20:02.080 I think those moments being able, you can be angry, 0:20:02.400 --> 0:20:06.240 you can be frustrated. You can feel everything about what 0:20:06.440 --> 0:20:10.440 happened to you while or so accepting the fact that 0:20:10.800 --> 0:20:13.160 this has happened. We can't go back and change the past. 0:20:13.240 --> 0:20:17.040 What we can do is change our responses, our emotions 0:20:17.080 --> 0:20:20.640 and behaviors to make sure that what happened doesn't define 0:20:20.720 --> 0:20:23.359 us going forward and doesn't have to have that grip 0:20:23.440 --> 0:20:26.000 on us. And I also think survivor is such an 0:20:26.040 --> 0:20:30.200 empowering thing as well, Like you, you survived it, You 0:20:30.400 --> 0:20:34.200 did that. Yeah, be freaking proud. Is there anything you 0:20:34.240 --> 0:20:34.760 want to say to that? 0:20:34.960 --> 0:20:36.880 No, it's a really I mean, it's a great It's 0:20:36.880 --> 0:20:39.439 a complex question. I think I went through a period 0:20:39.520 --> 0:20:42.760 of you know, my trauma is different there in terms 0:20:42.800 --> 0:20:44.480 of you know, expect to that ED disorder and OCD, 0:20:44.640 --> 0:20:47.520 and it has been quoted in articles, you know, even 0:20:47.560 --> 0:20:51.560 disort of survivor, and personally, I don't feel connected necessarily 0:20:51.640 --> 0:20:52.640 to the survivor word. 0:20:52.760 --> 0:20:56.000 And you know, I don't know. It's a complex one. 0:20:56.480 --> 0:21:00.720 That's really interesting because I remember reading your hospital files 0:21:00.760 --> 0:21:03.680 with you, and I have read a lot more. I 0:21:03.760 --> 0:21:06.080 guess details of what has gone public and gen you're 0:21:06.080 --> 0:21:09.680 eating just order nearly killed you like you. That's like 0:21:11.080 --> 0:21:15.080 you survived one of the most deadly mental illnesses. Like 0:21:16.119 --> 0:21:20.359 that's like I think that, I think that people often 0:21:20.400 --> 0:21:26.680 associate survivor survivor with a traumatic event. But that's it's 0:21:26.720 --> 0:21:28.600 interesting that you feel you don't connect to that, because 0:21:28.600 --> 0:21:30.440 that's I think you should take a moment to go 0:21:31.119 --> 0:21:34.280 christ like you did. You survived because you did the 0:21:34.359 --> 0:21:40.160 work and that thing it literally nearly killed you, like it. Yeah, 0:21:40.359 --> 0:21:44.320 I'm I'm just gonna let you. I need to sit 0:21:44.359 --> 0:21:46.320 with that. And I think, no, you're completely right. I 0:21:46.720 --> 0:21:49.840 did survive, and I think it's not only that I thrived. 0:21:49.960 --> 0:21:51.639 You know, why do you think the word survivor makes 0:21:51.680 --> 0:21:54.680 you feel uncomfortable for you for your journey? 0:21:54.760 --> 0:21:56.880 No, this is a great question, and instantly what comes 0:21:56.920 --> 0:21:58.440 to mind, and I would be the first person to 0:21:58.720 --> 0:22:00.880 shut someone down that said this is it doesn't feel 0:22:03.400 --> 0:22:05.320 I don't know if I feel worthy of that title, 0:22:07.840 --> 0:22:10.359 which is you know, and you've just broken it down 0:22:10.440 --> 0:22:15.840 for me is so interesting because how, yeah, I survived, 0:22:16.880 --> 0:22:17.480 Yeah you did. 0:22:19.560 --> 0:22:23.200 Like you think of like nineteen year old gen who 0:22:23.320 --> 0:22:25.600 is doing also for you with OCD all of these 0:22:25.720 --> 0:22:30.240 rituals and stuff, but like for me, literally reading those 0:22:30.320 --> 0:22:34.159 hospital notes there were moments where you didn't want to 0:22:34.240 --> 0:22:38.080 wake up, but also that you physically, if you kept going, 0:22:38.280 --> 0:22:40.760 it would have claimed your life. You literally survived one 0:22:40.760 --> 0:22:42.879 of the most deadly mental illnesses that there is, and 0:22:42.920 --> 0:22:44.480 I think you need to give yourself more credit for that. 0:22:45.680 --> 0:22:52.600 But I also think this is really interesting because there 0:22:52.720 --> 0:22:56.240 is so much stuff around around being a survivor being 0:22:56.320 --> 0:22:59.160 tied to traumatic events and that it's not big enough 0:22:59.200 --> 0:23:01.000 where it's not bad. And I literally just had this 0:23:01.119 --> 0:23:03.680 conversation real with Brie, which was on the last episode 0:23:03.720 --> 0:23:06.840 of this podcast. I remember when she told me about 0:23:06.920 --> 0:23:10.280 her traumatic event that she went through where she was kidnapped. 0:23:10.920 --> 0:23:12.399 Well not sorry, she wasn't. Oh my god, let me 0:23:12.480 --> 0:23:14.600 reword that she was not. She was she was threatened 0:23:14.600 --> 0:23:18.119 to be kidnapped. And when she first told me the story, 0:23:18.680 --> 0:23:20.560 she was like, oh, but it's not like as bad 0:23:20.600 --> 0:23:23.320 as what you'd been and I was like, I was. 0:23:23.560 --> 0:23:25.800 I was shocked, and I was like, oh my gosh, 0:23:25.920 --> 0:23:28.680 this is nuts. But there's so much comparison that can 0:23:28.760 --> 0:23:31.639 happen of like, well it wasn't as bad as this, 0:23:31.880 --> 0:23:36.920 or yes it was, yes it was well, and for 0:23:37.080 --> 0:23:39.159 you and your experience and your life and what you 0:23:39.240 --> 0:23:41.879 went through it was And I think that happens all 0:23:41.920 --> 0:23:44.440 the time when it comes to like any kinds of 0:23:44.520 --> 0:23:46.399 trauma of like, well it wasn't as bad as this 0:23:46.600 --> 0:23:48.000 or like but and you were like yeah it was. 0:23:48.119 --> 0:23:50.520 Yeah for you it was yeah, you're right. You can't 0:23:50.560 --> 0:23:53.720 compare trauma. No. Well, thank you to the person that 0:23:54.160 --> 0:23:54.880 asked that question. 0:23:55.160 --> 0:23:58.200 I'm going to just be driving home about this, like, wow, 0:23:58.960 --> 0:24:00.639 that was uponto that. 0:24:00.760 --> 0:24:03.440 But thank you. That was a yeah, what a beautiful question. Yeah, 0:24:03.680 --> 0:24:09.760 Oh my goodness, this is a good question for you. Okay, 0:24:10.280 --> 0:24:12.280 how do you handle public speaking anxiety? 0:24:12.440 --> 0:24:12.560 Oh? 0:24:13.320 --> 0:24:16.720 Wow, this is a great question for me. 0:24:17.200 --> 0:24:19.920 I do more of more of it, more public speaking 0:24:20.000 --> 0:24:22.159 than you know, I've probably ever done, you know, And 0:24:22.280 --> 0:24:24.240 I think having jazz lead the way has been really 0:24:24.320 --> 0:24:27.200 helpful for me. I think someone said something to me once, 0:24:27.280 --> 0:24:29.320 you know, you get nervous because you care, Like every 0:24:29.359 --> 0:24:30.920 time I go out and speak, I want to do 0:24:31.000 --> 0:24:33.240 a good job. I want someone to take something for it. 0:24:33.880 --> 0:24:35.879 I you know, have this in a critic and you know, 0:24:35.920 --> 0:24:37.760 I don't think I'm again it's that worthy thing. 0:24:37.800 --> 0:24:38.360 I'm good enough. 0:24:38.440 --> 0:24:40.120 How dare you stand up on the stage and tell 0:24:40.240 --> 0:24:43.560 these teenagers, you know what helped you through your struggles, 0:24:43.640 --> 0:24:45.600 and you know, is it bad enough? And is anyone 0:24:45.640 --> 0:24:47.440 going to relate to that story? And again that's something 0:24:47.480 --> 0:24:49.560 I continue to work on. But I think it's one 0:24:49.560 --> 0:24:51.640 of those things. And I learned this throughout my journeys, 0:24:51.760 --> 0:24:54.679 is that exposure piece. Right, the more you do something, 0:24:55.080 --> 0:24:57.879 the less scary it becomes. And so it's putting myself 0:24:57.920 --> 0:25:00.680 in those uncomfortable positions, and she trying to flip the 0:25:00.760 --> 0:25:02.440 narrative and be like, how lucky am I that I 0:25:02.520 --> 0:25:06.240 get to share my experience and hopefully help someone. 0:25:06.400 --> 0:25:08.840 Yeah, I love that, And I think you know, a 0:25:08.840 --> 0:25:10.440 lot of people wouldn't have seen them behind the scenes 0:25:10.480 --> 0:25:11.840 for you. But like you used to have to write 0:25:11.840 --> 0:25:14.359 everything down word for word on a piece of paper 0:25:14.400 --> 0:25:17.359 before you spoke, and I wouldn't sleep for like three weeks. 0:25:17.720 --> 0:25:19.720 And now she can just get up and just talk. 0:25:20.800 --> 0:25:22.639 And I think that really does come from that, like 0:25:22.880 --> 0:25:25.119 knowing you're you know the purpose of what you're speaking. 0:25:25.200 --> 0:25:27.080 But even if people when it comes to like school 0:25:27.080 --> 0:25:30.640 speeches and stuff like that, the big thing that still 0:25:30.720 --> 0:25:33.600 really helps me and it counts can sound really cliche. 0:25:33.960 --> 0:25:36.400 And you'll know this with with your battles with anxiety, 0:25:36.400 --> 0:25:39.960 as well as the box breathing techniques. I've breathing for four, 0:25:40.280 --> 0:25:42.359 hold for four, out for four, hold for four. This 0:25:42.520 --> 0:25:44.560 is something that even some of your top athletes will do. 0:25:45.480 --> 0:25:47.880 When people are at the peak of the performance. People 0:25:47.920 --> 0:25:51.000 are still doing that to calm their nerves down. And 0:25:51.119 --> 0:25:56.840 while I personally don't get anxious speaking anymore, weirder only 0:25:56.920 --> 0:25:59.159 because I've done it five million times, I did get 0:25:59.240 --> 0:26:01.000 very nervous when I had to go after someone bias. 0:26:02.240 --> 0:26:04.400 It was, oh my goodness, and I was in high 0:26:04.600 --> 0:26:07.480 heels and then my earring dropped off in the stage. 0:26:07.840 --> 0:26:11.480 Lad read of the title wrong. Oh my gosh. Yes, 0:26:12.160 --> 0:26:14.960 there's also this one time. Okay, I want to tell 0:26:15.000 --> 0:26:16.600 the story, and I really hope that you're okay with 0:26:16.680 --> 0:26:22.000 it from me. So the reason this actually came up 0:26:22.080 --> 0:26:23.639 is that I was listening to the radio the other 0:26:23.720 --> 0:26:26.720 day and Flick Thwna Haley, who hosts the breakfast show 0:26:27.280 --> 0:26:29.800 for ZIM. We're talking about mispronouncing words and like when 0:26:29.840 --> 0:26:31.440 that's been an issue for you, And there was this 0:26:31.560 --> 0:26:34.399 one time that we were speaking in a intermediate school 0:26:34.600 --> 0:26:36.760 and there's a bunch of like very young kids there right, 0:26:36.840 --> 0:26:39.440 and Gina's getting up. She's getting real confident at this point, 0:26:39.520 --> 0:26:42.200 she's speaking her little heart out, and then she's starting 0:26:42.240 --> 0:26:44.200 to talk about tools, and at one point she stops 0:26:44.640 --> 0:26:56.200 and she says, just grab your tit. I wanted to 0:26:56.320 --> 0:26:58.720 crawl into a ball. I'm standing on the side of 0:26:58.760 --> 0:27:01.080 the stage, catch her out the side of my eye. 0:27:01.160 --> 0:27:03.200 Go And so basically what I was trying to say 0:27:03.359 --> 0:27:06.159 is this breathing technique where you squeeze your fists. So 0:27:06.240 --> 0:27:08.560 I think I was saying, just squeeze your fist, but 0:27:08.640 --> 0:27:10.639 I said squeeze your tits. 0:27:11.080 --> 0:27:13.840 And then I was like, I need to go home. 0:27:14.840 --> 0:27:19.920 It was the funniest thing, no, And thankfully I think 0:27:19.960 --> 0:27:21.240 it went over most of their heads, but. 0:27:21.280 --> 0:27:26.560 I just the teachers. But I want to I want 0:27:26.560 --> 0:27:28.760 to share that because we've all had. We've all had, 0:27:29.760 --> 0:27:32.800 I've said a couple of times, and now I'm so 0:27:33.000 --> 0:27:39.560 cautious when I say it. It was I don't know 0:27:39.640 --> 0:27:41.119 it was a school or a corporate conference. It may 0:27:41.160 --> 0:27:43.760 have been a corporate conference. And I was talking about 0:27:43.800 --> 0:27:46.679 the whole concept of it, start surviving, start fighting. 0:27:46.680 --> 0:27:46.760 And. 0:27:48.720 --> 0:27:52.120 Shot chart to short surviving you know what a shot? 0:27:55.760 --> 0:27:57.879 And then I just couldn't like trying to recover from that, 0:27:57.960 --> 0:27:58.119 and so. 0:27:58.359 --> 0:28:00.200 That happens, and you actually taught me something because I'd 0:28:00.240 --> 0:28:02.240 often like if I fumble my words while I'm talking, 0:28:02.440 --> 0:28:04.280 They're like sorry, and you like, stop saying sorry because 0:28:04.280 --> 0:28:05.000 it makes more obvious. 0:28:05.480 --> 0:28:08.880 Just continue faked, you make it? This is I feel 0:28:08.960 --> 0:28:12.280 like this All of these questions are making me really 0:28:12.400 --> 0:28:16.359 ponder a lot of things this person has said. Is 0:28:16.400 --> 0:28:19.960 the reason we can't love ourselves because of other people's actions? 0:28:20.119 --> 0:28:24.239 Or is that selfish to say that other people are 0:28:24.240 --> 0:28:30.160 the reason that we can't love ourselves? It's dang, I'm 0:28:30.240 --> 0:28:36.359 going to say. I'm going to say, I want to 0:28:36.359 --> 0:28:39.520 say yes. To be honest, I think I'm not gonna 0:28:41.880 --> 0:28:44.680 What I will say from personal experience is that a 0:28:44.760 --> 0:28:47.280 lot of my time, like for me, my inability to 0:28:47.520 --> 0:28:51.360 love myself has come from a mixture of things that 0:28:51.480 --> 0:28:55.360 has come from not getting that when I was super 0:28:55.440 --> 0:28:57.719 young growing up. And if I can't be loved by 0:28:58.000 --> 0:29:00.480 those who are supposed to love me, then why what 0:29:00.680 --> 0:29:04.360 I be? It came from trauma, it came from bullying, 0:29:04.440 --> 0:29:08.080 it came from all of that. And then see this 0:29:08.120 --> 0:29:09.560 is funny because then I say, and then it also 0:29:09.680 --> 0:29:12.560 came from the things that I did and my reactions. 0:29:12.600 --> 0:29:14.440 And that also, I like, because I would hate myself 0:29:14.560 --> 0:29:17.440 for certain things with ways that I would cope were, 0:29:18.280 --> 0:29:20.600 especially when I was constantly kind of that crisis mode 0:29:20.680 --> 0:29:23.440 or feeling like I had to make something up to 0:29:23.520 --> 0:29:26.320 be to still you know, feel momentary love or things 0:29:26.360 --> 0:29:28.280 like that. And then when I go back to the 0:29:28.400 --> 0:29:33.560 core of that, those behaviors, those responses, those things that 0:29:33.640 --> 0:29:38.040 I couldn't love myself because of was a response to 0:29:38.160 --> 0:29:42.640 the things that happened to me. Yeah, and the things 0:29:42.680 --> 0:29:47.040 that are going on in the world, And I think that, yeah, 0:29:47.080 --> 0:29:50.600 I don't think that's something that is like, you're not 0:29:50.840 --> 0:29:53.840 born hating yourself. No, you're not born with an inability 0:29:53.880 --> 0:29:58.120 to love yourself. No, And then no, I completely hear you. 0:29:58.160 --> 0:30:00.440 And then I look at my situation and where I 0:30:00.560 --> 0:30:02.400 was so privileged and I am so privileged to have 0:30:02.480 --> 0:30:05.959 been surrounded and so much love, Like there wasn't anything 0:30:06.040 --> 0:30:10.480 external that made me feel Did you. 0:30:10.480 --> 0:30:12.520 Ever feel like you didn't love yourself, well, that you 0:30:12.560 --> 0:30:13.400 couldn't love yourself? 0:30:14.440 --> 0:30:17.960 I think it was probably that came as part of 0:30:18.040 --> 0:30:23.800 my experience, you know, through more specifically tied to my 0:30:23.880 --> 0:30:24.520 eating disorder. 0:30:24.520 --> 0:30:28.160 I don't think it was something I experienced apart from 0:30:28.240 --> 0:30:35.120 that different for everyone. Yeah, that's man, that some of 0:30:35.160 --> 0:30:38.440 these questions are are good. I mean I have like 0:30:38.480 --> 0:30:40.200 a million answers. As soon as I leave here, I 0:30:40.320 --> 0:30:42.920 feel it. Oh my god, I've just seen for those 0:30:42.960 --> 0:30:45.200 of you who listened to zenim Ross boss, who is 0:30:45.240 --> 0:30:47.680 the boss of zenim Networks? Do you know the muffin Man? 0:30:48.160 --> 0:30:50.760 Do you know? Do you know the muffin Man? The 0:30:50.840 --> 0:30:53.400 Muffin Man, the Muffin Man? Do you know them? Man 0:30:53.440 --> 0:30:55.200 who lives on Dreury Lane? How do you deal with 0:30:55.280 --> 0:30:55.960 online bullies? 0:30:56.440 --> 0:30:56.640 Oh? 0:30:57.000 --> 0:31:01.640 You get more of these? And that is not an invitation, girl, 0:31:01.720 --> 0:31:03.600 and I will cry. Yeah. I mean I've been getting 0:31:03.640 --> 0:31:06.440 bullied on the engineer since I was in Bibo days, 0:31:07.720 --> 0:31:11.240 and I mean to be I don't think i'd shared 0:31:11.280 --> 0:31:19.320 the story red so oh man, people that I went 0:31:19.320 --> 0:31:22.560 to high school are going to absolutely girl me for this. 0:31:22.800 --> 0:31:26.960 But so when I was younger, when we were younger, 0:31:27.000 --> 0:31:28.800 there was this app that a lot of you probably 0:31:28.800 --> 0:31:31.160 won't know. It wasn't even an app, it was a website, Bbo. 0:31:31.720 --> 0:31:34.360 We all had Bibo. Exactly what you're gonna say, yeah, 0:31:34.360 --> 0:31:36.680 and back on Bebo, there was a thing where you 0:31:37.000 --> 0:31:40.520 could have someone as your other half, and everyone had 0:31:40.560 --> 0:31:43.240 someone as your other half. I didn't have any friends, 0:31:44.320 --> 0:31:49.520 and so I just made a random faced it so 0:31:49.720 --> 0:31:53.000 that I could for them. Do you remember their name? No? No, 0:31:53.960 --> 0:31:55.000 I don't remember at all. 0:31:55.200 --> 0:31:57.160 Bibo was the worst. I would have your other half 0:31:57.200 --> 0:32:00.280 and you'd have your top five or ten, the fight 0:32:00.320 --> 0:32:01.040 with someone at school, and. 0:32:01.040 --> 0:32:01.680 They'd move down this. 0:32:01.840 --> 0:32:03.720 Oh my gosh, you can move them down, change them 0:32:03.760 --> 0:32:04.440 as much as you want to. 0:32:04.640 --> 0:32:06.320 I was convinced. I was having a conversation with Ashley 0:32:06.360 --> 0:32:10.400 Tidstar once on me anyway. To go back to the 0:32:11.720 --> 0:32:14.520 question online police, that's it is something that you know, 0:32:14.560 --> 0:32:18.360 I've experienced since before I kind of got the profile 0:32:18.440 --> 0:32:20.640 that I do now, and I definitely deal with it 0:32:20.680 --> 0:32:23.440 a lot better than I used to. I think that 0:32:23.520 --> 0:32:25.280 the block button is the most powerful thing that you 0:32:25.360 --> 0:32:29.520 could possibly have. I think that, you know, for me, 0:32:30.160 --> 0:32:32.280 what I've learned as well is that what you don't 0:32:32.360 --> 0:32:35.280 see can't hurt you. So I try to not actively 0:32:35.440 --> 0:32:38.600 seek out some of the you know that kind of 0:32:38.640 --> 0:32:41.200 stuff and and do block it as fast as I can. 0:32:41.280 --> 0:32:43.560 And I think that's hard when it comes to people 0:32:43.640 --> 0:32:45.680 that are in school and you're kind of having to 0:32:45.720 --> 0:32:48.480 go face to face with his people every day. But 0:32:49.560 --> 0:32:52.800 I think also talking to people is so powerful and 0:32:54.200 --> 0:32:58.200 reporting it, reporting it like it's not when when you 0:32:58.280 --> 0:33:01.040 know your parents were at school, they would get bullied 0:33:01.040 --> 0:33:02.800 at school and then come home and it would not 0:33:02.960 --> 0:33:04.680 follow them home or as now it doesn't. Mis seeing 0:33:04.720 --> 0:33:07.760 case after case after case of that. Especially you know, 0:33:07.800 --> 0:33:10.280 we've seen a string of suicides in Australia of these 0:33:10.360 --> 0:33:13.640 young kids that have been bullied online and I think 0:33:13.680 --> 0:33:16.400 I hate snapchat. I hate it because it also gets 0:33:16.480 --> 0:33:18.840 rid of all of the evidence of stuff that happened. 0:33:18.840 --> 0:33:21.200 As well, kids use it as an excuse. We used 0:33:21.240 --> 0:33:24.040 to do things like ask if him or like those 0:33:24.120 --> 0:33:25.160 anonymous things, but. 0:33:25.200 --> 0:33:28.440 You'd put one up on your own platform and then like, no, 0:33:28.560 --> 0:33:29.200 you're going to get. 0:33:29.120 --> 0:33:32.360 Bullied do it? Just yeah? Terrible. Yeah. I think my 0:33:32.400 --> 0:33:34.520 biggest piece of advice is what other people say about 0:33:34.560 --> 0:33:36.280 you does not define who you are. It does not 0:33:36.360 --> 0:33:38.479 define your self worth at all. The people who are 0:33:38.520 --> 0:33:40.880 closest to you know you, they love you for who 0:33:40.920 --> 0:33:45.880 you are, and block report you don't have to stand 0:33:45.920 --> 0:33:48.560 for it. And also if you see it happening, and 0:33:48.680 --> 0:33:50.240 you're not the one being bullied, or you're not the 0:33:50.880 --> 0:33:53.080 bully themselves. If you see it happening, you have a 0:33:53.120 --> 0:33:56.560 responsibility as well to jump in this issue. We cannot 0:33:56.640 --> 0:33:59.680 be the people that we see these kids that are 0:33:59.760 --> 0:34:02.080 dying suicide, and then we're posting going, oh my gosh, 0:34:02.120 --> 0:34:03.800 you have to stand up to bullying, Oh my gosh, 0:34:04.720 --> 0:34:06.840 And then you're seeing other people get bullied and you're 0:34:06.840 --> 0:34:08.759 not doing anything about it because you don't want to 0:34:08.840 --> 0:34:12.040 step on toes or you don't know. This is everyone's 0:34:12.080 --> 0:34:14.799 responsibility and if we want to see this issue change, 0:34:15.200 --> 0:34:17.960 it's not just on the victims. Yeah, no, I completely 0:34:18.000 --> 0:34:18.360 hear you in that. 0:34:18.440 --> 0:34:20.520 And I think something that's been really sort of opening 0:34:20.560 --> 0:34:22.400 to me is the fact that there's websites that literally 0:34:22.560 --> 0:34:25.680 literally exists to bully people online. And I think the 0:34:25.760 --> 0:34:27.759 way that I try and frame it is I actually 0:34:27.800 --> 0:34:29.319 look at that and I just go, that is so sad, 0:34:29.640 --> 0:34:31.560 the fact that people take time out of their day, Like, 0:34:31.680 --> 0:34:34.960 how low and how unhappy must they be to go 0:34:35.400 --> 0:34:40.000 and take time to type on a website awful things 0:34:40.000 --> 0:34:42.480 about other people. Yeah, Like, I just really unfortunately think 0:34:42.520 --> 0:34:44.799 that's potentially a reflection of them and what they're going through. 0:34:44.960 --> 0:34:47.440 Yeah. Yeah, I also think it's a reflection of society 0:34:47.480 --> 0:34:49.040 that we think it's okay, like when you think of 0:34:49.400 --> 0:34:51.800 back of like even all the women's magazines and stuff. 0:34:52.120 --> 0:34:54.719 I think New Zealand's a bit better with that. But 0:34:54.840 --> 0:34:56.200 all the American minds that you grow up with, all 0:34:56.200 --> 0:34:58.880 the gossip forum gossip forums like you grow up with 0:35:00.200 --> 0:35:03.320 be eight people like criticism and bullying is normal and 0:35:03.400 --> 0:35:06.480 it shouldn't be, and it's yeah, it's got to stop. 0:35:06.680 --> 0:35:10.040 It's so insane. I like this question. If you had 0:35:10.160 --> 0:35:12.360 one minute of everyone's attention in the entire world, what 0:35:12.400 --> 0:35:15.919 would you tell them? And you only had one minute 0:35:15.920 --> 0:35:18.000 to tell them? Oh my goodness. 0:35:18.800 --> 0:35:21.120 I needed these questions prior to this. 0:35:22.719 --> 0:35:24.600 I already asked last night, and there's so many that 0:35:24.680 --> 0:35:27.400 have come through that are just like, oh my goodness, 0:35:29.480 --> 0:35:31.400 Oh my gosh, I feel. 0:35:31.160 --> 0:35:32.840 Like I'm going to miss important stuff and then be like, 0:35:32.840 --> 0:35:33.279 why did I do? 0:35:33.440 --> 0:35:39.840 I mean, I would say I think I say the 0:35:39.920 --> 0:35:43.000 same thing everywhere that I go because for me, this 0:35:43.160 --> 0:35:46.400 is my purpose in life. And before I get up 0:35:46.440 --> 0:35:50.200 on any stage, before I direct any campaign, any show, 0:35:50.400 --> 0:35:54.399 write any book, is that at the end of each 0:35:54.480 --> 0:35:57.480 of those things, I want everyone to know that no 0:35:57.600 --> 0:35:59.879 matter what it is that they're facing, hope is real 0:36:00.080 --> 0:36:02.719 and change is possible. And that's why this podcast is 0:36:03.360 --> 0:36:07.040 named Hope is Real. But I think that we underestimate 0:36:07.239 --> 0:36:11.279 the power of hope and that no matter what it 0:36:11.400 --> 0:36:16.160 is that you are going through, things can change. Because 0:36:16.160 --> 0:36:18.920 I think that's where we lose majority of our people, 0:36:19.040 --> 0:36:23.120 is that they just they there's no ability for them 0:36:23.160 --> 0:36:25.839 to ever see change. And sometimes you can be living 0:36:25.880 --> 0:36:28.200 in it for so many years it is so it 0:36:28.280 --> 0:36:30.640 feels impossible to see that. I was in it for 0:36:30.760 --> 0:36:36.360 nine years. But yeah, I would say, hold on, hold on, 0:36:37.000 --> 0:36:39.560 hope is so freaking real and change is possible. 0:36:39.600 --> 0:36:41.400 You've just got to be here to see it. What 0:36:41.440 --> 0:36:42.640 would you say? And the world is better with you 0:36:42.760 --> 0:36:47.440 and you. Gosh, there's so many things I want to say. 0:36:47.440 --> 0:36:48.920 The first things that come to mind is that you 0:36:49.000 --> 0:36:51.560 are not the exception to healing. I think I talk 0:36:51.600 --> 0:36:53.800 to people every single day that are like, yeah, but 0:36:53.880 --> 0:36:54.200 that's you. 0:36:54.400 --> 0:36:55.040 I can't do that. 0:36:55.480 --> 0:36:57.719 We've had the privilege of meeting so many incredible people 0:36:57.800 --> 0:37:00.160 through our work and through sharing our own stories, have 0:37:00.320 --> 0:37:03.839 healed and that have found peace after you know, their 0:37:04.040 --> 0:37:07.080 their battles, and I think it's really important to remember 0:37:07.160 --> 0:37:09.440 that you are capable. You're stronger than you even know, 0:37:09.719 --> 0:37:11.320 and I think I really want to validate that. I 0:37:11.400 --> 0:37:14.279 know it's incredibly exhausting. I know it's daunting, I know 0:37:14.400 --> 0:37:17.080 it's overwhelming. I know that sometimes it feels like it 0:37:17.080 --> 0:37:19.440 would be easier just to stay the same and stay. 0:37:19.280 --> 0:37:20.080 Where you are now. 0:37:20.560 --> 0:37:23.520 But I can promise you from my experience, from the 0:37:23.600 --> 0:37:26.239 amount of people I've spoken to, that no one ever 0:37:26.320 --> 0:37:28.440 regrets healing. It'll be the best thing you ever do 0:37:28.560 --> 0:37:29.120 for yourself. 0:37:29.360 --> 0:37:30.280 And you're not alone. 0:37:30.840 --> 0:37:32.920 And as Jazz said, or as I said for Jazz, 0:37:33.360 --> 0:37:34.520 the world is better with you in it. 0:37:36.480 --> 0:37:40.160 That's that I need to write that out. Put it 0:37:40.200 --> 0:37:41.799 on a T shirt. Well, don't ask me saying again, 0:37:41.800 --> 0:37:45.480 because put it on Oh my goodness, that's no. I 0:37:45.560 --> 0:37:48.279 really love that. And you know, there's there's so many 0:37:48.400 --> 0:37:50.160 there's so many questions that I want to get to 0:37:50.280 --> 0:37:54.400 and I can see, you know how much people are 0:37:54.560 --> 0:37:56.440 There's so many different things that people are struggling with. 0:37:56.600 --> 0:38:00.360 And we have the honor and the privilege of just 0:38:00.480 --> 0:38:02.359 being a part of what we get to do when 0:38:02.400 --> 0:38:04.480 we get to be honest and open. And I actually 0:38:04.520 --> 0:38:08.040 laugh the other day when I was sharing the full 0:38:08.120 --> 0:38:10.720 story of the whole Stalker situation because the laws finally 0:38:10.719 --> 0:38:13.080 getting past it, Stalker was becoming a leader. Yeah, And 0:38:13.160 --> 0:38:15.360 someone commented and said, oh my god, there's almost so 0:38:15.520 --> 0:38:17.960 much drama on your page, no offense, And I just 0:38:18.000 --> 0:38:20.520 sat there and I was like, that's because I have 0:38:20.960 --> 0:38:24.800 the honor and the privilege of sharing everything that happens. 0:38:24.880 --> 0:38:27.880 Most people don't do that. Yep. Most people only present 0:38:28.000 --> 0:38:30.279 one side of themselves or you know, So it does 0:38:30.360 --> 0:38:34.680 feel like there's always drama, but that's because I'm just sharing, yeah, 0:38:34.800 --> 0:38:36.400 you know, and seve of the times, it's like stoff 0:38:36.480 --> 0:38:38.040 having two years ago that I'm a talking. 0:38:37.840 --> 0:38:40.000 About now, but completely it's almost like that, being like 0:38:40.360 --> 0:38:41.480 you're always so vulnerable. 0:38:41.800 --> 0:38:45.359 Yeah, someone, It's another question that we get asked a lot, 0:38:45.400 --> 0:38:47.799 but I want to see if you've got any any 0:38:47.920 --> 0:38:50.440 new answers to it. As we're beginning to slowly wrap up, 0:38:50.800 --> 0:38:52.200 there's so many more questions I want to get to. 0:38:52.200 --> 0:38:54.800 I'm going to sew many weeks squeeze in, but what 0:38:55.040 --> 0:38:58.320 is a moment for you that has stood out in 0:38:58.400 --> 0:39:01.480 the recent years of like why you keep doing this? 0:39:02.280 --> 0:39:04.600 What it's like your proudest I don't want to there, 0:39:04.640 --> 0:39:06.120 those are two different questions. I don't want see your 0:39:06.120 --> 0:39:07.439 brand's a team in. Yeah, I want to say, what's 0:39:07.480 --> 0:39:09.239 like a moment for you that has stood out to 0:39:09.280 --> 0:39:11.439 you in this advocacy work where you've gone, Oh my gosh, 0:39:11.440 --> 0:39:14.840 I'm making a difference. Oh my goodness. 0:39:18.320 --> 0:39:21.640 I had a moment recently where I was in the 0:39:21.760 --> 0:39:25.600 car park at Newmarket Mall and a dad came up 0:39:25.640 --> 0:39:28.439 to me and said, thank you for writing your book. 0:39:29.640 --> 0:39:32.880 Isaac was with me, and he sat me down. Afterwards 0:39:32.920 --> 0:39:34.279 he goes, do you know what a big deal that is? 0:39:34.600 --> 0:39:36.600 That dad walked over to you. His daughter was standing 0:39:36.600 --> 0:39:39.719 there and she looked like she was just didn't want 0:39:39.719 --> 0:39:40.879 to have anything to do with me in that moment, 0:39:41.080 --> 0:39:44.000 which is fine. But yeah, I think that was a 0:39:44.080 --> 0:39:46.239 moment where I went because the book writing journey was 0:39:46.280 --> 0:39:50.879 so vulnerable and so scary, but also to know even 0:39:50.960 --> 0:39:53.360 if it just helt that one dad, yeah, that it 0:39:53.440 --> 0:39:53.959 helps someone. 0:39:55.080 --> 0:39:55.880 That was cool for me. 0:39:58.320 --> 0:40:00.120 So that's kind of more, I guess a personal one 0:40:00.280 --> 0:40:02.919 something that I love. So I run support groups every 0:40:03.040 --> 0:40:05.520 fortnight and they've been running for sort of four or 0:40:05.560 --> 0:40:08.480 five years now, and they eating to sort of support 0:40:08.560 --> 0:40:11.479 groups and throughout those years, and it happened recently someone 0:40:11.520 --> 0:40:14.520 messaged me saying they're pregnant, and I just was like, 0:40:14.719 --> 0:40:17.080 how freaking cool is this? And I understand not everyone 0:40:17.120 --> 0:40:18.640 wants to have a baby, but I think if you've 0:40:18.680 --> 0:40:20.320 been through an eating disorder, you know the damnage it 0:40:20.360 --> 0:40:22.239 does have on your baby, on your on your baby, 0:40:22.520 --> 0:40:25.840 on your body, and those moments, I'm like to have 0:40:25.960 --> 0:40:27.600 been part of your journey, even. 0:40:27.440 --> 0:40:31.080 If it was this small, it was so freaking cool. Yeah. Yeah, 0:40:31.760 --> 0:40:34.480 I don't even feel like I can put it down 0:40:34.600 --> 0:40:40.120 to one moment. There's so many, so many moments where 0:40:40.640 --> 0:40:43.960 it just reminds me why I'm doing it. And I 0:40:44.080 --> 0:40:48.640 think that, you know, for me, last year was so hard, 0:40:50.040 --> 0:40:53.880 and there were so many points where I considered stopping 0:40:54.080 --> 0:40:56.080 all of this. I mean stopping in general, but so 0:40:56.200 --> 0:40:58.799 many times I consider stopping this all. And even when 0:40:58.840 --> 0:41:02.280 the stalker situation happened and the conversations around taking everything 0:41:02.320 --> 0:41:05.239 offline and not like, you know, because there was so 0:41:05.360 --> 0:41:08.040 much fear around it, but then just looking back at 0:41:08.560 --> 0:41:11.160 all of these different interactions and going, holy grab this 0:41:11.320 --> 0:41:15.000 is why and I think, yeah, I mean I have 0:41:15.280 --> 0:41:18.640 it is the parents always get me. I was speaking 0:41:18.840 --> 0:41:21.560 at an event in Tasmania that I was about to 0:41:21.560 --> 0:41:24.880 say recently, and that was wild Festival because it's in 0:41:24.960 --> 0:41:28.719 a different country, but I just remember this mother coming 0:41:28.840 --> 0:41:32.520 up with their child and the moms just bawling her 0:41:32.560 --> 0:41:35.560 eyes out and just is like saying thank you, thank you, 0:41:35.640 --> 0:41:38.840 thank you again, like my kid is here. Because of 0:41:38.920 --> 0:41:41.080 the fact that you guys are so open with your stories, 0:41:41.280 --> 0:41:45.279 and that's that happened as well, like a few years 0:41:45.320 --> 0:41:47.520 ago at a different conference, I was speaking and it's 0:41:47.640 --> 0:41:52.360 something that for me when you see that impact and 0:41:52.440 --> 0:41:57.080 you see people choosing hope, everything else doesn't matter. The 0:41:57.200 --> 0:42:02.200 haters don't matter, the fear of putting yourself online doesn't matter, 0:42:02.560 --> 0:42:07.440 like nothing else matters, because these people are finding hope 0:42:07.520 --> 0:42:09.880 and it's so cool that you get to just be 0:42:10.000 --> 0:42:13.000 this tiny little part of it. And I want to 0:42:13.040 --> 0:42:17.399 emphasize that that's what it is like people. And I've 0:42:17.440 --> 0:42:18.880 told other's a lot that people will be like, oh, 0:42:19.160 --> 0:42:22.320 like Jas and Gin, you saved my life and we 0:42:22.600 --> 0:42:26.800 did not save you. When you say that someone or 0:42:26.880 --> 0:42:29.799 something saved your life, You were the one that chose 0:42:29.920 --> 0:42:32.279 to stay. You were the one that chose to listen 0:42:32.320 --> 0:42:34.040 to them. You were the one that chose to take 0:42:34.080 --> 0:42:36.480 the opportunity of hope that was presented to you and 0:42:36.600 --> 0:42:38.600 run with it. You were the one that did all 0:42:38.719 --> 0:42:41.399 of the hard work. All that we do is go, hey, 0:42:42.120 --> 0:42:45.600 there's hope, and then there's counselors who go, hey, here's 0:42:45.680 --> 0:42:48.360 some things that you can practically do, and there's family 0:42:48.400 --> 0:42:50.319 hook hey will be around you. But at the end 0:42:50.360 --> 0:42:54.000 of the day, it's your decision. And that for me 0:42:54.239 --> 0:42:59.440 seeing people choose to fight and choose to stay, Oh, 0:43:00.200 --> 0:43:02.400 every time I can, I completely understand. 0:43:02.440 --> 0:43:04.799 Then I think you know, and I think I learned 0:43:04.840 --> 0:43:06.600 that from you because I get comments like that, being 0:43:06.640 --> 0:43:08.600 like you saved my life. No, you saved your life. 0:43:08.880 --> 0:43:10.520 And it's such an honor and a privilege to have 0:43:10.560 --> 0:43:11.640 been a small part of that journey. 0:43:11.719 --> 0:43:15.680 Yeah, tiny part, it's a tiny part. Yeah. 0:43:15.760 --> 0:43:19.520 I get incredibly inspired by the people within our communities. 0:43:20.719 --> 0:43:22.840 It's a pretty unique position to be in where you 0:43:22.920 --> 0:43:27.120 are interacting or seeing the most resilient human beings on 0:43:27.160 --> 0:43:27.880 a daily basis. 0:43:28.360 --> 0:43:31.239 And we, I mean, we love all of you, like 0:43:31.600 --> 0:43:34.399 so much, and we see you. We know so many 0:43:34.440 --> 0:43:36.200 of you by names. We talk about it. I know, 0:43:36.320 --> 0:43:37.880 we literally do. We talk about you. We stalk you, 0:43:38.200 --> 0:43:41.480 not in the illegal sense, but you know we I 0:43:41.600 --> 0:43:45.719 cannot even say how much we appreciate this platform that 0:43:45.760 --> 0:43:48.080 you've allowed us to give to share our stories. Like 0:43:48.200 --> 0:43:51.480 we get to do this because you trust us, You 0:43:51.640 --> 0:43:56.319 trust the advice that we give, you, trust the way 0:43:56.400 --> 0:43:59.359 that we're able to speak. And I don't think I'll 0:43:59.400 --> 0:44:01.960 ever ever take that for granted. Like there's some of 0:44:02.040 --> 0:44:04.760 you that we see a whole bunch of different events 0:44:04.800 --> 0:44:07.600 that we go to, and I've seen a few times 0:44:07.640 --> 0:44:10.160 he'll be like, I don't want to be annoying. No, No, 0:44:10.400 --> 0:44:13.359 this is every reason that we do it, and it's 0:44:13.400 --> 0:44:15.839 every reason that we jump on and we go through 0:44:15.880 --> 0:44:18.080 crazy traffic to come and record a podcast and then 0:44:18.120 --> 0:44:20.440 we go and you know, we're so thankful to be 0:44:20.520 --> 0:44:24.200 able to do it, and it's yeah, it's everything. I 0:44:24.320 --> 0:44:28.320 completely agree. Hey, first, we all Jen, thank you so 0:44:28.440 --> 0:44:30.520 much for it coming on and closing out another season 0:44:30.760 --> 0:44:33.560 of Hope is Real the podcast, And again, thank you 0:44:33.600 --> 0:44:36.200 guys so much for hanging out with me this season 0:44:36.280 --> 0:44:39.000 and for the seasons beforehand. Like I said earlier. If 0:44:39.000 --> 0:44:41.959 there is anything that you've messed or you haven't listened 0:44:41.960 --> 0:44:44.800 to an episode, please go back listen. And as always, 0:44:45.080 --> 0:44:47.200 if anything in this episode or any of the questions 0:44:47.239 --> 0:44:50.840 that we were speaking to has brought up anything for you, 0:44:51.040 --> 0:44:54.120 please no. Remember that the best thing that you can 0:44:54.200 --> 0:44:55.879 do is to ask for help, and if you don't 0:44:55.880 --> 0:44:57.440 know how to do that, if there's not anyone in 0:44:57.520 --> 0:44:59.640 your direct world that you feel like you can talk to, 0:45:00.040 --> 0:45:02.319 there are helplines that exist all around the world as well. 0:45:02.760 --> 0:45:05.520 You can go here in altaioa once even three seven 0:45:05.600 --> 0:45:08.080 is an amazing helpline. We've got youth line, or if 0:45:08.120 --> 0:45:09.800 you live overseas, got a dub dub dub dot the 0:45:09.920 --> 0:45:12.600 Voices of Hope dot org. There's a list of international 0:45:12.680 --> 0:45:15.640 helplines on there as well. But thank you guys so 0:45:15.800 --> 0:45:18.200 much for hanging out with me this season. It's been 0:45:18.239 --> 0:45:21.480 an absolute honor and a privilege, and I will see 0:45:21.520 --> 0:45:21.879 you soon.