1 00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:02,320 Speaker 1: The Heads Podcast Network. 2 00:00:08,119 --> 00:00:10,879 Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to Slow It Down. I'm your host, 3 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:13,280 Speaker 2: PJ Harding, and I want this to be a place 4 00:00:13,320 --> 00:00:15,640 Speaker 2: where you can come hang out on the weekend, relax, 5 00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:19,599 Speaker 2: reflect and tap into ways of getting through tough times. 6 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:21,919 Speaker 2: There's so much noise in the world. We have more 7 00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:26,000 Speaker 2: information than ever and we're all so overstimulated. I want 8 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:27,560 Speaker 2: to strip it back, get to the core of what 9 00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:29,960 Speaker 2: it means to be a human will discovering beautiful and 10 00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:33,400 Speaker 2: simple ways to stay sane in the chaos. No judgment, 11 00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:37,279 Speaker 2: just a safe and inspiring space where hopefully you can 12 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:40,480 Speaker 2: catch up with your week's laundry. This week on the show, 13 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:44,000 Speaker 2: I am joined by someone that a lot of New 14 00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:47,720 Speaker 2: Zealanders will be well familiar with, Matilda Green. She obviously 15 00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:50,280 Speaker 2: came onto the scene in twenty fifteen when she entered 16 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:54,120 Speaker 2: the first season of New Zealand's The Bachelor, and she 17 00:00:54,200 --> 00:00:56,400 Speaker 2: was one of the lucky ones. She ended up actually 18 00:00:56,480 --> 00:01:00,600 Speaker 2: finding love and going on to marrying Art. The two 19 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:05,360 Speaker 2: have now got three beautiful children, living semi rurally outside 20 00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:08,319 Speaker 2: of the big smoke of Auckland and Warkworth. And I've 21 00:01:08,319 --> 00:01:11,080 Speaker 2: always really looked up to Matilda. I think she is 22 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:14,160 Speaker 2: a beautiful role model. She's always been really open about 23 00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:18,360 Speaker 2: prioritizing health and I wanted to tap into her brain 24 00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:21,720 Speaker 2: this week because obviously there's a lot going on. She's 25 00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:25,000 Speaker 2: got three kids, she's working, she's got a podcast, and 26 00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:28,360 Speaker 2: I just wanted to know her survival tips and tricks 27 00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:31,640 Speaker 2: and how you can thrive in the season that she's 28 00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:35,880 Speaker 2: currently in. I hope you enjoy the chat. Matilda Green 29 00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:39,760 Speaker 2: is joining me for Sloight Down. How are you doing? 30 00:01:41,120 --> 00:01:44,520 Speaker 1: I'm so good. I'm sitting here in my lounge. It's 31 00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:47,800 Speaker 1: like a grade rizzly day and got my baby Penny 32 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 1: beside me, who is just going to be passed over 33 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:54,240 Speaker 1: to act. But I feel very calm and just so 34 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:55,000 Speaker 1: excited for this. 35 00:01:56,440 --> 00:02:00,040 Speaker 2: Is calm like a common state of mind for you, 36 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:03,200 Speaker 2: as a mum of three, podcaster and all around probably 37 00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:04,639 Speaker 2: quite busy woman. 38 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:10,560 Speaker 1: I think I work really hard to bring the calm, 39 00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:12,280 Speaker 1: if you know what I mean. Like, if I didn't 40 00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:16,160 Speaker 1: put that work in to bring the calm, then it 41 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:19,040 Speaker 1: would be chaos. So I know that that's a really 42 00:02:19,040 --> 00:02:22,600 Speaker 1: big priority for me, is to set aside time for 43 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:25,679 Speaker 1: meditation and different bits and bobs, just so I can 44 00:02:25,760 --> 00:02:29,679 Speaker 1: be in a calm space when things are going to shit? 45 00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:30,280 Speaker 1: Can I say shit? 46 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,040 Speaker 2: Absolutely? You can say all of the shits and all 47 00:02:33,080 --> 00:02:35,519 Speaker 2: of the pities, you know. 48 00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:38,920 Speaker 1: When things are really going crazy. Then I know that 49 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:41,519 Speaker 1: I am not going to get dragged into it emotionally, 50 00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:42,160 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. 51 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:44,640 Speaker 2: Okay, so we'll get more into like the rituals and 52 00:02:44,680 --> 00:02:48,040 Speaker 2: things you like to do, son, but paint us the 53 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:51,679 Speaker 2: picture of your general weake like your week days, in 54 00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:53,440 Speaker 2: your weekend. How does that kind of look at the moment. 55 00:02:54,639 --> 00:02:58,119 Speaker 1: So it's very fluid. I was telling a friend about 56 00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:01,440 Speaker 1: this recently, actually, about how so many of mine and 57 00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:03,400 Speaker 1: arts conversations are around logistics. 58 00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:07,160 Speaker 2: Oh my god, can we just shut up so sexy? 59 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:11,960 Speaker 2: I know, with your logistics? 60 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:15,120 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, like what are you doing Monday afternoon? Because 61 00:03:15,160 --> 00:03:17,480 Speaker 1: I'm going to be out and who's gonna look after pennies? 62 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:21,720 Speaker 1: So it's just very much who's doing what, what's your 63 00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:24,520 Speaker 1: week looking like? What's my week looking like? And who's 64 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:27,920 Speaker 1: picking up dropping off? That sort of thing. But in 65 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:31,880 Speaker 1: a general week, So I do like pick up and 66 00:03:31,919 --> 00:03:34,720 Speaker 1: drop off for the older two preschool four days a week, 67 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,560 Speaker 1: and then Penny's home with me, and then all kids 68 00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:40,240 Speaker 1: are home on a Wednesday. So can you hear about 69 00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:41,680 Speaker 1: crushing in the background? So about that? 70 00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:44,320 Speaker 2: Ant's just hey, look, we're thriving in the chaos. This 71 00:03:44,440 --> 00:03:47,080 Speaker 2: is what it's all about. What's he doing? 72 00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:49,920 Speaker 1: He is in the kitchen ap currently. 73 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:53,240 Speaker 2: Oh my god, how stress red nose. 74 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:57,560 Speaker 1: It's actually this is okay because it's it's a cosmetic 75 00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:02,120 Speaker 1: reg ok so there's no like removing of big parts 76 00:04:02,120 --> 00:04:04,600 Speaker 1: of the house or anything. So it's okay. But yeah, 77 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:07,080 Speaker 1: poor Art, he's he's he's said it bit on with 78 00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:10,920 Speaker 1: trying to get this done with three kids around. Yea, yeah, 79 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:12,880 Speaker 1: And so that's that's sort of how it looks. And 80 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:17,560 Speaker 1: on the weekend we prioritize family time and we're going 81 00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:20,680 Speaker 1: to a lot of birthday parties. That's pretty common. Yeah, 82 00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:23,800 Speaker 1: I'm just doing fun stuff. We'd like, go for cool hikes, 83 00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:26,479 Speaker 1: go to the beach, do lots of different things. I 84 00:04:26,520 --> 00:04:28,120 Speaker 1: go to the library during the week with Penny, we 85 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:32,000 Speaker 1: do wriggle and rhyme. You know, that's really what we're 86 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,000 Speaker 1: doing on a weekly base. 87 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:37,760 Speaker 2: Are you quite rigid with routine or are you do 88 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:40,080 Speaker 2: you kind of like organized chaos or do you roll 89 00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:42,839 Speaker 2: the flow? What sort of works best? For you. 90 00:04:44,279 --> 00:04:46,280 Speaker 1: I always thought that I would be a go with 91 00:04:46,360 --> 00:04:49,040 Speaker 1: the flow hype of mum, because that's how I am 92 00:04:49,400 --> 00:04:52,200 Speaker 1: usually as a person. I don't do a lot of planning. 93 00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:57,440 Speaker 1: But I've found it's really hard to thrive in chaos, 94 00:04:57,680 --> 00:04:59,520 Speaker 1: and it makes my life so much easier when I 95 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:01,480 Speaker 1: have some sort of structure. So I try and plan 96 00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:03,880 Speaker 1: it out on a Sunday how the week's going to look, 97 00:05:03,920 --> 00:05:08,360 Speaker 1: and loosely what we're gonna do, And oh my god, 98 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:10,080 Speaker 1: it makes such a big difference when I can plan 99 00:05:10,120 --> 00:05:12,360 Speaker 1: out meals. I know what the plan is for the week, 100 00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:15,640 Speaker 1: and but but I don't. I think I've learned after 101 00:05:15,640 --> 00:05:19,159 Speaker 1: having three kids now that you can't be too rigid 102 00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:20,240 Speaker 1: in your plans. 103 00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:23,040 Speaker 2: Because anything could happen constantly. 104 00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:26,240 Speaker 1: Someone's got a fever, or someone's just like I don't 105 00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:29,159 Speaker 1: want to do that. So you know, there's there's a 106 00:05:29,160 --> 00:05:33,760 Speaker 1: bit of movement in the in the in the routine. 107 00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:36,920 Speaker 1: But yeah, it helps me a lot to have structure. 108 00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:38,839 Speaker 1: It makes me feel like I'm somewhat in control. 109 00:05:39,279 --> 00:05:41,320 Speaker 2: I am exactly the same way. I always thought I 110 00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:43,880 Speaker 2: was a happy, go lucky, spontaneous person who didn't need 111 00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:46,679 Speaker 2: no routine, And like now, I'm working with the toddler, 112 00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:52,440 Speaker 2: and I actually I need it. My brain just I 113 00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:56,080 Speaker 2: can't contain my brain otherwise and there's just constant noise 114 00:05:56,640 --> 00:05:59,719 Speaker 2: and chaos, and I just I've realized I have to 115 00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:01,600 Speaker 2: and the meals ahead. Like I never thought i'd be 116 00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:04,640 Speaker 2: a whelproper, you know, I have to have that Sunday. 117 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:09,039 Speaker 2: The Sunday I need dedicated to feeling like I'm getting 118 00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:09,679 Speaker 2: on top of shirt. 119 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:13,520 Speaker 1: It's key, it's yeah, And how are you finding me 120 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:14,360 Speaker 1: back on the tools? 121 00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:21,279 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's initially a real emotional juggle, but I feel 122 00:06:21,279 --> 00:06:24,120 Speaker 2: like the more you do it, the more it just 123 00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:26,840 Speaker 2: feels like normal. But God, you feel so out of 124 00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:28,840 Speaker 2: sorts at the beginning, especially when like these briastfeeding in 125 00:06:28,839 --> 00:06:31,640 Speaker 2: the max or whatever. Your brain's just not there. But 126 00:06:31,720 --> 00:06:35,400 Speaker 2: I think the more time you spend at work kind 127 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:37,680 Speaker 2: of doing your thing, it kind of just becomes more normal. 128 00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:41,039 Speaker 2: But it was definitely a real awkward dance at the beginning, 129 00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:45,359 Speaker 2: and that guilt because my mom is looking after Charlie, 130 00:06:45,560 --> 00:06:48,920 Speaker 2: who's nearly two, like all the time, which which is 131 00:06:48,960 --> 00:06:50,480 Speaker 2: a lot, you know, even though she's like, I love 132 00:06:50,520 --> 00:06:54,479 Speaker 2: it and hurt. My grandmother did that for me it's 133 00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:58,120 Speaker 2: really special, really special, but it's probably not sustainable long term. 134 00:06:59,760 --> 00:07:02,520 Speaker 2: We're going to have to give a danger. But no, 135 00:07:02,600 --> 00:07:05,039 Speaker 2: it is really nice. But but yeah, the mum girl 136 00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:08,840 Speaker 2: and all that definitely look loves to cray on every 137 00:07:08,839 --> 00:07:10,800 Speaker 2: now and then. But I want to talk about your 138 00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:12,720 Speaker 2: rattuels that you were talking about, that are sort of 139 00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:17,480 Speaker 2: your non negotiables that you know, when that chaos does come, 140 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:21,240 Speaker 2: those waves decide to roll on in. You know that 141 00:07:21,280 --> 00:07:22,880 Speaker 2: it's going to help you at big time. So what 142 00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:24,520 Speaker 2: how does that look for you? 143 00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:28,720 Speaker 1: My meditation practice is really important to me. So I 144 00:07:29,560 --> 00:07:34,880 Speaker 1: learned vade meditation through Georgi of Ebbsat and honestly, I'm 145 00:07:34,960 --> 00:07:38,240 Speaker 1: just so grateful that I did that. So I did 146 00:07:38,280 --> 00:07:42,360 Speaker 1: that I think four years ago when I was how 147 00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:46,080 Speaker 1: Milo must have been around one. So yeah, my oldest 148 00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:49,840 Speaker 1: Milo was around one and and I got the practice. 149 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:53,760 Speaker 1: And it's been really difficult to bring it into a 150 00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:58,320 Speaker 1: daily routine, really hard. There's no sugarcoating it. It's when 151 00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:00,800 Speaker 1: people are like, oh, just you know, make sure you 152 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:03,480 Speaker 1: do it, set aside the time, first thing in the morning. 153 00:08:03,680 --> 00:08:07,880 Speaker 1: It is hard for kids and some days I just 154 00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:12,200 Speaker 1: don't get to it. But I really feel a difference. 155 00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:15,840 Speaker 1: I just find that, you know, when sometimes you lose 156 00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:18,640 Speaker 1: you shit as at much. And hey, some listeners might 157 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:21,240 Speaker 1: be like, I can't really how auld are you? No? 158 00:08:21,240 --> 00:08:23,800 Speaker 2: No, no, the fuse the short fuse is a real thing. 159 00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:27,800 Speaker 1: Yeah. But I find that when I'm prioritizing that meditation practice, 160 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:31,640 Speaker 1: I'm like way further away from that breaking point, so 161 00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:33,360 Speaker 1: like I can still get there where I'm just like 162 00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:36,320 Speaker 1: it's too much, I've lost my shit, but it's it 163 00:08:36,400 --> 00:08:38,360 Speaker 1: takes a lot more for me to get there, so 164 00:08:38,400 --> 00:08:41,560 Speaker 1: I've got a lot more bandwidth. And so the meditation 165 00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:45,160 Speaker 1: practice is the first one, and the second one is 166 00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:50,120 Speaker 1: music and dance. I love music, I always have and honestly, 167 00:08:50,320 --> 00:08:52,480 Speaker 1: if I can just put on some music and just 168 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:55,000 Speaker 1: vibe out in the kitchen for five to ten minutes, 169 00:08:55,679 --> 00:09:01,240 Speaker 1: it makes such a difference. And like prioritizing fun as well, 170 00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:06,640 Speaker 1: because sometimes when things are just crazy, kids are getting 171 00:09:06,679 --> 00:09:09,400 Speaker 1: on my left, it it's just like all too much. 172 00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:11,440 Speaker 1: Like if I can just be like, do you know what, 173 00:09:11,559 --> 00:09:13,800 Speaker 1: I'm just going to lean in and we're just going 174 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:15,760 Speaker 1: to be real silly and have a great time and 175 00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:18,400 Speaker 1: let's just trash the house and have fun and I'm 176 00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:23,160 Speaker 1: going to deal with it later. That's been really like 177 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:24,839 Speaker 1: I know it doesn't sound like much, but that has 178 00:09:24,880 --> 00:09:28,000 Speaker 1: been a changer for me to just lean into the fun, 179 00:09:28,280 --> 00:09:30,720 Speaker 1: you know, like that that's all kids want to do. 180 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:33,080 Speaker 1: It's their first priority are And I always laugh about 181 00:09:33,080 --> 00:09:34,800 Speaker 1: it that, like they get up in the morning and 182 00:09:34,800 --> 00:09:36,960 Speaker 1: they're like, what am I going to do today? Have fun? 183 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:39,080 Speaker 1: And that's all they want to do. 184 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:42,400 Speaker 2: It's beautiful, and we just. 185 00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:45,720 Speaker 1: Try and lean in. Just do it, have fun, be silly, and. 186 00:09:45,720 --> 00:09:48,040 Speaker 2: It's all about how you make them feel. And you know, 187 00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:49,600 Speaker 2: looking back, it's not going to be all the things 188 00:09:49,640 --> 00:09:51,080 Speaker 2: that you had or all the things you know that 189 00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:53,280 Speaker 2: you were focused on. It was actually on how you 190 00:09:53,320 --> 00:09:55,160 Speaker 2: made them feel. So if you're bringing fun, I think 191 00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:58,600 Speaker 2: that's everything. I always find that there's a playlist. It 192 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:01,280 Speaker 2: was actually my birthday playlist. It's got like lots of 193 00:10:01,320 --> 00:10:03,880 Speaker 2: like really like wholesome tricks like the Verve, but a 194 00:10:03,880 --> 00:10:08,960 Speaker 2: sweet symphony, you know, just tracked. Honestly, I'll put that 195 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,240 Speaker 2: playlist on and it just brings me back to what 196 00:10:11,280 --> 00:10:13,520 Speaker 2: really matters. I'll be, you know, having a moment and 197 00:10:13,520 --> 00:10:15,640 Speaker 2: then I just put that on and I'm like life 198 00:10:15,679 --> 00:10:17,679 Speaker 2: is beautiful. I'm really grateful. 199 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:20,920 Speaker 1: Like how music can do that again, brings you back 200 00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:23,520 Speaker 1: to the moment you're like, oh, this doesn't. 201 00:10:23,240 --> 00:10:26,080 Speaker 2: Matter no once your go to or do you mix 202 00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:27,480 Speaker 2: it up? Ah? 203 00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:33,040 Speaker 1: I really mix it up. My Spotify is all over 204 00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:33,439 Speaker 1: the show. 205 00:10:33,760 --> 00:10:35,160 Speaker 2: I am a real. 206 00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:40,559 Speaker 1: Classic rock kind of fan. But then just everything, truly everything, 207 00:10:40,679 --> 00:10:42,959 Speaker 1: Like if I'm gonna it depends on the mood I'm in, 208 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:47,400 Speaker 1: Like if I'm feeling kind of like melancholy, i might 209 00:10:47,440 --> 00:10:49,800 Speaker 1: put on a little bit of like Nasy star. 210 00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:51,240 Speaker 2: Oh yeah. 211 00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:55,920 Speaker 1: Like that, yeah, that sort of thing. And then if 212 00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:58,160 Speaker 1: I'm feeling like I want to tackle the day, you 213 00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:04,400 Speaker 1: might do like Queen m Michael Jackson. Controversial but you 214 00:11:04,440 --> 00:11:05,840 Speaker 1: know that that sort of thing. 215 00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:08,760 Speaker 2: So just to that whole Michael Jackson thing, I feel 216 00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:11,240 Speaker 2: like the world's closed over that. The last couple it 217 00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:13,080 Speaker 2: was real controversial and now everyone was like, I just 218 00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:14,120 Speaker 2: like his music. 219 00:11:15,960 --> 00:11:22,280 Speaker 1: Always, so people are like Boycott like Tacon I mean, 220 00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:24,040 Speaker 1: I do like that song. I'm just gonna play it 221 00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:25,319 Speaker 1: the once today. 222 00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:31,600 Speaker 2: Oh dear, Now, look looking at your life from the outside, 223 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:33,920 Speaker 2: a lot of people would say you've got a lot 224 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:37,079 Speaker 2: of gifts, you know, like you're very lucky and you've 225 00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:40,839 Speaker 2: got a beautiful life. Do you ever fall victim to 226 00:11:41,040 --> 00:11:43,040 Speaker 2: the grass's green and mentality? You wish that you know 227 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:44,640 Speaker 2: things are a little bit different, You wish that you 228 00:11:44,679 --> 00:11:48,000 Speaker 2: were doing this or that, And because leaks be honest, 229 00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:52,280 Speaker 2: Instagram is never like an absolute accurate portrayal of our lives. 230 00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:56,079 Speaker 2: Do you, Matilda Green, find that you do full victim 231 00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:59,840 Speaker 2: to a bit of rose colored glasses from time to time? 232 00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:04,440 Speaker 1: Yes, one hundred percent. Yes. But I think I've gotten 233 00:12:04,480 --> 00:12:07,520 Speaker 1: a lot better now at noticing when I'm feeling like that, 234 00:12:07,679 --> 00:12:12,199 Speaker 1: like I can, and usually I can pinpoint it to 235 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:17,400 Speaker 1: something else. So if I'm feeling like I'm comparing myself 236 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:20,680 Speaker 1: to other people, whether they've got i don't know, more 237 00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:25,120 Speaker 1: money or a better house or whatever it is, I 238 00:12:25,160 --> 00:12:27,440 Speaker 1: can usually think, ah, do you know what? I've been 239 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,160 Speaker 1: spending too much time on my phone recently, which is 240 00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:34,360 Speaker 1: usually linked to me feeling shitty. Yeap, So it's all 241 00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:39,360 Speaker 1: this vicious cycle. When I'm feeling tired and a bit 242 00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:44,000 Speaker 1: burnt out and just not quite on my game mentally, 243 00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:46,520 Speaker 1: then I spend more time on my phone, and then 244 00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:49,640 Speaker 1: I start comparing myself, and then I can I can 245 00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:53,160 Speaker 1: usually snap myself out of it pretty quick by just count. 246 00:12:53,760 --> 00:12:56,559 Speaker 2: Looks like there's a head popping into the frame. Is 247 00:12:56,760 --> 00:12:57,720 Speaker 2: Penny or is it a dog? 248 00:12:59,080 --> 00:13:05,960 Speaker 1: It's a little dog. Okay, cool, that's faster. And yeah, 249 00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:09,080 Speaker 1: I truly am so grateful every single day, and I 250 00:13:09,120 --> 00:13:13,000 Speaker 1: count my blessings no matter what. I really, I really 251 00:13:13,040 --> 00:13:16,560 Speaker 1: don't take anything in my life for granted, and I 252 00:13:16,640 --> 00:13:18,960 Speaker 1: just have to remind myself of that whenever I feel 253 00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:22,040 Speaker 1: because we all fall victim to it sometimes, I think. 254 00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:27,800 Speaker 1: And it depends on the situation you're in, Like sometimes 255 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:30,160 Speaker 1: you could be in a group where you know everyone's 256 00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:33,800 Speaker 1: got lots of money or something, or it just depends 257 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:36,640 Speaker 1: and then you start comparing yourself. But really, we're all 258 00:13:36,679 --> 00:13:39,240 Speaker 1: so lucky, so so lucky. 259 00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:43,480 Speaker 2: And what does success mean to you? If you were 260 00:13:43,559 --> 00:13:47,120 Speaker 2: to answer that in a sentence, how would you define it? 261 00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:47,680 Speaker 1: Success? 262 00:13:47,679 --> 00:13:47,920 Speaker 2: To me? 263 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:52,960 Speaker 1: I think means living a life that I can be 264 00:13:53,559 --> 00:13:56,240 Speaker 1: proud of in front of my kids. So if that 265 00:13:56,280 --> 00:14:01,880 Speaker 1: can be an example for them, then that's true success. 266 00:14:01,559 --> 00:14:03,440 Speaker 1: That's all it comes down to for me. 267 00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:08,320 Speaker 2: And when are you in your most proud moments? Like 268 00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:09,880 Speaker 2: if you could think back to when you had the 269 00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:11,760 Speaker 2: most pride. What would it be. 270 00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:20,240 Speaker 1: I think probably after the birth of my son Milo. 271 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:25,160 Speaker 1: I that moment for me was the most incredible moment 272 00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:28,520 Speaker 1: of my entire life, after going through such a long 273 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:32,840 Speaker 1: journey of you know, pregnancy and labor and all of that. 274 00:14:33,720 --> 00:14:36,600 Speaker 1: And I remember just lying in bed holding him because 275 00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:37,800 Speaker 1: I had a home birth, so I got to be 276 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:39,520 Speaker 1: in my own bed, which was so nice, and I 277 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:42,360 Speaker 1: was holding him just thinking like I can do anything. 278 00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:46,080 Speaker 1: And I think it was also like the hormones and 279 00:14:46,120 --> 00:14:49,240 Speaker 1: the feeling of like he's here, I get to meet him. 280 00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:50,960 Speaker 1: This is the person that's been a part of me 281 00:14:51,040 --> 00:14:53,000 Speaker 1: for so long, that I've talked to in my belly 282 00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:56,400 Speaker 1: and that I feel so bonded to. Now he's he's here, 283 00:14:56,520 --> 00:15:00,320 Speaker 1: He's a person I can I can look into his eyes. 284 00:15:01,040 --> 00:15:03,080 Speaker 1: And I also felt like go me. You know. I 285 00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:07,880 Speaker 1: really did think like I can achieve anything if I 286 00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:09,320 Speaker 1: put my mind to it. Yeah. 287 00:15:09,360 --> 00:15:12,960 Speaker 2: And those hormones they really are wild, like wild drugs. 288 00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:17,000 Speaker 2: And I think that's so like telling you know, because 289 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:20,120 Speaker 2: it is sort of coming through like a really hard 290 00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:22,960 Speaker 2: time and having that and I think like you learn 291 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:26,080 Speaker 2: a lot from life in that moment, right of like, 292 00:15:26,520 --> 00:15:30,760 Speaker 2: you know, good things are worth real hard work and 293 00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:32,760 Speaker 2: hard times, and it's not just going to be an 294 00:15:32,760 --> 00:15:37,880 Speaker 2: easy road. And also like expect the unexpected, don't even 295 00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:39,440 Speaker 2: know what's going to freaking happen, and you kind of 296 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:43,680 Speaker 2: just have to roll with the punches. Yeah, is there 297 00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:48,200 Speaker 2: a quote or some kind of mantra that you like 298 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:51,880 Speaker 2: to live your life by, whether it's consciously or subconsciously. 299 00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:54,080 Speaker 2: Is this something that you kind of revert back to 300 00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:56,400 Speaker 2: sometimes when things are getting a bit tough. 301 00:15:57,720 --> 00:16:02,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, I've got two. So one is one is life 302 00:16:02,320 --> 00:16:04,000 Speaker 1: begins at the end of your comfort zone, which is 303 00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:08,120 Speaker 1: kind of like what you're saying about how nothing worth 304 00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:12,000 Speaker 1: having comes easy right there. Discomfort is a good thing 305 00:16:12,400 --> 00:16:15,800 Speaker 1: and just being comfortable all the time is not necessarily 306 00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:20,240 Speaker 1: healthy or helpful for you. And I try and live 307 00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:23,040 Speaker 1: my life that way and think, if this is feeling scary, 308 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:28,040 Speaker 1: then maybe it's worth doing. And the second one is 309 00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:31,200 Speaker 1: can't win the more honestly, like that is just that's 310 00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:36,120 Speaker 1: saying helps me so much, Like if something goes wrong 311 00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:39,880 Speaker 1: or maybe I didn't get an opportunity, if something falls through, 312 00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:44,040 Speaker 1: or if you know, I haven't had a great day 313 00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:46,080 Speaker 1: on the parenting tools, I just go oh, I can't 314 00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:49,120 Speaker 1: win them all, and it really helps me because it 315 00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:51,440 Speaker 1: takes the charge out of it as well. And it's just, 316 00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:53,720 Speaker 1: oh wow, tomorrow's a new day. It's just it is 317 00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:55,600 Speaker 1: what it is. It can't be perfect all the time. 318 00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:57,280 Speaker 2: But you can win the war. You can lose a 319 00:16:57,280 --> 00:16:58,960 Speaker 2: few battles, but you can still win the war. 320 00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:02,320 Speaker 1: Right, there's still chance, you know, like we can bring 321 00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:03,080 Speaker 1: it there tomorrow. 322 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:07,040 Speaker 2: It's okay when you look back to you know how 323 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:09,880 Speaker 2: your life in the media kind of started years back 324 00:17:10,080 --> 00:17:12,159 Speaker 2: when you're on The Bachelor, Like how old were you? 325 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:16,639 Speaker 1: I was twenty four? Oh my god, And I cannot 326 00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:22,280 Speaker 1: watch that again because I'm like, who is that? Who 327 00:17:22,520 --> 00:17:24,560 Speaker 1: is that child on the show? 328 00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:31,200 Speaker 2: Would you do anything different? I mean, look, it worked 329 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:33,080 Speaker 2: out pretty well for you, but would you have done 330 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:37,360 Speaker 2: anything different? Like looking back through your journey of your 331 00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:40,640 Speaker 2: entrance into the public arena. 332 00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:46,719 Speaker 1: Oh, so many things, Okay, so many things. I think 333 00:17:47,560 --> 00:17:50,440 Speaker 1: I've evolved so much as a person, so it's it's 334 00:17:50,520 --> 00:17:53,480 Speaker 1: hard to think, Oh, I wish I'd done that differently 335 00:17:53,520 --> 00:17:55,199 Speaker 1: because I kind of was a different person. You know, 336 00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,920 Speaker 1: we all change as we get older. But I think 337 00:17:58,320 --> 00:18:00,960 Speaker 1: for me, I wish i'd been a little bit more 338 00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:05,960 Speaker 1: authentically myself because I was such a people pleaser at 339 00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:11,600 Speaker 1: that time in my life, especially like extreme, So I 340 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:16,080 Speaker 1: just wish I had had had the courage to say 341 00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:19,240 Speaker 1: what I really thought and stood up for myself a 342 00:18:19,280 --> 00:18:22,080 Speaker 1: bit more and just had had the guts to have 343 00:18:22,160 --> 00:18:23,440 Speaker 1: more of an opinion. 344 00:18:25,359 --> 00:18:25,880 Speaker 2: Big time. 345 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:30,119 Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, but I think I just you know, I 346 00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:33,360 Speaker 1: was young twenty four and twenty four at the time, 347 00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:37,359 Speaker 1: I was like, I'm really mature, and then now that 348 00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:39,879 Speaker 1: I'm almost thirty four, like, I don't know, should think 349 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:41,359 Speaker 1: I was mature to be honest. 350 00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:45,959 Speaker 2: Yeah, Look, you can't go through life with regrets, but 351 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:49,119 Speaker 2: you can, certainly, I guess, go through and evaluate, but 352 00:18:49,160 --> 00:18:50,760 Speaker 2: you got to be you got to be count yourself. 353 00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:55,359 Speaker 2: You can reflect, and I think being authentic is probably 354 00:18:55,440 --> 00:18:57,320 Speaker 2: one of the hardest things for a lot of people, 355 00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:00,520 Speaker 2: Like we're just so especially the world of and right now, 356 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:03,879 Speaker 2: it's just so hard to say something and then you 357 00:19:03,880 --> 00:19:05,520 Speaker 2: don't know how it's going to go, and then you're like, well, 358 00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:08,119 Speaker 2: there we go. That's gonna alienate me or that's gonna 359 00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:12,240 Speaker 2: It's a really interesting space that we're in right now, 360 00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:15,920 Speaker 2: where you know, people will have to be so careful 361 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,119 Speaker 2: with what they say. And yeah, I hope that people 362 00:19:19,600 --> 00:19:23,119 Speaker 2: kind of do find their authenticity. I think that's the 363 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:24,440 Speaker 2: ultimate in life. Really. 364 00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:27,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I think so too. And we're in this 365 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:32,160 Speaker 1: bizarre time where everyone is expected to have an opinion 366 00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:36,879 Speaker 1: on everything, and I think it's actually really unhelpful to 367 00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:43,240 Speaker 1: be honest, because no one's one opinion holds more weight 368 00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:48,240 Speaker 1: than anyone else's. And it's this weird time, isn't it, 369 00:19:48,280 --> 00:19:51,240 Speaker 1: where just because somebody has a social media following, get 370 00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:53,920 Speaker 1: expected to like have this public stance on so many 371 00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:57,240 Speaker 1: different issues. And it's like, Okay, I got followers from 372 00:19:57,240 --> 00:19:59,360 Speaker 1: going on The Bachelor, Like do you want. 373 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:04,680 Speaker 2: Me to yeah, into the geopolitical as exactly? I know, 374 00:20:04,960 --> 00:20:09,119 Speaker 2: I know, and yeah, it's it's not it's not normal. 375 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:10,960 Speaker 2: It's not normal. And also the exposure that we have 376 00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:12,800 Speaker 2: to every single thing that goes on in the world, 377 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,359 Speaker 2: Like back in villages times when we were like cave 378 00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:17,320 Speaker 2: me in, you know, you didn't know half the shit 379 00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:20,760 Speaker 2: that was going on. It's just like so much information, 380 00:20:21,119 --> 00:20:23,639 Speaker 2: whether it's even about health stuff or whether it's about 381 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:26,720 Speaker 2: political stuff. It's so hard to wag through. 382 00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:31,080 Speaker 1: And like nobody knows what's what's true anymore. Just like 383 00:20:31,359 --> 00:20:35,199 Speaker 1: somebody somebody sees something on Instagram with like a in 384 00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:38,240 Speaker 1: an authoritative way, You're like, oh, well, you know that 385 00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:40,600 Speaker 1: must be that must be true. And then someone else 386 00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,680 Speaker 1: say something completely different in a confident, abative. 387 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:45,440 Speaker 2: Way exactly, and then you're like, what just sucking side 388 00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:48,680 Speaker 2: do I take? I think the most important thing for 389 00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:52,840 Speaker 2: sanity is to just try and step away and like 390 00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:55,680 Speaker 2: absorb your world like the most. I think the most 391 00:20:55,720 --> 00:20:58,000 Speaker 2: beneficial thing you can do is be a positive impact 392 00:20:58,119 --> 00:21:02,720 Speaker 2: on your like immediate community, right, one hundred percent, yeah. 393 00:21:02,800 --> 00:21:07,360 Speaker 1: Because that's that's somewhere where you can make a direct impact, 394 00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:12,000 Speaker 1: Like if you are an active part of your community 395 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:15,280 Speaker 1: looking after those around you and and being an example 396 00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:17,320 Speaker 1: to your children about how to look after those around 397 00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:22,520 Speaker 1: you and and care for people and help others, that 398 00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:25,960 Speaker 1: is that's, in my opinion, one of the best things 399 00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,639 Speaker 1: you can do, because then you're raising those people to 400 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:31,040 Speaker 1: help the people around them, and then it's a you know, 401 00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:33,480 Speaker 1: it's a blow on effect of positivity. 402 00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:36,040 Speaker 2: Do you have any role models that you looked up 403 00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:39,560 Speaker 2: to or that you've even in the last ten years, 404 00:21:39,560 --> 00:21:42,000 Speaker 2: someone that you look up to now that you're like man, 405 00:21:42,119 --> 00:21:43,320 Speaker 2: they've got it going on. 406 00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:49,720 Speaker 1: So many people. But do you know what, mostly my 407 00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:55,439 Speaker 1: family and my neighbors like some honestly, like the people 408 00:21:55,520 --> 00:22:02,600 Speaker 1: that are in my community are so generous and giving. 409 00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:06,159 Speaker 1: And it's not that they have all of the stuff 410 00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:10,080 Speaker 1: to give, and it's just that's that's the community spirit. 411 00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:12,440 Speaker 1: And these people are just so kind and so generous. 412 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:15,919 Speaker 1: And I think since moving to a smaller community from 413 00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:19,639 Speaker 1: the city, I've learned so much from them about how 414 00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:22,520 Speaker 1: important it is to look after those around you and 415 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:27,040 Speaker 1: be active in fostering those relationships around you and in 416 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:30,040 Speaker 1: your community, because it doesn't just happen like you do. 417 00:22:30,160 --> 00:22:32,280 Speaker 1: Actually have to make an effort to be a part 418 00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:34,000 Speaker 1: of a community to have the community. 419 00:22:34,560 --> 00:22:37,280 Speaker 2: I found that big time moving rurally, Like, the community 420 00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:39,959 Speaker 2: spirit is wild. When I lived in the city for 421 00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:42,680 Speaker 2: so many years, I know even you my neighbors never 422 00:22:42,680 --> 00:22:46,400 Speaker 2: had any assistance striped through hard times. When anything happens, 423 00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:49,920 Speaker 2: they all band together and it's just the most beautiful thing. 424 00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:52,400 Speaker 2: And I think it is how we're supposed to live 425 00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:54,840 Speaker 2: as human beings, especially when there's children in the mix. 426 00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:56,760 Speaker 2: Like it does take a village and it takes a 427 00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:59,800 Speaker 2: community to actually stay sane, and I think that's why 428 00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:02,040 Speaker 2: there's so many issues going on now, like people feel 429 00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:03,680 Speaker 2: like they're forced to do it all on their own life. 430 00:23:03,680 --> 00:23:06,399 Speaker 2: If we could have been together. This is student like 431 00:23:06,440 --> 00:23:12,200 Speaker 2: an inspirational but isn't it true, like we need other 432 00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:13,560 Speaker 2: humans to survive. 433 00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:17,439 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, because social media gives us the illusion of connection, 434 00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:20,640 Speaker 1: but it's not connection, not at all. Like if anything, 435 00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:24,080 Speaker 1: it's well, I mean, we can just take one lock 436 00:23:24,119 --> 00:23:27,760 Speaker 1: at all the mental health stats and see that it's 437 00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:31,400 Speaker 1: not working. When we're like, we're we're connected, but we're 438 00:23:31,440 --> 00:23:35,520 Speaker 1: actually the less the least connected we've ever been. And 439 00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:38,240 Speaker 1: it's really sad. When we had the same situation when 440 00:23:38,240 --> 00:23:42,040 Speaker 1: we lived in Auckland, our neighbors like we'd come and 441 00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:44,240 Speaker 1: go and we were the same age. We probably should 442 00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:46,560 Speaker 1: have made an effort to be friends, but the only 443 00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:49,840 Speaker 1: time we ever interacted was when they was when their 444 00:23:49,880 --> 00:23:54,679 Speaker 1: dog escaped and I and so it was in the 445 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:58,119 Speaker 1: morning and I was holding my coffee and I was 446 00:23:58,160 --> 00:24:02,480 Speaker 1: holding the dog. I was calling them and I didn't 447 00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:04,920 Speaker 1: realize but like I was bending down to and get 448 00:24:04,920 --> 00:24:06,480 Speaker 1: the dog. And then as I was bending down, I 449 00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:07,720 Speaker 1: was pouring coffee on its head. 450 00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:10,760 Speaker 2: And I didn't even fuck and that's when we left 451 00:24:10,760 --> 00:24:11,640 Speaker 2: the city. 452 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:15,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, I was like this, so so then I had 453 00:24:15,119 --> 00:24:16,680 Speaker 1: to be like, hey, I've got your dog and also 454 00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:18,400 Speaker 1: I'm really sorry I bourn coffee all over. 455 00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:22,800 Speaker 2: How did they go down? Did they talked to you afterwards? 456 00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:26,359 Speaker 1: All? I know? It was just an awkward interaction and 457 00:24:26,359 --> 00:24:28,000 Speaker 1: they were like, oh, that's okay. I was like sorry, 458 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:29,480 Speaker 1: I didn't mentor and they were like, yeah, that's okay. 459 00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:30,440 Speaker 1: We're going to take the dog now. 460 00:24:33,480 --> 00:24:35,280 Speaker 2: So you won't be moving back to the city anytime. 461 00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:37,960 Speaker 2: So so you line up there. So you guys are 462 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:43,080 Speaker 2: like out of the city quite not rural, but like 463 00:24:43,119 --> 00:24:44,760 Speaker 2: small town small small town. 464 00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:47,760 Speaker 1: Yes, well, like it's not that small. I don't know 465 00:24:47,800 --> 00:24:50,119 Speaker 1: what the population of Walkward, US have you five thousand? 466 00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:53,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's Ce's it's tweet on the way tweet Tweet's 467 00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:54,400 Speaker 2: not the right word. 468 00:24:55,520 --> 00:25:00,400 Speaker 1: It's i'd say it's medium small town. Yeah, but it's 469 00:25:00,840 --> 00:25:03,680 Speaker 1: it's it's growing pretty rapidly, and some of the og 470 00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:04,960 Speaker 1: locals are not happy about it. 471 00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:10,760 Speaker 2: They're not they're not in training. You haven't got McDonald's 472 00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:13,720 Speaker 2: or the wee house coming in of you at the 473 00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:16,199 Speaker 2: warehouse to be here We've got the warehouse and it 474 00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:18,040 Speaker 2: goes off, it pops off. It's great for kids. 475 00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:22,480 Speaker 1: I'm saying to actually, like, you know what we need. 476 00:25:22,560 --> 00:25:24,880 Speaker 1: We need a kid's boutique, you know, like we need 477 00:25:24,880 --> 00:25:27,119 Speaker 1: a kids drop in town where people can go and 478 00:25:27,119 --> 00:25:28,639 Speaker 1: get their their kids party supplies. 479 00:25:28,840 --> 00:25:32,880 Speaker 2: You're going to advocate breaking kids boutique. 480 00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:36,080 Speaker 1: From even start. One. 481 00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:39,560 Speaker 2: Been so nice chatting with you today. I want to 482 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:43,440 Speaker 2: finish on what advice you would give to your eighteen 483 00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:45,200 Speaker 2: year old self. I know we talked about like looking 484 00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:46,440 Speaker 2: back at the Bachelor of that if you could talk 485 00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:51,159 Speaker 2: to a younger version of yourself, knowing what's ahead, what 486 00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:52,080 Speaker 2: would you tell yourself? 487 00:25:52,720 --> 00:25:54,439 Speaker 1: The first thing would be lay off the fake han 488 00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:58,960 Speaker 1: for the of God, it's just it's just not okay. 489 00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:03,320 Speaker 1: And the main, the main serious one is because I 490 00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:06,800 Speaker 1: went through school with most people telling me that I 491 00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:09,600 Speaker 1: wasn't an athlete and that I wasn't academic, and so 492 00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:13,920 Speaker 1: I had these these beliefs from when I was really 493 00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:16,040 Speaker 1: young to when I finished school, thinking, right, I'm not 494 00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:18,200 Speaker 1: smart and I'm not good at sports, So what's left 495 00:26:18,240 --> 00:26:22,240 Speaker 1: I'm good with people? Okay, so that's a pretty small pool. 496 00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:26,720 Speaker 1: So I'll go into sales and like, which was great, 497 00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:30,080 Speaker 1: But I really wish that I could tell myself, like, 498 00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:33,400 Speaker 1: you are smart and you can achieve whatever you want 499 00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:36,280 Speaker 1: to achieve. And I just wish I had had more 500 00:26:36,359 --> 00:26:40,040 Speaker 1: voices telling me that through school. And it has made 501 00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:44,400 Speaker 1: me realize how important it is not to label your 502 00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:46,639 Speaker 1: children as well, because they really take it on board 503 00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:49,560 Speaker 1: like oh, you're shy, you're quiet, you're sporty, you're this, 504 00:26:50,119 --> 00:26:52,760 Speaker 1: you're smart, you're not good at writing, you're good at this, 505 00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:55,480 Speaker 1: because they believe it and they think, oh, okay, well I'm 506 00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:59,359 Speaker 1: not good at that, so that's the reality. Yeah, yeah, 507 00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:03,639 Speaker 1: yeah exactly. So I really wish I could tell eighteen 508 00:27:03,720 --> 00:27:06,680 Speaker 1: year old me that you can achieve it if if 509 00:27:06,720 --> 00:27:07,919 Speaker 1: you try, you're not done. 510 00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:11,119 Speaker 2: That's beautiful. Well, I'm so grateful for you popping on 511 00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:13,480 Speaker 2: today and having a little chat and having like a 512 00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:17,480 Speaker 2: little lens into your life behind the behind the scenes 513 00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:18,639 Speaker 2: of Matilda Green. 514 00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:22,080 Speaker 1: Thanks for having me. It was lovely to catch up 515 00:27:22,119 --> 00:27:26,080 Speaker 1: and just be a part of this zen moments. 516 00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:29,320 Speaker 2: Lovely, mist I should have told you to bring a 517 00:27:29,359 --> 00:27:32,280 Speaker 2: cup of tea or something. I've actually got my oil 518 00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:35,640 Speaker 2: b Do you like that? 519 00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:41,160 Speaker 1: Yeah? To the side, Oh that's nice. I've just got 520 00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:44,119 Speaker 1: a dog and a lot of mess, so I won't 521 00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:45,520 Speaker 1: show you the backdrop. 522 00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:49,360 Speaker 2: Hey, that's what it's all about, the realness of being human. Matilda, 523 00:27:49,359 --> 00:27:52,320 Speaker 2: thank you so much. I really really appreciate it. 524 00:27:52,520 --> 00:27:53,200 Speaker 1: Thanks Pja. 525 00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:57,520 Speaker 2: Listening back to that chat, I really wish I had 526 00:27:57,760 --> 00:28:00,800 Speaker 2: dived into a few more questions with Matilda, but I 527 00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:03,640 Speaker 2: ended up cutting it short, and I've still got more 528 00:28:03,680 --> 00:28:05,479 Speaker 2: I want to talk to her about. But there were 529 00:28:05,520 --> 00:28:08,280 Speaker 2: a few things that really did stick out to me 530 00:28:08,359 --> 00:28:11,359 Speaker 2: this week, and I loved that. You know, when she 531 00:28:11,480 --> 00:28:13,480 Speaker 2: is feeling overwhelmed or she's about to lose a shit, 532 00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:16,760 Speaker 2: she'll reset with a dance in the kitchen, with like 533 00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:20,280 Speaker 2: a little you know, a little dance party. It's that simple. 534 00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:24,119 Speaker 2: Just turning on music really loudly, and it doesn't matter, Like, 535 00:28:24,240 --> 00:28:26,399 Speaker 2: don't care if it's a cool song or not. Just 536 00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:28,879 Speaker 2: blast it loudly and it does reset the mode. I 537 00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:33,919 Speaker 2: found it so so effective when my toldles melting darden 538 00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:36,119 Speaker 2: or having a tantrum, or just the day it feels 539 00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:39,160 Speaker 2: really hard. As I said, I put on that birth 540 00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:41,200 Speaker 2: playlist and it just brings me back to what really 541 00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:43,600 Speaker 2: matters in life. I also love how she made it 542 00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:46,080 Speaker 2: clear of what her non negotible is. 543 00:28:46,120 --> 00:28:46,239 Speaker 1: Now. 544 00:28:46,280 --> 00:28:48,680 Speaker 2: I'm sure there's lots of things that she does also 545 00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:52,719 Speaker 2: incorporate into a routine, but the meditation, and I know 546 00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:55,400 Speaker 2: that's also really kind of off putting for a lot 547 00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:57,760 Speaker 2: of people. They think, shit, I can't sit that still 548 00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:02,480 Speaker 2: for that amount of time. I learned vadic meditation. Gosh, 549 00:29:02,480 --> 00:29:05,200 Speaker 2: when was it? When I was in Melbourne on breakfast 550 00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:10,480 Speaker 2: radio and I was sleep deprived, and I just remember 551 00:29:10,520 --> 00:29:15,040 Speaker 2: how incredible it was. They say it's like equivalent to 552 00:29:15,120 --> 00:29:17,240 Speaker 2: a few hours sleep or something like that. Who do 553 00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:20,400 Speaker 2: it properly? You set yourself out to do it twice 554 00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:23,520 Speaker 2: a day, twenty minutes each time. Now as your parent, 555 00:29:23,640 --> 00:29:27,200 Speaker 2: there can differ, but I think trying to stick to 556 00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:30,080 Speaker 2: doing that as much as possible. It does. There's so 557 00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:33,640 Speaker 2: much research and science behind it. It really is a 558 00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:35,760 Speaker 2: magical tool. So I love that she has put that 559 00:29:35,880 --> 00:29:38,680 Speaker 2: as one of her Nona Gosh balls. I was really 560 00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:42,960 Speaker 2: related with her move to walk with in that small 561 00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:45,440 Speaker 2: community and the impact that that's had on her life 562 00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:49,959 Speaker 2: and seeing firsthand the simple acts of community and how 563 00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:53,920 Speaker 2: they really make a difference, And you know that kind 564 00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:58,160 Speaker 2: of stuff is so much more important than posting the 565 00:29:58,240 --> 00:30:00,640 Speaker 2: latest opinion on the latest thing that's going on in 566 00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:03,480 Speaker 2: the news and feeling value from that. I mean, I'm 567 00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:06,520 Speaker 2: not saying that that doesn't have a place. It absolutely does, 568 00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:09,400 Speaker 2: But I think it can feel really overwhelming when there's 569 00:30:09,400 --> 00:30:10,920 Speaker 2: so much going on and you feel like you're not 570 00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:13,840 Speaker 2: contributing to the world. One way of getting back to 571 00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:18,760 Speaker 2: feeling like you are making some kind of difference as 572 00:30:18,840 --> 00:30:23,280 Speaker 2: tepping into your community and seeing your acts firsthand pay off. 573 00:30:24,360 --> 00:30:27,680 Speaker 2: So that really sat with me, and I loved her 574 00:30:27,680 --> 00:30:30,200 Speaker 2: advice to her younger self. I'm going to kind of 575 00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:32,640 Speaker 2: paraphrase it here, but the way I read it was, 576 00:30:32,840 --> 00:30:34,920 Speaker 2: don't absorb what others think of you, because look, they 577 00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:37,600 Speaker 2: could tell you a green elephant, and if you hear 578 00:30:37,600 --> 00:30:40,080 Speaker 2: that enough, you will genuinely believe it. And that's what 579 00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:42,800 Speaker 2: we do, right. People will tell you you're not sporty, 580 00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:44,400 Speaker 2: you're not good enough, you're not this, you're not that, 581 00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:46,760 Speaker 2: and you genuinely believe it if you hear it enough. 582 00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:51,440 Speaker 2: So it's finding that strength in yourself to know who 583 00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:53,000 Speaker 2: you are. And I don't think that you get that 584 00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:56,200 Speaker 2: when you're younger. That happens when you grow up, you 585 00:30:56,240 --> 00:31:00,719 Speaker 2: have experiences, and you learn who you are who you 586 00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:04,080 Speaker 2: know as the years go by. But it's something we 587 00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:06,920 Speaker 2: can all take something from, you know, standing true to 588 00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:11,600 Speaker 2: yourself and not believing every negative word that someone has 589 00:31:11,600 --> 00:31:14,520 Speaker 2: to say about you. So yeah, I really enjoyed my 590 00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:16,200 Speaker 2: catch up with Matilda this week. As I said, I 591 00:31:16,240 --> 00:31:18,960 Speaker 2: do wish actually I kind of dived a little bit 592 00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:22,000 Speaker 2: deeper and now I'm looking back. We could have gone 593 00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:24,280 Speaker 2: on some wild tangents, but look, I hope you've got 594 00:31:24,280 --> 00:31:26,200 Speaker 2: something out of it. I'd love to know your thoughts 595 00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:28,560 Speaker 2: on this week's episode, and if you've got any suggestions 596 00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:31,000 Speaker 2: for other people who'd be a great fit for the podcast, 597 00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:34,480 Speaker 2: get in touch with me on Instagram at PJDJ and 598 00:31:34,560 --> 00:31:36,680 Speaker 2: I'll be back next week. Have a good one.