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Speaker 1: Hello.

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Speaker 2: I am Paula Bennett and welcome to my new Zealand

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Speaker 2: Herald podcast Ask Me Anything. And one thing I've learned

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Speaker 2: in life is it's never too late to learn something new.

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Speaker 2: So on this podcast, I talk to people from all

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Speaker 2: walks of life to hear.

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Speaker 3: About how they got to where they are.

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Speaker 2: And get some advice and guidance on some of life's

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Speaker 2: biggest questions. Without a doubt, I think today's guest is

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Speaker 2: dealing with some of life's biggest questions.

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Speaker 3: So here we go. His name is Bill Edgar.

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Speaker 2: Bill made worldwide headlines a few years back as the

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Speaker 2: Coffin Confessor. He's paid by the dying to gatecrash their

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Speaker 2: funerals once they are gone and carry out their dying

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Speaker 2: wishes hardly.

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Speaker 3: You're regular nine to five and the.

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Speaker 2: Last few years Bill is extended the services he offers

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Speaker 2: and has written a book about it and also what

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Speaker 2: he's learned from from the dying. In his book that

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Speaker 2: I've just read, which is The Afterlife Confessional.

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Speaker 3: Bill is with me from Australia. How are you.

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Speaker 4: I'm great, how are you doing? And thank you for

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Speaker 4: having me.

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Speaker 3: I'm really rapped to have you. I'm a bit I'm

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Speaker 3: a big fan, big fan.

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Speaker 1: Excellent, that's really nice to hear.

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Speaker 2: I think you've got the best job in the world.

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Speaker 2: But anyway, the other thing I thought I was going

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Speaker 2: to say at this point is that Bill can be

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Speaker 2: a bit of a sweary beer and we all know

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Speaker 2: I can be a little bit as well. So if

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Speaker 2: you're going to be offended, then just don't listen.

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Speaker 1: Come on, I'm from the country and you guys are

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Speaker 1: from the country that once we're worrious.

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Speaker 3: Exactly.

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Speaker 2: But I was trying to explain to some young people

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Speaker 2: the other day who are all in the tradees and

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Speaker 2: they're good good I call them kids.

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Speaker 3: Anyone under thirty is a kid to me, And I

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Speaker 3: said to.

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Speaker 2: Them, swearing is fine, but we do it for emphasis,

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Speaker 2: not for just this, just not every thod word.

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Speaker 3: You know, it's cool when it's got an.

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Speaker 1: Emphasis, I think, absolutely, And that's the only time I

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Speaker 1: used it is when I, you know, basically get at

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Speaker 1: emphasis for sure.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, Okay, quite far questions If you go to the

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Speaker 2: pub for a drink with any celebrity, who would it be?

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Speaker 2: No one, No, when you don't really like them.

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Speaker 4: I'm not into it, and I don't go to pubs either.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so you know, it's just it's my thing, my

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Speaker 1: personal thing. I'm not into any of that type of stuff.

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Speaker 1: I've worked with celebrities. I've been a bodyguard for Jimmy Barnes.

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Speaker 1: I've done a lot of things in my life. And

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Speaker 1: to be honest with you, there are just people that

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Speaker 1: I was.

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Speaker 3: Going to say, most of them just normal people.

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Speaker 4: Yeah they are.

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Speaker 1: They're just normal people and they're all trying to get

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Speaker 1: by in life, just like we all are. Some have

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Speaker 1: better opportunity or they've grabbed that opportunity and run with it.

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Speaker 2: Good on them, Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, but it doesn't

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Speaker 2: you know, it's just sort of saying to someone the

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Speaker 2: other day, doesn't matter how much money you've got, it

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Speaker 2: doesn't matter where you are. At some stage in your life.

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Speaker 2: We all go through death, we all go through divorces.

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Speaker 2: Somewhere in our family, someone gets sacked, someone's can bloody,

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Speaker 2: takes drugs that they shouldn't.

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Speaker 3: You know what I mean. Life happens to you nomadical

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Speaker 3: know who you are or where you live or what

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Speaker 3: you joy.

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Speaker 4: And that's the journey for all of us.

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Speaker 1: It's the final journey that we all are going to

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Speaker 1: be taking. And that's the thing that I'm trying to

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Speaker 1: get across that every person on the planet is going

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Speaker 1: to die.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it doesn't matter what you do, So stop.

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Speaker 1: Worrying about the bill, share, get rid of the stuff

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Speaker 1: that's in your life that's just holding you back or

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Speaker 1: weighing you down, and move on.

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Speaker 4: Enjoy life.

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Speaker 2: Okay, now I did it a bit in the intro,

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Speaker 2: but there'll be a whole lot of people listening right

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Speaker 2: now that have no idea what you do, and then

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Speaker 2: we're going to doubt into it. You've got some great stories,

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Speaker 2: and I do want to talk about I've.

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Speaker 3: Got so many questions.

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Speaker 2: But do you want to explain in your own words

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Speaker 2: kind of what your day job is or nightclobe.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So I'm engaged by the deceased prior to them dying,

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Speaker 1: to attend their funeral, to crash their funeral and tell

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Speaker 1: those that were loved how much they were loved, and

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Speaker 1: those my clients love to hate the fuck off.

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Speaker 2: And so you literally do that, right, so you look

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Speaker 2: really go along. Eulogy started. I take funerals, by the way,

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Speaker 2: So there is a part of me as I was

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Speaker 2: reading it, going, oh my god, I'd be horrified.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, look, room to give that, I said amongst family

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Speaker 1: and friends, and I you know, I'm engaged to either

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Speaker 1: stand up mid eulogy or at a certain time. It's

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Speaker 1: always my client's timing. They allow me to obviously have

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Speaker 1: a little bit of input, but I'll say to him, look,

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Speaker 1: you know it's your best mate and he's done the

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Speaker 1: wrong thing by it. Do you want me to get

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Speaker 1: up mid eulogy and tell him to stop the crocodile

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Speaker 1: tears and all the bullshit and just get on with

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Speaker 1: it or do you want?

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Speaker 2: You know?

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Speaker 1: And I'll leave it to them and they'll they'll come

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Speaker 1: out with some Look at most people on the deathbed

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Speaker 1: come out with some great things because it's their last say,

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Speaker 1: it's all they've got left.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and there's not a lot going on, right, so

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Speaker 2: you've got a lot of time in your own head.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, for sure.

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Speaker 3: Yeah for sure.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Well, should we quickly tell the story of Graham,

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Speaker 2: because I think that is I mean, I know that

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Speaker 2: you've told it so many times, but it does encompass

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Speaker 2: exactly what and how it started and what you do.

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Speaker 3: So Graham's done.

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Speaker 4: Absolutely. Graham was my first client.

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Speaker 1: I was working for him in the field of private investigator,

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Speaker 1: which I am. I'm in the finance world, so I

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Speaker 1: was investigating his finances. Graham was on his deathbed. We

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Speaker 1: spoke about death, life and everything in between, and I

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Speaker 1: said to Graham, you know, I do your own eulogy

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Speaker 1: if you want to do something. And he said, look,

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Speaker 1: I've been to too many of your funerals and the

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Speaker 1: family view the eulogy first and they say whether it

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Speaker 1: goes on or not. And I don't want that. And

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Speaker 1: I said, okay, I said, and there was a joke.

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Speaker 1: I just said, out of a joke, Graham, I could

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Speaker 1: always crash your funeral for you, mate, And he said, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that sounds reasonable, it sounds all right. And a couple

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Speaker 1: of weeks later I get a text from Graham and saying,

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Speaker 1: You're going to crash my funeral for me.

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Speaker 3: And so you chrised his funeral, right and absolutely.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And he was he was watching a whole lot

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Speaker 2: of stuff go on with a so called bess mate

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Speaker 2: that just was not foul, and he wanted he wanted

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Speaker 2: him to be called out for it.

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Speaker 1: Right, yeah, absolutely, And that was the thing for me,

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Speaker 1: he as an investigator, I didn't want to just crash

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Speaker 1: a funeral without having this fact.

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Speaker 4: So I needed to know the facts.

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Speaker 1: So I asked Graham if I could set up a

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Speaker 1: couple of cameras in his house, and within twenty four

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Speaker 1: hours I had everything I needed on this scumbag of

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Speaker 1: a mate that he had.

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Speaker 3: He was he was absolutely had on the mess o.

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Speaker 1: Big time, big time and trying to take over the

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Speaker 1: family type thing. And it was just it was so

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Speaker 1: it's so sick and revolving watching this absolute predator. And

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Speaker 1: I thought, you know what, Graham, not a problem in

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Speaker 1: the world, mate, I'll go and I'll do that.

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Speaker 4: And then Graham said to me listen.

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Speaker 1: He said, also just to let you know, if my brother,

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Speaker 1: his wife and their daughter attend my funeral, please tell

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Speaker 1: them to fuck off. I haven't seen him in thirty years.

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Speaker 1: Their vultures in the family.

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Speaker 4: Get rid of them.

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Speaker 1: Wow, no a problem.

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Speaker 2: So you walk, Can you sit down? You're nervous. It's

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Speaker 2: the first time, right, yeah. Yeah, So you're sitting in

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Speaker 2: the air and that's raising of a you know, any

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Speaker 2: thinking about the moment and then you know, so called

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Speaker 2: bess make it's up there and.

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Speaker 3: I'm here and it's being on my harbor.

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Speaker 5: Grame make for the last you know, fifty years, and

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Speaker 5: you know I'm just going to miss and me and

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Speaker 5: you stand up right, Oh yeah.

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Speaker 1: I stand straight up, and I say, excuse me, my

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Speaker 1: name's Bill Edgar, Sit down, shut up, or fuck off.

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Speaker 4: The man in the coffin's got something to say. And

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Speaker 4: this is what it is. And I opened the envelope.

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Speaker 1: That yeah, I opened the envelope and pull out the

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Speaker 1: letter that Graham wrote and I read aloud exactly what

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Speaker 1: it was.

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Speaker 4: And that's what I did. And it was And honestly.

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Speaker 1: I thought that was it. I thought that was the

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Speaker 1: whole job, never to be done again, something or one off.

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Speaker 1: But no, you know, it just went nuts.

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Speaker 4: It was crazy. I left that funeral.

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Speaker 1: I need to do another one and another one. And

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Speaker 1: then the doors opened everywhere. It was just ridiculous.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Okay, we're going to talk a lot

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Speaker 2: more about that and and some of those. So, but

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Speaker 2: talk to me about some of your upbringing because you know,

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Speaker 2: I mean, well you mentioned once for Warriors before. I mean,

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Speaker 2: you are the son of a gangster. But it's a

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Speaker 2: bit different than that, right that former street kid. You know,

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Speaker 2: you've talked about you know, you've talked about the abuse

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Speaker 2: that you've suffered and what sort of how do you

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Speaker 2: think that kind of upbringing has impacted on you and

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Speaker 2: some of the decisions you made in the earlier years.

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Speaker 4: Oh, the earlier years.

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Speaker 1: I mean, look, you know, my childhood was stolen at

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Speaker 1: the age of seven, you know, all the way through.

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Speaker 1: I never had a childhood or religion that was stolen

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Speaker 1: as well, through the church and the schools. But I

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Speaker 1: got to say, without me going through that, through my

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Speaker 1: whole life and the torment and the trauma and everything,

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Speaker 1: it probably wouldn't have set me up to do what

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Speaker 1: I do today, you know. Yeah, and I do mention

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Speaker 1: like that the once for Worris thing Jake, the musts

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Speaker 1: and all that. I've stood in front of people ten

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Speaker 1: times other than him, you know. And it's not it's

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Speaker 1: not because I was I wanted to.

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Speaker 4: I was forced to.

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Speaker 1: I was incarcerated in a prison in Australia at the

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Speaker 1: age of just seventeen, you know. And back then, seventeen

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Speaker 1: is a lot different to what a seventeen year old

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Speaker 1: is today. So nineteen eighty four or seventeen year old

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Speaker 1: was like, yeah, obviously a little kid you know, and

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Speaker 1: I was forced to do certain things, but I lived

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Speaker 1: on the streets. I'd done a lot of things prior

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Speaker 1: to being fifteen years of age. It was a shocking life,

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Speaker 1: absolutely shocking.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, And so do you think that because what

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Speaker 2: you do takes guts, right, you know, it's.

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Speaker 4: Not for Yeah, it's not for the faint.

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Speaker 2: At all. And so do you think some of that?

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Speaker 2: And it must be some of what you say. It's like, mate,

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Speaker 2: for what I've lived through, you know, yeah, And.

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Speaker 1: That's what gives me the I suppose the courage to

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Speaker 1: do what I do because you know, I'll see some

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Speaker 1: people's lives and I get to see that their personal

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Speaker 1: deepest darket secrets, fantasies, desires, whatever it is, I get

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Speaker 1: to see it. And none of them have come close

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Speaker 1: to my life yet. So I'm happy to do what

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Speaker 1: I'm doing.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 2: And you sort of say and I believe you and

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Speaker 2: that you have no judgment, you know what I mean,

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Speaker 2: like because people confess to you. You know you've give

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Speaker 2: because I should say that. You know that the role

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Speaker 2: of kind of being the coffin compussor is sort of

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Speaker 2: you call yourself a concierge for the dying as well.

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Speaker 3: Now, so there's a lot more of that.

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Speaker 2: Hey, I've got something hidden in my house that I

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Speaker 2: don't want anyone to see. Can you please go and

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Speaker 2: get it so you know, like I might just have

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Speaker 2: a final wish that I don't want a family member

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Speaker 2: to do. I want someone that's actually not personally involved

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Speaker 2: or and that's a lot of what.

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Speaker 3: You do now.

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Speaker 4: Oh. Absolutely, I do home sweeps.

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Speaker 1: I call them so I go to people's homes and

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Speaker 1: I remove sensity bioms so they don't want their family

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Speaker 1: and friends to find. And for example, I mean the

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Speaker 1: first time I ever did that job was an eighty

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Speaker 1: eight year old man on palliative care. And I didn't

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Speaker 1: realize that elderly people, yes, they have a fall at home,

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Speaker 1: they go to hospital, but they get told they're never

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Speaker 1: going home again, so they can't retrieve their items. And

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Speaker 1: this gentleman, he basically had what you'd call it was

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Speaker 1: a sex dungeon, but it was he's eighty eight years

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Speaker 1: of age.

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Speaker 4: But it wasn't bad. It was very it was a

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Speaker 4: romantic type of setting.

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Speaker 1: It was ridiculous, but for him, and he had all

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Speaker 1: these women in their sixty seventies eighties that loved him,

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Speaker 1: and yeah, but he had three sons and he would

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Speaker 1: mortify it if they were to walk in his house

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Speaker 1: and find this secret room. So he asked me to

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Speaker 1: go in and clean it out for him, and between

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Speaker 1: me and his palliative care nurse, you know, everything was

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Speaker 1: done nicely and it was incinerated. And I take the

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Speaker 1: video back to my client and I show him and

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Speaker 1: he go, oh wow. So I'm so grateful, thank you.

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Speaker 3: So much, because he can risk and pace.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely, and that's what most of my clients want to do.

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Speaker 1: They either want to rest in peace or they want

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Speaker 1: to go out with a bang, letting know family know

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Speaker 1: that they're all pack of pricks or whatever else.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

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Speaker 2: So two things from that. So one, as I said,

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Speaker 2: I believe you. You say you don't judge people, but

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Speaker 2: you do judge the assholes.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Absolutely.

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Speaker 1: It gets to this stage where can you really judge

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Speaker 1: a dying person?

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Speaker 4: I mean, do you have the right to judge them?

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's their life, they've lived it and now

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Speaker 1: it's ending.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 1: My judgment, yes, is cast towards those that have done

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Speaker 1: the wrong thing by those people, but that's that's human nature.

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Speaker 1: We've all done we all do that, and I try

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Speaker 1: not to judge anybody in a way that Like if

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Speaker 1: a client comes to me and he says, look, you know,

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Speaker 1: i've been screwing with the neighbor's wife and my wife

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Speaker 1: doesn't know, and can you please talk to her face

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Speaker 1: to face?

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Speaker 4: And I'm like, I can do that, but why didn't you?

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Speaker 4: You know?

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Speaker 1: And then I'll put that on them and they'll say,

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Speaker 1: you know what Bill is who would have been with.

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Speaker 4: Me in my last three months of life? You know?

303
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Speaker 4: I have no one?

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Speaker 1: And I'd say to him, look, you know, I'll try

305
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Speaker 1: compassionately to tell him that, you know, But it sounds

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Speaker 1: to me like you're sucking the life out of them

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Speaker 1: just for you to live your last three months of

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Speaker 1: life for care.

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Speaker 4: But again, maybe.

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Speaker 1: They will live on knowing that you're a bit of

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Speaker 1: a freak and they can happily go about and do

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Speaker 1: whatever they want out there free.

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Speaker 3: Or do you need to know?

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Speaker 2: And you do say that in your book, You know

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Speaker 2: there are people that I'm a I'm a Do they

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Speaker 2: need to know?

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Speaker 1: You know?

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Speaker 3: Like I mean, some things they.

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Speaker 2: Do quite frankly, if you're an absolute asshole and you've

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Speaker 2: been treating you like that guy, your Graham's bloody mate.

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Speaker 2: But then there's you know, I've been having an affair

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Speaker 2: with the neighbor for freaking three years. It's like, wow,

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Speaker 2: so I'm losing who I thought was my wonderful, caring husband.

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Speaker 2: Now I'm finding out they haven't been. So I've got

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Speaker 2: to deal with shame embarrassment exactly as well.

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Speaker 1: And that's where I'll sit with the client and say

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Speaker 1: to him, look, do they really need to know that part?

328
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Speaker 4: Maybe just say you had an affair.

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Speaker 1: Leave it at that, you know, and if you really

330
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Speaker 1: want to out them or just take it with you,

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Speaker 1: you know, I take it with you, because I mean,

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Speaker 1: you're only going to hurt the wife or whoever else

333
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Speaker 1: around you. But it's not my care. I'm just the messenger.

334
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Speaker 1: I can only go about what they asked me to do.

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Speaker 1: But there are certain circumstances.

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Speaker 4: I guess.

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Speaker 1: We're just recently a lady that I attended her funeral

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Speaker 1: and I told her husband that she's been seeing multiple men. Oh,

339
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Speaker 1: and he was like, oh, And I said, but you've

340
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Speaker 1: been seeing multiple women and she already knew, so sucked in, you.

341
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Speaker 2: Know, So you so my second back to that as well, though,

342
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Speaker 2: was the judgment thing, which I think you're absolutely right

343
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Speaker 2: owning honestly, as long as it's legal, you do you

344
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Speaker 2: But do you really believe, because you say it repeatedly

345
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Speaker 2: that everyone has a secret?

346
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Speaker 4: Absolutely?

347
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Speaker 3: What I'm trying to think of, I've got a secret

348
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Speaker 3: and I can't thank you a secret? Do you think

349
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Speaker 3: I've put that on my dying beard.

350
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Speaker 1: It may not be a sexual, vindictive or something deep

351
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Speaker 1: dark or anything like that.

352
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Speaker 4: It might just be a secret as in you might.

353
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Speaker 4: It could be a cross dresser, or it could be.

354
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Speaker 1: Somebody that likes to do certain things that other people

355
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Speaker 1: would find a bit insensitive, or you know, whatever it is.

356
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Speaker 1: But I do believe everybody has a secret. Yeah, a

357
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Speaker 1: skeleton in the closet, it's for sure.

358
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Speaker 3: Okay, okay, all right, then I believe you. So is

359
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Speaker 3: it a risky job? Like you know, there must be times?

360
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:38,520
Speaker 3: Have you physical altercations?

361
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Speaker 1: Not really? I mean I've been told that if they

362
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Speaker 1: didn't like what they were hearing, that I'd end up

363
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Speaker 1: in the coffin with my client. At the same time, look,

364
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Speaker 1: what I do is I get the crowd on my

365
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Speaker 1: side very very fast for telling them that this is

366
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Speaker 1: their loved one laying in the coffin. It's not my words,

367
00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:58,240
Speaker 1: it's theirs. You've come to celebrate their life. How about

368
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Speaker 1: you listen. It's their funeral, not yours. Listen to what

369
00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:03,440
Speaker 1: they have to say. And then all of a sudden,

370
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:05,440
Speaker 1: you know, ninety percent of the crowd want to know

371
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Speaker 1: what's going on. Anybody else that stands up or interjects,

372
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Speaker 1: they're shouted down by the crowd.

373
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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, so it's not you. You don't need to

374
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Speaker 2: worry about it. But you do give one example of

375
00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:19,520
Speaker 2: a guy who's in tell them, tell everyone the story,

376
00:16:19,560 --> 00:16:22,240
Speaker 2: you know, the guy that's obviously dying, and then he

377
00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:24,320
Speaker 2: wants you to go on because he's got some money

378
00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:26,040
Speaker 2: head and he doesn't want it to go to his family,

379
00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:28,160
Speaker 2: and he's got something personal in that box as well.

380
00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:30,680
Speaker 2: And you go to the house and his family are

381
00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:33,240
Speaker 2: already in there cleaning it out, and you.

382
00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:33,800
Speaker 4: Oh, that's it.

383
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:36,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, that's happened a few times now, where

384
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:40,760
Speaker 1: it's just it's so and that's again people say, oh,

385
00:16:40,760 --> 00:16:41,560
Speaker 1: that's human nature.

386
00:16:41,640 --> 00:16:42,720
Speaker 4: No, it's bullshit.

387
00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:46,280
Speaker 1: It's greed, it's theft, it's it's just it's you know,

388
00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:48,720
Speaker 1: it's not love for the person dying or laying in

389
00:16:48,760 --> 00:16:51,840
Speaker 1: on their deathbed. These vultures are in the house going

390
00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:55,360
Speaker 1: through all this gentleman's stuff and they couldn't find what

391
00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:58,800
Speaker 1: they needed to find. Well, I knew exactly where to

392
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Speaker 1: go and locate you in.

393
00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:03,160
Speaker 2: Expecting them to be there though, right, you put it

394
00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:04,640
Speaker 2: to the house and everyone's in there.

395
00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:07,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, so you ransacking the house.

396
00:17:07,119 --> 00:17:09,000
Speaker 1: Some people are taking Midems and putting him in the

397
00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:09,919
Speaker 1: boots of their cars.

398
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:11,520
Speaker 4: I mean, it's just ridiculous.

399
00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:13,480
Speaker 2: But you can a man up at that point, right,

400
00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:16,880
Speaker 2: do you just you just made the decision to stride

401
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:17,399
Speaker 2: on throat And.

402
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:19,479
Speaker 1: Yeah, I just went in and didn't talk to anybody,

403
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:22,080
Speaker 1: got what I had to get and I'm basically leaving

404
00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:24,240
Speaker 1: and they're all, you know, I'm going to call the

405
00:17:24,280 --> 00:17:26,159
Speaker 1: police and do that. And I offered to call the

406
00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:27,359
Speaker 1: police for them, or you.

407
00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:29,919
Speaker 4: Know, I said, you're breaking the law. I'm not.

408
00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:32,560
Speaker 1: I've got the keys, I've got access, i know where

409
00:17:32,560 --> 00:17:34,919
Speaker 1: everything is, and i know what's going on, you know.

410
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,200
Speaker 1: But that's the vunctures and that's what.

411
00:17:38,119 --> 00:17:40,080
Speaker 4: I deal with. And I've got to say.

412
00:17:40,400 --> 00:17:43,160
Speaker 1: There was a lady on her deathbed in the hospital

413
00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:45,600
Speaker 1: and her son walked in while I'm talking to her,

414
00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:48,240
Speaker 1: trying to take the rings off her finger while she's

415
00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:50,840
Speaker 1: still alive. Oh so you could hock them because he

416
00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:53,199
Speaker 1: can't get his car going and shit like that. And

417
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:58,000
Speaker 1: I'm like, get out, you're kidding me, Like, seriously, it's awful.

418
00:17:58,080 --> 00:18:01,600
Speaker 2: Do you think though you see the worst in people

419
00:18:01,640 --> 00:18:04,439
Speaker 2: and that actually, most most people are not like that.

420
00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:08,240
Speaker 1: Most people aren't like that. I just see the worst

421
00:18:08,280 --> 00:18:12,159
Speaker 1: in certain people that are like that. And you know,

422
00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:15,720
Speaker 1: I've always said since twenty eight een when I started

423
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:18,520
Speaker 1: this job, is where there's a will, there's a relative.

424
00:18:21,960 --> 00:18:25,000
Speaker 2: But because you give quite a lot of examples in

425
00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:28,879
Speaker 2: the box of those vultures, and I completely believe you.

426
00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:31,880
Speaker 2: But then you know, my own mother's in private care

427
00:18:31,920 --> 00:18:33,439
Speaker 2: at the moment because it has to be, you know,

428
00:18:33,840 --> 00:18:36,200
Speaker 2: And and I'm near every day, and I just see

429
00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,840
Speaker 2: the most lovely people.

430
00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:41,399
Speaker 1: And oh there's some beautiful people, even the staff of

431
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:44,439
Speaker 1: beautiful people that look after these people. I mean, I

432
00:18:44,560 --> 00:18:47,000
Speaker 1: could not do what half of them do because they're

433
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:50,400
Speaker 1: just so they're blessed people in a way that it's

434
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:54,400
Speaker 1: just ridiculous that they have their own lives, their own torments,

435
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:57,800
Speaker 1: their own troubles, their own everything, financials, whatever it is.

436
00:18:58,320 --> 00:19:01,080
Speaker 1: And yet they still go to a place and care.

437
00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:02,040
Speaker 4: For people like your mother.

438
00:19:02,359 --> 00:19:05,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, and with a smile and as big as I

439
00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:09,440
Speaker 1: just don't know shit. They need they need more than

440
00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:11,280
Speaker 1: what they get, and they need a lot of support,

441
00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:13,640
Speaker 1: and they need more money, and they need help because

442
00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:17,679
Speaker 1: you know, one lady, and a quick example is one lady.

443
00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:19,600
Speaker 4: I mean palliative care. She's a nurse.

444
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:21,920
Speaker 1: She's looking after like a ward of say five to

445
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:23,480
Speaker 1: ten people, she's looking after.

446
00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:24,879
Speaker 4: She left.

447
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:27,359
Speaker 1: I'm about to leave, and I go downstairs. She's on

448
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,920
Speaker 1: the phone standing next to my car, near my car,

449
00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:33,360
Speaker 1: and she's going, oh, please don't leave me. I love

450
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:35,880
Speaker 1: you so much, Please please be home when I get home.

451
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:39,440
Speaker 1: And I'm like, fuck, this lady's gone through all that,

452
00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:41,760
Speaker 1: and then she's got to go back after that phone

453
00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:43,040
Speaker 1: call and look after the dying.

454
00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:44,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, holy shit.

455
00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:46,960
Speaker 2: It's got so much going on in her own personal life.

456
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:48,600
Speaker 2: And we don't see them like that, do we. We

457
00:19:48,640 --> 00:19:51,439
Speaker 2: see the uniform. We're just like, well, you are you know,

458
00:19:51,480 --> 00:19:53,480
Speaker 2: you are here to care for that's.

459
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:54,439
Speaker 4: Right, and you look after it.

460
00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:56,840
Speaker 1: And some people will treat them like that. And so, hey,

461
00:19:56,880 --> 00:19:58,680
Speaker 1: you're here to care for my mom or my dad,

462
00:19:58,920 --> 00:20:01,520
Speaker 1: bloody look after him. What do you doing forgetting that

463
00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:04,600
Speaker 1: they're actually people too, you know, Yeah, they've got life.

464
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:06,199
Speaker 3: And there is something in there.

465
00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:09,440
Speaker 2: In my West Auckland we have a rather big Croatian

466
00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:13,160
Speaker 2: community who are freaking fantastic. And I did an initiative

467
00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:15,160
Speaker 2: once where I felt we needed to care for our careers,

468
00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:18,480
Speaker 2: so they would do all this baking for our doctors.

469
00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:20,800
Speaker 1: That's beautiful because.

470
00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:23,840
Speaker 2: They're amazing cooks and they loved it right, But it

471
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:25,800
Speaker 2: was like, yes, exactly what you said. How are we

472
00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,600
Speaker 2: caring for the people that we desperately need to care

473
00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:29,000
Speaker 2: for us?

474
00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:29,920
Speaker 4: Exactly?

475
00:20:30,119 --> 00:20:32,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, Yeah, it's gone about.

476
00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:37,080
Speaker 2: Hey, so you're often well sometimes asked to do illegal stuff.

477
00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:39,760
Speaker 2: Like one person wanted you to burn their money, didn't they.

478
00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:40,800
Speaker 5: Yeah.

479
00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:46,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, in Australia it's illegal to burn any currency, huh,

480
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:48,480
Speaker 1: but it's not illegal to bury it. And when I

481
00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:50,919
Speaker 1: let him know this side of the law and what

482
00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:53,760
Speaker 1: was going on, he said, well, bury it, and I

483
00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:55,359
Speaker 1: want you to find a great place to bury it.

484
00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:57,199
Speaker 1: And I'm like, well, where the fuck am I going

485
00:20:57,240 --> 00:20:59,280
Speaker 1: to bury this stuff? That no one's going to find.

486
00:20:59,840 --> 00:21:02,399
Speaker 1: And it came to me at another funeral when I

487
00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:05,639
Speaker 1: was actually standing at the grave site and I'm looking

488
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:08,560
Speaker 1: down at the graves, and I went, holy shit, I

489
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:10,480
Speaker 1: wonder if I could jump in there, dig a hole

490
00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:12,239
Speaker 1: and bury what I need to and then wait for

491
00:21:12,280 --> 00:21:14,200
Speaker 1: my client to go on top and then him buried,

492
00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:16,440
Speaker 1: and and behold I could, and I.

493
00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:20,520
Speaker 2: Did, wow wow, because people throw some weird shit and

494
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:22,800
Speaker 2: with the coffin that sort of stuff, like, you know,

495
00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:26,600
Speaker 2: my brother died, we would like his mate. So we

496
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:28,520
Speaker 2: were all something, you know, standing and crying, and the

497
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:30,960
Speaker 2: next thing you hear this clunk, you know, and like

498
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:32,760
Speaker 2: we said we want and it was his mates were

499
00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:34,240
Speaker 2: throwing and cans of line.

500
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:35,400
Speaker 3: Read yeah exactly.

501
00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:35,800
Speaker 4: Yeah.

502
00:21:36,600 --> 00:21:39,639
Speaker 1: I go to viewing some place items in coffins all

503
00:21:39,680 --> 00:21:42,359
Speaker 1: the time, you know. And I pin pricked the body

504
00:21:42,359 --> 00:21:44,639
Speaker 1: because people are petrified of being buried alive.

505
00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:47,719
Speaker 2: No, I mean, hold on a minute, I don't think

506
00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,840
Speaker 2: we were got there, so you so what So I'm

507
00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:54,280
Speaker 2: die and I'm going to pay you to pin prick me.

508
00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:55,640
Speaker 4: Yeah.

509
00:21:55,680 --> 00:21:59,879
Speaker 1: Look, my client was petrified being cremated alive, and he

510
00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:03,879
Speaker 1: needed to be pinpricked because he said, please, please, please

511
00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:06,320
Speaker 1: make sure I'm dead. He said, treat my body as

512
00:22:06,359 --> 00:22:09,199
Speaker 1: a print pincushion. And I'm like, how the fuck am

513
00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:11,520
Speaker 1: I going to do that? But I found a way.

514
00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:12,119
Speaker 4: Yeah.

515
00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:15,439
Speaker 1: I had a couple of minutes at viewing personal personal minutes,

516
00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:18,800
Speaker 1: and I had a video myself doing what I did.

517
00:22:18,840 --> 00:22:20,840
Speaker 4: And yeah, it's one of those things.

518
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:23,199
Speaker 2: Okay, tell them then about the guy that wanted them.

519
00:22:23,480 --> 00:22:27,160
Speaker 2: He wanted a phone, wasn't it? So he literally in

520
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:28,840
Speaker 2: case he got very live so he could.

521
00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:30,680
Speaker 3: I don't know how he was going to ring so much.

522
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:32,199
Speaker 4: Oh, He's not the only one that's happened.

523
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:36,240
Speaker 1: I've probably done probably about thirteen to fortyen and those

524
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:39,159
Speaker 1: now where I placed it a phone in the coffin

525
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:42,919
Speaker 1: because the people are either petrified or waking up, and

526
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:45,080
Speaker 1: they've got their phone, not so much to call, but

527
00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:47,639
Speaker 1: they've got a torch, they've got memory, photos, videos and

528
00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:48,080
Speaker 1: all that.

529
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:48,600
Speaker 4: Type of stuff.

530
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:50,760
Speaker 1: Okay, I thought, Okay, that's fair.

531
00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:53,720
Speaker 4: I can understand that other people will take it.

532
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:57,160
Speaker 1: Even though I've what the browser and everything I've tried

533
00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:59,159
Speaker 1: to do for them, they still want to take it

534
00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 1: with them just in case.

535
00:23:00,560 --> 00:23:00,960
Speaker 3: Yeah.

536
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:06,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, you here was me saying I had no secrets,

537
00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:08,320
Speaker 2: and then I was like, would I really want someone

538
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:10,160
Speaker 2: going through my phone when I died?

539
00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:12,399
Speaker 4: Well, there you go.

540
00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:15,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, not that I think there's anything that interesting, but

541
00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:18,320
Speaker 2: it's just like out of context and all that crap. Okay,

542
00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:20,520
Speaker 2: here we go, and then I'm going to wind this

543
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:22,840
Speaker 2: up so we can go into the advice segment, because

544
00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:25,040
Speaker 2: you've got to have so much good advice.

545
00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:30,280
Speaker 3: I loved the bit on ESH traveler. Would you mind?

546
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:34,600
Speaker 2: Would you mind explaining to people about that and about

547
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:38,200
Speaker 2: what you did? Because I can't give me I keep

548
00:23:38,240 --> 00:23:41,520
Speaker 2: thinking about it and I'm not Yeah, I'm with you, though,

549
00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:45,200
Speaker 2: I'm trying my ashes at sea because I'm an absolute

550
00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:47,359
Speaker 2: ocean worshiper.

551
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:50,320
Speaker 3: But tell me about ash Traveler.

552
00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:51,160
Speaker 2: Yeah.

553
00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:54,520
Speaker 4: So a gentleman came to me a while ago now

554
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:55,400
Speaker 4: and he said, look.

555
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:56,880
Speaker 1: You know, I want to travel the world. I want

556
00:23:56,880 --> 00:23:59,119
Speaker 1: my ashes to travel the world. And I set up

557
00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:00,679
Speaker 1: this whole thing for it. And then he said, you

558
00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:03,119
Speaker 1: know what, No, I don't now, and I said, okay,

559
00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:05,800
Speaker 1: it's up to you. People can change their mind anytime.

560
00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:08,639
Speaker 1: But it couldn't get out of my head. I couldn't

561
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:10,359
Speaker 1: get it out of my head, and I kept thinking,

562
00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:12,200
Speaker 1: what can I do for my dad.

563
00:24:12,240 --> 00:24:13,480
Speaker 4: I've had his ashes.

564
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:16,720
Speaker 1: For like thirty years, sitting in certain places in my garage,

565
00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:18,399
Speaker 1: your house, and I just forget about him.

566
00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:19,960
Speaker 4: And then two years later I see him again to

567
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:21,160
Speaker 4: go shit, they're still there.

568
00:24:22,359 --> 00:24:25,800
Speaker 1: And then I came up with the idea ash traveler,

569
00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:30,840
Speaker 1: and I placed my dad in four flasks like drinking

570
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:33,560
Speaker 1: flass port flasks, and I sealed them. But on the

571
00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:37,200
Speaker 1: inscription I said, look, if you find me along your travels,

572
00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:39,879
Speaker 1: so either be it wherever you are, place me on

573
00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:43,439
Speaker 1: a train, plane or bus or wherever, and leave me

574
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:44,840
Speaker 1: for the next to do the same.

575
00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:46,800
Speaker 4: And so I sent him all over the world.

576
00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:50,080
Speaker 1: I posted one to Island, England, to America and one

577
00:24:50,119 --> 00:24:53,800
Speaker 1: in Australia. Well, the American one they didn't like him,

578
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:59,399
Speaker 1: so they sent him back. So what I did is

579
00:24:59,440 --> 00:25:01,879
Speaker 1: I I was at the truck stop one day and

580
00:25:01,920 --> 00:25:04,240
Speaker 1: I went so I spoke to this guy and I said,

581
00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:06,120
Speaker 1: we're you're off to him mate. He goes Western Australia,

582
00:25:06,160 --> 00:25:09,119
Speaker 1: and I said, from Queensland and Western that's a nice trip.

583
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:11,560
Speaker 1: The old man's probably not been there before. So I

584
00:25:11,640 --> 00:25:14,040
Speaker 1: stuck him on the on the truck just placed him

585
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:17,199
Speaker 1: in there. And off he went. Wow, they're all flating

586
00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:17,800
Speaker 1: around now.

587
00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:20,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, so someone would love that, Aye to think that

588
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:23,840
Speaker 2: they're just out there, you know, and just still on

589
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:26,840
Speaker 2: this still on this journey of life or something like that,

590
00:25:26,880 --> 00:25:29,160
Speaker 2: which is Okay, what do you think is the most

591
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:30,879
Speaker 2: outrageous thing someone has asked you to do?

592
00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:33,880
Speaker 4: I definitely pin pricked. The body has to.

593
00:25:33,840 --> 00:25:38,200
Speaker 3: Be Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely that is weird.

594
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:42,200
Speaker 1: Besides, you know, you know, I haven't done it yet,

595
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:44,000
Speaker 1: but I have got a request, and he's paid a

596
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:46,960
Speaker 1: deposit for me to go to the viewing, strip him naked,

597
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:49,840
Speaker 1: flip him over and write kiss this on his ass.

598
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 4: When all his family come in to view him, that's

599
00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:53,600
Speaker 4: what they see.

600
00:25:54,119 --> 00:25:58,800
Speaker 2: It's funny, you know, got on him. You've tuned request

601
00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:00,760
Speaker 2: down as zer a line that you won't cross.

602
00:26:02,359 --> 00:26:02,560
Speaker 1: Yeah.

603
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:04,080
Speaker 4: I wait to act for a third party.

604
00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:06,120
Speaker 1: So if you were to engage me and say, look,

605
00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:08,680
Speaker 1: I want you to crash my mum's funeral, No, if

606
00:26:08,720 --> 00:26:11,359
Speaker 1: your mum engaged me, yes, And I will not do

607
00:26:11,400 --> 00:26:14,000
Speaker 1: a third party because it's too hard to find the truths.

608
00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:17,080
Speaker 1: I'd rather go direct to the person and the source

609
00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:19,359
Speaker 1: and say okay, well you've done this, You've done that. Great,

610
00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:21,280
Speaker 1: we can go on that and I can look into.

611
00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:22,359
Speaker 4: It a third party.

612
00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:24,439
Speaker 1: If you say crash my mum's funeral and tell us

613
00:26:24,480 --> 00:26:26,800
Speaker 1: she's a bit, well that's you thinking she's a bit.

614
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:28,840
Speaker 1: She might have been a lovely lady to a million

615
00:26:28,880 --> 00:26:32,280
Speaker 1: other people, you know, let me hear from her. So yeah, the.

616
00:26:32,320 --> 00:26:35,760
Speaker 3: Third party, and you won't break the law, right, I walk.

617
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:38,239
Speaker 4: A very fine line, but I won't break it.

618
00:26:38,280 --> 00:26:39,480
Speaker 3: No, no, no, no.

619
00:26:40,280 --> 00:26:43,439
Speaker 2: Have you thought about franchising, because I was just thinking

620
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:45,560
Speaker 2: we need one in New Zealand at least.

621
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:48,600
Speaker 4: Oh, yeah, I travel, I do. Yeah.

622
00:26:48,720 --> 00:26:52,400
Speaker 1: But my problem is and I've been Look, I've been

623
00:26:52,440 --> 00:26:55,000
Speaker 1: offered a lot of money and a lot of the

624
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:57,600
Speaker 1: ideas have come forward to franchise and do this as

625
00:26:57,640 --> 00:27:01,920
Speaker 1: a business globally. But my integrity is everything. And you

626
00:27:01,960 --> 00:27:04,160
Speaker 1: can steal from the dead so easily.

627
00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:06,840
Speaker 4: In this job. You get paid up front.

628
00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:09,360
Speaker 1: Mine goes into a trust and it gets released per

629
00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:12,680
Speaker 1: job I do. Other could set it up and take

630
00:27:12,720 --> 00:27:14,639
Speaker 1: the money and not even do it well.

631
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:16,399
Speaker 2: And even as we were saying, the guy that wanted

632
00:27:16,480 --> 00:27:20,600
Speaker 2: his money booned or buried or you know whatever, how

633
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:22,600
Speaker 2: how do you know that it's been done? And they

634
00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:24,080
Speaker 2: haven't decentially taken the money.

635
00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:24,680
Speaker 4: That's right.

636
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:27,359
Speaker 1: And I get paid very well, very well, so I

637
00:27:27,359 --> 00:27:28,840
Speaker 1: don't need to worry about that.

638
00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:32,480
Speaker 3: Well, and you've got your own integraty, right. I couldn't live.

639
00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 1: Well without without the integrity. I mean, it'd be a

640
00:27:35,280 --> 00:27:37,719
Speaker 1: ship job. I mean, I've got to do it with

641
00:27:38,040 --> 00:27:40,880
Speaker 1: the integral part because it's an ongoing job. I didn't

642
00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:42,800
Speaker 1: realize it was going to be like it is, and

643
00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:45,880
Speaker 1: now it's just I'm delivering gifts from the afterlife now,

644
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:49,840
Speaker 1: going to people's places and doing things that unimaginable and

645
00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:52,560
Speaker 1: it's just so beautiful and it's so nice, and that's

646
00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:55,920
Speaker 1: I wanted to keep going. But obviously, one day I'm

647
00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:58,000
Speaker 1: going to die, and I don't know if it will

648
00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:00,440
Speaker 1: continue or not. I've got to put something in where

649
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:02,480
Speaker 1: the dead will not get ripped off.

650
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:05,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, and not easy. Okay, We're going to come back.

651
00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:08,240
Speaker 2: Shortly with Bill, and we're going to go get a

652
00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:11,280
Speaker 2: bit deeper and and talk about what you've learned from

653
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:14,399
Speaker 2: the dying, and also heps give some advice on people

654
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:15,760
Speaker 2: can actually get on with living.

655
00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:30,000
Speaker 3: We'll be right there. So Bill, your job.

656
00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:32,840
Speaker 2: Would give great insight into death and dying. I mean

657
00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 2: you're you're speaking with people that are dying on a

658
00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 2: regular basis, right, correct, Yes, it is there a common denominator,

659
00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:45,840
Speaker 2: Is there is? I mean you say you can physically

660
00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:50,040
Speaker 2: see it in people. Yeah, But is there a common

661
00:28:50,360 --> 00:28:54,160
Speaker 2: philosophy or something that we go through or are all

662
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:54,960
Speaker 2: people different?

663
00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:56,400
Speaker 4: Now?

664
00:28:56,560 --> 00:28:59,640
Speaker 1: I think there is one common denominator, and that would

665
00:28:59,680 --> 00:29:03,719
Speaker 1: be that it when people come to the realization that

666
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:08,360
Speaker 1: the end is near and there's no going back, the

667
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:11,720
Speaker 1: fear of death is no longer there. It's the fear

668
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:15,040
Speaker 1: of leaving the loved ones behind that is the biggest

669
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,480
Speaker 1: common denominator. It's the fear of leaving those behind. It's

670
00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:19,320
Speaker 1: not nothing else.

671
00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:20,640
Speaker 4: Death is just death.

672
00:29:20,680 --> 00:29:24,040
Speaker 1: It's going to happen, it's inevitable. And they don't care

673
00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:26,400
Speaker 1: where they're going or what's going to happen after life.

674
00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:28,640
Speaker 1: They just care about their loved ones and if they're

675
00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:30,640
Speaker 1: going to be all right. Yeah, and that's the most

676
00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:31,200
Speaker 1: common thing.

677
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 3: Yeah.

678
00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, as some people matter of fact, and

679
00:29:35,960 --> 00:29:38,480
Speaker 2: it just is what it is. And I suppose it's

680
00:29:38,560 --> 00:29:42,040
Speaker 2: at different stages, right. Other people more into the philosophy

681
00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:44,680
Speaker 2: around it or reliving their lives or.

682
00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:46,720
Speaker 3: I don't know. I was stealing with someone in a

683
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:47,320
Speaker 3: few weeks ago.

684
00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:49,920
Speaker 2: I used to do a lot of palliative care actually,

685
00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:52,760
Speaker 2: and I just found some people, you know, I'd say,

686
00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 2: is there anything that you want? And they go, no,

687
00:29:54,600 --> 00:30:00,120
Speaker 2: I'm done, I'm done, you know, you know, just is

688
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:01,960
Speaker 2: that worth me, dear? And it'll be nice, you know,

689
00:30:02,160 --> 00:30:04,400
Speaker 2: And then others want to really tell you about their

690
00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:07,280
Speaker 2: whole lives, and you know, like it's next.

691
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:10,720
Speaker 1: I think the stage for sure, you know, there are stages.

692
00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:13,160
Speaker 1: I mean, I've sat with one man that was only

693
00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:15,200
Speaker 1: thirty two years of age, and it was the most

694
00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:18,280
Speaker 1: traumatic time I've ever spent doing this was with him.

695
00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:22,080
Speaker 4: He didn't want to die. He was I don't want

696
00:30:22,120 --> 00:30:24,440
Speaker 4: to die. He was screaming, I don't want to go.

697
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:25,240
Speaker 4: I don't want to die.

698
00:30:25,360 --> 00:30:27,479
Speaker 1: I thirty two, I've got a family, I've just had

699
00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 1: a little boy. I don't want to die. And it

700
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:36,040
Speaker 1: was it was gut wrenching because he was dying. And

701
00:30:36,120 --> 00:30:39,360
Speaker 1: he went within two weeks and he just everything he

702
00:30:39,440 --> 00:30:42,240
Speaker 1: tried to do just didn't work and he died, you know,

703
00:30:42,320 --> 00:30:43,719
Speaker 1: and it was a terrible feeling.

704
00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:46,720
Speaker 3: Yeah that sucks same big time.

705
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:50,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, no, it really does I want to talk

706
00:30:50,840 --> 00:30:53,200
Speaker 2: about dear clutter in your life? That's what I'm calling it,

707
00:30:53,840 --> 00:30:57,440
Speaker 2: because ironically reading your book, you know, literally I cleaned

708
00:30:57,480 --> 00:30:59,960
Speaker 2: out my mother's place, you know, three weeks ago. Who

709
00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:07,000
Speaker 2: request I'd like to say, beautiful. Yeah, but man, it's

710
00:31:07,080 --> 00:31:10,720
Speaker 2: just so hard watching all of those memories and you

711
00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:12,719
Speaker 2: know what I mean, and you're just like, and it's

712
00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:14,800
Speaker 2: almost harder when they're alive, right, because you're trying to

713
00:31:15,440 --> 00:31:18,000
Speaker 2: do that. But I just did. It really made me

714
00:31:18,040 --> 00:31:20,320
Speaker 2: and my husband look at our lives and just go, God,

715
00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:21,880
Speaker 2: it's just material stuff.

716
00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:24,920
Speaker 4: And this is what I guess.

717
00:31:24,920 --> 00:31:27,240
Speaker 1: A great thing, a good feeling for me is that

718
00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:30,640
Speaker 1: globally people are talking about death in a good way,

719
00:31:30,800 --> 00:31:31,440
Speaker 1: not a bad way.

720
00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:33,640
Speaker 4: Now. I sort of opened a few doors.

721
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:37,920
Speaker 1: And the deep cluttering for me was I got rid

722
00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:41,000
Speaker 1: of probably eighty percent of our shit because we didn't

723
00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:41,360
Speaker 1: need it.

724
00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:42,160
Speaker 4: It was just crap.

725
00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:42,640
Speaker 3: Yeah.

726
00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:45,440
Speaker 1: And it was the same with friends that were hanging

727
00:31:45,480 --> 00:31:48,040
Speaker 1: on that weren't really friends and people that you know,

728
00:31:48,080 --> 00:31:50,200
Speaker 1: were dragging you down. I just got rid of everything

729
00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 1: and everyone in my life that I just didn't need

730
00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:55,400
Speaker 1: and they were sucking the life out of me, or

731
00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:57,440
Speaker 1: things were sucking the life out of me, and I thought,

732
00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:00,360
Speaker 1: you know what, I don't want my children to go

733
00:32:00,440 --> 00:32:02,320
Speaker 1: through my ship and say do we keep this, do

734
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:02,680
Speaker 1: we throw?

735
00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:04,720
Speaker 4: Do we give it a sound? Ways? I want to

736
00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:05,800
Speaker 4: do it, so I'm.

737
00:32:06,680 --> 00:32:08,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, And it's amazing.

738
00:32:08,600 --> 00:32:10,680
Speaker 2: I've only done three rooms in my own house so

739
00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:14,120
Speaker 2: far because I'm preserved, so I've got a lot more

740
00:32:14,160 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 2: to do, trust me.

741
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:17,160
Speaker 3: But man, I felt good.

742
00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:21,520
Speaker 4: You know what, It's empowering. It was, that's for sure.

743
00:32:21,600 --> 00:32:24,000
Speaker 2: And I mean, you know that the Japanese woman that

744
00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:26,920
Speaker 2: told us all to you know what's her name? Anyway,

745
00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:30,440
Speaker 2: You know you're supposed to look at something and say,

746
00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:32,440
Speaker 2: am I really holding onto this because it should be

747
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:32,800
Speaker 2: and all.

748
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:33,320
Speaker 3: That sort of stuff.

749
00:32:33,480 --> 00:32:36,280
Speaker 2: But it's actually better than that. It is it's taking

750
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:38,240
Speaker 2: more power of your life.

751
00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:41,120
Speaker 1: It's all about power. That's exactly what it's about. It's

752
00:32:41,160 --> 00:32:44,360
Speaker 1: the power within yourself to go. You know what, I'm

753
00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:46,040
Speaker 1: going to get rid of this. I'm going to do it.

754
00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:48,800
Speaker 1: It's my life. I bought it, I'm leaving it, I'm

755
00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:50,760
Speaker 1: losing it, and I'm moving on whatever.

756
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:54,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, because as you say, being one of those kids

757
00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:57,320
Speaker 2: right now at fifty five, but it is it's just

758
00:32:57,440 --> 00:33:00,880
Speaker 2: it's what I'm certainly because I'm not the vulture, and

759
00:33:00,920 --> 00:33:04,480
Speaker 2: so I'm just hating having to make decisions about things

760
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:07,640
Speaker 2: that I knew and know are important to mum, you know,

761
00:33:07,720 --> 00:33:08,160
Speaker 2: And it's.

762
00:33:08,040 --> 00:33:11,800
Speaker 1: Just nice exactly God, And that's the thing. So we

763
00:33:11,840 --> 00:33:13,600
Speaker 1: don't want to do that for our children. We want

764
00:33:13,640 --> 00:33:16,720
Speaker 1: to be able to go without them having that type

765
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:19,080
Speaker 1: of extra hass or strain and all the bullshit that

766
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:19,720
Speaker 1: goes with.

767
00:33:19,720 --> 00:33:23,840
Speaker 2: Death, you know, yeah, absolutely, How can we bring peace

768
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:24,520
Speaker 2: to the dying?

769
00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:26,800
Speaker 3: What do you reckon? I mean, you've sat with a few.

770
00:33:28,880 --> 00:33:34,240
Speaker 1: Uh, yeah, I got to say, there's nothing more comforting

771
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:36,240
Speaker 1: than going and visiting them.

772
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:37,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, being with them.

773
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 1: You don't have to take anything, just take yourself, even

774
00:33:41,960 --> 00:33:43,480
Speaker 1: if it's for a minute, because they're not going to

775
00:33:43,520 --> 00:33:46,320
Speaker 1: stay awake for hours. I mean they sleep a lot,

776
00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:49,240
Speaker 1: or they're you know, drugged up or whatever it is.

777
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:52,240
Speaker 1: But just being there for that presence, not only for them,

778
00:33:52,320 --> 00:33:55,560
Speaker 1: but you sort of feel something about yourself going in there.

779
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:56,640
Speaker 4: You feel good about it.

780
00:33:56,680 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 1: You know you've done something and don't fucking put it

781
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:03,640
Speaker 1: on social medias though. I've just visited Grandma. She's dying,

782
00:34:03,800 --> 00:34:05,440
Speaker 1: and I feel so good visiting her.

783
00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:06,480
Speaker 4: Look how happy she is.

784
00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:09,360
Speaker 1: Well, fuck you just do it yourself, don't play it

785
00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:12,360
Speaker 1: around the world. I don't video any of the stuff.

786
00:34:12,400 --> 00:34:15,759
Speaker 1: I do video what I have to do legally, and

787
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:18,400
Speaker 1: it's kept on my phone or was in a secret place.

788
00:34:18,600 --> 00:34:21,000
Speaker 1: But I will not go in like these people want

789
00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:23,480
Speaker 1: me to do. Now from LA they say, oh, we

790
00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:26,759
Speaker 1: want you to record going, and no, what the fuck

791
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:30,120
Speaker 1: is not my funeral. I'm not about it. I'm not

792
00:34:30,160 --> 00:34:33,640
Speaker 1: about to expose everybody to that name. And then people go,

793
00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:36,200
Speaker 1: imagine how many likes you get? Oh, fuck you and

794
00:34:36,239 --> 00:34:36,759
Speaker 1: your likes.

795
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:37,319
Speaker 4: You know what.

796
00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:39,280
Speaker 1: I had a lady that had two hundred and fifty

797
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:43,480
Speaker 1: thousand followers, and she had thousands and hundreds of thousands

798
00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:46,040
Speaker 1: of friends, and I went to her funeral and six

799
00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:47,000
Speaker 1: turned up.

800
00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:47,720
Speaker 4: Six.

801
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:53,920
Speaker 2: Wow, it's just so false, just not real bullshit. Yeah yeah,

802
00:34:53,960 --> 00:34:57,160
Speaker 2: and how lonely that some Yeah yeah.

803
00:34:57,000 --> 00:35:00,719
Speaker 1: I've got a fake, fake, pretentious life that just nothing there.

804
00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:02,239
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.

805
00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:02,600
Speaker 6: No.

806
00:35:02,680 --> 00:35:05,000
Speaker 2: I tuned up to see I go most days, and

807
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:06,879
Speaker 2: I turned up yesterday and I sat down and then

808
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:10,239
Speaker 2: after five minutes she said, oh, I'm really wanting to

809
00:35:10,320 --> 00:35:11,520
Speaker 2: catch up with one of the other women.

810
00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:15,640
Speaker 3: Here you can go. Now, Yeah, that's cool. I was

811
00:35:16,920 --> 00:35:19,800
Speaker 3: all right then, mum, thanks, And.

812
00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:21,400
Speaker 4: That's the thing. But at least she made the effort.

813
00:35:21,560 --> 00:35:23,560
Speaker 1: A lot of people don't even make the effort. They

814
00:35:23,600 --> 00:35:26,080
Speaker 1: just sit there and they go, oh, you know Jack's

815
00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:27,919
Speaker 1: doing Jack did last week?

816
00:35:27,920 --> 00:35:28,040
Speaker 4: Oh?

817
00:35:28,120 --> 00:35:28,359
Speaker 2: Fuck?

818
00:35:28,440 --> 00:35:28,680
Speaker 4: Did he?

819
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:31,000
Speaker 1: I saw his daughter on social media saying how good

820
00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:33,240
Speaker 1: he was doing? Yeah, because you saw it on social media.

821
00:35:33,239 --> 00:35:33,879
Speaker 4: A big deal.

822
00:35:34,280 --> 00:35:37,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, it doesn't mean it's fact or truth or you

823
00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:38,440
Speaker 1: know anyway.

824
00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:40,200
Speaker 3: No, I've been reading her your book.

825
00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:49,440
Speaker 4: Okay, what else am I going to do?

826
00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:51,960
Speaker 3: You know, she has a bit of a chuckle. I've

827
00:35:52,000 --> 00:35:54,520
Speaker 3: got to say. I have to beep out the sweary

828
00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:56,880
Speaker 3: woods because my mother wouldn't like that.

829
00:35:56,880 --> 00:36:00,560
Speaker 1: That's okay, Yeah, yeah, send therm my lie and tell

830
00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:05,239
Speaker 1: her that. Yeah. I hope she has a great journey.

831
00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:06,560
Speaker 4: You know what. It's one of.

832
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:09,080
Speaker 1: Those things people say to me, Oh, Bill, what do

833
00:36:09,120 --> 00:36:11,359
Speaker 1: you think the meaning of life is? Well, the meaning

834
00:36:11,360 --> 00:36:14,239
Speaker 1: of life is to avoid fucking death. I don't give

835
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:16,600
Speaker 1: a ship what anybody else says. It's to avoid death.

836
00:36:17,680 --> 00:36:20,120
Speaker 1: And you're going to die, like your mum is going

837
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:22,680
Speaker 1: to die one day at least, you know, look back

838
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:24,719
Speaker 1: and go did I have Yeah, I had a great time.

839
00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:26,120
Speaker 4: If I didn't get out of the bed.

840
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:28,279
Speaker 1: Now, even if you can't or what if you can

841
00:36:28,400 --> 00:36:31,759
Speaker 1: do do something or get just do something that's so

842
00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:33,080
Speaker 1: bizarre and so out there.

843
00:36:34,320 --> 00:36:34,879
Speaker 4: That was cool.

844
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:38,440
Speaker 2: Tell them the story about about the woman and her

845
00:36:38,520 --> 00:36:42,200
Speaker 2: husband had died years ago and her kids are just

846
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:44,440
Speaker 2: kind of dumped her, right, and so she was.

847
00:36:44,440 --> 00:36:46,719
Speaker 4: Just lonely camp event.

848
00:36:46,920 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 2: Yes, go and tell everyone that story, because this is

849
00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:52,000
Speaker 2: the best advice you just said, you know, if you're

850
00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:55,120
Speaker 2: not going to sit there and go, yeah.

851
00:36:54,719 --> 00:36:58,120
Speaker 1: This lady, yeah, you know, she got in contact with

852
00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:00,360
Speaker 1: me and she was all emotional and upset and it

853
00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:02,759
Speaker 1: was more on a PI capacity job she wanted me

854
00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:05,960
Speaker 1: to do because she was getting forced into retirement care

855
00:37:06,120 --> 00:37:08,160
Speaker 1: and she had a house and it was worth a

856
00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:10,880
Speaker 1: bit of money and the two children wanted to they

857
00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:13,160
Speaker 1: were forcing her into care so they could take over

858
00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:15,480
Speaker 1: the house. And I said to her, I said, look,

859
00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:17,600
Speaker 1: you know what, you should get a camp a van

860
00:37:18,080 --> 00:37:20,400
Speaker 1: and take your dead housepin's ashes with you and just

861
00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:21,960
Speaker 1: travel travel Australia.

862
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:23,520
Speaker 4: And she says, oh, I'd love to do that. I

863
00:37:23,640 --> 00:37:25,640
Speaker 4: really could. I said, well, you got your driver's license.

864
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,400
Speaker 4: She's still capable of doing what you want to do.

865
00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:29,600
Speaker 1: You go for a walk down the beach every day.

866
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:32,319
Speaker 1: You're quite fit and capable of doing this, So why

867
00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:34,840
Speaker 1: don't you do it? She says, Oh, you know my kids,

868
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:37,040
Speaker 1: And I said, fuck your kids, s worry about that.

869
00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:39,520
Speaker 1: So I looked into everything for her, and I found

870
00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:41,520
Speaker 1: that she could rent her She could buy a camp

871
00:37:41,520 --> 00:37:46,000
Speaker 1: a vent without any problem at all. The house could

872
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 1: be rented and pay the rest of the mortgage and

873
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:50,759
Speaker 1: the camp event and her travel time and give her

874
00:37:50,760 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 1: a bit of savings.

875
00:37:52,239 --> 00:37:54,520
Speaker 4: And she was like, are you serious, Bill, I said, yeah,

876
00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:55,359
Speaker 4: not a problem at all.

877
00:37:55,560 --> 00:37:57,560
Speaker 1: So she found a camp a van that she do

878
00:37:57,960 --> 00:37:59,320
Speaker 1: and she asked me to go up and have a

879
00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:00,600
Speaker 1: look at it, to look at us.

880
00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:01,759
Speaker 4: Oh shit, this is great.

881
00:38:01,880 --> 00:38:03,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, for sure, let's get our ACQ to look at

882
00:38:03,920 --> 00:38:06,640
Speaker 1: it and get it all done and roadworthy. And it

883
00:38:06,719 --> 00:38:10,320
Speaker 1: was beautiful. And now she's been gone through about it

884
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:12,319
Speaker 1: ain't just over a year now. And every couple of

885
00:38:12,320 --> 00:38:15,359
Speaker 1: months I get a little photo and a text saying, oh,

886
00:38:15,440 --> 00:38:18,080
Speaker 1: I know the sheep shearing shed in Western Australia and

887
00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:20,880
Speaker 1: I'm cooking for thirty people and I'm traveling here and

888
00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:23,200
Speaker 1: traveling there. She got a little kelpie dog that goes

889
00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:25,440
Speaker 1: with her and her husband sitting on the dashboard in

890
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:26,680
Speaker 1: the jar of ashes.

891
00:38:26,719 --> 00:38:32,759
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just beautiful. But kids, her kids are forever saying, yeah,

892
00:38:32,360 --> 00:38:35,640
Speaker 4: you're a bastard what you did to mom. And I'm like, oh,

893
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:37,920
Speaker 4: you know what, it's your mum. You should have bloody

894
00:38:37,920 --> 00:38:38,600
Speaker 4: looked after her.

895
00:38:39,480 --> 00:38:41,520
Speaker 2: And I do love as well as that she you know,

896
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:44,080
Speaker 2: you helped her and she organized the convent, did all that,

897
00:38:44,239 --> 00:38:45,600
Speaker 2: rented the house out and everything.

898
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:47,560
Speaker 3: And then the first of the kids knew about it

899
00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:48,359
Speaker 3: was the first base.

900
00:38:50,320 --> 00:38:52,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly. They had no idea.

901
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:56,239
Speaker 6: Actually there was a police report that they filed a

902
00:38:56,280 --> 00:38:59,120
Speaker 6: report that their mum was missing, and the police were like,

903
00:38:59,239 --> 00:39:04,279
Speaker 6: yoh you can file she ain't missing. Yeah, all of

904
00:39:04,320 --> 00:39:07,360
Speaker 6: a sudden this Facebook post comes up that she's traveling,

905
00:39:07,480 --> 00:39:09,240
Speaker 6: and it was just gold.

906
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:12,840
Speaker 3: I love that. I love that, but it is gosh.

907
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:16,680
Speaker 2: We undervalue older age sometimes though, don't we. And like

908
00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:19,000
Speaker 2: just because I'm doing it with my mum, you know,

909
00:39:19,040 --> 00:39:21,239
Speaker 2: And even yesterday she's like, I don't like that chair

910
00:39:21,280 --> 00:39:22,920
Speaker 2: in my room and they keep putting that cheer back

911
00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:25,760
Speaker 2: in my room, you know, And I said, Actually, mum.

912
00:39:25,600 --> 00:39:27,000
Speaker 3: You're in charge of your life.

913
00:39:27,360 --> 00:39:27,960
Speaker 4: That's right.

914
00:39:28,200 --> 00:39:30,279
Speaker 2: I'm here to support you and love you, and I'll

915
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:31,960
Speaker 2: do whatever you want. But if you don't want that

916
00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:33,839
Speaker 2: cheer in the room, you do not have to have

917
00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:36,560
Speaker 2: that cheer in the Just because you're older and you're

918
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:40,360
Speaker 2: dying doesn't mean actually that's your power.

919
00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:42,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, you know.

920
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:44,600
Speaker 2: And it's just like and I just thought, yeah, we

921
00:39:44,680 --> 00:39:47,880
Speaker 2: just devalue because she's older that she shouldn't have a

922
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:49,799
Speaker 2: choice as to what freaking cheers she is in her room.

923
00:39:49,880 --> 00:39:52,360
Speaker 1: I've never I've never come across elder of you so

924
00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:54,120
Speaker 1: much in my life as I have in the last

925
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:54,880
Speaker 1: couple of years.

926
00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:58,399
Speaker 4: It is just tragic, tragic. Yeah, and I'm not.

927
00:39:58,360 --> 00:40:00,400
Speaker 1: Going to allow it to happen to my off, my

928
00:40:00,440 --> 00:40:03,239
Speaker 1: wife or anybody that I know, because it's just not

929
00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:06,840
Speaker 1: it's not on Just because we're getting older, it doesn't

930
00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:08,719
Speaker 1: mean we're we're dead.

931
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:10,800
Speaker 4: Yeah, we're not dead till we're dead.

932
00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:13,160
Speaker 2: So my advice to people out there is, you know,

933
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:16,360
Speaker 2: if you can't get a bill, do get yourself a champion.

934
00:40:17,239 --> 00:40:19,920
Speaker 3: You know, I know I'm my mother's champion, you know,

935
00:40:20,520 --> 00:40:21,000
Speaker 3: I know.

936
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:23,640
Speaker 1: Exactly, And that's what I tell people.

937
00:40:23,680 --> 00:40:26,000
Speaker 4: Anybody can be a coffin. Anybody.

938
00:40:26,200 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 1: You're a funeral or you're an awake or you're at

939
00:40:28,680 --> 00:40:31,080
Speaker 1: will reading and you're hearing shit that you don't accept

940
00:40:31,200 --> 00:40:34,319
Speaker 1: or you know positively that didn't happen. Stand up and say,

941
00:40:34,360 --> 00:40:37,400
Speaker 1: excuse me, that's not right. My mum was this this,

942
00:40:37,520 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 1: and this She wasn't like you this blake's saying, or

943
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:41,040
Speaker 1: that lady's saying.

944
00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:41,360
Speaker 4: Whatever.

945
00:40:41,520 --> 00:40:44,239
Speaker 1: You know that you can interject it's not you know,

946
00:40:44,920 --> 00:40:45,799
Speaker 1: it's one of those things.

947
00:40:45,920 --> 00:40:50,960
Speaker 3: Good on you the afterlife. Well, we just don't know,

948
00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:54,120
Speaker 3: do we. You've asked. I remember one guy you said,

949
00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:57,640
Speaker 3: you tell me you didn't come back to your.

950
00:40:57,560 --> 00:41:00,040
Speaker 4: Obviously, no one's ever come back to me.

951
00:41:00,160 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 1: But yeah, we all have our own personal thoughts and

952
00:41:03,600 --> 00:41:04,400
Speaker 1: feelings on that.

953
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:06,200
Speaker 4: For me, it's just your dad. You're dad.

954
00:41:06,360 --> 00:41:09,880
Speaker 1: But I mean, obviously you'd like to think that you

955
00:41:09,960 --> 00:41:12,320
Speaker 1: meet up with family and friends and all that shit

956
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:15,720
Speaker 1: at the afterlife party and this and that. But yeah,

957
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:18,680
Speaker 1: I'm not. I'm not going to say whether there is

958
00:41:18,800 --> 00:41:23,880
Speaker 1: or isn't. What I do know is that, yeah, I've

959
00:41:24,200 --> 00:41:27,160
Speaker 1: said quite late lately, I've said a little lot that

960
00:41:27,239 --> 00:41:30,920
Speaker 1: we all live and then we die. So we live

961
00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:34,400
Speaker 1: dying and very few of us die living. Yeah, and

962
00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:37,440
Speaker 1: I'm going to die living yeah yeah.

963
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:37,759
Speaker 3: Yeah.

964
00:41:37,800 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 2: Now I'm going out in a Blazer glory. Don't you

965
00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:43,120
Speaker 2: worry about that. That's it. So I'm quite convinced now

966
00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:45,799
Speaker 2: that this is on after life because my grandmother talked

967
00:41:45,800 --> 00:41:49,839
Speaker 2: about death for twenty years and she was absolutely convinced

968
00:41:49,960 --> 00:41:53,040
Speaker 2: there was reincarnation and absolutely convinced about the afterlife.

969
00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:55,000
Speaker 3: I mean, I'm just obsessed with it.

970
00:41:55,520 --> 00:41:58,560
Speaker 2: And so she promised she would let me know, and

971
00:41:58,640 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 2: so I figure if it was out issue, would let

972
00:42:01,080 --> 00:42:01,279
Speaker 2: me know.

973
00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:05,319
Speaker 1: Yeah, And that's it. I mean, how many people there's

974
00:42:05,320 --> 00:42:07,759
Speaker 1: still people holding their breath waiting for Jesus to come back.

975
00:42:10,560 --> 00:42:14,600
Speaker 1: And I often say to people, you know, especially religious people,

976
00:42:14,640 --> 00:42:15,719
Speaker 1: and I'm not either way.

977
00:42:15,719 --> 00:42:19,480
Speaker 4: I really don't care. I always say that I'm not.

978
00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:24,880
Speaker 1: I'm definitely not religious, but you know, at the same time,

979
00:42:25,719 --> 00:42:29,040
Speaker 1: I do reference, you know, in certain things, like I'll

980
00:42:29,080 --> 00:42:31,319
Speaker 1: say to people, you know, if you don't sin, then

981
00:42:31,400 --> 00:42:36,960
Speaker 1: Jesus died for nothing, you know, So you've got to

982
00:42:37,000 --> 00:42:37,600
Speaker 1: keep him alive.

983
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:40,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, You've got to keep him going.

984
00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:44,440
Speaker 2: Yeah. Them a reason that we're looking up for Alvis though,

985
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:48,520
Speaker 2: as well, well, yeah, why not? So you talked a

986
00:42:48,520 --> 00:42:51,440
Speaker 2: bit about La so As Hollywood after you what do

987
00:42:51,480 --> 00:42:52,399
Speaker 2: you think is going to happen there.

988
00:42:53,680 --> 00:42:57,080
Speaker 1: I'm doing some beautiful things with some great people. I mean,

989
00:42:57,080 --> 00:42:59,239
Speaker 1: it's just all over the world, which is going on

990
00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:03,759
Speaker 1: right now, believe it or not. They're actually just in

991
00:43:03,840 --> 00:43:10,200
Speaker 1: the last week talking to New Zealand and the big

992
00:43:10,239 --> 00:43:14,080
Speaker 1: TV networks over there what they want to do and

993
00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:17,840
Speaker 1: it's really really exciting. So, yeah, we have a producer

994
00:43:17,880 --> 00:43:20,720
Speaker 1: here in Australia that produces your one of your shows

995
00:43:20,760 --> 00:43:23,280
Speaker 1: over there, which is one of the.

996
00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:25,840
Speaker 4: Best sick drama series over there at the moment.

997
00:43:26,640 --> 00:43:29,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, so he's working on that and we've got a

998
00:43:29,400 --> 00:43:32,279
Speaker 1: great cast and crew and everything that.

999
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:35,120
Speaker 3: Yah, so we would play you.

1000
00:43:35,120 --> 00:43:35,520
Speaker 2: You know what.

1001
00:43:36,360 --> 00:43:38,520
Speaker 1: It's one of those things when I first when I

1002
00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:40,560
Speaker 1: very first started this, and they said, oh, you know,

1003
00:43:40,600 --> 00:43:41,840
Speaker 1: it's going to be a movie and this and that.

1004
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:44,560
Speaker 1: Who you want and I said, Ryan Reynolds, Ryan Reynolds

1005
00:43:44,560 --> 00:43:48,280
Speaker 1: would be great, And then all of a sudden, the

1006
00:43:48,320 --> 00:43:50,520
Speaker 1: directors and producers came to me. We all sat down,

1007
00:43:50,560 --> 00:43:54,640
Speaker 1: they said, what about a woman, What about a woman?

1008
00:43:54,719 --> 00:43:55,000
Speaker 4: Yeah?

1009
00:43:55,040 --> 00:43:58,319
Speaker 1: Cool, I's still a woman. And so we've been going

1010
00:43:58,400 --> 00:44:03,839
Speaker 1: that direction lately, and this particular woman who's really hot

1011
00:44:03,880 --> 00:44:08,279
Speaker 1: to trot has said yes, I'm going to do it,

1012
00:44:08,320 --> 00:44:13,600
Speaker 1: so and she also has connections with New Zealand, so yeah,

1013
00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:14,680
Speaker 1: it's going to be interesting.

1014
00:44:14,840 --> 00:44:16,440
Speaker 3: Oh that does sound interesting.

1015
00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:18,319
Speaker 2: Okay, that's a bit of a bit of a watch

1016
00:44:18,400 --> 00:44:19,239
Speaker 2: the Space right.

1017
00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:20,440
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, absolutely.

1018
00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:34,160
Speaker 2: I would love to know what as the best advice

1019
00:44:34,800 --> 00:44:37,160
Speaker 2: you were ever given and who gave it to you.

1020
00:44:39,160 --> 00:44:42,040
Speaker 1: Best advice I was ever given it was many, many

1021
00:44:42,120 --> 00:44:44,239
Speaker 1: years ago, and it was if you always do what

1022
00:44:44,280 --> 00:44:46,919
Speaker 1: you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.

1023
00:44:48,120 --> 00:44:51,040
Speaker 1: And that was given to me by a prison guard

1024
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:54,520
Speaker 1: when I was coming out of prison on my twenty

1025
00:44:54,560 --> 00:44:55,320
Speaker 1: first birthday.

1026
00:44:55,719 --> 00:44:56,120
Speaker 3: Wow.

1027
00:44:56,680 --> 00:44:57,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, it changed my life.

1028
00:44:58,600 --> 00:44:59,600
Speaker 3: That changed your life.

1029
00:44:59,719 --> 00:45:02,799
Speaker 2: And and I mean you've been married for years, right,

1030
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:06,120
Speaker 2: and you've been waiting for you to bring this with

1031
00:45:06,160 --> 00:45:08,160
Speaker 2: your wife for a long time, haven't you.

1032
00:45:08,680 --> 00:45:08,919
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1033
00:45:08,960 --> 00:45:11,240
Speaker 1: I stole a school uniform at the age of fifteen,

1034
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:13,640
Speaker 1: jumped into a school. After being a street kid, I

1035
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:15,480
Speaker 1: wanted to be around kids, and I walked into this

1036
00:45:15,560 --> 00:45:17,960
Speaker 1: school set in this classroom, told the teacher I was

1037
00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:20,640
Speaker 1: a new student. And this girl sitting behind me told

1038
00:45:20,680 --> 00:45:22,719
Speaker 1: her friend that she was going to marry me. Yeah,

1039
00:45:23,280 --> 00:45:24,160
Speaker 1: forty years now.

1040
00:45:24,320 --> 00:45:26,640
Speaker 3: Wow, incredible, incredible.

1041
00:45:28,200 --> 00:45:30,680
Speaker 2: I've done some work with prisoners and that sort of thing,

1042
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:32,719
Speaker 2: and we always said, the way that you can get

1043
00:45:32,760 --> 00:45:34,960
Speaker 2: most of these mean to tune them their lives around

1044
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:36,600
Speaker 2: as the love of a good woman and a baby.

1045
00:45:37,600 --> 00:45:40,880
Speaker 1: Oh, absolutely, without doubt, without doubt. And you know the

1046
00:45:40,920 --> 00:45:43,640
Speaker 1: other thing, you know what I did is I took

1047
00:45:43,680 --> 00:45:45,600
Speaker 1: my shoes off at the front gate and I walked

1048
00:45:45,600 --> 00:45:48,319
Speaker 1: off with a pair of socks. And the prison officer said, hey, Billy,

1049
00:45:48,360 --> 00:45:50,960
Speaker 1: where are you going. I said, I'm going. He says,

1050
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:52,600
Speaker 1: to your shoes and I said, no, they brought me

1051
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:54,399
Speaker 1: in here. There's no way they're going to fucking bring

1052
00:45:54,480 --> 00:45:54,839
Speaker 1: me back.

1053
00:45:55,120 --> 00:45:56,680
Speaker 3: Wow. Wow.

1054
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:01,600
Speaker 2: Okay, this has been an absolutely fascinating chat. Thank you

1055
00:46:01,760 --> 00:46:05,680
Speaker 2: so much for your time today. I'm really excited about

1056
00:46:05,680 --> 00:46:09,480
Speaker 2: what's coming next. Bell's new book, The Afterlife Confessional is

1057
00:46:09,560 --> 00:46:13,439
Speaker 2: out now. I highly highly recommend it. I'm not sure

1058
00:46:13,480 --> 00:46:24,120
Speaker 2: my mother does as she's you know, going to.

1059
00:46:21,320 --> 00:46:23,360
Speaker 4: Get the audible and bleep out.

1060
00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:27,560
Speaker 3: And then she'll be fine.

1061
00:46:27,800 --> 00:46:29,960
Speaker 2: Hey, and that's it for another episode of Asking Anything.

1062
00:46:30,000 --> 00:46:32,560
Speaker 2: If you've enjoyed this episode, please follow Ask Me Anything

1063
00:46:32,560 --> 00:46:35,839
Speaker 2: on iHeartRadio. We'll ever get your podcasts. Just go and

1064
00:46:35,880 --> 00:46:38,279
Speaker 2: listen to some past years. Re listen to Bill because

1065
00:46:38,280 --> 00:46:41,280
Speaker 2: this has been so much fun. I'm Paula, been asking anything.

1066
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:46,560
Speaker 3: Goodbye,