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Speaker 1: Hello, it's Matt Heath here with a massive self source.

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Speaker 1: My number one best selling book, Are Lifeless Punishing Thirteen

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Speaker 1: Ways to Love the Life You Got, is out now.

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Speaker 1: It's the result of a deep dive I took into

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Speaker 1: how to deal with the emotions that make our lives

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Speaker 1: more punishing than they need to be. I reckon, I

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Speaker 1: found a way to live a life less bored, less stressed, angry, worried, annoyed, scared, dissatisfied,

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Speaker 1: and more. Karen Reid wrote, Matt has a hilarious way

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Speaker 1: of articulating an important message, highly valuable advice for anyone.

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Speaker 1: The newsroom described it as good, very good, indeed, and

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Speaker 1: Kitty Book said this is wisdom which could save my

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Speaker 1: teenage son a lot of ants as he negotiates the

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Speaker 1: slings and arrows of adult life. And under jurious Jrmy

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Speaker 1: wells he had met as a deep thinking, highly intelligent

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Speaker 1: human being, which was nice of him. The number one

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Speaker 1: best selling are Lifeless Punishing Thirteen Ways to Love the

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Speaker 1: Life You Got, as available in all good bookstores now.

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Speaker 1: Shocking self source over some of the content on this

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Speaker 1: edition of the Matt and Jerry Daily Bespoke Podcast could

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Speaker 1: be considered lewd by some people view a discretion listen

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Speaker 1: to Christ listen to discretion. Listening discretion is advised.

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Speaker 2: But don't stop it from don't stop that warning from

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Speaker 2: making you listen to it. If you yeah, yeah, okay.

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Speaker 1: And as you listen, and as you listen to this,

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Speaker 1: just maybe take a second to contemplate that this is

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Speaker 1: the as voted by the New Zealand Radio on TV

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Speaker 1: is the best podcast in New Zealand bises it was

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Speaker 1: the tenth of June twenty twenty four. Welcome all the

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Speaker 1: bespokey doggies to the Matter and Jerry Bespoke Daily Podcast.

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Speaker 3: You're right there.

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Speaker 1: She's a rough that I've come brought in to share

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Speaker 1: with you guys.

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Speaker 3: We've a had a bit of a frog in the

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Speaker 3: throat today, even when we thoughtever is.

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Speaker 1: I had the situation yesterday where I sent my girlfriend

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Speaker 1: out to get me some cold rigs to camp back

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Speaker 1: with nothing but night, nothing but night. I need. I

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Speaker 1: wanted the days, no days, and she just put back

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Speaker 1: the nights. I was like, can you just give Why

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Speaker 1: can't I do with these? There's nothing I can do?

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Speaker 3: Do you get rid of her?

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Speaker 1: Or what I was furious. I hope you are. If

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Speaker 1: I hadn't been that, if I hadn't been incapacitated with

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Speaker 1: the illness, I would have.

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Speaker 3: I agree.

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Speaker 1: Did you have any of the nights?

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Speaker 4: No?

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Speaker 1: Well, what's the point of the Knights? Did they have pseudo?

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Speaker 1: The Knights have got Knights weren't too bad. The Knights

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Speaker 1: definitely don't have sudo, but the nights are good for night? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: well it was it was day, okay, day. I was

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Speaker 1: watching that show Eric. Have you seen the show Eric?

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Speaker 1: Sit in New York and the eighties? Eggs bented at

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Speaker 1: Kumberbatch and he's pisting around a pretty decrepit and rundown

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Speaker 1: New York. He's a puppeteer who's an alcoholic and a

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Speaker 1: drug addict on a show that's like Siame Street, but

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Speaker 1: it's called Good Day Sunshine. And his kid gets his

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Speaker 1: kid gets abducted shirt and he's trying to find him

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Speaker 1: through the seedy underbelly of you know, sexual predators and

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Speaker 1: such in nineteen eighties New York. Well, the mayor is

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Speaker 1: trying to clean the place up.

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Speaker 3: Lea's ever listened to the trailer.

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Speaker 4: Forty eight Hours in Seiggur Anderson was last seen around

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Speaker 4: eight am. I worked to school, urging anybody with information,

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Speaker 4: however small, please come forward, pick up them farm and

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Speaker 4: help us bring egg go home.

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Speaker 3: Letting him walk to school, it's not a decision you regret. Okay,

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Speaker 3: that's enough of that. I think he let us could

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Speaker 3: walk to school, So it is a decision he regrets.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he regrets it, and he deals with that decision

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Speaker 1: with the help of crack and that's alcohol while I

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Speaker 1: was trying to search, and he starts hallucinating and stuff.

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Speaker 1: It's really great. It's quite good. I quite liked it.

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Speaker 1: I always wonder what shows I'll watch right through and

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Speaker 1: which ones I start and go there isn't enough in

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Speaker 1: there for me, because this show definitely shoves the brakes

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Speaker 1: on at one point. You know how shows on Netflix

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Speaker 1: they always go and they sort of tell the story,

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Speaker 1: and then I feel like they've got a minimum number

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Speaker 1: of episodes that they have to do, and so there's

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Speaker 1: always a couple of episodes in the middle that you

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Speaker 1: think you could probably probably race through it.

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Speaker 2: You start reaching for your phone a bit more than

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Speaker 2: other ones.

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Speaker 1: And they introduce this other character that's gone my scene

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Speaker 1: just I think to make a statement on how people

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Speaker 1: are more interested in finding white kids than black kids

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Speaker 1: or something like that. Throw that in there just to

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Speaker 1: cover their ass for any accusations of that by people

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Speaker 1: in the media industry or whatever. And you're just like,

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Speaker 1: there's an why are we looking for two kids at

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Speaker 1: this point? Okay? Yeah, it's a bit bit confusing. So

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Speaker 1: have you how do you go with you guys, go

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Speaker 1: with watching stuff and then not looking at your phone

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Speaker 1: at the same time. Anyone, anyone on a Sunday, for example,

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Speaker 1: if you if you're watching something and then I'm getting

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Speaker 1: a lot better at it. I'm doing everything they can

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Speaker 1: not to not to do it. Okay, I'm using the

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Speaker 1: techniques of doctor Judson Brewer and then and trying to

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Speaker 1: ride out my cravings to look at my phone, because

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Speaker 1: if I'm watching Netflix, it should be enough, right, I've

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Speaker 1: talked about this before. Havn't we mash you? Even just

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Speaker 1: eating dinner should be enough, you think so. But we

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Speaker 1: make a delicious dinner and then we've got to go

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Speaker 1: to the couch and then find what to watch while

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Speaker 1: we're eating it. It's like, can't you just you and

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Speaker 1: draw your meal at the table.

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Speaker 3: I get absolutely furious about my and my girlfriend knows this.

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Speaker 3: My girlfriend cannot cannot watch anything without.

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Speaker 2: Okay, calm down, you asked, I've got I've got no

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Speaker 2: issues with that.

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Speaker 1: I've never had I.

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Speaker 3: Never really pick up my phone. I enjoy watching TV

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Speaker 3: shows and movies, so that part's easy for me.

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Speaker 1: I find it really frustrating. This is when I find

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Speaker 1: it really frustrating. If you've gone back to the first

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Speaker 1: episode because you've enjoyed the show, and you've gone, hey,

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Speaker 1: this is actually quite good. I will watch it from

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Speaker 1: the start with you. We'll actually watch it together, right,

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Speaker 1: And then you start watching and they're steering their freaking phone,

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Speaker 1: and then you get you start quizzing them and what

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Speaker 1: they've seen and what they're not and then they're on

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Speaker 1: the back for you in a makeup you're a quiz.

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Speaker 1: But I will.

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Speaker 3: I will admit this that I enjoy consuming content more

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Speaker 3: than most people. So I understand that I'm waterboarding her

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Speaker 3: with some slightly alternative shows that maybe she's not going

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Speaker 3: to enjoy.

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Speaker 1: You'll watch a doco, won't you. I'll I'll watch I'll

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Speaker 1: watch it. I'll watch a docou And it can be

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Speaker 1: a bit challenging for a female.

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Speaker 5: I'm pretty good at things that are on the likes

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Speaker 5: of Netflix and stuff. But I'm recidivous during cricket games

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Speaker 5: of just looking at my phone's different, checking the odds,

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Speaker 5: reading forums about what people think about how far the

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Speaker 5: game's going, seeing what people are commenting on social media,

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Speaker 5: and then.

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Speaker 3: Going, oh, we've got sixty against Afghanistan. That's interesting.

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Speaker 1: I'm not I'm not a looker on social media about

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Speaker 1: what people are saying about the game. When I'm watching

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Speaker 1: the game, I'm not interested.

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Speaker 3: But you're scrolling through instance, is what you're saying.

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Speaker 2: I'll sometimes look at people's Instagram. It's interesting they're in Croatia,

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Speaker 2: that person's oh, that person's gone to France.

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Speaker 1: And only following people on their people say at the moment,

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Speaker 1: it seems like every bloody person seems to be in

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Speaker 1: Europe sunning their bloody Here we are maybe and you're

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Speaker 1: a friend group Jerry and people like mine and meshes

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Speaker 1: friend group. People are doing it tough.

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Speaker 3: What are all your friends? What are all your friends?

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Speaker 1: Here are my people are posting shots at the dump.

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Speaker 1: People have been shutting shots themselves, been thrown out of

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Speaker 1: their houses. The people are posting on Minstagram, just shots

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Speaker 1: of all this stuff on their berm as they they

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Speaker 1: haven't been able to pay their rent.

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Speaker 3: Spooch is in a tent at the moment. Yahoo is

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Speaker 3: an a tent.

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Speaker 2: Well, okay, so they're looking for sympathy, so they're puting

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Speaker 2: sympathy posts.

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Speaker 1: Actually, to be fair, spooches in Europe. At the moment,

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Speaker 1: he's is going up to see his mate Ivan and Georgia.

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Speaker 1: But everybody's I tell you, and it's not.

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Speaker 2: I'm not talking about fancy I'm not talking about fancy

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Speaker 2: pence sort of stuff here. I'm talking about people on

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Speaker 2: their twenties, meshes mates, all of meshes mates, half of

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Speaker 2: the mar meshes.

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Speaker 3: I've made some real money over the last four years.

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Speaker 3: You know they can afford to do that kind of things.

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Speaker 3: For me, I'm pucked up here. I'm not going anyway.

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Speaker 2: International intents, yeah, there's heaps of international intents that seemed

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Speaker 2: to be living the high life.

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Speaker 1: I think it's just that time of year. It must

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Speaker 1: be nice.

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Speaker 3: It's always this time of the year people start pisting

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Speaker 3: overseas with their partners and start what's it called. God,

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Speaker 3: I don't know why I've come up with such a

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Speaker 3: fucking spoon of mass this morning. I don't know why

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Speaker 3: I'm so cranky.

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Speaker 1: If you just if you just hold a second there,

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Speaker 1: we'll come back in just a minute. We'll find out

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Speaker 1: why Mash has got to spoon up his ass. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so just get us through these breaks. I don't make

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Speaker 1: spoon up your asses are saying. It's not what I mean.

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Speaker 1: I not want to put a spoon up your ass.

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Speaker 1: Like you said, it's kind of a good saying, because,

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Speaker 1: like I mean, excuse me. If I'm going to put

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Speaker 1: a spoon up my ass, I'm going to put it

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Speaker 1: up the handle first, not the not the scoop, not

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Speaker 1: the shovel.

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Speaker 3: Do you say the excuse me?

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Speaker 1: A partners you put that up there? Yeah, you excuse me.

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to put it up that way that

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Speaker 1: that rude is holding it up. Yeah, that's the wrong way,

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Speaker 1: I reckon. That's like you're going to get as if

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Speaker 1: you do that, and that's just a tea spoon that

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Speaker 1: rut is holding up the end bloody tablespoon? Would you

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Speaker 1: put a soup spoon up you guys?

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Speaker 3: I hate to do this. I think you might have

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Speaker 3: taken it a bit too literally. Really, what I was

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Speaker 3: saying is I don't know why I've come and so

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Speaker 3: cranky today. I'll be thrown a couple of strays about

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Speaker 3: the phone thing, and I feel bad.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, because I mean, there would be a lot if

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Speaker 1: you came in with an actual spoon up your ass.

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Speaker 1: Yeah I didn't.

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Speaker 3: I didn't come in with an actual spoons a ladle,

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Speaker 3: like a full plastic ladle from Bristos.

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Speaker 1: Okay, if you were going knife, spoon or fork up

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Speaker 1: the ask, you go a sharp sharp knife, the sharp

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Speaker 1: end of it like a like a steak.

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Speaker 3: Now, good question, because the other end is quite round

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Speaker 3: and spoon again.

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Speaker 1: Okay, hold once again, I'm going handle handle fist on that. No, no,

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Speaker 1: you can't go handle fist. So you've got to go.

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Speaker 1: You've got to go that the actual you chinse to in.

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Speaker 1: So it's a butter knife, Like, let's just make it simple.

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Speaker 1: It's a butter knife, a normal fork or just a

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Speaker 1: normal dessert spoon. Okay, So fork has its problem so

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Speaker 1: that you might immediately go for. I wouldn't go for.

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Speaker 1: I never go for. I feel like fork could catch

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Speaker 1: the sides.

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Speaker 3: Look look at us, guys, it looks like it might be.

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Speaker 3: It might be a spoon up the.

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Speaker 1: I think it might be spoon about a bread knife

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Speaker 1: like a butter knife still has the little serrated but

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Speaker 1: and I think that's dangerous to get. And I think

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Speaker 1: even for absolutely no spoon turns out to spoon. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean, none of them are great. Like if I,

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Speaker 1: if I had to choose, I would have I'd go

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Speaker 1: for a chop stick if I could, if you could,

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Speaker 1: if I could, if someone, if someone can, If someone

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Speaker 1: said spoon, knife or chop stick, I wouldn't chopstick or

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Speaker 1: a plastic one.

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Speaker 2: I mean, wouldn't you might get a splinter all because

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Speaker 2: there's actually happens to be some chopsticks in studio.

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Speaker 1: Okay, hey, let's do it, mesh. I wouldn't. I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: put that up my ass. It's a wouldn't. I wouldn't.

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Speaker 1: We've got any warming up from any bone. But guys,

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't. I wouldn't. I wouldn't. I wouldn't put that

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Speaker 1: up my ass. That wouldn't.

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Speaker 3: I shave this down.

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Speaker 1: Let me shave it down. No need to shave it down.

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Speaker 1: I mean, if you can't get that thing up your ass,

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Speaker 1: is something wrong with you and you're getting anything else?

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Speaker 1: If you can't get that up, then nothing's coming out.

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Speaker 1: If you can't get a chopstick up your ass, I'll

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Speaker 1: go on the record and I'll say, if you can't

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Speaker 1: get a chopstick on your ass, and you take it

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Speaker 1: so hard, this might sound gross and like, apologies to

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Speaker 1: people listening. If you if you, if you're listening to

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Speaker 1: this and you you know you don't really like the

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Speaker 1: blue content, then then I'd say turn the podcast off.

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Speaker 1: But has anyone ever tried to get a sticky they've

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Speaker 1: got a situation where they're a bit constipated. Has anyone

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Speaker 1: ever tried to go up there with the chopsticks try

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Speaker 1: and get it out?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 1: What like what sort of like a like a toilet

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Speaker 1: like when you're toilet. Remember that time you're on the

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Speaker 1: morphine for some surgery and you got that that you

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Speaker 1: got that pine cone up there? Oh my god, the

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Speaker 1: pine cone was just I want to kill you to

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Speaker 1: go up there with the chopsticks.

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Speaker 2: The disappointment, Can I just say the disappointment of when

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Speaker 2: I finally passed that I'm going to inverted commace pine

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Speaker 2: cone after having surgery and being on more for a

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Speaker 2: couple of weeks than punk.

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Speaker 1: It was so tiny what came out. I was like,

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Speaker 1: well that was it. So does the morphine shrink your aushole? No,

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Speaker 1: the morphine just compounds everything in your bowels cemented year

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Speaker 1: down and it's and it takes all of the moisture

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Speaker 1: out of it.

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Speaker 3: What does it do that selfish?

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Speaker 2: I'm not sure, But this time around when I had

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Speaker 2: my latest operation, I was so focused on that in

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Speaker 2: preparation hitting in. I was just five to five a fiber.

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Speaker 2: I was on the heavily on the kiwi fruit. I

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Speaker 2: was kiwi fruit just all the way through that. Well

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Speaker 2: not that actually not allowed to do anything. But then

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Speaker 2: the next day and then everything was fine, No problems,

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Speaker 2: didn't problems. You didn't go up there with some chopsticks,

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Speaker 2: no need?

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Speaker 1: Why I didn't?

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Speaker 3: Is this what you do when you get constabated?

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Speaker 1: I'm just wondering. I don't know that, because you can

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Speaker 1: do it, because you could get it up there very

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Speaker 1: easily by put keeping them keeping the chop sticks together,

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Speaker 1: and then you could pincer and you could turn around. Hey,

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Speaker 1: we should call this podcast no fork or spoon. And

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Speaker 1: then people be like, oh, this is going to be

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Speaker 1: a nice little interesting podcast, and then will gozump them,

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Speaker 1: and they'll be surprised when they find out how many

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Speaker 1: people that listen to a podcast a lot. When they

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Speaker 1: read no fork and spoon will immediately think they're going

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Speaker 1: to talk about putting those up there there.

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Speaker 2: I like the fact that we love the chopstick option, though,

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Speaker 2: which is obviously opening us up culturally, makes a lot more.

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Speaker 3: I think it's too. I think it's I think what's

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Speaker 3: problematic about bringing in the chopstick though? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Is that no shit?

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Speaker 3: You're going to do the chopstick?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true. It's a good one. Don't break the

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Speaker 1: chopstick off. Okay, here's here's a different good point. Here's

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Speaker 1: a different thing. Read hot poker, pineapple.

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Speaker 4: Or or like.

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Speaker 1: Or a cat or a cat's paw. I was gonna

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Speaker 1: say Barbie doll, but cat's paw. Everyone's going to go

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Speaker 1: cats pour a cat's paw? Is it still on the cat? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: From the cat, but I'm not. You can remove it

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Speaker 1: from the cat if you want to. But imagine imagine

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Speaker 1: the claws on that thing. Ye, cat's poor to get

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Speaker 1: that back out, it gets poor. So cat's poor. Red

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Speaker 1: hot poker or what I want to do? My one?

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Speaker 1: I want to get your cats poor out of it,

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Speaker 1: because I feel like this pc A will involve the cats.

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Speaker 1: Did cat's poor? Peter, Peter, it's a cat's poor. It

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Speaker 1: was a live cat. No, no, no, it's did. But

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Speaker 1: it's still on belved that's still a touch to the cat. No,

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Speaker 1: you can remove it from again if you want to.

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Speaker 1: It's a recently did cat. And can you go the

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Speaker 1: other way with the cat's poor? Do you have to

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Speaker 1: go with the I think the problem with the cat's

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Speaker 1: paw is coming back out again? Law first? Oh god,

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Speaker 1: I think going in nice, going out again problematic? Is

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Speaker 1: it still warm? Yep? How recently did you kill the cat?

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Speaker 1: Ten minutes? Why did you kill it? You can use

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Speaker 1: the blood because he found it as a road it

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Speaker 1: was roadkill and he and he he tried to resusciate

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Speaker 1: and he couldn't.

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Speaker 2: And then I've got a spade and I tried to

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Speaker 2: put it out of its Missouri but and then it

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Speaker 2: didn't work.

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Speaker 1: I think that you have sort of taken us down

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Speaker 1: a bit of a sort of a rabbit like what

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Speaker 1: about a rabbits? Because because I like I want to

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Speaker 1: do I'll do my one and then you can do

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Speaker 1: your one. Jerry, yep, okay, and I'll go with you first. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So poker, Pineapple or Barbie Doll? Up the ass? Barbie Doll?

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Speaker 1: Do you in mind that that Bobby Doll's going to

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Speaker 1: leave its hid in there? You can't go foot first

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Speaker 1: with the Barbie Doll.

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Speaker 3: I'm just gonna I'm going to put Babby Doll at one.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I Gobby.

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Speaker 3: There's a sexual attraction to a Bobby Doll that I

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Speaker 3: can get behind get.

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Speaker 1: Myself in a way. It does turn it into a

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Speaker 1: sixth act rather than just a deer from a friend.

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Speaker 1: What happens if you try the pineapple like you get

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Speaker 1: put the pineapple up? You know which way? By the way,

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Speaker 1: there's no good way. Is it cut up? It's a

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Speaker 1: full with the at the top.

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Speaker 3: Now call me tight, but I don't beg myself to

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Speaker 3: get it up?

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Speaker 1: What really? What's wrong with you? The problem with you?

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00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:07,440
Speaker 1: You can use mate, But the problem with the problem

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Speaker 1: with the leaves is that they'll be in back. Why

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Speaker 1: they and then they go they get much wider. I'm

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Speaker 1: going other in first. I think you've got to go

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Speaker 1: the other in first. You can hold I think you

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00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:22,520
Speaker 1: hold the leaves and work it in and out. I

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Speaker 1: think you're allowed. Are we allowed to this? I think

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Speaker 1: I think you're allowed. I think you're allowed to hold

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Speaker 1: onto the I don't think you have to push the

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Speaker 1: leaves up there. I think you go on the other

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Speaker 1: way and you can hold onto the leaves. I think

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Speaker 1: you get half of the pineapple up and you've go

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Speaker 1: God's work. Yeah, I reckon, I reckon. Barbie has to

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Speaker 1: go and head first.

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Speaker 2: I agree with head first, but the shoulders are going

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Speaker 2: to be difficult, and then we shave the barbie.

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Speaker 1: Yep, right, breach. I'd go breach for Barbie. I think

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Speaker 1: you're allowed to go breach. Surely breach leads first first yea, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I see, like I'd be shoving it up there, breach.

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Speaker 1: But once you've still got to deal with the arms.

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Speaker 1: When when that time comes, it's like giving birth all

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Speaker 1: the arms, because where if you're going the other way

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Speaker 1: with the head first, you only have to deal with

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Speaker 1: the shoulders. The arms sort of tie the Barbie up

379
00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:06,440
Speaker 1: like Peter plummey Walker going over the falls.

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00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:08,800
Speaker 3: See I do the arms above the head.

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Speaker 1: Yes, oh okay, yeah, that's smart. If you've got you's

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00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:14,879
Speaker 1: done this before. If you've got swimming barby, But I

383
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:16,800
Speaker 1: noticed that everyone's showing away from the red hot Poker,

384
00:17:16,840 --> 00:17:20,879
Speaker 1: which is the narrowest. But also what are you doing though,

385
00:17:20,920 --> 00:17:24,119
Speaker 1: because that's the biggest house, so that that'll go in

386
00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:26,240
Speaker 1: the easiest, but it'll do more damage when it's in there,

387
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:26,880
Speaker 1: no doubt.

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00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:29,960
Speaker 3: Oh there's a disaster. In terms of the ends of

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00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:33,280
Speaker 3: the pineapple. It's the same thing with lots of fruit.

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00:17:33,359 --> 00:17:35,560
Speaker 3: So if you were to, I hate to bring up

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00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:38,520
Speaker 3: the banana incident from when I accidentally shoved up the

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Speaker 3: banana O your eys.

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00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:42,000
Speaker 1: And equally, could we could bring up that time and

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00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:43,040
Speaker 1: put that frozen banana?

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00:17:43,119 --> 00:17:47,200
Speaker 3: And what end are you shoving a banana? Mine?

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00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:49,480
Speaker 1: Was mine was a frozen like a frosted kind of

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00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:53,639
Speaker 1: sugary on a sta was it peeled? It was peeled?

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Speaker 3: That's feel quite nice.

399
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Speaker 1: And I went up, I've got the picture here. It

400
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Speaker 1: feel good.

401
00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:00,600
Speaker 3: After the Hot Poker show, Can.

402
00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:02,159
Speaker 2: You put the picture up on the on the on

403
00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:04,080
Speaker 2: the dock again just soa can have another look at that?

404
00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:06,480
Speaker 2: Just how pleased you to? I think I took the picture.

405
00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:08,360
Speaker 2: In fact, I did.

406
00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:09,440
Speaker 1: I took that photo.

407
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:11,840
Speaker 2: Can we put the did you never you've never given

408
00:18:11,920 --> 00:18:14,040
Speaker 2: me a photo credit for that, which is quite disappointing

409
00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:16,200
Speaker 2: when you have placed it up on social media. Next time,

410
00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:20,760
Speaker 2: I want photo credit photo creator d Wells please, JJ

411
00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:23,720
Speaker 2: d Wells. Is that what you call yourself? Well, those

412
00:18:23,760 --> 00:18:27,280
Speaker 2: are my initials jj D and then my surname as Wells.

413
00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:30,400
Speaker 3: You never winners that beforehand? Is that just ever since

414
00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:33,080
Speaker 3: JJ and he became at one point you're trying to

415
00:18:33,119 --> 00:18:37,399
Speaker 3: distance yourself saying that jjs A d well JJ d Wells,

416
00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:38,840
Speaker 3: Jeremy Drummond.

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00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:40,280
Speaker 1: Wells, Jeremy James Drummond.

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Speaker 3: Well, oh, so I was going to say the extra

419
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:43,800
Speaker 3: j's coming from somebody. How are you finding that image?

420
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Speaker 1: Man?

421
00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:46,720
Speaker 3: Any luck there? No, I'm not actually so many years ago,

422
00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:48,280
Speaker 3: isn't it annoying when you have to find a photo

423
00:18:48,720 --> 00:18:51,080
Speaker 3: and then we've got so many photos of our ship and.

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00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:54,880
Speaker 1: You can't and you can't search bana banana up someone's

425
00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:56,800
Speaker 1: chips and you search Mike Lane.

426
00:18:58,720 --> 00:18:59,840
Speaker 3: You can see people by their face.

427
00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:01,800
Speaker 1: We'll put it up.

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00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,560
Speaker 3: We'll put it up on our socials again tonight.

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00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:05,639
Speaker 1: Yeah. Anyway, sorry, I did railed you because when that

430
00:19:05,680 --> 00:19:07,280
Speaker 1: one it was a different It wasn't really like a

431
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:09,679
Speaker 1: banana and then it was like it was a special

432
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Speaker 1: banana treat.

433
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Speaker 3: So where did we land on the Barbie pineapple and

434
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:16,160
Speaker 3: red hot Poker? It was Barbie number one, the pineapple

435
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,920
Speaker 3: number two. I have to disagree with the pineapple, and

436
00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:20,760
Speaker 3: number two. I don't really think I'm gonna be able

437
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:24,480
Speaker 3: to get it. The red hot poker is gonna you

438
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:25,000
Speaker 3: don't want that.

439
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:28,480
Speaker 1: It's no way you don't want that. It's really hot. Yeah,

440
00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:30,400
Speaker 1: it's the last one.

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00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:34,200
Speaker 3: Okay, So we've decided Barbie's the best option. Up the

442
00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:35,400
Speaker 3: arse imagine.

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00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:38,400
Speaker 1: Minute, I'll just go to the content because gu Lane

444
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:40,439
Speaker 1: is when I ring Gulaine that comes up.

445
00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:46,720
Speaker 3: Can we record just a little bit here to say, hey, look,

446
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:49,880
Speaker 3: today's content own the podcast is a little bit lude

447
00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:51,840
Speaker 3: coming up.

448
00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:53,480
Speaker 1: And you can only see his face.

449
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:56,760
Speaker 3: Oh that is the photo just without the banana part.

450
00:19:56,920 --> 00:19:59,920
Speaker 1: That's the So it's just concerned on his face.

451
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,840
Speaker 3: But he is happy. God, he was happy, wasn't he.

452
00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:03,280
Speaker 3: There's so much pleasure in that photo.

453
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:06,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe we should put a message like whatever you're doing,

454
00:20:07,600 --> 00:20:11,400
Speaker 1: just be weary, whatever you do, and do not listen

455
00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:12,120
Speaker 1: to this podcast.

456
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:14,879
Speaker 3: I would also say it might turn some people on

457
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:16,359
Speaker 3: as well. I think it's a good thing to note that.

458
00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:18,080
Speaker 3: I don't know if you're about to get dating or

459
00:20:18,119 --> 00:20:19,680
Speaker 3: something like that. You don't want to be all coming,

460
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:21,840
Speaker 3: all hot and steamy. But I think the main key

461
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:23,679
Speaker 3: focus is, hey, if you've got kids in the car,

462
00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:25,440
Speaker 3: we're about to talk for twenty minutes about shoving it

463
00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:26,040
Speaker 3: up your ass.

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00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:29,120
Speaker 1: Yep, just be weary. I'm happy with that party. You guys,

465
00:20:29,119 --> 00:20:31,320
Speaker 1: happy with them. Never been happier. Yeah, I think that

466
00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:31,800
Speaker 1: was a good one.

467
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:33,520
Speaker 3: Well can you record that? But can you do a bit?

468
00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:35,040
Speaker 1: Yep?

469
00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:36,160
Speaker 3: Again.

470
00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:39,640
Speaker 1: Some of the content on this edition of the Matt

471
00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:43,600
Speaker 1: and Jerry Daily Bespoke Podcast could be considered lude by

472
00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:49,919
Speaker 1: some people view a discretion listen to listen to discretion listener,

473
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:52,000
Speaker 1: discretion is advised.

474
00:20:52,080 --> 00:20:55,400
Speaker 2: But don't stop it from don't stop that warning from

475
00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:57,200
Speaker 2: making you listen to it.

476
00:20:57,240 --> 00:21:02,399
Speaker 1: If you yeah, yeah, okay, And as you listen, and

477
00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:04,399
Speaker 1: as you listen to this, just maybe take a second

478
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:08,159
Speaker 1: to contemplate that this is the as voted by the

479
00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:11,280
Speaker 1: New Zealand Radio and TV Awards, the best podcast in

480
00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:13,359
Speaker 1: New Zealand. So that what you've just listened to, if

481
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:15,359
Speaker 1: people coming back this way, just you think about that,

482
00:21:15,520 --> 00:21:17,240
Speaker 1: and you actually maybe look at the mirror and ask,

483
00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:20,360
Speaker 1: what's wrong with you that this is the best podcast

484
00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:20,960
Speaker 1: in New Zealand.

485
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:23,359
Speaker 3: No careful what you're doing here is I wouldn't blame

486
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:26,639
Speaker 3: I just cand it's viectim blaming. Don't inviect him blame people.

487
00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:31,359
Speaker 1: People's fault that they're listening to this, right. I just

488
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:32,879
Speaker 1: think people need to take a long, hard look at

489
00:21:32,880 --> 00:21:34,960
Speaker 1: themselves and ask, how can this be the best podcast

490
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,960
Speaker 1: in New Zealand? At the radio Victim, I mean that

491
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:39,480
Speaker 1: was a major that was a major awards. It was

492
00:21:39,520 --> 00:21:42,720
Speaker 1: fifteen hundred people at it. You've got Jeremy Corbett hosting it.

493
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:45,880
Speaker 1: It's a huge gala event, and this is the best

494
00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:48,000
Speaker 1: freaking podcast. Is the best our country can come up with?

495
00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:52,040
Speaker 1: It's better than hosking Zim.

496
00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:54,800
Speaker 2: It's not that it's not the people that's listening's fault.

497
00:21:55,119 --> 00:21:57,640
Speaker 2: Better than I think you'd be very careful there.

498
00:21:57,760 --> 00:21:59,560
Speaker 1: I think it's I think it's our nation as a

499
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:01,560
Speaker 1: whole is to like have a look at itself and go,

500
00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:04,080
Speaker 1: is this the best we've got? What we've just done

501
00:22:04,119 --> 00:22:06,640
Speaker 1: for the last twenty three minutes, is that the best

502
00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:07,760
Speaker 1: that our nation can come up with?

503
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:10,199
Speaker 2: Is it yeah, I don't know if this one's going

504
00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:11,840
Speaker 2: to be going into the next years.

505
00:22:13,480 --> 00:22:15,000
Speaker 3: You know, it might be surprised.

506
00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:19,160
Speaker 1: Yeahs if it does. The entryway we've won something years

507
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:20,480
Speaker 1: in a row. We want to sort try and crenate it.

508
00:22:21,359 --> 00:22:24,359
Speaker 5: We also say just please, don't let this just encourage

509
00:22:24,359 --> 00:22:26,000
Speaker 5: you to put things up your ass if it's not

510
00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:26,920
Speaker 5: something you're into.

511
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:29,120
Speaker 2: Are we going back in time or is that coming

512
00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:29,479
Speaker 2: at the end.

513
00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:31,840
Speaker 3: I don't think we need it at the start, just

514
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:32,320
Speaker 3: at the end.

515
00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:35,720
Speaker 1: Okay, So I hope you've enjoyed knife, fork or Spoon,

516
00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:39,159
Speaker 1: and we'll be back tomorrow with another daily bespoke podcast.

517
00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:42,880
Speaker 2: You don't want to call it Barbie, hot poker or pineapple.

518
00:22:43,040 --> 00:22:45,159
Speaker 1: I think that I think that gives it away what

519
00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:48,720
Speaker 1: we're talking about, because if if someone says hot poker,

520
00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:53,240
Speaker 1: I know exactly and people, no one's gonna listen to that.

521
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:55,080
Speaker 2: I think it just sounds a little bit softer if

522
00:22:55,119 --> 00:22:58,760
Speaker 2: it's but if it's hot poker, pineapple or cats poor,

523
00:22:59,320 --> 00:23:00,880
Speaker 2: I just think it's a little bit, just a little

524
00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:03,080
Speaker 2: bit softer. A man, you're just so pushing this cat,

525
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:07,119
Speaker 2: cat's poor. You're just pushing this cat pa so hard.

526
00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:10,760
Speaker 1: Give it I go front paw over the back paw.

527
00:23:11,840 --> 00:23:14,640
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what, I wouldn't mind cats teal dry

528
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:18,159
Speaker 1: out up there, though I wouldn't mind cats down. Wouldn't

529
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:18,719
Speaker 1: mind wouldn't

530
00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:21,000
Speaker 3: We have to fucking in this Christ