Speaker 1: Live for the Export Beer Gaddin Studio and brought to you,
Speaker 1: as always by Export Ultra the beer for Here. This
Speaker 1: is the Agenda Podcast for Tuesday, the nineteenth of No
Speaker 1: Remember The.
Speaker 2: Agenda Podcast, the home of Sporting nonsense and clap Trap,
Speaker 2: brought to you by Export A vulture.
Speaker 3: In a very heavy Tuesday to j Lane.
Speaker 4: Oh, great to be here. Great to be here on
Speaker 4: a Tuesday.
Speaker 3: It feels like summer today, it does.
Speaker 4: I've come. I've got the dogs out. Yeah, you do
Speaker 4: the dog the dogs out. I got the shorts, I
Speaker 4: got the birkenstocks on.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: It had a vibe to it. This morning I caught
Speaker 4: the faerry to work. It was glassy, it was there
Speaker 4: was not a cloud in the sky. I almost felt
Speaker 4: like crashing a beer on the ferry. But they don't
Speaker 4: serve before ten. Uh, it's disappointing.
Speaker 1: But I mean, how why do they not serve before ten?
Speaker 1: How slosh could you possibly get on a half hour?
Speaker 4: I'm not sure. It's just a good look. And when
Speaker 4: I was a youngster on this is another store on
Speaker 4: the Devonport Firry when they used to have the Kia.
Speaker 4: If you've been to Auckland, the Kia was this kind
Speaker 4: of fairy that had two fronts and it just go
Speaker 4: backwards and forwards, so I wouldn't have to reverse or
Speaker 4: come out. And it was quite slow, and it had
Speaker 4: a bar at the top. And when I used to
Speaker 4: live over and Devin Purt in my twenties, mahyday at
Speaker 4: least to have a competition about how many beers you
Speaker 4: could drink between and the ferry. And it was only
Speaker 4: fifteen minutes. But you've got to get up to the
Speaker 4: bar straight away, order the beer while it's still boarding,
Speaker 4: and then you only you biffit so you could turn
Speaker 4: around and you have two big gulps, put it in
Speaker 4: the recycle bin, order two more, try and neck as
Speaker 4: much as that one, then back to your table. And
Speaker 4: I think.
Speaker 1: Four was we've got four and right four is about
Speaker 1: part Yeah. Yeah for all competitive junger. You want to
Speaker 1: you want to have one down before boarding's finished, yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: before it leaves the dock.
Speaker 4: You've got to be at least one down, and then
Speaker 4: you've got another fifteen minutes to climb through three. But
Speaker 4: you've got to do it without being spotted by the
Speaker 4: bar manager.
Speaker 3: That's right.
Speaker 1: So you're going to want a busy commute so that
Speaker 1: other people are hiding as you were up to.
Speaker 4: Correct and then then lining up. Usually it's a Friday
Speaker 4: afternoon is when things get a bit funky. And we
Speaker 4: also used to use the Kere as a speed dating
Speaker 4: scene because on a day night we would sit up
Speaker 4: in the bar and it would go from Dimport to
Speaker 4: Auckland and we're just try and meet people up in
Speaker 4: the bar rough stairs. Yeah and yeah what he goes
Speaker 4: up to tonight? We hit it and then if we
Speaker 4: didn't get any bites, we'd just stay on the fury
Speaker 4: and come back to Devenport and wait for new and
Speaker 4: wait for a new load. And me and my mate
Speaker 4: Ramma Ramma Lama Dingong, we used to sit out the
Speaker 4: top of that theory and go back to some forwards
Speaker 4: until someone was dumb enough to tell us where they're
Speaker 4: going and asking us if we wanted to come hell you,
Speaker 4: we'll go to Degree with you, or we'll go to
Speaker 4: Provadore or some other ship hole and.
Speaker 3: This is grotten.
Speaker 4: Likely Hawk and Rat went with us, which my other
Speaker 4: mates is I remember we did. Actually someone introduced us
Speaker 4: as that a girl. What is this is a fucking
Speaker 4: zoo We're like, okay, this is not going to go well.
Speaker 3: Just picture you guys because the naval bases over there.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, you never close your eyes.
Speaker 4: And we had may in the navy too old. You've
Speaker 4: last loan we needed was a piano up there on
Speaker 4: from the top of the kere to show.
Speaker 1: Oh, grot and ram on the Divenport Express.
Speaker 4: We never pulled, not fucking once.
Speaker 1: Because everyone is going somewhere.
Speaker 4: Ah fuck, it was us well useless.
Speaker 3: Where I kiss.
Speaker 1: I don't think that's ever works. Then Gas tried that
Speaker 1: at the Sail and Anchor and too didn't work in it. Hey,
Speaker 1: Becky Cricket, we're talking about summer. It feels like it's here.
Speaker 1: Everyone's going to be playing by C this summer, and
Speaker 1: we at the A C C have finally done something
Speaker 1: about it for you. We're bringing out our own classic
Speaker 1: range of BYC equipment.
Speaker 4: Here.
Speaker 3: We are finally here, the ACC B YC range.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we've partnered with Rebel Sport and Silver Fern Sports
Speaker 4: and we're bringing out We've got a whole range. So
Speaker 4: first of all, we've got the straight up plastic Kiwi
Speaker 4: cricket set, your yellow plastic, yellow plastic cricket set. And
Speaker 4: the thing with that is everyone must have one and
Speaker 4: for that we're got a bit of a charity angle
Speaker 4: on that and the fact that every set you buy,
Speaker 4: one gets donated to charity. So I mean, no one's
Speaker 4: making any money off this to trust me. See, you
Speaker 4: buy one of those sets and we gift one to
Speaker 4: charity and it gets distributed by the Tanya Dalton Foundation
Speaker 4: and another charity to schools and communities. So that's the
Speaker 4: first one. It's just the straight up set. However, we've
Speaker 4: introduced something I wouldn't say controversial, but I think it's
Speaker 4: going to be popular.
Speaker 1: It is going to tear families apart in the backyard
Speaker 1: this season. What it would say is six and out
Speaker 1: needs to be mandatory for all backyard crickets games around
Speaker 1: the country this summer. We've we've released the punisher.
Speaker 4: It's a it's a cricket. It's a backyard cricket bat,
Speaker 4: a plastic mold. It's hollow, but it is the size
Speaker 4: of a David Warner Cuoko bar T twenty bat.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Is I'd say, I don't know, fifteen to twenty centimeters thick,
Speaker 4: and it's it's a point. It is a weapon and
Speaker 4: when you just when you time it just in a block,
Speaker 4: it full lies. Yes. So if you roll out into
Speaker 4: the backyard with the punisher this summer, people will laugh.
Speaker 4: They'll laugh. They only laugh once.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they'll laugh until they cry.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and then you pump them into the subcanopy and
Speaker 4: then they won't be laughing.
Speaker 1: Everyone that bays one should get like a letter that
Speaker 1: they can hand out to their neighbors. Hey, just so
Speaker 1: you know, I've got the a SEC's punisher, So tape
Speaker 1: your windows up because I'm going for it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we'll get a video up with the punisher. It's one.
Speaker 4: It's it's almost a comedy batah, but it's almost almost.
Speaker 4: It is a comedy bat But go into your rebel
Speaker 4: sport and check it out. The whole backyard cricket range.
Speaker 4: So there's there's wooden sets, there's a little and the
Speaker 4: mini punisher. So you can get the little ones, but
Speaker 4: the big punisher is the one you want. Range of balls.
Speaker 4: We've got the swing ball pre taped for you. We've
Speaker 4: got the training ball. We've got the kind of semi
Speaker 4: hard ball that will kind of if you get on
Speaker 4: the front prawn and it hits you in the shep
Speaker 4: it's going to hurt. Yeah, I've got the soft plastic
Speaker 4: one that's probably ideal for just pinning young young nephews
Speaker 4: and nieces.
Speaker 3: There's the one with the actual sem on it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, there's a harder one for kind of an open
Speaker 4: wicket situation. And they're good and they've got instructions on
Speaker 4: all of them of what the balls do. And yes,
Speaker 4: exclusive to Rebel Sport. Ideal stocking stuffers.
Speaker 1: Yeah, three pack of balls with the swing ball and
Speaker 1: the soft ball.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so hit into Rebel Sport, have a go.
Speaker 1: And then yeah, like you said, for everyone that you buy,
Speaker 1: another one will be donated. Yeah, you have to have
Speaker 1: every New Zealander has to have a cricket a plastic
Speaker 1: backyard cricket set.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you do. And when they get totaled as well,
Speaker 4: so you've got to replace them. The text sport to
Speaker 4: three two three six. You'll get a to rent link
Speaker 4: to a link to all the kit and check it out,
Speaker 4: especially the the punisher is I'm pecking. It's going to
Speaker 4: sell out. I would get there quick with the punisher.
Speaker 4: That's going to be the hottest item you'll ever see.
Speaker 4: You roll, you roll into a music festival. If you're
Speaker 4: camping and you've got the punisher.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, it's the first.
Speaker 1: That's the only beat I would consider taking around to
Speaker 1: someone else's house showing up with their own backyard cricket
Speaker 1: bat as a power move when you've got the punisher.
Speaker 1: It would make so much sense. Everyone would be like, oh,
Speaker 1: I get it. Yeah, old uncle Lane's shut up with
Speaker 1: his own bat to Christmas, and you need to pull
Speaker 1: it out of a bag as well.
Speaker 4: It needs to be you need to turn it into
Speaker 4: a ceremony.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Anyway, so yeah, sport two three two three six to
Speaker 1: check that out, and yeah, just go into it now
Speaker 1: and then that's all You're Christmas shopping done.
Speaker 4: For the year. And that you've got the acc book.
Speaker 4: Look out for the Black Friday special coming up for
Speaker 4: that because it's going to be a ripper and I
Speaker 4: think that would probably do two or three people.
Speaker 1: After Yeah, after the Golden State Warriors cleaned us out
Speaker 1: of hats, we just received a new ship this morning.
Speaker 4: Just come in, so we've got hats and law as well.
Speaker 1: Yeah, easy, just quickly before we take a break. The
Speaker 1: World Rugby Award nominations have come out and we're going
Speaker 1: to go through this quickly because we have not been
Speaker 1: nominated for many We didn't get one in the World
Speaker 1: Rugby Men's Fifteens Player of the Year. Would you put
Speaker 1: in there though? Who would you have put forward? Or
Speaker 1: this is the thing, So this covers the World Cup
Speaker 1: last year?
Speaker 4: Does it? Yes? I presume so?
Speaker 3: Or would last year? Is one have mopped that up?
Speaker 4: I guess this is two twenty twenty four?
Speaker 3: Yeah, so yeah, only.
Speaker 4: This year actually, so yeah, you're right.
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 1: Maybe Ardie Savi here, but they've got Caitlin Doris, the
Speaker 1: Irish fella even it's a Peter Stiff to toy and
Speaker 1: Chislin Cobby, which makes me think that it covers the
Speaker 1: World Cup. World Cup. Yeah, those guys were outstanding.
Speaker 4: No Doon.
Speaker 1: He was nominated for the Sevens Player of the Year,
Speaker 1: which I think he's one hands down either.
Speaker 3: He was outstanding in the.
Speaker 1: Sevens campaign at the Olympics. Mikayla Blyd and Georgia Miller
Speaker 1: both normally noted for the sevens as well. We did
Speaker 1: get him in in the men's fifteens Breakthrough Player of
Speaker 1: the Year. Wallace citt Ah side Teddy Well. It must
Speaker 1: just be this year then, yeah, it must be just
Speaker 1: this year. But I just looked at his and I
Speaker 1: don't know who Jamie Osborne.
Speaker 4: Never heard of him, but I see Emanuel also he
Speaker 4: had a pretty outstanding year. Was that his first year
Speaker 4: of international rugby? Think it? I think it was? Yeah, okay,
Speaker 4: it was excellent. Side Teddy might be up against X
Speaker 4: I think we're both so may take that out.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and such a fine Berg and Gormezulu from the
Speaker 1: Republic of South Africa.
Speaker 4: I couldn't name you who that was it? One of
Speaker 4: the bombs squads.
Speaker 1: I thought Sasha Feinberg was an actor or some sort.
Speaker 1: I think in a Sasha Baron car. Yeah, I don't
Speaker 1: know anyway, So those are the awards I think. I
Speaker 1: think well of the tit would be up there. I mean,
Speaker 1: when those Welsh guys accosted us in Amsterdam, all they
Speaker 1: wanted to talk.
Speaker 3: About was what was t T is a good rugby player?
Speaker 1: If I am and lost the X yeah, always have
Speaker 1: edged some or a gripping game at eight mil.
Speaker 4: And I love how people commented as a commentators are
Speaker 4: saying a good, good game because it didn't blow out
Speaker 4: too much. Are they expecting a twenty nil or an.
Speaker 1: I mean it was three at half time, so you know,
Speaker 1: I feel like I don't think they left anything out there.
Speaker 4: So they say, all whites, this is our path to
Speaker 4: facall World Cup in America, Canada and Mexico. Is we've
Speaker 4: got Fiji next, yeah, yeah, or Tahiti or.
Speaker 1: So who do you think wins that? Tahiti or two.
Speaker 1: I don't know, Tahiti.
Speaker 4: I think yeah, the verbositi Tahiti will probably win that.
Speaker 4: I imagine it's I think a bit more Frenchies than
Speaker 4: Tahiti who they got Dave, Yeah, Dave goes hard to
Speaker 4: be fair, but you've got to say that is a
Speaker 4: pretty good path to the Fifth Cup for the because
Speaker 4: at the time it was easier in Asia than it
Speaker 4: was coming through Oceania in South America because they limped
Speaker 4: us into South America and they're like, I've playing Columbia
Speaker 4: or Mexico every time to qualify, and they went, we're
Speaker 4: back ourselves to beat because in Asia is the Middle
Speaker 4: East as well, so that you know, you've got the
Speaker 4: Bahrains and the Saudis and stuff. So the Australians are
Speaker 4: like and I think from the Asia group, I think
Speaker 4: the top four go through, so you've got to so
Speaker 4: you can come forth and still go through, whereas Oceana
Speaker 4: you've got to win and then you play the fifth
Speaker 4: place South American team, which is usually a weapon of
Speaker 4: a team because they're so good at football.
Speaker 1: Right, So what so if we win this whole thing,
Speaker 1: then do we still have to play South America Australia?
Speaker 4: This is? This is They've changed it. So we automatic
Speaker 4: qualification from Oceania. Hell yeah, and we will be at
Speaker 4: the FIFA World Cup again in America as well, Canada,
Speaker 4: Mexico and the stadiums they're playing at mean.
Speaker 1: College football stadiums, yeah yeah, and some.
Speaker 4: Mean cities as well. So target that if you had
Speaker 4: been to a FEEFA World Cup, it's I went to
Speaker 4: one in Germany, is mean. Yeah, you'll never experience anything
Speaker 4: like it.
Speaker 3: I am.
Speaker 1: So we don't have to play the Middle East and
Speaker 1: team Okay, good, none of man.
Speaker 3: I'm surprised.
Speaker 1: I've seen some football pitchers in the Middle East that
Speaker 1: would shock and appolla. They are like on rock beds
Speaker 1: with just two goals set up at each end. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've never seen anyone playing on them, but I was like, jeez,
Speaker 1: imagine the kids.
Speaker 4: That is that's through Oman Yeah yeah, yeah, that's just.
Speaker 1: Like it's like Central Otago, just on a bit of shift. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just imagine the old body dry waddy beds. They
Speaker 1: just set a couple of posts, go for it.
Speaker 3: That truly is the global game.
Speaker 1: A hat trick to New Zealand's greatest ever athletic Chris Woods.
Speaker 1: He scored three of the best last night as well.
Speaker 1: A go hard stadium, So oh what's advanced? And one
Speaker 1: step closer to the Rugby World Cup? I have the
Speaker 1: Football World Cup. I have come across a startling fact
Speaker 1: that will shock you to your core, and it regards
Speaker 1: cricket and music.
Speaker 3: And I will regale you with this.
Speaker 4: No, no, okay, maybe no, we're right back.
Speaker 1: The White Stripes album Elephant, Yes, I'm familiar with it.
Speaker 1: It came out in two thousand and three, is the
Speaker 1: one that had seven Nation Army on it.
Speaker 3: It's sold.
Speaker 1: One of the all time sports chants as well, and
Speaker 1: chants the affairs chance, Oh yeah, yes too, and one
Speaker 1: of the first songs that you learned on guitar.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you pick up a guitar. It came out in
Speaker 3: two thousand and three.
Speaker 1: It sold four million copies worldwide and the cover, fun fact,
Speaker 1: had a cricket bat on it. I did not know
Speaker 1: that until I heard about it this morning, so I
Speaker 1: went and had a look at it. Sure enough, there's
Speaker 1: Jack White sitting on a cricket bat on a thing
Speaker 1: holding a cricket bat. John Baker was a Kiwi bloke.
Speaker 1: He was the tour manager for the White Stripes and
Speaker 1: he'd been playing beach cricket during the summer holidays as
Speaker 1: everyone's about too with the acc bice with one of
Speaker 1: his cousins, and then he ended up taking the bat.
Speaker 1: It was a kooka burrough I think it was kooka
Speaker 1: borrough Fisher or something.
Speaker 3: This in two thousand and three, remember, he.
Speaker 1: Took the bat with him back to Detroit, but ended
Speaker 1: up with him in the studio with Jack White. Jack
Speaker 1: White found the bat and put it on the cover
Speaker 1: of the album to symbolize an elephant tusk. The way
Speaker 1: he's sitting, he's holding it and it looks like an
Speaker 1: elephant tusk.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: The cousin that John Baker was playing with was none
Speaker 1: other than Kane Williamson.
Speaker 4: Caine.
Speaker 1: Williamson's bat is on the cover of the White Stripe's
Speaker 1: most successful album, Elephant.
Speaker 4: That is the most bizarre kind of degrees of separation.
Speaker 1: It's like, when we first heard about it, we were like,
Speaker 1: that's not true that it wasn't on Kan Williamson's Bat
Speaker 1: wouldn't have been on there. First of all, two thousand and three,
Speaker 1: how old would Caane Williamson had been about ten twelve?
Speaker 4: Yeah, he was very young.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And so yeah, it turns out there's a Kiwi connection.
Speaker 1: The tour manager back in the day, John Baker, he
Speaker 1: had it. He just happened to leave it in the studio.
Speaker 1: It ends up on the cover of one of the
Speaker 1: most successful rock albums of all time, and it is
Speaker 1: Kane Williamson's bat.
Speaker 4: How's that for a bit of trivia. That's a great
Speaker 4: pub fact. Yes, it's a great pub fact to just
Speaker 4: blow you and then everyone will get on their phones.
Speaker 3: But no, it's not. Yeah, that's exactly what we did
Speaker 3: this morning.
Speaker 4: Something fucking kids do to me at home. I get
Speaker 4: fact check every time, and most of my facts are
Speaker 4: completely made up. Yeah, hey, Siri, I'm like, fuck Surry. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: but that one will check out. That one will check out,
Speaker 4: because that's exactly what we did this morning.
Speaker 3: We heard this. It may or may not pop up
Speaker 3: in a promotion we're running across.
Speaker 4: Summer that fact. So you got you got to hit start.
Speaker 1: You've got a hit start now if you've listened to
Speaker 1: this podcast. So we were checking through that and then
Speaker 1: we saw this fact. We look, it wasn't on. It
Speaker 1: was never Cain. When Cain Williamson's bat have been on
Speaker 1: a fucking album cover? Sure enough Elephant two thousand and three,
Speaker 1: four million copies. Kane Williamson's bat is the tusk and
Speaker 1: the elephant ridiculous. Speaking of Kan Williamson and that, for
Speaker 1: those of you young broadcasters out there, is known as
Speaker 1: a segway. He has been interviewed off the back of
Speaker 1: Tim Southey's announcement that he's going to retire, and Kane
Speaker 1: Williamson said, yeah, look, I'm probably closer to the end
Speaker 1: of my career than to the start.
Speaker 4: He was about four years ago.
Speaker 3: Yes, that's right, he is getting he is getting older.
Speaker 1: But when I just wanted to jump away ahead of
Speaker 1: ourselves here, when he does retire, where does he is
Speaker 1: he on the Mount rushmore of batsman?
Speaker 4: He is New Zealand's best batsman statistically he is, so
Speaker 4: he will he would be the first head carved. I
Speaker 4: know that everyone's got a bit of white on for
Speaker 4: Martin Crow and yes, yes, potentially if Martin Crow played
Speaker 4: as much to his cricket as can Williamson, I'm sure.
Speaker 4: But he is the first head you carve.
Speaker 1: When you carve the other So he's in there?
Speaker 3: Are you putting Martin?
Speaker 4: And Martin craw has to be in there? I think
Speaker 4: Ross Taylor.
Speaker 1: Ross Taylor has to be in there because when you
Speaker 1: look up the total amount of international runs, he's right
Speaker 1: at the top there. Yeah, it's goored more than anyone else.
Speaker 1: Then it gets a bit squirrely. I think does Stephen
Speaker 1: Fleming go in there in the fourth spot?
Speaker 4: I think you've got to look, there's going to be
Speaker 4: some people that are going to look back into the
Speaker 4: kind of fifties and sixties kind of and say that, look,
Speaker 4: these players over just as talented, just didn't have the opportunities,
Speaker 4: whereas this current generation plays so much. We're compared to them,
Speaker 4: not as much as England in Australian India pay a
Speaker 4: lot more. So they'll be like, I'm trying to think
Speaker 4: of some old school, some old school the people are going,
Speaker 4: you can't forget this guy and this guy. But in
Speaker 4: my head and in my experience and my heart goes,
Speaker 4: it goes Williamson, Taylor Crow and then got no, No,
Speaker 4: I mean, look, oh shit, are we doing all formats?
Speaker 4: I was just thinking tests. I was just thinking tests.
Speaker 3: If we just go tests, then yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, and then I'm probably I'm probably putting I'm
Speaker 4: probably putting Fleming in there. Yes, I mean his Cricket
Speaker 4: Bears was great, but I you know, three hundred. But
Speaker 4: if we go for entertainment all forms you go Gapital Bears, Yeah,
Speaker 4: a steal and Chris Key, Roger two. Yeah, you know
Speaker 4: what I mean. Like in terms of Roger too. Yeah,
Speaker 4: there's gonna be some naughties. It's probably a question you
Speaker 4: should you should pose to the b YC podcast. Yes,
Speaker 4: because I'd say Dylan Cleaver and full Forward would go
Speaker 4: balls deep in this, yes, and argue about it and
Speaker 4: get quite a lot of correspondence that doesn't involve Fox
Speaker 4: South Canterbury. Yes.
Speaker 1: Well, we've done the exact same thing. So last week,
Speaker 1: after Tim Southey said that he was retiring, and again
Speaker 1: for those few young broadcasters out there, this is another segue.
Speaker 3: We were talking about.
Speaker 1: The Rushmore of Bolus when we heard that he was retiring,
Speaker 1: and so we put that out on social media and
Speaker 1: there's been some great suggestions.
Speaker 3: We missed a lot of bowlers out there.
Speaker 4: Like, yeah, okay, go for it. Help me.
Speaker 1: Richard the Groin, I love the grown Robert Kennedy, brook Walker,
Speaker 1: Mark Heslam. What is Mark Heslin bowl?
Speaker 4: He spins a spin bowler, Murphy Sawer, he has.
Speaker 3: Got a lot, a lot, a lot of.
Speaker 4: The Rushmore was just for the what category are we
Speaker 4: looking at?
Speaker 3: Rushmore of New Zealand bowl?
Speaker 4: Okay, so there's a lot of irony flowing through here.
Speaker 1: Murphy saw Seth Runce. Someone here has come through Headley
Speaker 1: Chatfield for.
Speaker 4: Tory Bond I Chatfield. I love Chatfield, but he's not
Speaker 4: one of our greatest bowlers. He was a he was
Speaker 4: a great player, a great servant, and you'd have to
Speaker 4: say great partner and crime with Headley. But I don't
Speaker 4: have your beer on a Rushmore.
Speaker 1: Because if Headley wasn't as good as Headley was, would
Speaker 1: Chatfield have been perceived to be that good?
Speaker 3: You know what I mean? Yeah, Like if he's just
Speaker 3: out there by himself plugging away.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't know. I don't think because you think
Speaker 4: Headley and Chatfield and Bond. You can't leave Southdi's on them,
Speaker 4: Brush Moore, Headley's on there for Tories on there. I
Speaker 4: guess the next one, is it Bolt or is it Bond?
Speaker 4: I'd have to say Bolt because Bond didn't quite get
Speaker 4: a crack in the rest of his career.
Speaker 1: Well, and this is the other age old debate about
Speaker 1: the Mount Rushmore. Is it longevity or is it apex
Speaker 1: because ab you would probably say Bond, I say, at
Speaker 1: the height of his power, because he was tearing up
Speaker 1: that awesome Australian team when they were you know, the
Speaker 1: big swinging dicks of world cricket. He was ripping them
Speaker 1: to bits. But it didn't last. So would you rather
Speaker 1: have the wildest, you know, minute and a half of
Speaker 1: your life or would you rather go all right?
Speaker 4: Well, then we look at the fucking manor express see,
Speaker 4: because he's bowling quicker than Bond. Yeah, and when he's
Speaker 4: on fire doing hat tricks. Scoring a hat trick got
Speaker 4: some suggestions. More suggestions came through Michael Mason. I couldn't
Speaker 4: point Michael Mason out of a lineup. He's got a
Speaker 4: big great I think you recognize it. It looks like
Speaker 4: an Easter Island Stead Brent Arnell, Jesus. And then someone
Speaker 4: said the Mount Rushmore of Enzi Cricket party. It's Chris
Speaker 4: Pringle in brackets, Bear, Jesse Ryder, Shot, Ken Rutherford Wine,
Speaker 4: Dion Nash, South African chronic. Well you've left the latest
Speaker 4: one off. Yes, that's right, because I think you could
Speaker 4: probably replace Ken Rutherford Wine. I mean, look, you've got
Speaker 4: Jeff Howard gin as well, and he would be up there.
Speaker 4: He not really known for his gin.
Speaker 1: There's a lot in there, and there's there is the
Speaker 1: most recent addition to that potential Mount Rushmore as well.
Speaker 1: By the way, kids, this is a masterclass of Seaguays.
Speaker 1: Former Black Cats bowler Doug Bracewell has been handed they'll
Speaker 1: study this in RADIOSCA has been handed a one month
Speaker 1: band from cricket for having been found to have used cocaine.
Speaker 1: Bracewell tested positive for cocaine and its metabolite benzole after
Speaker 1: a supersmash domestic teach when you match between the Stags
Speaker 1: and the Firebirds in January, it was accepted he had
Speaker 1: used cocaine out of competition and for reasons unrelated to
Speaker 1: sports performance. They shit, according to a statement from the
Speaker 1: Sport Integrity Commission or sick.
Speaker 4: So he so you got a one month ban. You
Speaker 4: got that taken down from three months because he went
Speaker 4: to rehab or went to a counseling session, whatever, and
Speaker 4: he served it in April. Not a lot of cricket
Speaker 4: going on in April. Also, this is a lesson lady
Speaker 4: and gentlemen, because this is it's now November. This will
Speaker 4: happen in January. He was suspended in April and it's
Speaker 4: now come out and this is a lesson people and
Speaker 4: pay your bills, okay, because what's happened here is New
Speaker 4: Zealand Cricket have lapsed on their whitewash investigations retainer. And
Speaker 4: what a whitewash do to send a.
Speaker 3: Message, They release it.
Speaker 4: They release it because obviously whitewash had come along here
Speaker 4: and they had done extremely well to keep this quiet
Speaker 4: for up to seven months eight months, that's right, and
Speaker 4: no one knew about it, and no one was going
Speaker 4: to know about it until that automatic payment didn't come
Speaker 4: through on the fifteenth of October and whitewasher like, you
Speaker 4: can't do that shit.
Speaker 1: For anyone who's unfamiliar with white washed investigations, these are
Speaker 1: the guys who managed to sweep almost every major sporting
Speaker 1: scandal under the rug ye most notably known for their
Speaker 1: work around the Hawk's Bay, winning the Ronfailly Shield. Yes,
Speaker 1: and you made a good point before about Bracewell and
Speaker 1: the team he plays for Central Districts, which covers Hawk's Bay.
Speaker 4: M See now we're talking. Now we're doing conspiracies. Where
Speaker 4: was Dougie when Hawk's Bay? We're looking after the shield?
Speaker 3: That's right?
Speaker 4: Was he responsible for some of that reason?
Speaker 3: That's right?
Speaker 1: And if he was, do we need to go and
Speaker 1: test the samples again? So this is what happens. This
Speaker 1: is what I keep saying. This is a subscription service
Speaker 1: whitewashed investigations. It's not a one time payment and everything
Speaker 1: goes away because they still have the dirt on you.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Absolutely, And then and they have got the biggest
Speaker 4: arsenal takedowns ever. So once once you're in, you're in.
Speaker 4: You're stuck with them. That's the brilliant business model of whitewash. Yes,
Speaker 4: I've got so much on everybody. Yeah, that at any
Speaker 4: one time they can take down an entire team, an
Speaker 4: entire organization.
Speaker 3: That's right.
Speaker 1: And one payment's not sweet because they've still got all
Speaker 1: the digital copies of all of the evidence for everything
Speaker 1: you've ever done. So this is a subscription service, and
Speaker 1: the subscription gets heavier and heavier, and the consequence is
Speaker 1: a dire And this is this must have been the
Speaker 1: first missed payment.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because this one was relatively minor.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Absolutely, They've probably got so much more. Yeah, so
Speaker 4: so much more, and they've like this is a this
Speaker 4: is a shot across the bow to New Zealand Cricket
Speaker 4: to say start that ap.
Speaker 3: Back app or more will flow. Chris Kens gets it again.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we release his bank statements, not than anything went
Speaker 4: through the bank. It was mainly cash, okay allegedly yeah, allegedly.
Speaker 1: So I'm looking forward to seeing Daty Bracewell and the
Speaker 1: Big Match supersmash this this summer.
Speaker 4: There's been some good sledging that's going to go on there.
Speaker 4: Surely there'll be little baggies thrown onto the good link. Definitely,
Speaker 4: they just just the link here and to someone just
Speaker 4: drop an empty little baggie on.
Speaker 1: This sniffing around short of the line line. All right,
Speaker 1: let's take a quick break. When we come back.
Speaker 2: Yours please, yours please, brought you by Leader home of the.
Speaker 1: Whole host of voicemails to get through today. So we
Speaker 1: hit the phone lines. Now call it yours please.
Speaker 5: Yeah. I once shot myself on a bus from Glasgow
Speaker 5: out into the country. But the bus head the entire
Speaker 5: wedding party and I was seated next.
Speaker 6: To the groom.
Speaker 5: So yeah, I had to.
Speaker 4: I had to.
Speaker 5: I had to sit on my own feces for an
Speaker 5: hour and a half until we got there.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 4: It was fucking grum.
Speaker 5: A real low moment, that one.
Speaker 4: Oh that does sound low. Yeah that sounds low because
Speaker 4: I can imagine he where a stunk as well.
Speaker 3: Oh well they're shut himself on the bus. Yeah, I
Speaker 3: reckon he might have.
Speaker 4: Surely the groom's like you just oh myself.
Speaker 1: This is what I was saying about that woman who
Speaker 1: shot herself while she was running the trithle or whatever
Speaker 1: she was doing. If I shipped myself, there's the end
Speaker 1: of my day. I'm not carrying on. Like what did
Speaker 1: that guy though? Did he clean himself up and then
Speaker 1: go to the wedding. I presume they were going well.
Speaker 4: He sounds like it because obviously the glove the winning
Speaker 4: was in Glasgow in the after match was an hour
Speaker 4: and a half out. Yeah, because he had the whole
Speaker 4: wedding party on the bus. Yeah that's uncomfortable. Hour and
Speaker 4: a half.
Speaker 3: That's long time and then no respite once you get
Speaker 3: to wherever you go.
Speaker 4: I commission it would have dried up, but he would
Speaker 4: have had to proper clean up.
Speaker 1: And I think we kind of glossed over it, or
Speaker 1: we were in Munich, but one of the guys shipped themselves.
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, we did just gloss over the top of it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it fell He fell out a bit of an accident,
Speaker 4: but he was a bit sick. He did say it
Speaker 4: was struggling a little bit with his bows.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he was doing well to even be there.
Speaker 1: But we made jokes before that about she wouldn't want
Speaker 1: to shit yourself and a leader, who's it?
Speaker 3: Because how do you wash it?
Speaker 4: He too, Yeah, he found out a way. He took
Speaker 4: it to the laundromat.
Speaker 3: Fellow to you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what, in hindsight, that's why when I
Speaker 1: took my clothes to the laundromat that woman goes mum,
Speaker 1: mumy yeah, because she just said fell.
Speaker 3: The night before. It's like a fucking another one of
Speaker 3: these guys.
Speaker 1: Thank you very much for sharing that, and I hope
Speaker 1: that that's lifted a little bit of a weight off
Speaker 1: your chest for sharing that. This might be the first
Speaker 1: time anyone's found out about that.
Speaker 3: Another call here yours.
Speaker 5: Please boys game.
Speaker 3: Concussion and motivated.
Speaker 4: How good is that? How good is the sound effects
Speaker 4: of a V eight? Who someone they must have been
Speaker 4: an adelade or something. I think the V eight's are on.
Speaker 1: Potentially you're asking the wrong person, But it was an
Speaker 1: interesting point that he raised that one of the bucks
Speaker 1: had to be removed for a concussion. I don't know
Speaker 1: how you get a concussion in the car, but I
Speaker 1: do crashing.
Speaker 4: Into the wall. That's probably you probably suffer the worst
Speaker 4: concussion in a motor vehicle. You don't really want to
Speaker 4: be driving concuss because you get a bit I mean,
Speaker 4: you've bet a blue v a bit of perception issues.
Speaker 1: I had a friend who got a concussion at Nipple
Speaker 1: one day. She was trying to drive men who were
Speaker 1: going back home and she just took the wrong exit
Speaker 1: off the motor and Wellington ended up in fucking Upper
Speaker 1: Hut and she was like, I thought this was where
Speaker 1: we were supposed to go.
Speaker 4: So what get out of the car.
Speaker 1: Yeah, give me the kids so I can completely understand
Speaker 1: why you wouldn't want to drive can causs.
Speaker 3: But I appreciate the plane access.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think that's in terms of Yours Pleases, that's
Speaker 4: the best atmosphere at Yours Please. We've had. We've had a.
Speaker 1: Couple of dudes like in the toilets at the stadium
Speaker 1: while the keyis are playing things like that, But no,
Speaker 1: that was the best. That's just the kind of access
Speaker 1: you get here on the Agenda podcast. Another caller here,
Speaker 1: we go back to the phones, Yours Please.
Speaker 6: Hey, fellas a bit of.
Speaker 7: A conspiracy theory here, Manaya, I'm getting a lot of
Speaker 7: advertisements for the White Taki district. I know it's geolocation,
Speaker 7: but on your podcast it's just full of advertisements for
Speaker 7: the White Taki district.
Speaker 5: Are you?
Speaker 7: Is this some sort of thing about getting anti South
Speaker 7: Cannabury anyway, Fuck South Canabury.
Speaker 4: That'd be quite good from you, actually, if you put
Speaker 4: together your own geo targeted podcast campaign, just make everyone
Speaker 4: hate northo target. Yeah, and that's a good that's a
Speaker 4: you know, any potential advertisers out there, that's what we
Speaker 4: can do. Yeah, with this podcast here, we can hyper
Speaker 4: target regionally, we can geo target, so you know, get
Speaker 4: in touch.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, we can.
Speaker 1: We know so much about you listening that it's scary
Speaker 1: the amount of targeting we can do. We can target,
Speaker 1: you know, main household grocery shoppers, we can target, you know,
Speaker 1: thirty five year old single mothers. We can target, can
Speaker 1: we men who bat your left handed and bowl right handed?
Speaker 4: Go back to the single mother's one? How do you
Speaker 4: do that?
Speaker 3: After the show? But what air are you going to
Speaker 3: put together? Amen?
Speaker 1: Rammer a bit at the top of that, I'll bring
Speaker 1: Radon Hawk ratten Hork going to be out the top
Speaker 1: of the Old Express to Devonport on Friday afternoon. If
Speaker 1: any thirty five year old single mothers again, No, I
Speaker 1: would just like to remind that call a couple of points.
Speaker 1: First of all, if I can hate North Otago, so no,
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to advertise for them. And second of all,
Speaker 1: the targeted to you, not to us, So it's more
Speaker 1: of a reflection of you. And if you are in
Speaker 1: North Otago. Just bear in mind you can always leave.
Speaker 1: There are brighter days ahead.
Speaker 3: You could go.
Speaker 1: Literally anywhere and it'd have been improvement except for mid Canterbury.
Speaker 3: Another caller here yours please.
Speaker 6: Good lad's hoping you can point me in the direction
Speaker 6: of the reimbursement form on the ACC website. Was listening
Speaker 6: to the podcast on Thursday Friday and Glane was making
Speaker 6: a lot of sense about Mike Carson knocking Jake Paul
Speaker 6: Out followed him in on that one quite heavily, and
Speaker 6: it's not going to be a good week. I'm on
Speaker 6: the two minute noodles. Let's put it that way, being responsive,
Speaker 6: responsible expensively. But yeah, I just sort of fluck it
Speaker 6: through and you guys can improve that and put the
Speaker 6: money back in my account.
Speaker 4: Anyway, no problem, got great pipes there, guy. Look there
Speaker 4: there is a complaints form. It's not so much a
Speaker 4: refund form, but you can put your complaints together and
Speaker 4: send them to Private Bag ninety one nine eight Auckland.
Speaker 4: We'll deal with it how we please. We don't uph
Speaker 4: hold any of the complaints. But look, I mean I
Speaker 4: followed myself in on that one. I just wanted a
Speaker 4: one part. It was actually my it was my heart
Speaker 4: thinking with that one. But yaes, I hated Jake Paul
Speaker 4: so much.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what you want to see and then what
Speaker 1: you think will happen. Yeah, that's how I thought it.
Speaker 1: I put five dollars on the gone in sixty seconds, yeah,
Speaker 1: one which was paying twenty six bucks, and then I
Speaker 1: put the house on Jake Paul by decision.
Speaker 4: Ye as soon as I saw Tyson walk out with
Speaker 4: those chicken legs drop over.
Speaker 3: Oh god, a couple of squats.
Speaker 1: Yeah, mine, all right, another call here, you're suppose.
Speaker 6: Get I read bags.
Speaker 1: Just following on from Mitchell sent they're having a new nickname.
Speaker 1: I think Father.
Speaker 3: Christmas was it. Yeah.
Speaker 8: I was wondering if we could help withstra out and
Speaker 8: do so and work with poor Rifle. Change it from
Speaker 8: the pistol pathetic Australia pathetic.
Speaker 6: Maybe usual Lee Harvey Oswill when he's uptears in the box,
Speaker 6: the third umpire of the cricket.
Speaker 4: See yeah, so as he suggesting, we renamed poor Rifle
Speaker 4: Lee Harvey Oswald.
Speaker 3: He's umpire right, yeah poor right yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4: His nickname was pistole, but he's but obviously he was
Speaker 4: up and there he was he did us as solid
Speaker 4: in those test matches. He really was hating on the
Speaker 4: Indian team.
Speaker 3: But as he should have totally.
Speaker 5: So.
Speaker 1: He Texas Books repository Lee Harvey Oswald, Yeah, Lee Harvey
Speaker 1: Osword like it and that's great question without warning. But
Speaker 1: hopefully he's over here unboring some of our games.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that would be good. He's a good umpire in Yeah,
Speaker 4: big unit.
Speaker 3: All right, one last caller here.
Speaker 4: Yours Hi Julane.
Speaker 8: Big of the day against Park there was just two
Speaker 8: students in a cow suit being led round by another student.
Speaker 8: They were Mulu could get a few students shut them
Speaker 8: in a camel suit for the sixth Camel Oh yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4: I thought that was going somewhere else actually, because I
Speaker 4: was thinking about my days back back in White going
Speaker 4: to Whiteado games, and I was like, oh god, where's
Speaker 4: this going? With two men in a suit we lead around?
Speaker 4: I'm like, what did I do?
Speaker 3: Teenager? I sold a cover of pers to.
Speaker 4: A four pack of They got their money with. That's
Speaker 4: not a bad idea. It's we're going to fight. I
Speaker 4: mean I must have met the whole the cow suit.
Speaker 4: You probably find one of those. You go to first
Speaker 4: scene and find a two man cows would have a
Speaker 4: camel suit. It's true. It's dangerously uncomfortable being the back end.
Speaker 4: The front end is fine because you're standing up, you're
Speaker 4: getting all the all the love and yeah, in the
Speaker 4: back end you've got to be hunched over. You gotta
Speaker 4: be like all o Brown. You've got to straighten the back. Yeah,
Speaker 4: maybe we can ask what's the vow up to just
Speaker 4: get him to pop pop into it like a yeah,
Speaker 4: perfect straight back.
Speaker 1: He's punishing me on a sky TV at the moment,
Speaker 1: is what he's doing. Yeah, yeah, Okay, Well I'll hit
Speaker 1: Gus up and see if he's happy to be.
Speaker 3: Would he fit in the back end of a camel?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't know. Like, like, our quest for the
Speaker 4: camel continues, so even if it is a costume, it's
Speaker 4: a costume. I don't mind.
Speaker 1: I'd like to just apologize. I've just realized I've massively
Speaker 1: dropped the ball on this. I work with, I mean,
Speaker 1: I live with someone who's in the in the zoo,
Speaker 1: in the zoo industry here in New Zealand, and if
Speaker 1: anyone would know if there's a camel in New Zealand,
Speaker 1: she would And I've forgot to ask it.
Speaker 3: I haven't asked it.
Speaker 4: How do they travel? I know they travel well across
Speaker 4: the visits by caravan. You're right, what do you mean, like, like,
Speaker 4: how would you get one to Yeah? Could we just
Speaker 4: get a horse float and have one on the back.
Speaker 1: Have to be well again, this person part it has
Speaker 1: transported multiple giraffes around the place, so it can be done.
Speaker 1: They've got a horse float that can fit a giraffe
Speaker 1: in it. For the camel, camels are a lot bigger
Speaker 1: than horses.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but I guess getting a live camera into a
Speaker 4: stadium with lots of people might cause a few issues.
Speaker 4: They might get spoken camels. Camels are pretty good. I
Speaker 4: know that.
Speaker 3: Over and Dubai they've got because they do all the
Speaker 3: desert tours. You can go out there. I've done it.
Speaker 1: Sit on the back of camel with your missus and
Speaker 1: right around blah blah blah, so fucking uncomfortable in the back.
Speaker 1: An issue that they're having over there is that they'll
Speaker 1: just set up their little tent thing and have their
Speaker 1: cultural night there. You go as a tourist, but they're
Speaker 1: set up in the same spot as all the June
Speaker 1: bashes are, and so the problem they're having is dudes
Speaker 1: come flying over a june and you're park sixty camels there,
Speaker 1: so they are obliterating camels.
Speaker 4: Well, I'll say the camels. I saw the funniest shit
Speaker 4: in the Middle East when I lived there. You'd be
Speaker 4: driving along and there be a car in front of
Speaker 4: you with a trailer and and it is a camel
Speaker 4: laid down and it's head coming over the back looking
Speaker 4: at you out of the out of the trailer. Just
Speaker 4: a flat trailer, not like a big trailer. And I
Speaker 4: took a photo of it because I was like, this
Speaker 4: camel is just it's tied down with tidoun and it
Speaker 4: drops strops and it says, looking out the back of
Speaker 4: this flat looking lips are like, because it's on the
Speaker 4: back and the lips are flying over it, this place
Speaker 4: is weird. The funniest looking back. Yeah, and they and
Speaker 4: they want to obviously wander around the desert. Is they
Speaker 4: obviously some better ones look after them. But you'd be
Speaker 4: driving along and one would just be walking across the road.
Speaker 4: You're doing one hundred and eighty and a cam You
Speaker 4: don't want to hur to cut a camel at one
Speaker 4: hundred and eighty. God, you clean the legs out, no problem,
Speaker 4: but it's there. It's then the one ton upper body
Speaker 4: that wishes you.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: They are the funniest looking animals of all time.
Speaker 3: Camels.
Speaker 1: You just see them standing on the side of the
Speaker 1: road eating a cactus. No worries. Well, maybe here's a
Speaker 1: text from my missus right now, she's coming. She's going
Speaker 1: to drop my bloody lunch off. Okay, good shre So
Speaker 1: I will ask her if she knows of any camels.
Speaker 4: I think we need to think a bit more lattery
Speaker 4: laterally on this because even if we do find a camel,
Speaker 4: yeah I'm sure. I mean, we've done some stupid shit
Speaker 4: in some stadiums before, but I'm pretty sure they might
Speaker 4: veto the camel.
Speaker 1: So we run a Trojan camel situation where we somehow
Speaker 1: try and drive it in and the pretens do we say, hey,
Speaker 1: as a gesture of good will for Tim Southy's last
Speaker 1: ever game, we'd like you to allow us to bring
Speaker 1: the caravan back in, and inside the caravan we have
Speaker 1: a Bactrian camel.
Speaker 3: From the deserts of the Middle East.
Speaker 4: Rip the roof off the caravan, but the roof's already ripped,
Speaker 4: speaking which we are. We're commentating the chasing the fox
Speaker 4: from the caravan, and we've just had a notification both
Speaker 4: the warrant and the ridge over've expired. Okay, but I
Speaker 4: will ask.
Speaker 1: Him if he thanks are good for the camel in it?
Speaker 4: Otherwise, like I said, maybe it's a stuffed camel. We've
Speaker 4: got a taxi doomid camel anywhere?
Speaker 3: Oh, you just roll it in, Yeah, and.
Speaker 4: We can put that on casters. Otherwise we might be
Speaker 4: having to go for the Surely we can get some
Speaker 4: little blow up camels. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm not
Speaker 4: sure where from?
Speaker 3: No, lookshup.
Speaker 4: Can we go to someone like Philip Morris, a cigarette
Speaker 4: company and say, have you got any leftover camel merch?
Speaker 4: Get out there.
Speaker 3: That's a good point.
Speaker 4: Camel cigarette.
Speaker 1: There's a liquor store called camel. Anyway, We're off into
Speaker 1: the words now, ok yeah, reach out camel owners. If
Speaker 1: anyone out there knows of a camera, will please get
Speaker 1: in touch. This is our one mission for the summer.
Speaker 1: Enjoy the rest of your sunny Tuesday. Hopefully it is
Speaker 1: sunny wherever you are, and we will be back tomorrow
Speaker 1: for a Wednesday episode of the Gender Podcast.
Speaker 2: You've been listening to the ACC's a gender podcast brought
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