1 00:00:00,009 --> 00:00:01,940 Speaker 1: I have friends who are older than me who still 2 00:00:01,950 --> 00:00:03,420 Speaker 1: get the text at 2 a.m. Where are you, where 3 00:00:03,430 --> 00:00:05,079 Speaker 1: are you, where are you come on now? Now, now, now, now, 4 00:00:05,090 --> 00:00:08,279 Speaker 1: just because they're still living under my roof. So it's 5 00:00:08,289 --> 00:00:09,219 Speaker 1: my rules. 6 00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:18,090 Speaker 2: Hey, everyone and welcome to the Hot pot A podcast. 7 00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:20,430 Speaker 2: So we hop into different parts of spaces. People find 8 00:00:20,440 --> 00:00:23,649 Speaker 2: themselves in during life transitions. I'm Q, I'm Nick, 9 00:00:23,659 --> 00:00:27,280 Speaker 1: I'm Joey. And today we have a very special guest, Brandon. 10 00:00:27,340 --> 00:00:27,760 Speaker 1: Thank 11 00:00:27,770 --> 00:00:31,250 Speaker 2: you. So, I'm Brandon. I teach yoga day to day 12 00:00:31,260 --> 00:00:33,150 Speaker 2: and also curate a lot of like wellness um 13 00:00:33,250 --> 00:00:36,479 Speaker 2: festivals as well as you know, other wellness activities. Brendan. 14 00:00:36,490 --> 00:00:39,349 Speaker 2: From your intro, I knew you taught yoga like you have. 15 00:00:40,229 --> 00:00:41,180 Speaker 2: Is it the shirt, 16 00:00:41,450 --> 00:00:44,909 Speaker 1: the shirt, the vibes, like the cues, you know, can 17 00:00:44,918 --> 00:00:45,909 Speaker 1: you teach him to be a bit 18 00:00:47,098 --> 00:00:47,629 Speaker 2: more? 19 00:00:51,380 --> 00:00:54,020 Speaker 1: OK. Before we segue too much. What are we talking 20 00:00:54,029 --> 00:00:55,549 Speaker 1: about today? Today's topic 21 00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:58,509 Speaker 2: is about moving out, something that I can't relate to 22 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:01,490 Speaker 2: because I'm still not paying rent. Say I'm living under 23 00:01:01,500 --> 00:01:04,230 Speaker 2: my parents' roof. What about you guys? I'm staying with 24 00:01:04,239 --> 00:01:06,819 Speaker 2: my fiance in our own place now. But I actually 25 00:01:06,830 --> 00:01:09,330 Speaker 2: moved out of my parents' place like many, many years ago. 26 00:01:09,339 --> 00:01:13,429 Speaker 2: It's only 10 years already. How come after iord my 27 00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:16,589 Speaker 2: previous relationship, uh, we were going to settle down so 28 00:01:16,599 --> 00:01:18,690 Speaker 2: we also moved into our own place. 29 00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:21,660 Speaker 2: Didn't work out after it didn't work out. Then I 30 00:01:21,669 --> 00:01:22,610 Speaker 2: was renting, 31 00:01:22,879 --> 00:01:26,339 Speaker 2: er, like a small place, like staying by myself for 32 00:01:26,349 --> 00:01:27,970 Speaker 2: a while. Very, very short while. Then after that I 33 00:01:27,980 --> 00:01:30,750 Speaker 2: met my fiance. Joy. You said that you are married? Yes. 34 00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:32,768 Speaker 2: Why are you not moving out yet? 35 00:01:32,819 --> 00:01:35,839 Speaker 1: Well, it's a bit, uh, a bit of a conundrum. 36 00:01:35,849 --> 00:01:39,889 Speaker 1: My husband is American. We decided like to close the gap, 37 00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:43,139 Speaker 1: eventually we will move to the US. But I wanted 38 00:01:43,150 --> 00:01:46,449 Speaker 1: him here. I kind of want to, you know, finish 39 00:01:46,459 --> 00:01:49,059 Speaker 1: up in Singapore before I like uproot my life and go. 40 00:01:49,069 --> 00:01:50,790 Speaker 1: So he moved over and we are living with 41 00:01:50,952 --> 00:01:54,531 Speaker 1: dad and it makes more sense to live with my 42 00:01:54,541 --> 00:01:58,561 Speaker 1: dad one because he has the capacity to house us. And, yeah, 43 00:01:58,571 --> 00:02:01,171 Speaker 1: my dad is more than happy to house us. We 44 00:02:01,181 --> 00:02:05,241 Speaker 1: have the space. So we're very, very fortunate in that way. Yeah. Right. 45 00:02:05,251 --> 00:02:05,802 Speaker 1: So Brendan, 46 00:02:05,811 --> 00:02:09,162 Speaker 2: how long have you been living with your partner or 47 00:02:09,171 --> 00:02:12,811 Speaker 2: with my partner? Maybe about 22 plus years. Yeah. And then, 48 00:02:12,822 --> 00:02:14,882 Speaker 2: I mean, just before that it was with a friend. So, 49 00:02:14,891 --> 00:02:17,941 Speaker 2: what was the reason for you moving out? Was that 50 00:02:17,951 --> 00:02:18,572 Speaker 2: a trigger? 51 00:02:19,024 --> 00:02:21,904 Speaker 2: Not really a trigger, but yes, we do. Get triggered, 52 00:02:21,913 --> 00:02:25,054 Speaker 2: like sometimes staying with your parents. Right. And it's nothing personal. 53 00:02:25,063 --> 00:02:27,472 Speaker 2: It's just really like, like I'm your mom and I 54 00:02:27,483 --> 00:02:29,613 Speaker 2: care for you and that's why sometimes it drops off 55 00:02:29,623 --> 00:02:32,154 Speaker 2: the same, you know, a different way. But for me, 56 00:02:32,163 --> 00:02:35,264 Speaker 2: it's like you have that own space where you can 57 00:02:35,274 --> 00:02:37,583 Speaker 2: do what you want to do and you have that 58 00:02:37,593 --> 00:02:40,083 Speaker 2: space where you can really rest sometimes when you go 59 00:02:40,093 --> 00:02:41,663 Speaker 2: home and then, you know, my mom wants to talk 60 00:02:41,673 --> 00:02:44,293 Speaker 2: to me. Right? And then you feel like you feel 61 00:02:44,304 --> 00:02:46,723 Speaker 2: bad if you can't talk to her at the same time, 62 00:02:47,095 --> 00:02:49,266 Speaker 2: catch up on, you know, the day to day things 63 00:02:49,345 --> 00:02:51,144 Speaker 2: and you're always so tired because I want to rest. 64 00:02:51,156 --> 00:02:53,704 Speaker 2: So I know, I feel, I feel like staying out 65 00:02:53,716 --> 00:02:56,076 Speaker 2: for a while already. Just we make time, like, just 66 00:02:56,085 --> 00:02:58,315 Speaker 2: really going home for dinner and we catch up and 67 00:02:58,326 --> 00:03:00,296 Speaker 2: everybody has such a good time because you realize that 68 00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:03,766 Speaker 2: you don't have much time, let's really catch up and 69 00:03:03,776 --> 00:03:05,626 Speaker 2: have the best time. You can actually, I find that 70 00:03:05,636 --> 00:03:08,595 Speaker 2: after I moved out, like those years ago. Right. I 71 00:03:08,606 --> 00:03:11,516 Speaker 2: think since then I have not argued with my parents 72 00:03:11,526 --> 00:03:12,106 Speaker 2: a single time. 73 00:03:12,126 --> 00:03:15,085 Speaker 1: It's a stronger relationship. Right. I think it's important 74 00:03:15,167 --> 00:03:18,388 Speaker 1: because you've established boundaries with one another. 75 00:03:18,397 --> 00:03:20,748 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, but all along they were very, like, 76 00:03:20,757 --> 00:03:22,457 Speaker 2: you do your own thing, kind of thing. But like 77 00:03:22,468 --> 00:03:25,417 Speaker 2: even minor disagreements, like now you don't have them because 78 00:03:25,427 --> 00:03:32,677 Speaker 2: all those small, small points of contention like the toilet paper, right? Ok. 79 00:03:32,798 --> 00:03:39,878 Speaker 2: Are you, what do you mean it this way this way? No, 80 00:03:40,238 --> 00:03:43,098 Speaker 2: it's supposed to be that way. But always break. 81 00:03:50,589 --> 00:03:53,429 Speaker 2: I can go both ways. So I'm not commenting, 82 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:55,910 Speaker 1: talking about toilet paper. Ok. 83 00:03:58,250 --> 00:04:00,630 Speaker 2: Ok. No, so the thing is right, the toilet paper 84 00:04:00,639 --> 00:04:05,199 Speaker 2: cannot have like three or more squares. My mother cannot 85 00:04:05,949 --> 00:04:09,240 Speaker 2: too long, too long. you cannot roll it up, scroll 86 00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:15,259 Speaker 2: back to the floor, the floor, not touch the floor, 87 00:04:15,369 --> 00:04:20,040 Speaker 2: you wash your hand should not have. So things like 88 00:04:20,049 --> 00:04:20,320 Speaker 2: that 89 00:04:21,779 --> 00:04:24,470 Speaker 2: set you up and you just have friction with your 90 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:26,459 Speaker 2: parents over the you know, 91 00:04:26,470 --> 00:04:28,849 Speaker 1: I realized all the problems, right? They always say like 92 00:04:28,859 --> 00:04:29,959 Speaker 1: this time you got your own house, then you can 93 00:04:29,970 --> 00:04:32,130 Speaker 1: live the way you want. So I think that's why 94 00:04:32,140 --> 00:04:33,609 Speaker 1: people are like, OK, then I'm going to get my 95 00:04:33,619 --> 00:04:35,149 Speaker 1: own house and live the way I want. So we 96 00:04:35,160 --> 00:04:37,640 Speaker 1: don't need to fight and affect our relationship with all 97 00:04:37,649 --> 00:04:39,209 Speaker 1: these trivial things. 98 00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,000 Speaker 2: So actually on that note, right? Why do you all 99 00:04:42,010 --> 00:04:45,479 Speaker 2: think more and more young adults are looking to move out? 100 00:04:45,549 --> 00:04:47,420 Speaker 2: Is it because of these sort of things or the 101 00:04:47,428 --> 00:04:51,450 Speaker 2: toilet paper, toilet paper? I had it like I think 102 00:04:51,459 --> 00:04:55,119 Speaker 2: Asian parenting is different, you know, compared to now, like 103 00:04:55,130 --> 00:04:57,200 Speaker 2: when in the life of social media and everything like 104 00:04:57,209 --> 00:04:59,489 Speaker 2: you see and you live in Netflix, you live in 105 00:04:59,500 --> 00:05:02,469 Speaker 2: Korean dramas and everything and like a lot of life seems, 106 00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:05,420 Speaker 2: you know, so much more accessible that way. But Asian parenting, 107 00:05:05,428 --> 00:05:06,730 Speaker 2: I mean, it's a great thing because we are so 108 00:05:06,738 --> 00:05:09,540 Speaker 2: close with our parents. Nothing wrong with that, right? But 109 00:05:09,829 --> 00:05:13,790 Speaker 2: you feel like sometimes you're over like micromanaged, like every 110 00:05:13,869 --> 00:05:16,359 Speaker 2: time you have always seen, you know, small things they 111 00:05:16,369 --> 00:05:18,989 Speaker 2: have to say even like for girls mostly because I 112 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:20,570 Speaker 2: don't have that with my mom. But my sister has 113 00:05:20,579 --> 00:05:21,359 Speaker 2: that with my mom is like, 114 00:05:21,670 --> 00:05:23,320 Speaker 2: you know, like small things my mom would be like, 115 00:05:23,329 --> 00:05:24,940 Speaker 2: why are you wearing that? Oh my God, I was 116 00:05:25,100 --> 00:05:25,779 Speaker 2: going to say 117 00:05:26,609 --> 00:05:28,510 Speaker 1: like where you are wearing when you leave the house 118 00:05:28,519 --> 00:05:30,549 Speaker 2: also. And then sometimes I'm like the judge, I'm like, 119 00:05:30,559 --> 00:05:32,989 Speaker 2: actually this is fine mom. It's nice or like sometimes 120 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:35,808 Speaker 2: mom really, you know, Charlene, come on, I think at 121 00:05:35,820 --> 00:05:37,679 Speaker 2: this age. No, not so much. 122 00:05:37,690 --> 00:05:40,179 Speaker 1: You'd be surprised. I have friends who are older than 123 00:05:40,190 --> 00:05:41,950 Speaker 1: me who still get the text at 2 a.m. Where 124 00:05:41,959 --> 00:05:43,420 Speaker 1: are you, where you, where you come on now? 125 00:05:46,625 --> 00:05:48,725 Speaker 1: Now, now, now, now, now, now, now then 126 00:05:49,454 --> 00:05:51,274 Speaker 2: married, right? Or something or just 127 00:05:51,285 --> 00:05:54,105 Speaker 1: because you are still living under my roof. So it's 128 00:05:54,113 --> 00:05:56,433 Speaker 1: my rules, which is fair. I think 129 00:05:56,445 --> 00:05:59,415 Speaker 2: it's fair. My mom has that thing but I feel 130 00:05:59,424 --> 00:06:01,815 Speaker 2: it's my mom always tells me like it's not about 131 00:06:01,825 --> 00:06:03,695 Speaker 2: anything so that I can sleep with a peace of 132 00:06:03,704 --> 00:06:05,234 Speaker 2: mind because you're coming back to my home. So I 133 00:06:05,244 --> 00:06:06,845 Speaker 2: see it from her perspective. 134 00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:10,179 Speaker 2: Yet sometimes when you're in it, it becomes quite triggering 135 00:06:10,190 --> 00:06:12,260 Speaker 2: because sometimes you just forget to text them and you're 136 00:06:12,269 --> 00:06:15,279 Speaker 2: in a moment right now. This has brought back a 137 00:06:15,290 --> 00:06:18,630 Speaker 2: flashback to like when I was in NS you wish 138 00:06:18,678 --> 00:06:21,850 Speaker 2: my parents would rarely ask me like, where are you? 139 00:06:21,859 --> 00:06:25,450 Speaker 2: That kind of thing? Yeah, because I'm a guy. But 140 00:06:25,529 --> 00:06:27,890 Speaker 2: sometimes they will be like, because the days where I 141 00:06:27,899 --> 00:06:30,079 Speaker 2: book out and never come home, right? If I never 142 00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:31,170 Speaker 2: tell them like, where I am, 143 00:06:31,529 --> 00:06:34,390 Speaker 2: then sometimes they will ask like coming home soon, that 144 00:06:34,399 --> 00:06:36,450 Speaker 2: kind of thing. But they asked in a very nice way, 145 00:06:36,459 --> 00:06:39,700 Speaker 2: but like almost like they are a bit to us. Ok. 146 00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:44,739 Speaker 2: So I also feel a bit bad. I will then 147 00:06:44,750 --> 00:06:46,140 Speaker 2: from them the point onwards, then 148 00:06:46,420 --> 00:06:49,160 Speaker 2: I would tell them like, if I'm not coming home, like, 149 00:06:49,589 --> 00:06:52,279 Speaker 1: I think it's a bit of like house ethical. You know, 150 00:06:52,290 --> 00:06:54,750 Speaker 1: it's like, it's not that they want to control you. 151 00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:56,859 Speaker 1: I'm just trying to put myself in the shoes of 152 00:06:56,928 --> 00:07:00,109 Speaker 1: the parrot. Like because you are living with me, your 153 00:07:00,119 --> 00:07:03,589 Speaker 1: safety is technically my responsibility. I'm like the keeper of 154 00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:06,549 Speaker 1: the house, right? So until everyone at home is accounted for, 155 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:09,970 Speaker 1: I feel like I can't relax. It's just very simple, 156 00:07:09,980 --> 00:07:11,880 Speaker 1: just like, hey, I'll be late tonight, don't wake up 157 00:07:12,119 --> 00:07:13,350 Speaker 1: or like, 158 00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:16,709 Speaker 1: I'm not coming home tonight and then done aside 159 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:19,910 Speaker 2: from the, the points that we just mentioned, I feel 160 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:23,980 Speaker 2: like it's also having personal space and privacy and, 161 00:07:24,649 --> 00:07:28,970 Speaker 2: er, I think noise in my instance. Right. My dad 162 00:07:28,980 --> 00:07:32,600 Speaker 2: likes to play mahjong. So I think it's a bit 163 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:35,220 Speaker 2: difficult to navigate that, especially when, 164 00:07:35,959 --> 00:07:38,959 Speaker 2: you know, they pay for everything and then you cannot 165 00:07:38,970 --> 00:07:46,390 Speaker 2: possibly say that's a more practical reason. A lot of 166 00:07:46,399 --> 00:07:50,089 Speaker 2: people move out because, oh, ok, emotionally you want your 167 00:07:50,149 --> 00:07:53,790 Speaker 2: own but sometimes it's noisy and quality of sleep because 168 00:07:53,799 --> 00:07:56,589 Speaker 2: sometimes I think for you, your job is really nonstop. Yeah, 169 00:07:56,660 --> 00:07:59,880 Speaker 2: sometimes I do work from home and then that affects things. 170 00:07:59,890 --> 00:08:01,829 Speaker 2: So I actually at one point 171 00:08:01,899 --> 00:08:05,299 Speaker 2: I did consider wanting to move out because you stay 172 00:08:05,309 --> 00:08:08,839 Speaker 2: like super far away from Super West. Let's just say 173 00:08:08,850 --> 00:08:13,839 Speaker 2: that it takes one hour. Ok. That job will be overdone. 174 00:08:14,220 --> 00:08:17,890 Speaker 2: But yes, I mean, I did consider that but rent 175 00:08:17,899 --> 00:08:19,079 Speaker 2: is crazy. Now the 176 00:08:19,790 --> 00:08:20,820 Speaker 1: crisis is a 177 00:08:20,829 --> 00:08:23,239 Speaker 2: bit nuts. Also, if you are single, then you got 178 00:08:23,250 --> 00:08:24,859 Speaker 2: nobody to share with. I feel like if 179 00:08:24,869 --> 00:08:27,769 Speaker 1: your living situation is not 180 00:08:28,489 --> 00:08:31,480 Speaker 1: like affecting your quality of life, it's a bit pointless 181 00:08:31,489 --> 00:08:34,839 Speaker 1: to move out because it's like wasted money. You can 182 00:08:34,849 --> 00:08:37,099 Speaker 1: use the money to save the money for a house 183 00:08:37,109 --> 00:08:39,059 Speaker 1: or like rent in the future. You know what I mean? 184 00:08:39,159 --> 00:08:41,489 Speaker 1: But I think like in context to like why younger 185 00:08:41,500 --> 00:08:43,409 Speaker 1: people are thinking about moving out now more so than 186 00:08:43,419 --> 00:08:45,239 Speaker 1: when we were young. I feel like it has to 187 00:08:45,250 --> 00:08:47,419 Speaker 1: do with the rise of the importance of 188 00:08:47,510 --> 00:08:51,669 Speaker 1: mental health. Like they are prioritizing their own space, their boundaries. 189 00:08:51,750 --> 00:08:55,209 Speaker 1: Like we are learning that we can set the tone 190 00:08:55,219 --> 00:08:58,089 Speaker 1: for our relationship with our parents and that's why they 191 00:08:58,099 --> 00:08:59,929 Speaker 1: are like, ok, you know what I'm going to find 192 00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:03,349 Speaker 1: my own space and then still have the opportunity to 193 00:09:03,359 --> 00:09:06,358 Speaker 1: cultivate that relationship with my parents, even though 194 00:09:06,969 --> 00:09:09,950 Speaker 1: I'm away, Like, it doesn't look like a like I'm 195 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:12,340 Speaker 1: going to leave my house now. I'm ungrateful. It's more 196 00:09:12,349 --> 00:09:16,619 Speaker 1: like to protect myself and our relationship if you have 197 00:09:16,630 --> 00:09:18,640 Speaker 1: the ability to, I feel like a lot of young 198 00:09:18,650 --> 00:09:19,929 Speaker 1: people are doing that now. It's 199 00:09:19,940 --> 00:09:22,789 Speaker 2: like you engage with and maintain a relationship with your 200 00:09:22,799 --> 00:09:26,718 Speaker 2: parents and your family at a, at a pace and 201 00:09:26,729 --> 00:09:29,080 Speaker 2: on terms that you are comfortable with, it's 202 00:09:29,090 --> 00:09:33,479 Speaker 1: no longer like I cannot move. No, like I'm not 203 00:09:33,750 --> 00:09:36,000 Speaker 1: married. Yeah, I won't move. Like for us, I never 204 00:09:36,010 --> 00:09:38,979 Speaker 1: thought about moving out until marriage. Yeah. But it's a 205 00:09:38,989 --> 00:09:41,690 Speaker 1: very different time now. I feel like, and all the 206 00:09:41,700 --> 00:09:47,119 Speaker 1: living alone diaries on youtube and I feel like it's romanticizing, 207 00:09:47,130 --> 00:09:49,760 Speaker 1: being alone, which is great. I think it's very important 208 00:09:49,770 --> 00:09:54,359 Speaker 2: to find independence. Yeah. Western culture is very interesting also 209 00:09:54,369 --> 00:09:55,580 Speaker 2: because for us it's like 210 00:09:55,880 --> 00:09:58,289 Speaker 2: if you tell people that you are 24 25 and 211 00:09:58,299 --> 00:10:02,460 Speaker 2: you move it a big deal. Yeah. But then like that, 212 00:10:02,619 --> 00:10:04,819 Speaker 2: like you finish college they kick you out. Your parents 213 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:08,468 Speaker 2: don't like you are outside and you heard where, like 214 00:10:08,479 --> 00:10:10,409 Speaker 2: some of my friends from, from the States and stuff 215 00:10:10,419 --> 00:10:11,510 Speaker 2: like that, if they are still 216 00:10:11,599 --> 00:10:13,189 Speaker 2: with their parents or they move back in, right. They 217 00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:17,929 Speaker 2: must pay rent and it's a bit embarrassing. Right. In 218 00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:19,820 Speaker 2: their culture. And it's like if you want to bring 219 00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:22,619 Speaker 2: a date home then like, if you live with your 220 00:10:22,869 --> 00:10:26,000 Speaker 1: parents, but you know what? From my friends in America? 221 00:10:26,010 --> 00:10:27,119 Speaker 1: It's very common now 222 00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:27,859 Speaker 1: because 223 00:10:29,369 --> 00:10:31,929 Speaker 2: so it's changed. Ok, so Brendan, what do you enjoy 224 00:10:31,940 --> 00:10:35,530 Speaker 2: most about living independently? Because question does not apply to 225 00:10:35,539 --> 00:10:37,630 Speaker 2: all of them. Like living alone after thinking back, it's 226 00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:40,380 Speaker 2: really about like not letting my mom stay up and worry. 227 00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:44,309 Speaker 2: She's those kind who really want me to because I 228 00:10:44,390 --> 00:10:46,140 Speaker 2: think I think but 229 00:10:47,869 --> 00:10:50,330 Speaker 2: yeah, no, because my mom really and she will just 230 00:10:50,340 --> 00:10:51,859 Speaker 2: text me even if I'm out and she will wait. 231 00:10:51,869 --> 00:10:54,199 Speaker 2: She's not those. Where are you? Why you don't? Then 232 00:10:54,210 --> 00:10:56,830 Speaker 2: after I feel very bad because sometimes I really just 233 00:10:56,890 --> 00:10:58,650 Speaker 2: am so busy and I just forget to text her. 234 00:10:58,659 --> 00:10:58,989 Speaker 2: I think 235 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,510 Speaker 1: it speaks a lot that you feel bad and not annoyed. 236 00:11:02,739 --> 00:11:04,609 Speaker 2: But some days we got the annoyance to say 237 00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:09,929 Speaker 2: and you know, you have your days. It's been a 238 00:11:09,940 --> 00:11:12,218 Speaker 2: while now. So it's like, you know, you learn to 239 00:11:12,229 --> 00:11:15,130 Speaker 2: appreciate a lot of all these things. Yeah, that's how 240 00:11:15,140 --> 00:11:21,439 Speaker 2: I feel about you. No question I feel like my answer. 241 00:11:22,969 --> 00:11:26,460 Speaker 2: I like I like that. Like if I eat something 242 00:11:26,469 --> 00:11:28,200 Speaker 2: halfway I put in the fridge, nobody will take, 243 00:11:31,020 --> 00:11:34,000 Speaker 2: I'm quite territorial. Oh my God. Are you the kind 244 00:11:34,010 --> 00:11:37,809 Speaker 2: who get angry? No, but I I will say like, oh, 245 00:11:37,820 --> 00:11:40,320 Speaker 2: ok inside the fridge so I can eat, you know, 246 00:11:40,530 --> 00:11:40,919 Speaker 2: you must give 247 00:11:40,929 --> 00:11:42,049 Speaker 1: permission, you have 248 00:11:42,059 --> 00:11:46,280 Speaker 2: to label but I will ask so like no but 249 00:11:46,289 --> 00:11:48,718 Speaker 2: ok for both of us doesn't matter because I will 250 00:11:48,729 --> 00:11:52,179 Speaker 2: make sure that she's well. Yes, yes, there is an abundance. 251 00:11:52,190 --> 00:11:54,059 Speaker 2: But then like sometimes it's like if you are in 252 00:11:54,070 --> 00:11:57,739 Speaker 2: a big group setting, like 678 people in the household, 253 00:11:57,750 --> 00:11:58,460 Speaker 2: that kind, right? 254 00:11:58,909 --> 00:12:01,349 Speaker 2: Then sometimes like you buy something, then you are oh 255 00:12:01,359 --> 00:12:03,020 Speaker 2: I'm going to save this for like when I like 256 00:12:03,030 --> 00:12:05,030 Speaker 2: having a bad day, then you go to the fridge. 257 00:12:05,039 --> 00:12:07,799 Speaker 2: Then it's not, there can relate. Yeah. So that's why 258 00:12:07,809 --> 00:12:14,020 Speaker 2: like I feel like if I were to ever leave alone, 259 00:12:14,169 --> 00:12:18,080 Speaker 2: you will, you will actually when you eventually, yes. The 260 00:12:18,090 --> 00:12:19,059 Speaker 2: one thing I'm looking forward to 261 00:12:19,210 --> 00:12:22,919 Speaker 2: them, it's more limb than yours. No, I want to 262 00:12:22,929 --> 00:12:33,500 Speaker 2: decorate everybody that everybody came home but I don't know 263 00:12:33,510 --> 00:12:34,640 Speaker 2: when it is going to happen, 264 00:12:35,140 --> 00:12:38,140 Speaker 1: it will happen. Manifest, it manifested. OK? Do not touch 265 00:12:38,150 --> 00:12:39,140 Speaker 2: my crystals 266 00:12:40,039 --> 00:12:42,460 Speaker 1: manifest. No, I was going to say our place that 267 00:12:42,469 --> 00:12:45,640 Speaker 1: we live in now we got it recently like just 268 00:12:45,650 --> 00:12:47,520 Speaker 1: at the cusp of COVID. So we I did the 269 00:12:47,530 --> 00:12:49,880 Speaker 1: whole place. We ID it very nicely. Then he went 270 00:12:49,890 --> 00:12:52,650 Speaker 1: and buy the shop like the hook, right. Then the 271 00:12:52,679 --> 00:12:55,789 Speaker 1: hook got like cartoon one. Don't spoil 272 00:12:56,030 --> 00:12:57,739 Speaker 2: it. No. Is it also like the s hook? 273 00:12:58,119 --> 00:13:02,669 Speaker 1: No? No, like plastic. It's very strong. Right? But you 274 00:13:02,679 --> 00:13:03,340 Speaker 1: can buy the plane, 275 00:13:03,705 --> 00:13:04,474 Speaker 1: right? Oh, my 276 00:13:04,554 --> 00:13:06,505 Speaker 2: goodness. So what are you looking forward to when you 277 00:13:06,515 --> 00:13:07,424 Speaker 2: actually have? Ok, I 278 00:13:07,434 --> 00:13:10,844 Speaker 1: will say this. I don't like putting clothes on immediately 279 00:13:10,854 --> 00:13:12,494 Speaker 1: after I shower I 280 00:13:13,684 --> 00:13:14,474 Speaker 2: thing. Yes. 281 00:13:14,484 --> 00:13:16,814 Speaker 1: So when my dad is out of the country. Oh 282 00:13:16,825 --> 00:13:20,784 Speaker 1: Love and ok, disclaimer is illegal to walk around your 283 00:13:20,794 --> 00:13:26,914 Speaker 1: house and people see you, you cover them behind closed doors. 284 00:13:27,450 --> 00:13:32,189 Speaker 1: They don't know. But I don't like wearing no, no, 285 00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:35,500 Speaker 1: it's not. Don't sound like this for no context. No context. 286 00:13:35,630 --> 00:13:40,340 Speaker 1: I don't like wearing clothes after shower. I say no, 287 00:13:40,349 --> 00:13:43,260 Speaker 1: you know, I like to be in the air and 288 00:13:43,270 --> 00:13:47,109 Speaker 1: then dry my hair and long hair. Then your t-shirt 289 00:13:47,119 --> 00:13:48,369 Speaker 1: is wet. You know what I 290 00:13:48,380 --> 00:13:53,030 Speaker 2: mean? No, no, I get it but I cannot avoid 291 00:13:53,039 --> 00:13:54,559 Speaker 2: that or just 292 00:13:54,570 --> 00:13:55,959 Speaker 1: a big t-shirt with no pants. 293 00:13:56,609 --> 00:13:58,599 Speaker 1: Yeah. Very hard. My father comes home. I, one I 294 00:13:58,609 --> 00:14:00,059 Speaker 1: would like, 295 00:14:03,859 --> 00:14:06,210 Speaker 2: you know, what's the one thing for girls? Right? They 296 00:14:06,219 --> 00:14:08,189 Speaker 2: wear shirt right? Without bra. Then you must let it. 297 00:14:08,530 --> 00:14:09,049 Speaker 2: Oh my God, you 298 00:14:09,059 --> 00:14:09,679 Speaker 1: must do the 299 00:14:11,299 --> 00:14:17,919 Speaker 2: doesn't stick to your chest, right? So, yeah, so when 300 00:14:17,929 --> 00:14:20,000 Speaker 2: I go to the wash my hand, I like Hello. Pa. Yeah, 301 00:14:21,250 --> 00:14:23,059 Speaker 1: I'm like that. Right. And I'm like that because I 302 00:14:23,119 --> 00:14:23,340 Speaker 1: never wear 303 00:14:27,239 --> 00:14:31,010 Speaker 2: the struggle is the struggle of our struggle is 304 00:14:40,010 --> 00:14:43,679 Speaker 1: moving on. When do you think is the right time 305 00:14:43,690 --> 00:14:44,000 Speaker 1: to move 306 00:14:44,010 --> 00:14:45,880 Speaker 2: out? I feel that when you're ready and you have 307 00:14:45,890 --> 00:14:50,830 Speaker 2: to plan the practicalities, financial, financial, I mean, plan for 308 00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:53,349 Speaker 2: your future, don't like purposely because of this, then 309 00:14:53,849 --> 00:14:55,840 Speaker 2: you just don't save the money and you pay like 310 00:14:55,849 --> 00:14:58,260 Speaker 2: a lot of the rental now the market is crazy. 311 00:14:58,270 --> 00:15:01,390 Speaker 2: It is really not. And just for that sense of 312 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:04,090 Speaker 2: peace might dig other holes. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. 313 00:15:04,150 --> 00:15:08,679 Speaker 2: So like how stressed from living with but then you 314 00:15:08,690 --> 00:15:12,140 Speaker 2: get financial stress, correct? So you need to weigh your options. 315 00:15:12,150 --> 00:15:13,030 Speaker 2: That's literally 316 00:15:13,039 --> 00:15:15,770 Speaker 1: my friend's struggle. She doesn't know, like should I move 317 00:15:15,780 --> 00:15:18,520 Speaker 1: back with my parents and then literally fight every other 318 00:15:18,530 --> 00:15:20,020 Speaker 1: day or 319 00:15:20,150 --> 00:15:23,330 Speaker 1: find a place, but I can't really afford it. That's 320 00:15:23,340 --> 00:15:25,549 Speaker 1: a really difficult struggle that I feel like a lot 321 00:15:25,559 --> 00:15:26,030 Speaker 1: of people 322 00:15:26,039 --> 00:15:28,330 Speaker 2: have. I think a lot of people are choosing mental 323 00:15:28,340 --> 00:15:32,429 Speaker 2: health over and I feel that if it's really that 324 00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:34,789 Speaker 2: bad and I can't be there in that story, right? 325 00:15:34,799 --> 00:15:37,150 Speaker 2: But some people really have it very bad and they 326 00:15:37,159 --> 00:15:39,640 Speaker 2: have it so bad that, you know, sometimes family feud 327 00:15:39,650 --> 00:15:42,979 Speaker 2: comes and it's really dramatic. I've heard of big ones before. 328 00:15:43,369 --> 00:15:46,359 Speaker 2: So like in this case, then I would say like, 329 00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:50,250 Speaker 2: maybe you can find very like, affordable rent by sometimes 330 00:15:50,260 --> 00:15:53,320 Speaker 2: asking around as well, friends and all these, like, can 331 00:15:53,330 --> 00:15:55,570 Speaker 2: I do this for a while then until I find that, 332 00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:59,520 Speaker 2: or find a job? And so, even if it's temporary, ok. Yeah. Yeah. 333 00:15:59,530 --> 00:16:01,890 Speaker 2: I mean, I think the most practical one would be 334 00:16:01,900 --> 00:16:06,590 Speaker 2: once you hit a certain income level, you, you share 335 00:16:06,599 --> 00:16:10,020 Speaker 2: your friends, then you, yeah, like a few people to 336 00:16:10,030 --> 00:16:10,489 Speaker 2: a house. 337 00:16:11,140 --> 00:16:12,979 Speaker 2: The bright side, I mean, you must make sure that 338 00:16:12,989 --> 00:16:15,669 Speaker 2: there are people that you can live with. But then 339 00:16:15,679 --> 00:16:18,559 Speaker 2: the bright side is that, you know, it's also fun, right? 340 00:16:18,570 --> 00:16:20,690 Speaker 2: In that sense to be living with your friends and 341 00:16:20,700 --> 00:16:22,640 Speaker 2: things like that, you choose the right people, you must 342 00:16:22,679 --> 00:16:24,919 Speaker 2: choose the right people. This kind can end our friendship. 343 00:16:25,369 --> 00:16:27,950 Speaker 1: Yeah. That's why I asked. Are you still friends with 344 00:16:27,960 --> 00:16:29,260 Speaker 1: your best friend? Oh, yeah, we 345 00:16:29,270 --> 00:16:32,900 Speaker 2: are actually like, still really, really like best friends. If 346 00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:35,429 Speaker 2: she's watching this, she'll know because I think you're very 347 00:16:35,440 --> 00:16:38,729 Speaker 2: easy going. You very easy to live with. But, you know, 348 00:16:38,820 --> 00:16:41,489 Speaker 2: because like, let's say I'm very easy going. Right? And 349 00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:43,900 Speaker 2: let's say you're not so easy going. I can like, 350 00:16:43,909 --> 00:16:45,979 Speaker 2: let's say something which doesn't mean anything to me might 351 00:16:45,989 --> 00:16:48,599 Speaker 2: trigger you. Like he's not caring about this there. Why 352 00:16:48,609 --> 00:16:51,030 Speaker 2: he doesn't care. So it might trigger some people even 353 00:16:51,039 --> 00:16:53,590 Speaker 2: though I don't mean it. So I was trying to help, 354 00:16:53,599 --> 00:16:55,630 Speaker 2: you know, some days she cooks for me still. I 355 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,919 Speaker 2: tell you, I'm amazing. And in a lot of ways 356 00:16:58,929 --> 00:17:00,630 Speaker 2: it's like, kind of looking out for each other and 357 00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:02,989 Speaker 2: just really having a good friendship. But then again, I've 358 00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:04,780 Speaker 2: also heard a lot of horror stories. 359 00:17:04,790 --> 00:17:05,790 Speaker 1: So that's why 360 00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:09,920 Speaker 2: with friends, with friends also, we are very close friends. 361 00:17:09,930 --> 00:17:10,239 Speaker 2: But you just, 362 00:17:10,699 --> 00:17:13,459 Speaker 1: you think you know them, then you live with them 363 00:17:13,469 --> 00:17:14,208 Speaker 1: and you are like, it's like 364 00:17:14,219 --> 00:17:16,359 Speaker 2: traveling, like sometimes you travel and then you see the 365 00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:19,650 Speaker 2: habits and you're like, what's going on because all these 366 00:17:19,660 --> 00:17:23,300 Speaker 2: things can build up, like paying off the groceries. Small thing, 367 00:17:23,310 --> 00:17:25,280 Speaker 2: two people living together as friends, you need to talk 368 00:17:25,290 --> 00:17:28,379 Speaker 2: about everything. It's just like a proper relationship. What about age? 369 00:17:28,390 --> 00:17:30,300 Speaker 2: You think in terms of right time to move out? 370 00:17:30,310 --> 00:17:34,089 Speaker 2: Is there like in Singapore's context with our standard 371 00:17:34,579 --> 00:17:37,869 Speaker 2: education system and things like that now is a good 372 00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:40,560 Speaker 2: time for me to move out. Is 373 00:17:40,569 --> 00:17:41,750 Speaker 1: that something you're considering? 374 00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:44,339 Speaker 2: As in? I did think about it for the last, 375 00:17:44,349 --> 00:17:48,239 Speaker 2: I mean, last year due to family reasons, but I 376 00:17:48,250 --> 00:17:52,479 Speaker 2: think we've resolved the family issues. So it's not as 377 00:17:52,489 --> 00:17:55,280 Speaker 2: urgent anymore, but I think it's also just having my 378 00:17:55,290 --> 00:17:58,089 Speaker 2: own space and I do think that in some 379 00:17:58,155 --> 00:18:01,055 Speaker 2: ways I am quite sheltered because like I said, my 380 00:18:01,064 --> 00:18:03,554 Speaker 2: mom cares about the toilet paper. So there are other 381 00:18:03,564 --> 00:18:06,175 Speaker 2: things that she cares about, like when to do the 382 00:18:06,185 --> 00:18:08,925 Speaker 2: laundry when you need to think about. Right. Yeah. Yeah. 383 00:18:08,935 --> 00:18:12,895 Speaker 2: And she does, she likes things done her way. Yes. Correct. So, 384 00:18:12,905 --> 00:18:13,175 Speaker 2: it's just 385 00:18:13,185 --> 00:18:14,063 Speaker 1: done for you 386 00:18:14,094 --> 00:18:16,415 Speaker 2: in some sense. Yeah. So, most of the chores it's 387 00:18:16,425 --> 00:18:18,614 Speaker 2: kind of covered. I mean, I had a conversation with 388 00:18:18,625 --> 00:18:19,925 Speaker 2: my colleagues before and then they are like, ha, you 389 00:18:19,935 --> 00:18:21,155 Speaker 2: never do laundry. 390 00:18:22,989 --> 00:18:25,909 Speaker 2: Yeah. But, oh, my goodness. No, no, no. But, but 391 00:18:25,920 --> 00:18:29,229 Speaker 2: it's not because I don't want to. It's my mom. She, she, 392 00:18:30,670 --> 00:18:30,900 Speaker 2: her 393 00:18:30,910 --> 00:18:31,969 Speaker 1: routine too. right? 394 00:18:32,030 --> 00:18:34,400 Speaker 2: But I don't blame her. But I think because of that, 395 00:18:34,410 --> 00:18:37,030 Speaker 2: I just realized like, oh, I'm not as adult as 396 00:18:37,040 --> 00:18:38,889 Speaker 2: other people. You know, on the, 397 00:18:40,525 --> 00:18:42,785 Speaker 2: it made me realize that after moving out then I 398 00:18:42,795 --> 00:18:46,194 Speaker 2: really fully utilize all my clothes the last time before 399 00:18:46,204 --> 00:18:48,814 Speaker 2: you even get through like two or three shirts. Right. 400 00:18:48,944 --> 00:18:51,474 Speaker 2: Then you come back next time. But then after you 401 00:18:51,484 --> 00:18:53,295 Speaker 2: move out, you really will like go through 402 00:18:53,665 --> 00:18:56,805 Speaker 1: shop differently too. I only buy clothes that don't need 403 00:18:56,814 --> 00:18:57,354 Speaker 1: to iron. 404 00:18:58,045 --> 00:18:58,935 Speaker 2: I also do that. 405 00:18:59,699 --> 00:19:02,909 Speaker 2: Yeah. What are some disadvantages of moving out? Financial stress 406 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:07,479 Speaker 2: or mortgage, mortgage or rent? Whichever now one bedroom about 407 00:19:07,489 --> 00:19:11,550 Speaker 2: one k, one bedroom house you take the room only. 408 00:19:12,130 --> 00:19:13,479 Speaker 2: I think more no more. I 409 00:19:13,489 --> 00:19:16,489 Speaker 1: saw on Facebook. It's like 11518 here. 410 00:19:16,500 --> 00:19:19,770 Speaker 2: But from that it just, it just mainly financial. I 411 00:19:19,780 --> 00:19:22,069 Speaker 2: think your quality of life improves in terms of having 412 00:19:22,079 --> 00:19:23,169 Speaker 2: your own space. But then 413 00:19:23,520 --> 00:19:27,310 Speaker 2: you might need to compromise in on other aspects like, oh, OK. 414 00:19:27,319 --> 00:19:29,949 Speaker 2: Should I go and eat out this, this week or 415 00:19:29,959 --> 00:19:31,810 Speaker 2: should I go on this holiday? That kind of thing. 416 00:19:32,489 --> 00:19:35,339 Speaker 2: Commercial break time. The question for us. 417 00:19:36,750 --> 00:19:39,750 Speaker 2: Let's get our guests to answer one question. What is 418 00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:42,938 Speaker 2: something popular that you refuse to get into? Honesty? Tik Tok? 419 00:19:42,949 --> 00:19:46,680 Speaker 2: Because yeah, now like Instagram tiktok then for me it's like, 420 00:19:46,689 --> 00:19:49,160 Speaker 2: I don't know, there's too many things that I just, 421 00:19:49,170 --> 00:19:51,800 Speaker 2: just refuse to get into it. I don't know. Ok, 422 00:19:51,810 --> 00:19:52,579 Speaker 2: we respect 423 00:19:52,589 --> 00:19:57,089 Speaker 1: that. We may not understand but we respect what is 424 00:19:57,099 --> 00:20:00,300 Speaker 1: your best and worst trait? Oh, I think my best 425 00:20:00,310 --> 00:20:02,060 Speaker 1: and worst trait is the same thing 426 00:20:02,439 --> 00:20:06,619 Speaker 1: is that I'm very empathetic and it ends up being 427 00:20:06,630 --> 00:20:07,688 Speaker 1: my downfall. 428 00:20:07,699 --> 00:20:08,849 Speaker 2: You good and not good. 429 00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:14,060 Speaker 1: I know. Right. I honestly feel like it's a blessing 430 00:20:14,069 --> 00:20:17,079 Speaker 1: and a curse to be like overly empathetic because you 431 00:20:17,089 --> 00:20:19,400 Speaker 1: tend to feel things that you shouldn't feel. You know 432 00:20:19,410 --> 00:20:19,849 Speaker 1: what I mean? 433 00:20:20,510 --> 00:20:22,149 Speaker 2: Who in the room would you like to get to 434 00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:24,129 Speaker 2: know better? I think Brendan 435 00:20:24,709 --> 00:20:28,780 Speaker 2: Brandon got a good vibe. It's ok. Not that you 436 00:20:28,790 --> 00:20:31,099 Speaker 2: all don't have a good vibe but you want to 437 00:20:31,109 --> 00:20:33,750 Speaker 2: get to know you. It's a very, very big contrast 438 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:36,839 Speaker 2: to I think my own personality. So I think very interesting. 439 00:20:37,410 --> 00:20:40,698 Speaker 2: I know too long already. Then Joey keeps insulting me. 440 00:20:41,239 --> 00:20:43,560 Speaker 2: What is an of others that you can't stand? 441 00:20:44,474 --> 00:20:47,574 Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. OK. I dated someone that said that 442 00:20:47,584 --> 00:20:55,334 Speaker 2: will message. Ok. So what do we explain in English. 443 00:20:55,584 --> 00:20:58,833 Speaker 2: It's from man, that one. No, if 444 00:20:58,844 --> 00:21:01,834 Speaker 1: you do it, then just don't take Q. Ok. It's 445 00:21:01,864 --> 00:21:05,853 Speaker 2: ok. It was truly an I, and I looked past 446 00:21:05,864 --> 00:21:08,974 Speaker 2: it and it ended, I should have seen the red flags. 447 00:21:08,984 --> 00:21:09,364 Speaker 2: I cannot, 448 00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:21,180 Speaker 2: you got an example. It's not like that though. Ok. 449 00:21:21,189 --> 00:21:24,339 Speaker 2: So let's hop back to the episode. Cringe 450 00:21:25,430 --> 00:21:28,420 Speaker 2: actually on the house housework front because for me, I 451 00:21:28,430 --> 00:21:32,169 Speaker 2: went from, with my parents living with my ex living 452 00:21:32,180 --> 00:21:36,958 Speaker 2: by myself, er, fiance's parents and then now two of us, right, 453 00:21:37,130 --> 00:21:39,649 Speaker 2: going from that, like, have to do housework to, don't 454 00:21:39,660 --> 00:21:43,540 Speaker 2: have to do housework because my fiance's parents, like they, 455 00:21:43,550 --> 00:21:46,849 Speaker 2: they have a helper. Wow, that was like I took 456 00:21:46,859 --> 00:21:50,140 Speaker 2: that for granted man growing up like, yeah, the clothes 457 00:21:50,150 --> 00:21:52,819 Speaker 2: will just appear ironing done. 458 00:21:53,069 --> 00:21:56,979 Speaker 2: Then like 12 o'clock you go downstairs for lunch sometimes 459 00:21:56,989 --> 00:22:00,129 Speaker 2: like as an adult. Now, working adult now you were like, oh, 460 00:22:00,140 --> 00:22:03,040 Speaker 2: if I don't cook or order something, got nothing to eat. 461 00:22:03,880 --> 00:22:05,670 Speaker 2: So you need to like, yeah, and if you don't 462 00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:06,319 Speaker 2: buy groceries 463 00:22:07,790 --> 00:22:08,099 Speaker 1: or are 464 00:22:08,109 --> 00:22:11,900 Speaker 2: so expensive now, so that, that is one thing that 465 00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:12,729 Speaker 2: is a, 466 00:22:13,125 --> 00:22:15,015 Speaker 2: I won't say it's a, but you need to deal 467 00:22:15,025 --> 00:22:18,055 Speaker 2: with that. Yeah. Ok. So since you talk about the 468 00:22:18,064 --> 00:22:20,805 Speaker 2: financial aspect, right? How do you afford it? Do you 469 00:22:20,814 --> 00:22:23,494 Speaker 2: guys have any saving tips or how do you like 470 00:22:24,805 --> 00:22:25,724 Speaker 2: or not? You actually 471 00:22:25,734 --> 00:22:28,295 Speaker 1: save like six months worth of rent some people say 472 00:22:28,305 --> 00:22:28,774 Speaker 1: that's what you 473 00:22:28,785 --> 00:22:32,944 Speaker 2: need. If you go and Google, there are some financial 474 00:22:32,954 --> 00:22:36,014 Speaker 2: advisors and gurus and all those websites out there that 475 00:22:36,025 --> 00:22:38,573 Speaker 2: will tell you you shouldn't spend more than a certain 476 00:22:38,584 --> 00:22:41,274 Speaker 2: percentage of your income on mortgage or rent 477 00:22:41,579 --> 00:22:44,380 Speaker 2: and you should have how much like saved up six 478 00:22:44,390 --> 00:22:47,819 Speaker 2: months worth of rent. Um Like in case you lose 479 00:22:47,829 --> 00:22:49,640 Speaker 2: your job or you want to quit, take a sabbatical, 480 00:22:49,660 --> 00:22:51,770 Speaker 2: that kind of thing, then you at least you don't 481 00:22:51,780 --> 00:22:54,489 Speaker 2: have to worry about your immediate living arrangements. 482 00:22:55,250 --> 00:22:57,369 Speaker 2: Yeah, so I was just wondering how do you actually 483 00:22:57,380 --> 00:23:00,520 Speaker 2: look for apartment now? Renting? I think the bar is 484 00:23:00,530 --> 00:23:06,619 Speaker 2: lower because you don't need to like short term price 485 00:23:06,630 --> 00:23:09,300 Speaker 2: is the first one. So you set your budget first 486 00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:12,569 Speaker 2: and then you have all these different property bottles, right? 487 00:23:12,579 --> 00:23:14,099 Speaker 2: Your property guru 99 488 00:23:15,189 --> 00:23:16,010 Speaker 1: this Facebook 489 00:23:16,020 --> 00:23:19,229 Speaker 2: group. Yeah. Yeah. So sometimes the carousel, you can rent 490 00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:19,890 Speaker 2: a 491 00:23:20,469 --> 00:23:22,429 Speaker 1: car, you can buy cars on carousel too. By the way, 492 00:23:22,869 --> 00:23:23,000 Speaker 1: you 493 00:23:23,010 --> 00:23:26,599 Speaker 2: can buy a house on carousel, you can buy and 494 00:23:26,650 --> 00:23:32,629 Speaker 2: you going to then rental usually like if you are 495 00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:34,699 Speaker 2: the one renting, you don't need an agent. 496 00:23:35,199 --> 00:23:37,208 Speaker 2: Like you can have an agent to help you go 497 00:23:37,219 --> 00:23:40,188 Speaker 2: and look for the listings. But nowadays, online blog got 498 00:23:40,199 --> 00:23:42,909 Speaker 2: a lot of what you should look out for and 499 00:23:42,920 --> 00:23:44,099 Speaker 2: things like that before my 500 00:23:44,109 --> 00:23:47,198 Speaker 1: dad got his place that we live in. Now we 501 00:23:47,209 --> 00:23:49,959 Speaker 1: had to rent a place for a year while we found, like, 502 00:23:49,969 --> 00:23:51,718 Speaker 1: because we had to sell our old house. So we 503 00:23:51,729 --> 00:23:52,739 Speaker 1: had a long period of 504 00:23:52,974 --> 00:23:55,774 Speaker 1: year. So we went online. I tried Facebook. I looked 505 00:23:55,785 --> 00:23:58,744 Speaker 1: at a bunch of different places. I actually even considered 506 00:23:58,805 --> 00:24:01,354 Speaker 1: finding a place for myself too. Like, I'm like, oh, 507 00:24:01,364 --> 00:24:03,375 Speaker 1: is this a time where I can live alone for 508 00:24:03,385 --> 00:24:05,744 Speaker 1: one year? Because my partner wasn't here yet. So it's 509 00:24:05,755 --> 00:24:08,635 Speaker 1: just me. Then I looked at the the rent. I'm like, 510 00:24:08,645 --> 00:24:10,625 Speaker 1: oh dad, let's find a place together. 511 00:24:11,589 --> 00:24:12,030 Speaker 2: I help 512 00:24:12,050 --> 00:24:14,810 Speaker 1: you. I I think it's also different as a woman. 513 00:24:14,819 --> 00:24:16,770 Speaker 1: Like you want to find a place that is safe 514 00:24:16,780 --> 00:24:19,550 Speaker 1: for you where your housemates are people that you are 515 00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:23,069 Speaker 1: comfortable living with no shared bathrooms for sure. I knew 516 00:24:23,079 --> 00:24:25,339 Speaker 1: that was something that I didn't want. So it was 517 00:24:25,349 --> 00:24:26,139 Speaker 1: a bit difficult. 518 00:24:26,150 --> 00:24:28,579 Speaker 2: Sometimes people like to bring people home then it becomes 519 00:24:28,589 --> 00:24:31,129 Speaker 2: worse than a Yeah. So all these house rules are 520 00:24:31,140 --> 00:24:31,829 Speaker 2: very important. 521 00:24:32,494 --> 00:24:35,665 Speaker 1: This thing going to drag on forever. No, but for 522 00:24:35,675 --> 00:24:38,175 Speaker 1: real and like I had to think about all these 523 00:24:38,185 --> 00:24:40,864 Speaker 1: things like, ok, do I feel safe? What are the 524 00:24:40,875 --> 00:24:43,994 Speaker 1: other genders? And I realized there are gender specific listings? Yeah. 525 00:24:44,005 --> 00:24:44,454 Speaker 1: So 526 00:24:44,864 --> 00:24:50,165 Speaker 2: only for female like landlords generally prefer female, single female. 527 00:24:50,175 --> 00:24:52,104 Speaker 2: They always say because they don't want you to bring 528 00:24:52,114 --> 00:24:53,823 Speaker 2: your boyfriend or who home also. 529 00:24:54,150 --> 00:24:55,229 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true. And 530 00:24:55,239 --> 00:24:57,780 Speaker 1: also with pets like I have a dog. So I 531 00:24:57,790 --> 00:25:00,198 Speaker 1: was looking for pet friendly place. And there was really 532 00:25:00,209 --> 00:25:03,468 Speaker 1: like fun and viewing is another thing like when you 533 00:25:03,479 --> 00:25:06,750 Speaker 1: view the place. So we eventually got a one like 534 00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:09,310 Speaker 1: first story place. Oh my God guys, if you have 535 00:25:09,319 --> 00:25:10,179 Speaker 1: the opportunity, right? 536 00:25:10,250 --> 00:25:14,010 Speaker 1: Don't say first floor cockroach, cockroach sleep with me. Like no, 537 00:25:14,020 --> 00:25:17,349 Speaker 1: I'm not kidding. Right. One night I was like, am 538 00:25:17,359 --> 00:25:20,208 Speaker 1: I hallucinating? Because I saw my curtain move a bit. 539 00:25:20,369 --> 00:25:22,319 Speaker 1: Then I'm like, no, I don't think I'm this far 540 00:25:22,329 --> 00:25:25,420 Speaker 1: gone in my insomnia. Like that is something that moved. 541 00:25:25,430 --> 00:25:25,989 Speaker 1: I felt 542 00:25:27,310 --> 00:25:29,020 Speaker 2: and then next thing I was hopping on, I felt 543 00:25:29,030 --> 00:25:31,639 Speaker 1: something like my, I scream right 544 00:25:32,219 --> 00:25:35,579 Speaker 1: until now and it's like nonstop. You know, you find 545 00:25:35,589 --> 00:25:38,489 Speaker 1: cockroaches like every because they are on the first floor, 546 00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:41,159 Speaker 1: we had no experience on first floor living. That's why 547 00:25:41,170 --> 00:25:42,430 Speaker 1: we picked it. If we had known, 548 00:25:42,819 --> 00:25:44,290 Speaker 1: I don't think I would have done the same thing, 549 00:25:44,300 --> 00:25:47,119 Speaker 1: but it was easy. Like opposite. We were really very convenient. 550 00:25:47,130 --> 00:25:49,459 Speaker 1: I think convenience is something that if you have the 551 00:25:49,469 --> 00:25:53,890 Speaker 1: privilege to afford it. That should be a actually I 552 00:25:53,900 --> 00:25:54,540 Speaker 1: grew in the west 553 00:25:56,650 --> 00:25:56,680 Speaker 2: there. 554 00:26:01,300 --> 00:26:04,409 Speaker 1: Honestly, convenience is so important. How, so how did you 555 00:26:04,420 --> 00:26:05,739 Speaker 1: pick your current house? 556 00:26:05,859 --> 00:26:08,849 Speaker 2: Was it convenient? I was like half laughing when you 557 00:26:08,859 --> 00:26:09,250 Speaker 2: were saying, 558 00:26:09,324 --> 00:26:11,444 Speaker 2: don't stay first floor because I stay in the first floor. 559 00:26:11,885 --> 00:26:16,224 Speaker 2: And II I purposely bought first floor. I'm a plant 560 00:26:16,234 --> 00:26:21,484 Speaker 2: guy like I'm into house plants. So I wanted either 561 00:26:21,494 --> 00:26:24,875 Speaker 2: like ground floor or a penthouse because I wanted the 562 00:26:24,885 --> 00:26:27,655 Speaker 2: outdoor area, like a sizable outdoor area for the plant. 563 00:26:27,665 --> 00:26:30,364 Speaker 2: So then when we were looking, then this particular unit, 564 00:26:30,375 --> 00:26:33,454 Speaker 2: the outdoor area was quite big and the, the layout 565 00:26:33,464 --> 00:26:35,655 Speaker 2: was quite good. It was very square. I usual, 566 00:26:35,979 --> 00:26:37,969 Speaker 2: usual kind of thing. Like square, lay out, that kind 567 00:26:37,979 --> 00:26:41,660 Speaker 2: of thing. Yeah. Must be square. Yeah, there are definitely 568 00:26:41,670 --> 00:26:44,550 Speaker 2: tradeoffs in the sense that, like, sometimes a bit noisy. Yeah, 569 00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:47,469 Speaker 2: but we purposely like, OK cannot face the pool, cannot 570 00:26:47,479 --> 00:26:49,589 Speaker 2: face like busy road, that kind of thing. So we 571 00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:52,540 Speaker 2: managed to find somewhere. And then the other reasons were 572 00:26:52,550 --> 00:26:53,709 Speaker 2: very um 573 00:26:54,020 --> 00:26:57,280 Speaker 2: very practical. One was like, OK, cost. So actually the 574 00:26:57,290 --> 00:27:00,109 Speaker 2: way I did it was I start from like orchard, right? 575 00:27:00,310 --> 00:27:03,189 Speaker 2: And then you go like slowly two km radius, three 576 00:27:03,199 --> 00:27:07,719 Speaker 2: K radius at which point does it reach a point 577 00:27:07,729 --> 00:27:10,640 Speaker 2: where where the property is under undervalued? 578 00:27:11,530 --> 00:27:13,530 Speaker 2: A very good tip? Yeah. So you just keep going 579 00:27:13,540 --> 00:27:15,689 Speaker 2: out and it will, I can tell you like that 580 00:27:15,699 --> 00:27:18,889 Speaker 2: 20 years ago, right? People um or like when we 581 00:27:18,900 --> 00:27:21,349 Speaker 2: were growing up, people don't want to stay because like 582 00:27:21,359 --> 00:27:24,739 Speaker 2: it used to be, it used to be cemetery. People 583 00:27:24,750 --> 00:27:26,420 Speaker 2: will be like why I stay when I can stay 584 00:27:26,430 --> 00:27:27,849 Speaker 2: like novena or Newton. 585 00:27:28,380 --> 00:27:31,159 Speaker 2: But then after novena new food already too expensive, then 586 00:27:31,170 --> 00:27:34,030 Speaker 2: people will end up go. So what do you think 587 00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:37,670 Speaker 2: young adults will struggle with the most when moving out 588 00:27:37,680 --> 00:27:41,739 Speaker 2: navigating that transition. I think if I were to ever 589 00:27:41,750 --> 00:27:45,379 Speaker 2: move out I would struggle with loneliness. Is it 590 00:27:45,390 --> 00:27:48,920 Speaker 1: because you have siblings? And like all the noise at home, 591 00:27:48,930 --> 00:27:49,390 Speaker 1: I think. 592 00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:53,810 Speaker 2: Yes, because I'm used to having a relatively big family. 593 00:27:53,819 --> 00:27:57,030 Speaker 2: I mean, there's five of us last time. But generally 594 00:27:57,040 --> 00:27:58,060 Speaker 2: I do think that, 595 00:27:58,699 --> 00:28:01,390 Speaker 2: you know, sometimes at night and then you think about things, 596 00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:04,229 Speaker 2: then you get really lonely. Yeah, I have the tendency. 597 00:28:04,239 --> 00:28:06,339 Speaker 2: So for me also, because I'm quite close to my 598 00:28:06,349 --> 00:28:08,879 Speaker 2: sister so I would pop by her room and then 599 00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:09,229 Speaker 2: just 600 00:28:09,689 --> 00:28:11,709 Speaker 1: do what? Sorry, what? Cock 601 00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:13,839 Speaker 2: CCK? 602 00:28:15,170 --> 00:28:18,169 Speaker 2: Er, but I think if I were to move out, if, 603 00:28:18,180 --> 00:28:19,849 Speaker 2: let's say I have a housemate or roommate, I think 604 00:28:19,859 --> 00:28:21,229 Speaker 2: it would help. But let's say I don't want to 605 00:28:21,239 --> 00:28:23,810 Speaker 2: hang out with them like a housemate. I hate, you 606 00:28:23,959 --> 00:28:27,689 Speaker 2: must also like they can pick up on your leave 607 00:28:27,760 --> 00:28:27,930 Speaker 2: me alone. 608 00:28:32,670 --> 00:28:34,729 Speaker 1: I think based on what everyone has shared, it seems 609 00:28:34,739 --> 00:28:37,300 Speaker 1: that we've all been like, super privileged to have very 610 00:28:37,310 --> 00:28:40,420 Speaker 1: understanding parents and hearing, you know, from 611 00:28:40,494 --> 00:28:43,525 Speaker 1: you guys, hearing from my other friends. It's really crazy, 612 00:28:43,535 --> 00:28:46,474 Speaker 1: the disparity from different parents because we all have different 613 00:28:46,484 --> 00:28:49,935 Speaker 1: situations and I think it's important for us and everyone 614 00:28:49,944 --> 00:28:52,935 Speaker 1: at home watching as well to be very mindful to 615 00:28:52,944 --> 00:28:58,005 Speaker 1: not judge anyone for their situations. Everyone has different motivations 616 00:28:58,015 --> 00:29:00,785 Speaker 1: for moving out or staying at home and it is 617 00:29:00,795 --> 00:29:04,275 Speaker 1: a very sensitive topic. Er m So yeah, let's just 618 00:29:04,285 --> 00:29:05,905 Speaker 1: like be kind. 619 00:29:07,180 --> 00:29:09,040 Speaker 2: So thank you so much for watching this episode of 620 00:29:09,050 --> 00:29:11,050 Speaker 2: the Hot Pot. If you like this episode, remember to 621 00:29:11,060 --> 00:29:14,170 Speaker 2: like share and subscribe. We are also on Spotify Apple 622 00:29:14,180 --> 00:29:17,209 Speaker 2: Podcast and me listen. So don't forget to turn on 623 00:29:17,219 --> 00:29:20,160 Speaker 2: your push notifications as well. So you are notified when 624 00:29:20,170 --> 00:29:22,479 Speaker 2: a new episode is up. And thank you Brendan for 625 00:29:22,489 --> 00:29:26,729 Speaker 2: being here for having me. It was a great presence. 626 00:29:27,140 --> 00:29:31,130 Speaker 2: Such a nice break from. Sorry, excuse me, sorry. 627 00:29:35,699 --> 00:29:38,739 Speaker 2: Thank you again for listening. And if you guys have 628 00:29:38,750 --> 00:29:42,369 Speaker 2: any stories, please comment down below and ask us questions. 629 00:29:42,719 --> 00:29:46,709 Speaker 2: We will see you in the next episode. Bye bye.