1 00:00:00,009 --> 00:00:03,170 Speaker 1: Hello, and I'm Jermaine and welcome back to another episode 2 00:00:03,180 --> 00:00:05,150 Speaker 1: of Clam podcast 3 00:00:06,269 --> 00:00:09,010 Speaker 2: today. We have a big hole in our heart and 4 00:00:09,020 --> 00:00:10,250 Speaker 2: a big hole between us 5 00:00:10,289 --> 00:00:11,158 Speaker 1: between 6 00:00:11,260 --> 00:00:14,270 Speaker 2: us because Azora is unfortunately under the weather. So it's 7 00:00:14,279 --> 00:00:15,939 Speaker 2: just gonna be us. I don't think we've done an episode. 8 00:00:15,949 --> 00:00:16,540 Speaker 2: Just 9 00:00:16,549 --> 00:00:18,238 Speaker 1: us right back in season one. No, I think there 10 00:00:18,250 --> 00:00:19,270 Speaker 1: was one episode but 11 00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:21,569 Speaker 2: I think Azora was on the computer or something. Maybe 12 00:00:21,579 --> 00:00:23,799 Speaker 2: I'm not sure. But it's been a while. Basically, this 13 00:00:23,809 --> 00:00:25,200 Speaker 2: is season forever. Right. 14 00:00:25,370 --> 00:00:28,450 Speaker 1: Yes. We are going to be talking about singlehood, 15 00:00:28,459 --> 00:00:29,129 Speaker 2: single hood 16 00:00:29,209 --> 00:00:33,409 Speaker 2: as in being single, living single. What is that like? 17 00:00:33,418 --> 00:00:36,439 Speaker 2: I mean, we've talked about relationships, we talk about intimacy, 18 00:00:36,450 --> 00:00:38,918 Speaker 2: but let's talk about the flip side of it today. Um, 19 00:00:38,930 --> 00:00:41,459 Speaker 2: and the good, the bad, the ugly of being single. 20 00:00:41,470 --> 00:00:43,098 Speaker 1: Do you think there's more good, more bad or more 21 00:00:43,110 --> 00:00:45,629 Speaker 2: ugly? I do think that at different stages of your 22 00:00:45,639 --> 00:00:49,470 Speaker 2: life you need different things, but everyone should be single 23 00:00:49,479 --> 00:00:50,208 Speaker 2: at least once. But 24 00:00:50,220 --> 00:00:52,080 Speaker 1: actually we are single growing up. You know what I mean? 25 00:00:52,270 --> 00:00:54,970 Speaker 1: But it's like once we have stepped into a relationship, 26 00:00:55,020 --> 00:00:57,279 Speaker 1: I feel like it's so hard to be single again. 27 00:00:57,290 --> 00:01:00,470 Speaker 2: I completely agree because you jump from relationship to relationship 28 00:01:00,729 --> 00:01:02,950 Speaker 2: and you don't really know how to be by yourself. 29 00:01:02,959 --> 00:01:05,199 Speaker 2: And that's what happened to me. But do I like 30 00:01:05,209 --> 00:01:07,400 Speaker 2: being single? No, but I needed 31 00:01:07,410 --> 00:01:09,179 Speaker 1: it. I think that's going to be my answer. So 32 00:01:09,190 --> 00:01:12,399 Speaker 1: I don't like being single, but I need this space. So, 33 00:01:12,410 --> 00:01:15,319 Speaker 1: is it normal to like, be single? Especially at this 34 00:01:15,330 --> 00:01:17,149 Speaker 1: phase of our lives? Right. So many of my friends 35 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:18,080 Speaker 1: are getting married 36 00:01:18,484 --> 00:01:21,494 Speaker 1: Children that even has like three Children at this point already. 37 00:01:21,503 --> 00:01:24,384 Speaker 1: I'm like, what 29 years old? And I'm like, gosh, 38 00:01:24,393 --> 00:01:26,914 Speaker 1: I'm still here like working hard on my career, man. 39 00:01:26,924 --> 00:01:27,293 Speaker 1: I mean, 40 00:01:27,304 --> 00:01:30,113 Speaker 2: everyone has different priorities, right? Don't make yourself feel bad 41 00:01:30,124 --> 00:01:33,024 Speaker 2: just because that's what everyone else is doing. In fact, 42 00:01:33,033 --> 00:01:36,393 Speaker 2: according to the Pew Research Center, more people than ever 43 00:01:36,403 --> 00:01:39,863 Speaker 2: are actually single, even though it seems like everyone is 44 00:01:39,874 --> 00:01:43,953 Speaker 2: getting married. Nearly 40% of adults in the US are single, 45 00:01:43,984 --> 00:01:44,554 Speaker 2: which is up 46 00:01:44,697 --> 00:01:47,727 Speaker 2: 29% just about like 40 years ago, right? And 47 00:01:47,737 --> 00:01:50,027 Speaker 1: this is in the US. What about in the local context? 48 00:01:50,047 --> 00:01:53,367 Speaker 1: So in Singapore, according to the national population and talent 49 00:01:53,377 --> 00:02:01,337 Speaker 1: division survey, about 50% of 2848 Singaporean singles surveyed are 50 00:02:01,347 --> 00:02:01,597 Speaker 1: not 51 00:02:01,608 --> 00:02:04,697 Speaker 2: dating. No, even not married, they're not dating. Yeah, they're 52 00:02:04,708 --> 00:02:05,708 Speaker 2: like single, single, 53 00:02:05,718 --> 00:02:08,667 Speaker 1: correct. But um 80% of them said that, you know, 54 00:02:08,677 --> 00:02:10,647 Speaker 1: they intend to get married and they are aged between 55 00:02:10,657 --> 00:02:10,806 Speaker 1: 20 56 00:02:10,910 --> 00:02:13,621 Speaker 1: 1 to 35. But this number has been on a 57 00:02:13,630 --> 00:02:16,231 Speaker 1: downward trend. Why do people not just want to get 58 00:02:16,240 --> 00:02:17,050 Speaker 1: married anymore? 59 00:02:17,061 --> 00:02:18,701 Speaker 2: I don't know. I think getting married is a whole 60 00:02:18,710 --> 00:02:21,090 Speaker 2: of things. Some people don't even want to date. Right. Right. 61 00:02:21,100 --> 00:02:23,660 Speaker 2: And I think there's a few reasons why, you know, 62 00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:27,281 Speaker 2: my friends who don't date, um, I've seen that, you know, 63 00:02:27,291 --> 00:02:30,151 Speaker 2: they get very tired of even dating. Like, they have 64 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:32,150 Speaker 2: been on dating apps. They have been on every kind 65 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:34,990 Speaker 2: of dating app for year after year. That's why it's tiring. Yeah. 66 00:02:35,001 --> 00:02:37,061 Speaker 2: And they are just sick of going on dates, you know, 67 00:02:37,126 --> 00:02:40,445 Speaker 2: meeting like assholes that just want, no, that just D 68 00:02:40,455 --> 00:02:43,376 Speaker 2: T F, do you get what I mean? Um, or, 69 00:02:43,386 --> 00:02:46,076 Speaker 2: or maybe they just keep a very small social circle. 70 00:02:46,085 --> 00:02:48,145 Speaker 2: Don't really go out. Where will you meet someone if 71 00:02:48,156 --> 00:02:49,995 Speaker 2: you don't really go out and you don't like dating apps? 72 00:02:50,156 --> 00:02:52,546 Speaker 1: I feel like there's a high chance you might meet 73 00:02:52,555 --> 00:02:55,686 Speaker 1: someone in your workspace because that's where you go every 74 00:02:55,695 --> 00:02:56,005 Speaker 1: single 75 00:02:56,016 --> 00:02:59,095 Speaker 2: day. Right. But it's kind of weird to date in 76 00:02:59,106 --> 00:03:00,175 Speaker 2: your workspace. Right. 77 00:03:00,186 --> 00:03:02,186 Speaker 1: But I find, like, in the same workspace, maybe you 78 00:03:02,195 --> 00:03:03,235 Speaker 1: might find someone who 79 00:03:03,339 --> 00:03:05,698 Speaker 1: understand you a bit better. True. That's true. Yeah. Compared 80 00:03:05,710 --> 00:03:07,550 Speaker 1: to a friend of a friend, for example. But it's 81 00:03:07,559 --> 00:03:10,800 Speaker 1: not everyone who gets to find someone suitable for him 82 00:03:10,809 --> 00:03:11,149 Speaker 1: or her in a 83 00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:14,619 Speaker 2: workspace. Yeah, exactly. Um, some people just have different priorities, like, 84 00:03:14,630 --> 00:03:17,380 Speaker 2: wanting to concentrate on their studies at the moment because 85 00:03:17,389 --> 00:03:19,888 Speaker 2: being in a relationship it takes a lot of time 86 00:03:19,899 --> 00:03:23,399 Speaker 2: and commitment and money. Yes. Right. And, like, you might 87 00:03:23,410 --> 00:03:25,388 Speaker 2: not have that as a student who's just trying to 88 00:03:25,399 --> 00:03:28,070 Speaker 2: support yourself and trying to get, like, your, a grades 89 00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:28,149 Speaker 2: or 90 00:03:28,160 --> 00:03:29,449 Speaker 1: something. Right. I fully agree. 91 00:03:29,733 --> 00:03:32,482 Speaker 1: And a lot of my friends, they actually prefer to 92 00:03:32,494 --> 00:03:35,194 Speaker 1: leave dating to chance. Ok. You know, like in Chinese 93 00:03:35,203 --> 00:03:37,544 Speaker 1: New Year period, when your relatives ask you when you're 94 00:03:37,554 --> 00:03:41,904 Speaker 1: getting a girlfriend as they call it, leaving it up 95 00:03:41,914 --> 00:03:43,533 Speaker 1: to fate because living up 96 00:03:43,544 --> 00:03:45,934 Speaker 2: to fate, you walk up to you to walk into 97 00:03:45,944 --> 00:03:47,714 Speaker 2: someone on the street. They are like, what? So cute, 98 00:03:47,723 --> 00:03:48,583 Speaker 2: the Korean drama in 99 00:03:48,593 --> 00:03:52,973 Speaker 1: the k drama. But I agree, like, I wouldn't hop 100 00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:55,703 Speaker 1: on a dating app in hopes of finding someone. 101 00:03:55,899 --> 00:03:58,880 Speaker 1: I feel like that person then for me will be 102 00:03:58,889 --> 00:04:00,750 Speaker 1: right in front of my eyes. One Friday. 103 00:04:00,759 --> 00:04:04,279 Speaker 2: Wow. Ok. So you, but, but your eyes must be 104 00:04:04,289 --> 00:04:04,928 Speaker 2: clear 105 00:04:04,940 --> 00:04:05,080 Speaker 1: if 106 00:04:06,220 --> 00:04:08,740 Speaker 2: you miss or something like that, you never know. Right. Um, 107 00:04:08,750 --> 00:04:14,339 Speaker 2: there are other alternate priorities apart from just romance in life, right? 108 00:04:14,350 --> 00:04:17,269 Speaker 2: Or getting married, having a family. Some people don't even 109 00:04:17,279 --> 00:04:19,709 Speaker 2: have that at the front of their mind. I think 110 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:22,760 Speaker 2: some reasons that people want to really stay single. Um, 111 00:04:22,769 --> 00:04:25,290 Speaker 2: one of this is actually something 112 00:04:25,454 --> 00:04:28,875 Speaker 2: noble and very, not very talked about, which is you 113 00:04:28,885 --> 00:04:31,035 Speaker 2: have to care for your family. If let's say you 114 00:04:31,045 --> 00:04:33,345 Speaker 2: have someone in the family who needs a full time caregiver, 115 00:04:33,355 --> 00:04:35,114 Speaker 2: how are you going to do that and have a 116 00:04:35,125 --> 00:04:37,695 Speaker 2: relationship at the same time? It's very hard for your 117 00:04:37,704 --> 00:04:39,424 Speaker 2: partner to understand that is a 118 00:04:39,434 --> 00:04:42,125 Speaker 1: really huge commitment. And honestly, if I were in 119 00:04:42,339 --> 00:04:44,849 Speaker 1: their shoes, I don't know if I will be able to, like, 120 00:04:44,859 --> 00:04:47,500 Speaker 1: execute that position perfectly. So, really kudos to all the 121 00:04:47,510 --> 00:04:50,640 Speaker 1: people out there who are, you know, er, adopting such 122 00:04:50,649 --> 00:04:52,178 Speaker 1: a role in the family. Some 123 00:04:52,190 --> 00:04:56,980 Speaker 2: people also see that same satisfaction in being single where 124 00:04:56,988 --> 00:04:59,730 Speaker 2: like romance or being in a relationship doesn't give them, er, m, 125 00:04:59,738 --> 00:05:02,100 Speaker 2: how do you say like, the, what would they need 126 00:05:02,109 --> 00:05:04,350 Speaker 2: in life? They like what, like, 127 00:05:05,209 --> 00:05:05,480 Speaker 2: hm. 128 00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:08,988 Speaker 2: Like some people, ok. For example, some people want to 129 00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:11,600 Speaker 2: be in a relationship because they want sex. Right? But 130 00:05:11,609 --> 00:05:14,250 Speaker 2: let's say if you are, you're asexuals, for example. Right? 131 00:05:14,260 --> 00:05:17,329 Speaker 2: And you don't really need sex or you're not open 132 00:05:17,339 --> 00:05:18,928 Speaker 2: to sex, you don't want sex in your life, then 133 00:05:18,940 --> 00:05:22,359 Speaker 2: why would you need to have a partner for that? 134 00:05:22,459 --> 00:05:25,089 Speaker 1: And as you mentioned in previous episodes, there are certain 135 00:05:25,100 --> 00:05:26,409 Speaker 1: people who enjoy 136 00:05:26,670 --> 00:05:29,928 Speaker 1: going out with different people every single night. Yeah. Like 137 00:05:29,940 --> 00:05:31,769 Speaker 1: they see them for one time and that's it. They 138 00:05:31,779 --> 00:05:35,260 Speaker 1: don't want that commitment that time given to the other party, 139 00:05:35,269 --> 00:05:37,329 Speaker 1: they just want to have fun and go maybe that's 140 00:05:37,339 --> 00:05:38,899 Speaker 1: why they feel like they are not ready to settle 141 00:05:38,910 --> 00:05:39,640 Speaker 1: down just yet. 142 00:05:39,649 --> 00:05:42,079 Speaker 2: So let's talk about what we like about being single. 143 00:05:43,140 --> 00:05:46,469 Speaker 1: I love the extra time that I have. I find 144 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:48,910 Speaker 1: that when I'm single. Right. I actually spend more time 145 00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:51,959 Speaker 1: on my friends and family. True. Right. It's like I 146 00:05:51,970 --> 00:05:54,170 Speaker 1: just have so many things on my mind that I 147 00:05:54,178 --> 00:05:57,350 Speaker 1: want someone to talk about. So I will automatically go 148 00:05:57,359 --> 00:05:59,739 Speaker 1: to my friends and my family. But if I have 149 00:05:59,750 --> 00:06:02,309 Speaker 1: a partner, for example, then maybe I would like, just 150 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:04,579 Speaker 1: tell him what a few and then less time for 151 00:06:04,589 --> 00:06:05,910 Speaker 1: friends and family. I do 152 00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:09,290 Speaker 2: think, er, time spent with your partner and time spent 153 00:06:09,299 --> 00:06:11,309 Speaker 2: with your friends. Usually when I'm in a relationship. 154 00:06:11,649 --> 00:06:13,649 Speaker 2: Um, sorry to my friends. But I kind of neglect 155 00:06:13,660 --> 00:06:16,919 Speaker 2: them a little bit, especially in the, in the like, honeymoons, 156 00:06:17,209 --> 00:06:18,940 Speaker 2: you know, you just want to be with your partner. 157 00:06:18,950 --> 00:06:22,019 Speaker 2: And then unfortunately, if I have like a free weekend, 158 00:06:22,029 --> 00:06:24,320 Speaker 2: what am I going to choose? Being my partner or 159 00:06:24,410 --> 00:06:24,559 Speaker 2: my 160 00:06:24,570 --> 00:06:25,899 Speaker 1: friend? But I feel like you are the kind of 161 00:06:25,910 --> 00:06:28,079 Speaker 1: girl who would bring your partner to see your friends. Oh, 162 00:06:28,089 --> 00:06:28,579 Speaker 1: that's true. 163 00:06:28,600 --> 00:06:30,459 Speaker 2: Yeah. Correct. Yeah. 164 00:06:30,470 --> 00:06:34,380 Speaker 1: Spend one good night together. Oh, hey, 165 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:35,690 Speaker 1: over food, 166 00:06:35,850 --> 00:06:39,470 Speaker 2: drink and drink. Yeah. Correct. Correct. But I also do 167 00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:41,910 Speaker 2: feel that the biggest word that comes up to me 168 00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:43,829 Speaker 2: is freedom. Ah, freedom. 169 00:06:44,869 --> 00:06:47,109 Speaker 2: Yeah. It's like you don't have to answer to anybody. 170 00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:48,750 Speaker 2: I don't have to text anyone. Good night. I don't 171 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:50,750 Speaker 2: have to tell you if I go out like, you know, 172 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:53,720 Speaker 2: that I'm home, I'm safe because you are not responsible 173 00:06:53,730 --> 00:06:57,279 Speaker 2: to anyone, correct yourself. But I have found that because 174 00:06:57,290 --> 00:06:59,159 Speaker 2: of that and the freedom I tend to make very 175 00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:00,850 Speaker 2: stupid decisions so very 176 00:07:00,859 --> 00:07:02,049 Speaker 1: happy for, you know, Jimmy. 177 00:07:04,839 --> 00:07:07,869 Speaker 1: Ok. So let's hear from some of our harsh listeners. Um, 178 00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:10,119 Speaker 1: what did they like about being single? Some of them 179 00:07:10,130 --> 00:07:12,510 Speaker 1: are single. Now, some of them used to be single. Er, 180 00:07:12,519 --> 00:07:15,089 Speaker 1: Kelly says more freedom to do anything. 181 00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:17,079 Speaker 2: See freedom. That's the thing, right? 182 00:07:17,089 --> 00:07:20,799 Speaker 1: And we says, no need to live up to the society. 183 00:07:20,809 --> 00:07:23,920 Speaker 1: Expectations are very deep. Like what kind of 184 00:07:23,929 --> 00:07:29,200 Speaker 2: expectations? Very, very, I think expectation to be married. Have 185 00:07:29,209 --> 00:07:29,920 Speaker 2: a kid. 186 00:07:29,929 --> 00:07:31,940 Speaker 1: The root. 187 00:07:32,295 --> 00:07:34,535 Speaker 2: O OK. Collette says I have a lot of time 188 00:07:34,545 --> 00:07:37,015 Speaker 2: to myself. I can save money and it's just me, 189 00:07:37,024 --> 00:07:38,204 Speaker 2: my dog and I, ah, 190 00:07:39,475 --> 00:07:42,394 Speaker 1: that's so nice. This other person says there's no need 191 00:07:42,404 --> 00:07:47,364 Speaker 1: to worry about living up to expectations after a failed marriage. Oh, gosh. Oh, man. 192 00:07:47,375 --> 00:07:50,924 Speaker 2: I mean, it is a risk. I think any relationship 193 00:07:50,934 --> 00:07:53,045 Speaker 2: that you get into breaking up with risk, marriage, you know, 194 00:07:53,054 --> 00:07:54,165 Speaker 2: divorce is a risk. 195 00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:57,774 Speaker 1: Another male is the Renault says your happiness depends on you, 196 00:07:57,785 --> 00:08:00,024 Speaker 1: not on others and no expectations, 197 00:08:00,170 --> 00:08:02,489 Speaker 1: no disappointment to be fair. I feel like this is 198 00:08:02,500 --> 00:08:04,828 Speaker 1: applicable even though you're in a relationship. Yeah. I mean, 199 00:08:04,839 --> 00:08:07,380 Speaker 1: who says that your happiness depends on your partner, even 200 00:08:07,390 --> 00:08:08,049 Speaker 1: if you are attached. 201 00:08:08,059 --> 00:08:10,470 Speaker 2: Right. That is true. Yeah. I think even if you're 202 00:08:10,480 --> 00:08:12,510 Speaker 2: in a relationship, you should make sure that you are 203 00:08:12,519 --> 00:08:16,450 Speaker 2: dependent on yourself for your own happiness. Er, 17 March 204 00:08:16,459 --> 00:08:19,980 Speaker 2: says it's liberating to not have to answer to anybody 205 00:08:19,989 --> 00:08:22,149 Speaker 2: except my own mother. Ah, yeah, I 206 00:08:22,160 --> 00:08:24,220 Speaker 1: love that. How come you never include your father? 207 00:08:24,230 --> 00:08:26,790 Speaker 2: I don't know why she never include her father. But 208 00:08:26,799 --> 00:08:28,160 Speaker 2: can I read to you because we were talking, 209 00:08:28,225 --> 00:08:30,394 Speaker 2: talking about dating apps? Right. Correct. Let me just segue 210 00:08:30,415 --> 00:08:33,094 Speaker 2: for a bit. Um Speaking of 17, March, she's on 211 00:08:33,104 --> 00:08:34,094 Speaker 2: a lot of dating apps, 212 00:08:34,104 --> 00:08:36,304 Speaker 1: right? 17 March. She is Jimmy's good friend. 213 00:08:36,405 --> 00:08:37,895 Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. So she's on a lot of dating apps. 214 00:08:37,905 --> 00:08:41,515 Speaker 2: She's like the ultimate single, single lady, right? Um You 215 00:08:41,525 --> 00:08:43,265 Speaker 2: know of this app called Hinge. Yeah, 216 00:08:43,275 --> 00:08:45,275 Speaker 1: I haven't been on yet. I heard of it. So 217 00:08:45,284 --> 00:08:50,195 Speaker 2: apparently hinge you can put um descriptions on your dating profiles. 218 00:08:50,205 --> 00:08:53,844 Speaker 2: This guy put, I'm convinced that I was a six 219 00:08:53,854 --> 00:08:56,215 Speaker 2: but due to inflation, I became a 10. 220 00:08:57,380 --> 00:08:59,349 Speaker 2: The one thing you should know about me is I 221 00:08:59,359 --> 00:09:03,109 Speaker 2: can cook and I can remove your makeup for you. Oh, yeah, 222 00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:07,080 Speaker 2: that's quite cute. Right. I think it's quite cute. Someone put, 223 00:09:07,090 --> 00:09:10,830 Speaker 2: I'll fall for you if you push me over. I mean, 224 00:09:10,840 --> 00:09:11,329 Speaker 2: please tell 225 00:09:11,340 --> 00:09:13,229 Speaker 1: me she went for the second one. Kudos for 226 00:09:14,239 --> 00:09:17,950 Speaker 2: kudos for, you know, creativity. This is why some people 227 00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:20,770 Speaker 2: stay away from dating apps because it's like, what was that? 228 00:09:22,190 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 1: But it's a good platform to get to meet more 229 00:09:24,289 --> 00:09:26,780 Speaker 1: people and get to understand uh more on what you 230 00:09:26,789 --> 00:09:28,950 Speaker 1: like and what you don't like. Um I like Gray 231 00:09:28,960 --> 00:09:32,340 Speaker 1: Grace's comment. No betrayal 232 00:09:33,460 --> 00:09:34,429 Speaker 1: a bit dull, but 233 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:36,789 Speaker 2: it's true. But your friends can betray you to agree. 234 00:09:38,669 --> 00:09:41,669 Speaker 2: It's true. Anyone can betray you in your life. 235 00:09:41,789 --> 00:09:44,630 Speaker 1: But on the other hand, I feel like being single, 236 00:09:45,299 --> 00:09:48,640 Speaker 1: makes me feel a little empty sometimes. Oh, yeah, like 237 00:09:48,650 --> 00:09:50,569 Speaker 1: I mentioned after a full day of work, I have 238 00:09:50,580 --> 00:09:52,780 Speaker 1: so many thoughts in my mind and I would really 239 00:09:52,789 --> 00:09:55,348 Speaker 1: like to share my feelings with someone and 240 00:09:55,849 --> 00:09:56,859 Speaker 1: then you find that you have no one 241 00:09:56,869 --> 00:09:59,608 Speaker 2: to go to. That was the biggest thing when I 242 00:09:59,729 --> 00:10:02,829 Speaker 2: broke up with my ex was obviously, you know, you 243 00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:05,218 Speaker 2: can talk to your friends, you can talk to your family. 244 00:10:05,309 --> 00:10:08,880 Speaker 2: But I maintain that it's not the same having a 245 00:10:08,890 --> 00:10:14,218 Speaker 2: partner that you can just pour out everything to unfiltered, unfiltered. Yeah. 246 00:10:14,229 --> 00:10:16,780 Speaker 2: So I did feel quite lonely, you know, in those 247 00:10:16,789 --> 00:10:19,890 Speaker 2: first few weeks where firstly, I came home to no one. 248 00:10:20,010 --> 00:10:23,380 Speaker 2: I had no one to text and yeah, it was 249 00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:23,619 Speaker 2: a bit of 250 00:10:23,726 --> 00:10:27,565 Speaker 2: an adjustment for sure. But after that, I kind of 251 00:10:27,575 --> 00:10:29,895 Speaker 2: just fell into it and I did enjoy being single. 252 00:10:29,905 --> 00:10:32,015 Speaker 1: Of course, also has a good side. For example, you 253 00:10:32,026 --> 00:10:34,194 Speaker 1: get to save a lot of money. Yeah. Yeah, you 254 00:10:34,205 --> 00:10:36,056 Speaker 1: get to save a lot of time, you get to 255 00:10:36,065 --> 00:10:39,026 Speaker 1: enjoy more things on your own. That's true. I feel 256 00:10:39,035 --> 00:10:40,846 Speaker 1: like a lot of my friends who are single, they 257 00:10:40,976 --> 00:10:45,106 Speaker 1: really use this opportunity to travel alone and that's such 258 00:10:45,116 --> 00:10:47,405 Speaker 1: a great idea for you to understand yourself better. Yeah. 259 00:10:47,416 --> 00:10:47,846 Speaker 1: I feel 260 00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:50,575 Speaker 2: like if you, I mean, if you're in a relationship, yes, 261 00:10:50,585 --> 00:10:51,515 Speaker 2: you can travel alone 262 00:10:51,601 --> 00:10:54,742 Speaker 2: and there's nothing wrong with that. Um, but if you 263 00:10:54,752 --> 00:10:57,141 Speaker 2: only have a few, like, annual leave days a year 264 00:10:57,151 --> 00:10:59,651 Speaker 2: you would want to utilize that and, you know, spend 265 00:10:59,660 --> 00:11:02,302 Speaker 2: some time with your partner overseas. Right? I think the 266 00:11:02,312 --> 00:11:05,691 Speaker 2: whole concept of being single is just, or being happily 267 00:11:05,702 --> 00:11:09,361 Speaker 2: single is just something that society has not fully accepted. 268 00:11:09,392 --> 00:11:12,762 Speaker 2: You think? Because, like, let's say I tell you, right? 269 00:11:12,771 --> 00:11:14,611 Speaker 2: Like at my age, let's say I tell you, oh, 270 00:11:14,622 --> 00:11:17,351 Speaker 2: you know, I've actually been single 28 years of my life. 271 00:11:17,581 --> 00:11:19,331 Speaker 2: Usually the reaction would be like, what? 272 00:11:19,659 --> 00:11:23,719 Speaker 2: Yeah. Evergreen. Yeah. Evergreen. Evergreen. The reaction will be like, oh, 273 00:11:23,729 --> 00:11:26,549 Speaker 2: like what's wrong with you kind of thing? You know 274 00:11:26,559 --> 00:11:27,010 Speaker 2: what I mean? 275 00:11:27,909 --> 00:11:31,488 Speaker 1: Do you think this is the society's expectation of people? Yeah. 276 00:11:31,500 --> 00:11:33,239 Speaker 1: I don't know. I have a friend who is, er, 277 00:11:33,250 --> 00:11:36,549 Speaker 1: 50 this year. She, she has dated a few people, 278 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:39,710 Speaker 1: of course, but she is still unmarried. She's single, she 279 00:11:39,719 --> 00:11:42,440 Speaker 1: cares a lot about her family. Er, maybe because she 280 00:11:42,450 --> 00:11:44,369 Speaker 1: feels like she hasn't met the one yet. But she's 281 00:11:44,380 --> 00:11:45,500 Speaker 1: in no rush. 282 00:11:45,940 --> 00:11:48,380 Speaker 1: That's the thing. She's ok to just go out meet 283 00:11:48,390 --> 00:11:51,270 Speaker 1: new people and then just come home to a family. 284 00:11:51,280 --> 00:11:53,809 Speaker 1: That's cool. At 50 years old. That's really cool. I 285 00:11:53,820 --> 00:11:54,789 Speaker 1: don't know if we can do that. 286 00:11:54,950 --> 00:12:01,030 Speaker 2: I mean, we see, we see how we go. Yeah, definitely. 287 00:12:01,039 --> 00:12:03,729 Speaker 2: I think being happily single is something that if you 288 00:12:03,739 --> 00:12:06,840 Speaker 2: find it works for you just because not everyone is 289 00:12:06,849 --> 00:12:09,659 Speaker 2: happily single. Right. Yeah. Maybe, maybe you just want to 290 00:12:09,669 --> 00:12:10,929 Speaker 2: be alone. It can be 291 00:12:11,299 --> 00:12:14,169 Speaker 2: a very fulfilling life, a very meaningful life as well. 292 00:12:14,179 --> 00:12:16,590 Speaker 1: I like one of our P D stories. Um, she 293 00:12:16,599 --> 00:12:20,849 Speaker 1: says she's always viewed romantic relationships as a luxury rather 294 00:12:20,859 --> 00:12:23,799 Speaker 1: than a necessity. I, I, I fully love that. So 295 00:12:23,809 --> 00:12:25,650 Speaker 1: if you're involved in the relationship when it comes, then 296 00:12:25,659 --> 00:12:29,200 Speaker 1: sure embrace it. Er, which one? This must be PDF? 297 00:12:29,289 --> 00:12:32,070 Speaker 2: Ok. Yeah. PDF. PDF. 298 00:12:33,130 --> 00:12:37,320 Speaker 1: Yeah. PDF. Correct. So she could never understand how there 299 00:12:37,330 --> 00:12:39,390 Speaker 1: are people who make it their lives go to be 300 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:40,260 Speaker 1: partnered up. 301 00:12:40,270 --> 00:12:42,299 Speaker 2: PDF has been single for 25 years. 302 00:12:42,309 --> 00:12:45,150 Speaker 1: She's only recently found her partner so happy for her. 303 00:12:45,409 --> 00:12:49,260 Speaker 2: So when she told me she's been single, she's evergreen. Right. Right. 304 00:12:49,270 --> 00:12:50,659 Speaker 2: A little part of me was like, 305 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:51,949 Speaker 2: why? 306 00:12:52,380 --> 00:12:54,950 Speaker 1: Yeah. You know, he is an outgoing person. How come 307 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:57,340 Speaker 1: you haven't met someone who can vibe with you? 308 00:12:57,349 --> 00:13:00,650 Speaker 2: Exactly. Exactly. And, and she meets so many people, you know, 309 00:13:00,659 --> 00:13:02,699 Speaker 2: she has so many friends but I think it was 310 00:13:02,710 --> 00:13:05,450 Speaker 2: a conscious effort on her part not to give and 311 00:13:05,460 --> 00:13:08,260 Speaker 2: open her heart to someone that maybe did not deserve it. Correct. 312 00:13:08,270 --> 00:13:10,500 Speaker 1: Correct. And I think it's safe to say that PDF 313 00:13:10,510 --> 00:13:12,900 Speaker 1: is in the honeymoon phase for now, but she is 314 00:13:12,909 --> 00:13:13,429 Speaker 1: still safe 315 00:13:13,526 --> 00:13:16,934 Speaker 1: that, you know, there is nothing bad or wrong about singlehood. 316 00:13:16,945 --> 00:13:19,695 Speaker 1: In fact, singles should take it as an opportunity to 317 00:13:19,705 --> 00:13:21,916 Speaker 1: really do whatever they want in life because the only 318 00:13:21,926 --> 00:13:24,216 Speaker 1: person they have to care about is themselves. 319 00:13:24,645 --> 00:13:27,574 Speaker 2: I like that. So I think PDF struggles with, depending 320 00:13:27,585 --> 00:13:30,616 Speaker 2: on someone apart from herself because she's been single for 321 00:13:30,625 --> 00:13:34,445 Speaker 2: 25 years. So, you know, finding a partner now and 322 00:13:34,455 --> 00:13:34,596 Speaker 2: then 323 00:13:34,692 --> 00:13:36,410 Speaker 2: having to try and trust them and put a little 324 00:13:36,421 --> 00:13:38,812 Speaker 2: bit of that faith and dependency on them is something 325 00:13:38,822 --> 00:13:39,651 Speaker 2: new for her. 326 00:13:39,660 --> 00:13:41,552 Speaker 1: But it's one step that she has to take because 327 00:13:41,562 --> 00:13:43,671 Speaker 1: now that she's in a relationship, it takes two hands 328 00:13:43,682 --> 00:13:45,511 Speaker 1: to clap. You have to learn to trust the other 329 00:13:45,521 --> 00:13:47,742 Speaker 1: person for this relationship to work 330 00:13:47,752 --> 00:13:51,901 Speaker 2: up. Absolutely. P D N says I love being single. 331 00:13:51,910 --> 00:13:54,660 Speaker 2: I had no problems being single. I got my own money, 332 00:13:54,671 --> 00:13:55,801 Speaker 2: I got my own time. 333 00:13:56,109 --> 00:13:58,880 Speaker 2: But, you know, as I approached my mid twenties, I 334 00:13:58,890 --> 00:14:01,929 Speaker 2: felt a desire to kind of have a family, right? 335 00:14:01,940 --> 00:14:04,039 Speaker 2: And it takes two hands to clap to have a family. 336 00:14:04,049 --> 00:14:06,320 Speaker 2: So eventually she found some, you know, 337 00:14:06,549 --> 00:14:09,598 Speaker 2: um I'm lucky to have a family. With no lah. 338 00:14:09,609 --> 00:14:13,400 Speaker 2: But she, she loves this guy. Right? As a family now, 339 00:14:13,409 --> 00:14:18,179 Speaker 2: a little baby. So, yeah, a little family unit she 340 00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:21,719 Speaker 2: says was I happier, single. I can't exactly say so. 341 00:14:21,729 --> 00:14:23,950 Speaker 2: But I'm happy today too. It's just a different kind 342 00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:24,559 Speaker 2: of happiness. 343 00:14:24,570 --> 00:14:26,429 Speaker 1: Yeah. Every time she speaks about her daughter, I can 344 00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:29,989 Speaker 1: see that glow and that love in her eyes and a, 345 00:14:30,109 --> 00:14:30,729 Speaker 1: that really, 346 00:14:31,210 --> 00:14:31,229 Speaker 2: yeah, 347 00:14:33,530 --> 00:14:34,859 Speaker 2: she looks excited. 348 00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:38,119 Speaker 2: No, but I mean, it's a different kind of fulfillment 349 00:14:38,130 --> 00:14:40,809 Speaker 2: in your life, right? For single when you're not single. 350 00:14:40,900 --> 00:14:43,190 Speaker 1: So, to our listeners out there, whether you are single 351 00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:47,530 Speaker 1: by choice or not, um, there's absolutely no shame in that. Ok, 352 00:14:47,539 --> 00:14:50,710 Speaker 1: after all, there are many advantages to being single. So 353 00:14:50,719 --> 00:14:52,840 Speaker 1: first one, did you know that more people who are 354 00:14:52,849 --> 00:14:55,020 Speaker 1: single actually do more exercise? 355 00:14:55,030 --> 00:14:56,979 Speaker 2: Yeah. Whenever my exes break up with me. Right. They 356 00:14:56,989 --> 00:15:00,979 Speaker 2: suddenly get very skinny. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Talking 357 00:15:00,989 --> 00:15:01,650 Speaker 2: about you. 358 00:15:02,260 --> 00:15:05,510 Speaker 2: No, it's true. Like the strange thing is during the 359 00:15:05,520 --> 00:15:07,429 Speaker 2: whole relationship you would think you, when you want to 360 00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:10,130 Speaker 2: keep a girl you would keep fit. Correct. But they 361 00:15:10,140 --> 00:15:13,500 Speaker 2: refuse to. But the moment that I'm gone, they're like, oh, shit, 362 00:15:13,510 --> 00:15:15,530 Speaker 2: I'm on the market now. I need to put more 363 00:15:15,539 --> 00:15:18,150 Speaker 2: effort into my looks and they drop like 15 K 364 00:15:18,159 --> 00:15:20,250 Speaker 2: G in like two months. Yes. When you're single you 365 00:15:20,260 --> 00:15:22,169 Speaker 2: have more time to go work out classes 366 00:15:22,534 --> 00:15:25,994 Speaker 2: to take care of yourself. And, um, I guess you 367 00:15:26,005 --> 00:15:27,695 Speaker 2: have better health overall. Really, 368 00:15:27,705 --> 00:15:30,474 Speaker 1: really, really, so, a variety of studies have looked at 369 00:15:30,484 --> 00:15:34,994 Speaker 1: the impact marriage and singlehood can have on health in 370 00:15:35,005 --> 00:15:37,674 Speaker 1: a study conducted in 20 oh six. Uh, rates of 371 00:15:37,684 --> 00:15:42,614 Speaker 1: heart disease were lowest amongst individuals who had never been married. So, what, 372 00:15:43,140 --> 00:15:47,900 Speaker 2: so marriage causes you so much stress. That, is that 373 00:15:47,909 --> 00:15:48,960 Speaker 2: what they're trying to do? Here's what I 374 00:15:48,969 --> 00:15:51,729 Speaker 1: think. So, after you get married, right, you get kids 375 00:15:51,809 --> 00:15:54,309 Speaker 1: and then once you get kids, right, your everyday life 376 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:55,909 Speaker 1: becomes like a routine, you have to take care of 377 00:15:55,919 --> 00:15:59,510 Speaker 1: the kids. And then so, right. So whenever you get 378 00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:01,830 Speaker 1: pockets of time, you just don't care, you just want 379 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:03,150 Speaker 1: to eat whatever makes you happy 380 00:16:03,340 --> 00:16:06,190 Speaker 1: snack, you cut down on exercise because you have no 381 00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:07,409 Speaker 1: time because your kids 382 00:16:07,419 --> 00:16:09,429 Speaker 2: are a priority. Your family is a priority and then 383 00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:12,109 Speaker 2: you take a back seat. Right. Yeah. Actually that's one 384 00:16:12,119 --> 00:16:14,989 Speaker 2: of my biggest fears of, you know, being in a relationship, 385 00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:17,849 Speaker 2: being married and that your health will take a back 386 00:16:17,859 --> 00:16:21,309 Speaker 2: seat that me myself will take a back seat. I mean, I, 387 00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:24,309 Speaker 2: I do think in a relationship, um, 388 00:16:24,549 --> 00:16:26,679 Speaker 2: you should still take care of your health. In fact, 389 00:16:26,809 --> 00:16:29,559 Speaker 2: the both of you should make a commitment to care 390 00:16:29,570 --> 00:16:32,159 Speaker 2: about each other's health in terms of what you eat, 391 00:16:32,169 --> 00:16:35,539 Speaker 2: in terms of working out together. Maybe I think it's possible. 392 00:16:35,549 --> 00:16:37,320 Speaker 1: Right. That's why a lot of couples, they do a 393 00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:40,369 Speaker 1: lot of couple workout. Oh, together. That's a good way 394 00:16:40,380 --> 00:16:41,090 Speaker 1: to bond. And, 395 00:16:43,369 --> 00:16:44,030 Speaker 1: yeah, that's it. 396 00:16:44,369 --> 00:16:46,219 Speaker 2: How many calories does it burn? Women 397 00:16:46,229 --> 00:16:50,210 Speaker 1: burn an average of 69 calories per minute. 69 398 00:16:50,909 --> 00:16:53,479 Speaker 2: 69 calories. I 399 00:16:53,489 --> 00:16:57,820 Speaker 1: once seen an article saying that by French kissing your partner. 400 00:16:58,099 --> 00:17:02,239 Speaker 1: I don't know what the normal kissing cannot. Maybe because 401 00:17:02,250 --> 00:17:05,510 Speaker 1: your tongue exert some energy. You burn 26 calories, but 402 00:17:05,520 --> 00:17:06,040 Speaker 1: I don't believe 403 00:17:06,050 --> 00:17:08,458 Speaker 2: it. 26 calories is a lot. You know, like sometimes 404 00:17:08,469 --> 00:17:10,250 Speaker 2: I'm running on a treadmill. It takes quite long to 405 00:17:10,260 --> 00:17:15,209 Speaker 2: hit 20 calories being single also means very strangely less 406 00:17:15,219 --> 00:17:19,160 Speaker 2: house work. Um, for women. It's a very strange statistic. 407 00:17:19,170 --> 00:17:22,329 Speaker 1: Remember what we talked about mental load. Mental load. Yes. Yes. 408 00:17:22,339 --> 00:17:26,849 Speaker 1: Women always want to carry the burden of the household 409 00:17:26,859 --> 00:17:27,869 Speaker 1: chores because they feel like 410 00:17:28,015 --> 00:17:29,574 Speaker 1: the men can never do it as well as they can. 411 00:17:29,584 --> 00:17:30,024 Speaker 1: I wouldn't 412 00:17:30,035 --> 00:17:32,824 Speaker 2: say the man can never do it. Like I, I, ok, well, 413 00:17:32,834 --> 00:17:35,055 Speaker 2: I don't really do household chores but if my man, 414 00:17:35,064 --> 00:17:37,915 Speaker 2: like throws his clothes everywhere, I will gladly, you know, 415 00:17:37,925 --> 00:17:40,665 Speaker 2: pick it up because I just feel like, yeah, I 416 00:17:40,675 --> 00:17:42,265 Speaker 2: want it to be neat and I don't really care 417 00:17:42,275 --> 00:17:43,744 Speaker 2: that you throw it around. You know what I mean? 418 00:17:43,755 --> 00:17:45,984 Speaker 2: It's not like a mental load I'm taking on but 419 00:17:45,994 --> 00:17:48,675 Speaker 2: it piles up at the end of the day, I guess. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. 420 00:17:48,685 --> 00:17:53,505 Speaker 2: Apparently according to a 2008 study getting married means an 421 00:17:53,515 --> 00:17:57,694 Speaker 2: extra seven hours a week of housework for women. 422 00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:02,329 Speaker 2: Yeah. And then for men, one hour less of that. Yeah. 423 00:18:03,430 --> 00:18:05,069 Speaker 1: So, this is how women, you know, that you should 424 00:18:05,079 --> 00:18:06,489 Speaker 1: let it go, let 425 00:18:06,500 --> 00:18:08,479 Speaker 2: it go. If you don't like to clean the house, 426 00:18:08,489 --> 00:18:09,438 Speaker 2: don't get married. 427 00:18:09,449 --> 00:18:12,729 Speaker 1: No, let your husband do it. And then if he 428 00:18:12,739 --> 00:18:14,069 Speaker 1: does a shitty job, right. 429 00:18:14,959 --> 00:18:16,969 Speaker 1: Just greet your teeth and bear with it. 430 00:18:16,979 --> 00:18:20,290 Speaker 2: Actually. You know what's funny? Um, you know, Vernon. Right. Yeah. 431 00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:22,599 Speaker 2: So Vernon is married to Jane and in all their 432 00:18:22,609 --> 00:18:26,639 Speaker 2: years of marriage, from what I know, Vernon genuinely enjoys 433 00:18:26,650 --> 00:18:30,550 Speaker 2: doing housework. That's good. He buys the best Dyson vacuum 434 00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:32,959 Speaker 2: cleaner every year just because he loves vacuuming. 435 00:18:32,969 --> 00:18:34,739 Speaker 1: What do you mean? He buys one vacuum cleaner every year, 436 00:18:34,750 --> 00:18:34,890 Speaker 1: like 437 00:18:34,900 --> 00:18:36,979 Speaker 2: whatever is the newest one, he will buy it because 438 00:18:36,989 --> 00:18:38,300 Speaker 2: he loves cleaning the house 439 00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:41,270 Speaker 2: so much that he will invest in it and, and yeah, 440 00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:44,650 Speaker 2: he just genuinely likes it. So, yeah, beat the statistic. 441 00:18:44,660 --> 00:18:45,530 Speaker 2: Get yourself a burn and 442 00:18:46,609 --> 00:18:52,010 Speaker 1: let's go. Ok. Stronger social connections. This is also one perk. 443 00:18:52,020 --> 00:18:54,979 Speaker 1: So being alone is not the same thing as being lonely. Yeah, 444 00:18:54,989 --> 00:18:57,359 Speaker 1: I really love this phrase. Single people can be more 445 00:18:57,369 --> 00:19:01,750 Speaker 1: conscious of avoiding feelings of isolation and maintaining, stronger, connect 446 00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:03,959 Speaker 1: to friends and family. As a result, you don't want 447 00:19:03,969 --> 00:19:06,339 Speaker 1: to eat alone, for example, maybe then you just show 448 00:19:06,349 --> 00:19:08,389 Speaker 1: your mother out to eat with you or your friends. 449 00:19:08,579 --> 00:19:10,939 Speaker 1: So this is how you build like a stronger social connection, 450 00:19:10,949 --> 00:19:11,890 Speaker 1: as you mentioned. Just now, 451 00:19:11,900 --> 00:19:13,760 Speaker 2: it's like that one Valentine's Day that I told you 452 00:19:13,770 --> 00:19:15,829 Speaker 2: about when I was single, then my parents show me 453 00:19:15,839 --> 00:19:18,859 Speaker 2: out to eat a strong family connection. Yeah. So 454 00:19:18,869 --> 00:19:19,379 Speaker 1: you were, 455 00:19:20,089 --> 00:19:24,670 Speaker 2: yeah, they me but but I have stronger social connection. Yeah, 456 00:19:25,459 --> 00:19:28,969 Speaker 2: you also have less depth. Surprisingly, I feel 457 00:19:28,979 --> 00:19:30,609 Speaker 1: like this is very true in the case of Singapore. 458 00:19:30,619 --> 00:19:31,500 Speaker 2: But that 459 00:19:32,010 --> 00:19:35,619 Speaker 2: if you're, I mean, don't get, get into a relationship 460 00:19:35,630 --> 00:19:38,198 Speaker 2: and then overspend beyond your means and then end up 461 00:19:38,209 --> 00:19:39,020 Speaker 2: in debt, not 462 00:19:39,030 --> 00:19:41,819 Speaker 1: really so much of a relationship, but in terms of marriage. 463 00:19:41,949 --> 00:19:45,569 Speaker 1: So once you get married, you have a house, you 464 00:19:45,579 --> 00:19:48,359 Speaker 1: have mortgage, you have Children. This is, well, 465 00:19:48,430 --> 00:19:50,920 Speaker 1: the cost can really come in. So apart from being 466 00:19:50,930 --> 00:19:53,209 Speaker 1: in a marriage and, er, having kids. Right. I feel 467 00:19:53,219 --> 00:19:56,359 Speaker 1: like couples also tend to spend more money on each other, 468 00:19:56,369 --> 00:20:00,719 Speaker 1: especially when it comes to occasions. Valentine's Day. Anniversaries, birthdays, 469 00:20:00,729 --> 00:20:03,459 Speaker 1: you set up your romantic candlelight dinner, you buy expensive 470 00:20:03,469 --> 00:20:06,060 Speaker 1: gifts for each other, right? Which are things that you 471 00:20:06,069 --> 00:20:07,510 Speaker 1: wouldn't do if you are single. 472 00:20:07,520 --> 00:20:10,140 Speaker 2: That is true. I mean, not necessarily, 473 00:20:10,380 --> 00:20:12,260 Speaker 2: um, that you have to spend so much money when 474 00:20:12,270 --> 00:20:15,349 Speaker 2: you're in a relationship. I think that's just what people 475 00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:17,550 Speaker 2: think is the right thing to do and then they 476 00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:20,229 Speaker 2: end up in debt or they end up, you know, 477 00:20:20,239 --> 00:20:23,119 Speaker 2: being very broke. Yeah, because they spend beyond their means 478 00:20:23,130 --> 00:20:27,439 Speaker 2: in a relationship, about 21% of single people had credit 479 00:20:27,449 --> 00:20:31,719 Speaker 2: card debt compared to 27% of married couples without Children 480 00:20:31,729 --> 00:20:32,369 Speaker 2: who had credit card 481 00:20:32,380 --> 00:20:35,250 Speaker 1: debt. So just last year, a financial advisor told me, 482 00:20:35,260 --> 00:20:37,630 Speaker 1: you know how much it costs to raise a child 483 00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:38,449 Speaker 1: in Singapore, 484 00:20:38,750 --> 00:20:44,449 Speaker 1: $285,000. That's how much it cost maybe from when they 485 00:20:44,459 --> 00:20:46,639 Speaker 1: are young all the way to uni, oh my gosh. Yeah. 486 00:20:46,650 --> 00:20:48,989 Speaker 1: And this is with all the grants that the government 487 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,989 Speaker 1: is giving us. And that is when G S T 488 00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:52,849 Speaker 1: 7%. 489 00:20:52,859 --> 00:20:56,270 Speaker 2: Ok. So plus one more percent. Yeah, like probably $300,000 490 00:20:56,540 --> 00:20:59,718 Speaker 2: to raise a child. Ok. I'm the child. Let me 491 00:20:59,729 --> 00:21:02,250 Speaker 2: raise myself first before I think about that. But that's, 492 00:21:02,260 --> 00:21:05,500 Speaker 2: that's really crazy. So there's a lot of considerations um 493 00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:08,810 Speaker 2: when it comes to thinking about being married, starting a family, 494 00:21:08,819 --> 00:21:11,569 Speaker 2: some people just, there's nothing wrong with, you want to 495 00:21:11,579 --> 00:21:13,459 Speaker 2: go your whole life, just spending money on yourself. What's 496 00:21:13,469 --> 00:21:14,829 Speaker 2: wrong with that? Yeah. But as 497 00:21:14,839 --> 00:21:16,849 Speaker 1: we say that there is still a lot of stigma 498 00:21:16,859 --> 00:21:18,989 Speaker 1: around people who are single, 499 00:21:19,087 --> 00:21:22,927 Speaker 1: are married, especially for women have no idea why they are. So, 500 00:21:22,936 --> 00:21:24,126 Speaker 1: but do you feel that way? I 501 00:21:24,136 --> 00:21:27,016 Speaker 2: know of people that are still single at 35 as in, 502 00:21:27,026 --> 00:21:29,696 Speaker 2: they're not married but they're in committed relationships and then 503 00:21:29,707 --> 00:21:32,136 Speaker 2: people kind of question like why is she still not married? 504 00:21:32,146 --> 00:21:34,927 Speaker 2: Even though she's already in a committed relationship. But if 505 00:21:34,936 --> 00:21:37,737 Speaker 2: a guy is single at 35 they are like, oh, bachelor, bachelor. 506 00:21:37,746 --> 00:21:40,015 Speaker 2: You know what I mean? It's not even a consideration 507 00:21:40,026 --> 00:21:41,035 Speaker 2: for them. How is it so 508 00:21:41,046 --> 00:21:44,495 Speaker 1: unfair? Ok. So I have a friend, her sister is 509 00:21:44,506 --> 00:21:46,296 Speaker 1: in a relationship but both of them 510 00:21:46,413 --> 00:21:49,333 Speaker 1: decided to not get married. So the guy has a 511 00:21:49,343 --> 00:21:53,053 Speaker 1: property of his own and only recently, um, she bought 512 00:21:53,063 --> 00:21:55,563 Speaker 1: a property of her own. It was $3 million. I 513 00:21:55,573 --> 00:21:59,134 Speaker 1: mind you. She paid for the down payment herself. She 514 00:21:59,144 --> 00:22:00,963 Speaker 1: did not get the help of the guy at all. 515 00:22:01,073 --> 00:22:05,293 Speaker 1: That's how established and successful she is, but she does 516 00:22:05,303 --> 00:22:07,353 Speaker 1: not give a damn about getting married. She does not 517 00:22:07,364 --> 00:22:10,293 Speaker 1: want to have kids and thankfully for her, her parents 518 00:22:10,303 --> 00:22:13,183 Speaker 1: are ok with it. So she really does not care 519 00:22:13,193 --> 00:22:13,644 Speaker 1: about what 520 00:22:13,740 --> 00:22:14,770 Speaker 1: society expects of 521 00:22:14,781 --> 00:22:17,400 Speaker 2: her. I love that. Right. You shouldn't, in fact. Yeah, 522 00:22:17,411 --> 00:22:17,720 Speaker 2: but 523 00:22:17,730 --> 00:22:19,350 Speaker 1: honestly how many people can do it, 524 00:22:19,951 --> 00:22:23,961 Speaker 2: I think for some people it's not a choice, for example. 525 00:22:23,970 --> 00:22:26,410 Speaker 2: Um You know, the whole thing about getting a BT 526 00:22:26,421 --> 00:22:28,421 Speaker 2: O right where you have to be married. If not, 527 00:22:28,431 --> 00:22:30,510 Speaker 2: you have to wait till you're 35 apply under like 528 00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:33,469 Speaker 2: the single scheme and stuff. Um And, and at that 529 00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:36,791 Speaker 2: point of time, you're probably left with less alternatives and 530 00:22:36,801 --> 00:22:38,990 Speaker 2: you still need to wait longer for that. Yeah. So 531 00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:40,911 Speaker 2: a lot of these things um 532 00:22:41,410 --> 00:22:45,079 Speaker 2: do come into play when people decide to get married, 533 00:22:45,380 --> 00:22:48,319 Speaker 2: I think it's really out of their hands. 534 00:22:48,329 --> 00:22:52,510 Speaker 1: Correct. Have you heard of the hostel? Like public rental models? 535 00:22:52,520 --> 00:22:53,540 Speaker 2: I actually have not. 536 00:22:53,770 --> 00:22:56,969 Speaker 1: Right. This is what this is relatively new to me 537 00:22:56,979 --> 00:22:59,900 Speaker 1: as well. So basically for singles out there who perhaps, 538 00:22:59,910 --> 00:23:01,859 Speaker 1: you know, don't want to wait till 35 or they can, 539 00:23:01,869 --> 00:23:04,619 Speaker 1: cannot afford an apartment of their own, they can choose 540 00:23:04,630 --> 00:23:05,879 Speaker 1: to get this 541 00:23:05,949 --> 00:23:10,130 Speaker 1: hostel like public rental models. So there's gender floor. So 542 00:23:10,140 --> 00:23:11,770 Speaker 1: like all the men on one floor, all the women 543 00:23:11,780 --> 00:23:15,069 Speaker 1: on one floor and then there are also CCTV, cameras 544 00:23:15,079 --> 00:23:18,390 Speaker 1: placed all over for security purposes. So basically you get 545 00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:21,119 Speaker 1: your own room, you have a single bed, you have 546 00:23:21,130 --> 00:23:24,780 Speaker 1: your wardrobe and stuff like that. But other facilities are shared, 547 00:23:24,790 --> 00:23:27,510 Speaker 1: for example, toilets. So this is why it's like a 548 00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:30,399 Speaker 1: hostel like public rental model. 549 00:23:30,699 --> 00:23:33,260 Speaker 1: So definitely it's a lot cheaper than BT O a 550 00:23:33,469 --> 00:23:36,579 Speaker 1: lot more accessible. But at the same time, you are 551 00:23:36,589 --> 00:23:38,839 Speaker 1: sharing a lot of facilities la like staying 552 00:23:38,849 --> 00:23:42,409 Speaker 2: in a school dorm where you do have some privacy, 553 00:23:42,420 --> 00:23:44,630 Speaker 2: but it's still not fully your own space, correct? 554 00:23:44,640 --> 00:23:47,270 Speaker 1: So people have said that this new single room shared 555 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:50,819 Speaker 1: facilities initiative helps to provide more people with a roof 556 00:23:50,829 --> 00:23:54,010 Speaker 1: over their heads while granting them more privacy except for 557 00:23:54,020 --> 00:23:55,430 Speaker 1: the part where you have to share toilets. Yeah. 558 00:23:55,439 --> 00:23:59,150 Speaker 2: Ok. Do single people or do married people have it 559 00:23:59,160 --> 00:23:59,930 Speaker 2: tougher in Singapore? 560 00:24:00,510 --> 00:24:02,260 Speaker 2: Wow. That's a big question. I 561 00:24:02,270 --> 00:24:06,400 Speaker 1: feel like the overall direction of Singapore is more family centric. 562 00:24:06,550 --> 00:24:09,280 Speaker 1: Like the government is always pushing for, you know, people 563 00:24:09,290 --> 00:24:11,540 Speaker 1: to get married. That's why we have so many policies 564 00:24:11,550 --> 00:24:15,619 Speaker 1: like the BT O, we have so many grants for Children, 565 00:24:15,630 --> 00:24:18,339 Speaker 1: for working adults, you know, who are parents and stuff. 566 00:24:18,420 --> 00:24:22,109 Speaker 1: But that's it. With the rising cost. Singles also actually 567 00:24:22,119 --> 00:24:24,609 Speaker 1: get to save more. Yes, that is true. You have 568 00:24:24,619 --> 00:24:27,880 Speaker 1: less expenses, right? But overall 569 00:24:28,359 --> 00:24:32,410 Speaker 1: I personally feel that singles are still at a disadvantage 570 00:24:32,420 --> 00:24:33,468 Speaker 1: as opposed to married 571 00:24:33,479 --> 00:24:37,119 Speaker 2: couples, married couples. What about, do you think? Unmarried, you know, 572 00:24:37,130 --> 00:24:41,089 Speaker 2: unmarried singles who happen to be mothers? I know that 573 00:24:41,099 --> 00:24:43,560 Speaker 2: a lot of them, um, they are kind of like 574 00:24:43,569 --> 00:24:45,030 Speaker 2: left out of legislation 575 00:24:45,329 --> 00:24:48,579 Speaker 2: because there, there is actually this thing called the Working 576 00:24:48,589 --> 00:24:52,020 Speaker 2: Mothers Child Relief and it was actually, you know, they 577 00:24:52,030 --> 00:24:54,780 Speaker 2: pay you, they give you a sum. It's like a grant, 578 00:24:54,790 --> 00:24:57,859 Speaker 2: a sort of subsidy, subsidy based on your percentage of 579 00:24:57,869 --> 00:24:58,599 Speaker 2: earned income. 580 00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:01,949 Speaker 2: So if you are a working mother and you don't 581 00:25:01,959 --> 00:25:05,139 Speaker 2: earn that much, you get very little subsidy, but they 582 00:25:05,150 --> 00:25:09,130 Speaker 2: have changed it. Yeah. So from 2025 it, instead of 583 00:25:09,140 --> 00:25:11,250 Speaker 2: it being a percentage, it's not a fixed sum. So 584 00:25:11,260 --> 00:25:12,729 Speaker 2: it doesn't matter how much you earn, which I think 585 00:25:12,739 --> 00:25:14,890 Speaker 2: it is way more fair because some people just don't 586 00:25:14,900 --> 00:25:17,439 Speaker 2: have the time to work that much or just don't 587 00:25:17,449 --> 00:25:19,478 Speaker 2: happen to have a job that pays them that much. 588 00:25:19,510 --> 00:25:21,770 Speaker 2: And it's not fair that they receive only a small 589 00:25:21,780 --> 00:25:22,760 Speaker 2: percentage of their 590 00:25:22,770 --> 00:25:25,229 Speaker 1: income. Ok. So now it's no longer a small percentage, 591 00:25:25,239 --> 00:25:26,469 Speaker 1: but a fixed income, fixed sum. 592 00:25:26,550 --> 00:25:28,459 Speaker 1: This is more fair for the lower income 593 00:25:28,469 --> 00:25:31,399 Speaker 2: bracket. Oh, definitely. It's up to $12,000 actually, depending on 594 00:25:31,410 --> 00:25:34,089 Speaker 2: the number of Children that you have. And this is 595 00:25:34,099 --> 00:25:38,379 Speaker 2: only for working mothers who are married, divorced or widowed. 596 00:25:38,390 --> 00:25:41,260 Speaker 1: Ah, ok. In other words, only a woman who has 597 00:25:41,270 --> 00:25:45,040 Speaker 1: her marriage recognized in Singapore and has maintained a child 598 00:25:45,050 --> 00:25:48,339 Speaker 1: who is a Singapore citizen qualifies for this tax relief. 599 00:25:48,349 --> 00:25:48,468 Speaker 1: But 600 00:25:48,479 --> 00:25:50,310 Speaker 2: if you had a child and you were never married, 601 00:25:50,319 --> 00:25:53,489 Speaker 2: never divorced, never widowed, you don't apply for this. You 602 00:25:53,500 --> 00:25:54,099 Speaker 2: get what I mean? 603 00:25:55,109 --> 00:25:57,819 Speaker 2: Yeah. What, what, what's to say that those people don't 604 00:25:57,829 --> 00:26:01,639 Speaker 2: need relief or don't need the subsidy or aid? Yeah. So, 605 00:26:01,650 --> 00:26:02,410 Speaker 2: I do think that 606 00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:05,438 Speaker 2: there are certain, you know, groups of people that we 607 00:26:05,449 --> 00:26:08,030 Speaker 2: are still missing out on that. Yeah, we should take 608 00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:12,270 Speaker 2: a closer look at but overall, yes, you know, being single, um, 609 00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:15,000 Speaker 2: comes with its pros and cons being married, being attached, 610 00:26:15,010 --> 00:26:18,250 Speaker 2: comes with its own, you know, set of, um, struggles 611 00:26:18,260 --> 00:26:21,530 Speaker 2: as well. Um, what matters is that you are happy, 612 00:26:21,540 --> 00:26:24,130 Speaker 1: correct? Yeah. So, was there any point in your life 613 00:26:24,140 --> 00:26:27,399 Speaker 1: where you question if romantic relationships are for you? 614 00:26:27,420 --> 00:26:31,079 Speaker 2: Well, I, I, I like being in a relationship because 615 00:26:31,089 --> 00:26:32,349 Speaker 2: I like, um, 616 00:26:32,859 --> 00:26:35,339 Speaker 2: how do you say I like being there for someone. 617 00:26:35,349 --> 00:26:37,770 Speaker 2: I like doing things for someone. You know, I like, 618 00:26:37,780 --> 00:26:39,780 Speaker 2: I think my love language is like acts of service 619 00:26:39,790 --> 00:26:42,239 Speaker 2: or something. I like, like arranging things for you doing 620 00:26:42,250 --> 00:26:45,170 Speaker 2: things for you. Like, like, you know, if your back hurts, like, 621 00:26:45,180 --> 00:26:47,520 Speaker 2: give you a massage, like things like that acts of service. 622 00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:49,239 Speaker 2: And I feel like it's a bit weird to do 623 00:26:49,250 --> 00:26:51,359 Speaker 2: that with your friends even though yes, you can, but 624 00:26:51,369 --> 00:26:53,189 Speaker 2: you can do that for me. Ok. My back hurt 625 00:26:53,260 --> 00:26:53,609 Speaker 2: very bad, 626 00:26:54,910 --> 00:26:58,329 Speaker 2: impressed. But that's why I like being in a relationship. 627 00:26:58,709 --> 00:27:03,400 Speaker 2: But after being single, I appreciated the fact that I 628 00:27:03,410 --> 00:27:06,290 Speaker 2: learned how to be on my own. And I know 629 00:27:06,300 --> 00:27:09,179 Speaker 2: that if anything happens, touch, I can be on my own, 630 00:27:09,290 --> 00:27:10,400 Speaker 2: which is important. I 631 00:27:10,410 --> 00:27:14,229 Speaker 1: understand for me, I feel like there isn't a point 632 00:27:14,239 --> 00:27:14,739 Speaker 1: in my life 633 00:27:14,811 --> 00:27:17,172 Speaker 1: where I question if romantic relationships are for me. So 634 00:27:17,182 --> 00:27:19,942 Speaker 1: you always thought it was correct? Maybe because I grew 635 00:27:19,953 --> 00:27:23,233 Speaker 1: up in a loving family. You know, my, my, my parents, 636 00:27:23,243 --> 00:27:25,353 Speaker 1: they work very hard to provide for us. And I 637 00:27:25,363 --> 00:27:29,391 Speaker 1: feel like it's nice to have Children to look after you. 638 00:27:29,402 --> 00:27:32,432 Speaker 1: Of course, I'm not expecting my Children to in the future, 639 00:27:32,583 --> 00:27:35,082 Speaker 1: but it's nice to take care of them growing up. 640 00:27:35,156 --> 00:27:38,105 Speaker 1: Watch how cute they are, you know, play with them. 641 00:27:38,115 --> 00:27:41,406 Speaker 1: I enjoy this kind of like genuine quality time with family. 642 00:27:41,426 --> 00:27:42,095 Speaker 1: So that is 643 00:27:42,105 --> 00:27:43,215 Speaker 2: basically your vision for 644 00:27:43,225 --> 00:27:45,514 Speaker 1: life. Correct. I want to get married. I want to 645 00:27:45,526 --> 00:27:49,406 Speaker 1: give birth to 2 to 3 cute babies waiting 646 00:27:49,416 --> 00:27:52,965 Speaker 2: for your babies. Wow. Um Some of our listeners actually 647 00:27:52,975 --> 00:27:55,406 Speaker 2: said that singlehood is not for them. 648 00:27:55,910 --> 00:28:00,560 Speaker 2: Um Because http S dot Says I can't be by 649 00:28:00,569 --> 00:28:03,010 Speaker 2: myself for a long period of time. I need someone 650 00:28:03,020 --> 00:28:07,500 Speaker 2: to hold and to call mine to curate. Yeah. Ryan 651 00:28:07,510 --> 00:28:11,379 Speaker 2: actually says I frequently have thoughts of building a future 652 00:28:11,390 --> 00:28:14,819 Speaker 2: with a partner. So therefore singlehood is not for me, 653 00:28:14,939 --> 00:28:17,780 Speaker 2: even if they haven't found the one at the time, 654 00:28:18,030 --> 00:28:19,790 Speaker 2: they are confident that they will find the one to 655 00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:21,069 Speaker 2: build a future with. Correct, 656 00:28:21,079 --> 00:28:21,829 Speaker 1: they know where they're 657 00:28:21,839 --> 00:28:26,300 Speaker 2: going. Correct. Random circle says when I see couples happy, 658 00:28:26,310 --> 00:28:29,938 Speaker 2: it makes me feel kind of lonely and sad. So, 659 00:28:29,949 --> 00:28:32,879 Speaker 2: I mean that I, I get, I get that, you know, sometimes, like, 660 00:28:32,890 --> 00:28:33,699 Speaker 2: especially 661 00:28:34,109 --> 00:28:37,650 Speaker 2: when it's a big romantic occasion, things like Valentine's Day 662 00:28:37,660 --> 00:28:40,310 Speaker 2: when you're single, er, just don't go out because you 663 00:28:40,319 --> 00:28:44,489 Speaker 2: see things that may upset you. Yeah, especially 664 00:28:44,500 --> 00:28:47,189 Speaker 1: if you're single. Right. Yeah, absolutely. But like I mentioned 665 00:28:47,199 --> 00:28:50,199 Speaker 1: just now, being alone doesn't mean that you are lonely, 666 00:28:50,209 --> 00:28:53,380 Speaker 2: even though you're alone as in single, you have a 667 00:28:53,390 --> 00:28:56,930 Speaker 2: great support group of family, friends, people around that are 668 00:28:56,939 --> 00:28:58,130 Speaker 2: never going to change. 669 00:28:58,295 --> 00:29:00,905 Speaker 2: But you can also be alone and lonely as in, 670 00:29:00,915 --> 00:29:03,155 Speaker 2: you're single and you decide to isolate yourself from the world. 671 00:29:03,165 --> 00:29:05,375 Speaker 2: So if you find yourself doing that. Maybe it's time 672 00:29:05,385 --> 00:29:06,275 Speaker 2: to come out of your shell a 673 00:29:06,285 --> 00:29:08,535 Speaker 1: bit more because you know what social scientists have found 674 00:29:08,545 --> 00:29:11,734 Speaker 1: that those who do live alone tend to be actively 675 00:29:11,744 --> 00:29:14,795 Speaker 1: involved in the lives of their cities and neighborhoods. So 676 00:29:14,805 --> 00:29:16,755 Speaker 1: they're not just staying home. They actually walk out the 677 00:29:16,765 --> 00:29:19,905 Speaker 1: door and meet other people, talk to their neighbors, you know, 678 00:29:19,915 --> 00:29:22,244 Speaker 1: join some communities, talk to the plants. 679 00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:25,459 Speaker 1: I have neighbors who do that, talk to the plant, 680 00:29:25,469 --> 00:29:27,660 Speaker 1: not talk to the plants, but they really turn the 681 00:29:27,670 --> 00:29:30,530 Speaker 1: whole corridor into like a garden. Ok. And 682 00:29:30,660 --> 00:29:32,560 Speaker 2: as in it's a community garden kind of 683 00:29:32,589 --> 00:29:35,010 Speaker 1: thing. So he has one garden of his own and 684 00:29:35,020 --> 00:29:37,390 Speaker 1: then he joined the community garden downstairs. Ok. So he 685 00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:39,949 Speaker 1: has two gardens and it is like new topic, right? 686 00:29:39,959 --> 00:29:42,479 Speaker 1: People who come together, the uncles and aunties, 687 00:29:42,959 --> 00:29:45,229 Speaker 1: like, you know, talking about the plants that they, they, 688 00:29:45,239 --> 00:29:47,530 Speaker 1: they grow together and they're so cute. Honestly, I 689 00:29:47,540 --> 00:29:50,630 Speaker 2: do think being single forces you out of your shell 690 00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:53,280 Speaker 2: a bit more a bit because I mean, if you're 691 00:29:53,290 --> 00:29:55,199 Speaker 2: going to just sit at home. Not really. Right. So 692 00:29:55,209 --> 00:29:57,060 Speaker 2: you go out and you try and meet people, you 693 00:29:57,069 --> 00:30:01,459 Speaker 2: try and yeah, I guess and plant next door and 694 00:30:01,469 --> 00:30:02,130 Speaker 2: stuff like that. 695 00:30:02,989 --> 00:30:05,510 Speaker 1: Ok. So with that, if you are listening to us 696 00:30:05,520 --> 00:30:08,079 Speaker 1: and if you are single but ready to mingle, I 697 00:30:08,089 --> 00:30:09,880 Speaker 1: have the best plan 698 00:30:09,890 --> 00:30:11,760 Speaker 2: for you. Yes, that's right. Um You might have heard 699 00:30:11,770 --> 00:30:16,369 Speaker 2: about Clarity Series. It's called Matched. OK. And that is 700 00:30:16,380 --> 00:30:19,920 Speaker 2: where they try and find you somebody. It's like Love Island. 701 00:30:19,930 --> 00:30:20,540 Speaker 2: But yeah, 702 00:30:21,339 --> 00:30:23,089 Speaker 2: but not so brutal. OK. 703 00:30:23,099 --> 00:30:25,770 Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And our team actually takes effort to 704 00:30:25,780 --> 00:30:27,719 Speaker 1: find out what kind of a person you are and 705 00:30:27,729 --> 00:30:30,010 Speaker 1: what kind of a person would actually suit 706 00:30:30,020 --> 00:30:33,810 Speaker 2: you. Yes. So Clarity Match is what you can consider, 707 00:30:33,819 --> 00:30:36,770 Speaker 2: you know, joining if you are ready to mingle anything, 708 00:30:36,780 --> 00:30:38,800 Speaker 2: you got like a great personality. Yeah, 709 00:30:39,239 --> 00:30:41,859 Speaker 1: ok. We'll put the link in the description box so 710 00:30:41,869 --> 00:30:44,099 Speaker 1: you can just click on it any time you consider. Ok. 711 00:30:44,109 --> 00:30:46,890 Speaker 2: So I think, you know, just a final word. 712 00:30:47,115 --> 00:30:49,286 Speaker 2: We we always say this and it's a running theme, right? 713 00:30:49,296 --> 00:30:52,395 Speaker 2: It's just be happy whether you're single, you're not single. 714 00:30:52,605 --> 00:30:56,485 Speaker 2: Don't let other people's expectations of how you should live 715 00:30:56,495 --> 00:30:59,816 Speaker 2: your life, make you be unhappy, right? If you are 716 00:30:59,826 --> 00:31:03,526 Speaker 2: happier being by yourself and you know, you feel more 717 00:31:03,536 --> 00:31:06,026 Speaker 2: fulfilled that way. I think just trust your heart, 718 00:31:06,036 --> 00:31:09,526 Speaker 1: correct? I want to quote our PDF again, a romantic 719 00:31:09,536 --> 00:31:13,026 Speaker 1: relationship is a luxury, but it's not a necessity. 720 00:31:13,232 --> 00:31:15,491 Speaker 1: So with that in mind, I hope you find your 721 00:31:15,501 --> 00:31:16,011 Speaker 1: happiness one 722 00:31:16,021 --> 00:31:17,761 Speaker 2: day. Yeah. Expensive luxury. Yeah. 723 00:31:17,771 --> 00:31:21,171 Speaker 1: Expensive luxury, good. Alright. Thank you so much for tuning 724 00:31:21,182 --> 00:31:25,041 Speaker 1: in to this episode of Clav Hash podcast. I'm Hazel. 725 00:31:25,052 --> 00:31:27,732 Speaker 1: I'm don't forget to follow us on Instagram at its 726 00:31:27,761 --> 00:31:29,041 Speaker 1: Clav dot com and you can 727 00:31:29,052 --> 00:31:31,562 Speaker 2: listen to us on Spotify Apple Podcast me, listen and 728 00:31:31,572 --> 00:31:34,291 Speaker 2: we're on youtube as well and turn on the notification 729 00:31:34,352 --> 00:31:36,082 Speaker 2: to know when a new episode is out. 730 00:31:36,092 --> 00:31:39,021 Speaker 1: Thanks again guys. We'll see you next time with Azura. Bye.