1 00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:24,200 Speaker 1: Welcome to Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Here thousands of 2 00:00:24,240 --> 00:00:27,880 Speaker 1: hours of Dennis's lectures courses in classic radio programs. Had 3 00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:39,720 Speaker 1: to purchase Dennis Prager's Rational Bibles. Go to Dennispreger dot com. 4 00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:43,280 Speaker 2: I'm old fashioned. I like two taxes. I don't know. 5 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:44,800 Speaker 3: I think all of a sudden, I don't like being 6 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:46,440 Speaker 3: married to what is known as a new woman. 7 00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:50,280 Speaker 2: I want a wife, not a competitor, competator, competitor. Talk 8 00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:52,639 Speaker 2: about a bit, this crying in the morning thing. 9 00:00:52,640 --> 00:00:55,120 Speaker 1: It's depression, you know, Let's get that fixed. That's what 10 00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:58,120 Speaker 1: men think, isn't it What Unless you've got the answer, 11 00:00:58,200 --> 00:01:00,680 Speaker 1: unless you can say, oh, I know this bloke and 12 00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:03,920 Speaker 1: the X road to fix that, and there's no point bothering. 13 00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:05,880 Speaker 2: How do you write women so well? 14 00:01:06,800 --> 00:01:09,920 Speaker 4: I think of a man and I take away reason 15 00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:11,200 Speaker 4: and accountability. 16 00:01:11,759 --> 00:01:14,039 Speaker 2: I love him, I love him and I don't care 17 00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:14,679 Speaker 2: what you think. 18 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:17,920 Speaker 3: I love him for the for the man he wants 19 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:20,119 Speaker 3: to be, and I love him for the man that 20 00:01:20,240 --> 00:01:21,720 Speaker 3: he almost is. 21 00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:23,840 Speaker 5: What do people have rowse about him? 22 00:01:24,520 --> 00:01:31,240 Speaker 2: Money? Sex, sex, money he wants, she doesn't want, she wants, 23 00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:32,800 Speaker 2: he doesn't want women. 24 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:37,600 Speaker 6: I've always been a big problem to me, doctor fusbend. 25 00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:42,200 Speaker 5: Hey listening, Yes, yes, yes, go, I'm gone. 26 00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:45,600 Speaker 2: All right, everybody, Welcome to the Male Female Hour on 27 00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:49,360 Speaker 2: the Dennis Prager Show, a truly honest look at men 28 00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:54,200 Speaker 2: and women every week this hour, second hour of my 29 00:01:54,360 --> 00:02:01,960 Speaker 2: three hour show Wednesdays. And I persist in the hour 30 00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:05,800 Speaker 2: because of the tremendous feedback that I receive from you 31 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:08,079 Speaker 2: an email and what you tell me when I come 32 00:02:08,120 --> 00:02:13,040 Speaker 2: to speak in your various cities. I wish I could 33 00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:15,960 Speaker 2: just video all the couples who have come over, or 34 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:19,160 Speaker 2: one member of a couple to say that it has 35 00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:24,400 Speaker 2: save their marriage or tremendously help their marriage. And that's 36 00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:31,760 Speaker 2: what gives me tremendous comfort and encouragement. And it's because 37 00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:35,680 Speaker 2: that's my agenda. My a gena is clarity and the 38 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:40,320 Speaker 2: belief that clarity is our friend, not our enemy. And 39 00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:45,480 Speaker 2: oftentimes they are very difficult subjects. That will be the 40 00:02:45,520 --> 00:02:50,080 Speaker 2: case this hour. A difficult subject. I should also mention 41 00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:57,280 Speaker 2: in advance that although it's perfectly appropriate for teenagers, perhaps 42 00:02:57,520 --> 00:03:00,400 Speaker 2: perhaps and I'm not even certain, I guess it's not 43 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,960 Speaker 2: a subject that you'd want a ten year old necessarily 44 00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:05,560 Speaker 2: or an eight year old to hear many of my 45 00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:09,359 Speaker 2: shows are listened to by kids, and I am delighted 46 00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:13,040 Speaker 2: by that fact. But this is one of those hours 47 00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:19,560 Speaker 2: that perhaps you might think second time about that, And 48 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:24,280 Speaker 2: it is in part a revisiting of something that I 49 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:31,600 Speaker 2: know has been eye opening to many women. As as 50 00:03:33,720 --> 00:03:37,480 Speaker 2: would would be expected, there are things about men and 51 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:41,720 Speaker 2: their sexual nature, for example, that a woman can't into it. 52 00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:47,440 Speaker 2: It's it's it's too foreign, it's too different. But this 53 00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:53,760 Speaker 2: one is when it is perceived by by a woman 54 00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 2: who loves her man and is perceived for the first 55 00:03:59,560 --> 00:04:03,880 Speaker 2: time or or much clearer than before, is life changing. 56 00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:11,600 Speaker 2: And that is an almost counter intuitive understanding of the 57 00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:18,640 Speaker 2: role that sex plays in a husband's life. See. On 58 00:04:18,680 --> 00:04:23,479 Speaker 2: the one hand, male sexual nature can easily and in 59 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:30,880 Speaker 2: fact is almost designed to simply have sexual relations without 60 00:04:30,919 --> 00:04:36,400 Speaker 2: necessarily any commitment. Uh. The the the male libido is 61 00:04:36,720 --> 00:04:44,240 Speaker 2: is churning, is running, and attractive women and that's all 62 00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:49,040 Speaker 2: that's necessary to consummate that act. That is, that is 63 00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:53,640 Speaker 2: male sexual nature in a nutshell. Yet at the same time, 64 00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:57,880 Speaker 2: and this is this is almost as I say, it's 65 00:04:57,880 --> 00:05:02,800 Speaker 2: not only counterintuitive, it's also almost the opposite of what 66 00:05:02,839 --> 00:05:07,719 Speaker 2: I have just said. Alongside that ability which exists in 67 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:11,680 Speaker 2: men more than in women, to go from from sexual 68 00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:14,919 Speaker 2: relation to sexual relation to sexual relation and not have 69 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:20,840 Speaker 2: any emotional commitment involved, and not even and enjoy it 70 00:05:20,880 --> 00:05:27,840 Speaker 2: without any emotional commitment. Aside from that, the opposite, it 71 00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:30,719 Speaker 2: seems to be true when it comes to the woman 72 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:33,800 Speaker 2: that a man chooses to live with the rest of 73 00:05:33,839 --> 00:05:39,760 Speaker 2: his life i e. Marries and that is that, while 74 00:05:41,279 --> 00:05:46,440 Speaker 2: whatever it was said about his nature is true, her 75 00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:52,719 Speaker 2: having relations with him is one of the most powerful ways, 76 00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:57,120 Speaker 2: if not the most powerful, for many men, for most men, 77 00:05:57,480 --> 00:06:01,600 Speaker 2: to know that she loves him, or to put it 78 00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:06,440 Speaker 2: more powerfully, because it's more it's more clear, perhaps in 79 00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:10,600 Speaker 2: the negative, if he doesn't have sex with his wife, 80 00:06:11,160 --> 00:06:16,640 Speaker 2: he does not believe she loves him, that is, and 81 00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:19,280 Speaker 2: that is not true the other way around. I mean, 82 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,800 Speaker 2: it is, of course true the other way around. In 83 00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:24,800 Speaker 2: a literal sense. If a man never makes love to 84 00:06:24,839 --> 00:06:27,320 Speaker 2: his wife, then she wonders if he loves her. Of course, 85 00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:31,679 Speaker 2: that's obvious, of course, but there's a big difference between 86 00:06:31,720 --> 00:06:38,720 Speaker 2: never and rarely, and the man denied sex believes that 87 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:42,080 Speaker 2: she does not love him and gets angry and then 88 00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:48,160 Speaker 2: closes down because he can't express his anger because he's 89 00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:52,600 Speaker 2: afraid to. Will he seem to demanding? Does he seem 90 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:56,000 Speaker 2: like an animal? Does he seem perverted? Does he seem 91 00:06:56,240 --> 00:07:02,359 Speaker 2: hyper sex? And also it's demeaning for a man. A 92 00:07:02,440 --> 00:07:06,640 Speaker 2: man doesn't want to beg his wife for sex, even 93 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:11,360 Speaker 2: asking for it. He is, he feels so often to me, 94 00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:16,239 Speaker 2: these are not things that are intuitive to a woman. 95 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:20,640 Speaker 2: You want to care one is not blaming women for 96 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:23,680 Speaker 2: not knowing this. There's no way unless they're told. But 97 00:07:24,280 --> 00:07:29,280 Speaker 2: once told, it's not deniable. The number of men walking 98 00:07:29,320 --> 00:07:33,680 Speaker 2: around feeling unloved, even if the wife is a good 99 00:07:33,760 --> 00:07:38,840 Speaker 2: mother and and and you know, kind in other ways, 100 00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:41,960 Speaker 2: and that's all important. Of course, these are all important things, 101 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:47,000 Speaker 2: but this part of a marriage can chatter virtually everything. 102 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:52,880 Speaker 2: And if your husband has clammed up, if he has 103 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:58,080 Speaker 2: become unexpressive, Now, if he was never expressive, this may 104 00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:02,120 Speaker 2: not hold. But if he has become far less expressive, 105 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:08,360 Speaker 2: more more closed, more into himself, it is hard for 106 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:14,080 Speaker 2: me to imagine that his sexual needs are being met. 107 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:16,960 Speaker 2: If they are and he's closed, then there are other 108 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:23,720 Speaker 2: factors that's obvious. This is often a sort of revelation 109 00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:30,280 Speaker 2: to a wife the significance emotionally of sex psychologically, not 110 00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:37,679 Speaker 2: just physically. See, women will understandably, wives will understandably think, oh, 111 00:08:37,760 --> 00:08:40,199 Speaker 2: my husband, you know, has a he wants it more 112 00:08:40,240 --> 00:08:42,480 Speaker 2: than I do. That's that's the stereotype. And it's a 113 00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:46,760 Speaker 2: stereotype because it's true most most men want it more 114 00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:51,640 Speaker 2: often than their wives do. That's correct. But if it's 115 00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:56,880 Speaker 2: just dismissed as that, and it is infrequent, now, infrequent 116 00:08:57,000 --> 00:09:00,760 Speaker 2: is a very subjective term. I fully acknowledge that, and 117 00:09:00,920 --> 00:09:03,800 Speaker 2: I will take I will truly go out on a 118 00:09:03,840 --> 00:09:08,319 Speaker 2: limb and offer a number a guideline that might even 119 00:09:09,080 --> 00:09:13,480 Speaker 2: determine what is too infrequent. And here I think a 120 00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:15,959 Speaker 2: man and a woman can reach some sort of compromise. 121 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:20,040 Speaker 2: But putting that aside till later, some somebody should ask 122 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:22,840 Speaker 2: me about it, and I'll give you a thought on it. 123 00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:29,079 Speaker 2: But where it is infrequent, he does not feel loved, 124 00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:34,079 Speaker 2: Then he gets then he gets demanding, then he stops demanding, 125 00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:39,800 Speaker 2: then he gets angry, and then he gets silent. That's 126 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,040 Speaker 2: that's the way it works. In other words, men see 127 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:48,200 Speaker 2: a woman's desire to please him physically as a major 128 00:09:48,280 --> 00:09:53,080 Speaker 2: statement of her love for him. This is not something 129 00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:59,080 Speaker 2: that is told to women when they marry. This is 130 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:01,720 Speaker 2: how This is one of the major ways he will 131 00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:08,200 Speaker 2: know you love him, by your availability in the physical realm, 132 00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:11,760 Speaker 2: your desire, and indeed compounded with if you want to, 133 00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:13,720 Speaker 2: if you take care of of the way you look, 134 00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:17,040 Speaker 2: these are gifts to him. Now, if he's unworthy of that, 135 00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:20,720 Speaker 2: then I have nothing to say. I'm talking about a 136 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:23,520 Speaker 2: husband you love. I'm not talking about a husband you 137 00:10:23,559 --> 00:10:26,880 Speaker 2: have contempt for, or a husband you dislike, or a 138 00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:34,120 Speaker 2: husband that who is you have both decided to become roommates. 139 00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:38,959 Speaker 2: But if you love your husband, this is a There 140 00:10:39,040 --> 00:10:43,120 Speaker 2: is no way like this to show that you love him, 141 00:10:43,679 --> 00:10:45,800 Speaker 2: believe it or not. And there are many ways to 142 00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:47,439 Speaker 2: show you love him, as he has many ways to 143 00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:50,040 Speaker 2: show he loves you. And we have discussed that, and 144 00:10:50,080 --> 00:10:51,839 Speaker 2: I will return to that too, because he has to 145 00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:54,040 Speaker 2: show he loves you just as much as you have 146 00:10:54,080 --> 00:10:58,160 Speaker 2: to show that you love him. One eight prager seven 147 00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:00,920 Speaker 2: seven six one eight p R A g E R 148 00:11:01,040 --> 00:11:04,559 Speaker 2: seven seven six, which is eight seven seven two four 149 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:08,760 Speaker 2: three triple seven six. I would I invite your calls. 150 00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:18,800 Speaker 1: This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this. 151 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:28,120 Speaker 1: Now back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom. 152 00:11:28,760 --> 00:11:31,400 Speaker 2: This is the Male Female Hour on the Dennis Prager Show. 153 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:36,800 Speaker 2: I'm Dennis Prager. Every week this hour is devoted they're 154 00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:40,440 Speaker 2: subjects about men and women. I return to perhaps the 155 00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:45,080 Speaker 2: most sensitive and almost never discussed one, because it's so 156 00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:48,360 Speaker 2: easily made fun of, It's so easily ridiculed, which is 157 00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:50,400 Speaker 2: part of the reason men don't talk to their wives 158 00:11:50,440 --> 00:11:55,479 Speaker 2: about it, because they feel so easily ridiculed and diminished 159 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:59,959 Speaker 2: by it. I am doing a service here for the 160 00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:03,600 Speaker 2: many men who won't speak to their wives about this 161 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:07,880 Speaker 2: out of out of embarrassment and needs. But yet it needs, 162 00:12:07,920 --> 00:12:13,959 Speaker 2: it needs to be addressed. And that is what infrequent 163 00:12:14,120 --> 00:12:17,840 Speaker 2: sex means to most husbands. It means they are not loved. 164 00:12:19,440 --> 00:12:25,800 Speaker 2: And it's counterintuitive, as I said, because men can so 165 00:12:26,440 --> 00:12:32,320 Speaker 2: easily separate sex and love, so then a woman might think, well, 166 00:12:32,320 --> 00:12:34,600 Speaker 2: why would they then associate them if he can so 167 00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:39,360 Speaker 2: easily dissociate them? And so it is. I admit that 168 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:45,640 Speaker 2: it's complex, but its complexity does not deny its reality. This, 169 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:51,800 Speaker 2: my dear dear wives, is how first and foremost certainly 170 00:12:52,120 --> 00:12:55,800 Speaker 2: in for much of the marriage. I mean, I guess 171 00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:59,160 Speaker 2: there is a certain point in a marriage where where 172 00:12:59,280 --> 00:13:05,320 Speaker 2: that that tapers off naturally for both sexes. And I'm 173 00:13:05,320 --> 00:13:08,720 Speaker 2: not addressing that, but for the great majority of marriages 174 00:13:08,720 --> 00:13:13,200 Speaker 2: and the great majority of years, this is first and 175 00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:16,040 Speaker 2: foremost how a woman says to her husband, I love you. 176 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:21,040 Speaker 2: Many ways a man says, and we and we have 177 00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:23,640 Speaker 2: covered them, and we will cover them. But let me 178 00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:26,120 Speaker 2: do this one. And if you are a man who 179 00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:32,560 Speaker 2: who identifies with this issue, call so that so that 180 00:13:32,679 --> 00:13:37,199 Speaker 2: people can hear you. One eight Prager seven seven six 181 00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:43,080 Speaker 2: eight seven seven two four three triple seven six And 182 00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:47,280 Speaker 2: let's go to Nathan in Maple Grove, Minnesota. Hello Nathan 183 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:49,480 Speaker 2: Dennis Prager. Hey Dennis, Hi. 184 00:13:50,559 --> 00:13:53,000 Speaker 4: One of your last comments, you had said that you 185 00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:55,719 Speaker 4: feel that men need to feel loved just as much 186 00:13:55,720 --> 00:14:00,040 Speaker 4: as women need to feel loved. Correct, well, of course, okay, 187 00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:03,839 Speaker 4: Well I disagree with that. I think that respect is 188 00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:05,000 Speaker 4: an incidently more. 189 00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:08,040 Speaker 2: Oh, I see what you mean. Okay, that's fair in 190 00:14:08,120 --> 00:14:09,959 Speaker 2: the words, women want to be loved, men want to 191 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,199 Speaker 2: be respected. 192 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:13,120 Speaker 4: Well, And it's also command in the Bible. I know 193 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:16,160 Speaker 4: this is you know, this is biblically based that God 194 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:19,480 Speaker 4: commands or was it Jesus. I'm sorry, I can't remember moment. 195 00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:22,600 Speaker 4: But there is a command in the Bible for women 196 00:14:22,680 --> 00:14:26,120 Speaker 4: to respect their husbands because they already love naturally. And 197 00:14:26,160 --> 00:14:28,840 Speaker 4: there is a command for men to love their wives 198 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:32,400 Speaker 4: because they already respect naturally. They don't love naturally. They 199 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:34,320 Speaker 4: have to learn how to do it, just as much 200 00:14:34,320 --> 00:14:37,680 Speaker 4: as women have to learn, you know, how to respect men. 201 00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:40,840 Speaker 4: And I think that that's infinitely bigger of an issue, 202 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:43,760 Speaker 4: because when a woman feels that she has not loved, 203 00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:46,720 Speaker 4: she acts in a disrespecting way, and when a man 204 00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:50,280 Speaker 4: feels disrespected, he acts unlovingly. 205 00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,600 Speaker 2: All Right, you're adding, all right, fine, you're adding yet 206 00:14:52,640 --> 00:14:58,480 Speaker 2: another layer to what is already complex. I am not 207 00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:03,320 Speaker 2: delving into why it has happened in a marriage. There 208 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:06,600 Speaker 2: may be a hundred reasons. I am merely describing a 209 00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:12,200 Speaker 2: fact that too rarely is openly acknowledged the role of 210 00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:18,120 Speaker 2: her sexual availability to his believing that she loves him. 211 00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:22,400 Speaker 2: If you will respects him, that's fine. That's fine too, 212 00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:29,120 Speaker 2: because because he feels demeaned and diminished to go begging 213 00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:34,680 Speaker 2: for it and then stops and then clams up, it's 214 00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:38,040 Speaker 2: a very it's a complex institution marriage. If it were not, 215 00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:42,000 Speaker 2: then vast numbers would would not be in trouble. Remember 216 00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:45,680 Speaker 2: if about half of the of marriages divorce, and I 217 00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:48,640 Speaker 2: know the debate, well, it's not really fifty percent. It's really, 218 00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:53,040 Speaker 2: for all intents and purposes, it's about half. And if 219 00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:57,000 Speaker 2: it's forty percent, fine, I have no vested interest in 220 00:15:57,000 --> 00:16:00,560 Speaker 2: the number. It's a vast number. My only point is 221 00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:05,240 Speaker 2: that for everyone who isn't divorcing, it's hardly a wonderful marriage. 222 00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:08,680 Speaker 2: We're talking about the divorces, but that doesn't mean that 223 00:16:08,720 --> 00:16:13,160 Speaker 2: every non divorcing couple is having a good relationship. So 224 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:18,560 Speaker 2: clearly the majority of marriages are troubled, and so we 225 00:16:18,640 --> 00:16:23,240 Speaker 2: need to understand and be adult in our recognizing the 226 00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:29,520 Speaker 2: complexity of it working. And one of those things is 227 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:32,000 Speaker 2: what I am describing today. It is hardly the only 228 00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:35,240 Speaker 2: component of marriage, but it is an indispensable one for 229 00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:38,600 Speaker 2: the vast majority of marriages. And this is how a 230 00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:47,240 Speaker 2: man interprets the unavailability of his wife. Okay, let's go 231 00:16:47,360 --> 00:16:50,880 Speaker 2: to Keith in Tampa, Florida, Keith Dennis Prager The Male 232 00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:51,600 Speaker 2: Female Hour. 233 00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:55,840 Speaker 5: Hi, Hey, Dennis, you nailed it right on the head. 234 00:16:55,920 --> 00:17:00,360 Speaker 5: Concerning women are not told these things in marriage are 235 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:03,600 Speaker 5: before they're married. I was married to a woman for 236 00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:07,920 Speaker 5: twenty years and our marriage ended up disastrously in a 237 00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:12,719 Speaker 5: divorce for exactly the same reasons that you described. She 238 00:17:13,360 --> 00:17:17,040 Speaker 5: no longer considered sex important in the marriage, and I 239 00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:20,800 Speaker 5: felt exactly like you said, slow drifting away, and eventually 240 00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:21,640 Speaker 5: I clammed up. 241 00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:28,919 Speaker 2: Well, I I thank you for saying what millions of 242 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:38,120 Speaker 2: men are thinking. That's right. Now, here's an irony. This 243 00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:46,000 Speaker 2: was known I much more generations ago. But with the 244 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:55,960 Speaker 2: the advent of widespread university education, people have been taught 245 00:17:56,000 --> 00:18:00,879 Speaker 2: the opposite of reality. And so this The better the 246 00:18:01,119 --> 00:18:04,800 Speaker 2: educated the person in the in the liberal arts, the 247 00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:07,800 Speaker 2: less likely they are to believe this. I know this 248 00:18:07,840 --> 00:18:11,160 Speaker 2: because when I wrote about this last year in some columns, 249 00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:15,800 Speaker 2: the ridicule and the venom spewed at me on the 250 00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:21,200 Speaker 2: internet from feminist websites on on on how much better 251 00:18:21,240 --> 00:18:24,159 Speaker 2: it is if a woman who loves her husband. I 252 00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:26,760 Speaker 2: kept saying that, if he's worthy of your respect and love, 253 00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:30,359 Speaker 2: how important it is to him to to to have sex. 254 00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:36,880 Speaker 2: I was attacked for advocating marital rape. You can check 255 00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:41,200 Speaker 2: it out on the internet. How is that possible? How 256 00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:46,240 Speaker 2: can what I'm saying be uh be even close to 257 00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:51,119 Speaker 2: such an obscenity. Well, the answer, the answer was, well, 258 00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:54,359 Speaker 2: he's putting emotional pressure on women to have sex with 259 00:18:54,400 --> 00:19:00,240 Speaker 2: their husbands. That's now considered marital rape. That a man 260 00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:03,960 Speaker 2: wrote an article saying that it is better for a marriage, if, if, if, you, 261 00:19:04,119 --> 00:19:07,240 Speaker 2: even if you're not in the mood often to have 262 00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:13,680 Speaker 2: sex with your husband. All right, anyway, Uh, I am 263 00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:17,800 Speaker 2: more interested in telling the truth than in being loved. 264 00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:20,880 Speaker 2: And it's a it's a very liberating way to live 265 00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:25,520 Speaker 2: a life. This is uh a subject that needs to 266 00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:30,000 Speaker 2: be said. Somebody ought to do this in premarital counseling, 267 00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:34,080 Speaker 2: and I'll bet it is done. Uh. Primaral counseling is 268 00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:38,080 Speaker 2: probably a great idea. It may forestall a lot of divorce. 269 00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:41,760 Speaker 2: One eight Praguer seven seven six The Male Female Hour 270 00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:42,960 Speaker 2: of The Dennis Prager Show. 271 00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:53,760 Speaker 1: This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this. 272 00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:12,080 Speaker 1: Now back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom. 273 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:16,119 Speaker 5: To be looking at me, It's. 274 00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:16,720 Speaker 2: Always the same. 275 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:17,800 Speaker 6: It's justice. 276 00:20:18,240 --> 00:20:21,240 Speaker 2: Hi, everybody, welcome back The Male Female Hour on the 277 00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:30,360 Speaker 2: Dennis Prager Show. Very sensitive and often marriage saving subject 278 00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:34,240 Speaker 2: if in fact people, and in this case, to be honest, 279 00:20:34,359 --> 00:20:38,159 Speaker 2: if wives are prepared to hear it. Just to make 280 00:20:38,240 --> 00:20:41,840 Speaker 2: it clear again, if your husband is unworthy of your love, 281 00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:45,080 Speaker 2: then this is all academic. It's the point is moot, 282 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:48,920 Speaker 2: and you might as well be a humming mozart or 283 00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:53,520 Speaker 2: or whatever you prefer to hum at any given time. 284 00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:56,840 Speaker 2: But if your husband is a decent man, a good man, 285 00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:58,960 Speaker 2: worthy of your love, and you want to have a 286 00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:02,320 Speaker 2: good marriage, not just one that lasts because they're often 287 00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:07,320 Speaker 2: not related, those two, those two facts, then this is 288 00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:10,080 Speaker 2: critically important to know, just as there are things that 289 00:21:10,119 --> 00:21:13,320 Speaker 2: a man needs to know that are critically important about 290 00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:17,280 Speaker 2: love and marriage, and that is the importance of sex 291 00:21:17,520 --> 00:21:22,199 Speaker 2: to him emotionally. It is often dismissed as just a 292 00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:25,880 Speaker 2: physical urge, and by golly, just as people overcome physical 293 00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,480 Speaker 2: urges to one hundred other things, they can overcome the 294 00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:33,560 Speaker 2: physical urge to sex. But in a marriage, he has 295 00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:41,680 Speaker 2: given up his natural instinct, which is polygamous, to have 296 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:44,159 Speaker 2: many women. He has given that part of him, of 297 00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:47,119 Speaker 2: his male nature up. Why do men often get scared 298 00:21:47,160 --> 00:21:51,240 Speaker 2: before marriage? It's over that, not over the woman. It's 299 00:21:51,280 --> 00:21:58,640 Speaker 2: over that, and has given over to her that staggering 300 00:21:58,760 --> 00:22:06,440 Speaker 2: power of his being able to meet a God given 301 00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:12,400 Speaker 2: or nature given deep need. And if it is not fulfilled, 302 00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:16,439 Speaker 2: and it's never perfectly fulfilled, it's men. You need to 303 00:22:16,520 --> 00:22:20,200 Speaker 2: know this. It's just you're not made to be perfectly 304 00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:23,600 Speaker 2: satisfied in this way. Hugh Hefner is not perfectly satisfied, 305 00:22:24,720 --> 00:22:26,480 Speaker 2: or if he is, that's the type of life you 306 00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:29,439 Speaker 2: would have to lead in order to be perfectly satisfied 307 00:22:29,440 --> 00:22:31,639 Speaker 2: in that arena. But of course it's a life of 308 00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:36,120 Speaker 2: such staggering superficiality that you might shoot yourself out of boredom. 309 00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:41,439 Speaker 2: But that's a separate issue somewhat. But the power of 310 00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:46,960 Speaker 2: the woman in this regard is critical and it's often 311 00:22:46,960 --> 00:22:49,959 Speaker 2: a make or break issue in a relationship. Let's go 312 00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:53,080 Speaker 2: to Parker, Colorado and Debbie. Hello, Debbie, Dennis Prager. 313 00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,000 Speaker 6: Hi, Dennis, Hi, it's such an honor to speak with you, 314 00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:58,960 Speaker 6: and I just want to let you know that your 315 00:22:58,960 --> 00:23:02,240 Speaker 6: male female hour has added incredible value to my marital life. 316 00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:05,280 Speaker 2: Oh good, that's what I love hearing. Thank you. So. 317 00:23:05,520 --> 00:23:08,480 Speaker 6: I'm forty eight, I've been married twenty one years, and 318 00:23:08,560 --> 00:23:10,840 Speaker 6: about ten years ago my husband said that when we 319 00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:13,960 Speaker 6: have sex he feels he's loved and valued by me. 320 00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:17,160 Speaker 6: It's exactly what you said about fifteen minutes ago. 321 00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:22,600 Speaker 2: Well, I am happy that he felt free to tell 322 00:23:22,640 --> 00:23:26,000 Speaker 2: this to you. I am happy that you listened. 323 00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:30,840 Speaker 6: Well, I'm happy too, because he said that at a 324 00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:34,080 Speaker 6: time in our in our life, that was very difficult. 325 00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:37,720 Speaker 6: And you know, through twenty one years, we've had our 326 00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:40,639 Speaker 6: ups and downs and we're back on the upside again. 327 00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:43,679 Speaker 6: So you know, I've just made my sase available at 328 00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:45,639 Speaker 6: least once a week, whether I want it or not, 329 00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:48,719 Speaker 6: and it's it's definitely helped. 330 00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:52,480 Speaker 2: Thank you, Debbie. You've helped a lot of people because 331 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:55,960 Speaker 2: some people may think, oh, well, who's he He's just 332 00:23:56,000 --> 00:24:00,320 Speaker 2: a man. But yes, of course, by the way, that's 333 00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:02,800 Speaker 2: all right. I'm going to deal with the with the 334 00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:08,000 Speaker 2: with the third rail here of the frequency issue, okay, 335 00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:15,480 Speaker 2: because if people avoid some guideline number, it leaves everybody 336 00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:18,200 Speaker 2: in the lurch. And I regret in my two part 337 00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,359 Speaker 2: column about women not being in the mood that I 338 00:24:20,440 --> 00:24:25,399 Speaker 2: didn't specify because it could easily be inferred from what 339 00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:28,119 Speaker 2: I wrote that I meant every day or your allows 340 00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:31,399 Speaker 2: you wife, and I don't. I don't believe that and 341 00:24:31,440 --> 00:24:35,080 Speaker 2: it's not true, and it's hardly what I'm thinking. I 342 00:24:35,359 --> 00:24:42,040 Speaker 2: would say that for a healthy couple, healthy I mean 343 00:24:42,080 --> 00:24:47,879 Speaker 2: physically healthy, emotionally healthy, with with the provisos that nobody 344 00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:53,560 Speaker 2: is perfectly emotionally healthy, obviously and certainly in early age 345 00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:59,480 Speaker 2: and middle age. The number I will give you as 346 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:07,160 Speaker 2: soon as we return that that is blatant, blatant radio formatics, 347 00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:10,440 Speaker 2: blatant back in a moment, Male Female Hour. That is 348 00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:34,119 Speaker 2: breaking good. All right, my friends, Dennis Prager here, this 349 00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:39,920 Speaker 2: is the Male Female Hour. Betty at the Prager office 350 00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:44,720 Speaker 2: tells me that she's getting a whole bunch of calls 351 00:25:44,720 --> 00:25:47,359 Speaker 2: from men because it's in particular because it's hit such 352 00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:50,360 Speaker 2: a nerve this topic, which it's meant to. I don't 353 00:25:50,400 --> 00:25:52,240 Speaker 2: know if nerve is the word. It's hit hit the 354 00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:59,320 Speaker 2: heart and and and people's thoughts here, and I will 355 00:25:59,359 --> 00:26:04,119 Speaker 2: tell you, uh, it is about what happens to a 356 00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:14,360 Speaker 2: husband when deprived regularly or often of sexual intimacy. As 357 00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:18,199 Speaker 2: you heard from a man who called earlier, he just 358 00:26:18,240 --> 00:26:23,680 Speaker 2: eventually got angry, stopped talking, clammed up, and the ultimately 359 00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:29,720 Speaker 2: it ended the marriage. And then the question becomes and 360 00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:32,640 Speaker 2: it's got to be answered at least with some guideline, 361 00:26:33,119 --> 00:26:36,960 Speaker 2: with the understanding that for everybody this may not be 362 00:26:37,119 --> 00:26:40,280 Speaker 2: the perfect answer, But well, what is infrequent? What does 363 00:26:40,320 --> 00:26:47,280 Speaker 2: that mean? And here's a rough guideline for a healthy 364 00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:52,960 Speaker 2: in other words, a normal couple, A healthy guideline would 365 00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:57,520 Speaker 2: be three to four times a month as a basic minimum, 366 00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:01,800 Speaker 2: as a guideline minimum. Now, I think a lot of 367 00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:05,639 Speaker 2: women are relieved because they probably thought, well, what, you know, 368 00:27:05,800 --> 00:27:10,320 Speaker 2: he wants it every day. Now, if it's more than that, 369 00:27:10,320 --> 00:27:13,720 Speaker 2: that's wonderful. It's also wonderful for her, by the way, 370 00:27:13,760 --> 00:27:17,200 Speaker 2: in the final analysis, if he knows what he's doing, 371 00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:20,919 Speaker 2: and I mean that psychologically and physically, and those are 372 00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:26,040 Speaker 2: also aspects to this. I have another guideline here, and 373 00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:29,679 Speaker 2: that is that. And this may be controversial, and for 374 00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:33,040 Speaker 2: different people, different things work, But I don't believe in 375 00:27:33,080 --> 00:27:36,879 Speaker 2: an all or nothing approach on these matters. To be 376 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:41,119 Speaker 2: to be sexually playful without necessarily going the whole way 377 00:27:41,359 --> 00:27:47,119 Speaker 2: is also for many men attention reliever. A man told 378 00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:52,280 Speaker 2: me who had been married about twenty years and obviously divorced, 379 00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,720 Speaker 2: told me, because I have interviewed a fair number of 380 00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:59,240 Speaker 2: men and will continue to do so, and interview women 381 00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:04,040 Speaker 2: and said to me that in the course of his marriage, 382 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:09,280 Speaker 2: if he would playfully touch his wife, let's say they'd 383 00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:11,560 Speaker 2: both be in the kitchen alone, no kids around, no 384 00:28:12,000 --> 00:28:16,600 Speaker 2: friends around, anybody else, and grab her tush, she would 385 00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:18,359 Speaker 2: always say, this is not the place, is not the 386 00:28:18,359 --> 00:28:23,080 Speaker 2: play don't stop it stop it that that too, that 387 00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:26,760 Speaker 2: is like that is the same as no. But it's 388 00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:29,119 Speaker 2: it's so trivial, and yet it's the same as no 389 00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:36,120 Speaker 2: in the bedroom. And now men, men have to men 390 00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:39,160 Speaker 2: have to understand when is okay and when is not too. 391 00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:42,200 Speaker 2: I mean, this is a this is a game where 392 00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:46,920 Speaker 2: common sense applies, and a whole host of things. But 393 00:28:46,920 --> 00:28:50,160 Speaker 2: but if he knows that that him doing that is 394 00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:55,280 Speaker 2: saying I see you sexually, that is great for you, 395 00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:59,560 Speaker 2: dear woman, that is great. You should only be so 396 00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:03,400 Speaker 2: blessed that your husband sees you sexually for decade after 397 00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:08,440 Speaker 2: decade after decade. It is the cement of relationships. Otherwise 398 00:29:08,440 --> 00:29:13,400 Speaker 2: he could have married a guy or stayed single and 399 00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:16,440 Speaker 2: gone from woman to woman. But he chose you to 400 00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:22,800 Speaker 2: be with forever. Now people want a copy of this 401 00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:26,840 Speaker 2: show because they would like their husband or wife for 402 00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:31,040 Speaker 2: both to hear this and every show is available to you. 403 00:29:31,480 --> 00:29:34,560 Speaker 2: The most obvious way is to simply to subscribe to 404 00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:38,760 Speaker 2: the show for a miserable seven dollars a month, and 405 00:29:38,800 --> 00:29:41,240 Speaker 2: then you get every show. When you want it to download, 406 00:29:41,240 --> 00:29:44,320 Speaker 2: you go to praguer Toopia at either Dennispraguer dot com 407 00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:48,200 Speaker 2: or prager Radio dot com. It's called Pragertopia. If you 408 00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:50,959 Speaker 2: just want one show, you can even get that, go 409 00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:53,880 Speaker 2: to Dennis Praguer dot com or call my office eight 410 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:56,640 Speaker 2: hundred two two five eight five eight four eight hundred 411 00:29:56,720 --> 00:30:03,320 Speaker 2: two two five eight five eight four This these are 412 00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:06,120 Speaker 2: not easy things to say. If I choose a topic 413 00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:09,120 Speaker 2: for ease, this would not be the one I would choose. 414 00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:12,760 Speaker 2: In fact, I want to have a nap after this. 415 00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:17,240 Speaker 2: It is so I have to pick every word so carefully, 416 00:30:17,280 --> 00:30:22,240 Speaker 2: but I know the import of the subject. Okay, let's 417 00:30:22,320 --> 00:30:29,480 Speaker 2: go to Connie in Shackapee, Minnesota. Hello, Hello Connie Dennis Priger. 418 00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:31,400 Speaker 7: Oh hi Dennis, can you hear me? 419 00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:32,080 Speaker 2: Sure? 420 00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:35,920 Speaker 7: I love you and I love your show, and I've 421 00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:37,800 Speaker 7: met you a couple of times at the State Fair 422 00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:38,600 Speaker 7: in Minnesota. 423 00:30:38,680 --> 00:30:39,920 Speaker 2: Thank you good and. 424 00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:43,280 Speaker 7: Got your picture. I love it. But anyway, what I'm 425 00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:47,680 Speaker 7: calling for is I just disagree with one little portion 426 00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:52,040 Speaker 7: of what you've been saying in in this male female hours. 427 00:30:52,360 --> 00:30:55,640 Speaker 7: Other times too well, I'm a Christian, so I don't 428 00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:59,080 Speaker 7: want to sound too worldly, you know, but I too 429 00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:04,280 Speaker 7: am choosing my words carefully. I believe a woman's greatest 430 00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:08,920 Speaker 7: need is to be desired, especially by her husband, because 431 00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:11,920 Speaker 7: you want to keep knowing that he desires you down 432 00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:16,160 Speaker 7: the road, right right, So if he shuts down and 433 00:31:16,240 --> 00:31:20,320 Speaker 7: quit's pursuing you after you've seemed too busy, or you've 434 00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:25,080 Speaker 7: had babies, or you're angry about something or whatever, then 435 00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:28,640 Speaker 7: she starts to wonder, why doesn't he love me or 436 00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:31,200 Speaker 7: desire me anymore? What am I cap delivery? You know? 437 00:31:32,880 --> 00:31:35,920 Speaker 2: No, you're absolutely right. Where do you think we differ? 438 00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:43,400 Speaker 7: Well, because I think you said earlier something about a 439 00:31:43,440 --> 00:31:47,320 Speaker 7: woman should act like you desire him, and you do, 440 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:50,560 Speaker 7: but you want to be pursued like you always have been. 441 00:31:50,680 --> 00:31:54,360 Speaker 7: Otherwise you feel like you're undesirable entirely right. 442 00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:57,200 Speaker 2: The only question is which came first, the chicken or 443 00:31:57,200 --> 00:32:03,400 Speaker 2: the egg. Did her refusal as compared to earlier times 444 00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:07,640 Speaker 2: in the marriage, let's say, or for those who engaged 445 00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:12,760 Speaker 2: in this before marriage, is did the later refusals cause 446 00:32:12,840 --> 00:32:18,880 Speaker 2: him to stop desiring or did his stopping desiring shut 447 00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:22,920 Speaker 2: heard down. These are questions that a couple has to 448 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:29,000 Speaker 2: ask themselves, individually and each other. Whatever the answer, we're 449 00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:33,120 Speaker 2: both right. What could be better than his desiring you? 450 00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:37,280 Speaker 2: And and you know, rubbing your tush in the kitchen 451 00:32:38,040 --> 00:32:38,800 Speaker 2: back in a moment? 452 00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:47,480 Speaker 1: This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this. 453 00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:59,840 Speaker 1: Now back to more of Dennis Prager's Timeless Wisdom. 454 00:33:00,040 --> 00:33:03,680 Speaker 5: You saga, Lie say hello? 455 00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:17,080 Speaker 3: Why you say hello? 456 00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:20,640 Speaker 2: Hi? Everybody? Dennis Prager hear the final segment of this 457 00:33:20,800 --> 00:33:26,720 Speaker 2: edition of The Male Female Hour on the unspoken and 458 00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:36,160 Speaker 2: not even expected reality that for a husband, being made 459 00:33:36,240 --> 00:33:40,440 Speaker 2: love to actually is his way of knowing first and 460 00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:43,800 Speaker 2: foremost that he is loved. When that breaks down, he 461 00:33:43,840 --> 00:33:48,360 Speaker 2: doesn't feel it, closes up, gets angry, and then things 462 00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:54,480 Speaker 2: are very bad. Let's go to Heather in Thousand Oaks, California. Hi, Heather, 463 00:33:54,600 --> 00:33:56,840 Speaker 2: Dennis Praeger, Hi, Dennis. 464 00:33:56,600 --> 00:33:58,920 Speaker 3: Hi, I just wanted to say, you know, my mother 465 00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:01,080 Speaker 3: did teach me those things before I was married, and 466 00:34:01,120 --> 00:34:03,560 Speaker 3: it's just been a huge blessing in our marriage. And 467 00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:05,840 Speaker 3: I know that, you know, she basically taught me Okay, 468 00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:09,240 Speaker 3: when your husband's stressed, you need to just pay attention 469 00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:12,120 Speaker 3: and sometimes intimacy will really help him. And you know, 470 00:34:12,120 --> 00:34:13,600 Speaker 3: at first I thought, well, you know what if I'm 471 00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:16,479 Speaker 3: not in the mood. But what I found is that 472 00:34:16,680 --> 00:34:19,640 Speaker 3: when I give of myself when I don't feel like it, 473 00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:21,240 Speaker 3: I always get much more in return. 474 00:34:21,640 --> 00:34:25,120 Speaker 2: That's right, you should you should send you is your 475 00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:28,920 Speaker 2: mother still living? Yes, give your mother a big hug. 476 00:34:29,520 --> 00:34:31,759 Speaker 2: In fact, I take it back, your husband should give 477 00:34:31,760 --> 00:34:36,279 Speaker 2: your mother a big hug. This is not told anymore though, 478 00:34:36,320 --> 00:34:38,800 Speaker 2: because a lot of the mothers are our baby boomers 479 00:34:39,520 --> 00:34:43,600 Speaker 2: who were raised in the age of stupidity, which it 480 00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:46,000 Speaker 2: was inaugurated in the sixties. Just as that we had 481 00:34:46,040 --> 00:34:48,560 Speaker 2: a renaissance and an age of reason, we now live 482 00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:52,400 Speaker 2: in the age of stupidity, when these common sense facts 483 00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:57,480 Speaker 2: of life are are just denied and we have the 484 00:34:57,560 --> 00:35:02,560 Speaker 2: results have been catastrophic for so many people. And so yes, 485 00:35:03,120 --> 00:35:05,719 Speaker 2: let's see Julian Denver her husband and she had been 486 00:35:05,719 --> 00:35:09,640 Speaker 2: married for twenty one years. She calls sex husband insurance. 487 00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:15,080 Speaker 2: It's so common sense. And of course, the issue which 488 00:35:15,080 --> 00:35:18,239 Speaker 2: I've discussed and written about, the question of mood, the 489 00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:21,279 Speaker 2: age of upidity, if I had to characterize why it's 490 00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:23,760 Speaker 2: been such a foolish age, because it has told people 491 00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:26,040 Speaker 2: to do things only if they feel like doing it. 492 00:35:27,239 --> 00:35:30,440 Speaker 2: And that is the single dumbest piece of advice a 493 00:35:30,520 --> 00:35:34,040 Speaker 2: human being can ever be given. Only do something if 494 00:35:34,080 --> 00:35:37,080 Speaker 2: you feel like doing it. I cannot think of much 495 00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:41,080 Speaker 2: good that would happen on earth if people acted always 496 00:35:41,480 --> 00:35:43,640 Speaker 2: when they felt like it and only when they felt 497 00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:49,399 Speaker 2: like it, and that includes sex in marriage to the others. Well, 498 00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:51,200 Speaker 2: most have hung up, Bill and Heather, I didn't get 499 00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:54,359 Speaker 2: to you, and then forgive me again. This hour and 500 00:35:54,440 --> 00:35:57,960 Speaker 2: all are available at the Dennis Praeger dot com or 501 00:35:58,000 --> 00:36:02,200 Speaker 2: at eight hundred to two two five eight five eight four. 502 00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:07,319 Speaker 2: All right, this has been the Male Female Hour, and 503 00:36:07,360 --> 00:36:24,759 Speaker 2: I thank you for listening. Don't go away. 504 00:36:33,160 --> 00:36:37,520 Speaker 1: This has been timeless wisdom with Dennis Prager. Visit Dennisprager 505 00:36:37,560 --> 00:36:41,080 Speaker 1: dot com for thousands of hours of Dennis's lectures, courses, 506 00:36:41,120 --> 00:36:45,759 Speaker 1: and classic radio programs, and to purchase Dennis Prager's Rational Bibles.