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Speaker 1: Life Audio.

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Speaker 2: Success in this journey doesn't always only have to be

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Speaker 2: measured in like if we actually, you know, quit drinking

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Speaker 2: for good, there's so many other personal growth things that

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Speaker 2: come into play, whether it's like you're digging into the

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Speaker 2: Bible or you've learn so much more and you feel

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Speaker 2: just stronger in general, like, we can set up other

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Speaker 2: measures of success than just did you drink or not.

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Speaker 3: This podcast is for the woman who loves Jesus or

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Speaker 3: who is longing to reconnect with him and who knows

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Speaker 3: deep down that alcohol is no longer serving her. I'm

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Speaker 3: your host and your coach, Christy Osborn. Here we'll talk honestly,

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Speaker 3: with grace and truth about how stepping away from wine

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Speaker 3: opens the door to the love, joy, peace and connection

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Speaker 3: you've been searching for. Because, Babe, those were never meant

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Speaker 3: to be found in a bottle of wine, They're found

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Speaker 3: in Jesus. Through scripture, coaching and neuroscience, I'll help you

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Speaker 3: make sense of your habits, your nervous system, and your

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Speaker 3: heart so freedom feels possible and sustainable. You don't have

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Speaker 3: to do this alone, babe. Welcome to Love Life Sober. Today,

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Speaker 3: we are talking to Erica Anderson, who is a writer

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Speaker 3: and a mom of two who lives in Indianapolis, Indiana.

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Speaker 3: She has written for so many incredible publications, including The

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Speaker 3: New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, the Washington Post.

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Speaker 3: She's written three books. Today, we're talking about her latest book,

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Speaker 3: Freely Sober, Rethinking Alcohol through the Lens of Faith. We

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Speaker 3: talk about alcohol and the church, should Christians even drink

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Speaker 3: it all? And we also touch on the new US

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Speaker 3: health guidelines for alcohol. This is such an important conversation

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Speaker 3: and I cannot wait for you to hear it. Hi, Erica,

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Speaker 3: Welcome to the Love Life Sober Podcast. Thank you so

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Speaker 3: much for being here. I'm so excited to talk to

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Speaker 3: you today about so many things, but specifically about your

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Speaker 3: brand new book, Freely Sober, Rethinking Alcohol through the Lens

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Speaker 3: of Faith. H We need it, babe, We need this book.

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Speaker 3: How are you what's going on?

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Speaker 1: Yes, thank you so much.

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Speaker 2: You caught me one week after launch and so it's

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Speaker 2: been kind of crazy, but this is definitely one of

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Speaker 2: my number one podcasts that I wanted to talk to.

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Speaker 2: So thank you for taking the time and you know,

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Speaker 2: giving me space to talk about this book in my story.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so important, babe.

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Speaker 3: I know that there are others out there, so please

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Speaker 3: no one take offense to this comment. But I feel

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Speaker 3: like it's you and me as far as like the

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Speaker 3: women that are trying to talk to the like Christian

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Speaker 3: gals who are struggling with alcohol, and luckily we have

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Speaker 3: our friend John Seidel who's talking to men and women.

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Speaker 3: But our books are there are kind of like the

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Speaker 3: only resources that I know of. Is that true for

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Speaker 3: you too, even after coming through writing this and the

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Speaker 3: launch and everything, Yeah, I don't.

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Speaker 2: I don't see many that are like specifically just alcohol

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Speaker 2: for Christian women, which is why you probably and me decided, hey,

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Speaker 2: we need to write these books because you know, when

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Speaker 2: I was getting sober back six years ago or so,

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Speaker 2: you know, over that time, I couldn't find a resource

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Speaker 2: Like I read lots of secular stuff, lots of memoirs,

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Speaker 2: love them, still love them, I read them all the

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Speaker 2: time still, but it was like something is missing and

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Speaker 2: I needed this book and your book when I was

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Speaker 2: in that time period, and I felt very just sort

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Speaker 2: of like sad that there wasn't something out there that

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Speaker 2: was specifically for four believers.

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Speaker 3: Yes, me too. Oh my gosh, you hit the nail

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Speaker 3: on the head. I just remember sitting there reading devotionals

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Speaker 3: alongside like the quilet that we both know so well,

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Speaker 3: and thinking like, why.

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Speaker 1: Aren't these one right?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you kind of had to like piecemeal it together,

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Speaker 2: and and if it wasn't, you know, I don't know,

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Speaker 2: like people that try to write stuff about this that

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Speaker 2: haven't actually been through it themselves, there's just like kind

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Speaker 2: of a missing link. So we needed somebody who's walked

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Speaker 2: through the fire and been there and knows exactly how

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Speaker 2: it feels and come out on the other side, like

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Speaker 2: I needed that. And so luckily we are seeing more

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Speaker 2: of that kind of thing these days. I think with

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Speaker 2: our writers group, we've got people talking about it, and

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Speaker 2: we're talking about it more and people are kind of

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Speaker 2: coming out being more open.

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Speaker 1: And more vulnerable.

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Speaker 2: But in terms of having like here's the thing that

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Speaker 2: you buy to help you right now, there's not a lot.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, one hundred percent. And we need more stories, right

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Speaker 3: because even though there's so many similarities in your story

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Speaker 3: and my story, like they are also so uniquely different.

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Speaker 3: And that is what I really really want to showcase

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Speaker 3: with this podcast, is the testimonies and the freedom stories.

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Speaker 3: And because we all see ourselves, you know, differently in

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Speaker 3: other people's stories, and so what your book is, how

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Speaker 3: your book is going to speak to someone, and your

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Speaker 3: particular story is going to be different than mine, even

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Speaker 3: though they are they're all based in scripture, which is

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Speaker 3: so cool.

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Speaker 1: I totally agree.

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Speaker 2: I used to listen to a lot of secular sobriety podcasts,

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Speaker 2: and I at the beginning, you know, I was just

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Speaker 2: hooked on hearing different people's stories, even though they were

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Speaker 2: you know, there was similarities, but every week it was

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Speaker 2: like I would I was hungry for these stories because

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Speaker 2: they gave me hope. They gave me hope that people

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Speaker 2: in all these different facets of areas of their life

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Speaker 2: and all these different sort of seasons of their life

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Speaker 2: were able to do this. And it kind of just

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Speaker 2: goes to show you that what's possible.

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Speaker 1: And I needed that encouragement, especially in the beginning. Yes,

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Speaker 1: one hundred percent. I love that so much.

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Speaker 3: So with that, will you tell us a little bit

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Speaker 3: of your story? How did you get to the place

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Speaker 3: six years ago where you're like, I don't want to

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Speaker 3: drink anymore? And what has it looked like? And then

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Speaker 3: I would love to dive into some of the parts

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Speaker 3: of the book that were my favorite.

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Speaker 2: Sure, yeah, so it wasn't. It wasn't just a one

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Speaker 2: moment thing, as you probably can guess. It was over

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Speaker 2: many years really. I mean I started thinking about it

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Speaker 2: long before I actually attempted to quit, simply because I

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Speaker 2: would find myself in moments where I thought, I'm drinking

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Speaker 2: too much, or I want this too much, or I've

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Speaker 2: said something stupid. You know, it just like didn't my

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Speaker 2: behavior the way that I was feeling compelled to drink

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Speaker 2: that didn't line up with who I wanted to be.

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Speaker 1: I knew it wasn't good for me. I knew it

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Speaker 1: was detrimental to.

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Speaker 2: My faith in some ways because I felt very cut

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Speaker 2: off from God in the Holy Spirit anytime I was drinking.

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Speaker 2: You know, I love this quote that I don't know

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Speaker 2: who said it, but it's something like, you know, the

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Speaker 2: devil doesn't need you to even get addicted, He just

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Speaker 2: needs you to be distracted.

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Speaker 1: That's really what it would do for me.

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Speaker 2: And I literally would have a picture in my head

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Speaker 2: of if I'm drinking, Satan can go somewhere else and

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Speaker 2: not worry about me because there's nothing good going to happen.

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Speaker 2: Not that not that I was going to go do

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Speaker 2: something horrible, but just like I'm not doing any good

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Speaker 2: for the kingdom, I'm you know, so he can just

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Speaker 2: go worry about someone else. And so that was like

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Speaker 2: very eye opening to me to have that realization, Like

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Speaker 2: I really actually thought that in my mind, and I

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Speaker 2: just thought, why am I doing this? And I would

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Speaker 2: pray about it, that God would take away this desire,

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Speaker 2: that I would not ruggle with this, that I would

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Speaker 2: just find freedom from this, and you know, I in

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Speaker 2: my mind I thought, I hope that I can get

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Speaker 2: rid of this out of my life someday.

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Speaker 1: But it just felt impossible.

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Speaker 2: It really just felt impossible that I would ever quit drinking.

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Speaker 2: But it was the thought, and I've shared this many times,

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Speaker 2: but I'll share it again of one day I thought,

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Speaker 2: do you want to be dealing with this when you're

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Speaker 2: seventy years old? And that sort of recognition of my

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Speaker 2: own mortality and what it would mean if I don't

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Speaker 2: kick this really scared me, and I was like, no,

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Speaker 2: I really don't. I don't want to be praying these

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Speaker 2: prayers when I'm old, you know. And so I think

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Speaker 2: it was a combination of all these thoughts and factors

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Speaker 2: and movement to where I started investigating a little bit

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Speaker 2: more about alcohol and googling things, and that's when I

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Speaker 2: found Annie Grace's This Naked Mind and some other communities

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Speaker 2: and books, and I just started reading, not really expecting

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Speaker 2: myself so much to quit drinking because I was reading,

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Speaker 2: but just like, Okay, maybe if I just like look

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Speaker 2: into this, maybe there's something to it that I don't

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Speaker 2: know that's empowering. And so it was a slow process

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Speaker 2: over a couple of years before I was actually able

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Speaker 2: to quit. But that's one of the things that I

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Speaker 2: really encourage people to do, is like, don't put so

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Speaker 2: much pressure on yourself, like allow yourself to get information

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Speaker 2: because that information might change your mindset a little bit.

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Speaker 3: Yeah that's so so good, babe. How long do you

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Speaker 3: think it was? And it can be like a ballpark

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Speaker 3: estimate situation of like when you felt the Holy Spirit

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Speaker 3: tap you on the shoulder and say I think you

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Speaker 3: should look at your relationship with drinking, to when you

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Speaker 3: finally had that moment of like okay, it's time.

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Speaker 1: Oh man, gosh.

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Speaker 2: I mean honestly, the first time I probably heard that

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Speaker 2: was when I was like eighteen, because I started drinking

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Speaker 2: in high school and by the end of high school,

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Speaker 2: like it was really just.

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Speaker 1: My senior year that I really was drinking much.

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Speaker 2: And I remember by the end of high school, I

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Speaker 2: was like, I this isn't right, like immature way of thinking,

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Speaker 2: but I was like, I need to go to Christian

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Speaker 2: College so I can get away from all this, which

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Speaker 2: little did I know Christian colleges don't really take you

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Speaker 2: away from drinking, I've been told by people. But I

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Speaker 2: was like, I've got to like fully get this out

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Speaker 2: of my life and like get serious. And I didn't

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Speaker 2: end up going to Christian College, so it didn't get

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Speaker 2: it out of my life, and just kind of continued

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Speaker 2: using alcohol in unhealthy ways. And really at that time

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Speaker 2: in my life when I was young, in my twenties,

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Speaker 2: I was, you know, like so many people do, I

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Speaker 2: put myself in really bad situations where I was you know,

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Speaker 2: I remember walking home alone in the dark and going

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Speaker 2: over to people's houses that I didn't know, being in

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Speaker 2: situations where you know, you put yourself at risk, especially

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Speaker 2: as a woman, and nothing bad happened to me.

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Speaker 1: So it's like, well, I just kept kept going.

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Speaker 2: But throughout my twenties I would have these over drinking

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Speaker 2: situations where I would have all this shame and guilt

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Speaker 2: and really hate myself, you know, take a week off

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Speaker 2: and then it would be like, oh, I'm fine, and

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Speaker 2: just this constant cycle. But I would say it was

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Speaker 2: probably early thirties maybe when I started to just realize like, hey,

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Speaker 2: I'm getting older, like do you want to get a

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Speaker 2: handle on this, But it wasn't until like eight or

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Speaker 2: nine years later that I actually did it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I think that's really important to point

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Speaker 3: out though, right. I think it's important to point out

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Speaker 3: that there that there can be a length of time

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Speaker 3: where you're wrestling with this and that that is okay.

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Speaker 3: Because one of the things I think that is so

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Speaker 3: important to point out is that, like laying down, alcohol

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Speaker 3: can be part of our sanctification journey and not necessarily.

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Speaker 3: Of course, becoming free from alcohol is amazing and there's

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Speaker 3: so many gifts and blessings with that, but if you

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Speaker 3: look at it in all the lessons that the Lord

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Speaker 3: taught you in those years, and how alcohol played a

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Speaker 3: part in teaching you those things, right, it's just I

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Speaker 3: think it helps to be able to say it so

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Speaker 3: we can hold the process lighter. And maybe you're coming

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Speaker 3: off of an attempt at dry January and you feel

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Speaker 3: like you failed because you didn't hit thirty one day mark.

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Speaker 3: But if we just hold that like a little bit

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Speaker 3: lighter and ask God what he's trying to teach us

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Speaker 3: in the journey, in the whole, if you zoom out

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Speaker 3: a little bit, then you can trust in his timing

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Speaker 3: and his process.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I think there is you said wrestling.

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Speaker 2: It's better to be wrestling than to just could be

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Speaker 2: completely avoiding it, right, going me up direction, you know,

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Speaker 2: wrestling is is what's happening if you were thinking about this,

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Speaker 2: if you're praying about this, and like that's a positive move.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I think it's hard not to know. It

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Speaker 2: seems black and wise, like, well, why can't I just stop?

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Speaker 2: But it's like every time that you are putting this

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Speaker 2: into prayer, every time that you are, you know, asking

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Speaker 2: God to help you, or you're taking a step where

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Speaker 2: you're you know, not drinking one day, like all of

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Speaker 2: those things are moving you toward it. And I talked

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Speaker 2: recently about finding an old prayer journal of mine that

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Speaker 2: I had written all these prayers down in twenty fourteen,

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Speaker 2: where I was really struggling with this, and I just

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Speaker 2: it was super revelationary to me to say, like all

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Speaker 2: that time mattered that I was praying about this, Like

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Speaker 2: today I'm free from alcohol, but God heard me in

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Speaker 2: those moments too, and like all of those moments were

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Speaker 2: necessary to get me to the place where I needed

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Speaker 2: to be.

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Speaker 1: Now, it took a lot longer than I would have

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Speaker 1: liked for it to take.

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Speaker 2: Had I've been able to do this earlier, sure, maybe

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Speaker 2: I would have had more years of you.

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Speaker 1: Know, sort of more flourishing in that way.

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Speaker 2: However, like it takes as long as it takes, and

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Speaker 2: as long as we continue looking toward God and striving

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Speaker 2: for that obedience, we're doing the right thing and we're

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Speaker 2: gonna He's not going to let us go.

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Speaker 1: And he hears us and he's walking with us.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm so so glad that you said that, babe,

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Speaker 3: because when you said I didn't want to wake up

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Speaker 3: at seventy, there's so many gals in my community that

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Speaker 3: are in that like you know, age bracket of sixty

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Speaker 3: seventy empty nesters. And what I what I want to

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Speaker 3: encourage those gals is exactly what you just said, right,

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Speaker 3: It takes as long as it takes, and God has

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Speaker 3: taught you so much up until this point, and your

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Speaker 3: prayers were not wasted, and those testimonies because of that

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Speaker 3: amount of time can be so incredibly rich. Then to

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Speaker 3: go turn around and help, you know, the younger generations,

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Speaker 3: it's so it's so valuable.

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Speaker 2: I mean, if you just think about any time you hear,

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Speaker 2: like when you hear the story of a man that

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Speaker 2: went back to college and got his degree when he's

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Speaker 2: seventy five years old, or you know somebody that wrote

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Speaker 2: their first book you know, at an older age like that.

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Speaker 2: To me, those stories are so inspiring and beautiful because

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Speaker 2: like we're living life till the end and number one

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Speaker 2: and we don't even know when the end, like my

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Speaker 2: life getten tomorrow, right, and so it's like we are

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Speaker 2: called to live our lives as long as God has

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Speaker 2: us on this planet and living our lives you know,

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Speaker 2: I mean, doing the next right thing to what God

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Speaker 2: has called this no matter how old we are.

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Speaker 1: And so yeah, certainly not meant to be discouraging, just.

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Speaker 2: Like as a this is the next thing God has

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Speaker 2: for you, like, and he has something good because of

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Speaker 2: that when we follow him into that.

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Speaker 3: It reminds me of I heard Priscilla Schreyer speak last

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Speaker 3: year and she was asked by somebody in an interview,

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Speaker 3: like who inspires you most? And they thought the answer

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Speaker 3: was going to be some famous theologian or speakers, and

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Speaker 3: she said, basically, the little old ladies at church that

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Speaker 3: have shown up and have been faithful every single Sunday

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Speaker 3: and working in the ministry for just years and years.

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Speaker 3: And those are the people that she found the most inspiring.

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Speaker 3: And so that is what I think we book just

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Speaker 3: said is just keep going.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean my grandma, I mean my grandma is

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Speaker 2: I mean, she's passed away, but she had probably the

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Speaker 2: most influence on me in terms of my faith and

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Speaker 2: just the kind of person that I am. And she

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Speaker 2: never was a speaker or wrote a book or did anything,

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Speaker 2: but she was just so faithful to loving others and

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Speaker 2: loving God. And one hundred percent she would be my

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Speaker 2: number one as well in that way.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that so much, Babe. We'll be back

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Speaker 3: right after this, Babe. Can I pause us just for

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Speaker 3: a moment. If you're listening to this and thinking I

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Speaker 3: don't want to do this alone anymore, I want to

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Speaker 3: tell you about the Love Life Sober Community. This is

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Speaker 3: the space where the podcast turns into real connection and

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Speaker 3: real support. Inside the community, we gather weekly for live

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Speaker 3: connection calls, where you can listen, share, or simply be present.

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Speaker 3: There's a beautiful leadership team holding this space with wisdom

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Speaker 3: and care, a dedicated prayer request area where you can

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Speaker 3: be covered, regular masterclasses led by expert guests, and even

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Speaker 3: a worship music playlist to help you reconnect when your

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Speaker 3: nervous system needs it. Inside the community, there's also a

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Speaker 3: dedicated coaching space called Truevine for women who want even

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Speaker 3: deeper support. The Love Life Sober Community is a place

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Speaker 3: to connect with like minded women and open up in

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Speaker 3: a way you might not be able to in your

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Speaker 3: church or small group. This space was created specifically for

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Speaker 3: women who are questioning their relationship with alcohol and who

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Speaker 3: want the kind of freedom that can only be found

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Speaker 3: in Jesus. All the details to join us are at

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Speaker 3: the link in the show notes. I can't wait to

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Speaker 3: meet you all right, let's jump back into the episode.

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Speaker 3: I actually just was coaching a gal and we've been

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Speaker 3: coaching on and off for about three years, and she

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Speaker 3: has just come so far in her relationship with God

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Speaker 3: because of the alcohol battles and just like going to

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Speaker 3: him and like learning so many different things about trusting

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Speaker 3: him and about him showing up even though she was struggling.

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Speaker 3: And I asked her this question today and like it's

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Speaker 3: made me like tear out because I said, can you

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Speaker 3: be thankful that three years ago he didn't set you

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Speaker 3: free from alcohol because of everything he taught you? And

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Speaker 3: this woman has had like major health scares and like

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Speaker 3: there's so much going on, and she was just like, yes,

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Speaker 3: I'm so grateful. And it has been three years of

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Speaker 3: her seeking God, trying to break free from alcohol and

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Speaker 3: learning about him and so all that to emphasize that

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Speaker 3: the timeframe, it doesn't matter if it takes eight years, right, right.

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Speaker 1: And also I was just thinking about this yesterday.

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Speaker 2: You know, our success in this journey doesn't always only

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Speaker 2: have to be measured in like if we actually, you know,

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Speaker 2: quit drinking for good, there's so many other personal growth

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Speaker 2: things that come into play, whether it's like you're digging

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Speaker 2: into the Bible or you learn so much more and

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Speaker 2: you feel just stronger in general, Like we can set

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Speaker 2: up other measures of success than just did you drink

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Speaker 2: or not?

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Speaker 1: Because Obviously it's not just about the drinking, right like

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Speaker 1: it's about everything else.

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Speaker 2: And so if there are other things that also improve

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Speaker 2: and change, even if you don't one hundred percent get

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Speaker 2: the drinking down, that also really matters. And so we

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Speaker 2: can use that as leverage and use that as strength.

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Speaker 1: Yes, one hundred percent, one hundred percent.

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Speaker 3: There's so many lessons there, but I think one of

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Speaker 3: my favorites to highlight is the opportunity to learn how

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Speaker 3: to take your thoughts captive, because it is very easy

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Speaker 3: to tell what a craving voice sounds like. And when

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Speaker 3: you learn what a craving voice sounds like, you learn

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Speaker 3: what your thoughts kind of sound like, and then you're

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Speaker 3: able to isolate them and figure out what is story

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Speaker 3: and what is actually true. And so I mean, I

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Speaker 3: don't think I would have ever learned that lesson in

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Speaker 3: the same way without the alcohol story.

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Speaker 1: Do you agree?

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Speaker 2: I totally do, because it's just so distinct and it's

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Speaker 2: so obvious. It's an obvious one to be able to

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Speaker 2: kind of grasp and be like, all right.

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Speaker 1: There it is, what are we going to do with it?

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Speaker 1: The other thing is.

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Speaker 2: I think worth mentioning is just one of the biggest

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Speaker 2: lessons for me when quitting drinking was so many times

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Speaker 2: those of us that deal with this issue of the

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Speaker 2: craving and all of that, like it feels to me

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Speaker 2: and this is maybe just part of my personality typetoo.

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Speaker 2: When I feel something bad, I feel like it's gonna

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Speaker 2: last forever. Yeah, And I'm like, Okay, this is never

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Speaker 2: going away. My kid's never ever going to sleep through

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Speaker 2: the night, or you know, my arm is always going

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Speaker 2: to hurt.

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Speaker 1: I'm always going to want to drink.

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Speaker 2: But what I've found, you know, some of the we've

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Speaker 2: all given tips and tricks, but you know, one of

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Speaker 2: the tips that I always give is like, here's a

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Speaker 2: list of five things you have to do before you

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Speaker 2: take a drink, So like go out and take five breaths,

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Speaker 2: drink a full glass of water. You know, and you

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Speaker 2: realize once you kind of practice set a couple times,

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Speaker 2: that feeling actually doesn't last. And actually, if the time

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Speaker 2: passes and you do something else or you give your

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Speaker 2: body and mind something that actually needs you may realize,

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Speaker 2: Oh and then the next time that happens, you can

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Speaker 2: actually be like, okay, go back to that last situation.

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Speaker 2: The feeling passed last time, and that gets stronger. It's

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Speaker 2: like a muscle every time you do it. And that

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Speaker 2: was really helpful to me. Yeah, that's such a good reminder, babe.

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Speaker 2: It is such a good reminder because you're so right

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Speaker 2: when you're in it. It doesn't feel like it feels

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Speaker 2: like it's going to feel like that forever. One of

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Speaker 2: my other favorite things to tell clients is to put

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Speaker 2: a timer on. And if you put a timer on,

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Speaker 2: it's usually like thirty minutes where it's really intense and

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Speaker 2: that craving feels like it is smacking you in the

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Speaker 2: face over and over and over again. But it is

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Speaker 2: if and we can do anything by the grace of

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Speaker 2: God for thirty minutes, right. And I love that tip

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Speaker 2: to just do five things right. Take a walk, hop

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Speaker 2: on your peloton, drink a glass of water, open up

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Speaker 2: the Bible, read your favorite psalm you know.

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Speaker 1: Or or you know.

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Speaker 2: It's also just like it can also be like a

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Speaker 2: sensory thing. I mean, it's not always convenient to like

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Speaker 2: splash cold water in your face if you have makeup on,

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Speaker 2: you know. But like that's another thing. I mean, people,

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Speaker 2: I'm not gonna I'm not gonna say hey, everybody, should

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Speaker 2: do cold plunging.

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Speaker 1: I don't do that. I don't. I don't. I don't

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Speaker 1: like to be cold. I'm never going to get into

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Speaker 1: cold plunging because I do not like to be cold.

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Speaker 2: I hate being cold. However, I will say I totally understand.

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Speaker 2: I've done it. I get why people do it. But

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Speaker 2: you can do that on a smaller level. And one

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Speaker 2: thing that I do sometimes I will fill up a

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Speaker 2: bowl of ice water as ice in it, and I'll

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Speaker 2: just do my face and it really does like shock

438
00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:19,800
Speaker 2: your system, okay, and it makes you think about something else,

439
00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:21,800
Speaker 2: and it's worth thinking of things like that that you

440
00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:24,080
Speaker 2: can do. I mean, whether it's like if it's pulled outside,

441
00:20:24,080 --> 00:20:25,720
Speaker 2: you just go outside to stick your face in some

442
00:20:25,960 --> 00:20:28,560
Speaker 2: ice water, you know, or like the endorphins of a

443
00:20:28,640 --> 00:20:32,919
Speaker 2: workout also help. But like that kind of stuff shows

444
00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:36,639
Speaker 2: you how really physical this is and how we actually

445
00:20:36,640 --> 00:20:38,959
Speaker 2: do have the power to overcome these things. It is

446
00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:42,600
Speaker 2: not necessary to do what it's telling you to do,

447
00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:45,399
Speaker 2: even though it feels like it, right one hundred percent.

448
00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:48,720
Speaker 2: But who taught us to regulate our nervous system? Right?

449
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:49,760
Speaker 1: I never learned that.

450
00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:53,159
Speaker 2: It's true, true, Yeah, it's not taught that's kind of

451
00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:55,240
Speaker 2: the problem, is like we need think about this from

452
00:20:55,280 --> 00:20:58,280
Speaker 2: the bottom up, when people are littler than they are

453
00:20:58,760 --> 00:20:59,960
Speaker 2: before built like one hundred.

454
00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:02,680
Speaker 3: But that's another gift in doing this work. Instead of

455
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:04,159
Speaker 3: telling our kids stop crying.

456
00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:04,760
Speaker 1: While are you crying?

457
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:06,960
Speaker 3: It's not gonna help anything, we can be like let

458
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:08,720
Speaker 3: it out, babe.

459
00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:13,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, absolutely, we're we're helping the next generation. Even

460
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:14,840
Speaker 2: though I could probably do a better job with that,

461
00:21:14,960 --> 00:21:16,600
Speaker 2: but we you know, we all have our moments.

462
00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:19,080
Speaker 3: We all could do a better job, but we're trying

463
00:21:19,119 --> 00:21:23,800
Speaker 3: our best. Let's talk about the book freely, sober. I

464
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 3: am so excited that this is out in the world, babe,

465
00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:28,720
Speaker 3: because I feel like it's one of those things right

466
00:21:28,760 --> 00:21:30,520
Speaker 3: because we're in our author's group together. I feel like

467
00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:33,000
Speaker 3: we've been talking about it for a while and we

468
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:35,040
Speaker 3: both know how long this process takes.

469
00:21:35,119 --> 00:21:38,040
Speaker 1: But it is out in the world. She is so beautiful.

470
00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:43,040
Speaker 3: I would love, Yeah, I would love to talk about this.

471
00:21:43,119 --> 00:21:47,639
Speaker 3: Should Christians even drink chapter? Because I think this is

472
00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:51,560
Speaker 3: so important. There's so much scripture in here, so gals,

473
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:54,800
Speaker 3: when you go get this book, circle all the good

474
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:58,200
Speaker 3: scripture because it's so so good. I wanted to really

475
00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:01,240
Speaker 3: go into this in Life of Life Sober, but you

476
00:22:01,359 --> 00:22:04,600
Speaker 3: went into the weeds where I wanted to go, and

477
00:22:04,680 --> 00:22:06,480
Speaker 3: so I'm so grateful.

478
00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:09,280
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, it's funny, Christy, because in the

479
00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:11,560
Speaker 2: original draft of this book I didn't even have this

480
00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:14,840
Speaker 2: chapter in here really, but when I turned in the draft,

481
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:17,399
Speaker 2: they were like, you know, in your proposal you really

482
00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:19,199
Speaker 2: talked about this and you don't really have it in

483
00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:19,760
Speaker 2: the book yet.

484
00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:22,960
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, okay, So I really liked

485
00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:23,640
Speaker 1: writing the chapter.

486
00:22:23,720 --> 00:22:27,160
Speaker 2: So this chapter was actually written last weirdly, even though

487
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:29,800
Speaker 2: it's chapter two, and I just thought it was super

488
00:22:29,840 --> 00:22:33,720
Speaker 2: interesting and like, I just dove into it. And it's

489
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:36,760
Speaker 2: funny that it's funny the scripture that you find in

490
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:38,920
Speaker 2: the Bible that maybe you didn't notice before, like where

491
00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:42,480
Speaker 2: I talk here on page thirty six, Proverbs twenty three,

492
00:22:42,840 --> 00:22:44,720
Speaker 2: and I was like, oh my gosh, this is me.

493
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:48,520
Speaker 2: This is a hangover. Listen, who has woe, who has sorrow,

494
00:22:48,720 --> 00:22:53,000
Speaker 2: who has contentions, complaints, who has wounds without cause, redness

495
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,880
Speaker 2: of eyes, those who linger long at the wine, those

496
00:22:55,920 --> 00:22:58,440
Speaker 2: who go in search of mixed wine, do not look

497
00:22:58,440 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 2: at the wine when it is read, when it sparkles

498
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:03,320
Speaker 2: in the cup when it swirls around smoothly, at the

499
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:06,639
Speaker 2: last it bites like a serpent and stings like a viper.

500
00:23:07,160 --> 00:23:09,760
Speaker 2: Your eyes will see strange things, and your heart will

501
00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:14,560
Speaker 2: utter perverse things. I mean, you're like, how did I

502
00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:17,639
Speaker 2: not notice this was in the Bible and you're reading it,

503
00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:20,159
Speaker 2: and it's like, yeah, like when you're drunk, like you

504
00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:22,880
Speaker 2: see things that maybe aren't there, or you say things

505
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:25,960
Speaker 2: that you wouldn't say. You know, you don't feel good,

506
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:28,760
Speaker 2: and it's like a viper. It's like a serpent like

507
00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:31,679
Speaker 2: it it looks good and then it's really bad, and

508
00:23:31,720 --> 00:23:35,240
Speaker 2: it's like, we should take this seriously. The Bible warns

509
00:23:35,240 --> 00:23:39,040
Speaker 2: against drunkenness seventy times depending on what version you're reading,

510
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:42,840
Speaker 2: but clearly it's something to stay away from and that

511
00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:46,000
Speaker 2: God has warned us against because it will have power

512
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:46,440
Speaker 2: over us.

513
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:50,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, one hundred. Anyway, that's just one, one really big

514
00:23:50,280 --> 00:23:51,080
Speaker 1: one that stuck out to me.

515
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:53,679
Speaker 3: You know what My favorite actually lyne about in this

516
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:56,480
Speaker 3: proverb is the very last one, which is which says,

517
00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:59,400
Speaker 3: when shall I awake, that I may seek another drink?

518
00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,960
Speaker 3: Because how he wake up and have hair oft the dog?

519
00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:06,159
Speaker 2: Yes, I mean this whole thing right here, Like, this's

520
00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:07,439
Speaker 2: why I had to put the whole thing in here,

521
00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:09,400
Speaker 2: because I usually I am like I want to put huge

522
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:11,679
Speaker 2: chunks just because it's harder to read. BROSI, Well, this

523
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:14,000
Speaker 2: has to all go in because it's like could have

524
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:15,040
Speaker 2: been written yesterday.

525
00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:21,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, so talk to the woman who is thinking to themselves.

526
00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:24,080
Speaker 3: But Jesus turned water into wine. Wine is in the Bible.

527
00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:27,840
Speaker 3: We have wine with communion. God created it. It's fine,

528
00:24:28,119 --> 00:24:30,440
Speaker 3: it's not a problem for me. What would you say

529
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:30,800
Speaker 3: to her?

530
00:24:31,160 --> 00:24:32,919
Speaker 2: Well, I would say, first of all, if it's not

531
00:24:32,960 --> 00:24:35,320
Speaker 2: a problem for you, then it's not a problem for you.

532
00:24:35,720 --> 00:24:38,439
Speaker 2: But if you're listening to this podcast, you might have

533
00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:41,800
Speaker 2: thought about it a few times, and it doesn't have

534
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:44,960
Speaker 2: to be a big, big honkn ruin your life problem

535
00:24:45,000 --> 00:24:47,639
Speaker 2: to be a problem. What's not a problem for someone

536
00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:49,960
Speaker 2: else may be a problem for you. And so you

537
00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:53,000
Speaker 2: get to define your terms. And I always like to say,

538
00:24:53,160 --> 00:24:56,119
Speaker 2: you know, rock bottom is where you decide to stop digging,

539
00:24:56,520 --> 00:25:00,000
Speaker 2: and so if your rock bottom is up here, that's awesome.

540
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:02,800
Speaker 2: So it's not good to get down here, like you'd

541
00:25:02,880 --> 00:25:05,639
Speaker 2: rather avoid the heartache and the destruction that comes with

542
00:25:06,040 --> 00:25:08,479
Speaker 2: getting to that point, or maybe it's just sort of

543
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:11,239
Speaker 2: like you're uncomfortable with this or you feel convicted by this,

544
00:25:11,359 --> 00:25:12,960
Speaker 2: like we should listen to that, we should listen to

545
00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:15,080
Speaker 2: that nudge in our hearts. So anyway, all to say

546
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:17,560
Speaker 2: that in the Bible, yeah, there is certainly drinking in

547
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:20,720
Speaker 2: the Bible. I don't think that drinking period in and

548
00:25:20,760 --> 00:25:23,120
Speaker 2: of itself is a sin. But one thing I learned

549
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:25,399
Speaker 2: in writing this is just that the alcohol of the

550
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:26,760
Speaker 2: Bible was a little different.

551
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:27,520
Speaker 1: Than the alcohol of today.

552
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:30,119
Speaker 2: A lot of the wine in the Bible was more diluted,

553
00:25:30,480 --> 00:25:33,560
Speaker 2: some of it wasn't really alcoholic at all. Some of

554
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:35,880
Speaker 2: it was not to say that it wasn't like certainly

555
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:38,359
Speaker 2: at weddings and things like that, they brought out the

556
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:41,320
Speaker 2: stronger wine, but it was more of a daily drinking thing.

557
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:44,640
Speaker 2: Sometimes it was drink because the water wasn't clean, and

558
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,560
Speaker 2: you know, so it was a very different mindset around

559
00:25:47,640 --> 00:25:50,960
Speaker 2: why and when people were drinking. Whereas today it's like

560
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,800
Speaker 2: the alcohol of today is just so high in alcohol

561
00:25:53,880 --> 00:25:57,520
Speaker 2: content for the most part, it's also available in every

562
00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:01,440
Speaker 2: flavor and form, on every street corner, for every rhyme

563
00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:03,800
Speaker 2: and reason, and there's not a lot of moderation, and

564
00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:08,280
Speaker 2: there's not a lot of encouragement to be responsible with it.

565
00:26:08,280 --> 00:26:09,359
Speaker 1: It's just sort of like.

566
00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:12,280
Speaker 2: Live and let live, and we have it, and it's

567
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:15,479
Speaker 2: integrated into every part of you know, Western modern life,

568
00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:17,239
Speaker 2: and you're not supposed to have a problem because it's

569
00:26:17,240 --> 00:26:20,400
Speaker 2: supposed to be fun. And so when you are comparing,

570
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:22,120
Speaker 2: just like so many other things in the Bible, there's

571
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:26,000
Speaker 2: context and you really have to take that into consideration.

572
00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:29,960
Speaker 3: We'll be back right after this. And you wrote in here,

573
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,360
Speaker 3: which is the same for me, is in our kind

574
00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:34,800
Speaker 3: of sobriety journeys. It's the first time we read the

575
00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:39,520
Speaker 3: Bible cover to cover and that is such obviously it's

576
00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:42,840
Speaker 3: a game changer because you understand more of that context.

577
00:26:43,080 --> 00:26:46,040
Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, I mean the Bible is you know, most

578
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:48,080
Speaker 2: people probably know this and have heard this, but the

579
00:26:48,080 --> 00:26:51,960
Speaker 2: Bible is one big book and you really need to

580
00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:54,239
Speaker 2: read the whole thing within context. And I don't know,

581
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:56,879
Speaker 2: I grew up not really getting that. I guess like

582
00:26:56,920 --> 00:26:59,119
Speaker 2: I probably was told that but wasn't listening or something.

583
00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:03,280
Speaker 2: But you know, everything in the Old Testament is part

584
00:27:03,320 --> 00:27:06,159
Speaker 2: of the New Testament, and everything is going in the

585
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:09,600
Speaker 2: same direction, and it's telling the same big story. So

586
00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:12,120
Speaker 2: I do think it's important for just like our literacy

587
00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:14,359
Speaker 2: of the Bible and understanding of all the different issues

588
00:27:14,400 --> 00:27:16,679
Speaker 2: in it, to read the whole thing in that context.

589
00:27:17,119 --> 00:27:17,959
Speaker 1: Yeah, I hadn't.

590
00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:20,919
Speaker 3: I hadn't realized that Jesus is actually all over the

591
00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:23,479
Speaker 3: Old Testament right until you read it as one big,

592
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:24,560
Speaker 3: one big book.

593
00:27:24,560 --> 00:27:26,720
Speaker 1: As you said, yeah, how many things make more sense.

594
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 2: We're like, oh, oh, okay, that's yes, I'm putting it

595
00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:33,159
Speaker 2: together now that everything is about Jesus.

596
00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:35,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.

597
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:38,480
Speaker 3: One of the illustrations that you give in here, which

598
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:40,320
Speaker 3: I love and I actually heard you say this somewhere

599
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:42,080
Speaker 3: else and it stuck with me when maybe you wrote

600
00:27:42,080 --> 00:27:43,960
Speaker 3: it in a substack and I think it's a John

601
00:27:44,040 --> 00:27:48,240
Speaker 3: Piper sermon, but talk about how drinking alcohol can be

602
00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:49,800
Speaker 3: a sin and so can drinking water.

603
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:52,119
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, So I loved it when I found this,

604
00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:54,520
Speaker 2: call was like, oh that that makes the whole point.

605
00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:56,480
Speaker 2: And so this is kind of what it was is

606
00:27:56,520 --> 00:27:58,360
Speaker 2: someone had asked him, you know, is it a sin

607
00:27:58,440 --> 00:28:00,840
Speaker 2: to drink alcohol? And he's I'm going to give you

608
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:03,040
Speaker 2: the same answer I would give you to the question

609
00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:04,560
Speaker 2: is it a sin to drink water?

610
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 1: And the answer is that it could be.

611
00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:10,560
Speaker 2: You know, if you're drinking water and someone else needs

612
00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:13,160
Speaker 2: it more, but you're drinking it as like a selfish thing,

613
00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:14,960
Speaker 2: then yeah, it's a sin to be drinking that water.

614
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:17,480
Speaker 2: If you're drinking water when someone just warned you that

615
00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:20,240
Speaker 2: it's contaminated it might kill you, that's a sin because

616
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:23,439
Speaker 2: we're supposed to protect our bodies and so drinking water

617
00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:26,200
Speaker 2: can be a sin. So it's not about the water,

618
00:28:26,400 --> 00:28:29,120
Speaker 2: and it's not about the wine, right, It's about the

619
00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:30,760
Speaker 2: heart and like.

620
00:28:30,840 --> 00:28:34,040
Speaker 1: The intention why you're doing it. Yeah, and same thing

621
00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 1: with wine.

622
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:36,640
Speaker 2: If you're doing it for the wrong reasons, If you're

623
00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:40,240
Speaker 2: doing it in a way that harms your body, takes

624
00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:44,120
Speaker 2: you away from God, is harmful to someone else, like

625
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:47,640
Speaker 2: say your children or your family or whatever like, then

626
00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:51,040
Speaker 2: it is a sin. And any time that you are

627
00:28:51,080 --> 00:28:54,440
Speaker 2: getting drunk, that is a sin. And buzzed, I'm sorry,

628
00:28:54,520 --> 00:28:58,000
Speaker 2: buzz also counts as drunk because it's altering your mind

629
00:28:58,240 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 2: and you're not able to think clearly, don't have as

630
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:03,880
Speaker 2: good discernment and what you're going to be doing. And

631
00:29:04,000 --> 00:29:08,160
Speaker 2: just just an off point on kids. Kids notice everything,

632
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:11,320
Speaker 2: and kids notice if you are even slightly buzzed. They

633
00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:14,560
Speaker 2: are so attuned to even the littlest changes in your

634
00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:17,840
Speaker 2: the way that you speak or your behavior, and we

635
00:29:18,320 --> 00:29:19,720
Speaker 2: shouldn't be doing that to our kids.

636
00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 1: It makes them not feel safe. Yeah, that's so true.

637
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:24,640
Speaker 3: I'm so glad that you said that, and I think

638
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:28,160
Speaker 3: that that is a is something that probably, like if

639
00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:30,880
Speaker 3: I were listening to this podcast, I'm just thinking about myself.

640
00:29:31,240 --> 00:29:34,520
Speaker 3: If I was just exploring my relationship with alcohol and

641
00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:37,680
Speaker 3: I would have heard somebody say buzz is the same,

642
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:41,280
Speaker 3: I would have been so resistant. And so if that

643
00:29:41,400 --> 00:29:44,000
Speaker 3: is you listening to that this right now, just stick

644
00:29:44,080 --> 00:29:47,479
Speaker 3: with us and stay curious and keep learning, because I

645
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:50,560
Speaker 3: understand and so does Erica, like how that can land

646
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:52,840
Speaker 3: in a way that's like, oh really, but that's the

647
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:56,160
Speaker 3: only way I can relax, girls, or that's my only

648
00:29:56,240 --> 00:29:59,000
Speaker 3: reward at the end of the day, and God made

649
00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:02,480
Speaker 3: it so it's fine. Just keep open and keep curious

650
00:30:02,560 --> 00:30:05,160
Speaker 3: because it goes back to what you said earlier, right,

651
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:07,880
Speaker 3: It's like, if you're kind of like not all there,

652
00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:10,280
Speaker 3: the devil doesn't have to worry about you. He can

653
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:13,360
Speaker 3: go work on someone else because you're distracted. You're distracted

654
00:30:13,400 --> 00:30:15,000
Speaker 3: and you're numbed out. That's so good.

655
00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:16,160
Speaker 1: I want to talk about it.

656
00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:17,800
Speaker 3: And you write about this a lot, not only in

657
00:30:17,840 --> 00:30:20,560
Speaker 3: the book, but also and you're a substack about the

658
00:30:20,680 --> 00:30:24,200
Speaker 3: church and alcohol, because I think this is so important.

659
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:26,840
Speaker 1: Do you think the church is doing enough? And what

660
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:27,960
Speaker 1: can it do different?

661
00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:31,240
Speaker 3: And what do you want to see the church as

662
00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:35,040
Speaker 3: a whole kind of do to come alongside the women

663
00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:39,880
Speaker 3: that are not just struggling with deep, deep addiction but

664
00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:42,040
Speaker 3: for maybe you and me and like more of.

665
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:42,720
Speaker 1: The gray area.

666
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:47,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I love the church and I am not

667
00:30:48,120 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 2: someone that likes to go out and criticize all the

668
00:30:50,920 --> 00:30:53,160
Speaker 2: good things with the church, because yeah, because I think

669
00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:57,080
Speaker 2: most churches are sort of small, heads down, doing the

670
00:30:57,080 --> 00:31:00,640
Speaker 2: best they can where they are, and so I you know,

671
00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:03,160
Speaker 2: applaud the church for so much of what they do.

672
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:04,440
Speaker 1: I do think.

673
00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:07,320
Speaker 2: There's been a bit of a blind spot when it

674
00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:10,720
Speaker 2: comes to this, simply, you know, partially because you know,

675
00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:13,200
Speaker 2: whenever it was decades ago when the church was like,

676
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:15,640
Speaker 2: you know, alcohol is a personal freedom issue.

677
00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:16,920
Speaker 1: I mean we did have times.

678
00:31:16,640 --> 00:31:19,240
Speaker 2: When it was like drinking is bad and like nobody drank,

679
00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:21,320
Speaker 2: but like that's not how it is these days. And

680
00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:23,640
Speaker 2: so I think it's been seen as a personal freedom issue,

681
00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:27,160
Speaker 2: therefore not really addressed. And also it's because it's something

682
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:30,040
Speaker 2: people don't really want to think about, they don't really

683
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:30,600
Speaker 2: want to hear.

684
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,080
Speaker 1: Someone about it. It's just sort of like under the radar.

685
00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:36,760
Speaker 2: And also people that are struggling a lot of gray

686
00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:40,240
Speaker 2: area people especially nobody knows they're struggling because they're doing

687
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:41,720
Speaker 2: it in private, they're doing it at home, they're not

688
00:31:41,720 --> 00:31:43,560
Speaker 2: telling anyone because they don't want they don't want to

689
00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:46,560
Speaker 2: have to stop. And so I think what I'd like

690
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:49,080
Speaker 2: to do with this book and these conversations is just

691
00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:52,360
Speaker 2: bring that awareness to the conversation. So when you look

692
00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:55,280
Speaker 2: at the statistics, I can't think right now what the

693
00:31:55,280 --> 00:31:57,680
Speaker 2: stat is in terms of how what percentage of women

694
00:31:57,720 --> 00:31:59,960
Speaker 2: are struggling with alcohol in some way, shape or form,

695
00:32:00,360 --> 00:32:02,920
Speaker 2: but you can basically like transpose that onto the church

696
00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:05,959
Speaker 2: and know that, like if your church has two hundred

697
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:08,440
Speaker 2: women in it, you know twenty of them may be

698
00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:12,080
Speaker 2: struggling with alcohol. Just knowing that statistic gives you information

699
00:32:12,120 --> 00:32:13,760
Speaker 2: to be able to speak to that. And I'm not

700
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:16,280
Speaker 2: saying there should be like a huge figma on alcohol

701
00:32:16,360 --> 00:32:18,040
Speaker 2: in the church, but I do think we need to

702
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:21,160
Speaker 2: number one, be like, we know they're people struggling, even

703
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 2: if you don't know who they are. How can we

704
00:32:23,840 --> 00:32:27,240
Speaker 2: open up the opportunity for them to share or guide

705
00:32:27,240 --> 00:32:29,320
Speaker 2: them and disciple them and speak to them in this

706
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:32,440
Speaker 2: way without it being shameful or you know anything like that.

707
00:32:32,560 --> 00:32:34,840
Speaker 2: I just think we need I think the church needs

708
00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:39,280
Speaker 2: to be aware of this as a problem for both

709
00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:43,000
Speaker 2: men and women and then open up those conversations, whether

710
00:32:43,040 --> 00:32:45,400
Speaker 2: it's having a class or a prayer time or even

711
00:32:45,440 --> 00:32:48,400
Speaker 2: offering anonymous prayer requests where they're able, people are able

712
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:49,400
Speaker 2: to share for the first time.

713
00:32:49,560 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 1: I think that is what's missing.

714
00:32:51,640 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 2: And so many times I think, like with a lot

715
00:32:53,840 --> 00:32:57,520
Speaker 2: of issues these days that end up being related to

716
00:32:57,760 --> 00:33:00,360
Speaker 2: political stuff, a lot of pasts, or just of like

717
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:02,440
Speaker 2: don't know how to handle it, so they just don't

718
00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:03,160
Speaker 2: talk about it.

719
00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:05,000
Speaker 1: But then people are left in the dark.

720
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:07,240
Speaker 2: And I can tell you when I was really struggling,

721
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:09,680
Speaker 2: if someone at the church had set up and been like, hey,

722
00:33:09,680 --> 00:33:11,840
Speaker 2: we're going to have a like a prayer meeting about this,

723
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:14,000
Speaker 2: or you know, if this is something you're struggling with,

724
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:17,120
Speaker 2: like it's okay, like to struggle and we're here for

725
00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:20,840
Speaker 2: you that would have really felt relieving to me. Yeah,

726
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:24,120
Speaker 2: to have that open door, And so I would like

727
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:27,280
Speaker 2: more churches to open that door very intentionally.

728
00:33:27,640 --> 00:33:28,280
Speaker 1: Yeah.

729
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:30,640
Speaker 3: It reminds me of when I was pitching Love Life

730
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 3: Sober and I was in a meeting with one of

731
00:33:32,760 --> 00:33:36,720
Speaker 3: the big publishers and one of the men on the

732
00:33:36,760 --> 00:33:39,800
Speaker 3: panel said, what woman is going to hold this book

733
00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:43,320
Speaker 3: in church? I was just like, and that is why

734
00:33:43,560 --> 00:33:47,960
Speaker 3: we need it, right, We need to open up that.

735
00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:48,960
Speaker 1: You know.

736
00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:51,360
Speaker 2: Part of the problem is it's like we only hear

737
00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:54,080
Speaker 2: a lot of times in public the stories of people

738
00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:56,840
Speaker 2: who really went to the depths of despair overcame and

739
00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:57,720
Speaker 2: have this you.

740
00:33:57,680 --> 00:33:59,840
Speaker 1: Know, big beautiful redemption story.

741
00:34:00,080 --> 00:34:02,000
Speaker 2: And those are beautiful and I love those, but like,

742
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:04,280
Speaker 2: that's not going to be everybody's story, and we need

743
00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:06,600
Speaker 2: to make it okay to struggle in the middle and

744
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:09,600
Speaker 2: to deal with the struggle when it's not you know,

745
00:34:09,760 --> 00:34:12,000
Speaker 2: where you're not ruining your life, but you're like life

746
00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:14,880
Speaker 2: could be better, and it's okay to want that, and

747
00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:17,400
Speaker 2: it's okay to talk about that, and you know, we

748
00:34:17,480 --> 00:34:19,440
Speaker 2: need to get I mean, I think part of that

749
00:34:19,480 --> 00:34:22,640
Speaker 2: will help get rid of assumptions and stereotypes and make

750
00:34:22,680 --> 00:34:26,360
Speaker 2: it okay for people to struggle out in the open

751
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:29,560
Speaker 2: and never have to get to that point where it's

752
00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:30,080
Speaker 2: so bad.

753
00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:32,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, I totally agree. One of the things that I

754
00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:35,759
Speaker 3: get frustrated by. And I don't know, and I think

755
00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:39,479
Speaker 3: this is different contextually anywhere and totally based on where

756
00:34:39,480 --> 00:34:41,680
Speaker 3: you live. But I'll tell you I do not think

757
00:34:41,840 --> 00:34:44,240
Speaker 3: the UK is doing a great job of not making

758
00:34:44,320 --> 00:34:48,560
Speaker 3: alcohol in church as like and I again, I'm not

759
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:50,640
Speaker 3: here to take down the church. I love the church too,

760
00:34:50,840 --> 00:34:53,880
Speaker 3: but it very much feels like it's anti the Romans.

761
00:34:53,960 --> 00:34:56,880
Speaker 1: It's making it a stumbling block situation.

762
00:34:57,080 --> 00:35:00,279
Speaker 3: Like I was at there's this really like cool urch

763
00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:02,680
Speaker 3: that my teen daughter likes to go to because apparently

764
00:35:02,680 --> 00:35:04,680
Speaker 3: one of the boys from the summer I turn pretty

765
00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:05,040
Speaker 3: goes there.

766
00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 2: So she.

767
00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:10,480
Speaker 3: Will get on a train and she will go commute

768
00:35:10,480 --> 00:35:12,080
Speaker 3: like an hour to go to this church. And I

769
00:35:12,120 --> 00:35:15,320
Speaker 3: went to a service with her ones and at the beginning,

770
00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:18,640
Speaker 3: the pastor was like, okay, everyone meet at the pub

771
00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:21,360
Speaker 3: when the service is over, first round is on me.

772
00:35:22,080 --> 00:35:26,320
Speaker 1: And I was just like, what, No, I don't like

773
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:26,879
Speaker 1: that at all.

774
00:35:27,400 --> 00:35:30,200
Speaker 3: And like, again, it's one of those things where here

775
00:35:30,560 --> 00:35:32,440
Speaker 3: everything is done at the pub like it is just

776
00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:33,239
Speaker 3: still that way.

777
00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:36,520
Speaker 1: Unfortunately, even in this day and age.

778
00:35:37,160 --> 00:35:39,920
Speaker 2: It's like, you know, the social side, People like what

779
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:41,719
Speaker 2: the social side, It's like, well, you don't have to

780
00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:44,280
Speaker 2: drink actual alcoholity social.

781
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:45,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my gosh.

782
00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:48,520
Speaker 3: So then let's transition then into the doctor ozeb at All.

783
00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:50,239
Speaker 1: I know that's where I was thinking. That's where I

784
00:35:50,239 --> 00:35:52,879
Speaker 1: was going in my head. Yeah, what is going on, babe?

785
00:35:52,920 --> 00:35:54,600
Speaker 3: Because your boots on the ground in the US, But

786
00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:56,279
Speaker 3: I'm not boots on the ground there right now?

787
00:35:56,680 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 1: What is going on?

788
00:35:57,640 --> 00:36:01,480
Speaker 3: We made such headway, but it's the We're going to

789
00:36:01,520 --> 00:36:05,320
Speaker 3: put the labels on and it causes cancer, there's no

790
00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:09,319
Speaker 3: doubt about it. And this no alcohol, it's good for you.

791
00:36:09,440 --> 00:36:12,640
Speaker 3: And now we've swung the other way, which is so bizarre.

792
00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:13,319
Speaker 1: Yeah.

793
00:36:13,440 --> 00:36:15,919
Speaker 2: So it's so funny because I don't I didn't even

794
00:36:15,960 --> 00:36:18,840
Speaker 2: know that this had happened. Someone had just set me

795
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:20,040
Speaker 2: a DM the other day, was like, what do you

796
00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:22,399
Speaker 2: think about this new change? I was like, I guess

797
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:24,680
Speaker 2: I didn't realize there was a change. Like I knew

798
00:36:24,680 --> 00:36:26,439
Speaker 2: there was a new food pyramid guidelines, but I didn't

799
00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:27,440
Speaker 2: know there was alcohol changes.

800
00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:29,120
Speaker 1: So I went and look and I was like, why

801
00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:29,920
Speaker 1: would they do this?

802
00:36:30,480 --> 00:36:32,759
Speaker 2: Right, It's been one way for many years, and it

803
00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:35,279
Speaker 2: was already bad because it was like women shouldn't have

804
00:36:35,320 --> 00:36:37,080
Speaker 2: more than one drink a day and men shouldn't have

805
00:36:37,120 --> 00:36:38,880
Speaker 2: more than two, which is which is too much at

806
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:42,400
Speaker 2: least health wise. That's like not that's too much for

807
00:36:42,560 --> 00:36:45,480
Speaker 2: your body health wise. And then they had also had

808
00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:48,000
Speaker 2: that distinction between men and women, which does really matter

809
00:36:48,080 --> 00:36:51,120
Speaker 2: because women's bodies are so different. Yeah, so now so

810
00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:54,120
Speaker 2: they change are from that to drink less alcohol for

811
00:36:54,160 --> 00:36:58,080
Speaker 2: a healthier life something like that, So zero guidance whatsoever,

812
00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:01,560
Speaker 2: and no distinction between men and women. And so I'm

813
00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:04,640
Speaker 2: just thinking to myself, why did that happen? And the

814
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:07,600
Speaker 2: only thing I can think is that somebody that cares

815
00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:10,600
Speaker 2: about the alcohol industry has influenced this. I don't know

816
00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:12,920
Speaker 2: what else it could be, because why what you know,

817
00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:16,279
Speaker 2: as you said, like they have been recommending we put

818
00:37:16,320 --> 00:37:20,080
Speaker 2: these cancer labels on alcoholic beverages just like cigarettes, and

819
00:37:20,120 --> 00:37:22,200
Speaker 2: I thought that was great. And so I see this

820
00:37:22,400 --> 00:37:24,600
Speaker 2: and like it wasn't being talked about, it's not being reported,

821
00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:26,360
Speaker 2: like that's why I'm sort of trying to bring it

822
00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:27,880
Speaker 2: to like because I'm like you know, and part of

823
00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:29,759
Speaker 2: you is like, you know, I got some people on

824
00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:32,759
Speaker 2: TikTok being like, well, you should just take responsible responsibility

825
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:34,480
Speaker 2: for yourself and educate yourself, and it's like, yeah, of

826
00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:35,240
Speaker 2: course you should.

827
00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:35,720
Speaker 1: You should.

828
00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:39,959
Speaker 2: However, something coming from the top down, from the head

829
00:37:39,960 --> 00:37:43,640
Speaker 2: of government down, does influence the thought process behind this,

830
00:37:43,800 --> 00:37:46,719
Speaker 2: and it does influence the way people behave and all

831
00:37:46,760 --> 00:37:48,719
Speaker 2: of that. So it actually does matter, and when they

832
00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:50,399
Speaker 2: get it wrong, I think that.

833
00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:51,319
Speaker 1: It should be called out.

834
00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:55,080
Speaker 2: So just as the US government is so concerned with

835
00:37:55,120 --> 00:37:56,839
Speaker 2: getting toxins and dies out of our.

836
00:37:56,840 --> 00:38:00,080
Speaker 1: Heads, which I call this coloring stuff, yeah, well this

837
00:38:00,160 --> 00:38:01,640
Speaker 1: does not line up with that at all.

838
00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:05,120
Speaker 2: This is like moving away from the Maha mentality.

839
00:38:05,719 --> 00:38:08,120
Speaker 1: And so I don't know, I don't know what to say.

840
00:38:08,160 --> 00:38:11,000
Speaker 2: I'm very curious, but somebody had to have an influence

841
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:11,279
Speaker 2: on that.

842
00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:13,520
Speaker 3: Don't know who it is though, yeah, oh my gosh,

843
00:38:13,640 --> 00:38:15,120
Speaker 3: let's try to find out who it is.

844
00:38:15,280 --> 00:38:16,839
Speaker 1: Oh yeah. And then doctor.

845
00:38:16,520 --> 00:38:20,520
Speaker 2: Oz said, you know, alcohol is a social lubricant that

846
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:23,480
Speaker 2: brings people together and is very connecting. And it's like, dude,

847
00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:27,640
Speaker 2: this like that is the wrong mindset. You know, I

848
00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:30,520
Speaker 2: haven't drank for over five years. And I'm a very

849
00:38:30,600 --> 00:38:36,000
Speaker 2: social person, so I constantly am at gatherings and doing things,

850
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:38,839
Speaker 2: and I just don't drink alcohol. And there's so many

851
00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:43,080
Speaker 2: non alcoholic options out there. It's really just like why

852
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:47,240
Speaker 2: don't we just reframe the situation? We just need more opportunities.

853
00:38:47,840 --> 00:38:52,160
Speaker 2: I mean, like in the modern life, we are less

854
00:38:52,320 --> 00:38:55,520
Speaker 2: social people in general, so we you know, there's been

855
00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:57,840
Speaker 2: a breakdown of like the third place, the place that

856
00:38:58,000 --> 00:39:01,680
Speaker 2: people would gather outside of work and home to be together.

857
00:39:02,120 --> 00:39:04,680
Speaker 1: Like that's been broken down and it doesn't have anything

858
00:39:04,719 --> 00:39:05,600
Speaker 1: to do with alcohol.

859
00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:09,359
Speaker 2: We need to restore like that civic part of society

860
00:39:09,760 --> 00:39:12,560
Speaker 2: and bring people together for the for good reasons instead

861
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:14,840
Speaker 2: of just being like, yeah, well if we take away alcohol,

862
00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:15,960
Speaker 2: what are you gonna do?

863
00:39:16,040 --> 00:39:19,000
Speaker 1: Because that's just a that's an that's an excuse.

864
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:24,360
Speaker 3: Yeah it It completely ignores obviously the fact that alcohol

865
00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:29,200
Speaker 3: is highly addictive, right, It's like that, yeah it because okay,

866
00:39:29,239 --> 00:39:32,160
Speaker 3: it's a social lubricant. But if you have one, how

867
00:39:32,239 --> 00:39:34,719
Speaker 3: lubricated are you going to be after you have three?

868
00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:37,400
Speaker 3: Even though you only wanted to have one. It reminds

869
00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:40,080
Speaker 3: me of the big Do you remember the Diagio campaign

870
00:39:40,080 --> 00:39:42,439
Speaker 3: that came out like was it two years ago where

871
00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:45,319
Speaker 3: they basically put in the ad all the things that

872
00:39:45,560 --> 00:39:48,360
Speaker 3: we tried as when we were trying to moderate, of

873
00:39:48,480 --> 00:39:50,640
Speaker 3: like have a glass of water and then have a

874
00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:53,279
Speaker 3: non alcoholic version of that beer, and then you're going

875
00:39:53,360 --> 00:39:56,799
Speaker 3: to be a moderate drinker. And it's like, yes, you're

876
00:39:56,960 --> 00:39:59,680
Speaker 3: completely ignoring that after drink one, you don't want a

877
00:39:59,719 --> 00:40:02,000
Speaker 3: glass of water obviously.

878
00:40:02,000 --> 00:40:04,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, no you don't. Which I was never that person

879
00:40:04,680 --> 00:40:06,719
Speaker 2: that could do that either. But the other thing is

880
00:40:06,800 --> 00:40:10,640
Speaker 2: like to downplay alcohol, which is a drug. To downplay

881
00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:14,839
Speaker 2: that is really irresponsible because I mean, people maybe call

882
00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:18,560
Speaker 2: me a Debbie downer, but when you look at alcohol

883
00:40:18,719 --> 00:40:23,040
Speaker 2: and how like ninety percent of domestic violence involves alcohol,

884
00:40:23,640 --> 00:40:27,719
Speaker 2: crime almost always involves alcohol and drugs. I mean, so

885
00:40:27,960 --> 00:40:33,480
Speaker 2: many bad things come from using alcohol, and that doesn't

886
00:40:33,480 --> 00:40:36,120
Speaker 2: mean that they always happen, but it does mean that

887
00:40:36,160 --> 00:40:38,960
Speaker 2: it's a serio. It's something to take very seriously and

888
00:40:39,040 --> 00:40:41,920
Speaker 2: not mess around with and think about very carefully. And

889
00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:46,240
Speaker 2: there's very little instruction in how to do that responsibly

890
00:40:46,320 --> 00:40:48,520
Speaker 2: and well, and so people are just sort of left

891
00:40:48,560 --> 00:40:50,440
Speaker 2: to their own devices, and so I don't know, I

892
00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:52,920
Speaker 2: think it's irresponsible of doctor Oz to say that and

893
00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:56,279
Speaker 2: for the administration to be changing the guidelines to move

894
00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:58,759
Speaker 2: away from something that's better for us.

895
00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:02,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, you nail that, babe. It reminds me.

896
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:04,240
Speaker 3: One of my favorite interviews I did was with doctor

897
00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:06,439
Speaker 3: Rob Teresi. I don't know if you've come across him,

898
00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 3: but he has spent like thirty plus years studying the

899
00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:15,799
Speaker 3: direct correlation between when an adolescent starts drinking and how

900
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:18,560
Speaker 3: much harm is going to come to them over their lifetime.

901
00:41:19,120 --> 00:41:22,399
Speaker 3: And it literally is directly related to the fact that

902
00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:25,040
Speaker 3: the younger you start drinking and the more you drink,

903
00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:28,960
Speaker 3: the more harm will come to you. And they studied

904
00:41:28,960 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 3: a lot, like specifically zeroed in on college students. But

905
00:41:31,960 --> 00:41:36,000
Speaker 3: it's exactly right. It's why are we spending so much time?

906
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:38,160
Speaker 3: And listen, I don't even know the ins and outs

907
00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:39,680
Speaker 3: of this. I'm just throwing it out there because I

908
00:41:39,719 --> 00:41:41,680
Speaker 3: feel like it's on Instagram all the time. But are

909
00:41:41,719 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 3: we really spending this much time on red dye number

910
00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:46,920
Speaker 3: whatever it is, and not on alcohol, which is literally

911
00:41:47,400 --> 00:41:50,080
Speaker 3: a class one carcinogen the same as asbestos.

912
00:41:50,120 --> 00:41:52,160
Speaker 1: And you know what I mean, It makes no sense.

913
00:41:52,239 --> 00:41:56,520
Speaker 2: Actually, it's like people don't compute it or something like

914
00:41:56,560 --> 00:41:58,200
Speaker 2: they're like, yeah, maybe I don't know.

915
00:41:58,239 --> 00:42:00,560
Speaker 1: It's like they don't really believe it when we say that.

916
00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:03,719
Speaker 2: But to speak to your point about the younger you are,

917
00:42:03,960 --> 00:42:05,440
Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, that's the other thing is like the

918
00:42:05,440 --> 00:42:07,960
Speaker 2: younger you drink or do drugs the first time, like

919
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:10,759
Speaker 2: the more likely you already be addicted. That's just how

920
00:42:10,760 --> 00:42:13,560
Speaker 2: it is. If you don't drink till say you're twenty five.

921
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:16,360
Speaker 2: And this is not me speaking, this is like research

922
00:42:16,400 --> 00:42:18,600
Speaker 2: I've done that I believe it is also in the book,

923
00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 2: your chance of becoming addicted is very, very low because

924
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:27,000
Speaker 2: your brain is fully formed and those pathways are not

925
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:29,440
Speaker 2: going to be trained to feel like they need it.

926
00:42:29,480 --> 00:42:31,400
Speaker 2: That doesn't mean you can't get addicted, of course, but

927
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:33,680
Speaker 2: it is ill to say like this is all sort

928
00:42:33,680 --> 00:42:37,160
Speaker 2: of by design with alcohol. It's meant to change your

929
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:39,759
Speaker 2: brain and make you want more of it. Which is

930
00:42:39,840 --> 00:42:42,719
Speaker 2: why take it all the way back around. For so

931
00:42:42,840 --> 00:42:45,120
Speaker 2: many years when I was shaming myself and saying I

932
00:42:45,120 --> 00:42:47,600
Speaker 2: don't have enough self discipline, I don't have enough willpower,

933
00:42:47,640 --> 00:42:50,520
Speaker 2: I'm a bad Christian, I didn't have the full story

934
00:42:50,560 --> 00:42:53,600
Speaker 2: and understanding that I had trained my body with this,

935
00:42:53,680 --> 00:42:58,200
Speaker 2: like abusive, bad substance to quote need it, and the

936
00:42:58,239 --> 00:43:01,520
Speaker 2: whole time, I'm like blaming my and my low willpower,

937
00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:03,799
Speaker 2: not recognizing that I actually needed to do something to

938
00:43:03,800 --> 00:43:06,160
Speaker 2: physically get it out of my system in order to

939
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:07,920
Speaker 2: actually be empowered to say no.

940
00:43:08,120 --> 00:43:10,600
Speaker 1: And there's a lot of misunderstanding with that. Yeah, that's

941
00:43:10,600 --> 00:43:11,239
Speaker 1: so good, babe.

942
00:43:11,239 --> 00:43:14,160
Speaker 3: I'm so glad you said that, And I just what

943
00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:17,240
Speaker 3: a perfect way to land the plane.

944
00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:18,640
Speaker 1: That is so so good.

945
00:43:19,480 --> 00:43:22,400
Speaker 3: Every chapter of Love Life Sober ends with a tiny

946
00:43:22,480 --> 00:43:25,359
Speaker 3: new action, and I would love for you to give

947
00:43:25,719 --> 00:43:28,600
Speaker 3: the listeners one tiny new action and then please please

948
00:43:28,640 --> 00:43:31,960
Speaker 3: please tell us where we can all find freely sober

949
00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 3: and we can more read more of your writing.

950
00:43:34,840 --> 00:43:38,600
Speaker 2: I'll say this, I have been really getting into mobility lately,

951
00:43:39,120 --> 00:43:43,160
Speaker 2: just like I love stretching. If you are not regularly

952
00:43:43,360 --> 00:43:46,479
Speaker 2: just like stretching your body. We know how it feels

953
00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:48,279
Speaker 2: so good, like when you get up in the right yeah, yeah,

954
00:43:48,920 --> 00:43:50,480
Speaker 2: like you can actually make it. The whole rest of

955
00:43:50,520 --> 00:43:52,840
Speaker 2: your body feels like that, feel like that. It's so amazing,

956
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:55,480
Speaker 2: And so I would just say, like, start stretching.

957
00:43:55,880 --> 00:43:57,960
Speaker 3: Maybe put that in as one of your five things

958
00:43:58,040 --> 00:43:59,160
Speaker 3: right when you've got a craving.

959
00:43:59,239 --> 00:44:01,280
Speaker 1: It's just do a good stretch. Yeah. Yeah.

960
00:44:01,520 --> 00:44:04,359
Speaker 2: But also like I just I've been doing it every day,

961
00:44:04,400 --> 00:44:08,040
Speaker 2: Like I'm actually doing this little mobility app and you're

962
00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:10,920
Speaker 2: just like, wow, this is something that feels so good.

963
00:44:11,000 --> 00:44:13,759
Speaker 2: It's so good for me. It gets you out of

964
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:17,319
Speaker 2: your head, it's clarifying to your thoughts. I mean, it's

965
00:44:17,440 --> 00:44:20,120
Speaker 2: just like it's it's weird how magical it is for me.

966
00:44:20,200 --> 00:44:22,920
Speaker 2: So I would say, like google some mobility videos and

967
00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:25,800
Speaker 2: just like start stretching because you're gonna feel better just overall.

968
00:44:25,920 --> 00:44:28,439
Speaker 1: So that's that's something I would say for my little

969
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:29,000
Speaker 1: thing today.

970
00:44:29,160 --> 00:44:31,239
Speaker 3: I love that. I love that. Tell everybody where they

971
00:44:31,239 --> 00:44:32,360
Speaker 3: can find freely Sober.

972
00:44:32,640 --> 00:44:32,920
Speaker 1: Yeah.

973
00:44:33,000 --> 00:44:35,520
Speaker 2: So you can find freely Sober and more information about

974
00:44:35,520 --> 00:44:38,080
Speaker 2: it at freelysober dot com. But if you're like totally

975
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:40,240
Speaker 2: ready to buy it, you can just go on Amazon

976
00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:42,440
Speaker 2: and buy it Freely Sober er Ka Anderson. You know

977
00:44:42,480 --> 00:44:45,720
Speaker 2: wherever books are sold most common, Amazon is the quickest

978
00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:48,399
Speaker 2: spot to get it. And yeah, and if you liked

979
00:44:48,400 --> 00:44:51,000
Speaker 2: this episode or you related to me, like would love

980
00:44:51,040 --> 00:44:52,360
Speaker 2: to connect with you if you want to send me

981
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:53,480
Speaker 2: a DM on Instagram.

982
00:44:53,640 --> 00:44:55,480
Speaker 1: Erica Underscore Anderson.

983
00:44:55,239 --> 00:44:57,760
Speaker 2: And just yeah, I'll be around the community, and Christy

984
00:44:57,800 --> 00:45:00,279
Speaker 2: and I are friends, so I appreciate you listen all

985
00:45:00,280 --> 00:45:01,640
Speaker 2: the way to the end if you're here.

986
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:05,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you so much, babe. And we are brainstorming

987
00:45:05,520 --> 00:45:08,279
Speaker 3: about a really cool masterclass that Erica can do in

988
00:45:08,320 --> 00:45:11,600
Speaker 3: the Love Life Sober Community. So there's more information on

989
00:45:11,719 --> 00:45:15,200
Speaker 3: joining us in the community in the show notes. Thank you, babe,

990
00:45:15,239 --> 00:45:19,280
Speaker 3: I appreciate you. Thank you for having me, and congratulations

991
00:45:19,320 --> 00:45:22,040
Speaker 3: on the book. It's so awesome and I'm so excited

992
00:45:22,080 --> 00:45:28,719
Speaker 3: for you. Thank you, thank you for spending this time

993
00:45:28,760 --> 00:45:32,000
Speaker 3: with me on Love Life Sober. If today's conversation stirred

994
00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:34,520
Speaker 3: something in your heart, don't rush past it, take it

995
00:45:34,560 --> 00:45:38,160
Speaker 3: to prayer. If you're feeling ready for deeper connection and support,

996
00:45:38,440 --> 00:45:41,239
Speaker 3: I'd love to invite you into the Love Life Sober Community,

997
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:45,120
Speaker 3: a grace filled, shame free space where real connection grows

998
00:45:45,440 --> 00:45:48,399
Speaker 3: and lasting change takes root. You can find the link

999
00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:52,160
Speaker 3: to join us in the show notes. Love Life Sober

1000
00:45:52,239 --> 00:45:55,319
Speaker 3: is part of the Life Audio podcast network, where faith

1001
00:45:55,400 --> 00:45:58,320
Speaker 3: centered podcasts help you grow deeper in your walk with Christ.

1002
00:45:58,719 --> 00:46:02,640
Speaker 3: You can find more faiths centered podcasts at liveaudio dot com.

1003
00:46:03,080 --> 00:46:06,520
Speaker 3: Until next time, be gentle with yourself, stay curious, and

1004
00:46:06,560 --> 00:46:07,719
Speaker 3: trust God's promises.

1005
00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:09,600
Speaker 1: He has freedom waiting for you.