1 00:00:20,186 --> 00:00:23,246 Speaker 1: Hi, friend. I'm so glad you're here today. Let's learn 2 00:00:23,306 --> 00:00:26,886 Speaker 1: how to raise our kids to love God, respect authority, 3 00:00:27,226 --> 00:00:31,066 Speaker 1: and do what's right. Let's scroll less and live more. 4 00:00:31,456 --> 00:00:39,096 Speaker 1: I'm Arlene Pelican, and this is The Happy Home. Hello, friends. 5 00:00:39,415 --> 00:00:42,796 Speaker 1: Usually I welcome a guest, but today you and I 6 00:00:43,156 --> 00:00:46,626 Speaker 1: are going to have a heart-to-heart conversation. about technology, about 7 00:00:46,665 --> 00:00:49,326 Speaker 1: the phones in your house, about the tablets. Do you 8 00:00:49,406 --> 00:00:52,296 Speaker 1: love them? Are they doing a great job helping you 9 00:00:52,355 --> 00:00:54,935 Speaker 1: as a parent to grow closer to your children? Or 10 00:00:55,136 --> 00:01:00,075 Speaker 1: are you like Toy Story 5? That tablet is taking over. 11 00:01:00,176 --> 00:01:03,536 Speaker 1: We must do something about it. And some of you 12 00:01:03,556 --> 00:01:05,656 Speaker 1: who are new to the podcast, you may not know 13 00:01:05,736 --> 00:01:10,215 Speaker 1: that I also, besides interviewing some amazing guests, I also 14 00:01:10,336 --> 00:01:13,986 Speaker 1: speak and write. I have 10 books. that are published 15 00:01:14,126 --> 00:01:17,546 Speaker 1: and they are about things like screen kids, making marriage easier, 16 00:01:17,646 --> 00:01:20,795 Speaker 1: parents rising. And I'm super excited to have this heart 17 00:01:20,836 --> 00:01:25,056 Speaker 1: to heart with you because book number 11 is coming out. 18 00:01:25,575 --> 00:01:29,375 Speaker 1: But what is very special and kind of crazy about 19 00:01:29,416 --> 00:01:34,506 Speaker 1: this book is it's going to be tap the microphone free, free. 20 00:01:34,786 --> 00:01:38,185 Speaker 1: Like it's not an ebook. It is a print book 21 00:01:39,006 --> 00:01:42,946 Speaker 1: and you can order it for free. I know it 22 00:01:43,465 --> 00:01:48,326 Speaker 1: comes out on September 29th and you can pre-order it 23 00:01:48,526 --> 00:01:55,196 Speaker 1: right now at techresetbook.com while you're thinking about it, techresetbook.com. 24 00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:57,256 Speaker 1: That link will be in the show notes. The book 25 00:01:57,316 --> 00:02:02,516 Speaker 1: is called The Great Tech Reset, Reclaiming Real Life for 26 00:02:02,616 --> 00:02:06,486 Speaker 1: Christian Families. This is free to you because of the 27 00:02:06,526 --> 00:02:12,226 Speaker 1: generations and generous donations that have been given to Summit Ministries, 28 00:02:12,746 --> 00:02:15,356 Speaker 1: who is publishing this book. So I want to give 29 00:02:15,396 --> 00:02:17,936 Speaker 1: you a bit of the backstory of the book that 30 00:02:18,016 --> 00:02:20,796 Speaker 1: most people will not hear unless they listen to this podcast, 31 00:02:21,396 --> 00:02:25,856 Speaker 1: and then share our family testimony around screens, tell you 32 00:02:25,996 --> 00:02:30,506 Speaker 1: kind of three big lies that people are believing about 33 00:02:30,546 --> 00:02:33,006 Speaker 1: screen time in our kids, And then give you a 34 00:02:33,126 --> 00:02:36,946 Speaker 1: few tools to begin resetting the technology in your home. 35 00:02:37,166 --> 00:02:41,856 Speaker 1: So let's start with why. Why does this even matter? Well, 36 00:02:42,756 --> 00:02:46,095 Speaker 1: almost ad nauseum, maybe every other day in the news, 37 00:02:46,996 --> 00:02:49,536 Speaker 1: you'll read a story like about research, right? 145% increase 38 00:02:49,576 --> 00:02:55,266 Speaker 1: in teen girl depression since 2010. when we started using 39 00:02:55,305 --> 00:02:57,065 Speaker 1: phones and social media, a 161% increase for boys for depression, 40 00:02:57,085 --> 00:02:58,686 Speaker 1: anxiety up 134% for college students since 2010, 15% of 41 00:02:58,726 --> 00:03:01,876 Speaker 1: boys ages 18 to 24 addicted to video games. Our 42 00:03:01,925 --> 00:03:04,316 Speaker 1: kids are not learning for the first time in like 43 00:03:16,925 --> 00:03:20,786 Speaker 1: hundreds of years, every generation gets kind of a little smarter, right? 44 00:03:21,305 --> 00:03:24,446 Speaker 1: But for the first time, the test scores, the international 45 00:03:24,486 --> 00:03:27,465 Speaker 1: test scores for things like PISA are showing for the 46 00:03:27,526 --> 00:03:32,896 Speaker 1: first time, we are declining. Like what kids know, it's declining. 47 00:03:32,976 --> 00:03:35,116 Speaker 1: And that's the first time because we always become more 48 00:03:35,156 --> 00:03:39,436 Speaker 1: knowledgeable for every generation. So we need to understand, wait, 49 00:03:39,456 --> 00:03:43,036 Speaker 1: our AI might be getting a whole lot smarter, but 50 00:03:43,136 --> 00:03:47,336 Speaker 1: our kids do not know how to read, right? 69% 51 00:03:47,336 --> 00:03:52,946 Speaker 1: of fourth graders and 70% of eighth graders cannot read 52 00:03:53,236 --> 00:03:56,886 Speaker 1: at grade level. So my friends, we know this. We 53 00:03:56,946 --> 00:03:59,726 Speaker 1: know this is in the mix. And that's a lot 54 00:03:59,766 --> 00:04:02,446 Speaker 1: of why I wanted to write this book to address 55 00:04:02,506 --> 00:04:05,866 Speaker 1: this again. 2020, I wrote Screen Kids. And you know, 56 00:04:05,906 --> 00:04:08,746 Speaker 1: God is so amazing how he sets things up. I 57 00:04:08,866 --> 00:04:11,876 Speaker 1: have been running a conference called the Parents Rising Conference 58 00:04:11,916 --> 00:04:13,916 Speaker 1: in my hometown in San Diego, and it took a 59 00:04:13,956 --> 00:04:16,476 Speaker 1: lot of time to plan it. And it was amazing. 60 00:04:16,496 --> 00:04:18,156 Speaker 1: I had a great time doing it. The first year 61 00:04:18,196 --> 00:04:21,356 Speaker 1: we had Gary Chapman and Sally Burke from Moms in Prayer, 62 00:04:21,436 --> 00:04:24,226 Speaker 1: Pam and Bill Farrell. The second year, which was last year, 63 00:04:24,266 --> 00:04:27,026 Speaker 1: we had Sissy Goff and David Thomas and myself. It 64 00:04:27,066 --> 00:04:31,606 Speaker 1: was amazing. But I just felt like for that third year, 65 00:04:32,396 --> 00:04:35,255 Speaker 1: that the Lord released me, like, it's okay, you don't 66 00:04:35,296 --> 00:04:37,226 Speaker 1: have to plan this again. And I felt great peace 67 00:04:37,286 --> 00:04:40,586 Speaker 1: about it. Like, okay, maybe the Lord has a different project. Okay, 68 00:04:40,606 --> 00:04:44,766 Speaker 1: you guys, the very same day that I say to God, okay, God, 69 00:04:44,806 --> 00:04:47,506 Speaker 1: I think I'm sensing you're telling me not to do 70 00:04:47,546 --> 00:04:50,886 Speaker 1: the Parents Rising Conference again. That same day, I get 71 00:04:50,906 --> 00:04:54,526 Speaker 1: a call from Dr. Kathy Cook, who many of you know, 72 00:04:54,546 --> 00:04:58,455 Speaker 1: a beloved speaker and author and Kathy calls me and 73 00:04:58,516 --> 00:05:00,916 Speaker 1: she says, Arlene, I think there's a book project that 74 00:05:00,936 --> 00:05:03,136 Speaker 1: you should know about. And so she puts me in 75 00:05:03,176 --> 00:05:07,166 Speaker 1: touch with Summit Ministries and fast forward all that. Here 76 00:05:07,206 --> 00:05:09,106 Speaker 1: we go. And now we have a book. So I've 77 00:05:09,166 --> 00:05:12,426 Speaker 1: worked with Summit Ministries instead of planning and putting that 78 00:05:12,445 --> 00:05:14,486 Speaker 1: time in the conference, which the Lord knew I needed 79 00:05:14,526 --> 00:05:17,695 Speaker 1: that time now to write this book. And I am 80 00:05:17,755 --> 00:05:21,676 Speaker 1: just so thrilled to partner with Summit Ministries. My kids, 81 00:05:21,936 --> 00:05:25,695 Speaker 1: both Ethan and Noel, went to Summit's camp in the 82 00:05:25,736 --> 00:05:29,056 Speaker 1: summertime before they go to college. They went to the 83 00:05:29,156 --> 00:05:33,236 Speaker 1: two-week worldview camp so that they can understand the truth 84 00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:39,316 Speaker 1: about creation, abortion, socialism, all these different things that they're 85 00:05:39,336 --> 00:05:42,576 Speaker 1: going to hear in college. So helpful. So I love 86 00:05:42,596 --> 00:05:44,736 Speaker 1: Summit Ministries. So when Summit was like, you want to 87 00:05:44,755 --> 00:05:48,586 Speaker 1: write a book together? I'm like, yes, I do. And 88 00:05:48,726 --> 00:05:52,046 Speaker 1: I feel like it's God's timing because my youngest, so 89 00:05:52,086 --> 00:05:55,065 Speaker 1: I have one, Ethan is a college graduate who's working 90 00:05:55,106 --> 00:05:59,696 Speaker 1: full time. Noelle is our senior in college, and you 91 00:05:59,716 --> 00:06:02,916 Speaker 1: will be hearing from her next week on the pod. 92 00:06:03,695 --> 00:06:07,236 Speaker 1: And our youngest, Lucy, is a senior in high school. 93 00:06:07,296 --> 00:06:09,526 Speaker 1: So I feel like what an exciting thing to be 94 00:06:09,565 --> 00:06:11,546 Speaker 1: able to bring this book into the world and still 95 00:06:11,586 --> 00:06:15,226 Speaker 1: be able to tell you, yes. I have a senior 96 00:06:15,505 --> 00:06:19,366 Speaker 1: in high school and she does not have social media, 97 00:06:19,966 --> 00:06:24,036 Speaker 1: nor does she have a phone that she now I will. 98 00:06:24,156 --> 00:06:27,236 Speaker 1: So that kind of puts out, you know, how did 99 00:06:27,276 --> 00:06:30,135 Speaker 1: this book come about? And then let's roll into our 100 00:06:30,176 --> 00:06:35,336 Speaker 1: personal testimony. You know, our kids grew up with all 101 00:06:35,376 --> 00:06:40,316 Speaker 1: their other friends having phones. Video games, social media, phones. 102 00:06:40,556 --> 00:06:43,726 Speaker 1: I remember sending my kid Ethan to seventh grade. He's 103 00:06:43,766 --> 00:06:47,366 Speaker 1: our oldest and he biked into school. It's probably two 104 00:06:47,406 --> 00:06:50,526 Speaker 1: or three miles without a phone. And I remember one 105 00:06:50,586 --> 00:06:54,866 Speaker 1: mom saying, what? You let your child in Southern California 106 00:06:55,046 --> 00:06:59,765 Speaker 1: bike to school without a phone? And I'm like, yep. Okay. Right. 107 00:07:00,166 --> 00:07:04,666 Speaker 1: Because guess what? If something happens to him, okay, that 108 00:07:04,706 --> 00:07:07,306 Speaker 1: is a risk. That's true. But wouldn't it be a 109 00:07:07,406 --> 00:07:10,366 Speaker 1: greater risk, this is what our thinking was, if he 110 00:07:10,416 --> 00:07:12,936 Speaker 1: went to school with a smartphone? So I think, okay, good. 111 00:07:12,976 --> 00:07:14,576 Speaker 1: He can call me if he has a flat tire 112 00:07:14,616 --> 00:07:18,016 Speaker 1: or something or gets abducted. But guess what? What's the 113 00:07:18,056 --> 00:07:20,836 Speaker 1: chance that he's going to get abducted on the way 114 00:07:20,876 --> 00:07:23,706 Speaker 1: to school in the physical world? That's a pretty small chance. 115 00:07:23,796 --> 00:07:26,556 Speaker 1: It's a chance, but it's pretty small. What's the chance 116 00:07:26,596 --> 00:07:29,756 Speaker 1: he's going to look at pornography, stumble, not even look 117 00:07:29,816 --> 00:07:33,246 Speaker 1: for it, but be offered on his phone pornography and 118 00:07:33,306 --> 00:07:36,526 Speaker 1: that begin like a lifelong struggle for him? What's the 119 00:07:36,546 --> 00:07:40,466 Speaker 1: chance of that happening? Oh, that's a much bigger chance, right? 120 00:07:41,346 --> 00:07:45,396 Speaker 1: So these kinds of things made us think, you know what? 121 00:07:45,596 --> 00:07:48,296 Speaker 1: We will be the weird ones and our children will 122 00:07:48,356 --> 00:07:52,186 Speaker 1: not have phones in elementary school. in middle school, and 123 00:07:52,226 --> 00:07:54,266 Speaker 1: in most of high school. They will not go on 124 00:07:54,306 --> 00:07:56,686 Speaker 1: social media and they will not do video games. So 125 00:07:56,706 --> 00:07:59,866 Speaker 1: those were the three things that we avoided because we 126 00:08:00,166 --> 00:08:05,016 Speaker 1: knew those things in particular, video games, social media, having 127 00:08:05,056 --> 00:08:08,636 Speaker 1: your own personal device, that is what can make you 128 00:08:08,676 --> 00:08:13,216 Speaker 1: very addicted. Now, We are very not anti-technology. Look at us. 129 00:08:13,296 --> 00:08:15,636 Speaker 1: We are talking right now. We are having a heart-to-heart 130 00:08:15,676 --> 00:08:19,806 Speaker 1: because of technology. My daughter, Lucy, will edit this podcast 131 00:08:19,966 --> 00:08:21,806 Speaker 1: and will be the one to push it on the 132 00:08:21,846 --> 00:08:26,406 Speaker 1: platform online, right? So my son, Ethan, he 3D printed 133 00:08:26,466 --> 00:08:29,766 Speaker 1: Nerf guns in high school. My daughter, Noelle, she took 134 00:08:29,806 --> 00:08:32,976 Speaker 1: all sorts of art lessons online and learned how to draw. 135 00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:36,036 Speaker 1: So we are not anti-tech. We get it. This is 136 00:08:36,236 --> 00:08:40,246 Speaker 1: pretty amazing what you're able to accomplish through technology. But 137 00:08:41,166 --> 00:08:44,155 Speaker 1: when it's in the pocket of a child or a 138 00:08:44,216 --> 00:08:49,226 Speaker 1: teenager with a growing brain, developing brain, developing soul. that 139 00:08:49,246 --> 00:08:52,426 Speaker 1: there are way more negatives than positives. And so when 140 00:08:52,466 --> 00:08:55,226 Speaker 1: you get the book, my book, The Great Tech Reset, 141 00:08:55,726 --> 00:08:59,356 Speaker 1: you're going to find out all about like the ABCD harms. 142 00:08:59,436 --> 00:09:04,556 Speaker 1: I'll explain what those ABCD harms are that every parent 143 00:09:05,076 --> 00:09:11,546 Speaker 1: must know. So Great Tech Reset is the book and techresetbook.com. Okay. 144 00:09:11,566 --> 00:09:13,786 Speaker 1: So make sure you order it because it's free and 145 00:09:13,806 --> 00:09:16,696 Speaker 1: it will get mailed to you. So our family story 146 00:09:17,196 --> 00:09:19,676 Speaker 1: is that we decided to be the weird ones in 147 00:09:19,736 --> 00:09:24,676 Speaker 1: Southern California and not have these things. So let's, let's 148 00:09:24,776 --> 00:09:27,596 Speaker 1: now think, cause I can hear your questions and I 149 00:09:27,636 --> 00:09:30,156 Speaker 1: get them. I get them in over email. I get 150 00:09:30,196 --> 00:09:33,656 Speaker 1: them when I go out speaking. Always I'm asked something 151 00:09:33,696 --> 00:09:38,766 Speaker 1: like this, but how did your children make friends? Like 152 00:09:38,796 --> 00:09:43,406 Speaker 1: how did they socialize? Because this is how people socialize. Okay. 153 00:09:43,996 --> 00:09:48,116 Speaker 1: So the lie is your child needs to be on 154 00:09:48,136 --> 00:09:51,986 Speaker 1: video games, needs to be on social media in order 155 00:09:52,046 --> 00:09:56,866 Speaker 1: to make connections. So let's take a child who is 156 00:09:56,926 --> 00:10:00,746 Speaker 1: given social media. And if you're listening and you've experienced this, 157 00:10:00,906 --> 00:10:04,035 Speaker 1: see if I'm wrong or if I'm right. So your 158 00:10:04,276 --> 00:10:07,156 Speaker 1: sixth grader, seventh grader, eighth grader girls begging you, please 159 00:10:07,176 --> 00:10:09,736 Speaker 1: give me a phone because I'm so left out. Please 160 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:11,936 Speaker 1: give this to me so I can... be included, so 161 00:10:11,956 --> 00:10:13,766 Speaker 1: I can see when the youth group is meeting, so 162 00:10:13,796 --> 00:10:15,806 Speaker 1: I can see when my little group is meeting, like 163 00:10:15,826 --> 00:10:17,826 Speaker 1: I really need this. Okay, so you give it to them. 164 00:10:18,956 --> 00:10:22,876 Speaker 1: After a week, a month, a few months, do you find, oh, wow, 165 00:10:22,976 --> 00:10:26,996 Speaker 1: my girl is so much happier. She feels so much 166 00:10:27,056 --> 00:10:30,896 Speaker 1: more connected. Her friendships are so much richer. I have 167 00:10:30,936 --> 00:10:33,176 Speaker 1: yet to hear a story like that because you know 168 00:10:33,196 --> 00:10:37,406 Speaker 1: what happens. You sit in your room for hours alone. 169 00:10:38,066 --> 00:10:41,686 Speaker 1: The average teen is sitting five hours a day alone 170 00:10:42,386 --> 00:10:47,156 Speaker 1: with their device on social media, including YouTube. Okay. So 171 00:10:47,756 --> 00:10:50,556 Speaker 1: how is that? That's a lie that that's making you 172 00:10:50,596 --> 00:10:55,296 Speaker 1: more social. That is making you, you know, check boxes 173 00:10:55,636 --> 00:10:58,496 Speaker 1: and hit the like button and scroll through and have 174 00:10:58,536 --> 00:11:02,666 Speaker 1: all sorts of feelings and have a knowledge that of 175 00:11:02,706 --> 00:11:05,566 Speaker 1: someone like you know about them, but you've never even 176 00:11:05,756 --> 00:11:08,436 Speaker 1: met them in real life, or you've never talked to 177 00:11:08,496 --> 00:11:11,906 Speaker 1: them for more than five minutes. So I would argue 178 00:11:11,926 --> 00:11:14,886 Speaker 1: that if you want your children really to make friends, 179 00:11:15,406 --> 00:11:18,446 Speaker 1: Don't let them have social media because guess what happens? 180 00:11:18,566 --> 00:11:21,696 Speaker 1: Now they have to actually have a conversation in real life. 181 00:11:21,716 --> 00:11:23,516 Speaker 1: They have to talk to each other. They have to 182 00:11:23,676 --> 00:11:26,236 Speaker 1: play basketball together. They have to walk around the block together. 183 00:11:26,256 --> 00:11:28,036 Speaker 1: They have to go skateboarding together. They have to go 184 00:11:28,176 --> 00:11:32,826 Speaker 1: do something together. And that will be way that that 185 00:11:32,886 --> 00:11:35,786 Speaker 1: is true friendship. Okay. So push back against that and 186 00:11:35,886 --> 00:11:38,746 Speaker 1: try to prove me wrong. Try to find an example 187 00:11:38,806 --> 00:11:42,396 Speaker 1: of a kid who started on social media or who 188 00:11:42,426 --> 00:11:47,096 Speaker 1: started video gaming and then their friendships just flourished. Like 189 00:11:47,136 --> 00:11:51,536 Speaker 1: the kinds of friends that have your back, that are loyal, 190 00:11:51,876 --> 00:11:56,556 Speaker 1: that are moral, that you'll still have in 20 years. Okay. Right. 191 00:11:56,656 --> 00:12:00,976 Speaker 1: Because if your kid has 500 followers, but no one 192 00:12:00,996 --> 00:12:04,136 Speaker 1: to visit them when they're sick or no one that 193 00:12:04,156 --> 00:12:06,976 Speaker 1: they'll know in 10 years, like what is the worth 194 00:12:07,016 --> 00:12:11,326 Speaker 1: of that? It'd be much more worthwhile. to have two friends, 195 00:12:11,706 --> 00:12:16,446 Speaker 1: have no phone, be the social pariah. But, you know, 196 00:12:16,466 --> 00:12:18,936 Speaker 1: my daughter, Noelle, who did not have a phone all 197 00:12:18,976 --> 00:12:22,816 Speaker 1: the way through school until her senior year, May of 198 00:12:22,856 --> 00:12:25,136 Speaker 1: her senior years when she got her phone so she 199 00:12:25,156 --> 00:12:27,236 Speaker 1: could get everybody's number to be able to stay in 200 00:12:27,256 --> 00:12:29,746 Speaker 1: touch with them. So May of her senior year. And 201 00:12:29,766 --> 00:12:31,226 Speaker 1: she's going to talk to you more next week on 202 00:12:31,246 --> 00:12:33,706 Speaker 1: the pod. But I like saying on the pod. It 203 00:12:33,766 --> 00:12:38,366 Speaker 1: makes me feel so cool, right? On the podcast. Okay. So, 204 00:12:39,006 --> 00:12:42,286 Speaker 1: but guess what? When she comes home from summer break 205 00:12:42,506 --> 00:12:47,606 Speaker 1: from college, who does she see? She sees friends from kindergarten. 206 00:12:47,626 --> 00:12:50,006 Speaker 1: They are still friends. They go out to dinner. They 207 00:12:50,046 --> 00:12:53,116 Speaker 1: go out to do things. She has her school friends 208 00:12:53,156 --> 00:12:56,496 Speaker 1: from high school, a group of four that she does 209 00:12:56,546 --> 00:13:01,776 Speaker 1: things with. She makes friends and she's kept friends over 210 00:13:01,836 --> 00:13:05,196 Speaker 1: the years because the kinds of friends she had really 211 00:13:05,296 --> 00:13:08,446 Speaker 1: knew her. They weren't just like following her because, oh, 212 00:13:08,466 --> 00:13:12,106 Speaker 1: you're popular right now on Instagram. They were true friends. 213 00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:15,366 Speaker 1: So do not believe the lie that my child needs 214 00:13:15,426 --> 00:13:18,266 Speaker 1: this to make friends. That is a lie. All right, 215 00:13:18,286 --> 00:13:22,066 Speaker 1: here's the next lie. Your kids will hate you. If 216 00:13:22,106 --> 00:13:27,166 Speaker 1: you limit their technology, they will hate you. Not only 217 00:13:27,186 --> 00:13:30,286 Speaker 1: will they hate you, they will go behind your back 218 00:13:30,786 --> 00:13:33,726 Speaker 1: and they will do things like way worse than if 219 00:13:33,746 --> 00:13:35,346 Speaker 1: you were to let them do it in the first place. 220 00:13:36,566 --> 00:13:38,506 Speaker 1: You hear this a lot, right? It sounds good. I 221 00:13:38,686 --> 00:13:40,526 Speaker 1: don't want my kids to hate me. I don't want 222 00:13:40,646 --> 00:13:42,726 Speaker 1: my kids to go behind my back. I'd rather them 223 00:13:43,046 --> 00:13:46,946 Speaker 1: do it in my presence safely than do it later. 224 00:13:47,246 --> 00:13:52,426 Speaker 1: That's what you hear a lot. Okay. Your kids will 225 00:13:52,466 --> 00:13:57,466 Speaker 1: hate you. Is our job as parents to make popular 226 00:13:57,526 --> 00:14:00,366 Speaker 1: decisions all the time? You know, go to bed now 227 00:14:00,506 --> 00:14:02,626 Speaker 1: because you need to. Does that make your kids say, oh, 228 00:14:02,646 --> 00:14:05,096 Speaker 1: I love my mom so much? You know, you're not 229 00:14:05,136 --> 00:14:09,036 Speaker 1: allowed to play that, you know, super violent video game 230 00:14:09,076 --> 00:14:11,556 Speaker 1: with naked women in it. You know, your kids, of course, 231 00:14:11,576 --> 00:14:14,976 Speaker 1: they're going to disagree with you. So kids have disagreed 232 00:14:15,056 --> 00:14:19,446 Speaker 1: with parents forever, right? This is not a new thing. 233 00:14:20,066 --> 00:14:24,006 Speaker 1: I'm Gen X. Gen Xers, we slammed doors and we said, 234 00:14:24,046 --> 00:14:27,346 Speaker 1: you don't understand me. You're the meanest parent ever. Like 235 00:14:27,726 --> 00:14:30,876 Speaker 1: we did that too. So we first have to understand, 236 00:14:31,616 --> 00:14:34,756 Speaker 1: like I say, our kids need parents. They don't need 237 00:14:34,776 --> 00:14:39,486 Speaker 1: tall friends. Our kids need someone with backbone that we say, 238 00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:41,606 Speaker 1: child of mine, of course, I don't want you to 239 00:14:41,666 --> 00:14:45,546 Speaker 1: hate me. I love you, but I will endure your wrath. 240 00:14:46,186 --> 00:14:49,566 Speaker 1: I will endure you being so mad at me because 241 00:14:49,616 --> 00:14:52,336 Speaker 1: I want to protect you and because I care about you. 242 00:14:52,356 --> 00:14:55,516 Speaker 1: I mean, just think of, just if you have a 243 00:14:55,556 --> 00:14:58,926 Speaker 1: teenager right now who's really mad at you, Because you're 244 00:14:58,966 --> 00:15:01,286 Speaker 1: listening to this podcast and you're going to get my 245 00:15:01,326 --> 00:15:04,446 Speaker 1: book and you're going to say, oh, let's get those 246 00:15:04,526 --> 00:15:07,246 Speaker 1: phones out of the bedrooms. Oh, let's take a break 247 00:15:07,286 --> 00:15:10,566 Speaker 1: from TikTok for a month. Hey, that video game's really violent. 248 00:15:10,926 --> 00:15:14,636 Speaker 1: You become a monster. We're going to take that. Let's 249 00:15:14,656 --> 00:15:17,316 Speaker 1: take a pause on that for a month. Okay. So 250 00:15:17,336 --> 00:15:19,256 Speaker 1: you're going to say those kinds of things. And no 251 00:15:19,316 --> 00:15:22,896 Speaker 1: kid is going to say, wow, I'm so happy that 252 00:15:23,176 --> 00:15:25,196 Speaker 1: you've saved me, mom and dad. No, they're going to 253 00:15:25,216 --> 00:15:29,826 Speaker 1: be so mad at you. But guess what? When they 254 00:15:30,126 --> 00:15:35,546 Speaker 1: start sleeping again, when they start playing soccer again, what 255 00:15:35,586 --> 00:15:37,546 Speaker 1: they used to love, but they haven't done that anymore 256 00:15:37,586 --> 00:15:41,046 Speaker 1: since they found Fortnite, or they start seeing a friend 257 00:15:41,086 --> 00:15:44,946 Speaker 1: in real life and really getting love, like real love, 258 00:15:45,066 --> 00:15:50,386 Speaker 1: not just like AI companionship love, which is hollow and evil, right? 259 00:15:50,526 --> 00:15:53,276 Speaker 1: So as your kids get healthy, I don't think it'll 260 00:15:53,306 --> 00:15:55,496 Speaker 1: take very long for them to realize, you know, mom 261 00:15:55,536 --> 00:15:59,216 Speaker 1: or dad, I really hated that you gave this new 262 00:15:59,296 --> 00:16:02,936 Speaker 1: rule or that you like made me give you my 263 00:16:03,136 --> 00:16:06,156 Speaker 1: phone at night. But I have to admit, like, I 264 00:16:06,196 --> 00:16:08,576 Speaker 1: feel a lot better. I feel a lot better since 265 00:16:08,656 --> 00:16:12,736 Speaker 1: I started sleeping again. And you as the parent have 266 00:16:12,776 --> 00:16:16,886 Speaker 1: to have the wisdom to know I will risk being 267 00:16:17,006 --> 00:16:22,386 Speaker 1: hated now to be loved later. Let me say that again. 268 00:16:22,406 --> 00:16:29,296 Speaker 1: I will risk being hated now, making hard tech, unpopular decisions. 269 00:16:29,536 --> 00:16:33,756 Speaker 1: I will risk being hated now so that I will 270 00:16:33,796 --> 00:16:38,056 Speaker 1: be loved later. So that your kids, maybe it'll be 271 00:16:38,076 --> 00:16:40,246 Speaker 1: a month, maybe it'll be five years, maybe it'll be 272 00:16:40,246 --> 00:16:42,726 Speaker 1: 10 years when they finally appreciate and say, you know what? 273 00:16:43,446 --> 00:16:45,966 Speaker 1: Everyone was going sideways in high school, but you kept 274 00:16:46,006 --> 00:16:48,486 Speaker 1: me from going sideways. And even though I didn't want 275 00:16:48,926 --> 00:16:51,086 Speaker 1: to listen to you, thank you. I mean, that day 276 00:16:51,116 --> 00:16:58,896 Speaker 1: will come. Or you take the opposite of that. You 277 00:16:58,936 --> 00:17:03,736 Speaker 1: can be loved now. My mom and dad, they're so cool. 278 00:17:03,776 --> 00:17:06,326 Speaker 1: They let me do anything I want. My mom lets 279 00:17:06,366 --> 00:17:08,406 Speaker 1: me do that. My mom lets me do that. My 280 00:17:08,446 --> 00:17:10,845 Speaker 1: dad doesn't care. I stay up all night and I'm 281 00:17:10,926 --> 00:17:13,466 Speaker 1: on my phone. They don't tell me what to do. 282 00:17:13,526 --> 00:17:15,556 Speaker 1: I get to do whatever. And so it's, you know, 283 00:17:15,656 --> 00:17:17,735 Speaker 1: you have very little friction because they basically do what 284 00:17:17,776 --> 00:17:20,536 Speaker 1: they want. Guess what? A couple of years down the line, 285 00:17:21,776 --> 00:17:23,856 Speaker 1: They're going to say, mom, dad, why didn't you stop 286 00:17:23,896 --> 00:17:26,955 Speaker 1: me from doing this? Mom, dad, I am video gaming 287 00:17:27,176 --> 00:17:28,955 Speaker 1: in my basement and I can't get a job. Why 288 00:17:28,995 --> 00:17:32,116 Speaker 1: did you not tell me about this? Right? You can 289 00:17:32,156 --> 00:17:38,956 Speaker 1: be loved now and hated later when your kids say, 290 00:17:39,955 --> 00:17:44,796 Speaker 1: why didn't you keep me from this harmful substance? Right? 291 00:17:45,096 --> 00:17:49,635 Speaker 1: Oh my goodness. Okay. And again, hug. hug over the microphone, 292 00:17:49,656 --> 00:17:52,535 Speaker 1: hug it out. My friends, I'm not saying this for 293 00:17:52,596 --> 00:17:57,245 Speaker 1: condemnation or guilt. I am saying this with all the 294 00:17:57,285 --> 00:18:01,245 Speaker 1: love in my heart to say, please take stock of 295 00:18:01,326 --> 00:18:05,246 Speaker 1: what's happening in your home with technology. Don't be afraid 296 00:18:05,515 --> 00:18:10,035 Speaker 1: to do the unpopular thing now to protect your child. 297 00:18:10,176 --> 00:18:13,296 Speaker 1: One of my daughters said once, mom, why does your 298 00:18:13,356 --> 00:18:18,816 Speaker 1: generation not do anything to stop my generation from being addicted. 299 00:18:18,836 --> 00:18:23,315 Speaker 1: It's like, wow. So this Great Tech Reset, let it 300 00:18:23,356 --> 00:18:25,875 Speaker 1: wake us up to say, you know, as much as 301 00:18:25,896 --> 00:18:28,255 Speaker 1: it's in my power, just like a coach gets new 302 00:18:28,316 --> 00:18:31,095 Speaker 1: information and changes the play, because you can feel like, oh, 303 00:18:31,116 --> 00:18:34,705 Speaker 1: I'm a hypocrite. I bought you that phone. I bought 304 00:18:34,745 --> 00:18:37,006 Speaker 1: you that game. And now I'm telling you to take 305 00:18:37,046 --> 00:18:39,546 Speaker 1: it away. You feel like a hypocrite. But you can say, 306 00:18:39,586 --> 00:18:43,646 Speaker 1: you know what? I've been watching you. And your smile 307 00:18:43,725 --> 00:18:46,736 Speaker 1: is gone. And you're not the same kid you were 308 00:18:46,775 --> 00:18:49,136 Speaker 1: a year ago. And I mourn for that because I 309 00:18:49,176 --> 00:18:51,896 Speaker 1: want more for you. And child of mine, I was wrong. 310 00:18:52,735 --> 00:18:55,655 Speaker 1: I've learned new information. I was wrong to let you 311 00:18:55,696 --> 00:18:58,376 Speaker 1: have that social media. It is wrecking your life. It 312 00:18:58,436 --> 00:19:02,336 Speaker 1: is wrecking your mental health. I was wrong. Please forgive me. 313 00:19:03,196 --> 00:19:06,855 Speaker 1: And let's journey together. Let's stay off of TikTok and 314 00:19:06,896 --> 00:19:09,116 Speaker 1: social media, both of us, for one month. And let's 315 00:19:09,156 --> 00:19:13,436 Speaker 1: do that together. And again, they're not going to go, oh, wow, mom, dad, 316 00:19:13,936 --> 00:19:16,455 Speaker 1: you've saved me. No, they're going to be really mad 317 00:19:16,495 --> 00:19:21,016 Speaker 1: at first. But then when they feel healthier and their 318 00:19:21,096 --> 00:19:23,816 Speaker 1: life starts coming back to them, they will be grateful. 319 00:19:23,955 --> 00:19:26,955 Speaker 1: So do not believe the lie. Your kids will hate you. 320 00:19:28,096 --> 00:19:31,616 Speaker 1: You might be unpopular for a minute, but they will 321 00:19:31,656 --> 00:19:35,205 Speaker 1: come to love you for your decision. Okay. And then 322 00:19:35,386 --> 00:19:38,746 Speaker 1: the third lie about technology, which is kind of related. 323 00:19:38,846 --> 00:19:43,196 Speaker 1: It's too late. it's too late. You're way too deep. 324 00:19:43,936 --> 00:19:47,275 Speaker 1: You're way too deep in. It is too late. In 325 00:19:47,316 --> 00:19:49,355 Speaker 1: my book, The Great Tech Reset, which you can get 326 00:19:49,396 --> 00:19:52,076 Speaker 1: from free. Are you getting that, guys? Okay. On the website, 327 00:19:52,136 --> 00:19:54,775 Speaker 1: order that for free. Hard copy, sent to your house. 328 00:19:55,775 --> 00:19:59,286 Speaker 1: In the book, I talk about this father and this son, Marcus, 329 00:19:59,886 --> 00:20:03,186 Speaker 1: the dad, and Adrian, the fifth grade boy. And the mom, 330 00:20:03,485 --> 00:20:06,556 Speaker 1: which many moms do, realized something is wrong with our son. 331 00:20:06,576 --> 00:20:09,755 Speaker 1: He's acting weird. Like he plays the video games and 332 00:20:09,775 --> 00:20:12,376 Speaker 1: he's starting to act strange. But the dad was, you know, 333 00:20:12,416 --> 00:20:14,605 Speaker 1: it took a little bit for the dad to see it. 334 00:20:14,696 --> 00:20:18,215 Speaker 1: But once the dad did see it, it was like, oh, 335 00:20:19,025 --> 00:20:21,406 Speaker 1: something is wrong. And you'll read the book. And basically 336 00:20:21,465 --> 00:20:24,846 Speaker 1: they realized you have like, like you're acting like an addict. 337 00:20:25,606 --> 00:20:28,306 Speaker 1: Like you want these in-app purchases, you know, for your 338 00:20:28,326 --> 00:20:31,646 Speaker 1: game and you're just going crazy over it. It's a 339 00:20:31,686 --> 00:20:33,966 Speaker 1: cute little game, but just like you have to have 340 00:20:33,985 --> 00:20:36,605 Speaker 1: the money. It's like $ 3. 99. It's like nothing, but it's 341 00:20:36,626 --> 00:20:38,525 Speaker 1: like you have to have it or you can't go on. 342 00:20:39,086 --> 00:20:40,926 Speaker 1: And the dad realized like, wait a minute, you are 343 00:20:41,025 --> 00:20:43,846 Speaker 1: acting like an addict and realized, oh my word, you 344 00:20:43,926 --> 00:20:46,786 Speaker 1: are addicted to this game and it's causing all sorts 345 00:20:46,826 --> 00:20:51,545 Speaker 1: of anxiety in your life. And he literally took off work. 346 00:20:52,656 --> 00:20:55,115 Speaker 1: so that he could be with his son from the 347 00:20:55,156 --> 00:20:59,215 Speaker 1: time he got from after school till bedtime. And this 348 00:20:59,616 --> 00:21:04,876 Speaker 1: father literally put his physical body in between his son 349 00:21:04,896 --> 00:21:08,396 Speaker 1: and the tablet, his son and the phone, his son 350 00:21:08,426 --> 00:21:11,166 Speaker 1: and a gaming console. And he did that. And you've 351 00:21:11,205 --> 00:21:13,266 Speaker 1: got to read the book and the story because he 352 00:21:13,406 --> 00:21:16,505 Speaker 1: fought for the health of his son. And my friends, 353 00:21:16,566 --> 00:21:19,046 Speaker 1: whether you have a fifth grader, a 15 year old, 354 00:21:19,106 --> 00:21:23,465 Speaker 1: even an 18 year old, it is not It's never 355 00:21:23,525 --> 00:21:26,686 Speaker 1: too late because let's say it is too late. It's 356 00:21:26,705 --> 00:21:29,546 Speaker 1: too late. You can't fix it. It's too late. Like 357 00:21:29,826 --> 00:21:32,346 Speaker 1: she's too far gone on social media. He's too far 358 00:21:32,386 --> 00:21:35,186 Speaker 1: gone on the video. It is too late. What is 359 00:21:35,205 --> 00:21:38,265 Speaker 1: the hope for humanity if it is too late to 360 00:21:38,326 --> 00:21:41,495 Speaker 1: fix things? So that means if I'm a chain smoker 361 00:21:41,696 --> 00:21:44,776 Speaker 1: at 40, it's too late. No, I could get help 362 00:21:45,126 --> 00:21:48,016 Speaker 1: and I could change. You mean as a 50 year old, 363 00:21:48,156 --> 00:21:52,005 Speaker 1: I couldn't repair a relationship I have? No, no. I 364 00:21:52,086 --> 00:21:56,045 Speaker 1: could go back and I could ask for forgiveness. You know, like, yes, 365 00:21:56,106 --> 00:22:00,626 Speaker 1: it's harder. It's not easy to change, but it's never 366 00:22:01,106 --> 00:22:05,995 Speaker 1: too late to make a change, to make amends, to 367 00:22:06,116 --> 00:22:10,035 Speaker 1: try to repair a relationship, especially if the kid is 368 00:22:10,076 --> 00:22:13,596 Speaker 1: still under your roof, right? It's not like, it's like, okay, 369 00:22:13,616 --> 00:22:16,946 Speaker 1: I'm battling with a 12-year-old or a 15-year-old or a 17-year-old. 370 00:22:17,025 --> 00:22:19,486 Speaker 1: I mean, you can do this, mom or dad. So 371 00:22:19,566 --> 00:22:23,226 Speaker 1: realize it is not too late. And yes, maybe there 372 00:22:23,265 --> 00:22:26,306 Speaker 1: are certain things in the brain and in the soul 373 00:22:26,485 --> 00:22:30,386 Speaker 1: that are really, really ingrained over someone. Yes, you know, 374 00:22:30,426 --> 00:22:37,345 Speaker 1: that is true. But what if you got back, hey, friend, 375 00:22:38,306 --> 00:22:42,326 Speaker 1: you know, like your teenager buddy, you know, I miss you. 376 00:22:43,245 --> 00:22:47,025 Speaker 1: I'm busy with work. You know, you're always busy, you know, 377 00:22:47,066 --> 00:22:49,306 Speaker 1: with your phone or with your friends or whatever. And 378 00:22:49,326 --> 00:22:51,905 Speaker 1: I miss you. So I'm going to start taking you 379 00:22:51,926 --> 00:22:55,406 Speaker 1: to pancake breakfast once a month on Saturday morning. Just 380 00:22:55,446 --> 00:22:58,546 Speaker 1: you and me, we're going to pancake breakfast. And that's 381 00:22:58,566 --> 00:23:01,126 Speaker 1: the only thing different you do after listening to this podcast. 382 00:23:01,386 --> 00:23:04,245 Speaker 1: Guess what? When your kid graduates out of your home, 383 00:23:04,326 --> 00:23:07,046 Speaker 1: they will see a pancake and they will be like, 384 00:23:07,275 --> 00:23:10,666 Speaker 1: you know what, my dad, my senior year. I don't 385 00:23:10,686 --> 00:23:13,086 Speaker 1: know why, but he started taking me to pancake breakfast. 386 00:23:13,426 --> 00:23:19,076 Speaker 1: And he'll remember that. You can reclaim real life with 387 00:23:19,116 --> 00:23:21,576 Speaker 1: your family. It is never too late. You can say, 388 00:23:21,636 --> 00:23:25,296 Speaker 1: let's get the meal time back. Let's get a screen-free 389 00:23:25,396 --> 00:23:29,775 Speaker 1: meal in place. Let's take a walk after dinner and 390 00:23:29,836 --> 00:23:32,906 Speaker 1: just talk about the day and just walk for 10 minutes. 391 00:23:33,086 --> 00:23:37,086 Speaker 1: These are very little rhythms that you can do. It's 392 00:23:37,346 --> 00:23:41,515 Speaker 1: never too late. In my book, I will give you plans, 393 00:23:41,955 --> 00:23:45,236 Speaker 1: the platinum plan, the gold plan, and the silver plan. 394 00:23:46,035 --> 00:23:48,696 Speaker 1: These especially work if your children are young and you 395 00:23:48,715 --> 00:23:51,386 Speaker 1: adopt them and you plan for them. But let's say 396 00:23:51,446 --> 00:23:53,426 Speaker 1: you feel like it's too late. I can't do those. 397 00:23:53,546 --> 00:23:56,066 Speaker 1: It's not, actually. You could say, you know what, child 398 00:23:56,126 --> 00:23:58,725 Speaker 1: of mine, look at this book. Look at these statistics. 399 00:23:59,346 --> 00:24:01,086 Speaker 1: We're going to go back to this plan. What do 400 00:24:01,126 --> 00:24:05,146 Speaker 1: you think? You can. You can sometimes, as C.S. Lewis 401 00:24:05,186 --> 00:24:08,255 Speaker 1: says it so much more beautifully, But basically, sometimes the 402 00:24:08,275 --> 00:24:12,436 Speaker 1: way forward progress is backwards. Because if you're on the 403 00:24:12,495 --> 00:24:17,755 Speaker 1: wrong path, then progress doesn't mean keeping going on the 404 00:24:17,856 --> 00:24:21,376 Speaker 1: wrong path. It means going back to where you got 405 00:24:21,436 --> 00:24:25,275 Speaker 1: astray and starting a new path. That is progress. And 406 00:24:25,356 --> 00:24:26,856 Speaker 1: that's what I want you to get a hold of 407 00:24:26,936 --> 00:24:29,856 Speaker 1: that even though you're going a certain direction with your technology, 408 00:24:29,876 --> 00:24:31,436 Speaker 1: it doesn't mean you have to stay on that path. 409 00:24:31,495 --> 00:24:35,475 Speaker 1: For you, progress could be scaling it back. saying, hey, 410 00:24:35,515 --> 00:24:38,876 Speaker 1: let's go back to life before TikTok. Let's go back 411 00:24:38,985 --> 00:24:43,046 Speaker 1: to life before five hours of YouTube every night. Let's 412 00:24:43,066 --> 00:24:46,446 Speaker 1: go back. And so five hours of YouTube turns into 413 00:24:46,485 --> 00:24:49,545 Speaker 1: three hours and then it turns into one hour and 414 00:24:49,586 --> 00:24:51,966 Speaker 1: then it turns into nothing at night. And instead you're 415 00:24:51,985 --> 00:24:54,606 Speaker 1: shooting hoops or riding bikes or finding out what your 416 00:24:54,646 --> 00:24:57,626 Speaker 1: kid likes and making those memories before they leave your home. 417 00:24:57,846 --> 00:25:01,396 Speaker 1: It is never too late. So my friends, hopefully I've 418 00:25:01,416 --> 00:25:06,036 Speaker 1: debunked those three leading questions I get One, it's too late. 419 00:25:06,376 --> 00:25:11,545 Speaker 1: It's not. Two, they'll hate me. They won't. Three, they 420 00:25:11,586 --> 00:25:15,686 Speaker 1: can't make friends. They will. And the good kind. Okay. 421 00:25:16,866 --> 00:25:19,146 Speaker 1: All right. How are you guys doing? You've been listening 422 00:25:19,166 --> 00:25:21,366 Speaker 1: for a little bit. A little pop quiz for you. 423 00:25:21,646 --> 00:25:26,836 Speaker 1: When you, you listener, have free time, do you use 424 00:25:26,876 --> 00:25:32,056 Speaker 1: the phone or another device to relax? Yes or no? Okay, 425 00:25:32,076 --> 00:25:34,236 Speaker 1: let's be honest. For most of us, we're like, yes, okay, 426 00:25:34,275 --> 00:25:36,656 Speaker 1: we all do it. Yes, we do. We do. So, 427 00:25:36,816 --> 00:25:40,586 Speaker 1: so much of the reset is, yes, it is our children, 428 00:25:41,205 --> 00:25:45,745 Speaker 1: but it is just as much us. And let me 429 00:25:45,806 --> 00:25:48,826 Speaker 1: be painfully honest. A lot of times we do not 430 00:25:48,886 --> 00:25:52,096 Speaker 1: want to tell our children, get off that phone, get 431 00:25:52,176 --> 00:25:55,215 Speaker 1: off social media, because then they'll be like, well, you're 432 00:25:55,296 --> 00:25:57,936 Speaker 1: on it all day. You're on it all the time. 433 00:25:58,995 --> 00:26:02,045 Speaker 1: So Lord help us. And the Great Tech Reset is 434 00:26:02,106 --> 00:26:06,325 Speaker 1: just as much about us as parents resetting the technology 435 00:26:06,366 --> 00:26:10,086 Speaker 1: in our home as it is our children. They did 436 00:26:10,106 --> 00:26:13,916 Speaker 1: this study at University of Washington where they saw a 437 00:26:14,015 --> 00:26:18,916 Speaker 1: baby at just 42 minutes old and the mom would 438 00:26:18,955 --> 00:26:21,756 Speaker 1: stick out her tongue and the baby would stick out 439 00:26:21,796 --> 00:26:25,735 Speaker 1: his tongue and the baby was imitating the mother. even 440 00:26:25,836 --> 00:26:29,946 Speaker 1: after only 41, 42 minutes on this earth, our kids 441 00:26:30,686 --> 00:26:33,696 Speaker 1: are going to do what we do. And if they 442 00:26:33,775 --> 00:26:39,256 Speaker 1: see us scrolling a lot, distracted, caring about what other 443 00:26:39,296 --> 00:26:43,876 Speaker 1: people think, always on the email treadmill, YouTube treadmill, stocks, 444 00:26:44,056 --> 00:26:47,696 Speaker 1: news treadmill, freaking out because of the latest headline, guess what? 445 00:26:48,076 --> 00:26:50,255 Speaker 1: They're going to freak out about the latest thing on 446 00:26:50,316 --> 00:26:54,196 Speaker 1: Instagram or TikTok too. So for us to realize, okay, 447 00:26:54,576 --> 00:26:58,636 Speaker 1: I need to model this. So my friends, my invitation 448 00:26:58,696 --> 00:27:04,406 Speaker 1: to you is go right now, tech.com. www.resetbook.com. The link 449 00:27:04,446 --> 00:27:08,265 Speaker 1: is in the show notes. Order my free book and 450 00:27:08,346 --> 00:27:14,076 Speaker 1: let's begin this journey together to reset your home. Simple steps. 451 00:27:14,376 --> 00:27:16,976 Speaker 1: Put your phone in grayscale. My son, Ethan, when he 452 00:27:17,015 --> 00:27:19,676 Speaker 1: went to college, he came home and his phone was 453 00:27:19,735 --> 00:27:21,715 Speaker 1: in grayscale. And I was like, oh, your phone is 454 00:27:21,755 --> 00:27:25,706 Speaker 1: in grayscale. And he was like, yeah, I really like 455 00:27:25,745 --> 00:27:27,606 Speaker 1: it this way. And then I realized, wait a minute, 456 00:27:27,686 --> 00:27:30,816 Speaker 1: when mine is in grayscale, it's so much less tempting 457 00:27:31,056 --> 00:27:34,196 Speaker 1: to scroll through social media, to watch YouTube videos, et cetera. 458 00:27:34,255 --> 00:27:38,955 Speaker 1: So I highly recommend this practice. It's been hugely a 459 00:27:38,995 --> 00:27:42,056 Speaker 1: lifesaver for me that it helps me keep my phone 460 00:27:42,616 --> 00:27:44,546 Speaker 1: on track. So I just do what I need to do. 461 00:27:44,606 --> 00:27:47,266 Speaker 1: And then I put it down because it's just not 462 00:27:47,326 --> 00:27:50,346 Speaker 1: as pleasurable when it's in color. It's a game changer. 463 00:27:50,586 --> 00:27:54,026 Speaker 1: And it's just something so simple. All right, the book 464 00:27:54,285 --> 00:27:57,485 Speaker 1: will have so much more for you. And I want 465 00:27:57,505 --> 00:28:01,205 Speaker 1: to end with this scripture from Luke 12, 4. You know, 466 00:28:01,225 --> 00:28:04,365 Speaker 1: we've talked a little bit about what we're afraid of. 467 00:28:04,426 --> 00:28:07,855 Speaker 1: We're afraid that our kids won't like us. We're afraid 468 00:28:07,876 --> 00:28:10,416 Speaker 1: that it's too late. We're afraid that our kids won't 469 00:28:10,455 --> 00:28:15,235 Speaker 1: make friends. But I want to end with a proper 470 00:28:15,296 --> 00:28:19,116 Speaker 1: place and hear me out to place our fear. Luke 12, 4. 471 00:28:19,116 --> 00:28:21,485 Speaker 1: And I say to you, my friends, Do not be 472 00:28:21,546 --> 00:28:24,235 Speaker 1: afraid of those who kill the body and after that 473 00:28:24,376 --> 00:28:26,955 Speaker 1: have no more they can do. But I will show 474 00:28:27,035 --> 00:28:30,715 Speaker 1: you whom you shall fear. Fear him who after he 475 00:28:30,796 --> 00:28:34,095 Speaker 1: is killed has power to cast into hell. Yes, I 476 00:28:34,156 --> 00:28:38,306 Speaker 1: say to you, fear him. Okay, what is fear? What 477 00:28:38,386 --> 00:28:42,216 Speaker 1: is Jesus saying in Luke? Jesus is saying, hey, don't 478 00:28:42,256 --> 00:28:45,016 Speaker 1: be afraid of those who might kill you and persecute you. 479 00:28:45,476 --> 00:28:47,856 Speaker 1: You know, they just kill the body. What you really 480 00:28:47,896 --> 00:28:52,416 Speaker 1: should fear is God. God who can really completely annihilate you. 481 00:28:53,156 --> 00:28:57,315 Speaker 1: The fear of God. Don't fear your followers. Don't fear like, oh, 482 00:28:57,376 --> 00:28:59,376 Speaker 1: am I going to not have enough followers? Am I 483 00:28:59,436 --> 00:29:01,296 Speaker 1: not going to have someone who likes this video? Don't 484 00:29:01,316 --> 00:29:05,026 Speaker 1: fear them. Fear God who can put you into hell. Now, 485 00:29:05,286 --> 00:29:07,686 Speaker 1: that is real. And the fear of God is something 486 00:29:07,726 --> 00:29:13,246 Speaker 1: we are truly missing in our culture. The fear, awe, reverence, 487 00:29:13,786 --> 00:29:16,446 Speaker 1: the fear of God. We need it. But check this out. 488 00:29:16,546 --> 00:29:20,825 Speaker 1: That's verse five. Okay. So it's showing God is, you 489 00:29:20,866 --> 00:29:23,026 Speaker 1: don't trifle with God. It's basically what it's saying. Don't 490 00:29:23,066 --> 00:29:27,276 Speaker 1: trifle with God. Verse five. Verse six, the very next verse. 491 00:29:28,236 --> 00:29:32,436 Speaker 1: Are not five sparrows sold for two copper coins? And 492 00:29:32,476 --> 00:29:36,956 Speaker 1: not one of them is forgotten before God. In other words, 493 00:29:37,596 --> 00:29:41,696 Speaker 1: five sparrows is worthless, worth two pennies. Here are these 494 00:29:41,756 --> 00:29:46,506 Speaker 1: most worthless creatures in that time, worth two copper coins, 495 00:29:46,666 --> 00:29:50,706 Speaker 1: and yet God knows them. Here he's saying, fear me, 496 00:29:51,786 --> 00:29:56,526 Speaker 1: but I know about the penny sparrow. right? Like businesses 497 00:29:56,566 --> 00:30:00,706 Speaker 1: won't even take pennies right now. Like they're obsolete. God says, 498 00:30:01,406 --> 00:30:03,926 Speaker 1: I know about that sparrow. So here he is in 499 00:30:04,046 --> 00:30:06,266 Speaker 1: one breath saying, I'm the God you should fear. And 500 00:30:06,366 --> 00:30:09,646 Speaker 1: I'm the God who is so tender and so loving 501 00:30:09,886 --> 00:30:14,575 Speaker 1: that a sparrow doesn't even like is known before me. 502 00:30:16,646 --> 00:30:19,116 Speaker 1: But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 503 00:30:19,176 --> 00:30:22,516 Speaker 1: Do not fear, therefore. You are of more value than 504 00:30:22,556 --> 00:30:25,456 Speaker 1: many sparrows. And this, my friend, is the heart of 505 00:30:25,496 --> 00:30:29,166 Speaker 1: the great tech reset. Our kids must know our God. 506 00:30:29,826 --> 00:30:32,666 Speaker 1: And technology is pulling away so many of our children. 507 00:30:33,116 --> 00:30:37,196 Speaker 1: from knowing the living God. And so fear God, not 508 00:30:37,236 --> 00:30:40,486 Speaker 1: your kids that they're going to get mad. Fear God, 509 00:30:40,706 --> 00:30:43,866 Speaker 1: not like being unpopular and not getting the likes. Fear 510 00:30:43,906 --> 00:30:46,426 Speaker 1: God because he has the power to cast us into hell. 511 00:30:47,266 --> 00:30:50,606 Speaker 1: And he loves us so much that he knows every 512 00:30:50,726 --> 00:30:54,986 Speaker 1: single hair on our heads. And his thoughts are like 513 00:30:55,026 --> 00:30:58,726 Speaker 1: the sands of the seashore. Psalm 139 towards us. He 514 00:30:58,846 --> 00:31:04,056 Speaker 1: loves us so much. So when my daughter, Noel, I 515 00:31:04,096 --> 00:31:05,595 Speaker 1: have a picture of her doing this. That's why it's 516 00:31:05,656 --> 00:31:09,036 Speaker 1: so in my mind. But when the kids were in 517 00:31:09,096 --> 00:31:12,706 Speaker 1: kindergarten and the class list went up, right? And you're 518 00:31:12,746 --> 00:31:15,125 Speaker 1: going into kindergarten for the first time. It's very exciting. 519 00:31:15,626 --> 00:31:18,686 Speaker 1: So we would all ride our bikes to our community 520 00:31:18,726 --> 00:31:22,066 Speaker 1: school and look at the list and find your name 521 00:31:22,146 --> 00:31:25,315 Speaker 1: on the list. And I have this photograph. of Noel 522 00:31:25,896 --> 00:31:28,896 Speaker 1: pointing to her name on the list, you know, and 523 00:31:28,916 --> 00:31:31,666 Speaker 1: she was so excited, like, that's my name on the 524 00:31:31,726 --> 00:31:35,006 Speaker 1: list in kinder. And the most important thing for our 525 00:31:35,066 --> 00:31:38,086 Speaker 1: kids is that their name is written in the Lamb's 526 00:31:38,146 --> 00:31:40,686 Speaker 1: book of life. It's described in the book of Revelation 527 00:31:40,746 --> 00:31:43,276 Speaker 1: that when the book is opened, who are those who 528 00:31:43,306 --> 00:31:46,556 Speaker 1: belong to Jesus Christ? Who are those who follow him 529 00:31:46,676 --> 00:31:49,836 Speaker 1: and who are his disciples? You want your children to 530 00:31:50,236 --> 00:31:53,496 Speaker 1: to be in the Lamb's Book of Life and let 531 00:31:53,556 --> 00:31:58,716 Speaker 1: that inform how you use technology in your home. Let 532 00:31:58,756 --> 00:32:02,206 Speaker 1: me pray us out. Lord, we want all of our 533 00:32:02,246 --> 00:32:05,065 Speaker 1: children to be in the Lamb's Book of Life. We 534 00:32:05,126 --> 00:32:08,986 Speaker 1: want their names written and we want them in heaven. 535 00:32:09,426 --> 00:32:12,046 Speaker 1: We want them to be your followers on earth, to 536 00:32:12,086 --> 00:32:14,976 Speaker 1: be your disciples all the days of their life. And 537 00:32:15,016 --> 00:32:17,936 Speaker 1: we ask now for wisdom. We pray you would show 538 00:32:18,016 --> 00:32:21,146 Speaker 1: us for each child What do they need right now? 539 00:32:22,006 --> 00:32:24,865 Speaker 1: What do we need to decide for our young children 540 00:32:24,886 --> 00:32:28,356 Speaker 1: for the future to protect them? What do we need 541 00:32:28,396 --> 00:32:31,276 Speaker 1: to do now to intervene with any of our kids 542 00:32:31,336 --> 00:32:37,056 Speaker 1: right now who are being really harmed by technology? Lord, 543 00:32:37,096 --> 00:32:39,556 Speaker 1: we need your power. This is a spiritual battle that 544 00:32:39,576 --> 00:32:42,516 Speaker 1: we cannot do on our own. And we take authority 545 00:32:42,856 --> 00:32:46,135 Speaker 1: over our homes in the name of Jesus, that our 546 00:32:46,206 --> 00:32:49,766 Speaker 1: homes be places where you are exalted. And that the 547 00:32:49,886 --> 00:32:53,325 Speaker 1: enemy would not be able to set up little stations 548 00:32:53,406 --> 00:32:59,196 Speaker 1: through video games, pornography, phone use, Instagram, etc. We pray 549 00:32:59,256 --> 00:33:02,356 Speaker 1: against that. And we pray your peace would rule in 550 00:33:02,596 --> 00:33:06,516 Speaker 1: every bedroom, in every room of our homes. God, give 551 00:33:06,556 --> 00:33:10,816 Speaker 1: us great boldness and great tenderness at the same time. 552 00:33:10,856 --> 00:33:15,256 Speaker 1: Help us to be strong and really tender and talk 553 00:33:15,296 --> 00:33:18,486 Speaker 1: to our children. Show us what to do. I pray 554 00:33:18,506 --> 00:33:21,366 Speaker 1: that you'd use the book, The Great Tech Reset. Use it, Lord, 555 00:33:21,586 --> 00:33:24,436 Speaker 1: to reset our homes, that we would be towards you 556 00:33:24,596 --> 00:33:27,856 Speaker 1: in faith. Lord, turn our whole hearts, all of our hearts, 557 00:33:28,176 --> 00:33:34,986 Speaker 1: every person in our home towards you. We pray in Jesus' name. Amen. Amen. Well, friends, 558 00:33:35,006 --> 00:33:37,406 Speaker 1: this has been very sweet. I really feel like we've 559 00:33:37,426 --> 00:33:41,896 Speaker 1: had this heart-to-heart together. If you could picture me dropping 560 00:33:41,916 --> 00:33:44,756 Speaker 1: down my knees and begging you, please tell people about 561 00:33:44,776 --> 00:33:50,236 Speaker 1: this book. We need a great tech reset. In America, 562 00:33:50,496 --> 00:33:53,246 Speaker 1: in every country of the world where kids are on technology, 563 00:33:53,376 --> 00:33:57,865 Speaker 1: we need this reset. So again, the book is, what 564 00:33:57,926 --> 00:34:01,346 Speaker 1: is it guys? The Great Tech Reset. You can go 565 00:34:01,426 --> 00:34:05,966 Speaker 1: to techresetbook.com, order your free copy. And guess what? If 566 00:34:05,986 --> 00:34:08,536 Speaker 1: you're listening and you're in a mom's group, you're at 567 00:34:08,556 --> 00:34:11,716 Speaker 1: a church group, you're at a school, you can order 568 00:34:11,896 --> 00:34:15,835 Speaker 1: bulk copies. You can order, I want 200 copies of 569 00:34:15,876 --> 00:34:18,596 Speaker 1: this book for my school, and you can give them 570 00:34:18,786 --> 00:34:21,506 Speaker 1: out for free with my full blessing and the full 571 00:34:21,526 --> 00:34:24,266 Speaker 1: blessing of Summit Ministries. That's what this book is about. 572 00:34:24,866 --> 00:34:28,826 Speaker 1: We want thousands and thousands and thousands of copies, not 573 00:34:28,866 --> 00:34:30,586 Speaker 1: just to go in the air, but to go in 574 00:34:30,626 --> 00:34:34,616 Speaker 1: the hands of people who are ready to reset, who 575 00:34:34,716 --> 00:34:37,696 Speaker 1: want to do something to save their kids. So please, 576 00:34:38,366 --> 00:34:44,186 Speaker 1: share this book with educators, church leaders, small groups. I just, 577 00:34:44,426 --> 00:34:46,236 Speaker 1: I ask that you would help me to spread the word. 578 00:34:46,696 --> 00:34:48,956 Speaker 1: Thank you so much. And we'll, and next week you'll 579 00:34:48,976 --> 00:34:53,036 Speaker 1: hear from my daughter, Noelle. Thank you. I hope you've 580 00:34:53,076 --> 00:34:56,676 Speaker 1: enjoyed today's conversation. I'd love to keep in touch beyond 581 00:34:56,716 --> 00:35:00,496 Speaker 1: this podcast. Click subscribe in the show notes, and I 582 00:35:00,536 --> 00:35:02,876 Speaker 1: will give you my latest email to keep up on 583 00:35:02,936 --> 00:35:06,895 Speaker 1: what's happening with technology and kids. And maybe you like 584 00:35:06,976 --> 00:35:09,876 Speaker 1: reading or listening to books. I have a lot of books. 585 00:35:10,056 --> 00:35:13,536 Speaker 1: You could start with the big three, Making Marriage Easier, 586 00:35:14,116 --> 00:35:17,966 Speaker 1: Parents Rising, or Screen Kids. A big thank you to 587 00:35:17,986 --> 00:35:20,546 Speaker 1: the team at Life Audio for their partnership with the 588 00:35:20,586 --> 00:35:24,886 Speaker 1: Happy Home Podcast. Check out lifeaudio.com for dozens of other 589 00:35:25,046 --> 00:35:30,366 Speaker 1: faith-related podcasts about prayer, Bible study, and more. Remember, you 590 00:35:30,406 --> 00:35:33,216 Speaker 1: don't have to come from a happy home to create one. 591 00:35:33,696 --> 00:35:35,786 Speaker 1: You too can have a happy home.