1 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:03,600 Speaker 1: Life Audio. 2 00:00:05,080 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 2: I think all of us need a little bit of 3 00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:09,119 Speaker 2: hope today, you know, some hope to get through what 4 00:00:09,160 --> 00:00:12,520 Speaker 2: we're going through. My friend Tanner Olsen is joining me 5 00:00:12,600 --> 00:00:15,560 Speaker 2: and we are talking about just exactly that. 6 00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:16,720 Speaker 1: Let's get to it. 7 00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:23,800 Speaker 2: Hello, Hello, Hello, ladies and gents, and welcome to this 8 00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:27,040 Speaker 2: week's episode of the Bottom Beloved Podcast. As always, it's 9 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:29,800 Speaker 2: a girl Kirby Kelly back at it again, and I'm 10 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:33,280 Speaker 2: so excited for this week's guest. He has a book 11 00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:36,160 Speaker 2: coming out. You can pre order it today. His name 12 00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:39,120 Speaker 2: is Tanner Olson and the book is called Getting Through 13 00:00:39,360 --> 00:00:42,600 Speaker 2: what You're going Through. And the funny thing is is 14 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:46,519 Speaker 2: that I saw his book on social media, maybe like 15 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:49,159 Speaker 2: a month or two ago when he announced it, and 16 00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:52,240 Speaker 2: I was like, dang, first of all, the cover dope, 17 00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:56,600 Speaker 2: second of all, the topic amazing. Third of all, I 18 00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:59,680 Speaker 2: want to read this. And then when his team reached 19 00:00:59,680 --> 00:01:01,600 Speaker 2: out there like hey, do you want him on your podcast, 20 00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 2: I was like I was literally gonna get his book anyways, 21 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:05,800 Speaker 2: Like we have to make this happen. So it's truly 22 00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:08,880 Speaker 2: a joy that he's here on the podcast today to 23 00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:12,640 Speaker 2: just dive into really like the topic of hope purpose 24 00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:16,840 Speaker 2: meaning but Before we get into that, Tanner, welcome, Can 25 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:19,319 Speaker 2: you just introduce yourself to all the people who are 26 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:21,280 Speaker 2: listening who might not know who you are and what 27 00:01:21,319 --> 00:01:21,560 Speaker 2: you do. 28 00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:24,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, well, like I just told you, Like, I'm just 29 00:01:24,560 --> 00:01:27,200 Speaker 3: a guy who writes words. I if you ask me 30 00:01:27,240 --> 00:01:28,880 Speaker 3: what I do, I tell you that I'm an author, 31 00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:32,480 Speaker 3: a poet, a speaker. I travel around the country sharing poetry, 32 00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:35,800 Speaker 3: telling stories of hope, pointing people back to the love, 33 00:01:35,920 --> 00:01:40,480 Speaker 3: grace and mercy of Jesus and hopefully hopefully spread spread 34 00:01:40,520 --> 00:01:43,319 Speaker 3: hope while I'm doing it, and make people laugh, smile, 35 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:46,360 Speaker 3: and maybe sometimes cry, but not a purpose you don't 36 00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:47,240 Speaker 3: like in a good way. 37 00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:50,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, a healing way, you know. 38 00:01:50,120 --> 00:01:51,880 Speaker 2: Yeah, you laugh and then you like punch him in 39 00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:54,160 Speaker 2: the gut and they're like ooh ooh oh. 40 00:01:55,640 --> 00:01:57,120 Speaker 4: Literally that's exactly it. 41 00:01:57,720 --> 00:01:59,000 Speaker 1: How did you get into all that? 42 00:01:59,120 --> 00:02:02,280 Speaker 2: Like doing poetry, traveling, speaking, writing? 43 00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:03,440 Speaker 1: What led you to all that? 44 00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:04,880 Speaker 4: Growing up? 45 00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:07,240 Speaker 3: I wanted to be in a punk rock band, and 46 00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:09,200 Speaker 3: I also wanted to be in the NBA and a 47 00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 3: stand up comedian, And really none of those three things 48 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:13,400 Speaker 3: really worked out for me because apparently to be in 49 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:14,840 Speaker 3: a band you have to know how to play music. 50 00:02:14,880 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 3: And sing, and I can't do any of that. To 51 00:02:17,320 --> 00:02:18,840 Speaker 3: be in the NBA, you have to be tall, and 52 00:02:18,880 --> 00:02:20,920 Speaker 3: that didn't happen for me either. I do make some 53 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:24,079 Speaker 3: jokes every now and again, but I got to writing 54 00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:26,799 Speaker 3: and getting on stage and sharing poetry through my love 55 00:02:26,840 --> 00:02:28,640 Speaker 3: of words, which is what kind of first drew me 56 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:31,280 Speaker 3: to punk rock music. How I was just attached to 57 00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:33,600 Speaker 3: the words and how they made me feel like they. 58 00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:35,320 Speaker 4: Saw me for who I was. 59 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:38,720 Speaker 3: And so I've been writing since middle school, high school, 60 00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:40,960 Speaker 3: and then eventually after college, I decided to get on 61 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,240 Speaker 3: stage and read poetry and it just kind of been 62 00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:45,839 Speaker 3: doing this for thirteen years now. 63 00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:49,640 Speaker 2: That's awesome, and I think it's really cool that a 64 00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:52,840 Speaker 2: passion of yours, which is also a gift of yours, 65 00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:57,840 Speaker 2: communicating through poetry, through written work, through speaking is also 66 00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:01,280 Speaker 2: now like vocationally part of your ministry work. 67 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:03,560 Speaker 1: And being able to like partner with the Lord in that. 68 00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:05,840 Speaker 2: So, like, what has that looked like for you even 69 00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:08,680 Speaker 2: just to be able to use that skill set, that passion, 70 00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:10,200 Speaker 2: those gifts for the glory of God. 71 00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:13,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, well it didn't happen overnight, you know, like this 72 00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:15,200 Speaker 3: was like thirteen years in the making. 73 00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:16,760 Speaker 4: So I worked full time jobs. 74 00:03:16,760 --> 00:03:18,960 Speaker 3: I'd wake up at four am to write and to 75 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:21,760 Speaker 3: create and to practice, and then before I go to bed, 76 00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:23,760 Speaker 3: I would do the same thing over and over again, 77 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:27,440 Speaker 3: and eventually, slowly, over time, I just kept taking those small, 78 00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:31,440 Speaker 3: faithful steps forward, asking if I can help here, or 79 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:34,840 Speaker 3: write for this organization, or do this thing, and just 80 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,280 Speaker 3: to kind of give what I have. That's one of 81 00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:39,440 Speaker 3: the things that I tell all creatives. It's like, just 82 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 3: give what you have and see where that leads. There's 83 00:03:42,560 --> 00:03:45,680 Speaker 3: so much joy and fulfillment just in the creating and 84 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:49,400 Speaker 3: the giving and the sharing of the art with others. 85 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:53,160 Speaker 3: And thankfully it turned into you a full time gig 86 00:03:53,160 --> 00:03:56,480 Speaker 3: where I do get to travel and share and write 87 00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:58,280 Speaker 3: and be with people day after day. 88 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:00,000 Speaker 1: That's really cool. 89 00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:02,520 Speaker 2: Well, can you tell us then? You have a new 90 00:04:02,520 --> 00:04:05,240 Speaker 2: book that is coming out. People can pre order it now. 91 00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:08,640 Speaker 2: It's literally if you're watching the video Porson he has 92 00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:10,720 Speaker 2: the book with him. It looks awesome. I love it 93 00:04:10,760 --> 00:04:15,200 Speaker 2: getting through what you're going through. How did that book, 94 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:18,320 Speaker 2: like that idea, that concept come about? Where was this 95 00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:22,560 Speaker 2: idea birthed from? I guess was it like one experience 96 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:25,680 Speaker 2: a collection of experiences? The things you noticed in other 97 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:29,320 Speaker 2: people what led to the birth of this book, Well, 98 00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:29,560 Speaker 2: you know. 99 00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:32,000 Speaker 3: It as being a writer and a communicator, you're always 100 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:35,880 Speaker 3: paying attention and looking for stories for the good, the bad, 101 00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 3: the hard, the questions the answers that we're all walking through. 102 00:04:38,839 --> 00:04:40,280 Speaker 3: And I think when we look back on the last 103 00:04:40,279 --> 00:04:44,000 Speaker 3: five years, like all of us can collectively say that 104 00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:46,320 Speaker 3: was a lot. Like one of the things I've learned 105 00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 3: in the last five years is just how hard and 106 00:04:48,880 --> 00:04:51,240 Speaker 3: heavy it is to be a human being, while at 107 00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:53,240 Speaker 3: the same time, like what a gift it is to 108 00:04:53,320 --> 00:04:55,279 Speaker 3: be here and to be alive. Like both of these 109 00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:57,719 Speaker 3: things can be true at the same time, the pain 110 00:04:57,800 --> 00:05:00,600 Speaker 3: and the piece, the grief and the hope. And for me, 111 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:03,160 Speaker 3: my last five years was you know, was a pandemic. 112 00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,800 Speaker 3: My dad almost passed away, my wife and I were 113 00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:10,040 Speaker 3: diagnosed with unexplained infertility. I got a really bad stomach ulcer, 114 00:05:10,120 --> 00:05:11,880 Speaker 3: which is kind of funny at this point, but like 115 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:14,000 Speaker 3: that was like a week where I had no idea 116 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:16,960 Speaker 3: what was going on. Yeah, with my body. There was 117 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,360 Speaker 3: five years of trying to get this career started. There 118 00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:22,360 Speaker 3: was there was waiting, there was grief, there was frustration, 119 00:05:22,520 --> 00:05:24,960 Speaker 3: there was fear, and yet also when all of that, 120 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:27,360 Speaker 3: I learned a lot about who God is, what it 121 00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:30,200 Speaker 3: means to be a person of hope, like our prayers 122 00:05:30,800 --> 00:05:34,200 Speaker 3: to become parents was answered through adoption, and then through 123 00:05:34,240 --> 00:05:38,600 Speaker 3: this whole season, like I wrote a lot of words 124 00:05:38,760 --> 00:05:41,839 Speaker 3: that I needed for myself, and I'm learning that the 125 00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:44,120 Speaker 3: things that I need to hear are often things that 126 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:46,680 Speaker 3: other people need to hear as well. So everything that 127 00:05:46,760 --> 00:05:49,960 Speaker 3: went into this book is stuff that I walked through, 128 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:55,120 Speaker 3: wrestled with, handed over to the Lord, and then tried 129 00:05:55,160 --> 00:05:56,839 Speaker 3: to take back a few times because that's what I do, 130 00:05:57,480 --> 00:05:59,839 Speaker 3: you know, And just there was just like this season 131 00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:03,640 Speaker 3: of pruning but also of growth. Five years was just 132 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:07,039 Speaker 3: a lot And so that's where this whole getting through 133 00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:11,440 Speaker 3: what you're going through idea came from. And it's one 134 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:13,159 Speaker 3: of those books that I needed when I was in 135 00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:15,320 Speaker 3: high school and also one that I think that I'm 136 00:06:15,320 --> 00:06:17,720 Speaker 3: gonna need when I'm seventy five, because I think one 137 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:20,120 Speaker 3: of the things that life always offers us again and 138 00:06:20,160 --> 00:06:23,680 Speaker 3: again is this invitation to trust God and the seasons 139 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:25,599 Speaker 3: and we're always just going through something. 140 00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:31,159 Speaker 2: Absolutely it's cool to hear this perspective now that you 141 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,880 Speaker 2: have of like I have this hope, I have this 142 00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:37,159 Speaker 2: trust in God. I've been able to see how God 143 00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:39,040 Speaker 2: went in and resolved some. 144 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:41,200 Speaker 1: Of these areas, redeemed others. 145 00:06:41,640 --> 00:06:43,960 Speaker 2: But I know that there are people who are listening 146 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,919 Speaker 2: today who are like, that sounds great. I want to 147 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:49,560 Speaker 2: arrive there, But it feels like the place that I 148 00:06:49,600 --> 00:06:52,440 Speaker 2: am stuck in right now has. 149 00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:54,000 Speaker 1: Been going on for way too long. 150 00:06:54,279 --> 00:06:57,000 Speaker 2: It's not working out how I wanted it to work out, 151 00:06:57,480 --> 00:06:59,839 Speaker 2: and I feel like I'm just waiting on God to 152 00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:04,080 Speaker 2: do anything, and it looks like he's not. So for 153 00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:08,600 Speaker 2: those people like do you relate to that and what 154 00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:11,160 Speaker 2: was I'm sure you do. I do, but it's like, 155 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:13,000 Speaker 2: what was what was it like for you to be 156 00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:17,120 Speaker 2: in those moments where it was like the waiting, the wrestling, 157 00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:21,120 Speaker 2: the long winded prayers and questions, and it feels like 158 00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:23,559 Speaker 2: it kind of just echoes in the cave and it's like, God, 159 00:07:23,720 --> 00:07:27,000 Speaker 2: are you even listening to me? Like what did that 160 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:30,480 Speaker 2: look like for you to navigate that and to actually 161 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:31,720 Speaker 2: get through that? 162 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:34,160 Speaker 4: Yeah? Well, a lot of things. 163 00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:36,840 Speaker 3: First of all, it was like looking back and seeing 164 00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:39,840 Speaker 3: that God had been faithful and that is his character, 165 00:07:39,920 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 3: and so if he had been faithful. Then I can 166 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:44,320 Speaker 3: trust that he will continue to be faithful. It was 167 00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:48,760 Speaker 3: remembering that, like, something more is happening than I can see, 168 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,400 Speaker 3: Like life, It feels like life is slipping away from 169 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:54,080 Speaker 3: me in this moment, like I am not the person 170 00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:54,840 Speaker 3: that I want to be. 171 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:56,680 Speaker 4: Life is not what I thought it was. 172 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:58,520 Speaker 3: Going to be, want to be prayed for it to be, 173 00:07:59,040 --> 00:08:01,600 Speaker 3: And yet I can trust that something more is happening 174 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:03,600 Speaker 3: than I can see. It was that, you know, It 175 00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:06,440 Speaker 3: was that pruning back. It was it was the heaviness. 176 00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:09,000 Speaker 3: It was holding on to hope. And one of the 177 00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:11,400 Speaker 3: things that I love about hope is hope is Hope 178 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:16,200 Speaker 3: is fierce. Hope is resilient, but it is not something 179 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:17,640 Speaker 3: that like, it is not rude. 180 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,760 Speaker 4: It just sits with us where we are. 181 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:25,240 Speaker 3: Like my working definition for hope is the full assurance 182 00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:28,240 Speaker 3: that God is with me and in this like no 183 00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:31,440 Speaker 3: matter what this is, God is with me in it. 184 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:34,000 Speaker 3: And I know that He is continuing to work all 185 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:36,360 Speaker 3: things for good. But I also know that He does 186 00:08:36,360 --> 00:08:40,440 Speaker 3: things differently. He does things so different than we would 187 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 3: choose them to be, and yet at some point we 188 00:08:42,559 --> 00:08:46,040 Speaker 3: get to look back and say, Wow, that's what you 189 00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:49,360 Speaker 3: were doing, and there is beauty in the looking back, 190 00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:52,520 Speaker 3: and there's beauty and where you are right now even 191 00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:54,839 Speaker 3: though it is hard. And I think that's one of 192 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:56,600 Speaker 3: the things I've been learning. Like I said, like it's 193 00:08:56,640 --> 00:08:59,679 Speaker 3: two things at one time. It is both the heaviness 194 00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:02,880 Speaker 3: and the hope. So if anybody is in that season, 195 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:08,280 Speaker 3: like I want to tell them, everything will get better, 196 00:09:08,760 --> 00:09:10,680 Speaker 3: but everything will not go the way that you think 197 00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:13,280 Speaker 3: it will go right. And when I say that everything 198 00:09:13,360 --> 00:09:15,600 Speaker 3: is going to be okay, what I mean is that 199 00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:18,680 Speaker 3: in the end everything is going to be okay because 200 00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,320 Speaker 3: along the way it will not all be okay. 201 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:24,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, God, God works it all out for good. 202 00:09:24,440 --> 00:09:27,760 Speaker 2: Like a big story in the Bible that I think 203 00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:31,439 Speaker 2: of is literally where we get that saying from is Joseph. 204 00:09:31,679 --> 00:09:33,599 Speaker 1: It's like you look at his story. 205 00:09:33,280 --> 00:09:36,400 Speaker 2: And it's like this boy who was sold into slavery 206 00:09:36,480 --> 00:09:40,800 Speaker 2: by his brothers, thrown into prison, forgotten about, accused of 207 00:09:40,880 --> 00:09:45,920 Speaker 2: some of the worst things imaginable, was then somehow promoted 208 00:09:46,480 --> 00:09:50,480 Speaker 2: to oversee like an entire nation, then comes face to 209 00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:54,520 Speaker 2: face again with said brothers. They lie to him and 210 00:09:54,559 --> 00:09:56,559 Speaker 2: trying to see him so that they can get out 211 00:09:56,600 --> 00:09:58,760 Speaker 2: of it. And he's like don't you see that, Like 212 00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:02,320 Speaker 2: what you all intended for evil, God meant for good. 213 00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:05,200 Speaker 2: And I think it's easy for me to like say 214 00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:07,280 Speaker 2: that and for us to read that, and it's like, Okay, 215 00:10:07,320 --> 00:10:10,120 Speaker 2: I'm reading like a couple chapters in the Bible over this, 216 00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:13,240 Speaker 2: and it's like, Yeah, this was a real man's real 217 00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:17,400 Speaker 2: life experience, but he arrived to this conclusion and was 218 00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:21,440 Speaker 2: able to reconcile the fact that not only is God good, 219 00:10:21,920 --> 00:10:24,480 Speaker 2: he can actually work these things for good. 220 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:27,559 Speaker 1: And I'm wondering, maybe for. 221 00:10:27,679 --> 00:10:31,000 Speaker 2: Someone who is listening today, or even if you want 222 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:34,120 Speaker 2: to speak from your own experience, was there ever a 223 00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:37,480 Speaker 2: season or a time where it was like, I'm really 224 00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:42,600 Speaker 2: wrestling with reconciling how God's goodness could ever show up here. 225 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:45,560 Speaker 2: Because I'm sure that there's someone today who maybe not 226 00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:48,400 Speaker 2: necessarily is is doubting or wants to. 227 00:10:48,360 --> 00:10:49,200 Speaker 1: Abandon the faith. 228 00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:52,840 Speaker 2: But it's just having a real hard time reconciling God's 229 00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:55,280 Speaker 2: goodness right here in this moment. 230 00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:58,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, trying to make sense of why things are happening, 231 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:00,760 Speaker 3: why life is the way that it is. You know, 232 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:03,200 Speaker 3: Like I mentioned, my wife and I we were we 233 00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:07,200 Speaker 3: had always dreamed of becoming parents, like that was like, 234 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:08,800 Speaker 3: when we got married, We're like, I can't wait to 235 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:11,080 Speaker 3: start a family, and then after years of trying, we 236 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:14,199 Speaker 3: were diagnosed with unexplained infertility, while at the same time 237 00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:17,520 Speaker 3: all of our best friends were getting pregnant and having babies, 238 00:11:17,520 --> 00:11:20,120 Speaker 3: and there was celebration and there was joy, and at 239 00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:22,680 Speaker 3: the same time, there was this longing and there. 240 00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:25,480 Speaker 4: Was this grief. And grief is a beast. 241 00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:29,360 Speaker 3: It is a very heavy mountain, and it is something 242 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:32,280 Speaker 3: that you continue to walk with and carry forward. And 243 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:35,200 Speaker 3: a lot of the time I was praying God, why 244 00:11:35,679 --> 00:11:39,440 Speaker 3: and how why is it like this for us? Why 245 00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:43,000 Speaker 3: are our prayers being answered the way that they're being answered, 246 00:11:43,080 --> 00:11:45,120 Speaker 3: or why are these people receiving the answer. 247 00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:47,480 Speaker 4: To our prayers? Like why is it like this? 248 00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:53,079 Speaker 3: And yet hope continues to work, it continues to move like. 249 00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:54,520 Speaker 4: God has not forgotten us. 250 00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:56,760 Speaker 3: And that's like, I mean, most of that season was 251 00:11:56,840 --> 00:12:01,719 Speaker 3: me fighting up against the lies. You've been forgotten, You're 252 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:04,600 Speaker 3: not good enough, like you know, it doesn't matter, like 253 00:12:04,679 --> 00:12:06,800 Speaker 3: all these things, and it's just like, well, that's that's 254 00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:09,120 Speaker 3: not true. So clinging to the truth in that season 255 00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:11,920 Speaker 3: and understanding that hope is not something that deserts us. 256 00:12:11,920 --> 00:12:14,360 Speaker 3: God is not someone who forgets his people, like he 257 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,920 Speaker 3: does not make mistakes. We live in a broken world, 258 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:20,400 Speaker 3: but God is still good and so I have to 259 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:25,040 Speaker 3: just remember like something more is happening than I can see, 260 00:12:25,080 --> 00:12:28,079 Speaker 3: and hope, Hope changes everything. Hope is the way home. 261 00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:30,360 Speaker 3: And so you know, for us in that season and 262 00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:32,040 Speaker 3: for those who are listening who are in this season 263 00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:34,960 Speaker 3: of like, I just don't like I just don't like 264 00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:38,280 Speaker 3: life right now. There's something about this that just feels 265 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:41,520 Speaker 3: off or I feel behind, or I feel forgotten. Like 266 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:44,240 Speaker 3: the truth in all of that is you're not forgotten, 267 00:12:44,840 --> 00:12:47,320 Speaker 3: You're not behind that you have a God who walks 268 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,079 Speaker 3: beside you and is with you. But your story is 269 00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:51,800 Speaker 3: not going to go the way that you think it's 270 00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:54,200 Speaker 3: going to go, but it's still gonna go and it 271 00:12:54,280 --> 00:12:55,640 Speaker 3: still will be beautiful. 272 00:12:57,160 --> 00:12:57,720 Speaker 1: I love that. 273 00:12:58,240 --> 00:13:02,040 Speaker 2: I think a very real to even that we can 274 00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:05,400 Speaker 2: all face where when we're going through something is to 275 00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:10,880 Speaker 2: try and manufacture a result, right, like to make the 276 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:13,880 Speaker 2: healing happen, to get to really what it is at 277 00:13:13,920 --> 00:13:16,240 Speaker 2: the end of the day is I want control. I 278 00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:18,760 Speaker 2: want control over the situation, and I just want to 279 00:13:19,760 --> 00:13:24,240 Speaker 2: rush either to the end or completely eliminate what I'm 280 00:13:24,280 --> 00:13:27,719 Speaker 2: going through, whether it be the suffering, the infertility, the 281 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:34,160 Speaker 2: lack of questions, the abounding questions. Right, So I guess 282 00:13:34,559 --> 00:13:38,200 Speaker 2: what my question is is how do we Because you're 283 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:40,800 Speaker 2: write about this in your book about just like not 284 00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:44,560 Speaker 2: rushing to the end but actually embracing, like being present 285 00:13:44,960 --> 00:13:48,720 Speaker 2: in your season, can you maybe like speak a little 286 00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:50,839 Speaker 2: bit to that, because I think that is a very 287 00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:53,880 Speaker 2: real temptation to maybe either ignore or to try and 288 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:57,120 Speaker 2: push through, or to manufacture or to strive, but really 289 00:13:57,160 --> 00:13:58,800 Speaker 2: we need to release and be present. 290 00:14:00,120 --> 00:14:02,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, a lot of being a human is just a 291 00:14:02,559 --> 00:14:06,160 Speaker 3: hard it's a hard thing. But the invitation from God 292 00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:08,920 Speaker 3: remains the same, and the reminder from God remains the same, 293 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:11,439 Speaker 3: is that I Am going to walk with you through 294 00:14:11,640 --> 00:14:14,960 Speaker 3: it all. Like God is good at being present. I 295 00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:17,319 Speaker 3: thought about, you know, as a poet, I love words, 296 00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:20,480 Speaker 3: so obviously I love Psalm twenty three, and just reflecting 297 00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:22,800 Speaker 3: on that and the middle of that poem where it 298 00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:25,800 Speaker 3: talks about how I am with you always, Like those 299 00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:27,360 Speaker 3: are the words that I cling to. 300 00:14:27,440 --> 00:14:30,280 Speaker 4: Again and again and again, is that I am with 301 00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:31,520 Speaker 4: you always. 302 00:14:31,680 --> 00:14:34,400 Speaker 3: And so when the heaviness comes, when the questions comes, 303 00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:37,720 Speaker 3: like I want to stand and reflect on the beauty 304 00:14:37,760 --> 00:14:41,480 Speaker 3: and the goodness of the truth. And it's so hard 305 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:45,280 Speaker 3: to sit with what is when what is is not 306 00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:48,960 Speaker 3: what you want it to be. Ye, it is painful, 307 00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:53,200 Speaker 3: it is frustrating. It's like when life is everything that 308 00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:55,760 Speaker 3: you do not want it to be, what do you do? 309 00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:59,600 Speaker 3: And the temptation is to run, it is to hide, 310 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:02,640 Speaker 3: it is to live frustrated, I think is we should 311 00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:05,000 Speaker 3: definitely get frustrated. We should tell God that I do 312 00:15:05,080 --> 00:15:07,760 Speaker 3: not like this, this is hard, Like we should tell 313 00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:09,000 Speaker 3: make me read through the psalms. 314 00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:12,480 Speaker 4: And it is a very admirable. 315 00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:15,480 Speaker 3: Thing to be angry and to take that anger and 316 00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:18,160 Speaker 3: frustration to God in prayer. 317 00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,200 Speaker 4: And so a lot of times in this book. 318 00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:23,400 Speaker 3: One of the things that I mentioned over and over again, 319 00:15:23,920 --> 00:15:25,920 Speaker 3: it was funny as I was like doing the audiobook 320 00:15:25,920 --> 00:15:27,320 Speaker 3: for it, I was just like, how many times am 321 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:31,359 Speaker 3: I going to say open your hands or just breathe? 322 00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:32,920 Speaker 4: But it's true, like. 323 00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:36,640 Speaker 3: There is something about you want to like grip everything 324 00:15:36,760 --> 00:15:39,720 Speaker 3: so tightly, and yet when we open our hands and 325 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:43,360 Speaker 3: just breathe, we're remembering that we can trust the one 326 00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:46,800 Speaker 3: who has invited us to walk with him and That's 327 00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:50,560 Speaker 3: how I want to respond to the heaviness, to the hurt, 328 00:15:50,760 --> 00:15:54,960 Speaker 3: to the grief, is to open my hands and say, Okay, 329 00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:57,160 Speaker 3: I know you're doing something more than I can see. 330 00:15:57,720 --> 00:16:00,080 Speaker 3: Help me get through this, because the only way that 331 00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:02,320 Speaker 3: I'm gonna get through what I'm going through is with 332 00:16:02,400 --> 00:16:03,160 Speaker 3: the help of God. 333 00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:06,920 Speaker 2: Yes, I love what you even just said about like 334 00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:11,040 Speaker 2: how when we read Scripture, I think that sometimes we 335 00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:14,160 Speaker 2: need to like read it again in the sense of 336 00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:18,840 Speaker 2: like not only the context, but it's like David lamented, 337 00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:21,480 Speaker 2: like he was angry. 338 00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:24,040 Speaker 1: He was frustrated, he was sad, he was confused. When 339 00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:25,400 Speaker 1: I think of the psalms. 340 00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:27,720 Speaker 2: And and just him crying out to the Lord, I mean, 341 00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:30,560 Speaker 2: mind you, he had literal armies chasing after him. 342 00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:32,160 Speaker 5: Yeah, I'd feel that he was. 343 00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:37,200 Speaker 2: Like think about that, do you have a literal army 344 00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:40,120 Speaker 2: of a nation going after you? Not to minimize your pain, 345 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:44,280 Speaker 2: but but to that point. I think that sometimes we 346 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:49,600 Speaker 2: don't give ourselves permission to grieve and to lament and 347 00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:53,520 Speaker 2: to be honest with God. And maybe that's because we've 348 00:16:53,520 --> 00:16:55,960 Speaker 2: grown up in faith circles. 349 00:16:56,040 --> 00:16:58,720 Speaker 1: And trust me, I'm a church girl. I love the church. 350 00:16:58,760 --> 00:16:59,960 Speaker 1: I love Christian community. 351 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:04,320 Speaker 2: God loves his church, but maybe some people have experienced 352 00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:08,680 Speaker 2: just communities where they just slapped on a God is 353 00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,520 Speaker 2: Good all the time sticker, and it's like, I feel 354 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:14,440 Speaker 2: like I can't even be honest with people. If I'm 355 00:17:14,440 --> 00:17:17,600 Speaker 2: honest with people or honest with myself, how can I 356 00:17:17,600 --> 00:17:20,080 Speaker 2: be honest with God about these things? I'm just supposed 357 00:17:20,119 --> 00:17:24,640 Speaker 2: to accept it and not question it. But but Scripture 358 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,040 Speaker 2: and you reiterate this in your book, and even with 359 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:32,040 Speaker 2: what you just said, invites us to be vulnerable with 360 00:17:32,119 --> 00:17:36,600 Speaker 2: our a whole, with our emotions before the Lord. And 361 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:39,600 Speaker 2: so I would love to even hear you just like 362 00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:41,920 Speaker 2: speak to people who are in that place today where 363 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:45,919 Speaker 2: it's like I'm afraid to be vulnerable with God with 364 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:50,320 Speaker 2: how I'm actually feeling, Like can I actually get angry 365 00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:53,720 Speaker 2: and grieve and let out my grievances to God will 366 00:17:53,760 --> 00:17:56,679 Speaker 2: least mighte me? And how do I even navigate that 367 00:17:56,840 --> 00:18:00,480 Speaker 2: or cultivate that in these in these and vin because 368 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,359 Speaker 2: maybe someone's listening and they're not going through anything, and 369 00:18:02,359 --> 00:18:04,720 Speaker 2: they're in the best season of their life, but maybe 370 00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:07,639 Speaker 2: their neighbor is going through the hardest thing. How do 371 00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:12,440 Speaker 2: we create those environments where we can collectively even go 372 00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:16,080 Speaker 2: to God with the hard stuff honestly and vulnerably. 373 00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:19,000 Speaker 3: Well, I would say that your neighbor probably is going 374 00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:19,840 Speaker 3: through the heart stuff. 375 00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:21,080 Speaker 4: They definitely are. 376 00:18:22,680 --> 00:18:25,320 Speaker 3: One of the Have you ever like told somebody like 377 00:18:25,359 --> 00:18:27,639 Speaker 3: what you're going through and they respond with, you know, 378 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:31,480 Speaker 3: well it could be worse. That's like the worst thing 379 00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:33,840 Speaker 3: that you can say to somebody. It's a conversation killer. 380 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:37,680 Speaker 3: It just like bypasses all their vulnerability and what they're 381 00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:41,520 Speaker 3: trying to express to you. And I think sometimes we 382 00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:44,000 Speaker 3: think that that's how God might respond to us as 383 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,919 Speaker 3: we say I'm going through this really hard thing, and 384 00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:47,680 Speaker 3: you think that God's going to say, well, it could 385 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:50,119 Speaker 3: be worse, right, or do you know like kind of 386 00:18:50,119 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 3: we were like joking about like do you have a 387 00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:52,879 Speaker 3: litle army coming after you? 388 00:18:52,920 --> 00:18:53,080 Speaker 4: No? 389 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:56,560 Speaker 3: But I think we're like we want to minimize everything, 390 00:18:57,119 --> 00:19:01,879 Speaker 3: and God moves in close, comes close and just says 391 00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:05,959 Speaker 3: what is going on. One of my favorite things about 392 00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:10,359 Speaker 3: Jesus in who he is is he he invites. He 393 00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:14,359 Speaker 3: is always inviting people to him to bring what they have. 394 00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:17,040 Speaker 3: And often what we have is we have hurt, we 395 00:19:17,119 --> 00:19:19,639 Speaker 3: have pain, we have questions, we have grief, and we 396 00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:23,920 Speaker 3: have frustration, and that's one of the reasons why Jesus came, right, 397 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,560 Speaker 3: He came for that, and so we can bring that 398 00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:29,679 Speaker 3: to him and know that he doesn't respond with you know, 399 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:34,560 Speaker 3: it could be worse, like if you're going through it, 400 00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:38,240 Speaker 3: it matters. It definitely matters. It's hard to be a 401 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:41,600 Speaker 3: human being. Jesus knew that, and so he knows that, 402 00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:44,200 Speaker 3: like the small things are still really really big things 403 00:19:44,280 --> 00:19:47,920 Speaker 3: because those small things they add up and they compound, 404 00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:52,320 Speaker 3: and well, grace is still there. And that's what Jesus 405 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:55,040 Speaker 3: gives us when we come to him. You know, So 406 00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:57,159 Speaker 3: I don't know that's what I would say to somebody. 407 00:19:57,160 --> 00:19:59,400 Speaker 3: And I also know, like the seasons that you're going through, 408 00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:02,440 Speaker 3: like you're gonna go, you are being made stronger through 409 00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:04,439 Speaker 3: those seasons. And no one really wants to hear that. 410 00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:08,600 Speaker 3: But yeah, being made stronger in that it doesn't mean like, 411 00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,880 Speaker 3: well this is much better now because I'm getting stronger. 412 00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:14,560 Speaker 3: It just like happens because of that. But this invitation 413 00:20:14,760 --> 00:20:18,000 Speaker 3: to trust, we begin to build this muscle of trust, 414 00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:23,000 Speaker 3: of understanding of going to God immediately when something happens 415 00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:26,200 Speaker 3: in our lives, and that just like strengthens the connection 416 00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:29,080 Speaker 3: and the relationship to where we are quick to release, 417 00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:31,480 Speaker 3: to open our hands and to say I know you're 418 00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:34,000 Speaker 3: doing something more than I can see. I know that 419 00:20:34,080 --> 00:20:36,239 Speaker 3: everything is going to be okay one day, even if 420 00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:38,480 Speaker 3: everything isn't okay today. 421 00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:39,800 Speaker 4: Here we go. 422 00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,200 Speaker 1: That's really good. That's really good, Tanner. 423 00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:46,080 Speaker 2: I think that so many people can relate even to 424 00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:48,919 Speaker 2: that sentiment of like, it makes me think of the 425 00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:51,399 Speaker 2: saying like God gives as tough as battles to as 426 00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:52,680 Speaker 2: strongest soldiers. 427 00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:56,200 Speaker 4: And that was the rejected That was the rejected title 428 00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:56,720 Speaker 4: for this book. 429 00:20:56,760 --> 00:21:00,880 Speaker 2: By the way, was it really no, no, no be funny? 430 00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:03,040 Speaker 2: I remember there was like a whole meme about that, 431 00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:04,919 Speaker 2: and it's like, girl. 432 00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:07,840 Speaker 1: Just do the dishes, Like it relates that puff. 433 00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:14,520 Speaker 5: But that's the toughest battle. And then it's like for 434 00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:16,919 Speaker 5: other people, they're literally going through war and it's like 435 00:21:17,760 --> 00:21:19,000 Speaker 5: my my battle. 436 00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:21,399 Speaker 4: Really that, But there are a lot of dishes. 437 00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:21,640 Speaker 3: So. 438 00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:25,720 Speaker 2: And I gotta go to the store and get more 439 00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:28,359 Speaker 2: dish So I'm like, I gotta spend money on that. 440 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:31,760 Speaker 4: With that exactly, it is hard to be a human. 441 00:21:32,400 --> 00:21:33,919 Speaker 1: It is hard to be and yet. 442 00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:37,920 Speaker 3: Grace continues to find us again and again and again. 443 00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:41,359 Speaker 3: We're all just first time human beings getting through what 444 00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:43,880 Speaker 3: we're going through, and so I think at the same 445 00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:45,879 Speaker 3: time we also have to give ourselves a little bit 446 00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:49,960 Speaker 3: of that grace and understand like, yeah, this isn't great. 447 00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:54,639 Speaker 3: I do wish things were better, and yet I still 448 00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:57,200 Speaker 3: know that God is present with me in this. 449 00:21:57,320 --> 00:22:00,359 Speaker 4: Because hope does not run. Hope is your's. 450 00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:04,959 Speaker 3: Hope is resilient, it remains when the heaviness arrives. You 451 00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:08,560 Speaker 3: cannot scare hope away. That's one of the beautiful things 452 00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:11,400 Speaker 3: about hope, and. 453 00:22:11,359 --> 00:22:14,159 Speaker 2: It's something that we have to actively choose, even like 454 00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:18,199 Speaker 2: to actually dare to hope in certain situations, because it 455 00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:20,679 Speaker 2: can be one of those things where it is as 456 00:22:20,760 --> 00:22:23,120 Speaker 2: much as it feels vulnerable to be real with God 457 00:22:23,160 --> 00:22:27,200 Speaker 2: about certain things, it can also feel vulnerable to hope again, 458 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:30,400 Speaker 2: especially when there has been disappointment, when there has been 459 00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:33,199 Speaker 2: let down, when the people who were supposed to be 460 00:22:33,240 --> 00:22:36,040 Speaker 2: there for you weren't there for you, or the systems 461 00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:38,240 Speaker 2: that were set up were meant to protect you and 462 00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:40,199 Speaker 2: they didn't protect you. I mean, the list goes on 463 00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:43,359 Speaker 2: of what a person's trauma could be and I get 464 00:22:43,359 --> 00:22:48,159 Speaker 2: that there are people who really have experienced almost like 465 00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:53,199 Speaker 2: an insurmountable amount of loss in their life. And I 466 00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:56,480 Speaker 2: even just want to encourage people in that sense of 467 00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:59,720 Speaker 2: like there is I get that there is so much 468 00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:02,800 Speaker 2: loss that we can experience. I'm living proof of that 469 00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:04,920 Speaker 2: for the people who know me who listen to this podcast. 470 00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:10,600 Speaker 2: But there has also been, because of God, so much gain. 471 00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:14,960 Speaker 1: There's been so much gain within the duality of loss. 472 00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:17,600 Speaker 1: And hope is one of those things that I have gained. 473 00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:19,560 Speaker 1: I know it's one of those things that you have gained. 474 00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:23,000 Speaker 2: And I'm wondering what are other things I guess through 475 00:23:23,040 --> 00:23:27,159 Speaker 2: the trials, in the different seasons of difficulty that you 476 00:23:27,359 --> 00:23:29,879 Speaker 2: ended up gaining where it was like, Wow, this was 477 00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:33,880 Speaker 2: actually a surprising gift from the Lord that he gave 478 00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:37,080 Speaker 2: me these things in this place, in this season, in 479 00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:39,720 Speaker 2: this time, the fruit that maybe he produced in you. 480 00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:43,800 Speaker 3: Even Yeah, when you go through something like you are 481 00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:47,520 Speaker 3: gonna be You're gonna be changed, like we we just 482 00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:47,960 Speaker 3: know that. 483 00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:49,440 Speaker 4: And I think for me. 484 00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:52,440 Speaker 3: Because I because I didn't run from all of this, 485 00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:57,000 Speaker 3: because I leaned into it, like I've gained this new perspective. 486 00:23:57,520 --> 00:23:59,439 Speaker 3: Like when you go through something like when we went 487 00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:03,520 Speaker 3: through we were diagnosed with unexplained infertility, and when our 488 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:06,919 Speaker 3: son came home through adoption, like I gained a brand 489 00:24:06,960 --> 00:24:12,919 Speaker 3: new perspective on this, on like hidden struggles within relationships, 490 00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:17,760 Speaker 3: on dreams that don't come true, on the heaviness of 491 00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:20,439 Speaker 3: just being in a season of waiting, and how like 492 00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:23,120 Speaker 3: those small things really they really are the big things 493 00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:26,800 Speaker 3: and they eat away, they eat away at us. I've 494 00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:29,639 Speaker 3: been given this like new perspective, and I can see 495 00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,760 Speaker 3: that other people are you know, are hurting as well, 496 00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:34,000 Speaker 3: and I can sit with them in that not with 497 00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:37,639 Speaker 3: the answers. I do not have the answers. This book 498 00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:39,439 Speaker 3: that I wrote is not a book of answers. But 499 00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:41,760 Speaker 3: what it is is it's something that can sit with 500 00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:44,919 Speaker 3: you in the heaviness. And I think that's what that 501 00:24:45,040 --> 00:24:49,439 Speaker 3: season like changed in me or formed in me is. 502 00:24:49,520 --> 00:24:52,159 Speaker 3: Now I feel like I can sit with people in 503 00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:56,560 Speaker 3: their heaviness and just say things like well nothing, Silence 504 00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:59,040 Speaker 3: is always a good response when people are hurting, but 505 00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:01,040 Speaker 3: I can tell them things like I hate this for you, 506 00:25:01,760 --> 00:25:05,320 Speaker 3: this is like this is terrible, Or do you want 507 00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:07,920 Speaker 3: to go for a walk, you know, like to sit 508 00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:10,159 Speaker 3: with somebody in their ache, to sit with them in 509 00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:13,080 Speaker 3: their heaviness, and to not just say like, oh, it's 510 00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:14,200 Speaker 3: gonna be okay. 511 00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:17,000 Speaker 4: But say like it's I think today's hard. 512 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:19,840 Speaker 3: I'm here with you in this, and then to remind them, 513 00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:22,159 Speaker 3: you know, the things that I've I have learned at 514 00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,000 Speaker 3: the right time of like this is not the end, 515 00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:28,160 Speaker 3: that life is not a race, that you're not behind, 516 00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:30,680 Speaker 3: and that good and we can believe this even though 517 00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:32,760 Speaker 3: it's hard, like good is on the way because we 518 00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:35,439 Speaker 3: know that the story ends with meeting Jesus. 519 00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:38,320 Speaker 4: All of this ends with meeting Jesus. 520 00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:42,480 Speaker 3: I think about Simeon and Anna the story when Jesus 521 00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:44,520 Speaker 3: is there and they waited for years. Simeon was like, 522 00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:46,439 Speaker 3: I'm not gonna die until I get to, you know, 523 00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:50,000 Speaker 3: see the Lord's Christ. And eventually, years later, years go by, 524 00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:53,720 Speaker 3: he gets to hold Jesus in his arms. The story 525 00:25:53,960 --> 00:25:58,320 Speaker 3: ends with meeting Jesus. That means that everything isn't gonna 526 00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:00,240 Speaker 3: be okay. Life is full of trouble, and yet all 527 00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,480 Speaker 3: things are in the hands of God, and all of 528 00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:04,679 Speaker 3: this ends with restoration. 529 00:26:05,520 --> 00:26:09,919 Speaker 2: M I mean, that's the Biblical merit meta narrative, is 530 00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:12,760 Speaker 2: that we have creation and fall, redemption, restoration, it is. 531 00:26:12,960 --> 00:26:15,119 Speaker 2: We see it within the small stories, we see it 532 00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:18,040 Speaker 2: within the big story, and we can see that within 533 00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:18,920 Speaker 2: our own stories. 534 00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:20,720 Speaker 1: And that is something that we get to have. 535 00:26:20,760 --> 00:26:25,280 Speaker 2: Hope in today knowing that this is the same God 536 00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:28,639 Speaker 2: that we get to now be in relationship with, like grafted, 537 00:26:28,880 --> 00:26:32,760 Speaker 2: adopted into this family with him, and it's beautiful like that. 538 00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:33,680 Speaker 1: He's the gift. 539 00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:37,040 Speaker 4: It is. Yeah, it is like this life, this like 540 00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:39,240 Speaker 4: being here, being alive. What a gift it is. 541 00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:42,560 Speaker 3: But then the real gift is to know who gives 542 00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:45,320 Speaker 3: us that life, and he gives us that everlasting life 543 00:26:45,320 --> 00:26:45,720 Speaker 3: as well. 544 00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:47,800 Speaker 4: That's the hope. Oh. I could talk about this all day. 545 00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:51,399 Speaker 1: I know me too. Unfortunately we can't. 546 00:26:51,560 --> 00:26:53,080 Speaker 2: I know that you're about to go speak at a 547 00:26:53,119 --> 00:26:55,679 Speaker 2: conference and the people who are listening to this podcast 548 00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:57,920 Speaker 2: are like, Okay, Kirby, we're about to hit that thirty 549 00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:01,119 Speaker 2: minute mark. But are there any last things. I know 550 00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:03,680 Speaker 2: that your book entails a lot, but are there any 551 00:27:03,760 --> 00:27:06,159 Speaker 2: last things where it's like, oh, I do want to 552 00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:08,280 Speaker 2: like say this one point here, or this is something 553 00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:09,879 Speaker 2: I talk about in the book that I'm really passionate 554 00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:11,920 Speaker 2: about that we didn't get to. I just want to 555 00:27:11,920 --> 00:27:15,240 Speaker 2: tee that up to you to leave any final encouragement. 556 00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:18,760 Speaker 3: What if I closed with a poem from the book 557 00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:21,760 Speaker 3: A Short Thing, Yes, do it okay? I like I 558 00:27:21,760 --> 00:27:24,040 Speaker 3: think I quoted this poem like four times in our conversation. 559 00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:26,320 Speaker 3: That's because we were talking about hope. This is a 560 00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,880 Speaker 3: page titled what I mean Is, and it goes like this. 561 00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:33,840 Speaker 3: When I say everything will be okay, what I mean 562 00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:37,600 Speaker 3: is in the end, everything will be okay. Along the way, 563 00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:40,520 Speaker 3: it will not all be okay. You already know this. 564 00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:44,800 Speaker 3: There'll be sadness and death and failure. There'll be brokenness 565 00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:48,680 Speaker 3: in moments that feel beyond repair. There'll be pain and 566 00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:51,840 Speaker 3: fear and unwanted change is to your story. There will 567 00:27:51,840 --> 00:27:54,359 Speaker 3: be seasons when you feel far from okay, in moments 568 00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:57,080 Speaker 3: when you wonder if the last line of this poem 569 00:27:57,200 --> 00:28:00,080 Speaker 3: is true. Of the little I know, one thing I 570 00:27:59,920 --> 00:28:03,040 Speaker 3: know for sure, through it all, there is hope. And 571 00:28:03,119 --> 00:28:06,000 Speaker 3: hope invites us to lean in and hold fast to 572 00:28:06,080 --> 00:28:09,119 Speaker 3: a light that continues to last. It moves us to 573 00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:13,639 Speaker 3: love and dream and give and continue and stay for 574 00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:17,639 Speaker 3: another day. It leads us to pray and forgive and 575 00:28:17,680 --> 00:28:20,920 Speaker 3: cling to grace and believe the last line of this 576 00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:25,680 Speaker 3: poem is true, everything will be okay, even if everything 577 00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:27,400 Speaker 3: isn't okay today. 578 00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:30,280 Speaker 1: That's so good. 579 00:28:30,680 --> 00:28:33,399 Speaker 2: I'm so excited for people to read the book, to 580 00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:36,520 Speaker 2: read the different poems, just the short stories, everything that 581 00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:39,040 Speaker 2: you share in it, even a little like the pull 582 00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:42,040 Speaker 2: quotes that are throughout the book are really good. Where 583 00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,800 Speaker 2: can people pre order it? Because it's coming out soon, right, 584 00:28:44,880 --> 00:28:45,239 Speaker 2: isn't it? 585 00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:48,640 Speaker 3: February seventeenth, February seventeenth, Michael Jordan's birthday. 586 00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:49,400 Speaker 4: You can get it. 587 00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:52,280 Speaker 3: On Amazon or really anywhere else you pre order books. 588 00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:54,400 Speaker 3: You aren't gonna miss it because it is a very 589 00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:57,280 Speaker 3: orange book. It has an orange on the cover and 590 00:28:57,360 --> 00:28:58,600 Speaker 3: the cover is also orange. 591 00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:00,280 Speaker 4: It's very orange. Yeah. 592 00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:02,800 Speaker 3: It's titled Getting Through what You're going Through And you 593 00:29:02,800 --> 00:29:06,440 Speaker 3: can get an Amazon, Barnes and Noble anywhere, and I'd 594 00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:08,040 Speaker 3: be very honored if you grab a copy. 595 00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:11,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, y'all should definitely grab a copy. And where can 596 00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:12,280 Speaker 1: people keep up with you? 597 00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:14,600 Speaker 2: Because I know that you're posting on socials and doing 598 00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:15,640 Speaker 2: all the things online too. 599 00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:16,720 Speaker 4: Yeah. 600 00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:18,640 Speaker 3: I put a lot of stuff on Instagram. You can 601 00:29:18,640 --> 00:29:21,080 Speaker 3: follow me at Written to Speak or check out my 602 00:29:21,120 --> 00:29:23,960 Speaker 3: substack as well. You know, just like anybody who you 603 00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:26,600 Speaker 3: know writes books these days, we have stuff all over 604 00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:28,800 Speaker 3: the place. Just if you type in my name, you'll 605 00:29:28,800 --> 00:29:31,560 Speaker 3: probably find it. Or there's like a wrestler I think 606 00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:33,600 Speaker 3: in Nebraska who is also Tanner Olsen. 607 00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:36,120 Speaker 4: And yeah, he's doing great. 608 00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:38,920 Speaker 3: I think based off of the Google alerts that I 609 00:29:38,920 --> 00:29:40,640 Speaker 3: get for him, he's doing wonderful this season. 610 00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:43,560 Speaker 1: You should send him a book. Yeah, maybe he need it. 611 00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:45,959 Speaker 1: You wrestle in with other things, buddy. 612 00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:50,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, oh my gosh, that's awesome. Yeah, No, y'all need 613 00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:53,080 Speaker 2: to check out get his book. But y'all need to 614 00:29:53,120 --> 00:29:55,160 Speaker 2: check out his instagram especially. I feel like I share 615 00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:56,160 Speaker 2: your graphics all the time. 616 00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:59,040 Speaker 1: I'm like, this is so good. But thank you everything 617 00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:00,560 Speaker 1: you do. It's honestly phenomenal. 618 00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:02,760 Speaker 2: But thank you for taking the time to be here 619 00:30:02,800 --> 00:30:06,080 Speaker 2: on the podcast of pouring into everybody who is listening, 620 00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:07,560 Speaker 2: and to everyone who listened. 621 00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:11,040 Speaker 1: I hope that I hope, I really do hope. 622 00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:14,880 Speaker 2: And pray that the Lord just continues to move in 623 00:30:14,960 --> 00:30:18,120 Speaker 2: your life, work in your life, and if you haven't 624 00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:20,719 Speaker 2: seen that, that he gives you the eyes to see 625 00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:24,400 Speaker 2: how he is, because truly, he is moving in ways 626 00:30:24,400 --> 00:30:26,160 Speaker 2: that we don't often expect. 627 00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:28,840 Speaker 1: Or look to notice. I pray he helps you to 628 00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:31,120 Speaker 1: notice those things this week. I love you guys. 629 00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:32,760 Speaker 2: I'll see you here next week for another episode on 630 00:30:32,760 --> 00:30:37,640 Speaker 2: the Bottom Beloved podcast. But until then, Tootles love youa bye. 631 00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:41,840 Speaker 2: For more life giving, faith based podcast just like this one, 632 00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:45,080 Speaker 2: check out lifeaudio dot com, a proud partner of the 633 00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:48,600 Speaker 2: Botan Beloved podcast