WEBVTT - Your Husband's NOT a Pervert 0:00:00.560 --> 0:00:03.320 Today's episode of Timeless Wisdom. 0:00:03.800 --> 0:00:07.920 Why are we made to feel like freaks? If if 0:00:07.960 --> 0:00:08.920 we need sex? 0:00:09.119 --> 0:00:11.600 I mean, who's making you feel wait? Wait wait wait 0:00:11.640 --> 0:00:12.360 wait wait. 0:00:12.560 --> 0:00:14.040 That's that's how we feel lot. 0:00:14.240 --> 0:00:16.680 No, no, okay, there are two separate there are three 0:00:16.760 --> 0:00:19.560 separate issues. But let me tell you who, who, God forbid, 0:00:19.640 --> 0:00:21.120 is making you feel like a freak? 0:00:21.640 --> 0:00:23.000 Me, my husband. 0:00:23.680 --> 0:00:27.720 Oh okay, that's coming up on Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. 0:00:28.440 --> 0:00:32.760 Welcome to Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Here thousands of 0:00:32.800 --> 0:00:36.400 hours of Dennis's lectures courses in classic radio programs. Had 0:00:36.440 --> 0:00:41.159 to purchase Dennis Prager's Rational Bibles, go to Dennisprager dot com. 0:00:41.479 --> 0:00:42.360 I'm old fashioned. 0:00:42.400 --> 0:00:43.440 I like two sexes. 0:00:44.440 --> 0:00:46.120 I don't know, I think all of a sudden, I don't. 0:00:46.000 --> 0:00:47.960 Like being married to what is known as a new woman. 0:00:48.280 --> 0:00:49.920 I want a wife, not a competitor. 0:00:50.040 --> 0:00:53.519 Competitor, competitor, talk about a bit, this crying in the 0:00:53.560 --> 0:00:54.160 morning thing. 0:00:54.160 --> 0:00:56.240 It's depression, you know, let's get that fixed. 0:00:56.360 --> 0:00:57.760 That's me, isn't it what? 0:00:58.600 --> 0:01:00.840 Unless you've got the answer, let's you can say. 0:01:01.160 --> 0:01:03.520 Oh, I know this bloke in the essex rodical fixer, 0:01:03.880 --> 0:01:06.160 and there's my point bothering, How. 0:01:05.959 --> 0:01:07.399 Do you write women so well? 0:01:08.319 --> 0:01:11.440 I think of a man and I take away reason 0:01:11.760 --> 0:01:12.720 and accountability. 0:01:13.280 --> 0:01:14.240 I love him. 0:01:14.360 --> 0:01:16.160 I love him and I don't care what you think. 0:01:16.440 --> 0:01:19.440 I love him for the for the man he wants 0:01:19.520 --> 0:01:21.640 to be, and I love him for the man that 0:01:21.760 --> 0:01:23.200 he almost is. 0:01:23.640 --> 0:01:26.440 What do people have rowse about him? Money? 0:01:27.000 --> 0:01:32.760 Sex, sex, money he wants, she doesn't want, she wants, 0:01:32.800 --> 0:01:34.319 he doesn't want women. 0:01:35.120 --> 0:01:37.319 I've always been a big problem to me. 0:01:37.760 --> 0:01:43.240 Doctor fusspend by listening. Doctor yes, yes, yes, go on, b. 0:01:49.960 --> 0:01:52.600 Hi, everybody, Welcome to the Male Female Hour on the 0:01:52.640 --> 0:01:55.920 Dennis Brager Show. Every week at this hour, I talk 0:01:56.000 --> 0:01:59.320 about men and women. I call it the Male Female Hour. 0:01:59.360 --> 0:02:02.360 I've explained that, and I won't now because I'm getting 0:02:02.440 --> 0:02:07.040 into a subject that is very delicate, as it often 0:02:07.240 --> 0:02:10.840 is on this topic. What gives me the courage, and 0:02:10.960 --> 0:02:16.000 it takes some courage to do this is your reaction. Frankly, 0:02:16.400 --> 0:02:20.440 your reactions have been so powerful. I will read to 0:02:20.520 --> 0:02:26.360 you a letter from a woman married fourteen years, and. 0:02:28.080 --> 0:02:28.480 It is. 0:02:30.200 --> 0:02:32.280 The reason for my hesitation is because I have to 0:02:32.480 --> 0:02:37.320 announce this is not this hour will not be for 0:02:37.720 --> 0:02:43.119 little kids. I think it is your call on early teenage, 0:02:43.400 --> 0:02:47.799 mid teenage and older. I think it could be useful. 0:02:47.840 --> 0:02:50.880 I mean, the kids are not living in submarines these days. 0:02:51.880 --> 0:02:56.519 But I just need to tell you that if they're 0:02:57.040 --> 0:03:01.799 under teenage, I don't think that this is for them, so, 0:03:02.919 --> 0:03:05.520 but it is for you if you have a little kid. 0:03:05.639 --> 0:03:08.480 So either send the kid out of the room, you know, 0:03:08.639 --> 0:03:13.079 if you're driving, just drop the kid off somewhere. Come 0:03:13.160 --> 0:03:17.600 back on the freeway later I'll have the kid. Send 0:03:17.639 --> 0:03:22.239 the kid to some mall shop. Because I really want 0:03:22.280 --> 0:03:26.200 you to hear this. All right, listen to this letter here. 0:03:26.520 --> 0:03:30.320 And I won't even give her first name, nor her 0:03:30.400 --> 0:03:33.400 husband's name, let alone even the city. All right, but 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:36.920 here is a letter that I received very recently. Dear 0:03:37.000 --> 0:03:40.120 mister Prager, I have been married for fourteen years to 0:03:40.240 --> 0:03:46.360 my husband. Are okay, and we have two young boys. 0:03:47.560 --> 0:03:51.800 My husband is listening to your show on a regular basis, 0:03:52.360 --> 0:03:54.920 and he is quoting you quite often. 0:03:57.040 --> 0:03:58.760 By the way, Well, it doesn't matter. 0:03:58.800 --> 0:04:00.840 I have a feeling that it's a year and woman here, 0:04:00.920 --> 0:04:03.320 but I'm not certain about it any It doesn't matter really. 0:04:03.920 --> 0:04:05.880 He has made many attempts for me to listen to 0:04:06.000 --> 0:04:11.200 your shows, but without success. He recently became more creative 0:04:11.280 --> 0:04:15.360 and started downloading your podcasts than putting them in my 0:04:15.600 --> 0:04:21.600 car CD player. That, by the way, is worthy of 0:04:21.960 --> 0:04:25.600 its own topic. The efforts that this man made to 0:04:25.800 --> 0:04:30.000 have his wife here this show. And it could go 0:04:30.120 --> 0:04:32.600 in both directions, by the way, often it's the wife 0:04:32.760 --> 0:04:37.040 wanting the husband to I am as convinced as one 0:04:37.160 --> 0:04:39.360 can be that I have a fifty to fifty male 0:04:39.440 --> 0:04:43.400 female audience. But this man did not give up to 0:04:43.560 --> 0:04:47.600 his credit for and you will see to his benefit. 0:04:48.400 --> 0:04:52.360 So first thing, when I start my car, bam, the 0:04:52.480 --> 0:04:55.800 Happy Hour song came on, and here goes Dennis Prager 0:04:55.839 --> 0:04:59.920 singing along. I thought of my husband and told myself, okay, honey, 0:05:00.480 --> 0:05:03.560 you put a smile on my face. That's cute, but 0:05:03.680 --> 0:05:08.320 I shut it off. I am a bit stubborn, but 0:05:08.480 --> 0:05:13.240 so is my husband. He then recorded for me the 0:05:13.360 --> 0:05:15.920 Male Hour. Isn't that funny that she calls it the 0:05:16.000 --> 0:05:16.480 veil hour? 0:05:16.640 --> 0:05:19.720 It's called the female hour, But that's what that's the 0:05:19.800 --> 0:05:20.600 part she heard. 0:05:22.680 --> 0:05:25.360 And this time I actually listened to you, mister Prager. 0:05:26.240 --> 0:05:28.800 And when I heard these women calling and telling how 0:05:28.839 --> 0:05:31.279 their husbands were pursuing them and never. 0:05:31.240 --> 0:05:32.279 Could get enough of them. 0:05:33.120 --> 0:05:38.480 I was shocked and immediately realized that my husband was 0:05:38.640 --> 0:05:45.560 not a pervert obsessed with having all with having relations 0:05:45.640 --> 0:05:51.120 with me. I understood my husband and realized how much 0:05:51.279 --> 0:05:55.960 he she capitalizes. He loves me and only me, and 0:05:56.160 --> 0:06:01.000 I immediately felt bad, felt bad for nickolecting my husband, 0:06:01.720 --> 0:06:04.640 felt bad for thinking that he was only lusting after me, 0:06:05.600 --> 0:06:10.000 And I started and started telling myself how selfish I 0:06:10.120 --> 0:06:13.120 have been all these years, how devoted. 0:06:12.720 --> 0:06:13.320 He is to me. 0:06:13.480 --> 0:06:16.680 Every day that goes by, every day he has been 0:06:16.760 --> 0:06:19.280 telling me he loves me, and how pretty I am 0:06:19.520 --> 0:06:22.000 and how hot I am. And I always thought that 0:06:22.080 --> 0:06:24.400 he was saying that because he wanted something from me. 0:06:26.520 --> 0:06:29.920 How much time have I wasted in my marriage? But 0:06:30.200 --> 0:06:33.480 now I look at him and I truly feel special. 0:06:34.600 --> 0:06:37.240 I truly know he loves me and only me, and 0:06:37.400 --> 0:06:41.000 I love him more and only him. I get it, 0:06:41.120 --> 0:06:43.880 mister Prager, I get it, and I thank you to 0:06:44.000 --> 0:06:50.240 opening my eyes to a truly wonderful, loving husband. This 0:06:51.360 --> 0:06:57.320 for this letter alone, I am beyond happy that I 0:06:57.440 --> 0:07:02.560 made the male female hour if. But when you multiply 0:07:02.720 --> 0:07:08.040 this by thousands, two things happen. One, I realize how 0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:10.680 important it is to talk about these things, as difficult 0:07:10.720 --> 0:07:14.920 as it might be, and it is difficult. The other 0:07:15.240 --> 0:07:19.960 thing that I realize is how many millions, millions are 0:07:20.080 --> 0:07:25.160 suffering needlessly in their marriages. There are two tie I 0:07:25.200 --> 0:07:28.360 always say this, folks, there are two types of suffering. 0:07:29.680 --> 0:07:32.640 There is that which exists. There is the built in 0:07:32.840 --> 0:07:37.880 suffering that is inevitable to life. And there is gratuitous suffering, 0:07:38.440 --> 0:07:43.520 suffering we create for no good reason. There are millions 0:07:43.640 --> 0:07:48.120 of couples who have suffering, and there are millions of 0:07:48.200 --> 0:07:54.280 couples who have gratuitous suffering. There are so many aspects 0:07:54.360 --> 0:07:57.160 to this letter that I want to concentrate on and 0:07:57.320 --> 0:08:00.960 talk to you about on this edition of The Male 0:08:01.240 --> 0:08:06.760 Female Hour. One is the notion my husband's a pervert, 0:08:08.600 --> 0:08:11.000 my husband is over sex, hyper sex. 0:08:10.880 --> 0:08:14.240 A pervert, whatever it is that you might think. 0:08:15.040 --> 0:08:18.880 The odds are, my friends, the odds are that your 0:08:18.960 --> 0:08:23.680 husband is in fact not a pervert. Okay, just know 0:08:23.840 --> 0:08:27.360 that the odds are. What he is is a male. 0:08:28.200 --> 0:08:30.520 And if he's a male and he's not like you, 0:08:31.080 --> 0:08:33.320 that doesn't make him a pervert. It makes him a male. 0:08:35.480 --> 0:08:39.680 That's a Now there are guys who are I don't 0:08:39.679 --> 0:08:41.640 know if the word pervert even I'm sure there are, 0:08:42.600 --> 0:08:45.360 but although it's not what the world's easiest term to 0:08:45.480 --> 0:08:49.079 define one, one person's pervert is another person's adventurous lover. 0:08:49.840 --> 0:08:53.040 So that's a very very difficult term and not a 0:08:53.200 --> 0:08:56.240 very useful one, in my opinion, not a very useful 0:08:56.320 --> 0:08:59.760 one to use. And calling your husband that may not 0:09:00.400 --> 0:09:06.160 may not, shall we say, lead to a warmer marriage. Now, 0:09:06.280 --> 0:09:10.280 that's not to say that there are men who ask 0:09:10.440 --> 0:09:14.800 for things or something else that may be over the top. 0:09:15.600 --> 0:09:20.720 I'm sure that's true. But the average guy may albay 0:09:20.880 --> 0:09:25.319 seem like a pervert to the average woman when he 0:09:25.440 --> 0:09:26.160 is in fact not. 0:09:26.480 --> 0:09:27.319 He's just not you. 0:09:27.480 --> 0:09:31.000 It's almost like the average kid. The average boy probably 0:09:31.080 --> 0:09:36.200 seems like an incipient, you know, mall shooter when all 0:09:36.240 --> 0:09:38.480 he's doing is walking around with a gun and the 0:09:38.559 --> 0:09:40.880 mother is horrified. A toy gun, not a real gun. 0:09:41.360 --> 0:09:44.560 The average mother is horrified, Oh my god, my boy's 0:09:44.600 --> 0:09:45.959 walking around with his toy gun. 0:09:46.080 --> 0:09:48.400 He makes everything into a gun. Is he going to 0:09:48.520 --> 0:09:52.120 kill people? No, he's not. He's a boy. Boys like 0:09:52.240 --> 0:09:53.000 to shoot guns. 0:09:55.480 --> 0:09:58.040 One of the most important things is for each sex 0:09:58.120 --> 0:09:59.880 to know that they are not the other sex, but 0:10:00.040 --> 0:10:03.040 it's particularly important. I think men are far more aware 0:10:03.120 --> 0:10:06.280 that women are not they and do not have to 0:10:06.320 --> 0:10:10.199 be them than women are vice versa. We are not 0:10:10.480 --> 0:10:14.560 We are not hairy females, and we shouldn't be made 0:10:14.600 --> 0:10:17.280 into it, and we men should not allow you to 0:10:17.360 --> 0:10:21.800 make us into it. That's that's another issue. So number one, 0:10:22.040 --> 0:10:25.679 the number one point of this letter and why it 0:10:25.840 --> 0:10:28.560 was so touching, touching to me because now she realizes 0:10:28.640 --> 0:10:33.120 how much her husband loves her, he wanted relations more 0:10:33.200 --> 0:10:33.800 than she did. 0:10:34.559 --> 0:10:36.319 What a shock? What a shock? 0:10:36.440 --> 0:10:41.199 I mean, God, is that is this the only marriage 0:10:41.520 --> 0:10:44.640 that this happens to? I mean, obviously it happens so often, 0:10:45.040 --> 0:10:47.480 and she just thinking, Ah, this guy is the lust. 0:10:47.360 --> 0:10:49.240 Machine, and then so on. Then she will wait a minute, 0:10:49.280 --> 0:10:51.920 he wants me, he wants me. 0:10:54.280 --> 0:10:58.400 That that's beautiful, that's beautiful, it's not sick, it's not perverted. 0:10:59.520 --> 0:11:01.839 Now does that mean that there can't be limits or 0:11:01.880 --> 0:11:04.320 should be limits all right? Or we don't take both 0:11:04.400 --> 0:11:08.000 sexes into account? One eight Praguer seven seven six. I'll 0:11:08.040 --> 0:11:10.600 tell you more reasons why this is such an important letter, 0:11:10.880 --> 0:11:11.880 and I'll take your calls. 0:11:13.480 --> 0:11:16.760 This episode of timeless Wisdom will continue right after this. 0:11:22.320 --> 0:11:25.880 Now back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom. 0:11:26.120 --> 0:11:28.559 Hi, everybody, you're listening to the Dennis Praguer Show, The 0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:30.640 Male Female Hour. I didn't give you the number one 0:11:30.760 --> 0:11:34.959 eight Praguer seven seven six. I fully acknowledge that the 0:11:35.080 --> 0:11:38.800 intent of this hour is to help the sexes understand 0:11:38.880 --> 0:11:42.640 each other and ideally help your marriages. I can't do that, 0:11:42.920 --> 0:11:46.080 and nobody can do that if we don't address real 0:11:46.200 --> 0:11:47.680 issues between men and women. 0:11:48.400 --> 0:11:50.520 Sex is one of them. This is not an hour for. 0:11:50.760 --> 0:11:54.280 Your kids under the under teenage years. I announced that 0:11:54.360 --> 0:11:56.800 at the outset, and I'm reminding you in case you 0:11:56.920 --> 0:12:01.640 didn't hear it then or well, actually, I can't remind 0:12:01.720 --> 0:12:05.160 you if you didn't hear it then, I see. I'm 0:12:05.280 --> 0:12:08.320 very precise, so much so I drive myself nuts sometimes. 0:12:08.840 --> 0:12:10.800 I am telling you for the first time, if you 0:12:10.840 --> 0:12:12.760 didn't hear it, then, I'm reminding you if you did 0:12:12.840 --> 0:12:13.880 hear it then and didn't. 0:12:13.679 --> 0:12:14.160 Act on it. 0:12:15.080 --> 0:12:15.240 Oh. 0:12:18.160 --> 0:12:20.800 I have a number of letters with the exact same 0:12:21.040 --> 0:12:23.920 point I read to you one. I'll read to you 0:12:24.280 --> 0:12:28.760 just an excerpt from this one. Let's see here and 0:12:28.920 --> 0:12:32.000 appreciate the difference between what a difference. You have relieved 0:12:32.080 --> 0:12:34.800 my mind thinking my husband was a pervert all those 0:12:34.880 --> 0:12:36.200 early years of my marriage. 0:12:36.320 --> 0:12:37.600 I love him more. 0:12:37.840 --> 0:12:42.319 Thanks. And this is another wife. Do you think your 0:12:42.360 --> 0:12:44.679 husband's a pervert? Now here's the problem with doing this 0:12:44.800 --> 0:12:49.199 on the radio. I can't you can't spell out specific 0:12:49.760 --> 0:12:53.560 desires that he might have because it is. 0:12:53.640 --> 0:12:54.920 Still public radio. 0:12:55.040 --> 0:12:58.120 I don't mean you know public NPR, but it is 0:12:58.200 --> 0:13:02.840 still public radio, and it is still family radio. Nevertheless, 0:13:03.600 --> 0:13:06.000 but I do want you to address this issue in 0:13:06.080 --> 0:13:09.440 your mind, or address it with me a man man 0:13:09.640 --> 0:13:14.200 and not a woman. And this letter was so powerful 0:13:14.280 --> 0:13:17.319 to me, the one that I had originally read to you, 0:13:17.840 --> 0:13:21.360 and how bad she now feels thinking this way about him. 0:13:22.600 --> 0:13:25.160 Let's take some calls here and we begin with the 0:13:25.240 --> 0:13:30.000 Los Angeles and Linda. Linda, Dennis Prager, thank you for calling. 0:13:30.960 --> 0:13:32.040 Good morning, Dennis. 0:13:32.240 --> 0:13:32.360 Hi. 0:13:33.600 --> 0:13:34.080 I just. 0:13:36.280 --> 0:13:40.280 Want to say that I hope a lot of women 0:13:40.360 --> 0:13:42.720 don't make the same mistake I did. I was married 0:13:42.800 --> 0:13:45.760 for thirty years and then I lost my husband to cancer. 0:13:46.640 --> 0:13:49.959 In the last few years, I didn't give in to him. 0:13:51.440 --> 0:13:56.640 And I know now after listening to you and doctor Laura, 0:13:56.760 --> 0:14:00.600 because she says the same thing. That's right, that they 0:14:00.760 --> 0:14:06.320 love us and they're so simple, and I'm so sad. 0:14:10.240 --> 0:14:13.719 Go on, eat through your tears, and I'm keeping you 0:14:13.840 --> 0:14:16.960 on because your message is so important. 0:14:18.240 --> 0:14:23.120 He was a wonderful man and he wasn't a pervert 0:14:23.200 --> 0:14:23.480 at all. 0:14:24.600 --> 0:14:36.480 He was gentle and kind and I was selfish. Oh please, ladies, 0:14:36.560 --> 0:14:38.240 let him love you and love him back. 0:14:40.080 --> 0:14:42.840 God bless you. You see. I do want you to 0:14:42.960 --> 0:14:49.800 know this in some way. What you can't do now 0:14:49.960 --> 0:14:53.560 for him, you are doing for others, and that that 0:14:53.760 --> 0:14:58.960 is so important. You're turning a mistake. It was, and 0:14:59.040 --> 0:14:59.760 it was a mistake. 0:14:59.840 --> 0:15:03.560 You you didn't have ill intent, but you're turning into 0:15:03.640 --> 0:15:13.920 a mistake into a blessing for others. I think it 0:15:14.080 --> 0:15:16.760 was one of the very first male female hours when 0:15:16.960 --> 0:15:22.120 I did this cover the subject that for the vast 0:15:22.200 --> 0:15:26.160 majority of men, no matter how much you are kind 0:15:26.360 --> 0:15:29.600 and loving and what a wonderful wife and mom and 0:15:29.760 --> 0:15:35.840 whatever else you are, if if you don't give him sex, 0:15:36.640 --> 0:15:42.720 he doesn't know you love him. You can call it simplistic. 0:15:42.880 --> 0:15:47.040 You can call it animalistic, you can call it male, 0:15:47.320 --> 0:15:51.960 you can call it anything you want. It's either true 0:15:52.120 --> 0:15:55.760 or not true. You can add your editorial comments all 0:15:55.880 --> 0:15:58.800 you like in your mind or with your girlfriends. 0:16:00.480 --> 0:16:03.760 The question is not to editorialize on what I just said. 0:16:04.280 --> 0:16:07.840 It's to it's to confront whether or not it is true. 0:16:08.400 --> 0:16:11.240 That is the is the single biggest way he knows 0:16:11.320 --> 0:16:15.320 you love him. You have ways in which he can 0:16:15.400 --> 0:16:20.160 show he loves you, and that's not one of them, 0:16:20.240 --> 0:16:23.120 by and large, as it happens, it's It may be 0:16:23.320 --> 0:16:26.360 on the list, but it's not top. It's not on 0:16:26.440 --> 0:16:28.440 the top of the list for the vast majority of women. 0:16:28.520 --> 0:16:29.360 For some women, it is. 0:16:29.880 --> 0:16:32.840 I can only talk in broad generalities. I can't talk 0:16:32.840 --> 0:16:41.000 about every human being under the sun. And these letters 0:16:41.080 --> 0:16:46.120 and and the call you just heard, and I am 0:16:46.200 --> 0:16:48.560 sure the marriages that are lost because of this. 0:16:51.600 --> 0:16:52.080 Is uh. 0:16:54.800 --> 0:16:57.280 Is just this is what I called the gratuitous pain 0:16:57.920 --> 0:16:58.400 of life. 0:17:02.040 --> 0:17:06.560 And let's go to National Park, New Jersey and John, 0:17:06.600 --> 0:17:09.760 the phone number here is one eighth Pregger seven seven six. 0:17:09.840 --> 0:17:12.520 Hello John, Dennis Prager, Hi Dennis. 0:17:12.200 --> 0:17:13.160 Thanks for taking my call. 0:17:13.359 --> 0:17:13.680 Thank you. 0:17:15.160 --> 0:17:17.440 I think I was listening to the letter that the 0:17:17.520 --> 0:17:21.360 woman wrote to you, and it really sounded good. When 0:17:21.440 --> 0:17:23.280 I was a boy, when I was coming of age, 0:17:24.000 --> 0:17:27.080 my dad was not around, so my mom gave me 0:17:27.240 --> 0:17:30.159 the father and son talking, and I think it was 0:17:30.200 --> 0:17:32.359 an advantage for me because I got it from a 0:17:32.400 --> 0:17:37.040 woman's point of view. I remember her saying that there 0:17:37.080 --> 0:17:39.200 were times when her and my dad would have sex 0:17:39.520 --> 0:17:42.000 and afterwards he would roll over and go to sleep. 0:17:42.760 --> 0:17:45.680 And ever since then, that's always stayed in my mind 0:17:45.800 --> 0:17:49.200 that one of my goals when I'm with a woman 0:17:49.400 --> 0:17:53.720 is to please her. A lot of women have commented 0:17:53.800 --> 0:17:56.840 on that. One in particular, it said that she liked 0:17:56.880 --> 0:17:59.720 the way that I kept kissing and touching her even 0:17:59.760 --> 0:18:03.760 after or I was done, And I said there were uh, well, 0:18:03.880 --> 0:18:06.240 some men like to roll over and go to sleep, 0:18:06.280 --> 0:18:07.800 and she said, yeah, like my ex husband. 0:18:08.280 --> 0:18:11.160 Well, by the way, that's a very very valid point, 0:18:11.520 --> 0:18:14.480 very very valid. Men. 0:18:14.960 --> 0:18:18.040 Uh, this is not exactly asking you to swim the 0:18:18.119 --> 0:18:23.280 English channel. To continue to embrace and and and speak 0:18:23.400 --> 0:18:29.480 lovingly and for God's sake, stay awake. I don't think 0:18:29.560 --> 0:18:33.159 that that is too too grated. The bad on you guys. 0:18:34.119 --> 0:18:39.160 Once once your wife has has been that giving even 0:18:39.200 --> 0:18:41.159 though she's not in the mood. And what did they 0:18:41.200 --> 0:18:43.119 assess recently that a woman is in the mood? What 0:18:43.840 --> 0:18:48.280 eight hours a month or something? Just absolutely spontaneously aching 0:18:48.440 --> 0:18:53.040 for relations. I mean depending on age, obviously, some some 0:18:53.320 --> 0:18:56.280 you know a great deal of time obviously, but we're 0:18:56.320 --> 0:18:59.320 talking in the broad, the broad spectrum of men and women. 0:19:00.520 --> 0:19:03.040 So yes, that would be a great example of how 0:19:03.160 --> 0:19:05.800 you reciprocate for what is meaningful to her. 0:19:06.520 --> 0:19:11.119 What the key in life and in marriage. 0:19:11.000 --> 0:19:13.440 Is you do for the other what the other considers 0:19:13.480 --> 0:19:20.040 important when when possible, obviously, and mood can't be the issue. 0:19:22.880 --> 0:19:23.480 No, I don't know. 0:19:23.600 --> 0:19:25.400 Woman who says I'm not in the mood to get 0:19:25.480 --> 0:19:29.439 up the baby is crying will be what if your 0:19:29.560 --> 0:19:32.240 husband is crying? This is the Dennis Prager Show. 0:19:33.480 --> 0:19:36.720 This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this. 0:19:42.320 --> 0:19:45.880 Now back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom. 0:19:46.359 --> 0:19:48.879 Hi, everybody, this is the Male Female Hour on the 0:19:48.920 --> 0:19:51.960 Dennis Prager Show. I read to you, and I'll reread 0:19:52.760 --> 0:19:56.760 a bit of it here a letter, and I have 0:19:57.160 --> 0:19:59.960 two letters using the exact same word. Women who thought 0:20:00.080 --> 0:20:04.160 their husbands were perverts because of the frequency that they would. 0:20:03.960 --> 0:20:05.080 Want or whatever. 0:20:06.880 --> 0:20:09.040 And the odds are, folks, that you're not married to 0:20:09.119 --> 0:20:17.080 a pervert. Okay, the odds are, and you're married to 0:20:17.240 --> 0:20:23.320 a male I've been married to my husband fourteen years, 0:20:23.400 --> 0:20:27.000 two young sons. And she explained how she he has 0:20:27.080 --> 0:20:30.400 been working to get her to listen to the show. 0:20:30.880 --> 0:20:32.639 He would even put it on so that when she 0:20:32.760 --> 0:20:36.560 turned on the podcast to turn on her car CD 0:20:36.760 --> 0:20:37.760 player up. 0:20:37.720 --> 0:20:41.160 I would come anyway. 0:20:41.320 --> 0:20:48.000 She finally started listening, and she said, let's see, I 0:20:48.119 --> 0:20:50.760 actually listened to you. And when I heard these women 0:20:50.880 --> 0:20:53.520 calling and telling you how their husbands were pursuing them 0:20:53.600 --> 0:20:55.600 and could never get enough of them, I was shocked 0:20:55.600 --> 0:20:58.399 and immediately realized that my husband was not a pervert 0:20:58.480 --> 0:21:03.919 obsessed with having sex with me. I understood my husband 0:21:04.000 --> 0:21:06.399 and realized how much he loves me and only me. 0:21:06.640 --> 0:21:09.879 I immediately felt bad, felt bad from neglecting my husband, 0:21:09.960 --> 0:21:12.560 felt bad for thinking he was only lusting after me. 0:21:14.560 --> 0:21:17.320 And by the way, I hope that your husbands do, 0:21:17.520 --> 0:21:22.639 my dear female listeners. And I started telling myself how 0:21:22.720 --> 0:21:24.920 selfish I have been all these years, how devoted he 0:21:25.000 --> 0:21:31.240 is to me every day that goes by, and that 0:21:31.680 --> 0:21:34.680 he's not a pervert, and so on. It's likewise another 0:21:34.800 --> 0:21:39.280 letter that I'm read to you. You have relieved my 0:21:39.440 --> 0:21:41.920 mind thinking my husband was a pervert all those early 0:21:42.000 --> 0:21:44.040 years of marriage. I love him more than you heard. 0:21:44.119 --> 0:21:49.600 This woman who just called now in tears. Her husband 0:21:50.119 --> 0:21:53.119 died a few years ago and she neglected him in 0:21:53.160 --> 0:21:57.960 that arena for some years and was just in tears 0:21:58.000 --> 0:22:02.440 of guilt of cancer. There's nothing that can be done. 0:22:02.760 --> 0:22:05.600 And my heart goes out to her, goes out to 0:22:05.800 --> 0:22:09.080 him for that time. Let's go to some more of 0:22:09.119 --> 0:22:12.040 your calls. By the way, I think all of you 0:22:12.200 --> 0:22:14.119 know this, but for those of you who might be 0:22:14.200 --> 0:22:17.639 brand new to the show, I'm not taking sides. My 0:22:17.800 --> 0:22:21.440 only side is that you have a better marriage. That's 0:22:21.480 --> 0:22:25.359 all that's my That's the side I care about. But 0:22:25.520 --> 0:22:30.720 that may involve understanding him better. And that's why I'm 0:22:30.760 --> 0:22:32.200 mentioning these things when I do. 0:22:32.880 --> 0:22:33.359 All right e. 0:22:33.480 --> 0:22:37.600 Jennifer in Manhattan Beach, California, Jennifer, Dennis Praeger, thanks for calling, 0:22:38.320 --> 0:22:38.720 Thanks for. 0:22:38.760 --> 0:22:42.440 Taking my call. I'm calling because you are right that 0:22:43.720 --> 0:22:46.520 for men, sex is a way of saying. 0:22:46.320 --> 0:22:46.760 I love you. 0:22:47.560 --> 0:22:50.960 And with that no, ironically, it isn't okay no, no, no. 0:22:51.320 --> 0:22:54.000 Sex is a way of them being told by you 0:22:54.280 --> 0:22:54.880 you love them. 0:22:55.160 --> 0:22:55.680 That's what I meant. 0:22:55.720 --> 0:22:57.960 I'm sorry, okay no, But it's an important distinction. 0:22:58.119 --> 0:23:00.680 Yes, right, okay, so you know we can say it 0:23:00.720 --> 0:23:02.600 to him all we want, it won't work. The only 0:23:02.680 --> 0:23:06.040 problem is, several years ago I started realizing that, Okay, 0:23:06.080 --> 0:23:08.800 if I don't feel like it's so what right, Okay, 0:23:09.000 --> 0:23:12.120 the happier camper. It's great in that respect, but outside 0:23:12.119 --> 0:23:15.560 of sex, now he's almost forgotten I'm a woman. It's 0:23:15.640 --> 0:23:16.240 like i'm a woman. 0:23:16.680 --> 0:23:20.359 I'm like a paral that goes to bed and all right, 0:23:21.359 --> 0:23:22.560 explain that even further. 0:23:24.440 --> 0:23:28.560 Well, for example, I mean, women liked to know that 0:23:28.640 --> 0:23:32.159 we're being thought about, that they're taking the trouble to 0:23:32.240 --> 0:23:35.920 do something that would please us. I mean, I don't 0:23:35.920 --> 0:23:38.119 even remember the last time that he say, grabbed me 0:23:38.200 --> 0:23:40.520 and gave me a hug, or I don't know, took 0:23:40.520 --> 0:23:41.960 me out to dinner of his own volition. 0:23:42.880 --> 0:23:43.720 Have you told him this? 0:23:44.600 --> 0:23:46.159 Yeah, I mean he says that he doesn't need to, 0:23:46.200 --> 0:23:47.240 and then you know he. 0:23:47.359 --> 0:23:48.000 Doesn't need to. 0:23:48.320 --> 0:23:51.480 Well well wait, see here's the deal, and I would 0:23:51.560 --> 0:23:53.639 like him to be told this, and I'd be happy 0:23:53.680 --> 0:23:56.199 to tell him this. If you feel you don't need 0:23:56.280 --> 0:23:58.960