1 00:00:20,156 --> 00:00:23,236 Speaker 1: Hi friend, I'm so glad you're here today. Let's learn 2 00:00:23,276 --> 00:00:26,916 Speaker 1: how to raise our kids to love God, respect authority, 3 00:00:27,196 --> 00:00:31,036 Speaker 1: and do what's right. Let's scroll less and live more. 4 00:00:31,356 --> 00:00:38,516 Speaker 1: I'm Arlene Pelicane and this is the Happy Home. Hey moms, 5 00:00:38,876 --> 00:00:41,956 Speaker 1: this one's for you and dads. This could also be 6 00:00:42,036 --> 00:00:44,915 Speaker 1: for you so you could understand your wife better. Seriously, 7 00:00:45,036 --> 00:00:46,356 Speaker 1: so lean in on this one. 8 00:00:46,516 --> 00:00:49,995 Speaker 2: I am with Abby Wedgeworth her new book. You guys 9 00:00:50,036 --> 00:00:50,516 Speaker 2: are gonna love. 10 00:00:50,516 --> 00:00:53,956 Speaker 1: This title is help I'm Ruining My Kids, A gospel 11 00:00:53,996 --> 00:00:57,075 Speaker 1: guide for the mom who's desperate for change. 12 00:00:57,196 --> 00:00:59,676 Speaker 3: Abby, Welcome, Thank you for having me this. 13 00:00:59,836 --> 00:01:03,755 Speaker 4: I'm so I love the promise of your podcast. I 14 00:01:03,836 --> 00:01:05,276 Speaker 4: just love it and I'm so pumped. 15 00:01:05,516 --> 00:01:06,676 Speaker 2: Oh that's all excitation. 16 00:01:06,876 --> 00:01:08,316 Speaker 4: I think it will also be a help to. 17 00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:09,916 Speaker 2: Me, oh for both of us. 18 00:01:10,116 --> 00:01:11,636 Speaker 1: So when I go to your Instagram, you know, we 19 00:01:11,676 --> 00:01:14,796 Speaker 1: have these amazing reels and I'm watching you look for 20 00:01:14,876 --> 00:01:18,516 Speaker 1: your book in Barnes and Nobles. Not just you, but 21 00:01:18,556 --> 00:01:20,916 Speaker 1: you are a blue outfit like please explain, and that 22 00:01:20,996 --> 00:01:22,075 Speaker 1: is the most adorable thing. 23 00:01:22,116 --> 00:01:23,675 Speaker 2: Just what's going through your mind as you're going through 24 00:01:23,676 --> 00:01:25,356 Speaker 2: the Barnes and Nobles and looking for your book? 25 00:01:25,596 --> 00:01:27,876 Speaker 4: Oh, you know what, I'm actually really glad you asked 26 00:01:27,875 --> 00:01:29,996 Speaker 4: that question, because I think it does not come through 27 00:01:30,075 --> 00:01:33,795 Speaker 4: in the video that I was mildly panicked. So they're 28 00:01:33,795 --> 00:01:35,756 Speaker 4: like a couple of things going on. One, I feel 29 00:01:35,836 --> 00:01:38,476 Speaker 4: so bad for my friend who has two young children 30 00:01:38,996 --> 00:01:41,075 Speaker 4: and is like, you haven't kind to go, Yeah, let's 31 00:01:41,116 --> 00:01:43,996 Speaker 4: go right now. And she's so tired and lives on 32 00:01:44,036 --> 00:01:46,476 Speaker 4: the mainland and drove all the way to the island 33 00:01:46,476 --> 00:01:48,556 Speaker 4: with me to do this, okay, So I'm like feeling 34 00:01:49,076 --> 00:01:51,956 Speaker 4: and burdening her. The other thing is I'm looking for 35 00:01:52,036 --> 00:01:53,796 Speaker 4: the book and I can't find it, and then I 36 00:01:53,796 --> 00:01:56,476 Speaker 4: feel kind of embarrassed because I'm like, oh, it's not 37 00:01:56,596 --> 00:02:01,156 Speaker 4: even here like this, it's small potatoes. They didn't order 38 00:02:01,196 --> 00:02:04,716 Speaker 4: any or whatever. And then when she gasped and it 39 00:02:04,756 --> 00:02:08,076 Speaker 4: was an end cap, I just was like, could have 40 00:02:08,196 --> 00:02:12,396 Speaker 4: just fallen down and worshiped just the kindness of God 41 00:02:12,836 --> 00:02:15,396 Speaker 4: that it was an end cap? Are you kidding me? 42 00:02:15,996 --> 00:02:19,956 Speaker 4: So generous? And the reason that that me to move 43 00:02:20,036 --> 00:02:23,996 Speaker 4: my heart to praise Arlen is because I have prayed 44 00:02:24,036 --> 00:02:26,796 Speaker 4: for this book to be on shelves, because my desire 45 00:02:27,076 --> 00:02:30,876 Speaker 4: is that it would reach the loosely churched mom who's 46 00:02:30,956 --> 00:02:33,476 Speaker 4: not looking for it. Yeah, so it was just a 47 00:02:33,516 --> 00:02:37,115 Speaker 4: particular kind less that I was just really grateful for. 48 00:02:37,756 --> 00:02:40,636 Speaker 1: Yeah, let me go there for a second. The like 49 00:02:40,675 --> 00:02:43,356 Speaker 1: the loosely churched Mom, right, which is so good. So 50 00:02:43,395 --> 00:02:45,036 Speaker 1: this is the kind of book you can give to 51 00:02:45,076 --> 00:02:48,316 Speaker 1: your friend that you could say, help I'm ruining my kids, 52 00:02:49,076 --> 00:02:51,715 Speaker 1: and a gospel guide. Now I'm going to go I'm 53 00:02:51,716 --> 00:02:53,516 Speaker 1: going to ask you about the Hybrid Classic, but I'm 54 00:02:53,555 --> 00:02:56,156 Speaker 1: going to put a put a little little pause on 55 00:02:56,196 --> 00:02:58,556 Speaker 1: that one. But we're going to go here first. So 56 00:02:59,356 --> 00:03:01,596 Speaker 1: you know, there's so much in this book that is 57 00:03:01,596 --> 00:03:04,596 Speaker 1: so rich because it's relating to us, but it's also 58 00:03:04,675 --> 00:03:07,476 Speaker 1: showing us what does the Bible say about this? 59 00:03:08,276 --> 00:03:09,676 Speaker 2: And so you write, just. 60 00:03:09,596 --> 00:03:12,636 Speaker 1: Like Adam and Eve, you and I intuitively reach for 61 00:03:12,675 --> 00:03:16,756 Speaker 1: fig leaves to cover the shame we feel in motherhood. 62 00:03:17,236 --> 00:03:18,636 Speaker 2: Which what should we reach forward? 63 00:03:18,675 --> 00:03:18,916 Speaker 3: Say? 64 00:03:19,395 --> 00:03:20,835 Speaker 1: And I kind of love this, Like when we make 65 00:03:20,876 --> 00:03:23,156 Speaker 1: a mistake, or when we lose our temper, or when 66 00:03:23,196 --> 00:03:25,796 Speaker 1: we forgot to peck the lunch or whatever, it's like. 67 00:03:25,916 --> 00:03:27,876 Speaker 2: We're reaching for the fig leave, like how can I 68 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:29,636 Speaker 2: cover this up? What excuse can I make? 69 00:03:29,636 --> 00:03:32,516 Speaker 1: Who can I shift the blame to whose fault is this, 70 00:03:32,516 --> 00:03:34,675 Speaker 1: because certainly it's not my fault, you know, and all 71 00:03:34,716 --> 00:03:38,916 Speaker 1: those things. So what what do you suggest instead of 72 00:03:39,956 --> 00:03:42,596 Speaker 1: reaching for the you know, to cover up that shame, 73 00:03:42,676 --> 00:03:43,996 Speaker 1: what could we do instead? 74 00:03:44,356 --> 00:03:49,076 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think this is something I'm really learning. Sorry, 75 00:03:49,116 --> 00:03:51,036 Speaker 4: you can hear my dog clicking around in the background. 76 00:03:51,036 --> 00:03:54,876 Speaker 4: She's so laid down. This is something I'm learning and 77 00:03:55,076 --> 00:03:58,276 Speaker 4: trying to buy God's grace, really discipline myself to do. 78 00:03:59,236 --> 00:04:04,396 Speaker 4: But if I am running anywhere except for to him, yeah, 79 00:04:03,556 --> 00:04:06,556 Speaker 4: I'm running the wrong place. Did you hear her? 80 00:04:06,716 --> 00:04:09,116 Speaker 3: Just like she's like I just like, I agree. 81 00:04:09,316 --> 00:04:14,116 Speaker 4: She's so mad down here something she's pounding, But I'm 82 00:04:14,356 --> 00:04:17,036 Speaker 4: really I mean, it's because it's funny that, like, I'm 83 00:04:17,156 --> 00:04:20,796 Speaker 4: so ready to be wrong. It's not a problem for 84 00:04:20,876 --> 00:04:24,156 Speaker 4: me to admit, yeah, I was wrong anymore. I think 85 00:04:24,196 --> 00:04:26,596 Speaker 4: it was. For a while, I was shocked to see 86 00:04:26,636 --> 00:04:29,036 Speaker 4: that I wasn't as greatest I thought i'd be. But 87 00:04:29,156 --> 00:04:31,636 Speaker 4: now I either am I'm like a pendulum for shame 88 00:04:31,716 --> 00:04:34,956 Speaker 4: to blame. It's either like I'm the worst and I 89 00:04:35,076 --> 00:04:37,075 Speaker 4: just sit in that guilt, or I swing really hard 90 00:04:37,116 --> 00:04:39,275 Speaker 4: the other way and I'm like they're the worst. They're 91 00:04:39,276 --> 00:04:42,195 Speaker 4: like exposing this, or my husband's the worst, he shouldn't 92 00:04:42,236 --> 00:04:45,436 Speaker 4: work as much or whatever, And it's not even a 93 00:04:45,516 --> 00:04:48,676 Speaker 4: settling in the middle. The Gospel's a totally different place 94 00:04:49,596 --> 00:04:54,116 Speaker 4: to run to say. This isn't surprising because I know 95 00:04:54,236 --> 00:04:58,716 Speaker 4: my condition I felt with Adam, and thank you you 96 00:04:58,836 --> 00:05:01,956 Speaker 4: provided a covering with that for this, so I don't 97 00:05:01,996 --> 00:05:06,596 Speaker 4: have to sit in this icky ceiling where like I 98 00:05:06,596 --> 00:05:08,596 Speaker 4: don't even want to exist in this moment because I 99 00:05:08,636 --> 00:05:13,436 Speaker 4: hate what I did, and he covers that that's I mean, 100 00:05:13,596 --> 00:05:18,116 Speaker 4: isn't the gospel amazing? Views? And then it's twofold because 101 00:05:18,315 --> 00:05:20,756 Speaker 4: he loves this too much to leave us where we are, 102 00:05:21,156 --> 00:05:23,676 Speaker 4: and so he doesn't just hold out absolution for what 103 00:05:23,755 --> 00:05:26,436 Speaker 4: we've done. He will hope for us to do different, 104 00:05:26,996 --> 00:05:30,595 Speaker 4: which is just amazing. But as long as we're reaching 105 00:05:30,636 --> 00:05:34,796 Speaker 4: for other things, like you know, I maybe I'm not 106 00:05:34,836 --> 00:05:36,556 Speaker 4: doing this thing well, but I'm doing this thing well, 107 00:05:36,716 --> 00:05:38,636 Speaker 4: or if my kids wouldn't do this, then I'd be 108 00:05:38,636 --> 00:05:40,395 Speaker 4: different if I as a was home, or if my 109 00:05:40,436 --> 00:05:43,476 Speaker 4: parents lived in town or whatever. Yeah, if we're reaching 110 00:05:43,516 --> 00:05:48,076 Speaker 4: for those things, we're missing the relief that comes from 111 00:05:48,116 --> 00:05:52,436 Speaker 4: the Gospel and the power for true and lasting change. 112 00:05:52,916 --> 00:05:55,476 Speaker 1: So if I could reach out to Jesus, if I 113 00:05:55,516 --> 00:05:57,916 Speaker 1: could put myself in his word, if I could sit 114 00:05:57,956 --> 00:06:00,036 Speaker 1: in his presence and figure out what am I supposed 115 00:06:00,036 --> 00:06:01,676 Speaker 1: to do? If I could lead into the Holy Spirit 116 00:06:01,716 --> 00:06:02,276 Speaker 1: and say. 117 00:06:02,236 --> 00:06:03,516 Speaker 2: Holy Spirit, what am I supposed to do? 118 00:06:03,596 --> 00:06:03,916 Speaker 4: Right now? 119 00:06:04,315 --> 00:06:07,796 Speaker 1: You don't like, then you're gonna start finding some answers. Yes, 120 00:06:08,116 --> 00:06:09,315 Speaker 1: you have three sons. 121 00:06:09,556 --> 00:06:10,556 Speaker 2: What are their ages? 122 00:06:10,596 --> 00:06:13,116 Speaker 3: Of the range of their ages? 123 00:06:13,356 --> 00:06:16,516 Speaker 4: Yes, it's one of the oldest is ten, which is disgusting. 124 00:06:16,796 --> 00:06:18,316 Speaker 4: I looked at him last night and I'm like. 125 00:06:19,116 --> 00:06:21,075 Speaker 2: So old, you are not allowed to grow. 126 00:06:21,916 --> 00:06:24,876 Speaker 4: He's so handsome and big. I like him so much. 127 00:06:25,036 --> 00:06:28,195 Speaker 4: He's awesome. And then we have a seven year old 128 00:06:28,236 --> 00:06:30,436 Speaker 4: who's about to turn eat and we eate like a month. 129 00:06:31,116 --> 00:06:34,436 Speaker 4: He also just is awesome, just a great kid. And 130 00:06:34,476 --> 00:06:37,395 Speaker 4: then we have a five year old who is also awesome. 131 00:06:38,636 --> 00:06:41,036 Speaker 3: We used to say to Yeah, we used. 132 00:06:40,956 --> 00:06:43,676 Speaker 4: To say about him, it's Jesus or Jail like he's 133 00:06:43,916 --> 00:06:47,876 Speaker 4: he's a little scary. He's insanely capable, super competent. I 134 00:06:47,916 --> 00:06:50,556 Speaker 4: caught him the other day. There was a kid racing 135 00:06:50,556 --> 00:06:52,996 Speaker 4: around our property on a two wheel bike, and our 136 00:06:53,036 --> 00:06:55,276 Speaker 4: youngest has training wheel. So I'm like, who is this kid? 137 00:06:55,596 --> 00:06:57,796 Speaker 3: It was him. He just I mean the. 138 00:06:57,796 --> 00:07:01,076 Speaker 4: Way I stood behind our first born son, like Mommy's here, 139 00:07:01,116 --> 00:07:03,876 Speaker 4: I've got you, and he just doesn't need us. 140 00:07:03,956 --> 00:07:06,676 Speaker 2: Right, He's just out there by himself. 141 00:07:06,195 --> 00:07:09,756 Speaker 4: To be yes. Jonathan Hyatt, He's like the poster child 142 00:07:09,796 --> 00:07:14,396 Speaker 4: for the right way to yes. Like let them have time. 143 00:07:14,516 --> 00:07:16,676 Speaker 4: He's a fair old. But we used to say Jesus 144 00:07:16,716 --> 00:07:18,676 Speaker 4: or jail, and now we say Jesus. Oor ocean's eleven 145 00:07:18,916 --> 00:07:22,476 Speaker 4: because he's so capable. Honey, he like waiting get caught. 146 00:07:22,516 --> 00:07:23,836 Speaker 4: So I'm just praying. 147 00:07:24,036 --> 00:07:27,396 Speaker 1: That's We're going for Jesus with you as much as 148 00:07:27,396 --> 00:07:29,276 Speaker 1: we like George Clooney, we're going for Jesus. 149 00:07:29,676 --> 00:07:31,556 Speaker 4: But we're just doing he'd be brad pat, I think. 150 00:07:31,596 --> 00:07:34,276 Speaker 4: But we're just doing it so differently for him than 151 00:07:34,316 --> 00:07:37,396 Speaker 4: the others, just because we're different people. Yeah, you know there, 152 00:07:37,476 --> 00:07:40,396 Speaker 4: my kids are not being raised by the same mom. 153 00:07:40,756 --> 00:07:42,076 Speaker 4: We just changed so much. 154 00:07:42,156 --> 00:07:44,596 Speaker 2: Oh, let's go there. So let's go back. 155 00:07:44,716 --> 00:07:47,436 Speaker 1: Like in your book you talk about here I am 156 00:07:47,756 --> 00:07:51,116 Speaker 1: and every mom could identify with this. Your five year 157 00:07:51,196 --> 00:07:53,756 Speaker 1: old is supposed to take a bath, but the splashing 158 00:07:53,796 --> 00:07:56,876 Speaker 1: water instead your two year old is running around instead 159 00:07:56,876 --> 00:07:59,476 Speaker 1: of you know, keeping the pull up on, and your 160 00:07:59,476 --> 00:08:02,516 Speaker 1: baby is not sleeping, and you're singing his mercy is more, 161 00:08:02,556 --> 00:08:05,595 Speaker 1: but you're not feeling like his mercy is more. How 162 00:08:05,636 --> 00:08:08,316 Speaker 1: do we understand those human limitations and what do we 163 00:08:08,356 --> 00:08:09,876 Speaker 1: do when we find ourselves there? 164 00:08:10,196 --> 00:08:13,676 Speaker 4: Yeah? That's a hard feeling, isn't it? And I felt 165 00:08:13,676 --> 00:08:16,916 Speaker 4: this most acutely. I think the transition from zero to 166 00:08:16,916 --> 00:08:21,356 Speaker 4: one and then the transition from two to three. I 167 00:08:21,396 --> 00:08:24,636 Speaker 4: think you're I only have two hands. I mean, there's 168 00:08:24,676 --> 00:08:27,076 Speaker 4: just so many moments early on after my third son 169 00:08:27,196 --> 00:08:29,596 Speaker 4: was born, and I was like, I cannot do all 170 00:08:29,636 --> 00:08:32,836 Speaker 4: the things. I can't be everything for them. My capacity 171 00:08:32,876 --> 00:08:34,716 Speaker 4: feels like it just plummeted. 172 00:08:35,556 --> 00:08:35,796 Speaker 3: You know. 173 00:08:37,756 --> 00:08:40,636 Speaker 4: I think one thing is my friend Julie always says, 174 00:08:40,996 --> 00:08:45,716 Speaker 4: we get it backward. We should we hate our weakness 175 00:08:45,996 --> 00:08:49,356 Speaker 4: and tolerate our sin, and we should hate our sin 176 00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:51,516 Speaker 4: and embrace our weakness. 177 00:08:52,436 --> 00:08:55,076 Speaker 3: And it's not so wise. 178 00:08:55,596 --> 00:08:58,916 Speaker 4: She said that to me in that season when I 179 00:08:59,076 --> 00:09:02,716 Speaker 4: was so mad that like, cooking dinner was so hard 180 00:09:02,756 --> 00:09:06,316 Speaker 4: for me, and I withdrew from public ministry for like 181 00:09:06,356 --> 00:09:08,756 Speaker 4: a year. I mean, I didn't post on Instagram for 182 00:09:08,756 --> 00:09:11,236 Speaker 4: a long time, I didn't have any projects because I 183 00:09:11,436 --> 00:09:15,716 Speaker 4: just could not. And in that season would say like, 184 00:09:15,836 --> 00:09:19,236 Speaker 4: I could feign capability, or I could be kind, And 185 00:09:19,596 --> 00:09:23,356 Speaker 4: so I learned to love kindness more than competence. I 186 00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:25,436 Speaker 4: can look like I have it altogether. I can do 187 00:09:25,476 --> 00:09:27,396 Speaker 4: all the things, I can show up all the places, 188 00:09:27,916 --> 00:09:31,876 Speaker 4: or I can be kind to my kids. And it's 189 00:09:31,956 --> 00:09:36,836 Speaker 4: interesting because, like the call to obey Jesus is supernatural, right, 190 00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:41,876 Speaker 4: but we fulfill those commands in natural bodies. So to 191 00:09:41,996 --> 00:09:47,476 Speaker 4: Julie's point, Adam and Eve were created with limitations before 192 00:09:47,556 --> 00:09:51,676 Speaker 4: the fall. So they still needed sleep, they needed God, 193 00:09:51,956 --> 00:09:57,036 Speaker 4: they needed one another, they needed nourishment before the fall. 194 00:09:58,036 --> 00:10:03,116 Speaker 4: And what I was doing was equating competence with righteousness. 195 00:10:03,796 --> 00:10:08,316 Speaker 4: And it's not a moral mandate to achieve a certain 196 00:10:08,356 --> 00:10:10,636 Speaker 4: amount of tasks in a day or have a big 197 00:10:10,676 --> 00:10:12,836 Speaker 4: to do list or whatever. Yeah, what is a moral 198 00:10:12,876 --> 00:10:14,716 Speaker 4: mandate is be kind to one another. 199 00:10:14,916 --> 00:10:17,636 Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, I love your neighbor. Yeah. 200 00:10:17,796 --> 00:10:19,756 Speaker 2: And your neighbors are little and they're around you all 201 00:10:19,796 --> 00:10:20,236 Speaker 2: the time. 202 00:10:20,556 --> 00:10:25,156 Speaker 4: Yes. And I was shaming myself for my limitations instead 203 00:10:25,156 --> 00:10:27,996 Speaker 4: of saying, okay, there a shift has happened here, yea, 204 00:10:28,516 --> 00:10:33,516 Speaker 4: And what it requires for me to be faithful is 205 00:10:33,556 --> 00:10:36,396 Speaker 4: to let go of all these other things that I've 206 00:10:36,476 --> 00:10:39,996 Speaker 4: soothed myself with. Really, they were fig leaves, volunteering at church, 207 00:10:40,156 --> 00:10:41,436 Speaker 4: serving on the worship ministry. 208 00:10:41,476 --> 00:10:45,276 Speaker 1: How the team so wonderful, I'm so needed. I brought 209 00:10:45,356 --> 00:10:47,916 Speaker 1: you the food and you needed it. So I'm the hero. 210 00:10:48,436 --> 00:10:51,236 Speaker 1: And all those things are good things, yes, But there 211 00:10:51,236 --> 00:10:53,196 Speaker 1: are seasons where it's like I cannot do that. 212 00:10:53,236 --> 00:10:55,076 Speaker 2: I just need to be home and be kind. 213 00:10:55,436 --> 00:10:58,636 Speaker 4: Yes, And it feels like I would have never known. 214 00:10:59,036 --> 00:11:00,996 Speaker 4: I would have never known the way I was running 215 00:11:00,996 --> 00:11:04,076 Speaker 4: to those things for my worth until I couldn't do them, 216 00:11:04,116 --> 00:11:06,436 Speaker 4: And so I felt like God was being cool to 217 00:11:06,476 --> 00:11:11,396 Speaker 4: me in that season. Yeah, I felt so diminished and benched. 218 00:11:12,116 --> 00:11:14,076 Speaker 4: And now I look back and I think that is 219 00:11:14,116 --> 00:11:17,236 Speaker 4: the kindest thing He could have ever done, to strip 220 00:11:17,276 --> 00:11:19,196 Speaker 4: away the things I placed my faith in that are 221 00:11:19,196 --> 00:11:22,276 Speaker 4: not Him. And that really is what has to happen 222 00:11:22,396 --> 00:11:26,436 Speaker 4: for biblical change to happen, for us to so see 223 00:11:26,476 --> 00:11:29,316 Speaker 4: our need. And it's twofold like sin praise on weakness, 224 00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:31,916 Speaker 4: and so that sea in that season where our capacity 225 00:11:31,996 --> 00:11:34,756 Speaker 4: is diminished, a lot of times we see our sins 226 00:11:34,836 --> 00:11:37,316 Speaker 4: so much more which is why it's hard. We start 227 00:11:37,356 --> 00:11:40,556 Speaker 4: to hate our weakness because it's what exposes our sin. 228 00:11:40,596 --> 00:11:42,156 Speaker 4: We do the same thing with people, right, Like we 229 00:11:42,236 --> 00:11:44,316 Speaker 4: talked about shame to blame, we hate our kids because 230 00:11:44,316 --> 00:11:47,476 Speaker 4: of what they expose in us, instead of just looking 231 00:11:47,516 --> 00:11:49,716 Speaker 4: at what's exposed, being ready to see it and taking 232 00:11:49,756 --> 00:11:51,116 Speaker 4: it to Jesus. 233 00:11:51,436 --> 00:11:52,116 Speaker 3: Yeah, but the. 234 00:11:51,996 --> 00:11:55,436 Speaker 4: More outrageous grace seems to us, like the farther we 235 00:11:55,516 --> 00:11:57,916 Speaker 4: sink down into the trampoline of seeing our sin, the 236 00:11:58,116 --> 00:12:02,116 Speaker 4: higher we will spring into joy with like those grace springs. 237 00:12:02,196 --> 00:12:05,036 Speaker 4: You know, I think believe you love me. I can't 238 00:12:05,036 --> 00:12:08,356 Speaker 4: believe that you forgive me. And that was that night 239 00:12:08,396 --> 00:12:10,156 Speaker 4: that you're referencing. The way I tell the story in 240 00:12:10,196 --> 00:12:12,796 Speaker 4: the book was a true turning point for me spiritually 241 00:12:12,956 --> 00:12:18,676 Speaker 4: of like, Okay, I'm no longer shocked, you know, and 242 00:12:18,716 --> 00:12:20,636 Speaker 4: I'm mighty to do what I need to do to 243 00:12:20,676 --> 00:12:25,156 Speaker 4: pursue righteousness, which is really about maintaining agency, like am 244 00:12:25,276 --> 00:12:26,236 Speaker 4: getting we keep. 245 00:12:26,076 --> 00:12:28,556 Speaker 1: You know, how we have this moment of illumination, right, 246 00:12:28,596 --> 00:12:31,316 Speaker 1: we have this moment of transformation that we understand and 247 00:12:31,356 --> 00:12:34,076 Speaker 1: the Holy Spirit's doing something. How do we keep living 248 00:12:34,116 --> 00:12:36,316 Speaker 1: in that so it's not just like, oh, that happened 249 00:12:36,316 --> 00:12:37,836 Speaker 1: to me five years ago, but now I'm. 250 00:12:37,756 --> 00:12:40,156 Speaker 2: Kind of back to my old self. How do we 251 00:12:40,276 --> 00:12:41,596 Speaker 2: keep living in that? 252 00:12:41,836 --> 00:12:43,876 Speaker 4: This is why I'll have you the promise of your 253 00:12:43,916 --> 00:12:47,196 Speaker 4: podcast and can hear it? Like Arlene is practical, she's 254 00:12:47,196 --> 00:12:48,036 Speaker 4: looking for the practice. 255 00:12:48,076 --> 00:12:48,596 Speaker 2: I want to know. 256 00:12:48,956 --> 00:12:52,196 Speaker 4: Yes, I think that's where community is so crucial. Yeah, 257 00:12:52,476 --> 00:12:55,676 Speaker 4: you know, I actually And it's not like we repent 258 00:12:55,716 --> 00:12:58,476 Speaker 4: of onuson and then we don't ever struggle with it anymore. 259 00:12:58,716 --> 00:13:00,956 Speaker 4: I will tell you candidly that like three months ago, 260 00:13:01,076 --> 00:13:03,316 Speaker 4: I stood in the kitchen of one of my dearest 261 00:13:03,356 --> 00:13:05,436 Speaker 4: friends and she had a big whiteboard out and she 262 00:13:05,476 --> 00:13:08,956 Speaker 4: had written down every single commitment that I had and 263 00:13:09,236 --> 00:13:12,276 Speaker 4: we were circling. We were like numbering them and circling them. 264 00:13:12,596 --> 00:13:15,436 Speaker 4: She said, not everything can be a glass ball. Some 265 00:13:15,516 --> 00:13:18,756 Speaker 4: of these need to bounce. And that's why I mentioned community, 266 00:13:18,916 --> 00:13:21,276 Speaker 4: because she was right there with me after my third 267 00:13:21,276 --> 00:13:23,836 Speaker 4: son was born, saying what can we quit? 268 00:13:24,116 --> 00:13:24,916 Speaker 2: What a friend? 269 00:13:25,236 --> 00:13:26,956 Speaker 4: Oh, she's the best and she's like one of the 270 00:13:26,996 --> 00:13:30,316 Speaker 4: most competent human beings in the world, so you know, 271 00:13:30,356 --> 00:13:32,196 Speaker 4: which is why she has the capacity to make a 272 00:13:32,196 --> 00:13:37,156 Speaker 4: white board of my life. But our the sins that 273 00:13:37,276 --> 00:13:40,716 Speaker 4: so easily ensnare us and snare us because we are 274 00:13:40,796 --> 00:13:43,556 Speaker 4: blind to them, and so we need people to hold 275 00:13:43,636 --> 00:13:46,036 Speaker 4: up a mirror or to say to us, hey, you're 276 00:13:46,036 --> 00:13:46,876 Speaker 4: doing it again. 277 00:13:47,396 --> 00:13:50,596 Speaker 1: Yeah, talk about that glass ball thing. I really like that, 278 00:13:50,636 --> 00:13:52,596 Speaker 1: And what balances and what does it balance? 279 00:13:52,876 --> 00:13:56,196 Speaker 4: Yeah, it's basically I think it's a matter of considering 280 00:13:56,396 --> 00:14:00,316 Speaker 4: calling and what faithfulness looks like. So the first thing 281 00:14:00,316 --> 00:14:02,316 Speaker 4: we kind of did was just go through and say like, okay, 282 00:14:02,316 --> 00:14:05,996 Speaker 4: what can only I do? Yeah, no, one else can 283 00:14:06,036 --> 00:14:08,516 Speaker 4: be my kid's mom. Yeah, you know what. One of 284 00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:10,276 Speaker 4: the main thing that things that came out of that 285 00:14:10,316 --> 00:14:13,516 Speaker 4: though that's a little I cannot believe that I made 286 00:14:13,516 --> 00:14:16,756 Speaker 4: this decision, but she put so we were numbering things one, 287 00:14:16,756 --> 00:14:19,396 Speaker 4: two or three, and she put a two by home schooling, 288 00:14:20,156 --> 00:14:23,036 Speaker 4: and I said, oh no, that's a one, And she said, no, 289 00:14:23,116 --> 00:14:25,716 Speaker 4: I'll be someone else can educate your kids could potentially 290 00:14:25,756 --> 00:14:29,436 Speaker 4: do that, And it had not occurred to me like 291 00:14:29,676 --> 00:14:32,356 Speaker 4: that was not a possibility. And so they are going 292 00:14:32,436 --> 00:14:36,436 Speaker 4: to a hybrid model next year. I enrolled them. Yeah, 293 00:14:36,476 --> 00:14:40,116 Speaker 4: And because it was there were other things like I 294 00:14:40,276 --> 00:14:42,916 Speaker 4: signed a two book deal and being faithful that contract 295 00:14:42,956 --> 00:14:44,476 Speaker 4: is a one. No one else can write this book, 296 00:14:45,636 --> 00:14:47,516 Speaker 4: so that will give me the time to do it. 297 00:14:47,556 --> 00:14:51,516 Speaker 4: So that's just like a practical thing of considering what's 298 00:14:51,676 --> 00:14:52,796 Speaker 4: right and there is. 299 00:14:52,716 --> 00:14:54,876 Speaker 3: No more date. It's so good. 300 00:14:54,676 --> 00:14:56,316 Speaker 4: Because that's a matter of Christian liberty. 301 00:14:56,716 --> 00:14:58,876 Speaker 1: We think only I can do that. We're like, oh no, 302 00:14:58,956 --> 00:15:00,956 Speaker 1: someone actually could someone e didn't do. 303 00:15:00,876 --> 00:15:03,236 Speaker 4: The places I was serving at church that she was like, 304 00:15:03,716 --> 00:15:06,636 Speaker 4: let's expand the Bible teaching team, you know, let's equip 305 00:15:06,676 --> 00:15:11,036 Speaker 4: other people to do this, And there were other things 306 00:15:11,076 --> 00:15:12,836 Speaker 4: where it's like maybe I need to have some uncompany 307 00:15:12,876 --> 00:15:13,276 Speaker 4: my house. 308 00:15:13,676 --> 00:15:18,196 Speaker 1: Yeah, right, yeah, And again the essentially. 309 00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:22,956 Speaker 4: Then to consider what does faithfulness look like right now 310 00:15:22,996 --> 00:15:26,596 Speaker 4: for me in this season, not with my previous brain, yes, 311 00:15:27,516 --> 00:15:30,756 Speaker 4: previous body, previous schedule, previous commitments, Like in this moment, 312 00:15:30,836 --> 00:15:33,276 Speaker 4: what changes need to be made so that when my kids, 313 00:15:33,436 --> 00:15:37,716 Speaker 4: how my kids experienced me as available and the work 314 00:15:37,716 --> 00:15:40,316 Speaker 4: that I'm doing for the Word is honoring him because 315 00:15:40,356 --> 00:15:42,996 Speaker 4: I think what a mistake moms make sometimes, I Arlene, 316 00:15:43,076 --> 00:15:45,716 Speaker 4: I think is like we consider what it looks like 317 00:15:45,796 --> 00:15:48,516 Speaker 4: to be faithful on a macro level. Yeah, like I'm 318 00:15:48,556 --> 00:15:51,116 Speaker 4: in homeschool my kids, Yeah, were I'm going to do this, 319 00:15:51,836 --> 00:15:54,036 Speaker 4: you know, put them in this program or whatever. But 320 00:15:54,276 --> 00:16:02,356 Speaker 4: then we are being completely faithless in the MicroStyle micro yeah. 321 00:16:00,796 --> 00:16:04,036 Speaker 1: And the micros where it's at like micros, that's what 322 00:16:04,076 --> 00:16:06,036 Speaker 1: the kids will remember, like oh you sat with me 323 00:16:06,316 --> 00:16:07,716 Speaker 1: after that and we had ice cream. 324 00:16:07,796 --> 00:16:09,636 Speaker 2: It's like, okay, that's what you remember. 325 00:16:09,956 --> 00:16:13,396 Speaker 4: Yeah, and think about the gospels like the micro is 326 00:16:13,436 --> 00:16:14,716 Speaker 4: what mattered to Jesus. 327 00:16:14,916 --> 00:16:17,316 Speaker 1: Yeah, your book is so beautiful. 328 00:16:17,396 --> 00:16:18,516 Speaker 3: I love how you have. 329 00:16:18,596 --> 00:16:22,356 Speaker 1: Part one is understanding the mom you are, so it's 330 00:16:22,476 --> 00:16:25,476 Speaker 1: it's like, look at yourself, understand where you are. And 331 00:16:25,516 --> 00:16:30,156 Speaker 1: I think people wouldn't listen to you. Wow, Abbous so white, 332 00:16:30,236 --> 00:16:32,396 Speaker 1: Like your voice is so calming, like did God just 333 00:16:32,636 --> 00:16:34,796 Speaker 1: birth you with his voice? Like people could just listen 334 00:16:34,836 --> 00:16:36,756 Speaker 1: to be like, oh, I'm so relaxed right now, I'm 335 00:16:36,756 --> 00:16:39,756 Speaker 1: just gonna listen to Abby talk to me. And people 336 00:16:39,796 --> 00:16:43,316 Speaker 1: would not recognize or believe, like, wait a minute, you 337 00:16:44,196 --> 00:16:46,676 Speaker 1: had problems after you had your baby. Wait a minute, 338 00:16:46,756 --> 00:16:50,836 Speaker 1: you were thinking about like these suicidal ideations, like how 339 00:16:50,916 --> 00:16:52,916 Speaker 1: is this even possible? Like I don't even understand that, 340 00:16:53,036 --> 00:16:57,876 Speaker 1: And that's going to give such grace and understanding to someone. 341 00:16:57,996 --> 00:17:04,995 Speaker 1: Right now, you were talking about how you just there's 342 00:17:05,076 --> 00:17:07,475 Speaker 1: bodily weakness in all of us and we have to 343 00:17:07,516 --> 00:17:08,236 Speaker 1: recognize that. 344 00:17:08,436 --> 00:17:09,356 Speaker 2: And so when you. 345 00:17:09,276 --> 00:17:12,196 Speaker 1: Would have these bad thoughts, you would say, oh, there 346 00:17:12,236 --> 00:17:15,356 Speaker 1: goes my brain again. This is just a blip. This 347 00:17:15,436 --> 00:17:17,916 Speaker 1: is not who I am. This is just my brain 348 00:17:18,236 --> 00:17:20,876 Speaker 1: doing what it does. After I have a baby, it 349 00:17:20,916 --> 00:17:24,076 Speaker 1: wasn't spiritual. And you started understanding what this meant about 350 00:17:24,076 --> 00:17:27,676 Speaker 1: your body, help us to grasp what was happening, because 351 00:17:27,676 --> 00:17:28,955 Speaker 1: I think that's just profound. 352 00:17:29,116 --> 00:17:30,876 Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm so glad you brought this up, because this 353 00:17:30,916 --> 00:17:33,796 Speaker 4: is something that hasn't come up a bunch as we're 354 00:17:33,796 --> 00:17:36,555 Speaker 4: talking about the book. But yeah, so there are ways 355 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:39,316 Speaker 4: we're limited before the fall, and then there are also 356 00:17:39,396 --> 00:17:42,275 Speaker 4: ways were affected by the fall. Like we live we 357 00:17:42,316 --> 00:17:45,955 Speaker 4: are housed in fallen bodies. So that means when we 358 00:17:46,035 --> 00:17:49,235 Speaker 4: fell with Adam, you know, so did the whole world. 359 00:17:49,475 --> 00:17:53,156 Speaker 4: So did our nervous system, so did our digestive system, 360 00:17:53,755 --> 00:17:58,276 Speaker 4: you know, like so did our brains. And so there's 361 00:17:58,316 --> 00:18:00,996 Speaker 4: not a part of us that is not affected by 362 00:18:01,035 --> 00:18:04,556 Speaker 4: the fall. It's why we get the throw ups, and 363 00:18:04,636 --> 00:18:06,475 Speaker 4: it's why I want to die every time I have 364 00:18:06,515 --> 00:18:10,515 Speaker 4: a baby. It's and I don't know why that happens, 365 00:18:11,436 --> 00:18:14,156 Speaker 4: I know how to apply the Gospel to it. Yeah, 366 00:18:14,235 --> 00:18:16,436 Speaker 4: you know, And the Gospel gave me the courage that 367 00:18:16,515 --> 00:18:19,515 Speaker 4: I needed to be honest on an evail form so 368 00:18:19,556 --> 00:18:20,356 Speaker 4: that I could get help. 369 00:18:20,796 --> 00:18:20,996 Speaker 3: Yeah. 370 00:18:21,436 --> 00:18:23,715 Speaker 4: And for some people that might be medicine. For some 371 00:18:23,755 --> 00:18:25,555 Speaker 4: people that might be therapy. For some people, it might 372 00:18:25,596 --> 00:18:28,036 Speaker 4: be joining a gym with childcare so you can get 373 00:18:28,035 --> 00:18:32,036 Speaker 4: those indoor fins. And I actually had blood work done 374 00:18:32,076 --> 00:18:36,516 Speaker 4: recently and I had previously had unbalanced hormones and because 375 00:18:36,556 --> 00:18:40,515 Speaker 4: of going to the gym, my hormones are now balanced, 376 00:18:40,755 --> 00:18:44,436 Speaker 4: which is bananas. That makes a difference in the agency 377 00:18:44,475 --> 00:18:47,196 Speaker 4: I have. Like if your body, if your body has 378 00:18:47,235 --> 00:18:51,796 Speaker 4: too much testosterone, is going to express itself as irritability. 379 00:18:51,955 --> 00:18:54,715 Speaker 4: Is it something to repent of? Yes? Is it something 380 00:18:54,755 --> 00:18:58,396 Speaker 4: to seek bodily care for? Yes. I think the mistake 381 00:18:58,515 --> 00:19:01,355 Speaker 4: we make in pursuing sanctification is that we fall in 382 00:19:01,396 --> 00:19:03,676 Speaker 4: one ditch or the other where it's like, oh, I'm 383 00:19:03,715 --> 00:19:06,116 Speaker 4: a sufferer, this isn't my fault, I'm not to blame, 384 00:19:06,836 --> 00:19:09,436 Speaker 4: or I'm just a sinner, and so we don't seek 385 00:19:09,436 --> 00:19:13,636 Speaker 4: care for our bodies. And sanctification is holistic. God cares 386 00:19:13,676 --> 00:19:19,676 Speaker 4: about both Jesus is redeeming all things, all things, and 387 00:19:19,755 --> 00:19:22,916 Speaker 4: so both matter. Yeah, you know, and we see him 388 00:19:22,955 --> 00:19:26,876 Speaker 4: caring for people's bodies all the time. That matters to him. 389 00:19:27,116 --> 00:19:29,876 Speaker 3: So yeah, I think I like that so much. 390 00:19:29,916 --> 00:19:33,156 Speaker 1: We had justin a whitmill earlier, early on earlier. That's 391 00:19:33,156 --> 00:19:36,436 Speaker 1: hard to say about the body and about how the 392 00:19:36,475 --> 00:19:39,596 Speaker 1: body is so spiritual and used in such a spiritual way. 393 00:19:39,636 --> 00:19:42,555 Speaker 1: So let's get to that hybrid classic, because I don't 394 00:19:42,596 --> 00:19:45,316 Speaker 1: see you do the hybrid classic, and I'm like, well, 395 00:19:45,396 --> 00:19:49,276 Speaker 1: this girl is hardcore. So first tell us what it is, 396 00:19:49,356 --> 00:19:52,596 Speaker 1: and then tell us just that role of exercise because 397 00:19:52,636 --> 00:19:54,676 Speaker 1: I have found that as well. Like my husband is 398 00:19:54,715 --> 00:19:57,356 Speaker 1: a realtor, and you know it'll be stressful. You don't 399 00:19:57,356 --> 00:19:59,475 Speaker 1: know like where's your next deal going to come from? 400 00:19:59,676 --> 00:20:01,595 Speaker 1: Or is this still going to fall apart? And he 401 00:20:01,676 --> 00:20:04,475 Speaker 1: will literally say like when I am working out, like 402 00:20:04,515 --> 00:20:06,995 Speaker 1: when and we do it like our living room is 403 00:20:07,076 --> 00:20:09,156 Speaker 1: like a gym exploded in it, right, you know, So 404 00:20:09,196 --> 00:20:12,275 Speaker 1: it's just like that. So so when he's doing that, 405 00:20:12,356 --> 00:20:14,636 Speaker 1: he's like, I feel no stress when I do that, 406 00:20:14,796 --> 00:20:19,755 Speaker 1: Like I feel so good. And so that physical training 407 00:20:19,876 --> 00:20:21,955 Speaker 1: it does have this value. So how have you found 408 00:20:21,995 --> 00:20:23,316 Speaker 1: that in your life. 409 00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:26,316 Speaker 4: Oh so much. Man. I well, first of all, this 410 00:20:26,356 --> 00:20:28,396 Speaker 4: is another thing like the Barnes and Noble video where 411 00:20:28,396 --> 00:20:33,475 Speaker 4: you can't see what's happening. But I actually cried for 412 00:20:33,596 --> 00:20:36,475 Speaker 4: the first forty minutes of that. It took us an 413 00:20:36,556 --> 00:20:41,076 Speaker 4: hour and fifteen minutes to complete, and I was having 414 00:20:41,116 --> 00:20:43,355 Speaker 4: some kind of emotional release. I don't know, And that 415 00:20:43,475 --> 00:20:47,316 Speaker 4: happens for me sometimes in exercise, where what I'm suppressing 416 00:20:47,436 --> 00:20:52,475 Speaker 4: in every day just kind of comes out when I 417 00:20:52,556 --> 00:20:56,235 Speaker 4: am working out, and it's particularly high stakes stuff like 418 00:20:56,235 --> 00:20:58,596 Speaker 4: when we're doing a competition, when it's a race, when 419 00:20:58,715 --> 00:21:01,156 Speaker 4: that's usually when it comes out, which I know who 420 00:21:01,196 --> 00:21:02,835 Speaker 4: that is. You don't need to know, you know. But 421 00:21:03,676 --> 00:21:06,515 Speaker 4: there was a turning point for me, and it felt 422 00:21:06,596 --> 00:21:09,716 Speaker 4: very spiritual because I was working out with a partner. 423 00:21:10,035 --> 00:21:13,755 Speaker 4: She's a believer, she's awesome, she has had such a 424 00:21:13,755 --> 00:21:18,035 Speaker 4: health journey. I'm so proud of her. But we were 425 00:21:18,076 --> 00:21:20,876 Speaker 4: running it together and they designed it so that we 426 00:21:20,876 --> 00:21:25,796 Speaker 4: had to run four laps in between every exercise, and 427 00:21:26,356 --> 00:21:28,755 Speaker 4: every time we ran a lap, we would pass the 428 00:21:28,836 --> 00:21:31,955 Speaker 4: winners thing where they gave you your medal and you 429 00:21:31,995 --> 00:21:34,595 Speaker 4: took a photo. And it was such a metaphor to 430 00:21:34,636 --> 00:21:38,436 Speaker 4: me of like keeping your eyes on the price and 431 00:21:38,515 --> 00:21:41,275 Speaker 4: continuing in faith, because the lie was like, we will 432 00:21:41,316 --> 00:21:45,116 Speaker 4: be doing this forever. I will die before this is 433 00:21:45,156 --> 00:21:47,196 Speaker 4: a work? Why did I sign up for this? And 434 00:21:47,235 --> 00:21:50,475 Speaker 4: then but every time we passed that metal station, it 435 00:21:50,556 --> 00:21:52,916 Speaker 4: was like, no, this will be over. 436 00:21:53,116 --> 00:21:54,515 Speaker 2: We're going to finish this and. 437 00:21:54,436 --> 00:21:57,955 Speaker 4: We will experience the glory of the finish, and so 438 00:21:57,995 --> 00:22:00,156 Speaker 4: we ran for the choice up before us, you know. 439 00:22:00,196 --> 00:22:02,475 Speaker 4: And that's one of the reasons I love fitness competitions 440 00:22:02,515 --> 00:22:05,916 Speaker 4: even though I hate them, is that it's such a 441 00:22:05,995 --> 00:22:09,596 Speaker 4: great metaphor. And Paul would agree, but I think. I mean, 442 00:22:09,796 --> 00:22:13,115 Speaker 4: I joined this gem that I was put on by 443 00:22:13,116 --> 00:22:14,876 Speaker 4: another gymnast competition, but I did it with a bunch 444 00:22:14,916 --> 00:22:17,555 Speaker 4: of girls from my gym. And I joined this gym 445 00:22:17,715 --> 00:22:21,316 Speaker 4: during the seon ob Sidal ideation. And I remember staring 446 00:22:21,356 --> 00:22:26,475 Speaker 4: at the exit sign during all of the workouts, and 447 00:22:26,515 --> 00:22:30,676 Speaker 4: I would cite scripture about endurance. That's how I started. 448 00:22:30,796 --> 00:22:33,396 Speaker 4: And then about a year in I realized I wasn't 449 00:22:33,436 --> 00:22:36,795 Speaker 4: looking at the exit sign anymore. And that's such a 450 00:22:36,836 --> 00:22:39,315 Speaker 4: metaphor for life too, like I just don't want to 451 00:22:39,356 --> 00:22:44,036 Speaker 4: be here. It was too much for me, and some 452 00:22:44,076 --> 00:22:48,355 Speaker 4: of it is like neuroplasticity, training your brain to stick 453 00:22:48,396 --> 00:22:51,796 Speaker 4: in there when something is really hard to do one 454 00:22:51,836 --> 00:22:55,515 Speaker 4: more rep, to do one more next thing by the 455 00:22:55,556 --> 00:22:58,196 Speaker 4: power of the Holy Spirit. And such a picture too. 456 00:22:58,235 --> 00:23:00,715 Speaker 4: I think of the need for community. The girl I 457 00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:03,396 Speaker 4: ran that race with yesterday text or she texted me 458 00:23:03,436 --> 00:23:06,636 Speaker 4: this week and said, we ran parking lot laps today? 459 00:23:06,636 --> 00:23:08,556 Speaker 4: Where were you? I needed you to help me not quit? 460 00:23:09,035 --> 00:23:12,916 Speaker 4: And it's so true. We need one another to say 461 00:23:13,116 --> 00:23:15,715 Speaker 4: you're stronger than you think you are. God is stronger 462 00:23:15,755 --> 00:23:18,916 Speaker 4: than you think he is, and his spirit is in you. 463 00:23:19,436 --> 00:23:21,916 Speaker 4: And it's not like popping people up to the point 464 00:23:21,916 --> 00:23:23,596 Speaker 4: where they don't need the word. It's saying you have 465 00:23:23,636 --> 00:23:26,275 Speaker 4: this because the power that raised you us from the 466 00:23:26,316 --> 00:23:29,636 Speaker 4: dead is in you. You have choices. Yeah, sin is 467 00:23:29,636 --> 00:23:32,555 Speaker 4: not the only choice you have because Jesus defeated it 468 00:23:32,636 --> 00:23:34,275 Speaker 4: when he rose from the dead and then gave you 469 00:23:34,316 --> 00:23:38,995 Speaker 4: a spirit to fight. So I think it's I cannot 470 00:23:39,116 --> 00:23:44,756 Speaker 4: express the value that fitness and group fitness in particular 471 00:23:45,116 --> 00:23:48,396 Speaker 4: have brought to my life. He's so grateful to God 472 00:23:48,475 --> 00:23:49,235 Speaker 4: for that provision. 473 00:23:49,316 --> 00:23:51,756 Speaker 1: Yeah, and it can be something little if you're listening 474 00:23:51,876 --> 00:23:54,676 Speaker 1: I've been going to the same neighborhood spin class for 475 00:23:54,715 --> 00:23:55,715 Speaker 1: twenty one years. 476 00:23:55,876 --> 00:23:58,156 Speaker 2: Oh, I love a neighborhood thing. I love it and 477 00:23:58,196 --> 00:23:59,636 Speaker 2: it's been absolutely great. 478 00:23:59,955 --> 00:24:01,876 Speaker 1: Yeah, I have a Mom's in prayer group in my 479 00:24:01,955 --> 00:24:04,715 Speaker 1: home and isn't it so sweet? Today the attribute of 480 00:24:04,755 --> 00:24:11,036 Speaker 1: God was God as finisher, that he finishes what he's right. 481 00:24:11,116 --> 00:24:12,916 Speaker 3: That is just beautiful what you just said. 482 00:24:12,995 --> 00:24:14,955 Speaker 4: And also I would like to come to your Mom's 483 00:24:14,955 --> 00:24:15,515 Speaker 4: in prayer group. 484 00:24:15,596 --> 00:24:16,595 Speaker 3: We would love to have you. 485 00:24:16,755 --> 00:24:20,035 Speaker 1: Yes, So going to part two, we just have a 486 00:24:20,035 --> 00:24:22,475 Speaker 1: little bit. We could talk forever. But part two is 487 00:24:22,515 --> 00:24:25,196 Speaker 1: becoming the mom you want to be. So you're assessing, Lord, 488 00:24:25,715 --> 00:24:27,276 Speaker 1: you know, tell it, show me about myself. 489 00:24:27,475 --> 00:24:27,996 Speaker 2: I will say. 490 00:24:28,035 --> 00:24:31,556 Speaker 1: My husband has this thing where he will just be quiet, 491 00:24:31,995 --> 00:24:34,156 Speaker 1: like even just like for a minute or two minutes, 492 00:24:34,836 --> 00:24:37,556 Speaker 1: and just ask the Holy Spirit, like is there something 493 00:24:37,556 --> 00:24:38,315 Speaker 1: you want to tell me? 494 00:24:38,796 --> 00:24:42,116 Speaker 2: Like in the quiet, like your body your mind. 495 00:24:41,916 --> 00:24:45,315 Speaker 1: Will tell you what you've been suppressing the whole day, right, 496 00:24:45,556 --> 00:24:47,995 Speaker 1: So just in that quiet, you'll he'll get like the 497 00:24:48,156 --> 00:24:50,555 Speaker 1: insight like oh, like one time it was so sweet 498 00:24:50,556 --> 00:24:53,235 Speaker 1: he said he got this insult like, oh, your wife 499 00:24:53,316 --> 00:24:55,635 Speaker 1: just like finished a book like shouldn't you take her 500 00:24:55,636 --> 00:24:56,515 Speaker 1: to dinner or something. 501 00:24:57,356 --> 00:24:59,555 Speaker 2: I was like, I'm glad why you have been in 502 00:24:59,596 --> 00:25:05,555 Speaker 2: there to realize that? Yeah, totally. So here we are. 503 00:25:05,676 --> 00:25:07,636 Speaker 1: We're wanting to become the mom we want to be. 504 00:25:07,715 --> 00:25:12,035 Speaker 1: We're desperate for change. Your book has that in that subtitle. 505 00:25:12,556 --> 00:25:13,276 Speaker 2: What about there? 506 00:25:13,515 --> 00:25:14,876 Speaker 1: You know, I kind of feel like it's the mom 507 00:25:15,116 --> 00:25:17,235 Speaker 1: is like I want to change everything. That's kind of 508 00:25:17,275 --> 00:25:19,156 Speaker 1: like nothing because you can't pinpoint what. 509 00:25:19,235 --> 00:25:20,116 Speaker 2: Is this everything? 510 00:25:20,475 --> 00:25:20,676 Speaker 1: Right? 511 00:25:20,755 --> 00:25:23,396 Speaker 2: So how do you start with? What do I change? 512 00:25:23,436 --> 00:25:24,916 Speaker 2: And how do I change? 513 00:25:24,995 --> 00:25:25,235 Speaker 3: Yeah? 514 00:25:25,275 --> 00:25:27,955 Speaker 4: I think you're so right. Specificity is so key. I 515 00:25:27,995 --> 00:25:29,595 Speaker 4: think one of the points one of the headings in 516 00:25:29,596 --> 00:25:31,275 Speaker 4: that chapter actually is be specific. 517 00:25:31,515 --> 00:25:33,755 Speaker 3: Yes, but yes two things. 518 00:25:33,836 --> 00:25:36,236 Speaker 4: One, I think we need to pick things that are 519 00:25:36,556 --> 00:25:43,515 Speaker 4: actually sin, not matters of Christian liberty, you know. So ultimately, 520 00:25:43,556 --> 00:25:48,596 Speaker 4: got whiteboard situation is about me saying, oh my goodness, Jesus, 521 00:25:49,436 --> 00:25:52,436 Speaker 4: I am saying I'm stressed out for you, and I'm 522 00:25:52,515 --> 00:25:55,275 Speaker 4: running to all these things for my worth. This is 523 00:25:55,316 --> 00:25:58,636 Speaker 4: not for your sake, because if I was being obedient 524 00:25:58,676 --> 00:26:02,035 Speaker 4: to you, I would not be stressed out like us. 525 00:26:02,156 --> 00:26:04,156 Speaker 4: You know, And there are times where we have to 526 00:26:04,235 --> 00:26:07,156 Speaker 4: push past our limits whatever, but not as a lifestyle. 527 00:26:06,995 --> 00:26:10,035 Speaker 2: Yes, like seasons of hustle, but not a lifestyle. But 528 00:26:10,196 --> 00:26:11,956 Speaker 2: your whole life does not have to be hustle. 529 00:26:12,356 --> 00:26:12,676 Speaker 3: Yes. 530 00:26:12,876 --> 00:26:15,355 Speaker 4: And it was an identity thing for me. But I 531 00:26:15,356 --> 00:26:22,035 Speaker 4: think the Psalmist in Psalm nine, David turns from like 532 00:26:22,116 --> 00:26:24,876 Speaker 4: praising God for his intimate knowledge of him to inviting 533 00:26:24,916 --> 00:26:28,396 Speaker 4: God's searching of him to say, Okay, search me, show 534 00:26:28,515 --> 00:26:31,556 Speaker 4: me if there's any way in me that's not of you. 535 00:26:31,876 --> 00:26:32,436 Speaker 3: Yeah. 536 00:26:32,475 --> 00:26:34,755 Speaker 4: And I think that's the key shift too, right is 537 00:26:34,796 --> 00:26:38,436 Speaker 4: I think a lot of women might pick up this 538 00:26:38,556 --> 00:26:43,436 Speaker 4: book because they worry about the impact of their sin 539 00:26:43,475 --> 00:26:47,755 Speaker 4: and shortcomings on their children. But in order for us 540 00:26:47,755 --> 00:26:52,156 Speaker 4: to really change, the motivation has to be the glory 541 00:26:52,196 --> 00:26:55,436 Speaker 4: of God and living with the glory he designed us for, 542 00:26:55,715 --> 00:26:59,075 Speaker 4: which is receiving it from him, you know. And so 543 00:26:59,515 --> 00:27:03,595 Speaker 4: we really need this shift to say against you and 544 00:27:03,636 --> 00:27:06,876 Speaker 4: you only have I sent Psm fifty one so to 545 00:27:07,436 --> 00:27:11,676 Speaker 4: And it's wonderful to be aware of how your sin 546 00:27:11,755 --> 00:27:14,676 Speaker 4: impacts other people. That's wonderful, very important, and we need 547 00:27:14,715 --> 00:27:18,436 Speaker 4: to hear with our kids. It's essential that we first 548 00:27:18,556 --> 00:27:21,035 Speaker 4: understand stand it and hate it because it's sin, not 549 00:27:21,116 --> 00:27:23,995 Speaker 4: because of what it The consequences of it. Yes, you know, 550 00:27:24,556 --> 00:27:26,275 Speaker 4: so I think that's and that's the work of the 551 00:27:26,316 --> 00:27:29,755 Speaker 4: spirit only he can do, changing our reference point from 552 00:27:29,755 --> 00:27:33,876 Speaker 4: self or from kids to be God. And then I 553 00:27:33,916 --> 00:27:36,875 Speaker 4: think the other pieces asking for that searcheam. I did 554 00:27:36,955 --> 00:27:39,316 Speaker 4: this yesterday and every time I do it. I don't 555 00:27:39,356 --> 00:27:41,436 Speaker 4: know why. I'm surprised that he is so faithful to 556 00:27:41,475 --> 00:27:45,275 Speaker 4: show me a way that I and but he brought 557 00:27:45,316 --> 00:27:48,515 Speaker 4: something to mind, a way that I am sitting against 558 00:27:48,515 --> 00:27:50,315 Speaker 4: my kids that I would not even have been on 559 00:27:50,356 --> 00:27:53,995 Speaker 4: my radar. And you're so easy to see, you know 560 00:27:54,396 --> 00:27:59,076 Speaker 4: that this like negative way of being I you know, again, 561 00:27:59,116 --> 00:28:01,115 Speaker 4: it's for me to know. But yeah, I had to 562 00:28:01,116 --> 00:28:03,516 Speaker 4: repent of it, and now I'm aware of it. I've 563 00:28:03,556 --> 00:28:05,715 Speaker 4: looked at it with specificity, and I'm on the watch 564 00:28:05,755 --> 00:28:08,876 Speaker 4: for it. I've let someone know and they're also on 565 00:28:08,916 --> 00:28:11,876 Speaker 4: the watch for it, you know. Yeah. But then I 566 00:28:11,876 --> 00:28:14,636 Speaker 4: think too, we can start to see, like, what will 567 00:28:14,636 --> 00:28:16,555 Speaker 4: benefit your kids is not just for you to stop 568 00:28:16,636 --> 00:28:19,676 Speaker 4: yelling at them. Well, will benefit your kids is to 569 00:28:19,676 --> 00:28:22,876 Speaker 4: have a godly mom, a mom who hungers and thirsts 570 00:28:23,076 --> 00:28:25,876 Speaker 4: or righteousness, whether it's away from them or with them. 571 00:28:26,396 --> 00:28:30,356 Speaker 4: You know. Yeah, So I think like looking with specificity, 572 00:28:30,755 --> 00:28:35,836 Speaker 4: asking for God's help to reveal. And yeah, I think 573 00:28:36,676 --> 00:28:38,796 Speaker 4: letting people know what it is that you're working on 574 00:28:39,316 --> 00:28:42,876 Speaker 4: or you're inviting that to change is really important and crucial. 575 00:28:43,116 --> 00:28:44,676 Speaker 4: And you know what's great too what I mean, then 576 00:28:44,716 --> 00:28:48,676 Speaker 4: they can celebrate with you. Yeah, Like I really see how. 577 00:28:49,316 --> 00:28:52,756 Speaker 4: I have a friend who had some childhood trauma and 578 00:28:53,316 --> 00:28:57,196 Speaker 4: really struggles to connect with her kids. Her nervous system 579 00:28:57,236 --> 00:29:00,916 Speaker 4: wants to keep them at arm's length. She lost a sibling, 580 00:29:01,276 --> 00:29:07,516 Speaker 4: and so she fights so hard for intimacy with her children, 581 00:29:08,116 --> 00:29:12,315 Speaker 4: for secure attachment for them. And it's such a joy 582 00:29:12,356 --> 00:29:14,756 Speaker 4: to be able to say to her, Hey, I saw 583 00:29:14,836 --> 00:29:16,596 Speaker 4: you took her to lunch this week at one on 584 00:29:16,676 --> 00:29:19,236 Speaker 4: one time. I know how you're fighting and I got 585 00:29:19,276 --> 00:29:21,916 Speaker 4: I work in here. Yes, she needs that, And how 586 00:29:21,916 --> 00:29:24,595 Speaker 4: would I know to encourage her if she had not 587 00:29:24,676 --> 00:29:29,236 Speaker 4: shared that strouble. Yeah, so that matters. This celebration piece 588 00:29:29,316 --> 00:29:29,956 Speaker 4: is really a key. 589 00:29:30,916 --> 00:29:32,676 Speaker 1: I have to smile because as you're talking, you can 590 00:29:32,716 --> 00:29:37,196 Speaker 1: hear your birds are singing, and it's. 591 00:29:37,036 --> 00:29:38,156 Speaker 3: Like, so sweet. 592 00:29:38,396 --> 00:29:39,556 Speaker 4: I love birds. 593 00:29:39,956 --> 00:29:40,876 Speaker 3: It's just so sweet. 594 00:29:40,876 --> 00:29:43,635 Speaker 1: And you know, what you're saying is so true and 595 00:29:43,676 --> 00:29:45,516 Speaker 1: so needed, And we live in a culture where we 596 00:29:45,556 --> 00:29:46,596 Speaker 1: don't even talk about sin. 597 00:29:46,996 --> 00:29:49,276 Speaker 2: It's like, that's not sin, that's just like the way 598 00:29:49,276 --> 00:29:49,956 Speaker 2: you want to do it. 599 00:29:50,036 --> 00:29:52,036 Speaker 1: You know. It's like as if we don't sin, because 600 00:29:52,396 --> 00:29:55,436 Speaker 1: if we sin, then oh this is this terrible judgmental God. 601 00:29:56,036 --> 00:29:59,196 Speaker 1: And it's totally like the opposite that we do have sin. 602 00:29:59,396 --> 00:30:03,156 Speaker 1: And when we come to hate our sin and say, God, 603 00:30:03,316 --> 00:30:05,156 Speaker 1: help me get rid of this sin, now we're going 604 00:30:05,196 --> 00:30:08,436 Speaker 1: to experience like the love and mercy and freedom that 605 00:30:08,516 --> 00:30:11,476 Speaker 1: God has for us. So I love how you are 606 00:30:11,596 --> 00:30:16,076 Speaker 1: encouraging us, empowering us, showing us like, yes, call it sin, 607 00:30:16,396 --> 00:30:20,115 Speaker 1: deal with your sins and come clean. And you know, 608 00:30:20,476 --> 00:30:25,236 Speaker 1: Isaiah gives that invitation that all that red stuff, it's 609 00:30:25,356 --> 00:30:26,316 Speaker 1: as red as crimson. 610 00:30:26,436 --> 00:30:29,276 Speaker 2: It's gonna be as white as snowy. So God is 611 00:30:29,316 --> 00:30:31,596 Speaker 2: a forgiving god, and you write that in the book. 612 00:30:31,836 --> 00:30:35,916 Speaker 1: He declares you a forgiven mom, a loved mom, a 613 00:30:35,956 --> 00:30:40,396 Speaker 1: fully accepted mom. And that's where we want to live. Okay, 614 00:30:40,676 --> 00:30:42,636 Speaker 1: this one thing I want to say, so you have 615 00:30:42,716 --> 00:30:44,716 Speaker 1: to get the book because there's a bunch of these, 616 00:30:45,196 --> 00:30:47,836 Speaker 1: but one. So, for instance, we're very as you've noticed, 617 00:30:47,836 --> 00:30:50,796 Speaker 1: I'm very practical. So we're talking about behavior. So the 618 00:30:50,796 --> 00:30:54,796 Speaker 1: behavior is ignoring my kids, not listening, treating them as inconvenience. 619 00:30:54,876 --> 00:30:56,395 Speaker 1: So we think, okay, let me just work on that, 620 00:30:56,516 --> 00:30:58,916 Speaker 1: let me just pay attention to them. But you're turning 621 00:30:58,996 --> 00:31:02,756 Speaker 1: us towards Okay, what's the root desire there? Why are 622 00:31:02,796 --> 00:31:05,876 Speaker 1: you ignoring your kids and not listening and treating them 623 00:31:05,956 --> 00:31:09,516 Speaker 1: like they're inconvenient? And you write, the root desire is 624 00:31:10,676 --> 00:31:14,836 Speaker 1: the love of productivity. Right, and this is just one 625 00:31:15,036 --> 00:31:17,355 Speaker 1: of many. So you guys can get the book and 626 00:31:17,396 --> 00:31:19,996 Speaker 1: then read these different behaviors and then think to yourself 627 00:31:19,996 --> 00:31:24,196 Speaker 1: because I think that's so good, like, yes, the behavior 628 00:31:24,236 --> 00:31:28,036 Speaker 1: will change, but it's because the insides are changing. And 629 00:31:28,076 --> 00:31:30,516 Speaker 1: as your insides are changing, you know, then all of 630 00:31:30,556 --> 00:31:32,436 Speaker 1: a sudden you're like, oh, I'm so much more gentle 631 00:31:32,476 --> 00:31:35,595 Speaker 1: with my kids because God's spirit is working in me, 632 00:31:35,796 --> 00:31:38,476 Speaker 1: not me trying to just perform. 633 00:31:38,676 --> 00:31:41,835 Speaker 4: Yeah, and we're motivated by what we're loving, right, So yeah, 634 00:31:41,996 --> 00:31:44,875 Speaker 4: that's the thing is to confess what we love that 635 00:31:44,956 --> 00:31:47,355 Speaker 4: isn't God our neighbor, to be able to identify that, 636 00:31:47,436 --> 00:31:48,996 Speaker 4: And that's a muscle. The more we use at the 637 00:31:49,036 --> 00:31:53,116 Speaker 4: stronger it gets. Yeah, and God's spirit reveals it can 638 00:31:53,156 --> 00:31:55,716 Speaker 4: I say one thing because I'm thinking about this friend 639 00:31:55,716 --> 00:31:58,876 Speaker 4: of mine taking her daughter out that is that really 640 00:31:58,876 --> 00:32:01,396 Speaker 4: struggles to connect And I wanted to just come back 641 00:32:01,436 --> 00:32:05,716 Speaker 4: to Yeah, that all at once. As believers, we are 642 00:32:05,876 --> 00:32:09,796 Speaker 4: always sinners and suffers and saints all at once, all 643 00:32:09,796 --> 00:32:13,116 Speaker 4: three things. And I think we want to be able 644 00:32:13,116 --> 00:32:15,196 Speaker 4: to tease that out, you know, like, is it that 645 00:32:15,276 --> 00:32:18,636 Speaker 4: she loves safety and needs to confess that that she 646 00:32:19,236 --> 00:32:23,916 Speaker 4: isn't connecting with other kids? Or sometimes I think it's 647 00:32:23,996 --> 00:32:26,636 Speaker 4: just all tangled up, right, But there are also wounds 648 00:32:26,636 --> 00:32:29,356 Speaker 4: and gaps we have that need to be healed, And 649 00:32:29,436 --> 00:32:33,956 Speaker 4: so I think that's another thing to consider is if 650 00:32:34,036 --> 00:32:36,036 Speaker 4: you grew up in a home where someone was shouting 651 00:32:36,076 --> 00:32:39,716 Speaker 4: at you and hitting you, and then your kids run 652 00:32:39,716 --> 00:32:43,636 Speaker 4: at you screaming, You're going to feel some kind of 653 00:32:43,676 --> 00:32:47,396 Speaker 4: way about that, Yes, at a subconscious level. And so 654 00:32:48,236 --> 00:32:50,236 Speaker 4: if every time your kid runs to you screaming when 655 00:32:50,236 --> 00:32:52,476 Speaker 4: they fall down and your first reaction is to push 656 00:32:52,516 --> 00:32:58,595 Speaker 4: them away, that points to a need for healing. Yeah, 657 00:32:58,636 --> 00:33:02,396 Speaker 4: And maybe it points to the need to confess a 658 00:33:02,476 --> 00:33:07,316 Speaker 4: love of productivity or safety or whatever, like it could 659 00:33:07,316 --> 00:33:10,516 Speaker 4: be both things. But I think we also need to 660 00:33:10,556 --> 00:33:14,316 Speaker 4: experience God's compassion, and so for my friend, she needs 661 00:33:14,356 --> 00:33:16,996 Speaker 4: to bring the part of her that is so hurt 662 00:33:17,476 --> 00:33:20,676 Speaker 4: to Jesus and say I need this to be healed 663 00:33:21,036 --> 00:33:24,036 Speaker 4: by you instead of running somewhere else for safety. Yeah, 664 00:33:24,156 --> 00:33:27,196 Speaker 4: you know, and that matters for our nervous systems too. 665 00:33:28,276 --> 00:33:33,196 Speaker 4: There's mejor reactions. There's things that feel almost instinctive. They 666 00:33:33,196 --> 00:33:37,075 Speaker 4: can be processed in community, prayed through. But that element 667 00:33:37,116 --> 00:33:39,956 Speaker 4: of curiosity is really important, you know, the willingness to 668 00:33:39,996 --> 00:33:43,036 Speaker 4: say I don't think this reaction is the way I 669 00:33:43,156 --> 00:33:46,036 Speaker 4: want my kids to experience me. I want when my 670 00:33:46,116 --> 00:33:48,396 Speaker 4: kids run to me screaming because they need a band aid, 671 00:33:48,796 --> 00:33:51,876 Speaker 4: that I bend down, hug them and speak softly to you. 672 00:33:52,756 --> 00:33:52,956 Speaker 4: You know. 673 00:33:53,436 --> 00:33:56,316 Speaker 1: Yeah, so that might be love, that curiosity. That's helpful 674 00:33:56,316 --> 00:33:58,236 Speaker 1: to be like why do I act like that? Like 675 00:33:58,316 --> 00:33:59,996 Speaker 1: let me be a little curious about that? 676 00:34:00,236 --> 00:34:01,996 Speaker 5: And it can be but what I do instead, and 677 00:34:02,036 --> 00:34:03,876 Speaker 5: it can be sending in spring And we don't have 678 00:34:03,956 --> 00:34:06,116 Speaker 5: to be able to tease that out because God has 679 00:34:06,156 --> 00:34:08,955 Speaker 5: mercy enough, yeah, fir sin, and he has grace enough 680 00:34:08,996 --> 00:34:12,436 Speaker 5: for our suffering compassion whatever, it's interchangeable. 681 00:34:12,636 --> 00:34:15,996 Speaker 1: Yeah, as people are listening, Abby, they'll think, oh, wow, 682 00:34:16,396 --> 00:34:18,756 Speaker 1: how does Abby know the Bible like this? And then 683 00:34:18,796 --> 00:34:20,875 Speaker 1: how does she because she's got the kids? So give 684 00:34:21,036 --> 00:34:24,315 Speaker 1: us just your my last question for you. If you're 685 00:34:24,356 --> 00:34:26,556 Speaker 1: a mom or a dad, you're struggling to have your 686 00:34:26,556 --> 00:34:28,476 Speaker 1: time in the Bible because you have a million and 687 00:34:28,516 --> 00:34:29,276 Speaker 1: one things to do. 688 00:34:29,716 --> 00:34:30,636 Speaker 3: Where can you start? 689 00:34:31,036 --> 00:34:36,316 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think if you can tether it to food, 690 00:34:36,756 --> 00:34:38,756 Speaker 4: that's one of the best things you can do. Agree, 691 00:34:38,876 --> 00:34:41,676 Speaker 4: Jesus says, man does not live by bread alone. And 692 00:34:42,036 --> 00:34:44,716 Speaker 4: it's it's ironic because I think even as moms, we 693 00:34:44,796 --> 00:34:48,476 Speaker 4: fail to feed ourselves sometimes, and so it makes sense 694 00:34:48,916 --> 00:34:51,036 Speaker 4: that we would neglect God's work because we put our 695 00:34:51,116 --> 00:34:55,116 Speaker 4: needs last. Right. So, but I really think the reason 696 00:34:55,596 --> 00:34:58,716 Speaker 4: they say necessity is the mother of invention, and so 697 00:34:58,796 --> 00:35:00,996 Speaker 4: if we really believe we need the Bible, we'll get 698 00:35:01,156 --> 00:35:04,076 Speaker 4: very creative yes, with how in ticket? 699 00:35:04,196 --> 00:35:04,396 Speaker 3: Right? 700 00:35:05,396 --> 00:35:07,716 Speaker 4: So I think our expectations then change, like I don't 701 00:35:07,716 --> 00:35:09,396 Speaker 4: care how I'm going to get it. I'm going to 702 00:35:09,436 --> 00:35:09,756 Speaker 4: get it. 703 00:35:09,796 --> 00:35:10,556 Speaker 3: I'm going to do this. 704 00:35:10,796 --> 00:35:11,756 Speaker 4: Yes, I'm going to do this. 705 00:35:11,916 --> 00:35:12,516 Speaker 3: I like that. 706 00:35:12,916 --> 00:35:15,196 Speaker 1: Yeah, Like this is the necessity and let's get some 707 00:35:15,316 --> 00:35:16,476 Speaker 1: creativity going people. 708 00:35:16,676 --> 00:35:19,156 Speaker 4: Yes, and it can look really different, you know, like 709 00:35:19,356 --> 00:35:21,236 Speaker 4: today I'm not even going to tell you this smort 710 00:35:21,316 --> 00:35:23,436 Speaker 4: sport of food I eaten because of the way the 711 00:35:23,476 --> 00:35:25,836 Speaker 4: day has gone. You know, there are some days where 712 00:35:25,876 --> 00:35:29,476 Speaker 4: i'm meal prep and it's great, nice and tidy, and 713 00:35:29,516 --> 00:35:31,676 Speaker 4: I know exactly what the macros were, and there are 714 00:35:31,676 --> 00:35:33,956 Speaker 4: other days where it's like a handful of my kid's snack. 715 00:35:34,716 --> 00:35:37,716 Speaker 4: And I think scripture intake can be the same. The 716 00:35:37,756 --> 00:35:40,516 Speaker 4: important thing is that we eat, yes, the important thing 717 00:35:40,516 --> 00:35:42,556 Speaker 4: is that we're nourished. Yeah, And we want to read 718 00:35:42,596 --> 00:35:44,556 Speaker 4: it in context. Nobody likes their worst to be taken 719 00:35:44,556 --> 00:35:47,916 Speaker 4: out of context, including God, so we want to we 720 00:35:47,956 --> 00:35:50,036 Speaker 4: want to do that, but I think one of the 721 00:35:50,076 --> 00:35:51,556 Speaker 4: best ways to do it is to do it with 722 00:35:51,596 --> 00:35:55,596 Speaker 4: other people. To find if you have like a CBS 723 00:35:55,716 --> 00:35:59,436 Speaker 4: or a BSF or some model of group Bible study das, 724 00:35:59,556 --> 00:36:03,676 Speaker 4: tryodcare like a run, don't walk to that you're going 725 00:36:03,756 --> 00:36:05,236 Speaker 4: to get a break from your babies. They're going to 726 00:36:05,276 --> 00:36:07,676 Speaker 4: be loved out by other people, and you're gonna learn 727 00:36:07,756 --> 00:36:09,436 Speaker 4: so much about that book of the Bible. So every 728 00:36:09,516 --> 00:36:11,196 Speaker 4: time you study it for the rest of your life, 729 00:36:12,076 --> 00:36:15,356 Speaker 4: you're gonna know it better. And then I love to 730 00:36:15,436 --> 00:36:17,116 Speaker 4: use what I call it three to five method. This 731 00:36:17,156 --> 00:36:19,996 Speaker 4: is like, you know, the hand full of goldfish is 732 00:36:20,036 --> 00:36:22,556 Speaker 4: listening to scripture with your kids or doing their Bible 733 00:36:22,596 --> 00:36:23,316 Speaker 4: study with them. 734 00:36:23,396 --> 00:36:24,676 Speaker 3: Yeah, but this is like. 735 00:36:24,876 --> 00:36:27,836 Speaker 4: Grabbing a protein bar. So find a bout at a time. 736 00:36:27,876 --> 00:36:29,916 Speaker 4: You have three to five minutes. This can literally be 737 00:36:30,076 --> 00:36:32,516 Speaker 4: the time you spend on the toilet. If you want 738 00:36:32,516 --> 00:36:34,076 Speaker 4: to put your Bible on the back of your door, 739 00:36:34,276 --> 00:36:36,596 Speaker 4: totally God will meet you there. But if you can 740 00:36:36,636 --> 00:36:39,316 Speaker 4: find three to five minutes and read three to five verses, 741 00:36:39,356 --> 00:36:42,316 Speaker 4: not randomly, but just starting at first one of a book, 742 00:36:42,516 --> 00:36:46,156 Speaker 4: any book, read three to five verses a day. Observe 743 00:36:46,316 --> 00:36:50,956 Speaker 4: what does this say? Are there any words I don't know? Interpret? 744 00:36:51,156 --> 00:36:53,476 Speaker 4: What does it mean? What does it mean for the 745 00:36:53,476 --> 00:36:56,316 Speaker 4: original people? What does it mean you know in general? 746 00:36:56,516 --> 00:36:57,756 Speaker 4: What does it mean about God? What does it mean 747 00:36:57,796 --> 00:37:00,996 Speaker 4: about people? And then third apply what does this mean 748 00:37:01,036 --> 00:37:03,836 Speaker 4: for me today and my life? The next thing I'm 749 00:37:03,836 --> 00:37:05,756 Speaker 4: going to do, how does the truth have experienced in 750 00:37:05,796 --> 00:37:08,956 Speaker 4: these three to five verses impact my life? It literally 751 00:37:08,996 --> 00:37:11,996 Speaker 4: takes three to five minutes. Yeah, and you will be 752 00:37:12,156 --> 00:37:16,236 Speaker 4: shocked and how much you memorize how much meditating our 753 00:37:16,276 --> 00:37:19,356 Speaker 4: scripture and going really slowly makes a difference. But some 754 00:37:19,396 --> 00:37:21,236 Speaker 4: of the seasons I thought I did not have time 755 00:37:21,276 --> 00:37:23,396 Speaker 4: to read the Bible or some of the most fruitful 756 00:37:23,436 --> 00:37:26,636 Speaker 4: Bible study seasons of my life because I went so slow. 757 00:37:27,036 --> 00:37:27,916 Speaker 3: Oh wow, you know. 758 00:37:28,036 --> 00:37:29,316 Speaker 4: And the three to five month that is why I 759 00:37:29,396 --> 00:37:31,196 Speaker 4: used every time I had a baby, I would use 760 00:37:31,236 --> 00:37:34,596 Speaker 4: the first three to five minutes that I nursed, and 761 00:37:34,716 --> 00:37:37,556 Speaker 4: sometimes I would just use like the same three to 762 00:37:37,636 --> 00:37:40,276 Speaker 4: five verses or I would read fifteen verses in a 763 00:37:40,356 --> 00:37:41,036 Speaker 4: day or whatever. 764 00:37:41,436 --> 00:37:44,916 Speaker 3: Yeah, but that is kind of just beautiful. 765 00:37:45,356 --> 00:37:48,996 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's beautiful, all right, Abby, anyone listening, it's gonna 766 00:37:49,036 --> 00:37:50,236 Speaker 1: be like I did. 767 00:37:50,116 --> 00:37:53,916 Speaker 2: More Abby Wedgworth in my life. So how can people 768 00:37:53,956 --> 00:37:55,236 Speaker 2: find out more about you and. 769 00:37:55,156 --> 00:37:57,516 Speaker 3: Find your books about you? 770 00:37:57,556 --> 00:38:01,436 Speaker 4: I'm like, I love this podcasting. You can find me 771 00:38:01,476 --> 00:38:03,556 Speaker 4: on Instagram if you are hanging in there with social 772 00:38:03,596 --> 00:38:08,676 Speaker 4: media at Abby like wear non slip, ab By wedge 773 00:38:08,756 --> 00:38:10,916 Speaker 4: like a shoe worth, like how much does it worth? 774 00:38:11,836 --> 00:38:15,636 Speaker 4: Abby Wedgeworth on Instagram or Abby Wegworth dot com. And 775 00:38:15,716 --> 00:38:17,756 Speaker 4: I have a newsletter. If you're on my website, you 776 00:38:17,756 --> 00:38:21,476 Speaker 4: can find them subscribing. Maybe something will pop up, I think. 777 00:38:22,196 --> 00:38:25,516 Speaker 4: But that's my favorite writing that I do, is that newsletter. 778 00:38:25,556 --> 00:38:28,396 Speaker 4: It's a little safer to be honest. Yeah, in a 779 00:38:28,436 --> 00:38:32,716 Speaker 4: private inbox than the public interweb. So yes, I say 780 00:38:32,996 --> 00:38:34,956 Speaker 4: my best writing for that group. 781 00:38:35,516 --> 00:38:37,036 Speaker 3: So they're so beautiful. 782 00:38:37,276 --> 00:38:40,756 Speaker 1: The book has help I'm ruining my kids. A gospel 783 00:38:40,796 --> 00:38:43,036 Speaker 1: guide for the mom who's desperate for change. 784 00:38:43,196 --> 00:38:45,596 Speaker 2: Abby. So happy to have you as a new friend. 785 00:38:45,636 --> 00:38:46,996 Speaker 3: Thanks so much for coming on. 786 00:38:47,156 --> 00:38:49,596 Speaker 4: Same, Thank you for your hospitality. This was a delight. 787 00:38:51,356 --> 00:38:54,716 Speaker 1: I hope you've enjoyed today's conversation. I'd love to keep 788 00:38:54,716 --> 00:38:58,355 Speaker 1: in touch beyond this podcast. Click subscribe in the show 789 00:38:58,396 --> 00:39:00,996 Speaker 1: notes and I will give you my latest email to 790 00:39:01,076 --> 00:39:04,316 Speaker 1: keep up on what's happening with technology and kids. 791 00:39:04,836 --> 00:39:07,556 Speaker 2: And maybe you like reading or listening to books. 792 00:39:07,636 --> 00:39:08,796 Speaker 1: I have a lot of books. 793 00:39:08,876 --> 00:39:10,396 Speaker 2: You could start with The Big. 794 00:39:10,196 --> 00:39:15,996 Speaker 1: Three, Making Marriage Easier, Parents Rising, or Screen Kids. A 795 00:39:15,996 --> 00:39:18,156 Speaker 1: big thank you to the team at Life Audio for 796 00:39:18,236 --> 00:39:19,436 Speaker 1: their partnership with the. 797 00:39:19,396 --> 00:39:20,716 Speaker 3: Happy Homes podcast. 798 00:39:20,916 --> 00:39:24,196 Speaker 1: Check out liveaudio dot com for dozens of other faith 799 00:39:24,316 --> 00:39:29,156 Speaker 1: related podcasts about prayer, Bible study, and more. Remember you 800 00:39:29,236 --> 00:39:32,276 Speaker 1: don't have to come from a happy home to create one. 801 00:39:32,556 --> 00:39:34,716 Speaker 3: You two can have a happy homes