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Speaker 2: Well, welcome to our new podcast set up here. It's
Speaker 2: a little rough, there's gonna be a lot of figuring out,
Speaker 2: but welcome to lofty goals and lofty expectations.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, you took my joke from yesterday. Yeah,
Speaker 3: how are you just going to steal someone as a joke?
Speaker 2: So we're doing this.
Speaker 3: I've been sitting on that for a day.
Speaker 2: We're doing the podcast now here in the loft in
Speaker 2: our home, which I know so many of you watched
Speaker 2: Melissa and I build going back nearly four years ago now,
Speaker 2: I mean, I guess, yeah, four plus years ago. We
Speaker 2: worked on this house, got it built. In that time,
Speaker 2: we had a lot of people making suggestions for how
Speaker 2: it is that we can use this loft space, and
Speaker 2: to be honest with you, it really hasn't been used
Speaker 2: all that much whatsoever. So for us to now be
Speaker 2: up here because our old podcast studio has been ripped apart.
Speaker 2: We moved everything in here and we're in the loft.
Speaker 2: Well see how it goes.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we're overlooking the entire house. We can watch Amazon deliveries.
Speaker 3: Mike is actually sleeping in the room next to us,
Speaker 3: so if you hear a baby, just start crying. You know,
Speaker 3: this is so strange being in our home recording the podcast,
Speaker 3: So welcome inside.
Speaker 2: We're very nervous about this, if you can't tell, just
Speaker 2: it being in a new space. We're very uncomfortable. But
Speaker 2: check out this really cool center shot that we have
Speaker 2: set up. I think this is the best edition, new edition.
Speaker 2: We always had a center shop. But Daryl's now missing.
Speaker 2: No Daryl, no bigfoot light, and like I said, we're
Speaker 2: a little uneasy. This is all just very new.
Speaker 3: Sure sad about the curtains.
Speaker 2: And the curtains are gone. I know a lot of
Speaker 2: you're gonna be happy about that, but no, a new
Speaker 2: fresh start for us. You can have to boat like like,
Speaker 2: just give us a little space because there's a lot
Speaker 2: of figuring out with being in a new space. I
Speaker 2: already know we have some lighting issues obviously, where we're
Speaker 2: in front of these big windows. Yep, it is really
Speaker 2: really warm up here because we're getting the afternoon sunlight.
Speaker 3: So again, just incredibly warm up here.
Speaker 2: Bear with us, show us some grace and hopefully this
Speaker 2: works out. This is going to be temporary for us. Yeah,
Speaker 2: once we get the new space built out and.
Speaker 3: We're going to bring in some plants and some color
Speaker 3: and things like that. I mean, this is literally week one.
Speaker 3: We got up here and we went, wow, it's really
Speaker 3: brown up here. So we're going to try to bring
Speaker 3: in some color. This is temporary. We are building out
Speaker 3: a new podcast space, but for now this will house
Speaker 3: us in our house with our lofty dreams.
Speaker 2: And if we start sweating profusely again, it's really really.
Speaker 3: Warm one hundred and four up here.
Speaker 2: So we have this still little planet that Melissa set
Speaker 2: up at the back of the table to go along with.
Speaker 3: Her Yam yam, our only piece of decor.
Speaker 2: We also have this tiny plant right here because we
Speaker 2: have a grape that's set up as the air return
Speaker 2: for our HVAC system. Again, a lot of figuring out that.
Speaker 3: We have to do to make it it's not going
Speaker 3: to stay. I got some new plants coming. They'll be
Speaker 3: here on Wednesday, So next week plants guys.
Speaker 2: So it's been a couple of weeks since we've recorded
Speaker 2: a podcast. This is a new space and location for
Speaker 2: us and doing so and so because of that, let's
Speaker 2: see how we do.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm excited to be back.
Speaker 2: On today's episode of the podcast. We're gonna be discussing
Speaker 2: the friendship recession. Is this the term that you've heard before?
Speaker 3: I have never heard it. You brought it up today,
Speaker 3: and that's new to me.
Speaker 2: With hearing this brand new term. Do you think that
Speaker 2: maybe is something that applies to us.
Speaker 3: I mean, I feel like we're in kind of a
Speaker 3: friendship drought at this point, Like it's beyond depression friendship depression.
Speaker 2: Are you depressed about it?
Speaker 3: I'm not personally depressed about it, but I would say
Speaker 3: the length of time that it's gone on.
Speaker 2: Friendship drought.
Speaker 3: Drought.
Speaker 2: I like drought that sounds less sad. So we have
Speaker 2: a video that go along with that. We will be
Speaker 2: playing that for you guys and discussing because apparently this
Speaker 2: is a new thing that has really taken off and
Speaker 2: flourished with our generation in particular, ever since COVID struck.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, yeah, our generation and probably the generation
Speaker 3: after us, and I mean maybe even maybe even the boomers.
Speaker 3: I think a lot of people are just more prone
Speaker 3: to stay home and a little bit more comfortable with that.
Speaker 3: I mean, even like you were bringing up even church.
Speaker 3: You know, like how many people watch online church instead
Speaker 3: of attending church. And that wasn't an option before you
Speaker 3: had to get up and go to church, but now
Speaker 3: you don't.
Speaker 2: It's now you can watch it on We will be
Speaker 2: discussing all of that, but before we jump into today's conversation,
Speaker 2: Molsa has a Tiny Human book plug.
Speaker 3: We're going to plug right now. Okay, so you guys
Speaker 3: know I've been working on Tiny Human and so this
Speaker 3: is the actual size and hardcover of the book. We're
Speaker 3: going to have books in hand next week. And so
Speaker 3: this is what our little gift set looks like. It
Speaker 3: is Yam Yam. He has spaghetti sauce all over his
Speaker 3: neck because Michael loves him so much. He's completely taking
Speaker 3: an over them and he's filthy at this point. But
Speaker 3: this is what he's going to look like after a
Speaker 3: week of being loved at your house anyway, So this
Speaker 3: is Yamyam. This is the book. This is what the
Speaker 3: gift set looks like they are forty dollars and they
Speaker 3: make a perfect gift. I know it's crazy to think
Speaker 3: about Christmas.
Speaker 2: All righty it falls off the back of the table.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, she'll die. So Yam Yam is going
Speaker 3: to sell out. I just heard that half of them
Speaker 3: are already sold and we're not getting any more. So
Speaker 3: if you think you're going to want the whole set,
Speaker 3: please please please get your orders in because it's just
Speaker 3: it's going to be like Ludo, we're not going to
Speaker 3: get any more of them. Also, you can send a
Speaker 3: Yamam and the book to a mother who chooses life.
Speaker 3: These are going to be held in the mobile units
Speaker 3: for Save the Storks. And then as soon as they
Speaker 3: go around and they will park outside of places where
Speaker 3: women will go looking for options and maybe not having options,
Speaker 3: and so they give free pregnancy tests and they give
Speaker 3: free altersounds, and then as soon as a woman hears
Speaker 3: their baby's heartbeat or they see either baby for the
Speaker 3: first time, or they just get a positive pregnancy test,
Speaker 3: they will be gifted one of the donation yams. And
Speaker 3: but we name him Yam because that's what Patka calls him.
Speaker 3: I don't know why that became his name, but anyway,
Speaker 3: for forty dollars, you can save a life because it
Speaker 3: will be the first gift that they are ever given.
Speaker 3: So we think that would be really a special thing.
Speaker 3: And also we are now we were donating fifty percent
Speaker 3: of all royalties, and now in Eva and I have
Speaker 3: decided to donate one hundred percent of all royalties. So
Speaker 3: every single dollar that we make off this book is
Speaker 3: going to be donated towards making motherhood possible. We're going
Speaker 3: to be buying diapers and wipes and donating them to
Speaker 3: options clinics to give out to women that are struggling.
Speaker 2: Okay, there you go. What's the website.
Speaker 3: It is tiny humanbook dot com. So go to tiny
Speaker 3: human book dot com. He's an't going to ship till October. Again,
Speaker 3: get your orders in. They're going to sell out big things.
Speaker 2: So all the author that have gotten your orders in.
Speaker 2: And I'm going to point this out reluctantly. Do you
Speaker 2: feel the light that's like beaming across your face right now?
Speaker 3: I feel heat again? I feel so much heat.
Speaker 2: These are the challenges you might notice. We also have
Speaker 2: these massive snow cone I don't know what they're called
Speaker 2: but these mic cover things they.
Speaker 3: Look like giant ice cream costs was.
Speaker 2: A massive upgrade, I want to say, because we're dealing
Speaker 2: with sound issues grad I'm becoming very insecure. I put
Speaker 2: the podcast together, so I'm looking at like the lighting
Speaker 2: across your face right now, the fact that we're both roasting,
Speaker 2: and then the fact that the sound might be a
Speaker 2: little wishy washy.
Speaker 3: We're going to get this, get this scardaway.
Speaker 2: It takes time to really get everything dialed in, and
Speaker 2: it did in the last space. It's just a process
Speaker 2: you'll get here. It's a process of refinement. So again,
Speaker 2: please bear with us. We're going to do our best
Speaker 2: to make this the best show possible that we possibly can.
Speaker 3: We're making a lot of changes in our lives right now.
Speaker 3: I mean I have switched to a tea ball instead
Speaker 3: of a key bag. It's so that you don't put
Speaker 3: tea bags in because you know, like I'm on this
Speaker 3: health journey and I just found out that they so
Speaker 3: the paper in a tea bag doesn't break down into
Speaker 3: your tea. They spray the tea bag paper with plastic.
Speaker 3: So every time that you're using a tea bag, you're
Speaker 3: ingesting microplastics, and you know how I feel about microplastics.
Speaker 3: I got rid of all the plastics in our home,
Speaker 3: so now I'm using this and literally my camamel flowers
Speaker 3: are floating at the top. So if I have flowers
Speaker 3: all in my teeth through this podcast, you'll know why
Speaker 3: we've got.
Speaker 2: Light beams across your face.
Speaker 3: Get a bunch of stuff in my and your teeth,
Speaker 3: it's flowers.
Speaker 2: We're working progress, guys. Thank you for being here once
Speaker 2: again with the new the Old Soul podcast.
Speaker 3: I have to chew it.
Speaker 2: How are you feeling? We wanted to address just some
Speaker 2: of the criticisms with us moving this entire podcast here
Speaker 2: into our home and abandoning the tiny home location that
Speaker 2: we got. We got, uh, I mean somewhat expected, but
Speaker 2: we got a number of critical comments, which is okay,
Speaker 2: It's fine. People are allowed to feel however it is
Speaker 2: that they want to feel. Do you want to address
Speaker 2: some of the criticisms though, before we jump into the
Speaker 2: meat and potatoes of this Yeah.
Speaker 3: Well, okay, so we kind of knew it was coming,
Speaker 3: because anytime that you build something online and people feel
Speaker 3: any kind of attachment to it, understand or they feel
Speaker 3: like this was a perfectly good space, and then why
Speaker 3: would you just gut it, throw it out like it's
Speaker 3: nothing because you want something better.
Speaker 2: Like it was not it was okay, it was it
Speaker 2: was wrong.
Speaker 3: It was rough. It had vinyl flooring on the walls,
Speaker 3: and again like vinyls not that.
Speaker 2: It didn't have proper plumbing, which is why we couldn't combing.
Speaker 3: And it had a major It had black mold on
Speaker 3: the walls in the kid's room, on the surface on
Speaker 3: the surface of the walls, and we had a major
Speaker 3: rodent issue going on behind the walls, so those walls
Speaker 3: needed to be ripped out, and all of that insulation
Speaker 3: had become nesting material for mice. So when we took
Speaker 3: the OSB off, something that wasn't in the videos is
Speaker 3: we had two massive nests in the ceiling channels that
Speaker 3: fell onto our help just I mean sorry, like a
Speaker 3: million mouse poop pebbles went everywhere, I mean scattered across
Speaker 3: the floor after hitting somebody in the head, and then
Speaker 3: behind the walls like that, you could literally see a
Speaker 3: trail of where they had gone, and there is currently
Speaker 3: a dead mouse stuck jerkied in. Like I mean, we
Speaker 3: had a major rodent issue.
Speaker 2: One of those major But yeah, we had some rodent
Speaker 2: issues and we just really slapped that place together for
Speaker 2: as cheaply as we possibly could, which is why there
Speaker 2: was improper plumbing and some electrical issues that were a
Speaker 2: little shot fortunately.
Speaker 3: Held around where mice could get in. We've now learned
Speaker 3: so much from that belt.
Speaker 2: Fortunately everything held up really well in the two and
Speaker 2: a half years that we were living there. So could
Speaker 2: KINMANI have moved in there, Yeah, you could have, but
Speaker 2: it's less than ideal. Yeah, and so we're doing this properly.
Speaker 2: We're adding some space to it. And I think that
Speaker 2: was a big part of the criticism of like, hey,
Speaker 2: this was six inch and square feet that you know
Speaker 2: was enough for the six of you, the six of
Speaker 2: us when we first moved here. If just your son
Speaker 2: is moving in there, why is that you're expanding and
Speaker 2: making the space so much larger, right?
Speaker 3: And Okay, So one I didn't consider it to be
Speaker 3: a very healthy environment after we moved out. I think
Speaker 3: when we were living in it it was different because
Speaker 3: there was activity and stuff. I mean, we still had
Speaker 3: some mice then too, and I think a squirrel. But
Speaker 3: remember there was like the one bigger Okay. Anyway, so
Speaker 3: I didn't consider that to be a healthy error environment
Speaker 3: somewhere where I would want my children living with mold
Speaker 3: and rodents behind the wall, and like you literally had
Speaker 3: to pull the walls out in order to clean it
Speaker 3: properly and bleach it so that and then also, this
Speaker 3: is not a space for just Kaimani for now. This
Speaker 3: is not just a launching pad. We figured since we're
Speaker 3: doing it, we're putting plumbing in and we're ripping walls
Speaker 3: out and bleaching and doing all that, we may as
Speaker 3: well expand it and make it a more livable living
Speaker 3: space for the future.
Speaker 2: Correct. Yeah, I think that's where a lot of the
Speaker 2: misunderstanding came from. So we are building this so that
Speaker 2: Kamani has an option once he turns eighteen to gain
Speaker 2: a little more independence. But really what we're building this
Speaker 2: space for is just kind of a secondary, more suitable,
Speaker 2: more adequate home in case in case. You know, we're
Speaker 2: fully anticipating that one of the kids at some point
Speaker 2: is going to get married, possibly have kids, and if
Speaker 2: the economic climate still is then what it is now
Speaker 2: to where it's really difficult for a young person to
Speaker 2: go out and just purchase a home like we were
Speaker 2: fortunately able to at the age of twenty three. This
Speaker 2: gives them another fallback to where they can be married
Speaker 2: with one or two kids and live in this space
Speaker 2: very comfortably. And so from the onset when we first
Speaker 2: moved here, we told a lot of you guys that hey,
Speaker 2: this is our plan that ideally things would work out
Speaker 2: to where we had, you know, the necessary resources to
Speaker 2: make this dream of having family here on this plot
Speaker 2: of land just just nearby, safe accounted for, and it's
Speaker 2: it's something that it was our dream to be able
Speaker 2: to provide this option for our kids so that they
Speaker 2: could take chances and know that they had a safety
Speaker 2: that in place should things not work out favorably. So
Speaker 2: that's really the reason and our motivation for demolishing the
Speaker 2: existing tiny home, which has been very a very very
Speaker 2: difficult process. So just put it that way. I was
Speaker 2: getting like legitimately sad in the process of turning this
Speaker 2: space apart, and I think maybe that came across in
Speaker 2: the video, But we just wanted to address some of
Speaker 2: these questions and concerns and criticisms of so many you
Speaker 2: had out there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, I think that things have kind of changed,
Speaker 3: like it's not a new concept to build homes for
Speaker 3: your children. And so for us personally, our two oldest
Speaker 3: are not choosing to go to university, and so because
Speaker 3: they're not going to university, we will instead take the
Speaker 3: money that we would spend to send them to school
Speaker 3: and help them with their first houses because we don't
Speaker 3: want to see our children struggling and starting out in debt.
Speaker 3: If we can help them to get started and not
Speaker 3: have to take on these big mortgages that they can't
Speaker 3: afford and just start out their lives in crippling debt
Speaker 3: and stress and everything that comes with that. They can
Speaker 3: instead take the money that they would do for you know,
Speaker 3: apply to trying to buy a home and paying off
Speaker 3: high interest rates at a bank, and they can maybe
Speaker 3: start a business with that or do something else not
Speaker 3: have car payments. And so for us, it's just something
Speaker 3: that we can do for our children. And I don't
Speaker 3: view it as being any different than paying for school
Speaker 3: for your kids. You're helping your kids launch, yeah, And
Speaker 3: so I mean, I think a lot of the criticism is, no,
Speaker 3: you're actually keeping them at your place by providing housing
Speaker 3: for them. Case It's like, no, these are places that
Speaker 3: they can have They're free to live here, but they
Speaker 3: don't have to live here separately.
Speaker 2: Can I address just the comments of like it's excessive,
Speaker 2: like things are becoming excessive? Again, I understand the perception,
Speaker 2: but we put our all into what it is that
Speaker 2: we do, and we do everything for our family and
Speaker 2: specifically for our kids. And so, yeah, this did serve
Speaker 2: as an opportunity for us to pursue this really lifelong
Speaker 2: dream that Melissa and I have collectively had together of
Speaker 2: being able to just you know, get our kids started
Speaker 2: off on the right foot, I suppose, And so I
Speaker 2: understand the perception, but we've made a lot of shocrifices
Speaker 2: and worked very hard in order to enable ourselves to
Speaker 2: have this opportunity. And so that's been our lifelong pursuit.
Speaker 2: We've been very single minded in our focus, and so
Speaker 2: this is what we're doing. If folks don't like it,
Speaker 2: completely understand. Yeah, but we're excited for the future.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And like I said, it's not a new concept
Speaker 3: to provide for your children. Like there was generational housing
Speaker 3: for centuries, it's actually a new concept for families to
Speaker 3: just oh, you turn eighteen, you're on your own. Go
Speaker 3: And I mean families helped the younger generations. You're supposed
Speaker 3: to help the younger generations. You're supposed to leave a legacy.
Speaker 3: And I think the habit that Americans have gotten into
Speaker 3: in particular, because you don't see this a lot in
Speaker 3: European countries or in Asian countries, you see a lot
Speaker 3: more generational housing. You see it in Hawaii, probably from
Speaker 3: the Asian influence, and just you know.
Speaker 2: There's a necessity there for the same reasons. Housing costs
Speaker 2: are exorbitant there.
Speaker 3: Right, but they don't just throw people out, and like
Speaker 3: Grandma lives there, and mom lives there, and the grandkids
Speaker 3: live there, and there's something really beautiful about that. You
Speaker 3: do see it throughout Europe and in Asian cultures, and
Speaker 3: I think that's a really neat thing, and it's something
Speaker 3: that we've lost here in America because we are so
Speaker 3: fiercely independent in America that we think our children need
Speaker 3: to be fiercely independent when they turn eighteen, go out
Speaker 3: there and struggle and get and take on a lot
Speaker 3: of dead and then bring on all this credit card debt.
Speaker 3: And you can watch a twenty two year old or
Speaker 3: twenty five year old get married and just be drowning
Speaker 3: in debt, and then they feel like, well, we can't
Speaker 3: start families. We have all this debt, and so what
Speaker 3: is the point of having all of this wealth as family?
Speaker 3: Not that we have like wealth, but you know what
Speaker 3: I mean, Like everyone hoards their wealth or their retirement
Speaker 3: and then they leave it to their kids when they die.
Speaker 3: But at the same time, it's like, you can get
Speaker 3: it from my cold dead fingers. You know what are
Speaker 3: you sitting on all the money for? You can help
Speaker 3: your family now. You can help your kids now when
Speaker 3: their kids are little. Because let's say we live to
Speaker 3: the ripe old age of like you know, our eighties
Speaker 3: or nineties. I want to be one hundred and three,
Speaker 3: and then by the time I leave my children anything,
Speaker 3: their children are grown and gone and I haven't helped
Speaker 3: my grandchildren at all, and then they'll take that money
Speaker 3: and then they'll hold on to it until their kids
Speaker 3: kill us.
Speaker 2: The purpose of our life and the way that we
Speaker 2: do it is that we exist so that we can
Speaker 2: provide you know, opportunity.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I help them now. I want to help them
Speaker 3: while we're while we're younger, and we're we have a lot.
Speaker 2: Of family discussions about the fact that hey, we've been
Speaker 2: building and doing all this, but Melissa and I very
Speaker 2: likely won't be around to enjoy it like the kids
Speaker 2: and hopefully our grandkids will. We're building all this for
Speaker 2: not ourselves. We're building it for the generations to come.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I don't see the point of like hoarding
Speaker 3: anything from our children. The entire we live our lives
Speaker 3: for our kids. And so if we can get them started,
Speaker 3: and if I mean, Navea wants to stay here, so
Speaker 3: we're going to help her in every way that we can.
Speaker 3: She's going to be probably possibly she says yes, building
Speaker 3: her own house starting next year out here, starting in
Speaker 3: the spring, and so she's already in the planning phases
Speaker 3: for that. We are not paying to build her forever home.
Speaker 3: She's going to be doing that herself. So we're really
Speaker 3: proud of her. She's working very hard, saving her money.
Speaker 3: But I mean that build is her. We built a
Speaker 3: little apartment for her to live in while she builds.
Speaker 3: Same thing goes with Kaimani. If he chooses to build
Speaker 3: a bigger house, then he's going to be building that.
Speaker 2: I already told her I will help with some of
Speaker 2: the labor, but I'm not building you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we're not paying for it either.
Speaker 2: This is your thing since you brought it up reluctantly,
Speaker 2: and I asked, do you want to address some of
Speaker 2: the quote unquote wealth comments and remarks because I even
Speaker 2: got we got a comment that I ended up just
Speaker 2: getting rid of because I'm I. These are the ones
Speaker 2: that really gets me in comments don't generally gets me,
Speaker 2: but stuff like this does of like, Hey, you guys
Speaker 2: are being manipulative and trying to convince people that you
Speaker 2: are not rich and we are not rich people. People
Speaker 2: I drive a twelve year old vehicle, They.
Speaker 3: Think that we do that for show.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well I'm bringing up my truck specifically because this
Speaker 2: guy said, hey, like, you're just driving old vehicles and
Speaker 2: cars to pretend like you're not rich. No, I'm driving
Speaker 2: an old vehicle and car because it's paid off. No,
Speaker 2: because my both of our vehicles are paid off. And again,
Speaker 2: it enables us to save a lot of money to
Speaker 2: do the things that we just prioritize and mean a
Speaker 2: lot more to us, like like an additional living space
Speaker 2: for our kids. I would love to purchase a brand
Speaker 2: new truck.
Speaker 3: And maybe you will like that's what I say. I
Speaker 3: mean because he keeps showing me all these.
Speaker 2: Trucks, this truck I've been wanting to trug.
Speaker 3: And pointing them out in town.
Speaker 2: I'm like, this is a matter of manipulation. Like we work,
Speaker 2: We work very hard. We work seven days a week,
Speaker 2: and I don't feel.
Speaker 3: Guilty because we do Sabbath.
Speaker 2: Now yeah, yeah, okay, we'll say six. But it's seriously,
Speaker 2: I know everybody wants to be dismissive the fact of
Speaker 2: like YouTube isn't a lot of work. It's a lot
Speaker 2: of work. It really is especial when you're running too
Speaker 2: channels like we are, And so do we make a
Speaker 2: good living doing that? Absolutely? Do we work really really
Speaker 2: really hard for it. Absolutely. We're not these people that
Speaker 2: like have been blessed with being promoted on the platform
Speaker 2: at all. Like this has been a grind for us
Speaker 2: since day one. We've fought and clawed for any ounce
Speaker 2: of proceeved success that we might have had online. And
Speaker 2: I'm okay with that. I'm actually, you know, somewhat appreciative
Speaker 2: for it, quite honestly, because it serves as a motivating
Speaker 2: force for us and pluging away. But never has this
Speaker 2: ever boiled down to like trying to manipulate anybody through cameras.
Speaker 2: We work hard, we save our money, and we don't
Speaker 2: spend money on things like lavish vacations and we take
Speaker 2: a once a year family trip. We don't have things
Speaker 2: like new cars. This guy was like you about one
Speaker 2: hundred thousand dollars boat. We bought that boat. It was
Speaker 2: not one hundred thousand dollars. I bought it used. It's
Speaker 2: six years old, and I got a really good deal
Speaker 2: on it. And for me, again, it was at about
Speaker 2: the purchase of a boat. It was about having an
Speaker 2: opportunity to you. Really look that I get to you
Speaker 2: to create more memories, just this one in particular.
Speaker 3: And he made fun of mine minivan, and so I like, Patty,
Speaker 3: since you.
Speaker 2: Bought the whole world thing up, Like, we're not we're
Speaker 2: not wealthy people. Again, we work very hard, we make
Speaker 2: a good living, not trying to deny that, but we're
Speaker 2: not wealthy by any means. We still scrape and sacrifice,
Speaker 2: and we don't purchase new clothes, you know, and if
Speaker 2: we do, they're very shape tooths. We're just we're not
Speaker 2: those types of people. We are people that work hard
Speaker 2: for what is we want and what we want is
Speaker 2: to create kind of a family compound here in our property.
Speaker 2: That has always been the goal, and so for that reason,
Speaker 2: that's that's the way we operate the world. Yeah, we do.
Speaker 3: Like the builds and the continuing of building has nothing
Speaker 3: to do with YouTube. Like that's another like, oh, you're
Speaker 3: just doing this for your YouTube. You're just building this
Speaker 3: for YouTube. You're starting a new build for YouTube, and
Speaker 3: it actually has nothing to do with YouTube. A lot
Speaker 3: of the decisions we make have actually hurt us on
Speaker 3: the platform. One getting into politics podcasting podcastry, speaking freely
Speaker 3: for an hour where you're expressing your thoughts and opinions
Speaker 3: has hurt us tremendously. We have had so many people say,
Speaker 3: I literally can't stand you guys anymore, now that I
Speaker 3: know how you feel, you've brought, you've brought God into things,
Speaker 3: you've brought your politics into things. Can't stand you guys anymore.
Speaker 3: And so they're like, I literally cannot even enjoy your building.
Speaker 2: Falls in line with that, like, continuing to do what
Speaker 2: it is we've done for the last six plus years
Speaker 2: now it doesn't benefit us at all. We would do
Speaker 2: and perform much better if we were to pivot and
Speaker 2: take on a new adventure. But again, that's not what
Speaker 2: we're about. And if hopefully, in doing this podcast, you
Speaker 2: guys feel as though you've got to know us fairly well.
Speaker 2: We're not people who pursue like whatever it is that's
Speaker 2: popular online. We do what we do and if people
Speaker 2: enjoy it, fantastic, and if not, that's okay too. There
Speaker 2: are a lot of other channels out there and a
Speaker 2: lot of the other people who are willing to do that,
Speaker 2: and that's not a knock on those people. I'm not
Speaker 2: trying to criticize anybody else. You're free to do whatever
Speaker 2: it is.
Speaker 3: Yeah, the platform it's for, it's a creative outlet.
Speaker 2: So we are not those people, don't We don't like
Speaker 2: wildly chase views online. We do what we do and
Speaker 2: we hope that people enjoy it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, So our ultimate goal is just to live debt
Speaker 3: free and then hopefully help our children to live debt free. Also.
Speaker 3: I think there's just a lot of peace and freedom
Speaker 3: in that. And so part of our homeschool curriculum, because
Speaker 3: we homeschool our kids always have is just teaching them
Speaker 3: how to start businesses, how to work for themselves, how
Speaker 3: to try different things and how to chase their passions
Speaker 3: and their hobbies. I mean, if one of our kids
Speaker 3: has a hobby or a passion, like we go all
Speaker 3: in like well, I mean, Eli and as many hobbies
Speaker 3: you and your many hobbies.
Speaker 2: We're going to get into that. I don't want to
Speaker 2: be a dead horse with this whole thing here. But
Speaker 2: being in this new space and some of the critiques
Speaker 2: and criticisms that we got in the comments, we don't
Speaker 2: and bothered. I'm feeling legitimately hot. It's like my mustache
Speaker 2: is sweating, and hopefully that answers some of your questions.
Speaker 3: My mustache is sweating too.
Speaker 2: And if you have any fair questions that you'd like
Speaker 2: for us to elaborate on, please take them down. On
Speaker 2: the comments, I have no problem, it's just the people
Speaker 2: that get rude. I don't. I have a very low
Speaker 2: tolerance for these overtly just like flat out rude behaviors
Speaker 2: where you start name calling, you start making judgments upon
Speaker 2: our family and the way we do things like I'm sorry,
Speaker 2: I'm not here for it.
Speaker 3: I think a lot of times like it's funny because
Speaker 3: I have that initial reaction to where I'm like, oh yeah,
Speaker 3: and I want to like Kermit the Frog on.
Speaker 2: Them, Oh, you're that person.
Speaker 3: But then sometimes, like I have realized, if you just
Speaker 3: like take a breath and then you just talk to
Speaker 3: people like you can really find some common ground with them,
Speaker 3: and sometimes it's just a misunderstanding or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure, you've done really well in that regard.
Speaker 2: And like I ran into some people in town earlier
Speaker 2: this week and they brought up just some of the
Speaker 2: critiques and criticisms they see that we get, and they're like, oh,
Speaker 2: I know how you put up with it and how
Speaker 2: you do it. And I told them until the point of
Speaker 2: you know what, I'd rather you hate me for everything
Speaker 2: it is that we are, rather than love me for
Speaker 2: something that we're not. And that's kind of the philosophy
Speaker 2: mentality that we've always operated with. So if we don't
Speaker 2: do it for you, great, I wish you'd stuck around,
Speaker 2: But if you're making a decision to go elsewhere, so
Speaker 2: we we'd.
Speaker 3: Rather be your shadow whiskey, then everyone's cut of tea.
Speaker 2: That's correct, mama. All right, let's jump into a video
Speaker 2: number one, the one that we referenced here. We will
Speaker 2: reat you don't Okay, you have a little tea leaf there.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, it's like drinking sand in Jeremy.
Speaker 1: Let's jump into our video on my health journey, I
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Speaker 4: If you're watching this video, perhaps you know that feeling
Speaker 4: when you're scrolling through Instagram at eleven PM, seeing your
Speaker 4: old college friends at some dinner party you weren't invited to,
Speaker 4: and suddenly you're hit with this weird mix of fomo
Speaker 4: and existential dread. Like sure, you know to try not
Speaker 4: to take things personally, but at the same time, it
Speaker 4: makes you feel like something is wrong with you, that
Speaker 4: you're not good enough. That's something the entire generation is
Speaker 4: grappling with, the slow, painful dissolution of meaningful adult friendships.
Speaker 4: There's a big misconception that the loneliness epidemic is only
Speaker 4: felt by introverts al those staying at home with no hobbies.
Speaker 4: The reality is everyone is feeling it. Society has fundamentally
Speaker 4: changed a lot the past decade, and people's expectations for
Speaker 4: friendships have become higher and higher as we move towards
Speaker 4: an individualistic society. So, although you've probably heard it plenty
Speaker 4: of times, you're not alone. The research and studies are
Speaker 4: coming out and it's affected society in many subtle ways.
Speaker 4: The Great friendship Recession the uncomfortable truth we're living through
Speaker 4: what researchers are calling a friendship recession. This isn't just
Speaker 4: millennial whining. The data backs it up. Since nineteen ninety,
Speaker 4: the number of Americans who say they have no close
Speaker 4: friends has quadrupled. Among people aged twenty three thirty two,
Speaker 4: the average number of close friends has dropped from three
Speaker 4: point four to one point nine in just the last decade.
Speaker 4: So why is this the case? Well, on one hand,
Speaker 4: there's no doubt that people are trying to be their
Speaker 4: best versions. Lately, with social media and everyone comparing themselves
Speaker 4: to the best of the best on a global scale,
Speaker 4: it's no surprise that people's standards in both themselves and
Speaker 4: others has risen. Here's where it gets interesting from a
Speaker 4: psychological perspective. Kal Jung, the famous Swiss psychologist, wrote about
Speaker 4: something called individuation, basically the process of becoming who you're
Speaker 4: meant to be rather than whose society expects you to be.
Speaker 4: Sounds empowering, right. Here's the thing. True individuation was never
Speaker 4: meant to happen in isolation. It requires witnesses, mirrors, people
Speaker 4: who can reflect back.
Speaker 2: To you who you're becoming.
Speaker 4: In other words, you literally need friends to become yourself.
Speaker 4: Yet our culture has sold us this myth of rugged
Speaker 4: individualism that says needing others is weakness. It praises isolation
Speaker 4: and being lone wolf and the fantasy of emerging victorious.
Speaker 4: Think about it. When was the last time you saw
Speaker 4: a movie where the climax was about maintaining a friendship
Speaker 4: rather than finding a romantic love. You've been culturally programmed
Speaker 4: to see friendship as optional and nice to have, rather
Speaker 4: than essential for psychological health. Meanwhile, your nervous system is
Speaker 4: screaming for connection because it is designed to evolved in
Speaker 4: small tribes where social bonds literally meant survival. There's a
Speaker 4: reason why loneliness feels so bad, because it's programmed to
Speaker 4: make you feel like something is wrong with you and
Speaker 4: makes you want to reconnect the cruel irony. The very
Speaker 4: technology that was supposed to connect us has made authentic
Speaker 4: friendship harder than ever. We're more connected, yet more lonely,
Speaker 4: more informed about each other's lives, yet less intimate.
Speaker 2: All right, mama, let's talk about it. Do you think
Speaker 2: that this applies to you? The friendship recession?
Speaker 3: I mean, I think I was in a recession long
Speaker 3: before the recession began. I feel like I went bankrupt,
Speaker 3: like after high school.
Speaker 2: And do you feel like that's a good thing? Do
Speaker 2: you agree with all the video messaging? Yes? And no.
Speaker 3: I don't feel like this guy understands introverts. So I
Speaker 3: think that most people probably do you feel this way,
Speaker 3: especially with social media. But what this person or I
Speaker 3: don't know if it was ar voice or whatever, yeah,
Speaker 3: or what this psychologist is missing is that introverts don't
Speaker 3: feel that loneliness, and they don't feel like they're missing
Speaker 3: out when they see a picture of their friends all
Speaker 3: out to eat, Like you might feel like, oh, I
Speaker 3: wasn't invited, and it's more of like an insult thing,
Speaker 3: but you don't wish you were there.
Speaker 2: I know the answers to this question. Do you the
Speaker 2: joy of missing.
Speaker 3: Joy of missing out? Like when I see I'm a
Speaker 3: true introvert and always have been, and then when I
Speaker 3: see a bunch of people out doing something, I feel
Speaker 3: relieved that I'm in my living room.
Speaker 2: And I always joke with Melissam that you want to
Speaker 2: get me something from our birthday, make plans, and then
Speaker 2: on the day of my birthday, cancel those plans. We're grumps.
Speaker 3: Like even trips, Like if a trip is planned and
Speaker 3: then I find out that it's not happening, I'm like.
Speaker 2: Like, I just I get how this comes across. But
Speaker 2: I and like I said, I already know the answer
Speaker 2: to this question.
Speaker 1: True.
Speaker 3: True, it's being true introverts. And I think if you're
Speaker 3: an extra or you're not a true introvert, you don't
Speaker 3: understand the minds.
Speaker 2: Yeah, do you have a list of friends currently?
Speaker 3: I have people I do.
Speaker 2: There are six of.
Speaker 3: Them are there all in the house.
Speaker 2: Their names are Melissa and ave Hukaimani.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I have people that I care about that I
Speaker 3: would consider I guess I would consider them friends. But
Speaker 3: I'm just not a good friend person. Like I'm not
Speaker 3: my friends. I don't necessarily go and hang out with.
Speaker 3: But I mean, we just had we just had the fires,
Speaker 3: you know, breakout in our area, and like I was
Speaker 3: literally up like calling a couple that I consider to
Speaker 3: be on a friend absolutely, and so I mean I
Speaker 3: would do anything for them, but I probably won't go
Speaker 3: to a movie with you.
Speaker 2: What is a friendship entail? At this point they always
Speaker 2: try to tell people like, you don't want to be
Speaker 2: friends with me, You don't want to be friends with us,
Speaker 2: because we're not. We're very boring. For one and two,
Speaker 2: we're workaholics. Like we alluded to year in the first
Speaker 2: half of the episode, we work through Damna, and.
Speaker 3: When we're not working, we carry around a big, hot,
Speaker 3: steamy side dish of guilt, parental guilt for taking any
Speaker 3: amount of time away from our children. And so if
Speaker 3: we have a day where we're not working, we're with
Speaker 3: our children and we're trying to do individual activities with them.
Speaker 3: I mean throwing the ball and stuff too, but you
Speaker 3: know what I mean, like you, I will just wait
Speaker 3: to throw the ball with you in the evening, and
Speaker 3: like that is so much more important than going and
Speaker 3: getting a drink with somebody.
Speaker 2: I go back. I had we had somebody that I
Speaker 2: used to work with over the police apartment and come
Speaker 2: by to visit, and he was asking about whether or
Speaker 2: not I've been keeping in touch with everybody there that
Speaker 2: I would consider a friend back from the police apartment.
Speaker 2: I told him, it's kind of just waned over time,
Speaker 2: which is unfortunate, and if you happen to be watching
Speaker 2: them that this isn't again. I'm not trying to throw
Speaker 2: up like a steamy dish of guilt with anybody here,
Speaker 2: because I'm just as responsible in this situations that Greeks.
Speaker 2: I just you kind of lose touch with people over time.
Speaker 2: And yeah, I don't know that I personally, I mean,
Speaker 2: I do know. I don't really have anybody that I
Speaker 2: would call like a best friend currently because you said
Speaker 2: it is my best friend, Yeah, it's Melissa, And I
Speaker 2: don't necessarily think that there's anything wrong with that. And
Speaker 2: then when it comes to being like a you know,
Speaker 2: a good, platonic, reliable friend. I always try to lay
Speaker 2: off for people like that's that you don't want me
Speaker 2: as your friend. That sounds horrible awful to say, Like
Speaker 2: I understand how that sounds saying it out loud, but
Speaker 2: it's the reality of the matter.
Speaker 3: Did you hear that guy, that Manisphere guy? Navy I
Speaker 3: did a little podcast on Right Side Up on her
Speaker 3: channel about that guy who says, like, your wife can't
Speaker 3: be your friend.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I saw that one. Sorry, Nobil,
Speaker 2: you can't watch.
Speaker 3: Then Vie's Right Side Up.
Speaker 2: I don't watch everything. Here's another thing that people would
Speaker 2: probably be surprised by. I don't watch all the stuff
Speaker 2: we put online, even our own stuff. I watch it
Speaker 2: just to make sure that it's good to go, and
Speaker 2: then once it's out, I'm like, we're on to the
Speaker 2: next one.
Speaker 3: So that's funny.
Speaker 2: You just probably have a better like comprehension of what
Speaker 2: it is that we put out online, more so than
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 3: Well, there is a guy that's pretty popular in the
Speaker 3: whole Manisphere movement, and he's like an older guy totally
Speaker 3: reminds me of one of the commanders that would be
Speaker 3: in handmade stale. I know, I reference that show all
Speaker 3: the time, and it's because I swear it's coming true.
Speaker 3: And he said that wives cannot be their husband's friends,
Speaker 3: that men need man or friends to connect, and they're like,
Speaker 3: your wife is not your friend, they are your wife.
Speaker 3: And if you make them your friend, then you ruin
Speaker 3: like that romantic connection, and that you also like you're
Speaker 3: in the friend zone, and that also you lose like
Speaker 3: the hierarchy of being in your family, Like he wants
Speaker 3: to be like the king of his family and his
Speaker 3: wife to be like subservient friends and you're more equal,
Speaker 3: and he finds that inappropriate we are equal.
Speaker 2: I don't necessarily feel that way. I mean, I understand
Speaker 2: where they're coming from with that, but I don't agree.
Speaker 2: I think you should be best friends with the person
Speaker 2: that you just spent you decide to spend the rest
Speaker 2: of your life with, that you partner up with, you
Speaker 2: do life with. Yeah, I think there is a benefit
Speaker 2: to men hanging out with men. There are a lot
Speaker 2: of like men's social clubs that have been popping up
Speaker 2: more recently. This has become like a thing online. I
Speaker 2: told you about that other one this morning where it's
Speaker 2: younger people like gen Z, people who are saying no
Speaker 2: to the entire AI social media complex.
Speaker 3: Yeah, what was that conference called.
Speaker 2: I don't remember currently, but they basically go there and
Speaker 2: then like rather than having like tech CEOs come by
Speaker 2: and give speeches, they do talks on like artists and
Speaker 2: crafts or how to date, how to flirt and how
Speaker 2: to date without the utilization of apps, which I'm all
Speaker 2: in favor for it.
Speaker 3: That needs to be taught. Well, it was stuff like
Speaker 3: that used to be taught back in the day of
Speaker 3: like how to be a gentleman, how to approach a woman,
Speaker 3: how do kiss their hand.
Speaker 2: It's all just become emphasized on because the world's gotten
Speaker 2: so freaking crazy. You know, these damn kids don't know
Speaker 2: how to speak to one another, even our own children,
Speaker 2: because so much communication is done online. That's part of
Speaker 2: the video that I did actually agree with is that
Speaker 2: now we have social media and because of that, it
Speaker 2: serves as a substitute for so many of our friendships.
Speaker 2: Like I would say, I'm probably still relatively close with
Speaker 2: a lot of the people that I grew up with
Speaker 2: back in Hoy. You know, we've met up like with
Speaker 2: with Sean Dona Texas a.
Speaker 3: Couple of every couple of years.
Speaker 2: Yeah, every couple of years. But none of us, at
Speaker 2: least for myself, Like none of us are on the phone,
Speaker 2: like hey, just checking in, seeing how you're doing. And
Speaker 2: I think at one point in time that was of
Speaker 2: the utmost importance when it came to maintaining those friendships
Speaker 2: and relationships. But now, because of social media, we see
Speaker 2: everything it is that people are doing, so we don't
Speaker 2: have to ask those questions. I can go and visit
Speaker 2: you for the first time in ten years and still
Speaker 2: have a feel as though, like I know what it
Speaker 2: is you've been doing and experiencing, and that really sucks
Speaker 2: because it takes the intimacy out of those relationships.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I think we also forget like did somebody
Speaker 3: tell me that? Or did I see it online? Like
Speaker 3: you just sort of know what's going on with everybody,
Speaker 3: so you don't pick up the phone and call and
Speaker 3: ask you've seen their kids, you know, if their dog died,
Speaker 3: you know if their mother passed.
Speaker 2: You with family, I feel like it's become and it's
Speaker 2: terribly terribly tragic. I don't like it, but I'm guilty
Speaker 2: of participating in this regormor it's it's.
Speaker 3: Even birthdays, you know, like birthday cards. Yeah, when we
Speaker 3: had Nevella, she's got like forty congratulation cards, you know,
Speaker 3: because it was two thousand and six. And now with
Speaker 3: Micah's birth.
Speaker 2: Nobody cared.
Speaker 3: Eighteen years later, he got two cards and the b
Speaker 3: babies up.
Speaker 2: Let's take a quick little pause. We'll jump back into
Speaker 2: this conversation. Apologies, guys, this comes with doing the podcast
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Speaker 2: Apologies, very professional. This is what comes with doing the
Speaker 2: podcast back here in the house now.
Speaker 3: I mean, it's like he heard us talking about his cards. Yeah,
Speaker 3: so he got two cards. And it's not because I
Speaker 3: think nobody cared about our fifth child, and maybe that
Speaker 3: was part of it. It's like you already have something,
Speaker 3: but it's just a different time. Even birthday cards, I
Speaker 3: mean in the when it was your birthday as a kid,
Speaker 3: cards used to come in the mail, and now they
Speaker 3: don't come in the mail anymore, and people don't send
Speaker 3: wedding cards and everything like that. I mean, Hallmark was massive.
Speaker 3: You would go to Hallmark, you would pick a card.
Speaker 3: You would go to a birthday party and you would
Speaker 3: get you know, you would go pick out a card
Speaker 3: and everyone's presence had the big blue or pink envelope
Speaker 3: and you'd try to find the correlating envelope to the
Speaker 3: card and make sure it fit. I mean, that was
Speaker 3: the Hallmark experience. They had the sticker wall with the
Speaker 3: little stickers on the role. My mom would let us
Speaker 3: pick ten little sticker squares. Like, yeah, that's gone, we've
Speaker 3: lost all that.
Speaker 2: What do you make of the portion of the video
Speaker 2: where he was talking about needing that that feedback, that reciprocation,
Speaker 2: so that you know who it is that you are.
Speaker 2: You can't you can't come into your own and be
Speaker 2: completely fulfilled and have this sense of identity without the
Speaker 2: feedback from others. You agree with that.
Speaker 3: Now, I find that to be like a weird socially
Speaker 3: like socialist.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you should allow other people to tell you who
Speaker 2: it is that you are, right.
Speaker 3: Like, why do you need the feedback of somebody else
Speaker 3: to tell you who you are? And I think that's
Speaker 3: something that we lose with, like sending your kids to school,
Speaker 3: any school, because when you go to a school, and
Speaker 3: I'm not I'm not making this episode about knocking schools,
Speaker 3: but when you send a child to school, they're you know,
Speaker 3: everybody's very unique. Toddlers are they're weird and there and
Speaker 3: they're fun loving and they're free spirited and they do
Speaker 3: whatever they want.
Speaker 2: They make chips away that individualism.
Speaker 3: Yeah, like you know, Mica runs around making piggy noises
Speaker 3: because he thinks it's funny. But if he went to
Speaker 3: school and he did that and somebody said that's weird,
Speaker 3: he wouldn't do it anymore. And so I think part
Speaker 3: of that is like, okay, no, but you need to
Speaker 3: adapt to be normal. But at the same time, I
Speaker 3: think that when you adapt because you want to be accepted.
Speaker 3: It's part of the human spirit to want to be
Speaker 3: accepted and to fit in and not be no one.
Speaker 3: No kid wants to be the weird kid. It's not
Speaker 3: a good thing to be the weird kid.
Speaker 2: It is a good thing to be a weird kid.
Speaker 3: Not in school, not in school, but in life it is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. You want to stand out. You don't
Speaker 2: want to be like everybody else. And when conformity is
Speaker 2: the name of the game, that stuff that we usually
Speaker 2: opt out on, which I guess in part is home school.
Speaker 3: Yeah, ever, so weird and so our kids are so
Speaker 3: unique because no one's ever told them that they're weird.
Speaker 2: Right, and again to go back, it's that process of
Speaker 2: refinement of like, yay, I got teased for that, so
Speaker 2: I'm not going to do that anymore. But maybe it
Speaker 2: was something that made.
Speaker 3: You happy, yeah, or something that was like truly a
Speaker 3: passion of yours, or something that you can tie.
Speaker 2: Back into exactly what it is we were saying at
Speaker 2: the start of this episode. You can't rely on other
Speaker 2: people in this case, so many of you out there
Speaker 2: who view what it is we do. You can't take
Speaker 2: that feedback and allow it to shape you and mold
Speaker 2: you into who it is you think somebody else wants
Speaker 2: you to be. You have to be yourself.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And that's hard to do. I mean, it's really hard.
Speaker 3: To do as a content creator because you get so
Speaker 3: much feedback positive, negative, different opinions and different suggestions, and
Speaker 3: they and.
Speaker 2: People do allow it for it to affect them.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they do. They'll change everything that They'll change everything
Speaker 3: that they do, and then you lose your Now you
Speaker 3: are performing for views, and you're performing for what's going
Speaker 3: to do well in retention and what you think that
Speaker 3: people want to see, but that doesn't necessarily line up
Speaker 3: with who you are, and now you lose yourself.
Speaker 2: I tell you all the time when I have like
Speaker 2: so many social interactions in a day, Like there are
Speaker 2: been days where we drove down a Spokane while you're
Speaker 2: promoting your last book, and like we're shaking hands, meeting people,
Speaker 2: and it's great. Don't get me wrong, it's great. Well,
Speaker 2: my social battery, especially with how we live now so isolated,
Speaker 2: it dwindles very very rapidly. And that's something that I'm
Speaker 2: not necessarily happy about. It's just it's like, my this
Speaker 2: is a bad word to use, but my tolerance for
Speaker 2: having these like casual social interactions is just fallen off the.
Speaker 3: Data because we don't do it very often. I actually
Speaker 3: really enjoyed that experience because.
Speaker 2: You're more social than I am, though.
Speaker 3: I'm more social, like in the moment, but like, if
Speaker 3: given a choice, do you want to go or not?
Speaker 3: I will usually not want to go, But then once
Speaker 3: I go, I usually have fun.
Speaker 2: I feel like physical exhaustion after days I after words,
Speaker 2: I do. I'm using that as an example because I
Speaker 2: distinctly remember making the two and a half hour drive
Speaker 2: back from Spokane just being like early morning. It wasn't
Speaker 2: early morning, long day, but just you know, having to
Speaker 2: not having to again. I'm not trying to make this
Speaker 2: out to sound like burden somebody means, but having these
Speaker 2: very friendly, like again fantastic interactions with so many you like,
Speaker 2: I just like my it's like I'm out of shape,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, because we live so isolated
Speaker 2: and I don't get this regular interaction with people out
Speaker 2: in the world. Like it just it wears me down
Speaker 2: a lot faster. Now.
Speaker 3: I like that experience because like, to me, those were
Speaker 3: such a die hard people that like showed up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, don't take this wrong, Yeah I know, I don't.
Speaker 3: Mean I thought that was like to me, that was
Speaker 3: actually something that I really enjoyed, and it is rare
Speaker 3: that I enjoy social interactions.
Speaker 2: But let me terrify since I said that, because I
Speaker 2: don't want this to sound bad. No, I really just
Speaker 2: genuinely don't. I love the interact, Like it's very uplifting
Speaker 2: in the moment, but in a day where there's so
Speaker 2: many rapid like ups and down.
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe if you meet like forty people or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it just it's my social batteries just it runs.
Speaker 2: It doesn't run the way that it once did when
Speaker 2: you know, also having to go to work every day
Speaker 2: and do you like bounce from house to house and
Speaker 2: deal with people or go back to the pre secondary
Speaker 2: interactions far far different interactions, which I'm so incredibly grateful for.
Speaker 2: I guess what I'm saying is I think I feel
Speaker 2: like we have adapted to living. I mean, we can
Speaker 2: go a week here and not see anybody outside of
Speaker 2: like the delivery guys that show up.
Speaker 3: Literally there are friends, and that's a rare in the world.
Speaker 2: And I get that most people don't function like that,
Speaker 2: But I.
Speaker 3: Make friends with your FedEx guy, you know that you
Speaker 3: live really Yeah, I.
Speaker 2: Just found this entire concept so interesting because yeah, we
Speaker 2: are most definitely one of those people or some of
Speaker 2: those people that don't really have the best friend or
Speaker 2: group of friends that get go out and do things socially.
Speaker 2: I mentioned to you the whole third stop concept to
Speaker 2: where the third stop is missing in so many people's
Speaker 2: day to day life nowadays, the overwhelming majority of us
Speaker 2: will just bounce between home and work. I'm at home,
Speaker 2: I'm relaxing. I'm probably tinkering on my phone on social media,
Speaker 2: which is tragically, tragically sad. I go to work, I'm
Speaker 2: only half checked in there because I don't genuinely care
Speaker 2: about what's happening here. I mean, how many of us
Speaker 2: am I describing right now? I know that this is
Speaker 2: probably the case for me at one point when I'm
Speaker 2: still plugged into the you know, the go to work
Speaker 2: everyday world.
Speaker 3: But yeah, no, I think that's true. And yeah, the
Speaker 3: third stop would be, you know, like stopping by the
Speaker 3: bar to drink with friends, or going hitting around a
Speaker 3: golf or isn't just a Bible.
Speaker 2: Study know so many people don't have that that social outlet,
Speaker 2: that third stop is where I was going with that,
Speaker 2: and it's it's really really sad.
Speaker 3: Well, a lot of people are losing their hobbies too,
Speaker 3: I mean, not necessarily in this family. We are the
Speaker 3: family of hobbies. I have no hobbies. As Jeremy says,
Speaker 3: he's always like I give him a hard time about
Speaker 3: his many many hobbies because there's been many many.
Speaker 2: Who's thought about this.
Speaker 3: Okay, I think this is a man.
Speaker 2: This is a mad thing. Here's where we're going with this.
Speaker 2: I over the years, over the last you know, twenty
Speaker 2: plus years that you and I have known we've known
Speaker 2: one another, I've had a number of hobbies. I like hobbies,
Speaker 2: and I always express concern from Melissa because she doesn't
Speaker 2: seem to have any, and that to me, that part
Speaker 2: of it's weird, especially with this hard as muscle work.
Speaker 3: My children are my hobby. Like I enjoy my children.
Speaker 3: I like to enjoy my old man horses, and I
Speaker 3: like to grow food. My hobby is like you know,
Speaker 3: horse into nutrition.
Speaker 2: You got the horse. That's become an obsession. That is
Speaker 2: not a hobby.
Speaker 3: Hobby obsessions thin line. So I like stuff like that,
Speaker 3: and I like to I like things that I can
Speaker 3: apply to my everyday life. And I like what I like,
Speaker 3: Like I haven't really changed. Me at ten years old
Speaker 3: and me now forty three is pretty much the same girl.
Speaker 3: Same like I like my horses. I like babies. That's
Speaker 3: that does and like five or six.
Speaker 2: Okay for me, what has there been? There has been
Speaker 2: kayak fishing.
Speaker 3: Oh, you are jumping way ahead. Okay. There has been
Speaker 3: bonzie trees, bonzize little that he would cut with little scissors.
Speaker 2: There's been told me geeking out on like gardening and
Speaker 2: self sufficiency. That's how we end up with the meat rabbits.
Speaker 2: That was my doing, my fault, even though Melissa is
Speaker 2: the quote unquote rabbit queen on YouTube. That was my thing.
Speaker 2: What else has there been? That?
Speaker 3: Where I got run golfing, golfing, biking, biking.
Speaker 2: I got really into biking and mountain biking.
Speaker 3: I was actually barefoot running barefoot running for two years.
Speaker 3: Were shoes with the toes. He bought me a pair.
Speaker 2: You bought a pair with it.
Speaker 3: No, you wanted me a pair. So we would walk
Speaker 3: around looking like frogs together.
Speaker 2: Speaking of social social things that we've done.
Speaker 3: But wait, let's stop for a second. Okay, Now, these
Speaker 3: were obsessions like I need this two hundred dollars mini
Speaker 3: tree that looks like a big tree, but it lives
Speaker 3: in the house.
Speaker 2: You bought me the one because I'm.
Speaker 3: A supportive wife. I support all the hobbies of the
Speaker 3: many men in my life.
Speaker 2: She gives me a hard time.
Speaker 3: All my little men, I support their hobbies by buying things,
Speaker 3: by by seeking out opportunities for them to go and
Speaker 3: explore these things. And I swear by the time we
Speaker 3: get to the event, they're no longer. The thing about
Speaker 3: your your hobbies and Eli's hobbies is you guys drop
Speaker 3: them so quick. They drop them as quick as they
Speaker 3: can see a commercial or a movie, or somebody walks
Speaker 3: by with a T shirt on, and they're like, you.
Speaker 2: Guys, if you've been falling along a while, you know, Eli,
Speaker 2: child number four has had bull riding.
Speaker 3: Oh you're skipping ahead ahead, he's had bull riding chickens. Currently,
Speaker 3: it started with chickens, Okay.
Speaker 2: Currently he's geeking out on stadiums, like stadium architecture, the
Speaker 2: history of it.
Speaker 3: Again, if any of you guys have any connection to
Speaker 3: any stadiums, specifically in the Seattle area or in the
Speaker 3: Nashville area, I'm trying to think of places we're going
Speaker 3: to be. If you have any connections to any of
Speaker 3: these stadiums, Eli would like a tour so that he
Speaker 3: can then drop that interest and move on.
Speaker 2: Well, it's not a matter of dropping you see. This
Speaker 2: is the criticism that comes from I don't drop these
Speaker 2: these hobbies.
Speaker 3: Really because that little two hundred and fifty feed dollar
Speaker 3: mini tree I bought you just fried in the backyard
Speaker 3: because you no longer No, that wasn't a reason.
Speaker 2: I don't know what happens to that tree. I still
Speaker 2: love Bonzie trees. I still love things like barefoot running.
Speaker 2: I'm enamored with running. Running, I would say, is my
Speaker 2: current obsession hobby. I had a horrible run yesterday. Is
Speaker 2: something you saw. I hurt my back? How was my
Speaker 2: first run?
Speaker 3: You're going to run that marathon and then you're going
Speaker 3: to drop it like a bad.
Speaker 2: Half after hurting my back. That's not true. That's not true. Really,
Speaker 2: what the issue is, there's just not enough time in
Speaker 2: the day to, you know, really indulge in all of
Speaker 2: your hobbies. And yeah, I think it is more so
Speaker 2: of a man thing because the women in our family
Speaker 2: really don't seem to have.
Speaker 3: Hobbies or women just like what we like. We've all
Speaker 3: let us know, done on the company. We like what
Speaker 3: we like. We're comfortable in that. We don't feel like
Speaker 3: we need to go out and see, like we don't
Speaker 3: zero in on one thing and then have to learn
Speaker 3: everything about it. I just heard Matt wallsh talking about
Speaker 3: this fish keeping is his wife's giving him a hard
Speaker 3: time because now all of a sudden he's decided he's
Speaker 3: going to be a fish keeper. She's like, why are
Speaker 3: you having fish? And he's like, it's called fish keeping.
Speaker 2: That's another thing I could see myself totally geeking out
Speaker 2: on this. Has already told me I'm not allowed to
Speaker 2: get an aquarium.
Speaker 3: So if all of a sudden there is a huge
Speaker 3: saltwater tank behind us, you don't know that fish keeping
Speaker 3: is Jeremy's newest.
Speaker 2: Hobby right behind me in the new podcast, So you
Speaker 2: a big aquarium, swear.
Speaker 3: And also the fish will be floating at the top
Speaker 3: because fish keeping is no longer on the agenda.
Speaker 2: No, I think men back me up on this down
Speaker 2: in the comment section. We have hobbies and we're not
Speaker 2: like letting them go or abandoning them. Abandoning them there's
Speaker 2: just not enough time in the day abandon them.
Speaker 3: This is like Nevella was saying that Eli, I don't
Speaker 3: I have you to give a hard time too. So
Speaker 3: we were saying we could have like a graveyard or
Speaker 3: like a man room that just has a different wall
Speaker 3: for like each of the rip hobbies that have come across,
Speaker 3: so like for Eli, the first obsession was when he
Speaker 3: was one years old and it was chickens. Chickens, Chicken
Speaker 3: loved chickens. I mean we had a chicken birthday party,
Speaker 3: remember the chicken birthday party. And then it became tractors,
Speaker 3: and then from tractors it became dinosaurs and fossils, and
Speaker 3: then from then it became space. You guys came around
Speaker 3: during the space obsession. Remember when he would wear the
Speaker 3: every day at Mars time or Mars hour.
Speaker 2: Mars hours, so there's a time of day where the
Speaker 2: lighting is supposed to resemble what the environment would be
Speaker 2: like on Mars, and so he would put his astronaut
Speaker 2: suit on. He'd pretend he was on Mars. Nothing wrong
Speaker 2: with that.
Speaker 3: It was before Golden hour, was it after? No, it
Speaker 3: was right after Golden hour when the sun has set
Speaker 3: and you still have that glow. Apparently that's what Mars
Speaker 3: hour is. And he would wear the NASA suit and
Speaker 3: then so we brought him to the museums. We did
Speaker 3: all this and all of a sudden, he wasn't the
Speaker 3: Mars suit was no longer. Then he saw top Gun.
Speaker 3: That's all. It took one movie, The guy obsession Fighter.
Speaker 2: He knows a lot of you guys saw that.
Speaker 3: He got to go fly an airplane, which was amazing.
Speaker 3: Thank you Chad for that experience. He he got to
Speaker 3: fly the airplane. And then pretty much after that day
Speaker 3: he was.
Speaker 2: Like, no, I still he's still he's still into all
Speaker 2: of these things again to my.
Speaker 3: Point, I mean, yeah, but like he can he could
Speaker 3: name every fighter jet. We took him to the Museum
Speaker 3: of Flight in Seattle, amazing museum if you're ever in Seattle,
Speaker 3: and then he was just sort of over it and
Speaker 3: then he just moved on. So during that time, we
Speaker 3: ended up going on a trip to Texas and we
Speaker 3: just were trying to find things to entertain ourselves. We
Speaker 3: went to the PBR just because it happened to be
Speaker 3: in town that night.
Speaker 2: And we were like, let's go shout out to the PBR.
Speaker 3: He saw that and it was like home and he
Speaker 3: bought a cowboy hat, the boots, the chaps. He was
Speaker 3: mutton busting. He wouldn't stay off Manny. He wanted a
Speaker 3: pony and then the pony bucked him off. He thought
Speaker 3: that wasn't very fun. So then he started like there
Speaker 3: started to be like chinks in the chain, you know.
Speaker 3: And so then we went and we went to the
Speaker 3: I went to the PBR, and I said, I got
Speaker 3: a little boy that was like obsessed. He's going to
Speaker 3: be a bull rider for sure. He went and he
Speaker 3: met all these PBR writers and then he was like fulfilled.
Speaker 3: Then when we were at the PBR, he was just
Speaker 3: sort of looking around and he's like, this stadium's really cool.
Speaker 3: And he's like and he's like, this is an arena.
Speaker 3: Like if you think this is cool, you should check
Speaker 3: out NFL stadiums. And so he went home and he did.
Speaker 3: Now he knows the history of every stadium when it
Speaker 3: was built, what architect built it, when it was torn down.
Speaker 2: It just a little patch of the Astro turf from
Speaker 2: Veterans Stadium in Philadelphia, and he loves it.
Speaker 3: Yesterday in the mail, I get this package and I
Speaker 3: was like, what the heck is this? So I open
Speaker 3: it up and it's another piece of turf from.
Speaker 2: Astro Stadium as Astro. She loves. That's like his favorite stadium.
Speaker 3: Okay, so now he's going on too eBay.
Speaker 2: Oh, he bought them.
Speaker 3: He bought that and didn't tell me about it and
Speaker 3: said that he would work it off. It was twelve
Speaker 3: ninety five, so he has to do some chores. He
Speaker 3: bought a piece of He thought that perhaps I would
Speaker 3: say no, So we had never talk about not using
Speaker 3: Mom's credit card on eBay. He bought a piece of
Speaker 3: turf from astro Stadium and then the okay, Astrodome told
Speaker 3: me that it's highly toxic. So he's now put it
Speaker 3: into a zip log and I mean so now I
Speaker 3: feel like that's going to go on his stadium wall.
Speaker 3: So we're gonna It's.
Speaker 2: A point being we have hobbies, we have obsessions.
Speaker 3: And as women have no interest.
Speaker 2: We don't leaven behind and has no friends.
Speaker 3: I don't know how we could possibly as women, have
Speaker 3: any hobbies when we're trying to keep up with the
Speaker 3: many hobbies of the men in our lives.
Speaker 2: You're welcome. Let's begin to shut this one down. I'm roasting.
Speaker 3: I'm so hot, so hot like a potato.
Speaker 2: And now the sun's beaming down on the floor and
Speaker 2: bouncing back at me. So this episode number one here
Speaker 2: from the loft. Welcome, thank you for being here. Anything
Speaker 2: else you wanna plug in here?
Speaker 3: No, no, I think we just need some some air,
Speaker 3: we need some plants.
Speaker 2: We're gonna do better.
Speaker 3: I promise you got to get better. We will bearing with.
Speaker 2: Us, we will refine this process in this setup, and
Speaker 2: hopefully things get better over time. So until then, you guys,
Speaker 2: take care, God bless thank you for being here. We'll
Speaker 2: try to do better the next time and we'll see
Speaker 2: you next week.
Speaker 3: I am so hot, brain is melting. You got these
Speaker 3: camamel flowers in the
Speaker 1: Bag right through