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Speaker 1: Welcome to Hope for the Journey, the podcast for women

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Speaker 1: over forty who are ready to rise, rebuild, and reclaim

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Speaker 1: their story. I'm your host, Monica, and each week you'll

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Speaker 1: hear real, raw comeback stories from women who have walked

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Speaker 1: through the fire and found purpose on the other side.

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Speaker 1: If you're navigating change, chasing a dream, or simply searching

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Speaker 1: for your next.

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Speaker 2: Step, you're not alone.

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Speaker 1: This is your place for courage, community, and the reminder

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Speaker 1: that it's never too late to rewrite the end. Today

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Speaker 1: on Hope for the Journey, this episode is for the

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Speaker 1: Christian woman who has tried everything, and I'm calling it

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Speaker 1: making peace with your body. I'll be back with that

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Speaker 1: in just a moment, right after a word from our sponsors. Hi,

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Speaker 1: I'm Monica, and this is Hope for the Journey, and

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Speaker 1: this episode is for every woman that's tried everything, gained weight,

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Speaker 1: lost weight, and somehow it's just never enough. I'm joined

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Speaker 1: today by a fellow Life Audio podcaster, Heather Creek Moore. Heather,

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Speaker 1: good to have you here today.

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Speaker 2: It's great to be with you, Monica.

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Speaker 1: I really appreciate this and I appreciate the conversation. This month,

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Speaker 1: I Hope with the journey. We're talking about for the

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Speaker 1: month letting go to live free, and I really think

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Speaker 1: that making peace with our body can be a great

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Speaker 1: part of that. I'm delighted to be a part of

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Speaker 1: your forty day challenge and guys will put all of

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Speaker 1: that good stuff in the link. You know, this podcast

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Speaker 1: is for women over forty, and I think at any

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Speaker 1: age body image can be such a thing. And Heather,

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Speaker 1: she's a speaker, she's an author. She also coaches women

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Speaker 1: and helps women like me and like you who look

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Speaker 1: in the mirror and wonder about what we see and

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Speaker 1: try harder to have the perfect body, whatever that is,

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Speaker 1: and like it just doesn't happen. So Heather, again, I

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Speaker 1: appreciate the conversation, and I thought maybe we could just

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Speaker 1: start with a little bit about your journey, because you

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Speaker 1: have not been exempt for this yourself.

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Speaker 2: No, in fact, I don't think I would be qualified

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Speaker 2: to talk about it, but I hadn't journey through it myself.

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Speaker 2: But you know, Monica, my journey started well before the

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Speaker 2: aging process set in. I remember being in about the

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Speaker 2: third grade and looking in the mirror and deciding my

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Speaker 2: legs were too big, and so by middle school, my

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Speaker 2: mom was a dieter. By middle school, I was doing

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Speaker 2: whatever diet she was doing. So I was, you know,

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Speaker 2: dragged to weight watchers meetings and church basements and tried

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Speaker 2: the slim fast shakes and all the things right, the

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Speaker 2: juice fast, you name it, I tried it. And by

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Speaker 2: the time I got to high school, I'm, you know,

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Speaker 2: type a overachiever, which I find is fairly common among

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Speaker 2: women with body I magissues, quite honestly, And so by

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Speaker 2: the time I got to high school, I was like, well,

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Speaker 2: I can do better than just dieting. I don't need

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Speaker 2: to eat. And so what that started for me was

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Speaker 2: just going long periods of time, like I could get

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Speaker 2: up and get out the door and be at school

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Speaker 2: all day and you know, avoid eating all day. But

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Speaker 2: then I would get home in the evening, and of

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Speaker 2: course my teenage body was revenously hungry, and I guess

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Speaker 2: I should be grateful that I was unsuccessful at starving myself,

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Speaker 2: But then I would eat everything in sight and Monica,

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Speaker 2: I remember distinctly going to bed, I feeling like I

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Speaker 2: had failed because I had eaten, even though I promised

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Speaker 2: myself I wouldn't eat. And that continued for me well

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Speaker 2: into college. By my sophomore of college, I lost my

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Speaker 2: period for about nine months, which now most professionals could

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Speaker 2: recognize as a sign of an eating disorder. It's called

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Speaker 2: hypothalamica menorrhea. But at the time the doctor said, you're

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Speaker 2: just stressed, don't worry about it. College is stressful. And

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Speaker 2: so because I didn't have clear anorexia where I was underweight,

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Speaker 2: and because I wasn't vomiting, I didn't qualify for bolimia.

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Speaker 2: They had no idea I had an eating disorder. There

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Speaker 2: wasn't really a category for people like me who were

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Speaker 2: just always on the next diet, and so that really

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Speaker 2: continued for me. I got married at thirty thought getting

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Speaker 2: married would fix it. Oh. I was so hopeful that

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Speaker 2: my husband was going to fix my body image issues

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Speaker 2: because you know, finally, if I had a man to

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Speaker 2: affirm that I was good enough, then wouldn't that solve everything?

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Speaker 2: And I think everything got worse after I got married. Honestly,

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Speaker 2: that's a whole episode in and of itself. But this

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Speaker 2: poor man, I'm like, you know, he'd be like, you

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Speaker 2: look nice, and I'd be like, nice isn't good enough.

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Speaker 2: I have to look at the best, you know, so

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Speaker 2: you could just you can never do it right. And

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Speaker 2: it was a big disappointment to me because I really

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Speaker 2: thought they would go away as soon as I had

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Speaker 2: that ring on my finger, and they didn't. And then

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Speaker 2: I got pregnant, and again, Monica, I thought, as soon

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Speaker 2: as I have like people to keep alive, baby, yes,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, that's gonna give me something more important to

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Speaker 2: think about than my weight and my size and my

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Speaker 2: food and my exercise. So I'd bring it on. I

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Speaker 2: just need something better to do, and that'll take these

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Speaker 2: body image issues away. And of course it didn't. And

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Speaker 2: going to the doctor's office felt a whole lot like

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Speaker 2: going to weight watchers with my mom had felt. Getting

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Speaker 2: on that scale, you know, taking off heavy ear rings

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Speaker 2: and going to bathroom seven times before you go in.

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Speaker 2: Just try to make that number a little lighter. It

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Speaker 2: didn't solve it. And then I had four babies in

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Speaker 2: in just over four years. No twins wound that, so

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Speaker 2: I was pregnant for almost five years straight and or breastfeeding,

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Speaker 2: and so really, you know, all the things that I

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Speaker 2: had hoped would take these issues away didn't, And I

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Speaker 2: found myself in my late thirties honestly, cleaning the kitchen.

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Speaker 2: One day, my husband was rain fighter pilot and he

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Speaker 2: was preparing to leave the military to go into full

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Speaker 2: time ministry. And he was listening to a sermon just

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Speaker 2: through our home because no one had those little in

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Speaker 2: ear ear pods AirPods at the time. And I'm listening

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Speaker 2: to this pastor preach about modern day idolatry. And I

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Speaker 2: was raised in the church. I knew the God in

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Speaker 2: Jesus answer from age six. I knew I was fearfully

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Speaker 2: and wonderfully made. I knew that God looked at my

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Speaker 2: heart and not my dress size. I knew all the things.

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Speaker 2: And I should also add in there, Monica, I became

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Speaker 2: a fitness instructor.

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Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, you are an overchie, Heather.

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Speaker 2: I had a full time career, like a sixty seventy

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Speaker 2: hour professional career a week. But I had become a

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Speaker 2: fitness instructor because I thought, at least if I had

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Speaker 2: that credential, then I would know I was good enough.

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Speaker 2: And again it wasn't enough. So I am, let's call

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Speaker 2: it thirty seven years old in my kitchen listening to

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Speaker 2: my husband listen to this sermon. I had never thought

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Speaker 2: about a modern day idle as even a possibility. I mean,

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Speaker 2: we didn't have any statues in our home, so I thought, certainly,

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Speaker 2: I'm not an idolater, that's not a problem. And as

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Speaker 2: I listened to that sermon Monica, the pastor talked about

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Speaker 2: a modern day idol being anything that you believe will

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Speaker 2: save you that's not Jesus. And at first this might

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Speaker 2: kind of sound fuzzy, like what does that have to

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Speaker 2: do with body image? But the Holy Spirit that day

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Speaker 2: revealed to me that I really believed I was safe

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Speaker 2: for heaven right, like I knew God in Jesus solely

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Speaker 2: had me for heaven right. But for now, what I

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Speaker 2: really wanted to save me was just getting everything right

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Speaker 2: physically right, and I knew, I knew it was almost

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Speaker 2: impossible to arrive, and yet boy, that idle kept me chasing.

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Speaker 2: It was the treadmill that never stopped right because you

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Speaker 2: lose the weight and it's like, well, you're not toned enough,

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Speaker 2: or you know, you get your skin clear, but it's like,

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Speaker 2: well now it's kind of looks, you know, saggy, or

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Speaker 2: you can't get your hair just right at the same

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Speaker 2: time your skin is right at the same time your

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Speaker 2: body is right, you know it just there was always

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Speaker 2: something else to be fixed or tweaked or improved. Right.

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Speaker 2: And then there's just the changes of culture, right, because

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Speaker 2: I remember as a fitness instructor, no one wanted a bottom.

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Speaker 2: I was trying to help women work their butts off, literally,

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Speaker 2: and then fifteen years later everyone's in there getting butt implants,

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Speaker 2: trying to have a shapely bottom. I mean, it's like

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Speaker 2: you can't win for losen, right, And so so the

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Speaker 2: Holy Spirit that day kind of spoke to me, like, Heather,

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Speaker 2: this is what you've done. You have made this physical appearance,

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Speaker 2: this dieting, this exercise. You have made your body an

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Speaker 2: idol that you think will somehow save you if you

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Speaker 2: can just get the formula right. And that's not where

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Speaker 2: salvation comes from. And so that day was a big

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Speaker 2: turning point for me. I would love to say I

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Speaker 2: woke up the next morning and I never cared how

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Speaker 2: I looked. Again, that would be a lie, it's not true.

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Speaker 2: But I very much realized, oh, this is a sin problem.

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Speaker 2: I didn't think I had a sin problem. You know,

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Speaker 2: no one wants to have a sin problem. Like I

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Speaker 2: was actually a pretty quote unquote good girl and like

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Speaker 2: I was pretty righteous, like this, if this was a sin,

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Speaker 2: it really wasn't that bad of a one. Right, There's

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Speaker 2: people out there sinning much worse than I was. So

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Speaker 2: but recognizing, oh wait, the heart of this is sin

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Speaker 2: and then having something to confess that was a big

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Speaker 2: turning point for everything, like not just for my body

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Speaker 2: of magi issues, but just in my relationship with the Lord,

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Speaker 2: Like I was final that after that point, I was

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Speaker 2: able to read the Bible and understand it more. I

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Speaker 2: actually enjoyed listening to sermons. I was able to grow

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Speaker 2: in my faith in a way that I had kind

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Speaker 2: of been stagnantant for decades because I was chasing this idol,

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Speaker 2: believing I was doing a Christian life right, but yet

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Speaker 2: so distracted and so committed to this idol that I

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Speaker 2: really was someone who was trying to, you know, follow

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Speaker 2: God and Mammont and I really did have two masters.

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Speaker 2: And God had to.

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Speaker 1: Change that because you know, it's like having two masters,

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Speaker 1: but you really didn't know that you had two masters.

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Speaker 1: And I think, you know, Heather in my journey in

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Speaker 1: my family growing up, so I was the chubby child

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Speaker 1: and I was in a family of thin people. Now

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Speaker 1: we all ate the same kinds of food. So I

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Speaker 1: was like the odd person out, and so there was

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Speaker 1: a lot of teasing, just a lot of things that

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Speaker 1: might have been well intended, I want to say that,

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Speaker 1: but I really took those things in and I just

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Speaker 1: had a lot of body shame. And so I became

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Speaker 1: a Christian at thirteen. But like, not realizing that that's

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Speaker 1: an idol, I kept chasing like ways to make my

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Speaker 1: family proud, like hey, I can actually be thin. I

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Speaker 1: can do this, went to every weight watchers, all these

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Speaker 1: other things, and finally Heather and like when I was

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Speaker 1: in my forties, I lost a lot of weight and

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Speaker 1: I became a thin person. And I could not believe

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Speaker 1: the amount of people that even thought that I had

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Speaker 1: was a better example as a Christian. And I started

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Speaker 1: to see, okay, wait a minute, this is ridiculous, Like

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Speaker 1: I'm getting more attention over this weight loss than over

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Speaker 1: some of major growth that I had done in my life,

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Speaker 1: like forgiving a close friend, for betraying a confidence, or

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Speaker 1: overcoming a hardship in marriage. Just like even in Christendom,

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Speaker 1: this is a thing, like it is an idol, and

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Speaker 1: we may not realize it. It may be with the

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Speaker 1: best of intentions, and then, of course, Heather, I couldn't

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Speaker 1: keep all the weight off. I kept some off, and

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Speaker 1: so then I had to deal with like putting that

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Speaker 1: back on and listening to what people say and feeling like, gosh, Monica,

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Speaker 1: you failed again, and chasing an idol like that. It's exhausting.

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Speaker 1: And I'm sure not just for me and you, I'm

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Speaker 1: sure to all the women that are listening. It's exhausting

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Speaker 1: to try to chase a fantasy. Even when I got

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Speaker 1: to like that size four person that I thought all

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Speaker 1: my problems will be gone, I still thought I was fat,

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Speaker 1: and I would look at the old clothes and it

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Speaker 1: was just like I knew I was crazy. I just

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Speaker 1: didn't know what to do about it. And my husband,

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Speaker 1: like yours, was always very kind. He would say, you

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Speaker 1: look very nice today. I say, no, I don't I

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Speaker 1: look fat, and he'd be like, no, you don't, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, hey, mane. So I think there are lots

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Speaker 1: of women listening that we don't see it as an

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Speaker 1: idol because it's so like, it's just so embraced, right,

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Speaker 1: you know, even at the start of this year, you know,

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Speaker 1: people have their weight loss goals. And they're this and

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Speaker 1: they're that, and I live at that address to That's

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Speaker 1: why I'm joining your forty day journey because I want

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Speaker 1: to lay this down. I don't want to keep taking

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Speaker 1: it in decade after decade, and because it's harmful to us.

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Speaker 1: It separates, It is a separation from God because that's

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Speaker 1: kind of like our first love is crazy as that seems.

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Speaker 1: So where do we start? Because I know you've journeyed

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Speaker 1: a lot on this, where does a woman listening? Where

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Speaker 1: do we start?

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Speaker 2: Heather? Yeah, you know, so we don't we don't ever

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Speaker 2: want to oversimplify this, right, Like we didn't wake up

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Speaker 2: one morning and decide we're gonna have body magicians. There's

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Speaker 2: a lot of complex things that have gone into this,

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Speaker 2: but really it always comes down to Monica, what do

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Speaker 2: we really believe? And I think this is really difficult

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Speaker 2: for Christian women because I can I use our familiarity, right,

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Speaker 2: We're so familiar with the Gospel and all the God

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Speaker 2: in Jesus answers and God's Word and the scriptures that

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Speaker 2: it's like, in a way we're like, yeah, yeah, that's nice.

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Speaker 2: I believe that. And what I really need is this

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Speaker 2: false gospel of self improvement. And you do not have

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Speaker 2: to look very far to find all the evangelists of

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Speaker 2: the self false gospel of self improvement, right, I mean

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Speaker 2: it's everywhere. Right, There's a major diet company that like

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Speaker 2: presents itself as a Christian company, calling its followers disciples. No, like,

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Speaker 2: we cannot confuse these two things, right, There's nothing wrong

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Speaker 2: with deciding to pursue some health goals, but not at

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Speaker 2: the expense of everything else. And I think what happens

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Speaker 2: in this muddy area of food and body is it

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Speaker 2: becomes so important to us that we think we can

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Speaker 2: pursue it and other things, and it just doesn't actually

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Speaker 2: work out that way. It takes over.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, because what you said right there, taking over it,

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Speaker 1: that is what happened. So when I was finally successful,

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Speaker 1: whatever that is with this journey, it took everything I had.

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Speaker 1: It took right working all day and then going and

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Speaker 1: working out for a really good amount of time. I

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Speaker 1: was usually had a headache and I was mostly hungry,

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Speaker 1: and sometimes the mensus wouldn't start because I had restricted

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Speaker 1: the calories so much, which is so harmful. But yet

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Speaker 1: in my family now, not with my husband, but in

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Speaker 1: my family of origin growing up, they would just be like, well,

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Speaker 1: that's wonderful. I mean, who cares like it doesn't matter

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Speaker 1: how you know, how you feel, they'd say, Monica, it

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Speaker 1: matters how you look. And it was such a thing

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Speaker 1: when I was growing up. Every Sunday we would go

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Speaker 1: to my grandfather's house for dinner, and all the women,

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Speaker 1: even that I was a teenage girl, then went into

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Speaker 1: the living room and we weighed ourselves after dinner. That's crazy.

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Speaker 1: And everybody would say that that was all done in love.

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Speaker 1: But you know, that makes your mind. That is not

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Speaker 1: a healthy image. And even when I gave my heart

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Speaker 1: to Christ, I kept that part still thinking that that

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Speaker 1: was a good thing, like that a good Christian girl

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Speaker 1: would eat right, she would diet, she would exercise, and

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Speaker 1: like that may be true. But what we're talking about

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Speaker 1: here today is an idol. What we're talking about is

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Speaker 1: living in guilt and shame and just always feeling like

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Speaker 1: we don't measure up. And the thing is, like your

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Speaker 1: podcast is called compared to who like who? Who is?

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Speaker 1: Who are we comparing ourselves to?

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Speaker 2: Right? Right? It's often that ideal me, Right, It's I

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Speaker 2: have this picture in my head of who I'm supposed

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Speaker 2: to be. And I like to say, wherever there's an ideal,

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Speaker 2: there's an idol, right, because it's it's when we believe

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Speaker 2: that this ideal me, I'll be saved as soon as

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Speaker 2: I can be her, as soon as I can get

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Speaker 2: it all together right, And as you experienced, it just

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Speaker 2: doesn't happen. I talk to women every week that have

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Speaker 2: reached that number, and when they get there, they say, well,

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Speaker 2: this doesn't feel like I thought it was going to feel,

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Speaker 2: and must need five more pounds. It must be five

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Speaker 2: more pounds away, right, And like you shared in your

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Speaker 2: experience earlier, like there's been studies out there that show

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Speaker 2: body image issues actually get worse if you experience significant

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Speaker 2: weight loss because of exactly what you described. You start

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Speaker 2: to get all the compliments. And maybe you hadn't thought

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Speaker 2: that much about yourself before, right, And then all the

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Speaker 2: compliments come in. And you had to work so hard

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Speaker 2: and focus so much on yourself in order to get

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Speaker 2: to that size, and you get there and all the

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Speaker 2: compliments come, and then your greatest fear becomes losing it, right,

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Speaker 2: And what else can you do to keep the compliments coming,

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Speaker 2: to keep the attention coming. There's you're running out of

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Speaker 2: tricks to play.

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Speaker 1: Right exactly exactly, And it's like I would say, like you,

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Speaker 1: I would consider myself a type a person, overachiever, like

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Speaker 1: I don't want to let these people down. Right, they

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Speaker 1: saw me, they saw me do this. Some of these

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Speaker 1: people they see me on TV, like they've watched me

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Speaker 1: loose this weight, Like I've got to do this for everybody.

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Speaker 1: But it wasn't healthy. There was a real unhealthy aspect

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Speaker 1: of it, and so people would be like, but you're

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Speaker 1: so much healthier then now. It's like, oh, healthy is

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Speaker 1: not a number on a scale like that I learned.

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Speaker 1: It was such a surprise because I imagined that that

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Speaker 1: would be the perfect moment, and I still felt the

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Speaker 1: same shame and guilt. I would wake up in the

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Speaker 1: morning and just like when I was overweight and looking

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Speaker 1: for the next diet, I was thinking about what I

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Speaker 1: could what I couldn't eat, what I could wear, what

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Speaker 1: I couldn't wear, And again, Heather, that is exhausting, and

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Speaker 1: I just I don't. I don't want to live like

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Speaker 1: this anymore. That's it's a terrible way to live.

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Speaker 2: Exhausting and all consuming. And I mean the question I

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Speaker 2: would ask to anyone listening is how much of your

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Speaker 2: day is the Holy Spirit able to speak into if

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Speaker 2: every waking minute and maybe some sleeping minutes too. Thinking

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Speaker 2: about food and exercise, I mean, I think of all

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Speaker 2: the opportunities. Our number one command is love God and

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Speaker 2: love others. It's really difficult to reach outside yourself. Notice

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Speaker 2: a person in need, you know, even ask someone to

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Speaker 2: share what's upsetting them when you see you know that

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Speaker 2: person crying, or what like any scenario right when you

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Speaker 2: are so focused on self, it's really hard to live

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Speaker 2: out God's commands around loving him and loving others. It's

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Speaker 2: a lie to keep us self focused.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I thought too when I was so. I

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Speaker 1: was in my forties when I lost that weight, and

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Speaker 1: at that time my husband and I have just one

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Speaker 1: son and he was in high school, so you know,

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Speaker 1: at that age there are more sporting events. Children, they

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Speaker 1: have more things that they're doing. One of the thoughts

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Speaker 1: that I thought, and I would tell women like I

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Speaker 1: couldn't have even done all that working out with small children,

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Speaker 1: because you would need to be with your children. It

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Speaker 1: takes away from the family time. I literally had my

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Speaker 1: own cabinets with my food as opposed to the food

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Speaker 1: like that I would prepare for my husband and our son,

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Speaker 1: and I was eating something different and they let me

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Speaker 1: do it, but they did express that it made them

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Speaker 1: feel awkward. So think about that, a mom of a

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Speaker 1: teen boy setting this example, you know, And I look

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Speaker 1: back and I just think, hmm, that's regrettable. But I

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Speaker 1: really I don't want to stay that girl, don't. I

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Speaker 1: don't want to stay this person that I'm worried about

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Speaker 1: all that time. I want to be able to love

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Speaker 1: God first and to love other others well. And I'm

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Speaker 1: sure all the women listening and we're just like, okay,

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Speaker 1: but like, what do we like? What we do? How

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Speaker 1: do we do this? So I was so grateful when

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Speaker 1: I found you, Heather, and I saw that you had

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Speaker 1: this forty day challenge. I thought, well, you know, that's

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Speaker 1: a place to start, because most of the times when

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Speaker 1: God leads us through change, it's not instant and in

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Speaker 1: a moment. It's a process. It's a journey. And and

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Speaker 1: I think you said when we first started talking, I

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Speaker 1: didn't get here in a day, and you didn't get

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Speaker 1: to where you were in a day. These are thoughts

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Speaker 1: and habits and behaviors that we've been repeating for years.

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Speaker 1: Would you say to any woman who's listening, who's thinking,

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Speaker 1: you know, I'm seeing this might be an idol? Is

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Speaker 1: there hope that over time we can change?

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Speaker 2: Oh? Absolutely? In fact, on my show this month, I

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Speaker 2: am featuring stories of women who've gone through our program

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Speaker 2: and have changed, so they're telling all their stories. But

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Speaker 2: absolutely there's hope. Because you know, I mentioned it's a

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Speaker 2: sin issue, and no one really likes that. It's good news, Monica,

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Speaker 2: because if it's a sin issue, there's a cure for that. Right,

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Speaker 2: if we confess our sins, He's faithful and just to

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Speaker 2: forgive us of our sins, and it cleanses from all unrighteousness.

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Speaker 2: We have a solution. If this is a sin issue,

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Speaker 2: If this is just a.

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Speaker 3: Normal girl problem, we're hopeless. If we're just stuck with

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Speaker 3: these issues because we're female, woe is me. Every woman

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Speaker 3: in my family has it. We're hopeless, But we are

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Speaker 3: not hopeless. Right, if we can identify that root of sin,

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Speaker 3: then we can do something about it. And then, awkwardly,

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Speaker 3: I'm going to say the word awkwardly because it is

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Speaker 3: not a smooth road, Madica. This is countercultural, right, Like

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Speaker 3: I love how you said we notice weight loss more

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Speaker 3: than we notice anything else. And I have a line

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Speaker 3: in my forty Day Body Image workbook where I say,

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Speaker 3: I've never had a woman come up to me in

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Speaker 3: target and say, wow, I really see the fruit of

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Speaker 3: the spirit blooming in your life. Right, but exactly a

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Speaker 3: couple pounds she'll be rushing over, right.

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Speaker 2: And yet what are we called to? What really matters? Right?

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Speaker 2: What are we focusing on? So, yes, there is great hope.

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Speaker 2: My forty day journey is a great place to start.

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Speaker 2: I'm so excited you're going to be part of it.

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Speaker 1: I am too.

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Speaker 2: We start kind of slow the first week because I

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Speaker 2: just I don't want to throw you in the deep end.

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Speaker 2: So we could that kind of start just thinking about

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Speaker 2: like really God's intentionality behind making our bodies and what

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Speaker 2: culture says versus what scripture says. But then we dig

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Speaker 2: deep and we look at you know, maybe some of

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Speaker 2: the belief systems, things that were said over us or

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Speaker 2: to us that have stuck with us. For I work

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Speaker 2: with clients over seventies sometimes that have been you know,

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Speaker 2: the same phrase that mom said has been going around

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Speaker 2: in their head for sixty years. Right, So we dig

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Speaker 2: into some of that, and then we dig into food, Monica,

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Speaker 2: because I think we've all been on mister Toad's wild

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Speaker 2: ride following culture's diet trends, because you, like me, probably

429
00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:32,280
Speaker 2: didn't need any fat in nineteen ninety four and you've

430
00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:35,240
Speaker 2: got to twenty four and all we were supposed to

431
00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:38,000
Speaker 2: eat was fat. And that's confusing, right, I mean, it's

432
00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:40,400
Speaker 2: up and down, up and down. Eat this. It's ridiculous

433
00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:44,200
Speaker 2: and it's not good for us. It's not healthy for us.

434
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:47,960
Speaker 2: So we dig into some of that, we dig into shame,

435
00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:52,159
Speaker 2: we dig into aging, and we go to all the

436
00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:55,640
Speaker 2: places in the journey and there's a lot of content there.

437
00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,119
Speaker 2: We have a lot of women that will repeat the

438
00:23:57,160 --> 00:24:02,359
Speaker 2: journey a couple times, honestly, but there is great hope.

439
00:24:02,400 --> 00:24:05,199
Speaker 2: God is good and he wants us to live free

440
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:08,080
Speaker 2: because this is a distraction, Monica. I talked to so

441
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:10,720
Speaker 2: many women that have you told the Lord, Okay, well,

442
00:24:10,760 --> 00:24:13,000
Speaker 2: as soon as I lose x number of pounds, you know,

443
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,160
Speaker 2: then I'll leave the Sunday school class, or then we'll

444
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:17,840
Speaker 2: host small group, or you know, then I'll go on

445
00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:21,119
Speaker 2: that missions trip that I thought would be fun. And

446
00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:25,920
Speaker 2: they're waiting their entire lives to meet this body goal,

447
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:30,199
Speaker 2: and they're not doing the things that maybe God has

448
00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:34,600
Speaker 2: designed them uniquely purposed them to do. They pressed hold

449
00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:39,119
Speaker 2: on God's orders so they can get their body right first.

450
00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:42,240
Speaker 2: And please, if you're in that situation today, don't hear

451
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:44,119
Speaker 2: any shame or blame coming from me. I did the

452
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:48,200
Speaker 2: same thing. But my message is you don't have to

453
00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:51,120
Speaker 2: wait anymore. God's not waiting on you for that. He's

454
00:24:51,119 --> 00:24:52,960
Speaker 2: got something for you to do. And I have found,

455
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:55,840
Speaker 2: more so than any other thing, when we Christian women

456
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:59,440
Speaker 2: can really get after how He made us and what

457
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:02,800
Speaker 2: he made us to do, it changes our perspective on

458
00:25:02,840 --> 00:25:05,240
Speaker 2: our bodies. So I would say that I spent most

459
00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:06,960
Speaker 2: of my life believing that I should look more like

460
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,040
Speaker 2: a supermodel. That maybe that was part of my calling,

461
00:25:09,240 --> 00:25:12,000
Speaker 2: you know, to look more, and that was something God

462
00:25:12,040 --> 00:25:13,720
Speaker 2: wanted me to work on. You should look more like

463
00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:16,400
Speaker 2: a model. But the thing is, Monica, like, I'm five five.

464
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:17,440
Speaker 2: I used to say I was five to five and

465
00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:19,040
Speaker 2: a half. I don't know, I might have been stretching

466
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:21,760
Speaker 2: it a little bit. I'm fairly five five and I

467
00:25:21,840 --> 00:25:25,840
Speaker 2: have these short, stubby little fingers, and I've always had short,

468
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:28,639
Speaker 2: thick legs. I was never going to be a model,

469
00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:32,600
Speaker 2: And how ridiculous it was for me for decades to

470
00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:35,000
Speaker 2: think that I could get more like that. It's right there.

471
00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:37,600
Speaker 2: It was never gonna happen. But here's what I know

472
00:25:37,800 --> 00:25:41,240
Speaker 2: now at age fifty one, God gave me these short,

473
00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:44,439
Speaker 2: stubby fingers that are awesome at typing. I am a

474
00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:50,520
Speaker 2: super fast typist. I love to type. I can write

475
00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:52,080
Speaker 2: books pretty quickly because of it.

476
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:52,920
Speaker 1: That's awesome.

477
00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:55,480
Speaker 2: And that's what he had for me to do right.

478
00:25:56,040 --> 00:25:59,320
Speaker 2: It wasn't about looking good in pictures. The purpose he

479
00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:03,080
Speaker 2: has for my life is to type, is to write right.

480
00:26:03,119 --> 00:26:05,520
Speaker 2: And I think every one of your listeners, God didn't

481
00:26:05,520 --> 00:26:09,040
Speaker 2: miss you. He didn't skip you, Like, what's not an

482
00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:12,080
Speaker 2: accident that your body is shaped or built the way

483
00:26:12,119 --> 00:26:14,240
Speaker 2: it is. You didn't mess your body up. That's when

484
00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:16,320
Speaker 2: I hear a lot. I've got a podcast episode on that.

485
00:26:17,160 --> 00:26:20,520
Speaker 2: Nothing is not redeemable. If God can redeem you for eternity,

486
00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:23,440
Speaker 2: anything you've done to your body is redeemable, absolutely here

487
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:25,800
Speaker 2: on this earth. And He still has a purpose for you.

488
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:30,120
Speaker 2: And so don't be distracted by the lie. He's got

489
00:26:30,119 --> 00:26:31,000
Speaker 2: something for you to do.

490
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:33,760
Speaker 1: Find out what it is, you know that is so

491
00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:36,439
Speaker 1: amazing and filled with hope. I've got to take a break,

492
00:26:36,560 --> 00:26:38,840
Speaker 1: just for a quick moment, for a word from our sponsors,

493
00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:42,520
Speaker 1: and we'll be right back. Okay, Heather, you are sharing

494
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:46,280
Speaker 1: just how much hope is in front of every woman

495
00:26:46,400 --> 00:26:50,320
Speaker 1: that's listening. Because if we can identify it as a

496
00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:53,320
Speaker 1: sin issue, which it is, it is an idol. You

497
00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:57,120
Speaker 1: even mentioned the word counter cultural, and here's the thing.

498
00:26:57,480 --> 00:27:00,919
Speaker 1: For most of us Christian women, we do live a

499
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:04,480
Speaker 1: counter cultural life in many aspects, Like there are many

500
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 1: things that other women do that I, just as a Christian,

501
00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:13,520
Speaker 1: would not feel comfortable to do. But this one idol, right,

502
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:18,159
Speaker 1: this body image, Like I bowed to that without realizing

503
00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:20,119
Speaker 1: it because I want to fit in. I want it

504
00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:22,159
Speaker 1: whatever it is I think that I'm trying to do.

505
00:27:22,960 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 1: Like you, you know, I'm five'. THREE i wasn't ever

506
00:27:25,600 --> 00:27:28,320
Speaker 1: going to be a. SUPERMODEL i wasn't six feet tall

507
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:30,960
Speaker 1: and one hundred and ten. Pounds but those were the

508
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,919
Speaker 1: women in front of, me those were the women THAT i.

509
00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:36,520
Speaker 1: Saw you, know even my mom and my sister just

510
00:27:36,680 --> 00:27:39,840
Speaker 1: naturally thin, people and Praise god for. That that's how

511
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:43,120
Speaker 1: they were, wired, right that's that's How god put them.

512
00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:46,439
Speaker 1: Together for, me it was something. Different but to be

513
00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:49,239
Speaker 1: grateful for, that like you shared about the, typing Like

514
00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:53,320
Speaker 1: god put in you writing to help other, women that

515
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:56,600
Speaker 1: we could have this conversation today for women that are

516
00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:59,480
Speaker 1: struggling with this idol of body, image that are living

517
00:27:59,600 --> 00:28:03,120
Speaker 1: under the weight shame and guilt and just chasing one

518
00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:06,399
Speaker 1: diet after. ANOTHER i can think heather of days in

519
00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:08,640
Speaker 1: my life that at the end of the DAY i, thought,

520
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:11,080
Speaker 1: well this is a good day BECAUSE i didn't eat,

521
00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:13,560
Speaker 1: much and this was a bad day BECAUSE i ate

522
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:17,800
Speaker 1: a whole box of. Candy and it wasn't about Obeying

523
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:20,600
Speaker 1: god or reaching out to. Others it was WHAT i.

524
00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 1: Ate AND i, think how, ridiculous but how hopeful that

525
00:28:24,920 --> 00:28:27,560
Speaker 1: you talked about all of that can be remedied and

526
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:29,919
Speaker 1: restored because Of god's. Goodness.

527
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:32,399
Speaker 2: RIGHT i love that you said, That, monica that's actually

528
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:34,800
Speaker 2: in the. Book so when you get to, that when

529
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:37,439
Speaker 2: you get to that, line so THERE i. Am but

530
00:28:37,560 --> 00:28:40,720
Speaker 2: that was me, too laying in bed and recounting my,

531
00:28:40,800 --> 00:28:43,600
Speaker 2: sins which were about eating that THING i wasn't gonna,

532
00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:45,280
Speaker 2: eat or eating too much of that, thing or not

533
00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:47,720
Speaker 2: exercising as much AS i told myself was gonna, exercise,

534
00:28:47,840 --> 00:28:51,360
Speaker 2: Right so when it came to real, sin like The

535
00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:54,480
Speaker 2: god's actual, standards, YEAH i wasn't so worried about. THAT

536
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:57,720
Speaker 2: i was worried about THINGS i could do to manage

537
00:28:57,720 --> 00:29:00,560
Speaker 2: my body. Size and that was a big red for.

538
00:29:00,640 --> 00:29:02,760
Speaker 2: Me SO i don't say. THAT i, mean it's kind of,

539
00:29:02,800 --> 00:29:05,320
Speaker 2: funny BUT i really don't say that lightly BECAUSE i

540
00:29:05,320 --> 00:29:08,920
Speaker 2: think that's an experience that, many, many if not most women.

541
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:11,520
Speaker 1: Have Well i'm one hundred percent sure that it. Is

542
00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 1: and we laugh because it's, uncomfortable but there's truth in,

543
00:29:15,400 --> 00:29:18,240
Speaker 1: that and to just look at our lives and to

544
00:29:18,320 --> 00:29:21,640
Speaker 1: look at ourselves and, Say, OKAY i bought into this

545
00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:25,160
Speaker 1: thing thinking THAT i was doing the right, thing thinking

546
00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:27,640
Speaker 1: THAT i was doing the good. Thing so if it

547
00:29:27,680 --> 00:29:30,959
Speaker 1: was something, else like we would, know like if it

548
00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:34,720
Speaker 1: was a cigarette, smoking LIKE i would know right that

549
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:36,720
Speaker 1: IF i don't do, That but like IF i did,

550
00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:39,520
Speaker 1: that LIKE i would know probably not the healthiest thing to,

551
00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:44,600
Speaker 1: do not a good, Witness but dieting and, EXERCISING, boyd

552
00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:48,600
Speaker 1: that just seems like. Health that just seems so, good

553
00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:52,400
Speaker 1: and yet we can get caught up in. It and

554
00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:54,640
Speaker 1: like YOU i think WHEN i was in high, SCHOOL

555
00:29:54,760 --> 00:29:57,960
Speaker 1: i didn't have a, diagnosis LIKE i wasn't real, thin

556
00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:02,000
Speaker 1: so nobody THOUGHT i was. ANOREXIC i really wasn't doing

557
00:30:02,080 --> 00:30:06,320
Speaker 1: the bleaemia. Thing BUT i definitely would control my eating

558
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:09,280
Speaker 1: to the point THAT i didn't have a mensis that

559
00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:11,680
Speaker 1: SOMETIMES i would stand up and feel LIKE i was

560
00:30:11,720 --> 00:30:13,600
Speaker 1: going to pass out BECAUSE i hadn't had enough to.

561
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:18,400
Speaker 1: Eat and sad, enough people of me family members WHEN i, said,

562
00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:20,600
Speaker 1: Well i'm doing five hundred calories a, day they would

563
00:30:20,680 --> 00:30:23,320
Speaker 1: cheer not AND i look, back AND i, think no

564
00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:25,960
Speaker 1: one meant to hurt. ME i know that no one,

565
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:28,360
Speaker 1: meant but it's such a thing in our culture that

566
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:31,040
Speaker 1: they were excited to see me. Try AND i would

567
00:30:31,040 --> 00:30:33,240
Speaker 1: give it my, best AND i could do it for

568
00:30:33,320 --> 00:30:37,480
Speaker 1: about five, weeks and THEN i ate everything in, sight, right.

569
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:42,200
Speaker 2: Because that's how bodies, work, Right that's how bodies. Work

570
00:30:42,280 --> 00:30:45,360
Speaker 2: you have to refeed after, That AND i, mean it's

571
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:48,600
Speaker 2: really dangerous to think about the reality that most of

572
00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:53,040
Speaker 2: us were taught something like fifteen hundred calories a day

573
00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:56,600
Speaker 2: or twelve hundred calories a day or, less and do

574
00:30:56,640 --> 00:30:59,400
Speaker 2: you know you need Fifteen let me rephrase this do

575
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:02,040
Speaker 2: you know that a toddler needs fifteen hundred calories a

576
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:05,640
Speaker 2: day for, normal healthy brain. FUNCTIONS i did not know

577
00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:09,480
Speaker 2: that adult woman trying to live on less than fifteen

578
00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:13,080
Speaker 2: hundred calories a. Day something is, suffering and we get

579
00:31:13,120 --> 00:31:15,960
Speaker 2: an epidemic of. Anxiety and we do live in a stressful.

580
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:20,880
Speaker 2: World BUT i often, wonder you know eating brings you? Peace,

581
00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:25,240
Speaker 2: yes because AND i don't hear that in the wrong.

582
00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:28,680
Speaker 2: Way but the way our our bodies were designed is

583
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:33,040
Speaker 2: there's a calm that comes over your body when you feed,

584
00:31:33,080 --> 00:31:36,760
Speaker 2: it because bodies run on. Food and when you try

585
00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:38,840
Speaker 2: not to run your body on, food it runs on,

586
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:41,520
Speaker 2: cortisol which is a stress. Hormone we all know all

587
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:44,280
Speaker 2: about that From instagram, now, right and those are here

588
00:31:44,280 --> 00:31:48,480
Speaker 2: only two. Options otherwise the body stops, running Right and

589
00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:53,200
Speaker 2: so It god designed it beautifully and. Perfectly AND i

590
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,320
Speaker 2: think back to that false. Gospel, goodness, gracious we've let,

591
00:31:56,360 --> 00:32:01,320
Speaker 2: culture and even Some christian, culture to distort this in

592
00:32:01,360 --> 00:32:04,240
Speaker 2: such a way that we've made it into something it's.

593
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:07,440
Speaker 2: Not we praise those who can go to the birthday

594
00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:11,600
Speaker 2: party without eating as. Righteous and you, know please tell

595
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:15,080
Speaker 2: me your, secret O queen of. Restraint and what we

596
00:32:15,200 --> 00:32:18,360
Speaker 2: miss in that monica is a birthday, party for, example

597
00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:22,040
Speaker 2: that's the time to be, hospitable. Right it's a time

598
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:25,160
Speaker 2: of celebration and food is a very important part of our.

599
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:27,880
Speaker 2: Celebrations and so when we show up as the woman

600
00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:31,560
Speaker 2: who can't possibly eat, that are we being? Loving are

601
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:35,440
Speaker 2: we being? Hospitable. C. S lewis calls it the gluttony of. Delicacy.

602
00:32:35,840 --> 00:32:38,120
Speaker 2: Right we always think about gluttony as just like eating

603
00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:42,160
Speaker 2: too many, oreos but, No huttney's far more complex and

604
00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:45,440
Speaker 2: nuanced than, that And lewis called it the gluttony of.

605
00:32:45,440 --> 00:32:47,160
Speaker 2: Delicacy the woman who would be, like oh, NO i

606
00:32:47,160 --> 00:32:49,320
Speaker 2: couldn't possibly have any the tea is not the right,

607
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:53,239
Speaker 2: temperature on and on and on and you, know and

608
00:32:53,240 --> 00:32:56,960
Speaker 2: that was, however seventy eighty years Ago lewis would have

609
00:32:56,960 --> 00:33:00,520
Speaker 2: written exactly. Right and so it's really, TIME i, think

610
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:03,960
Speaker 2: For christian women to take this issue back, right, yes

611
00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:06,720
Speaker 2: to start seeing this in this actual biblical. Way and

612
00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:08,360
Speaker 2: that's what we try to do in The Forty Day.

613
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:11,240
Speaker 2: Workbook it's not A christian diet. Plan if you've got

614
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:13,160
Speaker 2: weight to lose and you want to lose, weight that's,

615
00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:14,920
Speaker 2: fine but that's not what this is. About this is

616
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:18,480
Speaker 2: about getting you on a path to where if you

617
00:33:18,520 --> 00:33:20,920
Speaker 2: do pursue those health, goals you don't make them an,

618
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:25,680
Speaker 2: idol and where you're able to keep first things first and,

619
00:33:25,840 --> 00:33:30,640
Speaker 2: actually you, know see what's truly, healthy which is, physical,

620
00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:33,239
Speaker 2: mental and spiritual, health all of it.

621
00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:36,480
Speaker 1: Together and you, Know, heather when you talked about the birthday,

622
00:33:36,520 --> 00:33:39,840
Speaker 1: parties you think about the research and the studies that

623
00:33:40,000 --> 00:33:43,960
Speaker 1: show that children in a family, situation when they have

624
00:33:44,120 --> 00:33:47,600
Speaker 1: family dinner, together doesn't matter whether it's a peanut butter

625
00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:51,400
Speaker 1: and jelly sandwich or just the most expensive, meal that

626
00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:54,320
Speaker 1: their mental health is, better their grades are, better because

627
00:33:54,360 --> 00:33:58,000
Speaker 1: there's something about coming together at the dinner. Table it's

628
00:33:58,040 --> 00:34:00,880
Speaker 1: true for our, children but it is true for us

629
00:34:00,960 --> 00:34:04,280
Speaker 1: as adults, Too so like for women who like, myself

630
00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:08,040
Speaker 1: are empty nesters, already it's something wonderful for my husband

631
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:11,200
Speaker 1: AND i to have a meal, together not that he's

632
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:15,480
Speaker 1: having his thing And i'm having my little two tablespoons of,

633
00:34:15,560 --> 00:34:18,279
Speaker 1: food you, know my little nine hundred calories a day,

634
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:22,239
Speaker 1: thing because that makes him feel, uncomfortable and it's it's

635
00:34:22,280 --> 00:34:25,680
Speaker 1: not comfortable, physically nine hundred calories a. Day it's REALLY

636
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:28,760
Speaker 1: i get hungry after a. While i've tried that, many many.

637
00:34:28,840 --> 00:34:32,840
Speaker 1: Times BUT i think of my mental, health my ability

638
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:36,239
Speaker 1: to enjoy. DINNER i think of all the women that

639
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:39,080
Speaker 1: are listening to be able to go to their children

640
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:44,359
Speaker 1: or teenagers birthday, gatherings family gatherings and actually eat and

641
00:34:44,480 --> 00:34:47,560
Speaker 1: be kind to people and listen to people and. LAUGH i,

642
00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:51,759
Speaker 1: mean just, right just be. People and we're missing that

643
00:34:52,239 --> 00:34:53,360
Speaker 1: because of this. Idol.

644
00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:56,440
Speaker 2: RIGHT i love it you said be kind BECAUSE i

645
00:34:56,480 --> 00:34:58,680
Speaker 2: was going to poke a little bit around that. ONE i,

646
00:34:58,719 --> 00:35:00,960
Speaker 2: MEAN i was not a very nice life WHEN i was.

647
00:35:01,040 --> 00:35:03,360
Speaker 2: DIETING i was not very loving to my. HUSBAND i

648
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:06,319
Speaker 2: was hungry and mad all the. Time and then of

649
00:35:06,360 --> 00:35:08,200
Speaker 2: COURSE i had little, kids you, know AND i had

650
00:35:08,239 --> 00:35:10,000
Speaker 2: my special food and the little kids would eat the

651
00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:11,640
Speaker 2: special food And i'd be, like do you know how

652
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:14,600
Speaker 2: much those bars? Are you ate the last? Bar, now

653
00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:17,120
Speaker 2: mommy has nothing to, eat you. KNOW i, mean it

654
00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:20,080
Speaker 2: was a whole, thing and it was Not it was

655
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:26,000
Speaker 2: not a, finder gentler. Heathery it was a much, meaner

656
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:28,640
Speaker 2: venomous heather.

657
00:35:29,520 --> 00:35:32,680
Speaker 1: And hunger will do that to. YOU i remember having

658
00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:36,800
Speaker 1: like A monica meltdown because my husband ate the last

659
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:40,080
Speaker 1: skinny cow ice, cream AND i was totally. Serious i'm,

660
00:35:40,120 --> 00:35:42,600
Speaker 1: like but you have other kinds of ice cream in

661
00:35:42,640 --> 00:35:45,319
Speaker 1: there that you can, eat BUT i only have the skinny, Cat,

662
00:35:45,400 --> 00:35:49,040
Speaker 1: like oh poor. Me AND i just thought, afterward how

663
00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:52,640
Speaker 1: ridiculous can a grown woman? Be monica, smelter, like is

664
00:35:52,680 --> 00:35:55,560
Speaker 1: this not? Stupid but you know, WHAT i was. Hungry

665
00:35:55,719 --> 00:35:57,880
Speaker 1: it had gone on for a prolonged period of. Time

666
00:35:58,160 --> 00:36:01,200
Speaker 1: i'm trying to work off every cow and more THAT i,

667
00:36:01,280 --> 00:36:05,359
Speaker 1: consume and apparently that skinny cow just meant the world to.

668
00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:09,200
Speaker 2: ME i am right there with. You but you know

669
00:36:09,440 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 2: you mentioned our. CHILDREN i was just thinking, about, Well

670
00:36:13,719 --> 00:36:16,719
Speaker 2: i'm remembering the TIME i was teaching a. CLASS i

671
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:18,600
Speaker 2: homeschooled my kids and we had a co op AND

672
00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:20,840
Speaker 2: i was teaching a homeschool class and one of the

673
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:23,960
Speaker 2: little girls shared a presentation about this wonderful dinner their

674
00:36:23,960 --> 00:36:26,719
Speaker 2: family had, had and a little boy raised his hand

675
00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:28,759
Speaker 2: at the end and he, said did your mom eat

676
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:30,600
Speaker 2: that dinner with? You or was she on a? Diet

677
00:36:31,640 --> 00:36:34,319
Speaker 2: AND i was, like, there it is right. There that's.

678
00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:38,760
Speaker 2: It mom can't eat with the family if she's preparing

679
00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:41,359
Speaker 2: her own special. Dinner while the fan she prepares family,

680
00:36:41,400 --> 00:36:43,480
Speaker 2: dinner then prepares their own special. Terenes but the thing

681
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:45,680
Speaker 2: that a lot of people push back on me With monica,

682
00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:48,200
Speaker 2: is BUT i want to be. HEALTHIER i want to live.

683
00:36:48,239 --> 00:36:49,920
Speaker 2: LONG i want to live long to see my, grandchildren

684
00:36:49,960 --> 00:36:51,160
Speaker 2: want to be able to play with my. GRANDCHILDREN i,

685
00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:53,560
Speaker 2: MEAN i have the health And longevity conversation seven or

686
00:36:53,600 --> 00:36:57,160
Speaker 2: eight times a. Day but here's the. Reality if you

687
00:36:57,239 --> 00:36:59,720
Speaker 2: look AT i think it's The National stage Of health

688
00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:02,719
Speaker 2: as a. Studier actually it might even be a global health.

689
00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:06,560
Speaker 2: Organization but there's a study Called it's like all of

690
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:09,239
Speaker 2: the metrics of, health, Right and when you look at,

691
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:12,600
Speaker 2: that it's the word Is. God it's like the eight.

692
00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:16,200
Speaker 2: DETERMINANTS i think it's the eight determinants of, health, Right

693
00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:18,560
Speaker 2: only two of them are food and. Exercise and if

694
00:37:18,560 --> 00:37:21,000
Speaker 2: you think about it like a pie, chart those livers

695
00:37:21,000 --> 00:37:24,400
Speaker 2: are actually pretty. Small but there's a lot of great

696
00:37:24,480 --> 00:37:29,759
Speaker 2: data coming out Of harvard around relationships and. Community and you,

697
00:37:29,760 --> 00:37:32,560
Speaker 2: know what actually makes you live a long time is

698
00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:35,680
Speaker 2: having strong relationships not just inside your family but outside your,

699
00:37:35,680 --> 00:37:40,319
Speaker 2: family and having a stronger wider. Community. Right AND i

700
00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:42,680
Speaker 2: think about these women that are just like, you AND

701
00:37:42,719 --> 00:37:45,520
Speaker 2: i that are on a, diet and so they don't

702
00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:47,759
Speaker 2: go out to dinner with, people or if they get

703
00:37:47,760 --> 00:37:50,800
Speaker 2: invited over to someone's home for, dinner they're not going to,

704
00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:52,239
Speaker 2: go or they're going to show up with their own

705
00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:55,839
Speaker 2: cooler of. Food, Right like we miss out on community

706
00:37:55,920 --> 00:37:59,360
Speaker 2: inside and outside of our homes when we are so

707
00:37:59,520 --> 00:38:01,239
Speaker 2: obsessed with food and.

708
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:04,560
Speaker 1: Body, yeah and it's it's isolating because even if you

709
00:38:04,600 --> 00:38:06,719
Speaker 1: go to the, event you've got your own, things so

710
00:38:06,760 --> 00:38:10,000
Speaker 1: you've got to stay. Separated and if it's to go

711
00:38:10,040 --> 00:38:13,120
Speaker 1: out to, eat we all, know, right it's harder to

712
00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:16,920
Speaker 1: have choices that you can really eat because everything is

713
00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:19,880
Speaker 1: so restrained and it's this and it's that's. Who it's not.

714
00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:22,880
Speaker 1: Enjoyable SO i think for me during that period of,

715
00:38:22,920 --> 00:38:24,919
Speaker 1: time when my husband said let's go out to, eat

716
00:38:24,920 --> 00:38:27,359
Speaker 1: which normally would have been a fun time for, ME

717
00:38:27,440 --> 00:38:29,360
Speaker 1: i was, like you, Know i'd rather just stay, home

718
00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:32,000
Speaker 1: right so THAT i can hard cook this, egg because

719
00:38:32,239 --> 00:38:34,600
Speaker 1: a hard cooked egg is a beautiful. DINNER i, Mean,

720
00:38:35,040 --> 00:38:39,040
Speaker 1: monica is that? Enough? Oh, Yes it's just the things

721
00:38:39,120 --> 00:38:43,640
Speaker 1: that we're doing to try to win, approval to try

722
00:38:43,640 --> 00:38:46,520
Speaker 1: to look like what this culture says we can look,

723
00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:50,960
Speaker 1: like and, really as, women we can't do all of those.

724
00:38:51,040 --> 00:38:53,440
Speaker 1: Things and, also Please, god.

725
00:38:54,080 --> 00:38:56,200
Speaker 2: Well let me say that in a different. Way, right

726
00:38:56,600 --> 00:38:58,319
Speaker 2: we do all this because we want to know we're,

727
00:38:58,360 --> 00:39:01,440
Speaker 2: okay we want to know where, double we want to

728
00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:03,359
Speaker 2: know we're. Worthy and we're still trying to prove that

729
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:07,719
Speaker 2: that The gospel already proved. It, like so we either

730
00:39:07,760 --> 00:39:10,160
Speaker 2: believe it or we. Don't we either believe What jesus

731
00:39:10,160 --> 00:39:12,520
Speaker 2: did was enough or we. Don't and if we can

732
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:15,000
Speaker 2: believe that What jesus did was, enough then we should

733
00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:17,560
Speaker 2: be able to loosen the. Grip, RIGHT i don't have

734
00:39:17,640 --> 00:39:21,280
Speaker 2: to prove anything. Anymore and, again LIKE i don't abuse, Grace,

735
00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:24,359
Speaker 2: Right i'm a good steward of my. Body but that

736
00:39:24,400 --> 00:39:28,480
Speaker 2: doesn't look like. Obsession that doesn't look like nine hundred

737
00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:31,560
Speaker 2: calories a, Day that doesn't look like the most important

738
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:33,480
Speaker 2: thing of my day is WHAT i ate and HOW

739
00:39:33,520 --> 00:39:36,400
Speaker 2: i ate and whether or not. Exercised, right that it

740
00:39:36,440 --> 00:39:41,359
Speaker 2: looks very. Different and so it really does come down

741
00:39:41,400 --> 00:39:45,400
Speaker 2: to what do you? Believe and again we might have

742
00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:48,239
Speaker 2: the Right god In jesus, answer but how AM i?

743
00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:50,400
Speaker 2: Living AM i living as IF i believe WHAT i?

744
00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:54,080
Speaker 2: Believe or AM i really chasing value and worth and

745
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:57,239
Speaker 2: believing what the idol tells me that that value and

746
00:39:57,239 --> 00:39:59,879
Speaker 2: worth is going to come on me like, this shall

747
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:02,680
Speaker 2: we're of fairy dust as soon AS i hit that

748
00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:05,840
Speaker 2: number on the scale or get the right surgery or

749
00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:08,840
Speaker 2: whatever it may. Be and as you have, experienced and

750
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:12,160
Speaker 2: As i've, experienced that's just never going to. Happen it just.

751
00:40:12,200 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 2: Doesn't it's.

752
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:16,680
Speaker 1: Not and this is such an important, conversation even on

753
00:40:16,719 --> 00:40:19,120
Speaker 1: hope of the journey this, month as we're looking at you,

754
00:40:19,160 --> 00:40:23,040
Speaker 1: know letting go to live. Free what you're talking about

755
00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:26,919
Speaker 1: is living. Free it's making peace with our bodies and being,

756
00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:29,400
Speaker 1: free which is What christ already made, us and not

757
00:40:29,560 --> 00:40:34,759
Speaker 1: having to continually strive for anybody's accolades or just to Be,

758
00:40:34,960 --> 00:40:38,200
Speaker 1: okay as you, said so we're almost out of. Time

759
00:40:38,320 --> 00:40:40,080
Speaker 1: is there one last thing that you might want to

760
00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:41,120
Speaker 1: leave us with, Today?

761
00:40:41,320 --> 00:40:43,880
Speaker 2: Heather so if you're looking for just something super practical

762
00:40:43,920 --> 00:40:46,680
Speaker 2: and super, actionable, right that's what we're all looking. For

763
00:40:47,120 --> 00:40:49,160
Speaker 2: here's WHAT i wanted to do this, week and it's

764
00:40:49,200 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 2: going to be, Hard, Okay i'm not giving it a softball.

765
00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:56,320
Speaker 2: HERE i want you to start listening to the things

766
00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:58,880
Speaker 2: that you say to, yourself those things you hear in

767
00:40:58,920 --> 00:41:02,279
Speaker 2: your head as you, listen as you. Observe just ask,

768
00:41:02,360 --> 00:41:05,160
Speaker 2: yourself who's saying that to? Me AND i know you're

769
00:41:05,160 --> 00:41:06,759
Speaker 2: gonna want to be, like what's me saying that to?

770
00:41:06,840 --> 00:41:11,520
Speaker 2: Me we could, argue, right but you do have a

771
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:14,840
Speaker 2: very real, enemy and he's the one who wants you

772
00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:18,000
Speaker 2: to stay stuck in this more than anyone. Else, right

773
00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:21,160
Speaker 2: because you stay ineffective as long as your thoughts are

774
00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:25,920
Speaker 2: consumed with thinness or weight loss or. Health however you

775
00:41:25,960 --> 00:41:28,160
Speaker 2: want to call it, right if your thoughts are consumed

776
00:41:28,200 --> 00:41:31,680
Speaker 2: about those things instead of the things Of god and

777
00:41:31,719 --> 00:41:35,000
Speaker 2: the things of his, word he has one Right and

778
00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:37,040
Speaker 2: my Forty Day Body igoric, BOOK i have a line

779
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 2: about like the devil doesn't have to work too hard around.

780
00:41:39,560 --> 00:41:40,920
Speaker 2: Me he just has to put a box of thin

781
00:41:40,960 --> 00:41:44,120
Speaker 2: mints in front of me And i'm gone for a? Week? Right? Yes?

782
00:41:44,320 --> 00:41:46,000
Speaker 2: Yeah SHOULD i eat? Them SHOULD i not eat? Them? Oh?

783
00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:46,440
Speaker 1: NO i eat?

784
00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:47,839
Speaker 2: Them oh? No what DO i do about the fact

785
00:41:47,840 --> 00:41:49,400
Speaker 2: THAT i eat? Them how CAN i make? Up SHOULD

786
00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:51,239
Speaker 2: i get another box and eat them While i'm off the?

787
00:41:51,239 --> 00:41:54,040
Speaker 2: WAGON i mean one box of thin? Mints and he

788
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:56,759
Speaker 2: derails me For kingdom purpose for at least a. Week

789
00:41:57,040 --> 00:41:57,840
Speaker 2: we shouldn't make it that.

790
00:41:57,920 --> 00:42:01,799
Speaker 1: Easy no, Right, no have to recognize it and call

791
00:42:01,880 --> 00:42:03,879
Speaker 1: it for what it. Is it's an idle. Issue it's

792
00:42:03,880 --> 00:42:07,000
Speaker 1: a sin, issue and the only remedy Is jesus, right

793
00:42:07,040 --> 00:42:10,120
Speaker 1: and just repenting of that and being willing to walk

794
00:42:10,160 --> 00:42:12,719
Speaker 1: away from. It AND i think that your forty day,

795
00:42:12,800 --> 00:42:15,400
Speaker 1: Challenge i'm all in BECAUSE i know that it's going

796
00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:18,240
Speaker 1: to be a, process BUT i WANT i won't. EVER

797
00:42:18,640 --> 00:42:21,440
Speaker 1: i can't improve anything UNLESS i get, started SO i

798
00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:23,399
Speaker 1: want to do. That so thank you so Much heather

799
00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:26,560
Speaker 1: for joining me today and for everybody who's. Listening if

800
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:28,520
Speaker 1: you look in the show notes all the links To

801
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:32,000
Speaker 1: heather's books for information the forty Day, challenge all of

802
00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:35,040
Speaker 1: those goodies will be there for. You because hope for

803
00:42:35,120 --> 00:42:38,520
Speaker 1: the journey is about finding freedom In. Christ it is

804
00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:42,880
Speaker 1: about really laying down whatever separates as From him and

805
00:42:43,040 --> 00:42:46,360
Speaker 1: just Making him, first Loving, him Loving, god loving. People

806
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:48,600
Speaker 1: so we're out of time for, today BUT i will

807
00:42:48,880 --> 00:42:51,400
Speaker 1: see you again next week with more hope for the.

808
00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:51,920
Speaker 2: Journey