1 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:03,520 Speaker 1: Life Audio. 2 00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:08,520 Speaker 2: Welcome to the Love Offering Podcast. I'm your host, Rachel Adam's, 3 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:11,200 Speaker 2: author of everyday Prayers for Love, Learning to Love God, others, 4 00:00:11,240 --> 00:00:14,440 Speaker 2: and even yourself. Each week we dive into meaningful conversations 5 00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:16,919 Speaker 2: about how to live out the greatest commandment, loving God 6 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:18,880 Speaker 2: with all of our heart's soul, mind and strength, and 7 00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:22,480 Speaker 2: loving our neighbors as ourselves. Through inspiring stories, practical wisdom, 8 00:00:22,520 --> 00:00:24,599 Speaker 2: or biblical truth. My hope is to encourage you to 9 00:00:24,720 --> 00:00:27,480 Speaker 2: love boldly, live faithfully, and reflect God's love in your 10 00:00:27,480 --> 00:00:30,680 Speaker 2: everyday life. Today, I'm honored to welcome Nicole J. Suvar 11 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:33,160 Speaker 2: to the show. Nicole is the author of I Don't 12 00:00:33,159 --> 00:00:35,760 Speaker 2: Have to Hold It All Together, Cultivating the Peace of Eden. 13 00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:38,479 Speaker 2: When feeling overwhelmed in a world where so many of 14 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:41,200 Speaker 2: us build the pressure to keep everything together, Nicole offers 15 00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:44,159 Speaker 2: a gentle and freeing invitation to return to God's original 16 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:46,880 Speaker 2: design for peace. Drawing from the story of the Garden 17 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:50,320 Speaker 2: of Eden, her personal journey with anxiety, and practical faith 18 00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:53,000 Speaker 2: filled wisdom, she helps us recognize the ways that we've 19 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:55,760 Speaker 2: tried to create our own version of peace and points 20 00:00:55,840 --> 00:01:00,760 Speaker 2: us back to the true peace that only God can provide. Nicole, 21 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:03,120 Speaker 2: and welcome back to the Love Offering Podcast. I'm so 22 00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:04,800 Speaker 2: happy to have you again, Rachel. 23 00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:06,319 Speaker 1: It's so good to be here and to see you. 24 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:10,120 Speaker 2: So I have to be honest as we start. I 25 00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:13,080 Speaker 2: got to read an early advanced reader copy of this 26 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:15,440 Speaker 2: book and got to endorse it and all the things, 27 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:19,400 Speaker 2: and I guess I didn't realize how much I struggled 28 00:01:19,440 --> 00:01:21,600 Speaker 2: with everything we're going to get ready to talk about 29 00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:24,360 Speaker 2: until I read your book. And I'm laughing about it now, 30 00:01:24,440 --> 00:01:28,320 Speaker 2: but it truly was eye opening, and I can confidently 31 00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:30,080 Speaker 2: say your book helped me. 32 00:01:31,240 --> 00:01:32,959 Speaker 3: It is a really. 33 00:01:33,319 --> 00:01:36,800 Speaker 2: Great resource that I highly highly recommend, and so I'm 34 00:01:36,840 --> 00:01:38,920 Speaker 2: honored to get to talk with you today and to 35 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:41,360 Speaker 2: share about it in this message, because I really do 36 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:43,119 Speaker 2: believe it's going to help so many people. 37 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:47,120 Speaker 1: Oh that warms my heart so much, Rachel, to hear that. 38 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:50,160 Speaker 3: Thank you well. I know this is hard fought wisdom 39 00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:50,600 Speaker 3: for you. 40 00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:52,920 Speaker 2: And so as we begin, for those that don't know 41 00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:55,760 Speaker 2: your story, you do openly share about your own experience 42 00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:58,520 Speaker 2: with undiagnosed anxiety for many years. So how did that 43 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:01,120 Speaker 2: journey shape you're under standing of peace in the ways 44 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:03,560 Speaker 2: that we often try to manufacture it ourselves. Talk to 45 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 2: us about this anxiety that you have been failing for 46 00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:07,600 Speaker 2: so many years. 47 00:02:08,040 --> 00:02:11,880 Speaker 4: Yes, my first memories of anxiety go back to memories 48 00:02:11,919 --> 00:02:15,040 Speaker 4: of panic attacks, like in third grade, but I did 49 00:02:15,040 --> 00:02:16,519 Speaker 4: not know what those were. I did not have a 50 00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:19,680 Speaker 4: language to give them other that I was just really 51 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:22,959 Speaker 4: worried about things. So I would go to my teacher 52 00:02:23,040 --> 00:02:26,080 Speaker 4: with all of these different worry things and it's not 53 00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:29,320 Speaker 4: that big a deal, just calm down, forget about it, 54 00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:31,600 Speaker 4: don't worry about it, like all of those lines. And 55 00:02:31,639 --> 00:02:34,239 Speaker 4: then it would carry to home, where I would wake 56 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,600 Speaker 4: up in the middle of the night and come downstairs 57 00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:39,040 Speaker 4: with all of these again, these worries is what I 58 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:41,000 Speaker 4: was calling them, and I would you tell my parents 59 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:43,280 Speaker 4: and the same things, don't worry about it, It's not 60 00:02:43,280 --> 00:02:45,800 Speaker 4: that big deal, go back to bed. And so for 61 00:02:45,919 --> 00:02:48,919 Speaker 4: years I just thought it was I just worried a lot. 62 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:51,040 Speaker 4: It was kind of became a family joke that I 63 00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:52,840 Speaker 4: was the worry wart. No one else had to worry 64 00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,639 Speaker 4: about it because I would do it for him and 65 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:58,160 Speaker 4: continually being told don't worry about it, and I was 66 00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:00,680 Speaker 4: trying to not worry about it. I couldn't past that, 67 00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:03,360 Speaker 4: so I started believing that there was something wrong with me, 68 00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:07,040 Speaker 4: because clearly everybody else I thought they all operated at 69 00:03:07,040 --> 00:03:08,840 Speaker 4: this high of a level of worry, but they were 70 00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:11,840 Speaker 4: able to manage and shut it off that I just 71 00:03:11,919 --> 00:03:15,040 Speaker 4: could not. And as like, as I grew older, I 72 00:03:15,120 --> 00:03:18,040 Speaker 4: became a Christian in high school, and then the language changed, 73 00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:20,920 Speaker 4: because you know, now as a christ follower, you've got 74 00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:24,079 Speaker 4: you bring that in well, you shouldn't be worried about things, 75 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,639 Speaker 4: you shouldn't be anxious, cast all your anxiety on him. 76 00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:29,240 Speaker 4: And so it was it was more of like I said, 77 00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:30,920 Speaker 4: I just don't worry about it. It was like, have you 78 00:03:30,919 --> 00:03:33,720 Speaker 4: prayed about it enough? Have you read your Bible? And 79 00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:36,320 Speaker 4: so I started getting the language and believing that I 80 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:38,080 Speaker 4: wasn't a good enough Christian because. 81 00:03:37,840 --> 00:03:40,000 Speaker 1: Again I could not shut this down. 82 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:43,080 Speaker 4: And eventually, because I kept being told that and it 83 00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:46,080 Speaker 4: wasn't helpful at all, I just quit telling people. 84 00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 1: And so I just would shove it down deeper and deeper. 85 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:51,360 Speaker 4: So whenever this anxiety would call up my throat, I 86 00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:53,920 Speaker 4: would shove it down, and I would find ways to 87 00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:57,040 Speaker 4: control my environment to make myself feel better. 88 00:03:57,720 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 1: The life became a lot about control, and. 89 00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:03,560 Speaker 4: A whole lot less about like really getting to the 90 00:04:03,640 --> 00:04:06,400 Speaker 4: root of what the issue was. And it wasn't until 91 00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:09,160 Speaker 4: I was in my mid thirties. It was actually suicidal 92 00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:13,240 Speaker 4: and I had a friend recommend I call a hotline. 93 00:04:13,280 --> 00:04:17,320 Speaker 4: There's a Christian based mental health hotline that I called, 94 00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:20,680 Speaker 4: and that was the first time I had someone say 95 00:04:20,880 --> 00:04:24,880 Speaker 4: it sounds like you have anxiety and I was like, what, No, 96 00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:28,240 Speaker 4: that's like I worked with people that were like in 97 00:04:28,279 --> 00:04:30,279 Speaker 4: the social services field, so I had heard the language. 98 00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:32,640 Speaker 1: I'm like, no, those are people that like, that's not me. 99 00:04:33,160 --> 00:04:35,799 Speaker 4: But when they started describing and realizing like, oh, okay, 100 00:04:35,839 --> 00:04:39,040 Speaker 4: so everybody doesn't live like this at this high level 101 00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:41,840 Speaker 4: of anxiety. And so when I got they recommend I 102 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:43,599 Speaker 4: go to a doctor, I see a counselor. I started 103 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:46,760 Speaker 4: going through those things, got diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder 104 00:04:46,839 --> 00:04:50,320 Speaker 4: and major depression, and that got me started on the 105 00:04:50,400 --> 00:04:54,000 Speaker 4: road to healing, just working with my Christian based counselor 106 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,800 Speaker 4: and starting to see this struggle that I have from 107 00:04:57,800 --> 00:05:00,280 Speaker 4: a different perspective, the fact that I did not have 108 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:02,719 Speaker 4: to figure all this stuff out before coming to Jesus, 109 00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:05,320 Speaker 4: because they think there's that shame that like I shouldn't 110 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:06,800 Speaker 4: be worried about this. I need to get this whole 111 00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:10,000 Speaker 4: Christian thing figured out before I'm really going to be effective. 112 00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:13,320 Speaker 4: And it's kingdom, even because I'm clearly not doing a 113 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:13,800 Speaker 4: good job. 114 00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:17,719 Speaker 2: I think before we go even any further, I'm just 115 00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:21,680 Speaker 2: mindful of maybe there's somebody listening that is just nodding 116 00:05:21,760 --> 00:05:24,760 Speaker 2: their head and understanding of everything that you've just said, 117 00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:28,520 Speaker 2: and they're experiencing many of the same feelings. What's the 118 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:31,760 Speaker 2: Christian hotline that they should call. I'm want to go 119 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:34,520 Speaker 2: ahead and give that information, and then also just to 120 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:37,560 Speaker 2: tell them be open about it. And if people if 121 00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:39,159 Speaker 2: you are trying to be open about it and they're like, 122 00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:41,279 Speaker 2: just pray about it and it's no big dealquitch, just quit, 123 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:44,200 Speaker 2: you know, like we hear you and you need to 124 00:05:44,240 --> 00:05:47,560 Speaker 2: go seek professional help, and that's okay. So can you 125 00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:50,240 Speaker 2: kind of give that back caveat and that information here 126 00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:50,640 Speaker 2: from that? 127 00:05:50,760 --> 00:05:54,240 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, first or foremost, the national hot line 128 00:05:54,279 --> 00:05:57,400 Speaker 4: like suicide hot line is nine to eight eight, like 129 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,680 Speaker 4: at any point anywhere you can dial that and get 130 00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,200 Speaker 4: to some one who will talk you through things. 131 00:06:02,400 --> 00:06:03,279 Speaker 1: There's another one. 132 00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:05,760 Speaker 4: That's that's actually local here, but it's National and you 133 00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:09,200 Speaker 4: can text them and it's called Remedy Live and that 134 00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:11,360 Speaker 4: is the one that I had started with. And there, 135 00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:13,919 Speaker 4: even though they're Christian base, they will talk with anyone 136 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:16,360 Speaker 4: who is like they'll kind of meet them where they're 137 00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:18,680 Speaker 4: at and the kind of language that they're using. I 138 00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:21,760 Speaker 4: can give you the actual number after the show. You 139 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:23,280 Speaker 4: can maybe put in the show notes. 140 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,320 Speaker 3: Or absolutely, yeah, let's do that. 141 00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:25,680 Speaker 1: Well. 142 00:06:25,720 --> 00:06:28,960 Speaker 2: I can't wait to continue today's conversation. It's an important one, 143 00:06:29,279 --> 00:06:30,960 Speaker 2: but we're going to take a brief break to hear 144 00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:32,800 Speaker 2: a word from today's sponsor, and when we come back, 145 00:06:32,880 --> 00:06:35,120 Speaker 2: we'll talk about how our modern struggles with anxiety and 146 00:06:35,160 --> 00:06:41,600 Speaker 2: overwhelm connect to this deeper search for peace. Welcome back. 147 00:06:41,640 --> 00:06:44,479 Speaker 2: I'm talking with Nicole J. Suvar about her book I 148 00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:47,320 Speaker 2: Don't have to hold it all together. Even just that title, 149 00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:50,240 Speaker 2: I feel like is like an exhale, like thank you 150 00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:52,440 Speaker 2: for the permission I let go. 151 00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:54,320 Speaker 3: Isn't that so silly? 152 00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:54,840 Speaker 2: But it is. 153 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:56,719 Speaker 3: It's a sigh of really absolutely. 154 00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:58,520 Speaker 4: I don't know how many people have said that to 155 00:06:58,640 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 4: me after, like, just hear that, because I think so 156 00:07:01,200 --> 00:07:04,040 Speaker 4: much of us have that inner dialogue that's going in 157 00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:04,560 Speaker 4: our brain. 158 00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:05,840 Speaker 1: Like I have to get it together. I have to 159 00:07:05,880 --> 00:07:06,520 Speaker 1: hold it together. 160 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:08,560 Speaker 4: Like and so to have someone like you know, hold 161 00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:10,640 Speaker 4: your hands like either side of your face right here 162 00:07:10,640 --> 00:07:12,680 Speaker 4: and be like, hey, you don't have to hold it 163 00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:16,440 Speaker 4: all together like that relief like okay, I don't. 164 00:07:17,040 --> 00:07:19,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, Like I just feel like, like I wrote, like 165 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:22,080 Speaker 2: an exhale, like okay, Like it's almost a mantra we 166 00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:25,440 Speaker 2: need to repeat every single day. I don't have to, 167 00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:28,560 Speaker 2: because God is God is, God is in control. He's 168 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:29,520 Speaker 2: holding it all together. 169 00:07:29,560 --> 00:07:30,320 Speaker 3: We onw yes. 170 00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:33,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, just such an illusion of control to begin with, 171 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:35,480 Speaker 2: but as we begin, we're going to get to that. 172 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:38,920 Speaker 2: So your book, it begins with the image of the 173 00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:41,600 Speaker 2: garden of Eden, a place of perfect peace and COMMUNI 174 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:44,280 Speaker 2: with God. I love just this connection. The way that 175 00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:46,160 Speaker 2: you frame this whole book is just so beautiful. So 176 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,520 Speaker 2: talk to us about what first drew you to this 177 00:07:48,640 --> 00:07:50,560 Speaker 2: theme and how I shaped the message of your book. 178 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,120 Speaker 3: This is the garden. Yeah. 179 00:07:52,320 --> 00:07:55,640 Speaker 4: I have thought about Eden for many years just because 180 00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:59,360 Speaker 4: of it's the perfection and being a perfectionist, just loving 181 00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:01,520 Speaker 4: the idea of going back to a place where like 182 00:08:01,800 --> 00:08:06,400 Speaker 4: everything is where it should be and working as it should. Yeah, 183 00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:10,640 Speaker 4: and whenever I would come up to something in life, 184 00:08:10,680 --> 00:08:14,200 Speaker 4: I'd bump up against something that just felt hard, but 185 00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:16,360 Speaker 4: yet parts of it felt like God was in it. 186 00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:19,080 Speaker 4: And I'm like, I know that we're outside of Eden, 187 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:22,320 Speaker 4: we are exiled, and so we're not really home. So 188 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,880 Speaker 4: what about this thing that I'm struggling against? What part 189 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:29,560 Speaker 4: of it actually is something from Eden? What originated from there? 190 00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:32,600 Speaker 4: But the Fall has twisted things and made things difficult. 191 00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:34,760 Speaker 4: Because then if I can think through something like that, 192 00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:37,520 Speaker 4: I can focus on that part that takes us all 193 00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:39,120 Speaker 4: the way back to eating, because that's the part that 194 00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:43,240 Speaker 4: connects with God. And so I thought about seven different 195 00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:47,640 Speaker 4: attributes of Eden that were present then, and even though 196 00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:50,400 Speaker 4: the Fall has happened and we're living in exile, those 197 00:08:50,440 --> 00:08:54,440 Speaker 4: things are still present here today for us to access 198 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:58,160 Speaker 4: God's presence, his peace, to just connect. 199 00:08:57,760 --> 00:08:58,679 Speaker 1: With him more. 200 00:09:00,120 --> 00:09:01,880 Speaker 2: So we're going to get into all this, but to 201 00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:04,440 Speaker 2: give us the seven word. Are the seven that we're 202 00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:05,280 Speaker 2: going to walk through today. 203 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:08,440 Speaker 1: The very first is communion with God. 204 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:12,200 Speaker 4: Like none of these other attributes will be sustainable or 205 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:15,160 Speaker 4: go as deep if we do not first have that 206 00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:19,040 Speaker 4: deep relationship communion with God, not just a you know, 207 00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:22,000 Speaker 4: God loves me, He is my savior. I've got the 208 00:09:22,040 --> 00:09:24,040 Speaker 4: rest of this, but know the fact that you are 209 00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:28,280 Speaker 4: deeply rooted and connected to the vine, so first and 210 00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:32,040 Speaker 4: foremost commune with God. And then we have the outdoors 211 00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:34,720 Speaker 4: and just creation itself and how God has created that 212 00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:37,959 Speaker 4: to sustain human life and all of life, and how 213 00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:41,160 Speaker 4: it all it does all work together. And then we 214 00:09:41,240 --> 00:09:44,959 Speaker 4: have belonging. How we were not designed to be alone. 215 00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:47,560 Speaker 4: Isolation is not the way that humans are to live. 216 00:09:47,640 --> 00:09:50,320 Speaker 4: We are created to be together and to belong to 217 00:09:50,360 --> 00:09:53,840 Speaker 4: each other. And another one is rest, like even before 218 00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:58,280 Speaker 4: the fall came, like God rested as an example, it 219 00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:01,680 Speaker 4: was something that's built into our body. Because rest, when 220 00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:04,680 Speaker 4: we rest, we communicate that we trust God to be 221 00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:07,520 Speaker 4: the provider because we stopped producing and we look to 222 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:10,000 Speaker 4: him to be the one to carry us. And purpose 223 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:14,319 Speaker 4: is another one. All humans were given jobs and work 224 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:18,079 Speaker 4: to do before the fall happened. Hard work, the sweat 225 00:10:18,120 --> 00:10:20,880 Speaker 4: of the brow that that parton came afterwards. But the 226 00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:23,800 Speaker 4: fact that we were all implanted in this part, that 227 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:26,440 Speaker 4: we wanted to have a purpose like that goes all 228 00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:29,720 Speaker 4: the way back. And so that is again tied tied 229 00:10:29,720 --> 00:10:35,440 Speaker 4: to God. With that one boundaries in Eden, there were 230 00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:38,640 Speaker 4: clear boundaries. So it's not even just something that like 231 00:10:38,760 --> 00:10:41,280 Speaker 4: here now we have to have all these rules and things, 232 00:10:41,360 --> 00:10:45,440 Speaker 4: but actually, even before, boundaries were there because God cared 233 00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:48,400 Speaker 4: for us and wanted us to be in this safe place. 234 00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:54,439 Speaker 1: And then the last one is goodness. When God created. 235 00:10:54,080 --> 00:10:56,600 Speaker 4: Everything and he called it good, And if you look 236 00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:58,199 Speaker 4: at the root word of good is the fact that 237 00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:01,280 Speaker 4: it was perfect, like this was exist exactly how God 238 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:04,120 Speaker 4: wanted everything to be in that garden, And even though 239 00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:06,560 Speaker 4: we're outside of it, there are still bits of that 240 00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:10,120 Speaker 4: goodness that He has throughout here, those things that help 241 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:12,600 Speaker 4: us remind us of Him, help draw us. 242 00:11:12,559 --> 00:11:13,560 Speaker 3: Back to Him. 243 00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:15,880 Speaker 1: I feel like those little blessings along the way. 244 00:11:15,880 --> 00:11:18,760 Speaker 2: I think there's this sense in us of we still 245 00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:21,199 Speaker 2: want Eden, and so I think we try to create 246 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:24,520 Speaker 2: our own Eden through perfectionism, control, and constant activity. So 247 00:11:24,679 --> 00:11:28,960 Speaker 2: why did those approaches ultimately leave us feeling more restless 248 00:11:29,160 --> 00:11:30,480 Speaker 2: instead of more at peace? 249 00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:31,880 Speaker 1: Yeah? 250 00:11:31,880 --> 00:11:34,559 Speaker 4: Because I think that again, that's like, why are we 251 00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:38,760 Speaker 4: wrestling with control? Why are we wrestling with comfort? Because 252 00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:41,839 Speaker 4: we originally were designed to be in Eden where there 253 00:11:42,040 --> 00:11:44,640 Speaker 4: was this bit of comfort, there was a bit of 254 00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:47,559 Speaker 4: this control because even back all the way back then, 255 00:11:47,600 --> 00:11:51,280 Speaker 4: we were given this stewardship which was a form of control, 256 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:54,640 Speaker 4: like God gave us control in the garden. But then 257 00:11:54,679 --> 00:11:56,960 Speaker 4: when the fall happened, we twisted it and it's no 258 00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:00,319 Speaker 4: longer stewarding something for God's glory in his time. 259 00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:01,600 Speaker 1: It's all about my time. 260 00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:04,200 Speaker 4: How I wanted to look the outcomes of it, and 261 00:12:04,280 --> 00:12:07,120 Speaker 4: the same thing with comfort, like how God has the 262 00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:10,600 Speaker 4: environment in Eden to comfort his people. But we now 263 00:12:10,679 --> 00:12:13,360 Speaker 4: are building our own Eden when it comes to our 264 00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:16,440 Speaker 4: own forms of comfort, our own forms of control. And 265 00:12:16,480 --> 00:12:18,960 Speaker 4: then the problem with that is when you build your 266 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:22,640 Speaker 4: own Eden, you're now in charge of maintaining it, and 267 00:12:22,679 --> 00:12:25,840 Speaker 4: that's exhausting and you have to keep it up or 268 00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:29,000 Speaker 4: that whole thing's gonna fall down. But when you instead 269 00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:33,120 Speaker 4: are looking for the gifts of Eden that God has, 270 00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:37,679 Speaker 4: God's Eden, you are intentionally looking after the things. So 271 00:12:37,720 --> 00:12:40,680 Speaker 4: that's the cultivation part, where you're being intentional going after 272 00:12:40,720 --> 00:12:43,520 Speaker 4: those and then you're trusting God for the increase, God 273 00:12:43,559 --> 00:12:46,200 Speaker 4: for the provision, God for the outcomes. 274 00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:50,880 Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, for the woman that is feeling overwhelmed and 275 00:12:50,960 --> 00:12:54,240 Speaker 2: exhausted from trying to hold everything together, what's the first 276 00:12:54,280 --> 00:12:56,079 Speaker 2: step toward releasing that pressure. 277 00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:57,719 Speaker 1: Yeah, because it could be whole a hard thing. 278 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:01,680 Speaker 4: I think that women today are holding a lot because 279 00:13:01,679 --> 00:13:04,679 Speaker 4: a lot of us have careers as well as families 280 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:07,480 Speaker 4: and the schedules. We often are the ones in charge 281 00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:10,640 Speaker 4: of our family schedule, and I think because our brains 282 00:13:10,679 --> 00:13:13,800 Speaker 4: are just designed to multitask a bit more, we just 283 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:16,560 Speaker 4: kind of keep taking on all of it. So there's 284 00:13:16,600 --> 00:13:19,520 Speaker 4: a part of us that believes that if I don't 285 00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:20,559 Speaker 4: do it, it won't get done. 286 00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:22,760 Speaker 1: If I don't do it this way, it won't get 287 00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:23,240 Speaker 1: done right. 288 00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:25,320 Speaker 4: And so there is a part of it, and this 289 00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:28,240 Speaker 4: is speaking from my own experience, that there are things 290 00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:31,040 Speaker 4: that I have on my plate that don't necessarily need 291 00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:33,800 Speaker 4: to be there, Like there are things that I can 292 00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:36,160 Speaker 4: release and give to others. 293 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:37,880 Speaker 1: And there are some people who are willing to take it. 294 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:40,920 Speaker 4: I just am wanting to control the outcome of it 295 00:13:41,280 --> 00:13:45,160 Speaker 4: and control how the thing looks at the expense of 296 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:49,080 Speaker 4: my overwhelm and exhaustion. But to even do that stuff, 297 00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:53,080 Speaker 4: I have to trust God and go to him to 298 00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:57,360 Speaker 4: help him, help him, help me differentiate and discern what 299 00:13:57,440 --> 00:13:58,880 Speaker 4: are the things you've actually asked me to do? 300 00:13:58,960 --> 00:13:59,200 Speaker 3: God? 301 00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:02,679 Speaker 4: What are the things that you're asking me to hand 302 00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:04,720 Speaker 4: over to someone else, and when we hand them over, 303 00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:08,400 Speaker 4: we trust God to take it from there, Like we 304 00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:11,880 Speaker 4: don't continue to manage this thing that we just tried 305 00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:15,079 Speaker 4: to release to another and so like very first thing 306 00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:18,280 Speaker 4: comes to like trusting God to be the provider and 307 00:14:18,320 --> 00:14:20,280 Speaker 4: to be the one who brings the outcomes. 308 00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:24,320 Speaker 2: Talk to us about identifying false edens that we have 309 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:26,480 Speaker 2: built in our lives. What are some practical ways we 310 00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:28,480 Speaker 2: can begin to recognize those patterns? 311 00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:32,040 Speaker 4: Well, any false eaten is going to be fleeting, like 312 00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:36,560 Speaker 4: it will not last. And if you know true peace 313 00:14:36,560 --> 00:14:39,880 Speaker 4: in God, so you'll be able to feel like, what 314 00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:43,040 Speaker 4: does true peace feel like? And what is this false 315 00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:50,040 Speaker 4: manufactured piece? Often we zone out, We try to shut 316 00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:53,920 Speaker 4: our brains down, and that's one way of like dissociating 317 00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:57,000 Speaker 4: and trying to remove ourselves and thinking that like if 318 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,240 Speaker 4: I just shut myself down and shut everything out, I 319 00:14:59,280 --> 00:15:02,120 Speaker 4: can maybe we catch my breath before I can get 320 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:04,680 Speaker 4: back out there. But that hasn't taken care of any 321 00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:08,200 Speaker 4: of the overwhelming things at all. You're doing a temporary 322 00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:11,960 Speaker 4: step back. But if it's not anything that's rooted in 323 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,640 Speaker 4: going to the source of true piece that stuff's just 324 00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:17,200 Speaker 4: all going to come back right over the top of you, 325 00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:18,440 Speaker 4: like these big waves. 326 00:15:19,560 --> 00:15:19,760 Speaker 1: Yeah. 327 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,400 Speaker 4: I think things that show us that we are overwhelmed 328 00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:26,720 Speaker 4: and that we are not going to the true source 329 00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:29,200 Speaker 4: of Eden instead of building our own. Like we generally 330 00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:32,040 Speaker 4: will have resentment towards others because we've taken way on 331 00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:35,200 Speaker 4: way too much, and we are expecting stuff of others 332 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:36,920 Speaker 4: that we haven't necessarily communicated. 333 00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:40,800 Speaker 1: We're very impatient and we're short with others. 334 00:15:40,920 --> 00:15:44,800 Speaker 4: We have way more things on our plate, which a 335 00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:48,080 Speaker 4: lot of us do. But the constant thought is that, 336 00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:51,400 Speaker 4: I like, if you keep thinking I have to hold 337 00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:54,080 Speaker 4: it all together, I think that's one little clue there 338 00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:56,200 Speaker 4: is the fact that you've got that running through your mind. 339 00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:59,560 Speaker 4: Then that is you believing that this thing all is 340 00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:00,160 Speaker 4: up to you. 341 00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:05,440 Speaker 3: So we're going to. 342 00:16:05,480 --> 00:16:08,240 Speaker 2: Take another brief break to thank our sponsor, and when 343 00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:10,560 Speaker 2: we come back, we'll talk about how to cultivate true 344 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:15,480 Speaker 2: peace through communion with God, healthy boundaries, and rest. 345 00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:18,720 Speaker 3: Welcome back. I'm talking with Nicole J. 346 00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:21,600 Speaker 2: Suvar about her book I Don't have to hold it 347 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,600 Speaker 2: all together. When you told us about all of those 348 00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:28,000 Speaker 2: seven originally that we were talking about, I think rest 349 00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:31,280 Speaker 2: is something that so many of us really struggle if 350 00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:33,880 Speaker 2: we feel so guilty to rest, and even when we 351 00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:37,400 Speaker 2: do rest, it's not even true rest. It's like, you know, 352 00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:40,360 Speaker 2: scrolling social media or watching Netflix or whatever, and then, 353 00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:43,280 Speaker 2: like you said that, we end up still just as 354 00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:45,280 Speaker 2: overwhelmed and just as anxious as before. 355 00:16:46,720 --> 00:16:48,680 Speaker 3: So what does true. 356 00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:52,000 Speaker 2: God designed rest look like and how is it different 357 00:16:52,040 --> 00:16:53,520 Speaker 2: from simply just slowing down? 358 00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:54,360 Speaker 1: Hmmm? 359 00:16:55,800 --> 00:17:00,960 Speaker 4: Yes, In that chapter, I really explore how like from 360 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:03,960 Speaker 4: the very beginning, God rested to kind of as an example. 361 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,080 Speaker 1: I mean, God wasn't tired, but he. 362 00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:10,640 Speaker 4: Knew that we as humans would need to rest because 363 00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:13,760 Speaker 4: that's how he designed us. And he could have designed 364 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:16,320 Speaker 4: us to go twenty four to seven all the time 365 00:17:16,359 --> 00:17:19,960 Speaker 4: like a robot. But when if we were able to 366 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:25,720 Speaker 4: do that twenty four to seven, we would believe that 367 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:27,840 Speaker 4: it was all up to us to be the producer. 368 00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:29,880 Speaker 4: I mean, we have to rest, and we still fall 369 00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:32,320 Speaker 4: into that trap of believing that it's all up to us. 370 00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:36,120 Speaker 4: But He has given us those limitations of the fact 371 00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:39,280 Speaker 4: that our bodies need to shut it down and rest, 372 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:44,000 Speaker 4: because when we do that, it is us in an 373 00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:49,160 Speaker 4: actionable way, communicating that I am not God and that 374 00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:52,200 Speaker 4: he is, and that I am not the sole provider 375 00:17:52,359 --> 00:17:57,280 Speaker 4: and producer and that he is. And so even every Sabbath, 376 00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:59,680 Speaker 4: like every seventh day, that's how I had with his 377 00:18:00,119 --> 00:18:02,040 Speaker 4: with the Israelites, even from all the way back, and 378 00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:06,040 Speaker 4: then like to do that every seventh day to acknowledge 379 00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:09,040 Speaker 4: like for the full day, I'm trusting in you to 380 00:18:09,119 --> 00:18:11,800 Speaker 4: be the sole provider. And how He even has built 381 00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:14,880 Speaker 4: that into us that needing it every twenty four hours 382 00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:16,480 Speaker 4: or less than twenty four hours. 383 00:18:16,240 --> 00:18:20,639 Speaker 1: We are needing to shut down and trust in him. 384 00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:22,760 Speaker 4: I've thought about this a few of our times, and 385 00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:25,240 Speaker 4: it just kind of blows my mind that like He 386 00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:29,520 Speaker 4: created us to be these humans that when we shut down, 387 00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:33,719 Speaker 4: like we're out, we are completely unaware about anything that 388 00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:36,520 Speaker 4: else is going on. And so they're like, isn't that 389 00:18:36,560 --> 00:18:39,639 Speaker 4: bonkers that like when we sleep we are just like everything's. 390 00:18:39,320 --> 00:18:41,919 Speaker 3: Just it really is it is? 391 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:42,919 Speaker 1: I mean, we just do it. 392 00:18:43,440 --> 00:18:45,280 Speaker 5: Yeah, I know, but if you really like think about it, 393 00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:50,000 Speaker 5: you're like, yeah, we really are completely out. And I 394 00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:53,080 Speaker 5: mean just in that act alone is showing like I 395 00:18:53,119 --> 00:18:55,520 Speaker 5: am trusting God to watch over. Why the fact that 396 00:18:55,560 --> 00:18:58,919 Speaker 5: I'm completely out and unknown of like what else is 397 00:18:58,960 --> 00:19:01,080 Speaker 5: going on. I mean, David speaks about it and the 398 00:19:01,080 --> 00:19:03,639 Speaker 5: songs that when I lie down, I will trust in you, 399 00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:07,240 Speaker 5: like that is his that you are my safety, And 400 00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:10,480 Speaker 5: I think so it just for rest alone is going 401 00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:13,440 Speaker 5: back to the fact that he is the one that's 402 00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:17,880 Speaker 5: providing for us and that he's going. 403 00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:22,040 Speaker 2: To keep working even when we aren't. Yeah, talk to 404 00:19:22,119 --> 00:19:26,000 Speaker 2: us about boundaries. I think that is something that I 405 00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:30,360 Speaker 2: struggle with. So how can setting boundaries actually lead us 406 00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:34,400 Speaker 2: into greater piece instead of guilt? It's okay to say no, right. 407 00:19:34,720 --> 00:19:39,080 Speaker 1: Yes, right. I'm also one of those recovering yes ers. H. 408 00:19:40,280 --> 00:19:40,639 Speaker 3: Yeah. 409 00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:43,040 Speaker 4: I think again that goes back to us with that 410 00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:45,560 Speaker 4: discernment of like, God, is this something that you're asking 411 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:49,160 Speaker 4: me to do? Like there was a number of years 412 00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:52,040 Speaker 4: ago before I became a recovering yes sir, and there 413 00:19:52,119 --> 00:19:55,280 Speaker 4: was something that someone had posted online that said, just 414 00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:59,240 Speaker 4: because you see the need doesn't mean you're the. 415 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,520 Speaker 1: One too address it. And when I read that, I 416 00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:03,960 Speaker 1: was like, m No, I don't think so. 417 00:20:06,520 --> 00:20:08,359 Speaker 4: I very much was like, yes, if I see the 418 00:20:08,440 --> 00:20:09,960 Speaker 4: need and needs to, you know, like I need to 419 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,840 Speaker 4: address it. And it has taken me a while to 420 00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:17,280 Speaker 4: come around to acknowledging that like it's good, like if 421 00:20:17,320 --> 00:20:18,920 Speaker 4: we have the eyes. 422 00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:19,920 Speaker 1: To see the need. 423 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:22,480 Speaker 4: But then maybe it's us taking that need to another 424 00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:26,360 Speaker 4: or us praying for someone else's eyes to be open 425 00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:28,440 Speaker 4: who is supposed to be addressing the need, and also 426 00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:31,120 Speaker 4: just coming to God to pray about, like is this 427 00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:35,800 Speaker 4: something that I need to pick up? Because if it is, 428 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:37,800 Speaker 4: I mean we truly wanted to be discernment. Because if 429 00:20:37,840 --> 00:20:39,280 Speaker 4: it is something that God wants to add to our 430 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,919 Speaker 4: plate because it brings refinement in us, then we do 431 00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,360 Speaker 4: need to step up and say yes. But if we 432 00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:46,760 Speaker 4: are so, if our lives are so full of all 433 00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:49,359 Speaker 4: these yesses that we weren't supposed to be holding, like 434 00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:52,399 Speaker 4: none of it has done well, we're just kind of 435 00:20:52,880 --> 00:20:57,359 Speaker 4: surviving instead of truly helping each of these yesses to thrive. 436 00:20:57,920 --> 00:20:58,760 Speaker 1: So I think like that. 437 00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:01,400 Speaker 4: First boundary with that, and so I actually go two 438 00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:03,320 Speaker 4: different ways with the boundaries in that. So there's the 439 00:21:03,320 --> 00:21:05,800 Speaker 4: boundary of saying no to things that aren't supposed to 440 00:21:05,880 --> 00:21:09,320 Speaker 4: be yours. But then also I speak to the ones 441 00:21:09,359 --> 00:21:13,480 Speaker 4: who have created so many rigid boundaries around things that 442 00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:17,680 Speaker 4: they've cut themselves off from others. They're actually like putting 443 00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:19,720 Speaker 4: these boundaries in place, that I need to follow these 444 00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:22,320 Speaker 4: rules in order to have a relationship with God in 445 00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,840 Speaker 4: order to be saved. Like we can swing wildly in 446 00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:27,280 Speaker 4: different directions when it comes to boundaries. So I also 447 00:21:27,880 --> 00:21:29,919 Speaker 4: look into that too, because when we start having all 448 00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,639 Speaker 4: these rules that tie into our salvation, like, there's a 449 00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:35,960 Speaker 4: whole lot of overwhelming anxiety that comes with that, because 450 00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:37,880 Speaker 4: there's a lot of things you need to keep up 451 00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,000 Speaker 4: in order to keep those boundaries in place. 452 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,720 Speaker 2: There's a saying like this is the most anxious generation. 453 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:45,199 Speaker 1: You know. 454 00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:47,720 Speaker 2: Whether that's true or not, I don't know, but it 455 00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:51,119 Speaker 2: does seem like are we just naming it now like 456 00:21:51,160 --> 00:21:54,480 Speaker 2: we didn't know what it was in our youth? Or 457 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:58,480 Speaker 2: is it that because of technology we are so aware 458 00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:02,000 Speaker 2: of all the things going around all over the world 459 00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:04,399 Speaker 2: and not just with the person next door to you. 460 00:22:04,560 --> 00:22:07,680 Speaker 2: And then there's the comparison of saying, all these people 461 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:10,960 Speaker 2: are doing all these things that look so perfect, even 462 00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:13,920 Speaker 2: though it probably isn't, and I just need to keep up. 463 00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:17,600 Speaker 2: Like there's even just like a pressure from people, there's 464 00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:20,399 Speaker 2: an internal pressure and sometimes, if I'm being honest, I 465 00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:23,840 Speaker 2: even feel like and it's not correct, but I'm just saying, 466 00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:25,720 Speaker 2: this is how I feel that there's this pressure to 467 00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:29,800 Speaker 2: even please God. So there's all this pressure that it 468 00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:31,600 Speaker 2: feels like I want to do all these things and 469 00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:32,760 Speaker 2: I want to do it all. 470 00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:34,240 Speaker 3: So well, why do you think. 471 00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:36,280 Speaker 2: Anxiety is so prevalent today? 472 00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:39,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think actually like it's a factor for all 473 00:22:39,080 --> 00:22:41,399 Speaker 4: those I think that it's there's more of an awareness 474 00:22:41,440 --> 00:22:44,800 Speaker 4: of it. And the awareness is there because of all 475 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:47,520 Speaker 4: of these like the social media that's out there that 476 00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:49,879 Speaker 4: has helped spread it in good and bad. Because I 477 00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:53,520 Speaker 4: feel like there's also this not misdiagnosis, but like some 478 00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,919 Speaker 4: people have like overnamed things where it doesn't necessarily need 479 00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,920 Speaker 4: to be. But then also because we're so aware of 480 00:23:00,960 --> 00:23:04,720 Speaker 4: everything that's going on in all the places at all times, 481 00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:07,280 Speaker 4: we humans were not created to hold onto all that. 482 00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,440 Speaker 4: But yet we scroll through the news and we've got 483 00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:12,719 Speaker 4: all of these horrible things that are happening, and so 484 00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:15,440 Speaker 4: we start carrying all of that. And we also were 485 00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:18,520 Speaker 4: not designed. Like I said, we are designed to belong, 486 00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:22,439 Speaker 4: to be with others, to need other humans, but we 487 00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:26,240 Speaker 4: were not designed to be connected with a thousand people. Yeah, 488 00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:30,240 Speaker 4: like you think of like communities, it's they did the 489 00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:32,879 Speaker 4: like research, it's somewhere like in the one hundred and 490 00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:35,240 Speaker 4: forty three connections or something like that is what a 491 00:23:35,320 --> 00:23:39,000 Speaker 4: human can really maintain in their brain and in their 492 00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:41,760 Speaker 4: heart when it comes to yeah, something like that, like 493 00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,479 Speaker 4: acting like a lot well. And I think when it 494 00:23:44,560 --> 00:23:47,160 Speaker 4: was like looking at like a community, like being able 495 00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:51,080 Speaker 4: to like being within a community, and you don't necessarily 496 00:23:51,119 --> 00:23:55,120 Speaker 4: everyone perfect or you know, like deeply, but you know 497 00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:57,040 Speaker 4: all of these different connections you can do like about 498 00:23:57,040 --> 00:23:59,080 Speaker 4: one hundred and you don't quote me on the exact number, 499 00:23:59,119 --> 00:24:02,520 Speaker 4: but somewhere around and there. And I just think of 500 00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:04,840 Speaker 4: like when Facebook's first came out before that was that 501 00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:09,439 Speaker 4: my Space was before that, and everyone was just like 502 00:24:09,520 --> 00:24:10,840 Speaker 4: how many friends. 503 00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:10,920 Speaker 1: Can I get? 504 00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:13,639 Speaker 4: Well, then suddenly you've got like all of these numbers, 505 00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:16,520 Speaker 4: which is way more than a hundred or so, and 506 00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:20,119 Speaker 4: you maybe maybe you don't connect with them a lot online, 507 00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:22,720 Speaker 4: but suddenly you've got news about them on here. So 508 00:24:22,760 --> 00:24:25,800 Speaker 4: you've got this person's diagnosis, and this person like they 509 00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:28,400 Speaker 4: lost their child, and this person's like their son's going 510 00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:30,960 Speaker 4: off to war. Like you're holding all of this heavy 511 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:34,199 Speaker 4: stuff and even if you don't even realize it, really 512 00:24:34,280 --> 00:24:36,120 Speaker 4: like you've taken it into your brain and your brain 513 00:24:36,160 --> 00:24:38,480 Speaker 4: is processing it, and it's a lot. 514 00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:40,680 Speaker 3: It's a lot. It is a lot. 515 00:24:40,760 --> 00:24:43,680 Speaker 2: And so I really hope that we can free every 516 00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:47,560 Speaker 2: Blendy from this through your book, through something on this podcast. 517 00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:50,560 Speaker 2: So for the woman listening today who feels like peace 518 00:24:50,640 --> 00:24:52,520 Speaker 2: is just out of reach or reserved for a less 519 00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:55,840 Speaker 2: busy season of life, what encouragement would. 520 00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:56,359 Speaker 3: You offer her today? 521 00:24:56,680 --> 00:25:00,400 Speaker 4: Yes, I know when it's it can and be really 522 00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:02,320 Speaker 4: easy to tell him that you don't have to hold 523 00:25:02,359 --> 00:25:05,359 Speaker 4: it all together, because yes, it can sound like relief, 524 00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:08,480 Speaker 4: but it also can sound like, yeah, well you don't 525 00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:09,159 Speaker 4: know my life. 526 00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:11,919 Speaker 3: Yeah right, But I. 527 00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:15,399 Speaker 4: Would just encourage them to really take a deep look 528 00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:17,920 Speaker 4: at what all they're holding and what things do they 529 00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:21,280 Speaker 4: believe is their job to hold all together? And what 530 00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:24,280 Speaker 4: things can they release to others, and what things can 531 00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:28,720 Speaker 4: they relase to God to truly be the one to 532 00:25:28,800 --> 00:25:31,920 Speaker 4: get something done. Ultimately, all of these things that God 533 00:25:31,960 --> 00:25:33,760 Speaker 4: has asked you to do, He's never asked you for 534 00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:36,520 Speaker 4: the outcome, and he's never asked you to hold it together. 535 00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:39,720 Speaker 4: He's asking you to serve with Him in one way 536 00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,240 Speaker 4: or another, one way to refine you. But another one 537 00:25:42,280 --> 00:25:45,440 Speaker 4: to help others and be the hands and feet of him. 538 00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:47,840 Speaker 4: But he's never asked you to hold it all together. 539 00:25:48,320 --> 00:25:49,160 Speaker 1: And he's never. 540 00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:52,600 Speaker 4: Asked you to produce and create an outcome of something. 541 00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:57,280 Speaker 4: And so that's the part that I'm inviting you into 542 00:25:57,400 --> 00:25:59,760 Speaker 4: that you don't none of this, You don't have to 543 00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:00,600 Speaker 4: hold it all together. 544 00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:03,679 Speaker 2: So is there a biblical concept of love that you 545 00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:05,800 Speaker 2: think applies to this topic today? 546 00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:06,440 Speaker 1: Yeah? 547 00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:10,040 Speaker 4: I really it just goes about what all we're talking about, 548 00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:14,160 Speaker 4: because this is based on Colossians when seventeen that he 549 00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:17,719 Speaker 4: was before all things, and in all things, and in 550 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:21,960 Speaker 4: all things, and is holding everything together. And I see 551 00:26:22,119 --> 00:26:28,000 Speaker 4: love in that because he's again he's never asked us 552 00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:30,800 Speaker 4: to do any of this hard work that he himself 553 00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:34,239 Speaker 4: is the one to do, and the fact that it 554 00:26:34,320 --> 00:26:38,200 Speaker 4: was before and now and to come like just as 555 00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:41,760 Speaker 4: in First Corinthians it says the greatest of these is love, 556 00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:43,000 Speaker 4: because faith. 557 00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:45,399 Speaker 1: And hope they are for now. 558 00:26:45,840 --> 00:26:48,840 Speaker 4: But someday we will no longer need faith and hope 559 00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:51,840 Speaker 4: because we will see him face to face. But he 560 00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,240 Speaker 4: the one who is holding it all together. Even in 561 00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:58,000 Speaker 4: the future, love will still be there. I have at 562 00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:00,640 Speaker 4: the end of my book. I get goose bums thinking 563 00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:02,480 Speaker 4: about it, and even like as I read through it again, 564 00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:05,199 Speaker 4: like I have this picture of us going back to 565 00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:07,960 Speaker 4: Eden when it's the new heaven and the new Earth, 566 00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:09,600 Speaker 4: and the fact that like we can walk in it 567 00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:12,280 Speaker 4: again and we can stand face to face with our 568 00:27:12,320 --> 00:27:16,119 Speaker 4: father and it's all gonna make sense and we're going 569 00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:18,200 Speaker 4: to realize, like, oh, if this was held together by 570 00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:20,800 Speaker 4: you all the time, and it just I think I 571 00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:23,199 Speaker 4: look forward towards that when the times that I'm just 572 00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:28,200 Speaker 4: feeling overwhelmed with things and realizing like he's back then 573 00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:31,639 Speaker 4: and right now and in the future, he loves me 574 00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:33,960 Speaker 4: and he's holding it together. Yeah. 575 00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:36,280 Speaker 3: Amen, I'm so thankful for that truth. 576 00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:36,679 Speaker 1: Amen. 577 00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:40,000 Speaker 3: So Nicole, tell us something you are loving right now. 578 00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:46,040 Speaker 4: Well, right before I record this podcast, I stepped outside 579 00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:47,240 Speaker 4: because we've had some rain. 580 00:27:47,320 --> 00:27:49,399 Speaker 1: We had a rainy spring. I think maybe all. 581 00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:52,040 Speaker 3: Of the US is having a race, yes, us too, yep. 582 00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,680 Speaker 1: And today's actually the sun is shining, I think between thunderstorms. 583 00:27:55,960 --> 00:27:58,399 Speaker 1: And so I went out to check flowers. 584 00:27:58,440 --> 00:28:00,959 Speaker 4: And I have these plants, so I planted in the 585 00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:03,000 Speaker 4: fall and hopes that they would. 586 00:28:02,760 --> 00:28:03,520 Speaker 1: Make it through the winter. 587 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:06,760 Speaker 4: And I'm seeing these little buds poking out, and it's 588 00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:09,800 Speaker 4: a it's just so good to see again like that 589 00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:12,000 Speaker 4: just point to me. It just shows God and like 590 00:28:12,080 --> 00:28:16,560 Speaker 4: his planning of these things that you plant with hope, 591 00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:19,119 Speaker 4: and then even through like a dark winter we had 592 00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:21,520 Speaker 4: a really heavy snow cold winter. 593 00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:24,919 Speaker 1: That these plants are coming out of the ground. I 594 00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:26,560 Speaker 1: just love it. 595 00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:30,439 Speaker 2: There's something about new life and lie a lot of 596 00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:33,720 Speaker 2: sunshine and light that does my heart a lot of 597 00:28:33,720 --> 00:28:35,960 Speaker 2: good too. Yes, yes, well, I know I want to 598 00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:37,879 Speaker 2: stay connected with you. I'm sure listeners are going to 599 00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:39,480 Speaker 2: want to, so tell us how we can best do 600 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:41,400 Speaker 2: that and grab a copy of your new book. 601 00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:45,200 Speaker 4: Yes, they can find me on my website livewo intent 602 00:28:45,600 --> 00:28:47,920 Speaker 4: dot org and they're one of the pages there is 603 00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:51,200 Speaker 4: for books, and my newest book will be right there 604 00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:53,920 Speaker 4: at the top, and there also will be a link 605 00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:56,240 Speaker 4: for a pre order bonus that's going on. There's a 606 00:28:56,280 --> 00:29:01,040 Speaker 4: twenty one day downloadable devotional that I did with twenty 607 00:29:01,080 --> 00:29:04,440 Speaker 4: other authors and creatives and we put this together. It's 608 00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:07,240 Speaker 4: called Held Together twenty one Reminders that you do not 609 00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:09,080 Speaker 4: have to do it alone. And so it's kind of 610 00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:11,920 Speaker 4: again looking at those seven parts of Eden and just 611 00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:13,200 Speaker 4: kind of speaking into. 612 00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,600 Speaker 1: Some practical ways that we can apply it. 613 00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:20,080 Speaker 4: So those go away after the book releases on June seconds, 614 00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:22,120 Speaker 4: so if they want to order now, they can get 615 00:29:22,120 --> 00:29:22,880 Speaker 4: in on that gift. 616 00:29:23,400 --> 00:29:26,040 Speaker 1: And then I also share on Instagram quite often, like 617 00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:28,000 Speaker 1: three times a week. I'm usually doing some kind of 618 00:29:28,120 --> 00:29:32,840 Speaker 1: practical mental health tip or some kind of encouragement at 619 00:29:32,960 --> 00:29:35,320 Speaker 1: Nicole Jsubar and Nicole with an. 620 00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:38,400 Speaker 2: H yes, Well, I'll include that in the shout outs. 621 00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:41,000 Speaker 2: And I had the opportunity to be a part of 622 00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:43,240 Speaker 2: that pre order bonus as well, and so I'd highly 623 00:29:43,240 --> 00:29:46,840 Speaker 2: recommend that to everyone listening. But Nicole, would you pray 624 00:29:46,840 --> 00:29:49,720 Speaker 2: for us? I just know many people may be feeling 625 00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:53,160 Speaker 2: overwhelmed and heavy and anxious even as we're still talking, So. 626 00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:54,720 Speaker 3: Would you just pray over all of our hearts? 627 00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:58,920 Speaker 1: Yes, father, I just asked that you would be beside 628 00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:04,600 Speaker 1: that overwhelmed woman or man that listen to this episode 629 00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:07,760 Speaker 1: and they want to believe that you are the one 630 00:30:07,760 --> 00:30:10,680 Speaker 1: holding all together and it's so hard to release the 631 00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:15,640 Speaker 1: grip of control. I pray that they would feel your presence, 632 00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:18,960 Speaker 1: that they would have the courage to open up those 633 00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:21,880 Speaker 1: fists and to trust you to be the one for 634 00:30:21,960 --> 00:30:25,440 Speaker 1: the outcomes and for the provision. I pray that this 635 00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:28,880 Speaker 1: message today that it will be an encouragement that they 636 00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:32,200 Speaker 1: can go out from here to find ways into see 637 00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:35,360 Speaker 1: ways that you are working it all out and you 638 00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:38,040 Speaker 1: are holding it all together. We love you Jesus, and 639 00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:39,520 Speaker 1: in your name you pray Amen. 640 00:30:40,320 --> 00:30:40,760 Speaker 3: Amen. 641 00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,760 Speaker 2: Nicole, thank you for today and for reminding us that 642 00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:46,680 Speaker 2: we do not have to hold everything all together. 643 00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:49,280 Speaker 1: This has been so good. Thank you, Rachel. 644 00:30:50,520 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 2: Thank you so much for listening to the Love Offering podcast. 645 00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:55,440 Speaker 2: I hope today's conversation reminded you that the piece that 646 00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:57,720 Speaker 2: you've been searching for isn't something you have to create 647 00:30:57,880 --> 00:31:00,880 Speaker 2: or strive for. It's something you're invited to receive. You 648 00:31:00,920 --> 00:31:03,400 Speaker 2: don't have to hold it all together. God is already 649 00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:06,200 Speaker 2: holding you. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it 650 00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:08,200 Speaker 2: with a friend and leave a review. It helps others 651 00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:10,480 Speaker 2: find the show and spreads the message of love even further. 652 00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:12,800 Speaker 2: To connect with me, visit me on my website at 653 00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:15,600 Speaker 2: Rachelcadams dot com, where you can download the Love Always 654 00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:18,240 Speaker 2: devotional at free resource to help you realize how beloved 655 00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:21,400 Speaker 2: you already are. Be sure to check out Nicole's new book, 656 00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:24,480 Speaker 2: I don't have to hold it all together. A special 657 00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:26,920 Speaker 2: thank you to live Audio for supporting this podcast and 658 00:31:26,920 --> 00:31:30,840 Speaker 2: making it possible. To find more great podcast visitlifeaudio dot com. 659 00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:34,240 Speaker 2: Until next time, let's make our lives an offering of love.