1 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:03,520 Speaker 1: Life Audio. 2 00:00:05,960 --> 00:00:09,200 Speaker 2: Welcome to The Love Offering Podcast, where we explore how 3 00:00:09,240 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 2: to live out the greatest commandment to love God, love others, 4 00:00:13,560 --> 00:00:17,639 Speaker 2: and even love ourselves. I'm your host, Rachel Adams, and 5 00:00:17,840 --> 00:00:20,599 Speaker 2: each week, my guests and I share stories of how 6 00:00:20,640 --> 00:00:24,759 Speaker 2: God's love transforms us and overflows into the lives of 7 00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:28,600 Speaker 2: those around us, whether through small acts of kindness or 8 00:00:28,720 --> 00:00:31,920 Speaker 2: powerful moments of faith. We're learning how to make love 9 00:00:32,320 --> 00:00:37,040 Speaker 2: our greatest offering. Well, Hello Brenda, and welcome to the 10 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:39,120 Speaker 2: Love Offering Podcast. I'm so happy to have you. 11 00:00:39,159 --> 00:00:41,120 Speaker 3: Thanks so much for having me. I'm so excited to 12 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:41,480 Speaker 3: be here. 13 00:00:41,680 --> 00:00:45,680 Speaker 2: So you just told me an interesting fact about your hometown. 14 00:00:46,280 --> 00:00:49,280 Speaker 2: I would love to hear more about just your upbringing 15 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:50,960 Speaker 2: and the place that you call home. 16 00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:54,480 Speaker 3: Sure, So, I am from Shipshwana, Indiana, which has been 17 00:00:54,560 --> 00:00:58,400 Speaker 3: voted the number one tourist destination in the Midwest in 18 00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:03,040 Speaker 3: twenty twenty four. It is a very small town and 19 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:06,320 Speaker 3: an Amish and Mennonite community, and I live on a 20 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:09,759 Speaker 3: farm outside of town, about four miles outside of town. 21 00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:12,760 Speaker 3: I married a Mennonite farm boy, a dairy farmer, so 22 00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:14,959 Speaker 3: I was a town girl. I grew up in town 23 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:19,760 Speaker 3: and I married a local man and moved out to 24 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:22,959 Speaker 3: the family farm with him, and we've raised our kids here. 25 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:26,720 Speaker 3: He's one of four boys, and we were dairy farmers 26 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:28,800 Speaker 3: for about the first half of our marriage. He grew 27 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:34,479 Speaker 3: up on the dairy farm. We're both educators, and our 28 00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:39,200 Speaker 3: little town probably brings several hundreds of thousands of people 29 00:01:39,319 --> 00:01:44,200 Speaker 3: into our little space here every year, but we still 30 00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:50,520 Speaker 3: have a culture and a lifestyle that is uncomplicated and 31 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:53,880 Speaker 3: growing up here, you know, you can take for granted 32 00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:57,320 Speaker 3: what you have growing up here and going away to 33 00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:59,800 Speaker 3: a large university, coming back and living here and raising 34 00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:04,240 Speaker 3: our family here. I always thought real life happened elsewhere, 35 00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:08,160 Speaker 3: you know, kind of like I can't really achieve things, 36 00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:11,680 Speaker 3: or what we have here is always kind of not 37 00:02:11,800 --> 00:02:16,480 Speaker 3: quite what other people experience, and so I've always kind 38 00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:20,760 Speaker 3: of thought that that compelling life was found in other communities. 39 00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:23,200 Speaker 3: And it took the pandemic for me to realize, you know, 40 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:26,240 Speaker 3: there's a reason why hundreds of thousands and actually millions 41 00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:29,200 Speaker 3: of people come to our small town each year. We're 42 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:32,880 Speaker 3: having a light parade actually tomorrow or this Saturday, and 43 00:02:32,960 --> 00:02:35,720 Speaker 3: there'll probably be thirty to fifty thousand people who come 44 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:38,400 Speaker 3: in for the light parade, because we have something here 45 00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:41,360 Speaker 3: that does not change over time, even though we adapt 46 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:44,440 Speaker 3: to technology and current trends and all the things. But 47 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:47,840 Speaker 3: there are rhythms and a lifestyle and a groundedness that 48 00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:52,240 Speaker 3: is still embedded here that I realized throughout the pandemic 49 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:56,560 Speaker 3: that most people throughout the country long for. And I 50 00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:59,560 Speaker 3: wrote Uncomplicated so people can know how to implement these 51 00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:03,239 Speaker 3: things in there life without becoming homish, without becoming a homesteader, 52 00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:07,840 Speaker 3: whether you live in the inner city, urban, suburban, rural area. 53 00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:11,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm excited about today's conversation because you're right, life 54 00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:14,880 Speaker 2: is just so busy and we have over complicated what 55 00:03:15,120 --> 00:03:18,560 Speaker 2: maybe God has intended to be more simple of what 56 00:03:18,639 --> 00:03:20,959 Speaker 2: actually is required of us, and maybe some of the 57 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:24,160 Speaker 2: natural rhythms that we are maybe healthier for us to 58 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:26,600 Speaker 2: live in. And so I love that no matter where 59 00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:29,440 Speaker 2: we live, what location God has us in, we can 60 00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:33,800 Speaker 2: institute some of these practices and rhythms that you talk about. 61 00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:37,080 Speaker 2: Let's take a brief break to hear a word from 62 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:39,560 Speaker 2: our sponsor, and then we're going to continue our conversation. 63 00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:45,160 Speaker 2: So your book Uncomplicated, the title suggests secrets for a 64 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:49,000 Speaker 2: compelling life. So how would you define a compelling life 65 00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:51,760 Speaker 2: and why do you believe simplicity is the key to 66 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:52,360 Speaker 2: achieving it. 67 00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:56,240 Speaker 3: Well, I think compelling is something that draws us. Right 68 00:03:56,360 --> 00:03:59,720 Speaker 3: when we think about something that's compelling, it is something 69 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:03,840 Speaker 3: that intrigues us, is what we want. There's a vibrancy there. 70 00:04:04,440 --> 00:04:08,400 Speaker 3: It is something that invites us and makes us want 71 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:12,640 Speaker 3: to be thriving. There's something about compelling that's thriving. I'm 72 00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:14,640 Speaker 3: going to challenge a little bit. So your question was, 73 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:18,200 Speaker 3: what about kind of simple living? And uncomplicated? Is not 74 00:04:18,200 --> 00:04:21,640 Speaker 3: so much about simple living. It really is about uncomplicating 75 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,640 Speaker 3: the lives that we are living. And there's a difference 76 00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:27,200 Speaker 3: there because when we think about simple living, that's what 77 00:04:27,279 --> 00:04:29,159 Speaker 3: I think about when I think about the Amish like 78 00:04:29,279 --> 00:04:33,600 Speaker 3: simplicity in what we purchase, how we live almost a 79 00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:38,839 Speaker 3: set of partners, whereas uncomplicating our lives is really walking 80 00:04:38,839 --> 00:04:42,400 Speaker 3: out reality of life is complicated, but it's how we 81 00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:47,839 Speaker 3: approach life with our values, clarification, with things that filter 82 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:51,080 Speaker 3: what we will and won't do, the importance of a 83 00:04:51,200 --> 00:04:54,320 Speaker 3: complicating our lives and having a compelling life is that 84 00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:57,039 Speaker 3: we tend to think that the two can't coincide. We 85 00:04:57,120 --> 00:05:01,200 Speaker 3: think that you can't somehow maybe have a simpler lifestyle 86 00:05:01,480 --> 00:05:05,440 Speaker 3: or an uncomplicated life and still be in the know 87 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:09,760 Speaker 3: or in modern culture, or be using technology. We tend 88 00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:12,240 Speaker 3: to separate the two. Either have to be all in, 89 00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:16,800 Speaker 3: super busy, super hyper engage in everything, or we have 90 00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:20,359 Speaker 3: to completely disengage and have a lifestyle that really doesn't 91 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:23,560 Speaker 3: seem realistic or that isn't really one that we would 92 00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:27,040 Speaker 3: have because while it looks well, it looks good on Instagram, 93 00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:30,039 Speaker 3: I'm somehow going to miss something if I live that life. 94 00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:34,080 Speaker 3: And uncomplicated really is about the invitation of the lives 95 00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:38,200 Speaker 3: that most people have lived throughout time. It's timeless of 96 00:05:38,240 --> 00:05:41,320 Speaker 3: this kind of a middle way, realizing that we don't 97 00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:45,440 Speaker 3: have to completely succumb to everything that society and culture 98 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:48,680 Speaker 3: technology offers us, but we also don't have to give 99 00:05:48,760 --> 00:05:52,040 Speaker 3: up everything that we really desire in order to have 100 00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:56,640 Speaker 3: a more sustainable, grounded, centered, breathable life. 101 00:05:56,720 --> 00:06:00,960 Speaker 2: So you mentioned drawing on the wisdom of generations past 102 00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:05,480 Speaker 2: and the Amish lifestyle. What lessons from these sources do 103 00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:07,799 Speaker 2: you find most relevant for modern women. 104 00:06:08,080 --> 00:06:11,000 Speaker 3: I think kind of one one would be a more 105 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:14,839 Speaker 3: middle way like middle way of thinking, middle way of 106 00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:24,120 Speaker 3: balanced in a mindset and behavior, and even a walking 107 00:06:24,279 --> 00:06:29,360 Speaker 3: out of centeredness that is a little bit slower paced, 108 00:06:29,560 --> 00:06:34,440 Speaker 3: one that doesn't have to become easily upset or overwhelmed 109 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:39,559 Speaker 3: with things that shipwreck your life with plant unplanned plan. 110 00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:43,400 Speaker 3: I think sometimes we think that having a balanced life 111 00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:47,200 Speaker 3: means that everything is always in sync and that we 112 00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:53,360 Speaker 3: always have control of everything. And really it's about being 113 00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:58,520 Speaker 3: very grounded in your values and your principles, so that 114 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:07,520 Speaker 3: every thing that you are doing, thinking, being about raising kids, working, 115 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:11,960 Speaker 3: all of those things are always kind of filtered through 116 00:07:13,560 --> 00:07:17,480 Speaker 3: your core values, and that takes an assessment that is 117 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:20,680 Speaker 3: always kind of moving and changing because how we applied 118 00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:23,440 Speaker 3: biblical principles, perhaps our thirties is going to look a 119 00:07:23,520 --> 00:07:26,560 Speaker 3: little bit different in our late forties or our sixties. 120 00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:30,560 Speaker 3: Our values are constantly being refined every season. And there's 121 00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:33,280 Speaker 3: also this element of what I call them the book 122 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:37,280 Speaker 3: equanimity and forebearans. So equanimity and forebearents are old fashioned 123 00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:41,600 Speaker 3: words for a calm, even mindedness in difficult situations, and 124 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:45,480 Speaker 3: I think that's one of the core messages in Uncomplicated, 125 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:48,920 Speaker 3: is that as women in the twenty first century we 126 00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:52,880 Speaker 3: have let go of what our grandmothers are. Great grandmothers 127 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:57,240 Speaker 3: lived out in harder times when they had less luxuries, 128 00:07:57,240 --> 00:08:00,040 Speaker 3: they had less leisure time, they had more work to 129 00:07:59,840 --> 00:08:02,160 Speaker 3: do just to have food on the table and then 130 00:08:02,360 --> 00:08:05,200 Speaker 3: raise their kids. Life was hard, and yet they weren't 131 00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:09,760 Speaker 3: shipwrecked every time something disrupted their life or their plan. 132 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:13,440 Speaker 3: And so I draw on one example that I've learned 133 00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:15,880 Speaker 3: as a dairy farmer's wife, which is cows have to 134 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:18,480 Speaker 3: be milk twice a day, every day. There's no getting around. 135 00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:20,240 Speaker 3: It doesn't matter if you don't feel good. It doesn't 136 00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:22,040 Speaker 3: matter if you're sick, doesn't matter if your mom just 137 00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:24,320 Speaker 3: died the day before. Every morning, you get up and 138 00:08:24,360 --> 00:08:26,160 Speaker 3: you go out and you milk cows. And there's something 139 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:30,880 Speaker 3: about a daily rhythm that is predictable, that is also 140 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:35,400 Speaker 3: something outside of you, where you're caring for someone something 141 00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:38,840 Speaker 3: a cow, but you're also doing something productive. Milking a 142 00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:41,720 Speaker 3: cow is going to the store shelves in just a 143 00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:46,280 Speaker 3: few days. It's this interdependence and responsibility to something outside 144 00:08:46,320 --> 00:08:49,400 Speaker 3: of ourselves that even draws us to get up every 145 00:08:49,440 --> 00:08:54,040 Speaker 3: day and be responsible, and that those rhythms and needs 146 00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:56,200 Speaker 3: were so much a part of life in the past, 147 00:08:56,480 --> 00:08:58,680 Speaker 3: and I think is part of that presence in the 148 00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:01,959 Speaker 3: Amish life that it just draws us back to how 149 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:06,360 Speaker 3: God created us as humans to be interdependent with our nature, 150 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:09,400 Speaker 3: with our families, with our communities, And it's kind of 151 00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:13,280 Speaker 3: the underlying stability that used to be in past generations 152 00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:16,560 Speaker 3: but is really gone by the wayside with self serving, 153 00:09:16,720 --> 00:09:20,440 Speaker 3: no values, with do it now, instant gratification, all of 154 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:23,560 Speaker 3: those things that have really taken over modern culture. 155 00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:28,199 Speaker 2: So as we incorporate simplicity into our daily laves, especially 156 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:31,200 Speaker 2: with the modern demands of family and life and careers 157 00:09:31,200 --> 00:09:36,920 Speaker 2: and technology, how can we incorporate more of these practices practically. 158 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:39,680 Speaker 3: Well, I think it depends on which ones you're looking at. 159 00:09:39,720 --> 00:09:41,640 Speaker 3: So let me just share real quick kind of the 160 00:09:41,720 --> 00:09:44,679 Speaker 3: ten values, mindsets and behaviors that I have. It uncomplicated 161 00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:47,839 Speaker 3: because they can be very simple because the first one 162 00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:52,600 Speaker 3: is contentment. So part of incorporating contentment into your daily 163 00:09:52,679 --> 00:09:55,040 Speaker 3: rhythm in a daily life that's outside of a farm 164 00:09:56,559 --> 00:10:01,839 Speaker 3: is realizing that your daydaily life, what you're doing. If 165 00:10:01,880 --> 00:10:03,880 Speaker 3: today we're the only day that you had, would you 166 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:06,760 Speaker 3: be satisfied with that? Like, are we constantly looking for 167 00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:09,400 Speaker 3: the next are we constantly looking for what's just outside 168 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:11,880 Speaker 3: of our reach? So that would be one simple way 169 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:14,480 Speaker 3: is what are simple practices you can put into your 170 00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:19,840 Speaker 3: life today that would nurture contentment, gratitude, journal even while 171 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:22,280 Speaker 3: you're driving on the way to drop your kids off 172 00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:24,600 Speaker 3: at school, talking as a family about what is one 173 00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:27,040 Speaker 3: thing today that we're grateful for? What is one thing 174 00:10:27,080 --> 00:10:29,120 Speaker 3: today that if it was all we did, we would 175 00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:32,920 Speaker 3: really be happy. Have those conversations with your kids. The 176 00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:40,400 Speaker 3: other nine values include practicality, prudence, fidelity, resourcefulness, equanimity, and 177 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:46,120 Speaker 3: forbearans stewardship, interdependence, being grounded and humble, and then foresight, 178 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:49,440 Speaker 3: which is heritage and legacy. And if that's not ten, 179 00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:52,400 Speaker 3: and I may have missed one in there, but one 180 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:56,600 Speaker 3: of my favorite ones probably within that is practicality in 181 00:10:56,960 --> 00:11:00,360 Speaker 3: thinking about needs versus once what is a need that 182 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:03,040 Speaker 3: we have and how can we get it met in 183 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:06,559 Speaker 3: the way that is best for our season, for our lifestyle, weather, 184 00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:08,560 Speaker 3: it has to do with finances, whether it has to 185 00:11:08,559 --> 00:11:11,400 Speaker 3: do with time, whether it has to do with the 186 00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:15,480 Speaker 3: amount of resources we have to either expend or to save. 187 00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:19,480 Speaker 3: Thinking about what's just the simplest way to get this 188 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:21,920 Speaker 3: need met and just keep it at that. Every time 189 00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:23,800 Speaker 3: I go to a big walk store, like when I 190 00:11:23,840 --> 00:11:25,840 Speaker 3: go to Walmart, or if I go to Meyer to 191 00:11:25,880 --> 00:11:27,840 Speaker 3: go my groceries. You walk in there and I know, 192 00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:30,280 Speaker 3: for a lot of people, maybe Costco. You know, I 193 00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:32,640 Speaker 3: just need cheerios, That's all I need. But we walk 194 00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:35,199 Speaker 3: in there, what do we see. There's probably one hundred 195 00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:38,119 Speaker 3: and fifty cereals and there's probably eight types of cheerios. 196 00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:42,800 Speaker 3: So part of these practical simple ways with a lot 197 00:11:42,840 --> 00:11:45,360 Speaker 3: of things is just to narrow down our choices. Even 198 00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:48,199 Speaker 3: when we go to look online for research for something, 199 00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:50,240 Speaker 3: Oh I want to I want to figure this out. 200 00:11:50,360 --> 00:11:52,720 Speaker 3: How many times do we get caught in the Pinterest 201 00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:56,840 Speaker 3: or the Instagram or the Amazon rabbit hole of finding 202 00:11:56,920 --> 00:11:59,720 Speaker 3: so many choices that then we become overwhelmed and we 203 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:01,840 Speaker 3: don't don't order the thing we thought we were going 204 00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:04,400 Speaker 3: to order after all, or we do so much research 205 00:12:04,679 --> 00:12:07,760 Speaker 3: that there's always a bottomless pit. And so my encouragement 206 00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:11,480 Speaker 3: would be, how can we lessen uncomplicate some of those 207 00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:15,160 Speaker 3: things as far as choices, as far as just say, 208 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,560 Speaker 3: I'm going to look on three websites to research this, 209 00:12:18,120 --> 00:12:19,960 Speaker 3: and I'm going to leave it at that, and you 210 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:23,680 Speaker 3: do those things and you come to the best educated decision. Boy, 211 00:12:23,760 --> 00:12:26,640 Speaker 3: that's a really big, open ended question for a lot 212 00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:29,400 Speaker 3: of these different things, Rachel. So I'm gonna bring it 213 00:12:29,440 --> 00:12:31,800 Speaker 3: back to you to see if there's something that piques 214 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:33,680 Speaker 3: your interests that you want to know a little bit more. 215 00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:34,000 Speaker 1: Yeah. 216 00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,839 Speaker 2: No, I want to know about all of them, because 217 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:38,040 Speaker 2: they all pique my interest. Is there one that you 218 00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:40,960 Speaker 2: find that's most difficult for you to live out? I 219 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:44,319 Speaker 2: would probably say contentment, because I think the others are 220 00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:48,640 Speaker 2: just more practical. Resourcefulness, pretty practical, or at least practical 221 00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:51,520 Speaker 2: for me being a farmer's wife, I think that I've 222 00:12:51,559 --> 00:12:53,840 Speaker 2: had to learn some things growing up in town Night. 223 00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,440 Speaker 2: I didn't have those skills coming into marriage, but I 224 00:12:56,520 --> 00:12:58,600 Speaker 2: learned them real quickly, because you have to. But I 225 00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:02,760 Speaker 2: do think contentment is one of those values, mindsets, and 226 00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:07,120 Speaker 2: behaviors that's biblical. It was the first human struggle. I've 227 00:13:07,240 --> 00:13:10,600 Speaker 2: had everything she needed, including a relationship with God where 228 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:12,600 Speaker 2: he walked and talked with her in the garden, and 229 00:13:12,640 --> 00:13:15,679 Speaker 2: what did you do? She said, You've given me everything, 230 00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:17,800 Speaker 2: but I want that over there. And so I think 231 00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:22,319 Speaker 2: for women, especially contentment is this element of there's always 232 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:26,160 Speaker 2: something that's better, that is going to satisfy us more, 233 00:13:26,559 --> 00:13:29,720 Speaker 2: just beyond our reach. And I chose that as the 234 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:34,679 Speaker 2: very first chapter and uncomplicated because I think during the pandemic, 235 00:13:34,760 --> 00:13:36,880 Speaker 2: when everything was shut down and I was sitting on 236 00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:39,080 Speaker 2: my front porch and I was having this conversation with 237 00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:41,160 Speaker 2: God about what are we going to do until things 238 00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:44,080 Speaker 2: become normal again? And it was almost as if He 239 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:47,000 Speaker 2: spoke to me through nature, because it was in early spring, 240 00:13:47,040 --> 00:13:49,800 Speaker 2: it was in March, and the daffodils were coming up, 241 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:52,040 Speaker 2: and there was an email that someone has sent me 242 00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:54,120 Speaker 2: that had this question inside of it that said, if 243 00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:57,520 Speaker 2: today is the only day you have, if life is 244 00:13:57,559 --> 00:13:59,960 Speaker 2: as good as it gets, what is my response to that? 245 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:03,960 Speaker 2: And I realized that what if this pandemic shut down 246 00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:07,920 Speaker 2: thing never got any better? Could I be satisfied and 247 00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:10,280 Speaker 2: content with what God had given me? And it's then 248 00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:13,280 Speaker 2: that I really realized what He had given me. I 249 00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:15,880 Speaker 2: always thought, being raised in this small town, living on 250 00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:20,520 Speaker 2: a farm in Amish country nowhere Indiana, that life was 251 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:23,680 Speaker 2: always more vibrant and exciting someplace else. And it was 252 00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:25,920 Speaker 2: through this process that He showed me just like he 253 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:28,080 Speaker 2: probably does for any of us, that no matter where 254 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:30,680 Speaker 2: we are, this is the life He's given us. And 255 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:33,360 Speaker 2: if this were only the life he gave us for 256 00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:36,200 Speaker 2: where we are today, And honestly, I've had several friends 257 00:14:36,240 --> 00:14:39,680 Speaker 2: who've passed away in the last year unexpectedly. I'm in 258 00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:42,840 Speaker 2: early midlife. If today was all we had, how can 259 00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:48,560 Speaker 2: I be fully satisfied? Doesn't mean them joyful about hard circumstances, 260 00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:51,480 Speaker 2: or that you don't ever strive for things that you 261 00:14:51,520 --> 00:14:54,200 Speaker 2: want to achieve, But it really is this element we 262 00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:58,400 Speaker 2: always keep in tandem of full contentment and joy with 263 00:14:58,520 --> 00:15:04,760 Speaker 2: where we are, with that ongoing compelling motivation to still 264 00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:08,280 Speaker 2: reach our goals and to dream and to pursue, but 265 00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:13,240 Speaker 2: also at the same time still be very full of 266 00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,600 Speaker 2: the life that God's given us today. Do you see 267 00:15:15,640 --> 00:15:21,120 Speaker 2: any biblical examples of these ten rhythms that you have 268 00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:24,600 Speaker 2: identified to uncomplicate life? Do you do you find any 269 00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:28,280 Speaker 2: examples or somebody that lived those out well biblically. 270 00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:31,800 Speaker 3: Well, I'm going to throw a wrench into everything, because well, 271 00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:33,880 Speaker 3: I'm going to say a couple of things. Yes, for 272 00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:37,280 Speaker 3: each for all ten, there are biblical examples principles for 273 00:15:37,280 --> 00:15:40,480 Speaker 3: all of them. I'm going to say that Proverbs thirty 274 00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:43,880 Speaker 3: one woman probably is the one who walks them out. 275 00:15:44,560 --> 00:15:46,800 Speaker 3: But we tend to think of the Proverbs thirty one 276 00:15:46,840 --> 00:15:50,080 Speaker 3: woman as being one person in one day at one 277 00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:53,880 Speaker 3: point of her lifetime, when really she examples these things 278 00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:57,920 Speaker 3: over her lifetime, because at the end of Proverbs thirty 279 00:15:57,920 --> 00:16:00,840 Speaker 3: one it talks about her children will rise up and 280 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:04,920 Speaker 3: call her blest and that her husband is receiving praise 281 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,720 Speaker 3: at the gates of the city because of her lifestyle. 282 00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:11,320 Speaker 3: And I don't know about you, but my kids are 283 00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:13,520 Speaker 3: all at the age now where they might rise up 284 00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:16,240 Speaker 3: when Colby was it, because they're all adults now. They're 285 00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:18,240 Speaker 3: not going to do that when they're teenagers, let alone 286 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:22,080 Speaker 3: they're younger. This is a woman like my mother in law, 287 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:25,040 Speaker 3: who was a farmer's wife, who I watched her crops 288 00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:28,760 Speaker 3: her lifespan, and she did die earlier than she should have, 289 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:34,640 Speaker 3: in her mid sixties, but she lived that out. I 290 00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:37,280 Speaker 3: watched her every day, day in and day out. She 291 00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:40,440 Speaker 3: didn't get up every morning at four o'clock and do 292 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:43,280 Speaker 3: all those things that the Proverbs thirty one woman did, 293 00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:45,600 Speaker 3: but she did all of those things over her lifetime. 294 00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:49,840 Speaker 3: And I think that is the piece, is that prudence 295 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:53,480 Speaker 3: is not Prudence is a very highly esteemed virtue, that 296 00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:57,400 Speaker 3: was one of the four virtues most valued in the 297 00:16:57,440 --> 00:17:01,240 Speaker 3: Catholic Church and even in ancient societies, because it's thinking 298 00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:04,120 Speaker 3: and pausing. If I do this, then this is going 299 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:07,160 Speaker 3: to be the result. And as twenty first century women, 300 00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:10,119 Speaker 3: we are not very wise. We don't think a lot 301 00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:13,719 Speaker 3: about cause and effect. If I do this, this is 302 00:17:13,760 --> 00:17:15,920 Speaker 3: going to be the result, and is this the best choice? 303 00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:18,679 Speaker 3: We don't filter most of our choices through that lens. 304 00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:21,760 Speaker 3: The Proverbs thirty one woman did. She didn't do these 305 00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:24,480 Speaker 3: things because she was a busy woman. She didn't do 306 00:17:24,560 --> 00:17:29,280 Speaker 3: them to rack up the achievement of being the husshole culture. 307 00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:33,040 Speaker 3: She had to be responsible to make sure everything, not 308 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:37,840 Speaker 3: just in her household, but everything she did was a 309 00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:40,520 Speaker 3: faithful walking out of what God had called her to 310 00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:44,640 Speaker 3: in her season. And so as a manager, as a businesswoman, 311 00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:49,040 Speaker 3: as the mom, as a wife, as a gardener, as 312 00:17:49,119 --> 00:17:53,720 Speaker 3: a woman who loved God, she was very prudent. She 313 00:17:53,920 --> 00:17:57,080 Speaker 3: was very resourceful, and she was a good steward. She 314 00:17:57,160 --> 00:18:00,359 Speaker 3: knew the importance of interdependence because people were to on 315 00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:04,399 Speaker 3: her for a lot of their safety and livelihood. She 316 00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:07,280 Speaker 3: knew when to stop, she knew when to go. So 317 00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:10,480 Speaker 3: I guess that's the example I would encourage to people 318 00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:13,000 Speaker 3: to go back to. But look through the lens of 319 00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:17,359 Speaker 3: skills that really are the important human skills that we 320 00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:22,920 Speaker 3: lose often when we let whatever is most demanding and 321 00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:26,640 Speaker 3: more shiny and glittery entices us to think we need 322 00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:29,000 Speaker 3: to have. And just remind her that in the Garden 323 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:33,679 Speaker 3: of Eden, that serpent was a shiny animal. It was sparkly, 324 00:18:34,119 --> 00:18:37,960 Speaker 3: and that's what drew Eve's attention to the enemy. It 325 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:42,680 Speaker 3: was not that he presented himself and was ugly a snake. No, 326 00:18:42,920 --> 00:18:47,680 Speaker 3: he was something shiny and inviting. And when we let 327 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:51,600 Speaker 3: what is shiny and inviting and quick and sparkly and 328 00:18:51,720 --> 00:18:55,120 Speaker 3: here and now invite us, or entices us away from 329 00:18:55,160 --> 00:18:57,840 Speaker 3: what God has really called us to do in our season, 330 00:18:58,000 --> 00:18:59,359 Speaker 3: then we get in trouble. 331 00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:01,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, he was pleasing to the A. And I think 332 00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:04,520 Speaker 2: so much of what draws us is pleasing to the A. 333 00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:07,160 Speaker 2: And it can be confusing. And I know you're also 334 00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:11,119 Speaker 2: a counselor, and some I'm just interested in the people 335 00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:14,320 Speaker 2: that you counsel. What is the most common challenge that 336 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:18,160 Speaker 2: you experience them having to deal with, and then how 337 00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:21,440 Speaker 2: do you encourage them and guide them to lead and 338 00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:26,000 Speaker 2: more uncomplicated life. Let's take a brief break to hear 339 00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:27,760 Speaker 2: a word from our sponsor, and then we're going to 340 00:19:27,760 --> 00:19:29,040 Speaker 2: continue our conversation. 341 00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:33,919 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think again. Another piece that drove me to 342 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:37,679 Speaker 3: really rite uncomplicated was something I started noticing even before 343 00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:41,119 Speaker 3: the pandemic. But I started realizing that in the counseling office, 344 00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:46,280 Speaker 3: people were lacking common sense and they were lacking basic 345 00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:49,520 Speaker 3: problem solving skills. And it was really alarming to me 346 00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:53,720 Speaker 3: because it was something that you would expect working with 347 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:57,760 Speaker 3: people in crisis, people who you were working with in trauma, 348 00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,720 Speaker 3: and that was not the case of I was working 349 00:20:00,760 --> 00:20:03,000 Speaker 3: with at that time. When you're a therapist and you 350 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:05,480 Speaker 3: speak at retreats or things like that, a lot of 351 00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:08,280 Speaker 3: people come up and share their stories, they'll ask advice. 352 00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:09,440 Speaker 1: And I started. 353 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:13,240 Speaker 3: Realizing that we were we as a culture, were lacking 354 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:17,760 Speaker 3: basic problem solving skills, and we were also lacking the 355 00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:22,359 Speaker 3: middle way as far as balanced thinking, balanced approaches to 356 00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:25,760 Speaker 3: answer problems that come up in life. Because people were 357 00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:31,400 Speaker 3: thinking either fatalistically or idealistically and it wasn't just one generation. 358 00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:34,520 Speaker 3: I think that's the other piece is that it wasn't 359 00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:37,640 Speaker 3: just younger women who were thinking that way, but it 360 00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:40,320 Speaker 3: was women across the board. And I think that's kind 361 00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:42,640 Speaker 3: of when I realized that we need to get back 362 00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:45,320 Speaker 3: to the basics of humanity. We need to get back 363 00:20:45,320 --> 00:20:47,840 Speaker 3: to the basics of these base of common skills, such 364 00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:51,080 Speaker 3: as problem solving. We need to not over complicate things. 365 00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:55,040 Speaker 3: And then just also anxiety. There's so much anxiety because 366 00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:57,119 Speaker 3: we're so afraid we're going to make the wrong answer. 367 00:20:57,520 --> 00:21:02,880 Speaker 3: We're so afraid about what might happen. And the example 368 00:21:02,920 --> 00:21:06,480 Speaker 3: that I give is this principle that cows have to 369 00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:09,440 Speaker 3: be milked. That there was one time in my early 370 00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:13,840 Speaker 3: marriage where one of our neighbors milking facilities was damaged 371 00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:15,679 Speaker 3: in a tornado and they had to figure out how 372 00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:17,679 Speaker 3: to milk one hundred and forty cows. We had a 373 00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:20,640 Speaker 3: facility where we were milking our hundred forty cows about 374 00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:23,000 Speaker 3: a mile down the road, and my brother in laws 375 00:21:23,080 --> 00:21:25,600 Speaker 3: just said, they can milk them here, we'll figure it out. 376 00:21:25,680 --> 00:21:27,680 Speaker 3: They didn't come up with a ten point plan before 377 00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:30,320 Speaker 3: they started hauling those cows down to our barn. They 378 00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:33,960 Speaker 3: had to be shipped, like within hours shipped, they had 379 00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:37,199 Speaker 3: to be loaded up and carried over there. And that 380 00:21:37,359 --> 00:21:40,239 Speaker 3: was a principle that really struck me early on in 381 00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:44,040 Speaker 3: my young adult life is no matter what obstacles face us, 382 00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:49,840 Speaker 3: there's always a way out. And First Corinthians ten thirteen 383 00:21:50,359 --> 00:21:53,680 Speaker 3: gives us that example of no matter what comes our way, 384 00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:56,959 Speaker 3: God always provides a way out. And we have really 385 00:21:57,000 --> 00:22:01,320 Speaker 3: forgotten this human problem solving skill that God has created 386 00:22:01,359 --> 00:22:06,480 Speaker 3: our brains with that no matter what we experience, He 387 00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:10,760 Speaker 3: meaning God, gives us the resources to be able to 388 00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:15,000 Speaker 3: even if we need to decide the best next step. 389 00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:17,399 Speaker 3: Doesn't mean we're going to have everything planned out, but 390 00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:19,399 Speaker 3: it means that for the best next step, this is 391 00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:21,840 Speaker 3: what we're going to do. And then once we're able 392 00:22:21,880 --> 00:22:24,240 Speaker 3: to get our footing there, we can figure out the 393 00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:27,520 Speaker 3: next best steps. And I think the number one encouragement 394 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:30,520 Speaker 3: that I give my clients and people I work with 395 00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:33,080 Speaker 3: and I work with students now so I'm a K 396 00:22:33,240 --> 00:22:36,919 Speaker 3: through four elementary school counselor, also have time so I 397 00:22:36,960 --> 00:22:40,440 Speaker 3: help little's problems solve every day in very difficult situations 398 00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:42,880 Speaker 3: because they don't have control over what's happening at their home. 399 00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:44,320 Speaker 1: But I love. 400 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:48,040 Speaker 3: Encouraging people that we do have the resources to make 401 00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:51,879 Speaker 3: very wise sound decisions, even when we don't feel like 402 00:22:51,880 --> 00:22:55,280 Speaker 3: we do, because it's not about us. It's about the 403 00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:59,120 Speaker 3: capacity that God has given us with him to really 404 00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:01,720 Speaker 3: figure out the best answers for our problems. 405 00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,239 Speaker 2: As you've written this book and as you've explored all 406 00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:07,280 Speaker 2: of these different rhythms that you've talked about, is this 407 00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:10,199 Speaker 2: something that you've tried to add more into your life? 408 00:23:10,359 --> 00:23:12,000 Speaker 2: And I just would love to say, like it was 409 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:15,160 Speaker 2: there a before and after you know, like, Okay, I've 410 00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:17,440 Speaker 2: identified these and this is what I'm going to really 411 00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:20,199 Speaker 2: work towards. Or do you feel like that you've always 412 00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:21,879 Speaker 2: really embodied these traits? 413 00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:24,920 Speaker 3: So I think that's part of the Maybe the thing 414 00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:27,159 Speaker 3: I really want to share with people is that I 415 00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:30,280 Speaker 3: had someone ask me one time, like, are these lessons? 416 00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:31,760 Speaker 3: Are these like mindsets? 417 00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:32,440 Speaker 1: Are they behaviors? 418 00:23:32,480 --> 00:23:34,480 Speaker 3: I was like, no, Like, this is just how we live. 419 00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:35,400 Speaker 1: It's a lifestyle. 420 00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:37,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a lifestyle. It's a lifestyle where we don't 421 00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:40,719 Speaker 3: have all things figured out, like, but what you live 422 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:43,399 Speaker 3: is your priorities. And I think that's the bottom line. 423 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:47,159 Speaker 3: These ten things that I sifted through and thought about, 424 00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:52,400 Speaker 3: what are the things that what are ten things that 425 00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:57,240 Speaker 3: kind of need to be reintroduced to culture that were 426 00:23:57,920 --> 00:24:01,159 Speaker 3: that were commonly lived down past general that are also 427 00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:04,640 Speaker 3: still commonly lived out among the Amish, among those who 428 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:08,280 Speaker 3: live on farms, and that people come to and say, Okay, 429 00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:11,119 Speaker 3: I wish I knew how to do that. And I 430 00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:14,719 Speaker 3: started by just kind of doing some research on what 431 00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:16,840 Speaker 3: are the common things that people who grow up on 432 00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:19,560 Speaker 3: farms or who live a farm and lifestyles say that 433 00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:23,280 Speaker 3: they're grateful for. And a lot of them actually transferred 434 00:24:23,320 --> 00:24:27,240 Speaker 3: over into what the World Health Organization identified as basic 435 00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:30,040 Speaker 3: human life skills. And that's really what it comes down 436 00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:33,520 Speaker 3: to is that our lifestyles are all different around the world, 437 00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:38,520 Speaker 3: around the country, but basic human life skills have not changed. 438 00:24:38,760 --> 00:24:41,200 Speaker 3: And I think when you when you live on a farm, 439 00:24:41,600 --> 00:24:44,920 Speaker 3: you're forced to have to still keep these life skills 440 00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:49,119 Speaker 3: that don't change, like shifting sands, because you do the 441 00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:51,720 Speaker 3: same things day in and day out, no matter what 442 00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:55,520 Speaker 3: is happening outside in the world. Even in your personal life, 443 00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:56,879 Speaker 3: you still have to get up and you still have 444 00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,680 Speaker 3: to do certain things, just like raising kids. So as 445 00:24:59,760 --> 00:25:02,400 Speaker 3: we we're raising our kids. We have four kids, they 446 00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:06,399 Speaker 3: are all three years apart. We did at homeschool. We 447 00:25:06,440 --> 00:25:09,480 Speaker 3: don't live what now would be considered a homestead lifestyle. 448 00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:13,440 Speaker 3: We were farmers. It's just what we did. Our kids 449 00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:15,960 Speaker 3: were all in high school sports, they were in college sports. 450 00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:19,240 Speaker 3: I've been a professional woman for over twenty years. My 451 00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:23,200 Speaker 3: husband's worked both managed a farm, plus top public school, 452 00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:25,080 Speaker 3: and our kids went to public school, so we didn't 453 00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:27,600 Speaker 3: shelter our kids. So I've been a career woman and 454 00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:31,679 Speaker 3: we haven't changed anything. It's just that you're always having 455 00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:37,119 Speaker 3: to really filter what's most important and really live that 456 00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:40,800 Speaker 3: out because maybe we've been a little bit more resistant 457 00:25:40,880 --> 00:25:44,919 Speaker 3: to some of the fads that come your way that 458 00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:48,320 Speaker 3: kind of maybe can get you sidetracked from your values 459 00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:52,240 Speaker 3: because there's not much capacity for fads because we kind 460 00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:55,280 Speaker 3: of test them. Is this something that is really going 461 00:25:55,320 --> 00:25:57,120 Speaker 3: to be helpful for me to put into my life, 462 00:25:57,440 --> 00:25:59,800 Speaker 3: then it's going to be more of a lifestyle choice 463 00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:02,160 Speaker 3: versus I'm just going to do it because that's what's 464 00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:05,520 Speaker 3: popular now, it's what everyone's doing. I think in the lifestyle, 465 00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:09,040 Speaker 3: we've had more of that of a farming life. Cell 466 00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:12,879 Speaker 3: you don't take new things on into your life until 467 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:15,600 Speaker 3: you've vetted them for a little bit and kind of 468 00:26:15,640 --> 00:26:18,520 Speaker 3: watch them and see again. Kind of that prudence is, 469 00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:20,800 Speaker 3: this is this new thing that's coming our way, is 470 00:26:20,840 --> 00:26:23,840 Speaker 3: it really helpful? And if it is okay, so then 471 00:26:23,880 --> 00:26:27,280 Speaker 3: I'm gonna open the door and make that investment. Or 472 00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:30,359 Speaker 3: as a mom, that's kind of what I watched for, 473 00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:32,760 Speaker 3: especially as an educator. I used to teach high school, 474 00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:35,920 Speaker 3: high school even before I was a therapist, So when 475 00:26:35,960 --> 00:26:40,000 Speaker 3: I would see things coming down the pike, technology fads, 476 00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:42,919 Speaker 3: different things. I was teaching high schoolers before my own 477 00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:45,320 Speaker 3: kids were in high school, so I just kind of 478 00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:47,399 Speaker 3: learned to vet things a little bit. I think that's 479 00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:50,679 Speaker 3: very biblical. I think God tells us to you know, 480 00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:54,760 Speaker 3: to watch first before we do. And I think also 481 00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:58,880 Speaker 3: just filtering things through a biblical principles, and those biblical 482 00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:03,160 Speaker 3: principles really is what I raised my kids through who 483 00:27:03,240 --> 00:27:08,360 Speaker 3: lived all four of them lived in different cultures regarding technology. 484 00:27:08,680 --> 00:27:11,480 Speaker 3: So when my oldest was in high school, cell phones 485 00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:14,400 Speaker 3: were first coming out, they were more of a luxury. 486 00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:17,960 Speaker 3: When my last one left high school, you know, everyone 487 00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:21,080 Speaker 3: had a smartphone in their hand, and so we adapted 488 00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:26,159 Speaker 3: to the new technology that was here to stay, but 489 00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:29,240 Speaker 3: we also filtered what that looked like in our family 490 00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:32,639 Speaker 3: according to the biblical principles that we held as a family. 491 00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:33,080 Speaker 1: Yeah. 492 00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:37,320 Speaker 2: God has given us discernment and wisdom, and he will 493 00:27:37,359 --> 00:27:40,480 Speaker 2: guide us, and he will counsel us to make good 494 00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:43,200 Speaker 2: choices and give us the discipline and that we need 495 00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:46,480 Speaker 2: to set boundaries. Their boundaries are for our good and 496 00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:50,719 Speaker 2: for our benefit. And so as women are listening to 497 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:53,760 Speaker 2: this podcast and reading your book, what do you hope 498 00:27:53,800 --> 00:27:54,120 Speaker 2: for them? 499 00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:56,639 Speaker 3: Yeah? I hope that they know they can live a 500 00:27:56,760 --> 00:28:01,359 Speaker 3: vibrant life without selling their soul to what the world 501 00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:04,000 Speaker 3: says we have to do. I mean, I think that 502 00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:08,520 Speaker 3: maybe that's kind of harsh, but I think with technology 503 00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:12,159 Speaker 3: and all that it distracts us from. 504 00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:12,720 Speaker 1: There is. 505 00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:18,040 Speaker 3: A big movement even in the secular world, with John 506 00:28:18,119 --> 00:28:21,520 Speaker 3: Height and his new book called The Anxious Generation, is 507 00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:26,720 Speaker 3: fighting for humanity and for childhood and fighting for the 508 00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:30,360 Speaker 3: way that God has created us to be as human beings. 509 00:28:30,880 --> 00:28:33,320 Speaker 3: I want women to know they can have a balanced life. 510 00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:36,439 Speaker 3: They don't have to give up everything in order to 511 00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:39,800 Speaker 3: have what they want. I think that's the bottom line. 512 00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:43,600 Speaker 3: I have witnessed women in my culture, whether they're Amish 513 00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:46,680 Speaker 3: men and I or not any of those things. But 514 00:28:46,800 --> 00:28:51,200 Speaker 3: I've witnessed women live vibrant, exciting lives where they are 515 00:28:51,240 --> 00:28:55,560 Speaker 3: influential to so many people, and they don't bend to 516 00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:59,960 Speaker 3: every whim that comes along. But they're also not high 517 00:29:00,240 --> 00:29:05,000 Speaker 3: under a doormat and living a sheltered, drab, sad life. 518 00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:07,800 Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, I think that makes a lot of sense. 519 00:29:07,800 --> 00:29:10,760 Speaker 2: And I think today's conversation will cause everybody to be 520 00:29:10,840 --> 00:29:14,080 Speaker 2: introspective and to take inventory of what their life looks like, 521 00:29:14,160 --> 00:29:17,520 Speaker 2: how they're spending their time in some of our own 522 00:29:17,560 --> 00:29:21,120 Speaker 2: lifestyle rhythms, and so I think that it's been really valuable. 523 00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:23,320 Speaker 2: As we start to come to close. One of the 524 00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:26,160 Speaker 2: questions I've been asking all of my guests is is 525 00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:29,880 Speaker 2: there a biblical concept of love that you think applies 526 00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:31,160 Speaker 2: to this topic today. 527 00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:34,440 Speaker 3: Well, the biblical concept of love I think I'm going 528 00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:39,360 Speaker 3: to share is interdependence, which is one of the chapters. 529 00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:43,120 Speaker 3: But I look at the Trinity when I think about interdependence. 530 00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:47,040 Speaker 3: God loves us so much that he desires a reciprocal 531 00:29:47,120 --> 00:29:52,400 Speaker 3: relationship with us, and that community and reciprocity is so important, 532 00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:55,680 Speaker 3: and God models that for us. He loves us so 533 00:29:55,880 --> 00:30:00,600 Speaker 3: much that he desires us to be in fut fellowship 534 00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:04,960 Speaker 3: and communion with him, not just him giving to us. 535 00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:09,720 Speaker 3: And so his example of modeling of interdependence through the 536 00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:13,360 Speaker 3: Holy Spirit, through the Father, through the Son is just 537 00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:17,160 Speaker 3: what he desires for our relationship with him and also 538 00:30:18,000 --> 00:30:22,520 Speaker 3: our relationship than with others, which makes us more other 539 00:30:22,640 --> 00:30:24,280 Speaker 3: centered rather than self centered. 540 00:30:24,400 --> 00:30:28,040 Speaker 2: Absolutely, well, Brenda, is there something that you are loving 541 00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:28,640 Speaker 2: right now? 542 00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:31,320 Speaker 3: I am loving my job. My job is an elementary 543 00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:35,240 Speaker 3: school counselor working at K through four building. I absolutely 544 00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:39,000 Speaker 3: love it. This year it is difficult, but I don't 545 00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:42,600 Speaker 3: know what is different about this year, but I love 546 00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,000 Speaker 3: what I'm doing. And that's a gift right now. 547 00:30:45,160 --> 00:30:47,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, the amount of lives you can touch on a 548 00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:51,320 Speaker 2: daily basis, I mean, it's just staggering. I'm sure the 549 00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:53,760 Speaker 2: different stories that you hear and the people that you're 550 00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:57,200 Speaker 2: able to help, and then that affects future generations. So 551 00:30:57,840 --> 00:31:00,840 Speaker 2: I think that that is certainly something that is to 552 00:31:00,920 --> 00:31:02,480 Speaker 2: be valued and grateful for. 553 00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:04,200 Speaker 1: I know I want to stay connected with you. 554 00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:06,440 Speaker 2: I'm sure listeners want to stay connected with you, So 555 00:31:06,560 --> 00:31:07,760 Speaker 2: tell us how we can best do that. 556 00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:10,760 Speaker 3: Sure they can do that through my website and my newsletter, 557 00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:13,960 Speaker 3: Brendayoda dot com. They can also join me on Instagram 558 00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:18,240 Speaker 3: at Brenda Yoda Speaks. I'm also on Facebook at Brandiyoda Speaker, 559 00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:21,840 Speaker 3: and then I'm co host Midlife Mom's podcast with my 560 00:31:21,920 --> 00:31:24,440 Speaker 3: friend Amelia Rose. They can find us there too. 561 00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:27,440 Speaker 2: That's a really good example of you are a busy woman. 562 00:31:27,800 --> 00:31:31,560 Speaker 2: You're writing, you're podcasting, you're a mother, you're a farmer, 563 00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:35,040 Speaker 2: you're a teacher, you're a counselor. You wear many hats 564 00:31:35,080 --> 00:31:37,560 Speaker 2: and so I think, to your point, circling back to 565 00:31:37,600 --> 00:31:40,920 Speaker 2: the beginning of our conversation, just because life isn't complicated 566 00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:44,400 Speaker 2: doesn't mean that it's simple or not busy. It almost 567 00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:47,280 Speaker 2: feels like it's a is it a perspective, a mindset 568 00:31:47,320 --> 00:31:50,160 Speaker 2: shift that then shapes maybe the pace in which you 569 00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:53,040 Speaker 2: live your life because you're still very busy and accomplishing 570 00:31:53,040 --> 00:31:53,680 Speaker 2: a lot in a day. 571 00:31:53,720 --> 00:31:54,959 Speaker 1: I'd love for you to speak on that. 572 00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:57,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's more of two things. One is 573 00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:01,640 Speaker 3: values clarification, like what what are the values driving what 574 00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:05,040 Speaker 3: you're doing right now? And then the other one is 575 00:32:05,720 --> 00:32:09,400 Speaker 3: just a constant connection with the Lord, but knowing that 576 00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:12,600 Speaker 3: every season is different. So just for example, I'm a 577 00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:15,280 Speaker 3: grandma also, and my adult kids all live out of 578 00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:17,959 Speaker 3: the area, so I travel more. So I'm speaking less 579 00:32:18,200 --> 00:32:20,200 Speaker 3: and I'm traveling more to visit my kids. I do 580 00:32:20,280 --> 00:32:23,040 Speaker 3: not want to be gone. If they say we're going 581 00:32:23,080 --> 00:32:25,840 Speaker 3: to come home this weekend, that is my number one priority. 582 00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:30,320 Speaker 3: So I actually said no to about three speaking invitations 583 00:32:30,560 --> 00:32:33,360 Speaker 3: in the last week for next year because we have 584 00:32:33,440 --> 00:32:35,880 Speaker 3: a wedding next year, and my only daughter's getting married 585 00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:38,440 Speaker 3: next year. I have two new grandkids that are coming 586 00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:42,040 Speaker 3: and they're my number one priority. So I think it's 587 00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:45,360 Speaker 3: that in your season of life, just no, life is 588 00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:47,440 Speaker 3: not a race, and so if you're in the season 589 00:32:47,480 --> 00:32:50,680 Speaker 3: of raising kids that that is so full. But it 590 00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:54,600 Speaker 3: also means that you can be putting things in place 591 00:32:54,800 --> 00:32:58,040 Speaker 3: and making small steps for the big things you maybe 592 00:32:58,080 --> 00:33:00,480 Speaker 3: want to do. That's why the compelling part of living 593 00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:03,800 Speaker 3: in a complicated life is so important is that it's 594 00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:06,240 Speaker 3: not a laid back life, but it's a life that 595 00:33:06,400 --> 00:33:10,360 Speaker 3: where you are constantly assessing. Sometimes that's weekly, sometimes that's 596 00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:13,360 Speaker 3: every quarter, sometimes that's every year. I call it right 597 00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:16,200 Speaker 3: sizing your life, cutting things out of your life that 598 00:33:16,240 --> 00:33:18,479 Speaker 3: you used to do. That don't fit into your current season, 599 00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:21,640 Speaker 3: and then putting into your life what you really want 600 00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:23,160 Speaker 3: your season of life to be about. 601 00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:25,720 Speaker 1: That's a great distinction and a great way to end. 602 00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:28,640 Speaker 2: And so I just thank you so much for being 603 00:33:28,680 --> 00:33:30,960 Speaker 2: my guest today and would be honored if you would 604 00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:32,280 Speaker 2: pray for us as we close. 605 00:33:32,560 --> 00:33:36,000 Speaker 3: Okay, Father, I thank you so much for Rachel. I 606 00:33:36,080 --> 00:33:39,400 Speaker 3: thank you for her community and for every woman who 607 00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:42,440 Speaker 3: is here listening. I just ask Lord that you would 608 00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:46,840 Speaker 3: help her to sharpen the voice of you in her 609 00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:49,800 Speaker 3: ear to be able to know what she should be 610 00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:53,080 Speaker 3: about in her life in this current season, and that 611 00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:56,320 Speaker 3: she knows that she is influencing those around her where 612 00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:58,680 Speaker 3: you've placed her. Right now, I just pray that you 613 00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:01,440 Speaker 3: would help her to know that a full life is 614 00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:04,520 Speaker 3: not necessarily a busy life, but a full life is 615 00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:07,200 Speaker 3: one where she is doing what you have called her 616 00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:12,960 Speaker 3: to to her capacity, but then also feeling content and satisfied. 617 00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:15,319 Speaker 3: To be able to know that today's no is not 618 00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:19,239 Speaker 3: a no to tomorrow, but it is about living her 619 00:34:19,320 --> 00:34:23,279 Speaker 3: best life grounded in your truths and your values for 620 00:34:23,320 --> 00:34:25,440 Speaker 3: her in this season, Lord, I just asked that you 621 00:34:25,440 --> 00:34:28,279 Speaker 3: would equip each one of us to know who you 622 00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:32,279 Speaker 3: are and what should what we should be about, and 623 00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:35,160 Speaker 3: that you would help us to rest in that space. 624 00:34:35,440 --> 00:34:38,520 Speaker 3: And that resting is not it's not giving up, it's 625 00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:42,279 Speaker 3: not sleeping, but it's being content and satisfied with who 626 00:34:42,320 --> 00:34:44,640 Speaker 3: you are and what you've given us in this season. 627 00:34:44,920 --> 00:34:46,440 Speaker 3: I pray this in Jesus' name. Meme. 628 00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:50,160 Speaker 2: Thank you for tuning in to today's episode of the 629 00:34:50,200 --> 00:34:53,880 Speaker 2: Love Offering Podcast. I hope you realize how beloved you 630 00:34:54,040 --> 00:34:57,640 Speaker 2: are and then love others as God has first loved you. 631 00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:01,919 Speaker 2: I'd love to connect with you online at Rachelkadams dot 632 00:35:01,960 --> 00:35:06,160 Speaker 2: com or on socials at Rachel Adams author. There I 633 00:35:06,239 --> 00:35:09,560 Speaker 2: share more about my life and resources I think you'll love. 634 00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:12,480 Speaker 2: Be sure to sign up for the weekly Love Offering 635 00:35:12,640 --> 00:35:15,399 Speaker 2: newsletter and take a look at the free resources I've 636 00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:17,000 Speaker 2: created with you in mind. 637 00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:19,799 Speaker 1: Most recently added is. 638 00:35:19,800 --> 00:35:24,680 Speaker 2: My new devotional, Everyday Prayers for Love, Learning to Love God, others, 639 00:35:24,800 --> 00:35:28,880 Speaker 2: and even yourself, available anywhere books are sold. You'll also 640 00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:32,080 Speaker 2: want to take the what makes you Love a Book 641 00:35:32,120 --> 00:35:35,600 Speaker 2: quiz while you're there again. All of that information can 642 00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:39,279 Speaker 2: be found at Rachelkaadams dot com. Before we go, I 643 00:35:39,320 --> 00:35:41,279 Speaker 2: want to take just a second to thank the team 644 00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:44,480 Speaker 2: at Life Audio for their partnership with us on this podcast. 645 00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:47,879 Speaker 2: If you go to lifeaudio dot com you will find 646 00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:52,319 Speaker 2: dozens of other faith centered podcasts in their network. They've 647 00:35:52,360 --> 00:35:57,040 Speaker 2: got shows about prayer, Bible study, parenting, and more. Join 648 00:35:57,120 --> 00:36:01,080 Speaker 2: me again next week for another great conversation, but until then, 649 00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,640 Speaker 2: remember to always lead with love.