1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:08,400 Speaker 1: Life audio. It's one thing to understand the kind of 2 00:00:08,480 --> 00:00:12,520 Speaker 1: leadership that helps people flourish. It's another thing to live it, 3 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:17,520 Speaker 1: especially over time. Most of us know what matters. We 4 00:00:17,640 --> 00:00:22,080 Speaker 1: know the importance of patience, presence, and care. But when 5 00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:26,400 Speaker 1: pressure rises, when we're tired, when things are unclear, when 6 00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:30,480 Speaker 1: results are slow, it's easy to find ourselves slipping back 7 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:36,680 Speaker 1: into urgency, control or simply trying harder, which raises a 8 00:00:36,720 --> 00:00:42,360 Speaker 1: deeper question, what kind of life in us can actually 9 00:00:42,440 --> 00:00:46,559 Speaker 1: sustain the kind of leadership we long to offer. In 10 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:50,120 Speaker 1: this episode, I want to explore the inner work of leadership, 11 00:00:50,159 --> 00:00:53,640 Speaker 1: the kind of character that is formed over time, and 12 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:56,760 Speaker 1: the kind of reflection that helps us grow in wisdom 13 00:00:57,160 --> 00:01:01,400 Speaker 1: as we stay with our work the break, I'll continue 14 00:01:01,440 --> 00:01:05,040 Speaker 1: by sharing a passage from Wendell Berry that helps name 15 00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:17,560 Speaker 1: this deeper ground. Hello friends, I'm Alan Faddling, and you're 16 00:01:17,600 --> 00:01:21,080 Speaker 1: listening to the Unhurried Living podcast, where we inspire you 17 00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:26,200 Speaker 1: to rest deeper, live fuller, and lead better. Before we begin. 18 00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:29,360 Speaker 1: If you find this podcast helpful, i'd encourage you to 19 00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:33,039 Speaker 1: subscribe wherever you happen to listen. It's a simple way 20 00:01:33,080 --> 00:01:37,880 Speaker 1: to help these conversations reach other leaders like you. In 21 00:01:37,959 --> 00:01:41,760 Speaker 1: our last episode, we reflected on the kind of life 22 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:45,280 Speaker 1: we're called to tend in our leadership, the kind of 23 00:01:45,319 --> 00:01:50,400 Speaker 1: fruitfulness that grows slowly over time. And if you're anything 24 00:01:50,560 --> 00:01:54,360 Speaker 1: like me, you may already feel how difficult that kind 25 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:59,600 Speaker 1: of work can be to sustain. Wendell Berry helps us 26 00:01:59,640 --> 00:02:02,680 Speaker 1: see the kind of life we are meant to tend 27 00:02:03,320 --> 00:02:07,240 Speaker 1: and the kind of fruitfulness that grows slowly over time. 28 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:12,200 Speaker 1: But he doesn't stop there. He turns our attention to 29 00:02:12,360 --> 00:02:17,679 Speaker 1: something closer, in, something much more personal, because even when 30 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:21,520 Speaker 1: we understand the nature of this work, there's still a 31 00:02:21,639 --> 00:02:26,680 Speaker 1: question that remains. What kind of person can stay with 32 00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:31,080 Speaker 1: work like this? What sort of inner life is needed 33 00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:36,240 Speaker 1: to sustain this kind of patient, attentive care over the 34 00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:41,480 Speaker 1: long haul. Barry suggests that good intentions and even good 35 00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:46,400 Speaker 1: understanding are not quite enough. There is something deeper that 36 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:50,679 Speaker 1: must be formed within us, something that can hold steady 37 00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:56,320 Speaker 1: when the work is slow, when progress is unclear, when 38 00:02:56,360 --> 00:03:01,600 Speaker 1: the temptation to hurry returns. So let me now read 39 00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:05,640 Speaker 1: a passage from Wendleberry where he begins to name that 40 00:03:05,919 --> 00:03:12,000 Speaker 1: deeper ground. He says, to live on the hillside and 41 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:16,560 Speaker 1: to use it without diminishing its fertility or wasting it 42 00:03:16,639 --> 00:03:23,399 Speaker 1: by erosion still require conscious intention and information. But now 43 00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:29,000 Speaker 1: we must say good intention and good that is, correct 44 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:35,520 Speaker 1: information resulting in good work. And to these we must 45 00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:41,160 Speaker 1: now add character, the sort of knowledge that might properly 46 00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:46,800 Speaker 1: be called familiarity, and the affections and habits and values 47 00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:51,920 Speaker 1: and virtues conscious and unconscious, that would preserve good care 48 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:59,120 Speaker 1: and good work through our times. Now, Wendelberry, in our 49 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:02,360 Speaker 1: last Monel invited us to tend the kind of life 50 00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:07,000 Speaker 1: that grows slowly over time. This passage brings that same 51 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:10,440 Speaker 1: question a bit closer to home, because if this is 52 00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:13,000 Speaker 1: the kind of work we are given, the work of 53 00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:17,960 Speaker 1: cultivating life, caring for souls, of stewarding something that cannot 54 00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:22,320 Speaker 1: be rushed well, then the question becomes this, who do 55 00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:27,000 Speaker 1: I need to become to do this kind of work? Well? 56 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:32,400 Speaker 1: Barry adds another layer here that invites reflection. It's not 57 00:04:32,720 --> 00:04:36,520 Speaker 1: enough to mean well, nor is it enough to know 58 00:04:36,640 --> 00:04:40,760 Speaker 1: the right things to do. Good work, he says, flows 59 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:44,600 Speaker 1: from good intention and correct understanding. But it doesn't end there. 60 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,920 Speaker 1: It must be carried by something deeper, and he calls 61 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:52,839 Speaker 1: this character. He describes it as a kind of knowing 62 00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:58,359 Speaker 1: that grows into familiarity, and a way of being shaped 63 00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:03,080 Speaker 1: by affections and habits that can endure strain. It's a 64 00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:08,839 Speaker 1: kind of quiet resiliency. I notice how easily I can 65 00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:13,400 Speaker 1: rely on intention and insight. I can want what is good, 66 00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:17,440 Speaker 1: I can even learn what is wise. But in moments 67 00:05:17,440 --> 00:05:24,520 Speaker 1: of pressure, fatigue, conflict, disappointment, those alone do not always hold. 68 00:05:24,560 --> 00:05:30,280 Speaker 1: They're not enough. Something more settled is needed, something that 69 00:05:30,360 --> 00:05:34,719 Speaker 1: has been formed slowly enough to remain when my conditions 70 00:05:34,760 --> 00:05:40,800 Speaker 1: are not ideal, something like good character. Now Barri's word 71 00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:45,279 Speaker 1: for this is familiarity, and it lingers with me. This 72 00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:49,719 Speaker 1: is the knowledge that comes from staying from walking the 73 00:05:49,839 --> 00:05:53,640 Speaker 1: same ground long enough that it is no longer an 74 00:05:53,640 --> 00:05:57,720 Speaker 1: object to be managed, but a place to which I belong. 75 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:02,040 Speaker 1: In leadership, this feel like knowing people in places from 76 00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:06,640 Speaker 1: the inside rather than just from a distance. Not just 77 00:06:06,720 --> 00:06:12,200 Speaker 1: strategies applied, but lives shared. Not just outcomes pursued, but 78 00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:18,039 Speaker 1: relationships in which I find myself at home. And then 79 00:06:18,240 --> 00:06:25,159 Speaker 1: there are the quieter forces he names affections, habits, values, virtues. 80 00:06:25,240 --> 00:06:30,520 Speaker 1: These form the inner architecture of our lives. And again, 81 00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:34,800 Speaker 1: these are not built quickly nor are they easily improvised 82 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:38,880 Speaker 1: when needed in a moment. They are cultivated over time, 83 00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:44,000 Speaker 1: often unnoticed, until they become the very way we respond 84 00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:47,800 Speaker 1: when we are tired or tested. They run much deeper 85 00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:52,520 Speaker 1: than managing appearances in the moment. Maybe this is what 86 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:57,080 Speaker 1: sustains the kind of fertility we spoke of earlier, not 87 00:06:57,240 --> 00:07:01,040 Speaker 1: just resolve, but a life that has been shaped to 88 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:05,600 Speaker 1: love what is good and to return to it, almost instinctively, 89 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:10,960 Speaker 1: even under strain. It makes me wonder what in me 90 00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:16,640 Speaker 1: has been formed deeply enough to last, and it invites 91 00:07:16,680 --> 00:07:20,320 Speaker 1: me again into a slower work, not just of doing 92 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:23,320 Speaker 1: what is right, but of becoming the kind of person 93 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:28,000 Speaker 1: for whom good work can endure. So what might this 94 00:07:28,280 --> 00:07:34,320 Speaker 1: look like in practice? Well, first practice small faithfulnesses when 95 00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:40,040 Speaker 1: no one else is watching. Character is rarely formed in 96 00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:45,080 Speaker 1: visible moments. It grows in the ordinary and often unseen 97 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:49,640 Speaker 1: choices we make each day, you know, telling the truth 98 00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:52,840 Speaker 1: when it would be much easier to soften it, or 99 00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:55,680 Speaker 1: keeping a commitment when it would be convenient to let 100 00:07:55,720 --> 00:08:00,840 Speaker 1: it slide, or responding with patients when irritate pation rises. 101 00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:05,360 Speaker 1: These are small things, but over time they become the 102 00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:09,080 Speaker 1: grain of our lives, and when pressure comes, we tend 103 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:14,480 Speaker 1: to act according to that grain. Now, second, let your 104 00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:20,680 Speaker 1: reactions become your teachers. Moments of fatigue or conflict or 105 00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:24,720 Speaker 1: disappointment have a way of revealing what has actually been 106 00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:29,160 Speaker 1: formed in us. And instead of resisting or explaining those 107 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:32,400 Speaker 1: reactions away, you know, that's that's not really me. You know, 108 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:38,679 Speaker 1: Instead we can learn from those reactions what just surfaced 109 00:08:38,679 --> 00:08:43,880 Speaker 1: in me in that moment of conflict or tension or stress. Well, 110 00:08:44,040 --> 00:08:46,600 Speaker 1: and what does that say about what I love and 111 00:08:46,640 --> 00:08:51,160 Speaker 1: what I fear or what I trust? That kind of 112 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:55,040 Speaker 1: honest noticing, brought gently before God becomes one of the 113 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:59,400 Speaker 1: ways that character is deepened. And again, not quickly, but 114 00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:06,079 Speaker 1: prof and genuinely, and over time, these small, steady practices 115 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:10,880 Speaker 1: begin to root something deeper in us, a kind of 116 00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:14,160 Speaker 1: life that can stay with the work long enough to 117 00:09:14,240 --> 00:09:19,080 Speaker 1: be shaped by it. Barry's final reflection helps us see 118 00:09:19,120 --> 00:09:23,040 Speaker 1: what happens when we do just that. Let me read 119 00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:28,840 Speaker 1: another passage from Wendell Berry. He says, correct discipline and 120 00:09:29,400 --> 00:09:34,320 Speaker 1: enough time are inseparable notions. Correct discipline cannot be hurried, 121 00:09:34,880 --> 00:09:37,400 Speaker 1: for it is both the knowledge of what ought to 122 00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:40,960 Speaker 1: be done and the willingness to do it, all of 123 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:45,720 Speaker 1: it properly. The good worker will not suppose that good 124 00:09:45,720 --> 00:09:49,880 Speaker 1: work can be made properly answerable to haste, urgency, or 125 00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:54,000 Speaker 1: even emergency. But the good worker knows too that after 126 00:09:54,320 --> 00:09:58,760 Speaker 1: it is done, work requires yet more time. To prove 127 00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:03,600 Speaker 1: its work. One must stay to experience and study and 128 00:10:03,760 --> 00:10:09,040 Speaker 1: understand the consequences, must understand them by living with them, 129 00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:13,640 Speaker 1: and then correct them, if necessary, by longer living and 130 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:18,920 Speaker 1: more work. Now there's a lot in what Barry says here, 131 00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:21,680 Speaker 1: but his words have a way of slowing me down. 132 00:10:21,760 --> 00:10:27,480 Speaker 1: He's speaking in part about the power of reflection, the 133 00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:31,200 Speaker 1: power of looking back, of staying with what has been 134 00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:36,600 Speaker 1: done long enough to understand it and its results. Now 135 00:10:36,679 --> 00:10:39,040 Speaker 1: I can feel how easily I assume that good work 136 00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:41,480 Speaker 1: can just be done quickly if I try hard enough. 137 00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:44,840 Speaker 1: And then there's this quiet pressure that I carry to 138 00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:48,439 Speaker 1: move things along, to get them done, and then in efficiency, 139 00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:52,920 Speaker 1: to move on to what is next and urgent. But 140 00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:56,920 Speaker 1: Barry here named something I know is true. Good work 141 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:02,120 Speaker 1: and hurried work are almost never the same thing. Again, 142 00:11:02,160 --> 00:11:05,160 Speaker 1: he calls it correct discipline, and as he describes it, 143 00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:08,400 Speaker 1: he says, it feels like a deeper kind of learning 144 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:12,520 Speaker 1: than I often settle for. It's not just knowing what 145 00:11:12,679 --> 00:11:15,880 Speaker 1: to do, but it's being willing to do it well 146 00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:20,200 Speaker 1: and to do it fully. There's a kind of integrity here. 147 00:11:20,240 --> 00:11:24,920 Speaker 1: It's a refusal to cut corners, even subtle ones. And 148 00:11:24,960 --> 00:11:28,360 Speaker 1: then there's the part that lingers with me most, staying 149 00:11:28,440 --> 00:11:33,640 Speaker 1: with the work long enough to understand its consequences. I 150 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,480 Speaker 1: notice how often I want to move on when something 151 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:38,960 Speaker 1: is done. I want to check the box, I want 152 00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:42,520 Speaker 1: to start doing the next thing. But Barry suggests that 153 00:11:42,559 --> 00:11:48,080 Speaker 1: the work's not quite finished when I am finished. It's 154 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:52,880 Speaker 1: meaning unfolds over time. Its impact reveals itself slowly, and 155 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:55,720 Speaker 1: if I don't pay attention to the outcomes of my work, 156 00:11:56,320 --> 00:12:00,520 Speaker 1: I may never really understand exactly what it is I'm 157 00:12:00,559 --> 00:12:05,360 Speaker 1: doing now. This is the quiet gift of reflection as 158 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:10,920 Speaker 1: a leadership practice. It's not analysis alone, but it's attention. 159 00:12:11,840 --> 00:12:15,320 Speaker 1: It's a willingness to return the notice and to listen 160 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:18,880 Speaker 1: for what is being revealed in the wake of our work. 161 00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:23,160 Speaker 1: You know, there's a kind of humility in this. There's 162 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:28,160 Speaker 1: a willingness to be taught by what comes after my effort. 163 00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:32,680 Speaker 1: We admit that we don't know fully in the moment 164 00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:35,040 Speaker 1: what we are doing, and that we need a little 165 00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:38,840 Speaker 1: more time and maybe God's help to see more clearly. 166 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:42,680 Speaker 1: It makes me wonder how much of my life I've 167 00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:46,280 Speaker 1: lived at a pace just too quick to learn wisdom 168 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:50,760 Speaker 1: from now. Maybe this is part of what it means 169 00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:55,600 Speaker 1: to enter into a long apprenticeship in kingdom. Reality not 170 00:12:55,720 --> 00:12:59,640 Speaker 1: reality as an idea, but reality is something I live 171 00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:05,199 Speaker 1: with and must learn from over time. It's an apprenticeship 172 00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:09,360 Speaker 1: where time is not an obstacle but a teacher, where 173 00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:14,680 Speaker 1: consequences and outcomes are not interruptions, but instruction. We're staying 174 00:13:14,840 --> 00:13:20,560 Speaker 1: becomes as important as starting. So again, as Wendleberry puts it, 175 00:13:20,720 --> 00:13:25,280 Speaker 1: correct discipline may be less about mastering my work and 176 00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:29,200 Speaker 1: more about allowing my work and its outcomes to shape me. 177 00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:35,200 Speaker 1: It feels less like control and more like a steady patient, 178 00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:39,560 Speaker 1: yielding to what is true. If that's so, then reflection 179 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:43,880 Speaker 1: is not an optional extra in leadership. It is actually 180 00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:49,040 Speaker 1: part of the work. It's the pathway of growing in wisdom. 181 00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:52,600 Speaker 1: If reflection truly belongs at the heart of our work, 182 00:13:52,720 --> 00:13:55,720 Speaker 1: then it helps to give it a simple place to 183 00:13:55,840 --> 00:14:00,880 Speaker 1: live in our days. Small, intentional moments where we learn 184 00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:05,000 Speaker 1: to look back before we move on. So here are 185 00:14:05,040 --> 00:14:08,320 Speaker 1: a couple of practical suggestions on what this might look 186 00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:13,240 Speaker 1: like in your leadership. So, first, take a moment to 187 00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:17,840 Speaker 1: return to something you've done before you move on. Maybe 188 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:20,400 Speaker 1: it's at the end of a meeting, or after you've 189 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:22,600 Speaker 1: made a decision, or at the end of your day. 190 00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:26,480 Speaker 1: Resist the urge to immediately shift to the next thing. 191 00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:30,680 Speaker 1: Just take a few moments to look back. Ask yourself 192 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:35,480 Speaker 1: some questions. What happened here, what seemed to come alive? 193 00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:40,760 Speaker 1: What felt off? You don't necessarily need full answers, but 194 00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:45,400 Speaker 1: even just the willingness to notice will teach you. Over time, 195 00:14:45,560 --> 00:14:49,920 Speaker 1: this kind of returning begins to form wisdom. Here's a 196 00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:55,440 Speaker 1: second suggestion. Let one outcome speak to you before you 197 00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:59,040 Speaker 1: evaluate it. What I mean by that is that you 198 00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:01,400 Speaker 1: know when something unf whether it feels like it went 199 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:06,000 Speaker 1: well or whether it went poorly. Pause before you label 200 00:15:06,080 --> 00:15:08,880 Speaker 1: it a success or a failure, Sit with it a little. 201 00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:14,520 Speaker 1: What is this revealing about our people, about our culture, 202 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:19,640 Speaker 1: about me, and about what I trust? Here? Reflection is 203 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:23,600 Speaker 1: less about judging the results and more about receiving them. 204 00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:27,400 Speaker 1: As teachers and sometimes it's better to start first in 205 00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:33,880 Speaker 1: gratitude before you move immediately to evaluation. So perhaps the 206 00:15:33,920 --> 00:15:37,680 Speaker 1: invitation here is a simple one. You don't have to 207 00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:41,080 Speaker 1: rush to become a different kind of leader overnight. You 208 00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:45,960 Speaker 1: don't have to force fruit or manufacture outcomes. Begin by 209 00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:49,880 Speaker 1: tending what gives life for you and for those you 210 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:54,160 Speaker 1: work with. Stay rooted in what is true. Give your 211 00:15:54,200 --> 00:16:00,040 Speaker 1: attention before you give your direction. Remain long enough to 212 00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:04,680 Speaker 1: learn from what unfolds. Trust that the deeper work, the 213 00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:09,640 Speaker 1: work of forming a life, a people, a place, is happening, 214 00:16:10,040 --> 00:16:14,360 Speaker 1: often unseen, and over time you may find that what 215 00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:18,760 Speaker 1: grows is not just better leadership, but a better kind 216 00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:26,680 Speaker 1: of life. Thank you for listening to the Unhurry Living podcast. 217 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:31,320 Speaker 1: To learn more about us, visit unhurryliving dot com. In 218 00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:34,800 Speaker 1: the show notes, you'll find helpful links and information about 219 00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:38,560 Speaker 1: our Partner Life Audio and all of their other faith 220 00:16:38,680 --> 00:16:39,880 Speaker 1: centered podcasts.