1 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:03,520 Speaker 1: Life Audio. 2 00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:08,560 Speaker 2: Welcome to the Love Offering Podcast. I'm your host, Rachel Adam's, 3 00:00:08,600 --> 00:00:11,399 Speaker 2: author of Everyday Prayers for Love, Learning to Love God, others, 4 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:14,680 Speaker 2: and even yourself. Each week we dive into meaningful conversations 5 00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:17,239 Speaker 2: about how to live out the greatest commandment, living God 6 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:19,479 Speaker 2: with all of our heart, soul, mind and strength, and 7 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:23,960 Speaker 2: loving our neighbors as ourselves, whether through inspiring stories, practical wisdom, 8 00:00:24,079 --> 00:00:26,479 Speaker 2: or biblical truth. My hope is to encourage you to 9 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:30,120 Speaker 2: love boldly, live faithfully, and reflect God's love in your 10 00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:33,479 Speaker 2: everyday life. Today, I'm honored to welcome Willow Weston to 11 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:36,800 Speaker 2: the show. Willow is an author, speaker, podcast host, and 12 00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:41,880 Speaker 2: the founder of Collide, a ministry impacting women nationwide through conferences, 13 00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:45,760 Speaker 2: Bible studies, and storytelling. Marked by honesty and hope, Willo 14 00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:48,240 Speaker 2: invites women to meet Jesus in the middle of their 15 00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:52,840 Speaker 2: mess and discover healing, freedom, and transformation. In her new book, 16 00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:56,800 Speaker 2: Collide Running into Healing When life hands you hurt, Willow 17 00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:59,880 Speaker 2: asks a powerful question, what if you'rre pain is the 18 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:03,240 Speaker 2: very place where healing begins. Through her own raw and 19 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:06,959 Speaker 2: redemptive story, she reminds us that Jesus doesn't avoid our brokenness. 20 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:10,120 Speaker 2: He runs straight into it, not to condemn us, but 21 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:14,040 Speaker 2: to walk with us and make us whole. Well, Hello Willow, 22 00:01:14,319 --> 00:01:17,040 Speaker 2: and welcome to the Love Offering Podcast. I'm so happy 23 00:01:17,080 --> 00:01:17,559 Speaker 2: to have you. 24 00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:20,959 Speaker 1: Hey, Rachel, this is so fun. We got to do 25 00:01:21,040 --> 00:01:23,200 Speaker 1: this on my podcast, and so it's so fun to 26 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:24,920 Speaker 1: be on yours. Thank you for having me. 27 00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:27,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's an honor to get to talk with you. 28 00:01:27,959 --> 00:01:29,679 Speaker 2: And I was telling you before we hit record. I 29 00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:31,959 Speaker 2: remember several years ago when I got to be a 30 00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:35,640 Speaker 2: guest on your podcast. We were talking about this very project, 31 00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:38,280 Speaker 2: and so it's so neat to see it come to fruition, 32 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,080 Speaker 2: and so I'm really happy for those that don't know 33 00:01:41,120 --> 00:01:43,640 Speaker 2: you yet to introduce you to them. 34 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:46,080 Speaker 1: And to hear more of your story. Thank you so much. 35 00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:49,080 Speaker 1: I'm happy to be on and chat with you. 36 00:01:49,320 --> 00:01:54,280 Speaker 2: So collide. Tell us when your life first collided with 37 00:01:54,680 --> 00:01:56,840 Speaker 2: the Lord. When did you first come to a relationship 38 00:01:56,880 --> 00:01:57,120 Speaker 2: with him? 39 00:01:57,320 --> 00:02:00,680 Speaker 1: Oh? Wow. I grew up in an ear really just home, 40 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:04,040 Speaker 1: didn't grow up going to church, and I was raised 41 00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:07,200 Speaker 1: by a single mom and had a mindset that was 42 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:10,239 Speaker 1: pretty negative about Jesus and Christians, and so I really 43 00:02:10,280 --> 00:02:14,680 Speaker 1: wanted nothing to do with Christianity. When I was in 44 00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:18,040 Speaker 1: my early twenties, I was going to college. My life 45 00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:22,760 Speaker 1: was falling apart. I had all of this unresolved baggage 46 00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:25,519 Speaker 1: and wounds for my childhood that I had never dealt with, 47 00:02:25,760 --> 00:02:30,040 Speaker 1: and it was really coming out sideways in my friendships, 48 00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:32,720 Speaker 1: in my ability to get up and go to class 49 00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:37,560 Speaker 1: and carry grades, carry relationships, carrying my life. I had 50 00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:40,840 Speaker 1: not only recognized I'd been really wounded by my parents, 51 00:02:40,919 --> 00:02:43,960 Speaker 1: but I also had now had the great capability of 52 00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:46,920 Speaker 1: wounding my own life and wounding other peoples. And I 53 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,840 Speaker 1: had this radical conversion when I was twenty one years old. 54 00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:53,080 Speaker 1: The Lord in a desperate place where I needed a 55 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:56,079 Speaker 1: place to live. Within a week or two, the Lord 56 00:02:56,320 --> 00:02:59,040 Speaker 1: put me in the basement of this Christian family's house 57 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:03,320 Speaker 1: and this and Cindy, who's so bold. She kept telling 58 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:06,200 Speaker 1: me about her Jesus, and I thought, oh, I'm only 59 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:09,560 Speaker 1: going to live here temporarily. She wanted me to. She said, 60 00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:11,040 Speaker 1: you can live here, but you can't party and you 61 00:03:11,080 --> 00:03:13,440 Speaker 1: can't have boys overnight. And I thought, that's the most 62 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:16,440 Speaker 1: archaic thing I've ever heard of in my entire life. 63 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:18,959 Speaker 1: I won't be here long because I'm not going to 64 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:22,040 Speaker 1: be able to pull that off. But she invited me 65 00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:26,359 Speaker 1: into her days and her life, and into her family 66 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:29,720 Speaker 1: and her small group and just invited me to begin 67 00:03:29,800 --> 00:03:32,240 Speaker 1: sharing my story. And it was the first time that 68 00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:35,600 Speaker 1: I even realized I had a story to share. And 69 00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:38,400 Speaker 1: I started opening up about things I had gone through 70 00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:40,640 Speaker 1: that I wasn't allowed to talk about as a kid. 71 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:43,080 Speaker 1: And as I was sharing my story, she began to 72 00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:45,920 Speaker 1: speak Jesus into my story. And it's such a long 73 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:49,400 Speaker 1: story about the day how I got to the day 74 00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:51,400 Speaker 1: I gave my life to Christ. But it was God 75 00:03:51,560 --> 00:03:54,600 Speaker 1: using that woman, pouring into my life, speaking into my 76 00:03:54,640 --> 00:03:58,160 Speaker 1: life and drawing me into hers and speaking Jesus into 77 00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:01,720 Speaker 1: me that truly led me all the way too. I 78 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:04,240 Speaker 1: remember the day I gave my life to Jesus like 79 00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:07,560 Speaker 1: I was just my hands were up and I was like, God, 80 00:04:07,560 --> 00:04:10,280 Speaker 1: I want to give you everything, like my past, my wounds, 81 00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:14,080 Speaker 1: my baggage, my dreams, my hopes, my body, my mind, 82 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:20,160 Speaker 1: my heart. You know, I handed him my life and 83 00:04:20,480 --> 00:04:23,720 Speaker 1: I've never been the same since. It's been amazing. So 84 00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:27,680 Speaker 1: obviously there's challenges and hard things, but He's with me 85 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:30,880 Speaker 1: and all of those So what point did you begin 86 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:34,200 Speaker 1: the collide ministry when you go from coming to know 87 00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:37,160 Speaker 1: Him as your Lord and Savior into this being your 88 00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:41,880 Speaker 1: whole life mission. Yeah. So I dove right into following Jesus. 89 00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:44,039 Speaker 1: I think the next week I drove to a church 90 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:48,520 Speaker 1: by myself, started getting involved. I'd never been a church 91 00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:51,600 Speaker 1: goer in my life, became a youth leader. Within weeks, 92 00:04:51,680 --> 00:04:53,800 Speaker 1: got invited to be a youth leader, and I'd not 93 00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:56,360 Speaker 1: been to a youth group I think, except for one 94 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:59,720 Speaker 1: visit one time. So started getting involved in service and 95 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:03,680 Speaker 1: besting in kids and leading Bible studies and reading Bob On, 96 00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:06,880 Speaker 1: growing in Lord and all these things. Was in vocational 97 00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:09,480 Speaker 1: ministry for several years, and then got pregnant with my 98 00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:12,719 Speaker 1: first kiddo and took a step back from a vocational ministry. 99 00:05:12,839 --> 00:05:16,000 Speaker 1: Had my second kid, and it was then that my mom, 100 00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:18,960 Speaker 1: who I hadn't lived with since I was fifteen years old, 101 00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:21,839 Speaker 1: I had to move out of my mom's as a kid, 102 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:24,880 Speaker 1: and another family took me in. And here my mom 103 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:28,000 Speaker 1: moves into town to be super grandma, and we had 104 00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:32,480 Speaker 1: all this baggage from addiction and neglect and abandonment that 105 00:05:32,520 --> 00:05:36,320 Speaker 1: we'd never dealt with and she was still a severe alcoholic, 106 00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:39,720 Speaker 1: and she knocked on my door one day and I 107 00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:43,240 Speaker 1: had my kiddo and Bella and I didn't know it 108 00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:44,520 Speaker 1: was her, and I went to the door to answer 109 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:46,560 Speaker 1: the door, and I saw her face and I just 110 00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:50,559 Speaker 1: flipped out, like I just couldn't let her into my house, 111 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:53,279 Speaker 1: and my life and all my childhood pain kind of 112 00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:56,719 Speaker 1: came flooding over me. And I ran upstairs and I 113 00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:59,440 Speaker 1: hid in a closet with Bella because I didn't want 114 00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:01,200 Speaker 1: my mom to know we were in there, and so 115 00:06:01,240 --> 00:06:04,200 Speaker 1: I just went as far away as I could so 116 00:06:04,240 --> 00:06:06,800 Speaker 1: she wouldn't hear us. And I had this moment where 117 00:06:06,839 --> 00:06:09,159 Speaker 1: the Lord was like, Willow, I've done a lot of 118 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,400 Speaker 1: healing in your life since you gave your life to me, 119 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:13,919 Speaker 1: but there's more to be done. Like you're hiding in 120 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:16,039 Speaker 1: a closet because of your pain, and now you're going 121 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:18,240 Speaker 1: to hurt your own daughter, and so you need to 122 00:06:18,279 --> 00:06:20,200 Speaker 1: come out and you need to get help. And so 123 00:06:20,279 --> 00:06:23,200 Speaker 1: that was this like crazy moment where I stepped out 124 00:06:23,200 --> 00:06:27,039 Speaker 1: of that closet ended up in a Christian therapist office 125 00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:31,000 Speaker 1: and it wasn't anything the therapist said, but I had 126 00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:34,120 Speaker 1: this sort of epiphany that and I just started talking 127 00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:36,400 Speaker 1: and seeing all these things I'd never heard before, and 128 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:39,360 Speaker 1: I was like, I was born into wounds. I collided 129 00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:42,680 Speaker 1: with my parents' wounds. They didn't get healing for their wounds, 130 00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:45,279 Speaker 1: and they wounded me. And now I might wound my kid, 131 00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:48,760 Speaker 1: and I'm desperate for healing. I'm in need of a 132 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:51,039 Speaker 1: new kind of collision. Like when you and I collide, 133 00:06:51,080 --> 00:06:53,479 Speaker 1: if we're wounded, we wound each other. But when I 134 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:56,240 Speaker 1: see Jesus in the New Testament, when he collides with people, 135 00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:59,880 Speaker 1: they're made more hole than broken. And so I paid 136 00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:02,239 Speaker 1: the lady her eighty five dollars and I was walking 137 00:07:02,279 --> 00:07:03,840 Speaker 1: to my car and the Lord said, I'm going to 138 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:07,840 Speaker 1: do something with these words wounded collision. I had no 139 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:10,920 Speaker 1: sense of what that was. I wasn't looking to start something. 140 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:13,080 Speaker 1: I was just siding in a closet. So I wasn't 141 00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:15,960 Speaker 1: in a good headspace. And within a week or two, 142 00:07:16,160 --> 00:07:19,760 Speaker 1: a college aged girl asked me if I would meant 143 00:07:19,760 --> 00:07:22,400 Speaker 1: to her. I said, I could meet with you and 144 00:07:22,440 --> 00:07:24,240 Speaker 1: we could look at Jesus in the New Testament, how 145 00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:26,440 Speaker 1: he runs into wounded people and what he does as 146 00:07:26,440 --> 00:07:29,760 Speaker 1: a result of it. And she I thought it was 147 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:32,280 Speaker 1: going to be her. She brought twenty five friends and 148 00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:35,800 Speaker 1: then long story short, Now we're like fourteen years later, 149 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:38,960 Speaker 1: and there's been thousands and thousands of women who have 150 00:07:39,080 --> 00:07:42,760 Speaker 1: now collided with Jesus and experienced his hope and healing 151 00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:45,200 Speaker 1: and purpose. And so I'm just the girl in the 152 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:48,440 Speaker 1: closet who needs Jesus to heal me. And I've invited 153 00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:51,080 Speaker 1: a few friends to come and man, have we experienced 154 00:07:51,120 --> 00:07:52,040 Speaker 1: the goodness of God? 155 00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:55,200 Speaker 2: Well, I'm so excited that you have invited us into 156 00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:56,920 Speaker 2: this story as well. But we're going to take a 157 00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:59,240 Speaker 2: brief break to hear a word from today's sponsor, and 158 00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:01,480 Speaker 2: when we come back, we're going to talk more with 159 00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:07,400 Speaker 2: Willow about her healing journey. Welcome back. I am talking 160 00:08:07,440 --> 00:08:10,600 Speaker 2: with Willow Weston about her new book, Collide Running into 161 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:14,240 Speaker 2: Healing When Life hands You Hurt. I love that subtitle. 162 00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:16,440 Speaker 2: You've alluded to a lot of this. There was some 163 00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:19,160 Speaker 2: maybe some pain in the relationship with your parents and 164 00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:21,480 Speaker 2: your mother, But would you just elaborate a little bit 165 00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:23,880 Speaker 2: more about like the specific hurt that you experienced that 166 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:24,560 Speaker 2: he did healed. 167 00:08:24,680 --> 00:08:28,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, I think all of us have experienced 168 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:31,400 Speaker 1: hurt and For me, a lot of the hurt that 169 00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:34,880 Speaker 1: I experienced as a kid had to do with sense 170 00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:38,000 Speaker 1: of feeling like my father was absent and my mother 171 00:08:38,120 --> 00:08:41,200 Speaker 1: had an addiction, and all that her addiction brought into 172 00:08:41,240 --> 00:08:46,120 Speaker 1: our house, whether it was you know, angry violent men 173 00:08:46,559 --> 00:08:51,720 Speaker 1: or sexual escapades that no kid should see, to being 174 00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:55,760 Speaker 1: left alone for you know, way too long at a time, 175 00:08:55,840 --> 00:08:58,560 Speaker 1: and feeling abandoned. And so I had all of these 176 00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:01,960 Speaker 1: things that would happen, and I was kind of expected 177 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:06,080 Speaker 1: to just experience it, to just move on and get 178 00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:08,040 Speaker 1: over it. And I think a lot of us can 179 00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:10,440 Speaker 1: resonate with that, whether it's in big ways or small ways. 180 00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:14,080 Speaker 1: We really we have unresolved pain because we've been taught 181 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:18,240 Speaker 1: by people who are wounded themselves to just kind of 182 00:09:18,240 --> 00:09:21,760 Speaker 1: move on, sweep things under the rug, pray about it, 183 00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:24,400 Speaker 1: and it's just going to go away. But the thing 184 00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:27,200 Speaker 1: is about unresolved pain for all of us is that 185 00:09:27,320 --> 00:09:30,760 Speaker 1: it doesn't actually go away. It doesn't go away until 186 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:33,680 Speaker 1: you invite the Lord into it, and you invite him 187 00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:36,200 Speaker 1: to go back to the origin of the pain and 188 00:09:36,360 --> 00:09:41,000 Speaker 1: really heal you. And so that's in big traumatic things, 189 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:44,400 Speaker 1: but it's also you could have been hurt by your 190 00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:46,360 Speaker 1: best friend last week and something she said to you, 191 00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:48,079 Speaker 1: and you're trying to just get over it, but you're 192 00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:50,800 Speaker 1: not getting over it. You're still mad and you're still bitter, 193 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:53,800 Speaker 1: and now your bitterness is coming out sideways. And so 194 00:09:54,559 --> 00:09:59,560 Speaker 1: I think we're a people who just hope that pain disappears, 195 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:03,480 Speaker 1: but it does doesn't magically disappear. Jesus actually invites us 196 00:10:03,679 --> 00:10:06,439 Speaker 1: to deal with it, and not dealing is not healing. 197 00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:10,360 Speaker 1: So yeah, we have a beautiful God who wants to 198 00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:12,079 Speaker 1: meet us in the middle of it and make it. 199 00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:15,960 Speaker 2: You know, healing does take time, and it's very layered, 200 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:18,439 Speaker 2: it's very slow. So how do you think we remain 201 00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:22,120 Speaker 2: faithful and hopeful when healing doesn't happen quickly or neatly. 202 00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:26,640 Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean we're a complex people and so there's 203 00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:28,520 Speaker 1: a lot of areas at least in my life that 204 00:10:28,679 --> 00:10:32,120 Speaker 1: need healing, and so I think we want God to 205 00:10:32,160 --> 00:10:34,760 Speaker 1: wave a magic wand and just make everything better. And 206 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,080 Speaker 1: one of the things that's interesting to me when I 207 00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:39,840 Speaker 1: look at Jesus in the New Testament is that he 208 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:43,280 Speaker 1: actually shows up on people's scenes. He collides with them, 209 00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:46,240 Speaker 1: and he invites them to participate in the healing they 210 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:49,440 Speaker 1: long for. So when you see say him run into 211 00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:52,720 Speaker 1: the man with a shriveled hand, he says, stretch out 212 00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:55,480 Speaker 1: your hand, like he's gonna heal it. But he wants 213 00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:58,400 Speaker 1: the man to actually participate on the Sabbath when he's 214 00:10:58,400 --> 00:11:01,600 Speaker 1: not supposed to move, asking him to take a risk 215 00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:04,400 Speaker 1: and stretch out his hand. You see this when he 216 00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:06,240 Speaker 1: shows up to the man on the mat who's been 217 00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:08,520 Speaker 1: waiting thirty eight years for the water to heal him. 218 00:11:08,640 --> 00:11:12,200 Speaker 1: Jesus shows up on a scene and he actually ends 219 00:11:12,240 --> 00:11:14,000 Speaker 1: up asking him to pick up his matt, and I'm 220 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:16,360 Speaker 1: sure the guy's like what, I'm the dude that doesn't move, 221 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:19,800 Speaker 1: like I've been here almost forty and Jesus is like, no, 222 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,959 Speaker 1: I'm asking you to do something that you don't do. 223 00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:26,160 Speaker 1: I'm asking you to move. And so part of the 224 00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:29,360 Speaker 1: long journey and process with the Lord is that I 225 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,920 Speaker 1: think the Lord is like, I want you to want 226 00:11:31,920 --> 00:11:33,920 Speaker 1: your healing as much as you want me to want 227 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:37,320 Speaker 1: your healing. I want you to actively participate, like I 228 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:40,200 Speaker 1: want you to follow the doctor's orders. I want you 229 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:42,400 Speaker 1: to do the pet stretches. I want you to call 230 00:11:42,440 --> 00:11:45,160 Speaker 1: the therapist. I want you to read the Bible and 231 00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:48,360 Speaker 1: hang on my promises and believe they're true for you 232 00:11:48,480 --> 00:11:50,800 Speaker 1: and not just your friends. Like I want you to 233 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:54,320 Speaker 1: actively name what has hurt you. Who has hurt you? 234 00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:57,000 Speaker 1: That voice that speaks to you and tells you you're 235 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,720 Speaker 1: not worthy? Where did that voice come from? If he 236 00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:03,880 Speaker 1: just waved a magic wand and made the healing process fast, 237 00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:09,080 Speaker 1: then all of the character refining in work and the 238 00:12:09,160 --> 00:12:12,000 Speaker 1: depth that we experience with him, all of that wouldn't 239 00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:15,160 Speaker 1: happen if you just made us all better. He wants 240 00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:18,080 Speaker 1: to get in there with us and do something way greater, 241 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:21,640 Speaker 1: then make us feel like we just experienced an overnightmare. 242 00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:24,400 Speaker 2: Earlier, when you were given part of your testimony, when 243 00:12:24,480 --> 00:12:25,920 Speaker 2: your mom came to your door and you hid in 244 00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:28,199 Speaker 2: the closet, you said something. I feel like that was 245 00:12:28,240 --> 00:12:30,600 Speaker 2: really impactful, that your daughter was with you and that 246 00:12:31,040 --> 00:12:33,000 Speaker 2: in some ways your mom had hurt you, and the 247 00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:34,880 Speaker 2: last thing you wanted to do was then to hurt 248 00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:39,120 Speaker 2: your daughter. Our healing does impact the people around us. 249 00:12:39,160 --> 00:12:41,840 Speaker 2: There's the familiar saying, hurt people hurt other people. Well 250 00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:44,560 Speaker 2: healed people can help heal other people. So talk to 251 00:12:44,679 --> 00:12:49,000 Speaker 2: us about that. How our healing impacts those around us, 252 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,800 Speaker 2: and how you've seen maybe the ripple outward because of 253 00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:52,320 Speaker 2: your healing. 254 00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:58,079 Speaker 1: Yeah. I think so often women especially, we're so busy 255 00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:01,680 Speaker 1: helping everyone else that we don't take the time to 256 00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:04,440 Speaker 1: make space for our own health and our own healing. 257 00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:07,440 Speaker 1: I think we've been invited to be silent and a 258 00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:09,760 Speaker 1: lot for a lot of us, I think we have 259 00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:13,080 Speaker 1: been asked to keep secrets. I think we've been told 260 00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:15,839 Speaker 1: that if we're good little Christians, we'll pray and ask 261 00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:18,240 Speaker 1: God to help us feel better and then we'll move on. 262 00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,840 Speaker 1: We won't make a ruckus, we won't tell our story. 263 00:13:20,880 --> 00:13:23,440 Speaker 1: All of these things. We have all these things, and 264 00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:27,120 Speaker 1: so we put off our healing, we put off our health, 265 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:29,400 Speaker 1: we put off our self care, we put off all 266 00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:31,839 Speaker 1: of these things, and then what happens is is we 267 00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:34,760 Speaker 1: end up hurting the people that we love the most. 268 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,760 Speaker 1: And so what I think is a really helpful reframe, 269 00:13:37,920 --> 00:13:41,400 Speaker 1: because some of us won't say yes to the invitation 270 00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:45,480 Speaker 1: to healing unless we start to think, Okay, if this 271 00:13:45,679 --> 00:13:48,880 Speaker 1: actually is for my kids, I might do it because 272 00:13:48,920 --> 00:13:52,280 Speaker 1: that's how much we love our stink and families. And 273 00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:55,760 Speaker 1: so I want to encourage women to say yes to 274 00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:58,480 Speaker 1: What is one thing you can do today to say 275 00:13:58,559 --> 00:14:02,840 Speaker 1: yes to healing and health because that move is actually 276 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:06,240 Speaker 1: going to help heal your family and help heal your 277 00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:09,400 Speaker 1: friends and invite them to say yes as well. So, 278 00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:12,600 Speaker 1: when I was a mom and I'm hiding in a closet, 279 00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:14,520 Speaker 1: if I would have stayed in that closet, if I 280 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:16,640 Speaker 1: would have come out and not told my husband, not 281 00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:19,320 Speaker 1: gone to therapy, not been real about the fact that 282 00:14:19,360 --> 00:14:22,560 Speaker 1: I could be triggered in a moment's time by my 283 00:14:22,680 --> 00:14:26,120 Speaker 1: childhood pain. If I would have raised Bella and she's 284 00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:29,360 Speaker 1: twenty now, if I would have raised her like that, 285 00:14:29,640 --> 00:14:32,120 Speaker 1: she would be she would have a mess of pain 286 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:34,760 Speaker 1: she'd be having to deal with now. But I get 287 00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:37,360 Speaker 1: to see and she's not perfect by any means, and 288 00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:41,400 Speaker 1: I don't mean to say that at all, but she is. 289 00:14:41,440 --> 00:14:45,400 Speaker 1: She so beautiful and so strong and has faith in 290 00:14:45,440 --> 00:14:47,360 Speaker 1: the Lord. And instead of spending a ton of time 291 00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:49,800 Speaker 1: in therapy dealing with all the wounds I've caused, and 292 00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:52,000 Speaker 1: I'm sure I've hurt her in some ways, but instead 293 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,440 Speaker 1: of having to do all of that, she's out chasing 294 00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:57,880 Speaker 1: people who are hurting because she doesn't have all this baggage. 295 00:14:57,880 --> 00:15:00,600 Speaker 1: She doesn't have the same experience that I grew up with. 296 00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:04,080 Speaker 1: We get a chance to give our kids something different 297 00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:07,760 Speaker 1: than we were handed. You might have inherited something that 298 00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:10,560 Speaker 1: was hard and wounded, but you don't have to pass. 299 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:13,280 Speaker 2: It on when we are still healing. How can we 300 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:17,520 Speaker 2: still love people faithfully in that in between place, like 301 00:15:17,560 --> 00:15:20,800 Speaker 2: if we haven't experienced full healing from something, but yet 302 00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:23,440 Speaker 2: we're still trying to love others? Well, what does that 303 00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:23,800 Speaker 2: look like? 304 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:28,120 Speaker 1: Walk to fine line and maybe your listeners and you 305 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:31,680 Speaker 1: can resonate with this. Where I knew that I wasn't 306 00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:34,840 Speaker 1: going to pull off being the perfect put together mom 307 00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:37,560 Speaker 1: because I'm so far from it, And so I really 308 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:40,000 Speaker 1: tried to figure out what does it look like to 309 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:43,640 Speaker 1: be real with my family, real with my kids about 310 00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:47,640 Speaker 1: what's really going on and how I really need Jesus. 311 00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:50,920 Speaker 1: And so they my kids grew up seeing real pain, 312 00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:53,200 Speaker 1: not where I expected them to be my therapist, but 313 00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:55,840 Speaker 1: where I was real with them. They saw the real pain, 314 00:15:55,880 --> 00:15:58,440 Speaker 1: but they also saw the real redemption. They saw the 315 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:02,400 Speaker 1: power of Jesus showing up in my story. They saw 316 00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:04,280 Speaker 1: how hard it was for me to love my mom. 317 00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:07,200 Speaker 1: They drove down when we would drive down to meet 318 00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:10,560 Speaker 1: my mom and they saw the agony, and yet we 319 00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:13,160 Speaker 1: still knew we were called to go and love her 320 00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:16,160 Speaker 1: in the midst of her addiction. And they were invited 321 00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,600 Speaker 1: into that too. They saw when I met with my 322 00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:22,440 Speaker 1: abusive stepdad near the end of his life and freed 323 00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:25,640 Speaker 1: him into peace and forgiveness. They were there. They saw 324 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:28,200 Speaker 1: me freaking out on the drive, not wanting to do it, 325 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:30,400 Speaker 1: and yet feeling like God was calling me to do it. 326 00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:32,640 Speaker 1: And so all of these things where I got to 327 00:16:32,680 --> 00:16:36,120 Speaker 1: be real with my kids invited them to know exactly 328 00:16:36,520 --> 00:16:39,080 Speaker 1: who to go to and how to get there when 329 00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:42,040 Speaker 1: they feel anxious, when they feel a mess, when they 330 00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:44,400 Speaker 1: feel in pain, when they feel hurt by somebody. And 331 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:47,800 Speaker 1: I think that's the hard thing as a woman, is 332 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,400 Speaker 1: like how real do I get about my mess without 333 00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:53,760 Speaker 1: getting my mess all over other people? But there's something 334 00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:56,600 Speaker 1: so powerful and beautiful when we get real about our 335 00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:59,160 Speaker 1: stories with other people where we invite other people to 336 00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:01,560 Speaker 1: see the power of showing up in that mess and 337 00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:02,760 Speaker 1: bringing about beauty. 338 00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:07,000 Speaker 2: Talk to us about the forgiveness as you have been healing, 339 00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:09,200 Speaker 2: and just the role of the Holy Spirit in all 340 00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:12,000 Speaker 2: of this. You know this whole healing process, and you 341 00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:14,679 Speaker 2: have talked about it beautifully. We can't do any of 342 00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:17,280 Speaker 2: that apart from the Lord's work in our life, Like 343 00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:18,879 Speaker 2: this is not out of our own strength. 344 00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:23,119 Speaker 1: Well man, I mean, forgiveness is a big one, especially 345 00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:26,480 Speaker 1: as a Christian, because I think that we read scripture 346 00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:29,520 Speaker 1: and people throw it around like you're a Christian, you 347 00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:32,560 Speaker 1: need just to forgive them. And I think for some 348 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:37,040 Speaker 1: of us who've experienced some incredibly difficult things, it's not 349 00:17:37,160 --> 00:17:39,159 Speaker 1: as easy as I just need to forgive them. And 350 00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:41,879 Speaker 1: we've been trying that for decades and it's not working. 351 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:44,359 Speaker 1: So we're faking that we've forgiven. So we have this 352 00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,240 Speaker 1: fake forgiveness, but it's not real forgiveness. When I gave 353 00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:50,199 Speaker 1: my life to Jesus Christ, I was it was so 354 00:17:50,680 --> 00:17:53,080 Speaker 1: upside down and radical for me. I mean I had 355 00:17:53,119 --> 00:17:55,800 Speaker 1: to like confess to my family members I was a Christian. 356 00:17:55,840 --> 00:17:58,240 Speaker 1: That was like the worst news ever. So when I 357 00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:01,720 Speaker 1: gave my life to Jesus, my first assignment that I 358 00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:04,840 Speaker 1: remember Jesus giving me is I now want you to 359 00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:09,200 Speaker 1: forgive your father. And I was sitting in therapy for 360 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:13,000 Speaker 1: like over a year saying I can't forgive it. Where 361 00:18:13,119 --> 00:18:15,199 Speaker 1: was he? Where was he when I went through this? 362 00:18:15,320 --> 00:18:17,720 Speaker 1: Where was he when my mom was drunk? Where was 363 00:18:17,760 --> 00:18:21,200 Speaker 1: he when I was being hurt by other men? Where 364 00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:25,679 Speaker 1: was he? And Jesus was changing me and showing me 365 00:18:25,840 --> 00:18:27,680 Speaker 1: how much grace he had for me and how much 366 00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:29,520 Speaker 1: forgiveness he had for me. And the more I spent 367 00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:32,840 Speaker 1: time with Jesus and his character, the more he invited 368 00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:35,440 Speaker 1: me to be like him with my own father. And 369 00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:38,640 Speaker 1: so I was agonizing over this, and my therapist said, 370 00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:42,080 Speaker 1: I want you to take one step to walk towards forgiveness, 371 00:18:42,119 --> 00:18:44,880 Speaker 1: which is something I write about in my book. Sometimes 372 00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:47,920 Speaker 1: forgiveness feels a million miles away. But what's one step 373 00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:51,280 Speaker 1: you can take towards it today? And it might be 374 00:18:51,480 --> 00:18:54,480 Speaker 1: you start by going to therapy. It might be you 375 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:57,120 Speaker 1: name how you feel hurt. It might be you write 376 00:18:57,119 --> 00:18:59,480 Speaker 1: a letter. She said, write a letter to your dad. 377 00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:01,800 Speaker 1: You never have to mail it. And I wrote a 378 00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:04,960 Speaker 1: letter to my dad and I wrote years and years 379 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:07,479 Speaker 1: of pain, and I wasn't going to send it. And 380 00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:10,399 Speaker 1: then I decided. My next step I decided was to 381 00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:13,960 Speaker 1: send it. And I sent that letter, and I remember 382 00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:16,520 Speaker 1: the day I got an envelope back. I saw his handwriting, 383 00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:19,439 Speaker 1: and I sat down and I thought, I'm so scared 384 00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:22,400 Speaker 1: to open this because if he dismisses my pain, that's 385 00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:25,760 Speaker 1: going to make everything her all over again. And it 386 00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:28,480 Speaker 1: doesn't always happen like this, and I understand that, and 387 00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:32,240 Speaker 1: forgiveness cannot be about the response of the other person. 388 00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:35,520 Speaker 1: What I realized was that my bitter heart towards my 389 00:19:35,640 --> 00:19:38,439 Speaker 1: dad me wanting my dad to hurt because he hurt me. 390 00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:41,520 Speaker 1: That was torturing me, that was keeping me a prisoner, 391 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:45,480 Speaker 1: that was embittering and poisoning my life. And so whatever 392 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:49,120 Speaker 1: was in that letter, it didn't matter because I decided 393 00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:51,160 Speaker 1: who I wanted to be as a person, and who 394 00:19:51,160 --> 00:19:53,440 Speaker 1: I wanted to be was more like Jesus. So, if 395 00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:55,760 Speaker 1: you're out there and you're listening, and forgiveness feels a 396 00:19:55,760 --> 00:19:59,119 Speaker 1: million miles away, number one, take the first step towards it. 397 00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:01,680 Speaker 1: And it might not be for it might be praying, 398 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:06,080 Speaker 1: Lord help me. I don't know how I can forgive 399 00:20:06,119 --> 00:20:08,120 Speaker 1: this person, but I know you've called me to it. 400 00:20:08,320 --> 00:20:11,920 Speaker 1: But take the first step towards it and decide that 401 00:20:12,040 --> 00:20:14,760 Speaker 1: your forgiveness has much more to do with the kind 402 00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:16,480 Speaker 1: of person you want to be than it has to 403 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:19,280 Speaker 1: do with their response. I opened the letter my dad sent, 404 00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:24,040 Speaker 1: and he absolutely owned every last drop of his absence 405 00:20:24,080 --> 00:20:26,240 Speaker 1: in my life and how much pain it caused me, 406 00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:29,200 Speaker 1: and how it's his biggest regret. And I will tell 407 00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:31,760 Speaker 1: you my dad has since passed away. He passed away 408 00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:35,240 Speaker 1: this year, and my dad and I reached a place 409 00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:40,119 Speaker 1: of forgiveness and reconciliation. We became friends, and the last 410 00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:42,879 Speaker 1: day I spent with my dad, I am so very 411 00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:45,800 Speaker 1: grateful that we got to experience that gift of peace, 412 00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:49,119 Speaker 1: So extremely grateful. But it took a long time to 413 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:51,919 Speaker 1: get there. It wasn't overnight, and it wasn't because I 414 00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:54,400 Speaker 1: read a scripture on it. Yes, I read a scripture 415 00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:56,760 Speaker 1: on it, and I heard what the Lord's will is 416 00:20:56,800 --> 00:21:00,119 Speaker 1: in the Lord's heart. But it needed to be real forgiveness, 417 00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:02,840 Speaker 1: not fake. I'm saying the right thing, forgiveness. 418 00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,879 Speaker 2: I love the E are so authentic and real with 419 00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:08,280 Speaker 2: your story, and what I'm hearing in your story is 420 00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:10,480 Speaker 2: that there is hope for our hurts and our heartbreak. 421 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:12,800 Speaker 2: And as you were talking about being bitter with your 422 00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:17,280 Speaker 2: earthly father, it occurred to me that it's possible for 423 00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:20,439 Speaker 2: us to be bitter with our heavenly Father, that he 424 00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:23,240 Speaker 2: would allow some of these hurts to even happen, to 425 00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:25,840 Speaker 2: begin with, talk to us about. 426 00:21:26,320 --> 00:21:28,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's interesting. Have a chapter in my book called 427 00:21:28,960 --> 00:21:33,000 Speaker 1: if You Hads and it comes from the story in 428 00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:36,439 Speaker 1: the Bible where Mary and Martha had asked Jesus to 429 00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:40,040 Speaker 1: come because their brother Lazarus was sick, and Scripture says 430 00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:43,400 Speaker 1: he purposely waited for three days and didn't go when 431 00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:46,160 Speaker 1: they asked him to, and Lazarus dies and Jesus shows 432 00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:49,600 Speaker 1: up in town and both Mary and Martha run out 433 00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:52,760 Speaker 1: when they hear Jesus is there, and they both say 434 00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:56,080 Speaker 1: the same thing. They say, if you had been here, 435 00:21:56,480 --> 00:22:00,680 Speaker 1: If you had been here, our brother would not have died. 436 00:22:01,040 --> 00:22:05,880 Speaker 1: And I think there's this really interesting sense that they 437 00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:09,120 Speaker 1: were being so raw and real with their grief, not 438 00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:11,760 Speaker 1: just their grief of their brother, but their grief of God, 439 00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,840 Speaker 1: Like where were you God? When I needed you? You 440 00:22:14,920 --> 00:22:16,879 Speaker 1: didn't show up in the way that I wanted you 441 00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:19,760 Speaker 1: to show up. And I love you and follow you, 442 00:22:19,920 --> 00:22:22,640 Speaker 1: and like where were you? And I think a lot 443 00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:25,080 Speaker 1: of us need to start with our if you hats 444 00:22:25,119 --> 00:22:28,040 Speaker 1: with God. I think we have to get real They're there, 445 00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:30,640 Speaker 1: You can't pretend that they're not there. If they're there, 446 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:35,200 Speaker 1: if you feel ticked off that God didn't rescue someone 447 00:22:35,560 --> 00:22:38,600 Speaker 1: or didn't answer prayer, or didn't give you a dream 448 00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:43,080 Speaker 1: or save you from a disappointment, God knows that's there anyways. 449 00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:46,000 Speaker 1: You're not hiding it from him. He knows all of 450 00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:48,560 Speaker 1: your thoughts, right Psalm one thirty nine, Like there's nowhere 451 00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:50,880 Speaker 1: we can go that God doesn't know who we are 452 00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:52,679 Speaker 1: and what we think and what we do, and so 453 00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:56,320 Speaker 1: he already knows and he actually Jesus sits with Mary 454 00:22:56,320 --> 00:22:59,680 Speaker 1: and Martha. This is this is the great, absolutely most 455 00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:03,359 Speaker 1: un rated verse and easiest one memorize of all time. 456 00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:07,439 Speaker 1: Jesus wept. He actually emmots with them. He sits with 457 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:10,920 Speaker 1: them in their pain and grieves with them. I actually 458 00:23:11,200 --> 00:23:14,400 Speaker 1: talk about this in the book, but as a new Christian, 459 00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:20,800 Speaker 1: my therapist invited me to go back to one childhood 460 00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:23,879 Speaker 1: the saddest childhood memory I could think of. And I 461 00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:25,879 Speaker 1: didn't want to have to do that. And it was 462 00:23:25,920 --> 00:23:28,880 Speaker 1: weird because what I had thought about and I won't 463 00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:30,680 Speaker 1: go into it too much, but it was a very 464 00:23:30,720 --> 00:23:34,240 Speaker 1: surprising thought and memory, and she asked me to invite 465 00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:36,919 Speaker 1: Jesus to go back to that place, and I couldn't 466 00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:40,040 Speaker 1: do it. I couldn't do it for probably a year 467 00:23:40,160 --> 00:23:42,960 Speaker 1: or two, and I finally got to a place where 468 00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:46,400 Speaker 1: I could invite Jesus into that grief of why did 469 00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:48,879 Speaker 1: you leave me here in this pain? Why did I 470 00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:51,320 Speaker 1: have to go down all these roads and go through 471 00:23:51,320 --> 00:23:53,840 Speaker 1: all the things I had to go through? Where were you? 472 00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:57,160 Speaker 1: Why weren't you with me? And I had this crazy 473 00:23:57,320 --> 00:24:01,040 Speaker 1: experience where He just spoke over me, into me and 474 00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:04,000 Speaker 1: held me in that space in a way that just 475 00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:07,760 Speaker 1: unlocked so many ways that I'd been bound. And so 476 00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:13,000 Speaker 1: I think grieving with God and grieving God are both 477 00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:13,800 Speaker 1: very important. 478 00:24:13,880 --> 00:24:16,639 Speaker 2: I can't wait to continue today's conversation, but we're going 479 00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:18,320 Speaker 2: to take another brief break to hear a word from 480 00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,080 Speaker 2: today's sponsor, and when we come back, we're going to 481 00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:25,840 Speaker 2: continue talking with Wiston, with Willow about how healing from 482 00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:30,800 Speaker 2: her is possible. Welcome back. I'm talking with Willow Wiston 483 00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:34,919 Speaker 2: about her book Collide Running into Healing when life hands 484 00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:38,119 Speaker 2: you hurt and so Willow, I'm just being super mindful 485 00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:41,000 Speaker 2: that someone listening right now is in the midst of 486 00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:43,800 Speaker 2: hurt and she's holding onto it. Maybe it happened far 487 00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:46,000 Speaker 2: back in the past, or maybe it just happened today, 488 00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:48,960 Speaker 2: just moments ago. What would be your encouragement to her today? 489 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:52,439 Speaker 2: What's one thing she can do today to start the 490 00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:56,600 Speaker 2: healing process. Think I want to say that you're worthy 491 00:24:57,080 --> 00:25:00,760 Speaker 2: of healing. You're worthy of healing your pain, in your hurt, 492 00:25:00,840 --> 00:25:03,280 Speaker 2: no matter how big or small, no matter how much 493 00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:06,800 Speaker 2: other people have maybe dismissed them, or how strong you've 494 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:09,919 Speaker 2: been and what a survivor you are and how you've 495 00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:14,359 Speaker 2: managed anyways, you're worthy of healing, and you get to 496 00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:17,840 Speaker 2: say yes to God's invitation to heal today, and not 497 00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:21,119 Speaker 2: only will that help you and your life, but it'll 498 00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:23,680 Speaker 2: help bring healing into the people's lives that you love. 499 00:25:24,040 --> 00:25:26,640 Speaker 2: So this year on the podcast, I've been asking all 500 00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:30,120 Speaker 2: of my guests, is there a biblical concept of love 501 00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:31,879 Speaker 2: that you think applies to this topic. 502 00:25:32,080 --> 00:25:34,280 Speaker 1: Well, I don't know if this answers your question. But 503 00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:37,560 Speaker 1: when I see the life of Jesus and he is love, 504 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:41,440 Speaker 1: he's lov incarnate like we see him God with us 505 00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:46,640 Speaker 1: walking around, and he runs towards pain. Love runs towards pain. 506 00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:49,240 Speaker 1: It doesn't run away from pain. It doesn't avoid pain. 507 00:25:49,320 --> 00:25:52,920 Speaker 1: It doesn't sweet pain under the rug. Love runs towards 508 00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:57,920 Speaker 1: our pain and enters it and heals it. God can 509 00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:00,720 Speaker 1: handle our pain and he can heal it because he 510 00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:03,960 Speaker 1: is love. He loves you so much. He doesn't want 511 00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:07,560 Speaker 1: to keep you stuck in your hurt, but he actually 512 00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:09,920 Speaker 1: wants to heal your hurt and then use your life 513 00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:12,960 Speaker 1: and purpose your life in your story to help heal 514 00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:13,639 Speaker 1: other people. 515 00:26:13,840 --> 00:26:16,480 Speaker 2: You know. It strikes me that if we're to love 516 00:26:16,520 --> 00:26:18,640 Speaker 2: as God has loved us, and he loves us by 517 00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:21,639 Speaker 2: running towards our pain, then is that something that we 518 00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:23,920 Speaker 2: should do with other people run towards their pain. 519 00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:28,000 Speaker 1: I absolutely believe we should be running towards pain. I 520 00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:29,960 Speaker 1: think a lot of us are like, Where's God? I 521 00:26:29,960 --> 00:26:32,960 Speaker 1: don't feel like I'm experiencing God, And I think God's like, hey, 522 00:26:33,240 --> 00:26:36,360 Speaker 1: I'm running into you know, look at him. He gets 523 00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:38,240 Speaker 1: out of a boat and goes into the tombs in 524 00:26:38,280 --> 00:26:40,720 Speaker 1: a cemetery where a guy's crying out, Dan Knight, and 525 00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:43,679 Speaker 1: he's cutting himself, and Jesus intentionally goes out of his 526 00:26:43,760 --> 00:26:45,840 Speaker 1: way to meet him. He goes out of his way 527 00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:48,320 Speaker 1: to meet the woman at the bewell, who you know 528 00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:52,159 Speaker 1: clearly is struggling in life and has this pattern in 529 00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:54,520 Speaker 1: her life that isn't working and it's wounding her life, 530 00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:56,359 Speaker 1: and he goes out of his way to meet her. 531 00:26:56,560 --> 00:26:58,520 Speaker 1: He's on his way to heal a twelve year old 532 00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:03,080 Speaker 1: girl and a woman who's been bleeding for like twelve years, 533 00:27:03,240 --> 00:27:05,679 Speaker 1: the same amount of years as the young girl is, 534 00:27:05,800 --> 00:27:09,119 Speaker 1: and he and she reaches out and touches the hem 535 00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:11,520 Speaker 1: of his robe, and he stops for her. We have 536 00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:15,080 Speaker 1: a God who runs towards pain, and we're called to 537 00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:18,840 Speaker 1: follow him. We're actually called to be imitators of him, 538 00:27:19,160 --> 00:27:21,560 Speaker 1: and so that looks like actually entering pain. We tend 539 00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:23,840 Speaker 1: to be people who want to avoid people's pain. It 540 00:27:23,920 --> 00:27:26,960 Speaker 1: scares us. And yet we have a God who runs 541 00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:29,159 Speaker 1: right towards it, And so what does it look like 542 00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:31,760 Speaker 1: for us to be it we get healing from Jesus, 543 00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:35,320 Speaker 1: the more healing we get in our collisions with wounded people, 544 00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:38,000 Speaker 1: instead of bringing wounds, we can bring more healing. 545 00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:41,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, it seems to me, and I'm just being transparent 546 00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:43,560 Speaker 2: that me and most of the people I know we 547 00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:47,000 Speaker 2: run away from pain, our pain and everybody else's like, 548 00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:49,800 Speaker 2: we don't want to get messy. With it. But that's it. Honestly, 549 00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:52,800 Speaker 2: every story you've told, and looking at scripture and the 550 00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:55,399 Speaker 2: stories that I know in the Bible, I would concur 551 00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:58,000 Speaker 2: with what you have found that he runs to it. 552 00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:00,720 Speaker 2: He's in constant pursuit of a relationship with us, not 553 00:28:00,760 --> 00:28:04,560 Speaker 2: because we're clean or deserve it, or that everything is perfect, 554 00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:06,639 Speaker 2: but because of the opposite in some ways. So I 555 00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:08,840 Speaker 2: just love this message so much and believe it's going 556 00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:11,880 Speaker 2: to help so many people as it's helped me already today. 557 00:28:12,000 --> 00:28:13,919 Speaker 2: And so on a little bit of a lighter topic, 558 00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:16,639 Speaker 2: is there something that you are loving right now? Ooh, 559 00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:19,879 Speaker 2: something I'm loving right now? Well, this seems silly, but 560 00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:23,320 Speaker 2: Jess recently became an empty nester, so when my chicks 561 00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:26,080 Speaker 2: are in the nest, there's nothing I love more Like 562 00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:30,200 Speaker 2: I just absolutely adore when this last holiday season both 563 00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:32,479 Speaker 2: kids moved back into the house and I was like 564 00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:36,760 Speaker 2: I was in like heaven on Earth. Just absolutely loved it. 565 00:28:36,920 --> 00:28:39,160 Speaker 2: Me too. I'm going to be an empty nester in 566 00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:42,120 Speaker 2: a couple of years and I'm not looking forward to it. 567 00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,720 Speaker 2: But I know there's beauty in every season and I 568 00:28:44,800 --> 00:28:48,080 Speaker 2: know that, and so I'm thankful that hopefully that they 569 00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:49,640 Speaker 2: will continue to want to come home. 570 00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:52,400 Speaker 1: That's the goal. Yes, that is the goal, and I'm 571 00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:53,080 Speaker 1: sure they will. 572 00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:55,840 Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, so I know I want to stay connected 573 00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:57,640 Speaker 2: with you. I'm sure listeners are going to want to, 574 00:28:57,840 --> 00:28:59,080 Speaker 2: so tell us how we can best do that. 575 00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:01,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you so much, Rachel for having me on 576 00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:04,600 Speaker 1: and for doing the work that you do. I think 577 00:29:04,640 --> 00:29:07,720 Speaker 1: it's so important to point women to Jesus and invite 578 00:29:07,760 --> 00:29:11,040 Speaker 1: them into following Him and being more loving in the 579 00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:14,400 Speaker 1: world and to themselves. So I appreciate you and all 580 00:29:14,400 --> 00:29:17,720 Speaker 1: that you're about. Yeah, if people want to stay in touch, 581 00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:21,880 Speaker 1: I'm on Instagram at Willow and Weston. And if you 582 00:29:21,920 --> 00:29:24,880 Speaker 1: want to get my new book and hear more about 583 00:29:24,920 --> 00:29:27,080 Speaker 1: the message that the Lord laid on my heart, you 584 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:29,480 Speaker 1: can get it at most places books are sold, Barnes 585 00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:32,440 Speaker 1: and Noble, that kind of thing. And yeah, thank you 586 00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:33,480 Speaker 1: so much for having me. 587 00:29:33,760 --> 00:29:36,200 Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, it's been a pleasure to have you. 588 00:29:36,360 --> 00:29:38,800 Speaker 2: And so would you close us today in a word 589 00:29:38,840 --> 00:29:39,240 Speaker 2: of prayer? 590 00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:44,440 Speaker 1: Absolutely, Jesus, we come before you today and thank you 591 00:29:44,560 --> 00:29:47,920 Speaker 1: that you are a god who runs right into our mess, 592 00:29:48,080 --> 00:29:51,880 Speaker 1: right into our pain, into our grief and our story. 593 00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:55,680 Speaker 1: And not only can you handle all of it, but 594 00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,880 Speaker 1: you want to heal it. God, I prayed it in 595 00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:03,000 Speaker 1: the places in space that hurt today. Will you make 596 00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:06,040 Speaker 1: us more whole? Will you show us how we can 597 00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:09,719 Speaker 1: participate in what next steps you're calling us towards, and 598 00:30:09,760 --> 00:30:13,640 Speaker 1: will you remind us that we're worthy of it? God? 599 00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:16,200 Speaker 1: In the ways that someone might be listening and they 600 00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:20,400 Speaker 1: don't believe that they're worthy of it, or that they 601 00:30:20,440 --> 00:30:23,320 Speaker 1: have time for it, or that it matters. God, will 602 00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:27,360 Speaker 1: you show them that they're healing matters and their healing 603 00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:30,440 Speaker 1: will help heal the people they love. Thank you, Jesus, 604 00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:32,760 Speaker 1: that you love us so much that you would take 605 00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:35,960 Speaker 1: on our wounds and our pain, our sin and suffering 606 00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:38,720 Speaker 1: so that we would always know how loved we are. 607 00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:41,840 Speaker 1: We pray this in your name, Jesus, Amen. 608 00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:44,960 Speaker 2: Amen, Will just as you're praying, I had just the 609 00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:50,080 Speaker 2: picture of Jesus was wounded and hurt too. He knows 610 00:30:50,240 --> 00:30:53,640 Speaker 2: and he enters into He's experienced everything or more than 611 00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:56,640 Speaker 2: we have. And that's the kind of God that we serve. 612 00:30:56,920 --> 00:31:00,400 Speaker 2: What a beautiful picture. Hmm, so beautiful. Thanks for I 613 00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:04,800 Speaker 2: love Jesus, me too, and I love you so Thank 614 00:31:04,800 --> 00:31:07,360 Speaker 2: you so much for being with us today. Thank you, Rachel, 615 00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:10,160 Speaker 2: thank you for having me. Thank you so much for 616 00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:12,920 Speaker 2: listening to the Love Offering Podcast. I hope today's conversation 617 00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:15,480 Speaker 2: encouraged and inspired you to love God, love others, and 618 00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:18,360 Speaker 2: even love yourself a little more. If you enjoyed this episode, 619 00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:20,280 Speaker 2: please share with her friend and leave a review. It 620 00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:22,400 Speaker 2: helps others find the show and spreads the message of 621 00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:24,640 Speaker 2: love even further. To connect with me, visit me on 622 00:31:24,680 --> 00:31:27,280 Speaker 2: my website at Rachelcaadams dot com. Why are there be 623 00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:29,960 Speaker 2: sure to download the Love Offering Calendar, a free resource 624 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:32,480 Speaker 2: filled with simple daily ways to love those around you. 625 00:31:32,600 --> 00:31:34,800 Speaker 2: Don't forget to pick up a copy of Willow Weston's 626 00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:37,680 Speaker 2: new book Collide Running into Healing when Life hands You 627 00:31:37,760 --> 00:31:40,880 Speaker 2: hurt especial thank you to Life Audio for supporting this 628 00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:43,640 Speaker 2: podcast and making it possible to fund more great podcast 629 00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:45,280 Speaker 2: visitlifeaudio dot com. 630 00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:46,960 Speaker 1: Thanks again for joining us today. 631 00:31:47,040 --> 00:31:50,560 Speaker 2: Until next time, let's make our lives an offering of love.