1 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:03,600 Speaker 1: Life Audio. 2 00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:08,080 Speaker 2: What if in the middle of your toughest season, grief 3 00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:12,600 Speaker 2: and joy could coexist, God's purpose could really pull through 4 00:00:12,920 --> 00:00:14,960 Speaker 2: in the middle of your pain. That is what we 5 00:00:14,960 --> 00:00:22,760 Speaker 2: were talking about today with my guest Courtney pray Dukee. Hello, Hello, Hello, 6 00:00:22,840 --> 00:00:25,400 Speaker 2: ladies and gents, and welcome to this week's episode of 7 00:00:25,440 --> 00:00:27,840 Speaker 2: the Botton Beloved Podcast. As always, it to your Girl 8 00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:31,600 Speaker 2: Kirby Kelly. Back at it again and I'm really excited 9 00:00:31,720 --> 00:00:34,880 Speaker 2: to have my guest on today, Courtney Prey Duke. 10 00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:37,839 Speaker 3: She is an author. She's just awesome. 11 00:00:38,080 --> 00:00:40,000 Speaker 2: She and I we were like talking literally before we 12 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:43,040 Speaker 2: started recording and everything. And she's in the middle of 13 00:00:43,080 --> 00:00:45,360 Speaker 2: like a million life transitions and she has a book 14 00:00:45,440 --> 00:00:47,639 Speaker 2: coming out, and it's like all the things are happening, 15 00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:50,559 Speaker 2: yet she's still just locked in on what God has 16 00:00:50,600 --> 00:00:52,960 Speaker 2: called her to do, especially with the message of her book, 17 00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:57,480 Speaker 2: which is called and She Got Up Shattered by Loss 18 00:00:57,520 --> 00:01:02,080 Speaker 2: Restored by Jesus. And I absolutely love the theme of 19 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:04,840 Speaker 2: this book, the topic of this book. As y'all know, 20 00:01:04,959 --> 00:01:07,520 Speaker 2: I literally have a book coming out in April all 21 00:01:07,560 --> 00:01:12,280 Speaker 2: about hope and navigating crisis with hope and questions with hope. 22 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:15,680 Speaker 2: And in her book, she dives into her own journey 23 00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:20,959 Speaker 2: of restoration and grief and bringing her suffering to the 24 00:01:21,040 --> 00:01:23,840 Speaker 2: Lord and seeing God work that out. So I just 25 00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:25,880 Speaker 2: feel like the timing of all of this is so 26 00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:28,640 Speaker 2: God that these are the kinds of conversations that we're 27 00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:32,440 Speaker 2: having on here. So without further ado, Courtney, welcome to 28 00:01:32,480 --> 00:01:35,520 Speaker 2: the podcast. Can you just briefly introduce, like who you are, 29 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:37,840 Speaker 2: what you do, what you're passionate about to the listeners. 30 00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:40,760 Speaker 1: Yes, Hey, Kurby, thank you so much for having me. 31 00:01:40,959 --> 00:01:43,560 Speaker 1: I am so pomped, and you know, I feel like 32 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:46,319 Speaker 1: I've known you for a long time and we just met, 33 00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:48,880 Speaker 1: So what an honor to be on today. Thank you 34 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:54,840 Speaker 1: for making space. I'm so excited and grateful for all 35 00:01:54,880 --> 00:01:59,520 Speaker 1: that God has done in my life. And yes, I 36 00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:02,880 Speaker 1: have a book coming out. Yes, I'm so grateful to 37 00:02:02,920 --> 00:02:05,960 Speaker 1: get to carry this hope to the world. But what 38 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:08,120 Speaker 1: stands out the most to me is that in a 39 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:12,760 Speaker 1: world where everything is there's a lot of inauthentic things 40 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:15,760 Speaker 1: out there, and especially in this AI world, and you 41 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:17,840 Speaker 1: don't know what's real and what's not real. And one 42 00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:23,359 Speaker 1: of the most beautiful, striking things is that with Jesus, 43 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:26,760 Speaker 1: I mean, he has been with me every step of 44 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:31,079 Speaker 1: my journey and he is the real thing. And I'm 45 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:34,799 Speaker 1: sitting here today because he has made it possible for 46 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:37,000 Speaker 1: me to live through my greatest heartbreak. 47 00:02:38,280 --> 00:02:40,400 Speaker 3: Well, that's what we're going to dive into today. 48 00:02:40,639 --> 00:02:43,400 Speaker 2: And I would just love, you know, for listeners who 49 00:02:43,440 --> 00:02:46,919 Speaker 2: are not familiar with you, your story, your testimony, can 50 00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:51,080 Speaker 2: you share what that is and kind of the foundation 51 00:02:51,440 --> 00:02:54,679 Speaker 2: from where your book came from, with the loss and 52 00:02:54,919 --> 00:02:57,480 Speaker 2: the change that you've experienced in your life. 53 00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:01,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, so early on in life, we go way back, 54 00:03:02,440 --> 00:03:06,079 Speaker 1: early on in life. I met my husband. We actually 55 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:11,079 Speaker 1: met in third and fourth grade and we got engaged 56 00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:13,880 Speaker 1: at nineteen and twenty. I'm sorry, we got engaged. We 57 00:03:13,919 --> 00:03:18,320 Speaker 1: got married at nineteen and twenty, and we did ministry together, 58 00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:23,840 Speaker 1: we led worship together. It was just this beautiful, God given, 59 00:03:24,040 --> 00:03:28,280 Speaker 1: God orchestrated relationship that we knew that we were on 60 00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:32,040 Speaker 1: to live on mission together. And Andrew was such a 61 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:37,000 Speaker 1: rare and unique man. He was extraordinary and loved me 62 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:43,760 Speaker 1: so well. And fast forward through a decade of being married, 63 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:47,960 Speaker 1: we had three babies. We were watching our church grow 64 00:03:48,080 --> 00:03:52,680 Speaker 1: and really just living the dream life. You know, It's 65 00:03:52,760 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 1: like our kids were growing and thriving, our friendships were blossoming, 66 00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:01,640 Speaker 1: and we had just moved in a new house on 67 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:04,040 Speaker 1: a cold Desac road. You know, all these things that 68 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:06,360 Speaker 1: you think in your mind like we're living the dream, 69 00:04:06,720 --> 00:04:10,760 Speaker 1: like the absolute dream. And the day before Thanksgiving was 70 00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:15,040 Speaker 1: a clear blue day and it was just absolutely stunning. 71 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:17,560 Speaker 1: We were settled in at home, the kids were out 72 00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:20,560 Speaker 1: of school. I had we had eight Our kids were 73 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:23,839 Speaker 1: now eight, six and two. I had two boys and 74 00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:27,240 Speaker 1: a girl in the middle, and it was just an 75 00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:31,240 Speaker 1: ordinary day before we were getting ready for the holidays 76 00:04:31,360 --> 00:04:34,039 Speaker 1: and cleaning up from our Christmas decorations that we'd put 77 00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:37,400 Speaker 1: out the night before. And my husband, Andrew was an 78 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:40,839 Speaker 1: avid cyclist, so on the side he would go and 79 00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:44,320 Speaker 1: ride his bike for miles and miles, and this particular 80 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:46,400 Speaker 1: day he was doing a seventy five mile ride that 81 00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:49,000 Speaker 1: was just right around the house. You know, no big deal, 82 00:04:50,560 --> 00:04:53,680 Speaker 1: all right, I can't imagine, but he was just quite 83 00:04:53,720 --> 00:04:57,800 Speaker 1: the specimen, very very in shape, and anyway, this was 84 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:00,039 Speaker 1: just like an out a thing he did for you know, 85 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:04,039 Speaker 1: his outlet and just to get life being outdoors. And 86 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:07,680 Speaker 1: he was getting ready to walk out the door and 87 00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:10,080 Speaker 1: he said, is there anything I can do for you 88 00:05:10,120 --> 00:05:13,000 Speaker 1: to make your day more enjoyable. And I said, no, baby, 89 00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:15,600 Speaker 1: you've been amazing. I love you. He said, I love 90 00:05:15,640 --> 00:05:19,520 Speaker 1: you too. I'll be home around two pm. And he 91 00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:21,960 Speaker 1: gathered up his snacks and his, you know, his little 92 00:05:22,040 --> 00:05:25,440 Speaker 1: jersey bib that he wore, and walked out the door. 93 00:05:25,520 --> 00:05:28,799 Speaker 1: And I can remember hearing the garage door very vividly, 94 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:31,040 Speaker 1: and I just kind of stopped and I looked at it, 95 00:05:32,160 --> 00:05:34,440 Speaker 1: and the kids were off playing somewhere, and I just 96 00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:38,400 Speaker 1: prayed for him, like Lord, protect him, and just like 97 00:05:38,440 --> 00:05:41,640 Speaker 1: I always had. And the day, the morning went on, 98 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:46,720 Speaker 1: and a few hours rolled around, and just before I 99 00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:49,000 Speaker 1: was getting ready to sit down and eat lunch, I 100 00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:56,440 Speaker 1: got a phone call that changed everything. And I just 101 00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:58,720 Speaker 1: found out that he had been in an accident. And 102 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:01,719 Speaker 1: I tried calling his phone and he wouldn't pick up. 103 00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,560 Speaker 1: And we had been together at this point. Now I 104 00:06:04,640 --> 00:06:07,440 Speaker 1: was twenty nine and he was thirty, and we had 105 00:06:07,480 --> 00:06:09,880 Speaker 1: been together over half of our lives at this point, 106 00:06:10,560 --> 00:06:13,960 Speaker 1: and I can remember thinking, God, anything but him, Please 107 00:06:14,080 --> 00:06:16,559 Speaker 1: just keep him alive. I mean I was praying out loud, 108 00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:19,560 Speaker 1: begging him as we were speeding down the highway. Now, 109 00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:21,240 Speaker 1: I've got the kids in the back seat and we're 110 00:06:21,279 --> 00:06:24,599 Speaker 1: headed to the hospital, only to find out a few 111 00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:30,159 Speaker 1: moments later through another phone call, that Andrew didn't make it. 112 00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:38,280 Speaker 1: And in that moment, Kirby, my entire life and everything 113 00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:43,799 Speaker 1: we had built up to this point literally came crashing down. 114 00:06:44,920 --> 00:06:47,919 Speaker 1: And I had three babies sitting in the back seat 115 00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:51,440 Speaker 1: that we're asking where Daddy is, and I had to 116 00:06:51,480 --> 00:06:53,960 Speaker 1: tell them that he was with Jesus. And so it 117 00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:59,400 Speaker 1: was like everything that I had, you know, It's like 118 00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:05,760 Speaker 1: my walk with Jesus became something that I you know, 119 00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:09,400 Speaker 1: it was just going going along with life and doing 120 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:13,320 Speaker 1: doing the thing and trusting him. But it wasn't until 121 00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:18,560 Speaker 1: I lost everything that the presence of God became so 122 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:23,120 Speaker 1: real and so palpable. But it did not come without 123 00:07:23,240 --> 00:07:28,480 Speaker 1: this wrestle of God. What are you doing? So shattered? 124 00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:32,600 Speaker 1: Is you know that that word is is very appropriate 125 00:07:32,640 --> 00:07:35,880 Speaker 1: because there was a million broken pieces. It looked like 126 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:40,560 Speaker 1: our life had just been blown up and and and 127 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:44,080 Speaker 1: then it's like, okay, God, now what Like it was 128 00:07:44,200 --> 00:07:47,800 Speaker 1: hard to see that anything good was to ever come 129 00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:51,480 Speaker 1: from my life again. I felt like my better days 130 00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:56,120 Speaker 1: were behind me. And then we we went on this journey, 131 00:07:56,360 --> 00:08:01,680 Speaker 1: a very long journey of God breathing life into me 132 00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:03,760 Speaker 1: when I didn't think I was gonna make it. When 133 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:07,560 Speaker 1: I left the cemetery after Christmas in twenty seven degrees 134 00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:14,000 Speaker 1: a frozen ground, remember driving home to go back to 135 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:17,680 Speaker 1: Atlanta where he was buried in Arkansas, and I remember saying, God, 136 00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:20,239 Speaker 1: you're gonna have to breathe life back into me, because 137 00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:24,480 Speaker 1: if you don't, I'm not gonna make it. And from 138 00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:27,760 Speaker 1: that moment on, I mean, I felt like God was 139 00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:32,200 Speaker 1: just saying you are mine, trust me and follow me, 140 00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:36,959 Speaker 1: and and that you know, that is what I did. 141 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:39,680 Speaker 1: And I, you know, I every day had a choice 142 00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:43,040 Speaker 1: to wake up and choose, am I gonna Am I 143 00:08:43,080 --> 00:08:46,920 Speaker 1: gonna just give in to this awful pain? And it 144 00:08:46,920 --> 00:08:51,080 Speaker 1: would have been really easy to do that, or am 145 00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:56,080 Speaker 1: I gonna choose to follow Jesus even though my life 146 00:08:56,240 --> 00:08:59,520 Speaker 1: is wrecked, it is broken, and I don't know if 147 00:08:59,559 --> 00:09:02,439 Speaker 1: it's it might be beyond repair. I mean, that does 148 00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:06,160 Speaker 1: a very honest account of the way it felt. 149 00:09:07,559 --> 00:09:13,320 Speaker 2: But God, that is literally I could just bawl my 150 00:09:13,360 --> 00:09:17,679 Speaker 2: eyes out hearing that, because that's one of like having 151 00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:19,960 Speaker 2: gone through grief in my own life. Too. I lost 152 00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 2: both my parents to addiction and having like this the 153 00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:27,720 Speaker 2: there was the looming part of it of like Okay, 154 00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:30,720 Speaker 2: you're living life that's destroying you. But then when they died, 155 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:34,400 Speaker 2: it being like a sudden traumatic just like like what happened, 156 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:34,800 Speaker 2: Like my. 157 00:09:34,720 --> 00:09:37,280 Speaker 3: Life is, like you said, shattered, like in an instant, 158 00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:37,920 Speaker 3: in a moment. 159 00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,160 Speaker 2: Just hearing your story with that, that's something that I 160 00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:44,640 Speaker 2: even have to surrender to the Lord daily of just 161 00:09:44,679 --> 00:09:48,320 Speaker 2: like that fear of what if God takes this person 162 00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:50,880 Speaker 2: away in my life, this person away in my life. 163 00:09:50,920 --> 00:09:55,880 Speaker 2: It's like living with that and having to surrender and 164 00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:58,439 Speaker 2: trust that to the Lord of like it could happen again. 165 00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:01,600 Speaker 2: You never know, like God's will that way, the broken well, 166 00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:03,079 Speaker 2: we live all the things at play. 167 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:06,160 Speaker 3: So I really I feel for you a lot and 168 00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:07,680 Speaker 3: as as. 169 00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:11,360 Speaker 2: Much as I can empathize of just losing someone suddenly 170 00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:12,559 Speaker 2: and tragically. 171 00:10:12,080 --> 00:10:12,800 Speaker 3: That's a lot. 172 00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:17,680 Speaker 2: And I think it's so admirable and I'm sure that 173 00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:20,679 Speaker 2: the people who are listening today are just like, Wow, 174 00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:25,520 Speaker 2: she still chose Jesus even in this like God took 175 00:10:25,559 --> 00:10:28,560 Speaker 2: away like the one thing that I would say is 176 00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:30,439 Speaker 2: like the most unfair thing. 177 00:10:30,360 --> 00:10:33,760 Speaker 3: To take away and it's like she still chooses him. 178 00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:36,880 Speaker 2: I'm wondering if you can maybe break that down of 179 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:40,440 Speaker 2: just like, was that an easy decision for you to 180 00:10:40,559 --> 00:10:43,800 Speaker 2: continue to trust God? Did you have moments where you 181 00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:49,000 Speaker 2: wavered with faith or with doubt? And for those today 182 00:10:49,040 --> 00:10:52,480 Speaker 2: who maybe are in that place of like God, how 183 00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:56,360 Speaker 2: could I ever trust you again after you allowed this 184 00:10:56,520 --> 00:10:59,280 Speaker 2: to happen. I know that's like a threefold question, but 185 00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:00,719 Speaker 2: I would just love to throw it back to you 186 00:11:00,880 --> 00:11:03,320 Speaker 2: to to speak to all of that, because that is 187 00:11:03,679 --> 00:11:07,520 Speaker 2: to lose something so good and to still view God 188 00:11:07,559 --> 00:11:10,760 Speaker 2: as good and choose him in the grief, that's that 189 00:11:10,880 --> 00:11:13,960 Speaker 2: is a hard place for a lot of people to 190 00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:15,840 Speaker 2: continue to cling onto. 191 00:11:15,960 --> 00:11:19,480 Speaker 1: M Yeah, it's a fight, but it's a fight where 192 00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:23,080 Speaker 1: it's showing up for So if, if whoever is listening 193 00:11:23,080 --> 00:11:24,840 Speaker 1: to this, if you feel like you're out on the 194 00:11:24,880 --> 00:11:27,320 Speaker 1: fringes and you don't know if you're gonna make it, 195 00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:31,400 Speaker 1: I want to encourage you with this. What I felt was, 196 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:34,320 Speaker 1: you know what, I've already lost everything. I was like, 197 00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:37,800 Speaker 1: what's more there to lose? And I, Kirby, I was 198 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:42,400 Speaker 1: in this place of complete and utter desperation. And when 199 00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:46,280 Speaker 1: you're that far out on the fringes. It's like, okay, God, 200 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:49,680 Speaker 1: I mean, and I say this with like umph in 201 00:11:49,760 --> 00:11:53,360 Speaker 1: my voice, because it is a wrestle. It is a fight. 202 00:11:53,559 --> 00:11:56,000 Speaker 1: It is not like something you're like, Okay, I'm gonna 203 00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:59,320 Speaker 1: trust you know. It is like I mean, it is 204 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:02,440 Speaker 1: like a girl. And like I said, a choice. Choices 205 00:12:02,480 --> 00:12:05,520 Speaker 1: are powerful in our lives. And we're the only people 206 00:12:05,679 --> 00:12:09,360 Speaker 1: that get to choose make choices for our lives. Okay, 207 00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:12,400 Speaker 1: we don't get to choose our circumstances, but we can 208 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:16,920 Speaker 1: choose what we are determined to aim our life towards. 209 00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:23,280 Speaker 1: And for me, it was this gritty, ugly and so 210 00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:28,360 Speaker 1: many days wrestle of taking God at his word. He 211 00:12:28,840 --> 00:12:31,080 Speaker 1: says he'll never leave us or forsake this. So what 212 00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:33,600 Speaker 1: did I do? I stepped all the way out on 213 00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:37,880 Speaker 1: the very fringes of death and I said, Okay, God, 214 00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:40,360 Speaker 1: I'm taking you up on your promise that you say 215 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:43,000 Speaker 1: you're never going to leave me and never forsake me. 216 00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:46,760 Speaker 1: And so with everything inside of me today, I'm choosing 217 00:12:47,120 --> 00:12:49,280 Speaker 1: to take you at your word, and I'm choosing to 218 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:52,920 Speaker 1: walk in this before I see it, before I feel it, 219 00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:55,800 Speaker 1: and before anything else in my life begins to change, 220 00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:58,960 Speaker 1: and that right there you can just like circle that 221 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:02,320 Speaker 1: it is this small space that no one's gonna do 222 00:13:02,480 --> 00:13:05,240 Speaker 1: for you, that we have to just show up and 223 00:13:05,280 --> 00:13:10,439 Speaker 1: go God, I'm giving you. I'm literally laying my life 224 00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 1: down because turns out I'm not in control. I'm not 225 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:17,040 Speaker 1: in control like I thought. I had it all down. 226 00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:20,480 Speaker 1: I was living my dream life and then one phone 227 00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:27,480 Speaker 1: call interrupted everything. My whole trajectory had been rerouted and changed. 228 00:13:28,280 --> 00:13:32,880 Speaker 1: But that's not the end of the story. And what 229 00:13:33,040 --> 00:13:37,280 Speaker 1: we go through. God is faithful to walk with us. 230 00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:40,880 Speaker 1: He's not afraid of the wrestle, he's not afraid of 231 00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:43,720 Speaker 1: the questions, he's not afraid of the mess. There were 232 00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:48,080 Speaker 1: some very very messy days and being now a widowed, 233 00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:51,920 Speaker 1: single mom of three kids, wondering if I had any 234 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:54,720 Speaker 1: life in front of me, and God is like one 235 00:13:54,760 --> 00:13:58,960 Speaker 1: step out of time. One literally we don't have to 236 00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:01,800 Speaker 1: have it all figured out, but He is asking us 237 00:14:01,840 --> 00:14:04,440 Speaker 1: to hold him, take him by the hand, and take 238 00:14:04,480 --> 00:14:08,360 Speaker 1: that next step. And all we have to do is 239 00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:12,000 Speaker 1: show up for the next step and take that step, 240 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:14,120 Speaker 1: and then He's going to lead us to the next step. 241 00:14:14,440 --> 00:14:17,480 Speaker 1: And so you know, it's kind of it's this process 242 00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:21,440 Speaker 1: of renewing your renewing your mind every five minutes, reminding 243 00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:24,960 Speaker 1: yourself that God, you are with me, You're never going 244 00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:27,280 Speaker 1: to leave me or forsake me. Your plans and your 245 00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:31,720 Speaker 1: purposes are greater than mine. You have plenty, You're not 246 00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:35,560 Speaker 1: surprised by anything I'm going through. And you're going to 247 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:38,680 Speaker 1: take care of not just me, but my children. You know. 248 00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:40,480 Speaker 1: He says that he's going to be a father to 249 00:14:40,520 --> 00:14:45,800 Speaker 1: the fatherless. And I banked everything I had on that 250 00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:50,480 Speaker 1: Kirby and I watched God do miracle after miracle after 251 00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:55,080 Speaker 1: miracle in our lives and this book and she got 252 00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:58,640 Speaker 1: up did not come from an overnight fix or any 253 00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:01,880 Speaker 1: kind of quick fix at all. It came from thirteen 254 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:06,320 Speaker 1: years of walking through the fire and coming out with 255 00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:10,800 Speaker 1: it being tested, tried and true. Like my faith grew 256 00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:14,440 Speaker 1: legs and the fire it was the buyer with it 257 00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:19,080 Speaker 1: changed everything. And what I believe in Jesus to be 258 00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:23,920 Speaker 1: turns out he is everything he promised and more. And 259 00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:25,920 Speaker 1: I mean I'm standing at it today, it's like this 260 00:15:25,960 --> 00:15:30,000 Speaker 1: isn't like restoration. Isn't just this big bow that comes 261 00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:32,680 Speaker 1: you know, And then it's like Okay, well, now all 262 00:15:32,760 --> 00:15:36,560 Speaker 1: is well. You know, it's a daily walking and surrender 263 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:41,120 Speaker 1: and believing that God is it is still writing your 264 00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:44,800 Speaker 1: story and he's continuing to restore with the locust of 265 00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:48,600 Speaker 1: eaten And yeah, we could go on and not. 266 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:52,960 Speaker 3: But no, I think that's that's so encouraging. 267 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:54,920 Speaker 2: Even the verse that you brought up of just God 268 00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:58,200 Speaker 2: being a father to the fatherless, like I remember, you know, 269 00:15:58,280 --> 00:16:01,480 Speaker 2: on the reverse end of being the child who lost 270 00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:04,000 Speaker 2: their father at a young age. I was ten years 271 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:06,960 Speaker 2: old when my dad died, and it wasn't until I 272 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:10,360 Speaker 2: was fourteen years old that I got saved and had 273 00:16:10,400 --> 00:16:13,960 Speaker 2: a relationship. I was pursuing a relationship with God, and 274 00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:18,920 Speaker 2: I remember that verse became so real to me when 275 00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:22,200 Speaker 2: God became real to me, you know, and not just 276 00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:24,280 Speaker 2: like as a concept, but like he exists, like he 277 00:16:24,440 --> 00:16:28,800 Speaker 2: is real. And knowing that I had a perfect and 278 00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:34,360 Speaker 2: present father who loves me like God, that I mean, 279 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,920 Speaker 2: that instilled such a confidence in me in the loss, 280 00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:41,920 Speaker 2: in the suffering, in every situation I was going through, 281 00:16:41,920 --> 00:16:45,800 Speaker 2: not just the grief of my own dad, but even 282 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:46,520 Speaker 2: the grief that. 283 00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:49,280 Speaker 3: Hard seasons bring like yeah, hard season bring. 284 00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:51,920 Speaker 2: Yes, of okay, God, Like this is who you say 285 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:54,840 Speaker 2: you are. I'm gonna put my hope in that in 286 00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:59,200 Speaker 2: your character over my circumstance and trust because you've been 287 00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:02,120 Speaker 2: faithful through your You've been faithful to all these people 288 00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:04,960 Speaker 2: who have testified of your goodness even in the heart. 289 00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:08,040 Speaker 2: And I'm gonna have to take that step of faith 290 00:17:08,359 --> 00:17:11,760 Speaker 2: to trust. Not take a step and be strong and 291 00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:13,840 Speaker 2: hold it all together, but take a step of faith 292 00:17:13,920 --> 00:17:16,800 Speaker 2: and trust in surrendering to you that you are the 293 00:17:16,840 --> 00:17:19,399 Speaker 2: strong one God, that you are my father, that you 294 00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:23,240 Speaker 2: are the one who will will show up in these 295 00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:26,720 Speaker 2: moments where I, as your child, cannot do it. And 296 00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,439 Speaker 2: it's like, as much as God is a father to 297 00:17:28,560 --> 00:17:32,080 Speaker 2: your children like Courtney, he is your father as well 298 00:17:32,119 --> 00:17:32,880 Speaker 2: in showing up. 299 00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:35,120 Speaker 3: For you and your grief. And I think. 300 00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:38,159 Speaker 2: Exactly that's a testament in and of itself that you know, 301 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:41,800 Speaker 2: Christ being our bridegroom shows up for you his bride, 302 00:17:41,840 --> 00:17:45,600 Speaker 2: like God being our father shows up for you as 303 00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:46,359 Speaker 2: a father. 304 00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:47,880 Speaker 3: The Holy Spirit. 305 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:50,640 Speaker 2: Being our comforter, shows up for you as our comforter 306 00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:54,280 Speaker 2: in these moments where we desperately need him. 307 00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:57,640 Speaker 3: He's faithful to do so yeah, but so good. 308 00:17:58,080 --> 00:18:00,760 Speaker 2: Something I do want to say is that I know 309 00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:02,840 Speaker 2: that there are people and maybe this is just because 310 00:18:02,840 --> 00:18:05,760 Speaker 2: of like the church culture they grew up in, or 311 00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:08,879 Speaker 2: like the family dynamics that they grew up in, that 312 00:18:09,119 --> 00:18:12,320 Speaker 2: there are some Christians out there who feel this pressure 313 00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:15,000 Speaker 2: of I need to be strong, I need to have 314 00:18:15,040 --> 00:18:16,680 Speaker 2: it all together like I need. 315 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:18,480 Speaker 3: You kind of said it earlier, of. 316 00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:20,720 Speaker 2: Just like okay, like you know, everything's fine, like God 317 00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:23,960 Speaker 2: is good in the middle of the suffering. But the 318 00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:28,720 Speaker 2: reality is is that suffering and loss and disappointment in 319 00:18:28,760 --> 00:18:33,360 Speaker 2: these seasons that shatter us, shatter Usa. So I'm wondering 320 00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:37,639 Speaker 2: for you, how how have you been able to navigate 321 00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:42,480 Speaker 2: the tension between holding onto grief but also holding onto 322 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:47,439 Speaker 2: faith because both coexist, like the real shattering and the 323 00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:50,520 Speaker 2: real like I am not well God, but like the 324 00:18:51,119 --> 00:18:52,080 Speaker 2: assured faith. 325 00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:53,120 Speaker 3: How have you been able to. 326 00:18:53,119 --> 00:18:56,240 Speaker 2: Hold onto both and navigate both and not just lean 327 00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:59,119 Speaker 2: into one or lean into the other, or or I 328 00:18:59,160 --> 00:19:01,720 Speaker 2: don't know, had one or gas like the other. 329 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:02,360 Speaker 3: You know what I mean? 330 00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:07,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, totally. Well, they're both to be honored in your life. 331 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:11,360 Speaker 1: And the beautiful thing is we are. God has made 332 00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:14,919 Speaker 1: us by the way that He wired us. It is 333 00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:18,280 Speaker 1: so important to be able to honor both the grief, 334 00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:22,479 Speaker 1: the sorrow, and also the joy. And the beautiful thing is, 335 00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:26,600 Speaker 1: over time I have learned that they you can't have 336 00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:30,800 Speaker 1: one without the other because to know true joy, and 337 00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:33,280 Speaker 1: I'm not talking about like happy, happy clappy. I'm talking 338 00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:38,320 Speaker 1: about like true deep joy is to no sorrow because 339 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:43,960 Speaker 1: without understanding sorrow, you don't really understand and appreciate joy. 340 00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:49,560 Speaker 1: And they coexist in this sacred dance together, and they 341 00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:53,080 Speaker 1: bring such rich meaning to life. You know, it's a 342 00:19:53,160 --> 00:20:00,360 Speaker 1: wild thing that suffering can bring so much compassion and 343 00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:05,040 Speaker 1: so many different layers and purpose to our life. But 344 00:20:05,119 --> 00:20:08,400 Speaker 1: it gives us this depth, right. But the thing is, 345 00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:14,680 Speaker 1: walking walking with Jesus does not mean you don't have 346 00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:18,639 Speaker 1: bad days. And when you do walk through brokenness and 347 00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:22,760 Speaker 1: suffering and heartache, all of that has such a beautiful place. 348 00:20:22,800 --> 00:20:26,080 Speaker 1: You read through the Psalms, and if you go through 349 00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:29,600 Speaker 1: the Psalms and you read about David, in one moment, 350 00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:32,520 Speaker 1: he's like, God, I need you to protect my life. 351 00:20:33,119 --> 00:20:35,520 Speaker 1: Like you know, he's hiding in a cave because people 352 00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:38,160 Speaker 1: are out to kill him, and he's like, why are 353 00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:38,760 Speaker 1: you doing this? 354 00:20:38,840 --> 00:20:39,080 Speaker 2: God? 355 00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:41,840 Speaker 1: And then at the end of the psalm he'll say 356 00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:46,480 Speaker 1: but I praise you, oh God, because you are sovereign 357 00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:49,399 Speaker 1: and you are king, and you know He's giving this 358 00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:53,600 Speaker 1: sacrifice of praise. But that is a beautiful picture of 359 00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:58,040 Speaker 1: how we can walk with lament. And it's okay to 360 00:20:58,320 --> 00:21:03,720 Speaker 1: to not always love your life and your circumstances. Now, 361 00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:06,040 Speaker 1: there are things that we can find to be grateful 362 00:21:06,119 --> 00:21:10,960 Speaker 1: for in every season, but some seasons it's a it's 363 00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:13,480 Speaker 1: a it's such a struggle, And I just want to 364 00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:18,200 Speaker 1: say there is no shame in going through hard things 365 00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:22,320 Speaker 1: and expressing it. You know, we need to lament. There's 366 00:21:22,359 --> 00:21:27,800 Speaker 1: something holy and fortifying in our life when we lament, 367 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:31,800 Speaker 1: and we do, and this can be in the form 368 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:35,520 Speaker 1: of writing it down something for me that helps so 369 00:21:35,720 --> 00:21:38,520 Speaker 1: much in the season instead of just brush trying to 370 00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:41,719 Speaker 1: brush everything under the rug, which is not possible, by 371 00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:44,880 Speaker 1: the way, because if you try to stuff grief, it 372 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:48,760 Speaker 1: will come out somewhere else in your life at some point. 373 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:51,000 Speaker 1: It's kind of like whack them all that game. You 374 00:21:51,040 --> 00:21:52,960 Speaker 1: know that things are going to pop up and you 375 00:21:53,119 --> 00:21:55,359 Speaker 1: think you get it down, but it's gonna pop right 376 00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:57,919 Speaker 1: up in another spot. It's kind of similar to that. 377 00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:01,800 Speaker 1: So how do we walk with this? You know. I 378 00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:04,840 Speaker 1: love you, Lord and I want to serve you, but 379 00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:07,879 Speaker 1: this is terrible and I hate this. You know, like, 380 00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:10,640 Speaker 1: how do you hold both of those? Lamenting has such 381 00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:14,040 Speaker 1: a place in such a purpose and practical ways we 382 00:22:14,040 --> 00:22:17,959 Speaker 1: can do that is journaling out I would write and 383 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:19,920 Speaker 1: write it as if like no one's ever going to 384 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:23,320 Speaker 1: see that, and they don't have to write it out right. 385 00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:27,040 Speaker 1: God already knows our thoughts, which is so freeing and 386 00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:30,000 Speaker 1: such a beautiful thing to know that He made us, 387 00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:33,240 Speaker 1: He created us, he knows us, He loves us. He's 388 00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:36,360 Speaker 1: not afraid of our heartache, He's not afraid of our 389 00:22:37,240 --> 00:22:42,200 Speaker 1: of our lament and our sorrow. In fact, he wants us. 390 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:46,560 Speaker 1: There's something he has for us, a treasure in the 391 00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:49,359 Speaker 1: dark that he wants us to grab hold of. In 392 00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:53,640 Speaker 1: that Another thing is fine, a couple of trusted friends 393 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:56,560 Speaker 1: that are committed to following Jesus that you can you 394 00:22:56,600 --> 00:22:59,359 Speaker 1: can share things with and say, you know, will you 395 00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:02,880 Speaker 1: be commit to pray for me in this season, Ask 396 00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:05,800 Speaker 1: for prayer, ask for help, because at the end of 397 00:23:05,840 --> 00:23:08,639 Speaker 1: the day, we need each other and we are not 398 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:14,639 Speaker 1: called as believers to walk around stuffing everything, hiding or 399 00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:18,240 Speaker 1: pretending that we're okay when we're not, because it's really 400 00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:22,520 Speaker 1: okay to not be okay, And they're just there are days, 401 00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:24,560 Speaker 1: I don't you know, I've been following Jesus for over 402 00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:30,280 Speaker 1: thirty years now, and they're just they're seasons that come 403 00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:33,359 Speaker 1: with that. Some seasons you feel like you are on 404 00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:38,359 Speaker 1: a mountaintop and you are just wide open receiving, you know, 405 00:23:38,520 --> 00:23:41,359 Speaker 1: just so much, just buckets of joy. And there are 406 00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:45,080 Speaker 1: other seasons you are crawling on the valley floor and 407 00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:48,879 Speaker 1: you are holding on for dear life. And the beautiful 408 00:23:49,040 --> 00:23:54,000 Speaker 1: thing is that sometimes there's just moments that they both collide, 409 00:23:54,160 --> 00:23:59,160 Speaker 1: and that coexisting is such a sweet and sacred place. 410 00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:02,879 Speaker 3: To live in, beautifully said. 411 00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:06,160 Speaker 2: And I think like the beautiful thing about seasons, like 412 00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:09,359 Speaker 2: like you mentioned, is that when we even think about 413 00:24:09,359 --> 00:24:13,040 Speaker 2: like seasons that we're in right now, it's like right now, 414 00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:15,199 Speaker 2: at the time that we are filming this and that 415 00:24:15,280 --> 00:24:18,000 Speaker 2: this episode is going out, it'll be February, so it's. 416 00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:20,840 Speaker 3: Still winter at least here like in the West. 417 00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,040 Speaker 2: I know, I live all over the world that are 418 00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:25,760 Speaker 2: probably like, girl, it's our summertime here in Australia. 419 00:24:25,400 --> 00:24:29,080 Speaker 3: Or whatever, well in America right now it is winter. 420 00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:33,480 Speaker 2: And it is cold, and maybe that's the season that 421 00:24:33,520 --> 00:24:37,040 Speaker 2: you are in where it just feels cold and dead 422 00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:40,680 Speaker 2: and you don't want to get out there and drive 423 00:24:40,760 --> 00:24:43,359 Speaker 2: to work because you're afraid of slipping on ice. Like 424 00:24:44,119 --> 00:24:47,600 Speaker 2: I get that I've talked about this time and time again. 425 00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:50,040 Speaker 2: I feel like you're on the podcast, so forgive me 426 00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:52,440 Speaker 2: for being a broken record if you've been a loyalistener. 427 00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:55,560 Speaker 2: But I feel like I was in a like a 428 00:24:55,800 --> 00:25:00,359 Speaker 2: long dark winter for a very long time, in my. 429 00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:02,800 Speaker 3: Grief, in my sorrow, even though joy met me in 430 00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:04,720 Speaker 3: those times. It's like I think about in the wintertime, 431 00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:07,560 Speaker 3: what do we celebrate. We celebrate Christmas, like we celebrate the. 432 00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:10,480 Speaker 2: New Year, Like there are these moments of celebration and 433 00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:15,000 Speaker 2: joy in a season where it's cold and dead. But 434 00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:18,439 Speaker 2: the thing about seasons and that we see in scripture 435 00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:22,800 Speaker 2: and in life and in nature is that they change 436 00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:26,040 Speaker 2: and they and they serve a purpose at the same time. 437 00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:30,879 Speaker 2: It's like the frozen ice water melts and waters the 438 00:25:30,920 --> 00:25:34,800 Speaker 2: ground to bring about something new in the spring. And 439 00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:36,720 Speaker 2: I feel like that's the season of life that I'm 440 00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:38,119 Speaker 2: in right now. Like I feel like I'm in my 441 00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:41,920 Speaker 2: spring where it's like God is just allowing new things 442 00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:45,440 Speaker 2: to bloom and blossom that I didn't know were buried 443 00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:47,840 Speaker 2: deep underneath that He was actually. 444 00:25:47,600 --> 00:25:50,359 Speaker 3: Planting and working on. And so I think that's the 445 00:25:50,440 --> 00:25:51,040 Speaker 3: hope in. 446 00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:55,800 Speaker 2: Seasons of suffering and lament, is that one joy, like 447 00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:58,960 Speaker 2: you said, can show up literally right in the middle 448 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:03,040 Speaker 2: of it. But also it can lead to something. It 449 00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:05,879 Speaker 2: can you're the tears that you that you weep in 450 00:26:05,920 --> 00:26:09,040 Speaker 2: your lament can water what's going to be restored and 451 00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:11,800 Speaker 2: brought to life in the next season, whether it's the 452 00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:14,520 Speaker 2: same thing or whether it's something completely different. I'm not 453 00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:17,560 Speaker 2: saying that, you know, for the for the person who's 454 00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:20,560 Speaker 2: lost someone, that that person is gonna come back or 455 00:26:20,680 --> 00:26:22,960 Speaker 2: God's gonna send someone to just replace them. 456 00:26:23,160 --> 00:26:24,800 Speaker 1: Totally. You can't replace them. 457 00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:27,199 Speaker 3: You can't replace and I know you get that. 458 00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:30,879 Speaker 2: And but at the same time, God can still bring 459 00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:33,040 Speaker 2: good things right. 460 00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:34,840 Speaker 3: Where things were taken. 461 00:26:34,600 --> 00:26:35,800 Speaker 1: Away, That's right. 462 00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:36,920 Speaker 3: So I think that's just. 463 00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:40,639 Speaker 2: The beautiful thing about loss in lament is also, like 464 00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:45,040 Speaker 2: your book talks about the restoration and the renewal and 465 00:26:45,080 --> 00:26:48,360 Speaker 2: the gifts that actually can come out of those places 466 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:49,360 Speaker 2: that we never. 467 00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:53,600 Speaker 3: Knew could could lead to something fruitful. And beautiful. 468 00:26:54,800 --> 00:26:56,720 Speaker 2: But with that, I know we're getting closer towards the 469 00:26:56,800 --> 00:26:58,520 Speaker 2: end of our episode. I just want to throw one 470 00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:00,640 Speaker 2: last question to you and then we can and tell 471 00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:02,520 Speaker 2: everyone about your book and where to get at. 472 00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:03,199 Speaker 3: All the good things. 473 00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:05,919 Speaker 2: But for the person who's listening right now, who is 474 00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,200 Speaker 2: in the middle of their grief today, who just feels 475 00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:11,280 Speaker 2: like they are on the ground, like watering the earth 476 00:27:11,320 --> 00:27:14,240 Speaker 2: with their tears, what would you say to remind them 477 00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:17,840 Speaker 2: that they have this permission to get up and that 478 00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:19,840 Speaker 2: there is going to be a season and a time 479 00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:20,600 Speaker 2: to get up. 480 00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:22,360 Speaker 3: I would love for you to just like speak to that. 481 00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:25,280 Speaker 1: Yes, I want to. If that is you and your 482 00:27:25,320 --> 00:27:28,600 Speaker 1: knees are to the earth and you are weeping, it 483 00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:32,280 Speaker 1: says the scripture says, weeping may endure for the night, 484 00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:37,879 Speaker 1: but joy comes in the morning. My friend, if you 485 00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:41,280 Speaker 1: are on the ground, don't despise this part of the 486 00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:45,639 Speaker 1: journey because it is such a beautiful and critical It 487 00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:49,560 Speaker 1: may not look beautiful, yet, my friend, it is crucial 488 00:27:49,640 --> 00:27:52,800 Speaker 1: for where you're headed. It is a necessary part of 489 00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:57,959 Speaker 1: the process for what God has in store for your life. 490 00:27:58,359 --> 00:28:01,080 Speaker 1: And I'm telling you his plans are higher. His plans 491 00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:03,840 Speaker 1: are greater. There are many mysteries in this life. Will 492 00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:08,240 Speaker 1: never understand fully why. But I want you to keep 493 00:28:08,440 --> 00:28:12,200 Speaker 1: moving forward and moving ahead. Open up the word, take 494 00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:15,080 Speaker 1: God at his word, hold on to his promises like 495 00:28:15,119 --> 00:28:19,720 Speaker 1: it's your life, because it is, and watch him restore 496 00:28:20,440 --> 00:28:23,880 Speaker 1: and bring to life things that you never could imagine. 497 00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:27,560 Speaker 1: I broke up the book in four different parts, and 498 00:28:27,680 --> 00:28:30,080 Speaker 1: it's it's a first hand account of my journey. So 499 00:28:30,119 --> 00:28:32,800 Speaker 1: it's going to read like a memoir reads. It's going 500 00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:35,480 Speaker 1: to read like a maybe even a novel would read. 501 00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:38,080 Speaker 1: But it's you're going to feel like you're with me 502 00:28:38,240 --> 00:28:43,720 Speaker 1: in my journey. And it's the breaking, the making, the rising, 503 00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:49,080 Speaker 1: and the sending. The tears that you are weeping now 504 00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:53,600 Speaker 1: are going to become life for the people behind you. 505 00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:55,360 Speaker 1: You don't have to see it, you don't have to 506 00:28:55,440 --> 00:29:01,080 Speaker 1: understand it yet, but just remain in Jesus, remain in 507 00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:05,200 Speaker 1: his truth, and he will be faithful to take you 508 00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:08,280 Speaker 1: by the hand. He will give you glimmers of light 509 00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:12,400 Speaker 1: right when you need them and hope to hold on to, 510 00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:14,800 Speaker 1: to lead you through the darkest night, to get you 511 00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:18,200 Speaker 1: up on your feet, and really send you out in 512 00:29:18,280 --> 00:29:21,200 Speaker 1: a life of purpose that you never thought would be 513 00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:26,320 Speaker 1: would be possible. The beautiful thing is God has a 514 00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:32,280 Speaker 1: specialty and turning impossibilities into possibilities. And friend, I just 515 00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:34,720 Speaker 1: want to say, he has more for your life than 516 00:29:34,760 --> 00:29:38,920 Speaker 1: you can imagine. So trust him and keep trusting him, 517 00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:42,600 Speaker 1: and keep trusting him, and he is going to do 518 00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:47,440 Speaker 1: more than you could ever imagine. And God bless you 519 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:51,200 Speaker 1: because I'm just saying what we go through, none of 520 00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:54,680 Speaker 1: it is wasted. There's not one part of my journey, 521 00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:59,920 Speaker 1: one part that goes out to the curb. For way 522 00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:04,400 Speaker 1: everything in our lives. God is going. He is able, 523 00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:07,200 Speaker 1: and He is going to repair the broken pieces and 524 00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:11,200 Speaker 1: make something more beautiful then you could dream, not just 525 00:30:11,280 --> 00:30:13,920 Speaker 1: for you, but for the life of those behind you. 526 00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:17,560 Speaker 2: I mean, it's not wasted for you, it's not wasted 527 00:30:17,600 --> 00:30:20,240 Speaker 2: for the generations coming after you. And like that's literally 528 00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:23,520 Speaker 2: your book is literally living proof of that, that it 529 00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:26,760 Speaker 2: is something that God repurposed not only for good in 530 00:30:26,840 --> 00:30:30,239 Speaker 2: your life, in your family's life, but also in the 531 00:30:30,280 --> 00:30:32,520 Speaker 2: lives of the many people who will pick up your 532 00:30:32,520 --> 00:30:36,120 Speaker 2: book and need that hope as well. But speaking of which, 533 00:30:36,280 --> 00:30:39,840 Speaker 2: the book is literally out today, so where people grab 534 00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:42,040 Speaker 2: their copy if they want to listen to it or 535 00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:45,800 Speaker 2: read it like audio digital however physical. 536 00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:50,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, all the different formats are available, so you can 537 00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:52,000 Speaker 1: go to wherever you like to buy books. You can 538 00:30:52,040 --> 00:30:57,400 Speaker 1: go to Amazon, Walmart, Target Books a Million, Barnes and Noble, Spotify, 539 00:30:57,600 --> 00:31:00,840 Speaker 1: you can go. The audiobook will be on there on audible. 540 00:31:01,640 --> 00:31:04,880 Speaker 1: At Courtneyprayduke dot com. You can find all kinds of 541 00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:10,480 Speaker 1: information book related around my life and what God is doing. 542 00:31:10,600 --> 00:31:13,480 Speaker 1: And there's also links that you can purchase on there. 543 00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:14,720 Speaker 3: Amazing. 544 00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:17,560 Speaker 2: Well, y'all go check out her book again. It is 545 00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:21,400 Speaker 2: called and She Got Up by my friend Courtney pray Duke. 546 00:31:21,440 --> 00:31:24,640 Speaker 2: It's available today. And thank you Courtney one for being 547 00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:28,720 Speaker 2: faithful to write this and being strong enough and obedient 548 00:31:28,800 --> 00:31:31,320 Speaker 2: to write this. But thank you for also just taking 549 00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:33,520 Speaker 2: the time to be here and to speak to my 550 00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:36,680 Speaker 2: people and to just share your story with them glimpses 551 00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:40,360 Speaker 2: of it and bits of your book as well. Yes, 552 00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:44,080 Speaker 2: to everybody who is listening and has tuned in thus far, 553 00:31:44,240 --> 00:31:46,160 Speaker 2: thank you for listening to the episode. 554 00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:47,680 Speaker 3: I pray that it was an. 555 00:31:47,680 --> 00:31:50,120 Speaker 2: Encouragement to you and that you feel like you too 556 00:31:50,640 --> 00:31:53,920 Speaker 2: can get up and move forward in the restorative work 557 00:31:54,000 --> 00:31:56,200 Speaker 2: that God wants to do in your story, the purposed 558 00:31:56,240 --> 00:31:58,280 Speaker 2: work that He wants to do in your story, especially 559 00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:02,640 Speaker 2: in the places where grief has really just felt like 560 00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:05,120 Speaker 2: the final word. But how many of us know that 561 00:32:05,240 --> 00:32:06,400 Speaker 2: Jesus has a final word? 562 00:32:06,680 --> 00:32:07,000 Speaker 3: Amen? 563 00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:08,240 Speaker 1: Ray, Amen girl. 564 00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 3: All right, Well, thank y'all. 565 00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:12,320 Speaker 2: For listening to this week's episode again. Pray that it 566 00:32:12,400 --> 00:32:14,680 Speaker 2: blessed y'all, and I will see you here next week 567 00:32:14,760 --> 00:32:17,560 Speaker 2: with another episode here on the bottom Beloved Podcast. 568 00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:19,600 Speaker 3: But until next time, I love you. Boe. 569 00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:24,920 Speaker 2: For more life giving, faith based podcast just like this one, 570 00:32:25,080 --> 00:32:28,160 Speaker 2: check out lifeaudio dot com, a proud partner of the 571 00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:29,560 Speaker 2: Botton Beloved Podcast.