1 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:08,280 Speaker 1: Life Audio. And so that's what Jesus is offering you. 2 00:00:09,280 --> 00:00:13,280 Speaker 2: He's offering you this kindness, this goodness, this faithfulness, this love, 3 00:00:13,400 --> 00:00:17,840 Speaker 2: this joy, this peace, and that will never ever be 4 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:18,880 Speaker 2: found in alcohol. 5 00:00:19,079 --> 00:00:19,800 Speaker 1: It just won't. 6 00:00:21,160 --> 00:00:24,280 Speaker 3: Welcome to Love Life Sober. I'm your host and your coach, 7 00:00:24,440 --> 00:00:27,440 Speaker 3: Christy Osborne. This podcast is for the woman who loves 8 00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:30,440 Speaker 3: Jesus or is longing to reconnect with him, and who 9 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:33,519 Speaker 3: knows deep down that alcohol is no longer serving her. 10 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:36,639 Speaker 3: Here we talk honestly, with grace and truth about how 11 00:00:36,680 --> 00:00:40,560 Speaker 3: stepping away from alcohol opens the door to the love, joy, 12 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:44,560 Speaker 3: peace and connection you've been searching for. Because, Babe, those 13 00:00:44,600 --> 00:00:46,480 Speaker 3: things were never meant to be found in a bottle 14 00:00:46,520 --> 00:00:47,080 Speaker 3: of wine. 15 00:00:47,159 --> 00:00:48,360 Speaker 4: They're found in Jesus. 16 00:00:48,880 --> 00:00:52,280 Speaker 3: Through scripture, coaching and neuroscience, I'll help you make sense 17 00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:55,280 Speaker 3: of your habits, your nervous system, and what you're really 18 00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:59,120 Speaker 3: craving so that freedom feels not only possible but sustainable. 19 00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:02,200 Speaker 3: Have to do this a long, babe, let's dive in. 20 00:01:04,959 --> 00:01:10,320 Speaker 3: I am just absolutely thrilled to tell you about today's episode. 21 00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:14,440 Speaker 3: If you are in the Love Life Sober community, you 22 00:01:14,520 --> 00:01:18,880 Speaker 3: already know Heather Borsik. If you are in Truevine, which 23 00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:22,600 Speaker 3: is our small group coaching space in the Love Life 24 00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:23,440 Speaker 3: Sober Community. 25 00:01:23,560 --> 00:01:24,920 Speaker 4: You really know Heather. 26 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:29,240 Speaker 3: She has become such an incredibly vital and important part 27 00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:33,720 Speaker 3: of our special community. Here on today's episode, she is 28 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,600 Speaker 3: telling her story not for the first time, because she's 29 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:40,720 Speaker 3: actually stood on her church stage and given her testimony, 30 00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:43,640 Speaker 3: which she posted inside our community, but she's telling it 31 00:01:43,720 --> 00:01:47,400 Speaker 3: today to the big wide world. So what happens when 32 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,840 Speaker 3: God asks you to surrender alcohol and you don't want to? 33 00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:54,000 Speaker 3: Can you love Jesus, faithfully serve and church, have a 34 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:57,720 Speaker 3: successful career and a happy family, and still quietly be 35 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:01,280 Speaker 3: struggling to stop drinking? For you, our dear friend. Heather 36 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:04,840 Speaker 3: convinced herself alcohol wasn't really a problem because her life 37 00:02:04,840 --> 00:02:08,160 Speaker 3: looked perfectly normal from the outside. She wasn't drinking every day, 38 00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:11,440 Speaker 3: she wasn't losing jobs or relationships, and she wasn't what 39 00:02:11,520 --> 00:02:15,480 Speaker 3: she considered a quote unquote alcoholic was. But deep down 40 00:02:15,880 --> 00:02:19,160 Speaker 3: she knew something wasn't right. Every time God invited her closer, 41 00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:22,000 Speaker 3: she felt him gently ask her to lay down the 42 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:26,120 Speaker 3: one thing she simply didn't want to surrender alcohol. In 43 00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:29,760 Speaker 3: this super powerful conversation, She's going to share how grief 44 00:02:29,800 --> 00:02:34,480 Speaker 3: after losing her sister, childhood trauma, years of negative self talk, 45 00:02:34,600 --> 00:02:37,440 Speaker 3: and the quiet pull of alcohol all pointed to something 46 00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:41,480 Speaker 3: much much deeper, and what she discovered wasn't simply freedom 47 00:02:41,480 --> 00:02:44,720 Speaker 3: from alcohol. She discovered the piece that she'd been searching 48 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:48,480 Speaker 3: for all along. If you've ever thought why can't I 49 00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:51,160 Speaker 3: stop when I know God is asking me to or 50 00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:54,519 Speaker 3: I love Jesus, so why do I keep reaching for alcohol? 51 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:59,280 Speaker 3: Then this episode, my sweet dear Friend, is for you. 52 00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:02,040 Speaker 3: You can and come hang out with Heather B and 53 00:03:02,080 --> 00:03:05,360 Speaker 3: myself inside the Love Life Sober Community, and you can 54 00:03:05,440 --> 00:03:09,639 Speaker 3: also hang out with us in person and Aligned in Holland, Michigan. 55 00:03:09,919 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 4: This September. 56 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:13,000 Speaker 3: We're going to be getting together for the first ever 57 00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:17,560 Speaker 3: women's Christian Alcohol Free conference. Both links to join the 58 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:21,160 Speaker 3: community or Aligned are in the show notes. And Heather, 59 00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:23,400 Speaker 3: I just want to take two seconds to thank you. 60 00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:26,360 Speaker 3: Thank you so much for what you have meant to 61 00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:31,120 Speaker 3: me with your incredible support, helping us all as a 62 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:35,400 Speaker 3: team build this incredible space in this incredible community. I 63 00:03:35,480 --> 00:03:37,600 Speaker 3: love you so much, my sweet friend, and I'm so 64 00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:42,800 Speaker 3: proud of you. Here is Heather's episode. Hello, my beautiful friend, 65 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,160 Speaker 3: Heather how are you hi. 66 00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:48,080 Speaker 1: I'm good. I'm excited to be here. 67 00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:51,560 Speaker 2: It's like a dream to be talking to you on 68 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:57,600 Speaker 2: the podcast and just sharing my journey with being alcohol free. 69 00:03:57,920 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 2: It was like a dream I had that I didn't 70 00:03:59,840 --> 00:04:01,240 Speaker 2: think could be achieved. 71 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:05,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, right when I hit play, that is literally like 72 00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:08,200 Speaker 3: where I went in my mind is flashing back to 73 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:11,760 Speaker 3: you saying to me on a coach and call one day, 74 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:13,600 Speaker 3: wouldn't it be so cool if I could be on 75 00:04:13,640 --> 00:04:14,280 Speaker 3: the podcast? 76 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:15,920 Speaker 4: And I was like, of course you're going to be 77 00:04:15,920 --> 00:04:16,880 Speaker 4: on the podcast. 78 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:19,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, well you could see it. 79 00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:22,520 Speaker 2: I couldn't see it at the time, but I think 80 00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:25,720 Speaker 2: I knew that God wanted this freedom for me well, 81 00:04:25,839 --> 00:04:28,200 Speaker 2: and he has it for all of us. 82 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:31,280 Speaker 1: It's like this gift that he's giving. 83 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:34,480 Speaker 2: To us and whatever we're holding on to, whether it's 84 00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:40,040 Speaker 2: wine or it's you know, your relationship or any other idol, 85 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:42,680 Speaker 2: he just wants us to lay that down. 86 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:44,400 Speaker 1: And pick up the gift that He has for us. 87 00:04:44,600 --> 00:04:45,440 Speaker 1: And you taught me. 88 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:50,919 Speaker 3: That, oh same, Well, you also worked so hard at 89 00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:55,800 Speaker 3: this and like dove in headfirst, and we're such a 90 00:04:56,320 --> 00:05:00,279 Speaker 3: pleasure and just just a total blessing to be able 91 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:00,719 Speaker 3: to coach. 92 00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:02,320 Speaker 4: But how did you find me? 93 00:05:04,720 --> 00:05:07,520 Speaker 2: Well, I love this story because I had a friend 94 00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:10,640 Speaker 2: who told me that she read The Sugar Fast by 95 00:05:10,680 --> 00:05:14,880 Speaker 2: Wendy Speak she quit drinking alcohol, and I thought, oh, 96 00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:19,680 Speaker 2: I need that book. I don't really have a sugar issue, 97 00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:22,400 Speaker 2: but I definitely have a wine issue. 98 00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:25,720 Speaker 1: So she had read the book and stopped drinking. 99 00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 2: So she gave me. She actually gave me the book. 100 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:30,400 Speaker 2: And this is a really good friend of mine that 101 00:05:30,520 --> 00:05:33,040 Speaker 2: I look up to. Her faith is really strong, and 102 00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:35,800 Speaker 2: so she gave me that book. And that was in 103 00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:38,640 Speaker 2: twenty twenty four. And at the same time, you know, 104 00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:39,560 Speaker 2: I've been coming. 105 00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:42,039 Speaker 1: Out of a really really really. 106 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:43,800 Speaker 2: Dark time and I'm really going to try not to cry, 107 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:46,919 Speaker 2: which is not not been but it's okay. 108 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:50,280 Speaker 1: My sister had passed, you know, tragically. 109 00:05:50,320 --> 00:05:52,760 Speaker 2: She took her own life in twenty seventeen, and so 110 00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:56,520 Speaker 2: that my life is kind of like before she died 111 00:05:56,560 --> 00:06:00,560 Speaker 2: and after she died, and so after she passed, you know, 112 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:04,560 Speaker 2: I held her at such a high standard for my faith. 113 00:06:04,680 --> 00:06:07,800 Speaker 1: She's the reason I'm walking with Jesus at all. 114 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:12,040 Speaker 2: I was coming back kind of like a resurrection from 115 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:16,880 Speaker 2: that loss, and I just felt God tugging on me 116 00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:19,760 Speaker 2: to get closer to him, you know, to you know, 117 00:06:19,839 --> 00:06:20,640 Speaker 2: basically come. 118 00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:21,120 Speaker 1: Towards the light. 119 00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:26,160 Speaker 2: And so I knew alcohol was in the way of 120 00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:30,520 Speaker 2: truly experiencing what Jesus had for me. I just didn't 121 00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:32,039 Speaker 2: know how to let it go. It had been like 122 00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:35,000 Speaker 2: this best friend that had been through everything in my 123 00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:38,200 Speaker 2: life with me since I was probably about fourteen. I 124 00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:40,880 Speaker 2: just I knew it was something I needed to let 125 00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:42,400 Speaker 2: go of, but I didn't know how. So she gave 126 00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:45,600 Speaker 2: me this book and that was in twenty fourteen, and 127 00:06:45,839 --> 00:06:49,480 Speaker 2: I was starting to grow in my church again, started 128 00:06:49,880 --> 00:06:53,200 Speaker 2: leading Bible studies, and I really wanted to do a 129 00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:56,440 Speaker 2: women's retreat, but our church didn't hold one. So I 130 00:06:56,480 --> 00:06:59,600 Speaker 2: found this retreat called the Changed Women's Retreat, and I 131 00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:03,520 Speaker 2: did that in October of twenty twenty four and in 132 00:07:03,560 --> 00:07:07,880 Speaker 2: that weekend, you know, they talk about strongholds and you know, 133 00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:10,840 Speaker 2: where are we putting our identity in Christ or in 134 00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:14,160 Speaker 2: these other things? And I just knew God was like, 135 00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:17,160 Speaker 2: you need to lay down alcohol. And it wasn't the 136 00:07:17,160 --> 00:07:19,280 Speaker 2: first time he'd been saying this to me. It was 137 00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:23,440 Speaker 2: just so loud. And by November your book came out, 138 00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:27,240 Speaker 2: I think, and it was on Wendy's like Facebook group 139 00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:30,040 Speaker 2: or something. And because I was reading her book and 140 00:07:30,080 --> 00:07:35,200 Speaker 2: in every chapter I was writing wine wine. So I 141 00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:38,480 Speaker 2: was like, you know, I was making notes in her book, 142 00:07:38,520 --> 00:07:40,760 Speaker 2: which her book is amazing because it's just like all 143 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:44,080 Speaker 2: the things we go to in our life when we're 144 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:46,640 Speaker 2: not going to Jesus or you know, we're going to 145 00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:49,800 Speaker 2: that instead of Jesus. And so I was thinking, someone 146 00:07:49,840 --> 00:07:54,520 Speaker 2: needs to write a forty day alcohol fast, because fasting 147 00:07:54,760 --> 00:07:58,760 Speaker 2: is really how I have drawn closer to Jesus forever. 148 00:07:58,920 --> 00:08:02,040 Speaker 2: My sister taught me about people think I'm crazy. I 149 00:08:02,080 --> 00:08:05,760 Speaker 2: do twenty one day fasts almost every year, like water 150 00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:10,000 Speaker 2: fast or liquid fast, and I meet so many Christians 151 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:14,680 Speaker 2: who don't fast, and fasting is so beautiful because we're 152 00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:20,400 Speaker 2: literally surrendering our flesh to make Jesus. And when people 153 00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:23,240 Speaker 2: say like, how do you not eat? And I'm like, 154 00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:28,320 Speaker 2: because I draw on God's strength. Yeah, That's why I 155 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:30,560 Speaker 2: feel like fasting is so powerful. So I was like, 156 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,760 Speaker 2: I need someone to do a forty day alcohol fast. 157 00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:36,120 Speaker 2: I've done twenty one days, but I've never done forty days. Yeah, 158 00:08:36,679 --> 00:08:40,319 Speaker 2: not since I was pregnant or breastfeeding. Then you came 159 00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:42,240 Speaker 2: out with your book, and I was. 160 00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:47,600 Speaker 1: Like, Christy wrote this book for me, for me, and 161 00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:50,120 Speaker 1: I just devoured it. 162 00:08:50,720 --> 00:08:54,880 Speaker 2: And I wanted to do, you know, the Dry January Fast, 163 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:57,720 Speaker 2: but I just thought, oh, I don't need community, I 164 00:08:57,760 --> 00:09:00,600 Speaker 2: don't need you know, I can do this on my own. 165 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:02,360 Speaker 1: But I couldn't. 166 00:09:02,440 --> 00:09:05,880 Speaker 2: And so I joined the March Fast, the Lent Fast 167 00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:09,760 Speaker 2: last year in twenty twenty five, and I wanted to 168 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:13,880 Speaker 2: narrow in on that because Lent, you know, is leading 169 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:16,600 Speaker 2: up to Easter. And the part of my sister's story 170 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:20,560 Speaker 2: that is so devastating is that she took her life 171 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:26,800 Speaker 2: on Easter Sunday in twenty seventeen, and so that day 172 00:09:27,600 --> 00:09:30,880 Speaker 2: was like the enemy just wanted to take Easter from 173 00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:35,320 Speaker 2: me and my family and just you know, just take 174 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:39,360 Speaker 2: the goodness of God away, because you know, the focus 175 00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:42,280 Speaker 2: of Easter for so long was like it's you know, 176 00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:42,880 Speaker 2: the day. 177 00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:43,520 Speaker 1: My sister died. 178 00:09:43,640 --> 00:09:47,199 Speaker 2: It was like the worst tragedy that ever happened to 179 00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:51,440 Speaker 2: our family. And so you know, obviously it's been nine 180 00:09:51,520 --> 00:09:56,120 Speaker 2: years this coming Easter, but you know, and every year 181 00:09:56,960 --> 00:10:00,840 Speaker 2: it gets, you know, a little easier, but it never 182 00:10:01,040 --> 00:10:06,160 Speaker 2: goes away. You never forget that pain. But I didn't 183 00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:08,680 Speaker 2: want Easter to be about my sister's death. I wanted 184 00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:11,880 Speaker 2: it to be about Jesus's light and his resurrection and 185 00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:15,760 Speaker 2: his goodness. And so doing the Lent fast meant everything 186 00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:19,800 Speaker 2: to me that if I could lay down alcohol and 187 00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:23,720 Speaker 2: lift up Jesus in my life and find this freedom 188 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:27,199 Speaker 2: in the hardest season of the year for me, then 189 00:10:27,240 --> 00:10:29,960 Speaker 2: I felt like, okay, this would literally be a miracle. 190 00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:34,240 Speaker 2: And that is exactly what happened. I mean, it took, 191 00:10:34,480 --> 00:10:38,000 Speaker 2: you know, it took five growth points over several months, 192 00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:45,000 Speaker 2: but I truly found freedom by lifting up God's goodness 193 00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 2: and laying down the alcohol. That community for me, and 194 00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:53,520 Speaker 2: you know, the coaching with you and the small coaching space, 195 00:10:53,880 --> 00:10:58,120 Speaker 2: the vine, the true vine has been just so so 196 00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:01,840 Speaker 2: many pieces to the puzzle that I was missing, you know, 197 00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:05,360 Speaker 2: trying trying to let go of alcohol my own just 198 00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:06,040 Speaker 2: wasn't working. 199 00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:08,000 Speaker 1: I mean I tried it for years. You know. I 200 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:11,400 Speaker 1: tried the seventy five hard like five times. 201 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,480 Speaker 2: Because I thought, well, if I can get seventy five days, 202 00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:17,200 Speaker 2: but trying to do like ten different things all at 203 00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:20,679 Speaker 2: the same time was terrible. I failed so many times, 204 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:23,520 Speaker 2: and I had one of my other really close friends. 205 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:25,560 Speaker 1: I was like, why are you torturing. 206 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:27,000 Speaker 3: This? 207 00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:30,640 Speaker 2: Like why are you you know, why are you doing 208 00:11:30,679 --> 00:11:32,720 Speaker 2: this to yourself? And I love that in your book 209 00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:37,200 Speaker 2: you're like, babe, just do this one thing. 210 00:11:37,640 --> 00:11:42,400 Speaker 1: I will do the rest. And that has been so 211 00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:43,200 Speaker 1: so powerful. 212 00:11:43,640 --> 00:11:48,280 Speaker 3: Yeah, I just think, well, I mean so many divine things. 213 00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:52,760 Speaker 3: But the Wendy Speak thing is so cool because she 214 00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:58,200 Speaker 3: came on the Old podcast and as a guest because 215 00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:02,840 Speaker 3: I wanted to interview her about Fast and she was like, 216 00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,680 Speaker 3: I was like, I'm writing a forty day alcohol fast 217 00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,679 Speaker 3: book and she's like, oh my gosh, Okay, thank goodness. 218 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:11,960 Speaker 3: She's like, because I've been thinking about writing it, but 219 00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:14,120 Speaker 3: I didn't hear God say it was like supposed to 220 00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:16,400 Speaker 3: be me or something to that effect. She was just 221 00:12:16,559 --> 00:12:18,880 Speaker 3: like yes, and she was like and she was so 222 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:21,080 Speaker 3: sweet because she was like, can I write your forward? 223 00:12:21,559 --> 00:12:24,079 Speaker 3: And I was like what, And she's like, I would 224 00:12:24,080 --> 00:12:25,960 Speaker 3: love to write your forward because then when people go 225 00:12:26,040 --> 00:12:28,839 Speaker 3: to search for the sugar Fast, they'll find your Fast. 226 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:31,000 Speaker 3: And I was like, oh my gosh, like I had 227 00:12:31,040 --> 00:12:33,880 Speaker 3: known her for five minutes and she did that for me. 228 00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:36,720 Speaker 3: And I just think it's so cool because then. 229 00:12:36,640 --> 00:12:37,360 Speaker 4: I brought me you. 230 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:40,160 Speaker 1: I love that. 231 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:43,720 Speaker 2: I was wondering how you met her, because yeah, I 232 00:12:43,720 --> 00:12:46,560 Speaker 2: mean it, truly she led me to you one hundred percent. 233 00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:48,319 Speaker 1: That's so beautiful. 234 00:12:48,640 --> 00:12:53,600 Speaker 2: And yeah, how God leaves relationships and lives and. 235 00:12:53,679 --> 00:12:55,440 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, and just and then like look at 236 00:12:55,600 --> 00:12:58,520 Speaker 3: and then from you and now turning around and helping 237 00:12:58,600 --> 00:13:00,760 Speaker 3: lead in this community all of. 238 00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:02,840 Speaker 4: The incredible women and relationships. 239 00:13:02,880 --> 00:13:05,839 Speaker 3: And you've gotten to see two people right in the 240 00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:09,960 Speaker 3: last couple weeks in the flesh for in person hugs. 241 00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:11,600 Speaker 1: Yes, in the community. 242 00:13:11,679 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 2: Yes, I got two in person hugs. And that was 243 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:17,480 Speaker 2: just so cool. It's like meeting someone I've known my 244 00:13:17,520 --> 00:13:20,360 Speaker 2: whole life. Just I think that's where, you know, the 245 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:26,560 Speaker 2: community is so so powerful because I spent so much time, 246 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,160 Speaker 2: you know, in my own mind and my own personal 247 00:13:29,240 --> 00:13:32,640 Speaker 2: struggle with alcohol. Because the thing is is I didn't 248 00:13:32,679 --> 00:13:35,880 Speaker 2: have a rock bottom. My life wasn't falling apart. I've 249 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:38,920 Speaker 2: been married almost twenty two years, I have a career, 250 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:42,280 Speaker 2: I have a family. I you know, I'm a healthy, 251 00:13:42,840 --> 00:13:46,640 Speaker 2: generally healthy human. So you know, nine years ago when 252 00:13:46,640 --> 00:13:49,320 Speaker 2: my sister died, that's a different story. But I have 253 00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:54,760 Speaker 2: grown and become a healthy Christian and that little part 254 00:13:54,760 --> 00:13:58,160 Speaker 2: of my life that was I wasn't necessarily hiding it, 255 00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:01,640 Speaker 2: but I was hiding the struggle I was having. That's 256 00:14:01,679 --> 00:14:05,040 Speaker 2: where it's like I compared myself to you know, other 257 00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:07,960 Speaker 2: people that I knew had alcohol problems. I literally thought 258 00:14:08,040 --> 00:14:12,000 Speaker 2: that the people that didn't drink were either alcoholics or 259 00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 2: they were Mormon or some other religion that didn't allow 260 00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:20,680 Speaker 2: me alcohol because I was raised Mormon. So that is 261 00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:24,080 Speaker 2: like my background is like, okay, are you Mormon or 262 00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:28,120 Speaker 2: are you an alcoholics? So I justified my drinking for 263 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:31,000 Speaker 2: a long time because you know, there's so many Christians 264 00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:34,160 Speaker 2: that drink. Not every Christian that drinks drinks too much. 265 00:14:34,320 --> 00:14:37,800 Speaker 2: And that's where I kept having a battle with myself 266 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:42,960 Speaker 2: is that I would go to wine if I was happy, sad, grieving, mad. 267 00:14:43,520 --> 00:14:46,280 Speaker 1: And I really focused. 268 00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:49,960 Speaker 2: Last year in becoming free from alcohol on the fruits 269 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:53,800 Speaker 2: of the spirit. I wanted fruit and you and you 270 00:14:54,120 --> 00:14:56,840 Speaker 2: ask in your book, like where's the fruit? And you 271 00:14:56,880 --> 00:14:59,240 Speaker 2: know there isn't any For me, there wasn't any fruit. 272 00:14:59,280 --> 00:15:03,440 Speaker 2: I mean, yes, is fun, social drinking is fun, but 273 00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:05,880 Speaker 2: it's not fun when it leads to me crying and 274 00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:08,800 Speaker 2: telling everybody how my sister died, and that it just 275 00:15:09,080 --> 00:15:12,160 Speaker 2: ended up happening so much, you know, just or you know, 276 00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:15,040 Speaker 2: end up drinking too much and getting really. 277 00:15:14,960 --> 00:15:16,440 Speaker 1: Mad at my husband. I don't even know why. 278 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:21,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, the Bible warns us against over drinking. 279 00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:25,480 Speaker 2: You know, it causes strife, it causes debauchery, and all 280 00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:28,280 Speaker 2: kinds of things that you know are not the fruit 281 00:15:28,320 --> 00:15:31,560 Speaker 2: of the spirit. So I was looking for the love, 282 00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:37,240 Speaker 2: the peace, the joy, the patience, the goodness, the gentleness, 283 00:15:37,760 --> 00:15:41,840 Speaker 2: the faithfulness, and the self control. That's what I wanted 284 00:15:42,160 --> 00:15:45,080 Speaker 2: to see in my life. And it's been almost a 285 00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:49,560 Speaker 2: year exactly to when I started the March Fast last year, 286 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:54,920 Speaker 2: and that is when I'm experiencing. I am experiencing true joy. 287 00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:59,400 Speaker 2: I'm experiencing the Bible coming to life. I'm experiencing the 288 00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:02,280 Speaker 2: love of Jesus and the light of Jesus in my life. 289 00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:05,320 Speaker 2: And people are asking me, you know, like what what 290 00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:06,120 Speaker 2: are you doing? 291 00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:07,960 Speaker 1: Or you know, where do you go. 292 00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:12,640 Speaker 2: To church, or like like I'm acting differently, And it's honestly, 293 00:16:12,760 --> 00:16:16,280 Speaker 2: just this piece that I have that I've never read before, 294 00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:18,320 Speaker 2: the piece that I was looking for in a glass 295 00:16:18,360 --> 00:16:24,160 Speaker 2: of wine that just kept giving me more and more anxiety. Yeah, 296 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:27,480 Speaker 2: and more and more self loathing because it's like this 297 00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:30,880 Speaker 2: one thing I knew God was asking me to let 298 00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:33,240 Speaker 2: go of, and I just couldn't do it, or I 299 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:37,520 Speaker 2: wouldn't do it. I just I didn't want to do it. Yeah, 300 00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:40,800 Speaker 2: you know, it's like the Toddler pacifier. It's like having 301 00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:42,080 Speaker 2: a tantrum. I don't want to. 302 00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:42,880 Speaker 1: I don't want to. 303 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:44,080 Speaker 4: Yeah. 304 00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,760 Speaker 3: I feel like that's going to resonate with so many 305 00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:49,880 Speaker 3: listeners of I'm listening. I know this is something that I, 306 00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:52,640 Speaker 3: quote unquote should do, but I really just don't want to. 307 00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:57,000 Speaker 4: Girls, stop, don't tell me to do this. What would 308 00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:57,960 Speaker 4: you say to that gal? 309 00:16:58,000 --> 00:16:58,240 Speaker 2: Who? 310 00:16:58,320 --> 00:16:59,000 Speaker 4: I got a text me? 311 00:16:59,080 --> 00:17:01,360 Speaker 3: I literally got a text messag babe from a client 312 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,120 Speaker 3: this morning saying exactly what you just said. 313 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:06,639 Speaker 4: She was like, I just don't want to. So how 314 00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:07,640 Speaker 4: would you encourage her? 315 00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:10,800 Speaker 2: That is such a good question. I would just say, 316 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:17,439 Speaker 2: whatever you want in that wine. There is nothing more 317 00:17:18,359 --> 00:17:22,400 Speaker 2: than what you can get from Jesus, you know. I 318 00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:26,800 Speaker 2: it's so funny my sister God rest her soul like 319 00:17:26,840 --> 00:17:30,080 Speaker 2: when she found Jesus, because I said, we were raised Mormon. 320 00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:33,840 Speaker 2: We were you know, we moved to live with my dad. 321 00:17:33,880 --> 00:17:35,840 Speaker 2: We were raised by our mom. We went to a 322 00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:39,119 Speaker 2: Methodist church. But I had a very dysfunctional relationship with 323 00:17:39,280 --> 00:17:43,760 Speaker 2: faith and with alcohol. My mom, Karen, my biological mom, 324 00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:46,560 Speaker 2: who passed away in two thousand and nine, she was 325 00:17:46,920 --> 00:17:50,640 Speaker 2: like a raging alcoholic and kind of like a steady alcoholic, 326 00:17:50,720 --> 00:17:54,359 Speaker 2: but also she was later diagnosed with bipolar disorders. 327 00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:58,040 Speaker 1: So I mean, just like no model of the first 328 00:17:58,040 --> 00:17:58,600 Speaker 1: of the Spirit. 329 00:17:59,320 --> 00:18:03,879 Speaker 2: So when my sister got saved in college, she was like, 330 00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:07,359 Speaker 2: you have to meet Jesus, you have to meet Jesus. 331 00:18:07,359 --> 00:18:09,760 Speaker 2: And I was like, oh my gosh, please don't talk 332 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:10,800 Speaker 2: to me about Jesus. 333 00:18:11,760 --> 00:18:15,880 Speaker 1: And she would gently say, can I pray for you? 334 00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:20,600 Speaker 2: And that is what led me to Jesus was her 335 00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:25,639 Speaker 2: kind her kindness, and her goodness and her faithfulness. 336 00:18:26,119 --> 00:18:28,719 Speaker 1: And so that's what Jesus is offering you. 337 00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:33,680 Speaker 2: He's offering you this kindness, this goodness, this faithfulness, this love, 338 00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:38,240 Speaker 2: this joy, this peace, and that will never ever be 339 00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:41,480 Speaker 2: found in alcohol. It just won't because he has so 340 00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:45,280 Speaker 2: much more. And it's it is a surrender, It is 341 00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:49,280 Speaker 2: a laying down. It is like taking that pacifier away 342 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,080 Speaker 2: and throwing it in the trash and just not having 343 00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:55,720 Speaker 2: it be an option. I had to literally close that 344 00:18:55,880 --> 00:18:59,840 Speaker 2: door because you know, there was a little bit of time, 345 00:19:00,320 --> 00:19:02,120 Speaker 2: you know, after the Fast War. I was like, well, 346 00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:04,840 Speaker 2: I can have a glass of wine because I can. 347 00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:06,800 Speaker 1: I mean, no one's telling me I can't. 348 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:09,000 Speaker 2: Like I said, it's not like, you know, if I 349 00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:11,439 Speaker 2: touch wine again, my life's gonna fall apart. 350 00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:13,679 Speaker 1: And he's asking me not to. 351 00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:17,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, there's so much more fruit on the other side 352 00:19:18,040 --> 00:19:19,040 Speaker 2: of that, idol. 353 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:22,040 Speaker 3: Yeah, you don't have to. No one's telling you you 354 00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:24,840 Speaker 3: have to do this. I've said that to gals before. 355 00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:26,080 Speaker 3: I'm like, you don't you know, you don't have to 356 00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:31,200 Speaker 3: do this right However, however, there is so much more 357 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:33,800 Speaker 3: for you. It's for you. It's an invitation. It's a 358 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:36,280 Speaker 3: get to, not a have to, like we always talk about. 359 00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:41,600 Speaker 3: We'll be back right after a quick word from our sponsors. Hey, babe, 360 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,520 Speaker 3: I just wanted to pause us for one second to 361 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:48,560 Speaker 3: remind you that this September we are gathering in Holland, 362 00:19:48,640 --> 00:19:51,119 Speaker 3: Michigan for the Aligned Conference. 363 00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:52,240 Speaker 4: This is going to. 364 00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:58,719 Speaker 3: Be the first ever Christian women's alcohol free conference, and 365 00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:02,399 Speaker 3: I am so excited to be partnering with my friend 366 00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:06,720 Speaker 3: Sherry Hoppin of Sala House Recovery. If you've ever wished 367 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:09,160 Speaker 3: there was a place where you could talk openly about 368 00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:13,080 Speaker 3: freedom from alcohol, growing closer to Jesus, and building genuine 369 00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:16,520 Speaker 3: friendships with women who understand the journey, then this is 370 00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:23,000 Speaker 3: your opportunity. We're bringing together incredible speakers, meaningful conversations, worship, prayer, 371 00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:26,680 Speaker 3: practical tools, and plenty of opportunities to connect with women 372 00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:29,600 Speaker 3: who are pursuing freedom and living aligned with. 373 00:20:29,560 --> 00:20:31,080 Speaker 4: God's best for their lives. 374 00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:33,480 Speaker 3: One of the things I'm most excited about is that 375 00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:35,960 Speaker 3: so many women from the Love Life Sober community are 376 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,720 Speaker 3: already coming. If you've ever wanted to meet some of 377 00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:41,280 Speaker 3: those amazing women in real life and get an in 378 00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:45,480 Speaker 3: person hug and spend a few days just hanging out 379 00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:49,439 Speaker 3: with women who are alcohol free or sober, curious and 380 00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:54,240 Speaker 3: love Jesus, then this is your chance. It doesn't matter 381 00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:57,400 Speaker 3: how long you've been free from alcohol, if you are 382 00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:59,919 Speaker 3: just at the beginning of this journey or year's in, 383 00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:02,520 Speaker 3: we don't mind. We just want to get in a 384 00:21:02,600 --> 00:21:05,639 Speaker 3: room with you, and we are so so excited. All 385 00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:08,840 Speaker 3: of the details and the ticket information is all at 386 00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:12,199 Speaker 3: the link in the show notes. I am so so 387 00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:16,960 Speaker 3: excited to get to hug some of you beautiful women 388 00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:21,560 Speaker 3: in person this September. Okay, let's get back to today's episode. 389 00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:23,639 Speaker 3: You mentioned closing the door. 390 00:21:24,520 --> 00:21:26,919 Speaker 4: Tell us a little bit about what that looked like practically. 391 00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:28,560 Speaker 1: Okay, that's a good one. 392 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:31,639 Speaker 2: So I guess I started to give myself permission, Like, 393 00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:34,199 Speaker 2: if I was in a social setting, I could, you know, 394 00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:37,800 Speaker 2: smell wine, taste wine, have a glass of wine. 395 00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:39,119 Speaker 1: And I could. 396 00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:43,439 Speaker 2: But because wine is addicting in and of itself, and 397 00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:47,040 Speaker 2: this is where it gets complicated, Okay, because I don't 398 00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:50,240 Speaker 2: see myself as an addict. I didn't even see myself 399 00:21:50,280 --> 00:21:52,960 Speaker 2: as addicted to alcohol. I just felt at a really 400 00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:57,480 Speaker 2: bad habit, right because I'd go weeks without alcohol. I 401 00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:59,880 Speaker 2: didn't have alcohol every day, and I was constantly checking 402 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:03,359 Speaker 2: myself because of the history and my family with alcohol. Yeah, 403 00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:07,800 Speaker 2: was the thing I was really very, very conscientious of, 404 00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:10,200 Speaker 2: like I'm not going to end up like my mom. 405 00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:12,840 Speaker 1: That was always in the back of my mind. You know, 406 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:15,119 Speaker 1: she died at sixty four. She was a very. 407 00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:18,760 Speaker 2: Loving, kind human, but alcohol made her very angry and bitter, 408 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:22,239 Speaker 2: and I just didn't want to be that person no 409 00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:23,119 Speaker 2: matter what happened. 410 00:22:23,160 --> 00:22:23,840 Speaker 1: In my life. 411 00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:30,919 Speaker 2: I wanted to show love and kindness and forgiveness to people, 412 00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:34,080 Speaker 2: and I didn't want to be eaten up by bitterness. 413 00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:37,240 Speaker 2: So I was constantly checking myself, like, Okay, I know 414 00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:42,400 Speaker 2: I'm not addicted to alcohol, but alcohol is an addictive substance. 415 00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:45,200 Speaker 2: And I think that's where your book really opened my eyes, 416 00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:49,199 Speaker 2: because anyone could fall into the trap of the lure 417 00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:54,440 Speaker 2: and the seduction of alcohol. It is a very very 418 00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:58,200 Speaker 2: very strong tool that the enemy uses. And so when 419 00:22:58,240 --> 00:23:01,679 Speaker 2: I started opening the door again, it was like the 420 00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,919 Speaker 2: enemy just came in. And I drank more than I 421 00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:07,840 Speaker 2: wanted to. You know, I told myself I was just 422 00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:09,920 Speaker 2: gonna have one glass of wine. I had two or three. 423 00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:13,040 Speaker 2: And then really the last time I had a rule 424 00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:17,400 Speaker 2: about not drinking hard liquor, my mom Karen, always drank vodka, 425 00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:19,320 Speaker 2: and so I was like, you know, as long as 426 00:23:19,359 --> 00:23:21,600 Speaker 2: I'm not drinking vodka and I'm not drinking every day 427 00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:25,359 Speaker 2: and I'm not drinking during the day, I'm good. I 428 00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:27,760 Speaker 2: had a friend that had left some vodka in the house, 429 00:23:27,920 --> 00:23:30,439 Speaker 2: and I was like, I really just want that vodka, 430 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,160 Speaker 2: you know, like we're talking about the girls that are 431 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:34,159 Speaker 2: like I just want it. I was like, I'll just 432 00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:35,680 Speaker 2: have it. It was just like one of those little 433 00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:39,359 Speaker 2: mini bottles. Well, it really just led me to drink 434 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:42,960 Speaker 2: an entire bottle of wine after that vodka, and I 435 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:46,920 Speaker 2: woke up the next morning and I was like, I 436 00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:50,760 Speaker 2: hate myself. And that was that was the voice that 437 00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:57,440 Speaker 2: had gotten so so quiet I had. You know, anytime 438 00:23:57,480 --> 00:23:59,840 Speaker 2: I drank more than I wanted to, I would wake 439 00:23:59,920 --> 00:24:02,479 Speaker 2: up hating myself. I would wake up, you know, like 440 00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:04,720 Speaker 2: why can't you get it together? Why can't you just 441 00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:08,520 Speaker 2: have one glass of wine? Why can't you lay this down? 442 00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:12,200 Speaker 2: You know, you're a loser, You're you know, you're horrible, 443 00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:15,040 Speaker 2: You're a sinner, you know. I mean just the condemnation 444 00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:19,000 Speaker 2: was just constant when I would drink too much, and 445 00:24:19,080 --> 00:24:21,320 Speaker 2: I just was like, I'm never going to do that again. 446 00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:25,959 Speaker 2: I'm never going to exchange the love, joy and peace 447 00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:30,160 Speaker 2: that I have and the love that I have for myself. 448 00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:31,760 Speaker 1: When I'm not drinking. 449 00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:36,440 Speaker 2: I wake up every morning grateful to God. I wake 450 00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:41,320 Speaker 2: up every morning loving myself and loving my life. And yeah, 451 00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:44,360 Speaker 2: life hard. I mean, there's still so many things happening. 452 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:49,119 Speaker 2: It's not my life. Circumstances have not changed but my 453 00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:52,280 Speaker 2: behavior has changed. So instead of going to wine, I'm 454 00:24:52,280 --> 00:24:55,439 Speaker 2: going to Jesus. Instead of numbing myself, I'm going for 455 00:24:55,480 --> 00:25:02,040 Speaker 2: a walk. Instead of torturing myself, you know, I'm reading 456 00:25:02,080 --> 00:25:05,359 Speaker 2: and educating myself and filling my mind and my body 457 00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:09,640 Speaker 2: with healthy things, and so that has completely transformed my life. 458 00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:13,640 Speaker 1: I had so much negative self talk. 459 00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:16,239 Speaker 2: If anyone had told me that they were saying that 460 00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:18,359 Speaker 2: to themselves, I'd be like, you need to check yourself 461 00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:23,800 Speaker 2: into for like mental assaultment recovery, because it was just 462 00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:27,359 Speaker 2: terrible the amount of you know, self hatred I had 463 00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:30,000 Speaker 2: for you know, doing things I didn't want to do 464 00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:33,560 Speaker 2: and knowing that it wasn't providing anything for my life, 465 00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:37,239 Speaker 2: but then to keep doing it just it was like 466 00:25:37,320 --> 00:25:42,159 Speaker 2: being in this abusive relationship with myself. Yeah, in alcohol, 467 00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:44,719 Speaker 2: you know, I kind of relate alcohol to like an 468 00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:49,159 Speaker 2: abusive boyfriend, because it's like I just keep reaching for it, 469 00:25:49,359 --> 00:25:52,240 Speaker 2: keep going back to it, even though it's literally providing 470 00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:54,960 Speaker 2: me nothing. That was a radical revelation for me that 471 00:25:55,119 --> 00:25:59,560 Speaker 2: I realized that alcohol, for me and for anybody who's 472 00:25:59,640 --> 00:26:03,639 Speaker 2: question their relationship with alcohol, I truly believe it's because 473 00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:04,680 Speaker 2: the enemy. 474 00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:08,000 Speaker 1: Has an open door Yeah, when you open the bottle 475 00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:10,600 Speaker 1: of wine and not for everyone. Is it an open 476 00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:12,960 Speaker 1: door to the enemy. But if the enemy can. 477 00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:17,600 Speaker 2: Distract us, yeah, and detu us and just keep us 478 00:26:17,680 --> 00:26:21,320 Speaker 2: off track from where God is leading us, then he's winning. 479 00:26:21,800 --> 00:26:25,640 Speaker 2: I was so tired of the devil winning my heart. 480 00:26:26,359 --> 00:26:30,000 Speaker 2: Really wanted my heart to be fully surrendered to Jesus. 481 00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:32,280 Speaker 2: And for me, it was letting go of alcohol. For you, 482 00:26:32,440 --> 00:26:36,360 Speaker 2: it might be social media, or it might be you know, sugar, 483 00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:39,600 Speaker 2: it might be food, it might be porn. It might 484 00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:42,679 Speaker 2: be something as simple as you put your husband above 485 00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:47,320 Speaker 2: everything and everyone, including God. I had an amazing conversation 486 00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:49,880 Speaker 2: with a dear friend of mine when I was traveling 487 00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,680 Speaker 2: last week, and she, you know, she had that revelation 488 00:26:52,840 --> 00:26:56,200 Speaker 2: like I was holding my husband to a higher standard 489 00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:59,960 Speaker 2: than I was holding God. Whatever it is, it's whatever 490 00:27:00,240 --> 00:27:03,280 Speaker 2: we're putting our identity in that is Jesus. 491 00:27:03,359 --> 00:27:04,080 Speaker 1: That's an idol. 492 00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:05,280 Speaker 3: Yeah. 493 00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:07,840 Speaker 2: And it can be sneaky, and it can be subtle, 494 00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:10,520 Speaker 2: and it can be not even like a terrible thing. 495 00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:14,119 Speaker 2: It could be like you volunteer yourself to death. You know, 496 00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:19,000 Speaker 2: maybe you give more time to your hobby or your 497 00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:21,600 Speaker 2: work or something than you're giving to Jesus. I think 498 00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:24,240 Speaker 2: it's just anything we're putting above God. And for me 499 00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:28,480 Speaker 2: it was it was wine. It was distracting me, and 500 00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:31,960 Speaker 2: it was an open door to the enemy from my life. 501 00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:35,400 Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that you said that so much because 502 00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:39,440 Speaker 3: it's so true in that if he can just even 503 00:27:39,640 --> 00:27:41,960 Speaker 3: get us out of our prefrontal cortex right and in 504 00:27:42,040 --> 00:27:44,399 Speaker 3: the part of our brain which we're even just like 505 00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:47,639 Speaker 3: your prefrontal cortex is off lining, you can't make a 506 00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:51,560 Speaker 3: good decision like he's got a foothold, much less everything 507 00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:54,639 Speaker 3: that can happen when you know, when you have a 508 00:27:54,640 --> 00:27:58,400 Speaker 3: lot to drink. I'm just remembering like Erica Anderson, who 509 00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:01,320 Speaker 3: I interviewed early in the year, and she was talking 510 00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:05,560 Speaker 3: about she said, when she drank, she realized that the 511 00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:07,800 Speaker 3: devil didn't even have to bother with her, he could 512 00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:09,440 Speaker 3: like move on to the next person because she was 513 00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:10,600 Speaker 3: just like so distracted. 514 00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:13,120 Speaker 4: And it's such a good reminder. 515 00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:17,040 Speaker 3: We'll be back right after a quick word from our sponsors. 516 00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:20,240 Speaker 3: I want to ask about your growth points, because I 517 00:28:20,359 --> 00:28:26,679 Speaker 3: remember specifically one particular growth point where you came to 518 00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:30,320 Speaker 3: our call and you were so upset and what we 519 00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:32,640 Speaker 3: ended up mining all the data and the growth from 520 00:28:32,640 --> 00:28:35,320 Speaker 3: that growth point, and so will you just speak a 521 00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:39,560 Speaker 3: little bit to the woman who is still trying, still 522 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,600 Speaker 3: going having the growth points and how if you do 523 00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:45,720 Speaker 3: this with the right mindset as you did, like, how 524 00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:46,560 Speaker 3: those can end. 525 00:28:46,560 --> 00:28:47,320 Speaker 4: Up serving you. 526 00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:49,360 Speaker 3: I mean even the one that you just mentioned, right, 527 00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:51,440 Speaker 3: the one that with the vodka that turned in the wind. 528 00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:54,400 Speaker 3: You look at everything you learned from that and the 529 00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,600 Speaker 3: negative voices and everything that you just said, So can 530 00:28:57,640 --> 00:28:58,640 Speaker 3: you speak a little bit to that. 531 00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:02,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, I like it's kind of a fine line because 532 00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:04,400 Speaker 2: you can look at the growth points like, oh, this 533 00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:08,080 Speaker 2: has given me permission to dream right right, or you 534 00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:10,960 Speaker 2: can look at it as how can I grow from 535 00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:14,640 Speaker 2: this experience and what am I learning? Because I think 536 00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:17,400 Speaker 2: in the book you talk about, you know, like what 537 00:29:17,560 --> 00:29:20,360 Speaker 2: am I looking for in the wine? And so I 538 00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:23,880 Speaker 2: think the first growth point I had was I was 539 00:29:23,920 --> 00:29:26,640 Speaker 2: by myself. My husband had gone and my son wasn't 540 00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:30,440 Speaker 2: home either, and so I was by myself. So loneliness, 541 00:29:30,640 --> 00:29:33,800 Speaker 2: I realized was a huge trigger for me. I thrive 542 00:29:33,880 --> 00:29:38,040 Speaker 2: on being around people and relationships, and so I was 543 00:29:38,280 --> 00:29:43,280 Speaker 2: unsettled and uncomfortable being by myself. And that was one 544 00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:45,440 Speaker 2: thing that Wendy talked about in her book The Sugar 545 00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:49,720 Speaker 2: Fast was like having boundaries around don't have sugar by yourself, 546 00:29:49,720 --> 00:29:52,080 Speaker 2: And so I was like, don't have wine by myself. 547 00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:53,320 Speaker 1: That's what I told myself. 548 00:29:53,360 --> 00:29:56,560 Speaker 2: But that was the hardest one, I think, and also 549 00:29:56,640 --> 00:30:00,160 Speaker 2: where I was really questioning my drinking because why am 550 00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:03,440 Speaker 2: I having wine when I'm by myself? Because that was like, uh, 551 00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:07,960 Speaker 2: a little red flag was going off about that. So loneliness. 552 00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:12,640 Speaker 2: I really felt uncomfortable sitting in loneliness. And it was 553 00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:16,760 Speaker 2: really really good to realize that, Okay, when I'm lonely, 554 00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:20,680 Speaker 2: I'm drinking, So what could I do differently? And where 555 00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:24,320 Speaker 2: is this loneliness coming from? Yeah, and I did dig 556 00:30:24,400 --> 00:30:28,040 Speaker 2: deeper into that, and a lot of the loneliness comes from, 557 00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:30,400 Speaker 2: you know, my childhood. We were left home alone all 558 00:30:30,440 --> 00:30:34,320 Speaker 2: the time. There's a lot of fear involved in being alone. 559 00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:37,200 Speaker 1: Okay, I think that's why. 560 00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:39,280 Speaker 2: You know, my sister and brother and I had such 561 00:30:39,280 --> 00:30:40,719 Speaker 2: a strong, strong bond. 562 00:30:40,840 --> 00:30:42,240 Speaker 1: We had like a trauma bond. 563 00:30:42,840 --> 00:30:43,000 Speaker 2: You know. 564 00:30:43,040 --> 00:30:44,720 Speaker 1: We were left home alone a lot. 565 00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:47,480 Speaker 2: I mean, like really really young, Like I remember being 566 00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:50,040 Speaker 2: you know, five or six years old, and my sister 567 00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:52,960 Speaker 2: and I like trying to find food, or like one 568 00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:55,600 Speaker 2: time got in a fight and she pushed me against 569 00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:59,240 Speaker 2: this old piano in our house and my head cracked open, 570 00:30:59,600 --> 00:31:01,720 Speaker 2: and like we couldn't find our mom. There were no 571 00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:04,240 Speaker 2: cell phones, you know, like we didn't even know where 572 00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:07,560 Speaker 2: she was. And it's like, you know, like this this 573 00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:11,880 Speaker 2: fear of being alone was deep, deep, deep, and so 574 00:31:12,760 --> 00:31:16,840 Speaker 2: loneliness really led to my drinking. And so I was 575 00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:20,600 Speaker 2: able to unpack that sit in the discomfort the next 576 00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:22,800 Speaker 2: time I was alone and realized that I'm going to 577 00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:25,160 Speaker 2: be okay if I don't drink. 578 00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:27,880 Speaker 1: I could go for a walk, i can call a friend. 579 00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:32,160 Speaker 2: I can you know, journal or listen to a podcast 580 00:31:32,240 --> 00:31:35,160 Speaker 2: or meditation or just do anything differently than poor a 581 00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:39,920 Speaker 2: glass of wine. Because yeah, the wine temporarily numbed that feeling, 582 00:31:40,160 --> 00:31:43,800 Speaker 2: but it didn't help me cope, it didn't help me grow, 583 00:31:44,120 --> 00:31:44,880 Speaker 2: It didn't. 584 00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:45,920 Speaker 1: Help me heal. 585 00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:51,920 Speaker 2: And that's where wine it really stunted my healing in 586 00:31:52,160 --> 00:31:54,280 Speaker 2: so many areas of my life. I mean, I've done 587 00:31:54,320 --> 00:31:57,120 Speaker 2: a lot of therapy. I truly believe in therapy. It's 588 00:31:57,160 --> 00:32:01,200 Speaker 2: so powerful. Emd R therapy I feel like really saved 589 00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:04,680 Speaker 2: my life after my sister's death, and so it's very 590 00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:07,600 Speaker 2: very powerful, but you know, you're doing all this work, 591 00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:12,800 Speaker 2: but then still numbing all these feelings, you're not truly growing. 592 00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:15,680 Speaker 1: And so that was one obviously. 593 00:32:16,280 --> 00:32:19,640 Speaker 2: The other one was like communication with my husband, Like 594 00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:23,480 Speaker 2: we always would fight so much when I would drink 595 00:32:23,680 --> 00:32:26,360 Speaker 2: or I would drink because we were fighting. And so 596 00:32:27,320 --> 00:32:29,120 Speaker 2: I think one of my growth points was I was 597 00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:33,360 Speaker 2: really mad at my husband. I used to actually this 598 00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:36,960 Speaker 2: was years ago, Okay, not anytime, I would say eight years, 599 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:40,480 Speaker 2: but I used to when we were married early on, 600 00:32:40,640 --> 00:32:43,560 Speaker 2: I would like get mad and I would leave the 601 00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:45,680 Speaker 2: house and go to like a restaurant bar and sit 602 00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:47,840 Speaker 2: and drink to just like decompress. 603 00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:49,680 Speaker 1: But I mean, what an unhealthy behavior. 604 00:32:49,720 --> 00:32:54,240 Speaker 2: I just like escape, escape, escape, and that, yeah, that 605 00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:56,840 Speaker 2: is what I realized, Like I'm trying to escape these 606 00:32:56,880 --> 00:33:00,960 Speaker 2: feelings of conflict because again, in my childhood, there was 607 00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:03,920 Speaker 2: so much conflict. I mean, our mom was either loving 608 00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:06,040 Speaker 2: us or she was screaming at us. I mean one time, 609 00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:08,960 Speaker 2: you know, there's a lot of memories that like flipped 610 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:12,040 Speaker 2: a switch and literally kicked me down the stairs. I 611 00:33:12,080 --> 00:33:15,840 Speaker 2: mean that kind of chaos, and you know, just like 612 00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:22,520 Speaker 2: having no security as a child in safety. You know, 613 00:33:22,680 --> 00:33:26,560 Speaker 2: conflict was danger for me, so I had you know, 614 00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:29,600 Speaker 2: I've had to learn how to communicate. And you know, 615 00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:31,560 Speaker 2: my husband and I have grown so much. I mean, 616 00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:34,040 Speaker 2: we've done a lot of things. God has been so good. 617 00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:37,480 Speaker 2: We've had so many friends and mentors along the way. 618 00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:40,320 Speaker 2: I was still running to wine and I would you know, 619 00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:42,360 Speaker 2: we were talking about this on one of the coaching calls. 620 00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:46,560 Speaker 2: I think during this January fast like drinking at my husband. 621 00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:50,760 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you're gonna make me mad. I'm just gonna go, 622 00:33:51,080 --> 00:33:54,640 Speaker 2: you know, beat myself up with some wine. So every 623 00:33:54,720 --> 00:33:57,880 Speaker 2: single time I drank, I felt like I was learning something. 624 00:33:58,440 --> 00:34:02,600 Speaker 2: Why drinking? What's behind? What's underneath it? And how can 625 00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:06,840 Speaker 2: I build healthy coping strategies that are truly gonna heal 626 00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:11,800 Speaker 2: my heart and help me just be a better human? 627 00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:12,480 Speaker 1: Really? 628 00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:16,759 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's such a beautiful answer, babe. And I just 629 00:34:17,080 --> 00:34:21,240 Speaker 3: when you said using growth points as permission to keep drinking, 630 00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:25,360 Speaker 3: I think that you beautifully articulated that if you're not 631 00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:30,359 Speaker 3: learning anything new, and it's probably not a helpful growth point, 632 00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:33,480 Speaker 3: it's probably not giving you anything that's helpful if you 633 00:34:33,520 --> 00:34:34,800 Speaker 3: already know these things. 634 00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:37,760 Speaker 4: So that's like ka good. I think, you know, gauge 635 00:34:37,920 --> 00:34:38,440 Speaker 4: or whatever. 636 00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:41,200 Speaker 3: If you're having growth point saying you already know that 637 00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:44,239 Speaker 3: you're drinking, you know what I mean, drinking because of X, 638 00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:44,640 Speaker 3: Y and Z. 639 00:34:45,160 --> 00:34:47,160 Speaker 2: Also, I think one other growth point, I think it's 640 00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:51,000 Speaker 2: important to talk about this social discomfort. 641 00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:52,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, drinking or not drinking. 642 00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:56,040 Speaker 2: And then that was another reason. I just as social 643 00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:58,879 Speaker 2: as I am. I always felt like I was more 644 00:34:58,920 --> 00:35:01,719 Speaker 2: fun if I drink, yeah, or just comfortable in my 645 00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:05,840 Speaker 2: own skin. And actually I have found Yeah, it was 646 00:35:05,920 --> 00:35:09,320 Speaker 2: uncomfortable at first, but I found that I have definitely 647 00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:13,480 Speaker 2: less regrets sticky my foot in my mouth because you 648 00:35:13,520 --> 00:35:16,640 Speaker 2: have more self control with what you're saying, you know. 649 00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:18,560 Speaker 1: And I'm already very an open person. 650 00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:22,319 Speaker 2: I mean I'm very open, and you know, some people 651 00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:24,640 Speaker 2: would say to the point of a fault. You know, 652 00:35:24,719 --> 00:35:27,839 Speaker 2: sometimes our strengths can also be our weaknesses. So I think, 653 00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:30,120 Speaker 2: like verbal diarrhea. 654 00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:31,680 Speaker 1: Could come out when I'm drinking. 655 00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:35,600 Speaker 2: So you know, it's like, yeah, I drink because it 656 00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:38,440 Speaker 2: was uncomfortable to be in social situations. But I'm so 657 00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:41,239 Speaker 2: much more comfortable in my own skin now that I've 658 00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:46,640 Speaker 2: created so many data points with alcohol. So yeah, so 659 00:35:46,840 --> 00:35:50,760 Speaker 2: I think if you're not growing, it's not a growth point. 660 00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:52,719 Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, that's so so good. 661 00:35:52,960 --> 00:35:55,560 Speaker 3: And you also bring up a beautiful distinction, babe, because 662 00:35:55,640 --> 00:35:58,840 Speaker 3: I first of all, I just can't even imagine you 663 00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:02,359 Speaker 3: and me together room of both drinking, because I think 664 00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:05,360 Speaker 3: we probably would have become like best friends but also 665 00:36:06,160 --> 00:36:08,600 Speaker 3: connected in a completely different way than we have now. 666 00:36:08,840 --> 00:36:10,480 Speaker 4: Right when you're drinking. 667 00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:13,600 Speaker 3: In verbal diarrhea and everywhere, like you think you're connecting, 668 00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:16,239 Speaker 3: but that is not what true connection is based on. 669 00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:19,759 Speaker 3: Right then you end up being embarrassed and mortified and 670 00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:23,239 Speaker 3: all the other things. Whereas you, the way that you 671 00:36:23,280 --> 00:36:27,239 Speaker 3: are so open and so vulnerable in our community just 672 00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:30,799 Speaker 3: has caused you to become this leader, to have so 673 00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:33,759 Speaker 3: many people want to be your friend because of your 674 00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:36,520 Speaker 3: beautiful story and. 675 00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:37,160 Speaker 4: Your emotion babe. 676 00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:39,560 Speaker 3: Like I know that you always apologize for crying, but 677 00:36:40,320 --> 00:36:43,440 Speaker 3: I'm a crier too, and like it's heart, Like you 678 00:36:43,480 --> 00:36:46,520 Speaker 3: wear your heart on your sleeve in the most beautiful way, 679 00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:48,960 Speaker 3: And I just love you, and I just like knew 680 00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:51,120 Speaker 3: from like one of our very first calls that like 681 00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:52,480 Speaker 3: we were going to be friends forever. 682 00:36:53,520 --> 00:36:55,480 Speaker 1: Yeah I know, I know. 683 00:36:55,840 --> 00:37:00,160 Speaker 2: It's it's such a beautiful connection, and I'm just so 684 00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:00,880 Speaker 2: grateful for you. 685 00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:02,120 Speaker 1: I look up to you. 686 00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:05,520 Speaker 2: You're my mentor, you're you know, you're just so amazing. 687 00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:09,799 Speaker 2: But you're also just so real and so authentic and 688 00:37:09,840 --> 00:37:15,480 Speaker 2: so loving and kind and accepting. And I think, truly, truly, truly, 689 00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:21,839 Speaker 2: God's grace should lead us to repentance, not sinning. And 690 00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:26,080 Speaker 2: that love and that grace that you provide in your 691 00:37:26,200 --> 00:37:32,080 Speaker 2: love life sober community is truly Jesus's love. And I 692 00:37:32,120 --> 00:37:36,040 Speaker 2: think that's where we you know, we tend to really 693 00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:40,600 Speaker 2: beat ourselves up, like I was saying earlier, but I 694 00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:45,439 Speaker 2: felt the love of Jesus lead me to the light 695 00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:50,040 Speaker 2: of sobriety, and that has been such a gift. I'm 696 00:37:50,040 --> 00:37:53,359 Speaker 2: really for you and the community and your book, and 697 00:37:53,800 --> 00:37:56,920 Speaker 2: you know that you've trusted me to also be, you know, 698 00:37:56,960 --> 00:38:00,239 Speaker 2: a fast captain and to be able to encourage other 699 00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:04,080 Speaker 2: women walking in this journey has brought me so much. 700 00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:07,960 Speaker 2: It's given me a purpose and a passion. It's given 701 00:38:08,000 --> 00:38:11,120 Speaker 2: me new light on life. It's just given me so 702 00:38:11,280 --> 00:38:16,600 Speaker 2: much joy to encourage others to walk this walk, because 703 00:38:17,360 --> 00:38:19,759 Speaker 2: if we can help set the captives free, that's what 704 00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:22,040 Speaker 2: Jesus or he came to set us free. 705 00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:24,480 Speaker 1: He came to set the captives free. 706 00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:27,840 Speaker 2: And even if you're a Christian, if you're stuck and 707 00:38:27,880 --> 00:38:31,320 Speaker 2: held captive by alcohol or any other idol or addiction 708 00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:34,640 Speaker 2: or thing that is keeping you from walking in the 709 00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:37,640 Speaker 2: freedom that Jesus came for, then we are not being 710 00:38:37,680 --> 00:38:41,240 Speaker 2: the light in the world and we're not waddling Jesus 711 00:38:41,320 --> 00:38:43,160 Speaker 2: and we're not bringing people to Jesus. 712 00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:46,360 Speaker 1: Because we had a guest pastor. 713 00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:48,160 Speaker 2: At church, and I'll end with this, we have a 714 00:38:48,160 --> 00:38:51,000 Speaker 2: guest pastor at our church and he's a missionary in 715 00:38:51,040 --> 00:38:51,840 Speaker 2: another country. 716 00:38:52,440 --> 00:38:54,839 Speaker 1: And he said, I don't know where the data is. 717 00:38:54,920 --> 00:38:57,120 Speaker 2: I don't have the stats on this, but he basically said, 718 00:38:57,440 --> 00:39:03,560 Speaker 2: biggest reason for atheism is Christians because we are hypocrites. 719 00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:07,680 Speaker 2: We are not walking the walk we we are. You know, 720 00:39:07,760 --> 00:39:10,279 Speaker 2: we have pastors falling off the podium all the time 721 00:39:10,360 --> 00:39:13,040 Speaker 2: for crazy life things. 722 00:39:13,080 --> 00:39:14,959 Speaker 1: And you know, here I was. 723 00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:18,640 Speaker 2: Leading Bible studies and drinking too much wine and you know, 724 00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:22,040 Speaker 2: watching Netflix and numbing out, and so you know, if 725 00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:26,800 Speaker 2: we're not free and walking in freedom, then why would 726 00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:30,240 Speaker 2: somebody want what we have if we don't have anything 727 00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:32,160 Speaker 2: worth wanting. 728 00:39:32,280 --> 00:39:34,279 Speaker 1: Yeah, So if I'm just. 729 00:39:34,360 --> 00:39:38,320 Speaker 2: Look like every other you know, non Christian or even 730 00:39:38,400 --> 00:39:42,080 Speaker 2: every other Christian, and nothing is setting my life apart. 731 00:39:42,360 --> 00:39:44,640 Speaker 1: Then I'm not leading people to Jesus. 732 00:39:45,000 --> 00:39:47,479 Speaker 2: And the only thing I want to do with what's 733 00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:51,759 Speaker 2: left of my you know, second half of life. I'm 734 00:39:51,800 --> 00:39:55,160 Speaker 2: forty nine. I want to lead people to Jesus. I 735 00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:57,520 Speaker 2: want to be a Jesus freak. I would have never 736 00:39:57,600 --> 00:40:01,200 Speaker 2: said that in my life. I never sister was telling 737 00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:02,880 Speaker 2: me about Jesus. I was like, don't talk to me 738 00:40:02,920 --> 00:40:06,360 Speaker 2: about Jesus. And here I am. I want people to 739 00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:10,200 Speaker 2: know that Jesus is real, and his love is true, 740 00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:13,640 Speaker 2: and his light is for you, and you can love 741 00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:17,120 Speaker 2: your life free of anything because all you have to 742 00:40:17,160 --> 00:40:19,959 Speaker 2: do is lay down whatever is hindering you and pick 743 00:40:20,080 --> 00:40:22,520 Speaker 2: up the free gift. 744 00:40:21,880 --> 00:40:25,360 Speaker 1: Of freedom that he's offering you. And it's so beautiful. 745 00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:32,719 Speaker 3: Yeah, oh babe, mic drop moment in the best way, 746 00:40:32,800 --> 00:40:35,440 Speaker 3: because that is what you are doing. That is what 747 00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:39,160 Speaker 3: you're doing here right now by telling your story. That's 748 00:40:39,160 --> 00:40:41,879 Speaker 3: what you're doing every single day in the community. That's 749 00:40:41,880 --> 00:40:45,440 Speaker 3: what you're doing every single week in true vine. And 750 00:40:45,480 --> 00:40:46,720 Speaker 3: I just love you, my friend. 751 00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:49,520 Speaker 1: You're the best. You are the best. 752 00:40:50,520 --> 00:40:52,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, of course. 753 00:40:51,800 --> 00:40:55,120 Speaker 3: Okay, so, gals, come hang out with Heather and I 754 00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:58,640 Speaker 3: in the community. We have also a small group called 755 00:40:58,640 --> 00:41:00,799 Speaker 3: True Vine, which is a really special I think there's 756 00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:03,000 Speaker 3: like what twelve or fifteen of us in there, and 757 00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:07,279 Speaker 3: we meet every week for coaching and it's a really 758 00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:11,200 Speaker 3: really special place. And you can learn all about that 759 00:41:11,480 --> 00:41:12,880 Speaker 3: at the link in the show notes. 760 00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:18,359 Speaker 4: But thank you, my friend, you did it. Congratulations. I 761 00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:19,799 Speaker 4: love you. I'm so proud of you. 762 00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:24,400 Speaker 1: Thank you. My dream is a reality. 763 00:41:26,360 --> 00:41:28,760 Speaker 4: All right, girls, we will see you next week. 764 00:41:30,160 --> 00:41:32,040 Speaker 3: Thank you for spending this time with me on Love 765 00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:35,560 Speaker 3: Life Sober. If today's conversation stirred something in your heart, 766 00:41:35,719 --> 00:41:38,399 Speaker 3: don't rush past it, take it to prayer. If you're 767 00:41:38,400 --> 00:41:41,799 Speaker 3: feeling ready for deeper connection and support, I'd love to 768 00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:45,040 Speaker 3: invite you into the Love Life Sober Community, a grace filled, 769 00:41:45,280 --> 00:41:49,360 Speaker 3: shame free space where real connection grows and lasting change 770 00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:51,759 Speaker 3: takes root. You can find the link to join us 771 00:41:51,840 --> 00:41:55,320 Speaker 3: in the show notes. Love Life Sober is part of 772 00:41:55,360 --> 00:41:59,239 Speaker 3: the Life Audio podcast network, where faith centered podcasts help 773 00:41:59,280 --> 00:42:01,640 Speaker 3: you grow deeper in your walk with Christ. You can 774 00:42:01,680 --> 00:42:06,040 Speaker 3: find more faith centered podcasts at lifaudio dot com. Until 775 00:42:06,080 --> 00:42:09,560 Speaker 3: next time, be gentle with yourself, stay curious, and trust 776 00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:10,400 Speaker 3: God's promises. 777 00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:12,239 Speaker 4: He has freedom waiting for you.