1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:07,120 Speaker 1: Life Audio. I think most of us want to help people, 2 00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:09,680 Speaker 1: don't you. I want to say the right thing, offer 3 00:00:09,720 --> 00:00:12,640 Speaker 1: the right support, and respond in ways that actually help. 4 00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:16,560 Speaker 1: But without realizing it, we might offer the wrong response 5 00:00:16,720 --> 00:00:19,720 Speaker 1: to the right person simply because we're moving too fast 6 00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:23,639 Speaker 1: to truly see them. Hi, friends, I'm Jem Faddling and 7 00:00:23,720 --> 00:00:26,759 Speaker 1: this is the Unhurried Living Podcast where we inspire you 8 00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:30,600 Speaker 1: to rest deeper, live fuller, and lead better. Today I 9 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:34,440 Speaker 1: want us to slow down and explore what wise unhurried 10 00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:38,239 Speaker 1: counsel actually looks like in practice. After a word from 11 00:00:38,280 --> 00:00:50,400 Speaker 1: our sponsor, will dive into our conversation for today. As 12 00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:53,280 Speaker 1: a spiritual director and soul care coach, I care deeply 13 00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:56,160 Speaker 1: about the process and journey of other people. At the 14 00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:59,320 Speaker 1: heart of my work is a simple but essential conviction 15 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:03,200 Speaker 1: from the Book of Hebrews. God is the author and 16 00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:07,480 Speaker 1: perfector of a person's faith, which means I am not 17 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:12,040 Speaker 1: My role is not to fix people, manage outcomes, or 18 00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:16,120 Speaker 1: rush transformation. My role is to accompany others as they 19 00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:19,760 Speaker 1: walk with God. There's a much larger conversation we could 20 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:22,479 Speaker 1: have about the paradigms and practices that shape this kind 21 00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:26,000 Speaker 1: of work, But today I want to explore this dynamic 22 00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:29,400 Speaker 1: through a single verse of scripture. So let's begin right 23 00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:34,840 Speaker 1: here with first Thessalonians five fourteen, and we urge you 24 00:01:34,880 --> 00:01:38,559 Speaker 1: brothers and sisters, Warn those who are idle and disruptive, 25 00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:44,679 Speaker 1: encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone. 26 00:01:44,760 --> 00:01:48,400 Speaker 1: At first glance, this verse can feel straightforward and almost obvious. 27 00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:50,760 Speaker 1: Would be easy to gloss over it or turn it 28 00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:53,960 Speaker 1: into some kind of formula. But I believe this verse 29 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:57,960 Speaker 1: is actually wise counsel for truly seeing others and responding 30 00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:01,960 Speaker 1: in ways that support real growth. So let's take each 31 00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:05,360 Speaker 1: phrase at face value by taking a closer look at 32 00:02:05,360 --> 00:02:09,120 Speaker 1: the verbs. The first phrase is warn those who are 33 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:15,160 Speaker 1: idle and disruptive, and then encourage the disheartened, help the weak, 34 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:20,960 Speaker 1: and be patient with everyone. Each response fits the person 35 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:24,560 Speaker 1: being described, doesn't it. If someone is idle and disruptive, 36 00:02:24,639 --> 00:02:28,959 Speaker 1: a loving warning may be necessary to bring clarity and accountability. 37 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:34,760 Speaker 1: If someone is disheartened, encouragement can restore hope, encourage. If 38 00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:38,200 Speaker 1: someone is weak, they may need tangible help and not 39 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:44,520 Speaker 1: just advice or motivation. So far, this feels reasonable and compassionate. 40 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:48,399 Speaker 1: But here's where things can turn a little complicated When 41 00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:52,320 Speaker 1: hurry enters the picture, Discernment is often the first thing 42 00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:57,840 Speaker 1: we lose. If we're rushed or preoccupied or operating out 43 00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:00,040 Speaker 1: of our own anxiety, we may no longer have the 44 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:03,240 Speaker 1: capacity to see who someone really is or what they 45 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:07,880 Speaker 1: truly need, so our help might become misguided or off base. 46 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:12,560 Speaker 1: We might accidentally warn the weak, or encourage the disruptive, 47 00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:16,000 Speaker 1: or offer help to the disheartened when what they most 48 00:03:16,040 --> 00:03:20,960 Speaker 1: need is just presence. Each of these missteps can unintentionally 49 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:25,200 Speaker 1: wound rather than heal. The idle and disruptive are not 50 00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:29,960 Speaker 1: guided toward wisdom by mere encouragement or help. The disheartened 51 00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:33,839 Speaker 1: can be crushed by warning, and the weak need more 52 00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:37,760 Speaker 1: than words, and certainly they don't need pressure. This is 53 00:03:37,840 --> 00:03:40,560 Speaker 1: why this passage is not simplistic at all. It is 54 00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:44,640 Speaker 1: wisdom rooted in love. So this brings us to two 55 00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:47,680 Speaker 1: important questions for anyone who has influence in the lives 56 00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:52,120 Speaker 1: of others. Question you can ask yourself. First, am I 57 00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:54,920 Speaker 1: the kind of person who takes the time to truly 58 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:57,280 Speaker 1: see others and discern who they are and where they're 59 00:03:57,320 --> 00:04:01,360 Speaker 1: coming from? Second? Am I the kind of leader who 60 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:07,120 Speaker 1: has the inner reserve to respond appropriately in love. Unhurried 61 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:12,440 Speaker 1: leadership takes time. It requires emotional space, spiritual attentiveness, and 62 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:17,080 Speaker 1: a willingness to resist. One size fits all responses. It's 63 00:04:17,080 --> 00:04:20,120 Speaker 1: easy to get caught up in programs, strategies, and outcomes 64 00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:23,160 Speaker 1: and slowly lose sight of the actual hearts and lives 65 00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:26,320 Speaker 1: of the people we serve. A leader with the heart 66 00:04:26,360 --> 00:04:28,919 Speaker 1: of a spiritual director continues to trust the work of 67 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:31,679 Speaker 1: God in the life of the other. There is honor 68 00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:35,200 Speaker 1: for the process, respect for timing, and openness to the 69 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:40,039 Speaker 1: Spirit's guidance in each unique circumstance. This kind of leadership 70 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:44,720 Speaker 1: is less about control and more about companionship. Notice how 71 00:04:44,760 --> 00:04:49,800 Speaker 1: this verse ends. Be patient with everyone. Yes, this includes 72 00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:52,719 Speaker 1: patience with others in all their complexity and struggle, but 73 00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:56,680 Speaker 1: also patience with myself as I continue to grow, learn, 74 00:04:57,040 --> 00:05:01,080 Speaker 1: and sometimes miss the mark. Patience is the unhurried spirit 75 00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:05,160 Speaker 1: in which we approach all people, including ourselves. How might 76 00:05:05,240 --> 00:05:08,120 Speaker 1: this new way of thinking enter our actual practice. Well, 77 00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:13,880 Speaker 1: let's try these three ideas. First, slow your response before 78 00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:17,160 Speaker 1: you offer it when someone shares a struggle, pause internally 79 00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:20,840 Speaker 1: and ask yourself, what does this person truly need right now? 80 00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:26,280 Speaker 1: And then pause before you answer number two, Strengthen your 81 00:05:26,279 --> 00:05:30,880 Speaker 1: inner reserve practices of silence, prayer, and rest. Expand our 82 00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:35,080 Speaker 1: capacity to discern rather than react. If we're always hurried, 83 00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:37,680 Speaker 1: our stress levels may make it more difficult to actually 84 00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:40,600 Speaker 1: see where people are coming from and what they might need. 85 00:05:41,480 --> 00:05:45,960 Speaker 1: And then, third, practice patience as a spiritual discipline. See 86 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:48,680 Speaker 1: patience as an active trust in God's timing, both in 87 00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:52,040 Speaker 1: others and in yourself. I know this one is difficult, 88 00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:58,320 Speaker 1: but patience is a beautiful, unhurried virtue. Unhurried love sees clearly. 89 00:05:58,680 --> 00:06:04,240 Speaker 1: Unhurried leadership responds wisely, and unhurried patience create space for 90 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:07,440 Speaker 1: God to do the work only God can do. May 91 00:06:07,480 --> 00:06:10,200 Speaker 1: we become people who take the time to see others well, 92 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:13,000 Speaker 1: and who extend the same grace and patience to others 93 00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:16,840 Speaker 1: as we make our way. Blessings to you as you 94 00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:20,640 Speaker 1: do so. Thank you for joining me on the unhead 95 00:06:20,680 --> 00:06:23,880 Speaker 1: Living podcast. You can download free resources and learn more 96 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:27,240 Speaker 1: about us at Unhurried Living dot com, and please subscribe 97 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:30,360 Speaker 1: and share this podcast with your friends and colleagues. We'd 98 00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:32,920 Speaker 1: also like to thank our partner Life Audio. Check out 99 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:36,720 Speaker 1: their other faith centered podcasts at lifeaudio dot com. Blessings 100 00:06:36,760 --> 00:06:38,120 Speaker 1: to you as you make your way.