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Speaker 1: The Sharing Space on the Clement Manateela Show.

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Speaker 2: Twenty five minutes before twelve o'clock. The sharing space is

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Speaker 2: all about us sharing our stories and as our always

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Speaker 2: please send us your stories on CM at seven O

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Speaker 2: two dot zre that you want to share with us.

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Speaker 2: We share whatever happened at work, at home with your partner,

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Speaker 2: something that concerns you. Maybe if you need advice from

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Speaker 2: our listeners, just send an email to share your story

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Speaker 2: with us on seven o on CM at seven O

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Speaker 2: two dot z.

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Speaker 3: Today we've got.

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Speaker 2: An email from this anonymous anonymous and we I'm going

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Speaker 2: to read it. And if anonymus is asking for advice,

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Speaker 2: please be kind enough to advise them. And if they're

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Speaker 2: just sharing a story, I'd like to know if you've

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Speaker 2: been in the same situation before. So here we go, Hi, Clement,

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Speaker 2: there is something bothering me about how my friend is

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Speaker 2: parenting his children. My friend is Zulu originally from because

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Speaker 2: you do Natal, but resides in Kuting. He has three kids,

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Speaker 2: aged thirteen, ten, and eight. All three of his children

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Speaker 2: do not know how to speak their home language. The

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Speaker 2: eldest one understands some words, but cannot hold a full

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Speaker 2: conversation in isiZulu. The youngest one. The youngest ones cannot

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Speaker 2: speak the language at all. I have kids around the

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Speaker 2: same age, and I've made it a mission to teach

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Speaker 2: them my home language.

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Speaker 3: Is it claus.

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Speaker 2: I have raised concerns with my friend and his wife

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Speaker 2: about this for years, but they seem not to be

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Speaker 2: taking it seriously. I'm concerned that this is depriving the

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Speaker 2: kids not only of their beautiful language, but of their culture,

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Speaker 2: which is often tied to understanding language. What is suddening

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Speaker 2: me is that the kids are growing each year, and

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Speaker 2: it seems like they are straying feather and feather from

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Speaker 2: their language. I know it's none of my business, but

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Speaker 2: I care. I just don't know how I can make

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Speaker 2: my friend and his wife see the seriousness of this issue.

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Speaker 2: Is it any of my business? Please ask the seven

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Speaker 2: oh two lenders what advice they have for me on

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Speaker 2: how I can approach this situation. Anonymous. Okay, thank you

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Speaker 2: so much, Anonymous for sharing that story with us. I

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Speaker 2: will take your calls now on one one, eight, eight,

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Speaker 2: three oh seven oh two. What do you think of

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Speaker 2: what Anonymous is raising here as an issue? He's got

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Speaker 2: a friend who is from Guasalou Natal who is married

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Speaker 2: with three kids thirteen, ten, and eight, and Anonymous says,

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Speaker 2: my friend's children don't speak their home language. They don't

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Speaker 2: speak it is Zulu. They only speak English. An Anonymous

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Speaker 2: says he's concerned about that because that's part of their

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Speaker 2: children's culture and identity, and he's tried to raise it

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Speaker 2: with the friends, but they seem to be okay with it,

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Speaker 2: and he just wants to know how does he approach

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Speaker 2: it or should he stay away from it because it's

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Speaker 2: none of his business. And look, I have to say that.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I've come across couples who have decided to.

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Speaker 3: Raise their kids this way.

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Speaker 2: In fact, they take pride in the fact that their

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Speaker 2: children only understand English. It's quite scary. They take pride

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Speaker 2: in that, like that's a thing for them. It's like, oh,

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Speaker 2: our kid only speaks English. Yeah, so it's a thing

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Speaker 2: that really happens. But also we must be mature enough

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Speaker 2: to understand that that could be a choice of the parents.

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Speaker 2: Maybe to them, language is just language and it doesn't

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Speaker 2: mean as much as it means to you. So a

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Speaker 2: part of me also feels like just understand that those

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Speaker 2: people have their way of life and they've chosen that

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Speaker 2: way of life. Language to them is not as important.

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Speaker 2: But do you know of scenarios like that?

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Speaker 3: Huh?

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Speaker 2: We children cannot speak their mother tongue, whether that is

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Speaker 2: Afrikaans or Sibebi or English, and the parents are seem

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Speaker 2: to be okay with that. Or are you a type

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Speaker 2: of parent who says, as soon as you step into

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Speaker 2: this house, we speak this language and not English. You

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Speaker 2: can speak that in school or when we're talking about

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Speaker 2: your homework, but here we have to speak the your

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Speaker 2: your home language so.

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Speaker 3: That you get used to it.

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Speaker 2: Or are you a type of parent that says, the

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Speaker 2: kids need to practice this language when they're at home,

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Speaker 2: so you need to open that door. And how do

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Speaker 2: you deal with the kids when they go visit ukok

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Speaker 2: or nob I'm cool?

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Speaker 3: Huh? Who do you have? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: They must go there and say to a go go

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Speaker 2: go go, what's up? What's happening? Okay? Poor go gos?

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Speaker 2: What do you think of what Anonymous is raising this morning?

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Speaker 2: And what advice do you have for him? That's twenty

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Speaker 2: minutes for twelve olock, I'll go to your cousin what's ups?

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Speaker 3: After that?

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Speaker 1: I'm sharing space on The Clement Show seven.

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Speaker 2: All right, let's hear from you now, eighteen minutes before

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Speaker 2: twelve talk Mandla. Let's start with you. You are in Guanney.

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Speaker 2: Good morning, Hey, hey.

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Speaker 4: Good morning.

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Speaker 5: I wish that would reminder.

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Speaker 3: Go ahead, what do you think of it? With us?

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Speaker 5: So do the thing? You see, all the elite, those

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Speaker 5: of managed to take their children to the top tire

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Speaker 5: private schools. The moment when that starts, I think everyone

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Speaker 5: divets and start lay singly your children in English to

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Speaker 5: the next time that even when you visit them, then

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Speaker 5: you're trying to creet a young boy, a young girl, Hello, journey.

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Speaker 6: The even students say I'm like that, one can never

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Speaker 6: like like they take pride, you see, and then you

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Speaker 6: go like, I mean, how is this possible? All my

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Speaker 6: children can speak my home language and then they into

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Speaker 6: those schools. Then I don't understand. But then the only

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Speaker 6: person who should take a stand is the mother, because

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Speaker 6: a mother to child communications should be a own language

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Speaker 6: kind of like that. And time and again you'll be

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Speaker 6: picking a phone and say, your grandmother want to talk

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Speaker 6: to you, grandfather want to talk to you, And that's

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Speaker 6: where it starts, because obviously they can never be this,

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Speaker 6: you know, like what's out, Grammy, how you doing? No,

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Speaker 6: they will let that person.

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Speaker 4: Speak the language.

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Speaker 7: But in people, most of.

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Speaker 6: Them, I mean they say, you're the average of the

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Speaker 6: five people you spend most of your life with. But

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Speaker 6: those average, which I've got in my cycle, ninety percent

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Speaker 6: the children cannot speak their own last.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Amanda, that is quite crazy, man. I try it

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Speaker 2: the way I can talk to my friends about it.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I hear even with my niece. I try,

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Speaker 2: you know, to say, yeah, let's try a school because

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Speaker 2: the mum is cross. Oh, let's be paid because you're dead,

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Speaker 2: my brother paid because they need to learn that. All right,

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Speaker 2: Mandla in Gianna, thank you for for your call. Let's

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Speaker 2: go to Anna in Lane's field and a good morning.

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Speaker 8: Good morning claim it?

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Speaker 6: How are you?

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Speaker 3: I'm all right and go ahead? What are your thoughts?

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Speaker 8: According to me, we're living in modern days, guys, and

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Speaker 8: how people judge you, it doesn't matter. The mother's language

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Speaker 8: doesn't put food on the table. The every subject which

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Speaker 8: we learn we learn in English. If a persion understands English,

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Speaker 8: they will understand the question and how to answer the question.

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Speaker 8: That's how I see it. My child speaks English and

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Speaker 8: how people they judge me.

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Speaker 9: I don't care.

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Speaker 8: But the fact that if we are living in modern days,

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Speaker 8: even when you go and look for a job, we

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Speaker 8: don't go and speak your mother's language as is plagues

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Speaker 8: or whatever a culture. We can't over those jobs. So

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Speaker 8: for you to hear food on the tape, we must

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Speaker 8: be able to speak English. So for me, I'll go

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Speaker 8: for English and I will never judge anyone.

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Speaker 2: Thank you so much for this and thank you for

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Speaker 2: your contribution as well in Linksville.

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Speaker 3: Did you delay your Inventoria?

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Speaker 7: What do you think, Clement? I am African. Being an African,

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Speaker 7: my kids will speak the African language before any other

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Speaker 7: language for one simple reason. They have to be able

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Speaker 7: to speak into the family stractures without any struggle. M

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Speaker 7: If they can speak I'm swastly speaking. If they can

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Speaker 7: speak swasty or call it, it's good. Look basil kogo,

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Speaker 7: maganja no go or you know, and to me that

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Speaker 7: is very very important. English is is good. I mean,

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Speaker 7: as the previous scholars said, it puts when you go

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Speaker 7: to work, you speak English. That's good. We grew up

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Speaker 7: speaking our language.

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Speaker 3: We speak English.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, and it doesn't it doesn't change anything. If the

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Speaker 7: more languages you speak, the better, but not at the

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Speaker 7: expense of not speaking my mother tongue.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely, and I'm.

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Speaker 7: Very very strict about gurub'm and I'm played my sons

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Speaker 7: understand that mother angles and then you know, ab even

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Speaker 7: if they speak it is lurum, can't be accent. It's

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Speaker 7: fine in a Hea, but they have to be able

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Speaker 7: to speak their home language.

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Speaker 3: Czel in Pretoria. Thank you for your contribution.

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Speaker 10: Remend I think we need to leave people alone. People

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Speaker 10: will raise kids the way it suits them. If you

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Speaker 10: want your children to know it is Zulu, English, Africans

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Speaker 10: or the language, it is good for you, but it's

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Speaker 10: not the case for everyone else. So I think when

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Speaker 10: it comes to parenting, as long as the person is

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Speaker 10: not abusing their children, like yeah, don't involve yourself.

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Speaker 3: It's none of your business.

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Speaker 11: I claim you know. If there's one thing I've learned

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Speaker 11: is you do not interfere with how people are raising

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Speaker 11: their shouldren. It's their choice, it's their kids, it's theirs.

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Speaker 10: You stay out of it.

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Speaker 11: It's not your business. If the parent is open to advice,

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Speaker 11: they will ask you, but do not do not give

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Speaker 11: answers to the advice. It's really not necessary. And that's

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Speaker 11: if you treasure the friendship or value the friendship if I.

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Speaker 9: Can from it that way.

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Speaker 12: Yeah, good morning, Clement and seven or two all listeners. Yeah,

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Speaker 12: it's coming here from South Yeah, Clement, they've got some challenge.

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Speaker 12: You know, I don't know the local language. But like

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Speaker 12: my partner, she's a Twana, she's a Twana, and I

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Speaker 12: am from Uganda.

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Speaker 3: So we've got two kids.

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Speaker 12: We speak in English because I don't know her mother's language.

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Speaker 3: She doesn't know my language.

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Speaker 12: So we end up speaking English with our two children.

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Speaker 12: So yeah, it's honestly weird to understand, you know. I

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Speaker 12: also would like some advice from there.

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Speaker 3: Thank you for the good show anyway, thank you.

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Speaker 12: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And I can only imagine how complicated then that dynamic is.

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Speaker 3: And and maybe you need.

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Speaker 2: To learn a bit of Tuana and your wife needs

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Speaker 2: to learn a bit of your language from your Ganda,

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Speaker 2: and then teach the kids. My thing is, even if

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Speaker 2: I mean, if it's too complex, let them at least

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Speaker 2: know the basics. How do they greet, how do they respond,

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Speaker 2: how do they ask for water? How do they say

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Speaker 2: we're leaving goodbye? And you'd find the kids know how

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Speaker 2: to do those things in French, in German, in all

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Speaker 2: these other languages. But they are home languages. But then again,

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Speaker 2: let's also respect that some parents to them languages just language.

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Speaker 2: They don't care much as long as their kids are

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Speaker 2: communicating and are proficient in the language transactional language like English,

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Speaker 2: which is the medium of instruction. More of your cause

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Speaker 2: and what's ups after the break.

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Speaker 1: The sharing space on the Mantela Show.

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Speaker 3: Seven nine minutes before twelve o'clock.

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Speaker 2: If you've just joined us, we got a story on

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Speaker 2: our sharing space featured today from a gentleman who has

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Speaker 2: a friend and he's worried about how his friend is

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Speaker 2: raising his kids. He says the friend is married with

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Speaker 2: three kids thirteen, ten and eight, and none of them

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Speaker 2: are able to speak the language their home language, which

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Speaker 2: is is is Zulu. And this anonymous chap says the

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Speaker 2: friends and his wife are very okay with that, but

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Speaker 2: he feels like the kids, you know, this is taken

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Speaker 2: away from part of the identity, from their culture as well.

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Speaker 2: What do you think? And he's been asking how do

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Speaker 2: I approach this matter? And I'm asking you if you're

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Speaker 2: experiencing something similar, and what your thoughts are about what

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Speaker 2: Anonymous is raising with us? Mali, you're and Midrand, what

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Speaker 2: are your thoughts high?

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Speaker 3: So sure?

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Speaker 9: Yes, yes, Kevin, yes, especially does wonder bullet disclaimer. I

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Speaker 9: respect every parents' choice concerning the language they choose for

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Speaker 9: their child. However, for me, my screen would crawl if

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Speaker 9: my kids didn't speak my language. So yeah, the trick

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Speaker 9: that I used with all of my children right from

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Speaker 9: the stage where they begin to speak. Every school holiday,

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Speaker 9: I used to send them my mother at the village

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Speaker 9: so they can learn. I will drop them there, come

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Speaker 9: back after two weeks when the schools are opening, and

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Speaker 9: pick them up. And I did that consistently until the

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Speaker 9: age of six, and by then there was no escaping.

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Speaker 9: Now they know my language. They knew my language, and

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Speaker 9: they were fluent. So I would suggest to other parents

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Speaker 9: drop them off during school holidays and leave them. Yeah,

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Speaker 9: come back and pick them up when it's close to opening.

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Speaker 9: They will grasp the language.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, no, they definitely have. See that with my niece

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Speaker 2: when whenever she comes from spending time with my parents,

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Speaker 2: you can hear her letting out some sip video and

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Speaker 2: the belly words.

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Speaker 3: Thank you for your calllorato.

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Speaker 7: You.

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Speaker 2: Let's start with Nanna Fest. It was in Centurion, Yanna High.

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Speaker 13: Hi kermen, thank you so much for taking my call.

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Speaker 13: So I find myself in this predicament where my kids

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Speaker 13: speak predominantly English, so I'm a donna speaking lady and

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Speaker 13: my husband is songa. When we first met without the kids,

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Speaker 13: I took that extra step of learning the song Sonam.

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Speaker 13: But local people can hear that the excellent guest, so

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Speaker 13: that is fine. But now I'm having the trouble on

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Speaker 13: boarding my kids because we're on boarding Intusonga with a

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Speaker 13: mother that speaks they like thing in in Gian. My

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Speaker 13: song is bought from shop.

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Speaker 4: Right, which is a joke.

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Speaker 7: That is life.

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Speaker 13: I take it to heart because you can hear the

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Speaker 13: escents are so heavy. That's wine. But we've got a

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Speaker 13: few challenges and I feel always so jidge because my

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Speaker 13: kids predominantly speak English, parents don't understand, like for instance,

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Speaker 13: with my son when he started talking, he had speech impediments.

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Speaker 13: He's now in speech therapy, so that also added another layer.

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Speaker 13: My mother in law, unfortunately is late. I don't have

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Speaker 13: the option of shipping them to Giary.

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Speaker 4: Both my mother in law and my father in law.

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Speaker 13: My mom game and is also saying but no, I

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Speaker 13: gave my dog and so how do we do that?

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Speaker 13: But I want to also give props to my husband

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Speaker 13: on this call to say that every night they do

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Speaker 13: do words like no food and le they're made.

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Speaker 8: So it's a slow process.

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Speaker 13: I don't know when we will get there. But one

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Speaker 13: of the things I've been saying to the dong I

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Speaker 13: speaking community and all other communities like vendors, is you know,

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Speaker 13: here is an opportunity for someone to say on Saturday,

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Speaker 13: I have Donger classes in so way to people that

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Speaker 13: think like me can join them. I want actually paid

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Speaker 13: for that service. I know that when we get there

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Speaker 13: from the door, we're speaking Songer, even if it's bought

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Speaker 13: from shop rites. I have a community to converast because

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Speaker 13: my neighbors are Vulu and the Really I don't have

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Speaker 13: a Donger community other than me and my husband. So

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Speaker 13: maybe people listening as an opportunity. I am willing to

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Speaker 13: pay for those services. I will drive out to wherever

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Speaker 13: the people are. Obviously no one's in close Rangerman Centurance

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Speaker 13: and going far as the Whey to you tell me

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Speaker 13: you do these classes. I will pay because it is

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Speaker 13: worrying to me. I don't want to be here. But

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Speaker 13: as we can here, I've got challenges.

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Speaker 2: They do when you're and they're quite unique. But big

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Speaker 2: up to your husband. The fact that every night he

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Speaker 2: is intentional about that for me, that shows that you know,

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Speaker 2: he is trying to do something which is which is

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Speaker 2: good enough and and good on you for also learning.

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Speaker 3: What do you say? It's Inventoria high. How are you good?

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Speaker 4: Thanks? You know, it's I mean, the thing is that

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Speaker 4: we can't impose what a parent wants to do for

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Speaker 4: their child. But at the time, I think we always

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Speaker 4: have to remember that language is identity and it's something

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Speaker 4: that will never take a child backwards. And we we

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Speaker 4: are in a point where I think a lot of

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Speaker 4: our culture has become a bit diluted with urbanization and

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Speaker 4: all of that, and literally the sort of the strongholds

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Speaker 4: that we kind of go to as people that will

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Speaker 4: kind of preserve us encounter but longer, you know. And

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Speaker 4: I think the Malti lingo has never disadvantaged anyone, whether

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Speaker 4: it's the language that you speak locally or not. But

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Speaker 4: we also see more companies coming into South Africa that

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Speaker 4: are trying to get more immersed in local communities, being

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Speaker 4: able to speak a language that is of a certain

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Speaker 4: community will definitely benefit you. We can't always be looking

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Speaker 4: outwards and saying, this is what's happening abroad international or whatever,

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Speaker 4: what's happening locally, And these are things that in the

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Speaker 4: long run, in terms of just in terms of scope,

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Speaker 4: you can never be disadvantaged. And the unfortunate things that

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Speaker 4: I think most of us now, even in our households,

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Speaker 4: speak more English. Even as parents, we speak more English

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Speaker 4: than we do and unfortunately it does pass on to

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Speaker 4: the kids because we don't local language, and.

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Speaker 3: They when you speak to you with your friends, I sometimes.

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Speaker 4: Which has become more of a first language for all

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Speaker 4: of us. But I think I think we can also

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Speaker 4: see how how much of a disadvantage, how much it

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Speaker 4: is setting us back a child that we're able to

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Speaker 4: speak the language. Can can go can imss yourself in

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Speaker 4: any part of the community, even if you speak Zulu,

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Speaker 4: but go to Rastenberg. At least you can go there

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Speaker 4: and still be among people and communicate and they'll understand that, Okay,

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Speaker 4: you might not be from here, but you are one

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Speaker 4: of us.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Lonato in Victoria, thank you