WEBVTT - Prank 15 April

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<v Speaker 1>Stop what you're doing. Here is another world famous crank car.

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<v Speaker 2>From Darren Wackhead, something ex exclusive to KFM Mornings.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, so you check into a five star hotel, you

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<v Speaker 1>expect five star experience, right of course, of course, of course,

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<v Speaker 1>So this mom and dad at a five star hotel,

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<v Speaker 1>weak excursion. Right, I'm not going to say which hotel,

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<v Speaker 1>but the adult children informed me of all the details.

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<v Speaker 1>They came back and they weren't too happy. They weren't. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, the service wasn't five stars. So they had

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<v Speaker 1>a whole sort of laundry list of issues. So I thought,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, what, how do you make a disgruntled customer?

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<v Speaker 1>How do you sort the situ suation? Now, but you're

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<v Speaker 1>going to say more discrip, Well, yes, I'll make them

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<v Speaker 1>even more distrust I'll show you the five star service

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<v Speaker 1>that we're accustomed to. Okay. So they both the husband

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<v Speaker 1>and wife, we're on. I'm on like a speaker with them.

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<v Speaker 1>So they both end up having having a chat with me. So,

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<v Speaker 1>so they've been home for seven days already, I'm going,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, just wait for a week and and check

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<v Speaker 1>in with them. So here we go, let's escalate the situation. Hello,

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<v Speaker 1>good day, thir I'm looking for Meta Thwart. Please. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>calling you from the book hotel you in. Yeah, I

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<v Speaker 1>wanted to find out what time will you be checking out?

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<v Speaker 2>When will I be checking out? Yes, you must be joking,

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<v Speaker 2>my friend. I've checked out more.

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<v Speaker 1>Than a week ago. No, and I've paid my boat.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know how you system and say that I

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<v Speaker 2>haven't checked out.

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<v Speaker 1>So the last correspondent that we had from you was

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<v Speaker 1>seven days ago that you went to the death to

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<v Speaker 1>inquire about checking out. However, said there's been a do

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<v Speaker 1>not disturb sign on your door ever since, so we

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<v Speaker 1>haven't gone in.

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<v Speaker 2>Now, I don't know you. You've got a system with computers. Uh, yes,

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<v Speaker 2>and surely when somebody pays their ball and they and

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<v Speaker 2>somebody fetched their car and somebody loads their luggage, that

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<v Speaker 2>means they must be gone.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, So but the problem is we haven't rented the

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<v Speaker 1>room because the do not disturb sign. You waste my time.

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<v Speaker 2>Get the general managers for the ultiphone me because I've

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<v Speaker 2>got some photos and stuff that I also want to

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<v Speaker 2>send in about what the room look like, and then

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<v Speaker 2>we can solve the problems for once and all.

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<v Speaker 1>All Right, so the customer is king if you put

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<v Speaker 1>a do not disturb sign on, we won't bug you. Yes, gooday,

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<v Speaker 1>missus Swatt listen my friend it's David three yeah GM

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<v Speaker 1>from you know what, I.

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<v Speaker 2>Is absolutely bloody useless. I left that hotel today. I

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<v Speaker 2>get a phone call to say when am I checking out?

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, how ridiculous is that there was a do

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<v Speaker 1>not disturb sign on your door? The sign on?

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe you should start there. If you can't clean your rooms,

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<v Speaker 2>you don't lock your you leave the rubbish in your

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<v Speaker 2>environment for a week. If you want to let me

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<v Speaker 2>make some good I can actually come and show you

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<v Speaker 2>how to do your job, because you are not in

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<v Speaker 2>charge of what's going on at that hotel.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, Well, the problem is is that we can't clean

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<v Speaker 1>a room if there's a do not disturb sign on

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<v Speaker 1>it and you put it on. I didn't put it on.

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<v Speaker 2>Why would I put an non disturb sign on?

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<v Speaker 1>Well?

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<v Speaker 2>Why if you for a week? What did my reservation say?

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<v Speaker 1>When it's a five star service, so we really obey

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<v Speaker 1>that do not disturb sign?

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<v Speaker 2>Listen, if I make a reservation to check in on

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<v Speaker 2>one day and check in on another day and for

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<v Speaker 2>ten days. You guys, so you were happy for me

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<v Speaker 2>to stay in your hotel without a reservation.

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<v Speaker 1>Well you see a world class organization.

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<v Speaker 2>Well the thing is, and I will make a big issue.

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<v Speaker 1>Of the thing. Okay, hold on, eyes are useless.

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<v Speaker 2>I've checked out. I did not put the non disturb

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<v Speaker 2>sign on. Maybe your people put it on because they're

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<v Speaker 2>too lazy to clean, like we've had to phone every

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<v Speaker 2>single day to get our room clean. Well, maybe the

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<v Speaker 2>problem is on your side.

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<v Speaker 1>There's a ten day shortfall that we haven't been able

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<v Speaker 1>to rent the room out, which you are in fact

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<v Speaker 1>liable for. It's not so, yeah, you can get your lawyers.

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<v Speaker 2>My friend, because you make the assumption I put a

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<v Speaker 2>nonder steps sign on. I did not, So we handed

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<v Speaker 2>the key card in when we checked out. So where's

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<v Speaker 2>the problem. I'm actually Indian indignant. A hotel of your

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<v Speaker 2>steps leaves a room for ten days for text you

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<v Speaker 2>could have had a dead body and there.

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<v Speaker 1>Well we thought that you might just be having a

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<v Speaker 1>very long sleep for ten days.

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<v Speaker 2>I was checked out of that until by eleven o'clock day,

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<v Speaker 2>by ten o'clock the day actually nine o'clock I left

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<v Speaker 2>it off, was nine that morning.

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<v Speaker 1>You could have been having a very dirty weekend with

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<v Speaker 1>your wife, A dirty week you know, Well, don't come with.

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<v Speaker 2>A dirty weekend. Talk to me and let me tell

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<v Speaker 2>you the suggestion that my husband and I are having

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<v Speaker 2>a dreaming weekend.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean really, well, we never know and we wouldn't

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<v Speaker 1>want to walk in on that.

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<v Speaker 2>So I might have had a very dirty weekend. Is

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<v Speaker 2>that what you said? Did you just reported?

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<v Speaker 1>Is that what you suggested?

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<v Speaker 2>I had a very dirty weekend, And that's a possibility,

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<v Speaker 2>and that's why I was there. You are span pathetic,

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<v Speaker 2>out of control and implast that I had a dirty weekend,

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<v Speaker 2>speak Steen days and didn't come out of my room.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, what happens to the turndown service.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, imagine that turndown service clock walking in and there

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<v Speaker 1>is you and your husband doing the double backed monkey sword.

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<v Speaker 2>You know what, My husband and I don't do the

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<v Speaker 2>double back monkey sauce, and I don't appreciate your insinuations.

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<v Speaker 1>Well know what you do? Okay, I would just I've

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<v Speaker 1>actually got Shannon on the line with me now, Mom, I.

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<v Speaker 2>Just got it.

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<v Speaker 1>Frank you, Well, I'm going to kill you.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm going to kill you both.

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<v Speaker 1>Nicholas, Yes, yeah, so annoying. I don't know why they're

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<v Speaker 1>so embarrassed by having a dirty weekend. Mom is very push.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, you insinuated, call be professional indignant?

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<v Speaker 1>What is that move? They did the double back monkey sword.

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<v Speaker 1>But that call actually because I knew that their kids,

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<v Speaker 1>well they're adults, were listening. So it made me think

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<v Speaker 1>if hotel staff actually wanted say the things they really

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<v Speaker 1>wanted to say to us, can you imagine that would

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<v Speaker 1>probably be what it sounds like. Hey, can you imagine

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<v Speaker 1>because they see things the fall that they see the

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<v Speaker 1>stuff they see it. But you know what, thank you

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<v Speaker 1>for your professionals.

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<v Speaker 3>It reminds me of your story there, which one bred

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<v Speaker 3>I have many, the one where you were drinking chocolate

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<v Speaker 3>milk and you salted on the debate.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh yes, that was Look, that was accident. That was

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<v Speaker 1>week one in Cape Town. That was weak. But that

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<v Speaker 1>was that the color the color? Yeah, so so I

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<v Speaker 1>I my drink is chocolate milkshakes. If you know me,

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<v Speaker 1>every day I have I have a starry stumpy and

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<v Speaker 1>you know, I am so in the fridge there. I

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<v Speaker 1>bought a whole lot and I put it in the

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<v Speaker 1>hotel fridge and then and you know, you got to

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<v Speaker 1>shake it because you've got the chocolate at the bottoms.

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<v Speaker 1>Shook it and then I opened it, and you know

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<v Speaker 1>it always sprays, and it sprayed this brown chocolate milk

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<v Speaker 1>on the bed sheets. And those linens are white. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and then I thought she's gonna come in now pooped

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<v Speaker 1>the bed. So I didn't know what to do. I

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<v Speaker 1>was in panic. And then so you can't wash those sheets? No,

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<v Speaker 1>I can't, and and so so I took the stiry stumpy,

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<v Speaker 1>the opened one, and I put it on the section.

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<v Speaker 1>I took all the stery stumpies out the fridge and

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<v Speaker 1>I put it on the bed. So I'm hoping that

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<v Speaker 1>her mass added up in two and two. She went, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>this guy didn't do that in the bed. It's a

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<v Speaker 1>stery stump. Sorry.

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<v Speaker 3>Taking out the rest of the stairy stampy is a

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<v Speaker 3>bit extreme.

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<v Speaker 1>From all the stories, Dumpy. But on a final note,

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<v Speaker 1>can I just say something about hotels, come on man

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<v Speaker 1>eleven to check out. It's too early, I'm still dorsing

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<v Speaker 1>by then. It's holidays. But it makes sense though, no

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<v Speaker 1>it doesn't, because other people need to check in at

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<v Speaker 1>what's the time, three o'clock and someone he needs to clean.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm life, I'm not worried about the next customer. And

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<v Speaker 1>extend your breakfast. Men, you guys, get out of bed

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<v Speaker 1>and never make a hotel break never, always too early.

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<v Speaker 1>You put those track pants on, you put those slides

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<v Speaker 1>slides on, and you go to breakfast with hogs breath,

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<v Speaker 1>breakfast till twelve, check out at four. Stop it, stop it.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe it makes no sense to me. It does to

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<v Speaker 1>be like never check out, live here forever. Hotels. We

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<v Speaker 1>need to course correct, all right, you got it all wrong.

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<v Speaker 2>It's