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Speaker 1: You're listening to a mom with mere podcast.

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Speaker 2: Actually really like that T shirt? Where did you get that?

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Speaker 1: It's bad?

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Speaker 3: Batch is the name some lady startup and it's got

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Speaker 3: like a paddle pop and a bubblo bill. I was

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Speaker 3: explaining what all the things were about in the middle

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Speaker 3: of Lamington a fantale.

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Speaker 1: It's like all the best.

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Speaker 4: Is it true that fan tales have actually been pulled

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Speaker 4: from the market. I don't think you can buy them anymore,

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Speaker 4: which is really sad because dentists everywhere maybe they just

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Speaker 4: like lobbied to get them taken away.

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Speaker 1: Dentists hate fun.

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Speaker 3: They are delicious, but they are a pain in the ass,

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Speaker 3: like they do get stuck.

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Speaker 2: That's where are we gonna learn about obscure movie trivia?

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Speaker 4: Now?

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Speaker 1: What a shame? I know. I was learning so much

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Speaker 1: while I wrecked my teeth.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to Parenting out Loud, the podcasts for people who

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Speaker 2: don't always listen to parenting podcasts. We're not like the

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Speaker 2: other parenting podcasts. We bring you the news, the culture,

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Speaker 2: the trends, and what parents are secretly thinking about. I'm

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Speaker 2: Monic Bowley and I'm not wearing a bra.

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Speaker 1: Can you tell I'm Amelia Lester. I'm Stacy Hickson. No

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Speaker 1: you can't. Mons. They're looking very per.

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Speaker 2: Today if I do so, Tops, Lease, Tops, What are

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Speaker 2: we talking about today?

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Speaker 3: So stay at home moms are being replaced by a

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Speaker 3: group and it is stay at home sons. I am

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Speaker 3: being dead set serious. I will explain more.

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Speaker 1: Stay at home sons is my favorite new praise.

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Speaker 4: There's a new skincare line that is targeted not at teens,

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Speaker 4: not at tweens, but at little kids, like we're talking

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Speaker 4: three year olds in sheep masks. But we have a

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Speaker 4: theory about who this line is really targeting.

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Speaker 2: Oh my jaws tightening over that one. And everyone says

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Speaker 2: it takes a village, right. You would have heard that

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Speaker 2: before as a parent, but millennial parents beg to differ.

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Speaker 2: Are those four words the most useless advice in parenting

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Speaker 2: these days? It just might be. But first, Stacy, you

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Speaker 2: are our purveyor of the internet. What have you seen

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Speaker 2: this week that you're bringing to us?

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Speaker 3: So good old Prince William just spoke about how he

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Speaker 3: and Princess Catherine handled speaking to their kids in the

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Speaker 3: wake of her cancer diagnosis, and he was being interviewed

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Speaker 3: by Brazilian TV hosts Luciano huck and this is what

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Speaker 3: he said about their choice and how they handled it.

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Speaker 5: We choose to communicate a lot more with our children

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Speaker 5: now that has good things and it's bad things. Sometimes

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Speaker 5: you feel you're over sharing with the children you proba shouldn't.

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Speaker 5: But most of the time, hiding stuff in them doesn't work,

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Speaker 5: and so explaining that you know how they feel why

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Speaker 5: that's happening, give them other viewpoints as to why they

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Speaker 5: might be feeling how they are sometimes helps give them

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Speaker 5: a bigger picture and they can relax more into it

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Speaker 5: rather be really anxious about what are you hiding from you?

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Speaker 2: But what do I not know?

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Speaker 5: Why is that happening? There's a lot more questions when

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Speaker 5: there's no answers, but it's always a balancing out. To me,

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Speaker 5: every parent knows that it's kind of how much do

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Speaker 5: I say? What do I say? When do I say?

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Speaker 4: I just love this? And can I say that? Prince

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Speaker 4: William and Prince Harry, I know they're not talking and

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Speaker 4: that's really sad, and I know they've both been through

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Speaker 4: a lot. But one thing that comes through so clearly

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Speaker 4: for me with both those boys is that they care

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Speaker 4: so much about being good dads, and they talk to

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Speaker 4: us about it and they clearly agonize over it, and

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Speaker 4: they're trying to model like a collaborative relationship and dynamic

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Speaker 4: with their co parent with their wives. And I am

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Speaker 4: so here for these boys talking about being a dad

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Speaker 4: all the time.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's great, and like you can tell they've really

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Speaker 3: thought about it, like that is what the experts say.

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Speaker 3: You should be honest and transparent with your kids when

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Speaker 3: there's hard stuff like this going on, because it causes

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Speaker 3: so much more anxiety if they feel like things are

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Speaker 3: being kept from them.

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Speaker 1: Which is a bit counterintuitive.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah it is, But I loved that he was like,

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Speaker 3: they'll have more questions if you don't give them answers.

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Speaker 2: So do you think it's an intentional choice that William

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Speaker 2: is doing this? Is he trying to show a new

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Speaker 2: type of leadership. Is he trying to be a new

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Speaker 2: kind of dad? Because I hard agree with you, Amelia.

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Speaker 2: He's talked several times about hot button topics for parents.

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Speaker 2: He talks about sleep deprivation, he talks about screen time.

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Speaker 2: One time he talked about how Charlotte's hair was befuddling

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Speaker 2: to him and he had to look up YouTube on

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Speaker 2: how to do it, you know, a little bit hair.

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Speaker 2: It's very modern Dad.

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Speaker 4: He's in Brazil for the Climate Conference cop. In that

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Speaker 4: same interview, he talked about the fact that now that

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Speaker 4: Prince George is twelve, almost a teenager, which is really

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Speaker 4: scary to think about it. So they haven't given him

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Speaker 4: a smartphone yet. And apparently things are getting tense, is

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Speaker 4: what he said, because clearly George is doing that thing

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Speaker 4: kids do where they start lobbying for something.

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Speaker 1: He's probably made a PowerPoint.

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Speaker 4: About it, and he's lobbying, and he's lobbying, and I

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Speaker 4: love that even royals have to deal with like tense

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Speaker 4: situations with their kids where their kids want something and

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Speaker 4: you just have to keep holding that line.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, can't he just pull the king card out and

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Speaker 2: be like, listen, I'm going to.

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Speaker 1: Be the king.

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Speaker 2: You can't have a phone. End of story. Like I

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Speaker 2: rule here, it's the ultimate flex.

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Speaker 4: The issue is that I think George is also going

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Speaker 4: to be the king. So when you've got two pop

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Speaker 4: who are going to be the king? Who wins?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Maybe if it was Louis, he could be a little

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Speaker 1: bit stronger on that line. Louis follow Louis.

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Speaker 4: The Internet loves an outrage, and this week the Internet

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Speaker 4: delivered there is a new skincare line from the actor

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Speaker 4: Shane Mitchell that targets three year olds, four year olds,

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Speaker 4: five year olds. Now, before I get into the outrage,

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Speaker 4: and I know everyone here has a lot of feelings

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Speaker 4: about the skincare line, and why at marks the end

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Speaker 4: of Civilization, I want to spend just a minute on

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Speaker 4: Shane Mitchell herself, because what I learned in the office

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Speaker 4: this week is that this woman is something of a

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Speaker 4: gen z icon. Jen Z's around the office told me

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Speaker 4: that she is much better known to them for her

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Speaker 4: business interests than for her acting. She was most prominent

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Speaker 4: in the TV show Pretty Little Liars, and she also

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Speaker 4: appeared in that Netflix classic you remember that show, Very Ridiculous,

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Speaker 4: Very Fun.

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Speaker 2: Is she an influencer as well as an actor.

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Speaker 4: I think it would be more accurate to call her

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Speaker 4: an entrepreneur. So she has seen a lot of success

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Speaker 4: with a bag line called Bays. It's become so popular

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Speaker 4: that she even did a collaboration with Selena Gomez. And

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Speaker 4: the reason I'm spending time on this is because this

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Speaker 4: skincare line, which has provoked so much outrage, this is

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Speaker 4: a woman who knows how to read the room.

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Speaker 6: This is the Base Weekender bag created by Shane Mitchell.

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Speaker 1: There's a flap on the side that fits perfectly on

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Speaker 1: your suitcase. This tote has pockets and is big enough

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Speaker 1: to store everything that you'll need.

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Speaker 2: Wow, amazing a tote with pocket groundbreaking, ground break.

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Speaker 4: You're not Jen said, you don't understand why this was

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Speaker 4: revolutionary to them. She's become a bit of a sort

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Speaker 4: of older sister for them. Here is a podcast appearance

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Speaker 4: on Call Her Daddy where she's giving a tidbit of

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Speaker 4: advice about not getting paranoid about your partner.

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Speaker 7: We're gonna do what we're gonna do, regardless if you're

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Speaker 7: staying up at night, not sleeping, stocking and Instagram. He's

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Speaker 7: still gonna do what he's gonna do. He's not gonna

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Speaker 7: be like, well, Alex is probably up looking at the

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Speaker 7: clubs Instagram trying to like, you know, zoom into the

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Speaker 7: That's not gonna stop them, So, like, what is that

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Speaker 7: you just lose sleep?

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Speaker 4: Apparently Jen Zed found this advice really helpful to not

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Speaker 4: stalk your boyfriend on the internet. So, because she's so

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Speaker 4: good at reading the room, she has now decided that

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Speaker 4: a room full of young girls needs one thing, and

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Speaker 4: that one thing is sheep masks.

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Speaker 8: They are always wanting to do the things that mommy's doing.

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Speaker 8: And then you know, Atlas in one day was kind

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Speaker 8: of like, wait, where's mine? And I tried to find

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Speaker 8: her a sheep mask online? And the ingredients in these

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Speaker 8: masks are crazy. They're actually shouldn't be used for kids

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Speaker 8: at all. And then the same was true for all

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Speaker 8: of the makeup.

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Speaker 4: The lines called Reenie, what you can't hear is it

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Speaker 4: actually is very confronting to see a three year old

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Speaker 4: putting on a sheep mask. Mon's I know you are

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Speaker 4: losing it. Why does this make you so angry? She

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Speaker 4: just wants to put pure ingredients in sheep masks for

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Speaker 4: three year olds?

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Speaker 1: What is your problem?

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Speaker 2: I'm going to try really hard to part my outrage, okay,

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Speaker 2: because the internet has already been outraged on my behalf.

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Speaker 2: So the media and social media went bunter about this,

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Speaker 2: basically saying how depressing it is to push beauty standards

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Speaker 2: on children. Taking a deep breath. Self care was the

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Speaker 2: line that she used in launching this product. It's a

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Speaker 2: fun way to self care, like self care from what

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Speaker 2: our three year old's burnt out. I just and then

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Speaker 2: I went onto their website, onto the Reni website. According

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Speaker 2: to their website, their mission is simple, they say, to

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Speaker 2: nurture healthy habits and spark confidence. This is horseshit. You

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Speaker 2: know what a healthy habit is for a three year

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Speaker 2: old touching grass and playing with dirt and eating vegetable sticks.

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Speaker 2: And you know what sparks confidence in a three year

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Speaker 2: old practicing on the monkey bars, trying to nail a cartwheel,

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Speaker 2: like doing a puzzle. A face mask just is capitalism

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Speaker 2: gone mad. And it sends a message from a very

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Speaker 2: early age that your face matters and what you look

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Speaker 2: like matters, and that is dangerous.

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Speaker 4: This capitalism gone mad. But the reason I wanted to

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Speaker 4: stress how good she is at starting businesses is because

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Speaker 4: this is hitting a chord with people. It's not just

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Speaker 4: hitting an outrage cord. She clearly thinks that she can

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Speaker 4: sell these sheep masks.

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Speaker 3: I think your problem, what you're bothered by with a

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Speaker 3: mon's is the marketing of it. And I felt the

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Speaker 3: same when I saw this, and I saw it was

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Speaker 3: blatantly being marketed at three year olds, I was like,

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Speaker 3: oh my God, we have gone insane, like this has

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Speaker 3: to stop. But then the more I thought about it,

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Speaker 3: I was like, doesn't this just feel like play to them? Like,

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Speaker 3: how is this different to them dressing up? They see

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Speaker 3: us doing this at home? I know my daughter puts

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Speaker 3: on my eye shadow when I'm doing the same thing.

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Speaker 3: Is this not just a more appropriate product for them

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Speaker 3: that we're giving them?

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Speaker 4: I agree with you, yesday. Here's why I love sheep masks.

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Speaker 4: I'm on the record as saying I love sheep masks,

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Speaker 4: and when I put one on, my daughter also wants

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Speaker 4: to put one on. And then I did look at

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Speaker 4: the ingredients list and it was full of hectic skincare

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Speaker 4: ingredients that she doesn't need. If she can indulge in

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Speaker 4: this ritual with me with a skincare mask that doesn't

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Speaker 4: have a ton of actives and retinols in it, yeah,

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Speaker 4: I think that's harmless.

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Speaker 3: Because how is this different to the god three dollar

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Speaker 3: nail polishes that we used to put on?

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Speaker 2: Or like, okay, I will get to that point in

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Speaker 2: a minute. Your point about my daughter sees me doing

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Speaker 2: this and wants to do it too, My joory is

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Speaker 2: tightening these things. Amelia can be done with stuff from home.

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Speaker 2: You can slice up a cucumber and put them on

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Speaker 2: their eyes. You can get a warm face washer and

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Speaker 2: put it on her face.

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Speaker 3: Sorry, mons, there's no way if I'm there doing my

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Speaker 3: makeup or putting on a sheep mask, that my kid

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Speaker 3: is going to be happy with a face washer.

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Speaker 1: They don't want that.

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Speaker 3: They want to have the play that you are, and

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Speaker 3: that's what they see it as I don't. I don't

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Speaker 3: think they see it as deeply as we do, like

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Speaker 3: it is just a bit of a bit of fun.

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Speaker 3: They just want to be in on whatever we're doing.

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Speaker 2: It does not require a seven dollar hydrating hydrogel face

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Speaker 2: mask with vitamin B twelve. Which leads me to the

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Speaker 2: point about who this is actually right. And I think

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Speaker 2: the way that we feel about this, the uncomfortable feeling

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Speaker 2: we have, points to something deeper, which is childhood is

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Speaker 2: now this consumer identity in marketing parlance, there is this

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Speaker 2: really large segment of middle class parenting that is massively

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Speaker 2: about performance parenting through purchasing stuff. So the example I

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Speaker 2: would give is like when you get pregnant, lots of

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Speaker 2: women go down a PRAM rabbit hole because the PRAM

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Speaker 2: that you get the brand of Pram says something about

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Speaker 2: the kind of mother you are, and it's about the

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Speaker 2: right pram, A certain kind of car. Sad Beije clothing

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Speaker 2: is a big movement, and this is an extension of that.

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Speaker 2: This is marketed to those parents. And the other reason

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Speaker 2: I think that is because there are two other elements

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Speaker 2: of this marketing that I noted. One is the wellness angle,

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Speaker 2: which you pointed out, like, oh, it's all natural and

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Speaker 2: it's non toxic. But the other thing that I found

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Speaker 2: interesting was the Korean beauty angle. So when I went

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Speaker 2: onto the website, there's lots of messaging around elevated by

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Speaker 2: Korean innovation. Now that's interesting because kay beauty is very

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Speaker 2: hot right now. What it says is if you know

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Speaker 2: about it, you know, you know, you're cultured, you're smart,

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Speaker 2: you're plugged in. Like using k beauty is like cultural cachet, right.

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Speaker 2: It says you're cool. You're not your basic mum with

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Speaker 2: a pink plastic nail kit. You're a cool mum. And

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Speaker 2: that's the difference. Ah God, I just I feel like

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Speaker 2: this has really got under my skin. I've gone really

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Speaker 2: deep on this.

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Speaker 3: Who new sheep masks would be the things that would

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Speaker 3: set you off today.

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Speaker 4: Mo.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I follow this beauty writer called Jessica Defino. She has

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Speaker 2: this brilliant take on brands like Renie. She also talks

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Speaker 2: about it in terms of road Hailey Beabers brand, and

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Speaker 2: she says, these products are not made for the real world.

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Speaker 2: They are made for the mirror world. That is to say,

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Speaker 2: the world through your phone. So the point of these

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Speaker 2: products is to take a picture with it, and that's

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Speaker 2: why it's so successful. It markets itself. This is not

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Speaker 2: to make kids' skin better or to have a self

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Speaker 2: care moment with mum. This is a product created to

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Speaker 2: take a picture and share it. And why are we surprised?

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Speaker 2: We shouldn't be surprised. This woman is an actor, she's

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Speaker 2: an influencer. Her modus operandi as an entrepreneur is to

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Speaker 2: create products that cut through and create noise. And that's

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Speaker 2: exactly what she's done and we're all falling for it.

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Speaker 4: What I heard that you argued there was that these

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Speaker 4: sheep masks are being sold not to the three year old,

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Speaker 4: the four year old, the five year old, but to

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Speaker 4: the millennial mum who then wants to post it on

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Speaker 4: Instagram to prove something about how she parents.

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Speaker 2: Yes, correct, because little girls makeup kits and nail polish,

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Speaker 2: they're nothing new. They have always existed. They've been shit

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Speaker 2: and plastic, key and sparkly and gaudy and pink, and

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Speaker 2: they've been sold in toy shops and they've been sold

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Speaker 2: in big w and marketed as toys. The difference is

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Speaker 2: this is skincare marketed in an aesthetic to the mums.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and you're right, because they would just make them

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Speaker 3: white if it was purely for their skin, Like they've

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Speaker 3: got little animal prints on them. Like, you're right, it's

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Speaker 3: to take a photo, it's to have a mummy daughter

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Speaker 3: day spa.

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Speaker 4: But then how does that fit with I know that

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Speaker 4: you mentioned that there's a new skin CareLine for a

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Speaker 4: slightly older child.

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Speaker 3: I think that's why this is causing such outrage because

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Speaker 3: there's been a lot of talk in recent months about

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Speaker 3: the Sephora teen and that's kind of transformed into the

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Speaker 3: Sephora tween, Like it feels like it's getting younger and younger.

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Speaker 3: There's this fifteen year old YouTuber. Her name's Salish Matter.

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Speaker 3: She's got millions of followers on YouTube, like through her

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Speaker 3: dad's account, it's all very strange. But she launched her

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Speaker 3: own skincare brand into Sephora in the US and eighty

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Speaker 3: thousand people turned up to the launch. Like, if you

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Speaker 3: think about that amount of people, that's a Taylor Swift

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Speaker 3: concert in Sydney, Like that amount of people with their

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Speaker 3: parents with children as young as eight on their shoulders.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna ask what is her target?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, her target audience is tweens, so as young as

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Speaker 3: eg she's looking at like eight to fifteen with her brand,

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Speaker 3: and there's products like so Soft Daily barrier strengthening, lightweight moisturizer,

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Speaker 3: which is more words than any product should have in

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Speaker 3: a career.

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Speaker 1: Children have perfect barriers exactly.

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Speaker 3: Brier barrier is barely formed, Like they don't need to

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Speaker 3: be looking after their barrier five and then.

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Speaker 1: We'll talk about barriers being rightly exactly.

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Speaker 3: But you're right, it is that now girlhood is being

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Speaker 3: commodified earlier and earlier, and that's what it's feeling like,

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Speaker 3: that we're dragging down that age and selling things to them.

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Speaker 3: Justine Cullen was on Mama MIA's new Beauty podcast a

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Speaker 3: few weeks ago and she was talking about this as well,

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Speaker 3: that the most worrying part is that we're putting them

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Speaker 3: on a purchasing path so early.

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Speaker 6: Obviously, you know, we want our kids' skin barriers to

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Speaker 6: be healthy and all of those kinds of things. But

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Speaker 6: I think the pearl clutching needs to be about, you know,

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Speaker 6: how are we setting our children up on a path

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Speaker 6: of capitalism, on a purchasing path from such a young age.

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Speaker 6: We are essentially sort of soft onboarding them into a

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Speaker 6: world where they can just be marketed to constantly. You know,

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Speaker 6: that is a worry. It's like girlhood used to be.

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Speaker 6: As you just mentioned girlhood, it was a phase of life.

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Speaker 6: It was, you know, probably the most important phase in

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Speaker 6: setting up who you were going to be. And now

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Speaker 6: girlhood is just a marketing demographic. And I think that

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Speaker 6: that's pretty scary.

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Speaker 1: That makes me feel so sad.

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Speaker 3: I think we need to look at it as we're

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Speaker 3: the ones in control of purchasing those products, and if

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Speaker 3: you're purchasing those with the idea of it being for

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Speaker 3: a bit of fun and a bit of whimsy and

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Speaker 3: that connection time with them, is this not just a

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Speaker 3: new version of a little treat like we're told now,

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Speaker 3: don't treat them with lollies, don't treat them with ice

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Speaker 3: blocks for everything they do, Like, this can be the

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Speaker 3: way you bond with them, unless we're planning on giving

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Speaker 3: up using all beauty products ourselves, Like they are going

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Speaker 3: to get to the age where they put fake ten

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Speaker 3: on earth rushes?

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Speaker 2: Does it feel wrong because childhood is not meant to

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Speaker 2: look like that? Like, are we railing against the adultification

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Speaker 2: of three year olds? Like there are lots of comments

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Speaker 2: online saying just let them be kids, Let kids be kids.

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Speaker 2: Why are we indoctrinating them into adult rituals this early?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, you're right.

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Speaker 3: And it's the same thing you think when you see,

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Speaker 3: you know, kids for a dance concert and they've got

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Speaker 3: a full face of makeup on, Like that's part of

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Speaker 3: the performance, but it is jarring and you go ooh,

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Speaker 3: I don't know if I want them to be even

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Speaker 3: having to think about this that early. So I think

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Speaker 3: that is the tension absolutely. Okay, So I've got a

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Speaker 3: new term for you. You've always got the terms for us.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this is the new six seven, except not as annoying.

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Speaker 1: It's great.

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Speaker 2: Did bring us six seven.

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Speaker 1: Seven before I heard it in the wild?

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Speaker 3: Okay, hub Sons, what tell us like husbands, but hub sons. Okay,

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Speaker 3: there's this story in Vanity Fair this week about how

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Speaker 3: there is a new breed of trad wives. So trad wives,

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Speaker 3: you know, the traditional women who are like homesteading and

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Speaker 3: doing all the traditional gender role things. There's now stay

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Speaker 3: at home sons.

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Speaker 1: I get such a kick out of this.

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Speaker 3: So there is this new breed of men online who

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Speaker 3: are boasting about the fact that they are stay at

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Speaker 3: home home sons. I'm so fascinated by this. So a

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Speaker 3: few of them that they spoke to in this Vanity

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Speaker 3: Fair piece, it's so brilliant.

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Speaker 1: Well link to it in the show notes.

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Speaker 3: A few of them, you know, were thereby happenstance, like

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Speaker 3: they lost their jobs or you know, they broke up

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Speaker 3: with their girlfriend and had to move home. That's not

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Speaker 3: what we're talking about. They spoke to one in particular,

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Speaker 3: Luke Parkhurst, who quit his job he had a six

397
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Speaker 3: figure job as a daughter or salesman, sold his house

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Speaker 3: and moved in with his mum for I quote because I.

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Speaker 1: Wanted to I love this. Isn't this great? So he says,

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Speaker 1: his days consistent.

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Speaker 3: He goes and works out in the morning, goes to

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Speaker 3: the gym, goes and gets groceries for the family, cooks

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Speaker 3: them lunch, cooks them a nice wholesome lunch, spends the

404
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Speaker 3: afternoon doing chores and cleaning the pool, while his mum, Patty,

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Speaker 3: just has a grand old time.

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Speaker 2: Wait, who's working in the house.

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Speaker 3: Well, I think she goes out and works, but then

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Speaker 3: comes home or works from home with this home cooked meal,

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Speaker 3: comes home to all the chores done in the afternoon.

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Speaker 3: I kind of think she's onto something. I think Patty's

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Speaker 3: a bit of a genius.

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Speaker 4: I'm so excited for the Sun Wars. You know how

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Speaker 4: we had the Mummy Wars. You just say it at

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Speaker 4: home mums and the mums who worked outside the home.

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Speaker 1: I want to have the Sun War. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I kind of love that they're so secure in their masculinity,

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Speaker 3: Like they're not bothered that they're being called mummies boys at.

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Speaker 1: All, which is normally such a stigma.

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Speaker 4: It dates back to, you know, Psycho, the idea of

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Speaker 4: if you're too close to.

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Speaker 1: Your mum, there's something wrong with you. But they're not

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Speaker 1: buying into that.

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Speaker 3: No, they're kind of going, well, you're saying for women

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Speaker 3: to stay at home, that work should be valued and

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Speaker 3: it should, so.

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Speaker 1: I'm just going to do that instead. Someone's got to

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Speaker 1: do it.

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Speaker 2: What are people saying about what do you call them? Hubsuns?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Like are people happy about this? Are people disgusted by this?

431
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Speaker 2: What's the temperature?

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Speaker 3: I think people are really confused and going, is this

433
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Speaker 3: just like the twenty twenty five version of a slacker?

434
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Speaker 3: Like you're just reading branding yourself as if you're mooching

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Speaker 3: off mummy. But they're trying to say, no, that's that's

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Speaker 3: not what it is, Like someone.

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Speaker 1: Needs to be here doing all things role.

438
00:20:04,314 --> 00:20:06,794
Speaker 4: It's buying into a patriarchal idea that work in the

439
00:20:06,874 --> 00:20:10,354
Speaker 4: home is not valuable and it's not inherently valuable.

440
00:20:10,394 --> 00:20:12,354
Speaker 1: They're saying someone's going to do this work.

441
00:20:13,034 --> 00:20:15,874
Speaker 3: You know who is pissed off at them? The trad wives.

442
00:20:16,194 --> 00:20:19,114
Speaker 3: They're not happy. They're saying, we don't want that type

443
00:20:19,114 --> 00:20:21,234
Speaker 3: of man we want to provide up. We want a

444
00:20:21,274 --> 00:20:23,273
Speaker 3: man who's going to go out and be doing a

445
00:20:23,314 --> 00:20:25,154
Speaker 3: lot of those things so we can have that role.

446
00:20:25,274 --> 00:20:27,273
Speaker 3: So they are on opposite sides of the fence.

447
00:20:27,514 --> 00:20:29,794
Speaker 2: That's interesting you say that, because that's where my mind went.

448
00:20:29,954 --> 00:20:33,434
Speaker 2: My mind went to their Tinder profile, like how are

449
00:20:33,434 --> 00:20:36,194
Speaker 2: they gonna Are they going to tell people what they do?

450
00:20:36,514 --> 00:20:38,434
Speaker 2: Like if some if you're dating someone and you're like,

451
00:20:38,434 --> 00:20:39,994
Speaker 2: what do you do for work? And they said, Oh,

452
00:20:40,034 --> 00:20:41,513
Speaker 2: I just break up the leaves.

453
00:20:41,594 --> 00:20:44,033
Speaker 1: I'm a stay at armage. Yeah, yeah, I don't know.

454
00:20:44,554 --> 00:20:47,874
Speaker 2: That might feel kind of unattractive. It's a bit of

455
00:20:47,914 --> 00:20:50,793
Speaker 2: a double standard, isn't it. Like when women do it

456
00:20:50,914 --> 00:20:54,594
Speaker 2: this tradwive movement, like it's aspirational that when men do it,

457
00:20:54,594 --> 00:20:57,874
Speaker 2: it's like, gives me the icker bit, but I want

458
00:20:57,914 --> 00:21:00,594
Speaker 2: to love it. But also I'm like, oh, those patriarchal

459
00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:03,274
Speaker 2: norms they run so deep, and really, yeah they do,

460
00:21:03,594 --> 00:21:06,154
Speaker 2: they do. Thank you for bringing us that little gem.

461
00:21:06,434 --> 00:21:10,273
Speaker 2: I want to talk about the most problematic thing that

462
00:21:10,434 --> 00:21:13,914
Speaker 2: parents get told constantly. When I had two under two,

463
00:21:14,074 --> 00:21:17,434
Speaker 2: there was a phrase that I heard a lot. Well

464
00:21:17,474 --> 00:21:20,594
Speaker 2: meaning people would look at my harried face and my

465
00:21:20,674 --> 00:21:23,954
Speaker 2: bird's nest hair and my two year old having a

466
00:21:24,034 --> 00:21:27,394
Speaker 2: meltdown and my baby screaming, and they would say takes

467
00:21:27,394 --> 00:21:30,554
Speaker 2: a village, and I would smile and I would nod,

468
00:21:30,674 --> 00:21:33,994
Speaker 2: and I thought, where is my village? Like where is

469
00:21:34,194 --> 00:21:37,154
Speaker 2: where is this mystical village? Who is going to hold

470
00:21:37,234 --> 00:21:39,354
Speaker 2: this baby, Who's going to make me a lasagna? Who's

471
00:21:39,394 --> 00:21:42,154
Speaker 2: going to let me sleep? Who's going to fold all

472
00:21:42,154 --> 00:21:45,114
Speaker 2: this washing? There was an article this week in the

473
00:21:45,154 --> 00:21:50,194
Speaker 2: Atlantic by Olga Kazan which put into words this exact feeling,

474
00:21:50,314 --> 00:21:55,074
Speaker 2: and the headline was the most useless piece of parenting advice,

475
00:21:55,154 --> 00:21:58,354
Speaker 2: And she basically says that this phrase it takes a village,

476
00:21:58,954 --> 00:22:01,154
Speaker 2: has got to be one of the most useless cliches

477
00:22:01,234 --> 00:22:04,754
Speaker 2: in modern parenting because even though it sounds wholesome, it's

478
00:22:04,874 --> 00:22:10,154
Speaker 2: completely unrealistic for today parents, especially mums. She just says,

479
00:22:10,514 --> 00:22:15,554
Speaker 2: the social infrastructure has changed, guys, there is no village.

480
00:22:15,594 --> 00:22:18,354
Speaker 2: You need to buy your village now. The village is

481
00:22:18,394 --> 00:22:22,434
Speaker 2: now a transaction that you are the manager of. So Stacy,

482
00:22:22,474 --> 00:22:23,634
Speaker 2: am I the only one feeling this?

483
00:22:23,914 --> 00:22:25,154
Speaker 1: No, definitely not.

484
00:22:25,434 --> 00:22:28,513
Speaker 3: And I think even if you have family nearby or

485
00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:30,754
Speaker 3: friends who say to you, you know, if you need anything,

486
00:22:30,954 --> 00:22:31,553
Speaker 3: just let me know.

487
00:22:32,074 --> 00:22:34,394
Speaker 1: The reality is they're just as busy as you like.

488
00:22:34,834 --> 00:22:37,274
Speaker 3: They're both working, They've got the same amount of kids,

489
00:22:37,314 --> 00:22:39,914
Speaker 3: if not more kids than you. It ends up just

490
00:22:39,954 --> 00:22:44,034
Speaker 3: being like the village takes time, it takes comparing of calendars,

491
00:22:44,114 --> 00:22:46,914
Speaker 3: it takes mental load, it's just too difficult that you

492
00:22:46,994 --> 00:22:48,674
Speaker 3: just go, I just don't have time for this. We

493
00:22:48,754 --> 00:22:50,354
Speaker 3: just have to be our own village.

494
00:22:50,514 --> 00:22:53,474
Speaker 2: It's not necessarily an individual's problem, right There's been a

495
00:22:53,794 --> 00:22:57,754
Speaker 2: larger societal shift with cost of living. Like back in

496
00:22:57,794 --> 00:23:00,634
Speaker 2: the day of the village, there were more stay at

497
00:23:00,674 --> 00:23:04,194
Speaker 2: home mums. People owned houses, so there were neighbors that

498
00:23:04,514 --> 00:23:06,554
Speaker 2: put down roots and knew each other. There might have

499
00:23:06,594 --> 00:23:09,794
Speaker 2: been grand parent's close by. But now everyone is spread out,

500
00:23:09,914 --> 00:23:14,114
Speaker 2: everyone is working, everyone is time poor. So yeah, I

501
00:23:14,154 --> 00:23:15,954
Speaker 2: do think the traditional village is dead.

502
00:23:16,274 --> 00:23:17,074
Speaker 1: I knew that you.

503
00:23:17,034 --> 00:23:19,114
Speaker 4: Were both going to bring up the cost of living

504
00:23:19,154 --> 00:23:20,994
Speaker 4: and the housing and all of this is true, the

505
00:23:21,074 --> 00:23:24,273
Speaker 4: time poor. But I have a more confronting question to

506
00:23:24,314 --> 00:23:27,194
Speaker 4: ask you, and that is do you even want a village?

507
00:23:28,034 --> 00:23:30,514
Speaker 4: And I think this is something that we're all grappling

508
00:23:30,554 --> 00:23:32,513
Speaker 4: with because you know what it takes to be in

509
00:23:32,554 --> 00:23:35,234
Speaker 4: a village. Everyone wants a village, but no one wants

510
00:23:35,314 --> 00:23:37,994
Speaker 4: to be a villager. That's a phrase that I'm told

511
00:23:38,074 --> 00:23:40,234
Speaker 4: is all over the internet right now, even for people

512
00:23:40,314 --> 00:23:43,914
Speaker 4: who don't have children. This question of am I prepared

513
00:23:43,914 --> 00:23:47,073
Speaker 4: to inconvenience myself to be part of a village is

514
00:23:47,114 --> 00:23:49,514
Speaker 4: real and the answer for most people these days, who

515
00:23:49,514 --> 00:23:51,994
Speaker 4: are used to Uber eats and getting everything on demand,

516
00:23:52,074 --> 00:23:53,273
Speaker 4: the answer is probably no.

517
00:23:53,474 --> 00:23:55,354
Speaker 1: I don't want to be a villager. Yeah.

518
00:23:55,394 --> 00:23:57,354
Speaker 3: I saw this great Instagram post the other day and

519
00:23:57,394 --> 00:23:59,634
Speaker 3: it was saying annoyance is the price you have to

520
00:23:59,674 --> 00:24:02,674
Speaker 3: pay for community, and none of us want to be annoyed, no,

521
00:24:02,954 --> 00:24:05,794
Speaker 3: Like it is having to have a really long conversation

522
00:24:05,914 --> 00:24:09,273
Speaker 3: with the neighbor about they're you know, boring fence or

523
00:24:09,314 --> 00:24:12,194
Speaker 3: something after they've looked after your kid. Like, you have

524
00:24:12,314 --> 00:24:14,474
Speaker 3: to deal with annoying people if you want them to

525
00:24:14,514 --> 00:24:15,914
Speaker 3: be there doing favors for here.

526
00:24:15,954 --> 00:24:18,593
Speaker 4: And this is true, by the way, again, not just

527
00:24:18,594 --> 00:24:21,674
Speaker 4: for people with kids, but everyone these days. Em Vernon

528
00:24:21,794 --> 00:24:25,154
Speaker 4: MoMA mia Is m Vernon wrote a fantastic piece on

529
00:24:25,314 --> 00:24:28,274
Speaker 4: site this week about this concept. She wrote, we mourn

530
00:24:28,354 --> 00:24:31,033
Speaker 4: the loss of community, yet we forget that a village

531
00:24:31,114 --> 00:24:34,474
Speaker 4: requires participation. She talked about how she wanted to go

532
00:24:34,594 --> 00:24:36,394
Speaker 4: up with her friend. They've made a plan. She was

533
00:24:36,434 --> 00:24:39,074
Speaker 4: excitedly putting on her eyeliner, and just as she was

534
00:24:39,074 --> 00:24:41,114
Speaker 4: putting her makeup on, she gets a ping on her phone.

535
00:24:41,154 --> 00:24:42,874
Speaker 4: Her friend had counseled. She said, I don't feel it

536
00:24:42,914 --> 00:24:45,634
Speaker 4: going out tonight, and em wrote about how she wasn't

537
00:24:45,634 --> 00:24:49,474
Speaker 4: even surprised because flaking on plans, canceling on people, this

538
00:24:49,634 --> 00:24:52,194
Speaker 4: is just the new normal. We've forgotten what it means

539
00:24:52,234 --> 00:24:53,034
Speaker 4: to be a villager.

540
00:24:53,394 --> 00:24:56,273
Speaker 3: Yeah, there was an article in Slate this week that

541
00:24:56,314 --> 00:24:58,874
Speaker 3: talked about that as well, Like it was called I'm

542
00:24:58,874 --> 00:25:01,594
Speaker 3: starting to think you don't want a village, and they

543
00:25:01,594 --> 00:25:04,354
Speaker 3: were saying the same thing, like the community is not

544
00:25:04,434 --> 00:25:06,634
Speaker 3: really a priority for us anymore, and it's kind of

545
00:25:06,674 --> 00:25:10,354
Speaker 3: a bibe product of us being such involved parents now,

546
00:25:10,674 --> 00:25:13,594
Speaker 3: So the standard for who we would trust to look

547
00:25:13,594 --> 00:25:16,194
Speaker 3: after our kids, or the standard for caregivers for our

548
00:25:16,274 --> 00:25:18,474
Speaker 3: kids is so high that we go, well, no, I'm

549
00:25:18,474 --> 00:25:20,554
Speaker 3: not going to let a fourteen year old babysit my kid,

550
00:25:20,794 --> 00:25:22,474
Speaker 3: Like I'm not gonna let the neighbor down the road

551
00:25:22,554 --> 00:25:24,434
Speaker 3: have my kid without a full police check.

552
00:25:24,554 --> 00:25:25,794
Speaker 1: That piece was really raw.

553
00:25:25,914 --> 00:25:28,914
Speaker 4: The author talked about how they were constantly reaching out

554
00:25:28,954 --> 00:25:31,034
Speaker 4: to people in their life and saying, let's get together

555
00:25:31,074 --> 00:25:32,793
Speaker 4: with the kids, let's go to the playground, let's had

556
00:25:32,794 --> 00:25:35,914
Speaker 4: dinner together, and was constantly getting rebuffed because we're out

557
00:25:35,914 --> 00:25:39,314
Speaker 4: of town this weekend. We have sports practice today, everyone's

558
00:25:39,354 --> 00:25:43,074
Speaker 4: lives have become so busy and so scheduled that finally

559
00:25:43,114 --> 00:25:45,954
Speaker 4: this person thought, well, no one really wants a village

560
00:25:45,994 --> 00:25:48,074
Speaker 4: with me. That's why I can't have a village. Forget

561
00:25:48,114 --> 00:25:50,434
Speaker 4: cost of living. No one wants it anymore.

562
00:25:50,754 --> 00:25:54,313
Speaker 2: Oh that's so sad, guys, that is really sad. What

563
00:25:54,354 --> 00:25:56,714
Speaker 2: all the researchers are saying. They're all wringing their hands

564
00:25:56,754 --> 00:25:59,314
Speaker 2: over this because we have a loneliness epidemic and it's

565
00:25:59,314 --> 00:26:02,714
Speaker 2: only going to increase with this kind of the way

566
00:26:02,714 --> 00:26:05,834
Speaker 2: that we're living. Like, there's no answer here. But I

567
00:26:05,874 --> 00:26:09,794
Speaker 2: do think I think what's interesting is that you said before, Amelia,

568
00:26:09,994 --> 00:26:12,754
Speaker 2: we're not sure if we want it, And to be honest,

569
00:26:12,874 --> 00:26:15,434
Speaker 2: I relate to that because I do find that when

570
00:26:15,474 --> 00:26:18,394
Speaker 2: I pay someone to look after my kids, it's very

571
00:26:18,434 --> 00:26:20,954
Speaker 2: clean cut and that kind of everyone knows where they stand.

572
00:26:21,554 --> 00:26:23,674
Speaker 2: I like the transactional nature of it.

573
00:26:24,074 --> 00:26:27,474
Speaker 4: That's so true, Mon's and I think that money takes

574
00:26:27,554 --> 00:26:31,074
Speaker 4: emotion out of things. And part of what's awkward about

575
00:26:31,114 --> 00:26:33,834
Speaker 4: getting people to say, mind your kids who are not

576
00:26:33,994 --> 00:26:36,874
Speaker 4: being paid is they may not do things the way

577
00:26:36,914 --> 00:26:38,074
Speaker 4: you want them to do things.

578
00:26:38,434 --> 00:26:41,194
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then it creates a really awkward.

579
00:26:40,954 --> 00:26:43,394
Speaker 4: Dynamic because they feel like they're doing you a favor,

580
00:26:43,434 --> 00:26:43,994
Speaker 4: which they are.

581
00:26:44,594 --> 00:26:46,114
Speaker 1: You don't want them giving them.

582
00:26:46,314 --> 00:26:49,754
Speaker 4: You know, a whole bunch of Halloween lolly is leftover

583
00:26:50,234 --> 00:26:53,074
Speaker 4: just half an hour before dinner. But how can you

584
00:26:53,154 --> 00:26:55,114
Speaker 4: say that to them when they're doing you a favor.

585
00:26:55,274 --> 00:26:57,674
Speaker 4: That's the problem with the village. We've gotten so used

586
00:26:57,674 --> 00:27:00,234
Speaker 4: to saying this is exactly how I want a parent,

587
00:27:00,314 --> 00:27:03,313
Speaker 4: particularly millennial parents who are used to getting their own

588
00:27:03,354 --> 00:27:05,714
Speaker 4: way on these things. All of a sudden, letting someone

589
00:27:05,794 --> 00:27:08,394
Speaker 4: in and losing control is really uncomfortable.

590
00:27:08,474 --> 00:27:11,954
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's also the emotional load of a village. It's

591
00:27:11,994 --> 00:27:14,434
Speaker 2: the give and take. You take someone else's kid than

592
00:27:14,474 --> 00:27:17,674
Speaker 2: they owe you, and that's kind of another load that

593
00:27:17,834 --> 00:27:21,513
Speaker 2: when you don't have anything left to give that like,

594
00:27:21,594 --> 00:27:23,634
Speaker 2: no one's got the energy for that as well.

595
00:27:23,714 --> 00:27:24,674
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's such a good point.

596
00:27:24,714 --> 00:27:27,394
Speaker 4: My parents told me that when they were starting out

597
00:27:27,434 --> 00:27:31,314
Speaker 4: with their first kid in the seventies, their neighborhood had

598
00:27:31,474 --> 00:27:34,234
Speaker 4: a list, like a paper list, of everyone in the

599
00:27:34,274 --> 00:27:37,154
Speaker 4: neighborhood who wanted to be in a babysitting collective, and

600
00:27:37,194 --> 00:27:39,714
Speaker 4: so you would just sort of do a babysitting swap

601
00:27:40,114 --> 00:27:43,074
Speaker 4: with another set of parents. Now I cannot imagine that

602
00:27:43,154 --> 00:27:46,073
Speaker 4: happening today because the level of trust between people who

603
00:27:46,114 --> 00:27:47,634
Speaker 4: don't know each other is just not there.

604
00:27:47,994 --> 00:27:48,234
Speaker 1: Yeah.

605
00:27:48,314 --> 00:27:51,874
Speaker 2: Yeah, so my parents run a system of curtain rings.

606
00:27:52,234 --> 00:27:54,914
Speaker 2: I don't know how this makes sense, but they had

607
00:27:54,914 --> 00:27:57,154
Speaker 2: a big pile of curtain rings in Each family would

608
00:27:57,234 --> 00:27:59,754
Speaker 2: take ten curtain rings, and every time you wanted someone

609
00:27:59,754 --> 00:28:01,794
Speaker 2: to look after your kids, you would swap the curtain rings.

610
00:28:01,834 --> 00:28:03,914
Speaker 2: I'm like, are you all right? Were you just all

611
00:28:03,954 --> 00:28:04,914
Speaker 2: smoking on something?

612
00:28:05,074 --> 00:28:05,154
Speaker 5: Like?

613
00:28:05,194 --> 00:28:05,954
Speaker 4: What? Now?

614
00:28:06,034 --> 00:28:09,514
Speaker 3: We expect community to be completely frictionless, Like we don't

615
00:28:09,514 --> 00:28:12,234
Speaker 3: want there to be any tension, any awkwardness.

616
00:28:11,874 --> 00:28:13,714
Speaker 1: But maybe we need to deal with a little bit

617
00:28:13,754 --> 00:28:13,994
Speaker 1: of that.

618
00:28:14,034 --> 00:28:16,434
Speaker 4: Look any parenting out lauders out there who want to

619
00:28:16,434 --> 00:28:18,794
Speaker 4: get involved, be a villager, go on by your curtainry.

620
00:28:18,914 --> 00:28:19,234
Speaker 1: Yes.

621
00:28:20,834 --> 00:28:22,874
Speaker 2: I also want to just mention like the burden of

622
00:28:22,874 --> 00:28:26,834
Speaker 2: building the village, because this feels like it falls disproportionately

623
00:28:26,914 --> 00:28:29,273
Speaker 2: on women, Like we don't tell dads to go and

624
00:28:29,314 --> 00:28:32,074
Speaker 2: find their tribe. It's always the mums that are trying

625
00:28:32,074 --> 00:28:34,994
Speaker 2: to create the village. So on top of being exhausted,

626
00:28:35,514 --> 00:28:37,874
Speaker 2: you're also meant to be running your own community outreach

627
00:28:37,914 --> 00:28:40,714
Speaker 2: program like it's a lot, a lot. I do think

628
00:28:40,754 --> 00:28:43,674
Speaker 2: the lesson here is kind of like, stop telling people

629
00:28:43,714 --> 00:28:46,354
Speaker 2: to find your village. Also, if you don't have one,

630
00:28:47,114 --> 00:28:50,154
Speaker 2: like stop blaming yourself for not having one. It's not you.

631
00:28:50,354 --> 00:28:51,994
Speaker 2: I really want to buy it. I've been campaigning my

632
00:28:52,074 --> 00:28:54,954
Speaker 2: husband to buy like a people mover, because I want

633
00:28:54,954 --> 00:28:57,234
Speaker 2: to be the mum that takes all the kids to

634
00:28:57,434 --> 00:29:00,514
Speaker 2: like bastbal training and soccer training. I want to be there.

635
00:29:00,714 --> 00:29:06,994
Speaker 2: You're sure, you're like, yeah, I want the full bus

636
00:29:07,514 --> 00:29:09,554
Speaker 2: that goes around and picks up every kid.

637
00:29:09,914 --> 00:29:12,274
Speaker 3: That's so nice. One's that would be my worst night man.

638
00:29:12,314 --> 00:29:14,074
Speaker 3: But I love that view. And please come and pick

639
00:29:14,154 --> 00:29:15,994
Speaker 3: up my child anytime you want.

640
00:29:16,634 --> 00:29:18,754
Speaker 2: All right, it's up for recommendations. And what I love

641
00:29:18,794 --> 00:29:21,594
Speaker 2: the most about this week's is that they're all really

642
00:29:21,634 --> 00:29:23,914
Speaker 2: low cost. I feel like everywhere I look at the moment,

643
00:29:23,954 --> 00:29:26,394
Speaker 2: it's like say, oh, click, frenzy, spend, spend spent. So

644
00:29:26,434 --> 00:29:29,274
Speaker 2: I love that we are bringing three things that are

645
00:29:29,314 --> 00:29:32,954
Speaker 2: just very low cost. Yeah, it's refreshing.

646
00:29:33,874 --> 00:29:38,154
Speaker 1: Tight ass recommendations this week? Yes, yes, nice. That is what's.

647
00:29:37,874 --> 00:29:41,754
Speaker 3: Spurred mine on mine this week. I've found myself on

648
00:29:41,914 --> 00:29:43,794
Speaker 3: dense bean salad TikTok.

649
00:29:44,194 --> 00:29:47,514
Speaker 1: Have you seen this? I have not. I need you to.

650
00:29:47,874 --> 00:29:48,874
Speaker 1: It sounds unappealing.

651
00:29:48,994 --> 00:29:52,074
Speaker 3: Yeah, this girl, she's known now as DNSE Bean Salad

652
00:29:52,074 --> 00:29:55,114
Speaker 3: Girl Violet Witchell, but there's lots of recipes around, but

653
00:29:55,194 --> 00:29:57,834
Speaker 3: she basically just shared how she makes her meal. Preps

654
00:29:57,834 --> 00:30:00,634
Speaker 3: herself a dense bean salad at the beginning of every

655
00:30:00,634 --> 00:30:02,554
Speaker 3: week and it's the way she gets all her protein

656
00:30:02,634 --> 00:30:05,034
Speaker 3: and fiber and all the things. And I found out

657
00:30:05,074 --> 00:30:07,714
Speaker 3: this week my iron is on the floor. Law was

658
00:30:07,794 --> 00:30:10,234
Speaker 3: the term that my doctor used. So I'm trying to

659
00:30:10,274 --> 00:30:12,074
Speaker 3: eat a little better and this is kind of a

660
00:30:12,114 --> 00:30:14,554
Speaker 3: cheap way to do it. So it's just you chuck

661
00:30:14,594 --> 00:30:18,794
Speaker 3: in chickpeas and cannellini beans, cut up a bunch of

662
00:30:18,874 --> 00:30:22,714
Speaker 3: vegetables that you like, capsicum, cucumber, put some cheese in

663
00:30:22,754 --> 00:30:25,554
Speaker 3: there for interest, so fetter all those little boccan chini

664
00:30:25,634 --> 00:30:28,434
Speaker 3: bools so good. I put those in mine, cut up

665
00:30:28,474 --> 00:30:30,954
Speaker 3: some herbs, and then you can choose a protein.

666
00:30:31,034 --> 00:30:32,354
Speaker 1: So no, you don't have to cook it.

667
00:30:32,394 --> 00:30:34,114
Speaker 3: I just put a barbecue chicken in mind, because I

668
00:30:34,154 --> 00:30:37,154
Speaker 3: didn't want to stand around cooking chicken and then do

669
00:30:37,234 --> 00:30:40,794
Speaker 3: whatever dressing you like. Honest, she preferred she had a

670
00:30:40,874 --> 00:30:44,834
Speaker 3: dressing that was like olive oil, balsamic and mustard. I

671
00:30:44,834 --> 00:30:47,354
Speaker 3: think it was mixed together. We can link to some

672
00:30:47,394 --> 00:30:49,314
Speaker 3: of the videos because they're so great. You just kind

673
00:30:49,314 --> 00:30:51,034
Speaker 3: of make it whatever you want it to be. And

674
00:30:51,074 --> 00:30:52,994
Speaker 3: I've eaten it four days in a row. Now I

675
00:30:53,034 --> 00:30:55,794
Speaker 3: feel so full. I think it cost maybe like three

676
00:30:55,914 --> 00:30:57,954
Speaker 3: bucks a serve and it actually kept.

677
00:30:58,354 --> 00:30:59,874
Speaker 1: I thought it would be gross by the end of

678
00:30:59,914 --> 00:31:00,594
Speaker 1: the week, but it's not.

679
00:31:00,754 --> 00:31:04,394
Speaker 4: That reminds me. I once read that Jennifer Aniston ate

680
00:31:04,474 --> 00:31:08,234
Speaker 4: the same chopped salad every day of Friends filming for

681
00:31:08,274 --> 00:31:10,954
Speaker 4: the entire yeahow, yeah, it feels like you've found in

682
00:31:11,034 --> 00:31:12,074
Speaker 4: Jennifer Aniston group.

683
00:31:12,274 --> 00:31:12,554
Speaker 1: Maybe.

684
00:31:12,554 --> 00:31:14,354
Speaker 3: I mean, I'll probably be bored of it by next week,

685
00:31:14,394 --> 00:31:16,674
Speaker 3: but it's a great one to have in the rotation, and.

686
00:31:16,594 --> 00:31:17,634
Speaker 1: It tastes really good.

687
00:31:17,994 --> 00:31:21,434
Speaker 3: From someone who's never eaten a bean really before this,

688
00:31:21,714 --> 00:31:22,474
Speaker 3: I'm loving it.

689
00:31:22,634 --> 00:31:23,354
Speaker 2: How's your tomb?

690
00:31:23,834 --> 00:31:27,154
Speaker 1: Oh? Look, my tomb did go into panic mode on

691
00:31:27,234 --> 00:31:27,674
Speaker 1: day one.

692
00:31:27,794 --> 00:31:31,714
Speaker 3: I won't lie day four and now fine, great, I

693
00:31:31,794 --> 00:31:32,514
Speaker 3: feel quite good.

694
00:31:33,114 --> 00:31:35,514
Speaker 2: Are you having to step outside of the office every

695
00:31:35,554 --> 00:31:39,474
Speaker 2: few hours just to release No, seriously.

696
00:31:39,554 --> 00:31:41,274
Speaker 1: It's fine. The first day I had it, I was

697
00:31:41,314 --> 00:31:45,594
Speaker 1: working from home. Thank god. Okay that's your tip. Kay,

698
00:31:45,874 --> 00:31:47,394
Speaker 1: have it at home. Yeah, I have it at home.

699
00:31:47,434 --> 00:31:49,314
Speaker 1: The first day you eat it and then you'll be fine.

700
00:31:49,554 --> 00:31:50,914
Speaker 1: What's your wreck this week? Month?

701
00:31:51,434 --> 00:31:54,674
Speaker 2: Do you want to know how Christmas trees on display

702
00:31:54,754 --> 00:31:56,194
Speaker 2: looks so good and full?

703
00:31:56,794 --> 00:32:00,634
Speaker 4: Is this because you've been on that Facebook group about Christmas?

704
00:32:00,634 --> 00:32:02,434
Speaker 1: Again? Like, I can't say I've.

705
00:32:04,074 --> 00:32:06,274
Speaker 4: Asked a question which I don't think either of us

706
00:32:06,274 --> 00:32:09,234
Speaker 4: has ever wanted, but now I need to.

707
00:32:09,194 --> 00:32:10,434
Speaker 1: Know now you've said it.

708
00:32:10,554 --> 00:32:14,514
Speaker 2: Yes, obviously I've been on Christmas Mom's Australia. It's my

709
00:32:14,514 --> 00:32:17,834
Speaker 2: favorite Facebook group. You don't judge me and guess what

710
00:32:17,954 --> 00:32:19,274
Speaker 2: our tree is already up.

711
00:32:19,794 --> 00:32:22,754
Speaker 1: Of course I'm actually judging your hard for that.

712
00:32:23,074 --> 00:32:24,954
Speaker 2: I know you are. I don't care.

713
00:32:25,034 --> 00:32:28,154
Speaker 3: There's two types of people in this world. No Christmas

714
00:32:28,194 --> 00:32:30,954
Speaker 3: tree people and December Christmas tree people.

715
00:32:31,594 --> 00:32:34,354
Speaker 2: If you have an artificial tree that always looks spindly

716
00:32:34,394 --> 00:32:36,314
Speaker 2: and a bit shit to listen up.

717
00:32:36,394 --> 00:32:37,474
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm taking notes.

718
00:32:37,874 --> 00:32:41,794
Speaker 2: You need to fluff your tree. This is where I

719
00:32:41,874 --> 00:32:44,394
Speaker 2: learned this on the page. You put gloves on, you

720
00:32:44,434 --> 00:32:48,794
Speaker 2: sit down and branch by branch, you spend time with

721
00:32:48,914 --> 00:32:52,554
Speaker 2: your tree. No separating the branches fluffy.

722
00:32:52,994 --> 00:32:55,234
Speaker 4: I think I should interrupt you and say that when

723
00:32:55,274 --> 00:32:57,234
Speaker 4: we were going through what we were going to bring today,

724
00:32:57,474 --> 00:33:01,314
Speaker 4: you wrote in a message that you wanked your Christmas tree,

725
00:33:01,514 --> 00:33:02,554
Speaker 4: and that is.

726
00:33:02,634 --> 00:33:03,314
Speaker 1: What you called.

727
00:33:03,394 --> 00:33:06,434
Speaker 2: Yes, I do call it wanking the tree, because that's

728
00:33:06,474 --> 00:33:09,554
Speaker 2: what it feels like. You're just running your hands along

729
00:33:09,594 --> 00:33:12,794
Speaker 2: the branches. You get a bit sweaty, it's hard, you know,

730
00:33:12,874 --> 00:33:13,474
Speaker 2: it's a bit.

731
00:33:13,474 --> 00:33:16,634
Speaker 4: You're wearing gloves while you which is odd.

732
00:33:17,154 --> 00:33:19,394
Speaker 2: It's a bit boring in the middle, but at the

733
00:33:19,474 --> 00:33:24,114
Speaker 2: end it's very satisfying. So that is the secret. The

734
00:33:24,154 --> 00:33:27,394
Speaker 2: more you fluff, the fuller it looks. So we have

735
00:33:27,514 --> 00:33:30,474
Speaker 2: an Audi tree and I fluffed the shit out of

736
00:33:30,514 --> 00:33:33,114
Speaker 2: it and it looks okay like it's no Balsom Hills.

737
00:33:33,154 --> 00:33:35,474
Speaker 2: But that's okay, Like we're not on a Balsom Hills budget.

738
00:33:35,554 --> 00:33:39,874
Speaker 2: We're on an Audi budget. So we do hills. Oh, Amelia, Amelia,

739
00:33:40,514 --> 00:33:43,194
Speaker 2: all the things I could teach you about Christmas. Balsom

740
00:33:43,274 --> 00:33:48,474
Speaker 2: Hills trees are like the Vogue tree, the Vogue Christmas Tree,

741
00:33:48,554 --> 00:33:54,354
Speaker 2: Vogue standard. They're like incredibly expensive, incredibly lifelike. These trees

742
00:33:54,474 --> 00:33:57,914
Speaker 2: cost like one thousand dollars. I've been campaigning for one

743
00:33:58,114 --> 00:34:01,194
Speaker 2: for five years now, and every time my husband says

744
00:34:01,434 --> 00:34:03,794
Speaker 2: we're not a Balsam Hills family, We're an Audi family.

745
00:34:03,874 --> 00:34:04,914
Speaker 2: I say, you're right, darling.

746
00:34:05,314 --> 00:34:07,274
Speaker 3: I bet you don't have to wank the ball some

747
00:34:07,394 --> 00:34:09,834
Speaker 3: Hills trees. I bet they are just come out of

748
00:34:09,873 --> 00:34:11,033
Speaker 3: the box perfect.

749
00:34:11,314 --> 00:34:16,834
Speaker 2: Every year, every tree wanks. Every tree needs a wanking.

750
00:34:16,954 --> 00:34:19,674
Speaker 2: So that's my weekend tip. Get to wang in your tree.

751
00:34:19,914 --> 00:34:22,553
Speaker 4: Well, I'm going to suggest something on ABC I View

752
00:34:22,594 --> 00:34:24,514
Speaker 4: because I just think they're going to move on.

753
00:34:24,834 --> 00:34:29,274
Speaker 1: A palette cleanser for us after that conversation. It is

754
00:34:29,314 --> 00:34:32,473
Speaker 1: called Hard Quiz Kids. Back in my day, kids were

755
00:34:32,514 --> 00:34:33,754
Speaker 1: seen and not heard.

756
00:34:34,114 --> 00:34:36,594
Speaker 3: Now we're forced to see them and hear them on

757
00:34:36,714 --> 00:34:37,993
Speaker 3: Hard Quiz Kids.

758
00:34:39,314 --> 00:34:39,874
Speaker 1: Let's play.

759
00:34:40,954 --> 00:34:43,674
Speaker 4: This is Tom Gleason's trivia show for kids. It's in

760
00:34:43,674 --> 00:34:46,433
Speaker 4: the middle of its second season and I'm recommending it

761
00:34:46,474 --> 00:34:50,874
Speaker 4: because it's a fun, intergenerational show. So, speaking of village,

762
00:34:50,954 --> 00:34:55,433
Speaker 4: when we get together with my parents for dinner, you

763
00:34:55,434 --> 00:34:57,274
Speaker 4: know you like to watch something else. It's really hard

764
00:34:57,274 --> 00:35:00,913
Speaker 4: to find something that appeals to a five year old

765
00:35:00,954 --> 00:35:03,674
Speaker 4: and a seventy five year old, but this is it.

766
00:35:03,834 --> 00:35:07,114
Speaker 4: Everyone gets involved, everyone plays along, shouts out their answers.

767
00:35:07,674 --> 00:35:08,714
Speaker 1: It's very good.

768
00:35:09,234 --> 00:35:11,274
Speaker 2: Are the kids a bit precocious?

769
00:35:11,554 --> 00:35:14,274
Speaker 4: They are, and I think they're very good role models

770
00:35:14,314 --> 00:35:18,154
Speaker 4: for little kids because they're so confident and passionate about

771
00:35:18,154 --> 00:35:21,194
Speaker 4: their pet subject. And I love seeing kids get really

772
00:35:21,314 --> 00:35:22,194
Speaker 4: into something.

773
00:35:23,314 --> 00:35:25,314
Speaker 2: There are a lot of dinosaurs as subjects.

774
00:35:25,594 --> 00:35:27,594
Speaker 4: The interesting thing is that they're not really allowed to

775
00:35:27,634 --> 00:35:30,554
Speaker 4: repeat subjects, so some of them get really niche, just

776
00:35:30,594 --> 00:35:33,473
Speaker 4: as they do on the main show. Like Minecraft has

777
00:35:33,554 --> 00:35:35,913
Speaker 4: definitely been exhausted. If you are a kid who wants

778
00:35:35,954 --> 00:35:39,234
Speaker 4: to go on hard Quiz Kids, you cannot do Minecraft

779
00:35:39,314 --> 00:35:40,674
Speaker 4: or dinosaurs or Harry Pots.

780
00:35:41,234 --> 00:35:45,034
Speaker 3: They each have like a specialty subject they okay, yeah, yeah,

781
00:35:45,114 --> 00:35:46,234
Speaker 3: oh so cute.

782
00:35:46,514 --> 00:35:46,913
Speaker 1: Love it.

783
00:35:47,394 --> 00:35:49,234
Speaker 2: That's all we have time for this week on Parenting

784
00:35:49,234 --> 00:35:51,074
Speaker 2: out Loud. If you're looking for something to listen to,

785
00:35:51,394 --> 00:35:55,154
Speaker 2: next our episode from last week in case you missed it,

786
00:35:55,194 --> 00:35:57,433
Speaker 2: has been our most downloaded one yet. Like we had

787
00:35:57,434 --> 00:36:00,594
Speaker 2: this big chat about sleep deprivations parents, so it's well

788
00:36:00,594 --> 00:36:02,674
Speaker 2: worth going back if you missed it the first time round.

789
00:36:03,194 --> 00:36:05,034
Speaker 2: Have a great week. Will be back in this feed

790
00:36:05,234 --> 00:36:06,194
Speaker 2: next Saturday morning.

791
00:36:06,514 --> 00:36:07,513
Speaker 1: Bye Bye.

792
00:36:11,154 --> 00:36:13,794
Speaker 2: MoMA. Mea acknowledges the traditional owners of the land on

793
00:36:13,834 --> 00:36:15,434
Speaker 2: which we have recorded this podcast