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Speaker 1: Hello, lovely neighborhood, and welcome to our Olympic Spotlight series.

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Speaker 1: As you will know, we are back recording new episodes

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Speaker 1: after our extended ninety two business month hiatus, now that

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Speaker 1: mum life is becoming a little bit smoother, but given

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Speaker 1: that we find ourselves in the middle of Paris twenty

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Speaker 1: twenty four and it is such a special time for

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Speaker 1: the whole world. I love the Olympics so much I

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Speaker 1: get emotional every time, I thought we'd also do a

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Speaker 1: little Olympic re release series. We are so lucky to

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Speaker 1: have had so many incredible Olympians as past guests, who

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Speaker 1: are also competing right now over in Paris. And while

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Speaker 1: our conversations are from a while back, so please mind

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Speaker 1: the outdated time references. The essence of this show is

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Speaker 1: reflecting on people's different chapters along the way, and I

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Speaker 1: thought it would be fascinating to reflect on how far

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Speaker 1: they've all come since our last chat, some of which

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Speaker 1: were even before the last Olympics in Tokyo. As I

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Speaker 1: mentioned last episode, athletes aren't allowed to record from the

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Speaker 1: Olympic village and or they can do interviews, but they

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Speaker 1: can't do audio and video, and we did have a

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Speaker 1: few podcast interviews lined up that we had to postpost,

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Speaker 1: which is why we couldn't do catch up episodes with

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Speaker 1: these guests. But we do have a future record after

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Speaker 1: the Olympics are over, so stay tuned for those in

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Speaker 1: the meantime. I hope you are all loving watching along

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Speaker 1: and enjoy these throwback listens. Today's guest is absolute legend

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Speaker 1: Harry Garside, who we spoke to last after Tokyo twenty

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Speaker 1: twenty when he won Australia's first medal in boxing at

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Speaker 1: the Olympics in over three decades. He had hoped to

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Speaker 1: come back to win Australia's first gold medal in boxing

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Speaker 1: this year in Paris, but sadly, just a few days

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Speaker 1: ago he lost to Richard Kovacs and was absolutely shatted

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Speaker 1: to have to say goodbye to that dream. For this

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Speaker 1: round of the Olympics, it's been heart wrenching but also

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Speaker 1: so inspiring at the same time to watch Harry go

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Speaker 1: through the emotions of heartbreak and those really human feelings

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Speaker 1: of failure that I think we forget people at that

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Speaker 1: elite level also have. They're just people as well, and

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Speaker 1: yet they have to go through those.

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Speaker 2: Kind of feelings.

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Speaker 1: So publicly, but then he's been able to follow it

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Speaker 1: up with some really powerful reflections as he starts to

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Speaker 1: kind of orientate himself again. And he has such an

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Speaker 1: amazing philosophy on achieving greatness, as you'll hear in this episode,

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Speaker 1: and that has continued on in the way that he's

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Speaker 1: dealt with everything in the last few days. If anything,

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Speaker 1: I kind of think it's almost more inspiring to watch

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Speaker 1: someone cope with things when they don't go well than

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Speaker 1: when they go exactly to plan. And in his latest

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Speaker 1: video on Instagram, he explains that he's just so grateful

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Speaker 1: over the past few years, through both the highs and

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Speaker 1: the lows on the journey towards his Olympic goals and

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Speaker 1: his goals generally in the sport, that he's really learned

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Speaker 1: to become his own friend, which is such a beautiful

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Speaker 1: and inspiring takeaway. And he just remains now in all

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Speaker 1: the press as reflective and articulate as he was during

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Speaker 1: our chat. He actually just blew me away with his

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Speaker 1: ability to talk through his mentality and his mindset. So

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Speaker 1: I hope you guys enjoy listening back to this one

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Speaker 1: as much as I did. Busy and Happy are not

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Speaker 1: the same thing. We too rarely question what makes the

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Speaker 1: heart seeing. We work, then we rest, but rarely we

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Speaker 1: play and often don't realize there's more than one way.

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Speaker 1: So this is a platform to hear and explore the

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Speaker 1: stories of those who found lives they adore, the good,

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Speaker 1: bad and ugly. The best and worst day will bear

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Speaker 1: all the facets of seizing your yea. I'm Sarah Davidson

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Speaker 1: or a spoonful of Sarah, a lawyer turned funentrepreneur who

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Speaker 1: swapped the suits and heels to co found matcha Maiden

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Speaker 1: and matcha Milk bar. Sez the Ya is a series

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Speaker 1: of conversations on finding a life you love and exploring

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Speaker 1: the self doubt, challenge, joy and.

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Speaker 2: Fulfillment along the way.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back, Lovely, yeahbehood. I couldn't think of a cooler

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Speaker 1: guest to kick off the second half of the year

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Speaker 1: with than the legend that I have in store for

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Speaker 1: you today. You probably know by now that I get

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Speaker 1: so excited by people whose brains tick as crazily and

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Speaker 1: as deeply as mine likes to. So I was like

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Speaker 1: a kid in a candy store with this guest and

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Speaker 1: felt maybe the least articulate that I have in a

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Speaker 1: long time. Next year eloquence. I am endlessly fascinated by

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Speaker 1: Harry Garside, and seems most of Australia and the world

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Speaker 1: shares that view, and not only because he is a

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Speaker 1: championship boxer who won the nation's first medal in boxing

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Speaker 1: at the Olympics in over three decades in Tokyo. While

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Speaker 1: his rise to international success from losing ten out of

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Speaker 1: his first eighteen fights at the Humble Lilydell Youth Club

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Speaker 1: is also fascinating, I still don't think that's the reason

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Speaker 1: always so enamored with him. While Harry's upbringing and beloved

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Speaker 1: sport aligned very strongly with traditional ideas about masculinity and strength,

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Speaker 1: it's his unique passion for changing those stereotypes that I

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Speaker 1: fell in love with, complimenting his training with ballet classes

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Speaker 1: and wearing now polished to some of his fights, and

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Speaker 1: just when you think you've figured him out, he reveals

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Speaker 1: a whole new facet of himself and his view on

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Speaker 1: the world. And I could ramble on forever about how

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Speaker 1: much it stretched my own mind getting to have this

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Speaker 1: conversation with him. I'll let you hear more about it

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Speaker 1: for yourself. As he tells so perfectly, and I'm sure

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Speaker 1: you'll see from this conversation why. I just think he's

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Speaker 1: one of the most fascinating human beings.

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Speaker 2: This is one of my.

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Speaker 1: Favorite episodes all year, so I hope you enjoy it

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Speaker 1: as much as I did. Harry Garside, Welcome to Seize

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Speaker 1: the AA.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you for having me on.

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Speaker 2: I'm so excited.

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Speaker 1: As I mentioned, I've been fangirling from Afar and my

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Speaker 1: partner Nick has been doing the same. We've followed your

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Speaker 1: journey for a while now, and it's so so nice

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Speaker 1: to have you on the show.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm blessed to be on my part. As I

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Speaker 3: was saying to you before the show, we're having a

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Speaker 3: good stalk of you Instagram last night and we'll love it.

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Speaker 1: I'm a total message, an absolute car accident. I love it,

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Speaker 1: which leads really nicely to.

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Speaker 2: Our little icebreaker.

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Speaker 1: Before I get into the first section of the show,

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Speaker 1: I like to start every episode just by asking everyone

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Speaker 1: what the most down to earth thing is about them

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Speaker 1: to break through what can often be a pretty glossy surface,

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Speaker 1: especially when you know, we mentioned just before we started

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Speaker 1: recording that you've been to the Olympics. You have some

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Speaker 1: amazing achievements under your belt, and if people walk into

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Speaker 1: your life right now, they often see, you know, a

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Speaker 1: really polish side of you, forgetting that there's so much

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Speaker 1: else beneath the surface. But I think it's really important

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Speaker 1: from the beginning to sort of highlight the things about

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Speaker 1: you that are really human and really normal. So what's

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Speaker 1: something really relatable about you?

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Speaker 3: I think, well, I know more so. I had an

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Speaker 3: experience when I was about eight. I think it's about

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Speaker 3: at seven or eight, and I was traveling through the

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Speaker 3: Northern Territory with my family, and I just remember driving

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Speaker 3: through an indigenous community and I was looking out the

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Speaker 3: window and there was young kids playing and they're in poverty,

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Speaker 3: like very poverty stricken conditions, and I just remember thinking,

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Speaker 3: in that moment, what is the difference between me and

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Speaker 3: that young kid. Obviously at the time, I was too young,

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Speaker 3: I didn't fully understand what was going on. But looking

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Speaker 3: back at my life as a twenty four year old,

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Speaker 3: I've just never thought that I'm better than anyone. I've

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Speaker 3: never and it's a blessing and a curse because it's

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Speaker 3: also the thing that made me lose at the Olympics,

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Speaker 3: and it's also the thing that, Yeah, so it's a

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Speaker 3: blessing and a curse in the sense of, like I've

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Speaker 3: never once sort of looked down on people or anything

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Speaker 3: like that. And I had that from an early age

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Speaker 3: at seven or eight when I was in the Northern Territory.

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Speaker 3: And then, as I said, it's a bit of a

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Speaker 3: curse as well, going to the Olympics and fighting the

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Speaker 3: favorite to win the gold medal and kind of losing

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Speaker 3: the fight before I even got in there because I

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Speaker 3: didn't fully believe that I was better than him. And yeah,

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Speaker 3: so there's two sides of each coin. I'd always try

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Speaker 3: my hardest to understand that we're all just human, that's it,

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Speaker 3: and doesn't matter where people start in life, but like

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Speaker 3: you can always get to where they are, you just

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Speaker 3: have to work hard, be consistent. But yeah's and that's

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Speaker 3: probably the thing that I think is pretty down to

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Speaker 3: worth about me.

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Speaker 1: That is one of my favorite answers in like three

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Speaker 1: hundred every cents. I think that's so fascinating because I

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Speaker 1: think that is one thing that comes across really clearly.

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Speaker 1: Like in researching for the episode, I was watching you know,

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Speaker 1: your interviews from quite a few different things. Immediately before

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Speaker 1: the Olympics just after more and like that real humility

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Speaker 1: of like being able to get on other people's level

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Speaker 1: and also knowing that you didn't start with a leg up.

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Speaker 1: You know we're just talking about before. Like that comes

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Speaker 1: through so clearly, but it's also interesting, Like it's so endearing.

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Speaker 1: It's what makes the nation love you so much. Like

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Speaker 1: I've never thought about the psychology of the competitive edge

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Speaker 1: that you lose if you're too humble, Like there's like

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Speaker 1: that weird line in the middle where you want to

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Speaker 1: always be down to worth, but you also have to

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Speaker 1: be able to talk yourself up when you need you.

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Speaker 3: That's so interesting an innovation leader. Yeah, so when you're

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Speaker 3: with us, just like that could be sorry, yeah it's

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Speaker 3: gone now, Like is this a commercial? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: I was like, is he answering for you? Is this

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Speaker 2: your spokesperson?

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Speaker 3: Sorry? Chats?

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Speaker 2: That was the best? Oh my god, I love.

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Speaker 3: Both so confutered, I was like.

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Speaker 2: What is commercial break?

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Speaker 1: It's like, no guest has ever brought their own to

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Speaker 1: the show, but like, sure, I'm humble, but not that

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Speaker 1: I brought my own sponsors with me. That was also

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Speaker 1: one amazing start of the episode. I'm totally leaving that

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Speaker 1: in Oh, But yeah, I just think I think the

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Speaker 1: psychology around that is so interesting. And later on we'll

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Speaker 1: get to that whole fine line between like confidence and

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Speaker 1: then self doubt and then not being too overconfident, but

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Speaker 1: then not selling yourself so short that you can't actually

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Speaker 1: perform when you want to, and undervaluing your skills and

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Speaker 1: obviously immense talent. But it's so nice. You mentioned before

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Speaker 1: we started recording as well, that you know, you came

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Speaker 1: from really humble beginnings. Your parents weren't Olympians, you didn't

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Speaker 1: come from a background that it immediately makes sense that

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Speaker 1: you've gone to the Olympics and competed at.

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Speaker 2: Such a high level.

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Speaker 1: You you know, don't know anyone who went to None

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Speaker 1: of your kind of friends from childhood went to university,

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Speaker 1: And I think that too, is like all the obvious

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Speaker 1: markers for a really successful climb of the ladder weren't

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Speaker 1: necessarily there to begin with, but you've still done it.

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Speaker 1: So my first section of every podcast is your wayta,

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Speaker 1: which is your pathway tracing back from childhood. To remind

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Speaker 1: everyone like it's almost never a smooth journey. It's almost

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Speaker 1: never what you expect. It's going to be, but the

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Speaker 1: top poids all connect eventually when you look back. So

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Speaker 1: take us back to young you, youngest of three boys,

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Speaker 1: blokey dad, bit of a softer mum, and like what

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Speaker 1: your childhood was like.

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Speaker 3: I feel so blessed that I get the opportunity to

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Speaker 3: constantly sort of like think about my childhood. This every

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Speaker 3: time I do a podcast is almost like a psychology session,

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Speaker 3: which which is unreal. So I learned something new every

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Speaker 3: time I tell a story. And for me, I was

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Speaker 3: really fortunate to be the youngest of three boys and

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Speaker 3: always felt super loved and super connected by my family.

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Speaker 3: But at the same time, I felt quite different to

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Speaker 3: my two brothers and of course my dad, and I

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Speaker 3: was just a little bit softer to them. They were

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Speaker 3: pretty rough around the edges and really good people, really

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Speaker 3: kind people. But me personally, I just felt I was

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Speaker 3: more connected to my mum's energy and what my mum

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Speaker 3: was doing, and I didn't particularly want to do what

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Speaker 3: the guys are doing in my family. Every time I

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Speaker 3: was sort of doing what they were doing, I sort

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Speaker 3: of didn't fully enjoy it, but I was more so

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Speaker 3: doing it to fit in. And it's probably half the

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Speaker 3: reason I started boxing. As well, and just super fortunate

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Speaker 3: that I fell in love with the sport within the

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Speaker 3: first week and the places it's taken me in the

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Speaker 3: man that I am now because of that, it's pretty crazy.

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Speaker 3: But initially I didn't start it because I really wanted to.

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Speaker 3: I started it more so to sort of be a man,

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Speaker 3: or to prove I was a man and to my

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Speaker 3: brothers and my dad.

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Speaker 1: Wow, that's so interesting that again, like you think that

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Speaker 1: so many boys get into boxing because it is like

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Speaker 1: a marker of masculinity, but yours was more to prove

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Speaker 1: that you had that, even though that's not necessarily kind

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Speaker 1: of like it was like a mask of on the

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Speaker 1: outside to fit in. And it's so interesting when we're

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Speaker 1: younger how much effort and time and how much of

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Speaker 1: our identity goes into just trying to fit in and

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Speaker 1: just trying to make sense of like who we are.

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Speaker 1: But very very fortunate that you turned out to love

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Speaker 1: it so much. And it's interesting that you started at

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Speaker 1: such a young age, like nine, and most kids when

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Speaker 1: they start something at nine, it's very rare that you.

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Speaker 2: Actually go on to do that as a job.

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Speaker 1: So how did you progress from like a childhood activity

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Speaker 1: to like I'm going to go to the Olympics. Like

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Speaker 1: when did that from just stumbling into something to like

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Speaker 1: doing really well at it actually happen.

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Speaker 3: I feel for me, I was just a sporting fan

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Speaker 3: from the age of like six, seven, eight years old,

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Speaker 3: so I always wanted to, like your dream of representing

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Speaker 3: your country at the biggest event. I always watched the Olympics,

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Speaker 3: coming of Games, anything Australia was playing in. I just

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Speaker 3: loved sport. And when I started boxing, I didn't fully

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Speaker 3: know that you could go to the Olympics for boxing.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, as I slowly progress through through the boxing career,

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Speaker 3: I'm very fortunate as well that my coach, who's still

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Speaker 3: my coach to date, he's eighty years old. He's a

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Speaker 3: veteran of the sport, and he sort of just made

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Speaker 3: me feel special. He fed me with a lot of love,

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Speaker 3: a lot of He says things like, oh, you're so

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Speaker 3: naturally gifted. Your footwork is impeccable, and he would say

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Speaker 3: things like that and I would feel so good. But

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Speaker 3: then looking back now, he pretty much sended you every

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Speaker 3: kid that walked into that everything that walks into that gym,

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Speaker 3: So I'm known special. I just took it and I

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Speaker 3: fully believed it. And I think as well, there's two

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Speaker 3: reasons as to why I kept going I wasn't successful

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Speaker 3: very early on, but the reasons why I kept going

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Speaker 3: back was one because of him. He fed me with

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Speaker 3: so much the love and positivity made me feel good

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Speaker 3: about myself. And the second is because boxing gave me

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Speaker 3: an identity that I always wanted to be sort of

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Speaker 3: a tough guy, to prove that I was a man,

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Speaker 3: and it gave me that, especially in my primary school

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Speaker 3: years and high school years, and I was searching for

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Speaker 3: that for a long time and I finally got it.

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Speaker 3: And yeah, that's the read. They're the two reasons why

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Speaker 3: I think I kept going back and I kept loving it.

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Speaker 3: And then also as well, the feeling boxing gives me

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Speaker 3: is quite electric as well.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Wow, if we just had Men's Health Work a

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Speaker 1: couple of weeks ago and we did an episode, we

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Speaker 1: do one every year, and the constantly recurring theme is

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Speaker 1: this like outdated view of masculinity that has forced so

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Speaker 1: many men into really convoluted either behaviors or just ways

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Speaker 1: of thinking about their identity and pushes you to do

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Speaker 1: certain things and be certain ways when now I think

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Speaker 1: it's getting a lot better, and role models like yourself

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Speaker 1: who are challenging those stereotypes are amazing and allowing younger

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Speaker 1: boys to not necessarily think they always need to be

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Speaker 1: this marcho person. But I think you've become an amazing

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Speaker 1: role model for breaking down those stereotypes, and I definitely

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Speaker 1: want to get to that point. But I think another

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Speaker 1: really important thing is also we have this instant gratuity thing.

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Speaker 1: Right if we're not winning and we're not good at something,

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Speaker 1: straight away, I personally give up pretty easily. Like I

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Speaker 1: think I'm resilient, but it's sin or something's a little

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Speaker 1: bit hard. I'm like, uh, but it's interesting that you know,

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Speaker 1: I've heard you say that you up until kind of

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Speaker 1: your teenage years, you'd lost more fights than you'd won.

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Speaker 1: You lost ten out of your first eighteen fights at

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Speaker 1: Lillardale Youths Club, And even with someone an amazing supporter

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Speaker 1: in your corner telling you you're really good, you know,

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Speaker 1: most people don't.

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Speaker 2: Have the strength to kind of keep going.

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Speaker 1: So I think the quote that I really love is

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Speaker 1: the idea that life rewards you on your fifth or sixth,

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Speaker 1: or ninth or tenth try so never give up, because

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Speaker 1: it's probably the time you give up is usually just

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Speaker 1: before the one where it's actually going to work. What

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Speaker 1: did go through your mind to get you through? What

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Speaker 1: gave you your eyes on the prize even when it

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Speaker 1: did feel so far away.

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Speaker 3: That's a really good question. There's so many things a

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Speaker 3: play into that I hate giving up, and I think

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Speaker 3: the younger it's a blessing and a curse that as well,

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Speaker 3: because there needs to be a time where you actually

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Speaker 3: like you need to logically look at something and go wow.

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Speaker 3: It's say, in a relationship, is it time to walk away?

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Speaker 3: Or is it time to end this friendship? Or you

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Speaker 3: mean you've actually got to look at it. And I

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Speaker 3: really struggled to do those things. And yeah, I just

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Speaker 3: truly wanted to achieve good things in my sport of boxing.

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Speaker 3: And there was many people who my family members', close friends,

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Speaker 3: even my coach who I love On a door, I

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Speaker 3: said a couple of things to me throughout that process

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Speaker 3: where it made me really think like am I cut

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Speaker 3: out for this? And am I ever going to achieve

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Speaker 3: what I want to achieve in my boxing career? And

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Speaker 3: there was always just a little boy inside of me

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Speaker 3: that truly believes that I could be an astronaut, you

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Speaker 3: know what I mean. The kids are so that can

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Speaker 3: dream so hard, and I still got that inside of

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Speaker 3: me now, Like it doesn't happen all the time, and

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Speaker 3: it's not as loud as what it was when I

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Speaker 3: was a kid, but still there. Like I truly believe

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Speaker 3: if I set my mind to something, I can achieve anything.

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Speaker 3: And I think that's something that I personally feel the

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Speaker 3: younger generations missing out on it. It's not their fault

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Speaker 3: in the sense of like, if you want instant money,

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Speaker 3: go get crypto NFTs. If you want instant look good,

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Speaker 3: go get botox, Go get your tummy tuck. If you

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Speaker 3: want it's just instant gratification, go on Instagram and upload

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Speaker 3: a photo and edit it heaps. Like everything's so instant,

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Speaker 3: And I think even like you get a TV now

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Speaker 3: in the last two or three years, you're a TV

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Speaker 3: sixty years ago, it probably still last now. Everything's just

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Speaker 3: so instant and it's disposable, and I just great things

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Speaker 3: take a lot of time. And I'm sure you can

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Speaker 3: voucher that I saw in your bio that you're a lawyer,

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Speaker 3: like that would have taken a long time, and the

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Speaker 3: feeling you get after the six, seven, eight years how

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Speaker 3: it took you is amazing. It's electric, and I think

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Speaker 3: young people need to understand that it takes a long

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Speaker 3: time to get great things.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, that is the perfect sound bite for

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Speaker 1: this entire show and everything I try and convey that,

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Speaker 1: like any climb worth climbing, or any journey worth embarking on,

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Speaker 1: is most of the great ones aren't overnight. They might

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Speaker 1: look overnight because you only see the tiny tip of

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Speaker 1: the mountain, but all the grueling times of rejections and

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Speaker 1: setbacks and you know, failures or like failures, even though

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Speaker 1: I think like failures are really a learning curve that

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Speaker 1: propel you forwards in some way, there's just so much

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Speaker 1: that comes before everyone's journey.

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Speaker 2: And you're so right about that instagratuity thing.

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Speaker 1: Like we were just a couple of weeks ago in

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Speaker 1: Egypt for our honeymoon, and I was laughing about how

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Speaker 1: like we have to repaint our house every five years

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Speaker 1: because like the paint fades, you know, from the sun

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Speaker 1: in five years time, These colors that you could see

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Speaker 1: on the wall from like five thousand years ago and

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Speaker 1: they're still lasting and I'm.

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Speaker 2: Like, what has happened to humanity?

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Speaker 1: Where we want everything here and now and we don't

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Speaker 1: care if it lasts. But the idea of like patience

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Speaker 1: and not making one no as like a permanent no.

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Speaker 3: You know.

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Speaker 1: I think many people, if they had faced more failures

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Speaker 1: than wins, you know, that would have been the end

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Speaker 1: for them. But if you had let that topple you,

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Speaker 1: you never would have found out you could have gone

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Speaker 1: to the Olympics. So I think you're such a good

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Speaker 1: example of like, just keep going, just keep believing that

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Speaker 1: you know, it's worth trying the next tribe because you

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Speaker 1: never know when we'll be the try that actually ends

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Speaker 1: up getting you to a national championship, to then the

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Speaker 1: comm Games, to then the Olympics. And I can't even

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Speaker 1: imagine what that was like when that actually happened. So

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Speaker 1: what do you think was the turning point? Was it

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Speaker 1: a skill thing that you just trained differently? Was it

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Speaker 1: I know that you did some work with the Reach Foundation.

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Speaker 1: Do you that was twelve months before your first nationals?

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Speaker 1: Was that the turning point more mentally than physically? Like,

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Speaker 1: what do you think changed?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like it's a it's a cocktail of

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Speaker 3: things and Reach is a massive the Reach foundation for

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Speaker 3: those people who don't know as a youth organization, and

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Speaker 3: they entered my school when I was fifteen sixteen, and

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Speaker 3: prior to that I had no success in boxing. And

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Speaker 3: then a year after being involved, I finally won my

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Speaker 3: first nationals and they gave me the ability to have

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Speaker 3: space where I could just explore myself and explore the

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Speaker 3: world and stumble for be messy, fuck up and get

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Speaker 3: back up again. And I think that's such a valuable

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Speaker 3: place for a young person because I'm twenty four and

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Speaker 3: I still got no idea who I am, no idea.

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Speaker 3: I'm working it out slowly, and especially when I was

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Speaker 3: fifteen to sixteen, I had even less of an idea.

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Speaker 3: And I just think the space where you can really

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Speaker 3: stumble for triumph, experience things is a beautiful space. And

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Speaker 3: I'm really fortunate dance my life. And I think as well.

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Speaker 3: The ten weeks before my first national win, I remember

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Speaker 3: saying to myself, I want to give myself a bit

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Speaker 3: of an ultimatum. I said, if I don't win this,

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Speaker 3: I need to think about what I'm going to do

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Speaker 3: with my future. And I remember I gave ten weeks,

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Speaker 3: ten weeks of waking up at a certain time, really

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Speaker 3: focusing on showing up in every session, having an intention

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Speaker 3: and working my ass off, and then you mean, really

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Speaker 3: making sure I was doing everything I possibly could, all

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Speaker 3: the one percent is outside of the boxing gym to

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Speaker 3: the mindset stuff. And I finally got to my first

437
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:20,480
Speaker 3: Nationals knowing that I had done everything I could. Fortunately,

438
00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:22,240
Speaker 3: I definitely wasn't the favorite to take that out, and

439
00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,919
Speaker 3: I fortunately took it out. And I think it's because

440
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:27,960
Speaker 3: I didn't turn my back on myself throughout that process.

441
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:30,399
Speaker 3: You can lie to people, you can lie to your friends,

442
00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:32,240
Speaker 3: you can lie to your family, but you'll never lie

443
00:21:32,280 --> 00:21:35,480
Speaker 3: to yourself. And that's a beautiful place to be is

444
00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:37,160
Speaker 3: when you know you never lied to yourself.

445
00:21:38,119 --> 00:21:40,600
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I've never thought about it that way,

446
00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:42,800
Speaker 1: the idea of like not turning your back on yourself.

447
00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:45,040
Speaker 2: We're so focused on how we care for.

448
00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:47,960
Speaker 1: Others our interactions outwardly, but I think, yeah, the internal

449
00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:50,520
Speaker 1: work is what really can make a difference between you

450
00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:53,600
Speaker 1: getting where you want to go and not. And then

451
00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:56,480
Speaker 1: from there on it you just you just propelled to

452
00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:59,040
Speaker 1: Then you know, three years later, the Gold Coast common

453
00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:02,280
Speaker 1: Games and then the twenty twenty Summer Olympics, that childhood

454
00:22:02,359 --> 00:22:05,639
Speaker 1: dream that I imagine felt impossible for so long before

455
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:09,040
Speaker 1: winning what at the first time an Australian has won

456
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:10,080
Speaker 1: a medal in boxing in.

457
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,080
Speaker 2: Over three decades.

458
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:15,880
Speaker 1: Talk us through that, like as the dust settled, how

459
00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 1: do you feel? What was that like actually going to

460
00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:21,919
Speaker 1: the Olympics and from that, you know, twenty fifteen U

461
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:25,879
Speaker 1: to twenty twenty U. Obviously it was a big like

462
00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:29,320
Speaker 1: narrative change between like having you know, a losing streak

463
00:22:29,359 --> 00:22:31,720
Speaker 1: to suddenly being on this this up and up.

464
00:22:32,119 --> 00:22:35,040
Speaker 2: I read that you got hypnotized before the Olympics.

465
00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:38,040
Speaker 1: You're obviously like very open minded to a really you know,

466
00:22:38,119 --> 00:22:41,119
Speaker 1: all rounded way to prepare yourself for these things. What

467
00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:43,520
Speaker 1: was that five year stretch? Like, I just can't even

468
00:22:43,560 --> 00:22:46,360
Speaker 1: imagine after the start you had to then being like

469
00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:47,520
Speaker 1: our superstar.

470
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:50,480
Speaker 3: It was a crazy five years. But black looking back,

471
00:22:50,640 --> 00:22:54,160
Speaker 3: I was just really grateful that boxing Australia they gave

472
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:57,800
Speaker 3: me so many opportunities, so many opportunities to just go.

473
00:22:58,119 --> 00:23:00,440
Speaker 3: So I tried for the real Olympics and miss out

474
00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:03,560
Speaker 3: on two occasions to make the team, and then after

475
00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:06,520
Speaker 3: that it was really like I need to hone in

476
00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:10,480
Speaker 3: on a few things and started really focusing on mindset.

477
00:23:10,560 --> 00:23:13,240
Speaker 3: I put my room. There was about six Australian flags

478
00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:16,600
Speaker 3: in my room. There was Olympic paraphernalia everywhere, all photos

479
00:23:16,640 --> 00:23:19,680
Speaker 3: and it was quite psychotic. It was like like an

480
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:24,000
Speaker 3: eight year old boys. I didn't like to bring too

481
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:24,920
Speaker 3: many people over.

482
00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:27,640
Speaker 2: Manifestation.

483
00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:32,119
Speaker 3: I just really started to focus on the mindset stuff.

484
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:35,280
Speaker 3: And the older generation they like to trash the phone

485
00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:36,840
Speaker 3: use and stuff like that, but I think one of

486
00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:39,119
Speaker 3: the best things about the phone is that everything that

487
00:23:39,160 --> 00:23:42,160
Speaker 3: that finger tips and it's like you get the choice,

488
00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:44,239
Speaker 3: if you're conscious enough, you get the choice of what

489
00:23:44,280 --> 00:23:47,639
Speaker 3: you digest online. All this mindset stuff that I just

490
00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:49,960
Speaker 3: started like looking up online, what did all the greats do?

491
00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:53,399
Speaker 3: What did some people? Don't really like to some people

492
00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:56,240
Speaker 3: who I really got Kerry Pothurst and Natalie Cook, the

493
00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:59,720
Speaker 3: two thousand olympig Beach volleyballers gold medalists, I got a

494
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:01,440
Speaker 3: lot for. And then every time they went to the

495
00:24:01,520 --> 00:24:04,919
Speaker 3: shops they would buy something gold and gold was is

496
00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:08,399
Speaker 3: always on their mind and people like that. I was

497
00:24:08,400 --> 00:24:10,760
Speaker 3: like really sort of motivated and inspired by it. And

498
00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:13,800
Speaker 3: I slowly but surely changed my mindset and changed my

499
00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:17,720
Speaker 3: belief system from twenty fifteen twenty sixteen and then twenty

500
00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:19,720
Speaker 3: eighteen and of course twenty twenty. But there was a

501
00:24:19,720 --> 00:24:22,160
Speaker 3: lot of ups and downs in that process as well.

502
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:24,680
Speaker 3: But like something I want to add on what we're

503
00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:27,840
Speaker 3: talking about just before, around the process, Like you fail

504
00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:30,719
Speaker 3: so many times in the process. But I think one

505
00:24:30,760 --> 00:24:33,080
Speaker 3: of the biggest things is if you love what you do.

506
00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:35,840
Speaker 3: Of course we don't want to fail. It sucks, it's

507
00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:38,720
Speaker 3: the worst feeling, it's shit. But if you love what

508
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:42,640
Speaker 3: you do, like you sort of don't particularly care. It's

509
00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:45,399
Speaker 3: all about the journey and all about the process. Like

510
00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:48,600
Speaker 3: I kind of just really like boxing. I love representing Australia,

511
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:50,560
Speaker 3: and I love the feeling it gives me. And it's like,

512
00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:55,040
Speaker 3: of course I strive for greatness, but I'm just grateful

513
00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:56,679
Speaker 3: that I get to box in general.

514
00:24:58,280 --> 00:25:00,159
Speaker 1: I think it's so interesting as well that it's the

515
00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:02,880
Speaker 1: mindset you bring to something like a setback that really

516
00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:04,880
Speaker 1: changes the way you cope with it. Like I've sort

517
00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:09,040
Speaker 1: of really trained my brain to see a pain point

518
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:11,920
Speaker 1: or a setback or and something that would otherwise feel

519
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,040
Speaker 1: like a failure, as like if I immediately look for the

520
00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:16,680
Speaker 1: lesson in that then it's less painful because almost straight

521
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:19,040
Speaker 1: away you're like, oh this is silver ligning Like, of

522
00:25:19,080 --> 00:25:21,240
Speaker 1: course it's a little bit embarrassing, hurts your ego. But

523
00:25:21,640 --> 00:25:24,159
Speaker 1: if you know what to look for quicker, then the

524
00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:27,439
Speaker 1: pain part of it, it's so instantaneous compared to you know,

525
00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:29,760
Speaker 1: you could wallow, you could let it, you know, control you,

526
00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:32,160
Speaker 1: or consume you for weeks and weeks, or you could go, okay,

527
00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:35,000
Speaker 1: that's done. But actually this failure I'm going to use

528
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:36,960
Speaker 1: it as a failure forwards and it's going to better me.

529
00:25:37,080 --> 00:25:39,960
Speaker 1: For without the setbacks, you wouldn't actually progress, you'd just

530
00:25:40,240 --> 00:25:42,520
Speaker 1: be cruising along and never learn the things that you

531
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:44,600
Speaker 1: need to learn to better yourself for next time. So

532
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:47,560
Speaker 1: I love that you really embrace, like the macro is

533
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:49,920
Speaker 1: that you love what you do, so all the micro forward, back,

534
00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:51,840
Speaker 1: forward back is like part of part of.

535
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,600
Speaker 2: That journey and all slots in.

536
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:56,760
Speaker 1: One of the things I think is extraordinary about you

537
00:25:56,880 --> 00:25:59,760
Speaker 1: is you are only twenty four, and of course you've

538
00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:04,080
Speaker 1: had a lifetime worth of experience, but you're also incredibly

539
00:26:04,119 --> 00:26:08,560
Speaker 1: self aware and incredibly well adjusted for someone your age,

540
00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:11,879
Speaker 1: particularly for guys who tend to not necessarily get in

541
00:26:11,920 --> 00:26:14,400
Speaker 1: mass generalization but tend to not get to that real

542
00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:16,600
Speaker 1: self reflection so early. But it seems like you've had

543
00:26:16,600 --> 00:26:20,639
Speaker 1: that curiosity for understanding your mind and your identity and

544
00:26:21,119 --> 00:26:23,880
Speaker 1: looking at things in a less than traditional way and

545
00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:27,840
Speaker 1: experimenting with you know, ballet you started doing in twenty nineteen,

546
00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:32,720
Speaker 1: and even you know hypnotherapy is quite alternative. Have you

547
00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:34,200
Speaker 1: always been that curious?

548
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:36,480
Speaker 2: And where do you think you got that from?

549
00:26:36,800 --> 00:26:38,480
Speaker 3: I want to see credit a lot of it for

550
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:41,800
Speaker 3: my mum. So I'm super blessed that my mum is

551
00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:45,439
Speaker 3: super spiritual. She's a medium, so she talks to dead people.

552
00:26:46,080 --> 00:26:47,919
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's a media.

553
00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:51,119
Speaker 3: Yeah, pretty hectic. So growing up for me, like it

554
00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:54,080
Speaker 3: was a bit. She had tarot cards and crystals and

555
00:26:54,119 --> 00:26:55,760
Speaker 3: all that sort of hall and enjoy sort of stuff.

556
00:26:55,800 --> 00:27:03,439
Speaker 2: And hypno therapy is like level one basic for you.

557
00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:06,640
Speaker 3: No therapy was actually pretty full on though. I woke

558
00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:08,760
Speaker 3: up from it and I was bawling my eyes out.

559
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:10,960
Speaker 3: I was like, I remember what happened, and I was like,

560
00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:14,119
Speaker 3: it was quite amazing. And that's actually something that I

561
00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:16,879
Speaker 3: love most about myself, and I think I get it

562
00:27:16,880 --> 00:27:20,160
Speaker 3: from my mum, But it's my want and my ability

563
00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:24,960
Speaker 3: to literally try anything. I really don't think there's anything

564
00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:27,960
Speaker 3: that probably someone would stunt me if they're listening to this,

565
00:27:28,119 --> 00:27:30,840
Speaker 3: But I don't think there's much that I couldn't do

566
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:32,280
Speaker 3: that I wouldn't.

567
00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:34,959
Speaker 2: Try challenge, except.

568
00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:36,520
Speaker 3: Someone's like murder someone. I'm like, I don't want to.

569
00:27:39,160 --> 00:27:41,080
Speaker 1: Just to see what would happen, Like, how would you

570
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:44,440
Speaker 1: feel let's do a podcast about that. I hear true

571
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:46,800
Speaker 1: crime podcasts are going really well on the chat, like

572
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:48,240
Speaker 1: we can totally do one together.

573
00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:53,440
Speaker 3: Absolutely, I've always had that, and I just love experiencing things,

574
00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:57,439
Speaker 3: and I'm very philosophical with how I think, and I

575
00:27:57,440 --> 00:28:02,320
Speaker 3: truly believe that this is all quite meaningless, but at

576
00:28:02,359 --> 00:28:05,640
Speaker 3: the same time it's very meaningful. And I truly I'm

577
00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:08,840
Speaker 3: not religious. I honestly believe it's a bit of a

578
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:11,879
Speaker 3: miserable view, but I think that when we die, that's it,

579
00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:13,680
Speaker 3: and we've only got one sort of life and we

580
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:16,159
Speaker 3: just got to live in and experience it. And I

581
00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:19,240
Speaker 3: truly think that when we die, that's it. Nothing else happens.

582
00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:21,359
Speaker 3: And me and my dad were talking about this and

583
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:23,480
Speaker 3: he was like, then, why do you care about what

584
00:28:23,560 --> 00:28:25,840
Speaker 3: you do in this life. And it's like, because it

585
00:28:25,840 --> 00:28:28,040
Speaker 3: makes me feel good. It makes me feel good to

586
00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:30,879
Speaker 3: experience in things. It makes me feel good that we

587
00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:34,199
Speaker 3: have feelings, we have emotions, we have connection. That's a

588
00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:36,680
Speaker 3: beautiful thing and I love waking up and experiencing that.

589
00:28:36,720 --> 00:28:39,120
Speaker 3: But it still doesn't take away from my belief that

590
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:41,560
Speaker 3: I think this is all quite meaningless, and I think

591
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:43,840
Speaker 3: there's beauty and humbleness in that.

592
00:28:44,440 --> 00:28:46,680
Speaker 1: I feel like there's definitely another career for you in

593
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:51,920
Speaker 1: poetry and some kind of eloquent articulation, because actually I

594
00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:54,240
Speaker 1: did hear that you would ash with poetry, so I

595
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:57,200
Speaker 1: think you're already onto the poetry I did. You're very,

596
00:28:57,480 --> 00:29:01,600
Speaker 1: very articulate. It's also interesting coming back to that whole

597
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:06,280
Speaker 1: idea of masculinity and stereotypes. I had Bobby Holland Hanton,

598
00:29:06,320 --> 00:29:08,960
Speaker 1: who's been Chris hemsworth stunt double for the last ten

599
00:29:09,040 --> 00:29:10,920
Speaker 1: years on the show, who like, on the outside is

600
00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:15,239
Speaker 1: the epitome of masculinity and traditional like Braun and all

601
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:18,240
Speaker 1: those kinds of concepts. But his origins were in a

602
00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:22,040
Speaker 1: gymnastics career, and that you know, when he was younger

603
00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:24,880
Speaker 1: wasn't cool then it wasn't cool to and similar to ballet,

604
00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:27,640
Speaker 1: like men inlycrates, like not your typical thing that you

605
00:29:27,680 --> 00:29:30,720
Speaker 1: expect to see, and now that it's led him to

606
00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:32,800
Speaker 1: a career being thought it's considered cool.

607
00:29:32,840 --> 00:29:33,680
Speaker 2: Back then it wasn't.

608
00:29:33,760 --> 00:29:35,840
Speaker 1: And I think when you do things a little bit

609
00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:37,720
Speaker 1: differently or a little bit against the grain, you do

610
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:40,320
Speaker 1: face a lot of bullying or teasing or just people

611
00:29:40,360 --> 00:29:44,360
Speaker 1: misunderstanding you. But you seem to have always been quite

612
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:47,479
Speaker 1: comfortable to, like you said, try different things, even if

613
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:51,040
Speaker 1: they're not what normal dudes your age are doing. How

614
00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:55,160
Speaker 1: did you face like, for example, when you started doing ballet,

615
00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 1: I actually was with the Australian Ballet in a past life,

616
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 1: so I was very very out to watch the video

617
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:02,800
Speaker 1: footage if you're doing Clia's at the bar. It made

618
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:05,640
Speaker 1: me so happy. But I've been flying the flag for

619
00:30:05,760 --> 00:30:07,960
Speaker 1: years that like, no one has a better physique and

620
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:12,760
Speaker 1: longer endurance and muscle strength than ballerinas. But there's still

621
00:30:12,760 --> 00:30:15,760
Speaker 1: that sort of like preconception that it's for girls only.

622
00:30:15,840 --> 00:30:19,280
Speaker 2: So when you do do something new, do you face criticism?

623
00:30:19,480 --> 00:30:20,520
Speaker 2: How do you deal with that?

624
00:30:20,600 --> 00:30:22,080
Speaker 1: How do you push through and just be like, look,

625
00:30:22,120 --> 00:30:24,560
Speaker 1: I'm curious about it. I'm not threatened in my masculinity

626
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:27,080
Speaker 1: about it, Like, how can you encourage younger boys to

627
00:30:27,120 --> 00:30:31,840
Speaker 1: not be so conditioned by what traditional masculinity looks like.

628
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:34,680
Speaker 3: That's a really good question, because I must submit through

629
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,800
Speaker 3: through most of my high school years, Like I would

630
00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 3: try some of this stuff outside of school, or I

631
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,160
Speaker 3: would do things outside of school where no one was

632
00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:44,840
Speaker 3: really watching or no one really knew what I was doing.

633
00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:47,640
Speaker 3: I would I would think, I would ponder, I would

634
00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:51,760
Speaker 3: climb trees, but at school, I wouldn't. I wouldn't. I wouldn't.

635
00:30:51,760 --> 00:30:52,960
Speaker 3: I would go to school, and I was part of

636
00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:55,280
Speaker 3: the cool group. I was always part of the cool group.

637
00:30:55,320 --> 00:30:58,240
Speaker 3: And there's something about when you're young, you don't want

638
00:30:58,240 --> 00:31:00,000
Speaker 3: to feel like you're not a part of the tribe.

639
00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:01,760
Speaker 3: You want to feel like it. You want to feel

640
00:31:01,760 --> 00:31:03,080
Speaker 3: like you're part of the community. You don't want to

641
00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:06,040
Speaker 3: be the outcast is the worst feeling. I was pretty

642
00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:08,280
Speaker 3: scared to show my true authentic colors when I was

643
00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:10,520
Speaker 3: in high school. I must have met. Even after Reach,

644
00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:14,120
Speaker 3: I slowly but surely started to unpack a little bit

645
00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:16,400
Speaker 3: more and started to have a bit more confidence to

646
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:19,640
Speaker 3: show my mates. It was more so after high school though,

647
00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:23,480
Speaker 3: where I started to you would just be like, like, honestly,

648
00:31:24,320 --> 00:31:27,040
Speaker 3: what does it matter if someone doesn't like what I

649
00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:29,760
Speaker 3: do with my life. It's almost like a like, I

650
00:31:29,760 --> 00:31:31,440
Speaker 3: don't like to criticize people. It's a bit of a

651
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:33,920
Speaker 3: projection of their own stuff. And it's like, as long

652
00:31:33,920 --> 00:31:37,240
Speaker 3: as I'm not hurting anyone else, like me wearing a skirt,

653
00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:40,360
Speaker 3: some of the backlash that I got from that, me

654
00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:42,640
Speaker 3: doing ballet, some of the comments I get from that,

655
00:31:42,680 --> 00:31:44,880
Speaker 3: And it's just like, why do you care so much

656
00:31:44,880 --> 00:31:47,400
Speaker 3: about what I do in my life? And it's I'm

657
00:31:47,520 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 3: having fun. I'm not hurting anyone. I just don't understand that,

658
00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:53,960
Speaker 3: and it's sad. I actually I feel for them, I

659
00:31:54,000 --> 00:31:57,480
Speaker 3: genuinely do, because maybe they feel like they wish they

660
00:31:57,520 --> 00:32:00,440
Speaker 3: had the chance to experience with every they are and

661
00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:02,680
Speaker 3: I actually feel for them because I have the confidence

662
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:05,000
Speaker 3: to do that, and I wish they had it too,

663
00:32:05,080 --> 00:32:08,560
Speaker 3: because they would feel amazing if they could just really

664
00:32:08,640 --> 00:32:11,040
Speaker 3: and whether it be ballet or wearing a skirt, whatever

665
00:32:11,040 --> 00:32:14,800
Speaker 3: it is, if they could just experience some things that

666
00:32:14,840 --> 00:32:17,760
Speaker 3: they really want to do without the fear of judgment,

667
00:32:18,000 --> 00:32:19,200
Speaker 3: they would feel so much better.

668
00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:20,680
Speaker 2: I believe totally.

669
00:32:20,720 --> 00:32:22,920
Speaker 1: It's interesting you said that that, like without the fear

670
00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:25,120
Speaker 1: of judgment. I often say to people in like a

671
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:27,760
Speaker 1: career context, or trying something new, or starting a business

672
00:32:27,840 --> 00:32:30,560
Speaker 1: or learning a new skill, whatever it is, when we're

673
00:32:30,560 --> 00:32:32,440
Speaker 1: talking about the idea of fear of failure, I'm like,

674
00:32:32,480 --> 00:32:34,200
Speaker 1: what if you knew you could fail, Like, you could

675
00:32:34,200 --> 00:32:35,840
Speaker 1: try something, you wouldn't be good at it, and you'd fail,

676
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:37,400
Speaker 1: but no one would ever know about it?

677
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:38,800
Speaker 2: Would you be scared anymore?

678
00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:41,480
Speaker 1: And most of the time they're like no, So I'm like,

679
00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:43,920
Speaker 1: you're not scared of failing. You don't think that if

680
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:45,800
Speaker 1: you failed you'd be a worse person. You're scared of

681
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:48,840
Speaker 1: people knowing that you failed. You're scared of looking silly,

682
00:32:49,240 --> 00:32:52,600
Speaker 1: not feeling silly, looking silly, which means it's like such

683
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:55,560
Speaker 1: a useless fear, Like it's not related to anything. It's

684
00:32:55,560 --> 00:32:58,280
Speaker 1: this intangible thing about people's opinions that you don't care

685
00:32:58,280 --> 00:33:01,240
Speaker 1: about anyway, And it's so liberating when you let go

686
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:01,600
Speaker 1: of that.

687
00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 3: So I could not agree more. And I was thinking

688
00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:06,240
Speaker 3: about this the other day. I was actually said this

689
00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:08,600
Speaker 3: to my partner. I was saying, like, I'm a little

690
00:33:08,600 --> 00:33:11,520
Speaker 3: bit concerned, and I'm very optimistic. I must've been. I'm

691
00:33:11,680 --> 00:33:14,680
Speaker 3: very much glass half full type guy. But there is,

692
00:33:14,720 --> 00:33:17,280
Speaker 3: of course I think pretty full on about the world.

693
00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:20,600
Speaker 3: And I think right now, I think we think we're

694
00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:24,959
Speaker 3: teaching young people almost narcissistic tendencies in the sense of

695
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:29,400
Speaker 3: like it's very much I I deserve my happiness. I

696
00:33:30,120 --> 00:33:35,440
Speaker 3: want to feel instant gratification. It's and I think human history,

697
00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:37,880
Speaker 3: the reason as to why we are where we are

698
00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:41,040
Speaker 3: is because we all worked collectively most of the time.

699
00:33:41,480 --> 00:33:44,760
Speaker 3: And I think and I think we've got to slowly

700
00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:46,960
Speaker 3: teach young people that it's actually really important to be

701
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,560
Speaker 3: part of society and be kind to people and treat

702
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:52,640
Speaker 3: people with respect and help your neighbor out and some

703
00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:54,960
Speaker 3: things that I feel like we're kind of losing because

704
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:57,960
Speaker 3: everyone's kind of at war on these social media platforms

705
00:33:57,960 --> 00:34:01,000
Speaker 3: and it's like, I just don't know. Like, as I said,

706
00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:04,080
Speaker 3: I'm quite optimistic about the future, but at the same time,

707
00:34:04,200 --> 00:34:06,760
Speaker 3: just a little bit concerned about young people not learning

708
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:11,080
Speaker 3: valuable things around community and connection. And yeah, that's just

709
00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:12,920
Speaker 3: a little that was a bit off topic.

710
00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:17,240
Speaker 2: But no, I totally agree with you. I talk about

711
00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:18,040
Speaker 2: it all the time.

712
00:34:18,080 --> 00:34:21,680
Speaker 1: And I think having had ballet as a real grounding community,

713
00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:25,880
Speaker 1: like I think the role that religion once played in community,

714
00:34:26,040 --> 00:34:31,279
Speaker 1: or that like ethnicities, certain celebrations around ethnicities played. We're

715
00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:33,760
Speaker 1: losing that connection because you know, the role of religion

716
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:35,880
Speaker 1: and the role of things like that are fading slowly

717
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:37,960
Speaker 1: in this day and age, but we're not replacing them

718
00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:41,359
Speaker 1: with anything, which is I think why kids who do

719
00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:44,839
Speaker 1: a sport, team, sport, or individual, but who are part

720
00:34:44,920 --> 00:34:48,240
Speaker 1: of something, it gives them a belonging that like grounds

721
00:34:48,280 --> 00:34:50,120
Speaker 1: them through their younger years. And I think the kids

722
00:34:50,120 --> 00:34:52,560
Speaker 1: who don't have that, and also don't have a religion

723
00:34:52,640 --> 00:34:55,319
Speaker 1: or any kind of like connection to something, that's where

724
00:34:55,320 --> 00:34:55,880
Speaker 1: you start.

725
00:34:55,680 --> 00:34:56,440
Speaker 2: To get really lost.

726
00:34:56,480 --> 00:34:58,520
Speaker 1: It's so hard to find your identity because there's not

727
00:34:58,960 --> 00:35:02,920
Speaker 1: a consistence, safe, grounded place. And I think that's why,

728
00:35:03,560 --> 00:35:06,680
Speaker 1: like whatever sport or whatever activity it is, whether it's

729
00:35:06,760 --> 00:35:09,800
Speaker 1: music or whatever, I want my kids to do some

730
00:35:09,920 --> 00:35:12,880
Speaker 1: kind of thing that gives them a community, because that

731
00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:15,400
Speaker 1: gives you the safety to like figure out who you

732
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:17,799
Speaker 1: are even if you don't keep doing that sport, and

733
00:35:17,880 --> 00:35:19,840
Speaker 1: you know later in your life, it gives you discipline,

734
00:35:19,880 --> 00:35:23,160
Speaker 1: it gives you like belonging, working with others, learning about

735
00:35:23,680 --> 00:35:26,200
Speaker 1: managing yourself, time management, all of those things that you

736
00:35:26,239 --> 00:35:28,840
Speaker 1: get from whether it's sport or music or just just

737
00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:29,640
Speaker 1: having a hobby.

738
00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:32,560
Speaker 3: Yeah. One of my biggest role models is Da Khana.

739
00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:36,000
Speaker 3: I truly love everything she's about. She's a Muslim journalist

740
00:35:36,160 --> 00:35:39,280
Speaker 3: and she spent time on the front lines with white

741
00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:42,840
Speaker 3: supremacists and then in another series to Hardest and she

742
00:35:42,960 --> 00:35:45,319
Speaker 3: says the biggest seeing the reason we all think that

743
00:35:45,360 --> 00:35:48,239
Speaker 3: they're really bad people, and she articulates it very well

744
00:35:48,239 --> 00:35:50,600
Speaker 3: and I highly recommend people looking her up d Ya Khan,

745
00:35:51,320 --> 00:35:54,000
Speaker 3: But she articulates it. The reasons to why those people,

746
00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:58,400
Speaker 3: they're usually young young men, usually join these things is

747
00:35:58,440 --> 00:36:02,440
Speaker 3: because of love. Because they want connection, They want someone

748
00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:05,880
Speaker 3: to care about them. And it's like she says, if

749
00:36:05,920 --> 00:36:08,799
Speaker 3: we can create systems that are more positive, where they

750
00:36:09,080 --> 00:36:13,600
Speaker 3: feel accepted, feel heard, feel cared about, they wouldn't need

751
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:17,399
Speaker 3: to go to these extreme organizations that are pretty full

752
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:19,920
Speaker 3: of you mean, they would have something And it's just like,

753
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:23,680
Speaker 3: that's why I think, like community youth centers, the larn

754
00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:25,840
Speaker 3: Our Youth Club that I grew up in, they're so

755
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:27,800
Speaker 3: valuable and so important.

756
00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:30,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree, and that was a big part of

757
00:36:30,080 --> 00:36:32,239
Speaker 1: the discussions for Men's Health Week, but around mental health

758
00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 1: in particular, was starting from really young age, but getting

759
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:38,560
Speaker 1: boys connected in with something, some kind of purpose or

760
00:36:38,560 --> 00:36:42,080
Speaker 1: something to keep them safe and to keep them feeling

761
00:36:42,080 --> 00:36:44,080
Speaker 1: like they belong it. It's all like the key what

762
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,799
Speaker 1: are they the five key basic human needs, and one

763
00:36:46,800 --> 00:36:48,880
Speaker 1: of them is belonging. You need to feel like you

764
00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:51,920
Speaker 1: belong to something, otherwise everything else does to fall out

765
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:54,560
Speaker 1: of place. And I think you've become such an amazing

766
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:57,040
Speaker 1: role model for that, not just belonging, but belonging, not

767
00:36:57,280 --> 00:37:00,480
Speaker 1: just by emulating what everyone else is doing. Like you're plumber.

768
00:37:00,920 --> 00:37:03,879
Speaker 1: You know, you're a boxer. In many ways, you tick

769
00:37:03,920 --> 00:37:05,480
Speaker 1: a lot of boxes that make it easy for you

770
00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:06,000
Speaker 1: to fit in.

771
00:37:06,080 --> 00:37:06,840
Speaker 2: But I love that.

772
00:37:06,920 --> 00:37:08,719
Speaker 1: Also you're like, yeah, but fuck it, I'm going to

773
00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:11,640
Speaker 1: do ballet, I'm gonna wear naw polish, I'm gonna wear skirts.

774
00:37:11,640 --> 00:37:14,480
Speaker 1: Like that confuses a lot of people because you're like,

775
00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:17,920
Speaker 1: on one side of you the typical male, and then

776
00:37:17,960 --> 00:37:20,040
Speaker 1: on the other side you're like, but but nah, Like

777
00:37:20,080 --> 00:37:23,320
Speaker 1: I'm just going to do these these other incongruent things.

778
00:37:23,360 --> 00:37:25,839
Speaker 1: But that's why I think it's really powerful, because you're

779
00:37:25,840 --> 00:37:27,560
Speaker 1: not one or the other. You know, if you were

780
00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:30,000
Speaker 1: just doing the nail polish and skirts, it would make

781
00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:32,040
Speaker 1: it easy for a lot of men to switch off

782
00:37:32,040 --> 00:37:33,719
Speaker 1: to you because they'd be like, oh, well, he's not

783
00:37:33,920 --> 00:37:37,120
Speaker 1: like me. But because you can also be the blokey bloke,

784
00:37:37,320 --> 00:37:39,920
Speaker 1: You've got this like power to just be like, yeah,

785
00:37:39,960 --> 00:37:41,719
Speaker 1: I can have both, and I'm comfortable with that.

786
00:37:42,239 --> 00:37:44,600
Speaker 2: It's amazing and I look Alie.

787
00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:46,920
Speaker 3: Generally. The more that I talk to people, the more

788
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:49,480
Speaker 3: that I understand that. I think most humans, if not all,

789
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:53,359
Speaker 3: I like that too. We're kind of walking contradictions and

790
00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:56,120
Speaker 3: we love it. We love things but then also love

791
00:37:56,200 --> 00:38:00,239
Speaker 3: something that is the polar opposite, and that's okay, you

792
00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:03,080
Speaker 3: don't have to. And I understand. I've thought about it.

793
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:06,080
Speaker 3: Why I think human stereotype or why we generalize, and

794
00:38:06,120 --> 00:38:08,920
Speaker 3: I think it's to save energy. It's to conserve energy.

795
00:38:08,920 --> 00:38:11,280
Speaker 3: It makes it easier in our brain to decipher, Okay,

796
00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:14,160
Speaker 3: this person does this, Okay, they're going to most likely

797
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:16,440
Speaker 3: be like that. And I understand that we do that

798
00:38:16,480 --> 00:38:18,799
Speaker 3: and understand why we do it. But it's like, I

799
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:22,640
Speaker 3: truly believe that if you just let everyone live freely

800
00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:27,080
Speaker 3: and everyone live without social construction, Like, the world would

801
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:29,759
Speaker 3: be some crazy place. People will be doing the most

802
00:38:29,800 --> 00:38:32,560
Speaker 3: weird and wonderful things, and I think that would be

803
00:38:32,560 --> 00:38:33,400
Speaker 3: beautiful to watch.

804
00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:37,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my gosh, you have one of those brains

805
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:38,720
Speaker 1: that I just want to create. You're like my favorite

806
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:42,600
Speaker 1: kind of guess. Your brain is just so oh interesting,

807
00:38:42,800 --> 00:38:44,600
Speaker 1: Like I just want to crawl in there and look

808
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:48,400
Speaker 1: think about all the ways you're thinking. You know, it's fascinating.

809
00:38:48,400 --> 00:38:50,000
Speaker 1: And I think in a very similar way, I'm like,

810
00:38:50,360 --> 00:38:52,200
Speaker 1: I truly think that the more different things you try,

811
00:38:52,239 --> 00:38:53,879
Speaker 1: whether you're crap at them or not, like who cares,

812
00:38:53,880 --> 00:38:55,759
Speaker 1: you don't have to win it everything. The more things

813
00:38:55,760 --> 00:38:57,680
Speaker 1: you try, every time you try something new, you find

814
00:38:57,719 --> 00:38:59,880
Speaker 1: a new piece of your personality. Like, even if it's

815
00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:02,080
Speaker 1: a piece, it's like, I actually don't like that activity,

816
00:39:02,120 --> 00:39:05,840
Speaker 1: that's a new piece. And like, the most open minded,

817
00:39:06,440 --> 00:39:09,520
Speaker 1: broadly skilled and interesting people are the people who've tried

818
00:39:09,520 --> 00:39:12,400
Speaker 1: lots of random shit and kept going with some of

819
00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:15,120
Speaker 1: it and haven't with other things. But you're just such

820
00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:17,160
Speaker 1: a fascinating human. But I also love that at the

821
00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:20,440
Speaker 1: same time, you've been able to have this honed in

822
00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:24,279
Speaker 1: focus on now coming back for Paris, twenty twenty four.

823
00:39:24,480 --> 00:39:29,400
Speaker 1: So back to boxing. Amidst all this reflection, how are

824
00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:32,080
Speaker 1: you training? Do you box every day? Like how do

825
00:39:32,120 --> 00:39:36,239
Speaker 1: you your poor body must just feel thrashed all the time.

826
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:39,200
Speaker 1: And where does the ballet fit in? Like, you know,

827
00:39:39,680 --> 00:39:40,600
Speaker 1: how are you preparing?

828
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:43,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, boxing takes up a lot of my time. It's

829
00:39:43,160 --> 00:39:45,319
Speaker 3: saying that though I trained twice a day, it sounds

830
00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:46,640
Speaker 3: like a lot. There's a lot of free time to

831
00:39:46,760 --> 00:39:50,000
Speaker 3: just wrap with cover, listen to podcasts, to do my

832
00:39:50,080 --> 00:39:52,560
Speaker 3: own sort of stuff. I like to do ballet once

833
00:39:52,600 --> 00:39:54,799
Speaker 3: a week. I do travel a lot, so sometimes I'm

834
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:56,080
Speaker 3: not able to do it once a week, but it's

835
00:39:56,160 --> 00:39:58,480
Speaker 3: usually once a week. And I'm just the time peer

836
00:39:58,480 --> 00:39:59,680
Speaker 3: because I've got a lot of free time. I've got

837
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:02,840
Speaker 3: a lot of time to think and I really enjoy.

838
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:04,239
Speaker 2: That ponder in a tree.

839
00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:09,360
Speaker 3: Someone said this to me, it's called mental masturbation, and

840
00:40:09,400 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 3: I think that that's I think that's what I do.

841
00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:17,319
Speaker 3: I'm like, that is such a good point. So I

842
00:40:17,400 --> 00:40:18,960
Speaker 3: constantly do something that.

843
00:40:21,200 --> 00:40:22,840
Speaker 2: I love it amazing.

844
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:26,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, a lot of my time, Like I must admit,

845
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:30,000
Speaker 3: it's like it's dedicated to a goal, and I must

846
00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:32,080
Speaker 3: admit I feel a little bit lost if I don't

847
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:34,040
Speaker 3: have a bit of a direction and I'm going in

848
00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:36,920
Speaker 3: like I do understand that after a fight there is

849
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:39,520
Speaker 3: one or two weeks we need to relax, recover, not

850
00:40:39,560 --> 00:40:42,920
Speaker 3: have anything insight. Did that lasts for more than a month,

851
00:40:43,280 --> 00:40:47,720
Speaker 3: I'm losing my I noticed my mental clarity and mental

852
00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:50,960
Speaker 3: stability starts to sort of like falter, and I really

853
00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:55,520
Speaker 3: need focused direction. I'm very aware of my personality and

854
00:40:55,560 --> 00:40:59,399
Speaker 3: it's very extreme. So there's all these positive things that yes,

855
00:40:59,440 --> 00:41:01,520
Speaker 3: we're talking about right now, and I am all for this,

856
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:06,960
Speaker 3: and I am also messy, dark, got trauma, as we

857
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,359
Speaker 3: all do, some things that I'm navigating some things I'm

858
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:14,080
Speaker 3: not proud of, and just understanding that if I don't

859
00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:17,120
Speaker 3: have direction, if I don't have focus, it could go

860
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:19,759
Speaker 3: in a really bad direction. So I'm very aware of

861
00:41:19,800 --> 00:41:21,520
Speaker 3: that and I have been for a very long time.

862
00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:24,799
Speaker 1: I think that's something that's also really great about you,

863
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:26,840
Speaker 1: is that, I mean, to the extent that you're comfortable

864
00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:28,360
Speaker 1: to talk about it. There's a part of this podcast

865
00:41:28,400 --> 00:41:30,399
Speaker 1: it's all about that, the n ATA, all the things

866
00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:32,040
Speaker 1: that get in the way of your joy. Because there's

867
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:34,920
Speaker 1: so much of that conversation that never makes it to

868
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:37,200
Speaker 1: the surface because it's so much like the Olympics and

869
00:41:37,239 --> 00:41:39,279
Speaker 1: how you going, how are you training? And mindset and

870
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:43,120
Speaker 1: ballet and you know, so many headlines are the ballet

871
00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:47,000
Speaker 1: dancing plumber becomes a boxing Olympian, which is amazing. I mean,

872
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:49,080
Speaker 1: it's so wonderful, But I'm sure there's so much shit

873
00:41:49,120 --> 00:41:52,799
Speaker 1: that you would want other people trying to emulate what

874
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:56,120
Speaker 1: you're doing to understand that it's not all positives, it's

875
00:41:56,160 --> 00:41:58,120
Speaker 1: not all those headlines. You know, there's a lot of

876
00:41:58,120 --> 00:42:00,160
Speaker 1: stuff that goes on behind the scenes to get you here.

877
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:03,520
Speaker 1: So whatever you're comfortable talking about, what are some of

878
00:42:03,560 --> 00:42:06,360
Speaker 1: the big things that challenge you? And I think a

879
00:42:06,480 --> 00:42:10,840
Speaker 1: really active mind does open you up to such deep pondering.

880
00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:14,120
Speaker 1: But also like our brains are dark places because the

881
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:16,920
Speaker 1: spectrum is broader, I think, which means the highers are higher,

882
00:42:16,920 --> 00:42:18,480
Speaker 1: but the lowers can be lower as well.

883
00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:22,839
Speaker 3: Yeah. Absolutely, It's something that I realized pretty early on

884
00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:27,360
Speaker 3: before I started boxing, that my brain was quite unique

885
00:42:27,640 --> 00:42:31,239
Speaker 3: and full on and active, we'll just say active and

886
00:42:31,800 --> 00:42:41,560
Speaker 3: boxing busy, always on. No, when I started boxing, I

887
00:42:41,640 --> 00:42:43,839
Speaker 3: was pretty tired. I was pretty exhausted, and that's what

888
00:42:43,880 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 3: physical exercise has always given me. It's given me space

889
00:42:47,080 --> 00:42:49,439
Speaker 3: and my thoughts and not be as loud. It's given

890
00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:51,080
Speaker 3: me time for me to be a little bit more

891
00:42:51,120 --> 00:42:53,440
Speaker 3: tired and me to have a good sleep. And I

892
00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:56,080
Speaker 3: noticed when I'm not training that my thoughts are a

893
00:42:56,080 --> 00:42:58,400
Speaker 3: little bit wilder and it's a little bit less to control.

894
00:42:59,200 --> 00:43:01,600
Speaker 3: But with the dark things inside of me. It's like

895
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:05,920
Speaker 3: I truly believe that most, if not all, successful people,

896
00:43:06,760 --> 00:43:09,480
Speaker 3: they've all got something that's driving them, and whether that

897
00:43:09,560 --> 00:43:12,359
Speaker 3: be something that happened when they were really young, whether

898
00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:15,040
Speaker 3: that be generational, whether that be something someone said to

899
00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:17,960
Speaker 3: them in their teenage years, whatever it is. For me,

900
00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:23,480
Speaker 3: I always felt mine was. People often criticize me and

901
00:43:23,480 --> 00:43:27,000
Speaker 3: criticize my family, and a lot of I'll be completely honest,

902
00:43:27,040 --> 00:43:28,920
Speaker 3: a lot of what I do is out of spite.

903
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:31,799
Speaker 3: A lot of what I do is to sick the

904
00:43:31,840 --> 00:43:33,840
Speaker 3: middle finger up to the people who didn't believe in

905
00:43:33,880 --> 00:43:36,320
Speaker 3: me and believe in my family. And that's a nasty

906
00:43:36,360 --> 00:43:38,719
Speaker 3: place to be as well, because it's like, am I

907
00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:40,759
Speaker 3: doing it because I love the sport, or am I

908
00:43:40,840 --> 00:43:43,960
Speaker 3: doing it to make my family proud? And telling those

909
00:43:43,960 --> 00:43:46,840
Speaker 3: people to f off who criticize my family, and I

910
00:43:46,880 --> 00:43:51,760
Speaker 3: do think about that sometimes also, like I've been battling

911
00:43:51,760 --> 00:43:55,680
Speaker 3: addiction for my whole life, and I'm just I'm fortunate

912
00:43:55,760 --> 00:44:00,239
Speaker 3: that my addiction is socially accepted. It causes just as

913
00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:04,840
Speaker 3: much pain as what other addiction does. It's just socially

914
00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:07,120
Speaker 3: accepted and people celebrate you for it, so it's different

915
00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:10,000
Speaker 3: and you don't get as much help. So I'm fortunate

916
00:44:10,080 --> 00:44:12,319
Speaker 3: that I'm aware of it, and I'm conscious of it,

917
00:44:12,360 --> 00:44:15,000
Speaker 3: and I know that if I wasn't doing boxing or

918
00:44:15,040 --> 00:44:18,120
Speaker 3: something else, it could be something negative. There's almost been

919
00:44:18,120 --> 00:44:20,120
Speaker 3: like a bit of a balance in my head of

920
00:44:20,160 --> 00:44:26,319
Speaker 3: like success boxing, focus on that addiction, and there's also

921
00:44:26,440 --> 00:44:29,160
Speaker 3: always been something else here to sort of balance it out,

922
00:44:29,280 --> 00:44:33,080
Speaker 3: something more dark and gloomy, and whether that be substance

923
00:44:33,160 --> 00:44:38,200
Speaker 3: use when I was younger, whether that be other things, validation, gambling.

924
00:44:38,239 --> 00:44:41,400
Speaker 3: At some point, there's always been something else there balancing

925
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:44,800
Speaker 3: me out, and I've just watched, like the more conscious

926
00:44:44,840 --> 00:44:46,879
Speaker 3: I've become, it's like I will be like, no, I'm

927
00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:50,040
Speaker 3: not going to gamble, and then another addiction will come up,

928
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:53,680
Speaker 3: something to balance it out, Yeah, and I won't notice

929
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:55,920
Speaker 3: it straight away, but then I'll be like, wait, I'll

930
00:44:55,960 --> 00:44:58,359
Speaker 3: be spending more time on social media, I'll be posting more,

931
00:44:58,440 --> 00:45:01,080
Speaker 3: I'll be caring about the how many likes I'm getting.

932
00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:03,600
Speaker 3: Or as I said, when I was younger, there was substance,

933
00:45:03,640 --> 00:45:06,799
Speaker 3: and there's just many things that I notice to sort

934
00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:11,919
Speaker 3: of counterbalance the success and ambition, addiction and obsession. There's

935
00:45:11,960 --> 00:45:14,160
Speaker 3: a like the dark area that like no one really

936
00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:16,719
Speaker 3: talks about it, and it's something that I'm trying to

937
00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:20,319
Speaker 3: navigate because I don't want to finish sport, especially when

938
00:45:20,360 --> 00:45:24,080
Speaker 3: I have kids, and be lost and be messy and

939
00:45:24,160 --> 00:45:27,000
Speaker 3: not have control of it. And that's why I'm grateful

940
00:45:27,000 --> 00:45:29,200
Speaker 3: that I'm navigating it now at twenty four and not

941
00:45:29,239 --> 00:45:30,040
Speaker 3: at thirty five.

942
00:45:30,760 --> 00:45:34,160
Speaker 1: I mean, it's incredible that you are self aware enough

943
00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:37,799
Speaker 1: to even identify your own patterns at such a young age.

944
00:45:37,840 --> 00:45:39,840
Speaker 1: Like twenty four year old me was like, I don't

945
00:45:39,880 --> 00:45:42,759
Speaker 1: even like such a mess and just like I would

946
00:45:42,840 --> 00:45:44,959
Speaker 1: run away from my thoughts. I wouldn't sit with them

947
00:45:45,360 --> 00:45:47,680
Speaker 1: like I can now and work through them so they're

948
00:45:47,680 --> 00:45:49,880
Speaker 1: not don't become toxic. I would run as fast as

949
00:45:49,880 --> 00:45:51,520
Speaker 1: I could and then just be burnt out all the time.

950
00:45:51,840 --> 00:45:55,120
Speaker 1: It's fascinating that you're able to do it now, like

951
00:45:55,200 --> 00:45:58,359
Speaker 1: at twenty four, it's amazing. So I mean, good on

952
00:45:58,400 --> 00:46:02,560
Speaker 1: you for even being able to identify addictive behaviors let

953
00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:05,359
Speaker 1: alone go and get help for them. How do you

954
00:46:05,440 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 1: kind of interrupt those cycles? Do you see help? You know,

955
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:12,319
Speaker 1: external help? Do you just deal with it internally? Like

956
00:46:12,880 --> 00:46:15,440
Speaker 1: how do you try and interrupt those cycles or just

957
00:46:15,520 --> 00:46:18,239
Speaker 1: you know, make sure that you're you're keeping on top

958
00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:19,640
Speaker 1: of yourself, if that makes sense.

959
00:46:19,760 --> 00:46:23,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's a mixture of internal and external help.

960
00:46:23,239 --> 00:46:27,280
Speaker 3: So internal I'm very self conscious, and you don't always

961
00:46:27,360 --> 00:46:31,760
Speaker 3: win the battle with yourself. But the feeling of like

962
00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:34,520
Speaker 3: like I said to my partner, like I wouldn't gamble

963
00:46:34,600 --> 00:46:36,359
Speaker 3: for a certain amount of time and I haven't done it,

964
00:46:36,400 --> 00:46:38,280
Speaker 3: and it's like that's a good feeling, and it doesn't

965
00:46:38,320 --> 00:46:41,160
Speaker 3: always work, Like you can say something to yourself but

966
00:46:41,200 --> 00:46:43,160
Speaker 3: I'm not going to do it, and then you're in

967
00:46:43,239 --> 00:46:45,480
Speaker 3: you go and do it, and it's like, I think

968
00:46:45,480 --> 00:46:49,399
Speaker 3: it's more so that I just I crave feeling and

969
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:51,400
Speaker 3: this is a messy part of me and something that

970
00:46:51,400 --> 00:46:54,120
Speaker 3: I'm I don't understand what direction you go in, And

971
00:46:54,120 --> 00:46:58,400
Speaker 3: I'm in the sense of like a crave feeling alive

972
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:03,400
Speaker 3: and often and boxing makes me feel alive. Extreme things

973
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:06,200
Speaker 3: make me feel alive. And the more that you go

974
00:47:06,280 --> 00:47:09,160
Speaker 3: to the Olympics, the more you do massive things in

975
00:47:09,200 --> 00:47:12,560
Speaker 3: your sport, that's probably one of the most alive feelings

976
00:47:12,560 --> 00:47:16,080
Speaker 3: you can feel. And it's like life kind of feels

977
00:47:16,280 --> 00:47:18,680
Speaker 3: a little bit boring, and I think as well, drug

978
00:47:18,800 --> 00:47:21,560
Speaker 3: use does that. It's like you're experiencing this world with

979
00:47:21,680 --> 00:47:25,080
Speaker 3: substance and feeling and emotion, and then also you come

980
00:47:25,120 --> 00:47:27,840
Speaker 3: back to normal and it's like life isn't as bright.

981
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:30,759
Speaker 3: That makes sense, and it's weird. It's very strange. And

982
00:47:30,800 --> 00:47:33,960
Speaker 3: I always notice I feel so much clearer and so

983
00:47:34,040 --> 00:47:37,240
Speaker 3: much better when I'm just I think it's more consistent.

984
00:47:37,280 --> 00:47:39,120
Speaker 3: It doesn't go as high and it doesn't go as low.

985
00:47:39,239 --> 00:47:42,720
Speaker 3: But when I'm not in an addiction, in an addictive state,

986
00:47:42,760 --> 00:47:45,480
Speaker 3: because the addiction will send you up high and then

987
00:47:45,480 --> 00:47:47,319
Speaker 3: it will also send you really low. When I'm not

988
00:47:47,400 --> 00:47:50,399
Speaker 3: in an addiction, I notice it's just more consistent. It's

989
00:47:50,400 --> 00:47:53,120
Speaker 3: all as high, but it's also not as low. And yeah,

990
00:47:53,160 --> 00:47:55,000
Speaker 3: but I think I'm grateful that I've got a lot

991
00:47:55,000 --> 00:47:57,520
Speaker 3: of people around me who are very aware of me.

992
00:47:57,760 --> 00:48:00,520
Speaker 3: My partner is so supportive of me, and that's probably

993
00:48:00,520 --> 00:48:02,680
Speaker 3: one of the areas where I've shoveled the most of

994
00:48:02,719 --> 00:48:05,440
Speaker 3: my life is a partner. And I'm just really grateful

995
00:48:05,440 --> 00:48:08,640
Speaker 3: that my partner is super patient and she's open to

996
00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:12,440
Speaker 3: however I show up, and she's willing and she's wanting

997
00:48:12,760 --> 00:48:15,480
Speaker 3: to grow with me. So yeah, I'm very grateful that

998
00:48:15,560 --> 00:48:16,960
Speaker 3: she entered my life about a year ago.

999
00:48:17,480 --> 00:48:18,879
Speaker 2: You would her with poetry of.

1000
00:48:23,120 --> 00:48:27,400
Speaker 1: I'm so incredibly grateful that you are willing to be

1001
00:48:27,480 --> 00:48:30,279
Speaker 1: so open about that side of yourself. Particularly, I think

1002
00:48:30,280 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 1: it's easier to talk about something when you're through it,

1003
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:33,920
Speaker 1: like when you're completely through the other end. So people

1004
00:48:33,920 --> 00:48:37,000
Speaker 1: often talk about burnout or addiction cycles when they're like, yeah,

1005
00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:38,799
Speaker 1: back ten years ago, but I've been fine since now.

1006
00:48:38,840 --> 00:48:40,600
Speaker 1: But in the throes of it, for you to actually

1007
00:48:41,200 --> 00:48:43,840
Speaker 1: share what it feels like and to explain those highs

1008
00:48:43,840 --> 00:48:46,280
Speaker 1: and lows, I think one of the reasons why people

1009
00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:48,680
Speaker 1: don't identify it earlier is because they don't hear anyone

1010
00:48:48,680 --> 00:48:51,000
Speaker 1: talk about it. They don't no one talks about this

1011
00:48:51,040 --> 00:48:53,919
Speaker 1: stuff because it's you know, there's shame, there's stigma, there's

1012
00:48:53,960 --> 00:48:56,040
Speaker 1: embarrassment or people just don't know how.

1013
00:48:56,040 --> 00:48:56,839
Speaker 2: To articulate it.

1014
00:48:56,880 --> 00:49:00,560
Speaker 1: So the fact that you're willing to explain is it

1015
00:49:00,719 --> 00:49:03,080
Speaker 1: just shines so much light on what others might be

1016
00:49:03,160 --> 00:49:06,319
Speaker 1: going through or for other partners whose partners are going

1017
00:49:06,360 --> 00:49:09,200
Speaker 1: through it. You know, the more that we have these conversations,

1018
00:49:09,239 --> 00:49:12,240
Speaker 1: I've never actually heard someone talk about a gambling addiction.

1019
00:49:12,360 --> 00:49:14,920
Speaker 1: I know it happens, I know it can be incredibly destructive,

1020
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:17,600
Speaker 1: but you know, if you haven't experienced that, it's so

1021
00:49:17,760 --> 00:49:20,239
Speaker 1: easy to just default to like just don't do it,

1022
00:49:20,640 --> 00:49:24,319
Speaker 1: like just don't spend your money, like as if it's

1023
00:49:24,360 --> 00:49:27,239
Speaker 1: not you know, a psychological cycle that you get in,

1024
00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:30,440
Speaker 1: Like it's not that simple. And I think you explaining

1025
00:49:30,520 --> 00:49:33,239
Speaker 1: the high and the hit that you get from that

1026
00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:37,560
Speaker 1: because everything else doesn't compare in that moment. That's that's

1027
00:49:37,719 --> 00:49:41,080
Speaker 1: enormously insightful and that and no one can imagine what

1028
00:49:41,080 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 1: it's like to go to the Olympics and then have

1029
00:49:42,680 --> 00:49:45,680
Speaker 1: to wait four years if you can go back at all,

1030
00:49:45,840 --> 00:49:48,439
Speaker 1: to get that same Like that's the pinnacle. If you've

1031
00:49:48,480 --> 00:49:50,719
Speaker 1: lived up there, how are you supposed to live for

1032
00:49:50,760 --> 00:49:52,920
Speaker 1: the four years in between before the next one? That

1033
00:49:53,040 --> 00:49:54,400
Speaker 1: no one really talks about.

1034
00:49:54,120 --> 00:49:57,239
Speaker 3: That No, that's yeah, that's the thing that it's like,

1035
00:49:57,600 --> 00:50:01,320
Speaker 3: I always think that I'll be super ambitious of striving

1036
00:50:01,360 --> 00:50:04,799
Speaker 3: for meeting connection extreme things. I understand that's part of

1037
00:50:04,800 --> 00:50:07,759
Speaker 3: my personality, but yeah, like I often feel like when

1038
00:50:07,800 --> 00:50:09,960
Speaker 3: I'm fifty, it's like, my body is not going to

1039
00:50:09,960 --> 00:50:12,960
Speaker 3: be like it is now at twenty four, Like how

1040
00:50:13,040 --> 00:50:15,360
Speaker 3: is it going to hold out? What's what's going to

1041
00:50:15,360 --> 00:50:17,000
Speaker 3: give me that rush, what's going to give me that thing,

1042
00:50:17,160 --> 00:50:19,080
Speaker 3: or what's going to make me feel alive? And it

1043
00:50:19,800 --> 00:50:22,400
Speaker 3: is something that is concerning. But as I said, I'm

1044
00:50:22,520 --> 00:50:25,799
Speaker 3: fortunate that I'm thinking about it now at twenty four

1045
00:50:25,840 --> 00:50:29,560
Speaker 3: and not at forty or when it's too late, so

1046
00:50:30,160 --> 00:50:31,680
Speaker 3: I mustn't be. I do put a lot of things

1047
00:50:31,719 --> 00:50:34,239
Speaker 3: in place, and I think it's from my dad. My

1048
00:50:34,320 --> 00:50:37,160
Speaker 3: dad's always thought about the future, and he's very much

1049
00:50:37,400 --> 00:50:39,719
Speaker 3: like living in the future and he's like, Okay, we've

1050
00:50:39,760 --> 00:50:42,760
Speaker 3: got to save enough money so I can't work forever.

1051
00:50:42,800 --> 00:50:45,000
Speaker 3: And it's very much like that, and I think he's

1052
00:50:45,040 --> 00:50:47,560
Speaker 3: instilled that in me as well. It's very much forward planning,

1053
00:50:48,040 --> 00:50:50,439
Speaker 3: almost too much, and it's like you're not actually really

1054
00:50:50,480 --> 00:50:52,319
Speaker 3: living in the moment. You're just like, hey, what's next.

1055
00:50:52,520 --> 00:50:56,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, again, that's that other area where it's like fine

1056
00:50:56,320 --> 00:50:59,799
Speaker 1: line between present and mindful, but also like you know,

1057
00:51:00,000 --> 00:51:02,000
Speaker 1: you need to have like a job tomorrow so you

1058
00:51:02,040 --> 00:51:02,399
Speaker 1: can eat.

1059
00:51:02,680 --> 00:51:03,560
Speaker 3: It's kind of important.

1060
00:51:05,239 --> 00:51:06,480
Speaker 2: But I think that's another thing.

1061
00:51:06,560 --> 00:51:10,360
Speaker 1: Like my husband had the same thing when he got injured,

1062
00:51:10,400 --> 00:51:12,200
Speaker 1: Like he did his acl like three times and he

1063
00:51:12,239 --> 00:51:14,840
Speaker 1: stopped running very abruptly, And there was so much sports

1064
00:51:14,840 --> 00:51:19,200
Speaker 1: psychology inside of the sport, but once you quit, there

1065
00:51:19,280 --> 00:51:21,759
Speaker 1: was nothing like and maybe it's I'm sure it's better now.

1066
00:51:21,760 --> 00:51:22,919
Speaker 2: This was like a decade ago.

1067
00:51:23,040 --> 00:51:26,640
Speaker 1: But he found that transition from a life where everything

1068
00:51:26,680 --> 00:51:29,759
Speaker 1: is about winning and like silver and bronze is a

1069
00:51:29,760 --> 00:51:33,080
Speaker 1: loss to like trying to translate into a life where

1070
00:51:33,600 --> 00:51:35,759
Speaker 1: there are no gold medals in life, like you just

1071
00:51:35,840 --> 00:51:38,200
Speaker 1: have you have a good, happy life and nothing has

1072
00:51:38,239 --> 00:51:40,040
Speaker 1: to be gold all the time, and you can still

1073
00:51:40,040 --> 00:51:42,719
Speaker 1: have a great life. Like we're not running a raise.

1074
00:51:42,800 --> 00:51:45,280
Speaker 1: We're all living different lives. And he found it really

1075
00:51:45,320 --> 00:51:48,960
Speaker 1: difficult to like to feel happy and to feel fulfilled

1076
00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:52,080
Speaker 1: because yeah, if he got anything that resembled a silver

1077
00:51:52,320 --> 00:51:54,560
Speaker 1: in like at the bakery or like you know, in

1078
00:51:54,600 --> 00:51:57,399
Speaker 1: normal life activities, he'd be like, my life's shit, I'm

1079
00:51:57,400 --> 00:52:01,000
Speaker 1: shit everything, shit, what's the point of life? And I

1080
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:03,560
Speaker 1: think it's amazing that you've got a career as well

1081
00:52:03,640 --> 00:52:08,520
Speaker 1: that isn't competitive. That's just like allows you to build

1082
00:52:08,560 --> 00:52:12,000
Speaker 1: skills and you know, build for a future, that allows

1083
00:52:12,040 --> 00:52:14,680
Speaker 1: you a break from that, like a type let's win

1084
00:52:15,160 --> 00:52:17,000
Speaker 1: kind of thing, like are you plumbing at the moment?

1085
00:52:17,040 --> 00:52:18,120
Speaker 1: Do you do it on the side and do you

1086
00:52:18,160 --> 00:52:21,520
Speaker 1: find that's a nice release from that kind of competitive nature?

1087
00:52:21,760 --> 00:52:25,120
Speaker 3: Yeah? Absolutely. I always just Peter Bowle, who was a

1088
00:52:25,520 --> 00:52:27,640
Speaker 3: meter runner at the Olympics, he said this one comment

1089
00:52:27,760 --> 00:52:30,120
Speaker 3: like we're all we're all just humid at the end

1090
00:52:30,120 --> 00:52:33,160
Speaker 3: of the day. And I truly think that, like, although

1091
00:52:33,200 --> 00:52:36,760
Speaker 3: of course absolutely I went to the Olympics for boxing,

1092
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:39,640
Speaker 3: but at the end of the day, like I'm just

1093
00:52:39,719 --> 00:52:41,960
Speaker 3: like my brother who's a plumber and every time I'm

1094
00:52:42,000 --> 00:52:44,560
Speaker 3: back in Melbourne, always give you a hand helping him out.

1095
00:52:44,600 --> 00:52:47,120
Speaker 3: And I'm pretty useless on the tools, but I try

1096
00:52:47,200 --> 00:52:52,920
Speaker 3: my best, and I think it's so important. I think

1097
00:52:52,960 --> 00:52:55,560
Speaker 3: it's really important to just like, I don't know, I

1098
00:52:55,600 --> 00:52:59,040
Speaker 3: never think that you're above someone. But then also at

1099
00:52:59,040 --> 00:53:01,120
Speaker 3: the same time, something that I'm trying to work on

1100
00:53:01,239 --> 00:53:03,520
Speaker 3: is I never think you're above someone, but then also

1101
00:53:03,640 --> 00:53:05,600
Speaker 3: looking at someone who you strive to be, like, never

1102
00:53:05,640 --> 00:53:06,759
Speaker 3: think that you can't be that.

1103
00:53:07,760 --> 00:53:09,960
Speaker 1: Actually you mentioned that at start, How are you going

1104
00:53:10,040 --> 00:53:12,640
Speaker 1: to do that differently in Paris? Like you mentioned you

1105
00:53:13,280 --> 00:53:16,600
Speaker 1: had lost before you even turned up last time? Is

1106
00:53:16,600 --> 00:53:19,120
Speaker 1: that because you'd psyched yourself out, like because you were like,

1107
00:53:19,160 --> 00:53:21,120
Speaker 1: I don't belong here or I am I'm not going to?

1108
00:53:21,239 --> 00:53:24,440
Speaker 1: Like what are you changing to turn up in Paris

1109
00:53:24,600 --> 00:53:25,319
Speaker 1: and not have that?

1110
00:53:25,600 --> 00:53:27,560
Speaker 3: So there's a few things I've been working on in

1111
00:53:27,600 --> 00:53:29,399
Speaker 3: this sense of life for so long. So I only

1112
00:53:29,400 --> 00:53:32,279
Speaker 3: found this out recently about myself. For so long, I

1113
00:53:32,360 --> 00:53:34,920
Speaker 3: kept saying on podcasts or every time I spoke at

1114
00:53:34,920 --> 00:53:37,799
Speaker 3: my story, it's like I just felt I wasn't good enough.

1115
00:53:38,400 --> 00:53:40,279
Speaker 3: And then I thought about this. I've seen my life

1116
00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:43,920
Speaker 3: coach through about six months, and we realized together that

1117
00:53:45,480 --> 00:53:48,319
Speaker 3: in the moments where at the age of twelve, when

1118
00:53:48,320 --> 00:53:51,600
Speaker 3: I lost my first fight, the reason why I went back,

1119
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:54,040
Speaker 3: it's because I truly believe that I could do it,

1120
00:53:54,320 --> 00:53:55,759
Speaker 3: or else I wouldn't have went back, or else I

1121
00:53:55,800 --> 00:53:58,680
Speaker 3: wouldn't even try it. And it's like, for so long

1122
00:53:58,719 --> 00:54:01,200
Speaker 3: I kept telling myself that maybe I'm not good enough,

1123
00:54:01,239 --> 00:54:04,799
Speaker 3: and it's like, no, you've started this, so obviously you

1124
00:54:04,880 --> 00:54:07,759
Speaker 3: believe that you are good enough, or obviously wouldn't have

1125
00:54:07,760 --> 00:54:10,480
Speaker 3: even tried so. And it's just like I'm just trying

1126
00:54:10,520 --> 00:54:13,640
Speaker 3: to change the tone of how I talk about myself,

1127
00:54:13,760 --> 00:54:16,960
Speaker 3: talk to myself. It's like even little things when I'm training.

1128
00:54:17,040 --> 00:54:19,879
Speaker 3: I'll be training, it's like, oh, like it does get

1129
00:54:19,920 --> 00:54:21,480
Speaker 3: me to new levels I've been training. I'm like, oh,

1130
00:54:21,520 --> 00:54:23,400
Speaker 3: that's not good enough, go up, go up higher in

1131
00:54:23,440 --> 00:54:25,520
Speaker 3: the treadmill, and you're like you're pushing, but it's like

1132
00:54:25,640 --> 00:54:28,359
Speaker 3: encouraging myself more. It's like, mate, that's awesome, right, let's

1133
00:54:28,360 --> 00:54:29,960
Speaker 3: go one more. Come on, you can do this. It's

1134
00:54:29,960 --> 00:54:32,879
Speaker 3: just like changing that tone. And I think that could

1135
00:54:32,960 --> 00:54:36,120
Speaker 3: unlock because I think a lot of my life has

1136
00:54:36,160 --> 00:54:38,799
Speaker 3: been lived in scarcity and fear, where I think in

1137
00:54:38,920 --> 00:54:43,000
Speaker 3: love and abundance, especially in those areas, it's only going

1138
00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:45,680
Speaker 3: to propel me forward. I believe so true.

1139
00:54:45,800 --> 00:54:48,040
Speaker 1: I think the most important conversations you ever have are

1140
00:54:48,080 --> 00:54:50,719
Speaker 1: with yourself, and some people really underestimate the fact that, like,

1141
00:54:50,760 --> 00:54:52,879
Speaker 1: well it's in my own brain, like what I'm saying

1142
00:54:52,880 --> 00:54:54,680
Speaker 1: to myself, how could that possibly make a difference no

1143
00:54:54,680 --> 00:54:56,560
Speaker 1: one else can even hear it. I think you hear

1144
00:54:56,640 --> 00:54:58,319
Speaker 1: that more than you hear what anyone else tells you.

1145
00:54:58,640 --> 00:54:59,880
Speaker 1: So switching that could.

1146
00:54:59,719 --> 00:55:01,080
Speaker 2: Be the mo powerful thing you ever do.

1147
00:55:01,120 --> 00:55:04,200
Speaker 1: I'm so excited. I'm so excited to watch you head

1148
00:55:04,239 --> 00:55:08,440
Speaker 1: to barrass. So the very last section is where we

1149
00:55:08,560 --> 00:55:10,160
Speaker 1: kind of you know, we've talked a lot about identity,

1150
00:55:10,200 --> 00:55:12,560
Speaker 1: and it's where we strip back the identity that most

1151
00:55:12,560 --> 00:55:15,239
Speaker 1: people know you as, and often most of the time

1152
00:55:15,239 --> 00:55:17,319
Speaker 1: it's the identity that you know and you've constructed for

1153
00:55:17,360 --> 00:55:21,520
Speaker 1: yourself as well, and just talk about what brings you joy.

1154
00:55:21,560 --> 00:55:24,600
Speaker 1: That's totally separate to boxing, that's totally separate to what

1155
00:55:24,640 --> 00:55:28,080
Speaker 1: you're passionate about. That's totally separate to breaking down stereotypes

1156
00:55:28,080 --> 00:55:28,920
Speaker 1: about masculinity.

1157
00:55:28,960 --> 00:55:30,879
Speaker 2: But it's just purely for fun.

1158
00:55:30,920 --> 00:55:34,400
Speaker 1: And often it's things that are not related to anything.

1159
00:55:34,400 --> 00:55:35,839
Speaker 1: You don't have to be good at it, but it's

1160
00:55:35,880 --> 00:55:37,680
Speaker 1: just the things. I kind of define it as those

1161
00:55:37,719 --> 00:55:40,319
Speaker 1: activities that make you forget what time it is when

1162
00:55:40,320 --> 00:55:41,960
Speaker 1: you're in a child comes out and you're just like

1163
00:55:42,719 --> 00:55:43,799
Speaker 1: just having a great time.

1164
00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:46,480
Speaker 2: What are the play like ways you play.

1165
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:48,359
Speaker 3: In your life? Yeah, that's the bit I actually listen

1166
00:55:48,360 --> 00:55:51,240
Speaker 3: to a podcast about this recently, and it's like, clay

1167
00:55:51,320 --> 00:55:53,759
Speaker 3: is one of the most important things. That's why I like,

1168
00:55:53,840 --> 00:55:56,799
Speaker 3: you look at kids and this so like just they're

1169
00:55:56,960 --> 00:55:59,439
Speaker 3: just in their own zone, and I think we lose

1170
00:55:59,640 --> 00:56:02,920
Speaker 3: as adults. And for me, I've noticed this more so

1171
00:56:03,680 --> 00:56:06,440
Speaker 3: to try and combat how I am in a relationship

1172
00:56:06,480 --> 00:56:09,759
Speaker 3: because I've really been unsuccessful in my past relationships and

1173
00:56:10,280 --> 00:56:12,880
Speaker 3: something it's because I get quite dependent and reliant on

1174
00:56:12,920 --> 00:56:16,160
Speaker 3: my partner and she's a social butterfly, loves going out.

1175
00:56:16,360 --> 00:56:18,279
Speaker 3: But then also as well, I've realized that I need

1176
00:56:18,320 --> 00:56:19,360
Speaker 3: to have my own things.

1177
00:56:19,400 --> 00:56:21,760
Speaker 1: And oh, you're a stage five clinger.

1178
00:56:22,239 --> 00:56:25,800
Speaker 3: I am. I've been working on it very hard, but

1179
00:56:25,880 --> 00:56:26,400
Speaker 3: I still am.

1180
00:56:33,040 --> 00:56:39,239
Speaker 2: You're like little amabor that, but just.

1181
00:56:39,120 --> 00:56:41,560
Speaker 3: Trying to find those things that I really enjoy, and

1182
00:56:42,000 --> 00:56:45,279
Speaker 3: those things are rock climbing, bouldering. I absolutely love it

1183
00:56:46,040 --> 00:56:48,840
Speaker 3: the best. And for me, the whole world kind of

1184
00:56:48,840 --> 00:56:52,120
Speaker 3: stops and time goes out the window and I'm just

1185
00:56:52,160 --> 00:56:54,160
Speaker 3: focusing on the wall and I'm pretty bad at it.

1186
00:56:54,160 --> 00:56:58,520
Speaker 3: So you're progressing quick. So surfing as well is something

1187
00:56:58,520 --> 00:57:01,560
Speaker 3: that I really love. I think the reasons as to

1188
00:57:01,600 --> 00:57:04,560
Speaker 3: why I love those two things it's because just like boxing,

1189
00:57:04,960 --> 00:57:08,360
Speaker 3: it's quite humbling. Like one, you're never bigger than the ocean.

1190
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:11,960
Speaker 3: Ocean always wins, and I'm so bad at rock climbing

1191
00:57:12,000 --> 00:57:15,399
Speaker 3: that really humbles me. So I think that's a beautiful thing,

1192
00:57:15,520 --> 00:57:17,400
Speaker 3: is doing things that you're really bad at and you're like, well,

1193
00:57:17,400 --> 00:57:19,040
Speaker 3: I want to try and beat this wall, or I

1194
00:57:19,080 --> 00:57:21,120
Speaker 3: want to try and get on this wave, And there

1195
00:57:21,120 --> 00:57:23,000
Speaker 3: are two places where I really find a lot of

1196
00:57:23,120 --> 00:57:24,520
Speaker 3: joy and peace and play.

1197
00:57:25,200 --> 00:57:28,240
Speaker 1: I think it's also almost always activities that you can't

1198
00:57:28,240 --> 00:57:31,440
Speaker 1: they're mutually exclusive with doing anything else, like they consume

1199
00:57:31,560 --> 00:57:35,520
Speaker 1: your whole being. And it's usually because like you choose

1200
00:57:35,520 --> 00:57:37,520
Speaker 1: things that you shit at because if you're good at them,

1201
00:57:37,560 --> 00:57:38,880
Speaker 1: and you just co through them and you'll be able

1202
00:57:38,880 --> 00:57:40,120
Speaker 1: to be on your phone at the same time, like

1203
00:57:40,200 --> 00:57:41,560
Speaker 1: you can't serf and be on your phone.

1204
00:57:41,880 --> 00:57:43,360
Speaker 2: So I love that.

1205
00:57:43,480 --> 00:57:45,600
Speaker 1: It's usually like if you can't use your phone, it's

1206
00:57:45,640 --> 00:57:51,680
Speaker 1: a good play to It's so true. Just to finish up,

1207
00:57:51,760 --> 00:57:54,600
Speaker 1: second last question is three interesting things about you that

1208
00:57:54,720 --> 00:57:57,240
Speaker 1: don't normally come up in conversation. And as you said,

1209
00:57:57,240 --> 00:57:58,640
Speaker 1: you're a bit of an open book, so this is.

1210
00:57:58,560 --> 00:57:59,120
Speaker 2: A hard one.

1211
00:57:59,320 --> 00:58:02,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, I found this one hard, but I wrote a

1212
00:58:02,520 --> 00:58:05,640
Speaker 3: little list. There's four and you can pull. I much

1213
00:58:05,760 --> 00:58:09,240
Speaker 3: mention all of them, to be honest, But Olympics not

1214
00:58:09,360 --> 00:58:11,760
Speaker 3: living up to what I hoped. That's something that I've

1215
00:58:11,800 --> 00:58:13,760
Speaker 3: been navigating lately, as.

1216
00:58:13,560 --> 00:58:16,560
Speaker 2: In the result or the overall experience.

1217
00:58:16,360 --> 00:58:18,600
Speaker 3: A bit of both. And obviously I don't know because

1218
00:58:18,640 --> 00:58:20,800
Speaker 3: I've never been in Olympics, but I don't know if

1219
00:58:20,800 --> 00:58:23,280
Speaker 3: it's because of the COVID, I don't know what it was.

1220
00:58:23,600 --> 00:58:26,200
Speaker 3: And also for me when I was in the actual games,

1221
00:58:26,960 --> 00:58:30,280
Speaker 3: I'm focusing purely on results. I'm there for business. I'm

1222
00:58:30,280 --> 00:58:32,440
Speaker 3: not there to really soak up the experience and go

1223
00:58:32,480 --> 00:58:35,040
Speaker 3: to the dining hall or I'm there to compete. I'm

1224
00:58:35,080 --> 00:58:37,640
Speaker 3: there to win that gold medal. And so because of that,

1225
00:58:37,680 --> 00:58:41,880
Speaker 3: I'm not going out socializing really taking it in. I

1226
00:58:41,920 --> 00:58:44,720
Speaker 3: was more so just focusing on what I could focus on,

1227
00:58:44,760 --> 00:58:46,160
Speaker 3: and I spent a lot of my time in my

1228
00:58:46,280 --> 00:58:50,680
Speaker 3: room watching a movie or relaxing and focusing on comp

1229
00:58:50,800 --> 00:58:53,680
Speaker 3: So pondering, yeah, pondering hardcore.

1230
00:58:59,320 --> 00:59:00,480
Speaker 2: I can imagine, you know, like.

1231
00:59:00,480 --> 00:59:03,280
Speaker 1: A monastery doing like a Zen Buddhist monk kind of

1232
00:59:04,120 --> 00:59:06,920
Speaker 1: like stay just for like you know, a year of

1233
00:59:06,960 --> 00:59:09,680
Speaker 1: like silence, just to let your brain go to town.

1234
00:59:10,360 --> 00:59:12,400
Speaker 3: I've thought about, you know, I think it's called I

1235
00:59:12,440 --> 00:59:14,240
Speaker 3: can't remember exactly what it's called, but that twenty one

1236
00:59:14,320 --> 00:59:17,680
Speaker 3: for part one day silent meditated. Oh my, that is

1237
00:59:17,760 --> 00:59:18,680
Speaker 3: up my alley.

1238
00:59:19,760 --> 00:59:21,800
Speaker 2: I actually am surprised you haven't done one yet.

1239
00:59:22,200 --> 00:59:24,840
Speaker 3: It's time. I really want to. There's a ten day

1240
00:59:24,920 --> 00:59:27,200
Speaker 3: one ten day would still be challenging. There's a ten

1241
00:59:27,240 --> 00:59:29,400
Speaker 3: day one year where I grew up in Melbourne. I

1242
00:59:29,440 --> 00:59:31,600
Speaker 3: really want to try it. So one day.

1243
00:59:32,080 --> 00:59:34,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've had quite a few friends do that, the

1244
00:59:34,200 --> 00:59:36,640
Speaker 1: one in Melbourne. Yeah, yeah, so one day and they

1245
00:59:36,800 --> 00:59:38,600
Speaker 1: like life changing, life changing.

1246
00:59:38,680 --> 00:59:41,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, they say like day seven, day eight, You're really

1247
00:59:41,160 --> 00:59:42,959
Speaker 3: like no this, I can't do this. And then there's

1248
00:59:42,960 --> 00:59:45,120
Speaker 3: something that happens, say eight day nine, day ten.

1249
00:59:45,320 --> 00:59:48,800
Speaker 2: So the devil leaves your body and you're like a

1250
00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:49,400
Speaker 2: new person.

1251
00:59:49,800 --> 00:59:51,240
Speaker 3: The devil enters your body.

1252
00:59:52,160 --> 01:00:00,040
Speaker 4: Yeah alright, So I already said love for rock climbing

1253
01:00:00,080 --> 01:00:03,240
Speaker 4: and surfing, latch myself to my identity as a teenager

1254
01:00:03,960 --> 01:00:05,440
Speaker 4: something that I've been trying.

1255
01:00:05,200 --> 01:00:09,840
Speaker 3: To navigate lately. It's like I did things, said things,

1256
01:00:10,200 --> 01:00:13,600
Speaker 3: was things when I was younger. I was hopeless in relationships.

1257
01:00:13,680 --> 01:00:16,120
Speaker 3: I was hopeless to some people, I was a poor human,

1258
01:00:16,160 --> 01:00:20,080
Speaker 3: and I haven't fully forgiven myself for those things when

1259
01:00:20,080 --> 01:00:22,560
Speaker 3: I was in high school or after high school. And

1260
01:00:22,600 --> 01:00:26,400
Speaker 3: it's like sometimes I latch myself to that identity, yeah,

1261
01:00:26,400 --> 01:00:28,560
Speaker 3: which is something that I'm trying to navigate because it's

1262
01:00:28,640 --> 01:00:31,880
Speaker 3: like I did that say when I'm fifteen, you do something,

1263
01:00:32,280 --> 01:00:35,000
Speaker 3: and then it's like I don't take into account the

1264
01:00:35,080 --> 01:00:37,240
Speaker 3: last ten years of growth and the person that I

1265
01:00:37,280 --> 01:00:40,000
Speaker 3: am right now, and it's like sometimes there's that little

1266
01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:42,240
Speaker 3: bit of like, oh, wonder if people are going to

1267
01:00:42,240 --> 01:00:44,400
Speaker 3: find out the real media because I'm still latching myself

1268
01:00:44,440 --> 01:00:47,160
Speaker 3: so that identity as a teenager. So that's something that

1269
01:00:47,200 --> 01:00:49,000
Speaker 3: I'm trying to navigate. I'm just trying to let go

1270
01:00:49,160 --> 01:00:50,680
Speaker 3: of things that I did and it's like a bit

1271
01:00:50,720 --> 01:00:53,000
Speaker 3: of a clean slate with self, but it is an

1272
01:00:53,040 --> 01:00:56,680
Speaker 3: ongoing process. And then the last seeing people pleasing tendency,

1273
01:00:57,520 --> 01:01:00,400
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, a bit of a people please it like, yeah, okay,

1274
01:01:00,440 --> 01:01:00,920
Speaker 3: no worries.

1275
01:01:03,440 --> 01:01:05,200
Speaker 2: I literally made a TikTok last night.

1276
01:01:05,240 --> 01:01:08,000
Speaker 1: There was like real footage of me putting my foot

1277
01:01:08,040 --> 01:01:09,880
Speaker 1: down and being assertive to get what I want.

1278
01:01:10,240 --> 01:01:11,800
Speaker 2: And then it's like me, Dad, do you want thing?

1279
01:01:12,120 --> 01:01:14,640
Speaker 2: No worries, I'll totally do that. Can I do it

1280
01:01:14,640 --> 01:01:15,720
Speaker 2: straight away for you?

1281
01:01:16,440 --> 01:01:17,800
Speaker 3: I understand, no worries.

1282
01:01:17,880 --> 01:01:23,920
Speaker 1: If not, oh my god, no pressure, don't even worry especially,

1283
01:01:23,960 --> 01:01:26,280
Speaker 1: don't even worry about It's totally fine. Like ignore what

1284
01:01:26,320 --> 01:01:29,440
Speaker 1: I said. I'm like, oh my god, my life. I'm

1285
01:01:29,520 --> 01:01:30,160
Speaker 1: so bad.

1286
01:01:30,560 --> 01:01:32,960
Speaker 3: It's crazy. And I thought about it, like why don't

1287
01:01:32,960 --> 01:01:35,160
Speaker 3: we do that. It's like the people that I choose

1288
01:01:35,160 --> 01:01:36,760
Speaker 3: the let in. I don't let in many people, but

1289
01:01:36,800 --> 01:01:39,040
Speaker 3: there's people that I choose to let in. I'm really

1290
01:01:39,040 --> 01:01:41,440
Speaker 3: scared that they're going to leave you or you not

1291
01:01:41,520 --> 01:01:43,880
Speaker 3: love me anymore, or and I think it's just it's

1292
01:01:43,920 --> 01:01:47,680
Speaker 3: just always like oh yeah, whatever, yeah, you know, do

1293
01:01:47,240 --> 01:01:50,280
Speaker 3: we do heaps of access service and yeah, I just

1294
01:01:50,400 --> 01:01:53,000
Speaker 3: it's something that I'm trying to navigate and my life coach.

1295
01:01:53,120 --> 01:01:55,280
Speaker 3: For anyone who is the people pleaser that's listening to this,

1296
01:01:55,880 --> 01:02:00,520
Speaker 3: it's like, try it for a month. When someone asks you, hey, Harry,

1297
01:02:00,560 --> 01:02:02,600
Speaker 3: do you want to coffee? Just something small like that,

1298
01:02:02,840 --> 01:02:04,800
Speaker 3: just just go hey, can you just give me a sec?

1299
01:02:05,320 --> 01:02:07,480
Speaker 3: And it's like, even if you really want a coffee,

1300
01:02:07,800 --> 01:02:10,960
Speaker 3: you're freeing up the space to actually think about what

1301
01:02:11,000 --> 01:02:13,479
Speaker 3: you want. And it's like even just by saying yeah,

1302
01:02:13,480 --> 01:02:15,640
Speaker 3: and I think that's a really powerful thing. So something

1303
01:02:15,680 --> 01:02:18,520
Speaker 3: that I've been slowly trying to integrate. Someone asked me,

1304
01:02:18,520 --> 01:02:20,400
Speaker 3: what's something that I want to do? Even if it's

1305
01:02:20,400 --> 01:02:21,880
Speaker 3: something I really want to do, I just go, hey,

1306
01:02:21,880 --> 01:02:23,400
Speaker 3: could just give me a second, I'll come back to you.

1307
01:02:23,520 --> 01:02:25,600
Speaker 3: Or and I think that's a really powerful thing.

1308
01:02:26,080 --> 01:02:28,480
Speaker 2: That is groundbreaking.

1309
01:02:29,040 --> 01:02:33,360
Speaker 1: Oh god, it's like giving your body a chance to override.

1310
01:02:33,440 --> 01:02:34,960
Speaker 2: It's like natural.

1311
01:02:36,240 --> 01:02:39,360
Speaker 3: Pilot. Yeah, and shout out to to why he should

1312
01:02:39,480 --> 01:02:42,600
Speaker 3: be amenda project And yeah, he's been my life coach

1313
01:02:42,640 --> 01:02:45,840
Speaker 3: about six months and I love everything that is about whoa.

1314
01:02:46,560 --> 01:02:47,160
Speaker 2: Whoa?

1315
01:02:47,280 --> 01:02:49,560
Speaker 1: That is like going to change my life, seriously going

1316
01:02:49,560 --> 01:02:50,240
Speaker 1: to change my life.

1317
01:02:50,440 --> 01:02:52,680
Speaker 2: WHOA. I can't allieve that.

1318
01:02:52,720 --> 01:02:55,080
Speaker 1: It's like you're so automatic in the way that you

1319
01:02:55,160 --> 01:03:00,200
Speaker 1: answer that just saying I can just imagine someone get

1320
01:03:00,200 --> 01:03:01,880
Speaker 1: the shop being like, what would you like fries?

1321
01:03:01,960 --> 01:03:02,560
Speaker 2: With that? Hold on?

1322
01:03:04,080 --> 01:03:07,520
Speaker 3: Give me we have good?

1323
01:03:08,000 --> 01:03:12,400
Speaker 1: Okay, mate to drive through and there's like twenty cars

1324
01:03:12,480 --> 01:03:13,280
Speaker 1: behind you.

1325
01:03:13,680 --> 01:03:14,600
Speaker 2: Do you want the prize or not?

1326
01:03:21,680 --> 01:03:24,240
Speaker 3: Something else is because as I said, relationships something that

1327
01:03:24,240 --> 01:03:26,200
Speaker 3: I really struggle with. Something else is really helped me

1328
01:03:26,240 --> 01:03:30,040
Speaker 3: with It's like role playing arguments with your partner. So

1329
01:03:30,080 --> 01:03:32,680
Speaker 3: it's like when you argued with your partner and things

1330
01:03:32,720 --> 01:03:34,520
Speaker 3: didn't go how you wanted them to go, it's like

1331
01:03:34,680 --> 01:03:37,360
Speaker 3: role playing the actual scenario that you wanted to happen.

1332
01:03:37,800 --> 01:03:39,840
Speaker 3: And it's like at least that it's in your body

1333
01:03:39,960 --> 01:03:42,439
Speaker 3: because often we're in autopilot in those moments, and it's

1334
01:03:42,480 --> 01:03:44,880
Speaker 3: like if you can do it five times, at least

1335
01:03:44,880 --> 01:03:47,080
Speaker 3: you've done it five times, so your body knows that

1336
01:03:47,120 --> 01:03:48,439
Speaker 3: there is a different direction.

1337
01:03:48,560 --> 01:03:51,640
Speaker 1: You can go, Oh my god, that's so clever. I

1338
01:03:51,760 --> 01:03:53,960
Speaker 1: just like more and more. Just think, the key to

1339
01:03:54,160 --> 01:03:57,640
Speaker 1: happiness and success in life, not success in terms of

1340
01:03:57,640 --> 01:04:00,280
Speaker 1: like money or anything, but success at getting the life

1341
01:04:00,280 --> 01:04:01,640
Speaker 1: that you want, all the results that you want out

1342
01:04:01,640 --> 01:04:03,280
Speaker 1: of your life is just to hack your own brain,

1343
01:04:03,760 --> 01:04:05,960
Speaker 1: like figure out the patterns that you don't like and

1344
01:04:06,000 --> 01:04:09,080
Speaker 1: then just interrupt them, like practice until you.

1345
01:04:09,080 --> 01:04:11,000
Speaker 2: Rewire that pathway.

1346
01:04:11,040 --> 01:04:14,240
Speaker 1: Even like I shared something the other day about even

1347
01:04:14,240 --> 01:04:16,520
Speaker 1: on the podcast or in speaking gigs, not using the

1348
01:04:16,520 --> 01:04:20,160
Speaker 1: word um, like the in law. If you say um,

1349
01:04:20,360 --> 01:04:22,960
Speaker 1: even though it doesn't actually mean anything about your intelligence,

1350
01:04:23,000 --> 01:04:25,680
Speaker 1: it just changes how persuasive you sound to someone else,

1351
01:04:26,280 --> 01:04:29,280
Speaker 1: and no one is ever going to not you know,

1352
01:04:29,360 --> 01:04:31,080
Speaker 1: need to pause every now and then to think about

1353
01:04:31,120 --> 01:04:34,040
Speaker 1: what they're saying. But instead of saying am, you just

1354
01:04:34,680 --> 01:04:36,320
Speaker 1: change it with another word. You just change it with

1355
01:04:36,360 --> 01:04:40,040
Speaker 1: a sow or and so, and you teach your brain

1356
01:04:40,120 --> 01:04:41,640
Speaker 1: and you're still buying the same amount of time as

1357
01:04:41,680 --> 01:04:44,240
Speaker 1: unbuyas you You just sound so much more eloquent. And

1358
01:04:44,440 --> 01:04:46,160
Speaker 1: I think I shared it on TikTok or something and

1359
01:04:46,160 --> 01:04:52,000
Speaker 1: people were like brain explosion, Like they've never known how

1360
01:04:52,120 --> 01:04:55,160
Speaker 1: lawyers never say um. And it's like they're definitely not

1361
01:04:55,160 --> 01:04:57,720
Speaker 1: not brain farighting. They're just using a different word and

1362
01:04:57,760 --> 01:04:59,360
Speaker 1: they practice replacing that.

1363
01:04:59,360 --> 01:05:01,640
Speaker 2: You can do that with anything. I love that so clever.

1364
01:05:01,800 --> 01:05:03,600
Speaker 3: It just brought me back to a thought. When I

1365
01:05:03,600 --> 01:05:06,040
Speaker 3: was in primary school, we spent maths TV, so our

1366
01:05:06,080 --> 01:05:08,240
Speaker 3: time stable to you. You'd be around the room with

1367
01:05:08,320 --> 01:05:10,800
Speaker 3: the teacher and yell at a timestable and she was

1368
01:05:11,080 --> 01:05:13,520
Speaker 3: yelled at four times four and I would say, what

1369
01:05:13,520 --> 01:05:15,240
Speaker 3: did you say? And then in that time, I'm thinking

1370
01:05:15,280 --> 01:05:17,960
Speaker 3: about the poor and then she would say four times four,

1371
01:05:18,200 --> 01:05:19,160
Speaker 3: I'm like sixteen.

1372
01:05:26,040 --> 01:05:26,680
Speaker 2: It's like I.

1373
01:05:26,600 --> 01:05:29,800
Speaker 1: Still have I'm like thirty three or whatever. I am

1374
01:05:29,880 --> 01:05:31,360
Speaker 1: now and I still have to go A, B, C

1375
01:05:31,560 --> 01:05:35,120
Speaker 1: D like to figure out which the next letter. I

1376
01:05:35,120 --> 01:05:39,080
Speaker 1: have to go from A every time, So I'm like, well, wait,

1377
01:05:39,440 --> 01:05:40,640
Speaker 1: what did you say ABCD?

1378
01:05:41,320 --> 01:05:43,320
Speaker 3: I'd like to get love that?

1379
01:05:43,800 --> 01:05:47,280
Speaker 2: Oh my god's hilarious. And very last question for you,

1380
01:05:47,680 --> 01:05:48,800
Speaker 2: what is your favorite quote?

1381
01:05:49,240 --> 01:05:51,640
Speaker 3: So's it's quite a long one, but it's The Man

1382
01:05:51,720 --> 01:05:55,000
Speaker 3: in the Arena by Theodore Rash Yeah.

1383
01:05:55,160 --> 01:05:56,200
Speaker 2: I love that quote.

1384
01:05:56,680 --> 01:05:58,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, more than happy to read it. But people who

1385
01:05:58,280 --> 01:06:00,560
Speaker 3: don't know it, yeah, look at up. It's unbelievable.

1386
01:06:00,600 --> 01:06:03,400
Speaker 1: I'll do you read it, Yeah, especially because you are

1387
01:06:03,520 --> 01:06:05,840
Speaker 1: actually the man in the arena, Like this is hilarious

1388
01:06:05,920 --> 01:06:09,800
Speaker 1: because you are a man inside an arena right right now.

1389
01:06:09,960 --> 01:06:15,320
Speaker 3: This is a boxing match right now. Yeah, excuse my reading.

1390
01:06:15,400 --> 01:06:18,360
Speaker 3: But it's not the critic who counts, not the man

1391
01:06:18,400 --> 01:06:21,280
Speaker 3: who points out how the strong man symbols or where

1392
01:06:21,280 --> 01:06:23,880
Speaker 3: the doer of deeds could have done them better. The

1393
01:06:24,000 --> 01:06:26,440
Speaker 3: credit belongs to the man who was actually in the arena,

1394
01:06:27,240 --> 01:06:30,080
Speaker 3: whose face is mad by dust and sweat and blood,

1395
01:06:30,480 --> 01:06:34,520
Speaker 3: who strives valiantly, who ers, who comes short again and

1396
01:06:34,640 --> 01:06:38,120
Speaker 3: again because there is no effort without error and shortcoming,

1397
01:06:38,760 --> 01:06:41,640
Speaker 3: but who does actually strive to do the deeds. Who

1398
01:06:41,720 --> 01:06:45,880
Speaker 3: knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself in

1399
01:06:45,960 --> 01:06:48,840
Speaker 3: a worthy cause? Who are the best? Knows in the

1400
01:06:49,040 --> 01:06:52,960
Speaker 3: end the triumph of high achievement, And who, at the worst,

1401
01:06:53,360 --> 01:06:56,480
Speaker 3: if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly,

1402
01:06:57,160 --> 01:06:59,720
Speaker 3: so that his place shall never be with those cold

1403
01:06:59,800 --> 01:07:02,800
Speaker 3: and souls. You neither know victory nor defeat.

1404
01:07:03,600 --> 01:07:06,280
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, so good. It's such a good one,

1405
01:07:06,400 --> 01:07:06,800
Speaker 2: the best.

1406
01:07:07,320 --> 01:07:09,720
Speaker 1: I love that, do you know, Like no other quote

1407
01:07:09,960 --> 01:07:12,200
Speaker 1: has been repeated, Like no other person has had the

1408
01:07:12,240 --> 01:07:13,880
Speaker 1: same favorite quote except that quote.

1409
01:07:14,400 --> 01:07:19,240
Speaker 2: Like ten people. It's like the most universally quoted quote.

1410
01:07:19,480 --> 01:07:22,840
Speaker 3: It's it's really helped me in the sense of like

1411
01:07:23,000 --> 01:07:24,920
Speaker 3: pricing in the icuonone cared about what to do with

1412
01:07:25,000 --> 01:07:28,520
Speaker 3: my life, no one coming to no one. And now

1413
01:07:28,600 --> 01:07:31,800
Speaker 3: it's like, yes, you get thousands of positivity and love,

1414
01:07:32,080 --> 01:07:34,840
Speaker 3: but there's that one percent who try and get you,

1415
01:07:34,920 --> 01:07:36,720
Speaker 3: and they said rude things, and you think about that

1416
01:07:36,840 --> 01:07:40,000
Speaker 3: comment and then that quote always brings me back to

1417
01:07:40,160 --> 01:07:43,040
Speaker 3: like they're not in the arena. They don't know what

1418
01:07:43,160 --> 01:07:45,560
Speaker 3: I'm going through, they don't know what I'm doing. I

1419
01:07:45,760 --> 01:07:48,800
Speaker 3: know I'm striving for it, and I think it always

1420
01:07:48,880 --> 01:07:52,360
Speaker 3: just brings me back to like, Okay, Mars be settled.

1421
01:07:52,840 --> 01:07:53,440
Speaker 2: Amazing.

1422
01:07:53,680 --> 01:07:56,280
Speaker 1: Well, Harry, thank you so much for your time. I

1423
01:07:56,400 --> 01:07:59,840
Speaker 1: admire you so much. You will have such an extraordinary

1424
01:08:00,760 --> 01:08:03,360
Speaker 1: and such an extraordinary ability to articulate what's going on

1425
01:08:03,520 --> 01:08:06,160
Speaker 1: up there, So thank you so much for sharing it

1426
01:08:06,360 --> 01:08:10,440
Speaker 1: with our yighborhood as I call. I could have literally

1427
01:08:10,480 --> 01:08:12,320
Speaker 1: talked to you for hours, but I appreciate your time

1428
01:08:12,440 --> 01:08:12,720
Speaker 1: so much.

1429
01:08:13,000 --> 01:08:15,919
Speaker 2: Thank you so much having me on What a role

1430
01:08:16,040 --> 01:08:16,639
Speaker 2: model right?

1431
01:08:17,000 --> 01:08:19,120
Speaker 1: I wish I could spend a week or a month

1432
01:08:19,240 --> 01:08:21,320
Speaker 1: shadowing Harry just to learn more from the way his

1433
01:08:21,520 --> 01:08:24,880
Speaker 1: brain works and help share that with young boys, men

1434
01:08:25,000 --> 01:08:28,000
Speaker 1: and really everyone as much as possible. As always, we

1435
01:08:28,160 --> 01:08:30,760
Speaker 1: are so lucky that our guests are so willing to

1436
01:08:30,800 --> 01:08:33,479
Speaker 1: give us their time, So please do share the episode

1437
01:08:33,520 --> 01:08:38,000
Speaker 1: and tag at Harry Underscore Guarside, showering him with yighborhood love,

1438
01:08:38,240 --> 01:08:40,599
Speaker 1: or any takeaways that you have to keep helping us

1439
01:08:40,640 --> 01:08:43,519
Speaker 1: grow as far and wide as possible. I promise you

1440
01:08:43,600 --> 01:08:46,120
Speaker 1: will very soon be getting another dose of and and

1441
01:08:46,280 --> 01:08:49,600
Speaker 1: yeas of our lives with some reflections from Egypt and

1442
01:08:49,640 --> 01:08:50,160
Speaker 1: the Honeymoon.

1443
01:08:50,280 --> 01:08:52,000
Speaker 2: So keep your ears appealed.

1444
01:08:52,120 --> 01:08:54,919
Speaker 1: I hope you're having an amazing week and as seizing

1445
01:08:55,040 --> 01:08:55,479
Speaker 1: your yeay