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Speaker 1: You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast.

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Speaker 2: Mama Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters

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Speaker 2: that this podcast is recorded on.

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Speaker 3: Welcome to mommea out loud where women come to debrief.

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Speaker 1: I am Jesse Stevens, I'm mea Friedman, and I'm m Burnham.

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Speaker 3: And here's what we're talking about today, Friday, the fourth

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Speaker 3: of July. The trick being used by real estate agents

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Speaker 3: that renters have had enough of.

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Speaker 1: Plus, you're a bitch and that's why we lack community.

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Speaker 1: We are going to unpack the idea of this small

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Speaker 1: favor economy and an essay that we all read that

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Speaker 1: punch me in the herd a little bit and it

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Speaker 1: could change how you think about loneliness and friendship and

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Speaker 1: what you're doing with your life.

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Speaker 2: And recommendations. Jesse is busting to tell us about a

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Speaker 2: documentary with significantly less poop than the last one. Mia

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Speaker 2: has just discovered Miss Rachel, and I need to tell

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Speaker 2: you about a thirty dollars beauty product that I should

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Speaker 2: have tried months ago.

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Speaker 1: Before we start the show, though, I want to call

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Speaker 1: a little meeting to discuss bitch diesel. We spoke about

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Speaker 1: it on the show last week. I can't remember how

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Speaker 1: it came up. I don't think you were even here.

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Speaker 4: So let's forget who started.

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Speaker 1: We gave you credit, Okay, you stated give me credit,

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Speaker 1: so to catch people up who might have missed the show.

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Speaker 1: Bitch diesel is what people call just what.

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Speaker 2: People I can't coin the term. I guess I made

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Speaker 2: a FROs.

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Speaker 1: You made it famous in our live show. You did

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Speaker 1: a little bit and you'd referred to rose, and men

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Speaker 1: called cool.

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Speaker 4: People call it bitch diesel.

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Speaker 1: Okay, So then we started talking about how all these

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Speaker 1: celebrities have their own.

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Speaker 3: Megan Markle brand new rose coming. I think just this

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Speaker 3: week she dropped it.

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Speaker 1: Kylie's got a rose. I think Brad Pitt's got a rose.

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Speaker 3: That all the cool people have a rose, which got

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Speaker 3: us thinking.

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Speaker 1: Should we have a rose? And we kind of just said, hey,

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Speaker 1: maybe we should. So then we got inundated winemakers, alcohol companies,

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Speaker 1: people saying we would like to make this dream come

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Speaker 1: true and make out loud bitch diesel. Yes, do you

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Speaker 1: think we should do it?

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Speaker 3: I'm totally on board. I think this is a community assignment.

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Speaker 3: I think what could be fun is that only one

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Speaker 3: of us here has any business have we and I

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Speaker 3: think I'm going to keep forgetting. Yes, I'll bring the

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Speaker 3: vibes and the energy. What are you going to bring them?

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Speaker 2: I brought the name, so I'm quite interested in the

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Speaker 2: splitting of the.

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Speaker 1: Profits Bitch Diesel and the tasting and has some questions

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Speaker 1: about IP I think, yeah, I should have had this

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Speaker 1: conversation before we did this.

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Speaker 4: Clearly true.

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Speaker 1: So there's all these things to consider. Also whether the

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Speaker 1: word bitch is a problem or are we reclaiming it? Oh?

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Speaker 4: I love it.

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Speaker 3: I love it.

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Speaker 1: Okay, we've reclaimed it.

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Speaker 3: Let's bring me out loud.

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Speaker 1: That's going to taste good, So let's out loud. As

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Speaker 1: We're going to venture ahead into this new world of

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Speaker 1: Bitch Diesel and launching our own rose potentially. We will

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Speaker 1: keep you updated with regular installments, and I'm going to

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Speaker 1: teach these bitches how to start a business.

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Speaker 4: So oh, free learning.

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Speaker 1: Maybe by the end of it, Jesse, you will be

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Speaker 1: able to pronounce the word entrepreneur.

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Speaker 3: No, I still can't.

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Speaker 2: In case you miss it, there is some new lingo

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Speaker 2: in twenty twenty five that I need to talk to

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Speaker 2: you guys about because I'm tired of saying phrases and

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Speaker 2: neither of you two understand what I'm saying.

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Speaker 3: I thought we did very good fake faces where we

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Speaker 3: act like we're going along with it, but we have

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Speaker 3: no idea what you're talking about.

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Speaker 1: I like to make this some regular segment because you know,

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Speaker 1: when you become aware that you are not using current lingo, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: like the word lingo for example. So I'm here for

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Speaker 1: this to learn some more some language.

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Speaker 2: Okay, So in today's lesson, we're going to go over

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Speaker 2: two phrases. And now I don't want you to take

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Speaker 2: because I know what you guys do. You take these

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Speaker 2: phrases and you just run wild with them and you

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Speaker 2: use them all the time until they become uncol and

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Speaker 2: you keep using them.

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Speaker 1: Like skibbity toilet. I've only guess stoped. We're done.

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Speaker 4: We're done with skimney toilet. We're done with that.

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Speaker 2: The first phrase I want to go over is crashing out.

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Speaker 2: Have you heard of this term?

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Speaker 3: On TikTok they're always talking about crashing out.

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Speaker 4: Yes, you're close.

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Speaker 2: So crashing out is the new nervy bee, like a

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Speaker 2: nervous breakdown. So it means when you're about to have

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Speaker 2: some sort of emotional or physical breakdown. It's basically crashing out,

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Speaker 2: not to be So the tense is really important here

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Speaker 2: because you know how sometimes I'll be like, hey, Mia,

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Speaker 2: what did you do when you got home last night?

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Speaker 2: And you're like, oh, I just went to bed and

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Speaker 2: crashed out.

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Speaker 4: That's different. That means I'm just going to bed. I'm tired.

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Speaker 2: But if you were to say I went home and

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Speaker 2: I was crashing out or I'm about to crash out,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, burnout. If you don't address this right now, something.

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Speaker 4: Could go right.

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Speaker 3: So this is when jen z have a feeling, Okay.

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Speaker 1: I'm crashing out. I think I've been crashing out for

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Speaker 1: almost twenty years. Is that a thing that could be true?

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Speaker 4: No, I think that's just burnout.

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Speaker 1: I think crashing out is like really in the.

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Speaker 2: Moment, like it's happening right now, and you're running on

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Speaker 2: an empty tank, and if you don't address it right now,

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Speaker 2: then something bad.

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Speaker 3: All right, So millennials would call this losing your shit, wigging.

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Speaker 4: Out, I'm having a breakdown.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, all that, and some of the language that

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Speaker 3: we use around this not very politically correct, not very

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Speaker 3: sensitive to people with legitimate mental illnesses. So I think

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Speaker 3: crashing out is a way to say it that is sensitive.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: And so instead of saying I'm having a mentibe having

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Speaker 1: a nerve bee, we say I'm crashing yeah. H.

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Speaker 2: You can say about someone else like oh, I feel

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Speaker 2: like you're crashing out right now, and you'll be like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I feel it.

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Speaker 3: Okay.

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Speaker 2: The next phrase I want to go over is locking in.

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Speaker 3: I've been hearing this one around quite a bit.

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Speaker 4: Okay.

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Speaker 2: So locking in means putting extreme focus on a single

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Speaker 2: task and ignoring all other distractions.

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Speaker 3: Is when gen Z puts their phone down. I feel

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Speaker 3: like gen.

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Speaker 1: Z ONCEHD takes their meds yes, yes, or is just

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Speaker 1: very interested in something even if you haven't taken your medal.

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Speaker 3: I was reading about this though, and it's like I

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Speaker 3: locked in and cleaned my room. I was like, no,

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Speaker 3: you just did a job. You just put your phone

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Speaker 3: out and you made a meal, and now in a

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Speaker 3: locked in.

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Speaker 2: No, it actually works like locked into something I tell

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Speaker 2: myself all the time. If I'm meant to be writing

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Speaker 2: an article, don't tell my boss, ma'am, don't listen. If

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Speaker 2: I'm meant to be writing an article but I'm scrolling

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Speaker 2: my phone, I literally go to myself lock in, bitch.

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Speaker 4: And then I'll just start writing my article like that.

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Speaker 2: And you're on your computer and someone comes up to

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Speaker 2: talk to you, I'll be like, she's locked in.

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Speaker 1: Doesn't matter what tense I use, doesn't matter. I can

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Speaker 1: say locked in, locking.

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Speaker 2: In, locking in, yeah, lock in, Okay, So now I'm

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Speaker 2: going to lock in and continue the rest of this episode.

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Speaker 3: Love it.

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Speaker 1: There's a new kind of selfishness that masquerades as healing.

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Speaker 1: It wears skin care and cancelations like armor. It calls

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Speaker 1: everything a boundary and nothing a bridge. You know, the type.

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Speaker 1: They won't come to your dinner because they're listening to

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Speaker 1: their body, but they'll watch three hours of tiktoks alone

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Speaker 1: and call it self care. They believe they're owed the

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Speaker 1: fruits of community without ever touching the soil. No awkward

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Speaker 1: small talk, no showing up early or staying late, just vibes.

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Speaker 1: They think putting themselves first is some kind of moral

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Speaker 1: high ground. But what they don't realize is that when

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Speaker 1: everyone chooses themselves, no one chooses each other. And that's

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Speaker 1: how the world ends, not with a bang, but with

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Speaker 1: a thousand unopened invitations. These are the words of a

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Speaker 1: writer called Maser who has a newsletter called Personal Scriptures,

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Speaker 1: and producer Ruth put this into our consideration set to

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Speaker 1: talk about on the show.

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Speaker 3: Do you think she's trying to tell us that we're

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Speaker 3: a bitch?

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Speaker 1: Well, the newsletter was called You're a bitch, that's why

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Speaker 1: we lack community.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't want to get sent back.

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Speaker 1: It immediately got me and it is the most extraordinary

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Speaker 1: piece about Yeah, this idea of we all complained about community.

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Speaker 1: We all complain that we're lonely, but none of us

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Speaker 1: want to inconvenience ourselves to show up for someone else

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Speaker 1: or help someone else, or do anything that's out of

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Speaker 1: our comfort zone. You know.

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Speaker 4: We have a lot of.

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Speaker 1: Talk about boundaries. And after I read that, there were

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Speaker 1: two other things that I saw this week which sort

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Speaker 1: of I want to unpack all of them together. One

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Speaker 1: was a TikTok about the small favor economy, which also

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Speaker 1: relates to this idea of community.

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Speaker 5: Listen, I think it's okay to ask your friends for

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Speaker 5: ride to the airport, even lax, even at rush hour.

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Speaker 5: And actually it's more than okay. It's radical because there's

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Speaker 5: this thing called the small favors economy and the idea

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Speaker 5: is essentially that in the past, people used to rely

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Speaker 5: on their community, their network, their neighbors for small favors,

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Speaker 5: things like rides to the airport, things like a cup

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Speaker 5: of sugar, things like borrowing a dress for an event.

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Speaker 5: But now with late stage capitalism, those things all seem

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Speaker 5: like rude for us to ask, because we could just

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Speaker 5: do them ourselves, Like we could just call an uber

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Speaker 5: instead of inconveniencing a friend, or we could order a

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Speaker 5: dress on Amazon and have it get there tomorrow, or

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Speaker 5: we could like post made our groceries instead of like

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Speaker 5: asking around if anyone has anything. And that's actually really

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Speaker 5: bad because it drives us further into isolation from each

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Speaker 5: other and from our friends, which is good for literally

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Speaker 5: no one except for the people who are trying to

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Speaker 5: sell us stuff on our phones.

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Speaker 1: It's a little bit longer, but that's just the crux

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Speaker 1: of it. That's a digital strategist and content cretic called

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Speaker 1: Amelia Montooth. And then I read this story in The

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Speaker 1: Atlantic about how a wedding is a real test of

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Speaker 1: how many people will help you and how big events

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Speaker 1: in life, whether it's you know, a breakup or funeral

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Speaker 1: law or a wedding. You then really see people will

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Speaker 1: offer help, and it's a really good idea to accept

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Speaker 1: that help.

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Speaker 3: So the TikTok In particular, what she's talking about is

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Speaker 3: a studied psychological phenomenon called the Ben Franklin effect. The

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Speaker 3: Ben Franklin effect is the idea that people like you

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Speaker 3: more when they do you a favor. So it's like

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Speaker 3: a psychological trick.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 3: I walk into work and I say, am, I am

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Speaker 3: running so late. I've got this segment that I meant

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Speaker 3: to prepare for. Can you just write me a few notes?

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Speaker 3: They wonder if it's because of cognitive dissonance, which is,

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Speaker 3: if you're sitting at your desk doing my notes for me,

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Speaker 3: then you're thinking, I must really like Jesse, Like, if

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Speaker 3: I'm doing this, I must really like her.

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Speaker 2: Can I say I must really like Jesse while also

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Speaker 2: saying God, this lazy bitch.

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Speaker 3: Well, that's the thing is, I think we all assume

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Speaker 3: that people are going to resent us because we've asked

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Speaker 3: them to do a favor.

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Speaker 1: Surely, resentment kicks in after a certain.

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Speaker 3: Pouse, exactly after a certain inflection point, but generally speaking.

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Speaker 1: That inflection point's called married.

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Speaker 3: We really enjoy doing favors for each other. People really

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Speaker 3: enjoy it. They like feeling helpful. There's also something called

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Speaker 3: reciprocity of liking is what the phenomenon's called. And basically,

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Speaker 3: if mea thinks I like her, then she's more likely

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Speaker 3: to like me. And when you ask someone for a favor,

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Speaker 3: often it suggests that they like you.

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Speaker 1: So it's an intimacy.

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Speaker 3: It's a real level of trust.

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Speaker 1: It is. And what I thought was amazing about both

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Speaker 1: the essay by Maser and this TikTok by Amelia was

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Speaker 1: this idea of how capitalism is robbing us of this,

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Speaker 1: how we've commoditized community air Tasker to Uber, to Amazon,

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Speaker 1: to all of these enormous corporations, and so we've stopped

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Speaker 1: asking each other for favors, and we've stopped offering to

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Speaker 1: do things for other people. Yeah, even making a meal.

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Speaker 1: We now can just go and buy something.

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Speaker 2: I wonder if the essay is less about capitalism but

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Speaker 2: more about just how society has changed in the way

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Speaker 2: where at a point we used to be embarrassed for

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Speaker 2: having to cancel plans or not want to go out

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Speaker 2: and not want to see people, and now it's just

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Speaker 2: so common to accept an excuse like, Hey, I'm actually

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Speaker 2: feeling really really tired, do you mind if I just

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Speaker 2: stay home today? Like people are just being so so

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Speaker 2: honest to why they don't want to go out.

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Speaker 1: But don't you think that that has been I'm going

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Speaker 1: to say selfishness in air quotes. But this idea of

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Speaker 1: putting yourself first always has become this moral high ground,

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Speaker 1: as if by putting myself first, I'm actually doing something

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Speaker 1: really great.

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Speaker 4: As a person.

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Speaker 2: If you're going to do that exactly what you said

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Speaker 2: before me, and when you do it over and over again,

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Speaker 2: because it's good to put yourself first, but that means

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Speaker 2: you're putting someone else last, and it's usually the person

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Speaker 2: that you're either canceling on or you said you're going

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Speaker 2: to make plans with and you don't want to see anymore.

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Speaker 2: I feel like everyone will have a person in their

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Speaker 2: life who they used to be friends with, and then

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Speaker 2: the same person will just cancel and cancel and cancel,

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Speaker 2: and you might keep inviting them out again, but you're

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Speaker 2: less likely to coming to the wedding example, you're less

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Speaker 2: likely to lean on them for help because you're so

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Speaker 2: scared that they're going to cancel on you and not

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Speaker 2: show up, you're less likely to If you have an

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Speaker 2: extra ticket to an event, you're less likely to invite

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Speaker 2: them because it's also that same fear of constant rejection

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Speaker 2: you're getting from a person. And I think it also

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Speaker 2: comes down to when you are canceling plans and like

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Speaker 2: the essays said, you will cancel and you'll stay at

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Speaker 2: home and either doom scroll TikTok, or you'll just watch

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Speaker 2: the TV show and repeat. If you are still living

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Speaker 2: with other people, like if you live with a partner,

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Speaker 2: or you have pets, or you have kids, or you

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Speaker 2: have housemates, you're still inadvertently getting that sense of community.

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Speaker 2: The person who's not getting that sense of the community

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Speaker 2: is a person who lives alone that you could have

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Speaker 2: canceled on. And this is something that I've had to

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Speaker 2: go over and over in my head because I do

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Speaker 2: live alone. Around twenty eight percent of the Australian population

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Speaker 2: lives alone, and it's more common for people who live

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Speaker 2: alone to have depression. That for me, whenever I cancel

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Speaker 2: plans because I want to be alone at home, it's

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Speaker 2: a signal for me that I'm going into that depressive state,

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Speaker 2: especially if I repeat it over and over again. And

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Speaker 2: whenever someone cancel plans on me constantly to hang out

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Speaker 2: by themselves at home, even though they might be with

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Speaker 2: other people that they live with, they don't realize that

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Speaker 2: I don't have that sense of community, and I actually

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Speaker 2: need to physically keep going to achieve that and find that.

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Speaker 3: That's so true because we're also not very good at

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Speaker 3: knowing or predicting what will make us happy. So I've

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Speaker 3: talked before. I remember we did a no Filter probably

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Speaker 3: two years ago now Maya, where I spoke about depression

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Speaker 3: and how the nature of depression is that you feel

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Speaker 3: pulled towards doing things that are going to make you

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Speaker 3: more unhappy. And people in my family who who the

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Speaker 3: truth depression for a long time say the trick is

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Speaker 3: doing the opposite of what you feel like doing. So

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Speaker 3: if you feel like laying in bed all day, get up.

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Speaker 3: If you don't feel like eating, eat that sort of thing.

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Speaker 3: And so when we sit at home and we think

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Speaker 3: I really don't want to go out, I think I'm

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Speaker 3: gonna put myself first or whatever that language is, then

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Speaker 3: often that's just going to lead to us feeling worse.

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Speaker 3: And I don't think that any of this is because

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Speaker 3: you're a bitch. That's the one thing that I kind

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Speaker 3: of took issue. I know that it's a really great headliner.

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Speaker 3: I don't think anyone is a bitch. Well, I do.

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Speaker 3: I could probably name a few bitches, but not generally.

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Speaker 3: I just think we live in a culture that privileges

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Speaker 3: self reliance and independence, and any studies that are done

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Speaker 3: on cultures that have more of a collectivist approach and

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Speaker 3: understand themselves to be part of a whole, they approach

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Speaker 3: it really differently. They do feel more comfortable asking for favors,

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Speaker 3: and there's often greater satisfaction and happiness because we don't

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Speaker 3: feel so isolated.

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Speaker 1: I have never had a plan that I didn't want

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Speaker 1: to cancel. I've never had a holiday that I didn't

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Speaker 1: want to cancel or come home early from like almost never.

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Speaker 1: And I wonder if it's a symptom. Particularly lately, I've

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Speaker 1: found myself more and more shut in, and I wonder

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Speaker 1: if there's it's probably no coincidence that the world feels

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Speaker 1: very scary at the moment, both from a big picture

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00:15:06,542 --> 00:15:10,382
Speaker 1: sort of geopolitical sense and wars and what's going on

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Speaker 1: in Gaza and Israel and Iran and everything, and just

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Speaker 1: also there's the general situation around America and Trump and

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Speaker 1: the way he's turned the world into chaos. But also

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Speaker 1: closer to home, I've experienced some sort of a lot

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Speaker 1: of scrutiny and attention lately, and sometimes everything feels quite unsafe,

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Speaker 1: so I want to just stay home. It's like my

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Speaker 1: body goes into fight or flight and it's like it's

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Speaker 1: not safe out there. Just stay home, just stay contained

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Speaker 1: in a small space. But when I do push myself

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Speaker 1: to go out, I always I am so glad that I did.

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Speaker 3: And the question is what you then do when you

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Speaker 3: are at home alone, is pick up the phone and

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Speaker 3: look at things that are going to reinforce the sense.

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Speaker 1: It's not like I sit home and meditate or look

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Speaker 1: at the garden, or read a book or enrich myself.

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Speaker 1: You're right, I end up doom scrolling and perpetuating. Well,

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Speaker 1: I do perpetuate this fight or flight response.

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Speaker 3: Do you think as well that we're addicted, quite literally

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Speaker 3: addicted to convenience. So what we were saying before about

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Speaker 3: you don't have milk, I'll jump onto an app. You

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Speaker 3: can get it in fifteen minutes. This is if you

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Speaker 3: live in cities there's a lot of listeners who don't

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Speaker 3: have that. But even like addicted to the control of

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Speaker 3: knowing what the weather's going to be tomorrow, all that

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Speaker 3: kind of stuff.

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Speaker 1: Our muscle for dealing with inconvenience or discomfort or delayed gratification.

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Speaker 1: So we is so flabby.

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Speaker 3: So I have someone who's very close to being and

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Speaker 3: I will say, hey, I want to go visit this

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Speaker 3: friend over the weekend, and this person will go, oh,

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Speaker 3: abo's thirty minutes in the car. That's inconvenient. And I

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Speaker 3: keep saying relationships are inconvenience.

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Speaker 1: That's all out.

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Speaker 3: They are incredibly inconvenient. And a relationship built just on

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Speaker 3: mutual convenience isn't really a relationship with any depth. There

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Speaker 3: was a great line in that article that was as

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Speaker 3: if connection isn't made of small, tiring and glamorous acts,

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Speaker 3: And that's so true. It's like you've got yourself out.

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Speaker 1: Inconvenience is the tax that you pay for community and relationship, right,

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00:17:05,862 --> 00:17:10,182
Speaker 1: whether it's friendship or whatever. If you're never ever doing

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Speaker 1: something that makes you uncomfortable or inconvenienced, you may as

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Speaker 1: well just live in solitary confinement.

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Speaker 4: Surely, it's also.

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Speaker 2: Like really sad that it always comes with an element

387
00:17:20,022 --> 00:17:22,861
Speaker 2: of surprise when someone does want to do something for you,

388
00:17:22,942 --> 00:17:26,101
Speaker 2: like yeah, with weddings and funerals, like you're always so shocked,

389
00:17:26,101 --> 00:17:28,381
Speaker 2: like I can't believe she sent so many flowers. I

390
00:17:28,422 --> 00:17:30,701
Speaker 2: can't believe she just took over the booklet and the

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Speaker 2: planning and everything, when sometimes I'm just like, that should

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Speaker 2: be a given.

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Speaker 1: Do you know that the people in your life should

394
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Speaker 1: be doing research around this? People dramatically underestimate others' willingness

395
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Speaker 1: to help exactly what you say, by as much as

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Speaker 1: fifty percent.

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Speaker 4: That seems like a lot.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And we always overestimate how inconvenient a requests will be. Fathers.

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Speaker 3: I have a friend who just had a baby, and

400
00:17:52,542 --> 00:17:54,302
Speaker 3: she had a commitment that she had to do, and

401
00:17:54,341 --> 00:17:56,462
Speaker 3: she messaged me and said, is there any way they'd

402
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Speaker 3: come around and just hold the baby for an hour?

403
00:17:58,621 --> 00:18:02,502
Speaker 3: I was so excited because I was so desperate to

404
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Speaker 3: help her, and I'd been doing the thing you're not

405
00:18:04,422 --> 00:18:06,182
Speaker 3: meant to do, which is how can I help? Because

406
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Speaker 3: I didn't know. I know sometimes you can put your

407
00:18:07,782 --> 00:18:09,981
Speaker 3: foot in it, but I was like, I'm actually desperate

408
00:18:09,982 --> 00:18:11,702
Speaker 3: to do that for you, and I will feel closer

409
00:18:11,821 --> 00:18:12,861
Speaker 3: to you at the end of Yeah.

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00:18:12,982 --> 00:18:15,861
Speaker 1: Yeah, what's hard though. Also, I know we talk a

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Speaker 1: lot about askers and guesses when you factor that in

412
00:18:19,542 --> 00:18:21,502
Speaker 1: and askers and guesses, and asker is someone who asks

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Speaker 1: for what they want, and a guesser is someone who

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00:18:23,022 --> 00:18:26,342
Speaker 1: wants you to guess what they want. And sometimes that

415
00:18:26,381 --> 00:18:30,302
Speaker 1: can be challenging because it doesn't occur to a guesser

416
00:18:30,462 --> 00:18:33,061
Speaker 1: to ask what someone else would want, and it doesn't

417
00:18:33,141 --> 00:18:35,421
Speaker 1: occur to an asker to have to guess.

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00:18:35,621 --> 00:18:38,022
Speaker 3: Yeah, they're walking around going, well, what do you want

419
00:18:38,022 --> 00:18:38,262
Speaker 3: from me?

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00:18:38,742 --> 00:18:40,662
Speaker 1: So that's why you've got an one pretty well. Like Jesse,

421
00:18:40,702 --> 00:18:43,742
Speaker 1: I know that you're a guesser, so I don't ask

422
00:18:43,821 --> 00:18:45,901
Speaker 1: you what you want. This could come across as an

423
00:18:45,942 --> 00:18:48,061
Speaker 1: imposition I just do things.

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Speaker 3: Send me links to what Luna for her bathday?

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00:18:51,581 --> 00:18:53,742
Speaker 2: You make yourself a guesser because you know, Jessie.

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00:18:53,861 --> 00:18:56,581
Speaker 1: No, I just I don't wait to be asked that.

427
00:18:57,302 --> 00:18:59,302
Speaker 1: I don't wait to be asked because I think that

428
00:18:59,381 --> 00:19:01,462
Speaker 1: you can kid yourself and go, oh, they haven't asked,

429
00:19:01,782 --> 00:19:03,222
Speaker 1: therefore they don't need anything.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, And I.

431
00:19:05,302 --> 00:19:08,461
Speaker 2: Also think love languages come into this as well, like,

432
00:19:08,502 --> 00:19:10,821
Speaker 2: for example, I have a friend who was really sick

433
00:19:10,901 --> 00:19:14,181
Speaker 2: and she was in hospital, and my love language is gifting, Like,

434
00:19:14,262 --> 00:19:16,422
Speaker 2: I think the best thing I could do is sent

435
00:19:16,462 --> 00:19:19,861
Speaker 2: her flowers, And then I remember that her love language

436
00:19:19,942 --> 00:19:22,941
Speaker 2: is acts of service, So for her, she's probably like,

437
00:19:23,222 --> 00:19:23,742
Speaker 2: just help.

438
00:19:23,581 --> 00:19:27,382
Speaker 4: Me go to the bathroom. I don't know what to.

439
00:19:27,302 --> 00:19:30,182
Speaker 1: Deal with your shitty flower. Then my question is, what's

440
00:19:30,182 --> 00:19:33,061
Speaker 1: the difference between paying someone to go and clean your

441
00:19:33,101 --> 00:19:37,101
Speaker 1: house or paying for a meal to be delivered versus

442
00:19:37,222 --> 00:19:40,701
Speaker 1: making the meal yourself, or going over and stacking her

443
00:19:40,782 --> 00:19:44,181
Speaker 1: dish washer and vacuuming her house yourself. How would you

444
00:19:44,222 --> 00:19:49,661
Speaker 1: feel differently if Sam I sent over a voucher for

445
00:19:49,702 --> 00:19:52,502
Speaker 1: a meal or got something delivered that I hadn't made,

446
00:19:53,182 --> 00:19:55,582
Speaker 1: or I made something myself. The end of the day

447
00:19:55,581 --> 00:19:58,902
Speaker 1: you're eating both ways, would you feel differently?

448
00:19:59,341 --> 00:20:01,982
Speaker 2: I would feel differently, which is kind of shitty because

449
00:20:02,022 --> 00:20:03,661
Speaker 2: I think it's like kind of this, you're doing the

450
00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:06,302
Speaker 2: same thing essentially. But I also think it comes down

451
00:20:06,341 --> 00:20:08,341
Speaker 2: when in your head you're seeing how much time that

452
00:20:08,381 --> 00:20:11,981
Speaker 2: person put into it. We're dinner voucher such a beautiful gift,

453
00:20:12,101 --> 00:20:14,341
Speaker 2: But at the same time, if you had made something

454
00:20:14,381 --> 00:20:16,142
Speaker 2: and given it to me, I'm like, she went up

455
00:20:16,182 --> 00:20:18,581
Speaker 2: and bought the grocery, she spent time in the kitchen,

456
00:20:18,621 --> 00:20:20,461
Speaker 2: she spent time driving to my house to give it

457
00:20:20,502 --> 00:20:22,142
Speaker 2: to me. If you're at my house, you might also

458
00:20:22,222 --> 00:20:24,821
Speaker 2: help me clean and serve me. Like it's the extra

459
00:20:24,901 --> 00:20:27,221
Speaker 2: little things I feel like in your head makes it

460
00:20:27,262 --> 00:20:29,462
Speaker 2: feel like it's more, And it kind of is more

461
00:20:29,502 --> 00:20:30,181
Speaker 2: if you think about it.

462
00:20:30,302 --> 00:20:33,101
Speaker 1: It's back to that inconvenience, right, It's the inconvenience that

463
00:20:33,182 --> 00:20:34,542
Speaker 1: says to someone you matter.

464
00:20:34,982 --> 00:20:38,862
Speaker 3: It's also existing in a productivity kind of centered society

465
00:20:38,901 --> 00:20:41,381
Speaker 3: and also an outcome centered society where it's like whatever

466
00:20:41,422 --> 00:20:43,821
Speaker 3: the outcome or the results or the thing that sits

467
00:20:43,861 --> 00:20:45,741
Speaker 3: on the table, it's like, we don't even want to

468
00:20:45,742 --> 00:20:48,581
Speaker 3: think about kind of I've had this argument with a

469
00:20:48,581 --> 00:20:50,741
Speaker 3: friend too about whether it's the thought that counts, and

470
00:20:50,782 --> 00:20:52,222
Speaker 3: I'm like, I actually think all of the thought and

471
00:20:52,262 --> 00:20:54,101
Speaker 3: all of the effort does count for a lot, But

472
00:20:54,182 --> 00:20:56,462
Speaker 3: sometimes I don't think it's seen that way. Recently, there

473
00:20:56,462 --> 00:20:59,061
Speaker 3: was someone in our community who was sick and they

474
00:20:59,182 --> 00:21:00,861
Speaker 3: cooked all day and went and dropped off food, and

475
00:21:00,901 --> 00:21:03,421
Speaker 3: I was like, what, Like it didn't even occur. I

476
00:21:03,462 --> 00:21:05,181
Speaker 3: would do the dinner ladies about her. That's what I

477
00:21:05,182 --> 00:21:07,222
Speaker 3: do mostly because I can't cook, and I wouldn't put

478
00:21:07,262 --> 00:21:07,621
Speaker 3: that off it.

479
00:21:07,661 --> 00:21:10,221
Speaker 1: Maybe you could write them some You could write poem.

480
00:21:10,462 --> 00:21:13,381
Speaker 1: You could write a poem because cooking is not something

481
00:21:13,381 --> 00:21:15,222
Speaker 1: that you're good at, the same with me, like I

482
00:21:15,262 --> 00:21:17,582
Speaker 1: would not burden someone by cooking.

483
00:21:17,742 --> 00:21:23,341
Speaker 3: So the conclusion is, write more poems out louders in

484
00:21:23,381 --> 00:21:25,621
Speaker 3: a moment. Have you ever turned up to an open

485
00:21:25,661 --> 00:21:28,382
Speaker 3: house or inspection and it looks nothing like the photos?

486
00:21:28,581 --> 00:21:31,502
Speaker 3: You're not imagining it. We unpack the trick being used

487
00:21:31,542 --> 00:21:38,702
Speaker 3: to lure renters, and we've got recommendations coming up. You're

488
00:21:38,742 --> 00:21:42,141
Speaker 3: scrolling through potential properties, either to rent or to buy

489
00:21:42,341 --> 00:21:46,702
Speaker 3: right and you look at just a stunning property. We're

490
00:21:46,742 --> 00:21:50,741
Speaker 3: talking stunning light. That living room looks very spacious, the

491
00:21:50,821 --> 00:21:52,141
Speaker 3: carpet so soft.

492
00:21:52,222 --> 00:21:53,182
Speaker 4: So I can't afford it.

493
00:21:53,222 --> 00:21:57,102
Speaker 3: No, you definitely can't to it. Goodness, both bedrooms fit

494
00:21:57,141 --> 00:22:00,742
Speaker 3: a double bed. Can you even imagine luxury? There's even

495
00:22:00,782 --> 00:22:03,101
Speaker 3: a fireplace. Look, it's burning in the corner fireplace.

496
00:22:07,061 --> 00:22:07,661
Speaker 1: It's on the bottom.

497
00:22:07,982 --> 00:22:08,741
Speaker 3: Can you even believe it?

498
00:22:08,782 --> 00:22:10,982
Speaker 1: There's a fire peer that's crazy.

499
00:22:11,341 --> 00:22:12,262
Speaker 4: Where's it going?

500
00:22:12,381 --> 00:22:16,462
Speaker 3: No one asked questions. I'm going to register for an inspection.

501
00:22:16,982 --> 00:22:19,341
Speaker 3: But then you get there, there's only one window and

502
00:22:19,381 --> 00:22:21,422
Speaker 3: it looks like something out of a jail cell. Oh no,

503
00:22:21,581 --> 00:22:23,662
Speaker 3: you can touch both walls while standing in the center

504
00:22:23,661 --> 00:22:26,421
Speaker 3: of sor then the carpet is actually a rug and

505
00:22:26,462 --> 00:22:28,262
Speaker 3: that belongs to the owners and they'll be taking it back.

506
00:22:29,061 --> 00:22:32,861
Speaker 3: That second bedroom it might only fit a kid's single

507
00:22:33,502 --> 00:22:36,421
Speaker 3: trundle bed, and the fireplace is actually a hole in

508
00:22:36,462 --> 00:22:37,901
Speaker 3: the wall left by the previous tenant.

509
00:22:38,141 --> 00:22:40,902
Speaker 2: It had a very raging note what happened.

510
00:22:41,502 --> 00:22:44,901
Speaker 3: What happened is AI Like, if you have a sense

511
00:22:45,262 --> 00:22:47,982
Speaker 3: that you're being personally victimized by the marketing of real

512
00:22:48,101 --> 00:22:52,222
Speaker 3: estate agents, you are not imagining it. I have personally

513
00:22:52,742 --> 00:22:55,221
Speaker 3: been to that inspection where I go, this is simply

514
00:22:55,262 --> 00:22:57,061
Speaker 3: not what I saw online. I'm being you know what

515
00:22:57,101 --> 00:22:59,502
Speaker 3: I'm being I'm being gasolate lit. I'm being gas lit

516
00:22:59,782 --> 00:23:02,701
Speaker 3: by real estate agents, by the fake fire and there

517
00:23:02,702 --> 00:23:05,622
Speaker 3: are currently calls for an Australian wide crackdown on real

518
00:23:05,702 --> 00:23:08,102
Speaker 3: estate ads that use AI. So the New South Wales

519
00:23:08,302 --> 00:23:11,982
Speaker 3: state government has cited examples of real estate agents using

520
00:23:12,022 --> 00:23:15,141
Speaker 3: AI generated furniture that showed a double bed in a

521
00:23:15,222 --> 00:23:17,941
Speaker 3: room that could literally only fit a single bed and

522
00:23:18,061 --> 00:23:21,661
Speaker 3: modifying photos to obscure property damage. It is not that

523
00:23:21,861 --> 00:23:26,461
Speaker 3: unusual for them to put a fire like an actual

524
00:23:26,542 --> 00:23:29,022
Speaker 3: like lip fire in a fireplace that either doesn't work

525
00:23:29,262 --> 00:23:31,821
Speaker 3: like isn't functional, and it's just literally like an AI

526
00:23:31,901 --> 00:23:34,461
Speaker 3: generated image stuck in there. And for a long time

527
00:23:34,502 --> 00:23:37,462
Speaker 3: they've been allowed to do that. Is anyone else finding

528
00:23:37,502 --> 00:23:40,461
Speaker 3: themselves increasingly tricked by AI? I thought I was savvy,

529
00:23:40,861 --> 00:23:42,141
Speaker 3: and I no longer feel savvy.

530
00:23:42,222 --> 00:23:45,582
Speaker 1: This really surprised me to hear, because of course, now

531
00:23:45,581 --> 00:23:48,341
Speaker 1: that you say it, I can see it. But about

532
00:23:48,381 --> 00:23:51,022
Speaker 1: fifteen years ago, I was the chair of the then

533
00:23:51,061 --> 00:23:55,581
Speaker 1: federal government's National Body Image Advisory Board, and we were

534
00:23:55,782 --> 00:23:58,261
Speaker 1: tasked by the government at looking at a whole lot

535
00:23:58,262 --> 00:24:01,502
Speaker 1: of things that we could do, guidelines and initiatives for

536
00:24:01,581 --> 00:24:05,141
Speaker 1: the fashion industry, the advertising industry, the media industry that

537
00:24:05,182 --> 00:24:08,782
Speaker 1: would improve body image. And one of the things that

538
00:24:08,901 --> 00:24:13,422
Speaker 1: we proposed was that there be mandatory declaration when images

539
00:24:13,422 --> 00:24:16,262
Speaker 1: had been photo shopped, because you know, back in the day,

540
00:24:16,702 --> 00:24:20,181
Speaker 1: now it's of course pandemic, but magazine covers and magazine

541
00:24:20,222 --> 00:24:23,982
Speaker 1: images and advertising images had always been retouched. You didn't

542
00:24:24,022 --> 00:24:26,461
Speaker 1: have to declare it. And at the time it was

543
00:24:26,542 --> 00:24:29,662
Speaker 1: compared to someone made the point that with real estate images,

544
00:24:30,462 --> 00:24:35,462
Speaker 1: if you show like a view of Bondai Beach and

545
00:24:36,022 --> 00:24:38,462
Speaker 1: there's not an actual view, but it just is in

546
00:24:41,061 --> 00:24:42,861
Speaker 1: you used to have to have a discrimus saying not

547
00:24:42,982 --> 00:24:46,502
Speaker 1: actual view. Really Yeah, so there was that was really

548
00:24:46,502 --> 00:24:49,141
Speaker 1: strict around truth in advertising. The reason I brought that

549
00:24:49,222 --> 00:24:51,341
Speaker 1: up is that we made the point that it was

550
00:24:51,742 --> 00:24:53,901
Speaker 1: absurd that you could have a picture of a human

551
00:24:54,381 --> 00:24:56,781
Speaker 1: but you didn't have to say not actual human. It

552
00:24:56,821 --> 00:25:00,182
Speaker 1: was created essentially by photoshop, which is a version of AI.

553
00:25:00,982 --> 00:25:04,542
Speaker 1: So I'm so surprised that all of those things have

554
00:25:04,861 --> 00:25:08,141
Speaker 1: I think probably industries just haven't caught up with technology,

555
00:25:08,341 --> 00:25:09,502
Speaker 1: haven't caught up with AI.

556
00:25:09,581 --> 00:25:12,181
Speaker 3: You're talking about. It sounds so archaic that you would

557
00:25:12,182 --> 00:25:17,742
Speaker 3: have to declare because now I imagery is totally ubiquitous.

558
00:25:17,821 --> 00:25:22,622
Speaker 3: You'll see aiimage that's allegedly from a war zone, or

559
00:25:22,661 --> 00:25:25,302
Speaker 3: an AI image of Donald Trump doing something he simply

560
00:25:25,381 --> 00:25:28,061
Speaker 3: did not do, like that's everywhere. And what that does

561
00:25:28,141 --> 00:25:29,981
Speaker 3: to the human race when you can't look at an

562
00:25:29,982 --> 00:25:32,181
Speaker 3: image and trust it is something I don't like to

563
00:25:32,182 --> 00:25:33,022
Speaker 3: think about too much.

564
00:25:33,101 --> 00:25:35,621
Speaker 2: I wonder if it's also because especially with rents. We

565
00:25:35,661 --> 00:25:39,262
Speaker 2: are in a rental crisis right now. People are desperate

566
00:25:39,861 --> 00:25:43,061
Speaker 2: to find somewhere to live. And I wonder if it's

567
00:25:43,182 --> 00:25:45,981
Speaker 2: just real estate going well, people will come no matter what.

568
00:25:46,222 --> 00:25:48,861
Speaker 2: So what's the point of doing all this extra legwork

569
00:25:48,942 --> 00:25:50,701
Speaker 2: when we just know there'll be hordes of lines for

570
00:25:50,742 --> 00:25:51,621
Speaker 2: people to see this place?

571
00:25:51,661 --> 00:25:54,621
Speaker 3: Well, the argument is that what you're essentially doing is

572
00:25:54,661 --> 00:25:57,461
Speaker 3: like you're really wasting people's time. So if someone is

573
00:25:57,462 --> 00:25:59,621
Speaker 3: in and I've been in this position between rental properties

574
00:25:59,621 --> 00:26:01,142
Speaker 3: where I've been kicked out of A and I need

575
00:26:01,182 --> 00:26:03,782
Speaker 3: to move into B, there's only so many properties I

576
00:26:03,821 --> 00:26:06,381
Speaker 3: can visit. And I was the person who I was

577
00:26:06,381 --> 00:26:08,861
Speaker 3: in a room clearing my sister and her boyfriend were

578
00:26:08,861 --> 00:26:10,981
Speaker 3: in a room. Did two rooms that could have humans

579
00:26:10,982 --> 00:26:11,221
Speaker 3: in them?

580
00:26:11,381 --> 00:26:11,621
Speaker 1: Right?

581
00:26:11,901 --> 00:26:15,901
Speaker 3: And so you'd go and say this place is unlivable.

582
00:26:15,462 --> 00:26:17,861
Speaker 1: For two bed yas, you've wasted our time.

583
00:26:17,942 --> 00:26:19,622
Speaker 3: Yeah, you've wasted our time when I could have gone

584
00:26:19,621 --> 00:26:22,902
Speaker 3: and seen this property that actually offers me somewhat what

585
00:26:22,942 --> 00:26:25,142
Speaker 3: I want. So I think that that's the crackdown too,

586
00:26:25,262 --> 00:26:28,061
Speaker 3: is just going You can't do that to people. It's

587
00:26:28,061 --> 00:26:29,262
Speaker 3: incredibly manipulative.

588
00:26:29,702 --> 00:26:30,662
Speaker 1: Have you been tricked by.

589
00:26:30,581 --> 00:26:33,461
Speaker 2: AO Okay, look, I wasn't gonna bring this up, but

590
00:26:34,621 --> 00:26:36,542
Speaker 2: this only happened a few weeks ago, which makes me

591
00:26:36,702 --> 00:26:37,621
Speaker 2: even more shameful.

592
00:26:37,821 --> 00:26:38,222
Speaker 4: I was on.

593
00:26:38,182 --> 00:26:41,861
Speaker 2: TikTok and I was watching this video and it was

594
00:26:41,861 --> 00:26:44,981
Speaker 2: one of those like mini documentary videos about this really

595
00:26:45,222 --> 00:26:48,302
Speaker 2: rare fish that these fishermen found, and it was like

596
00:26:48,302 --> 00:26:50,022
Speaker 2: this huge, huge I think it was like a five

597
00:26:50,061 --> 00:26:53,341
Speaker 2: minute video. Entire video was generated by AI. I sat

598
00:26:53,381 --> 00:26:54,341
Speaker 2: there and watched it for five minutes.

599
00:26:54,381 --> 00:26:56,262
Speaker 1: Did it have when you looked in the captions? Did

600
00:26:56,302 --> 00:26:59,341
Speaker 1: it have an AI hashtage? That happened to me? I

601
00:26:59,381 --> 00:27:01,542
Speaker 1: watched a funny video last night and it was like

602
00:27:01,621 --> 00:27:03,821
Speaker 1: this woman getting sort of eaten by her couch and

603
00:27:03,982 --> 00:27:06,581
Speaker 1: this thing, and I was like, this is amazing, and

604
00:27:06,621 --> 00:27:09,742
Speaker 1: I showed my kids and they're like, d No, I

605
00:27:09,782 --> 00:27:10,582
Speaker 1: don't think it is.

606
00:27:10,742 --> 00:27:12,221
Speaker 3: I think I Cash really did eat her.

607
00:27:12,341 --> 00:27:13,701
Speaker 4: Yeah.

608
00:27:13,782 --> 00:27:15,341
Speaker 2: One of the girls in our office is some pointing

609
00:27:15,341 --> 00:27:18,581
Speaker 2: around the spot. She went to get a really drastic haircut,

610
00:27:18,901 --> 00:27:20,581
Speaker 2: like one of those like long hair to a bob.

611
00:27:20,861 --> 00:27:22,022
Speaker 2: She went to a hair dress and she's like, I

612
00:27:22,101 --> 00:27:24,061
Speaker 2: want something like this, and he was like, babe, that's

613
00:27:24,101 --> 00:27:24,901
Speaker 2: not a real person.

614
00:27:25,661 --> 00:27:28,342
Speaker 4: Hair doesn't flow much hairdressers.

615
00:27:28,502 --> 00:27:31,261
Speaker 1: This is a real problem for hairdressers. People are rocking up,

616
00:27:31,302 --> 00:27:34,142
Speaker 1: not just with shots of celebrities that look nothing like them.

617
00:27:34,182 --> 00:27:36,702
Speaker 1: And Holly won't mind me telling the story of her,

618
00:27:36,782 --> 00:27:39,061
Speaker 1: and I think me who went with photos of l

619
00:27:39,542 --> 00:27:41,662
Speaker 1: Lara Bingle as she was then said we just want

620
00:27:41,702 --> 00:27:44,022
Speaker 1: to look like this or Gwyneth Paltrow and sliding doors.

621
00:27:44,022 --> 00:27:46,101
Speaker 1: I just want this pixie cut. And I mean, that's

622
00:27:46,101 --> 00:27:49,101
Speaker 1: one thing, but now people are showing hair that doesn't

623
00:27:49,141 --> 00:27:50,702
Speaker 1: exist and saying I want that hair.

624
00:27:52,742 --> 00:27:55,982
Speaker 2: After the break, we have some recommendations for you, including

625
00:27:55,982 --> 00:27:59,502
Speaker 2: something to watch, a new discovery, and something smelly for

626
00:27:59,581 --> 00:28:00,141
Speaker 2: your body.

627
00:28:00,821 --> 00:28:04,101
Speaker 3: Every Tuesday and Thursday we drop new segments of Mummy

628
00:28:04,101 --> 00:28:07,461
Speaker 3: Are Out Loud just for Mummy A subscribers. Follow the

629
00:28:07,462 --> 00:28:09,542
Speaker 3: link in the show notes to get your daily Joseph

630
00:28:09,621 --> 00:28:12,102
Speaker 3: out Loud and a big thank you to all our

631
00:28:12,141 --> 00:28:13,462
Speaker 3: current subscribers.

632
00:28:19,022 --> 00:28:22,941
Speaker 5: Vibes ideas atmosphere, something casual, something fun.

633
00:28:23,462 --> 00:28:24,982
Speaker 1: This is my best recommendation.

634
00:28:26,101 --> 00:28:28,181
Speaker 2: Okay, it is Friday and we want to help you

635
00:28:28,222 --> 00:28:31,302
Speaker 2: set up your weekend with our very best recommendations.

636
00:28:31,462 --> 00:28:32,821
Speaker 4: Mia, do you want to get first?

637
00:28:32,942 --> 00:28:36,662
Speaker 1: I have been plummeted back into the world of children's

638
00:28:36,742 --> 00:28:40,382
Speaker 1: entertainers and videos. Now that Luna is almost two and

639
00:28:40,422 --> 00:28:43,662
Speaker 1: she's allowed a little bit of screen time, we're having

640
00:28:43,702 --> 00:28:46,461
Speaker 1: a little bit of screen time. So I am back

641
00:28:46,622 --> 00:28:48,502
Speaker 1: in the Wiggles. Gosh, the wiggles have changed.

642
00:28:48,742 --> 00:28:50,142
Speaker 4: Yeah, there's so many of them now.

643
00:28:50,302 --> 00:28:53,702
Speaker 1: There's one of the yes, one of them is very buff.

644
00:28:54,262 --> 00:28:57,461
Speaker 1: One of them is a magical tree that dances like

645
00:28:57,502 --> 00:28:59,422
Speaker 1: he's in a rave and I'm obsessed with him.

646
00:28:59,542 --> 00:29:02,342
Speaker 3: I bet you don't know that he's married to Dorothy.

647
00:29:03,142 --> 00:29:05,021
Speaker 1: I've forgotten how much you love a bit of wiggles,

648
00:29:05,022 --> 00:29:08,782
Speaker 1: got them to gossip about. And Anthony, the blue Wiggle

649
00:29:09,102 --> 00:29:12,262
Speaker 1: of the he's still there. Queen Adam's daughter, Lucia, his daughter.

650
00:29:12,502 --> 00:29:17,022
Speaker 1: She the ballerina Neppo wiggle. Yes, yeah, she's also blue.

651
00:29:17,182 --> 00:29:19,622
Speaker 1: She's also the blue Wiggle. Well she has to actually beautiful.

652
00:29:19,702 --> 00:29:23,542
Speaker 1: It's a lovely thing anyway. Something that I've just learned

653
00:29:23,582 --> 00:29:27,941
Speaker 1: about a children's entertainer called Miss Rachel. She has a

654
00:29:27,982 --> 00:29:30,902
Speaker 1: YouTube channel. If you've got little kids, I'm sure you'll

655
00:29:31,062 --> 00:29:33,102
Speaker 1: have heard of Miss Rachel. But I learned about Miss

656
00:29:33,222 --> 00:29:36,062
Speaker 1: Rachel because I was listening to Jesse and Amelia talk

657
00:29:36,102 --> 00:29:40,502
Speaker 1: about her on parenting out loud last week. She's got

658
00:29:40,582 --> 00:29:44,021
Speaker 1: like fifteen million subscribers on YouTube, where there's about one

659
00:29:44,102 --> 00:29:47,342
Speaker 1: hundred and twenty free videos. Fifteen million subscribers.

660
00:29:47,382 --> 00:29:50,062
Speaker 3: They believe that she's the biggest children's entertainer in the world.

661
00:29:50,102 --> 00:29:52,022
Speaker 1: Oh, and she just records they're very low fight. She

662
00:29:52,062 --> 00:29:54,782
Speaker 1: records these videos in front of green screen in her laundroom.

663
00:29:54,822 --> 00:29:58,741
Speaker 1: I think she started Jesse because her son had speech delay,

664
00:29:59,142 --> 00:30:01,822
Speaker 1: and so she was making these videos. They're lovely because

665
00:30:01,862 --> 00:30:03,302
Speaker 1: one of the things, and one of the reasons that

666
00:30:03,342 --> 00:30:05,701
Speaker 1: you're not meant to have little kids watching screens too

667
00:30:05,782 --> 00:30:08,662
Speaker 1: much is the fast cuts. The way TV's made now.

668
00:30:08,661 --> 00:30:12,062
Speaker 1: It's very fast, a lot of movement, and it's hugely

669
00:30:12,102 --> 00:30:14,062
Speaker 1: stimulating and it can be hard for them to process.

670
00:30:14,062 --> 00:30:15,782
Speaker 4: This is very slow, So it's.

671
00:30:15,661 --> 00:30:16,782
Speaker 1: For babies and photography.

672
00:30:16,862 --> 00:30:19,142
Speaker 3: She sounds things out, which is really good for speech.

673
00:30:19,222 --> 00:30:20,582
Speaker 3: And have you ever heard of miss Rachel.

674
00:30:20,622 --> 00:30:22,502
Speaker 4: I've heard this name everywhere.

675
00:30:22,542 --> 00:30:23,262
Speaker 3: Do you know her face?

676
00:30:23,702 --> 00:30:25,221
Speaker 1: No, have a little listen.

677
00:30:25,342 --> 00:30:29,182
Speaker 3: Hi, Frabs, I'm so excited to learn about zoo animals

678
00:30:29,502 --> 00:30:31,662
Speaker 3: and chuckle animals with you today.

679
00:30:32,022 --> 00:30:35,622
Speaker 1: It's going to be so much fun. Can you do

680
00:30:35,742 --> 00:30:41,142
Speaker 1: this rhyme with me a tweet aor and oh whoa, whoa,

681
00:30:41,382 --> 00:30:45,022
Speaker 1: who's in the zoo planing big girl. What's interesting about

682
00:30:45,062 --> 00:30:46,701
Speaker 1: this story and why you were talking about it, is

683
00:30:46,742 --> 00:30:49,342
Speaker 1: that lately she's become the target of a lot of

684
00:30:49,942 --> 00:30:56,022
Speaker 1: pretty outrageous criticism for her advocacy of the children in Gaza,

685
00:30:56,062 --> 00:30:59,142
Speaker 1: and she's also spoken about her concern for the children

686
00:30:59,142 --> 00:31:02,142
Speaker 1: in Israel. But some people have said that she's been

687
00:31:02,182 --> 00:31:06,022
Speaker 1: being paid by Hamas and some pretty wild accusations.

688
00:31:06,302 --> 00:31:09,261
Speaker 3: So she's had to turn off all comments on Instagram

689
00:31:09,342 --> 00:31:11,582
Speaker 3: and YouTube because of the hate that she was getting,

690
00:31:11,622 --> 00:31:14,142
Speaker 3: and she came out and just basically said, no child

691
00:31:14,222 --> 00:31:18,182
Speaker 3: should have their crucial brain development interrupted by trauma. That's

692
00:31:18,262 --> 00:31:21,782
Speaker 3: what I believe. We had this really interesting discussion about

693
00:31:22,342 --> 00:31:27,142
Speaker 3: what it is about children's entertainers because of the intimacy

694
00:31:27,782 --> 00:31:30,862
Speaker 3: having them in your home, you know, often late at night,

695
00:31:30,902 --> 00:31:33,262
Speaker 3: the middle of the night, like people feel this kind

696
00:31:33,302 --> 00:31:37,662
Speaker 3: of ownership over her, like a a real parasocial relationship.

697
00:31:37,702 --> 00:31:39,942
Speaker 1: But is it also Jesse. I haven't watched too many

698
00:31:40,022 --> 00:31:42,302
Speaker 1: for videos, but it was it that people were objecting

699
00:31:42,462 --> 00:31:46,221
Speaker 1: to her talking about the plight of children in Gaza

700
00:31:46,862 --> 00:31:47,982
Speaker 1: to children.

701
00:31:47,822 --> 00:31:50,262
Speaker 3: No, that's what's interesting is over on Instagram where she's

702
00:31:50,262 --> 00:31:52,622
Speaker 3: got all these followers, that's where she will post and

703
00:31:52,661 --> 00:31:55,302
Speaker 3: she'll say, I, you know, want to look after these children.

704
00:31:55,102 --> 00:31:57,102
Speaker 1: Off and she's raising money because that's where the parents are.

705
00:31:56,982 --> 00:31:58,942
Speaker 3: Because that's where the parents are. Whereas on YouTube, which

706
00:31:58,982 --> 00:32:01,942
Speaker 3: is a totally different platform, she's going brushy teeth, can

707
00:32:01,982 --> 00:32:03,862
Speaker 3: you say, mama? Like? They're the kind of things that

708
00:32:03,902 --> 00:32:06,302
Speaker 3: she's doing. But it highlights to me, I think it's

709
00:32:06,302 --> 00:32:10,422
Speaker 3: such an interesting story. Is it highlights the different especially

710
00:32:10,502 --> 00:32:13,102
Speaker 3: in this crisis, about what someone says and what people

711
00:32:13,142 --> 00:32:16,382
Speaker 3: here are like. So she can say I really care

712
00:32:16,502 --> 00:32:20,302
Speaker 3: about the well being of children, and it might be

713
00:32:20,382 --> 00:32:22,982
Speaker 3: perceived by some in the community as being anti Semitic

714
00:32:22,982 --> 00:32:25,382
Speaker 3: because of where they are and what, you know, who

715
00:32:25,462 --> 00:32:28,022
Speaker 3: they see. Miss Rachel is standing alongside and it's just

716
00:32:28,102 --> 00:32:30,982
Speaker 3: this big, mucky mess. The New York Times has done

717
00:32:31,022 --> 00:32:34,022
Speaker 3: a brilliant profile on it, this whole story, which will

718
00:32:34,022 --> 00:32:35,822
Speaker 3: link to it in our show notes, because it's really

719
00:32:35,822 --> 00:32:38,422
Speaker 3: interesting and if you're a parent of a kid under

720
00:32:38,462 --> 00:32:40,701
Speaker 3: about five, you have heard Miss Rachel's voice.

721
00:32:40,902 --> 00:32:42,302
Speaker 4: Jesse, what do you have today?

722
00:32:42,502 --> 00:32:46,421
Speaker 3: I have a documentary which I'm really on the documentary train. Please,

723
00:32:46,422 --> 00:32:49,302
Speaker 3: there's not a single pooh in this documentary. There's a

724
00:32:49,342 --> 00:32:51,782
Speaker 3: series on Netflix called American man Hunt. They did one

725
00:32:51,822 --> 00:32:55,142
Speaker 3: on the Boston bomber and this new one which remember

726
00:32:55,182 --> 00:32:59,742
Speaker 3: I recommended Titan recently, and a bunch about louders slid

727
00:32:59,742 --> 00:33:02,102
Speaker 3: into my DMS and said, you have to watch American

728
00:33:02,142 --> 00:33:04,421
Speaker 3: man Hunt. Osama bin Lighten. You have to watch that

729
00:33:04,582 --> 00:33:06,542
Speaker 3: is just come out. You'll really enjoy it.

730
00:33:08,702 --> 00:33:11,262
Speaker 5: Where war, we will find those who did it and

731
00:33:11,302 --> 00:33:12,542
Speaker 5: we'll bring them to justice.

732
00:33:12,982 --> 00:33:16,022
Speaker 2: Call for Black chief of counter terrorism said, if you'll

733
00:33:16,062 --> 00:33:18,462
Speaker 2: let me do it, I'll have flies walking on their

734
00:33:18,502 --> 00:33:20,462
Speaker 2: eyeballs in six weeks.

735
00:33:21,422 --> 00:33:24,661
Speaker 1: That's what I'm talking about. I was working with the

736
00:33:24,742 --> 00:33:27,022
Speaker 1: representative from the FAA trying to.

737
00:33:27,022 --> 00:33:32,382
Speaker 4: Track some of the conspirators. We knew this was Masamo

738
00:33:32,422 --> 00:33:33,102
Speaker 4: bin Laden.

739
00:33:33,422 --> 00:33:36,701
Speaker 1: We were going to war full out against inn Lodon.

740
00:33:37,982 --> 00:33:40,302
Speaker 3: And the reason why is because so I was born

741
00:33:40,302 --> 00:33:43,102
Speaker 3: in nineteen ninety when September eleven happened, I would have

742
00:33:43,142 --> 00:33:47,662
Speaker 3: been eleven, and my whole adolescence the image of bin

743
00:33:47,742 --> 00:33:50,462
Speaker 3: Laden was like the villain, like he was such a bit.

744
00:33:50,502 --> 00:33:54,461
Speaker 3: He loomed so large in my kind of childhood adolescence

745
00:33:55,022 --> 00:33:58,222
Speaker 3: and what this documentary does is it tracks nine to

746
00:33:58,262 --> 00:34:02,661
Speaker 3: eleven and then the subsequent manhunt by the US Army

747
00:34:02,782 --> 00:34:05,422
Speaker 3: to try and find him. And I remembered parts of it,

748
00:34:05,862 --> 00:34:08,622
Speaker 3: but the details I completely missed. And because they're able

749
00:34:08,661 --> 00:34:12,302
Speaker 3: to get members of the CIA, this is Barack Obama's

750
00:34:12,462 --> 00:34:16,102
Speaker 3: speech writer, They're able to get the Navy seal who

751
00:34:16,222 --> 00:34:19,661
Speaker 3: actually found Bin Laden, like, they're able to interview all

752
00:34:19,701 --> 00:34:21,942
Speaker 3: of these people in a way that it puts it

753
00:34:21,942 --> 00:34:24,022
Speaker 3: in the context of history. There is a lot of

754
00:34:24,062 --> 00:34:26,102
Speaker 3: criticism from a lot of the people in the inside

755
00:34:26,181 --> 00:34:29,221
Speaker 3: ranks about Guantanamo and some of the lengths they went

756
00:34:29,261 --> 00:34:32,782
Speaker 3: to to quite literally torture people to try and get intel.

757
00:34:33,261 --> 00:34:36,102
Speaker 3: There are a lot of parallels with what's going on

758
00:34:36,462 --> 00:34:40,181
Speaker 3: at the moment, with the US claiming to have inverted

759
00:34:40,221 --> 00:34:43,502
Speaker 3: Commas achieved something that they have not achieved, and how

760
00:34:43,502 --> 00:34:47,822
Speaker 3: politics works in these kind of geopolitical moments. It is fascinating.

761
00:34:47,942 --> 00:34:50,182
Speaker 3: It is called American Manhunt O. Some have Bin Laden

762
00:34:50,221 --> 00:34:51,822
Speaker 3: and it is on Netflix.

763
00:34:51,542 --> 00:34:52,661
Speaker 1: And what are you recommending?

764
00:34:52,862 --> 00:34:55,502
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm putting my body out there for the greater

765
00:34:55,582 --> 00:34:58,341
Speaker 2: good because I have really.

766
00:34:58,062 --> 00:34:58,982
Speaker 4: Bad back me.

767
00:34:59,661 --> 00:35:00,902
Speaker 3: Oh, I've had that before.

768
00:35:01,382 --> 00:35:02,941
Speaker 2: I think it's one of those things where you stop

769
00:35:02,982 --> 00:35:05,261
Speaker 2: the pill and then your whole body just goes. I'm

770
00:35:05,261 --> 00:35:05,942
Speaker 2: a new person.

771
00:35:06,382 --> 00:35:08,221
Speaker 1: Have you got front me as well? Or just back

772
00:35:08,261 --> 00:35:10,781
Speaker 1: me on my chair? I used to get it on

773
00:35:10,822 --> 00:35:12,022
Speaker 1: my my nipples.

774
00:35:12,382 --> 00:35:12,702
Speaker 2: Weird.

775
00:35:12,982 --> 00:35:15,102
Speaker 4: It also is really weird when you're dating.

776
00:35:15,382 --> 00:35:17,701
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, You're like, yeah, you got to undo a

777
00:35:17,862 --> 00:35:19,021
Speaker 3: button and you're like, never mind.

778
00:35:19,062 --> 00:35:20,982
Speaker 2: And because it's like, my back knee is on my back,

779
00:35:21,181 --> 00:35:23,582
Speaker 2: so I don't really I don't really see it right

780
00:35:23,862 --> 00:35:25,861
Speaker 2: until I was wearing a backless dress one so my

781
00:35:25,942 --> 00:35:28,542
Speaker 2: dad saw my backnee and he was like, I do

782
00:35:28,582 --> 00:35:30,261
Speaker 2: think you should get that checked out? And then I

783
00:35:30,261 --> 00:35:33,341
Speaker 2: got a checked out and it was just backnee checked

784
00:35:33,382 --> 00:35:35,661
Speaker 2: Do think it.

785
00:35:35,701 --> 00:35:36,461
Speaker 1: Was that bad?

786
00:35:36,542 --> 00:35:39,542
Speaker 2: He generally got something was wrong with hey. He was

787
00:35:39,741 --> 00:35:43,142
Speaker 2: very concerned for my health and well being. So anyway,

788
00:35:43,181 --> 00:35:44,741
Speaker 2: I've been treating it, even though I can't see it

789
00:35:44,781 --> 00:35:46,102
Speaker 2: and I feel like anything on your back is none

790
00:35:46,142 --> 00:35:48,142
Speaker 2: of my business, but I've been treating it. I've been

791
00:35:48,261 --> 00:35:52,341
Speaker 2: using this little skincare toool from TBH Skincare. They're so good,

792
00:35:52,502 --> 00:35:55,301
Speaker 2: so good, so affordable. I got this from Priceline for

793
00:35:55,342 --> 00:35:58,582
Speaker 2: thirty dollars. It's the Breakout Hack Body Spirit and it's

794
00:35:58,622 --> 00:36:02,382
Speaker 2: basically just like an exfoliant spray that you can spray

795
00:36:02,542 --> 00:36:06,142
Speaker 2: on your back on. So and I actually don't need

796
00:36:06,142 --> 00:36:08,142
Speaker 2: a friend to help you if you live alone, because

797
00:36:08,181 --> 00:36:10,181
Speaker 2: like you can spray it upside down to the side.

798
00:36:10,221 --> 00:36:11,502
Speaker 2: You can get your whole back even if you have

799
00:36:11,542 --> 00:36:12,421
Speaker 2: like acne on your barm.

800
00:36:12,462 --> 00:36:13,221
Speaker 3: That's what I was going to say.

801
00:36:13,221 --> 00:36:16,542
Speaker 1: A lot of people like it's just like the thighs

802
00:36:16,582 --> 00:36:19,181
Speaker 1: aren't as difficult to get to as bad.

803
00:36:20,181 --> 00:36:22,221
Speaker 2: It's the top of yeah, And I'm like, we need

804
00:36:22,261 --> 00:36:24,822
Speaker 2: more body skin care because you get like little spots everywhere.

805
00:36:24,862 --> 00:36:27,301
Speaker 2: And already it's been like I think three weeks now,

806
00:36:27,862 --> 00:36:30,821
Speaker 2: all my little spots have like lost their redness. I

807
00:36:30,902 --> 00:36:33,861
Speaker 2: have much less. It's so so good. So if you

808
00:36:33,862 --> 00:36:36,702
Speaker 2: have a little backning problems like me, it's totally normal.

809
00:36:36,862 --> 00:36:38,382
Speaker 2: But you can fix it, can I?

810
00:36:38,462 --> 00:36:40,702
Speaker 3: Before we go, I just remembered I have a little

811
00:36:40,741 --> 00:36:43,542
Speaker 3: identical twin fun fact, would you too? Late tonight is.

812
00:36:43,542 --> 00:36:46,142
Speaker 2: A creepy one, you know I feel about creature fact

813
00:36:46,181 --> 00:36:48,301
Speaker 2: about you and it's just interesting, right, you know how

814
00:36:48,342 --> 00:36:50,862
Speaker 2: on this show six months ago, I've got a skin cancer.

815
00:36:50,582 --> 00:36:53,502
Speaker 3: Removed on my hairline, and I've had to go back

816
00:36:53,542 --> 00:36:56,301
Speaker 3: and get it checked out. The other day, Claire looks

817
00:36:56,302 --> 00:36:58,142
Speaker 3: at me and goes, look at this, and she's had

818
00:36:58,261 --> 00:37:01,341
Speaker 3: a skin camper on to the centimeter exactly the same

819
00:37:01,382 --> 00:37:03,701
Speaker 3: spot on her hairline. And what's interesting is that it's

820
00:37:03,701 --> 00:37:07,382
Speaker 3: obviously nature and nurture, like the intersection of the two things,

821
00:37:07,701 --> 00:37:11,261
Speaker 3: but it's clearly like the gene are predisposed.

822
00:37:11,302 --> 00:37:15,102
Speaker 1: That's uncanny because because you would think, I mean.

823
00:37:14,982 --> 00:37:15,701
Speaker 3: It's environmental.

824
00:37:15,701 --> 00:37:17,622
Speaker 1: If you were to get would they say that your

825
00:37:17,701 --> 00:37:20,221
Speaker 1: chance of skin cancer is very much determined by your

826
00:37:20,502 --> 00:37:24,022
Speaker 1: son exposure when you're younger, So I guess you would

827
00:37:24,022 --> 00:37:25,701
Speaker 1: have been exposed to the same things, but you don't

828
00:37:25,741 --> 00:37:28,062
Speaker 1: have the same hair. No, you don't even have the

829
00:37:28,102 --> 00:37:29,741
Speaker 1: same texture of hair exactly.

830
00:37:29,942 --> 00:37:32,221
Speaker 2: So she's got really creep.

831
00:37:32,382 --> 00:37:33,741
Speaker 1: Has she gone and got that checked out?

832
00:37:33,862 --> 00:37:35,662
Speaker 3: She's about to she's about to and it looks exactly

833
00:37:35,741 --> 00:37:37,542
Speaker 3: the same as mine did. And I was like, oh, well,

834
00:37:37,582 --> 00:37:39,982
Speaker 3: maybe because HER's an earlier stage. I'm like, maybe you

835
00:37:40,022 --> 00:37:41,462
Speaker 3: won't need to get it chopped out. You could just

836
00:37:41,502 --> 00:37:44,062
Speaker 3: do the cream or whatever. But it's weird identical.

837
00:37:44,102 --> 00:37:48,181
Speaker 1: It's so weird. I'll tell you, you'll be concerned.

838
00:37:48,661 --> 00:37:50,781
Speaker 3: That's all we have time for today. A big thank

839
00:37:50,822 --> 00:37:52,902
Speaker 3: you to all of you the out louderst for listening

840
00:37:52,902 --> 00:37:55,302
Speaker 3: to today's show. We will be back in your ears

841
00:37:55,422 --> 00:37:56,022
Speaker 3: next week.

842
00:37:56,422 --> 00:37:59,622
Speaker 2: Big thank you to our team, our group executive producer

843
00:37:59,781 --> 00:38:03,462
Speaker 2: Root Divine, our executive producer Emmeline Gazillis.

844
00:38:02,902 --> 00:38:05,941
Speaker 1: Our audio producer Leah Porges, our video producer Josh Green,

845
00:38:06,022 --> 00:38:09,781
Speaker 1: our junior content produces Coco and Tessa. Out Louders, take

846
00:38:09,781 --> 00:38:12,622
Speaker 1: care of yourself and others this weekend. Don't be a bitch,

847
00:38:13,022 --> 00:38:14,222
Speaker 1: don't convenience yourself.

848
00:38:15,582 --> 00:38:19,701
Speaker 3: Bye Aye, out Louders. If you're not ready to say goodbye,

849
00:38:19,741 --> 00:38:22,741
Speaker 3: then you can listen to yesterday's subscriber episode. It's a

850
00:38:22,822 --> 00:38:24,982
Speaker 3: chat that Amelia m and I had.

851
00:38:25,382 --> 00:38:25,582
Speaker 4: Well.

852
00:38:25,582 --> 00:38:29,181
Speaker 3: We unpacked some family drama dilemmas. We've all been there

853
00:38:29,261 --> 00:38:31,142
Speaker 3: in one way or another. Follow the link in the

854
00:38:31,181 --> 00:38:32,142
Speaker 3: show notes to listen.

855
00:38:32,781 --> 00:38:35,941
Speaker 1: Shout out to any Mum and Maya subscribers listening. If

856
00:38:35,982 --> 00:38:38,582
Speaker 1: you love the show and want to support us as well,

857
00:38:38,781 --> 00:38:41,142
Speaker 1: subscribing to Mother and Maya is the very best way

858
00:38:41,181 --> 00:38:43,261
Speaker 1: to do so. There is a link in the episode

859
00:38:43,261 --> 00:38:43,701
Speaker 1: description