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Speaker 1: You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast.

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Speaker 2: Mamma Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters

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Speaker 2: that this podcast is recorded on. If I say no

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Speaker 2: to that thing or I don't do that thing they want,

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Speaker 2: then those people are going to be upset with me.

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Speaker 2: And her point is let them be upset with you.

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Speaker 2: It will be all right. Hello, and welcome to Mama

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Speaker 2: Mia out Loud. In a moment you are going to

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Speaker 2: hear what all that was about. But first, welcome to

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Speaker 2: our Friday show. You know out Loud is that on

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Speaker 2: Friday we don't talk about the news cycle. We just exhale,

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Speaker 2: hold hands, gossip.

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Speaker 1: That's pretty much talk you. I also like that we've

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Speaker 1: only done two shows in Marina.

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Speaker 3: We need a break from the news cycle. It's Trevor Welming.

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Speaker 2: Well the world. The world today is Friday, the seventeenth

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Speaker 2: of January, and I am a Hollywaynwright.

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Speaker 1: I'm me of Friedman, and I'm Jesse Stevens.

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Speaker 2: And on today's show, if you haven't already, you are

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Speaker 2: going to hear these two words everywhere in your work world,

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Speaker 2: and they are apparently the key to peace and to

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Speaker 2: dealing with difficult people. Yes, we're talking about let them theory,

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Speaker 2: also a different way to shop, a very twisty TV show,

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Speaker 2: and two new books that Mia couldn't put down. That's

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Speaker 2: our recommendations and our best and worst summer holidays, which

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Speaker 2: include My Murderous Domestic Goddess meltdown being a little too

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Speaker 2: close to tragedy and Mia not working. But first, Jesse Stevens.

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Speaker 3: In case you missed it, you should never ever wear

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Speaker 3: a butt plug to an MRI skin no A pending right, Yeah, yeah, okay.

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Speaker 3: We are nothing if not helpful, And today I thought

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Speaker 3: i'd give you both some advice because I know that

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Speaker 3: some of us aren't good with instructions. Maya, you don't

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Speaker 3: often read the instructions and so you need them laid

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Speaker 3: out too, very clearly, and I want to avoid potential disaster.

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Speaker 1: But plug out before scan, Yeah.

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Speaker 3: In before fine, just before you scan. Take it out,

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Speaker 3: pop it back in.

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Speaker 1: After pop it in the waiting room, yeah, pop it out.

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Speaker 3: This story is actually a bit of rif I haven't

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Speaker 3: been able to stop thinking about it.

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Speaker 1: Actually, maybe not in the waiting room. Should I clarify?

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Speaker 1: You probably want to go to the bathroom.

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Speaker 2: Bathroom?

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Speaker 1: Fun?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, fine, a twenty two year old woman in the

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Speaker 3: US underwent an MRI scan and she did not disclose

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Speaker 3: that she was wearing a butt plug. I actually have

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Speaker 3: a lot of empathy for this woman because she purchased

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Speaker 3: the butt plug on the basis that it was made

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Speaker 3: of one hundred percent silicon. It said it with silicon,

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Speaker 3: so she didn't think it was relevant that she had

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Speaker 3: a butt plug in. However, she read the instruction she did.

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Speaker 3: The butt plug had a metal core, and what happens

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Speaker 3: is this causes a hazardous reaction between the powerful magnets

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Speaker 3: in the machine and the metal parts of the toy.

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Speaker 1: And it's also like, don't put your butt in the

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Speaker 1: microwave if you've got a butt plug in really yeah,

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Speaker 1: because metal. You also don't put metal in the mid

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Speaker 1: any metal in them. No metal in an MRI, No

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Speaker 1: middle in a microwave, no butt.

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Speaker 3: This is I'm learning a lot my bus about it.

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Speaker 3: A scan of the image was then circulated on social

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Speaker 3: media and you can see that what happened was that

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Speaker 3: it was dragged through her body. It caused damage to

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Speaker 3: organs and tissues along the way. Oh that's actually bad,

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Speaker 3: that's horrible. Reports are that she felt nauseous faint and

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Speaker 3: she was screaming in pain. She was rushed to hospital.

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Speaker 3: We know that she survived the injuries. We don't know

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Speaker 3: much more.

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Speaker 1: But I thought you're going to say, we don't know

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Speaker 1: how the butt plug actually is, whether the butt plugs. No.

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Speaker 1: But the reason that would have happened in that you

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Speaker 1: can't have any jewelries because MirOS are all about magnets.

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Speaker 1: It would have magnetized the butt plug.

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Speaker 2: Oh.

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Speaker 1: So I then started like someone trying to pull a

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Speaker 1: tampon out through your throat.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, so I started reading about this. In the US,

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Speaker 3: A few things have happened where someone's gone in with

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Speaker 3: a firearm in their pocket and the firearm has discharged. Well,

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Speaker 3: that's stupid, that is stupid. But I have empathy for

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Speaker 3: this person because it said one hundred percent silicon.

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Speaker 1: Call me naive, but I don't understand what a butt

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Speaker 1: plug does.

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Speaker 3: It stimulates the Do women have a prostate? They don't

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Speaker 3: do they? I think they have a part in their button.

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Speaker 2: That's look at loe of those vanilla idiots in the world.

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Speaker 2: All I really know is that when I was young

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Speaker 2: and I first went into a sex shop, remember sex

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Speaker 2: shops before you bought all those something that there was

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Speaker 2: this big colorful plastic box that a bit like what

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Speaker 2: you get kids toys in what I just said, my

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Speaker 2: first butt plug, I thought, that's the startup butt plug.

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Speaker 2: That's cute. Out ladders.

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Speaker 1: We have questions. If there's anyone among you who.

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Speaker 3: I'm sure they.

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Speaker 1: Send us a voice note, tell us how bout plugs work,

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Speaker 1: what they're good for.

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Speaker 3: I thought it was more you'd use a butt plug

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Speaker 3: during sex, whatever that sex looks.

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Speaker 2: Can we just wind up the but to wear it?

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Speaker 3: You know, as you go about your date. Your doctor's

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Speaker 3: appointment is surprising. I'm not judgmental, as just I didn't

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Speaker 3: know that. And we learn new things.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes you have to do chores, you have to go

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Speaker 1: and get scans, and you need a little treat.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Like Megan says, we're finding joy in every moment.

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Speaker 4: You need to get outside your comfort zone. It's not

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Speaker 4: about taking risks. It's about getting outside your comfort zone.

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Speaker 4: Those first three seconds when you push herself out of bed,

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Speaker 4: they blow, but once you're up, it's great.

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Speaker 2: Apparently we all needed permission to just back the fuck off.

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Speaker 2: American change and motivation expert Meil Robins is selling books

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Speaker 2: by the bucket loads and going viral all over the

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Speaker 2: Internet with a theory that can be defined in two

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Speaker 2: little words, let them let me explain a little bit.

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Speaker 2: Fifteen years ago, Meil Robins says she was paralyzed by anxiety,

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Speaker 2: but now she tells many other people how to do

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Speaker 2: what they've always wanted to do by not procrastinating or

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Speaker 2: implementing a five second rule to always jump to action

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Speaker 2: when you want you've got something on to do list.

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Speaker 2: She's like a big Internet guru, think a slightly less

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Speaker 2: academic and less Texan Rene Brown.

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Speaker 3: She's got one of the most viral ted talks of

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Speaker 3: all time.

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Speaker 2: She does, and she has sold more than a million books,

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Speaker 2: she has had more than a billion video views. And

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Speaker 2: Oprah Winfrey says that this new book that Let Them

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Speaker 2: Theory is the best self help book she has ever read,

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Speaker 2: which I imagine that Oprah has read a few, she's

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Speaker 2: read them.

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Speaker 1: On what's interesting. I've been following Meil Robins for quite

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Speaker 1: a few years and she's always been on that level

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Speaker 1: below the Glennons, the Brenees, certainly you know, the Oprah's,

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Speaker 1: and she's been doing some really good work. But with

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Speaker 1: this book.

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Speaker 2: She's broken.

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Speaker 1: She's absolutely broken through.

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Speaker 2: And the thing that's interesting about that is it is

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Speaker 2: the most simple idea you can imagine. She says that

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Speaker 2: the killer cure for anxiety is simple. Stop trying to

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Speaker 2: control people around you. Let them do what they want.

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Speaker 2: It's not your business. Focus on your business, let them

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Speaker 2: get on with theirs, and breathe easy. Here's a little

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Speaker 2: grab of her explaining a few examples of times when

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Speaker 2: you should just let them.

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Speaker 4: I've been in a situation where maybe your buddies organize

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Speaker 4: a golf trip and they don't include you, or the

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Speaker 4: women in your life go away for a weekend and

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Speaker 4: you're not invited, or a friend that you adore is

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Speaker 4: dating a real asshole, somebody who's horrible for them.

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Speaker 1: Let them.

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Speaker 4: I mean, how much does you worrying about it? How

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Speaker 4: is that going to change anything?

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Speaker 1: It's not.

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Speaker 4: How does spending two hundred hours talking to your friend

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Speaker 4: about this horrible person over and over and over. How

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Speaker 4: does that? How it doesn't let them. If somebody's firing you,

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Speaker 4: let them. If your company's going through layoffs, let them.

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Speaker 4: It is so liberating when you drop the sword, when

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Speaker 4: you just let go.

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Speaker 2: It is liberating to drop the sword Maya.

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Speaker 1: Everyone's talking about this over summer. You know, she's been

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Speaker 1: doing the rounds of podcasts and interviews and there's been

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Speaker 1: ne York Time stories and everybody's talking about it. In

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Speaker 1: the book This saved my Bacon. On the weekend when

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Speaker 1: I was about to do I was feeling so furious

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Speaker 1: about a particular situation and something that someone that I

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Speaker 1: know had done. I was going to really cause some damage.

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Speaker 1: It's a good thing to some situations that I was in.

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Speaker 1: This wasn't a work thing. And I thought about this

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Speaker 1: and I just thought, let them. And one of the

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Speaker 1: biggest things I struggle with is control. And therapists have

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Speaker 1: said to me, you know, control through overconcerned, because sometimes

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Speaker 1: we think that we're worrying about people and that we're

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Speaker 1: being kind and that we're being I say, it's.

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Speaker 2: A form of anxiety rights.

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Speaker 1: It's also just a form of control. It's also a

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Speaker 1: form of you know, I don't like what you're doing.

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Speaker 1: I think you could do it better this way. I

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Speaker 1: think it would be better if you did it this way.

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Speaker 1: And I also know what it's like to expend a

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Speaker 1: huge amount of energy feeling enraged or upset about things

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Speaker 1: I can't control and that have nothing to do with me.

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Speaker 1: In many cases, Donald Trump's being a really good example.

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Speaker 1: And this, to me has actually summarized my approach to

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Speaker 1: this new Trump regime, like the second time around. Maybe

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Speaker 1: that's why it struck such a cause I've literally gone

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Speaker 1: let it go. You know, this is the kind of

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Speaker 1: the frozen let it go go, But this is let them,

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Speaker 1: just like what can I do. I can't change Donald Trump,

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Speaker 1: I can't change what ALON must doing. Let them.

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Speaker 3: It's powerful, Like you know, I've even found it with

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Speaker 3: negative commentary, and I find that quite liberating to just

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Speaker 3: go let people think what they're going to think. You

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Speaker 3: have no control over that. And I guess one of

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Speaker 3: the criticisms of this has been that it's not particularly new,

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Speaker 3: but she acknowledges that herself, that this is stoicism, it's Buddhism.

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Speaker 3: I've sort of done research into Buddhism over the years,

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Speaker 3: and I really like the idea that there's no point

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Speaker 3: in resisting the moment. Like the analogy that I always

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Speaker 3: think of is you're sitting in traffic and there's a

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Speaker 3: traffic jam, and every part of your body is going

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Speaker 3: I don't want to be in this moment. I don't

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Speaker 3: want to, but it's like, let it happen. No amount

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Speaker 3: of resisting is going to change the fact that you're

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Speaker 3: in the traffic jam. Like you've just got to take

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Speaker 3: a deep breath and move on. And it also reminds

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Speaker 3: me of in my nana's She lived with us growing up,

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Speaker 3: and she had a thing up on her wall, and

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Speaker 3: it was the Serenity prayer, and the serenity prayer says, God,

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Speaker 3: grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

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Speaker 3: the courage to change the things I can, and the

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Speaker 3: wisdom to know the difference. And she would always always

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Speaker 3: say that. So it's fundamental to so many religions.

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Speaker 1: That's recovery program.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I think it's great because the thing is

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Speaker 2: is it's true for those big things like you say

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Speaker 2: me are about trumpel though you don't want it to

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Speaker 2: tip into and placency and apathy and never wanted to

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Speaker 2: change anything, but it is particularly useful and I think

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Speaker 2: particularly for women in day to day life.

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Speaker 1: But just to pin you down on that for a second,

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Speaker 1: I literally can't.

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Speaker 2: Show you can't. But if the whole world just went

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Speaker 2: let's just let them all have their way and doesn't

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Speaker 2: matter who you vote for.

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Speaker 1: It let them is about person.

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Speaker 2: And so she has a few caveats in this, because

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Speaker 2: I can hear if that louds are thinking about this,

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Speaker 2: they'll be like, but what if the person is bla?

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Speaker 2: And what if the person is bla? So in the

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Speaker 2: podcast I listened to about it, she had some caveats,

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Speaker 2: she said, because one of the ways she talked about

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Speaker 2: this a lot was in parenting. She said, you know,

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Speaker 2: you've got teenagers and maybe they want to quit a

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Speaker 2: sport that you've invested loads of time in, and they've

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Speaker 2: invested loads of time and you think it's a mistake

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Speaker 2: for them, and blah blah blah and those kind of things.

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Speaker 2: So she talked a lot in it about parenting about

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Speaker 2: like let them, let them fail, let them fall, let

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Speaker 2: them make the mistakes. But she had a few caveats.

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Speaker 2: So number one was if it's risky, so you know,

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Speaker 2: it's not let them like hoon down the road on

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Speaker 2: an ebike at a thousand miles an hour with no helmet,

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Speaker 2: like that's not it. If it's discriminatory, so it's not

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Speaker 2: just let them be racist. And awful to you or

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Speaker 2: a coworker or whatever. That's not it. She said, you

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Speaker 2: have to speak up in that situation. She said, if

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Speaker 2: you're negotiating your salary, she was very specific about that.

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Speaker 2: She said, women in particular, always always negotiate your salary.

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Speaker 2: And if someone else's behavior is directly crossing your boundaries,

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Speaker 2: which is obviously very male Robin's talk. But also it's

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Speaker 2: like if someone else's behavior is actively affecting you.

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Speaker 1: If they're abusing you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly. So it's not like just let everyone do anything,

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Speaker 2: but it is very freeing. And I don't struggle too

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Speaker 2: much with this because I'm not a particularly controlling person,

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Speaker 2: although Brent may beg to differ on that point. But

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Speaker 2: I was thinking about this that when I get really

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Speaker 2: upset about something, so in my personal life. Last year,

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Speaker 2: I was really mad with Brent because he chose to

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Speaker 2: go away on this weekend. He won't mind me talking

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Speaker 2: about this, it's fine. Chose to go away on this

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Speaker 2: weekend with his friends. That for various reasons, I thought

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Speaker 2: he wasn't going to go it was inconvenient for us,

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Speaker 2: one of his friends had dropped out, blah blah blah,

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Speaker 2: and I was so mad with him. I was so

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Speaker 2: mad with him, and he just went. And she talks

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Speaker 2: about this about how it works with partners when you've

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Speaker 2: been with someone a long time and you kind of

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Speaker 2: think that you're almost one person now and you make

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Speaker 2: the decisions, and she's you have to let people be

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Speaker 2: who they are. I was spent first twenty four hours

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Speaker 2: of him being away just simmering, furious, can't fucking believe it,

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Speaker 2: Like this has made my life hard? What a selfish choice?

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Speaker 2: And then I got to a let them position, which

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Speaker 2: was very much like God, let Brent be Brent, right,

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Speaker 2: Like he's a grown up man. He's allowed to do

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Speaker 2: things that he wants to do. Every decision he makes

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Speaker 2: isn't about me, Like do I really want a partnership

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Speaker 2: with somebody who doesn't get to be himself and do

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Speaker 2: the things he wants to do, even if I think

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Speaker 2: they're stupid.

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Speaker 1: It's not hard about them that.

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Speaker 3: And I've read parts of the book, but I haven't

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Speaker 3: read the whole book.

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Speaker 2: I don't think it needs a whole book.

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Speaker 3: If my mom has read and said it was.

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Speaker 2: Great, I'm sure it is, and she's great. But even

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Speaker 2: on her podcast, she explains it in the intro and

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Speaker 2: then she goes, you're smart people, you get it. But

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Speaker 2: I'm going to talk for another twenty minutes anyway.

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Speaker 3: But like, for example, all right, you get home and

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Speaker 3: someone's left the milk out on the bench, right, so

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Speaker 3: let them. But then there's no milk for you because

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Speaker 3: it was left out, and now it's all bad.

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Speaker 1: But no, no, it's different. The other part of it

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Speaker 1: is also then let me, So it's what can I change.

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Speaker 1: Let them is also about it's not just about control,

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Speaker 1: it's also about I was listening to her interviewed on

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Speaker 1: Glennon's podcast We Can Do Hard Things and Mel Robins

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Speaker 1: her parents live far away and she needs two flights

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Speaker 1: to go and see them, and for the holidays this

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Speaker 1: year she didn't go and fly to see them, wanted

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Speaker 1: to stay home to be closer to her children.

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Speaker 2: Whatever.

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Speaker 1: She said, I feel terrible that I live so far

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Speaker 1: away from my parents. I knew they'd be disappointed. I

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Speaker 1: wasn't going to visit them for the holidays. But she said,

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Speaker 1: let them will.

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Speaker 2: And then be disappointed.

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Speaker 1: Let them be disappointed. And she said, it doesn't mean

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Speaker 1: be an asshole to everybody and be selfish but she said,

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Speaker 1: if I want to go and visit them, let that

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Speaker 1: be because I want to be a good daughter, not

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Speaker 1: because they don't think I'm a good daughter. I remember

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Speaker 1: that I'm disappointing them.

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Speaker 2: She's very clear about that. You have to let other

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Speaker 2: people have feelings about you that you're uncomfortable with. So

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Speaker 2: it's that idea of like, if I say no to

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Speaker 2: that thing, or I don't do that thing they want,

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Speaker 2: then those people are going to be upset with me.

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Speaker 2: And her point is let them be upset with you.

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Speaker 2: It will be all right.

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Speaker 3: And it's often the kind of thing right. I remember

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Speaker 3: years ago I made a decision that I knew was

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Speaker 3: going to really upset someone. It wasn't that it was

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Speaker 3: a mean decision. It was just a decision that would

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Speaker 3: impact them and it would disappoint them. And I was

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Speaker 3: speaking to a friend and they just went, we have

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Speaker 3: no control over their feelings. Trying to manage their feelings

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Speaker 3: is kind of manipulative. In fact, you've got to talk

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Speaker 3: to them. Maybe they'll hate you for three days. It

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Speaker 3: probably will hate you for three days. That's their job

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Speaker 3: to go and work through it. It's not yours. But

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Speaker 3: two instances where I find this really hard. The first

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Speaker 3: is parenting and the second is marriage with parenting. As

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Speaker 3: you say, there's.

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Speaker 2: Those two really simple little things.

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Speaker 3: Yes, exactly. So I've been watching and I'm sure we'll

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Speaker 3: talk about this later, but the Jerry Springer documentary that's

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Speaker 3: on Netflix, and there's a story of a guy who

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Speaker 3: was maybe twenty twenty one, and he started working for

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Speaker 3: the Jerry Springer Show and his father was in the

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Speaker 3: entertainment industry, and his father was saying to him, what

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Speaker 3: you are doing is not good for the world, like

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Speaker 3: this show is bad. Right according to the let them theory,

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Speaker 3: are you meant to guide your children in that way

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Speaker 3: and let them know that a decision.

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Speaker 2: The twenty one let them?

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Speaker 1: Really no.

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Speaker 3: But there's what happens when you see people making such

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Speaker 3: bad difference.

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Speaker 1: Because of themselves. I imagine is let me, so let

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Speaker 1: me tell him what I think. But her point is

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Speaker 1: that in parenting or with any of our personal relationships,

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Speaker 1: when we try to manage other people's experiences or other

360
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Speaker 1: people's lives, that's a message to them that we don't

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Speaker 1: think they can do it themselves. So it's very disempowering.

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Speaker 1: She was giving an example of she thinks that she

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Speaker 1: prolonged her daughter's anxiety for years because her daughter had

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Speaker 1: anxiety and she'd get up in the middle of the

365
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Speaker 1: night and she'd come and she'd try to get into

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Speaker 1: bed with Mel and her husband, and Mel would just

367
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Speaker 1: like open the blankets and let her get in. She said,

368
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Speaker 1: I did that for years, And what I told her

369
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Speaker 1: was that, yes, you are correct to be so scared,

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Speaker 1: and this isn't a tiny child, this is an older

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Speaker 1: child that you can't sleep through the night. Instead of

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Speaker 1: helping her face down the fact, I trust that you're

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Speaker 1: going to be able to overcome this. And that's the thing. Also,

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00:17:03,822 --> 00:17:07,502
Speaker 1: back to helicopter parenting. We got this memo that any

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Speaker 1: negative feeling that our children had a failure on our

376
00:17:10,581 --> 00:17:13,502
Speaker 1: part and that could lead to terrible But it's the

377
00:17:13,502 --> 00:17:14,422
Speaker 1: opposite of let them.

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Speaker 2: But back to that example, your adult child is making

379
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Speaker 2: a choice, a career choice or something that you don't

380
00:17:19,942 --> 00:17:23,461
Speaker 2: approve of. You express your feelings about it, but then

381
00:17:23,502 --> 00:17:25,662
Speaker 2: you have to let them. What's the option. That's what

382
00:17:25,661 --> 00:17:27,661
Speaker 2: what I find very freeing, and I think I've actually

383
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Speaker 2: learned this lesson quite early. You can't stop them, so

384
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Speaker 2: why are you wasting all your energy and destroying your

385
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Speaker 2: personal peace. When she talks about this, she has this

386
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Speaker 2: sort of expression of the thoughts in your head where

387
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Speaker 2: you're going, like, for god sake, what does he think

388
00:17:41,542 --> 00:17:43,181
Speaker 2: he's doing it? Don't and why doesn't she know this?

389
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Speaker 2: Why doesn't she know that? Don't they know if they

390
00:17:44,821 --> 00:17:46,901
Speaker 2: make that blah blah la, It's like that is just

391
00:17:47,022 --> 00:17:50,981
Speaker 2: you and your energy, churning, churning, churning. It's not going

392
00:17:51,061 --> 00:17:53,221
Speaker 2: to change the outcome. The kid who wants to go

393
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Speaker 2: and work at Jerry Springer like obviously not necessarily ideal,

394
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Speaker 2: but I worked in tabloid magazines for years. I'm sure

395
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Speaker 2: my parents were not that proud of me in those moments.

396
00:18:01,861 --> 00:18:03,581
Speaker 2: The thing is is you have to let people be

397
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Speaker 2: who they are, and you're allowed to have your feelings

398
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Speaker 2: about it, but you can't try and control them because

399
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Speaker 2: you can't control them, you know what I mean.

400
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Speaker 3: So it's a useless and suse what I think about

401
00:18:13,942 --> 00:18:16,581
Speaker 3: in marriage, And I struggle with this when you say

402
00:18:16,621 --> 00:18:19,382
Speaker 3: something and when you don't, when something irritates you, when

403
00:18:19,381 --> 00:18:22,461
Speaker 3: you're interrogating whether that's just you, how much it's impacting you.

404
00:18:23,141 --> 00:18:27,101
Speaker 3: Basic example, let's say you are married and your partner

405
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Speaker 3: goes and plays golf for six hours on a Saturday,

406
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:31,421
Speaker 3: six hours on a Sunday and leaves you with the

407
00:18:31,502 --> 00:18:34,341
Speaker 3: kids let them go and play golf.

408
00:18:34,661 --> 00:18:38,302
Speaker 2: Well, by question, I think that's a negotiation, right, because

409
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Speaker 2: that is crossing a boundary. I reckon in the mel

410
00:18:40,422 --> 00:18:42,982
Speaker 2: Robins framework, that is crossing a boundary. Your boundary might

411
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Speaker 2: be like I am not the default parent all weekend.

412
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Speaker 2: I am not. That is my boundary, So that's different.

413
00:18:49,341 --> 00:18:52,821
Speaker 2: A marriage is a partnership, but that's an important thing, right,

414
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Speaker 2: So you might come to a compromise. You're allowed to

415
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Speaker 2: play god not allowed, but go play golf twice a

416
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Speaker 2: month or whatever, or I'll trade off for this, and

417
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Speaker 2: parents do that naturally all the time. But trying to

418
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Speaker 2: make somebody not like golf anymore and not ever want

419
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Speaker 2: to do it and always, you know what I mean,

420
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Speaker 2: that's the opposite.

421
00:19:08,742 --> 00:19:11,861
Speaker 3: Of life's really hard. I think listening to this and

422
00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:14,582
Speaker 3: reading these I really like this theory and I think

423
00:19:14,621 --> 00:19:17,502
Speaker 3: it really helps, but I think it probably does have limitations.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and it doesn't apply to every single situation.

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Speaker 3: And one that I kind of kept thinking about was

426
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Speaker 3: when you live with people who are struggling with mental

427
00:19:26,462 --> 00:19:29,942
Speaker 3: illness and who are not making decisions in their best interest.

428
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Speaker 2: It's really hard.

429
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Speaker 3: Maybe it is the right thing to do.

430
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Speaker 1: I heard her talks hard with Glennon. So she said,

431
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Speaker 1: if you have a friend or a child, or a

432
00:19:38,502 --> 00:19:41,861
Speaker 1: partner or someone in your life, say with depression, she said,

433
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Speaker 1: let me. Part of it is you can create an

434
00:19:45,222 --> 00:19:49,782
Speaker 1: environment in which they can get better, like you can.

435
00:19:50,341 --> 00:19:52,262
Speaker 1: You know, have an agreement that you'll go in every

436
00:19:52,262 --> 00:19:53,741
Speaker 1: morning and you'll lo ope and the curtains so that

437
00:19:53,782 --> 00:19:57,262
Speaker 1: they'll be sunlight in the room. You can play music

438
00:19:57,302 --> 00:19:59,821
Speaker 1: in the house so to lift their spirits. You can

439
00:19:59,982 --> 00:20:02,422
Speaker 1: pick up your friend to take her to the yoga

440
00:20:02,462 --> 00:20:04,581
Speaker 1: class instead of meeting her at the yoga class, so

441
00:20:04,621 --> 00:20:07,061
Speaker 1: that you can be sure that she gets there rather

442
00:20:07,141 --> 00:20:09,781
Speaker 1: than you know. And I've noticed this in friendship too.

443
00:20:09,861 --> 00:20:11,742
Speaker 1: As soon as you give someone advice, whether it's a

444
00:20:11,821 --> 00:20:15,422
Speaker 1: child a friend, they get their back up because you've

445
00:20:15,422 --> 00:20:17,302
Speaker 1: given them a job to do, and you're trying to

446
00:20:17,341 --> 00:20:19,262
Speaker 1: get them to do something that they don't want to do.

447
00:20:19,341 --> 00:20:22,661
Speaker 1: And we are programmed to move towards what's easy and

448
00:20:22,742 --> 00:20:25,542
Speaker 1: away from what's hard. And if you're telling someone to

449
00:20:25,621 --> 00:20:27,181
Speaker 1: do all the time to do what they don't want

450
00:20:27,222 --> 00:20:30,141
Speaker 1: to do. They're going to move away from you, So

451
00:20:30,182 --> 00:20:31,942
Speaker 1: you're going to lose that connection.

452
00:20:31,782 --> 00:20:33,661
Speaker 2: Right, you know what I mean, Like we're not always

453
00:20:33,742 --> 00:20:36,341
Speaker 2: right in our thing of like we know what you

454
00:20:36,381 --> 00:20:38,581
Speaker 2: should be doing, We're not always right, you know, So

455
00:20:38,621 --> 00:20:40,262
Speaker 2: I think you also have to let that in. But

456
00:20:40,341 --> 00:20:42,542
Speaker 2: I heard her talking on the podcast about this in

457
00:20:42,621 --> 00:20:44,542
Speaker 2: terms of friends or family with addiction, and she was

458
00:20:44,621 --> 00:20:47,302
Speaker 2: quite let them about it. She was like, an addict

459
00:20:47,542 --> 00:20:51,302
Speaker 2: has never got sober without wanting to do it themselves.

460
00:20:51,821 --> 00:20:54,621
Speaker 2: So it doesn't mean just let them. Sure have some money,

461
00:20:54,702 --> 00:20:56,821
Speaker 2: spend it on drugs. I don't care. Like obviously, it

462
00:20:56,861 --> 00:20:59,462
Speaker 2: comes back to boundaries, like you have your own boundaries

463
00:20:59,462 --> 00:21:01,382
Speaker 2: about it. You offer them as much support and encouragement

464
00:21:01,422 --> 00:21:05,061
Speaker 2: as possible, but you can't fix that for them, and

465
00:21:05,101 --> 00:21:06,901
Speaker 2: so you have to let them and you have to

466
00:21:07,022 --> 00:21:10,022
Speaker 2: let them get towards their answers. And I think that

467
00:21:10,022 --> 00:21:13,462
Speaker 2: that's really interesting to think about. I think the little

468
00:21:13,462 --> 00:21:15,101
Speaker 2: ways and the big ways. But I think one of

469
00:21:15,141 --> 00:21:18,421
Speaker 2: her main things is it's supposed to bring you more peace,

470
00:21:19,222 --> 00:21:22,422
Speaker 2: So you have more peace and are not constantly stressing

471
00:21:22,462 --> 00:21:24,821
Speaker 2: about everybody because you're like you know what I can't

472
00:21:24,861 --> 00:21:25,302
Speaker 2: fix that?

473
00:21:25,462 --> 00:21:27,982
Speaker 1: Let them out loud as in a moment. We have

474
00:21:28,061 --> 00:21:31,381
Speaker 1: things for you to read, watch and buy. It's the

475
00:21:31,422 --> 00:21:33,502
Speaker 1: records from our summer break, because we did all of

476
00:21:33,542 --> 00:21:39,701
Speaker 1: those things and we are desperate to tell you about them.

477
00:21:39,782 --> 00:21:43,702
Speaker 2: Vibes, ideas, atmosphere, something casual, something fun.

478
00:21:44,222 --> 00:21:45,742
Speaker 1: This is my best recommendation.

479
00:21:47,141 --> 00:21:50,061
Speaker 3: It's Friday, so we want to help set you up

480
00:21:50,101 --> 00:21:53,061
Speaker 3: for your weekend with our very best recommendations. We are

481
00:21:53,222 --> 00:21:57,021
Speaker 3: bursting with them, but we're gonna try and pace ourselves. Holly,

482
00:21:57,581 --> 00:21:59,061
Speaker 3: what's your recommendation for this week?

483
00:21:59,381 --> 00:22:01,381
Speaker 2: My recommendation is a show on Netflix that I know

484
00:22:01,462 --> 00:22:04,061
Speaker 2: lots about louders are watching. It's called Missing You.

485
00:22:05,661 --> 00:22:08,462
Speaker 1: I haven't heard from Josh in eleven years. Maybe it's

486
00:22:08,502 --> 00:22:10,101
Speaker 1: time tried something.

487
00:22:10,901 --> 00:22:11,782
Speaker 2: What about that up?

488
00:22:11,821 --> 00:22:12,302
Speaker 3: I signed you?

489
00:22:12,381 --> 00:22:19,942
Speaker 1: Up? With you and Detective Inspects Kat Donovan. Today we're

490
00:22:19,982 --> 00:22:24,462
Speaker 1: appealing for information regarding the disappearance of Rishie mcgari a.

491
00:22:24,581 --> 00:22:33,061
Speaker 2: Steprel's missing. You're the only one, the conflctor.

492
00:22:33,702 --> 00:22:35,061
Speaker 1: That's number one on Netflix.

493
00:22:35,101 --> 00:22:38,062
Speaker 2: It is number one on Netflix. It is a British

494
00:22:38,542 --> 00:22:42,462
Speaker 2: crime drama. It is written by Harlan Corbyn, who does

495
00:22:42,502 --> 00:22:45,182
Speaker 2: all of those big, twisty British things. He did fool

496
00:22:45,262 --> 00:22:46,662
Speaker 2: me once, which was massive, Right.

497
00:22:46,742 --> 00:22:49,061
Speaker 3: I feel like I watched one years ago and I

498
00:22:49,061 --> 00:22:51,862
Speaker 3: didn't love it, Like maybe it felt a bit cheesy.

499
00:22:52,022 --> 00:22:54,021
Speaker 2: I don't know that everybody's gonna love it, but in

500
00:22:54,101 --> 00:22:57,101
Speaker 2: terms of a show that's really binge able and like

501
00:22:57,262 --> 00:22:59,381
Speaker 2: you kind of like need to know, the setup is

502
00:22:59,422 --> 00:23:02,022
Speaker 2: great in my opinion, which is that so anyone who

503
00:23:02,061 --> 00:23:05,782
Speaker 2: watches Slow Horses also will immediately recognize the lead. She's

504
00:23:05,782 --> 00:23:09,302
Speaker 2: called Rosalind a Laser and she is a British actresses

505
00:23:09,302 --> 00:23:10,861
Speaker 2: and made and she's in Slow Horses and she's one

506
00:23:10,861 --> 00:23:13,902
Speaker 2: of the best things in Slow Horses and she has

507
00:23:13,942 --> 00:23:15,542
Speaker 2: the lead in this and she's a cop. And what

508
00:23:15,581 --> 00:23:19,141
Speaker 2: you find out quite early on is that a her father,

509
00:23:19,182 --> 00:23:23,262
Speaker 2: who was a cop, was murdered, but b eleven years ago,

510
00:23:23,381 --> 00:23:25,862
Speaker 2: the love of her life, the guy who proposed to her,

511
00:23:25,901 --> 00:23:27,581
Speaker 2: who she was building a life with, who she was

512
00:23:27,621 --> 00:23:32,422
Speaker 2: obsessed with, just absolutely disappeared, like just ghosted, entirely disappeared

513
00:23:32,422 --> 00:23:34,261
Speaker 2: from her life, not in a missing person way like

514
00:23:34,302 --> 00:23:37,021
Speaker 2: he cleared out his clothes from the cupboard, he just

515
00:23:37,302 --> 00:23:40,141
Speaker 2: ghosted her. That's a great point, right, Okay, and then

516
00:23:40,982 --> 00:23:43,661
Speaker 2: years later, all these years later, she's matched with him

517
00:23:43,661 --> 00:23:48,782
Speaker 2: on a dating app. Oh wow, And that's where it starts,

518
00:23:49,101 --> 00:23:51,462
Speaker 2: right And then it's like all these things. There are

519
00:23:51,502 --> 00:23:53,861
Speaker 2: like three different storylines going on, because there's also this

520
00:23:53,982 --> 00:23:57,221
Speaker 2: very grim missing person's case that she's working on. And

521
00:23:57,262 --> 00:23:59,462
Speaker 2: as with all cop shows ever, it's like, you're getting

522
00:23:59,462 --> 00:24:01,302
Speaker 2: too close to this case, I'm taking you off it.

523
00:24:01,381 --> 00:24:03,622
Speaker 2: I'm going to keep working on it anyway. Like it's

524
00:24:03,621 --> 00:24:06,061
Speaker 2: got all those tropes that we are very familiar with,

525
00:24:06,702 --> 00:24:09,741
Speaker 2: but it's also twisty and surprising, and it's got some

526
00:24:09,782 --> 00:24:12,621
Speaker 2: really interesting characters in it. And I just once she

527
00:24:12,661 --> 00:24:15,461
Speaker 2: gets matched with this guy, she can't let it go,

528
00:24:15,581 --> 00:24:17,462
Speaker 2: as you wouldn't be able to, and all her friends

529
00:24:17,502 --> 00:24:18,781
Speaker 2: are like, let it go, let it go, And then

530
00:24:18,821 --> 00:24:21,701
Speaker 2: where it leads her. It's really good. It's called Missing You.

531
00:24:21,982 --> 00:24:25,221
Speaker 2: It is not like an artistic masterpiece, but it is

532
00:24:25,341 --> 00:24:28,101
Speaker 2: just something that will give you lots of viewing pleasure

533
00:24:28,182 --> 00:24:29,702
Speaker 2: over a few good hours.

534
00:24:29,982 --> 00:24:30,821
Speaker 3: Maya, how about you.

535
00:24:31,061 --> 00:24:33,581
Speaker 1: I read quite a few books, and two of the

536
00:24:33,621 --> 00:24:36,661
Speaker 1: best that I read over the holidays will buy the

537
00:24:36,702 --> 00:24:38,582
Speaker 1: same author that I've been hearing about for a while.

538
00:24:38,621 --> 00:24:42,782
Speaker 1: Her name's Claire Lombardo. I think they're Reese book club picks.

539
00:24:43,581 --> 00:24:46,302
Speaker 1: I started with her most recent book called Same As

540
00:24:46,302 --> 00:24:49,942
Speaker 1: It Ever Was, that was released last year. All her books,

541
00:24:50,061 --> 00:24:52,982
Speaker 1: or the two books that I read, through the perspective

542
00:24:53,182 --> 00:24:57,421
Speaker 1: of women, often women who were in their forties and fifties,

543
00:24:57,982 --> 00:25:02,061
Speaker 1: and they look at families and family lives and family relationships.

544
00:25:02,101 --> 00:25:06,102
Speaker 1: So it's not about murders or mysteries. It's not like that.

545
00:25:06,341 --> 00:25:09,861
Speaker 1: It's really about interpersonal relationships. So Julia is this only

546
00:25:09,901 --> 00:25:12,821
Speaker 1: stay at home mum who befriends this older woman called Helen.

547
00:25:13,422 --> 00:25:16,501
Speaker 1: And not a huge amount happens, actually, but the characters

548
00:25:16,542 --> 00:25:19,942
Speaker 1: are just really really interesting. It's about career and marriage

549
00:25:19,982 --> 00:25:22,821
Speaker 1: and parenting. It's just really funny. The characters are very

550
00:25:22,821 --> 00:25:26,662
Speaker 1: interestingly drawn, and you just shit a merri pages. Yeah. Yeah,

551
00:25:26,661 --> 00:25:29,222
Speaker 1: So they're set in America. And then I'm almost finished

552
00:25:29,302 --> 00:25:31,022
Speaker 1: the one that she wrote before, which is called The

553
00:25:31,061 --> 00:25:33,661
Speaker 1: Most Fun We Ever Had, which is quite famous. She

554
00:25:33,702 --> 00:25:36,341
Speaker 1: wrote that in twenty nineteen, and that's like a multi

555
00:25:36,381 --> 00:25:40,141
Speaker 1: generational novel about the science and family. It focuses on

556
00:25:40,141 --> 00:25:42,902
Speaker 1: this couple called Marilyn and David. They're deeply in love

557
00:25:42,942 --> 00:25:45,221
Speaker 1: after forty years and they've got four daughters, and so

558
00:25:45,341 --> 00:25:48,101
Speaker 1: this is all about themes of sibling rivalry and hidden

559
00:25:48,141 --> 00:25:51,941
Speaker 1: struggles and you know, different timelines and secrets. There's a

560
00:25:51,982 --> 00:25:55,341
Speaker 1: bit more mystery in that one, but they're just really

561
00:25:55,621 --> 00:25:59,181
Speaker 1: really interesting, but a lot about marriage and relationships and parenting,

562
00:25:59,462 --> 00:26:00,982
Speaker 1: but parenting older children.

563
00:26:01,061 --> 00:26:03,382
Speaker 3: I took on your recommendation from last year and read

564
00:26:03,381 --> 00:26:05,061
Speaker 3: Margo's Got Money Trouble?

565
00:26:05,222 --> 00:26:05,981
Speaker 1: Yeah, did you like it?

566
00:26:06,022 --> 00:26:07,621
Speaker 3: And a few out louder said they didn't like it?

567
00:26:07,661 --> 00:26:09,941
Speaker 3: And I must say I'm team Mayer on that. I

568
00:26:09,982 --> 00:26:11,542
Speaker 3: love it so so good.

569
00:26:11,661 --> 00:26:13,742
Speaker 1: So that's being made into a movie or a TV

570
00:26:13,861 --> 00:26:16,901
Speaker 1: series with Nicole Kidman playing I assume the mother, and

571
00:26:16,942 --> 00:26:19,141
Speaker 1: I think it's Dakota Fanning playing Margo.

572
00:26:19,581 --> 00:26:22,701
Speaker 3: Oh nice, Yes, that works for me. I have a

573
00:26:22,742 --> 00:26:25,542
Speaker 3: free app, very late to the party, Deepop. Are either

574
00:26:25,542 --> 00:26:26,221
Speaker 3: of you on Deep Hop?

575
00:26:26,302 --> 00:26:26,341
Speaker 1: No?

576
00:26:26,462 --> 00:26:28,502
Speaker 2: What is Deepop? I've heard of it, but I have

577
00:26:28,621 --> 00:26:29,502
Speaker 2: never used it.

578
00:26:29,542 --> 00:26:31,742
Speaker 3: So the young cool people in the office, every time

579
00:26:31,782 --> 00:26:34,181
Speaker 3: you say where did you get that? Like, nice skirt,

580
00:26:34,302 --> 00:26:38,661
Speaker 3: nice shirt, they go Deep Hop. And I thought my

581
00:26:38,821 --> 00:26:41,782
Speaker 3: understanding was that it was an app where people like

582
00:26:41,982 --> 00:26:45,141
Speaker 3: bought and sold clothes. But I thought it was designer.

583
00:26:45,302 --> 00:26:46,901
Speaker 3: I thought it was very fancy clothes.

584
00:26:46,982 --> 00:26:49,701
Speaker 1: No, it's low end designer. So it's like label but

585
00:26:49,982 --> 00:26:50,982
Speaker 1: not fancy.

586
00:26:51,502 --> 00:26:51,702
Speaker 2: Yeah.

587
00:26:51,782 --> 00:26:54,621
Speaker 3: So I thought I kind of self excluded because I

588
00:26:54,661 --> 00:26:55,861
Speaker 3: was like, it doesn't sound like it's for me.

589
00:26:56,022 --> 00:26:57,381
Speaker 1: Is it like dish and witchery?

590
00:26:57,542 --> 00:27:01,742
Speaker 3: And and I have become obsessed with it. So I

591
00:27:01,821 --> 00:27:04,061
Speaker 3: am a big Facebook marketplace person and this year what

592
00:27:04,101 --> 00:27:06,702
Speaker 3: I'm trying really really hard to do is buy nothing new.

593
00:27:06,861 --> 00:27:09,821
Speaker 3: I think there are enough clothes in the world you

594
00:27:09,901 --> 00:27:12,622
Speaker 3: can do with just buying everything secondhand, and so I'm

595
00:27:12,621 --> 00:27:14,262
Speaker 3: getting them from me and getting them from.

596
00:27:14,141 --> 00:27:16,621
Speaker 2: You actually has a Perkins in the system.

597
00:27:16,381 --> 00:27:18,381
Speaker 3: Exactly right, And I love that. People like where'd you

598
00:27:18,381 --> 00:27:19,782
Speaker 3: get that? And I'm like, it's thrifted from me.

599
00:27:20,702 --> 00:27:23,182
Speaker 1: Yeah. A lot of my stuff isn't right for you,

600
00:27:23,302 --> 00:27:24,901
Speaker 1: like a lot. I mean, God, if I could give

601
00:27:24,942 --> 00:27:27,422
Speaker 1: you some clothes, I'd be stoked. But you've got very

602
00:27:27,422 --> 00:27:29,581
Speaker 1: specific tastes and you don't just take any old thing.

603
00:27:29,742 --> 00:27:30,581
Speaker 2: I don't. I don't.

604
00:27:30,942 --> 00:27:33,542
Speaker 3: But what I love about this is that there's sellers,

605
00:27:33,581 --> 00:27:35,341
Speaker 3: and so you can kind of follow a seller who's

606
00:27:35,341 --> 00:27:37,341
Speaker 3: got a whole lot of stuff that they're selling lots

607
00:27:37,341 --> 00:27:39,982
Speaker 3: of Australian based stuff. They do books, they do art,

608
00:27:40,061 --> 00:27:42,461
Speaker 3: they do all of it. So it's more kind of

609
00:27:42,542 --> 00:27:44,421
Speaker 3: clothes based and marketplace.

610
00:27:44,581 --> 00:27:46,422
Speaker 2: Do you know that it's going to be good quality?

611
00:27:46,422 --> 00:27:49,941
Speaker 2: Because the thing about secondhand and testing is if you

612
00:27:49,942 --> 00:27:52,701
Speaker 2: haven't touched it, felt it, smelt it, how do you

613
00:27:52,742 --> 00:27:54,581
Speaker 2: know it's going to be good? Is the reason Deepop

614
00:27:54,861 --> 00:27:57,302
Speaker 2: got a good reputation is because it's.

615
00:27:57,101 --> 00:27:57,861
Speaker 1: Yeah, it is good.

616
00:27:57,901 --> 00:28:00,821
Speaker 3: It's I've not heard of people having those experiences. Like

617
00:28:00,861 --> 00:28:03,422
Speaker 3: people are pretty honest. Like you get lots of photos

618
00:28:03,462 --> 00:28:05,581
Speaker 3: and that kind of thing, and so it'll have a price,

619
00:28:05,621 --> 00:28:07,981
Speaker 3: like it'll say this is fifty bucks, but you can

620
00:28:08,022 --> 00:28:10,581
Speaker 3: offer thirty or whatever. So you do of back and forth.

621
00:28:10,901 --> 00:28:12,981
Speaker 3: But I'm absolutely loving it. Really easy to use, and

622
00:28:13,022 --> 00:28:14,941
Speaker 3: then you get a bit of a I quite like

623
00:28:15,222 --> 00:28:17,581
Speaker 3: the algorithm then gives you a bunch of suggestions. So

624
00:28:17,661 --> 00:28:19,542
Speaker 3: it's like my most use app now. I just I

625
00:28:19,581 --> 00:28:20,702
Speaker 3: don't hardly buy anything.

626
00:28:20,742 --> 00:28:22,782
Speaker 1: What things have you been buying? Yeah, it's nice to

627
00:28:22,821 --> 00:28:23,302
Speaker 1: window shop.

628
00:28:23,381 --> 00:28:25,821
Speaker 3: I bought this dress the other day. You will find

629
00:28:25,821 --> 00:28:28,022
Speaker 3: pieces that like you're not going to find anywhere else,

630
00:28:28,061 --> 00:28:30,902
Speaker 3: that are cheap and that are probably like five years

631
00:28:30,942 --> 00:28:33,022
Speaker 3: old or whatever. That someone bought in the US.

632
00:28:33,262 --> 00:28:35,782
Speaker 2: Is it good for looking for something specific? Like if

633
00:28:35,821 --> 00:28:37,622
Speaker 2: I'm hunting, so I.

634
00:28:37,661 --> 00:28:41,302
Speaker 1: Needed from like it would be all that kind of stuff.

635
00:28:41,302 --> 00:28:43,342
Speaker 1: And so what I like about it is that it's

636
00:28:43,342 --> 00:28:46,142
Speaker 1: a you know, the real real does designer. That's if

637
00:28:46,142 --> 00:28:48,702
Speaker 1: you want to do second that the marketing second and designer.

638
00:28:49,222 --> 00:28:51,302
Speaker 1: But deep Hop is like fast fashion.

639
00:28:51,622 --> 00:28:54,622
Speaker 3: Yeah, fast fashion circular, which is really good. But like

640
00:28:54,661 --> 00:28:57,062
Speaker 3: I needed hiking boots over the break, and I could

641
00:28:57,102 --> 00:28:59,461
Speaker 3: buy any hiking boot I could buy in a shop.

642
00:28:59,942 --> 00:29:02,062
Speaker 3: I don't need brand new hiking boots. Yeah, so that

643
00:29:02,142 --> 00:29:02,941
Speaker 3: kind of stuff.

644
00:29:02,702 --> 00:29:05,622
Speaker 1: Was really tried. Selling some of your stuff.

645
00:29:05,462 --> 00:29:06,462
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think I will.

646
00:29:06,582 --> 00:29:10,741
Speaker 2: I don't have anything, but you'll buy the new just

647
00:29:10,782 --> 00:29:12,222
Speaker 2: clothes or everything in the world.

648
00:29:12,942 --> 00:29:14,782
Speaker 3: Well, I don't really buy a new furniture. I've always

649
00:29:14,822 --> 00:29:17,382
Speaker 3: done like Marketplace and stuff for furniture. I actually find

650
00:29:17,382 --> 00:29:18,142
Speaker 3: it more enjoyable.

651
00:29:18,462 --> 00:29:19,782
Speaker 1: But I'm going to try.

652
00:29:19,661 --> 00:29:21,302
Speaker 2: Generally like really good.

653
00:29:21,422 --> 00:29:25,822
Speaker 3: Yeahs it's making me all the consumerism it war So anyway,

654
00:29:25,942 --> 00:29:26,822
Speaker 3: Deep Hop great.

655
00:29:27,382 --> 00:29:29,582
Speaker 1: I'm actually going to be doing in the next few

656
00:29:29,582 --> 00:29:33,822
Speaker 1: months a big sale of all of my clothes too.

657
00:29:33,982 --> 00:29:35,942
Speaker 1: You need to get on Deepot raise money. I think

658
00:29:35,942 --> 00:29:38,421
Speaker 1: I'm going to do it with debay. Can I have

659
00:29:38,422 --> 00:29:40,942
Speaker 1: a fund to raise money. Well, I'm going to raise

660
00:29:40,982 --> 00:29:41,862
Speaker 1: money for a rise up.

661
00:29:42,262 --> 00:29:43,902
Speaker 2: I can give you money for rise up. I'll buy

662
00:29:44,022 --> 00:29:44,422
Speaker 2: from you.

663
00:29:44,422 --> 00:29:46,102
Speaker 1: You can have first look. Yeah, well it's going to

664
00:29:46,142 --> 00:29:47,542
Speaker 1: all be coming into the office and we're going to

665
00:29:47,702 --> 00:29:51,902
Speaker 1: we'll do we'll follow along on on socials as we

666
00:29:52,022 --> 00:29:53,741
Speaker 1: put it all together, because we've got a catalog at

667
00:29:53,742 --> 00:29:54,742
Speaker 1: all and photograph at all.

668
00:29:54,782 --> 00:29:57,741
Speaker 2: And I have said one of my recommendations, actually I

669
00:29:57,782 --> 00:29:59,421
Speaker 2: got a lot of it because I've missed me obviously in

670
00:29:59,422 --> 00:30:02,062
Speaker 2: the holidays is watching her try on all her jeens

671
00:30:02,102 --> 00:30:05,102
Speaker 2: on Instagram. I love them, waiting to know. I'm just

672
00:30:05,182 --> 00:30:06,822
Speaker 2: at home watching you try and jeans.

673
00:30:07,022 --> 00:30:09,062
Speaker 3: I must have blocked that contract from my peee.

674
00:30:09,102 --> 00:30:11,102
Speaker 2: And she was like she's tried on like every pair

675
00:30:11,102 --> 00:30:12,741
Speaker 2: of jeans in a closet. She's like, these ones are

676
00:30:12,742 --> 00:30:14,421
Speaker 2: too blue, these ones are too high, these and I

677
00:30:14,542 --> 00:30:15,661
Speaker 2: was like, love this content.

678
00:30:15,902 --> 00:30:19,421
Speaker 1: These ones are too hungry. And sometimes I would just

679
00:30:19,462 --> 00:30:21,902
Speaker 1: say this is never coming back because they wouldn't do

680
00:30:21,982 --> 00:30:22,342
Speaker 1: off you.

681
00:30:23,942 --> 00:30:25,862
Speaker 2: This is definitely out of style.

682
00:30:25,942 --> 00:30:28,542
Speaker 1: Now, Like okay, Holy's like I'll take that father.

683
00:30:28,661 --> 00:30:31,902
Speaker 2: I've just been watching me A's arsle holdays after the break,

684
00:30:32,062 --> 00:30:35,582
Speaker 2: a domestic goddess disaster, vacation mode, and New year disappointments.

685
00:30:35,622 --> 00:30:36,941
Speaker 2: It's best and worst.

686
00:30:38,102 --> 00:30:41,382
Speaker 3: Every Tuesday and Thursday, we drop new segments of MUMMYA

687
00:30:41,462 --> 00:30:44,982
Speaker 3: out Loud Just for MUMMYA subscribers. Follow the link in

688
00:30:45,022 --> 00:30:47,022
Speaker 3: the show notes to get your daily dose of out

689
00:30:47,062 --> 00:30:50,382
Speaker 3: Loud and a big thank you to all our current subscribers.

690
00:31:00,862 --> 00:31:03,661
Speaker 1: It's that part of the show where we reflect on

691
00:31:03,702 --> 00:31:06,422
Speaker 1: our week. Well, the years just started, but every week

692
00:31:06,582 --> 00:31:09,302
Speaker 1: has a high point and a low point or maybe

693
00:31:09,342 --> 00:31:12,582
Speaker 1: so rule and today out Loud as we are bringing

694
00:31:12,622 --> 00:31:14,622
Speaker 1: you the best and worst, not just of our week,

695
00:31:14,661 --> 00:31:17,382
Speaker 1: but from our whole summer break since we last spoke

696
00:31:17,422 --> 00:31:18,421
Speaker 1: to you basically.

697
00:31:18,102 --> 00:31:19,502
Speaker 3: Which was what three weeks ago.

698
00:31:19,702 --> 00:31:23,742
Speaker 1: Yeah, Jesse, let's kick off with you. What is your

699
00:31:23,782 --> 00:31:25,421
Speaker 1: worst of the summer break?

700
00:31:25,542 --> 00:31:28,302
Speaker 3: Okay, my worst it was the cricket.

701
00:31:28,702 --> 00:31:29,942
Speaker 1: Hear me out.

702
00:31:31,022 --> 00:31:35,062
Speaker 3: You think you thinks, corresponding that you're going to have

703
00:31:35,622 --> 00:31:38,902
Speaker 3: quality time with your partner. This might not be everyone's experience.

704
00:31:38,902 --> 00:31:41,022
Speaker 3: Some people love cricket, but this was just my experience.

705
00:31:41,422 --> 00:31:42,741
Speaker 3: Is it a gets a boxing day and you go,

706
00:31:42,782 --> 00:31:44,942
Speaker 3: we're away, We're up the coast me. You were there,

707
00:31:45,302 --> 00:31:47,022
Speaker 3: and I think this is going to be lovely. As

708
00:31:47,022 --> 00:31:48,941
Speaker 3: a family. We don't get a lot of these days

709
00:31:48,982 --> 00:31:53,261
Speaker 3: to just hang out, to reconnect, to go for swim,

710
00:31:53,382 --> 00:31:58,782
Speaker 3: to talk, to reflect on the universe. But instead there

711
00:31:58,902 --> 00:32:00,782
Speaker 3: is what seventeen hours of cricket.

712
00:32:00,822 --> 00:32:04,701
Speaker 2: Also, it was exciting, apparently a lot of shouting cricket.

713
00:32:04,702 --> 00:32:06,181
Speaker 2: This is not my sport, but there was a lot

714
00:32:06,222 --> 00:32:06,782
Speaker 2: of shouting in.

715
00:32:06,982 --> 00:32:12,741
Speaker 3: There was shouting and you just lose someone for days

716
00:32:12,782 --> 00:32:13,302
Speaker 3: at a time.

717
00:32:13,542 --> 00:32:15,981
Speaker 1: Oh see, this was my best, one of my best.

718
00:32:16,342 --> 00:32:20,102
Speaker 3: I found it so annoying. And then every year I go,

719
00:32:20,422 --> 00:32:22,501
Speaker 3: I like sport. I could get into this and I

720
00:32:22,542 --> 00:32:24,142
Speaker 3: sit down and I go, all right, what are we doing?

721
00:32:24,502 --> 00:32:27,142
Speaker 3: Are we doing about? And then we're doing a ball? Great,

722
00:32:27,182 --> 00:32:28,741
Speaker 3: what do we want this guy to do? What do

723
00:32:28,782 --> 00:32:31,262
Speaker 3: we want to happen here? And they say, well, if

724
00:32:31,262 --> 00:32:33,262
Speaker 3: he hits the stump spot and they explain it, then

725
00:32:33,342 --> 00:32:36,702
Speaker 3: something else happens and everyone cheers, and I'm like, I'm

726
00:32:36,702 --> 00:32:39,742
Speaker 3: not following. We went to the pub one day. I

727
00:32:39,742 --> 00:32:42,342
Speaker 3: think you were looking after Luna Maya and I was like,

728
00:32:42,422 --> 00:32:45,542
Speaker 3: let's reconnect, and so Luca and I went up to

729
00:32:45,582 --> 00:32:49,822
Speaker 3: the pub phone out watching the cricket like so antisocial.

730
00:32:49,982 --> 00:32:52,382
Speaker 1: See I didn't watch. I don't think a minute of it.

731
00:32:52,462 --> 00:32:53,582
Speaker 2: But what I really.

732
00:32:53,342 --> 00:32:57,342
Speaker 1: Love about the cricket is I love being around people

733
00:32:57,502 --> 00:32:59,982
Speaker 1: but not having to actually talk to them or engage

734
00:33:00,022 --> 00:33:02,302
Speaker 1: with them. I also like that not everybody's on the

735
00:33:02,342 --> 00:33:06,862
Speaker 1: individual devices. It's the only one of the few communal activities.

736
00:33:06,862 --> 00:33:10,181
Speaker 1: So the TV's on, the cricket's on. I don't know,

737
00:33:10,222 --> 00:33:12,221
Speaker 1: it just feels like summer to me. The noise of

738
00:33:12,222 --> 00:33:13,182
Speaker 1: it in the background.

739
00:33:13,342 --> 00:33:14,382
Speaker 3: I wish I was a part of it.

740
00:33:14,382 --> 00:33:15,862
Speaker 1: Reading my book. Oh no, I don't want to be

741
00:33:15,862 --> 00:33:17,902
Speaker 1: a part of it. So it's too stressful. I find

742
00:33:17,942 --> 00:33:19,462
Speaker 1: it enormously stressful.

743
00:33:19,502 --> 00:33:21,221
Speaker 2: I know there are lots of women who love cricket,

744
00:33:21,262 --> 00:33:23,582
Speaker 2: so I don't mean to stereotype, but I have the

745
00:33:23,582 --> 00:33:26,582
Speaker 2: same problem that you. My family loves cricket. It loves cricket,

746
00:33:26,582 --> 00:33:28,741
Speaker 2: Lots of my friends love criocket. The problem is that

747
00:33:28,782 --> 00:33:30,742
Speaker 2: when you walk in the room and you say who's winning,

748
00:33:30,982 --> 00:33:33,462
Speaker 2: they can't answer that question. Where is it? Every other

749
00:33:33,542 --> 00:33:36,142
Speaker 2: sport you can answer that question, Yeah, where are we?

750
00:33:36,222 --> 00:33:38,742
Speaker 3: What's happening? No one can answer it. And then suddenly

751
00:33:38,742 --> 00:33:42,262
Speaker 3: someone with like god, yeah, and then it finishes two

752
00:33:42,342 --> 00:33:44,661
Speaker 3: days early. Like I don't I don't understand how the

753
00:33:44,661 --> 00:33:49,702
Speaker 3: sport works. Okay, my best was actually my birthday. So

754
00:33:49,942 --> 00:33:52,142
Speaker 3: we broke just before my birthday. And I've spoken a

755
00:33:52,182 --> 00:33:52,661
Speaker 3: lot about this.

756
00:33:52,822 --> 00:33:54,862
Speaker 2: Is that not really just your birthday anymore? No?

757
00:33:55,022 --> 00:33:58,822
Speaker 3: Exactly right. All three make Clara Matilda our birthday. And

758
00:33:59,222 --> 00:34:00,862
Speaker 3: for pretty much as long as I've been with Luca,

759
00:34:01,142 --> 00:34:03,742
Speaker 3: haven't done anything for my birthday because I have this

760
00:34:04,062 --> 00:34:06,582
Speaker 3: fear that no one's going to come. Time of year,

761
00:34:06,982 --> 00:34:09,181
Speaker 3: all of that, and then I got to a week

762
00:34:09,222 --> 00:34:12,222
Speaker 3: out and I went, no, screw this. I love it

763
00:34:12,262 --> 00:34:14,302
Speaker 3: when someone has a birthday thing because I like going

764
00:34:15,142 --> 00:34:17,741
Speaker 3: and I can't just leave it to them. And so

765
00:34:17,942 --> 00:34:21,742
Speaker 3: I said, I'm going to this RSL on my birthday

766
00:34:21,781 --> 00:34:24,062
Speaker 3: for a drink at five o'clock. You can come or

767
00:34:24,102 --> 00:34:25,942
Speaker 3: you can not come. I'll be there with a margarita.

768
00:34:26,622 --> 00:34:27,622
Speaker 3: Pretty Much everyone came.

769
00:34:27,902 --> 00:34:28,622
Speaker 2: I couldn't believe it.

770
00:34:28,661 --> 00:34:31,822
Speaker 3: I looked around and they were like, that's fifteen twenty

771
00:34:31,862 --> 00:34:34,741
Speaker 3: people there. On the twenty first of December, which was

772
00:34:34,781 --> 00:34:39,782
Speaker 3: a Saturday night, had the most lovely night and didn't

773
00:34:39,822 --> 00:34:41,701
Speaker 3: go to bed with that regret of like maybe I

774
00:34:41,701 --> 00:34:44,142
Speaker 3: should have done something to celebrate or went to the Wiggles,

775
00:34:44,181 --> 00:34:45,542
Speaker 3: which was lovely today.

776
00:34:45,781 --> 00:34:49,022
Speaker 1: Yeah, my worst coincidentally, was that you didn't invite me.

777
00:34:49,382 --> 00:34:51,062
Speaker 3: Well, I needed a babysitter, didn't I.

778
00:34:52,062 --> 00:34:55,661
Speaker 1: Yeah, fair, I'll take one for the team. As Jessie said,

779
00:34:55,701 --> 00:34:58,461
Speaker 1: we were away up the North coast out of Oka

780
00:34:58,542 --> 00:35:01,941
Speaker 1: Beach with our family over the Christmas break. We've been

781
00:35:01,982 --> 00:35:05,382
Speaker 1: going up to Avocus since I was about four years old,

782
00:35:05,701 --> 00:35:08,781
Speaker 1: so almost fifty years. This year, on Christmas Eve, a

783
00:35:08,822 --> 00:35:11,142
Speaker 1: fifteen year old called Luca Bennett was swept off the

784
00:35:11,221 --> 00:35:14,462
Speaker 1: rocks with two of his friends up there. He drowned

785
00:35:14,582 --> 00:35:19,221
Speaker 1: and for the next few days until his body was recovered,

786
00:35:20,022 --> 00:35:23,181
Speaker 1: family and friends gathered on those rocks, which were just

787
00:35:23,342 --> 00:35:25,981
Speaker 1: about one hundred meters from where we were staying, and

788
00:35:27,221 --> 00:35:32,062
Speaker 1: it was so tragic. It was just the most tragic,

789
00:35:32,221 --> 00:35:35,661
Speaker 1: tragic thing that was just a reminder that things can

790
00:35:35,701 --> 00:35:38,461
Speaker 1: happen out of the blue. My youngest son is about

791
00:35:38,502 --> 00:35:42,142
Speaker 1: the same age I, like Luca, grew up going to

792
00:35:42,181 --> 00:35:47,381
Speaker 1: those rocks and it was just surreal to be having

793
00:35:47,382 --> 00:35:51,942
Speaker 1: this beautiful time with our family while watching the family

794
00:35:51,982 --> 00:35:56,781
Speaker 1: and friends of this young guy who just had his

795
00:35:56,822 --> 00:36:00,381
Speaker 1: whole life ahead of him. It was just incredibly confronting

796
00:36:00,661 --> 00:36:02,022
Speaker 1: and distressing.

797
00:36:02,102 --> 00:36:06,502
Speaker 3: And to have that nightmare unfold yeah from you, and

798
00:36:06,582 --> 00:36:09,781
Speaker 3: to see it, to watch the grief, oh yeah, over

799
00:36:09,902 --> 00:36:14,822
Speaker 3: days and the work of the lifeguards and the rescue crew,

800
00:36:14,942 --> 00:36:18,142
Speaker 3: and the amount of people that that tragedy touched.

801
00:36:18,022 --> 00:36:20,861
Speaker 1: And the different groups of people that would come. There

802
00:36:20,942 --> 00:36:24,221
Speaker 1: was a little memorial made with flowers, and they had

803
00:36:24,261 --> 00:36:27,582
Speaker 1: like a can of milow and his photo and people

804
00:36:27,622 --> 00:36:31,301
Speaker 1: writing messages, and the group of lifesavers would calm and

805
00:36:31,342 --> 00:36:33,542
Speaker 1: everyone would applaud them, and they had a vigil and

806
00:36:33,582 --> 00:36:36,862
Speaker 1: the parents and you know, our heart goes out to anybody.

807
00:36:36,862 --> 00:36:39,661
Speaker 1: There's never a good time or an easy time to

808
00:36:39,661 --> 00:36:42,741
Speaker 1: lose a loved one, but there's something about the poignancy

809
00:36:42,781 --> 00:36:46,062
Speaker 1: of it being around Christmas that was just devastating. My

810
00:36:46,342 --> 00:36:52,861
Speaker 1: best of my holiday break was not working, and I

811
00:36:53,261 --> 00:36:58,902
Speaker 1: just spent three straight weeks just with family and doing

812
00:36:58,982 --> 00:37:02,702
Speaker 1: nothing and producing nothing. And I usually have a really

813
00:37:02,701 --> 00:37:07,622
Speaker 1: hard time adjusting from the frantic nature of work to

814
00:37:08,102 --> 00:37:10,981
Speaker 1: switching off, and I always need to throw myself into

815
00:37:10,982 --> 00:37:15,582
Speaker 1: a project or teach myself a new thing, or start

816
00:37:15,622 --> 00:37:18,381
Speaker 1: a new idea or write something. And I had all

817
00:37:18,382 --> 00:37:20,662
Speaker 1: these plans for I was going to do this audio

818
00:37:20,701 --> 00:37:21,781
Speaker 1: s heres and I was going to do this and

819
00:37:21,822 --> 00:37:23,741
Speaker 1: that didn't do any of it. It was going to write

820
00:37:23,741 --> 00:37:26,102
Speaker 1: all these new newsletters, didn't do any of it. I

821
00:37:26,142 --> 00:37:28,821
Speaker 1: didn't post anything really except for that Jane's content, which

822
00:37:28,822 --> 00:37:31,062
Speaker 1: I'd actually made a couple of months before. I just

823
00:37:31,102 --> 00:37:35,382
Speaker 1: had forgotten about it, and I just felt really good.

824
00:37:35,862 --> 00:37:39,022
Speaker 1: I just let myself just not create anything, because so

825
00:37:39,102 --> 00:37:42,502
Speaker 1: much of my self worth and my just the only

826
00:37:42,542 --> 00:37:45,822
Speaker 1: thing I know how to do is make stuff and produce, produce, produce,

827
00:37:45,822 --> 00:37:48,261
Speaker 1: and work work work, work, work, And it was just

828
00:37:49,022 --> 00:37:51,502
Speaker 1: that special time when you can't get it at any

829
00:37:51,502 --> 00:37:53,622
Speaker 1: other time of the area, where its feel like if

830
00:37:53,622 --> 00:37:55,901
Speaker 1: you're fortunate enough to be able to have time off

831
00:37:55,902 --> 00:37:59,662
Speaker 1: over Christmas, it's like worth ten times that same amount

832
00:37:59,661 --> 00:38:01,181
Speaker 1: of time at any other time of year because no

833
00:38:01,221 --> 00:38:04,582
Speaker 1: one's else's working, so it's not like you need to

834
00:38:04,622 --> 00:38:06,462
Speaker 1: still check your inbox and you need to still be

835
00:38:06,502 --> 00:38:08,142
Speaker 1: on slack and you need to I could just come.

836
00:38:08,221 --> 00:38:09,821
Speaker 3: I thought your best was going to be me to

837
00:38:09,822 --> 00:38:10,701
Speaker 3: my family Christmas.

838
00:38:11,181 --> 00:38:11,421
Speaker 2: Oh.

839
00:38:11,542 --> 00:38:14,102
Speaker 1: I did love that. I did love coming to your

840
00:38:14,142 --> 00:38:16,822
Speaker 1: family Christmas and me, I mean I know those almost

841
00:38:16,862 --> 00:38:19,062
Speaker 1: everyone I met a couple of new people, but that

842
00:38:19,221 --> 00:38:21,622
Speaker 1: was great. I really loved it. Because we had to

843
00:38:21,781 --> 00:38:23,421
Speaker 1: we usually have a bunch of people at our place,

844
00:38:23,462 --> 00:38:26,221
Speaker 1: we had to cancel that, and so we decided because

845
00:38:26,221 --> 00:38:28,902
Speaker 1: I like a bit of Christmas year yep, So Coco

846
00:38:28,982 --> 00:38:31,261
Speaker 1: and I came to that on the way coast and

847
00:38:31,342 --> 00:38:32,102
Speaker 1: it was beautiful.

848
00:38:32,622 --> 00:38:35,942
Speaker 2: I'm very impressed by your best because you have often

849
00:38:35,982 --> 00:38:37,542
Speaker 2: said all the years i've known you that you really

850
00:38:37,542 --> 00:38:39,861
Speaker 2: struggle with holidays, and I remember you wrote about it

851
00:38:39,902 --> 00:38:41,741
Speaker 2: once and a lot of people felt really seen by

852
00:38:41,741 --> 00:38:43,982
Speaker 2: that because I think the default for all of us

853
00:38:44,022 --> 00:38:46,822
Speaker 2: is like we love holidays, love holidays, and I love holidays.

854
00:38:47,062 --> 00:38:52,781
Speaker 2: But it's really interesting that you're changing. Yeah, growing, she's growing, Jesse.

855
00:38:53,022 --> 00:38:54,902
Speaker 1: This time last year I was in a really bad place,

856
00:38:55,022 --> 00:38:57,821
Speaker 1: just I was just not great. And this year I

857
00:38:57,942 --> 00:39:01,741
Speaker 1: just really appreciated. I loved that for you, the unclenching.

858
00:39:02,062 --> 00:39:04,542
Speaker 2: Although I'm upset to know that my Geen's content wasn't

859
00:39:04,781 --> 00:39:09,301
Speaker 2: it wasn't fresh. My best and worst are actually into

860
00:39:10,022 --> 00:39:12,781
Speaker 2: because I'm going to do it a bit back to

861
00:39:12,822 --> 00:39:14,781
Speaker 2: from because my best was actually that Also, I had

862
00:39:14,781 --> 00:39:17,422
Speaker 2: three weeks of doing nothing, which was glorious, and I

863
00:39:17,422 --> 00:39:19,341
Speaker 2: also pretty much had three weeks at home. Now, we

864
00:39:19,422 --> 00:39:21,901
Speaker 2: nearly always go away holidays. Usually my parents come. It's

865
00:39:21,942 --> 00:39:24,622
Speaker 2: obviously really not great that they couldn't come this year,

866
00:39:24,661 --> 00:39:27,062
Speaker 2: but we had three very quiet weeks. We came out

867
00:39:27,062 --> 00:39:28,462
Speaker 2: with Sydney for a few days, but apart from that,

868
00:39:28,502 --> 00:39:31,542
Speaker 2: we were just home. And I loved being home, which

869
00:39:31,582 --> 00:39:33,902
Speaker 2: is growth for me because I do not really I

870
00:39:33,902 --> 00:39:36,262
Speaker 2: don't really love being I'm not really a home person,

871
00:39:36,502 --> 00:39:39,622
Speaker 2: but I'm becoming one. And I loved it. I loved it,

872
00:39:39,701 --> 00:39:42,341
Speaker 2: loved it. But the worst part of it is that

873
00:39:42,462 --> 00:39:45,741
Speaker 2: I also am overreaching in my domestic Godess, stay this,

874
00:39:45,942 --> 00:39:49,542
Speaker 2: I'm trying. I feared this woulden too hard and failing badly.

875
00:39:49,622 --> 00:39:51,982
Speaker 2: So we hosted for Christmas. We had our big potty

876
00:39:52,022 --> 00:39:53,822
Speaker 2: of our Sydney family friends.

877
00:39:53,862 --> 00:39:54,942
Speaker 3: How many people did you have?

878
00:39:55,342 --> 00:39:58,542
Speaker 2: We had three other families, so we had lots of children,

879
00:39:58,542 --> 00:40:00,582
Speaker 2: We had three dogs, We had like the whole thing

880
00:40:00,661 --> 00:40:02,382
Speaker 2: staying at our house for a few days.

881
00:40:02,622 --> 00:40:05,341
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry, Megan, show didn't drop before you could

882
00:40:05,342 --> 00:40:05,822
Speaker 3: have really.

883
00:40:05,661 --> 00:40:08,261
Speaker 2: Done with that. I made a Christmas lunch and that

884
00:40:08,302 --> 00:40:10,821
Speaker 2: all actually went quite well. One of my friends really

885
00:40:10,902 --> 00:40:12,902
Speaker 2: wanted pineapple and cheese on sticks. And I did that

886
00:40:12,982 --> 00:40:15,542
Speaker 2: and that looked really ugly, but it was delicious. Anyway.

887
00:40:15,661 --> 00:40:17,622
Speaker 2: That went really well. But then I got over confident,

888
00:40:18,261 --> 00:40:20,221
Speaker 2: and so later in the holidays when we had some

889
00:40:20,261 --> 00:40:22,221
Speaker 2: friends come to visit, some of Brent's friends we hadn't

890
00:40:22,221 --> 00:40:24,622
Speaker 2: seen for ages, and they came for like a late lunch,

891
00:40:24,822 --> 00:40:27,142
Speaker 2: and I said, I've got this. I'm going to do

892
00:40:27,181 --> 00:40:29,982
Speaker 2: a slow roasted lamb shoulder. You know, one of those

893
00:40:29,982 --> 00:40:31,861
Speaker 2: ones that falls apart you see on the TV and

894
00:40:31,902 --> 00:40:33,821
Speaker 2: you have with like a salad and a wrack. I'm

895
00:40:33,822 --> 00:40:37,102
Speaker 2: going to do that. No, they take a long time.

896
00:40:38,342 --> 00:40:39,582
Speaker 1: Did you start an hour before?

897
00:40:39,622 --> 00:40:42,022
Speaker 2: And I didn't ask. I've got a domestic goddess friend, Tory.

898
00:40:42,022 --> 00:40:43,622
Speaker 2: I should have asked her. I didn't ask her. Happened

899
00:40:43,661 --> 00:40:45,341
Speaker 2: to bump into her in the shops two hours into

900
00:40:45,342 --> 00:40:47,821
Speaker 2: this incident. I said, I'm making a slow ro slam

901
00:40:47,902 --> 00:40:51,142
Speaker 2: for lunch, because darling, you're not. You're not making a

902
00:40:51,221 --> 00:40:53,661
Speaker 2: slow row slam for lunch. It would have needed to

903
00:40:53,701 --> 00:40:56,422
Speaker 2: be in four hours or any So. Yeah, these lovely

904
00:40:56,462 --> 00:41:01,582
Speaker 2: people arrive. The lamb's raw. Oh no, everyone sits down.

905
00:41:01,622 --> 00:41:03,221
Speaker 2: I give everyone a drink, a bit of hummus. I'm like,

906
00:41:03,302 --> 00:41:06,022
Speaker 2: he'll be ready, and it was like five o'clock, still

907
00:41:06,062 --> 00:41:07,062
Speaker 2: not ready to have six.

908
00:41:06,862 --> 00:41:08,501
Speaker 1: O'clock, still not ready, like.

909
00:41:09,942 --> 00:41:13,622
Speaker 2: Was his lun And then I got really annoyed with

910
00:41:13,741 --> 00:41:17,422
Speaker 2: myself and everybody else saw ruined Brent. Obviously, I just

911
00:41:17,462 --> 00:41:19,542
Speaker 2: wanted everyone to go, but I didn't give them any food.

912
00:41:20,982 --> 00:41:23,341
Speaker 1: Did you make them leave with some raw lamb in

913
00:41:23,342 --> 00:41:23,982
Speaker 1: a billy.

914
00:41:23,822 --> 00:41:26,142
Speaker 2: And the man in the other family ross he went,

915
00:41:26,422 --> 00:41:28,301
Speaker 2: just can I look at this lamb? And I was

916
00:41:28,502 --> 00:41:32,542
Speaker 2: like no, And I was like okay, and he gets

917
00:41:32,542 --> 00:41:36,382
Speaker 2: it out and he goes babe shaking anyway, so he

918
00:41:36,462 --> 00:41:38,942
Speaker 2: sliced it anyway. So that was I overreached and it

919
00:41:39,022 --> 00:41:41,742
Speaker 2: was edible. It was edible, but it was like dry

920
00:41:41,942 --> 00:41:44,182
Speaker 2: and wrong and just not and I got very upset,

921
00:41:44,221 --> 00:41:45,862
Speaker 2: and then it was tense and everyone was tense, and

922
00:41:45,902 --> 00:41:47,341
Speaker 2: I had to send my friends a message the next

923
00:41:47,382 --> 00:41:49,582
Speaker 2: day saying I'm really sorry that I got so upset

924
00:41:49,582 --> 00:41:50,302
Speaker 2: about lunch.

925
00:41:51,181 --> 00:41:54,062
Speaker 1: Megan Martin doesn't have to worry about you cutting her.

926
00:41:53,982 --> 00:41:58,542
Speaker 3: Grass about thirty I thought that's just what lamb tasted like,

927
00:41:58,701 --> 00:42:01,221
Speaker 3: because I thought that lamb you chewed it for two

928
00:42:01,221 --> 00:42:03,221
Speaker 3: and a half minutes before swallowing it, because that's the

929
00:42:03,302 --> 00:42:04,782
Speaker 3: lamb my impatient mother made.

930
00:42:04,822 --> 00:42:07,822
Speaker 2: And Billy gets over stimulate. There was a disastrous afternoon

931
00:42:08,342 --> 00:42:10,582
Speaker 2: and then we killed a tree in the garden, like

932
00:42:10,622 --> 00:42:13,622
Speaker 2: because also overreaching. I thought I could repot this beautiful

933
00:42:13,661 --> 00:42:15,261
Speaker 2: little tree that lives in a pot and our thing

934
00:42:15,781 --> 00:42:19,182
Speaker 2: because the go back to work. The roots have broken

935
00:42:19,181 --> 00:42:20,821
Speaker 2: out of the pot and started going under the house.

936
00:42:20,862 --> 00:42:22,941
Speaker 2: I thought that can't be good, so I'll just saw

937
00:42:22,982 --> 00:42:30,221
Speaker 2: those off the tree and that's I'm not like, it's

938
00:42:30,221 --> 00:42:32,102
Speaker 2: actually really sad that the tree died. So now I'm

939
00:42:32,142 --> 00:42:34,901
Speaker 2: looking around for a new tree. I like I'm overreaching.

940
00:42:34,942 --> 00:42:37,582
Speaker 2: I'm trying too hard. So my best my to intertwined.

941
00:42:37,661 --> 00:42:40,142
Speaker 2: I love being home. It was peaceful, it was glorious.

942
00:42:40,342 --> 00:42:42,262
Speaker 2: But I need to get a hold of myself.

943
00:42:42,382 --> 00:42:46,542
Speaker 1: I am not to naturally recalibrate. I think it's tomato.

944
00:42:46,741 --> 00:42:51,861
Speaker 2: Back to lettuce tomatoes. I know you're right, that is it,

945
00:42:51,982 --> 00:42:54,461
Speaker 2: I think. For our wonderful Friday show, we hope you've

946
00:42:54,542 --> 00:42:56,861
Speaker 2: enjoyed it, and a massive thank you out loud As

947
00:42:56,862 --> 00:42:58,902
Speaker 2: for being back with us this week. We're going to

948
00:42:58,942 --> 00:43:00,861
Speaker 2: be back in your ears, of course on Monday, Jesse

949
00:43:01,022 --> 00:43:02,782
Speaker 2: and Mia read us out.

950
00:43:02,982 --> 00:43:05,661
Speaker 1: A big thank you to our team. Group executive producer

951
00:43:05,781 --> 00:43:08,142
Speaker 1: Ruth Divine, who says that the older she gets, the

952
00:43:08,142 --> 00:43:11,142
Speaker 1: bigger her, Let the fucket bucket becomes.

953
00:43:11,542 --> 00:43:15,222
Speaker 3: Executive producer Emmeline gazillis a fierce believer in let them.

954
00:43:15,221 --> 00:43:17,062
Speaker 3: How else do you think she deals with us?

955
00:43:18,261 --> 00:43:21,741
Speaker 1: Let those pictures, as she says. Our audio producer is

956
00:43:21,862 --> 00:43:25,142
Speaker 1: Leah Porges, who says that hanging onto friendships where it's

957
00:43:25,142 --> 00:43:27,062
Speaker 1: become a one way street, is a road to nowhere.

958
00:43:27,422 --> 00:43:29,821
Speaker 1: And so she says, I can't control their behavior, so

959
00:43:29,862 --> 00:43:31,301
Speaker 1: I don't try. She just lets them.

960
00:43:31,422 --> 00:43:34,622
Speaker 3: Video producer Josh Green is a musician, so yeah, everyone's

961
00:43:34,622 --> 00:43:36,781
Speaker 3: going to judge his performance, but who cares. He is

962
00:43:36,862 --> 00:43:38,901
Speaker 3: up on stage having fun. Let them hate it if

963
00:43:38,942 --> 00:43:41,821
Speaker 3: they want to, but we don't. We don't, No, we

964
00:43:41,902 --> 00:43:43,022
Speaker 3: don't love it.

965
00:43:43,102 --> 00:43:45,102
Speaker 2: Ow loud As. If you're not quite ready to say goodbye,

966
00:43:45,181 --> 00:43:47,901
Speaker 2: please remember that. This week on our subscriber episodes, we've

967
00:43:47,942 --> 00:43:50,062
Speaker 2: been unpacking all the topics, all the things that happened

968
00:43:50,062 --> 00:43:52,062
Speaker 2: in the news cycle that we were desperate to talk about.

969
00:43:52,102 --> 00:43:52,942
Speaker 1: Golden Globes.

970
00:43:53,062 --> 00:43:56,741
Speaker 2: So we talked about the Golden Globes gave her fashion rundown.

971
00:43:56,822 --> 00:43:59,341
Speaker 2: We talked about Hugh Jackman and the timing of that

972
00:43:59,542 --> 00:44:03,421
Speaker 2: very public outing. We talked about the divorce letter that

973
00:44:03,582 --> 00:44:06,781
Speaker 2: Ariana Grande's new boyfriend's ex wife wrote.

974
00:44:06,741 --> 00:44:09,182
Speaker 3: And the latest on the Justin Baldonian Blake Lively.

975
00:44:10,062 --> 00:44:12,502
Speaker 2: Links to those episodes are of course in the show notes.

976
00:44:12,502 --> 00:44:13,822
Speaker 2: We'll see you next week. Bye.

977
00:44:15,102 --> 00:44:18,261
Speaker 1: Shout out to any Mum and Maya subscribers listening. If

978
00:44:18,261 --> 00:44:20,862
Speaker 1: you love the show and want to support us as well,

979
00:44:21,062 --> 00:44:23,461
Speaker 1: subscribing to Mom and Miya is the very best way

980
00:44:23,502 --> 00:44:25,582
Speaker 1: to do so. There is a link in the episode

981
00:44:25,582 --> 00:44:26,022
Speaker 1: description