1 00:00:10,661 --> 00:00:13,341 Speaker 1: You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast. 2 00:00:13,822 --> 00:00:17,182 Speaker 2: Mamma Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters 3 00:00:17,222 --> 00:00:18,901 Speaker 2: that this podcast is recorded on. 4 00:00:19,302 --> 00:00:22,862 Speaker 3: Hello out Louders, It is Jesse here for your Sunday special. 5 00:00:22,982 --> 00:00:25,222 Speaker 3: Just a little trait for your Sunday. We are bringing 6 00:00:25,262 --> 00:00:28,062 Speaker 3: you a taste of a new podcast we are releasing. 7 00:00:28,182 --> 00:00:32,022 Speaker 3: It is called I Never Told You This. It's about connection, 8 00:00:32,422 --> 00:00:36,662 Speaker 3: It's about brave conversations and how to have more honest relationships. 9 00:00:36,781 --> 00:00:39,662 Speaker 3: We really hope you enjoy this episode and if you 10 00:00:39,702 --> 00:00:42,262 Speaker 3: want to continue listening to this series, it will be 11 00:00:42,382 --> 00:00:46,342 Speaker 3: dropping every Thursday over in our but Are You Happy? 12 00:00:46,502 --> 00:00:49,302 Speaker 3: Podcast feed will pop links to but Are You Happy? 13 00:00:49,342 --> 00:00:51,861 Speaker 3: In the show notes. Follow that show and you will 14 00:00:51,862 --> 00:00:53,461 Speaker 3: be alerted every time there's a new app. 15 00:00:55,142 --> 00:00:56,982 Speaker 4: I have anxiety myself. I don't even know what to 16 00:00:56,982 --> 00:00:58,342 Speaker 4: do with it. Do you know how to deal with it? 17 00:00:58,342 --> 00:00:59,782 Speaker 4: I feel like we don't really know how to deal 18 00:00:59,782 --> 00:01:01,502 Speaker 4: with it. We just kind of get up and just 19 00:01:01,542 --> 00:01:04,142 Speaker 4: seize the day. It doesn't matter how you're feeling. Soldier 20 00:01:04,262 --> 00:01:06,542 Speaker 4: on Two People, One big reveal. 21 00:01:06,862 --> 00:01:09,102 Speaker 2: I Never Told You This A simple card game where 22 00:01:09,102 --> 00:01:10,782 Speaker 2: one question could change everything. 23 00:01:11,102 --> 00:01:15,142 Speaker 5: It starts like, what's more things. 24 00:01:13,942 --> 00:01:14,902 Speaker 6: I'm not going to answer. 25 00:01:15,062 --> 00:01:18,782 Speaker 2: That then comes the moment that could shift a relationship forever. 26 00:01:19,022 --> 00:01:21,782 Speaker 2: As they finished this sentence, I never told you this. 27 00:01:21,982 --> 00:01:23,942 Speaker 6: I've never told you. They never told you this. 28 00:01:26,982 --> 00:01:30,702 Speaker 2: Today Reality TV influences mother and daughter duo Mary and 29 00:01:30,742 --> 00:01:34,102 Speaker 2: Martha Calipadidas will be sitting down together quite nervous. 30 00:01:34,102 --> 00:01:35,301 Speaker 6: But I'm always nervous. 31 00:01:35,902 --> 00:01:38,142 Speaker 2: Mary has something big to reveal to her daughter. 32 00:01:38,342 --> 00:01:40,862 Speaker 7: I don't think she's expecting me to say what I'm 33 00:01:40,902 --> 00:01:41,502 Speaker 7: going to say. 34 00:01:42,662 --> 00:01:43,422 Speaker 6: Welcome, Martha. 35 00:01:43,622 --> 00:01:45,622 Speaker 5: Oh, thanks for having me Mary. This is a bit 36 00:01:45,902 --> 00:01:46,342 Speaker 5: new for. 37 00:01:46,422 --> 00:01:47,742 Speaker 6: Us, I know. Welcome. 38 00:01:48,462 --> 00:01:51,622 Speaker 7: So today we're going to play a little game with 39 00:01:51,742 --> 00:01:53,502 Speaker 7: the Medibank family roast cards. 40 00:01:53,542 --> 00:01:54,622 Speaker 6: Are you ready to play? 41 00:01:54,822 --> 00:01:56,982 Speaker 5: Yes, let's get into this game. I think we need 42 00:01:57,022 --> 00:01:57,702 Speaker 5: a little game. 43 00:01:57,902 --> 00:01:58,622 Speaker 6: So who picks? 44 00:01:58,702 --> 00:01:58,902 Speaker 1: There? 45 00:01:59,022 --> 00:01:59,742 Speaker 5: You go for it? 46 00:01:59,862 --> 00:02:03,142 Speaker 6: Oh? Are you ready? Oh? 47 00:02:03,182 --> 00:02:06,902 Speaker 7: What is the most ridiculous fashion trend you ever followed? 48 00:02:07,102 --> 00:02:10,661 Speaker 4: Those thick faust belts that were like a boob troop 49 00:02:10,702 --> 00:02:12,862 Speaker 4: and we'd wear them over the jeans. That has to 50 00:02:12,901 --> 00:02:15,262 Speaker 4: be one of the ugliest things I ever did. I'm 51 00:02:15,262 --> 00:02:17,422 Speaker 4: five foot two and that made me four foot two. 52 00:02:17,622 --> 00:02:20,702 Speaker 7: I probably told you, but you wouldn't probably listen here 53 00:02:20,742 --> 00:02:20,982 Speaker 7: we go. 54 00:02:21,062 --> 00:02:22,822 Speaker 5: She had to throw that one in my face. 55 00:02:22,822 --> 00:02:24,661 Speaker 6: Just saying kid, just saying. 56 00:02:24,822 --> 00:02:27,662 Speaker 4: All right, so I'll pick a card. Oh, what is 57 00:02:27,782 --> 00:02:30,942 Speaker 4: something I do that grosses you out? I don't think 58 00:02:31,022 --> 00:02:32,422 Speaker 4: you do anything they do not. 59 00:02:32,822 --> 00:02:35,062 Speaker 5: No, that's right, good answer, Mary. 60 00:02:35,222 --> 00:02:35,862 Speaker 6: What about me? 61 00:02:36,422 --> 00:02:39,102 Speaker 5: I don't because I can say so many things. 62 00:02:39,062 --> 00:02:40,341 Speaker 6: I bring it to the table. 63 00:02:40,582 --> 00:02:42,622 Speaker 5: Cutting your cuticles, well. 64 00:02:42,422 --> 00:02:43,782 Speaker 6: That's just like meditation. 65 00:02:43,942 --> 00:02:45,622 Speaker 4: If you go and get that done and then you 66 00:02:45,782 --> 00:02:48,142 Speaker 4: like to do more and just keep cutting the cuticles, 67 00:02:48,181 --> 00:02:50,862 Speaker 4: it must be a nervous It's definitely a nervous habit. 68 00:02:50,982 --> 00:02:53,182 Speaker 6: Okay, I'll take that, all. 69 00:02:53,142 --> 00:02:54,142 Speaker 2: Right, go next? 70 00:02:54,262 --> 00:02:55,221 Speaker 6: Oh is that me? 71 00:02:55,662 --> 00:02:55,822 Speaker 1: Oh? 72 00:02:56,342 --> 00:03:00,542 Speaker 6: What do you think your most useless talent is? You've 73 00:03:00,542 --> 00:03:01,302 Speaker 6: got plenty of those. 74 00:03:01,422 --> 00:03:03,502 Speaker 4: I don't think I've got any. I just there's no 75 00:03:03,542 --> 00:03:05,582 Speaker 4: timeless for uselessness in our family. 76 00:03:05,862 --> 00:03:06,462 Speaker 6: I agree. 77 00:03:06,662 --> 00:03:07,542 Speaker 5: What about how you. 78 00:03:07,462 --> 00:03:10,742 Speaker 4: Can you start singing every single commercial song that's ever 79 00:03:10,862 --> 00:03:15,302 Speaker 4: come on since like nineteen eighty fifties from the Earth. 80 00:03:16,702 --> 00:03:22,022 Speaker 6: I'm going to pick the next card. I never told 81 00:03:22,062 --> 00:03:22,622 Speaker 6: you this. 82 00:03:26,822 --> 00:03:32,102 Speaker 7: When you went on reality TV, all these comments would 83 00:03:32,142 --> 00:03:34,142 Speaker 7: come in on social media. 84 00:03:34,302 --> 00:03:38,022 Speaker 6: It actually affected me, but I didn't want to show 85 00:03:38,062 --> 00:03:38,982 Speaker 6: you that it. 86 00:03:38,742 --> 00:03:42,142 Speaker 7: Was affecting me, all these comments that were coming in, 87 00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:44,782 Speaker 7: and I'd be staying up till three four in the morning, 88 00:03:44,982 --> 00:03:48,862 Speaker 7: and I didn't realize how toxic social media can be. 89 00:03:49,102 --> 00:03:53,062 Speaker 7: I didn't know as a parent how I can comfort you. 90 00:03:53,102 --> 00:03:55,662 Speaker 4: No, I can totally understand how that would have affected you. 91 00:03:56,222 --> 00:03:59,662 Speaker 4: With the trolls on the internet, they think they know me, 92 00:03:59,902 --> 00:04:02,062 Speaker 4: but you really know me, and so you were reading 93 00:04:02,102 --> 00:04:04,542 Speaker 4: things that weren't true, and then that would be just 94 00:04:04,662 --> 00:04:05,662 Speaker 4: endless cycle. 95 00:04:05,862 --> 00:04:08,582 Speaker 6: Now you're a parent, and I'm sure you would probably 96 00:04:08,622 --> 00:04:08,902 Speaker 6: do the. 97 00:04:08,902 --> 00:04:11,822 Speaker 4: Same now that I'm a parent, I just want to 98 00:04:11,862 --> 00:04:13,982 Speaker 4: protect him from everything. 99 00:04:13,582 --> 00:04:14,822 Speaker 6: I could only imagine. 100 00:04:14,862 --> 00:04:16,421 Speaker 7: And that's why I didn't want to burden you with 101 00:04:16,822 --> 00:04:20,381 Speaker 7: I've got anxiety, I can't sleep, I was I had 102 00:04:20,421 --> 00:04:21,822 Speaker 7: shortness of breath, like I was. 103 00:04:21,741 --> 00:04:24,582 Speaker 6: Thinking a mom, don't yeah, but that's how it was. 104 00:04:26,022 --> 00:04:28,301 Speaker 4: I think to some degree, I did have some idea, 105 00:04:28,301 --> 00:04:32,061 Speaker 4: because you did start acting really strange. I definitely think 106 00:04:32,181 --> 00:04:35,062 Speaker 4: I know you were staying up really late looking at comments, 107 00:04:35,142 --> 00:04:38,502 Speaker 4: and I remember just being too like, don't worry about it, man, 108 00:04:38,621 --> 00:04:42,741 Speaker 4: like it's fine. But I think at the time I 109 00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:45,301 Speaker 4: didn't want to show you either that it was affecting me, 110 00:04:45,501 --> 00:04:47,301 Speaker 4: so I would just say oh to you, like it 111 00:04:47,301 --> 00:04:49,741 Speaker 4: doesn't matter, but really, like I would be in my 112 00:04:49,941 --> 00:04:52,662 Speaker 4: room staying up breathing the comments as well. So I 113 00:04:52,702 --> 00:04:54,461 Speaker 4: have anxiety myself. I don't even know what to do 114 00:04:54,501 --> 00:04:55,701 Speaker 4: with it. Do you know how to deal with it? 115 00:04:55,702 --> 00:04:57,142 Speaker 4: I feel like we don't really know how to deal 116 00:04:57,142 --> 00:04:58,941 Speaker 4: with it. We just kind of move on with the 117 00:04:59,022 --> 00:05:00,901 Speaker 4: day and just keep the day going. But it doesn't 118 00:05:00,941 --> 00:05:02,462 Speaker 4: mean that the anxiety. 119 00:05:01,941 --> 00:05:02,702 Speaker 5: Goes away. 120 00:05:07,541 --> 00:05:09,541 Speaker 1: The rest of this episode of I never told you 121 00:05:09,621 --> 00:05:11,382 Speaker 1: this right after the break. 122 00:05:14,741 --> 00:05:17,581 Speaker 7: Thinking back, I should have just been more open and 123 00:05:17,621 --> 00:05:20,061 Speaker 7: told you, like, you know what, it's normal to feel 124 00:05:20,142 --> 00:05:22,101 Speaker 7: this way because I'm feeling this way. 125 00:05:22,262 --> 00:05:22,462 Speaker 6: Yeah. 126 00:05:22,501 --> 00:05:24,462 Speaker 4: I think if this had done that, we probably would 127 00:05:24,501 --> 00:05:26,862 Speaker 4: have been able to, you know, commune and cack it 128 00:05:26,981 --> 00:05:28,981 Speaker 4: and then just deal with it in the open instead 129 00:05:29,022 --> 00:05:30,382 Speaker 4: of dealing with it separately in. 130 00:05:30,381 --> 00:05:31,501 Speaker 6: Our different rooms. 131 00:05:31,741 --> 00:05:34,822 Speaker 4: Yeah, but that's very That's very much what our family does, 132 00:05:34,902 --> 00:05:39,022 Speaker 4: though we're not very good at revealing, which is strange 133 00:05:39,381 --> 00:05:43,541 Speaker 4: because we're so open, that's about everything, about movements and everything, 134 00:05:43,702 --> 00:05:46,382 Speaker 4: because we've brought up to be like quite hard and 135 00:05:46,462 --> 00:05:47,821 Speaker 4: like strong and tarody. 136 00:05:48,061 --> 00:05:50,101 Speaker 6: No, you can't get over it, get up. 137 00:05:49,981 --> 00:05:52,222 Speaker 5: And just seize the day. It doesn't matter how you're feeling. 138 00:05:52,541 --> 00:05:53,062 Speaker 6: Soldier on. 139 00:05:54,101 --> 00:05:56,861 Speaker 7: When I was growing up, our parents were very strict. 140 00:05:56,902 --> 00:05:59,342 Speaker 7: They never showed emotion. They never you know, I. 141 00:05:59,342 --> 00:06:00,541 Speaker 5: Just find that hard to believe. 142 00:06:00,621 --> 00:06:04,662 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, it is like the most softest, sweetest, gentlest, emotional, 143 00:06:05,222 --> 00:06:06,222 Speaker 4: loving caring. 144 00:06:06,342 --> 00:06:07,621 Speaker 6: It wasn't when we were growing up. 145 00:06:07,662 --> 00:06:09,342 Speaker 5: I just find it hard to believe. 146 00:06:10,501 --> 00:06:11,342 Speaker 6: She was strict. 147 00:06:11,421 --> 00:06:15,942 Speaker 5: Get up old age, it really softens you. 148 00:06:16,022 --> 00:06:19,181 Speaker 6: It breaks you down. 149 00:06:20,782 --> 00:06:24,141 Speaker 7: With like searching and being like my own little detective. 150 00:06:24,582 --> 00:06:27,381 Speaker 7: I noticed that a lot of these comments weren't coming 151 00:06:27,421 --> 00:06:30,142 Speaker 7: from young kids that were just being mean. 152 00:06:30,262 --> 00:06:32,662 Speaker 6: These were from parents that had kids. 153 00:06:32,902 --> 00:06:36,821 Speaker 7: How could you try and destroy someone else's child. People 154 00:06:36,861 --> 00:06:39,941 Speaker 7: want kids to be kind, but they don't teach them 155 00:06:40,142 --> 00:06:42,902 Speaker 7: the tools to be kind and not to bring other 156 00:06:42,941 --> 00:06:45,381 Speaker 7: people down, you know, like kids are mean today. 157 00:06:46,022 --> 00:06:48,261 Speaker 5: I hate that I was even that from somewhere. 158 00:06:48,342 --> 00:06:50,981 Speaker 7: Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. The parents are the 159 00:06:50,981 --> 00:06:52,941 Speaker 7: ones that need to actually change. 160 00:06:53,621 --> 00:06:55,381 Speaker 4: I kind of feel a bit sad for you in 161 00:06:55,381 --> 00:06:56,941 Speaker 4: a way that you kind of dealt with that on 162 00:06:56,981 --> 00:06:57,382 Speaker 4: your own. 163 00:06:58,541 --> 00:07:00,941 Speaker 6: That's what parents do, you know. 164 00:07:01,022 --> 00:07:04,061 Speaker 7: They try to protect I think their kids as much 165 00:07:04,061 --> 00:07:08,101 Speaker 7: as they can. You know, so if your son was 166 00:07:08,142 --> 00:07:11,941 Speaker 7: dealing with anxiety, how would you help him? 167 00:07:12,381 --> 00:07:13,021 Speaker 5: Growing up? 168 00:07:13,222 --> 00:07:17,182 Speaker 4: You always said those that matter don't mind, and those 169 00:07:17,222 --> 00:07:19,942 Speaker 4: that mind don't matter. It doesn't really matter because who 170 00:07:19,982 --> 00:07:22,302 Speaker 4: are these people to you? As long as like you know, you, 171 00:07:22,302 --> 00:07:24,742 Speaker 4: your friends, your family, the people that you care about, 172 00:07:25,182 --> 00:07:27,622 Speaker 4: the opinions of others don't really matter. 173 00:07:28,742 --> 00:07:32,422 Speaker 6: That's good. At least you've got something something from all 174 00:07:32,462 --> 00:07:36,422 Speaker 6: those years. Yeah, it's not easy being a parent. 175 00:07:36,502 --> 00:07:38,862 Speaker 4: It's so not It's the hardest thing ever. It's so 176 00:07:38,982 --> 00:07:42,022 Speaker 4: not easy being a parent. I appreciate it. 177 00:07:42,582 --> 00:07:47,982 Speaker 5: Oh, thank you, Mary, no worries any time. Yeah. 178 00:07:48,502 --> 00:07:51,342 Speaker 4: And it's nice to know that you're human under all that. Yeah, 179 00:07:51,342 --> 00:07:53,381 Speaker 4: it's nice to know that under all there there is 180 00:07:53,462 --> 00:07:55,062 Speaker 4: actually some flesh and blood. 181 00:07:56,182 --> 00:07:57,261 Speaker 5: Well done, fish pump. 182 00:07:57,702 --> 00:07:59,341 Speaker 6: Oh is that something we do still? 183 00:08:06,102 --> 00:08:09,021 Speaker 1: This episode was brought to you by Medibank Live Better 184 00:08:09,102 --> 00:08:12,662 Speaker 1: with Medie. If this conversation brought up any strong feelings 185 00:08:12,702 --> 00:08:15,542 Speaker 1: for you, don't forget there is help out there. Please 186 00:08:15,542 --> 00:08:17,102 Speaker 1: see show notes for resources.