WEBVTT - The Lightning Fast Labour That Ended on the Ensuite Floor 0:00:21.773 --> 0:00:24.493 You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast. 0:00:25.212 --> 0:00:28.413 Mamma Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters 0:00:28.453 --> 0:00:31.452 that this podcast is recorded on. We pay our respects 0:00:31.533 --> 0:00:35.092 to elders past, present and emerging, and feel privileged to 0:00:35.132 --> 0:00:38.253 continue the sharing of birth stories and knowledge that has 0:00:38.293 --> 0:00:40.852 been a fundamental part of indigenous culture. 0:00:45.373 --> 0:00:49.253 Hi. I'm Kassenya Lukitch, and this is diary of a birth. 0:00:50.173 --> 0:00:53.092 Sometimes the birth you plan and the birth you get 0:00:53.333 --> 0:00:56.653 a world's apart, but that doesn't mean it can't still 0:00:56.693 --> 0:01:00.933 be empowering. Today's guest wanted a calm home birth with 0:01:01.013 --> 0:01:04.693 her private midwife after feeling unsupported in the public system. 0:01:05.533 --> 0:01:08.493 She had her birth already, fairy lights set up, and 0:01:08.613 --> 0:01:12.532 her care team on standby, but when labor finally started 0:01:12.693 --> 0:01:17.013 forty one weeks, everything happened faster than anyone expected. 0:01:17.693 --> 0:01:20.253 So I called my husband just after midday. I was 0:01:20.253 --> 0:01:23.493 in the show at quarter past twelve. I crawled out 0:01:23.493 --> 0:01:26.893 of the shower at twelve thirty five, and my water 0:01:26.972 --> 0:01:29.333 broke just as I got out of the shower, all 0:01:29.372 --> 0:01:31.773 over the on sweet floor. And then straight after my 0:01:31.812 --> 0:01:34.813 water brokes, I felt the urged push. 0:01:34.853 --> 0:01:38.133 With her midwife stuck in traffic and her husband racing 0:01:38.133 --> 0:01:41.812 home from work. She found herself alone on her bathroom floor, 0:01:42.493 --> 0:01:46.973 hoping help would arrive in time. So let's meet today's mum. 0:01:47.773 --> 0:01:50.413 Hi, my name is Lauren and this is the diary 0:01:50.493 --> 0:01:56.893 of my birth with Finley. 0:01:56.972 --> 0:02:00.373 So, Lauren, Finley is your second child. 0:02:00.653 --> 0:02:01.653 He is, Yes. 0:02:02.093 --> 0:02:04.093 Can you just tell us a little bit about what 0:02:04.173 --> 0:02:06.933 life was like before you fell pregnant with Finley. 0:02:07.213 --> 0:02:11.013 So there's almost four years between Finley and his big 0:02:11.053 --> 0:02:15.413 sister Emerson. So before I fell pregnant with Finley, it 0:02:15.573 --> 0:02:18.653 was my husband, myself and our at the time three 0:02:18.733 --> 0:02:21.453 year old. She was a little bit of an unicornchild. 0:02:21.493 --> 0:02:23.613 I hate to put this into the universe, but she 0:02:24.733 --> 0:02:27.813 ate well, slept well, was fun to be around. So 0:02:27.893 --> 0:02:30.213 we decided it was time that we were ready to 0:02:30.333 --> 0:02:33.373 introduce a second child, a fourth member of the family. 0:02:33.733 --> 0:02:36.013 And of course, a month after I fell pregnant with 0:02:36.093 --> 0:02:38.613 Finley is when the three year old attitude kicked in. 0:02:38.852 --> 0:02:41.052 But we wouldn't have had it any other way. 0:02:42.532 --> 0:02:45.412 So can you tell me about what you wanted your 0:02:45.453 --> 0:02:49.333 experience to be like with Finley? What type of birth 0:02:49.453 --> 0:02:50.452 did you want to have? 0:02:50.852 --> 0:02:53.693 I guess that's informed a lot by the birth that 0:02:53.773 --> 0:02:57.333 I did have with Emerson. Going into my first pregnancy 0:02:57.373 --> 0:03:01.893 in birth, I was very open to, you know, let's 0:03:01.893 --> 0:03:04.813 see how things go. My birth plan was very don't 0:03:04.813 --> 0:03:08.733 offer me pain relief, don't offer me interventions. If I 0:03:08.773 --> 0:03:11.693 want them, I'll ask for them. I went through a 0:03:11.733 --> 0:03:14.612 private hospital and a private obstetrician with my first birth 0:03:14.692 --> 0:03:17.532 because in the circles I run in the area I 0:03:17.572 --> 0:03:19.333 live in, that's just what you did if you had 0:03:19.333 --> 0:03:23.373 private health insurance. And I was fairly lucky with my experience. 0:03:23.613 --> 0:03:26.532 I had a good relationship with my obstetricians right up 0:03:26.613 --> 0:03:29.853 until I think it was thirty seven and a half 0:03:29.933 --> 0:03:33.613 weeks of pregnancy, and then I should just preface this. 0:03:33.692 --> 0:03:36.733 My daughter was due the day after New Year's I 0:03:36.773 --> 0:03:39.053 started getting a lot of pressure from the private obstetric 0:03:39.213 --> 0:03:43.093 that I'd worked with to induce prior to Christmas and 0:03:43.133 --> 0:03:45.933 prior to the public holidays. I was quite resistant to that, 0:03:46.293 --> 0:03:49.413 but I did feel like I was pushed or coerced 0:03:49.453 --> 0:03:52.493 a little bit into an induction. It did work in 0:03:52.533 --> 0:03:55.093 my favor. When I went in to be induced, they 0:03:55.093 --> 0:03:57.693 found out I was already actually in labor, so they 0:03:57.733 --> 0:04:00.693 manually broke my waters. No other intervention, and two and 0:04:00.693 --> 0:04:04.133 a half hours later, my daughter was born. So when 0:04:04.133 --> 0:04:07.573 it came time to plan for our care with Finley, 0:04:07.573 --> 0:04:10.133 I knew I wanted to do it differently. I knew 0:04:10.173 --> 0:04:12.613 I wanted to be the expert on my body. I 0:04:12.653 --> 0:04:16.493 wanted to trust my body to birth, and I wanted 0:04:16.533 --> 0:04:18.973 to make sure that I had health support, obviously from 0:04:18.973 --> 0:04:21.653 an expert, but one little so trusted me to be 0:04:21.733 --> 0:04:24.573 an expert in what my body was experiencing and on 0:04:24.773 --> 0:04:27.093 how my baby and I were going to work together 0:04:27.373 --> 0:04:29.813 for him to be born. In my area as well, 0:04:29.853 --> 0:04:33.733 we do have a publicly funded home birth program which 0:04:33.773 --> 0:04:36.973 is very close to my house, and I was very 0:04:37.133 --> 0:04:39.093 very keen. I think even before I knew I was pregnant, 0:04:39.133 --> 0:04:40.773 I was like, right, next time around, this is what 0:04:40.813 --> 0:04:45.013 I'm meaning for. I'd started working with a prenatal and 0:04:45.093 --> 0:04:47.653 pregnancy birth dueler at this point. 0:04:47.413 --> 0:04:50.653 So basically the plan was you went into the public system. 0:04:50.733 --> 0:04:52.533 The plan was going to be that you were going 0:04:52.533 --> 0:04:58.173 to try and do a vaginal unmedicated birth in the hospital. 0:04:58.333 --> 0:05:00.013 Yes, originally in the hospital, but. 0:05:00.173 --> 0:05:04.213 With a duela supporting you throughout the process. Yes. Okay, 0:05:04.253 --> 0:05:06.573 so you're at sixteen weeks. At this point, you and 0:05:06.613 --> 0:05:09.533 your husband say we need to go and find a 0:05:09.733 --> 0:05:12.013 private midwife. What was your next step? 0:05:12.333 --> 0:05:16.173 Then? I was very lucky. I obviously had already linked 0:05:16.173 --> 0:05:18.493 in with a Duela. I also have a friend I 0:05:18.533 --> 0:05:20.093 went to your high school with who works as a 0:05:20.133 --> 0:05:22.333 post part of Duela in the area that I live in. 0:05:22.693 --> 0:05:25.173 So I reached out to her for recommendations and she 0:05:25.413 --> 0:05:28.573 gave me a list of a few private practicing midwives 0:05:28.613 --> 0:05:31.213 that service our area, and I reached out to I 0:05:31.213 --> 0:05:34.213 think three or four of them and clicked with one 0:05:34.453 --> 0:05:37.493 and engaged her to move forward. It was really comfortable. 0:05:37.933 --> 0:05:41.533 All of the midwives were lovely. Obviously, most private practicing 0:05:41.573 --> 0:05:44.453 midwives in our area at least tend to lean high 0:05:44.573 --> 0:05:48.173 to homebirths because a lot of the reason that people 0:05:49.013 --> 0:05:51.813 engage private midwives is because they want to go outside 0:05:51.853 --> 0:05:54.333 of the hospital system or have the hospital system as 0:05:54.333 --> 0:05:57.373 the escalation pathway if and when it's needed. 0:05:57.653 --> 0:06:03.053 What does a private midwife cost, Because obviously, even when 0:06:03.053 --> 0:06:05.333 we talk about going through the private system and having 0:06:05.333 --> 0:06:07.893 an obstetrition, there is still out of pocket expenses which 0:06:07.933 --> 0:06:09.533 a lot of people don't realize. I think just because 0:06:09.533 --> 0:06:10.493 you have health insurance. 0:06:10.733 --> 0:06:14.653 Oh absolutely, health insurance covers the hospital birth. It does 0:06:14.693 --> 0:06:16.013 not cover the obstetrician. 0:06:16.293 --> 0:06:19.813 I remember doing the calculations and with all of the scans, 0:06:20.013 --> 0:06:24.133 you know, to test all of that, plus the obstetrician, 0:06:24.173 --> 0:06:27.453 plus the anethetist, it was about ten thousand dollars out 0:06:27.453 --> 0:06:29.093 of pocket per birth. 0:06:28.893 --> 0:06:30.973 Plus the private health insurance that you've had to pay 0:06:31.013 --> 0:06:33.173 for for at least work twelve months before and then 0:06:33.253 --> 0:06:38.093 actually being pregnant. So absolutely it's phenomenal. So in perspective, 0:06:38.333 --> 0:06:41.413 the private practicing midwife for the whole pregnancy, birth, and 0:06:41.573 --> 0:06:45.133 six weeks postpardon was six thousand dollars. And there are 0:06:45.253 --> 0:06:48.733 Medicare rebates available for pre and postnatal care, so I 0:06:48.773 --> 0:06:51.493 think I got about sixteen hundred dollars back from Medicare. 0:06:51.613 --> 0:06:54.253 Birth is not covered by Medicare, but the pre and 0:06:54.293 --> 0:06:57.853 post natal care that a privately practicing midwife provides is okay, 0:06:58.213 --> 0:07:01.973 so you get a lot more. In my opinion, having 0:07:02.013 --> 0:07:05.613 gone through the private system birth and then the private midwife, 0:07:05.653 --> 0:07:08.093 I felt like I got much better value for money 0:07:08.093 --> 0:07:11.253 with the care that I received with a private practicing midwife. 0:07:11.373 --> 0:07:14.333 Yeah, it's interesting just to see the comparisons of costs, 0:07:14.333 --> 0:07:16.453 because I think a lot of people would say, oh, 0:07:16.493 --> 0:07:20.373 private midwife, that's going to be way outside my budget. 0:07:20.853 --> 0:07:23.413 But I suppose if you are in a lower risk category 0:07:23.453 --> 0:07:26.973 and you do want a low intervention or potentially want 0:07:27.053 --> 0:07:28.773 to go for a home birth, that could be a 0:07:28.813 --> 0:07:32.333 really good option for some women. Let's get to the 0:07:32.373 --> 0:07:36.253 birth itself. How far along were you when you started 0:07:36.293 --> 0:07:37.333 feeling labor. 0:07:37.893 --> 0:07:41.253 I think the first night I had contractions was at 0:07:41.293 --> 0:07:45.813 forty weeks and three days. Again for background, when I 0:07:45.893 --> 0:07:48.213 went to be induced and was in labor with my daughter, 0:07:48.253 --> 0:07:51.613 I was thirty seven and six, so myself, my husband, 0:07:51.613 --> 0:07:53.933 and my midwife were all quite surprised when forty weeks 0:07:53.933 --> 0:07:56.933 came and went with nothing. I had, I guess what 0:07:56.973 --> 0:08:01.493 they call prodromal or like early or false labor. I 0:08:01.533 --> 0:08:03.853 had it with both pregnancy, So essentially I had five 0:08:03.973 --> 0:08:07.693 hours of intense contractions at forty and three and they 0:08:07.693 --> 0:08:09.613 got down to I think about four and a half 0:08:09.693 --> 0:08:12.973 minutes apart and lasting for about forty five seconds. So 0:08:13.013 --> 0:08:15.813 we told my daughter we were having a practice from 0:08:16.213 --> 0:08:18.213 and maybe the baby would be here, and did she 0:08:18.253 --> 0:08:19.573 want to go to Nanna and Pops or did you 0:08:19.613 --> 0:08:21.893 want to stay here in case the baby came? She 0:08:21.933 --> 0:08:23.573 wanted to sleep over it and hand on pops. So 0:08:23.693 --> 0:08:25.453 my parents came and picked her up and took her 0:08:25.493 --> 0:08:27.933 for the ninth. The midwife was like, watch a movie 0:08:27.973 --> 0:08:31.133 something happy, you know, helped the oxytocin flow, So we 0:08:31.173 --> 0:08:32.773 did that and the contraction stopped. 0:08:33.213 --> 0:08:34.613 So I was. 0:08:34.612 --> 0:08:37.173 Like, that's fine, We've been here before. It's not labor, 0:08:37.173 --> 0:08:41.213 but it's helping get me ready. Those contractions continued on 0:08:41.333 --> 0:08:43.853 and off for the next five days and then sort 0:08:43.852 --> 0:08:46.213 of peed it out completely, and it wasn't all the time. 0:08:46.293 --> 0:08:48.293 I'd sort of have patches of like an hour or 0:08:48.333 --> 0:08:50.133 two a day, or a couple of times a day 0:08:50.173 --> 0:08:52.772 where I'd be like, oh, here we go again. We 0:08:52.893 --> 0:08:55.333 hit I think it was forty one weeks and one 0:08:55.413 --> 0:08:59.173 day and one. Thing about privately practicing midwives, or at 0:08:59.213 --> 0:09:02.293 least the one that I had who was phenomenal, they 0:09:02.293 --> 0:09:05.253 are so across the evidence in terms of like post 0:09:05.333 --> 0:09:07.453 dates care. So basically, as soon as you hit that 0:09:07.493 --> 0:09:10.933 magic you know, forty week estimated due date and the 0:09:10.973 --> 0:09:15.012 recommended care for after that. My midwife is very communicative, 0:09:15.093 --> 0:09:18.613 I guess about the risks, and while she reiterated that 0:09:18.653 --> 0:09:21.813 forty one weeks is still perfectly normal. Just station at 0:09:21.813 --> 0:09:24.413 that point. The evidence is to get a scan at 0:09:24.453 --> 0:09:26.813 the very least to check fluid levels so that if 0:09:26.853 --> 0:09:29.093 I'd had a leak or anything, and make sure that 0:09:29.213 --> 0:09:30.852 the baby was still happy and healthy in there. I 0:09:30.893 --> 0:09:34.213 had no concerns. Baby was still moving. I could you 0:09:34.413 --> 0:09:36.732 feel an elbow or a knee or a shoulder or whatever. 0:09:36.773 --> 0:09:39.293 It was popping out at random hours. So we went 0:09:39.333 --> 0:09:41.733 for a scan on the Monday morning forty one and 0:09:41.773 --> 0:09:44.732 one and home. Remember we were sitting there and the 0:09:44.813 --> 0:09:47.613 ultrasound technician was checking the fluid levels and checking the 0:09:47.653 --> 0:09:50.973 placental blood flow and all those essential things, and he 0:09:51.013 --> 0:09:52.852 actually made a comment. He said, how far along are you? 0:09:52.893 --> 0:09:55.493 And I said forty one and one today. He said, right, 0:09:55.893 --> 0:09:59.253 everything looks great. Baby's really comfortable in there. But hopefully 0:09:59.293 --> 0:10:00.613 I don't have to see you next week for a 0:10:00.653 --> 0:10:03.093 forty two week scan. I said, oh God, let's hope not. 0:10:03.733 --> 0:10:07.653 So after that scan we went home and because as 0:10:07.733 --> 0:10:10.293 luck would have it, my midwife had two clients that 0:10:10.333 --> 0:10:12.813 were due in the month of October. I'd been due 0:10:12.933 --> 0:10:14.852 at the very start. My due date was the first 0:10:14.853 --> 0:10:17.693 of October and her other October client was due right 0:10:17.733 --> 0:10:21.093 at the end. However, as luck would have it, client 0:10:21.173 --> 0:10:23.933 needed to give birth at a hospital in Sydney on 0:10:23.973 --> 0:10:26.573 this day that my scan was booked for, and the 0:10:26.613 --> 0:10:28.573 midwife had called me the day before and said, look, 0:10:28.613 --> 0:10:32.133 if you're feeling anything, if there's any sign baby's coming, 0:10:32.173 --> 0:10:34.573 I won't go. I'll explain to the other client that 0:10:34.613 --> 0:10:37.453 I just can't travel to Sydney when you're a week over. 0:10:38.453 --> 0:10:40.653 And I sort of said, I feel okay, We've been 0:10:40.693 --> 0:10:43.653 here a few days and nothing's changed. So I texted 0:10:43.653 --> 0:10:46.733 her after the scan and said, hey, I'll just sound texted. 0:10:46.813 --> 0:10:49.533 Everything looks good, no signs of moving. Hope your other 0:10:49.533 --> 0:10:52.733 client goes well, And she texted back and she was like, thanks, 0:10:52.773 --> 0:10:57.133 talk soon. So my husband decided, because we've been told 0:10:57.333 --> 0:11:01.413 essentially that everything looked like the same, that he would 0:11:01.453 --> 0:11:03.493 go into the office for the day on the twenty 0:11:03.533 --> 0:11:05.373 minutes from home and just sort of wrap a few 0:11:05.373 --> 0:11:07.173 things up and tell everybody at work that he was 0:11:07.213 --> 0:11:08.773 going to work from home for the remainder of the 0:11:08.813 --> 0:11:11.253 week because it had to be coming sooner or later. 0:11:11.733 --> 0:11:13.453 So you'll buy yourself at home. 0:11:13.293 --> 0:11:15.613 By myself at home, which is fine. You know, I 0:11:15.613 --> 0:11:17.253 had a snack, I lead on the couch. I put 0:11:17.253 --> 0:11:20.573 on a movie I sort of got I think I 0:11:20.773 --> 0:11:22.413 was like two thirds of the way through the movie 0:11:22.573 --> 0:11:23.732 and I was like, oh, I have to go to 0:11:23.773 --> 0:11:26.533 the toilet. And so I did that and went back 0:11:26.573 --> 0:11:28.533 and started the movie, and ten minutes later I felt 0:11:28.533 --> 0:11:29.813 like I had to go to the toilet again, and 0:11:29.853 --> 0:11:32.293 I was like, oh, this is weird. And I texted 0:11:32.333 --> 0:11:33.973 my husband. I said I'm going to the toilet a bit, 0:11:34.213 --> 0:11:36.973 like did we eat something weird? And he's like, oh, yeah, 0:11:37.013 --> 0:11:38.413 I've been a few times as well. It must have 0:11:38.453 --> 0:11:40.813 been whatever we had for dinner last time. I'm like, oh, okay, 0:11:40.893 --> 0:11:44.133 no worries. I didn't think any more of it. And 0:11:44.173 --> 0:11:46.213 then after I'd gone to the toilet like twice more 0:11:46.253 --> 0:11:49.333 in like fifteen minutes, the first contraction hit. 0:11:49.933 --> 0:11:53.413 Okay, So were you feeling cramping when you needed to 0:11:53.413 --> 0:11:55.413 go to the toilet or was he like just weeing? 0:11:56.013 --> 0:11:57.333 No, it was like I needed to poop. 0:11:57.653 --> 0:11:58.133 Okay. 0:11:58.293 --> 0:12:00.573 So that's where I was like, did we eat something funny? 0:12:00.813 --> 0:12:02.813 And again, cause my husband was like yeah, maybe, I 0:12:02.853 --> 0:12:05.533 was like okay, cool, Probably not pregnancy because he's feeling 0:12:05.533 --> 0:12:09.133 it too, must have been whatever. So the first contraction 0:12:09.253 --> 0:12:12.653 hit and I started my app with the timing, and 0:12:12.693 --> 0:12:14.613 then the next one hit two and a half minutes later. 0:12:15.053 --> 0:12:18.533 So I called my husband and I said, hey, something's happening. 0:12:19.253 --> 0:12:21.013 Can you pack up and work from home for the 0:12:21.053 --> 0:12:23.933 rest of the afternoon? Interesting case and he was like, yep, sure, 0:12:23.973 --> 0:12:26.053 I'll say goodbye to everyone and pack up and head home. 0:12:26.413 --> 0:12:29.013 I said, cool. I texted my midwife, who I knew 0:12:29.053 --> 0:12:31.573 was in Sydney, so minimum two hours drive from Newcastle. 0:12:31.973 --> 0:12:34.413 I said, hey, things are kicking off. Just had a 0:12:34.413 --> 0:12:37.253 couple of contractions a few minutes apart. Do you want 0:12:37.253 --> 0:12:40.293 to start driving? Basically, because we knew that my first 0:12:40.293 --> 0:12:42.213 birth was two and a half hours, we knew those 0:12:42.213 --> 0:12:45.533 are possibility things. We've moved quickly. And my midwife texted 0:12:45.573 --> 0:12:48.533 back she said, yep, jumping in the car now. I 0:12:48.573 --> 0:12:51.613 texted my dooler and I said, hey, this is happening. 0:12:51.733 --> 0:12:53.732 She's like cool, I'm just going to get my kids 0:12:53.733 --> 0:12:55.773 off to care and then I'll start heading your way. 0:12:56.533 --> 0:12:58.612 And by the time I'd made those calls, I was like, oh, okay, 0:12:58.653 --> 0:13:01.253 these contractions are getting faster. I think maybe ten minutes 0:13:01.293 --> 0:13:04.852 had passed and they were two minutes apart and lasting 0:13:04.893 --> 0:13:08.493 fifty to fifty five seconds, and then they started getting 0:13:08.613 --> 0:13:10.973 really intense, to the point where I was like, oh 0:13:10.973 --> 0:13:14.173 my gosh, I can't even stand through these. And I 0:13:14.213 --> 0:13:16.973 remembered either the doll or the midwife, one of them 0:13:17.013 --> 0:13:20.213 saying that a birth planning appointment, because you've had a 0:13:20.253 --> 0:13:22.573 fast way before. If you feel like things are getting 0:13:22.573 --> 0:13:26.453 out of control, quickly get your tummy horizontal, like so 0:13:26.573 --> 0:13:30.413 that you know your luterus is working against gravity. So 0:13:30.453 --> 0:13:33.573 I was down on my on sweet floor in the bathroom, 0:13:33.613 --> 0:13:35.893 so the tiniest room of my house, on all fours, 0:13:36.533 --> 0:13:39.253 kind of just hoping that gravity had slow the berth down. 0:13:39.893 --> 0:13:42.492 Disappointed to say that did not make a difference at all. 0:13:42.773 --> 0:13:45.333 So I jumped into the shower, still on all faurs, 0:13:45.573 --> 0:13:48.852 hoping that the water would ease some of the pain 0:13:49.053 --> 0:13:51.653 I guess of the contractions. That was also a very 0:13:51.653 --> 0:13:54.533 poor choice, because then it was extremely difficult to get 0:13:54.573 --> 0:13:57.573 out of the shower. I did at one point manage. 0:13:57.573 --> 0:14:00.493 I got out of the shower literally crawled across the 0:14:00.573 --> 0:14:02.813 floor to get my phone so that I could call 0:14:02.853 --> 0:14:05.013 my husband and be like you know, excuse me, where 0:14:05.053 --> 0:14:05.733 the hell are you? 0:14:06.493 --> 0:14:09.293 Yeah, So, just to clarify some of the timings, you 0:14:09.333 --> 0:14:12.653 called your husband, you call your duola, your midwife, and 0:14:12.693 --> 0:14:16.133 then you go into the shower. How much time has 0:14:16.173 --> 0:14:18.133 passed between that first phone call and the time you 0:14:18.213 --> 0:14:19.893 call your husband again to be like where are you? 0:14:20.373 --> 0:14:22.173 So I had to pull this all together from like 0:14:22.453 --> 0:14:25.573 call logs basically. So I called my husband just after midday. 0:14:26.173 --> 0:14:28.853 I was in the shower at quarter past twelve. I 0:14:28.933 --> 0:14:32.573 crawled out of the shower at twelve thirty five and 0:14:32.613 --> 0:14:35.253 my water broke just as I got out of the shower, 0:14:35.493 --> 0:14:38.173 all over the on sweet floor, thankfully not on the carpet. 0:14:38.653 --> 0:14:41.093 And then straight after my water broke at twelve forty 0:14:41.293 --> 0:14:44.773 that was I felt the urge to push. So we're 0:14:44.853 --> 0:14:49.853 forty minutes, forty minutes from first contraction coming up. So 0:14:49.933 --> 0:14:53.453 my midwife, very calmly says to me a loud speaker, Lauren, 0:14:53.933 --> 0:14:56.573 can you ask Matt to come back in please? So 0:14:56.613 --> 0:14:59.053 I've yelled for him to come back in, and the 0:14:59.133 --> 0:15:03.293 midwife says to Matt again, so calm, just Matt, don't 0:15:03.293 --> 0:15:06.413 worry about the birthpool. You need to die. Triple zero. 0:15:09.413 --> 0:15:11.413 I just want to also to say, you are by 0:15:11.453 --> 0:15:13.293 yourself in your house right now? 0:15:13.453 --> 0:15:14.533 I am by myself. 0:15:14.813 --> 0:15:16.093 Yeah, Are you scared? 0:15:17.733 --> 0:15:21.333 I mean yes and no. It was yeah, yes, because 0:15:21.413 --> 0:15:23.973 I was like, this isn't how we planned it the birth, 0:15:24.173 --> 0:15:26.573 and we'd had the birth space set up for weeks 0:15:26.613 --> 0:15:28.453 expecting that i'd go early, so we had, you know, 0:15:28.813 --> 0:15:32.733 a pool inflated and the beautiful fairy lights and like 0:15:32.773 --> 0:15:35.653 photos of my daughter and my husband and I all 0:15:35.693 --> 0:15:38.853 together to help, you know, promote a positive and loving environment. 0:15:39.453 --> 0:15:41.333 And I couldn't even crawl from one end of the 0:15:41.333 --> 0:15:44.573 house to the other where all of that was. So 0:15:44.733 --> 0:15:47.053 I was scared in that it didn't look like it 0:15:47.133 --> 0:15:51.053 was how it was planned. But I was also confident 0:15:51.293 --> 0:15:55.053 because I remember being told or reading that if birth 0:15:55.093 --> 0:15:58.613 happens quickly, it's generally because things are going well. So 0:15:58.893 --> 0:16:02.493 if things are wrong, birth tends to slow down, not 0:16:02.613 --> 0:16:05.613 the opposite. And I was like, okay, so that must 0:16:05.613 --> 0:16:07.213 have popped into my head, which was great. It was 0:16:07.253 --> 0:16:10.293 the reassurance I needed after my water broke that I 0:16:10.333 --> 0:16:15.253 definitely panicked because I remembered the first time, like if 0:16:15.253 --> 0:16:18.293 my water hadn't been broken manually, it probably would have 0:16:18.413 --> 0:16:21.613 broken just before you're ready to push, So what generally 0:16:21.653 --> 0:16:24.653 happens if your water breaks in labor? And because I 0:16:24.693 --> 0:16:27.893 felt that intense pressure to push almost instantly, I was like, 0:16:28.133 --> 0:16:31.013 oh God, where is everybody? And it wasn't a I 0:16:31.053 --> 0:16:34.093 can't birth this child, it was a who's going to 0:16:34.133 --> 0:16:37.453 catch the child? I am on a tiled floor if 0:16:37.653 --> 0:16:39.893 I was like, physically, I can't do it. So I 0:16:39.933 --> 0:16:44.773 called my midwife at that point and said, this has happened, obviously, 0:16:44.813 --> 0:16:47.293 knowing she's coming from Sydney, she's at best still an 0:16:47.293 --> 0:16:50.293 hour and a half away. I have to give her credit. 0:16:50.773 --> 0:16:54.333 She was the calmest person I've ever spoken to ever 0:16:55.373 --> 0:16:58.253 with She's driving down the freeway talking to a woman 0:16:58.293 --> 0:17:01.693 who is, you know, giving birth imminently. She just sounded 0:17:01.693 --> 0:17:04.053 so calm. It was very reassuring. And I remember her 0:17:04.213 --> 0:17:09.372 very calmly saying, Lauren, where is Matt my husband? And 0:17:09.453 --> 0:17:12.213 I said, I don't know. I called him forty minutes ago, 0:17:12.572 --> 0:17:16.133 he's not here, and she said, right, can you hang 0:17:16.213 --> 0:17:19.933 up on me and call him. Luckily, he walked through 0:17:19.973 --> 0:17:22.933 the door really at that moment and calls out, where 0:17:22.973 --> 0:17:24.933 are you? And I'm like, I'm in the en suite 0:17:25.533 --> 0:17:27.453 and he comes running in and sees me on all 0:17:27.453 --> 0:17:31.453 fours obviously my water broken all over the floor. The 0:17:31.453 --> 0:17:34.213 midwife on loudspeaker on my phone. He goes, what do 0:17:34.253 --> 0:17:36.253 you want me to do? And I said, can you 0:17:36.293 --> 0:17:40.213 start filling the birth pool? Like baby's coming? So he 0:17:40.293 --> 0:17:42.173 ran out to the kitchen and was fiddling with the 0:17:42.573 --> 0:17:46.213 hose connections. I've had I don't know, two or three 0:17:46.213 --> 0:17:48.733 contractions in the next couple of minutes, and my midwife, 0:17:48.853 --> 0:17:52.213 very calmly says to me on loud speaker, Lauren, can 0:17:52.293 --> 0:17:54.852 you ask Matt to come back in please? So I've 0:17:54.933 --> 0:17:57.653 yelled for him to come back in, and the midwife 0:17:57.693 --> 0:18:01.733 says to Matt again, so calm, just Matt, don't worry 0:18:01.733 --> 0:18:04.293 about the birthpool. You need to die a triple zero. 0:18:04.493 --> 0:18:05.773 This baby is coming soon. 0:18:06.293 --> 0:18:09.333 I would love to know, because there's quite a primal 0:18:09.373 --> 0:18:11.693 thing that takes over when you're in those last stages 0:18:11.733 --> 0:18:14.733 of birth, particularly when you're in that pushing phase. It's 0:18:14.773 --> 0:18:17.893 quite primal, becomes quite guttural. Yes, the midwife is being 0:18:18.013 --> 0:18:22.013 very calm. Matt, your husband. Men are not usually known 0:18:22.093 --> 0:18:25.853 for being very calm during these really stressful situations. 0:18:25.933 --> 0:18:29.253 What was his response with the midwife. He did what 0:18:29.293 --> 0:18:32.293 she said, he died triple zero, and his phone straight away. 0:18:32.693 --> 0:18:34.812 It was a very interesting situation. And it's funny that 0:18:34.853 --> 0:18:37.373 you talk about the primal brain because the situation that 0:18:37.413 --> 0:18:40.292 I found myself in, I very much felt like I 0:18:40.413 --> 0:18:42.693 was in that, But it was also like a part 0:18:42.693 --> 0:18:46.093 of my brain had split off and was still present 0:18:46.373 --> 0:18:48.933 and almost like watching the primal part happening, because I 0:18:48.973 --> 0:18:51.453 was still aware that my husband was talking to the 0:18:51.453 --> 0:18:54.852 ambulance dispatches. So it's his phone on speaker talking to 0:18:55.373 --> 0:18:57.853 the ambulance team and then my midwife on speaker trying 0:18:57.853 --> 0:19:02.093 to coach me through contractions. And I remember one thing 0:19:02.173 --> 0:19:05.253 vividly of the multiple phone calls and everything with contractions 0:19:05.293 --> 0:19:08.292 going on, is the dispatcher saying does she need a 0:19:08.373 --> 0:19:12.013 transfer to hospital or do you need somebody to deliver 0:19:12.093 --> 0:19:15.572 the baby? And Matt's basically yelling at her, no, the 0:19:15.613 --> 0:19:18.973 baby is coming now, how soon can someone be here? 0:19:19.573 --> 0:19:22.373 And she was like the dispatcher heard me having a contraction. 0:19:22.533 --> 0:19:25.733 She's like, oh, oh, I can set the closest one 0:19:25.813 --> 0:19:27.933 is ten minutes away. Can you unlock the front door 0:19:27.933 --> 0:19:31.413 and stay on the phone until they get there, so yeah, 0:19:32.373 --> 0:19:35.612 I think the time the paramedics arrived was pretty much 0:19:35.653 --> 0:19:39.373 one o'clock, so yeah, twenty ish minutes, fifteen ish minutes 0:19:39.413 --> 0:19:45.453 of midwife, paramedic dispatcher, both on speakerphone. My husband we'd 0:19:45.493 --> 0:19:48.613 spoken about what I wanted his role in birth to be. 0:19:49.453 --> 0:19:51.853 He was very adamant. He was like, I don't want 0:19:51.893 --> 0:19:53.373 to catch the baby. I think it's going to be 0:19:53.413 --> 0:19:56.813 really slippery. I am worried about it, and I was like, look, 0:19:57.333 --> 0:20:00.572 totally understand. That's fine. If we had a been in 0:20:00.573 --> 0:20:03.133 the water, I would have loved to catch the baby myself, 0:20:03.173 --> 0:20:06.293 but that was not where we found ourselves. And when 0:20:06.293 --> 0:20:09.092 the paramedics arrived at one o'clock, Matt obviously brought them 0:20:09.133 --> 0:20:12.733 straight in. We were very fortunate. We didn't realize how 0:20:12.813 --> 0:20:15.813 fortunate at the time, but when there's an imminent birth, 0:20:16.173 --> 0:20:18.333 they send two ambulances, so they send one in case 0:20:18.413 --> 0:20:20.413 mom needs care and one in case Bob needs care. 0:20:21.133 --> 0:20:23.453 And as luck would have it, the first ambulance on 0:20:23.493 --> 0:20:26.693 the scene was two female paramedics, one of whom was 0:20:26.733 --> 0:20:30.253