WEBVTT - Jules Neale & The Post-Breakup Vibe Shift

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<v Speaker 1>You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Hello and welcome to Mama Mia out Loud. It's what

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<v Speaker 2>women are actually talking about on Wednesday, the twenty eighth

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<v Speaker 2>of January.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm Holly Wainwright, I'm Amelia Luster.

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<v Speaker 4>And I'm Jesse Stevens.

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<v Speaker 2>And here's what's on our agenda for today. The latest

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<v Speaker 2>chapter in a very public Australian cheating scandal and what

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<v Speaker 2>it tells us about a woman scorned in twenty twenty six.

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<v Speaker 1>And we've been reading a lot of celebrity text messages

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<v Speaker 1>these last couple of days, and it turns out they

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<v Speaker 1>really are just like us and Minneapolis.

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<v Speaker 4>What is going on? What does the video footage tell us?

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<v Speaker 4>And where to from here?

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<v Speaker 3>But first, Jesse Stevens, In.

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<v Speaker 4>Case you missed it, Coco Goff, the twenty one year

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<v Speaker 4>old US tennis player who last night lost to Ukrainian

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<v Speaker 4>Elena Spittelina at the Australian Open, wishes we hadn't seen

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<v Speaker 4>that video. So she lost in under an hour. It

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<v Speaker 4>was very decisive and in the aftermath she was caught

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<v Speaker 4>on video. You would have seen it if you've clicked

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<v Speaker 4>on any articles today or you've had the TV on

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<v Speaker 4>of her just smashing that tennis racket on like a

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<v Speaker 4>concrete ramp.

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<v Speaker 2>She's gone a little bit behind a wall. Yep, so

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<v Speaker 2>she's like hiding herself from view. Yes, but there's a

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<v Speaker 2>camera up behind her the right everything exactly.

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<v Speaker 4>And so that has been broadcast all around the world.

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<v Speaker 4>And look, a tennis player losing and then smashing a

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<v Speaker 4>racket not unusual. What is unusual is how unimpressed golf was.

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<v Speaker 4>And she expressed this that that moment was broadcast. So

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<v Speaker 4>in a post match press conference, she said, certain moments

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<v Speaker 4>I feel like they don't need to be broadcast. I

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<v Speaker 4>tried to go somewhere where I thought there wasn't a

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<v Speaker 4>camera because I don't necessarily like breaking rackets. I broke

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<v Speaker 4>one racket at the French Open. This was a few

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<v Speaker 4>years ago. I said I'd never do it again on

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<v Speaker 4>court because I don't feel like that's a good representation.

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<v Speaker 4>So yeah, maybe some conversations can be had. And she

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<v Speaker 4>said that she wanted to take herself away so that

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<v Speaker 4>she didn't take it out on her team, and she

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<v Speaker 4>doesn't like to set a bad example for kids who

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<v Speaker 4>are watching, who watch someone just lose their temper.

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<v Speaker 3>Tic tick Coco Goff is.

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<v Speaker 4>My pictick at the time where recording there's talk of

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<v Speaker 4>a potential fine fifty thousand dollars.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think smashing the racket. Yes, behind the scenes, yes.

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<v Speaker 4>So if you are playing a Grand Slam. The rules

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<v Speaker 4>state that players shall not violently, dangerously or with anger, hit, kick,

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<v Speaker 4>or throw a racket or other equipment within the precincts

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<v Speaker 4>of the tournament site.

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<v Speaker 3>Does that why Nick Kurrios stop playing?

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<v Speaker 4>He's gone quiet, hasn't he?

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<v Speaker 3>That's a little bit.

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<v Speaker 4>Now what do we think? I'm not sure what I

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<v Speaker 4>make of this, because, I mean, do we expect them

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<v Speaker 4>not to broadcast it? The cameras are there. This is

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<v Speaker 4>part of the theater of tennis. It's not like a

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<v Speaker 4>camera chaster in. It's not like a guy with a

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<v Speaker 4>camera chaster in and invaded her privacy in that way.

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<v Speaker 4>I think it's fair game. What do you reckon, Amelia?

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<v Speaker 1>I do think we're just seeing too much these days,

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<v Speaker 1>just in everything, including the tennis. On the weekend, I

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<v Speaker 1>was subjected to Novak Djokovic's foot like a closer of

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<v Speaker 1>his foot as it was getting a band aid put

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<v Speaker 1>on it, and I just thought, why do.

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<v Speaker 4>I need to see now, I don't want to google that.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, you can google feet in your own time, but

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<v Speaker 1>I don't have to watch them.

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<v Speaker 5>As the point, I don't know.

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<v Speaker 4>It's like, isn't this why they are paid so much

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<v Speaker 4>money because we are going to broadcast them tantrums, feet, injuries,

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<v Speaker 4>all of it.

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<v Speaker 3>I have a lot of sympathy for her.

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<v Speaker 2>She said that she's felt like at this tournament, and

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<v Speaker 2>she made appointed this tournament dig she feels like the

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<v Speaker 2>only place where you're not on cameras in the change rooms.

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<v Speaker 2>And the reason I have a lot of sympathy for

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<v Speaker 2>I think is that she's trying to play against a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of stereotypes about because she's really young, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>it's really young player, about angry women, about all those things.

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<v Speaker 2>She's trying to play against those stereotypes by keeping her

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<v Speaker 2>tanty and frustration private and then everyone saw it.

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<v Speaker 3>Anyway, I would be really pissed off too.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, but you could go to the bathroom. You could

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<v Speaker 4>go to the bathroom, Like I'm thinking, she.

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<v Speaker 3>Couldn't make it to the bathroom.

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<v Speaker 4>She was too angry. She was like in NRL, you've

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<v Speaker 4>got cameras in the locker room. F one you've got

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<v Speaker 4>broadcasting what they're saying to each other. I think that

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<v Speaker 4>access is increasing to all sports people like we are

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<v Speaker 4>seeing them. Certainly the access is and sorry, but we

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<v Speaker 4>want it, Like look at how viral this footage went.

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<v Speaker 2>The thing about this is that she will be labeled

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<v Speaker 2>in some quarters as a tennis brat, right, which is

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<v Speaker 2>a cliche that is handed around a lot, not only

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<v Speaker 2>to women, I mean, obviously lots to men that she

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<v Speaker 2>clearly is actively trying to play against by not taking

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<v Speaker 2>out on her team, not yelling at people on court,

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<v Speaker 2>not doing any of those things.

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<v Speaker 3>And is that fair?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going to argue against myself here having said that

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<v Speaker 1>we see too much. On the other hand, part of

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<v Speaker 1>the reason why we watch sport is not just for

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<v Speaker 1>the athletic achievement. It is because it is interesting to

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<v Speaker 1>us as humans to watch other humans deal with enormous

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<v Speaker 1>psychological pressure and to see how they deal with it,

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<v Speaker 1>and sports people try and keep it under wraps in

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<v Speaker 1>a way that us ordinary people could never do. We

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<v Speaker 1>were talking before about how Jesse, you and I if

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<v Speaker 1>we were professional tennis players.

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<v Speaker 5>We would absolutely be labeled as hottheads.

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<v Speaker 1>I would absolutely be arguing with the umpire routinely, so

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<v Speaker 1>I have nothing but sympathy for them. But that's part

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<v Speaker 1>of why we like watching sport. We like watching people

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<v Speaker 1>under pressure.

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<v Speaker 4>I found this incredibly relatable. I didn't judge her for it.

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, oh, will.

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<v Speaker 4>And you know, I understand she's trying to play against that.

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<v Speaker 4>She's a woman. We're a lot harsher on women, not

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<v Speaker 4>to mention black women. We saw it with the Williams sisters,

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<v Speaker 4>like the idea that you've got a.

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<v Speaker 5>Temper that you can't control to a higher stand.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah. I think tennis in particular, like any sport that's solo,

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<v Speaker 4>you see these outbursts and they have been part and

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<v Speaker 4>parcel of what tennis is since the game began.

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<v Speaker 5>So sny Caveman with fashioning rackets out of tweet.

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<v Speaker 4>It's whether or not in grass or clay. I mean,

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<v Speaker 4>I kind of love moments like this. So maybe I'm

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<v Speaker 4>just a bit of a perf and I just want

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<v Speaker 4>to see people as this shit.

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<v Speaker 3>Look.

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<v Speaker 2>I think Amelia started twenty twenty six thinking maybe there'll

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<v Speaker 2>be a show sometime where I don't have to do

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<v Speaker 2>an explainer about some helli ish shit that has been

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<v Speaker 2>unleashed in America.

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<v Speaker 3>This week is not that week. Sorry, Amelia.

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<v Speaker 2>We need you to help us understand what is going

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<v Speaker 2>on in America right now. If you've been seeing headlines

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<v Speaker 2>and frankly, very distressing videos all over your feeds about

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<v Speaker 2>what's going on in Minneapolis at the moment, She's gonna

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<v Speaker 2>tell us, and we're also going to get a little

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<v Speaker 2>glimpse into a movie you might be seeing Ads Force,

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<v Speaker 2>starring the First Lady. But first, Amelia, can we start

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<v Speaker 2>with the videos. There has been incredibly distressing footage coming

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<v Speaker 2>out of Minneapolis, not just this week but for a month.

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<v Speaker 2>But everything seemed to really come to another head on

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<v Speaker 2>Sunday with the shooting of a young man.

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<v Speaker 3>Can you tell us a bit about that.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so you're referring to the fact that there've been

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<v Speaker 1>two civilians killed this month in Minneapolis, which is a

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<v Speaker 1>city in the state of Minnesota, and both of these

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<v Speaker 1>killings were captured on mobile phones by many people who

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<v Speaker 1>were there. The first killing was of a woman named

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<v Speaker 1>Renee Good. She was a poet, she was a mother

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<v Speaker 1>of three, and she was in her car talking with

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<v Speaker 1>an Immigration and Customs enforcement agent. And we'll get to

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<v Speaker 1>who those people are in a minute, but she actually says.

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<v Speaker 1>Her last words in the video are she says to

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<v Speaker 1>this Ice agent, I'm not mad at you, and she

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<v Speaker 1>is seen visibly turning her car around to get away

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<v Speaker 1>from him, to get away from this tense confrontation with someone,

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<v Speaker 1>and then she is shot four times, including in the head,

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<v Speaker 1>and a man's voice is heard afterwards calling her a

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<v Speaker 1>fucking bitch'nbelievably distressing, it's very upsetting. And then the second

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<v Speaker 1>video footage that people may have seen involves the killing

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<v Speaker 1>of Alex Pretty, who was.

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<v Speaker 5>Also in his thirties.

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<v Speaker 1>He was an icy U nurse at a veterans hospital

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<v Speaker 1>and the video that we've seen there is it's become

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<v Speaker 1>pretty clear that he was actually attempting to stand in

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<v Speaker 1>front of a woman who was being gassed by ice agents.

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<v Speaker 1>He wanted to stop her from getting the gas in her.

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<v Speaker 5>Eyes, yep.

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<v Speaker 1>And then he is tackled to the ground by ice

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<v Speaker 1>agents and then they shot him multiple times after they

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<v Speaker 1>tackled him. And both of these videos are pretty bad,

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<v Speaker 1>they're pretty difficult to watch, they're very upsetting, but it's

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<v Speaker 1>interesting that renee Good was killed in the first week

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<v Speaker 1>of January Alex Preddy was killed this past weekend, and

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<v Speaker 1>it does seem that the pretty case is the one

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<v Speaker 1>that is really turning the tide of public opinion against

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<v Speaker 1>what the Trump administration is doing in Minneapolis.

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<v Speaker 3>And what is that?

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<v Speaker 2>So if we don't understand what these ICE raids are

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<v Speaker 2>that are bringing sort of protesters and these agents into

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<v Speaker 2>such close context, well, what is meant to be happening there?

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<v Speaker 2>What is Trump trying to achieve by sending in these guys.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so Immigrations and Customs enforcement agents, they're called ICE agents.

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<v Speaker 1>They were sent to Minneapolis in what was called the

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<v Speaker 1>biggest immigration enforcement action ever. There were two thousand of

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<v Speaker 1>them who were sent there over the course of January. Now,

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<v Speaker 1>to put that in context for Australian listeners, Minneapolis is

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<v Speaker 1>about the size of Canberra population wise, but it's actually

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<v Speaker 1>much genser. So it's like as if Canberra was sort

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<v Speaker 1>of packed together population wise about half a million people.

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<v Speaker 1>So you can imagine that if two armed people came

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<v Speaker 1>to Canberra and were dragging people out of their homes,

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<v Speaker 1>arresting people, detaining people because they say that they are

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<v Speaker 1>in the country illegally. Although there's plenty of evidence that

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<v Speaker 1>they were also detaining people who were in the country legally.

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<v Speaker 1>That would be very upsetting for the residents of Canberra,

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<v Speaker 1>and they might try and do things to help protect

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<v Speaker 1>their neighbors, as people in Minneapolis are doing so. They

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<v Speaker 1>are blowing whistles to let neighbors know that ICE agents

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<v Speaker 1>are coming into their street. They are following ICE agents.

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<v Speaker 1>The governor of Minnesota, Tim Waaltz, who was Kamala Harris's

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<v Speaker 1>vice presidential candidate, he has actually asked residents in Minneapolis

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<v Speaker 1>to get out their phones and to record what the

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<v Speaker 1>ICE agents are doing. That's part of why we have

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<v Speaker 1>just so much footage of these shocking killings.

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<v Speaker 4>So can you tell me who the ICE agents are?

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<v Speaker 4>Are they like police? Are they separate to police? Who

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<v Speaker 4>are they working for? Because they just seem like this

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<v Speaker 4>other species of law enforcement if you would even call

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<v Speaker 4>it that.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, they are another species of law enforcement. Look, if

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<v Speaker 1>you're curious as to who they want to join ICE

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<v Speaker 1>the Trump administration, I would suggest you go to the

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<v Speaker 1>website ICE dot gov slash join. I looked at this

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<v Speaker 1>website last week and it was kind of shocking. It

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't look like a boring website with government jobs. You

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<v Speaker 1>know what government websites look like. They're usually pretty boring.

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<v Speaker 1>There's some sort of like stock art of people standing

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<v Speaker 1>around a conference table smiling at each other. No, that's

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<v Speaker 1>not what they have on this website. It's very stark,

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<v Speaker 1>and there's just this really big text and it reads

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<v Speaker 1>America has been invaded by criminals and predators. We need

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<v Speaker 1>you to get them out. You do not need an

0:11:45.434 --> 0:11:48.833
<v Speaker 1>undergraduate degree. Good news, Holley. So yeah, if you join,

0:11:49.314 --> 0:11:52.234
<v Speaker 1>And it's pretty clear from this that they just want

0:11:52.434 --> 0:11:57.034
<v Speaker 1>anyone who feels angry at immigrants to come and join them.

0:11:57.634 --> 0:12:00.514
<v Speaker 1>The training process has been really shortened ever since the

0:12:00.554 --> 0:12:04.154
<v Speaker 1>Trump administration decided that immigration enforcement was their nother one priority.

0:12:04.394 --> 0:12:08.394
<v Speaker 1>So they have allocated more money to US than any

0:12:08.634 --> 0:12:13.314
<v Speaker 1>military anywhere in the world except the US military. That's

0:12:13.314 --> 0:12:14.314
<v Speaker 1>how much money they have.

0:12:14.434 --> 0:12:16.754
<v Speaker 2>And they're moving quickly, right, So they're recruiting these people

0:12:16.834 --> 0:12:18.634
<v Speaker 2>and sending them out because they've sent them into other

0:12:18.714 --> 0:12:20.914
<v Speaker 2>cities too, haven't they. So they're sort of moving them

0:12:20.954 --> 0:12:22.554
<v Speaker 2>around the country almost.

0:12:22.274 --> 0:12:25.154
<v Speaker 1>Yes, And there is some anecdotal evidence. We know they've

0:12:25.194 --> 0:12:27.914
<v Speaker 1>really shortened training period for them. So ICE agents used

0:12:27.914 --> 0:12:29.874
<v Speaker 1>to be trained for sixteen weeks, which I think is

0:12:29.914 --> 0:12:31.714
<v Speaker 1>a reasonable amount of time for people who are allowed

0:12:31.714 --> 0:12:33.914
<v Speaker 1>to walk around with guns, like dragging people out of

0:12:33.914 --> 0:12:38.074
<v Speaker 1>their homes. But that's been shortened to forty seven days,

0:12:38.114 --> 0:12:41.594
<v Speaker 1>which happens to be the number President Trump is. He's

0:12:41.634 --> 0:12:42.754
<v Speaker 1>the forty seventh president.

0:12:42.994 --> 0:12:43.594
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god.

0:12:43.754 --> 0:12:47.354
<v Speaker 1>And that doesn't seem like long enough to train people

0:12:47.394 --> 0:12:49.834
<v Speaker 1>to use guns and to detain people.

0:12:50.074 --> 0:12:53.034
<v Speaker 4>And how is it that these videos come up? I

0:12:53.114 --> 0:12:57.114
<v Speaker 4>have chosen not to watch these videos, but what I

0:12:57.154 --> 0:13:00.514
<v Speaker 4>have seen is then like press conferences of people in

0:13:00.554 --> 0:13:06.714
<v Speaker 4>their government denying what's in the videos and saying like, oh,

0:13:06.954 --> 0:13:10.514
<v Speaker 4>he was a threat, he was armed, she did this,

0:13:10.674 --> 0:13:14.114
<v Speaker 4>she did that. There seems to be these two counter

0:13:14.354 --> 0:13:17.994
<v Speaker 4>narratives operating, and neither side can even speak to each

0:13:18.034 --> 0:13:19.514
<v Speaker 4>other on the basis of fact.

0:13:19.994 --> 0:13:22.634
<v Speaker 5>So let's get this out of the way. Alex pretty was,

0:13:22.674 --> 0:13:23.434
<v Speaker 5>in fact armed.

0:13:23.674 --> 0:13:27.434
<v Speaker 1>He was carrying a gun as the second amen, Yes,

0:13:27.554 --> 0:13:30.314
<v Speaker 1>he was legally allowed to carry this gun, and it

0:13:30.434 --> 0:13:33.154
<v Speaker 1>was I guess in his pocket or not visible. And

0:13:33.194 --> 0:13:36.154
<v Speaker 1>he was holding up his phone in one hand and

0:13:36.194 --> 0:13:39.514
<v Speaker 1>an open palm in his other. So what the Trump

0:13:39.554 --> 0:13:43.194
<v Speaker 1>administration has tried to say is that he was coming

0:13:43.274 --> 0:13:48.514
<v Speaker 1>to this protest to massacre law enforcement. But it turns

0:13:48.514 --> 0:13:51.714
<v Speaker 1>out from the video that law enforcement didn't know that

0:13:51.794 --> 0:13:55.394
<v Speaker 1>he had a gun until they tackled him. So the

0:13:55.474 --> 0:13:58.354
<v Speaker 1>notion that they decided to go after this guy because

0:13:58.394 --> 0:14:01.634
<v Speaker 1>he was brandishing a gun is not true. The interesting

0:14:01.714 --> 0:14:05.754
<v Speaker 1>thing about this is that Minneapolis may ring a bell

0:14:06.034 --> 0:14:10.074
<v Speaker 1>for some listeners as the place where George Floyd was

0:14:10.234 --> 0:14:14.314
<v Speaker 1>murdered in twenty twenty and which led to the on

0:14:14.754 --> 0:14:17.514
<v Speaker 1>mass black Lives Matter protests that happened in the American

0:14:17.554 --> 0:14:21.994
<v Speaker 1>summer of twenty twenty. That murder was committed by Minneapolis

0:14:22.074 --> 0:14:25.834
<v Speaker 1>police officers. But what's happening now is that the Minneapolis

0:14:25.874 --> 0:14:28.274
<v Speaker 1>police is saying, we have tried really hard since twenty

0:14:28.354 --> 0:14:31.394
<v Speaker 1>twenty to build relationships and trust back in the community,

0:14:31.434 --> 0:14:33.594
<v Speaker 1>and now these ice agents who are separate from the

0:14:33.634 --> 0:14:37.634
<v Speaker 1>police are coming in, They are brandishing guns, they are

0:14:37.634 --> 0:14:40.834
<v Speaker 1>detaining people who are in the country legally, and they're

0:14:40.834 --> 0:14:43.394
<v Speaker 1>eroding a lot of that trust that the police built

0:14:43.474 --> 0:14:45.154
<v Speaker 1>up with the local community.

0:14:46.194 --> 0:14:48.674
<v Speaker 5>So that brings us to what's happening.

0:14:48.434 --> 0:14:50.114
<v Speaker 1>Now, which is that in the last twenty four hours,

0:14:50.154 --> 0:14:53.834
<v Speaker 1>Trump has basically said, Okay, this went too far, which

0:14:54.034 --> 0:14:55.474
<v Speaker 1>is fascinating.

0:14:54.994 --> 0:14:58.394
<v Speaker 2>I've heard a lot of commentary which suggests that the

0:14:58.514 --> 0:15:01.474
<v Speaker 2>videos and the fact that, for example, the shooting of

0:15:01.514 --> 0:15:03.994
<v Speaker 2>Alex Prette, you can watch from every angle, right, So

0:15:04.274 --> 0:15:06.834
<v Speaker 2>you were saying before that Tim Waltz said, go forth

0:15:06.874 --> 0:15:10.354
<v Speaker 2>and film, and there's something a little bit there's very confronting,

0:15:10.394 --> 0:15:12.914
<v Speaker 2>but it means that the spinning doesn't work. And I've

0:15:12.914 --> 0:15:14.754
<v Speaker 2>seen a lot of commentary that's sort of saying that

0:15:14.954 --> 0:15:16.954
<v Speaker 2>Trump is now looking at those videos and going, I

0:15:16.994 --> 0:15:19.354
<v Speaker 2>can't satify as raw.

0:15:19.514 --> 0:15:22.234
<v Speaker 1>And a key component is guess who's mad at him?

0:15:22.394 --> 0:15:26.354
<v Speaker 1>The National Rifle Association the NRA. These are the people

0:15:26.394 --> 0:15:29.554
<v Speaker 1>who for years have been pushing this idea that it

0:15:29.674 --> 0:15:32.754
<v Speaker 1>is Americans god given right to carry guns, as outlined

0:15:32.754 --> 0:15:35.874
<v Speaker 1>in the Second Amendment. You mentioned Jesse that school shootings

0:15:35.914 --> 0:15:38.274
<v Speaker 1>happen because there aren't enough good guys with guns, And

0:15:38.354 --> 0:15:41.194
<v Speaker 1>all of a sudden, Trump, a Republican president who is

0:15:41.234 --> 0:15:44.194
<v Speaker 1>meant to be supported by the NRA, is saying that

0:15:44.234 --> 0:15:47.154
<v Speaker 1>Alex pretty maybe deserve to be killed because he took

0:15:47.154 --> 0:15:50.234
<v Speaker 1>a gun to a protest. This has angered them. So

0:15:50.434 --> 0:15:53.354
<v Speaker 1>you're seeing all these interesting fractures in what used to

0:15:53.394 --> 0:15:56.034
<v Speaker 1>be a coalition of say the police the NRA, the

0:15:56.074 --> 0:15:59.354
<v Speaker 1>Republican president, and now that is all being torn apart,

0:15:59.394 --> 0:16:02.234
<v Speaker 1>and Trump does not like that. He doesn't like feeling

0:16:02.274 --> 0:16:06.074
<v Speaker 1>like his support base is dwindling, and Americans are saying

0:16:06.074 --> 0:16:08.714
<v Speaker 1>in polls, we don't want we don't want people meted

0:16:08.714 --> 0:16:11.034
<v Speaker 1>in the streets like It's fair to point out that

0:16:11.074 --> 0:16:14.514
<v Speaker 1>a majority of Americans do want an immigration crackdown, that's

0:16:14.594 --> 0:16:17.314
<v Speaker 1>what they voted for, and they also support ICE agents

0:16:17.314 --> 0:16:19.994
<v Speaker 1>going into cities and doing this, but what they don't

0:16:20.034 --> 0:16:21.954
<v Speaker 1>support is killing people.

0:16:22.314 --> 0:16:23.594
<v Speaker 3>All of this sounds horrific.

0:16:23.714 --> 0:16:26.274
<v Speaker 2>What I am seeing, though, is a lot of reporting

0:16:26.314 --> 0:16:28.794
<v Speaker 2>from all kinds of publications in different places saying this

0:16:28.874 --> 0:16:31.034
<v Speaker 2>is a turning point, This is a breaking point, this

0:16:31.114 --> 0:16:33.314
<v Speaker 2>is going to be everything's going to change from here,

0:16:33.714 --> 0:16:34.514
<v Speaker 2>maybe for the good.

0:16:34.594 --> 0:16:35.794
<v Speaker 3>Maybe Trump's going to back down.

0:16:35.834 --> 0:16:36.594
<v Speaker 5>Maybe.

0:16:37.434 --> 0:16:41.154
<v Speaker 2>Why do you think that this particular incident or series

0:16:41.194 --> 0:16:45.714
<v Speaker 2>of incidents has become quite so? I don't know if

0:16:45.754 --> 0:16:48.754
<v Speaker 2>important is the right word, but seeing significant.

0:16:49.914 --> 0:16:52.154
<v Speaker 1>Well, another incident that we haven't talked about, which I

0:16:52.154 --> 0:16:54.434
<v Speaker 1>think has contributed to the sense that it's a turning point.

0:16:54.674 --> 0:16:56.634
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if you saw that a five year

0:16:56.634 --> 0:17:00.674
<v Speaker 1>old boy whose father was detained by Ice agents was

0:17:00.714 --> 0:17:04.834
<v Speaker 1>also detained and CenTra, an immigration facility in Texas. There's

0:17:04.874 --> 0:17:08.634
<v Speaker 1>photos of him wearing his Spider Man backpack. He's come

0:17:08.714 --> 0:17:11.994
<v Speaker 1>home from school, his father is being led away by

0:17:12.034 --> 0:17:15.234
<v Speaker 1>these Ice agents, and by all accounts, his mother, who

0:17:15.314 --> 0:17:17.714
<v Speaker 1>was in the house where his father was detained, is saying.

0:17:17.514 --> 0:17:18.674
<v Speaker 5>Please let him stay with me.

0:17:19.194 --> 0:17:21.553
<v Speaker 1>But the five year old was instead taken away to

0:17:21.674 --> 0:17:25.634
<v Speaker 1>Texas with his father for who knows how long. So

0:17:25.754 --> 0:17:28.634
<v Speaker 1>I think the visuals of this are really upsetting. To

0:17:28.634 --> 0:17:31.674
<v Speaker 1>see this five year old boy in his Spider Man backpack,

0:17:32.034 --> 0:17:35.794
<v Speaker 1>with this huge looming Ice agent with a covered face

0:17:35.834 --> 0:17:38.154
<v Speaker 1>and a mask standing over him, and then pushing him

0:17:38.154 --> 0:17:42.354
<v Speaker 1>into a car. I don't think most Americans like that.

0:17:42.754 --> 0:17:46.074
<v Speaker 1>I want to be clear. They wanted a crackdown on immigration.

0:17:46.194 --> 0:17:49.514
<v Speaker 1>There is a perception that immigrants are bringing crime and disorder,

0:17:49.594 --> 0:17:51.114
<v Speaker 1>particularly to American cities.

0:17:51.634 --> 0:17:53.234
<v Speaker 5>But I don't think people like to.

0:17:53.194 --> 0:17:56.194
<v Speaker 1>See a five year old separated from his mother and

0:17:56.314 --> 0:17:58.554
<v Speaker 1>pushed into the back of a car for doing nothing wrong.

0:17:58.594 --> 0:18:01.394
<v Speaker 1>And I don't think people like Alex Pretty, who was

0:18:01.434 --> 0:18:04.154
<v Speaker 1>by all accounts a great guy an icy U nurse,

0:18:04.754 --> 0:18:06.674
<v Speaker 1>I don't think they like to see him killed in

0:18:06.714 --> 0:18:10.914
<v Speaker 1>the street either, and this gun component has really scrambled

0:18:10.914 --> 0:18:15.833
<v Speaker 1>things culturally because for the right, they're very uncomfortable about

0:18:15.874 --> 0:18:18.034
<v Speaker 1>Trump saying well, he shouldn't have had a gun. That's

0:18:18.074 --> 0:18:21.434
<v Speaker 1>a really uncomfortable clash of cultures.

0:18:21.794 --> 0:18:26.754
<v Speaker 2>Okay, onto something that is adjacent but seems ridiculous in comparison.

0:18:27.194 --> 0:18:29.593
<v Speaker 2>The First Lady has a movie out this week. I

0:18:29.634 --> 0:18:31.634
<v Speaker 2>hope you've all seen the trailer. This morning, I was

0:18:31.634 --> 0:18:33.474
<v Speaker 2>getting ready and I had Breakfast TV on in the

0:18:33.514 --> 0:18:36.834
<v Speaker 2>background and in the ad breaks, I saw several full

0:18:36.914 --> 0:18:40.714
<v Speaker 2>length Milania trailers out in cinemas January the thirtieth.

0:18:40.714 --> 0:18:41.634
<v Speaker 4>I've totally miss it.

0:18:41.834 --> 0:18:43.833
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, all right, so I want to hear a bit

0:18:43.874 --> 0:18:44.634
<v Speaker 3>about this movie.

0:18:44.954 --> 0:18:47.354
<v Speaker 4>Sorry, Is it out in cinemas in Austria?

0:18:47.714 --> 0:18:49.234
<v Speaker 3>Is in Australia you can go and see.

0:18:49.394 --> 0:18:50.634
<v Speaker 4>I can go to Hoyt. Yeah.

0:18:50.634 --> 0:18:52.874
<v Speaker 2>This is in a break on Sunrise this morning, like

0:18:53.234 --> 0:18:56.634
<v Speaker 2>out in cinemas in Australia January thirty, they had a

0:18:56.634 --> 0:18:59.274
<v Speaker 2>screening of this movie. It's going to have its official premiere.

0:18:59.314 --> 0:19:01.513
<v Speaker 2>I saw in New York a glittering premiere.

0:19:01.554 --> 0:19:03.234
<v Speaker 5>That's why I'm going to America in a weekend.

0:19:03.314 --> 0:19:07.514
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think. Also January the twenty ninth New York.

0:19:08.034 --> 0:19:10.954
<v Speaker 2>But they had a screening at the White House on

0:19:11.074 --> 0:19:14.273
<v Speaker 2>the night of the Alex Preddie killing in Minneapolis, so

0:19:14.474 --> 0:19:17.314
<v Speaker 2>things are very heightened there. They still had this screening.

0:19:17.354 --> 0:19:19.434
<v Speaker 2>Lots of very important people turned up to bend the

0:19:19.514 --> 0:19:23.154
<v Speaker 2>knee and watch the movie. Amelia, what the frick is

0:19:23.194 --> 0:19:25.834
<v Speaker 2>going on with the Millennia Trump documentary?

0:19:26.074 --> 0:19:28.154
<v Speaker 1>You know, if anyone listening to this things, what does

0:19:28.234 --> 0:19:30.553
<v Speaker 1>she know about this? I'll tell you I am the

0:19:30.594 --> 0:19:34.074
<v Speaker 1>world's foremost expert on Millannia Trump because I read her

0:19:34.114 --> 0:19:36.234
<v Speaker 1>memoir and I don't think anyone else.

0:19:36.274 --> 0:19:38.194
<v Speaker 4>You're the only person I know who read the whole memoir.

0:19:38.834 --> 0:19:40.594
<v Speaker 4>Everything there is, Tom.

0:19:40.514 --> 0:19:44.073
<v Speaker 3>If you also watched the whole documentary.

0:19:43.554 --> 0:19:45.154
<v Speaker 4>Every time she comes up, we're going to be like,

0:19:45.194 --> 0:19:46.754
<v Speaker 4>we're calling in an expert.

0:19:46.354 --> 0:19:49.554
<v Speaker 5>And I might have to go. Actually, shall we listen

0:19:49.594 --> 0:19:50.273
<v Speaker 5>to a little bit of it?

0:19:50.474 --> 0:19:54.434
<v Speaker 3>Yes? You can.

0:19:54.514 --> 0:20:03.034
<v Speaker 2>Want will be there, trumph together, we'd like minded leaders.

0:20:03.274 --> 0:20:05.274
<v Speaker 6>We have a voice.

0:20:07.474 --> 0:20:09.594
<v Speaker 5>Is it safe?

0:20:08.314 --> 0:20:08.554
<v Speaker 2>Sure?

0:20:11.274 --> 0:20:12.474
<v Speaker 1>Everyone wants to know.

0:20:14.034 --> 0:20:21.314
<v Speaker 3>So here it is, Hi, mister President.

0:20:21.554 --> 0:20:25.394
<v Speaker 2>Congratulations, I did not Yeah, I will see it on

0:20:25.474 --> 0:20:26.754
<v Speaker 2>the news.

0:20:32.194 --> 0:20:34.914
<v Speaker 3>I really want to go see this documentary. What about

0:20:34.914 --> 0:20:36.514
<v Speaker 3>a team outing? Shall we all go.

0:20:36.954 --> 0:20:39.354
<v Speaker 5>I think we need to go. Why is the soundtrack

0:20:39.474 --> 0:20:41.074
<v Speaker 5>like Teams Succession?

0:20:41.234 --> 0:20:44.234
<v Speaker 4>I know it is. I think it's North Korea. I

0:20:44.274 --> 0:20:48.194
<v Speaker 4>think that it's some sort of It's like a fascist

0:20:48.354 --> 0:20:52.114
<v Speaker 4>propaganda film where I can see like the posters coming

0:20:52.154 --> 0:20:53.554
<v Speaker 4>down and everyone has to do.

0:20:54.954 --> 0:20:58.674
<v Speaker 2>It's made by Milania, really right bye? Well by Ratner,

0:20:58.674 --> 0:21:01.434
<v Speaker 2>who's a very terrible person by all accounts.

0:21:01.474 --> 0:21:03.154
<v Speaker 3>But this is Millania endorsed.

0:21:03.194 --> 0:21:05.754
<v Speaker 1>Correct, Oh very much mine here endorsed. Amazon paid forty

0:21:05.794 --> 0:21:07.794
<v Speaker 1>million dollars for it, which will a lot of filmmakers

0:21:07.834 --> 0:21:10.754
<v Speaker 1>thought was a lot of money for this documentary. I

0:21:10.754 --> 0:21:13.594
<v Speaker 1>love this quote from a Vogue correspondent who wrote, somehow

0:21:13.634 --> 0:21:15.874
<v Speaker 1>I know less about this woman's life than I did

0:21:15.914 --> 0:21:17.474
<v Speaker 1>before I watched this trailer.

0:21:17.914 --> 0:21:19.514
<v Speaker 4>Is that how you felt after reading the book?

0:21:20.394 --> 0:21:22.394
<v Speaker 1>No, and you way too much about her after reading

0:21:22.394 --> 0:21:24.754
<v Speaker 1>the book. I love this bit. I was looking at

0:21:24.794 --> 0:21:28.513
<v Speaker 1>the news headlines about how the ticket sales were going worldwide.

0:21:28.554 --> 0:21:31.914
<v Speaker 1>Apparently in the UK ticket sales are soft.

0:21:32.114 --> 0:21:33.033
<v Speaker 5>Does that surprise you?

0:21:33.114 --> 0:21:36.594
<v Speaker 2>Holy, I can't imagine why love It'd be as keen

0:21:36.634 --> 0:21:38.154
<v Speaker 2>as the Wuthering.

0:21:37.874 --> 0:21:41.114
<v Speaker 4>High Hamna Marti Supreme Millennia.

0:21:41.194 --> 0:21:43.674
<v Speaker 1>Why don't we see look outliers. If you want us

0:21:43.754 --> 0:21:45.594
<v Speaker 1>to go and see it, we will do that for you,

0:21:45.954 --> 0:21:46.594
<v Speaker 1>or I will do it.

0:21:46.594 --> 0:21:47.313
<v Speaker 5>I don't know about you.

0:21:47.394 --> 0:21:49.874
<v Speaker 4>No, I'm actually kind of keen after hearing that trailer.

0:21:49.914 --> 0:21:52.073
<v Speaker 2>I'd quite like to wait for streaming. I don't think

0:21:52.074 --> 0:21:53.154
<v Speaker 2>I'll have to wait too long.

0:21:53.354 --> 0:21:56.634
<v Speaker 5>Life in a moment.

0:21:56.794 --> 0:22:01.513
<v Speaker 1>Reading celebrities text messages makes me feel icky, but I

0:22:01.594 --> 0:22:04.914
<v Speaker 1>can't look away.

0:22:07.234 --> 0:22:08.474
<v Speaker 3>Louders, It's mea here.

0:22:08.514 --> 0:22:09.313
<v Speaker 5>Do you remember me?

0:22:09.914 --> 0:22:11.834
<v Speaker 6>I am back in your ears twice a week on

0:22:11.954 --> 0:22:13.834
<v Speaker 6>Tuesdays and Thursdays.

0:22:13.834 --> 0:22:14.634
<v Speaker 5>I hope you remember me.

0:22:15.074 --> 0:22:19.033
<v Speaker 6>Exclusively for Mum and Maya subscribers. Yesterday I did a

0:22:19.114 --> 0:22:22.914
<v Speaker 6>Royal rap a wrap up, not a rap dance, although

0:22:23.634 --> 0:22:25.793
<v Speaker 6>Holly and Jesse were in the studio for that one.

0:22:25.914 --> 0:22:28.794
<v Speaker 6>So if you're not already a subscriber, follow the link

0:22:28.834 --> 0:22:30.674
<v Speaker 6>in the show notes to get us in your ears

0:22:31.034 --> 0:22:32.314
<v Speaker 6>five days a week.

0:22:33.634 --> 0:22:35.674
<v Speaker 1>We've been reading a lot of text sent by famous

0:22:35.674 --> 0:22:37.154
<v Speaker 1>people recently. Have you noticed that?

0:22:37.514 --> 0:22:37.714
<v Speaker 3>Oh?

0:22:37.754 --> 0:22:40.714
<v Speaker 1>Yes, it's been fascinating but also a little bit troubling

0:22:40.754 --> 0:22:43.594
<v Speaker 1>to get this peek into their lives. And in many ways,

0:22:43.714 --> 0:22:46.154
<v Speaker 1>what I feel like when I read these text message

0:22:46.234 --> 0:22:48.073
<v Speaker 1>is that they're just like us. They text like us,

0:22:48.114 --> 0:22:50.634
<v Speaker 1>they talk like us. They have the same friendship disputes

0:22:50.634 --> 0:22:52.674
<v Speaker 1>and the same kind of bitch sessions about people in

0:22:52.714 --> 0:22:53.154
<v Speaker 1>their lives.

0:22:53.194 --> 0:22:54.314
<v Speaker 4>That's why it's so mortified.

0:22:54.274 --> 0:22:57.394
<v Speaker 1>That's why I can't look away. And Jamila Jamil has

0:22:57.434 --> 0:22:59.834
<v Speaker 1>popped up in some of these text messages in this

0:22:59.994 --> 0:23:03.994
<v Speaker 1>ongoing Blake Lively Justin Baldoni. It ends with us situation

0:23:04.594 --> 0:23:08.593
<v Speaker 1>because she is best friends with Justin Baldoni's publicist, and

0:23:08.714 --> 0:23:11.593
<v Speaker 1>texts have come out between her and the publicist because

0:23:11.634 --> 0:23:13.754
<v Speaker 1>of the ongoing court case, which I'm not even going

0:23:13.834 --> 0:23:15.954
<v Speaker 1>to pretend to summarize for you, who knows where it

0:23:15.994 --> 0:23:16.313
<v Speaker 1>is at this.

0:23:16.314 --> 0:23:19.033
<v Speaker 2>Point, we're not reading all these text messages because the

0:23:19.074 --> 0:23:20.554
<v Speaker 2>celebrities have willingly.

0:23:20.234 --> 0:23:21.194
<v Speaker 3>Handed the moment right.

0:23:21.794 --> 0:23:24.554
<v Speaker 2>They have been subpoened as part of this very complex

0:23:24.754 --> 0:23:25.793
<v Speaker 2>yes exactly.

0:23:26.394 --> 0:23:30.794
<v Speaker 1>Jamil texted Jennifer Abel, who is the Baldoni publicist, about

0:23:30.834 --> 0:23:34.674
<v Speaker 1>Blake Lively. She said she's such a suicide bomber at

0:23:34.674 --> 0:23:37.874
<v Speaker 1>this point, and she also wrote of Lively, I've never

0:23:37.914 --> 0:23:42.114
<v Speaker 1>seen such a bizarre villain act before. Now I don't

0:23:42.114 --> 0:23:44.833
<v Speaker 1>see any problem with this. I think Jamil is just

0:23:44.874 --> 0:23:47.674
<v Speaker 1>being a supportive friend and I don't think there are

0:23:47.674 --> 0:23:50.954
<v Speaker 1>any winners or heroes in this Blake Lively Justin Baldoni thing,

0:23:51.034 --> 0:23:53.154
<v Speaker 1>And if my best friend was involved in it, I

0:23:53.154 --> 0:23:55.194
<v Speaker 1>would also be complaining about Blake Lively.

0:23:55.274 --> 0:23:55.834
<v Speaker 5>Am I wrong?

0:23:56.194 --> 0:23:58.833
<v Speaker 4>I actually completely agree with you. I saw that Jamila

0:23:58.874 --> 0:24:01.234
<v Speaker 4>Jamil had written a substect about it, and it was like,

0:24:01.394 --> 0:24:03.714
<v Speaker 4>I defend my right to say aweful things.

0:24:03.714 --> 0:24:06.674
<v Speaker 5>Don't women say that? She wasn't allowed to say anything.

0:24:06.994 --> 0:24:09.754
<v Speaker 4>I think people went, hang on, you call yourself a feminist.

0:24:09.914 --> 0:24:12.594
<v Speaker 4>And Blake Lively has come out and said she was

0:24:12.594 --> 0:24:16.834
<v Speaker 4>the victim of sexual harassment and a smear campaign. Justin

0:24:16.834 --> 0:24:19.954
<v Speaker 4>Baldoni has denied those allegations, and that's going to court

0:24:19.994 --> 0:24:22.513
<v Speaker 4>in May. I think there is so much confusion about

0:24:22.514 --> 0:24:25.234
<v Speaker 4>what the court case is even about anymore, and why

0:24:25.554 --> 0:24:28.474
<v Speaker 4>we are reading everyone's text messages all the time. What's

0:24:28.554 --> 0:24:32.593
<v Speaker 4>going critical is that these text messages that Jamila Jamil

0:24:32.714 --> 0:24:36.114
<v Speaker 4>sent were actually sent before any of those allegations came

0:24:36.154 --> 0:24:38.394
<v Speaker 4>to life. So she was just seeing bits of the

0:24:38.394 --> 0:24:42.874
<v Speaker 4>press conference where you'll remember Blake Lively was like, go

0:24:42.914 --> 0:24:45.834
<v Speaker 4>watch it ends with us where your florals, and a

0:24:45.874 --> 0:24:49.194
<v Speaker 4>lot of people saw that as distasteful.

0:24:48.714 --> 0:24:51.354
<v Speaker 2>But also she would have because Abel is her friend,

0:24:51.554 --> 0:24:54.474
<v Speaker 2>she would have known about all the drama that we

0:24:54.554 --> 0:24:56.793
<v Speaker 2>did not yet know about at that time, which was

0:24:56.794 --> 0:24:59.154
<v Speaker 2>the whole Blake Lively tried to hijack the movie Blake

0:24:59.234 --> 0:25:02.194
<v Speaker 2>Lively did a recover on, so she would have known

0:25:02.234 --> 0:25:04.634
<v Speaker 2>about all that, which would inform those comments.

0:25:04.714 --> 0:25:08.634
<v Speaker 4>And now these text messages come to light. Question like

0:25:08.754 --> 0:25:11.754
<v Speaker 4>as even as I was reading these, was like, why

0:25:11.794 --> 0:25:13.634
<v Speaker 4>am I reading these? And what do they have to

0:25:13.674 --> 0:25:17.313
<v Speaker 4>do with anything? And why is her name available?

0:25:18.154 --> 0:25:19.314
<v Speaker 3>That's what she says.

0:25:19.194 --> 0:25:22.594
<v Speaker 1>Also in that sort of document dump where text messages

0:25:22.634 --> 0:25:25.234
<v Speaker 1>between Blake Lively and Taylor Swift and I know Mia

0:25:25.354 --> 0:25:27.553
<v Speaker 1>spoke about this on a Subs episode last week, but

0:25:27.634 --> 0:25:31.274
<v Speaker 1>those texts are like so cringe because it's basically about

0:25:31.274 --> 0:25:32.714
<v Speaker 1>Blake being like are you mad at me?

0:25:32.794 --> 0:25:33.914
<v Speaker 5>Which is a text.

0:25:33.594 --> 0:25:35.914
<v Speaker 1>Every woman has sent a close friend at one point

0:25:35.994 --> 0:25:36.394
<v Speaker 1>or another.

0:25:36.994 --> 0:25:38.754
<v Speaker 5>And what I kept thinking.

0:25:38.634 --> 0:25:41.553
<v Speaker 1>Was, God, this is such proof that we do have

0:25:41.594 --> 0:25:43.434
<v Speaker 1>to be more careful about what we put in writing,

0:25:43.514 --> 0:25:46.754
<v Speaker 1>and none of us, not even the celebrities, are paying

0:25:46.834 --> 0:25:47.513
<v Speaker 1>attention to that.

0:25:47.634 --> 0:25:50.794
<v Speaker 4>We're not being savvy because I was reading those as well,

0:25:50.834 --> 0:25:52.874
<v Speaker 4>and I always think, no, one comes across well when

0:25:52.874 --> 0:25:56.954
<v Speaker 4>they're private. Texts aleaked like no one Taylor Swift almost did.

0:25:57.274 --> 0:25:59.994
<v Speaker 4>I thought that the more I read from Taylor Swift,

0:26:00.034 --> 0:26:03.074
<v Speaker 4>the more I went, Oh, I respect you, I respect

0:26:03.194 --> 0:26:05.714
<v Speaker 4>your She was very forthright. She said, Yeah, I'm a

0:26:05.714 --> 0:26:08.033
<v Speaker 4>bit annoyed because You've been talking to me as though

0:26:08.554 --> 0:26:10.314
<v Speaker 4>I'm on the receiving end of a leegal.

0:26:10.594 --> 0:26:11.474
<v Speaker 5>Eck whipmus test.

0:26:11.794 --> 0:26:14.114
<v Speaker 1>A friend who said to you, Jesse in the past,

0:26:14.114 --> 0:26:15.794
<v Speaker 1>are you annoyed at me? I'm sure someone has said

0:26:15.834 --> 0:26:18.714
<v Speaker 1>that to you. Have you ever responded with, yeah, I'm

0:26:18.714 --> 0:26:19.554
<v Speaker 1>a little bit annoyed.

0:26:19.954 --> 0:26:22.553
<v Speaker 4>No, No, that's why I respect it. That's why I

0:26:22.634 --> 0:26:26.994
<v Speaker 4>was like, good on Taylor for kind of acknowledging because

0:26:27.554 --> 0:26:31.074
<v Speaker 4>Blake is really and I can I can understand that

0:26:31.154 --> 0:26:37.194
<v Speaker 4>Blake Lively is paranoid, traumatized, overwhelmed, the whole world has

0:26:37.234 --> 0:26:40.793
<v Speaker 4>turned against her. But you read her messages and you're like,

0:26:40.914 --> 0:26:44.714
<v Speaker 4>i'd be so annoyed, Like they are quite irritating messages.

0:26:45.074 --> 0:26:46.994
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I don't know about that.

0:26:47.194 --> 0:26:50.553
<v Speaker 2>I also was impressed by Taylor Swift's friendship politics handling,

0:26:51.154 --> 0:26:53.994
<v Speaker 2>but also those messages prove that what Justin Baldoni was

0:26:54.034 --> 0:26:56.394
<v Speaker 2>saying was right is that Taylor Swift was very much

0:26:56.474 --> 0:26:57.914
<v Speaker 2>on Blake's side.

0:26:57.994 --> 0:27:01.273
<v Speaker 5>I think what we see in those texts is Blake making.

0:27:00.954 --> 0:27:04.914
<v Speaker 7>A lot of asks of Taylor, say this to justin

0:27:05.354 --> 0:27:08.994
<v Speaker 7>read this script, like watch this cut, and we don't

0:27:09.074 --> 0:27:12.474
<v Speaker 7>actually see Taylor necessarily following through on any of that.

0:27:12.594 --> 0:27:14.434
<v Speaker 4>I can see Taylor feeling used.

0:27:14.634 --> 0:27:15.674
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, fair enough.

0:27:15.714 --> 0:27:18.154
<v Speaker 2>But the point I'm thinking about the day that she

0:27:18.234 --> 0:27:20.594
<v Speaker 2>goes over there and then Blake says you were.

0:27:20.554 --> 0:27:22.434
<v Speaker 3>A lion today or whatever.

0:27:23.154 --> 0:27:25.634
<v Speaker 2>I'm thinking about all that stuff before the point, like

0:27:25.954 --> 0:27:28.874
<v Speaker 2>clearly she did stick up for her mate until the

0:27:28.954 --> 0:27:30.674
<v Speaker 2>point where it all became too annoying.

0:27:30.954 --> 0:27:34.034
<v Speaker 3>All well, and then it seems backed away slowly.

0:27:34.394 --> 0:27:38.354
<v Speaker 2>But I think what's interesting about this and the fact,

0:27:38.354 --> 0:27:41.914
<v Speaker 2>like I read Jamila Jamil's newsletter about the horror of

0:27:41.954 --> 0:27:45.314
<v Speaker 2>having your group texts leaked whatever they say, and as

0:27:45.314 --> 0:27:47.994
<v Speaker 2>you've said, we can all respond to that. But one

0:27:47.994 --> 0:27:51.074
<v Speaker 2>of the problems with this is it's so mortifying. It

0:27:51.234 --> 0:27:54.354
<v Speaker 2>can only really have a chilling effect. Like you hear

0:27:54.354 --> 0:27:57.514
<v Speaker 2>people say all the time, why would I, for argument's sake,

0:27:57.994 --> 0:28:01.553
<v Speaker 2>sue my sexually harassing boss If every single message and

0:28:01.634 --> 0:28:03.794
<v Speaker 2>every single thing I've ever said about him, and every

0:28:03.834 --> 0:28:06.154
<v Speaker 2>group text I ever sent to my girlfriends, and maybe

0:28:06.234 --> 0:28:08.114
<v Speaker 2>once I said that I thought he was handsome or

0:28:08.114 --> 0:28:10.074
<v Speaker 2>whatever is all going to come out in court now

0:28:10.114 --> 0:28:14.074
<v Speaker 2>that we all know is very often weaponized. But it's

0:28:14.394 --> 0:28:17.794
<v Speaker 2>very interesting because to your earlier point, Emeli, we all

0:28:18.354 --> 0:28:20.714
<v Speaker 2>like to imagine that what we say online is private,

0:28:20.794 --> 0:28:22.754
<v Speaker 2>but we know and we know, and we know and

0:28:22.794 --> 0:28:25.554
<v Speaker 2>we know that it absolutely is not, and yet we

0:28:25.594 --> 0:28:26.514
<v Speaker 2>can't help ourselves.

0:28:26.634 --> 0:28:29.194
<v Speaker 4>We can't help ourselves. And this is I have had

0:28:29.954 --> 0:28:33.313
<v Speaker 4>friends say this. I know high profile people who have

0:28:33.354 --> 0:28:38.114
<v Speaker 4>said this, that they feel hamstrung that they can't sue

0:28:38.354 --> 0:28:40.994
<v Speaker 4>or pursue something in a court of law because they're like,

0:28:41.194 --> 0:28:46.514
<v Speaker 4>my text message is irrelevant. Text messages will be printed

0:28:46.554 --> 0:28:49.354
<v Speaker 4>and made for public consumption, and no one remembers what

0:28:49.394 --> 0:28:52.314
<v Speaker 4>the court case is even for. So it's like, in

0:28:52.434 --> 0:28:55.954
<v Speaker 4>terms of who is actually behind this court case, it

0:28:55.954 --> 0:28:58.274
<v Speaker 4>would look like Blake Lively is on trial, which I

0:28:58.274 --> 0:29:00.194
<v Speaker 4>suppose you sort of are if you ever bring a

0:29:00.234 --> 0:29:01.074
<v Speaker 4>court case forward.

0:29:01.274 --> 0:29:04.114
<v Speaker 1>Imagine then having your text on the front page of

0:29:04.154 --> 0:29:06.674
<v Speaker 1>the newspaper. And I have to admit it's making me

0:29:06.754 --> 0:29:09.274
<v Speaker 1>really start thinking about the fact that I wish I

0:29:09.314 --> 0:29:12.074
<v Speaker 1>could be more careful in my tones, like.

0:29:12.474 --> 0:29:14.914
<v Speaker 4>Yeah in theory. I think that for thirty seconds and

0:29:14.914 --> 0:29:17.354
<v Speaker 4>then I get on my phone and just like there's

0:29:17.394 --> 0:29:19.434
<v Speaker 4>a bit that Jamila Jamil wrote no newsletter that was

0:29:19.514 --> 0:29:22.674
<v Speaker 4>spot on. She said, sometimes in a moment of hurt

0:29:22.754 --> 0:29:25.874
<v Speaker 4>or weakness, we actually genuinely feel something dark and unfair.

0:29:26.154 --> 0:29:28.314
<v Speaker 4>We just want to say the unsayable in response to

0:29:28.354 --> 0:29:30.474
<v Speaker 4>a culture of thought policing. We want to touch that

0:29:30.514 --> 0:29:32.874
<v Speaker 4>red button. We make duck jokes, we say on savory

0:29:32.874 --> 0:29:35.954
<v Speaker 4>things away from those who could be hurt by our words.

0:29:35.994 --> 0:29:37.714
<v Speaker 4>We want to shock, we want to make someone laugh.

0:29:37.754 --> 0:29:39.594
<v Speaker 4>We want to buy back. We want to be the

0:29:39.674 --> 0:29:43.674
<v Speaker 4>smaller man. We want violence, we want vengeance. And I'm like,

0:29:44.034 --> 0:29:44.514
<v Speaker 4>I get it.

0:29:44.674 --> 0:29:47.514
<v Speaker 3>Don't put it in writing. There's this button on your phone.

0:29:47.714 --> 0:29:49.674
<v Speaker 2>You press it, you get to talk to the person

0:29:49.714 --> 0:29:51.394
<v Speaker 2>that you want to talk to, and you can have.

0:29:51.394 --> 0:29:53.274
<v Speaker 5>Aig old round about it that it is so generic.

0:29:54.114 --> 0:29:56.674
<v Speaker 2>But we avoid all this. If you just call and

0:29:56.714 --> 0:29:59.834
<v Speaker 2>you go putting anything in writing.

0:29:59.794 --> 0:30:01.994
<v Speaker 5>You got to be careful. But holy are you living that?

0:30:02.234 --> 0:30:05.114
<v Speaker 1>Because I'm still a lot of bitch in this day

0:30:05.154 --> 0:30:09.394
<v Speaker 1>and age to say it, But I doult You've got discipline.

0:30:08.914 --> 0:30:11.834
<v Speaker 2>No, not really, but I I don't trust them, you

0:30:11.874 --> 0:30:14.594
<v Speaker 2>know what i mean, Like even without the I mean,

0:30:14.634 --> 0:30:16.554
<v Speaker 2>I'm not a famous person who's going to be invaded,

0:30:16.594 --> 0:30:20.154
<v Speaker 2>but I've got friends who will just randomly add people

0:30:20.194 --> 0:30:21.034
<v Speaker 2>to the group chats in.

0:30:21.034 --> 0:30:21.634
<v Speaker 3>A whole minute.

0:30:21.674 --> 0:30:24.954
<v Speaker 2>And so I'm always thinking, has anyone ever said anything

0:30:24.954 --> 0:30:27.034
<v Speaker 2>about that person back in the history, like is it

0:30:27.074 --> 0:30:29.754
<v Speaker 2>this or that? You know, like none of us ordinary

0:30:29.794 --> 0:30:33.114
<v Speaker 2>people are text savvy enough to protect ourselves from just

0:30:33.194 --> 0:30:36.114
<v Speaker 2>the little fires that will start in our friendship groups.

0:30:35.794 --> 0:30:38.274
<v Speaker 3>And the the snubs.

0:30:38.314 --> 0:30:40.274
<v Speaker 2>And though you had you had a thing and you

0:30:40.314 --> 0:30:42.754
<v Speaker 2>didn't invite me, or like I'd forgotten Betty's in that group,

0:30:42.794 --> 0:30:44.474
<v Speaker 2>but I said this thing about Betty, Like.

0:30:44.994 --> 0:30:47.874
<v Speaker 3>In our tiny little lives, we're not disciplined at all.

0:30:47.994 --> 0:30:51.594
<v Speaker 4>I think as well, there was something so confronting about

0:30:51.594 --> 0:30:53.754
<v Speaker 4>the email that Blake Lively sent Ben.

0:30:53.554 --> 0:30:58.114
<v Speaker 2>Affleck Oh that to me was the most cringing to

0:30:58.154 --> 0:31:02.034
<v Speaker 2>do with anything. Just for a tiny bit of context,

0:31:02.034 --> 0:31:04.914
<v Speaker 2>I know it's all too complicated, but basically it is

0:31:04.994 --> 0:31:08.274
<v Speaker 2>true that Blake and Ryan Reynolds, her husband, took a

0:31:08.354 --> 0:31:10.674
<v Speaker 2>cut of the movie from Justin Balderoni and.

0:31:10.674 --> 0:31:11.394
<v Speaker 3>Redid it right?

0:31:11.394 --> 0:31:13.674
<v Speaker 2>They basically did, and there's a lot of chitty chat

0:31:13.714 --> 0:31:16.114
<v Speaker 2>about that, and then they sent it to all of

0:31:16.154 --> 0:31:19.114
<v Speaker 2>their famous friends and said, give us feedback, tell us

0:31:19.114 --> 0:31:19.594
<v Speaker 2>what you think.

0:31:19.634 --> 0:31:22.234
<v Speaker 3>But the cringe worthiness of the language, the.

0:31:22.274 --> 0:31:25.154
<v Speaker 4>Language, and I think that it's because we probably see

0:31:25.154 --> 0:31:27.674
<v Speaker 4>some of ourselves in it, right, is because we've all

0:31:27.714 --> 0:31:30.194
<v Speaker 4>asked for favors from people in the industry, and we

0:31:30.274 --> 0:31:32.434
<v Speaker 4>know that in order to ask those favors, we have

0:31:32.554 --> 0:31:35.314
<v Speaker 4>to absolutely grovel, And.

0:31:35.714 --> 0:31:38.754
<v Speaker 1>So it's not so much even like the favors. What

0:31:38.834 --> 0:31:41.034
<v Speaker 1>I related to is we've all been in a situation

0:31:41.074 --> 0:31:43.634
<v Speaker 1>where we cannot stop thinking about something where we feel

0:31:43.674 --> 0:31:46.554
<v Speaker 1>we have been uniquely agreed and you can't stop talking

0:31:46.554 --> 0:31:47.834
<v Speaker 1>to every person in your life.

0:31:47.874 --> 0:31:48.354
<v Speaker 3>Yeahbout it?

0:31:48.474 --> 0:31:49.234
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, And that's why.

0:31:49.274 --> 0:31:52.034
<v Speaker 4>And it's being printed. So she's like, Ben, it's Blake,

0:31:52.074 --> 0:31:55.074
<v Speaker 4>don't hang up. I'm writing with a zero pressure ask

0:31:55.434 --> 0:31:58.594
<v Speaker 4>I've just come out the other side of well, almost

0:31:58.674 --> 0:32:01.074
<v Speaker 4>the most upsetting experience I've ever had on a movie.

0:32:01.554 --> 0:32:03.714
<v Speaker 4>And then she kind of makes these jokes and then

0:32:03.714 --> 0:32:07.274
<v Speaker 4>she says Ryan has asked Matt Damon to watch as well.

0:32:07.514 --> 0:32:10.034
<v Speaker 4>Can you believe Jason Bourne is watching my movie. I'll

0:32:10.034 --> 0:32:11.874
<v Speaker 4>get you an autograph one day, don't worry you.

0:32:11.914 --> 0:32:17.834
<v Speaker 1>Just it's that meme of ben Affleck with the cigarette

0:32:17.874 --> 0:32:20.194
<v Speaker 1>and the duncan you know, head up?

0:32:20.234 --> 0:32:23.554
<v Speaker 4>And he's just and you know that ben Affleck got

0:32:23.554 --> 0:32:24.074
<v Speaker 4>that email.

0:32:24.434 --> 0:32:27.074
<v Speaker 5>He's dealing with the two Jennifers. He can't deal with

0:32:27.114 --> 0:32:27.634
<v Speaker 5>this as well.

0:32:27.674 --> 0:32:29.434
<v Speaker 4>And he's savvy enough to pick up the phone and

0:32:29.434 --> 0:32:32.394
<v Speaker 4>he called Matt. He went, Matte, have you got this

0:32:32.554 --> 0:32:36.514
<v Speaker 4>fucking email from Blake? Are you actually watching it? I

0:32:36.554 --> 0:32:39.034
<v Speaker 4>Am not getting dragged into this. I have enough drama

0:32:39.114 --> 0:32:39.954
<v Speaker 4>going on right now. No.

0:32:40.034 --> 0:32:41.274
<v Speaker 5>But you know why Matt.

0:32:41.114 --> 0:32:44.234
<v Speaker 1>Responded because she was savvy enough just to send the

0:32:44.314 --> 0:32:46.394
<v Speaker 1>message to Matt, to Matt and his wife.

0:32:46.794 --> 0:32:50.114
<v Speaker 5>And women feel a need to respond to emails. Yes,

0:32:50.554 --> 0:32:51.314
<v Speaker 5>And Matt.

0:32:51.154 --> 0:32:55.394
<v Speaker 1>Damon's wife dautifully responded and hit the ball back and

0:32:55.514 --> 0:32:58.914
<v Speaker 1>bothered with Blake because women take on that emotional.

0:32:58.554 --> 0:32:59.914
<v Speaker 5>Letter of correspondence. Yeah.

0:32:59.954 --> 0:33:02.634
<v Speaker 2>The thing that's most surprising to me after reading all

0:33:02.674 --> 0:33:05.154
<v Speaker 2>this is that that movie ever came out, that they

0:33:05.194 --> 0:33:06.954
<v Speaker 2>ever thought no one was going to find out about

0:33:06.994 --> 0:33:10.074
<v Speaker 2>all that it was a massive hit. Because also the

0:33:10.154 --> 0:33:12.314
<v Speaker 2>hypocrisy of Hollywood is on clear display.

0:33:13.194 --> 0:33:15.274
<v Speaker 4>If you'll allow me. I would like to update you

0:33:15.354 --> 0:33:18.834
<v Speaker 4>both on the status of the Brooklyn Beckham v. Please

0:33:19.034 --> 0:33:21.474
<v Speaker 4>please Beckham brand feud right.

0:33:21.514 --> 0:33:23.914
<v Speaker 3>It obsessed us all for a few days. And then

0:33:23.954 --> 0:33:27.034
<v Speaker 3>have you moved on? I was a little bit moved on,

0:33:27.234 --> 0:33:29.274
<v Speaker 3>but I I still want to know what's no no.

0:33:29.314 --> 0:33:32.554
<v Speaker 4>I thought I'd moved on, and then Tory put a

0:33:32.594 --> 0:33:34.554
<v Speaker 4>picture up with the Spice girls and I have not

0:33:34.634 --> 0:33:37.874
<v Speaker 4>moved on. I have still heavily invested. So firstly, two

0:33:37.914 --> 0:33:41.114
<v Speaker 4>of Brooklyn's ex girlfriends have come out in support of him.

0:33:41.194 --> 0:33:42.314
<v Speaker 5>This is so damning.

0:33:42.474 --> 0:33:45.794
<v Speaker 4>This is damning, Like I keep wondering if the ex

0:33:45.834 --> 0:33:47.474
<v Speaker 4>girlfriends reached out to Brooklyn first.

0:33:47.674 --> 0:33:50.074
<v Speaker 1>I'm not speaking out against my like in support of

0:33:50.074 --> 0:33:51.274
<v Speaker 1>my ex's on literally.

0:33:52.794 --> 0:33:57.154
<v Speaker 4>Okay, So the first one Aften McKeith. I used to

0:33:57.194 --> 0:34:00.034
<v Speaker 4>watch this show called like Embarrassing Bodies or something in

0:34:00.074 --> 0:34:01.914
<v Speaker 4>the UK, and I'm pretty sure her mum was on

0:34:01.994 --> 0:34:04.714
<v Speaker 4>it and she was anyway, I'm obsessed with this. Google

0:34:04.794 --> 0:34:05.994
<v Speaker 4>her mum. She's famous.

0:34:06.554 --> 0:34:06.954
<v Speaker 5>Often.

0:34:07.354 --> 0:34:10.513
<v Speaker 4>Keith dated Brooklyn in twenty seventeen and she saw these

0:34:10.554 --> 0:34:13.194
<v Speaker 4>Instagram stories last week and then she went, you know who,

0:34:13.194 --> 0:34:15.873
<v Speaker 4>I need to talk to the Sun so she called

0:34:15.914 --> 0:34:17.634
<v Speaker 4>up the Sun and she said it was hard for

0:34:17.714 --> 0:34:20.274
<v Speaker 4>him growing up. There are two sides to every story,

0:34:20.354 --> 0:34:22.913
<v Speaker 4>but I know growing up in the spotlight was very

0:34:22.994 --> 0:34:26.674
<v Speaker 4>challenging for him. And she recalled that whenever he got

0:34:26.674 --> 0:34:29.474
<v Speaker 4>his picture taken by the paparazzi, he was really upset.

0:34:29.594 --> 0:34:33.433
<v Speaker 4>She talked about his anxiety and how his parents were

0:34:33.474 --> 0:34:37.594
<v Speaker 4>away a lot and that left him feeling isolated. Then

0:34:37.794 --> 0:34:42.834
<v Speaker 4>another ex named Talia Storm, who was Brooklyn's teenage girlfriend.

0:34:42.914 --> 0:34:45.074
<v Speaker 3>Talia storm yame love it.

0:34:45.314 --> 0:34:48.114
<v Speaker 4>Victoria is, like I thought I'd heard the last view

0:34:48.154 --> 0:34:53.914
<v Speaker 4>Talia Storm. Well, apparently Victoria never liked her. She Talia

0:34:54.274 --> 0:34:57.314
<v Speaker 4>called the Mirror and she said, my first wife, Victoria

0:34:57.394 --> 0:35:00.953
<v Speaker 4>never liked She said. My first thought was good for him.

0:35:00.994 --> 0:35:03.314
<v Speaker 4>People have all heard a million stories over the years,

0:35:03.314 --> 0:35:06.033
<v Speaker 4>and I just thank God, bless Brooklyn for coming out

0:35:06.034 --> 0:35:07.114
<v Speaker 4>and sticking up for himself.

0:35:07.154 --> 0:35:07.434
<v Speaker 5>Elf.

0:35:07.474 --> 0:35:11.554
<v Speaker 4>I think he's just had enough. So this is all happening.

0:35:11.914 --> 0:35:13.873
<v Speaker 4>And then the Spice.

0:35:13.634 --> 0:35:14.594
<v Speaker 5>Girls picture drops.

0:35:14.714 --> 0:35:17.354
<v Speaker 4>So Victoria Beckham, I guess she's at an event or

0:35:17.354 --> 0:35:18.834
<v Speaker 4>something and she's.

0:35:18.554 --> 0:35:23.714
<v Speaker 3>With somebody babies, babies, baby, okay.

0:35:23.314 --> 0:35:26.754
<v Speaker 4>And so more of them. Look I am a little bit.

0:35:29.154 --> 0:35:31.033
<v Speaker 5>Jerry was there, Jerry was there. One of the main

0:35:31.554 --> 0:35:31.993
<v Speaker 5>wasn't there.

0:35:32.074 --> 0:35:33.754
<v Speaker 4>Okay, That's what I need to ask you about because

0:35:33.794 --> 0:35:36.194
<v Speaker 4>I'm a little bit rusty on my Spice girl's law.

0:35:37.034 --> 0:35:37.794
<v Speaker 4>Is there friction?

0:35:37.994 --> 0:35:38.993
<v Speaker 5>They don't like each other?

0:35:39.554 --> 0:35:42.114
<v Speaker 4>Okay, so we had they all showed.

0:35:41.874 --> 0:35:45.234
<v Speaker 5>Up for Jerry's fiftieth. I need to point that out. Okay,

0:35:45.274 --> 0:35:48.074
<v Speaker 5>maybe baby's actually not easy to get along with.

0:35:48.194 --> 0:35:48.634
<v Speaker 1>I don't know.

0:35:48.834 --> 0:35:51.234
<v Speaker 4>Okay, because there were four of the five Spice Girls

0:35:51.274 --> 0:35:54.513
<v Speaker 4>and everyone got very excited about that. And then I

0:35:54.554 --> 0:35:58.393
<v Speaker 4>think Victoria got given an award that's also a by

0:35:58.394 --> 0:36:01.314
<v Speaker 4>the French. Everyone was there, lots of picture the.

0:36:01.234 --> 0:36:03.514
<v Speaker 1>Best people to give you awards because it always happens

0:36:03.514 --> 0:36:04.674
<v Speaker 1>in like a fancy chateau.

0:36:04.994 --> 0:36:09.274
<v Speaker 2>Yes, told us everything about the Beckham strategy. They are

0:36:09.354 --> 0:36:13.154
<v Speaker 2>keeping calm and carrying on because basically, although everybody said

0:36:13.194 --> 0:36:14.553
<v Speaker 2>last week and we talked about this on the show,

0:36:14.594 --> 0:36:17.714
<v Speaker 2>oh David, he's responded in Davos, he didn't. He just

0:36:17.794 --> 0:36:19.513
<v Speaker 2>had that on the schedule and he had to do it.

0:36:19.874 --> 0:36:23.274
<v Speaker 2>This Paris thing is very much. She did what she

0:36:23.274 --> 0:36:26.834
<v Speaker 2>would have always done. Everybody went, everybody wore their nice dresses,

0:36:26.914 --> 0:36:29.754
<v Speaker 2>everybody smiled at the camera, the sons, the girlfriend's harper.

0:36:30.154 --> 0:36:34.114
<v Speaker 2>She is just keep the playbook, keep going faces forward,

0:36:34.234 --> 0:36:36.274
<v Speaker 2>everybody spit wash your face.

0:36:36.474 --> 0:36:37.234
<v Speaker 3>We're getting on with it.

0:36:37.394 --> 0:36:38.674
<v Speaker 4>Do you reckon We're done?

0:36:38.994 --> 0:36:41.913
<v Speaker 2>I think from the Beckham side, I do not think

0:36:41.914 --> 0:36:43.794
<v Speaker 2>they are about to spill their guts. I don't think

0:36:43.794 --> 0:36:47.194
<v Speaker 2>Brooklyn's done because Brooklyn and Nikola have got a huge

0:36:47.234 --> 0:36:51.474
<v Speaker 2>boost from this publicity wise, because as often discussed, what

0:36:51.674 --> 0:36:55.234
<v Speaker 2>do they do right? So their profile is brasing.

0:36:56.074 --> 0:36:57.634
<v Speaker 5>Holly, you have the hot sauce?

0:36:57.674 --> 0:37:00.234
<v Speaker 1>Do you know how many iterations there were before on

0:37:00.274 --> 0:37:02.994
<v Speaker 1>the right formula trying your hot sauce?

0:37:02.994 --> 0:37:04.554
<v Speaker 2>I nearly run out of it and I will be

0:37:04.634 --> 0:37:06.794
<v Speaker 2>sad when that happens, because it's fricking delicious.

0:37:06.794 --> 0:37:08.034
<v Speaker 3>But that's true. Okay.

0:37:08.074 --> 0:37:11.154
<v Speaker 2>So apart from test out hot saws in one of

0:37:11.194 --> 0:37:13.954
<v Speaker 2>their many mansions, what do they do? So this is

0:37:13.994 --> 0:37:16.314
<v Speaker 2>great for them? And as we talked about last week,

0:37:16.354 --> 0:37:17.834
<v Speaker 2>apparently the rumors of the book.

0:37:17.714 --> 0:37:21.514
<v Speaker 4>Are headlines great which books all?

0:37:22.194 --> 0:37:24.514
<v Speaker 2>Nicola will do a tell all that Brooklyn will do

0:37:24.514 --> 0:37:29.154
<v Speaker 2>a Harry. Basically, no, I think the Brooklyn will write

0:37:29.154 --> 0:37:31.873
<v Speaker 2>oh good. But I think that these things are all.

0:37:32.074 --> 0:37:34.354
<v Speaker 2>I don't think that Brooklyn has done. But I think

0:37:34.394 --> 0:37:38.874
<v Speaker 2>that for now we've seen the Beckhams decide to keep going.

0:37:39.954 --> 0:37:42.354
<v Speaker 2>And there was a little bit of shade thrown by

0:37:42.394 --> 0:37:46.034
<v Speaker 2>the boys. They posted a TikTok cruise and Romeo with

0:37:46.114 --> 0:37:47.954
<v Speaker 2>their girlfriends and Harper I think in the back of

0:37:47.994 --> 0:37:50.553
<v Speaker 2>the car and they were doing some silly TikTok trend

0:37:50.594 --> 0:37:52.634
<v Speaker 2>and it was like, imagine hating and we're just here

0:37:52.674 --> 0:37:55.914
<v Speaker 2>like that. But I mean it wasn't exactly skating. No,

0:37:56.234 --> 0:37:58.794
<v Speaker 2>I think they're going to keep trying. I just imagine

0:37:58.794 --> 0:38:01.114
<v Speaker 2>that Vicky is telling those boys every day Romeo and

0:38:01.514 --> 0:38:02.474
<v Speaker 2>do not do not.

0:38:02.674 --> 0:38:04.873
<v Speaker 3>I don't want to hear it. No posting, but they're

0:38:04.914 --> 0:38:06.834
<v Speaker 3>going I hate him.

0:38:07.114 --> 0:38:07.873
<v Speaker 1>What are.

0:38:09.834 --> 0:38:10.554
<v Speaker 3>After the break?

0:38:10.834 --> 0:38:13.434
<v Speaker 2>What is the right way to show up in public

0:38:13.634 --> 0:38:18.474
<v Speaker 2>after your partner has publicly humiliated you. An Australian influencer

0:38:18.714 --> 0:38:26.394
<v Speaker 2>has a new playbook for us.

0:38:27.674 --> 0:38:30.034
<v Speaker 3>Friends, gather around. I have a story and a question.

0:38:31.234 --> 0:38:32.074
<v Speaker 3>This story was.

0:38:32.114 --> 0:38:35.674
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely everywhere over Christmas and New Year when we were

0:38:35.674 --> 0:38:36.114
<v Speaker 2>not on the.

0:38:36.074 --> 0:38:38.393
<v Speaker 4>Air, right I totally missed it. I came back, I

0:38:38.434 --> 0:38:41.194
<v Speaker 4>heard bits and pieces and I'm desperate for you to

0:38:41.234 --> 0:38:41.754
<v Speaker 4>fill me in.

0:38:42.714 --> 0:38:44.993
<v Speaker 2>We also one of the reasons why we haven't talked

0:38:44.994 --> 0:38:46.594
<v Speaker 2>about it is also because it is a bit icky,

0:38:46.994 --> 0:38:49.194
<v Speaker 2>but it keeps getting more public. So we are going

0:38:49.234 --> 0:38:51.474
<v Speaker 2>to talk about it because I think there are some

0:38:51.594 --> 0:38:55.754
<v Speaker 2>lessons in here for us all. When your relationship explodes

0:38:55.794 --> 0:38:59.594
<v Speaker 2>in spectacular fashion and you are betrayed and humiliated, whether

0:38:59.634 --> 0:39:02.354
<v Speaker 2>that's either in your little community, because this is something.

0:39:02.114 --> 0:39:03.554
<v Speaker 3>Like, you've still got to show up at work.

0:39:03.754 --> 0:39:06.473
<v Speaker 2>Everybody knows that your marriage has gone through a bad time, whatever,

0:39:06.514 --> 0:39:07.913
<v Speaker 2>You've still got to show up at the schoolgate. You

0:39:07.954 --> 0:39:09.554
<v Speaker 2>still got to go whatever it is right. You know,

0:39:09.554 --> 0:39:12.473
<v Speaker 2>people talking about how are you meant to behave when

0:39:12.474 --> 0:39:15.114
<v Speaker 2>you're the wronged woman? Are you meant to a hideaway?

0:39:15.554 --> 0:39:18.674
<v Speaker 2>Lick your wounds, protect your peace? You might have some

0:39:18.834 --> 0:39:22.674
<v Speaker 2>shame attached to it. Let that fade, reassure the kids

0:39:22.674 --> 0:39:26.434
<v Speaker 2>everything's going to be fine, or do you go hard relaunch?

0:39:26.514 --> 0:39:29.674
<v Speaker 3>I will survive. Fuck you all of that stuff. The

0:39:29.714 --> 0:39:32.634
<v Speaker 3>Lily Allen Roote, We could call it the Lily Allen Root.

0:39:32.994 --> 0:39:36.873
<v Speaker 2>Tabloid readers and Instagram scrollers have been watching this particular

0:39:36.914 --> 0:39:40.794
<v Speaker 2>decision being made in real time by Australian influencer.

0:39:41.154 --> 0:39:42.594
<v Speaker 3>She used to be called a wag.

0:39:42.674 --> 0:39:44.594
<v Speaker 2>She hates being called a wag, but all the wags

0:39:44.594 --> 0:39:47.274
<v Speaker 2>hate being called a wag. She is a wag or

0:39:47.314 --> 0:39:52.314
<v Speaker 2>she was Jules Neil? Right, she has picked aside and

0:39:52.354 --> 0:39:54.954
<v Speaker 2>she's picked the second one and yesterday she went publics

0:39:54.994 --> 0:39:55.154
<v Speaker 2>with it.

0:39:55.274 --> 0:39:56.953
<v Speaker 3>Do you know who I'm talking about when I said

0:39:56.994 --> 0:39:57.754
<v Speaker 3>Jules Neil.

0:39:57.634 --> 0:40:00.433
<v Speaker 4>I had never heard her name before this morning. Who

0:40:00.674 --> 0:40:03.114
<v Speaker 4>was she married too? Or is she married?

0:40:03.234 --> 0:40:06.434
<v Speaker 2>Jules Neil is married to Lucky Neil. He's an AFL

0:40:06.434 --> 0:40:09.234
<v Speaker 2>player and he's a big deal AFL player. Until a

0:40:09.234 --> 0:40:11.553
<v Speaker 2>hot minute ago, he was captain of the Brisbane Lines.

0:40:11.594 --> 0:40:14.634
<v Speaker 2>The Brisbane Lines won the premiership last year, so he's

0:40:14.914 --> 0:40:18.594
<v Speaker 2>the lead player in the most successful team in the country.

0:40:18.874 --> 0:40:20.314
<v Speaker 2>He's won the Brownlow twice.

0:40:20.394 --> 0:40:21.514
<v Speaker 3>He's a big deal. Okay.

0:40:22.154 --> 0:40:25.354
<v Speaker 2>His wife is called Jules Neil. They were teenage sweethearts.

0:40:25.354 --> 0:40:28.314
<v Speaker 2>They have been together forever. They are from Perth. They

0:40:28.354 --> 0:40:30.634
<v Speaker 2>got married in twenty eighteen. They've got two little kids

0:40:30.674 --> 0:40:33.234
<v Speaker 2>under four. She is a bit of an influencer, not

0:40:33.394 --> 0:40:36.634
<v Speaker 2>like a big deal influencer, but like she's always had

0:40:36.674 --> 0:40:38.634
<v Speaker 2>a quite a public profile, posting.

0:40:38.274 --> 0:40:39.874
<v Speaker 3>About their lifestyle and the babies.

0:40:39.874 --> 0:40:42.393
<v Speaker 2>And obviously they moved to Brisbane and when they moved

0:40:42.434 --> 0:40:46.394
<v Speaker 2>to Brisbane, she became really good friends with Tess Crosley,

0:40:46.914 --> 0:40:50.834
<v Speaker 2>who was an influencer and entrepreneur and interestingly a former

0:40:50.874 --> 0:40:51.714
<v Speaker 2>Mormon missionary.

0:40:51.714 --> 0:40:54.154
<v Speaker 3>We won't go down that rabbit hole, but oh my god,

0:40:54.274 --> 0:40:54.834
<v Speaker 3>I love that.

0:40:56.114 --> 0:40:58.634
<v Speaker 2>And as beck Day wrote on Mama Mia this week,

0:40:58.754 --> 0:41:02.314
<v Speaker 2>the pair were the ultimate influencer BFFs, posting together from

0:41:02.354 --> 0:41:05.393
<v Speaker 2>AFL red carpets, lux holidays, and footy games, as well

0:41:05.434 --> 0:41:08.634
<v Speaker 2>as for a time co hosting a podcast together where

0:41:08.634 --> 0:41:11.274
<v Speaker 2>they discussed their lives, fashion, and the reality for Jewels

0:41:11.314 --> 0:41:14.594
<v Speaker 2>being in the AFL spotlight. The two families social media

0:41:14.674 --> 0:41:18.873
<v Speaker 2>was intertwined, shared holidays, social outings, and dinners populating both

0:41:18.874 --> 0:41:21.874
<v Speaker 2>women's feeds. I bet you can guess what's going to happen.

0:41:22.114 --> 0:41:24.154
<v Speaker 2>Apparently they live five minutes away from each other and

0:41:24.194 --> 0:41:28.154
<v Speaker 2>everything's cozy until in December, Instagram detectives noticed that the

0:41:28.194 --> 0:41:30.834
<v Speaker 2>pair had unfollowed each other and that Jewels.

0:41:30.554 --> 0:41:32.834
<v Speaker 3>Had deleted all the pictures of tests from her feed.

0:41:33.234 --> 0:41:36.194
<v Speaker 2>And then in December, Jewles abruptly moves back to Perth

0:41:36.234 --> 0:41:38.594
<v Speaker 2>with the kids. So Lockey's wife moves back to Perth,

0:41:39.034 --> 0:41:41.754
<v Speaker 2>and when stories started to appear about this, she posted

0:41:41.794 --> 0:41:44.714
<v Speaker 2>on Instagram story. This is why this has become very

0:41:44.754 --> 0:41:47.994
<v Speaker 2>popul because she commented She posted on an Instagram story

0:41:48.314 --> 0:41:52.154
<v Speaker 2>Brooklyn Beckham style, outlining in no uncertain terms where she

0:41:52.194 --> 0:41:55.073
<v Speaker 2>stood with the separation. I want to make it very

0:41:55.114 --> 0:41:58.674
<v Speaker 2>clear that I am not working through anything she posted.

0:41:59.154 --> 0:42:03.314
<v Speaker 2>I have been betrayed in the most unimaginable way. All

0:42:03.354 --> 0:42:05.274
<v Speaker 2>I can do now is try to heal and do

0:42:05.314 --> 0:42:10.274
<v Speaker 2>what's best for my children. And the tabloid world went so.

0:42:10.554 --> 0:42:15.393
<v Speaker 4>The translation is that Lockeye, the football captain, has had

0:42:15.914 --> 0:42:16.594
<v Speaker 4>an affair.

0:42:16.714 --> 0:42:20.393
<v Speaker 2>Well, nothing has been confirmed in that way, but if

0:42:20.394 --> 0:42:24.154
<v Speaker 2>we would expect, stories fly that another footballer's partner found

0:42:24.194 --> 0:42:26.194
<v Speaker 2>Locke and Tess in a car together.

0:42:25.954 --> 0:42:27.674
<v Speaker 3>Told Jules and all hell bros.

0:42:27.754 --> 0:42:31.554
<v Speaker 2>Right, that's never been confirmed. But what definitely did happen,

0:42:31.594 --> 0:42:34.194
<v Speaker 2>which tells us that we all know something really happened,

0:42:34.514 --> 0:42:36.794
<v Speaker 2>is that Locke quits his job. He is still playing,

0:42:36.834 --> 0:42:38.953
<v Speaker 2>to be clear, but he gave up his captaincy, which

0:42:38.994 --> 0:42:41.274
<v Speaker 2>is a big deal when you rise to that point.

0:42:41.754 --> 0:42:44.674
<v Speaker 2>He's got the most high profile job in all of AFL.

0:42:44.754 --> 0:42:47.274
<v Speaker 2>And on January the second, I think earlier this year,

0:42:47.674 --> 0:42:50.274
<v Speaker 2>he stands up and gives a press conference where he

0:42:50.434 --> 0:42:54.114
<v Speaker 2>confirmed he'd done something, and he stepped down as captain confirmed.

0:42:54.914 --> 0:42:57.834
<v Speaker 2>He says this, I can confirm that Jules and I

0:42:57.874 --> 0:43:01.354
<v Speaker 2>have separated. I have let my family down. He's standing

0:43:01.394 --> 0:43:03.354
<v Speaker 2>in front of a camera with all the mics and

0:43:03.474 --> 0:43:05.514
<v Speaker 2>all the all of the media in front of him

0:43:05.514 --> 0:43:08.033
<v Speaker 2>when he says this, and I have let my family down,

0:43:08.034 --> 0:43:10.674
<v Speaker 2>and I apologize for my actions which have hurt those

0:43:10.714 --> 0:43:13.873
<v Speaker 2>closest to me. I accept that this is a consequence

0:43:13.914 --> 0:43:16.114
<v Speaker 2>of my actions, and I need to rebuild the trust

0:43:16.194 --> 0:43:18.634
<v Speaker 2>with Jules, who is in Perth and nowhere near him.

0:43:19.194 --> 0:43:19.794
<v Speaker 3>Are you with me?

0:43:20.154 --> 0:43:21.393
<v Speaker 4>I am so with you?

0:43:21.434 --> 0:43:21.794
<v Speaker 5>Okay.

0:43:22.394 --> 0:43:25.554
<v Speaker 2>Ever since juwles Neil, everybody's looking at her right, So

0:43:25.594 --> 0:43:27.634
<v Speaker 2>this story is all over the Daily Mail and news

0:43:27.634 --> 0:43:30.834
<v Speaker 2>dot Com and all over Instagram and everywhere, and everyone's

0:43:30.834 --> 0:43:32.434
<v Speaker 2>looking at juwles Neil to go what's she going to

0:43:32.474 --> 0:43:34.953
<v Speaker 2>say next? And she's been giving a bit of a

0:43:34.994 --> 0:43:38.194
<v Speaker 2>masterclass in refusing to play the wronged wife. Really, she's

0:43:38.194 --> 0:43:41.874
<v Speaker 2>been like tiktoking vision boards of nights with the girls

0:43:42.314 --> 0:43:46.114
<v Speaker 2>sipping wine with like Olivia Dean songs playing in the background, with.

0:43:46.154 --> 0:43:47.634
<v Speaker 5>A really great shaguitary board.

0:43:47.794 --> 0:43:50.794
<v Speaker 2>Yes, Taylor swift song's playing in the background, and then

0:43:50.834 --> 0:43:53.553
<v Speaker 2>she signed with a talent agency. There have been think

0:43:53.634 --> 0:43:56.234
<v Speaker 2>pieces about how she's rejecting the shame of a public

0:43:56.314 --> 0:43:59.274
<v Speaker 2>cheating scandal, and then also people saying she shouldn't have

0:43:59.314 --> 0:44:01.754
<v Speaker 2>gone public at all because somebody think of the children.

0:44:02.074 --> 0:44:05.034
<v Speaker 2>And then this morning the Daily Mail carries this story,

0:44:05.154 --> 0:44:07.074
<v Speaker 2>which is also on the front page of The Age,

0:44:07.154 --> 0:44:11.634
<v Speaker 2>inexplicably on every morning TV news bulletin, which sounds a

0:44:11.634 --> 0:44:13.834
<v Speaker 2>bit like it's out of Bridgington, which is the former

0:44:13.874 --> 0:44:17.034
<v Speaker 2>wag stepped out at the Australian Open in Melbourne on Tuesday,

0:44:17.394 --> 0:44:20.074
<v Speaker 2>making her society debut as a single woman.

0:44:20.234 --> 0:44:23.074
<v Speaker 1>Stepped out is the greatest. We need to do more

0:44:23.114 --> 0:44:23.834
<v Speaker 1>stepping out.

0:44:23.994 --> 0:44:25.834
<v Speaker 4>I know I never stepped out.

0:44:26.514 --> 0:44:28.874
<v Speaker 2>Now, I know that Jules Neil is a real person

0:44:28.914 --> 0:44:32.354
<v Speaker 2>and she is building her career back up. I know

0:44:32.474 --> 0:44:35.194
<v Speaker 2>that these people aren't normal though in terms of the

0:44:35.234 --> 0:44:39.074
<v Speaker 2>amount of attention that's on this, the level of public

0:44:39.114 --> 0:44:41.434
<v Speaker 2>interest isn't normal. But what I can tell you is

0:44:41.474 --> 0:44:44.274
<v Speaker 2>that when any big split happens in a friend group

0:44:44.394 --> 0:44:47.154
<v Speaker 2>or a community, it does come with a lot of

0:44:47.154 --> 0:44:49.794
<v Speaker 2>public opinion. The mom's at the schoolgate or the parents

0:44:49.834 --> 0:44:51.954
<v Speaker 2>at Schoolgate. Let's not be sexist about it. We'll be

0:44:51.994 --> 0:44:53.473
<v Speaker 2>playing the role of the Daily Mail here.

0:44:53.634 --> 0:44:57.433
<v Speaker 3>They'll all be like, poor you, oh dear, did that

0:44:57.554 --> 0:44:59.714
<v Speaker 3>really happen? Or did you hear about that?

0:45:00.034 --> 0:45:02.433
<v Speaker 2>Or they'll be talking about it. She must have known

0:45:02.474 --> 0:45:04.674
<v Speaker 2>something was going on. How could she not? Like a

0:45:04.714 --> 0:45:09.234
<v Speaker 2>million opinions and the score woman is usually portrayed as

0:45:09.274 --> 0:45:10.754
<v Speaker 2>something as a shameful figure.

0:45:12.234 --> 0:45:13.953
<v Speaker 3>Are we seeing the end of that?

0:45:14.154 --> 0:45:16.514
<v Speaker 2>With the Lily Allen's of it, but also of this

0:45:16.674 --> 0:45:20.234
<v Speaker 2>very Australian example where Jules Neil is looking a million

0:45:20.354 --> 0:45:23.714
<v Speaker 2>and twenty bucks at the Australian Open, sip in her champagne,

0:45:23.754 --> 0:45:26.594
<v Speaker 2>going this is me, screw you all.

0:45:26.954 --> 0:45:31.514
<v Speaker 4>It's like the Schoolgate example is oh, she must be

0:45:31.594 --> 0:45:35.234
<v Speaker 4>so embarrassed, like there's a sense that the embarrassment lies

0:45:35.234 --> 0:45:37.594
<v Speaker 4>with you. And what I love about this narrative and

0:45:37.594 --> 0:45:39.913
<v Speaker 4>how she's handled it is that there's no trace of

0:45:39.914 --> 0:45:42.594
<v Speaker 4>her feeling embarrassed. And in fact, when she got a

0:45:42.634 --> 0:45:46.194
<v Speaker 4>whiff of that, she jumped out and went, hang on,

0:45:46.234 --> 0:45:48.953
<v Speaker 4>I'm not going to let you all speculate about what

0:45:49.034 --> 0:45:52.394
<v Speaker 4>I am and am not working through. I've done nothing wrong,

0:45:52.834 --> 0:45:57.554
<v Speaker 4>which by all accounts she hasn't and she didn't go

0:45:57.714 --> 0:46:00.754
<v Speaker 4>into an enormous amount of detail, but she did enough

0:46:00.794 --> 0:46:04.114
<v Speaker 4>to kind of go I'm in Perth looking after my kids.

0:46:04.674 --> 0:46:07.513
<v Speaker 4>And then for her to reclaim that narrative of a bit,

0:46:07.674 --> 0:46:10.553
<v Speaker 4>I think she has been listening to Lily Allen.

0:46:12.754 --> 0:46:15.913
<v Speaker 1>There's a difference with Lily Allen because Lily Allen goes

0:46:15.954 --> 0:46:20.114
<v Speaker 1>into minute details on how she is wronged. What I

0:46:20.234 --> 0:46:26.234
<v Speaker 1>find so graceful about what Jules has done is she

0:46:26.394 --> 0:46:29.834
<v Speaker 1>told us where she was at. She didn't know allegations

0:46:29.954 --> 0:46:33.194
<v Speaker 1>or disclose what anyone else had done or hadn't done.

0:46:33.274 --> 0:46:34.873
<v Speaker 5>She tells us what she's up to.

0:46:35.434 --> 0:46:37.794
<v Speaker 2>And to be clear, she would probably be offered quite

0:46:37.834 --> 0:46:39.873
<v Speaker 2>a lot of money to do that. This kind of

0:46:39.954 --> 0:46:42.994
<v Speaker 2>consumed everybody for a period over that quiet news time,

0:46:43.474 --> 0:46:46.434
<v Speaker 2>and there would be tabloids and there would be tabloid

0:46:46.514 --> 0:46:49.034
<v Speaker 2>news shows. Who would be like Jules Neil Tellell And

0:46:49.114 --> 0:46:51.314
<v Speaker 2>so far she's obviously chosen not to do.

0:46:51.194 --> 0:46:54.634
<v Speaker 4>That, but I can't understand the pool though. There were

0:46:54.674 --> 0:46:57.354
<v Speaker 4>reports as well that she did comment on her former

0:46:57.394 --> 0:47:00.394
<v Speaker 4>friends Instagram basically being like, remove these images.

0:47:00.634 --> 0:47:01.594
<v Speaker 3>You're embarrassing your.

0:47:01.714 --> 0:47:02.954
<v Speaker 4>You're embarrassing yourself.

0:47:03.434 --> 0:47:04.754
<v Speaker 5>So, and I deleted it.

0:47:05.074 --> 0:47:09.194
<v Speaker 4>Yes, then deleted it, which I've found incredibly relatable. And

0:47:09.434 --> 0:47:12.513
<v Speaker 4>I think that when you're in moments like this, you're

0:47:12.634 --> 0:47:16.953
<v Speaker 4>so up and down, like sometimes you're full of adrenaline

0:47:16.994 --> 0:47:19.234
<v Speaker 4>and you're angry and you want to respond and you

0:47:19.314 --> 0:47:21.953
<v Speaker 4>want to put it all out there. But I think

0:47:21.994 --> 0:47:25.314
<v Speaker 4>so far she's shown kind of a lot of restraint,

0:47:25.634 --> 0:47:29.194
<v Speaker 4>and I love the idea that she gets to own this.

0:47:29.354 --> 0:47:33.074
<v Speaker 4>She has a talent agency thing. She's just like, you

0:47:33.114 --> 0:47:35.194
<v Speaker 4>don't get to shame me. I'm going to go to

0:47:35.234 --> 0:47:37.433
<v Speaker 4>the Australian Open with a drink in my hand and

0:47:37.474 --> 0:47:40.634
<v Speaker 4>pose on this media wall and I've got nothing to

0:47:40.674 --> 0:47:41.314
<v Speaker 4>be embarrassed by.

0:47:41.354 --> 0:47:43.754
<v Speaker 1>And I think that's what the vibe shift is. I

0:47:43.754 --> 0:47:46.274
<v Speaker 1>think you've really nailed it there by saying that it's

0:47:46.314 --> 0:47:51.274
<v Speaker 1>about taking away the shame and embarrassment factor, because the

0:47:51.314 --> 0:47:53.954
<v Speaker 1>woman in this case has not done anything.

0:47:53.874 --> 0:47:56.634
<v Speaker 4>Whereas it sounds like it's sitting on his shoulder. It's

0:47:56.634 --> 0:48:00.674
<v Speaker 4>like even that press conference, like he ought to be

0:48:01.394 --> 0:48:03.114
<v Speaker 4>mortified by what he's done.

0:48:03.194 --> 0:48:05.634
<v Speaker 2>I mean, there's another question there about whether you have

0:48:05.714 --> 0:48:09.874
<v Speaker 2>to quit your job. She's done something you know terrible.

0:48:09.954 --> 0:48:13.234
<v Speaker 2>Is maybe an overstatement, but it's not criminal, but something

0:48:13.834 --> 0:48:17.714
<v Speaker 2>you know bad, Yeah, in your private life. That's like

0:48:17.794 --> 0:48:20.514
<v Speaker 2>almost another conversation. I mean, who knows where he'll end up,

0:48:20.514 --> 0:48:22.114
<v Speaker 2>whether he'll end up going back to playing Perth and

0:48:22.114 --> 0:48:25.953
<v Speaker 2>all those things. But I wonder also if maybe the

0:48:26.074 --> 0:48:29.953
<v Speaker 2>narrative of a woman's life being entirely ruined by a

0:48:30.034 --> 0:48:34.354
<v Speaker 2>man's actions or choices maybe one of the reasons why

0:48:34.434 --> 0:48:36.834
<v Speaker 2>the vibe shift is there, because does that have to

0:48:36.914 --> 0:48:37.434
<v Speaker 2>be true?

0:48:37.874 --> 0:48:41.074
<v Speaker 1>And increasingly it's not, as women are able to build

0:48:41.114 --> 0:48:43.474
<v Speaker 1>their own lives separate from their partner. There was a

0:48:43.514 --> 0:48:47.314
<v Speaker 1>substack recently by Lisa Dawson, who's a writer in her fifties,

0:48:47.354 --> 0:48:51.114
<v Speaker 1>talking about how the script on divorce has been flipped.

0:48:51.154 --> 0:48:53.234
<v Speaker 5>It's no longer an inevitable tragedy.

0:48:53.794 --> 0:48:55.754
<v Speaker 1>It was called if you leave me now, I'm going

0:48:55.754 --> 0:48:59.274
<v Speaker 1>to be absolutely fine, and she talks about her husband

0:48:59.354 --> 0:49:01.794
<v Speaker 1>basically seemingly out of the blue, telling her I'm not.

0:49:01.714 --> 0:49:02.634
<v Speaker 5>Happy in the marriage.

0:49:02.714 --> 0:49:05.194
<v Speaker 1>They're both in their mid fifties, him pretty much up

0:49:05.234 --> 0:49:08.514
<v Speaker 1>and leaving after that, and she tracks how she felt

0:49:08.634 --> 0:49:11.154
<v Speaker 1>on the first few days after he left, and it's

0:49:11.234 --> 0:49:15.434
<v Speaker 1>really surprising to her because on day one, yes, she's unhappy,

0:49:15.554 --> 0:49:18.473
<v Speaker 1>she's sobbing. Her twenty three year old daughter is comforting her.

0:49:19.074 --> 0:49:22.674
<v Speaker 1>On day two she's actually back to doing Instagram ads

0:49:22.754 --> 0:49:26.034
<v Speaker 1>that's part of her career. And then by day three

0:49:26.114 --> 0:49:30.154
<v Speaker 1>she describes actually feeling liberated, and she's also just very surprised.

0:49:30.194 --> 0:49:32.634
<v Speaker 1>This is not what she thought was going to happen,

0:49:33.274 --> 0:49:35.473
<v Speaker 1>and she tries to figure out why she's having this

0:49:35.554 --> 0:49:39.514
<v Speaker 1>really unexpected response, and she has this interesting theory. She

0:49:39.634 --> 0:49:43.473
<v Speaker 1>says that women in midlife experiencing divorce have actually been

0:49:43.514 --> 0:49:47.074
<v Speaker 1>on this upward trajectory to that point. They've been climbing

0:49:47.114 --> 0:49:49.913
<v Speaker 1>career ladders, they have been raising children. They have, by

0:49:49.954 --> 0:49:54.154
<v Speaker 1>her telling, often taken on more of that work than

0:49:54.474 --> 0:49:57.194
<v Speaker 1>the male partners in their lives. So they've been improving

0:49:57.194 --> 0:50:01.154
<v Speaker 1>themselves basically getting tough, as stronger, more organized, whereas she

0:50:01.274 --> 0:50:05.993
<v Speaker 1>says that for men in midlife, they're typically plateauing. They're

0:50:06.034 --> 0:50:08.834
<v Speaker 1>not doing that self improvement journey in the same way

0:50:08.834 --> 0:50:10.954
<v Speaker 1>as women are. What do you think about that theory?

0:50:11.274 --> 0:50:14.194
<v Speaker 2>I see that theory play out a lot around me.

0:50:14.794 --> 0:50:18.234
<v Speaker 2>It's interesting because it's very different life stage to the

0:50:18.354 --> 0:50:20.714
<v Speaker 2>Juels Neil story, but in a way it echoes itself,

0:50:20.754 --> 0:50:23.994
<v Speaker 2>because in both those cases it's kind of like I

0:50:24.194 --> 0:50:28.274
<v Speaker 2>can get on with things and my life can be fine,

0:50:28.354 --> 0:50:30.834
<v Speaker 2>whereas before there may have been more of a well,

0:50:30.834 --> 0:50:31.554
<v Speaker 2>it depends.

0:50:31.274 --> 0:50:33.794
<v Speaker 4>A bit what he decides to do, isn't it Also

0:50:33.874 --> 0:50:36.674
<v Speaker 4>isn't the common denominator in all of these stories, Lily Allen,

0:50:36.994 --> 0:50:40.314
<v Speaker 4>this one, and Jules Neil, they're all supporting themselves financially.

0:50:40.594 --> 0:50:45.194
<v Speaker 4>I think that it's like that's the part where you

0:50:45.234 --> 0:50:49.474
<v Speaker 4>can remove the feeling of feeling completely disposed by someone,

0:50:49.554 --> 0:50:52.593
<v Speaker 4>or feeling pathetic or feeling which none of those are true.

0:50:52.634 --> 0:50:56.234
<v Speaker 4>And there are so many women who do sacrifice career

0:50:56.314 --> 0:50:59.674
<v Speaker 4>to look after children and then if they are dumped tomorrow,

0:50:59.834 --> 0:51:01.274
<v Speaker 4>that's a very very different.

0:51:01.234 --> 0:51:03.634
<v Speaker 2>There's different also different life stage. Yeah, right, So if

0:51:03.714 --> 0:51:05.993
<v Speaker 2>Jules Neil's got tiny little kids, and I mean again,

0:51:06.034 --> 0:51:09.274
<v Speaker 2>they're not normal people and when it comes with normal incomes,

0:51:09.274 --> 0:51:11.553
<v Speaker 2>but if you're in the middle of that time little kids,

0:51:11.674 --> 0:51:14.634
<v Speaker 2>is very different to the place where the substack writer is,

0:51:14.674 --> 0:51:18.114
<v Speaker 2>where she's got grown up children and she has been

0:51:18.114 --> 0:51:21.634
<v Speaker 2>rebuilding her career. But I think that's very absolutely true,

0:51:21.754 --> 0:51:24.754
<v Speaker 2>is that the financial cost of divorce is enormous in

0:51:24.834 --> 0:51:27.914
<v Speaker 2>terms of lifestyle change in terms of all the decisions

0:51:27.914 --> 0:51:29.674
<v Speaker 2>that have to be made, in terms of what it

0:51:29.714 --> 0:51:33.074
<v Speaker 2>means for your future. That's why an enormous amount of

0:51:33.074 --> 0:51:36.234
<v Speaker 2>people don't do it, who may want to, is because

0:51:36.274 --> 0:51:39.913
<v Speaker 2>they're like, everything will shift, And that is absolutely true,

0:51:39.914 --> 0:51:41.873
<v Speaker 2>and it's not to minimize it in any way, but

0:51:42.034 --> 0:51:46.154
<v Speaker 2>when more and more and more women are financially independent.

0:51:46.074 --> 0:51:47.794
<v Speaker 3>It does shift that switch a bit.

0:51:47.914 --> 0:51:50.874
<v Speaker 2>It does move that needle and go, well, I could

0:51:51.234 --> 0:51:54.194
<v Speaker 2>I could support myself, I could move on, I could

0:51:54.274 --> 0:51:57.234
<v Speaker 2>do this, I could do that, and emotionally what I

0:51:57.394 --> 0:51:59.914
<v Speaker 2>liked in that sub stack. Anyone in long term relationship

0:51:59.914 --> 0:52:03.794
<v Speaker 2>knows how complicated they are, and it's very rarely you know,

0:52:03.874 --> 0:52:07.354
<v Speaker 2>he's bad, she's good, or she's bad like whatever, either

0:52:07.354 --> 0:52:10.594
<v Speaker 2>of these women are prepared to wear. The woman in

0:52:10.594 --> 0:52:13.874
<v Speaker 2>the subtext says, no, my marriage was good, we were happy,

0:52:13.914 --> 0:52:15.754
<v Speaker 2>we did talk about things, we did do this, we

0:52:15.834 --> 0:52:19.674
<v Speaker 2>did do that. He has chosen that he wants something else. Yes,

0:52:19.874 --> 0:52:22.714
<v Speaker 2>it doesn't necessarily mean that I did anything wrong.

0:52:22.834 --> 0:52:24.634
<v Speaker 4>I'm not going to wear that rejection for the rest

0:52:24.714 --> 0:52:25.914
<v Speaker 4>of my life.

0:52:25.674 --> 0:52:29.194
<v Speaker 1>Or readjust what I was perceiving reality to be. That's

0:52:29.194 --> 0:52:31.393
<v Speaker 1>a really key point she made. She's like, well, I

0:52:31.554 --> 0:52:33.634
<v Speaker 1>was happy, and I'm pretty sure he was happy too,

0:52:33.634 --> 0:52:35.274
<v Speaker 1>and I'm not going to erase all of that just

0:52:35.314 --> 0:52:36.913
<v Speaker 1>because he made a choice.

0:52:37.714 --> 0:52:39.994
<v Speaker 2>That is all we have time for on this Wednesday.

0:52:40.074 --> 0:52:42.074
<v Speaker 2>Thank you for being with us as always, and thank

0:52:42.154 --> 0:52:43.913
<v Speaker 2>you to our amazing team for helping us put the

0:52:43.914 --> 0:52:44.514
<v Speaker 2>show together.

0:52:44.714 --> 0:52:52.954
<v Speaker 4>Bye. Mom and Maya acknowledges the traditional owners of the

0:52:53.034 --> 0:52:55.234
<v Speaker 4>land on which we have recorded this podcast.