WEBVTT - Blake, Justin & The Taylor Swift Defence 0:00:10.622 --> 0:00:13.382 You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast. 0:00:13.822 --> 0:00:17.182 Mamma Mia acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters 0:00:17.222 --> 0:00:21.622 that this podcast is recorded on Jesse. The Outlouders only 0:00:21.662 --> 0:00:23.662 have one question for you, and that is, did you 0:00:23.701 --> 0:00:25.342 get your KFC on Mother's Day? 0:00:25.822 --> 0:00:29.622 Look? I did. The Outlouders know that I've been vying 0:00:29.742 --> 0:00:33.742 to be an official KFC ambassador for most of my life. 0:00:33.942 --> 0:00:37.702 But on the way home from my parents' place is 0:00:37.742 --> 0:00:40.141 a KFC and every time I go past it, I 0:00:40.182 --> 0:00:42.622 get myself a little treat. And because it was Mother's Day, 0:00:42.902 --> 0:00:44.822 I was like, I'm going to get myself a large 0:00:44.862 --> 0:00:47.902 hot ships and a little drink. And I got myself 0:00:47.942 --> 0:00:50.462 my KFC and it was a great way to celebrate myself. 0:00:50.582 --> 0:00:52.902 What you may notice about that story is that I 0:00:53.022 --> 0:00:56.942 purchased my OWNKFC, and I may have some feedback about that, 0:00:57.262 --> 0:00:59.942 but I loved the outlouders who messaged me and said, 0:01:00.022 --> 0:01:02.382 just letting you know I had KFC for Mother's Day. 0:01:02.422 --> 0:01:05.902 At first I thought perhaps an unusual pairing, and then 0:01:05.941 --> 0:01:08.382 they realized that it was actually perfect. 0:01:11.862 --> 0:01:14.702 Hello and welcome to Mama Mia. Out loud. What women 0:01:14.702 --> 0:01:17.262 are actually talking about on Monday The twelfth of May. 0:01:17.422 --> 0:01:19.182 I'm Holly Wainwright, I'm. 0:01:18.982 --> 0:01:21.102 Mea Friedman, and I'm Jesse Stevens. 0:01:21.222 --> 0:01:23.302 And if we sound a little bit different to you today, 0:01:23.342 --> 0:01:26.262 that's because we are all recording remotely. As many out 0:01:26.262 --> 0:01:28.222 louders know, we are on the road at the moment. 0:01:28.262 --> 0:01:30.582 We are in Brisbane and Sydney this week and there's 0:01:30.622 --> 0:01:32.782 a lot of stuff going on. So if we sound 0:01:32.822 --> 0:01:35.582 a little bit like we're not in studio, that's why. 0:01:35.862 --> 0:01:39.662 But on the show today it sounds like a simple question, 0:01:39.942 --> 0:01:43.022 but this year it feels like the opposite. Who is 0:01:43.142 --> 0:01:47.982 Mother's Day four? Also, one of the biggest millennial celebrities 0:01:47.982 --> 0:01:51.422 looks like he's been having a slow motion breakdown for years. 0:01:51.742 --> 0:01:54.382 After all we learned from Brittany, Should we be better 0:01:54.422 --> 0:01:58.542 at understanding what's going on with Justin Bieber? And is 0:01:58.582 --> 0:02:02.222 it okay to film at concerts? One of the coolest 0:02:02.222 --> 0:02:05.782 stars in the world says no, But first, Mia Friedman. 0:02:06.262 --> 0:02:10.022 In case you missed it, Weight Watchers has filed for bankruptcy. 0:02:10.462 --> 0:02:14.181 They filed for Chapter eleven bankruptcy in the US this 0:02:14.302 --> 0:02:16.742 month because they have a whole lot of debt. They've 0:02:16.781 --> 0:02:22.022 got like two and a half billion dollars Australian in debt. 0:02:22.262 --> 0:02:25.142 So what this means is it's a financial restructuring. It's 0:02:25.142 --> 0:02:28.022 not a liquidation. The company is going to continue operating 0:02:28.382 --> 0:02:31.381 and services are going to continue uninterrupted. They've got about 0:02:31.422 --> 0:02:34.902 three million members around the world, including in Australia, so 0:02:34.942 --> 0:02:38.582 don't panic if you are a weight Watches member. But 0:02:38.622 --> 0:02:41.982 the reason for this is that it's basically been swallowed 0:02:42.342 --> 0:02:45.901 by prescription weight loss drugs, things like a Zampik and 0:02:45.982 --> 0:02:50.582 Munjaro and Mungovi. You might remember that Oprah became a 0:02:50.982 --> 0:02:55.262 shareholder in weight Watches in exchange, I think for her endorsement. 0:02:55.822 --> 0:02:59.622 But then soon after that she said that she was 0:02:59.742 --> 0:03:03.302 on one of the golp one drugs, and I think 0:03:03.342 --> 0:03:07.302 that experience has obviously been really, really common. So they 0:03:07.542 --> 0:03:11.062 are planning to emerge from bankruptcy about forty days after 0:03:11.102 --> 0:03:15.422 they sort of restructure themselves more into a telehealth business 0:03:15.462 --> 0:03:19.942 and they will be offering prescription weight loss medications alongside 0:03:20.022 --> 0:03:21.222 their traditional programs. 0:03:21.262 --> 0:03:23.181 What do you think So that sounds like a kind 0:03:23.181 --> 0:03:26.902 of colab right. They're like, we can't necessarily compete anymore 0:03:27.102 --> 0:03:30.382 with this new technology, so we need to be part 0:03:30.422 --> 0:03:33.102 of that and that maybe they should have seen that 0:03:33.142 --> 0:03:34.062 coming a bit earlier. 0:03:34.702 --> 0:03:37.742 Yeah, every sort of weight loss company that I've seen 0:03:37.982 --> 0:03:41.862 adds for recently seems to have to acknowledge the elephant 0:03:41.902 --> 0:03:45.422 in the room, which is weight loss injections. But reading 0:03:45.462 --> 0:03:49.342 this story, it just highlighted for me how much our 0:03:49.502 --> 0:03:54.182 understanding of weight loss and dieting has evolved. I remember 0:03:54.182 --> 0:03:57.182 growing up and a lot of people's mums were doing 0:03:57.182 --> 0:03:59.382 weight watches and it was all about the point system 0:03:59.382 --> 0:04:01.302 and you could have that brownie and you could have 0:04:01.302 --> 0:04:04.262 that glass of wine, but then you might skip lunch. 0:04:04.502 --> 0:04:06.822 I'm sure that's not what Weight Watches was actually saying, 0:04:06.862 --> 0:04:10.182 but that's how some people were using that point system. 0:04:10.222 --> 0:04:14.022 And then, of course in twenty eighteen, I think Weight 0:04:14.022 --> 0:04:16.981 Watchers saw the writing on the wall and rebranded as 0:04:17.462 --> 0:04:20.902 ww because they knew that that term and even the 0:04:20.981 --> 0:04:26.342 explicit reference to weight didn't sit comfortably with women. We 0:04:26.741 --> 0:04:30.222 talk a fair bit about weight loss injections, but it's 0:04:30.301 --> 0:04:34.821 worth remembering that the success rate of diets is between 0:04:34.981 --> 0:04:38.501 one and five percent. Going on a diet did not 0:04:38.741 --> 0:04:41.782 work for people, and I do think that there is 0:04:41.821 --> 0:04:44.701 a place for companies, whether it's WWU or I've had 0:04:44.741 --> 0:04:47.382 a few other brands talk about it. Just because you're 0:04:47.381 --> 0:04:50.261 on weight loss injections doesn't mean that you're not interested 0:04:50.301 --> 0:04:52.421 in your health and making sure that you're eating the 0:04:52.462 --> 0:04:55.021 right foods and fueling your body. So I do think 0:04:55.022 --> 0:04:57.142 that there's a place for those two things to come 0:04:57.181 --> 0:04:59.582 together and to help people with health literacy. 0:04:59.821 --> 0:05:02.581 Yeah, because at their best, those kind of groups are 0:05:02.582 --> 0:05:06.181 basically support groups. Right, So it seems so outdated now, 0:05:06.222 --> 0:05:09.902 but the original weight watchers people had public ways supposed 0:05:09.941 --> 0:05:12.621 to be to hold you accountable and also to give 0:05:12.662 --> 0:05:14.782 you other people to talk to about your weight. And 0:05:14.821 --> 0:05:17.981 it's so funny, as you've said, Jesse, the culture shifted 0:05:18.022 --> 0:05:21.181 on this a while ago, because now it seems really 0:05:21.222 --> 0:05:23.702 strange that you would reward the person with the lowest 0:05:23.782 --> 0:05:26.101 number in the group and everybody'd be like, go Betty 0:05:26.142 --> 0:05:28.461 and all that kind of stuff. But on the other hand, 0:05:29.061 --> 0:05:31.942 when you are trying to change something as significant as 0:05:31.981 --> 0:05:34.261 how you eat or something about your health a body, 0:05:34.301 --> 0:05:37.502 it can be really lonely. It can genuinely be really lonely, 0:05:37.902 --> 0:05:40.702 especially if you feel a level of shame attached to it, 0:05:40.741 --> 0:05:44.062 which many women do. So the idea of having this 0:05:44.142 --> 0:05:48.142 sort of community I think still has a place, but yeah, 0:05:48.222 --> 0:05:50.741 it's every rule is having to be rewritten in the 0:05:50.782 --> 0:05:52.101 face of this new medicine. 0:05:52.142 --> 0:05:54.742 It also made me think about how weight watches or 0:05:54.861 --> 0:05:57.462 WW and I think that this is a nature of 0:05:57.541 --> 0:06:01.341 diets when you're doing something like this, or when someone 0:06:01.421 --> 0:06:03.741 is on a diet, it seems to only turn up 0:06:03.782 --> 0:06:07.181 the food noise. And what these injections appear to be 0:06:07.222 --> 0:06:08.662 doing and what a lot of people who take them 0:06:08.662 --> 0:06:10.902 say is that it turns it town. I think that's 0:06:10.981 --> 0:06:14.381 really interesting. It's like the more that we talk about 0:06:14.381 --> 0:06:16.781 it and obsess over everything that goes into our mouth, 0:06:17.222 --> 0:06:19.501 the worse the problem can become, or the more all 0:06:19.541 --> 0:06:22.861 consuming it can become. So it's it's a very interesting evolution. 0:06:23.342 --> 0:06:26.302 Wait watches local business here in Australia just confirming they 0:06:26.342 --> 0:06:28.421 say they're here to stay and they will continue to 0:06:28.462 --> 0:06:31.662 operate as usual. The Australian services will not be affected 0:06:31.861 --> 0:06:33.621 by the US restructuring process. 0:06:34.421 --> 0:06:37.582 In case you missed it, Taylor Swift has been subpoenaed 0:06:37.621 --> 0:06:40.262 in the Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni case. And does 0:06:40.301 --> 0:06:42.182 that mean that we will finally be able to read 0:06:42.222 --> 0:06:46.101 all of Taylor Swift's text messages. Well, here is what happened. 0:06:46.501 --> 0:06:48.582 Baldoni's lawyer, Brian Friedman. 0:06:48.741 --> 0:06:49.622 No relation. 0:06:51.381 --> 0:06:54.541 To get the gossip, the gossip that man would have. 0:06:54.741 --> 0:06:55.902 Oh my god, I think you're. 0:06:57.381 --> 0:06:57.902 Very much. 0:06:58.262 --> 0:07:01.181 I think there's a connection. I think it has the 0:07:01.262 --> 0:07:02.181 same interesting. 0:07:02.181 --> 0:07:03.861 It's bringing my name into disrepute. 0:07:05.061 --> 0:07:08.782 The subpoena was issued last week. Now reminder, a subpoena 0:07:08.902 --> 0:07:12.222 is a legal document issued by a court that compels 0:07:12.262 --> 0:07:15.902 a person to either attend a hearing or a trial. 0:07:16.422 --> 0:07:20.062 Maybe they have to give evidence or produce documents related 0:07:20.102 --> 0:07:24.222 to the case. A representative for Swift said the subpoena 0:07:24.422 --> 0:07:27.461 was purely to draw public interest and has nothing to 0:07:27.502 --> 0:07:30.462 do with focusing on the facts of the case. They added, 0:07:30.662 --> 0:07:34.021 Taylor Swift never set foot on the set of this movie. 0:07:34.142 --> 0:07:37.381 She was not involved in any casting or creative decisions. 0:07:37.502 --> 0:07:39.502 She did not score the film. She never saw an 0:07:39.622 --> 0:07:41.701 edit or made any notes on the film. She did 0:07:41.702 --> 0:07:44.422 not even see It Ends with Us until weeks after 0:07:44.462 --> 0:07:47.382 its public release, and was traveling around the globe during 0:07:47.422 --> 0:07:50.821 twenty twenty three and twenty twenty four, headlining the biggest 0:07:50.902 --> 0:07:55.062 tour in history. Now this is important because there is 0:07:55.102 --> 0:07:59.622 a theory floated by an anonymous emailer who contacted des 0:07:59.622 --> 0:08:03.782 Moi saying that the subpoena is being used strategically to 0:08:03.862 --> 0:08:07.982 basically expose Blake Lively as a liar. Now, remember Blake 0:08:08.022 --> 0:08:10.821 Lively when all those her Takes messages came out, she 0:08:11.062 --> 0:08:14.062 used Taylor Swift almost as a point of leverage in saying, 0:08:14.582 --> 0:08:16.942 I've got these dragons on my side. She used this 0:08:17.022 --> 0:08:20.502 Game of Thrones analogy, and she said that Ryan Reynolds 0:08:20.582 --> 0:08:26.021 and Taylor Swift help her creatively a lot. Basically, Baldoni's 0:08:26.262 --> 0:08:30.782 team say that she almost used Taylor Swift as a 0:08:30.902 --> 0:08:34.382 threat to suggest like, I've got all this power and 0:08:34.462 --> 0:08:36.462 I'm taking over this movie. I've got the backing of 0:08:36.462 --> 0:08:38.982 one of the most famous women in the world. And 0:08:39.022 --> 0:08:42.622 the theory goes that Baldoni's lawyers will argue that she 0:08:42.822 --> 0:08:45.542 used Taylor's name to take over the movie, when in fact, 0:08:45.622 --> 0:08:48.022 Taylor had nothing at all to do with the movie, 0:08:48.302 --> 0:08:51.582 and it basically paints Blake Lively as someone who doesn't 0:08:51.622 --> 0:08:54.062 tell the truth, which is what you want in a 0:08:54.102 --> 0:08:56.342 case like this. Maya what do you think? 0:08:56.822 --> 0:09:01.142 Ooh, shots fired by my girl Tree Payne. Tree Payne 0:09:01.222 --> 0:09:06.262 is the legendary publicist of Taylor Swift with the best 0:09:06.342 --> 0:09:09.902 name in the whole world. She's formidable and one of 0:09:09.902 --> 0:09:13.382 my Roman empires since this began. Is just how pissed 0:09:13.582 --> 0:09:16.982 Tree would be to have Taylor's name brought into this 0:09:17.142 --> 0:09:22.862 absolute shit fight between Justin Baldoni and Blake Lively. I 0:09:22.902 --> 0:09:27.582 think it's an interesting idea that this has been used 0:09:27.622 --> 0:09:31.582 to flush out Taylor in terms of they knew that 0:09:31.662 --> 0:09:34.782 by subpoena ing her, she would protest. There are a 0:09:34.822 --> 0:09:37.382 lot of people who've protested about being dragged into this 0:09:37.742 --> 0:09:41.462 and about being subpoened. Is Justin Baldoni trying to turn 0:09:41.502 --> 0:09:45.462 this into a media circus? Absolutely, But I think my 0:09:45.702 --> 0:09:49.502 understanding of this is that Blake would have probably said 0:09:50.022 --> 0:09:56.382 something to him dropping Taylor's name. He's then perceived that 0:09:56.782 --> 0:10:02.182 as her weaponizing Taylor, and so he's flipped it and said, well, 0:10:02.542 --> 0:10:06.582 game on, let's do this. And so what Taylor has done, 0:10:06.862 --> 0:10:09.782 or Tree has done on Taylor's behalf by distance seeing 0:10:09.822 --> 0:10:14.702 herself massively from Blake and from the movie is to 0:10:14.782 --> 0:10:18.222 basically say in a line that Taylor herself coined around 0:10:18.262 --> 0:10:20.702 the whole Kim Kardashi and Kane West thing is I 0:10:20.742 --> 0:10:23.062 wish to be removed from this narrative. I don't have 0:10:23.102 --> 0:10:24.862 a dog in this fight. This is not me. But 0:10:25.102 --> 0:10:27.262 by the same token, she went on to say in 0:10:27.302 --> 0:10:29.422 a later part of that statement that this is a 0:10:29.502 --> 0:10:33.102 case about sexual harassment and intimidating women, which is very 0:10:33.222 --> 0:10:36.462 much on black side. So she's not saying this is 0:10:36.502 --> 0:10:40.582 between two people, and allegedly she's drawing a line in 0:10:40.622 --> 0:10:43.542 the sound about where she stands and who she backs 0:10:43.582 --> 0:10:46.782 and what she thinks this case is about. But she's 0:10:46.862 --> 0:10:47.702 saying I'm out. 0:10:48.102 --> 0:10:50.382 Yeah, it's being read a lot as far as I 0:10:50.382 --> 0:10:53.022 can see, as Taylor distancing herself from Blake. But actually 0:10:53.022 --> 0:10:55.102 there's a way of reading it that's supportive, as you 0:10:55.182 --> 0:10:57.342 kind of point out me, which is that she's actually 0:10:57.382 --> 0:11:00.502 saying to Justin Baldoni, stop trying to bring me into this, 0:11:00.702 --> 0:11:02.141 like this has got nothing to do with me. I 0:11:02.142 --> 0:11:04.022 don't want to be part of it. I think the 0:11:04.102 --> 0:11:07.062 reporting which is everybody saying, oh, she's telling Blake to 0:11:07.062 --> 0:11:08.942 back off. If they're really good friends, if they've been 0:11:08.982 --> 0:11:11.862 really good friends for forever, then of course they would 0:11:11.942 --> 0:11:15.222 talk about work. Everybody does, And I think you could 0:11:15.222 --> 0:11:17.822 definitely read this as her just saying justin, don't try 0:11:17.862 --> 0:11:18.702 and drag me into it. 0:11:18.822 --> 0:11:21.142 So what do you think we'll get, because we're probably 0:11:21.142 --> 0:11:23.382 not going to get her text messages? Right, But do 0:11:23.422 --> 0:11:26.182 you see a world in which she's actually summoned to 0:11:26.262 --> 0:11:28.302 the trial or do you think that this is just 0:11:28.982 --> 0:11:31.142 a play in a game of chess to get a 0:11:31.142 --> 0:11:31.822 statement like this? 0:11:32.302 --> 0:11:34.902 So that's what the statement is designed to do. It's 0:11:34.942 --> 0:11:39.142 to basically flag this is an attention grab, this is 0:11:39.182 --> 0:11:43.182 a circus. Trying to involve Taylor is really a tactic 0:11:43.742 --> 0:11:46.622 and she's got nothing to add to this legal case. 0:11:47.102 --> 0:11:49.782 And so it's then up to the judge whether she 0:11:49.982 --> 0:11:54.822 is deposed or whether some documents are subpoened. You know, 0:11:54.942 --> 0:11:57.542 that's a call for the judge to make. It was 0:11:57.582 --> 0:12:01.702 Mother's Day in Australia yesterday and something I noticed is 0:12:01.742 --> 0:12:06.982 that things went a little bit berserk online and also 0:12:07.062 --> 0:12:09.742 on my phone. If you own a phone and you're 0:12:09.782 --> 0:12:12.022 on social media, and even if you're not, even if 0:12:12.062 --> 0:12:13.982 you just have a phone and you've got text messages, 0:12:14.822 --> 0:12:19.222 I noticed a real change this year in the amount 0:12:19.462 --> 0:12:22.982 of mental load that was required on Mother's Day. It 0:12:23.022 --> 0:12:25.302 all started as soon as I turned my phone on 0:12:25.622 --> 0:12:28.062 when I got a lot of messages in my group 0:12:28.102 --> 0:12:31.502 chats and from girlfriends and in family group chats, Happy 0:12:31.542 --> 0:12:34.502 Mother's Day to all the mothers, and lots of validation 0:12:34.622 --> 0:12:37.342 and acknowledgment of what a wonderful job we do, which 0:12:37.382 --> 0:12:40.102 seems lovely. But then I was like, oh God, do 0:12:40.182 --> 0:12:42.102 I have to reply to all these messages? Do I 0:12:42.102 --> 0:12:45.142 have to message all the mothers that I know? Which 0:12:45.222 --> 0:12:48.222 is a lot? And then I looked on social media, 0:12:48.342 --> 0:12:51.222 and it often is a frenzy on Mother's Day of 0:12:51.422 --> 0:12:55.262 women posting about their mothers, sometimes their mothers in law. 0:12:55.382 --> 0:12:59.022 Less that, but now I noticed this year a couple 0:12:59.062 --> 0:13:02.342 of different things. People were posting about themselves as mothers 0:13:02.382 --> 0:13:06.862 and thanking their children, and it just became, I don't know, 0:13:06.982 --> 0:13:10.102 it was like everybody had to do all this work 0:13:11.102 --> 0:13:15.102 to include everybody and make everybody felt included. Jesse Hoole, 0:13:15.222 --> 0:13:17.102 what was your experience yesterday? 0:13:17.662 --> 0:13:20.542 I think Mother's Day has become a very dangerous day. 0:13:20.662 --> 0:13:22.822 Dangerous is the word I would use to describe it. 0:13:23.222 --> 0:13:26.422 And it is dangerous because there is no card, there 0:13:26.462 --> 0:13:29.382 is no gift that could possibly capture the work and 0:13:29.422 --> 0:13:32.942 the sacrifice that goes into one of the most undervalued 0:13:33.022 --> 0:13:36.302 jobs that anyone ever does, and because there is so 0:13:36.582 --> 0:13:40.502 little external validation every other day of the year, I 0:13:40.582 --> 0:13:45.142 think that probably waking up on Mother's Day it feels 0:13:45.302 --> 0:13:48.062 like a trap for a lot of people, and I 0:13:48.102 --> 0:13:52.622 think that women are shouldering this burden. So I would 0:13:52.622 --> 0:13:56.182 be really interested in speaking to retail workers about who's 0:13:56.222 --> 0:13:59.262 buying the majority of Mother's Day gifts because I think 0:13:59.502 --> 0:14:03.302 daughters are acknowledging their mothers. I think the people that 0:14:03.342 --> 0:14:06.302 I got the most messages from were other mothers, as 0:14:06.342 --> 0:14:09.902 you say, Maya, saying you're doing a great job. I 0:14:09.942 --> 0:14:12.742 see you, I value what you do. And then I 0:14:12.782 --> 0:14:15.142 saw at one point I was scrolling through my Instagram 0:14:15.182 --> 0:14:18.462 feed and as you say, Mea, it was like all 0:14:18.502 --> 0:14:21.662 these mothers posting about being mothers, which I get, and 0:14:22.142 --> 0:14:24.582 I loved it, and I love seeing photos of people's families. 0:14:25.222 --> 0:14:30.102 But I thought, is this US posting because we, again 0:14:30.182 --> 0:14:33.022 we do not get any other external validation. Is this 0:14:33.182 --> 0:14:35.342 us saying I am here. I want to be seen. 0:14:35.462 --> 0:14:37.662 I want my work to be seen, and I do 0:14:37.782 --> 0:14:41.542 not feel like I am surrounded by people who see me. 0:14:41.782 --> 0:14:45.662 And Amy Girard, who's a author and radio host, posted 0:14:45.742 --> 0:14:47.622 late last night, just going glad. 0:14:47.422 --> 0:14:51.702 Mother's Days over. I did pull out a little violin 0:14:51.822 --> 0:14:56.662 for myself yesterday and rightly, so you know, I feel alive. 0:14:56.902 --> 0:15:01.262 I am very low maintenance. I really don't ask much. 0:15:02.182 --> 0:15:05.782 I don't expect gifts. I don't expect much on Mother's Day. 0:15:05.942 --> 0:15:10.342 But here's what I do expect. If you can't my load, 0:15:10.502 --> 0:15:12.622 like I mean, at the end of the day, washing 0:15:12.622 --> 0:15:16.502 still needs to get done. Kids still need to be fed. Now, 0:15:16.622 --> 0:15:20.062 if you can't lighten my load and do the washing 0:15:20.102 --> 0:15:22.342 for me, and I don't know, just help me to 0:15:22.382 --> 0:15:25.862 relax for the day, then at least be nice to me, 0:15:26.382 --> 0:15:26.662 you know. 0:15:27.222 --> 0:15:27.982 Just be nice to me. 0:15:28.262 --> 0:15:31.942 I think the saddest part is I must have gotten 0:15:32.182 --> 0:15:37.462 over two thousand replies to that story from other moms 0:15:37.502 --> 0:15:41.782 just saying feels like I've felt like a piece of 0:15:41.982 --> 0:15:46.222 today as well, Like it's one fucking day, guys, what 0:15:47.182 --> 0:15:47.902 fucking day. 0:15:48.462 --> 0:15:50.462 I think that there's a bit of an epidemic of that, 0:15:50.542 --> 0:15:51.262 if we're honest. 0:15:51.782 --> 0:15:55.342 My mother's Day, which was perfectly pleasant, is simplified by 0:15:55.342 --> 0:15:57.822 the fact that I don't have in laws here anymore 0:15:57.822 --> 0:16:00.462 with rens mom, is it with us anymore? My parents 0:16:00.502 --> 0:16:02.222 live on the other side of the world. And obviously 0:16:02.262 --> 0:16:06.182 those things are painful on Mother's Day, but they make 0:16:06.262 --> 0:16:10.302 it easier because it's only about me their house. Not 0:16:10.422 --> 0:16:12.662 that it was it was about sport and washing and 0:16:12.702 --> 0:16:15.662 all those things. But a shift that I noticed this 0:16:15.982 --> 0:16:19.382 year online was I saw more than one, in fact, 0:16:19.502 --> 0:16:25.422 many tiktoks and in sturreels from mothers saying older mothers 0:16:25.422 --> 0:16:28.582 of adult children step aside. This is not your day. 0:16:28.622 --> 0:16:30.462 It's personified by this little grab. 0:16:30.542 --> 0:16:30.742 You know. 0:16:30.822 --> 0:16:33.062 The one thing I will never understand on Mother's Day 0:16:33.582 --> 0:16:36.102 is grandmothers and mothers who only want to be celebrated. 0:16:36.102 --> 0:16:40.062 But they don't want to celebrate their daughter or their 0:16:40.462 --> 0:16:41.462 daughter in law. 0:16:41.342 --> 0:16:43.662 For giving them grandbabies, but they want to be celebrated 0:16:43.702 --> 0:16:45.102 as a mother and a grandmother. 0:16:45.542 --> 0:16:46.142 It's weird. 0:16:46.262 --> 0:16:49.222 It's weird behavior. I don't know any women who would 0:16:49.222 --> 0:16:52.462 be like that, but it's clearly a common feeling because 0:16:52.462 --> 0:16:54.822 I saw another post from someone saying if you have 0:16:54.902 --> 0:16:57.582 adult children and they have children, this day is no 0:16:57.662 --> 0:17:00.382 longer about you, step aside, and I was like, oh, 0:17:01.102 --> 0:17:03.462 I thought it was still about you, Mia. Isn't Mother's 0:17:03.542 --> 0:17:05.582 Day still about you as well as about the mother 0:17:05.662 --> 0:17:06.861 of your son's child. 0:17:07.101 --> 0:17:10.102 It's funny you say that, because this mother's more than 0:17:10.101 --> 0:17:13.222 any other. I felt the politics of it all in 0:17:13.262 --> 0:17:16.381 that I wanted to see my mother in law. I 0:17:16.422 --> 0:17:19.421 wanted to see my mother. Of course, I wanted to 0:17:19.462 --> 0:17:22.702 see all of my children. But then my eldest son, 0:17:22.982 --> 0:17:26.502 he also has a mother in law and I'm his mother, 0:17:26.621 --> 0:17:30.141 but then he's also got to be the avatar for 0:17:30.542 --> 0:17:33.821 his wife, who's a mother. And it's so funny because 0:17:33.821 --> 0:17:36.061 on the day before Mother's Day, my mother in law 0:17:36.101 --> 0:17:39.381 came over with flowers for me, and she always gets 0:17:39.422 --> 0:17:44.461 her daughter and daughters in law flowers. And then I 0:17:44.542 --> 0:17:49.182 suddenly thought, oh, I should get Jesse something from Luna. 0:17:49.542 --> 0:17:51.381 And so I was like, I need to go to 0:17:51.462 --> 0:17:53.982 office works and get a like a one of those frames, 0:17:54.022 --> 0:17:55.862 and then I've got to put all the photos in it. 0:17:56.222 --> 0:18:00.581 And then I was like, I'm too tired this idea 0:18:00.621 --> 0:18:04.142 of now we've got to celebrate our children and our 0:18:04.502 --> 0:18:08.022 daughters in law and sons in law for giving us grandback, 0:18:08.141 --> 0:18:10.422 Like can I just have a of tea and some 0:18:10.462 --> 0:18:12.901 toast in bed? Like what happened to that? Yeah? Have 0:18:13.101 --> 0:18:15.941 made card a little past a bracelet. That's all I want. 0:18:16.422 --> 0:18:19.622 That's exactly what I got, because life's got too complicated 0:18:19.702 --> 0:18:20.542 over your way now. 0:18:20.942 --> 0:18:23.502 I think when the pie starts to feel too small, 0:18:23.502 --> 0:18:25.942 women turn on each other because it's like, there isn't 0:18:26.061 --> 0:18:28.941 enough pie for you to be celebrated and me to 0:18:28.982 --> 0:18:32.942 be celebrated. And as the mother of a small child, 0:18:33.581 --> 0:18:37.542 she cannot yet say to me, mummy, you are doing 0:18:37.581 --> 0:18:39.542 the best job in the whole world. You are the 0:18:39.542 --> 0:18:41.621 best mum. I need my husband to be doing that. 0:18:42.101 --> 0:18:45.022 So I think that's part of the etiquette rule, is 0:18:45.061 --> 0:18:47.942 that if you have small kids, then someone in their 0:18:47.942 --> 0:18:50.421 lives needs to do it because their child is not 0:18:50.462 --> 0:18:52.702 going to do it for them. I was reading yesterday 0:18:52.742 --> 0:18:55.542 about the story of how Mother's Day started. Have you 0:18:55.542 --> 0:18:56.542 guys heard this story. 0:18:56.341 --> 0:18:59.141 Before from the gift card company? No? 0:18:59.141 --> 0:19:02.821 No, Colleen, you cynic. You're a cynic, Hollywayen right. 0:19:02.942 --> 0:19:03.061 No. 0:19:03.502 --> 0:19:06.022 It was started by a woman named Anna Jarvis who 0:19:06.061 --> 0:19:08.941 decided to mark the day after losing her mum. And 0:19:08.982 --> 0:19:10.982 this was at the beginning of the twentieth century. Her mom 0:19:11.022 --> 0:19:15.302 died the year before, and she decided that it was 0:19:15.341 --> 0:19:19.581 about celebrating the invisible work that mothers do in a 0:19:19.581 --> 0:19:23.662 specific type of love, and really it was about for her, 0:19:23.742 --> 0:19:25.902 it was about a mother that she'd lost, and then 0:19:25.982 --> 0:19:29.581 she became the fiercest campaigner in the world to make 0:19:29.661 --> 0:19:33.341 it stop. She hated Mother's Day. By the time of 0:19:33.341 --> 0:19:36.141 her death, she was just like, make it stop because 0:19:36.182 --> 0:19:40.821 she was revolted by how capitalism, yes commercialized, it became. 0:19:40.861 --> 0:19:44.821 She was like, don't you dare jump on this flower companies, 0:19:44.861 --> 0:19:46.621 That's not what this is about. It was meant to 0:19:46.661 --> 0:19:48.262 be about just seeing each other. So she was the 0:19:48.262 --> 0:19:49.661 biggest lobbyist for abolishing it. 0:19:49.782 --> 0:19:52.742 In the end, I do send messages to my single 0:19:52.782 --> 0:19:54.941 mom friends on Mother's Day because the ain't nobody bringing 0:19:54.942 --> 0:19:56.782 them a cup of tea in bed. But the biggest 0:19:56.782 --> 0:19:59.821 transition I noticed in my house is when your kids 0:19:59.861 --> 0:20:01.701 are little and lunar, isn't they yet? But you've got 0:20:01.742 --> 0:20:05.061 years ahead of this, as Mia just said, pastor bracelets, 0:20:05.262 --> 0:20:07.861 twenty five tiny scrappy cards that they were forced to 0:20:07.861 --> 0:20:10.742 make a primary school, and kindy lists of things at 0:20:10.821 --> 0:20:13.421 my mom and then there's always something embarrassing like drinks, 0:20:13.462 --> 0:20:15.782 wine in the kitchen or whatever it is that you 0:20:15.782 --> 0:20:17.941 get loads of that. But then, because now both my 0:20:18.022 --> 0:20:20.702 kids are in high school, crickets not of that, So 0:20:20.821 --> 0:20:23.542 I this is what I did. I told them before 0:20:23.581 --> 0:20:26.901 the day that I still wanted that shit. I was like, 0:20:26.942 --> 0:20:29.101 I know, you don't have to go and do it, 0:20:29.302 --> 0:20:32.621 and they did to a point. So needs expressed. 0:20:33.861 --> 0:20:36.141 Gifts art my love language. But I'm strict about cards 0:20:36.621 --> 0:20:39.582 and I expect them on my birthday and on Mother's Day. 0:20:39.661 --> 0:20:42.661 Except this year, I actually decided, do you know what, 0:20:43.101 --> 0:20:45.982 because I know that my kids just get exhausted, particularly 0:20:46.022 --> 0:20:48.782 my male kids, get exhausted with the idea of writing cards. 0:20:49.381 --> 0:20:51.141 So I was like, you know what, I'm fine, I 0:20:51.182 --> 0:20:52.542 don't need it this year. And I said that in 0:20:52.581 --> 0:20:55.982 the family group chat and then they all came up with, wait, 0:20:56.141 --> 0:20:58.982 this is a trap. Yeah, this is a trap. 0:20:59.621 --> 0:21:02.181 We've played this game before and it doesn't I was like, no. 0:21:02.022 --> 0:21:04.022