WEBVTT - We Have Some Complaints About Newborns

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<v Speaker 1>We acknowledged the traditional custodians of the land we're recording

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<v Speaker 1>on today.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know why we still are trying to dress

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<v Speaker 2>our children in cute clothes like they are not cute.

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<v Speaker 1>Stop trying to make cute apps, Stop.

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<v Speaker 2>Trying to make cute happen. It is a small, wrinkled

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<v Speaker 2>Dailien potato dressed in silly, little overpriced clothes that will

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<v Speaker 2>end up in landfill. Let's just wrap our children up

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<v Speaker 2>like fish and chips.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, Hello, and welcome back to Eat, Sleep, Shit, repeat

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<v Speaker 3>your unhinged podcast about the madness that is motherhood and

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<v Speaker 3>everything in between.

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<v Speaker 2>I am Kelly McCarran and I'm Kiri Cels.

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<v Speaker 1>In case you missed last week's episode, Kells having some

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<v Speaker 1>big feelings around land turning three.

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<v Speaker 2>I was basically using this pod as my therapy since

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<v Speaker 2>I quit actual therapy like a you ago. And it

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<v Speaker 2>turns out as always, I am not unique, nor is

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<v Speaker 2>my experience feeling out of sorts around your child's birthday

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<v Speaker 2>particularly common, especially for those who have just the one

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<v Speaker 2>or trauma around to their birth. So I really appreciate

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<v Speaker 2>the messages of solidarity and she is sharing their own

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<v Speaker 2>experiences because like with everything. It's so nice to know

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<v Speaker 2>when your feelings are more common than you thought. But

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<v Speaker 2>today are something a little bit lighter.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah for whom, Well for Kelly.

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<v Speaker 2>McCaw she's dreading listening to me prattle off this list.

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<v Speaker 2>If the title didn't give you the world's biggest hint,

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<v Speaker 2>today's episode is dedicated to having a good old complain

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<v Speaker 2>about newborns in celebration of key being full term.

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<v Speaker 1>Baby. Well, yeah, yeah, well, the baby.

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<v Speaker 2>Anytime after thirty six, thirty seven, your full term.

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<v Speaker 1>Exactly, exactly, Well, everything's ready to go.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, baby is ready.

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<v Speaker 1>So, if you're new here, because we have had a

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<v Speaker 1>few new listeners come in, welcome, Welcome. Every now and

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<v Speaker 1>then we like to have a little complaint sessh about things.

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<v Speaker 1>So last year had a good old fashioned complain about

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<v Speaker 1>our unhinched toddlers, and then later in the year the

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<v Speaker 1>joys loll of pregnancy. I assure you that, at nine

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<v Speaker 1>months pregnant, I could add a few things to that list.

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<v Speaker 1>I just welcomed heartburn into the beautiful, which has been

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<v Speaker 1>just so lovely. Anyway, we'll link those in the show notes.

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<v Speaker 1>If you fancy listening to them, you can, but hell,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't even want to ask you this question because

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<v Speaker 1>I'm scared. What have you got for me? Remind me

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<v Speaker 1>about how great newborns are? Can we start with a peak?

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely not? Newborn complaint number one?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh God, here we go.

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<v Speaker 2>Why do you exit the womb? So gross?

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<v Speaker 1>So gross?

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<v Speaker 2>There are so many fluids, They are like covered with stuff. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>they are wrinkled, they are red. They look like aliens.

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<v Speaker 2>Like why why do they come out like that?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah? I guess because they're in that big like sack

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<v Speaker 1>of soup, aren't they.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, it's just disgusting. And can we also acknowledge just

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<v Speaker 2>how funny it is the midwife cleaning a baby, like universally,

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<v Speaker 2>why are they so aggressive with the cleaning?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I know they are. I guess, so that's like

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<v Speaker 1>I've been there, done that, But I still find it.

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<v Speaker 2>Really like they rub they are rubbing, Like, yeah, if

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<v Speaker 2>you have never watched a birth video and you birth

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<v Speaker 2>a human, what a shock to see the midwife just

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<v Speaker 2>grab the baby and then just go to town on

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<v Speaker 2>it with a towel.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's very confronting to watch.

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<v Speaker 2>It's quite funny, I would say, like as once you've

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<v Speaker 2>done it, yeah, well, clearly they know what they're doing.

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<v Speaker 2>The baby is absolutely fine, but it's funny.

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<v Speaker 1>But then I'm like, why am I like walking around

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<v Speaker 1>on tiptoes like shielding my baby when the midwives are just.

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<v Speaker 2>Like, she'll be right. One of my friends gets really

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<v Speaker 2>upset when people share fresh from the womb photos, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>covered in blood from the sea section or covered without

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<v Speaker 2>white because yeah, yeah, the discharging stuff the vadge. She

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<v Speaker 2>will screenshot photos and send it to the group to

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<v Speaker 2>be like, this is discussing why is this person shared this.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, some people just have like a different tolerance level

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<v Speaker 1>to that kind of it.

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<v Speaker 2>I would rather see you it not with fluids on

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<v Speaker 2>it and cutere looking like they just.

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<v Speaker 1>Look so look cute in that stage. Yeah, because they've

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<v Speaker 1>just been squeezed out of a berth canal, You've woken

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<v Speaker 1>up from a deep sleep out the bloody sun.

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<v Speaker 2>They're shocked little faces. It doesn't offend me the way

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<v Speaker 2>it seems to offend her, But I do sometimes think, really,

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<v Speaker 2>is that the photo that you want to post to

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<v Speaker 2>like introduce your new little human to the world, covered

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<v Speaker 2>in gunk and looking so bad.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like either you're like a gunky mum or

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<v Speaker 1>you're just like a clean mum, as in like what

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<v Speaker 1>you want to share. It's definitely anesthetic.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, like it leans tocau. I wouldn't say you're very aesthetic,

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<v Speaker 2>but it's not like you would share a gunk photo.

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<v Speaker 1>No, but I had a caesar so they cleaned her up,

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<v Speaker 1>didn't that? Like? Yeah, if I had a done vaginally,

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<v Speaker 1>probably would have shared a gunky.

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<v Speaker 2>Pick Listen, we've got a VBAC coming through Lucy. Lucy

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<v Speaker 2>is the photographer there.

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<v Speaker 1>Just had to buy extra battery pack. We're also going

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<v Speaker 1>the polaroids. We're getting digital legs.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm so excited to see your vagina in HD.

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<v Speaker 1>Glory good right now, that child it feels like it's

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<v Speaker 1>living in HD. It's that large and in charge.

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<v Speaker 2>Newborn complaints Number two, Why is there scalp literally exposed

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<v Speaker 2>for like a year. You know, the fondinent thing or.

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<v Speaker 1>The hole in their head, Well you know why that is.

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<v Speaker 1>It's so that they can come out of the birth canal.

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<v Speaker 1>It's so great that the head can actually squish to

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<v Speaker 1>come out, because if it didn't have that hole, it'd

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<v Speaker 1>be a lot more painful for birth.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but like so it's totally fine that your brains

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<v Speaker 2>are totally exposed except for a tiny little skin flap

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<v Speaker 2>for a year.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it is really scary. I remember being very petrified

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<v Speaker 1>of this, Like don't.

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<v Speaker 2>Touch the head. Yeah no, and like sometimes if they're dehydrated,

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<v Speaker 2>which that I will say that that part is handy. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>you can tell they're dehydrated by their sunken Fonda.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, that's so true. I was listening to your story

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<v Speaker 1>yesterday when this chick but when realized see the heartbeat

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<v Speaker 1>through the brain and then it's literally just going bulbuluck.

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<v Speaker 1>I had did not have that with Rue. Why is

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<v Speaker 1>your brain exposed? It is gross and it is really scary.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, that's why you got dropped them on their head.

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<v Speaker 2>As soon as they grow their flap over, they can.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm not actually worried about it with this baby

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<v Speaker 1>because I always see little toddlers go for the soft

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<v Speaker 1>part of.

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<v Speaker 2>The hand because it looks inviting, especially if they can

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<v Speaker 2>see the bulb.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, is definitely going to push down on that. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't know. Is that why they're like, make sure the

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<v Speaker 1>baby has a hat.

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<v Speaker 2>No, because I don't think the hat's going to protect

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<v Speaker 2>the football bubble.

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<v Speaker 1>But I think it like covers it, so it's like lesson.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know, but every listen, I don't have it

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<v Speaker 1>baby hat and my heads get cold summer baby. I'm like,

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<v Speaker 1>I need this on my but it's.

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<v Speaker 2>So small that they get so cold. I didn't have

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<v Speaker 2>a hat for any in a summer baby or so.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't have one for That's what I was thinking.

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<v Speaker 2>Because they're so ugly that the hat is to make

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<v Speaker 2>them look like if you have a silly little hat on,

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<v Speaker 2>you look arguably cute.

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<v Speaker 1>You do you really do?

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<v Speaker 2>Well? That's saddled.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's definitely.

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<v Speaker 2>It is one hundred an aesthetic thing.

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<v Speaker 4>That hat has no other purpose other than cover the baby.

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<v Speaker 1>Actually, if you've seen that, TikTok, oh my god, I'll

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<v Speaker 1>have to try and find it. We can repost it.

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<v Speaker 1>But mom literally pushes the baby out. She's obviously been

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<v Speaker 1>in labor for ages, so the head is like a

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<v Speaker 1>very strange shape, and she goes, oh, put a hat

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<v Speaker 1>on that, Like.

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<v Speaker 2>Is it real? Is that her actual first reaction?

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, yes, sisters, And you see the baby's head and

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<v Speaker 1>you're like, I get it, I get it, I get it,

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<v Speaker 1>I get it. Hot is need I.

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<v Speaker 2>Love though, that she's Oh, I don't even want to

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<v Speaker 2>hold it. Can you just just we need a honestly

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<v Speaker 2>moms that can acknowledge that their child is so ugly

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<v Speaker 2>when they come out. You don't realize at the time, though.

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<v Speaker 2>I actually thought Lenny was so cute. Yeah, he was cute.

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<v Speaker 2>He was not insert photo.

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<v Speaker 1>U was always really cute. I can't was she?

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<v Speaker 2>I want to fresh from the womb photo?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I can show you one. She was freaking cute.

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<v Speaker 1>Like they like smiled on day two. That was pretty cute.

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<v Speaker 1>She was all and it was like, yeah smiling.

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<v Speaker 2>They're so gross, like they're so it'd be weird if

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<v Speaker 2>a newborn came out with teeth, but some.

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<v Speaker 1>Of them do. Yeah, they come out Hello, mother, Please

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<v Speaker 1>may I suckle on your teeth?

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<v Speaker 2>Except it won't be a suckle. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, Oh my god. Do you know that

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<v Speaker 1>I am like the colossrum's.

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<v Speaker 2>Leaguan because I'm talking about oh no, as like it's

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<v Speaker 2>just there and are milking yourself?

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm a little bit fascinated.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know, because I milk yourself.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Well, I can't do it until a certain stage

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<v Speaker 1>because it can induced labor. So my midwife was like,

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<v Speaker 1>don't do it until you need to. But anyway, I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, babe, do you want to see that's so gross?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I should share this, please share it.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, babe, do you want to see me

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<v Speaker 1>milk it myself and my teeth? And he was like,

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<v Speaker 1>go go on it. It's like wow, yeah, but this

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<v Speaker 1>happened with rude, didn't it. And I was like yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>but that was I could just God, this is right now. Look.

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<v Speaker 2>And also I felt like, you don't know what's I

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<v Speaker 2>started leaking milking so early on in my pregnancy and

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<v Speaker 2>it was just like it and my best friend would

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<v Speaker 2>be like, oh my god, you need to say that stuff.

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<v Speaker 2>It's liquid gold. So did you show him?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Was it thick?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah? It was like that golden He like proper costrum? Yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>you born.

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<v Speaker 2>Complaint number three yeap, excuse me, but why can you

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<v Speaker 2>not burp? In fact, why do you come out requiring

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<v Speaker 2>so much assistance with all wind related activity. They come

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<v Speaker 2>out and they need help with what is like arguably

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<v Speaker 2>just a basic human function.

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<v Speaker 1>It should just be something yet that you do involuntary, really.

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<v Speaker 2>Don't need someone to wind you. That seems very strange

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<v Speaker 2>and very unnecessary, and I'm not gonna lie.

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<v Speaker 1>I was like feeding Beck's new baby JUNI like with

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<v Speaker 1>a bottle, and then I felt like she was a

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<v Speaker 1>bit uncomfortable, and I was like looking at her, going,

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<v Speaker 1>there's something I need to do right now.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh you forgot.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't forget. It was just wasn't top of mind

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<v Speaker 1>to say. And then I said to Beck, do I

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<v Speaker 1>need to burp her?

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<v Speaker 2>And She's like yes, And sometimes it takes longer than

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<v Speaker 2>it took to do the feed. It just baffles my

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<v Speaker 2>mind that they are so capable of doing so many

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<v Speaker 2>annoying things like screeching it the top of their lungs,

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<v Speaker 2>but they just simply cannot pass gas.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I guess it's like that, like, oh, it's so

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<v Speaker 1>many throat that they can't like.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, it just like they we are such a useless mammal.

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<v Speaker 2>I would never ever forget that babies need to burp

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<v Speaker 2>or wind, because it was the bane of my existence.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes see, I wonder because I don't think I ever

0:11:24.000 --> 0:11:26.640
<v Speaker 1>had Like I think rue was pretty easily.

0:11:26.640 --> 0:11:30.960
<v Speaker 2>But it's pretty coloquy though, like and they're all the

0:11:31.120 --> 0:11:31.640
<v Speaker 2>colony and.

0:11:31.720 --> 0:11:35.480
<v Speaker 1>That bloody things shut down yeah, they've gone, and I'm like,

0:11:35.840 --> 0:11:37.880
<v Speaker 1>what do you mean? I don't know, but I like

0:11:37.920 --> 0:11:39.960
<v Speaker 1>put it up as a recommendation and someone messaged me

0:11:40.000 --> 0:11:41.880
<v Speaker 1>like hey DL they actually shut down, and I was like,

0:11:41.920 --> 0:11:43.200
<v Speaker 1>well there you go. I know nothing.

0:11:43.280 --> 0:11:44.360
<v Speaker 2>That's quite sad for them.

0:11:44.559 --> 0:11:47.680
<v Speaker 1>It is sad and sad for the parents. Well, thanksfully,

0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:47.920
<v Speaker 1>you know.

0:11:47.880 --> 0:11:49.880
<v Speaker 2>What Victorian government? Would you like to come and look

0:11:49.920 --> 0:11:50.880
<v Speaker 2>after my gassy child?

0:11:50.960 --> 0:12:00.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, exactly, thanks.

0:11:57.080 --> 0:11:59.160
<v Speaker 2>You Born Complaint number four this I feel like you

0:11:59.200 --> 0:12:02.360
<v Speaker 2>definitely have forgot They pool all day every day.

0:12:03.679 --> 0:12:06.800
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I have forgotten about the nappy situation. Like I

0:12:06.840 --> 0:12:08.800
<v Speaker 1>was like, do I need a nappy bin? I?

0:12:08.880 --> 0:12:10.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And I mean I've just never had one, but

0:12:11.000 --> 0:12:13.120
<v Speaker 2>I've never lived in a big enough house. But like

0:12:13.200 --> 0:12:17.360
<v Speaker 2>you go through an astronomical amount of nappies and you

0:12:17.600 --> 0:12:21.079
<v Speaker 2>assume it's an exaggeration. Like I remember people would be like, oh, yeah,

0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:23.160
<v Speaker 2>they poop like pretty much every time. They just go

0:12:23.200 --> 0:12:26.840
<v Speaker 2>to the toilet, like every feed, sometimes an extra one. Yeah,

0:12:26.880 --> 0:12:29.360
<v Speaker 2>and it's watery right, yeah, so it doesn't really smell

0:12:29.360 --> 0:12:32.360
<v Speaker 2>that bad, Like it's fine until they start solids. You

0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:35.200
<v Speaker 2>just forget and you always think it's an exaggeration. No,

0:12:35.280 --> 0:12:37.920
<v Speaker 2>It's never an exaggeration. The amount of nappies that people

0:12:37.960 --> 0:12:41.120
<v Speaker 2>go through in that first year of having a baby

0:12:41.320 --> 0:12:42.920
<v Speaker 2>is ridiculous.

0:12:43.240 --> 0:12:45.360
<v Speaker 1>I know, I do feel bad about the wastage, but

0:12:45.440 --> 0:12:46.839
<v Speaker 1>I could not do the washing.

0:12:47.120 --> 0:12:49.600
<v Speaker 2>My sister bought the good for the environment. Yeah, the

0:12:49.640 --> 0:12:52.400
<v Speaker 2>washabule ones. Yeah yeah, and no, these weren't even washington

0:12:52.480 --> 0:12:55.480
<v Speaker 2>they were they weren't cloth. They will wipe like you

0:12:55.559 --> 0:12:59.960
<v Speaker 2>just wipe them down with a disinfectant what like they're

0:13:00.160 --> 0:13:03.960
<v Speaker 2>plasticky on the inside. Anyway, she never used them, obviously.

0:13:04.240 --> 0:13:06.160
<v Speaker 2>I was like, that is being so ambitious. I think

0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:12.160
<v Speaker 2>it's fantastic if people do have so's.

0:13:10.480 --> 0:13:13.600
<v Speaker 1>Cloth nappy services, which I wasn't aware of. Whereas like

0:13:13.840 --> 0:13:16.480
<v Speaker 1>there's actually an organization that comes and all pick up

0:13:16.520 --> 0:13:19.280
<v Speaker 1>your cloth nappies to wash them. I feel like that's

0:13:19.320 --> 0:13:23.880
<v Speaker 1>a little bit more realistic than me washing shitty nappies

0:13:23.880 --> 0:13:26.080
<v Speaker 1>in my washing machine. I don't know, like just feel

0:13:26.120 --> 0:13:27.440
<v Speaker 1>that it's already lost the shit.

0:13:27.800 --> 0:13:30.120
<v Speaker 2>It's like a period panty. You don't wash the blood

0:13:30.160 --> 0:13:32.319
<v Speaker 2>in the washing machine. You rinse all the shit off.

0:13:32.559 --> 0:13:34.000
<v Speaker 1>I know, but do you reckon I'm going to rinse

0:13:34.040 --> 0:13:34.400
<v Speaker 1>it off.

0:13:34.840 --> 0:13:37.240
<v Speaker 2>Yes, you're not going to chuck it in your washing machine.

0:13:37.240 --> 0:13:39.040
<v Speaker 2>Then your washing machine is literally full of poo.

0:13:39.280 --> 0:13:40.880
<v Speaker 1>I would just chuck it them, yuck.

0:13:41.440 --> 0:13:43.680
<v Speaker 2>My mum used cloth nappies with all three of us.

0:13:43.760 --> 0:13:47.679
<v Speaker 2>Well they had to, That's why we were really trained.

0:13:47.960 --> 0:13:51.079
<v Speaker 1>Like so that's what my mom said, because I were like,

0:13:51.120 --> 0:13:53.679
<v Speaker 1>I'm over this, learned to pool in a potty.

0:13:53.559 --> 0:13:57.160
<v Speaker 2>Only really rich people had access to, like the proper

0:13:57.240 --> 0:14:00.359
<v Speaker 2>nappies so much better. We are really fucking with the environment.

0:14:00.280 --> 0:14:02.320
<v Speaker 1>I know. And I also just wonder, like I'm on

0:14:02.400 --> 0:14:04.760
<v Speaker 1>this re all like microplastics train of you.

0:14:05.640 --> 0:14:07.800
<v Speaker 2>It's freaking you get one of my goals for this year,

0:14:07.800 --> 0:14:09.959
<v Speaker 2>which you think is just so funny because I love

0:14:10.040 --> 0:14:10.480
<v Speaker 2>to shop.

0:14:11.720 --> 0:14:16.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, sorry, but I do wonder like the nappy situation,

0:14:16.679 --> 0:14:20.000
<v Speaker 1>like they're plastic that is hugging their genitalia.

0:14:20.080 --> 0:14:23.320
<v Speaker 2>I feel like that's too much of a world tinfoil

0:14:23.360 --> 0:14:25.360
<v Speaker 2>hat claim. I know, I.

0:14:26.920 --> 0:14:28.200
<v Speaker 1>This Instagram account with you.

0:14:28.280 --> 0:14:31.120
<v Speaker 2>It's freaking me if you turn into a tinfoiler.

0:14:34.160 --> 0:14:37.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm not going full tinfoil, but like I've got a

0:14:37.040 --> 0:14:39.800
<v Speaker 1>little I've got a little beret that I'm putting on, a.

0:14:39.920 --> 0:14:44.280
<v Speaker 2>Tinfoil beret that you just here in there that you're like.

0:14:44.560 --> 0:14:47.440
<v Speaker 1>But it was like saying, like tin food, I hate

0:14:47.480 --> 0:14:50.440
<v Speaker 1>so much like tin chickpeas. I eat so much tuna

0:14:50.480 --> 0:14:53.320
<v Speaker 1>all in tins, and it's like, fucking me.

0:14:53.520 --> 0:14:55.000
<v Speaker 2>I have had this argument.

0:14:55.040 --> 0:14:56.360
<v Speaker 1>Ten is plastic.

0:14:56.560 --> 0:15:00.640
<v Speaker 2>I have had this argument for years about peep that

0:15:00.760 --> 0:15:04.480
<v Speaker 2>eat tinned fish. I actually think the whole chick beea

0:15:04.520 --> 0:15:06.560
<v Speaker 2>thing doesn't bother me. Same with like baked beans or

0:15:06.600 --> 0:15:07.560
<v Speaker 2>tinned other things.

0:15:08.360 --> 0:15:11.280
<v Speaker 1>You're eating my tune or alone. Leave it alone. No,

0:15:11.480 --> 0:15:12.320
<v Speaker 1>don't talk about it.

0:15:12.400 --> 0:15:15.640
<v Speaker 2>That was an animal that was alive, Okay, and it

0:15:15.720 --> 0:15:16.600
<v Speaker 2>is now in a tin.

0:15:16.800 --> 0:15:22.480
<v Speaker 1>No, that is weird. I understand, I understand, but let

0:15:22.520 --> 0:15:22.920
<v Speaker 1>me have it.

0:15:23.360 --> 0:15:25.520
<v Speaker 2>Go for it. But I'm not still talking about any

0:15:25.520 --> 0:15:27.600
<v Speaker 2>tin foiling. I'm just talking about it's just disgusting.

0:15:27.720 --> 0:15:31.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, well, apparently there's plastic inside of tinned goods, like

0:15:31.520 --> 0:15:33.320
<v Speaker 1>the tin, and that is you know what.

0:15:33.280 --> 0:15:35.960
<v Speaker 2>That's going to give you cancer. That's what they're saying.

0:15:36.080 --> 0:15:40.960
<v Speaker 1>That's what they're saying. Okay, I have to share this

0:15:41.000 --> 0:15:43.400
<v Speaker 1>Instagram account you No, my friend shared it and then

0:15:43.400 --> 0:15:46.000
<v Speaker 1>I was like, why did I click on this? Because

0:15:46.000 --> 0:15:46.800
<v Speaker 1>my head's.

0:15:46.520 --> 0:15:49.800
<v Speaker 2>Justin Ashley's a little bit of a tin foiler about

0:15:49.880 --> 0:15:53.800
<v Speaker 2>like she's done all of this research and apparently when

0:15:54.360 --> 0:15:59.400
<v Speaker 2>pesticides first were invented, yeah, that's when like the rates

0:15:59.400 --> 0:16:00.320
<v Speaker 2>of cancer went.

0:16:00.520 --> 0:16:04.280
<v Speaker 1>Of course they did. Of course, I don't want to know.

0:16:04.600 --> 0:16:08.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm literally just bought like this thing from kmart that

0:16:08.480 --> 0:16:09.720
<v Speaker 1>you is it made a blessing.

0:16:13.480 --> 0:16:15.200
<v Speaker 2>It's made plastic.

0:16:16.800 --> 0:16:22.360
<v Speaker 1>My god, it's so contradictory. I bought this plastic and

0:16:22.600 --> 0:16:25.280
<v Speaker 1>clean the pesticides off my fruit and veg because it's

0:16:25.320 --> 0:16:27.440
<v Speaker 1>like you put it in and it's like two pieces

0:16:27.440 --> 0:16:29.000
<v Speaker 1>and then you lift it up like you soak it

0:16:29.000 --> 0:16:31.840
<v Speaker 1>in this like vegetable soaka to get all of the pastias.

0:16:31.440 --> 0:16:33.360
<v Speaker 2>I don't want to get because sometimes when I see

0:16:33.360 --> 0:16:36.120
<v Speaker 2>those videos on TikTok of even just like soaking your

0:16:36.120 --> 0:16:39.160
<v Speaker 2>fruit and veg for a couple of hours in the sink. Yes,

0:16:39.240 --> 0:16:43.119
<v Speaker 2>the stuff that comes off, give things.

0:16:43.160 --> 0:16:45.840
<v Speaker 1>Little rinse, Well that's yeah, that's what I do too.

0:16:45.920 --> 0:16:48.680
<v Speaker 1>Some people don't even wash this. Oh I find if

0:16:48.720 --> 0:16:50.600
<v Speaker 1>I get a salad and it's got some grit in it,

0:16:50.640 --> 0:16:52.920
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, yeah, I just paid twenty dollars for the

0:16:52.960 --> 0:16:54.520
<v Speaker 1>salad and you can give it a little rinse from

0:16:54.560 --> 0:16:55.360
<v Speaker 1>a little shit.

0:16:55.160 --> 0:16:57.720
<v Speaker 2>That is discussing my girlfriend Anna, also a friend of

0:16:57.760 --> 0:17:00.080
<v Speaker 2>the pod, She'll be like, oh a little bit, it

0:17:00.120 --> 0:17:02.520
<v Speaker 2>won't kill you. It's good for you, builds up your immune.

0:17:02.600 --> 0:17:05.320
<v Speaker 2>You know what, Anna, You're always sick, so don't think

0:17:05.320 --> 0:17:06.240
<v Speaker 2>it's doing a very good job.

0:17:06.280 --> 0:17:09.320
<v Speaker 1>Also, I had to remind myself that like ow thing

0:17:09.480 --> 0:17:11.280
<v Speaker 1>of like, oh, they did it back in the day,

0:17:11.320 --> 0:17:12.200
<v Speaker 1>and it's like yeah.

0:17:12.040 --> 0:17:15.440
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but it wasn't chemicals, it wasn't covered with pesticides

0:17:15.480 --> 0:17:17.040
<v Speaker 2>to kick anyway.

0:17:17.080 --> 0:17:18.520
<v Speaker 1>So yeah, I'm gonna use my.

0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:20.600
<v Speaker 2>Mormans to pump stuff up and make it so big.

0:17:20.760 --> 0:17:23.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to use my plastic thing to clean the

0:17:23.080 --> 0:17:25.680
<v Speaker 1>pesticide off my fruit and veg you know the other.

0:17:25.520 --> 0:17:27.640
<v Speaker 2>Thing, Yeah, go on beret.

0:17:29.440 --> 0:17:33.480
<v Speaker 1>Coffee cups. Like apparently, having one plastic coffee cup a day,

0:17:33.880 --> 0:17:38.879
<v Speaker 1>you ingest like two thy five hundred particles of like microplastics. Yuck.

0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:42.800
<v Speaker 1>I know, it's fucking disgusting. It's disgusting to think about.

0:17:42.920 --> 0:17:44.679
<v Speaker 1>They found it in sperm, they found it in our

0:17:44.800 --> 0:17:50.240
<v Speaker 1>like ovaries. Yeah, okay, maybe maybe I'm graduating from a beret.

0:17:52.920 --> 0:17:57.360
<v Speaker 2>Graduating from the beret to the fedora. No, that's when

0:17:57.359 --> 0:18:01.120
<v Speaker 2>you turn into like anti vaccine. I believe the top

0:18:01.160 --> 0:18:03.040
<v Speaker 2>pat is for the anti vaxes.

0:18:03.640 --> 0:18:06.960
<v Speaker 1>Fuck, but it's freaking me out. It's got little by

0:18:07.000 --> 0:18:11.160
<v Speaker 1>hat maybe yeah, yeah, look, it is freaking me out. Yuck.

0:18:11.480 --> 0:18:13.280
<v Speaker 2>I don't want to know any of that, I know.

0:18:13.440 --> 0:18:14.960
<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry I had to share it with you. I

0:18:15.000 --> 0:18:16.800
<v Speaker 1>did this still Lucy the other day. I was like,

0:18:17.800 --> 0:18:19.920
<v Speaker 1>how to tell you all this line? She's like, what

0:18:19.960 --> 0:18:20.680
<v Speaker 1>do you mean?

0:18:21.119 --> 0:18:21.480
<v Speaker 2>Oh what?

0:18:23.400 --> 0:18:26.520
<v Speaker 1>I couldn't just keep this to myself. It's really stressing

0:18:26.560 --> 0:18:28.960
<v Speaker 1>me out. You need to be stressed too, and so

0:18:29.119 --> 0:18:29.440
<v Speaker 1>do you.

0:18:31.000 --> 0:18:33.919
<v Speaker 2>Gosh, I'm still stressed about the Buy Now documentary that

0:18:34.040 --> 0:18:37.399
<v Speaker 2>made me want to stop purchasing from Amazon Prime. Except

0:18:37.400 --> 0:18:39.680
<v Speaker 2>it's really handy that it turns up the next day.

0:18:39.800 --> 0:18:41.959
<v Speaker 1>I know. And also that you can send gifts. That's

0:18:42.000 --> 0:18:44.760
<v Speaker 1>my favorite thing about it all. Right, back to our

0:18:44.800 --> 0:18:48.399
<v Speaker 1>newborn after this, like that was a massive detail.

0:18:48.520 --> 0:18:53.640
<v Speaker 2>Conspiracy theory, the muta triangle, little segue, newborn complaint number five.

0:18:54.880 --> 0:18:57.640
<v Speaker 2>We just finished on the poothing. Yeah, except when they

0:18:57.680 --> 0:18:59.280
<v Speaker 2>are randomly constipated.

0:19:00.160 --> 0:19:02.520
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, you've got to give them a little tummy massages

0:19:02.640 --> 0:19:05.240
<v Speaker 4>and bicycle eggs and then when oh my god, you know,

0:19:05.240 --> 0:19:06.960
<v Speaker 4>when you do basket legs and you pull the legs

0:19:06.960 --> 0:19:08.399
<v Speaker 4>down then up, and they do a big and they go.

0:19:09.320 --> 0:19:12.359
<v Speaker 4>That was my favorite thing to do with through the

0:19:12.440 --> 0:19:15.520
<v Speaker 4>newborn has not shit for six fucking days, and they're

0:19:15.560 --> 0:19:18.160
<v Speaker 4>screaming at you because they now need assistance with not

0:19:18.200 --> 0:19:21.040
<v Speaker 4>only the passing of the gas, but passing off the poop.

0:19:21.400 --> 0:19:23.480
<v Speaker 4>And the next thing you know, you're tickling the entrance

0:19:23.520 --> 0:19:25.600
<v Speaker 4>of their noose with a coconut oil and a little

0:19:25.640 --> 0:19:28.280
<v Speaker 4>Q tip and you're wondering how the hell you ended

0:19:28.320 --> 0:19:28.840
<v Speaker 4>up here in.

0:19:28.800 --> 0:19:31.480
<v Speaker 2>Life coaxing some shit out of the tiny little human

0:19:31.480 --> 0:19:34.080
<v Speaker 2>that you made, who is incapable of doing anything.

0:19:34.119 --> 0:19:36.639
<v Speaker 1>Can you take me back to the Q tip fumbing

0:19:36.680 --> 0:19:38.480
<v Speaker 1>and noss with the I never did that.

0:19:39.119 --> 0:19:41.159
<v Speaker 2>Well, did you ever have a constipated human?

0:19:41.840 --> 0:19:44.240
<v Speaker 1>No, not enough for it for me to be trying

0:19:44.600 --> 0:19:47.840
<v Speaker 1>things with cue tips. I guess because coconut oil. Yeah,

0:19:47.840 --> 0:19:49.760
<v Speaker 1>because you can get those like bullet coffees right with

0:19:49.840 --> 0:19:51.720
<v Speaker 1>the coconut oil, and and it makes you do poose.

0:19:52.160 --> 0:19:53.640
<v Speaker 1>So I'm guessing that's the same time.

0:19:53.680 --> 0:19:56.840
<v Speaker 2>I can't remember where it came from. Well, I can

0:19:56.960 --> 0:19:59.280
<v Speaker 2>actually let me take you back about five years.

0:19:59.560 --> 0:20:03.400
<v Speaker 1>Ye are you getting this? Am I passing my bereat you're.

0:20:03.240 --> 0:20:05.399
<v Speaker 2>Passing a break. This is a do not try this

0:20:05.440 --> 0:20:09.000
<v Speaker 2>at home, kids, I mean, do whatever you want. Yeah,

0:20:09.119 --> 0:20:10.439
<v Speaker 2>the things that I did to try to get my

0:20:10.520 --> 0:20:13.920
<v Speaker 2>kid to poop. So about five years ago, peak COVID

0:20:14.480 --> 0:20:18.080
<v Speaker 2>me two of my friends, one of them had a newborn.

0:20:18.359 --> 0:20:19.919
<v Speaker 2>We were in like you know when you could hang

0:20:19.960 --> 0:20:20.880
<v Speaker 2>out with just a few people.

0:20:21.000 --> 0:20:22.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, yeah, your bubble or whatever.

0:20:22.880 --> 0:20:25.119
<v Speaker 2>So we all lived close together and we would just

0:20:25.200 --> 0:20:29.880
<v Speaker 2>have these absolutely cooked nights where we would we would

0:20:29.920 --> 0:20:33.119
<v Speaker 2>smash like two bottles of wine each a drunkness, and

0:20:33.160 --> 0:20:35.280
<v Speaker 2>there was a newborn there as part of the party.

0:20:35.480 --> 0:20:38.080
<v Speaker 2>But it was a very easy newborn, except at one

0:20:38.080 --> 0:20:40.439
<v Speaker 2>point she was so constipated. I'm not going to name

0:20:40.560 --> 0:20:42.399
<v Speaker 2>names because it would be throwing a couple of my

0:20:42.400 --> 0:20:44.160
<v Speaker 2>friends under the bus with what we did. One night.

0:20:44.840 --> 0:20:47.200
<v Speaker 2>So one night, the start of the evening, we really

0:20:47.200 --> 0:20:49.280
<v Speaker 2>wanted the baby to poop so she'd be more comfortable,

0:20:49.320 --> 0:20:52.280
<v Speaker 2>so we could really sink into the bottles. Yeah, and

0:20:52.359 --> 0:20:55.239
<v Speaker 2>my friend is like my mum knew were midwife and

0:20:55.280 --> 0:20:58.760
<v Speaker 2>said to like tickle the entrance of the anus with

0:20:58.800 --> 0:21:01.480
<v Speaker 2>a bit of oil on the queue tip. So then

0:21:01.520 --> 0:21:04.040
<v Speaker 2>we're all crowded around this poor baby with a Q

0:21:04.240 --> 0:21:06.440
<v Speaker 2>tip covered. We just thought coconut ale would be the

0:21:06.520 --> 0:21:09.800
<v Speaker 2>best because, like you know, I can see health. You know.

0:21:09.800 --> 0:21:14.119
<v Speaker 2>We didn't want to hurt the baby, obviously, obviously, So

0:21:14.160 --> 0:21:17.240
<v Speaker 2>we're tickling the entrance of the anus with the coconut

0:21:17.320 --> 0:21:18.720
<v Speaker 2>oil to try to get things moving.

0:21:19.119 --> 0:21:19.840
<v Speaker 1>And did it work.

0:21:19.960 --> 0:21:21.320
<v Speaker 2>I'm not going to say if it did not, because

0:21:21.320 --> 0:21:23.000
<v Speaker 2>I don't want anyone to try this at home, because

0:21:23.000 --> 0:21:24.879
<v Speaker 2>you're not supposed to put c tips in any baby,

0:21:24.960 --> 0:21:28.000
<v Speaker 2>in any orifice of well, you were't putting it in, No,

0:21:28.080 --> 0:21:31.359
<v Speaker 2>we were tickling the entrance. Did I then do the

0:21:31.359 --> 0:21:32.560
<v Speaker 2>same thing to my child?

0:21:33.000 --> 0:21:33.200
<v Speaker 1>Yes?

0:21:33.280 --> 0:21:35.760
<v Speaker 2>Yes, In fact, did I then buy things that probably

0:21:35.800 --> 0:21:40.360
<v Speaker 2>aren't TGA approved from Amazon called the d Windy by

0:21:40.400 --> 0:21:42.760
<v Speaker 2>the same brand that does the nose freed up?

0:21:43.440 --> 0:21:47.480
<v Speaker 1>Oh and you literally stick If they're selling it must

0:21:47.520 --> 0:21:48.000
<v Speaker 1>be legit.

0:21:48.560 --> 0:21:51.960
<v Speaker 2>Well, listen, it hasn't been recalled. I have to tell

0:21:52.000 --> 0:21:53.680
<v Speaker 2>you guys what it is because the fact that I

0:21:53.720 --> 0:21:57.040
<v Speaker 2>would be crowding around my child. Paul Lenny, Lenny, if

0:21:57.040 --> 0:21:58.720
<v Speaker 2>you're listening, I'm so sorry.

0:21:58.480 --> 0:21:59.920
<v Speaker 1>That I thought it was all the good.

0:22:00.160 --> 0:22:03.440
<v Speaker 2>The peak couldn't pooh as someone.

0:22:03.119 --> 0:22:07.240
<v Speaker 1>Who historically has had issues pulling. It is a more

0:22:07.280 --> 0:22:08.520
<v Speaker 1>serious thing than you can ever.

0:22:08.600 --> 0:22:11.439
<v Speaker 2>And honestly, I just need to show you a photo

0:22:11.480 --> 0:22:13.600
<v Speaker 2>of the I'm not going to say the name because

0:22:13.600 --> 0:22:15.800
<v Speaker 2>I don't want to be like on the record recommending them.

0:22:15.840 --> 0:22:18.320
<v Speaker 2>I just you need to describe.

0:22:18.480 --> 0:22:19.680
<v Speaker 1>What not a recommendation.

0:22:19.800 --> 0:22:21.199
<v Speaker 2>It's definitely not a recommendation.

0:22:23.760 --> 0:22:29.640
<v Speaker 1>Oh my word, would you like to describe what you're

0:22:29.680 --> 0:22:33.240
<v Speaker 1>looking at? I'm looking at a cartoon of a baby

0:22:33.320 --> 0:22:37.280
<v Speaker 1>sitting on its bum and looking back at its butt,

0:22:37.880 --> 0:22:40.679
<v Speaker 1>and then there's like a cloud, which I'm imagining is

0:22:40.760 --> 0:22:45.880
<v Speaker 1>the wind coming out. And then this it's a kind

0:22:45.920 --> 0:22:51.280
<v Speaker 1>of silic thing. It looks like something that I would

0:22:51.359 --> 0:22:54.320
<v Speaker 1>use to maybe pump up a tire, maybe.

0:22:54.080 --> 0:22:57.600
<v Speaker 2>Like a little okay, yeah great, but a tiny little

0:22:57.600 --> 0:22:58.240
<v Speaker 2>silicon thing.

0:22:58.400 --> 0:22:58.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:22:58.880 --> 0:23:01.440
<v Speaker 2>So the teat of the silicon thing, it goes.

0:23:01.200 --> 0:23:03.000
<v Speaker 1>In to the aos I'm imagining.

0:23:03.160 --> 0:23:07.520
<v Speaker 2>So yeah, and then you squeeze the rest of the

0:23:07.600 --> 0:23:10.840
<v Speaker 2>silicony thing and it kind of like, I guess helps

0:23:10.920 --> 0:23:11.720
<v Speaker 2>pull air out.

0:23:11.840 --> 0:23:12.359
<v Speaker 3>I don't know.

0:23:12.800 --> 0:23:15.600
<v Speaker 1>But also there's nothing in the silicon thing. It's no, no, no, no.

0:23:15.359 --> 0:23:20.280
<v Speaker 2>No, it's completely empty. Listen. Obviously they're approved. Did I

0:23:20.320 --> 0:23:23.600
<v Speaker 2>also do the q tippy thing and these little silicon

0:23:24.520 --> 0:23:25.680
<v Speaker 2>edms eds.

0:23:25.920 --> 0:23:27.760
<v Speaker 1>Well, no, it's not an animal because it's not doing anything.

0:23:27.760 --> 0:23:29.919
<v Speaker 1>It's literally just an air pump, so it's like a

0:23:29.960 --> 0:23:31.159
<v Speaker 1>reverse pump kind.

0:23:31.040 --> 0:23:32.560
<v Speaker 2>Of thing, kind of Yeah.

0:23:32.600 --> 0:23:34.879
<v Speaker 1>Wow, I don't think that would feel good.

0:23:35.080 --> 0:23:36.920
<v Speaker 2>You don't think that would feel good if it had

0:23:36.960 --> 0:23:39.879
<v Speaker 2>instant relief for you, if you could buy an adult version.

0:23:40.359 --> 0:23:43.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but yours wind? Oh this was for poo.

0:23:43.520 --> 0:23:47.200
<v Speaker 2>Well they market it for wind, but with wind comes pooh.

0:23:47.480 --> 0:23:50.840
<v Speaker 2>Oh okay, because generally, because babies is so gassy, what's

0:23:50.880 --> 0:23:53.640
<v Speaker 2>actually constipating them is potentially be gas bubbles.

0:23:53.720 --> 0:23:55.760
<v Speaker 1>You're so right, you're so right. Yeah.

0:23:55.880 --> 0:24:00.920
<v Speaker 2>Anyway, moving on newborn complaint number six. Yeah, hit me,

0:24:01.720 --> 0:24:02.919
<v Speaker 2>why are they possessed?

0:24:04.280 --> 0:24:06.959
<v Speaker 1>I don't I'm so scattered this one. I'm so scattered

0:24:07.000 --> 0:24:09.199
<v Speaker 1>as one. I just don't think that I can have

0:24:09.280 --> 0:24:11.359
<v Speaker 1>two good sleepers. I don't think it's fair.

0:24:11.640 --> 0:24:13.159
<v Speaker 2>Did I say anything about sleeping?

0:24:13.640 --> 0:24:15.199
<v Speaker 1>Oh? Possesseds? And what do you mean?

0:24:15.640 --> 0:24:19.199
<v Speaker 2>You know they do like those weird jolt things in

0:24:19.240 --> 0:24:24.000
<v Speaker 2>their sleep. Oh, like you look over, No, that's another point.

0:24:24.160 --> 0:24:26.480
<v Speaker 2>And then you look over and they've randomly just got

0:24:26.480 --> 0:24:28.360
<v Speaker 2>their legs in the air straight up.

0:24:29.400 --> 0:24:32.320
<v Speaker 1>I forgot about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, then it's a

0:24:32.320 --> 0:24:32.840
<v Speaker 1>weird shit.

0:24:33.280 --> 0:24:35.640
<v Speaker 2>Who is possessing your body right now? Why you sound

0:24:35.640 --> 0:24:39.000
<v Speaker 2>asleep with your legs completely piped in a pipe position

0:24:39.119 --> 0:24:44.480
<v Speaker 2>in the air. It's like, okay a but like, yeah, possessed. Also,

0:24:44.720 --> 0:24:48.000
<v Speaker 2>I guess the screaming for hours on end rude didn't

0:24:48.000 --> 0:24:49.240
<v Speaker 2>do that though, did she? No?

0:24:49.359 --> 0:24:50.960
<v Speaker 1>But I feel like you can't have two.

0:24:51.080 --> 0:24:53.480
<v Speaker 2>If you can, my girlfriend down the road has three,

0:24:53.920 --> 0:24:57.800
<v Speaker 2>you can. She got three angels. They still to this day,

0:24:58.240 --> 0:25:00.840
<v Speaker 2>all of them seven till seven and then the oldest

0:25:00.880 --> 0:25:03.120
<v Speaker 2>one gets out of bed and just plays with herself

0:25:03.119 --> 0:25:04.840
<v Speaker 2>in her room because mummy's not ready to get up

0:25:04.840 --> 0:25:05.520
<v Speaker 2>till seven thirty.

0:25:05.840 --> 0:25:08.800
<v Speaker 1>That is so good. So yes, you might, yeah, but

0:25:09.000 --> 0:25:10.879
<v Speaker 1>the thing is you can't bank on that, right, So

0:25:10.920 --> 0:25:13.200
<v Speaker 1>I'm preparing for the worst, hoping for the best.

0:25:13.440 --> 0:25:17.600
<v Speaker 2>So you're preparing for a Lenny, Yeah, hoping for even

0:25:17.640 --> 0:25:18.200
<v Speaker 2>better than Rue.

0:25:18.200 --> 0:25:20.880
<v Speaker 1>Because Rue wasn't well. She wasn't a walk in the park,

0:25:20.960 --> 0:25:22.680
<v Speaker 1>But it was because she was hungry.

0:25:23.440 --> 0:25:24.760
<v Speaker 2>She was a bit malnourished.

0:25:24.840 --> 0:25:27.680
<v Speaker 1>She was a little bit because she wasn't well fed. No,

0:25:27.880 --> 0:25:31.760
<v Speaker 1>the boobies weren't providing. But once I got done that formulas,

0:25:32.080 --> 0:25:32.960
<v Speaker 1>it was great.

0:25:37.440 --> 0:25:41.679
<v Speaker 2>Newborn complaint number seven, But where is your immune system? Please?

0:25:42.320 --> 0:25:45.560
<v Speaker 1>I know, and with the fricking toddler in the house,

0:25:45.640 --> 0:25:46.320
<v Speaker 1>I'm like not.

0:25:46.520 --> 0:25:47.960
<v Speaker 2>The other day when I went to visit my friends

0:25:48.000 --> 0:25:50.600
<v Speaker 2>with a newbornho todd that this cough sounded so creepy

0:25:50.920 --> 0:25:53.040
<v Speaker 2>and it was all over the newborn, and I was like, oh,

0:25:54.080 --> 0:25:57.560
<v Speaker 2>not only is the wrinkled alien born without an intact skull,

0:25:58.480 --> 0:26:02.119
<v Speaker 2>the ability to wind themselves or kneecaps. You always forget

0:26:02.160 --> 0:26:02.480
<v Speaker 2>that part.

0:26:02.520 --> 0:26:04.000
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, the knee caps.

0:26:04.080 --> 0:26:07.479
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, yeah, they also have absolutely no immune system.

0:26:08.000 --> 0:26:12.080
<v Speaker 2>We got landed with a dud. They are the dud species. Yeah,

0:26:12.160 --> 0:26:15.159
<v Speaker 2>because in any other species they would simply sniff the

0:26:15.280 --> 0:26:18.800
<v Speaker 2>useless young in horror and then race off like the

0:26:18.840 --> 0:26:22.439
<v Speaker 2>world would quickly become extinct because imagine a goat. A

0:26:22.520 --> 0:26:25.440
<v Speaker 2>goat would not have any of that. Oh you can't

0:26:25.480 --> 0:26:28.680
<v Speaker 2>like fight off a cold, Oh you can't gas yourself? Well,

0:26:28.680 --> 0:26:30.720
<v Speaker 2>see you later, see you later. I'm going you can't

0:26:30.760 --> 0:26:31.960
<v Speaker 2>walk get out of here.

0:26:32.040 --> 0:26:33.240
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so true.

0:26:34.080 --> 0:26:36.679
<v Speaker 2>It's so annoying. They catch everything, and because they're so

0:26:36.760 --> 0:26:39.359
<v Speaker 2>young and useless, everything makes them so bloody sick and

0:26:39.359 --> 0:26:42.320
<v Speaker 2>you end up visiting Dr Matt at PWO on the rig.

0:26:42.480 --> 0:26:43.080
<v Speaker 2>Shout out to.

0:26:43.080 --> 0:26:45.959
<v Speaker 1>Dr Matt, Shout out to doctor Matt. Hopefully he's still around.

0:26:46.200 --> 0:26:46.760
<v Speaker 1>We love him.

0:26:47.320 --> 0:26:50.440
<v Speaker 2>You might have to visit him. Yeah, I hope you don't.

0:26:50.520 --> 0:26:52.600
<v Speaker 2>I've got two newborns in my life at the moment.

0:26:52.720 --> 0:26:55.760
<v Speaker 2>One has not had to go to hospital. One has think.

0:26:55.560 --> 0:26:57.200
<v Speaker 1>About how much I had to take route to hospital,

0:26:57.240 --> 0:26:58.200
<v Speaker 1>and a first year Well.

0:26:58.119 --> 0:26:59.919
<v Speaker 2>Okay, maybe you got that all out of the system.

0:27:00.040 --> 0:27:01.359
<v Speaker 2>You don't have to take the new baby.

0:27:01.400 --> 0:27:03.320
<v Speaker 1>Oh god, I hope not. I mean, I have been

0:27:03.480 --> 0:27:06.720
<v Speaker 1>quite sick this pregnancy with all the daycare jones that

0:27:06.760 --> 0:27:10.119
<v Speaker 1>have come home, So I'm hoping that's like somewhat of

0:27:10.400 --> 0:27:14.880
<v Speaker 1>like the ambody. Yeah, going to the baby. Yeah, it's right.

0:27:14.880 --> 0:27:16.320
<v Speaker 2>I never to take Lynn to the hospital.

0:27:16.480 --> 0:27:17.920
<v Speaker 1>I honestly don't know how.

0:27:18.400 --> 0:27:22.160
<v Speaker 2>The one time I've ever taken him, they then sent

0:27:22.280 --> 0:27:24.359
<v Speaker 2>us home after like half an hour because they were like,

0:27:24.520 --> 0:27:26.399
<v Speaker 2>he's fine and he's going to get way sicker.

0:27:26.520 --> 0:27:26.760
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:27:27.040 --> 0:27:27.760
<v Speaker 2>The waiting, well that.

0:27:27.760 --> 0:27:29.600
<v Speaker 1>Was the thing. You'd be like, I really need to

0:27:29.640 --> 0:27:32.520
<v Speaker 1>take them, but we're going to walk out with COVID probably.

0:27:32.320 --> 0:27:34.520
<v Speaker 2>I think that you'll be actually way better this time

0:27:34.560 --> 0:27:36.720
<v Speaker 2>because you'll be so much more relaxed and know what

0:27:36.840 --> 0:27:37.160
<v Speaker 2>to do.

0:27:37.440 --> 0:27:39.400
<v Speaker 1>But the times that I took her, it was like, yeah,

0:27:39.400 --> 0:27:41.360
<v Speaker 1>she's got pneumonia, we have to put her on oxygen.

0:27:41.400 --> 0:27:43.320
<v Speaker 1>It wasn't ever chill, you know what I mean.

0:27:43.520 --> 0:27:46.600
<v Speaker 2>It was not like, hey, yeah, well monitor, but she's

0:27:46.640 --> 0:27:47.080
<v Speaker 2>gonna be fine.

0:27:47.200 --> 0:27:49.439
<v Speaker 1>She had a seizure and I had to go on

0:27:49.440 --> 0:27:50.960
<v Speaker 1>an ambulans like they were like.

0:27:51.320 --> 0:27:54.359
<v Speaker 2>Five killers underweat. Yeah, it's fine, you'll be fine with it.

0:27:55.800 --> 0:27:57.360
<v Speaker 1>All the things were really serious.

0:27:57.560 --> 0:27:59.280
<v Speaker 2>I said it, and then I remembered that they were

0:27:59.320 --> 0:28:01.679
<v Speaker 2>all really and they were not like ever just an

0:28:01.720 --> 0:28:03.440
<v Speaker 2>hour that you had to spend there.

0:28:03.720 --> 0:28:05.800
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't really bleak.

0:28:05.960 --> 0:28:08.560
<v Speaker 2>But actually, to be fair, that wasn't really. Most of

0:28:08.600 --> 0:28:11.760
<v Speaker 2>the things were not stuff she caught. Then that's true.

0:28:11.800 --> 0:28:12.520
<v Speaker 1>That is true.

0:28:12.680 --> 0:28:16.960
<v Speaker 2>Okay, so newborn complained number eight. Yeah, why do you

0:28:17.040 --> 0:28:18.840
<v Speaker 2>need to eat every three hours? You are not a

0:28:18.840 --> 0:28:22.600
<v Speaker 2>body build up and it suits absolutely no one. So

0:28:22.720 --> 0:28:23.800
<v Speaker 2>just load up and go to sleep.

0:28:24.880 --> 0:28:27.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean, I fucking agree. I'm not looking forward

0:28:27.920 --> 0:28:30.320
<v Speaker 1>to this three hour increments of sleeping.

0:28:30.680 --> 0:28:32.600
<v Speaker 2>I used to think that it's not three hours of

0:28:32.640 --> 0:28:36.000
<v Speaker 2>sleeping though. Key. This is where people fuck up when

0:28:36.000 --> 0:28:38.440
<v Speaker 2>they're fresh. Remember how long they take to eat.

0:28:38.560 --> 0:28:41.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, because they're like suckle is so like they haven't

0:28:41.720 --> 0:28:43.280
<v Speaker 1>developed it doesn't have any strength, and.

0:28:43.520 --> 0:28:45.800
<v Speaker 2>So you want them to be slow because the faster

0:28:45.840 --> 0:28:47.680
<v Speaker 2>they drink, the gassya they get. And remember they can't

0:28:47.680 --> 0:28:52.320
<v Speaker 2>gas themselves, degas themselves. Yeah, so they sometimes take like

0:28:52.360 --> 0:28:56.560
<v Speaker 2>an hour to eat something. Yeah, then it takes you

0:28:56.640 --> 0:29:00.320
<v Speaker 2>like half an hour to birth them. Then you've got

0:29:00.360 --> 0:29:03.160
<v Speaker 2>to change them, then you've got to settle them. Then

0:29:03.200 --> 0:29:06.600
<v Speaker 2>you've got to fall asleep yourself, so you maybe get done,

0:29:06.720 --> 0:29:08.880
<v Speaker 2>and you've got to start that three hour period from

0:29:08.880 --> 0:29:11.360
<v Speaker 2>the start of that feed, so then you maybe get

0:29:11.360 --> 0:29:12.280
<v Speaker 2>to sleep for an hour.

0:29:14.040 --> 0:29:16.880
<v Speaker 1>Freaking me out, thobe freaking me out right now.

0:29:16.920 --> 0:29:19.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm sorry, I'm just venting, but yeah, I realize you've

0:29:19.440 --> 0:29:19.880
<v Speaker 2>got to do it in.

0:29:20.160 --> 0:29:21.600
<v Speaker 1>My reality right now.

0:29:21.960 --> 0:29:24.320
<v Speaker 2>Gee, it's better to be prepared. It is like riding

0:29:24.320 --> 0:29:25.880
<v Speaker 2>a bike, though I feel I know.

0:29:26.080 --> 0:29:28.640
<v Speaker 1>I think Also the other thing is is like because

0:29:28.640 --> 0:29:31.880
<v Speaker 1>I don't think I ever properly established my supply because

0:29:31.880 --> 0:29:33.360
<v Speaker 1>I wore just like, oh my god, her life is

0:29:33.400 --> 0:29:35.280
<v Speaker 1>amazing you're doing great, blah blah blah, shut the door

0:29:35.280 --> 0:29:36.080
<v Speaker 1>and left us alone.

0:29:36.080 --> 0:29:38.120
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, but she's hungry.

0:29:38.160 --> 0:29:41.680
<v Speaker 1>But she's hungry I think because it never like actually

0:29:42.200 --> 0:29:46.360
<v Speaker 1>happened that what I was doing for breastfeeding was not accurate,

0:29:46.600 --> 0:29:49.560
<v Speaker 1>like so she would just like drain the boobs and

0:29:49.600 --> 0:29:51.760
<v Speaker 1>then I don't even think I really needed to burpa

0:29:51.800 --> 0:29:53.240
<v Speaker 1>that much. It was like a little burp and then

0:29:53.560 --> 0:29:56.680
<v Speaker 1>change the nappy back, so it was really quick. But

0:29:57.120 --> 0:29:59.800
<v Speaker 1>my girlfriends would be like, I'm watching TV shows while

0:29:59.800 --> 0:30:01.680
<v Speaker 1>I'm rest feeding. Oh yeah, yeah, I remember how you

0:30:01.680 --> 0:30:03.600
<v Speaker 1>were like you never watched any TV, and I was like,

0:30:04.280 --> 0:30:07.160
<v Speaker 1>I never had time too, because I was like sleeping.

0:30:07.320 --> 0:30:09.000
<v Speaker 2>I would watch TV in the middle of the night,

0:30:09.040 --> 0:30:11.000
<v Speaker 2>which everyone was always like, that's so bad for the

0:30:11.000 --> 0:30:13.000
<v Speaker 2>baby and for you because then it wakes you up.

0:30:13.040 --> 0:30:14.480
<v Speaker 2>But I'm like, I don't want to be sit alone

0:30:14.520 --> 0:30:15.120
<v Speaker 2>in the dark.

0:30:15.360 --> 0:30:17.280
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and also you don't want to fall asleep when

0:30:17.320 --> 0:30:19.320
<v Speaker 1>you're feeding because it's a little bit Oh that's never

0:30:19.360 --> 0:30:21.000
<v Speaker 1>going to happen, but like that's the thing is like

0:30:21.160 --> 0:30:24.400
<v Speaker 1>I don't think I ever did it properly, so then

0:30:24.400 --> 0:30:25.600
<v Speaker 1>when you're telling me that, I'm.

0:30:25.440 --> 0:30:27.720
<v Speaker 2>Like, fuck, some people are fast feeders, but even then

0:30:27.760 --> 0:30:30.760
<v Speaker 2>it's still like a really really tedious process, and like,

0:30:30.800 --> 0:30:33.040
<v Speaker 2>why why must you eat every three hours?

0:30:33.280 --> 0:30:35.600
<v Speaker 1>Load up too much? It's honestly it's too much.

0:30:35.680 --> 0:30:38.760
<v Speaker 2>And new born complaint number nine teeny tiny clothes and

0:30:38.760 --> 0:30:40.560
<v Speaker 2>teeny tiny silly little limbs.

0:30:41.000 --> 0:30:44.240
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm actually breaking the little twigs. I'm looking forward

0:30:44.280 --> 0:30:45.959
<v Speaker 1>to a summer baby for that reason because it's like

0:30:46.040 --> 0:30:46.840
<v Speaker 1>much less clothes.

0:30:47.040 --> 0:30:49.240
<v Speaker 2>Peas messaging me like, but what do you dress them with?

0:30:49.280 --> 0:30:51.080
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, honestly, do not buy anything in

0:30:51.120 --> 0:30:55.440
<v Speaker 2>a quadriple, a four zero, whatever thing you newborn sizes are,

0:30:55.760 --> 0:30:59.400
<v Speaker 2>because it's so unnecessary with the summer baby, Like, dressing

0:30:59.440 --> 0:31:04.560
<v Speaker 2>them is horrifyingly scary. Sometimes people still make clothes with buttons.

0:31:04.800 --> 0:31:09.680
<v Speaker 1>Why Yeah, cute but wildly silly. Yeah, it doesn't work.

0:31:09.760 --> 0:31:12.280
<v Speaker 2>We need to collectively agree, I think, because newborn baby

0:31:12.280 --> 0:31:15.040
<v Speaker 2>clothes shouldn't exist. They will simply be wrapped like a

0:31:15.080 --> 0:31:17.200
<v Speaker 2>fish and chip package for the first few months, and

0:31:17.240 --> 0:31:19.880
<v Speaker 2>then we can start bothering with cute clothes. Yeah a

0:31:20.120 --> 0:31:23.120
<v Speaker 2>hundred pe they're already ugly. Your little hat and your

0:31:23.120 --> 0:31:26.040
<v Speaker 2>silly outfit does not make it that much cuter. Just

0:31:26.120 --> 0:31:30.560
<v Speaker 2>swaddle it the booties, just swaddle it up. Yeah, I

0:31:30.600 --> 0:31:32.680
<v Speaker 2>get it if it's a winter baby. I don't know

0:31:32.720 --> 0:31:36.520
<v Speaker 2>why we still are trying to dress our children in

0:31:36.560 --> 0:31:38.960
<v Speaker 2>cute clothes like they are not cute.

0:31:39.600 --> 0:31:41.360
<v Speaker 1>Stop trying to make cute apps, Stop.

0:31:41.200 --> 0:31:43.880
<v Speaker 2>Trying to make cute happen. It is a small wrinkled

0:31:43.920 --> 0:31:47.320
<v Speaker 2>daily in potato, dressed in silly, little overpriced clothes that

0:31:47.320 --> 0:31:49.520
<v Speaker 2>will end up in landfill. Let's just wrap our children

0:31:49.600 --> 0:31:50.600
<v Speaker 2>up like fish and chips.

0:31:50.720 --> 0:31:54.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I've literally got one kind of like summer shorts

0:31:54.720 --> 0:31:56.040
<v Speaker 1>and top just to like have.

0:31:56.320 --> 0:32:00.880
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's yeah. And like one bag like sleepsack that

0:32:01.080 --> 0:32:02.520
<v Speaker 2>I bought Lenny's Spenders.

0:32:03.320 --> 0:32:06.360
<v Speaker 1>I was gonna be like, I bring up I know

0:32:06.480 --> 0:32:08.120
<v Speaker 1>you're like, I've got his outfit to meet rue. And

0:32:08.120 --> 0:32:11.440
<v Speaker 1>I was like, this is so funny. Why one day

0:32:11.440 --> 0:32:12.720
<v Speaker 1>we're gonna giggle about this.

0:32:12.840 --> 0:32:15.080
<v Speaker 2>One day we will giggle about this. And he screamed

0:32:15.080 --> 0:32:16.720
<v Speaker 2>at me the entire time I was gettinghim dressed, and

0:32:16.760 --> 0:32:19.800
<v Speaker 2>he shat over everything, like it's just you think, oh,

0:32:19.840 --> 0:32:21.959
<v Speaker 2>it's like cheap. No it's not when they're gonna wear

0:32:22.040 --> 0:32:22.440
<v Speaker 2>it once.

0:32:22.920 --> 0:32:23.960
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so true.

0:32:24.040 --> 0:32:28.000
<v Speaker 2>And people do not buy people. Baby, clothes, like buy

0:32:28.000 --> 0:32:31.800
<v Speaker 2>them something really handy, like a really simple cotton short

0:32:31.920 --> 0:32:34.840
<v Speaker 2>like yeah yeah, or like a Bonds onesI or something,

0:32:34.960 --> 0:32:37.000
<v Speaker 2>or just buy them. You know what we recently bought

0:32:37.240 --> 0:32:39.400
<v Speaker 2>my sister in law who had a baby. We bought

0:32:39.400 --> 0:32:41.040
<v Speaker 2>her like four packets and newborn nappies.

0:32:41.360 --> 0:32:45.360
<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah, that's so helpful, right, yeah. Actually, Maddie who

0:32:45.400 --> 0:32:47.600
<v Speaker 1>was our producer, we used to work together when we

0:32:47.680 --> 0:32:51.960
<v Speaker 1>worked in media together, and she for ru'se birth gave

0:32:52.040 --> 0:32:56.160
<v Speaker 1>me this full on like hamper with everything you could

0:32:56.200 --> 0:32:58.600
<v Speaker 1>need from the pharmacy. That's how I got that recommendation.

0:32:58.600 --> 0:33:01.040
<v Speaker 1>I've given that recommendation that was from Maddie and it

0:33:01.080 --> 0:33:02.720
<v Speaker 1>had like everything. And then she's like, and a doll

0:33:02.840 --> 0:33:04.800
<v Speaker 1>because all baby girls need a doll.

0:33:04.840 --> 0:33:06.240
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, you could do like a little

0:33:06.280 --> 0:33:09.720
<v Speaker 2>baby bath with everything in there. That's so handy.

0:33:09.840 --> 0:33:11.440
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, the little snuggle you know.

0:33:11.480 --> 0:33:14.280
<v Speaker 2>Helicopter Luke insist on getting one with like the temperature,

0:33:14.920 --> 0:33:16.200
<v Speaker 2>like a proper temperature age.

0:33:17.120 --> 0:33:20.880
<v Speaker 1>Actually, one of Charlie's friends was like, his wife is pregnant,

0:33:20.920 --> 0:33:23.280
<v Speaker 1>and he was talking about the lists that have been

0:33:23.280 --> 0:33:25.040
<v Speaker 1>shared with them of things that you need to get,

0:33:25.080 --> 0:33:26.840
<v Speaker 1>and he was just like, go it's this list like

0:33:27.240 --> 0:33:29.560
<v Speaker 1>seems a bit excessive, and they're like yeah, yeah, mate,

0:33:29.680 --> 0:33:31.480
<v Speaker 1>like you buy a lot of stuff and you don't

0:33:31.560 --> 0:33:34.040
<v Speaker 1>end up using And he's like, yeah, like do you

0:33:34.120 --> 0:33:37.400
<v Speaker 1>really need a thermometer? And the boys are like, it's

0:33:37.480 --> 0:33:39.160
<v Speaker 1>kind of the one thing that you do really need.

0:33:39.880 --> 0:33:43.959
<v Speaker 2>I didn't use mine what until Lenny was like, but

0:33:44.080 --> 0:33:44.720
<v Speaker 2>like for the.

0:33:44.600 --> 0:33:47.440
<v Speaker 1>Bath for the room them, for them.

0:33:47.920 --> 0:33:49.680
<v Speaker 2>There was one and inbuilt one in the bar.

0:33:49.880 --> 0:33:51.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so different but yeah, still say and.

0:33:51.680 --> 0:33:54.160
<v Speaker 2>Then we had just like on the kubo Ai it

0:33:54.200 --> 0:33:58.000
<v Speaker 2>says the temperature, so he used the moment if for

0:33:58.160 --> 0:34:00.280
<v Speaker 2>him though for so long.

0:34:00.600 --> 0:34:03.920
<v Speaker 1>Oh we had one that was like room bath and baby.

0:34:04.080 --> 0:34:07.120
<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, so good handy. Yeah, it's like, body, let's

0:34:07.120 --> 0:34:09.760
<v Speaker 2>think of that any tro notes because that's actually genius.

0:34:09.960 --> 0:34:13.200
<v Speaker 1>It's a little gun. Oh.

0:34:13.239 --> 0:34:14.520
<v Speaker 2>I don't think they're very effective.

0:34:14.840 --> 0:34:18.120
<v Speaker 1>They are really, yeah, because I always take a temp

0:34:18.200 --> 0:34:20.239
<v Speaker 1>with the gun and then the one that's under the

0:34:20.320 --> 0:34:22.600
<v Speaker 1>arm to make sure, and I take multiple the one

0:34:22.600 --> 0:34:25.000
<v Speaker 1>in the ear. Yeah, and I've got one of those two.

0:34:25.040 --> 0:34:28.760
<v Speaker 1>Actually why I got given like all these different versions

0:34:28.760 --> 0:34:30.080
<v Speaker 1>of it, So I'm like, cool, I'm gonna use all

0:34:30.080 --> 0:34:31.120
<v Speaker 1>of them to get an accurate freak.

0:34:31.200 --> 0:34:32.920
<v Speaker 2>One of my gorfriends was like, why do I have

0:34:33.000 --> 0:34:34.840
<v Speaker 2>ten nose freeders? And I was like, because it's a

0:34:34.920 --> 0:34:38.000
<v Speaker 2>very handy gift. It is, it is, and they're ten

0:34:38.080 --> 0:34:39.840
<v Speaker 2>dollars from Amazon. If it's great. If you don't know

0:34:39.840 --> 0:34:42.240
<v Speaker 2>what to get someone with the babys freer, they'll get used.

0:34:42.960 --> 0:34:44.800
<v Speaker 2>When he pulled the it out of the drawer the

0:34:44.840 --> 0:34:46.680
<v Speaker 2>other day, that one was like, Mummy, do snot and

0:34:46.760 --> 0:34:49.160
<v Speaker 2>I was like, ill, no, you're not that snutty, but

0:34:49.560 --> 0:34:51.279
<v Speaker 2>I only do it like if it really needs to

0:34:51.320 --> 0:34:53.440
<v Speaker 2>be done. Still, like, hey, you can sneeze and get

0:34:53.440 --> 0:34:53.719
<v Speaker 2>it out.

0:34:53.920 --> 0:34:55.319
<v Speaker 1>I never used because you have to do it with

0:34:55.320 --> 0:34:56.000
<v Speaker 1>your mouth, right.

0:34:56.239 --> 0:34:59.399
<v Speaker 2>I'm just so much better than the snotsucker. Oh, I

0:34:59.520 --> 0:35:02.880
<v Speaker 2>like the snow doesn't get in there well enough my

0:35:02.960 --> 0:35:06.440
<v Speaker 2>lung capacity. I'm just like, I just kind of stuff.

0:35:06.480 --> 0:35:07.120
<v Speaker 2>I get out of it.

0:35:07.360 --> 0:35:08.879
<v Speaker 1>I can't do it. It's not sucking.

0:35:09.080 --> 0:35:13.319
<v Speaker 2>Sucks okay, sorry, it's ninety bucks. Silly, ninety dollars to spend,

0:35:13.360 --> 0:35:13.840
<v Speaker 2>I would.

0:35:13.680 --> 0:35:16.520
<v Speaker 1>Say, SnO, No, just the ones that you get from

0:35:16.600 --> 0:35:18.320
<v Speaker 1>the like, oh.

0:35:18.239 --> 0:35:19.520
<v Speaker 2>Those I never tried one of those.

0:35:19.520 --> 0:35:21.640
<v Speaker 1>They're really good. It's like a little balloon with a

0:35:21.680 --> 0:35:25.279
<v Speaker 1>little plastic. Yeah, and you put the saline solution in. Yeah.

0:35:25.320 --> 0:35:27.400
<v Speaker 2>No, I've heard that those are really good. They're really

0:35:27.840 --> 0:35:29.800
<v Speaker 2>about that. It was like a ninety dollars one, like

0:35:29.840 --> 0:35:33.160
<v Speaker 2>an automatic auto one. Why just use your mouth?

0:35:33.400 --> 0:35:36.640
<v Speaker 1>Okay?

0:35:37.280 --> 0:35:43.879
<v Speaker 2>Newborn complaints number ten. Why are you so noisy when

0:35:43.920 --> 0:35:47.040
<v Speaker 2>you sleep? You are so small? It sounds like there's

0:35:47.080 --> 0:35:48.760
<v Speaker 2>an elderly plug in the room.

0:35:48.880 --> 0:35:52.880
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's not good, and that's why I think people

0:35:53.000 --> 0:35:54.920
<v Speaker 1>want to get them out of the room so quickly,

0:35:55.160 --> 0:35:59.239
<v Speaker 1>Like it's because it's impossible to sleep, and also you're

0:35:59.239 --> 0:36:01.560
<v Speaker 1>on highlot, especially at first. I don't know if it's

0:36:01.560 --> 0:36:04.240
<v Speaker 1>the same for a second, it's like any little noise, You're.

0:36:04.080 --> 0:36:07.279
<v Speaker 2>Like, that's why people sleep with you're plugs in, because

0:36:07.280 --> 0:36:09.040
<v Speaker 2>you're still going to hear the baby when it's hungry,

0:36:09.080 --> 0:36:10.920
<v Speaker 2>but not going to hear that crying. You're going to

0:36:10.960 --> 0:36:20.719
<v Speaker 2>hear the legs in the air. It's so noisy. Final complaint,

0:36:21.920 --> 0:36:24.080
<v Speaker 2>Why is your scalp coming off? And why can't I

0:36:24.120 --> 0:36:28.759
<v Speaker 2>pick it the cradle cap? I loved the cradle cut.

0:36:29.280 --> 0:36:31.359
<v Speaker 2>I'm so annoyed that Lenny didn't get it worse because

0:36:31.400 --> 0:36:32.479
<v Speaker 2>I loved picking it.

0:36:32.360 --> 0:36:34.360
<v Speaker 1>In rude didn't get it too badly.

0:36:34.480 --> 0:36:36.359
<v Speaker 2>But why is your scalp coming off?

0:36:36.440 --> 0:36:37.880
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I don't understand it.

0:36:37.960 --> 0:36:40.439
<v Speaker 2>Well you should because you get sosiriasis, but you didn't

0:36:40.440 --> 0:36:41.279
<v Speaker 2>even understand it.

0:36:41.280 --> 0:36:44.120
<v Speaker 1>Bru's got a little bit of this, poor girl. And

0:36:44.320 --> 0:36:46.960
<v Speaker 1>when the knitt thing happened at daycare, I was just like,

0:36:47.400 --> 0:36:49.080
<v Speaker 1>because it was starting to get hot, and so she

0:36:49.160 --> 0:36:51.040
<v Speaker 1>was scratching her head because she had a little crisis

0:36:51.080 --> 0:36:53.319
<v Speaker 1>flair and I was just like, if I have to

0:36:53.360 --> 0:36:55.680
<v Speaker 1>shave her heir, Yeah, it's gonna be a lot. Wait.

0:36:55.719 --> 0:36:57.400
<v Speaker 1>I want to look up cradle cap and I'm like,

0:36:57.440 --> 0:36:58.399
<v Speaker 1>why they have it?

0:36:58.920 --> 0:37:01.760
<v Speaker 2>Why do you have to have so many things about gross?

0:37:02.160 --> 0:37:06.560
<v Speaker 1>Oh it comes because they've got excessive oil by skin glands,

0:37:07.360 --> 0:37:08.719
<v Speaker 1>so it causes scales.

0:37:09.440 --> 0:37:11.640
<v Speaker 2>So satisfying to pick though, even though you're not supposed

0:37:11.640 --> 0:37:11.719
<v Speaker 2>to do.

0:37:11.880 --> 0:37:14.239
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you're not supposed to pick it, right, But some

0:37:14.320 --> 0:37:18.439
<v Speaker 1>kids have it really old, like three four. We'll still

0:37:18.480 --> 0:37:21.160
<v Speaker 1>have it quite badly. It's making me feel grossed.

0:37:21.200 --> 0:37:23.880
<v Speaker 2>All right, let me tell you some good things so

0:37:23.920 --> 0:37:27.279
<v Speaker 2>you're not completely off the wrinkly, useless alien that you've

0:37:27.320 --> 0:37:29.320
<v Speaker 2>made and that you're about to birth.

0:37:29.360 --> 0:37:29.759
<v Speaker 1>All right.

0:37:30.719 --> 0:37:34.080
<v Speaker 2>Firstly, the noises when they eat.

0:37:34.400 --> 0:37:37.120
<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah, they're really sweet.

0:37:39.400 --> 0:37:41.359
<v Speaker 2>And then they do the little gulps and Lenny would

0:37:41.360 --> 0:37:42.799
<v Speaker 2>always put his little hand on.

0:37:42.840 --> 0:37:45.879
<v Speaker 1>My arm like yeah, oh my god.

0:37:46.000 --> 0:37:48.200
<v Speaker 2>Yes, and the way they look at you while they're

0:37:48.239 --> 0:37:52.480
<v Speaker 2>eating and they're just like, it's really sweet and their

0:37:52.520 --> 0:37:53.760
<v Speaker 2>little gulping noises.

0:37:53.880 --> 0:37:58.279
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm actually really looking forward to feeding this time around. Well,

0:37:58.320 --> 0:38:00.239
<v Speaker 1>not that I wasn't before, but it's just like to

0:38:00.280 --> 0:38:02.520
<v Speaker 1>be like nice like that kind of like bonding and

0:38:03.360 --> 0:38:05.560
<v Speaker 1>just them being really sweet.

0:38:06.800 --> 0:38:12.400
<v Speaker 2>The fish when they're hungry and they start doing it

0:38:12.440 --> 0:38:16.799
<v Speaker 2>to like everyone like your elbow, your shoulder, yeah, your neck,

0:38:17.320 --> 0:38:18.480
<v Speaker 2>anyone that's holding them.

0:38:19.719 --> 0:38:22.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Yeah. I was holding them every the other end

0:38:22.040 --> 0:38:23.680
<v Speaker 1>and they did it, and I was like, oh, I think.

0:38:23.520 --> 0:38:25.879
<v Speaker 2>You might want to feed up you get but they

0:38:25.960 --> 0:38:26.319
<v Speaker 2>do it?

0:38:27.080 --> 0:38:27.719
<v Speaker 1>Do you do?

0:38:27.840 --> 0:38:30.600
<v Speaker 2>And then but then you're like, whoa, well, there's nothing

0:38:30.600 --> 0:38:32.560
<v Speaker 2>in there for you. You're like a little bit of colastum.

0:38:33.120 --> 0:38:34.520
<v Speaker 2>Don't send me into labor please.

0:38:35.440 --> 0:38:37.560
<v Speaker 1>It's so true. Anyone need a wet nose.

0:38:39.000 --> 0:38:41.319
<v Speaker 2>The little scrunch that they do when you pick them

0:38:41.400 --> 0:38:41.960
<v Speaker 2>up out of a.

0:38:42.320 --> 0:38:46.560
<v Speaker 1>Oh yes, I forgot about the scrunch.

0:38:47.360 --> 0:38:50.080
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, their whole little face scrunches as well.

0:38:50.360 --> 0:38:53.439
<v Speaker 1>That is really cute. Wait are these going to freaking

0:38:53.520 --> 0:38:56.360
<v Speaker 1>make me cry? Right now? They better not put it together?

0:38:56.440 --> 0:39:02.080
<v Speaker 2>Can put together their silly little face in cheeks. Don't

0:39:02.160 --> 0:39:04.480
<v Speaker 2>like the little cheeks and you just want to put

0:39:04.480 --> 0:39:06.640
<v Speaker 2>their whole cheek well, and it's not covered in acne

0:39:06.640 --> 0:39:09.520
<v Speaker 2>in your mouth? And you did you ever do that?

0:39:09.600 --> 0:39:10.520
<v Speaker 2>Or is that a weird me thing?

0:39:10.560 --> 0:39:12.160
<v Speaker 1>Nothing, it's a you thing. But I can see how

0:39:12.160 --> 0:39:12.680
<v Speaker 1>you did it.

0:39:12.680 --> 0:39:15.719
<v Speaker 2>Just nibbling on every single little part of them. And

0:39:15.760 --> 0:39:19.440
<v Speaker 2>then finally it's so cliche, but the.

0:39:19.400 --> 0:39:21.240
<v Speaker 1>Smell, oh yeah, the smell.

0:39:21.920 --> 0:39:24.399
<v Speaker 2>Give me that smell. And whenever I'm like, I'm aware

0:39:24.440 --> 0:39:27.959
<v Speaker 2>that I'm sniffing your breast milk, I don't care. It's

0:39:28.000 --> 0:39:31.640
<v Speaker 2>so good. Yeah, it's a drug, it's so good.

0:39:32.080 --> 0:39:35.520
<v Speaker 1>Sometimes I feel like when I meet my new friend's babies,

0:39:35.560 --> 0:39:37.480
<v Speaker 1>it's just like that I've sniffed them a little bit

0:39:37.480 --> 0:39:37.919
<v Speaker 1>too long.

0:39:38.280 --> 0:39:42.080
<v Speaker 2>I don't. I think that that's just very normal. I

0:39:42.120 --> 0:39:44.480
<v Speaker 2>still like to find little sweaty parts on Lenny and

0:39:44.480 --> 0:39:47.239
<v Speaker 2>sniff them like I don't know, they've just they've got

0:39:47.320 --> 0:39:50.120
<v Speaker 2>such little kids as well, Like I don't know, he's

0:39:50.120 --> 0:39:52.399
<v Speaker 2>not at a stinky stage sweat kind of like.

0:39:52.440 --> 0:39:55.279
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I like, I really like the smell of rue.

0:39:55.440 --> 0:39:57.080
<v Speaker 1>Like they don't sweat yet.

0:39:57.000 --> 0:39:59.720
<v Speaker 2>Well they do, but like it's like cute smelly sweat.

0:40:00.120 --> 0:40:00.560
<v Speaker 1>Can't relate.

0:40:01.120 --> 0:40:04.719
<v Speaker 2>Oh my same, So I like find a little and

0:40:04.719 --> 0:40:06.399
<v Speaker 2>then I just bury my nose in that one little

0:40:06.400 --> 0:40:07.040
<v Speaker 2>spot and I'm.

0:40:06.880 --> 0:40:10.080
<v Speaker 1>Like, oh my gosh, I love it.

0:40:10.080 --> 0:40:11.279
<v Speaker 2>I would never do it to anyone else.

0:40:11.360 --> 0:40:11.560
<v Speaker 1>Yuck.

0:40:11.640 --> 0:40:13.560
<v Speaker 2>Even anyone else is kid after it's not a baby.

0:40:13.600 --> 0:40:15.759
<v Speaker 1>Look, I do like the smell of Charlie when he's

0:40:15.800 --> 0:40:17.440
<v Speaker 1>like a little bit muscle. You're fucked.

0:40:18.239 --> 0:40:23.440
<v Speaker 2>Sorry, you're actually there's something rotten. Nah, nah, I'm off

0:40:23.480 --> 0:40:31.400
<v Speaker 2>it all right. Recommendations. I've mentioned this many a time.

0:40:32.160 --> 0:40:33.879
<v Speaker 2>How are your noise canceling headphones going?

0:40:34.239 --> 0:40:34.560
<v Speaker 1>Oh?

0:40:34.680 --> 0:40:36.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you look at you glad that you've.

0:40:36.480 --> 0:40:38.720
<v Speaker 1>Got them for the newborn? Yeah, I am actually glad.

0:40:38.840 --> 0:40:40.640
<v Speaker 1>It'll be good just to have them, and I think

0:40:40.640 --> 0:40:41.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna need it this son.

0:40:41.880 --> 0:40:46.239
<v Speaker 2>Just like noise canceling headphones so you can gaze at

0:40:46.239 --> 0:40:49.600
<v Speaker 2>your baby while they're feeding and listen to a book. Yeah,

0:40:49.680 --> 0:40:51.839
<v Speaker 2>because like it's cute, but you don't it's a lot

0:40:51.880 --> 0:40:53.600
<v Speaker 2>of time of the day that you're feeding, so you

0:40:53.640 --> 0:40:57.680
<v Speaker 2>want to listen to something. Yeah, the noise canceling part,

0:40:57.840 --> 0:41:00.480
<v Speaker 2>even just to turn that on when the baby's screaming,

0:41:00.600 --> 0:41:02.359
<v Speaker 2>just to like lessen it a little bit.

0:41:02.680 --> 0:41:04.960
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's gonna be good, because I think I'm gonna

0:41:04.960 --> 0:41:07.160
<v Speaker 1>be really highly strung, probably.

0:41:06.760 --> 0:41:07.680
<v Speaker 2>With the toddler as well.

0:41:07.719 --> 0:41:10.840
<v Speaker 1>That's pushing you by Yeah, and at first, like just

0:41:10.920 --> 0:41:14.160
<v Speaker 1>that like screaming that you're not quite used to.

0:41:14.480 --> 0:41:17.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, the newborn. Yeahs insides hurt a little bit, you're

0:41:17.560 --> 0:41:21.160
<v Speaker 2>just like WHOA. Thank you so much for joining us today.

0:41:21.200 --> 0:41:23.879
<v Speaker 2>Make sure you share the pod on your socials. Let

0:41:23.960 --> 0:41:25.239
<v Speaker 2>us know what you think and what you want to

0:41:25.280 --> 0:41:28.600
<v Speaker 2>hear from us, and you can find us on Instagram

0:41:28.600 --> 0:41:32.560
<v Speaker 2>at Kyries, at Kelly Underscore mccaren, and at ISR dot pod.

0:41:32.920 --> 0:41:35.920
<v Speaker 1>This episode was produced by us Key and Kel, with

0:41:36.000 --> 0:41:39.920
<v Speaker 1>audio production by our wonderful producer Madeline Joanno.

0:41:40.520 --> 0:41:41.439
<v Speaker 2>Bye bye