WEBVTT - ‘October Theory’ Might Explain The Vibe Shift 0:00:10.327 --> 0:00:14.807 You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast. Mama Maya acknowledges 0:00:14.847 --> 0:00:17.607 the traditional owners of land and waters that this podcast 0:00:17.647 --> 0:00:24.047 is recorded on Hello and welcome to Mamma Mia out 0:00:24.047 --> 0:00:26.407 Loud and to our Friday show where we take a 0:00:26.407 --> 0:00:29.847 break from the news cycle and breathe out but not 0:00:29.887 --> 0:00:32.847 with our mouths open. If we recently ate something with garlic. 0:00:33.527 --> 0:00:37.047 Today's Friday, October the eleventh, and I'm Meya Friedman. 0:00:37.087 --> 0:00:39.927 I'm Jesse Stevens. And guess who where joined by today? 0:00:40.087 --> 0:00:41.287 Not Holly, not Holly. 0:00:41.647 --> 0:00:44.167 It's me the Esteemed, So we have to say now 0:00:44.407 --> 0:00:45.527 esteemed Amelia Lester. 0:00:46.447 --> 0:00:48.567 It does say in the script not to do that 0:00:48.647 --> 0:00:49.767 joke anymore, but. 0:00:52.047 --> 0:00:55.567 I wrote that, but let's go with her was looking 0:00:55.687 --> 0:00:58.407 and yet here we are. But on the show today, 0:00:58.687 --> 0:01:02.447 have you noticed everyone's counseling plans from dinners to meetings? 0:01:02.847 --> 0:01:05.847 What is behind our inability to commit? Why does it 0:01:05.847 --> 0:01:09.607 feel so so good? Plus a life changing wardrob pack 0:01:09.727 --> 0:01:12.007 and some good things to read and watch over your 0:01:12.047 --> 0:01:15.567 weekend and a much needed tip for elder millennials. It's 0:01:15.607 --> 0:01:18.567 our recommendations, and we wrap up the week with our 0:01:18.567 --> 0:01:21.647 best and Worst, which includes Spooky Season a surprising hangover 0:01:21.927 --> 0:01:23.447 in the scoop from a long weekend. 0:01:23.807 --> 0:01:26.487 But first, in case you missed it, allow me to 0:01:26.527 --> 0:01:29.807 introduce you to October theory, the reason you might have 0:01:29.927 --> 0:01:33.767 noticed an energy shift lately. October theory states that the 0:01:33.807 --> 0:01:37.447 beginning of October is almost like a new year. A 0:01:37.527 --> 0:01:41.327 viral TikTok video by Chloe von Berkel explains that this 0:01:41.407 --> 0:01:44.807 is the time when everyone realizes there are only three 0:01:44.927 --> 0:01:47.087 months left of the year, and there are a lot 0:01:47.127 --> 0:01:49.127 of things that you meant to do at the beginning 0:01:49.127 --> 0:01:50.047 that you'd forgotten about. 0:01:50.167 --> 0:01:51.727 Because of that, this is a time when a lot 0:01:51.727 --> 0:01:53.447 of people are going to be making a lot of 0:01:53.487 --> 0:01:56.447 big life changes and a lot of major LFE decisions, 0:01:56.487 --> 0:01:59.327 and a lot of just like canon events will be 0:01:59.327 --> 0:02:01.487 happening for a lot of different people at this time. 0:02:01.607 --> 0:02:05.127 But wait, there's more, Because apparently if you go through 0:02:05.167 --> 0:02:08.287 your camera roll and type in the word October and 0:02:08.367 --> 0:02:12.167 you examine your parts October's, then big things happen. It's 0:02:12.207 --> 0:02:15.367 a month of enormous change. So October is also meant 0:02:15.407 --> 0:02:19.647 to signal something called cuffing season, which means that breakups happen, 0:02:19.847 --> 0:02:23.767 new relationships are booming, lots happens with work ladies, Are 0:02:23.807 --> 0:02:26.567 we feeling the vibe shift? There's only eighty one days 0:02:26.607 --> 0:02:27.167 left of the year. 0:02:27.807 --> 0:02:28.727 What is cuffing mean? 0:02:31.647 --> 0:02:34.127 I don't know. Something to do with relationships. Oh, I 0:02:34.127 --> 0:02:35.127 don't know. I was on TikTok. 0:02:35.407 --> 0:02:38.767 Well, I've definitely noticed a vibe shift. But my birthday 0:02:38.847 --> 0:02:41.007 funnily enough not to bring this back to me. But 0:02:41.167 --> 0:02:46.847 is October one? So my birth actually kicks off new year. 0:02:46.927 --> 0:02:49.447 Some would say the new year, well just beginning of 0:02:49.487 --> 0:02:53.167 time really, so what I feel about October? I know 0:02:53.327 --> 0:02:55.807 very little about horses. I've only ridden them a couple 0:02:55.847 --> 0:02:59.287 of times. I once told a guy who invited me 0:02:59.327 --> 0:03:01.327 to go horse riding that I knew how to ride 0:03:01.327 --> 0:03:03.767 a horse, and he assumed that because I was Australian 0:03:03.887 --> 0:03:06.207 he was English, that, of course everyone in Australia knows 0:03:06.207 --> 0:03:07.967 how to ride a horse. And I was going to 0:03:08.007 --> 0:03:09.727 pull it off really well. In fact, I thought I 0:03:09.767 --> 0:03:11.567 did until I tried to get on the horse on 0:03:11.607 --> 0:03:15.687 the wrong side. But anyone see, yeah, I know who 0:03:15.767 --> 0:03:20.367 knew that there's a thing with horses when they see 0:03:20.367 --> 0:03:23.447 home or they sense home or something, they'll run because 0:03:23.447 --> 0:03:27.447 it's like I've mangled that. But sometimes horses go out 0:03:27.487 --> 0:03:30.367 of control when you point them to home. No one 0:03:30.407 --> 0:03:35.287 knows anything what I feel. What I feel like is 0:03:35.327 --> 0:03:39.607 October is a horse, and when it sees the end 0:03:39.647 --> 0:03:42.207 of the year. I feel like October is when the 0:03:42.207 --> 0:03:45.487 horse sees home, which is the end of the year. 0:03:45.567 --> 0:03:48.447 We gallop and then it starts running fast. I have 0:03:48.487 --> 0:03:51.727 a less tortured analogy. How how could you have a 0:03:51.807 --> 0:03:53.287 less tortured analogy than that? 0:03:54.407 --> 0:03:57.127 I find this time of year stressful because you know 0:03:57.167 --> 0:03:59.407 what time of year it is. It's let's catch up 0:03:59.447 --> 0:04:03.407 before Christmas? Sh right, Yeah, you're absolutely right, and then 0:04:03.567 --> 0:04:05.567 you just know that you're not going to see this 0:04:05.647 --> 0:04:06.927 person for another two years. 0:04:06.967 --> 0:04:10.007 The good news is that it's also the time in 0:04:10.047 --> 0:04:12.847 small talk season when you can start saying, what are 0:04:12.847 --> 0:04:13.927 your plans for Christmas? 0:04:14.247 --> 0:04:17.247 Have you found that there's a renewed like your goals 0:04:17.247 --> 0:04:19.127 for the year or what you're meant to do? Do 0:04:19.167 --> 0:04:22.127 you feel like you never kind of no? I can't 0:04:22.127 --> 0:04:23.687 even ask shit, I forgot my word. 0:04:23.727 --> 0:04:25.287 I was going to say. This is usually out loud, 0:04:25.287 --> 0:04:28.167 to say, what's your word? How's it going, Amelia? What's 0:04:28.167 --> 0:04:30.327 your word this year? This is a tangent, but go. 0:04:30.407 --> 0:04:32.807 On Oh gosh, well, I haven't. I made a big 0:04:32.847 --> 0:04:35.487 move this year. I moved from the US back to 0:04:35.527 --> 0:04:39.047 Australia after nearly twenty years away. That's not an answer 0:04:39.087 --> 0:04:41.487 to the question. It's not. But I've just been trying 0:04:41.487 --> 0:04:45.047 to survive and set up my electricity billain. Okay, it's 0:04:45.127 --> 0:04:45.487 not been. 0:04:45.807 --> 0:04:49.687 Your word of the year has been utilities, and yours 0:04:49.727 --> 0:04:57.727 is horses. Apparently you'll run. 0:05:02.127 --> 0:05:02.607 We are. 0:05:05.647 --> 0:05:08.527 A couple of weeks ago, I was in Melbourne and 0:05:09.007 --> 0:05:12.687 I I had some time open up suddenly, and I 0:05:12.767 --> 0:05:15.887 called my friend Sally, friend of the pod out louder 0:05:16.087 --> 0:05:18.447 het Worth, and I said, you want to have dinner 0:05:19.007 --> 0:05:21.607 any chance? And she's like, yep, I'll make it work. 0:05:21.967 --> 0:05:25.127 We made a plan and then I had to cancel 0:05:25.167 --> 0:05:27.727 because I had to go back to Sydney. So then 0:05:27.767 --> 0:05:29.887 I canceled and I'm like, stand down, can't do it, 0:05:29.927 --> 0:05:32.327 And she said, thank you so much for the gift 0:05:32.367 --> 0:05:36.247 of a canceled evening, which is so much better than 0:05:36.327 --> 0:05:38.367 just having a night with no plans to begin with. 0:05:38.887 --> 0:05:40.567 Oh absolutely, you know yes. 0:05:41.007 --> 0:05:43.527 And it made me think of a story that was 0:05:43.767 --> 0:05:46.607 hugely popular this week on Mamma Mia called the Rise 0:05:46.647 --> 0:05:48.967 of the last minute cancelor and why all your friends 0:05:49.047 --> 0:05:51.047 are doing it. It's a piece written for Mamma Maya 0:05:51.447 --> 0:05:54.607 by Beck Day, and she wrote, bailing on plans was 0:05:54.647 --> 0:05:57.767 once a guilty, whispered confession that has now swelled into 0:05:57.807 --> 0:06:01.447 a roaring declaration of self care. The joy of canceled 0:06:01.447 --> 0:06:05.647 plans is an intoxicating elixa, and our generation is drunk 0:06:05.647 --> 0:06:09.127 on it. She also talks about how in twenty twenty 0:06:09.447 --> 0:06:13.767 a person called Maddie Kahan wrote this tweet that went viral, 0:06:13.887 --> 0:06:17.687 and the tweet was the app is called You're Canceled. 0:06:17.847 --> 0:06:20.327 When you've made plans and you wish you could cancel, 0:06:20.727 --> 0:06:22.767 you go into the app and press a little button. 0:06:23.087 --> 0:06:27.327 If the other person presses theirs too, congratulations, confetti explodes 0:06:27.327 --> 0:06:29.847 and your plans are canceled. If you press yours but 0:06:29.847 --> 0:06:32.967 the other person doesn't, your plans remain intact and they 0:06:33.007 --> 0:06:36.647 never find out that you wanted to cancel. And that pitch, 0:06:36.687 --> 0:06:39.647 which was actually just sort of made up, has since 0:06:39.687 --> 0:06:42.767 become an actual app, unfortunately not available in Australia yet. 0:06:42.767 --> 0:06:45.327 I went to the app store and looked for it. 0:06:45.327 --> 0:06:47.487 It got hundreds of thousands of likes and it was 0:06:47.527 --> 0:06:54.447 retweeted thousands of times. I want to ask about cancelation, Amelia, 0:06:54.487 --> 0:06:56.087 Are you a councelor? No? 0:06:56.247 --> 0:06:58.447 And I want to push back a little bit against 0:06:58.447 --> 0:07:01.647 the idea that we're all secret counselors and suggests that 0:07:01.847 --> 0:07:06.687 for people who have little kids, we don't like canceling 0:07:06.807 --> 0:07:11.367 because we hired a babysitter three weeks ago. That's so 0:07:11.407 --> 0:07:14.687 there's a certain group that does not want to cancel. 0:07:15.127 --> 0:07:19.167 And when you canceled on me recently for dinner, let's 0:07:19.167 --> 0:07:20.567 just say I started a voodoo doll. 0:07:21.327 --> 0:07:24.007 Hah. Can I just say you canceled on me that 0:07:24.127 --> 0:07:28.487 same arrangement two weeks before for reasons because of your 0:07:28.527 --> 0:07:31.647 little kids. So I think the common denominator is little 0:07:31.687 --> 0:07:33.607 kids now very selfish ruin your life. 0:07:33.647 --> 0:07:36.407 There is something interesting there, right, because there are some 0:07:36.607 --> 0:07:40.167 plans that feel less sticky, right, that feel like they're 0:07:40.207 --> 0:07:41.567 not really set in stone. I kind of had a 0:07:41.647 --> 0:07:44.167 last minute Sunday night, grand final go to the pub 0:07:44.207 --> 0:07:46.167 thing with a friend and it got to Sunday vo 0:07:46.527 --> 0:07:48.367 and I just couldn't stand up right. I was so 0:07:48.447 --> 0:07:52.287 tired after being away on the long weekend. Ended up canceling. 0:07:52.607 --> 0:07:54.927 He was relieved. It was great that's so true. It's 0:07:54.927 --> 0:07:57.327 like easy into the diary, easy out of the day. Yes, 0:07:57.567 --> 0:08:01.327 Whereas I've had instances lately where I have had a 0:08:01.407 --> 0:08:05.407 really big week, really long day at home with lunar. 0:08:05.967 --> 0:08:10.287 Maybe things have been hard, and that Friday night seven 0:08:10.327 --> 0:08:14.727 o'clock thing is emotionally very very important to me, like 0:08:14.807 --> 0:08:17.327 if I'm feeling really lonely, which you can when you're 0:08:17.327 --> 0:08:20.087 at home with a little kid. Yeah, You've looked forward 0:08:20.127 --> 0:08:22.647 to it all week, and it would break me if 0:08:22.687 --> 0:08:25.287 they canceled. And a few times I've wondered if it's 0:08:25.287 --> 0:08:28.607 appropriate to kind of go, can't cancel this one? Like 0:08:28.647 --> 0:08:32.567 this one here is actually really important because we are 0:08:32.567 --> 0:08:35.567 so flexible with plans, and I find that things are 0:08:35.767 --> 0:08:37.927 canceled more than ever before. I find it with meetings 0:08:37.967 --> 0:08:40.607 at work. I walk into work sometimes and you know 0:08:40.647 --> 0:08:43.567 you're twelve o'clock's done, and this is everything feels kind. 0:08:43.407 --> 0:08:46.647 Of fluid, way moreluid. 0:08:46.007 --> 0:08:48.807 Which I think is maybe a COVID hangover. I still 0:08:48.847 --> 0:08:51.727 think that people are more fluid than before COVID. 0:08:51.807 --> 0:08:54.487 I don't think it's COVID as much. I think it's technology, 0:08:54.527 --> 0:08:58.167 because before you'd make a plan and then you had 0:08:58.207 --> 0:09:00.807 to keep it because you had no way of contacting 0:09:00.807 --> 0:09:04.167 the other person really like you could call them at home, 0:09:04.207 --> 0:09:06.127 but if they have left already. Now you can sort 0:09:06.127 --> 0:09:08.807 of cancel up until an hour before and people do do. 0:09:08.727 --> 0:09:11.647 You think that's appropriate now before? Because I've really had it. 0:09:11.647 --> 0:09:13.567 I've probably had the shower you just. 0:09:13.647 --> 0:09:15.927 Invoked for me a muscle memory of when I was 0:09:15.927 --> 0:09:18.567 a teenager sitting on the steps of Sydney town Hall 0:09:18.647 --> 0:09:21.087 waiting for friends and just assuming that they would show 0:09:21.167 --> 0:09:23.647 up because we discussed this on our landlines a couple 0:09:23.687 --> 0:09:27.647 of days earlier and there was just no ability to cancel. 0:09:27.847 --> 0:09:31.247 Technology has made it easier to cancel than ever before. 0:09:31.607 --> 0:09:34.287 But Mia, do you secretly like cancel plans or is 0:09:34.327 --> 0:09:35.047 this your stick? 0:09:35.287 --> 0:09:36.727 Like? Oh, I love it more than you love that, 0:09:37.127 --> 0:09:39.527 because I think what Sale said was exactly right. There's 0:09:39.527 --> 0:09:43.447 something about being given time back for me. I feel 0:09:44.487 --> 0:09:49.327 so happy when someone cancels on me, even though I 0:09:49.407 --> 0:09:51.647 know if they don't and we actually do the thing, 0:09:52.007 --> 0:09:54.687 I love it. Not to say I wasn't happy when 0:09:54.687 --> 0:09:58.047 you canceled on me because I'd mentally prepared. I was 0:09:58.087 --> 0:10:01.087 wearing the outfit that I wanted to be wearing. I 0:10:01.127 --> 0:10:03.127 wasn't angry at you, but I was disappointed. 0:10:03.287 --> 0:10:06.207 Yeah, it depends on the season. There are seasons when 0:10:06.607 --> 0:10:08.687 like you're in a season right now where you're really 0:10:08.687 --> 0:10:10.327 busy with wor where you get a lot of social 0:10:10.367 --> 0:10:13.727 stimulation from work, and this is maybe the tensions when 0:10:13.767 --> 0:10:16.047 you or your mates are in a different season where 0:10:16.047 --> 0:10:18.847 it's like really really important for you. I once had 0:10:19.007 --> 0:10:21.767 a mate from Mother's group and I had had a 0:10:21.767 --> 0:10:23.647 really rough night or whatever, and Will meant to meet 0:10:23.727 --> 0:10:26.167 up and I just messaged her last minute and I went, look, 0:10:26.207 --> 0:10:27.767 she's got a running nose. I just don't think I 0:10:27.807 --> 0:10:30.087 can do it. And I could tell by her response 0:10:30.687 --> 0:10:33.087 how much they'd been looking forward to it, and I thought, 0:10:33.687 --> 0:10:36.767 you might have actually not seen another adult for weeks. 0:10:36.767 --> 0:10:39.287 We're in that stage where it's like this was the 0:10:39.327 --> 0:10:41.607 thing that was getting you through, that you could sit 0:10:41.647 --> 0:10:43.807 with someone and kind of and anyway, we ended up 0:10:43.807 --> 0:10:45.447 just doing it. I was just like, you know what, 0:10:45.567 --> 0:10:47.047 she's not one hundred percent I'm going to talk around 0:10:47.047 --> 0:10:48.247 the PRAM. We're going to do it. Like I could 0:10:48.247 --> 0:10:50.207 tell from that response, do you know. 0:10:50.287 --> 0:10:55.367 I think a big problem with cancelation for me is 0:10:55.687 --> 0:10:59.727 my morning self will write checks that my evening self 0:10:59.807 --> 0:11:03.287 or afternoon self can't cash. So I've had to make 0:11:03.327 --> 0:11:05.687 a thing because in the morning, I'm my most energetic, 0:11:05.727 --> 0:11:08.767 my most optimistic. If I've gone for if I've done exercise, 0:11:09.247 --> 0:11:13.047 I'll be feeling very energized and loving towards the world. 0:11:13.127 --> 0:11:16.687 I want to see people. But by the afternoon, let 0:11:16.727 --> 0:11:19.887 alone the next week, that'll all be gone and I'll 0:11:19.927 --> 0:11:21.847 be like, oh no. 0:11:22.567 --> 0:11:25.247 There was an article that I read recently called the 0:11:25.327 --> 0:11:28.807 Mainstreaming of Lusidom by a substact called Tell the Bees, 0:11:29.407 --> 0:11:33.007 and she writes about how somehow one of the main 0:11:33.087 --> 0:11:35.927 hobbies that has been accepted by the masses is staying home, 0:11:36.007 --> 0:11:38.287 laying in bed, scrolling on your phone, and watching television. 0:11:38.967 --> 0:11:44.567 And she reflected that every viral meme is about canceling plans, Netflix, 0:11:45.447 --> 0:11:47.967 introversion and hating small talk, like that's. 0:11:47.767 --> 0:11:50.167 Pretty much become like a cool brand. 0:11:50.287 --> 0:11:53.247 Yeah yeah, And she made this interesting comparison to sort 0:11:53.247 --> 0:11:55.647 of twenty years ago, the sex and city girls were 0:11:55.647 --> 0:12:00.047 always partying, they were always out and engaged with lots 0:12:00.087 --> 0:12:03.447 of different people. And if you were someone who didn't 0:12:03.487 --> 0:12:05.767 have friends and you didn't really leave your house, then 0:12:05.807 --> 0:12:09.207 you weren't aspirational, you were weird, and now it's almost 0:12:09.527 --> 0:12:13.127 the opposite. So when Charlie XCX threw this you brat 0:12:13.167 --> 0:12:16.127 summer out, the internet got kind of weird about it 0:12:16.167 --> 0:12:19.967 because they were like, don't force me partying, Like almost 0:12:19.967 --> 0:12:23.847 like she wasn't one of them. Because the I guess 0:12:23.887 --> 0:12:27.847 the dominant Internet culture is that you don't want to 0:12:27.967 --> 0:12:30.807 leave your house, probably because the people who have left 0:12:30.807 --> 0:12:31.967 the house aren't on the Internet. 0:12:32.087 --> 0:12:33.847 Yeah, I agree. I also think that the other thing 0:12:33.887 --> 0:12:37.007 that technology has done is given us a lot of 0:12:37.047 --> 0:12:39.407 social nourishment through our phone. Now it's not the same 0:12:39.407 --> 0:12:41.527 as seeing people, but once upon a time, if you 0:12:41.607 --> 0:12:44.567 wanted to socialize, you had to leave your house by definition. 0:12:45.047 --> 0:12:47.927 Now you can do a whole lot of socializing. Admittedly 0:12:48.727 --> 0:12:51.247 it's a different kind. But even though you and I 0:12:51.287 --> 0:12:55.007 haven't had dinner for a while, we're still very connected 0:12:55.007 --> 0:12:58.847 because we message all day every day, and so you 0:12:58.887 --> 0:13:02.087 can stay in touch with people in that way. But 0:13:02.127 --> 0:13:05.967 there's also the politics of canceled plans, because if you're 0:13:06.007 --> 0:13:09.527 with a group and one person cancels, does the plan 0:13:09.607 --> 0:13:14.127 go ahead or do you all agree to redo it? 0:13:14.167 --> 0:13:16.127 And my view is that if the person who canceled 0:13:16.167 --> 0:13:18.647 is then responsible for making the event happen because they 0:13:18.647 --> 0:13:20.727 fucked it. I don't know, Like, if you've got a 0:13:20.767 --> 0:13:22.407 group of people, I know we've talked about this before 0:13:22.407 --> 0:13:24.327 and one cancels, what do you do. 0:13:24.887 --> 0:13:27.847 I also want to put forward that with different friendships, 0:13:27.927 --> 0:13:31.567 you have a bank account of cancelation crate. Agree, And 0:13:31.807 --> 0:13:34.487 speaking as someone who's trying to make new friends because 0:13:34.527 --> 0:13:38.527 I just moved here, I've realized that having made a 0:13:38.527 --> 0:13:41.887 plan with a new friend, you cannot. 0:13:43.087 --> 0:13:44.447 You've got to earn a cancelation. 0:13:44.487 --> 0:13:48.047 You've got to earn it. And certain friendships can withstand it. 0:13:48.087 --> 0:13:50.887 And I actually think jokes aside as absolutely can here 0:13:50.887 --> 0:13:52.487 because we know we're just always going to meet each 0:13:52.487 --> 0:13:55.207 other on WhatsApp. But there are other friendships where you're 0:13:55.247 --> 0:13:59.407 aware that your cancelation credits are either low or non existence, 0:13:59.487 --> 0:14:02.127 and that happens sometimes, particularly with new friends. 0:14:02.447 --> 0:14:07.487 I reckon I've had friendships end or friendships really fizzle 0:14:07.567 --> 0:14:11.087 out because I used my canceled. 0:14:11.487 --> 0:14:12.727 Yeah, then you just become the flake. 0:14:12.927 --> 0:14:15.247 Then you become someone who's flaking and unreliable, which are 0:14:15.247 --> 0:14:16.327 absolutely and. 0:14:17.047 --> 0:14:19.247 For someone who's shopping for a new friend, they need 0:14:19.287 --> 0:14:20.767 to see that you're reliable. 0:14:21.007 --> 0:14:21.927 Yeah, exactly right. 0:14:22.167 --> 0:14:24.567 It's interesting because it's not just friendship groups that are 0:14:24.567 --> 0:14:27.487 bailing on commitments, it's also the job market. Forbes released 0:14:27.487 --> 0:14:31.767 a piece titled job Ghosting, Why employer's ghost candidates during 0:14:31.807 --> 0:14:36.327 the interview process. It talks about how job ghosting refers 0:14:36.327 --> 0:14:39.847 to the practice as suddenly ceasing all communication with a 0:14:39.927 --> 0:14:42.487 candidate in the hope that the applicant will get the 0:14:42.567 --> 0:14:45.407 hint that they're no longer being considered for the position, 0:14:45.487 --> 0:14:48.367 as opposed to the human resource professional or hiring manager 0:14:48.767 --> 0:14:50.607 simply telling them that they're out of the running. 0:14:50.847 --> 0:14:51.887 That is so bad. 0:14:51.967 --> 0:14:52.767 It's so rude. 0:14:52.847 --> 0:14:55.287 It's so so rude. And it's also like you better 0:14:55.367 --> 0:14:58.127 not want to ever hire that person, because if in 0:14:58.167 --> 0:15:00.167 six months or twelve months a position comes up in 0:15:00.207 --> 0:15:02.047 that person would have been perfect, well, then you've really 0:15:02.087 --> 0:15:02.607 burned them. 0:15:02.647 --> 0:15:04.567 Sometimes it'll go the other way as well. I've been 0:15:04.607 --> 0:15:07.327 in situations where I've had conversations with people about jobs 0:15:07.647 --> 0:15:10.207 and they've been like yeah, yeah, yeah, nay, just ghoest you. 0:15:10.887 --> 0:15:11.367 Yeah. 0:15:11.407 --> 0:15:16.047 So it's this idea that being unreliable is not something 0:15:16.047 --> 0:15:20.407 that people are worried about being seen as do you think. 0:15:20.327 --> 0:15:23.367 Yeah, I wonder if it's like again a post COVID thing. 0:15:23.607 --> 0:15:26.527 I mean, I can't imagine why employers think that that's okay. 0:15:26.607 --> 0:15:30.007 I remember whenever I've been applying for a job, I've 0:15:30.007 --> 0:15:32.487 always received word about what happened. And when I've been 0:15:32.567 --> 0:15:34.487 hiring for a job, I always try and reach out 0:15:34.527 --> 0:15:36.647 to people. Now they will sometimes come back to me 0:15:36.727 --> 0:15:38.647 and they will say why didn't I get the job? 0:15:39.207 --> 0:15:41.647 And I don't find it helpful to go into detail 0:15:41.687 --> 0:15:43.527 at that point. It's not my job to be their 0:15:43.527 --> 0:15:46.207 career coach, and I sort of draw a line. But 0:15:46.287 --> 0:15:47.407 I think it's very what do you say? 0:15:47.447 --> 0:15:48.447 Literally? What do you say? 0:15:48.647 --> 0:15:51.367 I just say there are a lot of competitive candidates 0:15:51.887 --> 0:15:53.967 and just shut it down. But I think it's very 0:15:54.007 --> 0:15:55.207 important to be clear. 0:15:55.127 --> 0:15:57.367 When you just don't get the call anymore. I feel 0:15:57.407 --> 0:15:59.647 I know the word is overused, but I feel triggered 0:15:59.647 --> 0:16:01.687 because I feel like I'm being romantically ghosted. 0:16:02.087 --> 0:16:04.127 I feel that the rules of to bring it back 0:16:04.127 --> 0:16:07.967 to cancelation. When you cancel a plan, the onus is 0:16:07.967 --> 0:16:11.567 on you to then reinstate the plan, which makes me realize, 0:16:11.727 --> 0:16:13.287 have we got a dinner in the diary? 0:16:15.527 --> 0:16:15.767 Baby? 0:16:17.847 --> 0:16:23.247 Do you believe that cancel them. 0:16:23.487 --> 0:16:25.687 It's Friday, so we want to help set up your 0:16:25.727 --> 0:16:29.847 weekend with our best recommendations. May I you can go first. Please. 0:16:30.047 --> 0:16:34.567 My recommendation is very is the word prosaic, which is 0:16:34.607 --> 0:16:37.687 what basic small? What does prosaic mean? 0:16:37.887 --> 0:16:41.567 I didn't think that's what like very very every day? 0:16:41.767 --> 0:16:42.527 Yes, that's what. 0:16:42.607 --> 0:16:43.527 It's actually quite good. 0:16:43.687 --> 0:16:45.687 Correctly use the word, even though I couldn't define it. 0:16:46.287 --> 0:16:50.167 I did a guest episode on Nothing to Wear, our 0:16:50.167 --> 0:16:52.207 fashion podcast with Lee Campbell this week, and we were 0:16:52.207 --> 0:16:56.327 talking about Lee's travel tips. She's just come back from overseas. 0:16:56.367 --> 0:16:59.847 She's got the most extraordinary travel tips, and one of 0:16:59.887 --> 0:17:03.207 the things that she told me about were hanger extenders. 0:17:03.447 --> 0:17:05.967 They're these little things that are like, I don't know, 0:17:06.007 --> 0:17:08.327 they're the size of your thumb, a little plastic thing. 0:17:08.927 --> 0:17:12.487 We put a photo in the out Louder's newsletter this week. 0:17:12.527 --> 0:17:14.927 But what it means is that you can, if you've 0:17:14.927 --> 0:17:17.687 got limited hanging space in your wardrobe, and who doesn't, 0:17:18.167 --> 0:17:22.247 you can hang your clothes like vertically, get down so 0:17:22.287 --> 0:17:25.727 each hanger can hang off the hanger above it. Yes, 0:17:26.127 --> 0:17:28.247 you just get them from Amazon. They're super cheap. She 0:17:28.287 --> 0:17:31.047 also says she uses them. She takes them traveling. Ok, 0:17:31.207 --> 0:17:33.767 why you take them traveling? But she said she uses 0:17:33.767 --> 0:17:36.967 it for planning outfits. That might not be something that 0:17:37.007 --> 0:17:38.647 you two do, but I do it all the time, 0:17:38.687 --> 0:17:40.167 and I do it on my floor, and the problem 0:17:40.167 --> 0:17:41.687 with that is that my dog come and lie on 0:17:41.767 --> 0:17:45.967 it or sometimes shit on it quite literally, So better 0:17:46.087 --> 0:17:48.247 I hang it up and it sort of layers them 0:17:48.807 --> 0:17:51.487 in a little line, which I think is really cool. Anyway, 0:17:51.927 --> 0:17:53.567 hanger extenders who knew. 0:17:53.687 --> 0:17:57.927 My recommendation is a really uninspired one because it is 0:17:58.087 --> 0:18:00.367 a book that Holly has already recommended. It is called 0:18:00.407 --> 0:18:02.807 French Braid. I loved it. Not a single thing happens, 0:18:02.887 --> 0:18:05.207 and that is why I am going to throw to 0:18:05.247 --> 0:18:08.407 a Milia who has enough recommendations to sustain a small tripe. 0:18:08.447 --> 0:18:11.207 Just wait for a second. I think I read that 0:18:11.247 --> 0:18:14.007 after Holly recommended it. Yeah, is this the one where 0:18:14.047 --> 0:18:19.047 she moves into There's no spoiler alerts because she's a 0:18:19.167 --> 0:18:21.767 married woman in her forties or fifties or maybe even sixties, 0:18:21.767 --> 0:18:23.127 and she gets like a studio. 0:18:22.847 --> 0:18:26.447 And yeah, so basically she has this family and it's 0:18:26.487 --> 0:18:29.247 I love books that span generations. I just find them 0:18:29.327 --> 0:18:32.247 very satisfying. So like it begins and she gets married 0:18:32.287 --> 0:18:34.967 and she has these kids, and then when her last 0:18:35.047 --> 0:18:39.207 kid moves out, she basically goes to this garage where 0:18:39.327 --> 0:18:42.007 to paint. She's not a very good painter, but she 0:18:42.087 --> 0:18:44.567 just refuses to care for anyone or anything. And then 0:18:44.567 --> 0:18:46.567 someone tries to give her a cat at one point, 0:18:46.647 --> 0:18:48.647 and she and she's just like, I don't want to 0:18:48.647 --> 0:18:49.807 look after a cat. 0:18:49.887 --> 0:18:53.647 She quite quits her not just her marriage, but her family, 0:18:53.847 --> 0:18:56.247 really her responsibility. She quite quits. 0:18:56.047 --> 0:18:57.527 It's a really. 0:18:57.327 --> 0:18:59.447 Gentle It's a gentle book, isn't it. But it's good. 0:18:59.327 --> 0:19:02.927 Analysis of motherhood and family. 0:19:02.927 --> 0:19:04.647 And connection burden. 0:19:04.967 --> 0:19:09.567 Yeah, I really really enjoyed it, Amelia, What have you 0:19:09.647 --> 0:19:11.847 been watching, reading doing? 0:19:12.087 --> 0:19:14.447 Okay? I just wanted to run with this opportunity to 0:19:14.487 --> 0:19:17.207 recommend a bunch of things. I'm gonna start with Ana 0:19:17.327 --> 0:19:20.527 Garten's memoir. Now do you even know who Anna Garten is? 0:19:20.607 --> 0:19:23.367 I keep hearing about Ana Garten and I don't know. 0:19:23.607 --> 0:19:24.407 I never get a name. 0:19:24.527 --> 0:19:26.767 Aina Garten confused with Ara Glass, who is the host 0:19:26.807 --> 0:19:29.327 of this American Life podcast. But they're different people. 0:19:29.607 --> 0:19:32.487 So Ana Garten I knew nothing about her. I just 0:19:32.567 --> 0:19:36.167 knew that my husband loves cooking her roast chicken recipe, 0:19:36.807 --> 0:19:40.727 and that she has a famously good marriage. Everyone talks 0:19:40.727 --> 0:19:43.807 about her marriage. She's a guy named Jeffrey's American. She's 0:19:43.847 --> 0:19:46.247 an American cookbook writer. I should have left. 0:19:46.487 --> 0:19:50.967 But like Julia Child, or like Nigella Lawson, or like. 0:19:51.727 --> 0:19:55.407 Sort of somewhere in between, Like she's got the kind 0:19:55.407 --> 0:19:59.447 of Julia Child's old school approach, but she does have 0:19:59.527 --> 0:20:03.367 the sort of like sexiness of a Nigella, So she's 0:20:03.447 --> 0:20:07.207 sort of she's in her seventies. But people kept talking 0:20:07.207 --> 0:20:08.967 about her memoir that's just come out. It's called b 0:20:09.527 --> 0:20:11.927 When the Luck Happens, which is a great title. I 0:20:11.927 --> 0:20:14.327 think I just thought i'd start listening to it on 0:20:14.367 --> 0:20:16.927 a road trip this past weekend. She reads it. She 0:20:16.927 --> 0:20:19.807 has a lovely voice, and as it happens, the book 0:20:19.887 --> 0:20:22.247 is a lot about her marriage and about what makes 0:20:22.287 --> 0:20:25.047 real good partnership. Jeffrey, her husband, is always sort of 0:20:25.087 --> 0:20:27.807 popping in on her Food Network show. She talks about 0:20:27.807 --> 0:20:30.647 how much she enjoys her recipes. So everyone knows about Jeffrey, 0:20:31.127 --> 0:20:32.847 and the book is very much about the pull and 0:20:32.887 --> 0:20:37.087 push involved when two ambitious people get married or get together. 0:20:37.247 --> 0:20:39.767 So they got married in nineteen sixty eight, and there's 0:20:39.767 --> 0:20:42.367 some tough moments for their marriage, and she's pretty honest 0:20:42.407 --> 0:20:45.287 about all of that. Jeffrey, he's a professor. What I 0:20:45.327 --> 0:20:46.967 didn't expect to get out of this is that it's 0:20:46.967 --> 0:20:49.767 a masterclass in how to make big, risky life decisions. 0:20:49.847 --> 0:20:53.167 Because at thirty Aina quit this really important job at 0:20:53.207 --> 0:20:55.847 the White House. She worked on nuclear policy, and her 0:20:55.887 --> 0:20:58.887 husband also worked in Washington, DC on government stuff, and 0:20:58.927 --> 0:21:01.247 then she opened a gourmet food shop in New York 0:21:01.287 --> 0:21:03.407 called The Barefoot Contessa, which you may have. 0:21:03.567 --> 0:21:05.207 Yes, I've heard of that. I think that was made 0:21:05.247 --> 0:21:05.887 into a TV. 0:21:05.807 --> 0:21:08.127 She was made into a TV show and she's a 0:21:08.127 --> 0:21:10.887 whole brand empire now. But at the time that was 0:21:10.887 --> 0:21:13.927 a really impulsive and wild choice, and I loved hearing 0:21:14.087 --> 0:21:17.687 her sort of thinking through that really crazy choice at 0:21:17.687 --> 0:21:20.447 the age of thirty and how you think about making 0:21:20.487 --> 0:21:22.767 a big leap in your life. She talks about Jeffrey's 0:21:22.807 --> 0:21:25.087 advice as being do what you love. If you love it, 0:21:25.207 --> 0:21:27.807 you'll be very good at it. So that's a kind 0:21:27.847 --> 0:21:28.807 of heartwarming read. 0:21:29.087 --> 0:21:29.767 Oh I love that. 0:21:29.927 --> 0:21:33.687 What is not heartwarming but really interesting. Have you watched 0:21:33.807 --> 0:21:36.607 Australian's Story, the three part series about Lochlan Murdock. 0:21:36.967 --> 0:21:40.127 Everyone has told me I need to love this so good. 0:21:40.167 --> 0:21:43.287 My hairdresser told me that it's literally all anyone wants 0:21:43.327 --> 0:21:44.087 to talk about me. 0:21:44.167 --> 0:21:49.167 Really, everyone sort of likes the idea of a soap 0:21:49.207 --> 0:21:53.007 opera and the reality is really not that we actually 0:21:53.087 --> 0:21:54.527 are a very close family. 0:21:54.527 --> 0:21:56.767 I love my brothers, I love my sisters. 0:21:56.927 --> 0:21:58.047 We're normal family. 0:21:58.807 --> 0:22:00.847 We just have a bit of a spotlight on. 0:22:03.047 --> 0:22:06.287 I think that all of Murdoch's children, their stories are 0:22:06.287 --> 0:22:10.967 about proving themselves to their father. Lachlan's story is the 0:22:11.047 --> 0:22:14.407 happiest story. All Lachlan had to do to prove himself 0:22:14.607 --> 0:22:16.847 to his father was to be Lachlin, to be adoring, 0:22:17.287 --> 0:22:19.647 to see the world the same way Rupert did. That 0:22:19.807 --> 0:22:22.167 was Lachlan's face in the Hall in the Succession Fate. 0:22:22.367 --> 0:22:24.367 So obviously we all know who Rupert Murdock is, but 0:22:24.607 --> 0:22:26.567 I love following his personal life. 0:22:26.607 --> 0:22:27.287 I always have. 0:22:27.527 --> 0:22:31.167 For instance, my personal Roman Empire is the fact that 0:22:31.287 --> 0:22:34.287 when Rupert Murdoch broke up with Jerry Hall, as you remember, 0:22:35.007 --> 0:22:37.927 it happened so suddenly and so out of the blue 0:22:37.967 --> 0:22:40.487 that she had to call her ex Mick Jagger to 0:22:40.567 --> 0:22:42.847 help her pack up and leave Rupert's mansion because he 0:22:42.887 --> 0:22:43.487 said get out. 0:22:43.887 --> 0:22:45.367 Oh well I didn't know that. 0:22:45.487 --> 0:22:48.047 Well you know what Mick had to do. He had 0:22:48.087 --> 0:22:53.127 to come and remove all the CCTV cameras and de 0:22:53.807 --> 0:22:55.207 security it. 0:22:55.727 --> 0:22:56.287 Wow. 0:22:56.567 --> 0:22:58.887 Yes, because he knows a few things about that. 0:22:59.367 --> 0:23:03.607 Yeah, right, So is dumb question? Is Lachlan the heir? 0:23:04.207 --> 0:23:06.727 Yes, so Lachlan's the favorite son and he's going to 0:23:06.767 --> 0:23:10.727 inherit Rupert's media empire, so he's he's from me, that's 0:23:10.727 --> 0:23:14.327 from secession. The problem is that Lachlan's siblings, Elizabeth and James, 0:23:14.367 --> 0:23:18.367 appear to hate both Lachlan and this plan, so they 0:23:18.447 --> 0:23:20.047 are currently has many siblings. 0:23:20.087 --> 0:23:23.607 He's also got an older sister, Prue, by Rupert's first marriage, 0:23:23.847 --> 0:23:27.967 and two younger sisters by Wendy Deng. Yes, but they're 0:23:28.007 --> 0:23:30.407 not part of the trust, so it was essentially left 0:23:30.967 --> 0:23:35.847 to the four eldest Murdoch children. When he got divorced 0:23:35.847 --> 0:23:40.927 from Lachlan, James and Elizabeth's mother, Anna Murdoch, she made 0:23:40.967 --> 0:23:43.647 sure that the trust gave all four of them, including Prue, 0:23:43.647 --> 0:23:46.287 who is a stepdaughter, an equal share, and when the 0:23:46.327 --> 0:23:49.447 new ones came along, they don't get voting rights. They 0:23:49.487 --> 0:23:51.407 get a share, but they don't get voting rights. And 0:23:51.447 --> 0:23:55.767 so what's interesting now is after he's just married for 0:23:55.807 --> 0:23:59.367 the fifth time at the age of ninety three, there's 0:23:59.407 --> 0:24:02.767 been a court case going on recently where Rupert Murdoch 0:24:02.807 --> 0:24:06.527 has argued that only Lachlan should get to decide what 0:24:06.647 --> 0:24:10.487 happens to the company and not the others, because he 0:24:10.527 --> 0:24:15.247 says that the others, who are famously less conservative than Lachlan, 0:24:15.287 --> 0:24:18.047 who's said to be more right wing than Rupert, that 0:24:18.087 --> 0:24:21.367 they'll destroy Fox News because they might either take it 0:24:21.407 --> 0:24:23.087 further to the left or make it more moderate, or 0:24:23.087 --> 0:24:25.087 make it, I don't know, stop saying the things that 0:24:25.127 --> 0:24:27.807 it does. And so he's essentially gone to court to 0:24:27.927 --> 0:24:31.767 argue that three of his children are incapable of running 0:24:31.807 --> 0:24:34.967 the business and will lose all the value of the company, 0:24:35.007 --> 0:24:37.007 and that Lachlan has to be the only one and 0:24:37.047 --> 0:24:41.887 so the three elder than the united in fighting. It's 0:24:41.927 --> 0:24:44.727 Lachlan and Rupert against the other three siblings. 0:24:44.967 --> 0:24:47.527 It's Extrame's what the Australian story is about. 0:24:47.567 --> 0:24:49.287 The end part of it is, Yeah, that's kind of 0:24:49.367 --> 0:24:51.127 runs all the way through, and that court case hasn't 0:24:51.127 --> 0:24:53.527 been decided yet, but it's with the backdrop of all 0:24:53.527 --> 0:24:56.487 of that, and James Packer speaks about Lachlan and there's 0:24:56.647 --> 0:24:59.487 like old interview footage of Lachlan. I've taken over your recommendation. 0:24:59.527 --> 0:25:01.607 No, it's great. James Tracker was a highlight for me 0:25:01.727 --> 0:25:04.807 because Lachlan doesn't speak, but he and James are closed 0:25:04.847 --> 0:25:06.327 and you have to assume that he gave the green 0:25:06.407 --> 0:25:09.807 light to it. James comes across as very vulnerable, honest 0:25:09.887 --> 0:25:11.807 about their failed business ventures together. 0:25:12.327 --> 0:25:15.207 So that's on IVIEWBCA iView if you want to watch that. 0:25:15.287 --> 0:25:18.167 It's three parts. It's so fascinating. Okay, the next one 0:25:18.207 --> 0:25:21.367 is more prosaic. It's a recommendation for all my elder 0:25:21.447 --> 0:25:24.527 millennials out there. This term was coined, of course, by 0:25:24.647 --> 0:25:28.767 comedian Eliza Schlessinger. I can never I like your stand up. 0:25:28.967 --> 0:25:31.247 She does good stand up. Yeah, and she, like me, 0:25:31.447 --> 0:25:33.767 was born in the early to mid eighties. Okay, So 0:25:33.927 --> 0:25:36.287 for all of us who meet that criteria, I have 0:25:36.367 --> 0:25:39.847 some bad news, which is scientists have discovered that as 0:25:39.887 --> 0:25:43.127 your face ages, you lose contrast. Did you know this? 0:25:43.407 --> 0:25:45.567 I did know this because I'm a gen X and 0:25:45.607 --> 0:25:48.047 my eyebrows disappeared. Have you seen my drivers? 0:25:48.527 --> 0:25:49.967 What do you mean by you lose contract? 0:25:50.047 --> 0:25:53.087 So your lips, eyes, and your eyebrows get paler, and 0:25:53.127 --> 0:25:56.967 then surrounding skin gets darker, and so the result is 0:25:57.007 --> 0:25:58.367 just a wash of pale. 0:25:58.527 --> 0:26:01.367 What about your nipples, Well, you could put some lippy 0:26:01.367 --> 0:26:03.727 on them. I suppose this is why makeup wasn't so 0:26:03.887 --> 0:26:08.127 lavier changes color. There you go, Friday, it's another recommendation. 0:26:08.967 --> 0:26:11.567 Make tap was invented to make us literally look younger 0:26:11.567 --> 0:26:14.407 by adding color to our face. So applying this logic, 0:26:14.687 --> 0:26:16.807 I gave my brows some love for the first time 0:26:16.847 --> 0:26:19.407 in many years, and I got a brow tint. And 0:26:19.447 --> 0:26:21.727 I'd always been scared of them because I do have 0:26:21.807 --> 0:26:23.967 pale features, and I thought I'd look like John Howard. 0:26:24.167 --> 0:26:26.327 Yeah, but I don't think that I do. You joine 0:26:26.327 --> 0:26:28.207 it all? So we have someone who comes into them 0:26:28.207 --> 0:26:30.527 a mer office pretty often these days, because there's so 0:26:30.527 --> 0:26:32.887 many people who want to get their brows done, and 0:26:33.327 --> 0:26:35.927 everyone gets their brows done, and it's such a used 0:26:35.927 --> 0:26:37.767 to happen in the kitchen, and so to be sitting 0:26:37.767 --> 0:26:40.647 there with their brows done, yea, I do right at home? Yeah, 0:26:40.727 --> 0:26:42.207 what a chemist kit. 0:26:42.447 --> 0:26:44.927 I would say it's particularly good about your eyebrows, Amelia, 0:26:45.007 --> 0:26:46.567 is that what you have gone for is a cooler 0:26:46.647 --> 0:26:49.367 home and it really suits your features. So when mine 0:26:49.367 --> 0:26:52.127 has gone wrong is they've they've done quite a warm 0:26:52.207 --> 0:26:55.847 blonde and it almost can go a little bit orange 0:26:55.967 --> 0:26:58.047 or something that doesn't work. And now they do a 0:26:58.047 --> 0:26:59.647 little And when I do it at home, I do 0:26:59.727 --> 0:27:01.287 a brown, and I do just a little bit of 0:27:01.327 --> 0:27:02.567 black and it cools the hole. 0:27:02.847 --> 0:27:04.487 So that's a very good point. I think you could 0:27:04.487 --> 0:27:07.007 go a little darker. Yeah, I do. And as you 0:27:07.087 --> 0:27:09.047 know what else I've been doing. I've got a product 0:27:09.087 --> 0:27:11.607 that I bought I think two faces. It's called fluff 0:27:11.607 --> 0:27:14.407 and hold. It's like a because I have never done 0:27:14.407 --> 0:27:17.327 the laminating thing that feels I think it's over so 0:27:17.487 --> 0:27:20.527 but you can sort of brush them up. Yeah, I've 0:27:20.527 --> 0:27:23.367 had to do a lot more eyebrown maintenance as I've 0:27:23.407 --> 0:27:26.607 got older. I did think about having like tattooing yep 0:27:26.767 --> 0:27:28.407 or something, or a transfer. 0:27:28.447 --> 0:27:29.327 I'm not quite ready. 0:27:29.407 --> 0:27:31.767 I can't be bothered a transplant. Yeah, you can have 0:27:31.767 --> 0:27:32.367 a transplant. 0:27:32.407 --> 0:27:36.887 Wow. The Wonders of Modern Science. Final recommendation only murders 0:27:36.927 --> 0:27:37.887 in the building. 0:27:38.127 --> 0:27:42.327 Or only murders in the building. I'm Charles Hay. 0:27:43.127 --> 0:27:47.487 What the hell didn't Savage? You can just splice that 0:27:47.567 --> 0:27:48.567 onto the Charles Hay. 0:27:49.247 --> 0:27:53.007 Yeah, I'll get out the splicer Hollywood studio. 0:27:53.087 --> 0:27:55.167 I wanted to make a movie of our podcast. 0:27:55.487 --> 0:27:56.727 The script is amazing. 0:27:56.887 --> 0:28:00.167 Oliver flits around the room, accepted genarian Peter Pan or 0:28:00.207 --> 0:28:01.367 a male tinker Bell. 0:28:01.607 --> 0:28:05.887 I do not walk that way again. This is one 0:28:05.887 --> 0:28:07.807 that I have heard so much about and I haven't 0:28:07.807 --> 0:28:11.367 watched it yet, so no, okay, so everyone loves it. 0:28:11.447 --> 0:28:13.087 I'm glad that you mentioned that, because when I heard 0:28:13.087 --> 0:28:15.407 the premise, I thought the same thing. The premise is 0:28:15.407 --> 0:28:18.887 that these two seventy something comedians Martin Short Steve Martin 0:28:19.527 --> 0:28:23.487 act in a show about a true crime podcast moment Dick. Yeah, 0:28:23.487 --> 0:28:26.447 and it just felt really silly. But the best way 0:28:26.447 --> 0:28:28.607 you can describe it is it's kind of like putting 0:28:28.607 --> 0:28:34.327 on your coziest, warmest orange jumper, okay, and sort of 0:28:34.367 --> 0:28:37.527 sipping a hot chop. It's polar fleece. It's polar fleece 0:28:37.567 --> 0:28:40.287 in a show. It's really cozy. It's set in a 0:28:40.327 --> 0:28:43.407 New York apartment building where it's always the autumn and 0:28:43.487 --> 0:28:46.087 the new season has Paul Rudd and Eva Longoria in it, 0:28:46.167 --> 0:28:48.807 and this will be interesting. There's an on screen romance 0:28:48.847 --> 0:28:50.967 between Martin Short and Meryl Streep and I don't know 0:28:50.967 --> 0:28:51.927 if you've seen the. 0:28:51.927 --> 0:28:54.567 Picks, something's going on there and he's. 0:28:54.487 --> 0:28:56.207 Going on in real life between those two. 0:28:56.287 --> 0:28:58.687 Yeap mark my words, they are together. 0:28:58.527 --> 0:29:02.847 Disney So links to all of our recommendations. Are you 0:29:02.927 --> 0:29:05.847 signed up to Muma mer out Loud the newsletter because 0:29:05.887 --> 0:29:08.127 you can get our recos there and more than that, 0:29:08.927 --> 0:29:12.167 there's so much in that newsletter and it's free, so 0:29:12.687 --> 0:29:14.487 that's a little treat for the weekend. There will be 0:29:14.567 --> 0:29:16.287 a link in the show notes to get that. 0:29:18.047 --> 0:29:22.007 One unlimited out loud access. We drop episodes every Tuesday 0:29:22.007 --> 0:29:26.527 and Thursday exclusively for Muma Maya subscribers. Follow the link 0:29:26.567 --> 0:29:28.567 in the show notes to get us in your ears 0:29:28.647 --> 0:29:31.247 five days a week. And a huge thank you to 0:29:31.327 --> 0:29:42.287 all our current subscribers. 0:29:43.527 --> 0:29:45.727 Now it's time for our best Worst of the week, 0:29:45.967 --> 0:29:47.567 which is the part of the show where we share 0:29:47.567 --> 0:29:50.967 a little more from our personal lives. Jesse, I'd like 0:29:51.047 --> 0:29:54.367 you to go first. What is your worst of the week? 0:29:54.847 --> 0:29:58.847 My worst was day one of our long weekend holiday 0:29:59.287 --> 0:30:02.207 so we went to the coast. I don't know if 0:30:02.207 --> 0:30:04.007 it was up or down, but it was alonger road 0:30:04.047 --> 0:30:04.927 and we ended up. 0:30:04.807 --> 0:30:06.007 At the coast near the beach. 0:30:06.167 --> 0:30:08.247 Near the beach, Luca went up a day early, and 0:30:08.287 --> 0:30:11.407 then I went with Luna. Now I have a spreadsheet 0:30:11.527 --> 0:30:13.207 with or do you have this, Amelia for when you 0:30:13.247 --> 0:30:15.087 go away with the like with all the things. 0:30:15.167 --> 0:30:16.847 About of haphazard notes up here? 0:30:16.967 --> 0:30:18.887 Yeah, okay, so I have an actual spreadsheet. 0:30:19.007 --> 0:30:20.847 Why does it need to be in a spreadsheet form? 0:30:20.927 --> 0:30:23.487 Because I need to make it green when I've packed it, 0:30:23.767 --> 0:30:25.687 and I need it not to disappear because all my 0:30:25.767 --> 0:30:28.847 other do you really just have a list, because then 0:30:28.887 --> 0:30:30.207 I would either cross it off or and then I 0:30:30.247 --> 0:30:32.247 would lose it. But I need to use it again 0:30:32.287 --> 0:30:33.487 and again every time we go away. 0:30:33.607 --> 0:30:35.647 Oh I see, you know what I mean. I get it. 0:30:35.687 --> 0:30:38.007 So I've got my spreadsheet of Luna sings. 0:30:38.247 --> 0:30:40.567 And have you ever seen this organized side of you before? 0:30:40.647 --> 0:30:42.847 It's because I have that mind issue where I can't 0:30:42.887 --> 0:30:45.167 visualize things. We've talked about it. 0:30:45.127 --> 0:30:47.207 On that do you know she's got that Amelia new 0:30:47.247 --> 0:30:50.967 out louder Is to the show. Jesse is different in 0:30:51.047 --> 0:30:55.927 her brain and if you say, imagine Luna. She can't 0:30:56.047 --> 0:30:57.407 picture face, do you? 0:30:57.447 --> 0:30:59.647 Okay? So if I say to you, Amelia, can you 0:30:59.647 --> 0:31:01.487 see an apple in your mind's eye? Can you see 0:31:01.487 --> 0:31:01.887 an apple? 0:31:01.967 --> 0:31:02.167 Yeah? 0:31:02.247 --> 0:31:04.207 Okay, I can't. So this is why I can't. 0:31:04.247 --> 0:31:04.967 What do you see? 0:31:05.087 --> 0:31:06.167 Nothing? The word apple? 0:31:06.247 --> 0:31:07.847 When I say Luna, what do you see? 0:31:08.087 --> 0:31:10.887 I can't see Luna's face. I know memory wise what 0:31:10.927 --> 0:31:13.327 her features and stuff are. Tonight I had to come 0:31:13.367 --> 0:31:14.847 to work and I had to pack an outfit for 0:31:14.887 --> 0:31:17.367 tonight because I have another event. It killed me because 0:31:17.367 --> 0:31:18.327 I can't see. 0:31:18.247 --> 0:31:20.967 The Oh that's why dressed is hard for you. 0:31:21.247 --> 0:31:22.687 It's called a fantasia. 0:31:23.487 --> 0:31:25.167 And did you get it like diagnosed? 0:31:25.407 --> 0:31:27.487 No, it is something that I read about once. Ande's like, 0:31:27.527 --> 0:31:29.487 oh my god, I have that just clear have it? No, 0:31:29.567 --> 0:31:29.967 she doesn't. 0:31:30.407 --> 0:31:32.847 But can I just ask what's your number one thing 0:31:32.927 --> 0:31:35.127 that you're terrified that you'll forget? Because for me, it 0:31:35.247 --> 0:31:37.007 used to be a white noise machine. 0:31:37.327 --> 0:31:40.007 For me, it's a dummy because she wouldn't sleep, like 0:31:40.167 --> 0:31:41.927 she needs a dummy to go to sleep, and so 0:31:42.007 --> 0:31:44.487 it's just all of those little things, or like we 0:31:44.567 --> 0:31:46.247 had a little portable high chair. What do you do 0:31:46.287 --> 0:31:47.527 if you don't have a high chair for a fifteen 0:31:47.527 --> 0:31:49.967 month old. So the car filled to the brim. We 0:31:50.087 --> 0:31:53.567 get there, we unpack everything, and Luna is shitty. She 0:31:53.567 --> 0:31:56.367 doesn't want to be there. She's whinging, she winges at 0:31:56.407 --> 0:31:59.447 meal times, she has to be held all the time. Terrible, 0:31:59.527 --> 0:32:01.607 terrible mood. And you start going as a te thing. 0:32:01.647 --> 0:32:02.487 Is she constipated? 0:32:02.607 --> 0:32:02.767 Is she? 0:32:03.287 --> 0:32:05.407 And then you go, there's been all this effort and 0:32:05.407 --> 0:32:06.527 we're there with a bunch of friends. 0:32:06.607 --> 0:32:10.127 Oh that's awful, and this is yeah. Everyone's like, oh, 0:32:10.167 --> 0:32:11.887 maybe it's and you're just like, I just need to 0:32:11.887 --> 0:32:13.687 deal with it. It's worse if I have to also 0:32:13.767 --> 0:32:14.647 talk about it. Do you know? 0:32:14.687 --> 0:32:16.647 I have this weird thing where I don't like to 0:32:16.727 --> 0:32:21.727 socialize with my children because I can't multitask making sure 0:32:22.047 --> 0:32:24.487 and solving their problems and having a good conversation. 0:32:24.607 --> 0:32:27.287 I was very unsatisfying the one time that we socialized 0:32:27.327 --> 0:32:30.287 with your children, I didn't like it. They're very cute. 0:32:30.567 --> 0:32:33.207 It's really really hard because you also then have Luna 0:32:33.207 --> 0:32:35.287 can be very shy, so she gets shy around people, 0:32:35.287 --> 0:32:37.647 and then I feel guilty that she's not anywhere. It's hard. 0:32:38.047 --> 0:32:40.727 So day one total ride off and I just went 0:32:40.767 --> 0:32:42.287 all right, So this long weekend's going to be a 0:32:42.287 --> 0:32:43.727 slog It's going to be one of those holidays we 0:32:43.727 --> 0:32:46.607 look back on and go that was no fun. The 0:32:46.647 --> 0:32:50.047 next day we woke up and I had an angel. 0:32:50.247 --> 0:32:52.247 She was an absolute angel. This was my best is. 0:32:52.287 --> 0:32:54.607 She woke up a completely different baby. She had her 0:32:54.607 --> 0:32:56.927 book which Grandma Maya gave her is called This is 0:32:56.967 --> 0:32:59.207 the Houlor, and it is a Jewish book and she 0:32:59.287 --> 0:33:02.767 walks around reading it constantly. Can I just say my 0:33:02.927 --> 0:33:07.047 defense some context literature. 0:33:06.607 --> 0:33:08.207 About this is a horler. I didn't buy it. We 0:33:08.207 --> 0:33:11.287 were at a live there was a bookstore in Bondai, 0:33:11.407 --> 0:33:13.047 and next to it was like a pile of books 0:33:13.047 --> 0:33:15.447 that they were giving away, and there was a book 0:33:15.447 --> 0:33:17.567 called This is the Horla and Harla is a special 0:33:17.567 --> 0:33:19.087 bread that you have on a Friday night at your 0:33:19.127 --> 0:33:21.327 butt if you're Jewish and you want to. We sort 0:33:21.367 --> 0:33:23.167 of do that sometimes, and so we just thought it 0:33:23.207 --> 0:33:25.847 was a funny book to give her. And she's never 0:33:25.887 --> 0:33:28.727 put it down, fixate on certain things. She we just 0:33:28.807 --> 0:33:29.847 kind of gave it to you as a bit of 0:33:29.847 --> 0:33:31.647 a joke, and she's insided. 0:33:31.167 --> 0:33:34.687 The gate one Theror book she has thrown herself into 0:33:34.687 --> 0:33:36.847 her due daism more than anyone else in that family. 0:33:37.007 --> 0:33:39.567 But anyway, so she had the best. It was one 0:33:39.607 --> 0:33:42.207 of those days where she loved the rock pools and 0:33:42.287 --> 0:33:45.047 like the sun was out, and I just went, this 0:33:45.127 --> 0:33:48.127 is some sort of metaphor for parenting that like the 0:33:48.127 --> 0:33:50.167 worst day where you just go, I don't know how 0:33:50.207 --> 0:33:52.287 much more of that I can handle. The next day 0:33:52.327 --> 0:33:55.287 you wake up and you just like reasons and both 0:33:55.327 --> 0:33:57.207 were for no reason and can't be explained. 0:33:57.447 --> 0:33:59.927 I think Miat once said to me that babies have 0:34:00.047 --> 0:34:03.807 this hardwired, like evolutionary instinct. They know exactly how far 0:34:03.847 --> 0:34:06.727 they can push you before you'll throw them all out away. 0:34:06.607 --> 0:34:09.447 And then pull back. 0:34:09.647 --> 0:34:11.527 Yeah, you're like, I can't have you wake up one more. 0:34:11.567 --> 0:34:13.487 It's a hard wired to survive and if they think 0:34:13.487 --> 0:34:15.487 they've pushed you too far, they dial it down. 0:34:16.487 --> 0:34:19.327 My worst of the week is I went out. I've 0:34:19.367 --> 0:34:21.487 been out for a couple of dinners this week, and 0:34:21.927 --> 0:34:24.087 at one of them it was a restaurant where they 0:34:24.247 --> 0:34:27.967 fill your glass up. And my nickname at school, not 0:34:28.047 --> 0:34:29.807 that I drank at school, but if I had drunk 0:34:29.807 --> 0:34:33.247 at school, my nickname would have been Cadbury because I 0:34:33.327 --> 0:34:34.287 was a glass and a half. 0:34:34.767 --> 0:34:36.767 Yeah right, Yeah, clearly this is non. 0:34:36.567 --> 0:34:39.127 Sponsored content because there's a glass and a half of 0:34:39.167 --> 0:34:43.847 milk in any So I'm a lightweight and that hasn't changed. 0:34:43.847 --> 0:34:46.727 I'm still a lightweight. So mostly I drink. If I'm drinking, 0:34:46.767 --> 0:34:49.887 it will be one glass usually and that's it. If 0:34:49.967 --> 0:34:52.207 it's a big night, I'll have two glasses. But two 0:34:52.207 --> 0:34:56.287 glasses is my absolute limit. But because glasses were filled up, 0:34:56.287 --> 0:34:57.487 it was quite a fancy restaurant. 0:34:57.527 --> 0:34:58.207 I don't like that. 0:34:58.327 --> 0:35:00.647 I can't keep my I mean, I wasn't driving, luckily. 0:35:01.007 --> 0:35:02.367 Yeah, if you're driving, it's a nightmare. 0:35:02.407 --> 0:35:04.487 I wasn't driving, And you know how sometimes just alcohol 0:35:04.527 --> 0:35:07.527 hits different. So I didn't feel drunk at all, and 0:35:07.527 --> 0:35:09.527 I couldn't keep tracking. The wine tasted drilling, and I 0:35:09.527 --> 0:35:12.007 had a lovely night. But then the next morning I 0:35:12.047 --> 0:35:15.047 woke up with just such a headache. Do I hangovers 0:35:15.087 --> 0:35:16.327 get worse as you get older. 0:35:16.447 --> 0:35:19.007 I heard Zoe Foster Blake talking about this recently, and 0:35:19.047 --> 0:35:22.287 she said it's a perimenopause thing that apparently your tolerance 0:35:22.287 --> 0:35:24.287 for alcohol changes with your hormones or something. 0:35:25.127 --> 0:35:27.727 Anyway, have a Frida egg the next morning? How to 0:35:27.807 --> 0:35:28.327 deal with it. 0:35:28.647 --> 0:35:30.127 I can't remember just at all. 0:35:30.327 --> 0:35:32.687 You know, there is some research to suggest that a 0:35:32.767 --> 0:35:34.487 coal can, a coke does the job. 0:35:34.967 --> 0:35:38.047 Oh, so many brands I couldn't have had a know. 0:35:38.127 --> 0:35:41.047 How long I have wanted Coca Cola to sponsor my 0:35:41.087 --> 0:35:44.127 life and they won't. Coca color and Cadbury would be 0:35:44.167 --> 0:35:45.967 your aun And where are they? 0:35:46.127 --> 0:35:46.527 Good point? 0:35:46.567 --> 0:35:47.967 We give them too much free advertising. 0:35:48.127 --> 0:35:50.847 My best of the week was also a dinner which 0:35:51.247 --> 0:35:54.927 I had with some old friends that I made at 0:35:54.967 --> 0:35:57.047 my first job, which happened to beat Cleo Magazine. I 0:35:57.087 --> 0:35:58.847 mean it wasn't my first job. I was at Woolli's 0:35:58.887 --> 0:36:01.887 but didn't make many friends there. But at Cleo I 0:36:01.927 --> 0:36:04.407 was there for five years, and a lot of the 0:36:04.447 --> 0:36:06.607 women that I worked with there it was a kind 0:36:06.647 --> 0:36:08.887 of a heyday for Cleo in the very early nineties, 0:36:09.407 --> 0:36:12.967 including Lisa Wilkinson, Paula Joy, Deborah Thomas, nicoleb and Ithen. 0:36:13.967 --> 0:36:17.487 They have remained really close friends over all of those years, 0:36:17.487 --> 0:36:19.367 and that would have been Oh god, that's thirty years ago, 0:36:20.127 --> 0:36:22.407 and so we haven't seen each other for ages and 0:36:22.447 --> 0:36:25.207 ages and ages, and a lot's happened to all of us, 0:36:25.287 --> 0:36:27.687 both good and bad. Over the years, and so we 0:36:27.807 --> 0:36:30.207 organized a dinner that nobody canceled. 0:36:30.647 --> 0:36:31.887 Yeah, that was one you wouldn't care. 0:36:32.087 --> 0:36:34.807 No, that was one that you really wouldn't cancel, Like 0:36:34.807 --> 0:36:36.167 it wouldn't have occurred to me, and you know all 0:36:36.207 --> 0:36:38.967 that stuff about I feel good when people cancel, not 0:36:39.007 --> 0:36:41.607 something like this, something like this is really special. So 0:36:42.007 --> 0:36:43.727 it was just lovely and it made me really think 0:36:43.767 --> 0:36:46.727 about I know there's a lot discussed about working from 0:36:46.807 --> 0:36:49.607 home and not working from home and how so many 0:36:49.607 --> 0:36:51.847 people like it, particularly young people, and I just really 0:36:51.887 --> 0:36:54.887 feel that they're missing out on a lot. I just 0:36:54.927 --> 0:36:58.847 made some of the most incredible friends from working in 0:36:58.887 --> 0:37:01.567 an office and people that you would never otherwise meet 0:37:01.647 --> 0:37:03.887 or get to know. And they're not all friends for life. 0:37:03.967 --> 0:37:07.567 Sometimes they're just you know, a reason, a season, a lifetime. 0:37:07.927 --> 0:37:10.927 But there's something about all being in it together that's 0:37:11.007 --> 0:37:14.287 just very very bonding and reminiscing about those years. And 0:37:14.327 --> 0:37:17.287 it's no accident that we started this new group chat 0:37:17.367 --> 0:37:21.047 and been talking about the nineties Vogue documentary and all 0:37:21.087 --> 0:37:23.167 of that stuff that we lived through together. It was 0:37:23.207 --> 0:37:25.887 just really nice to catch up. Amelia. What was your 0:37:25.927 --> 0:37:26.767 worst of the week? 0:37:26.927 --> 0:37:28.887 So my worst is just a little thing, but it 0:37:28.967 --> 0:37:31.367 kind of rankled at me. It took me a long 0:37:31.527 --> 0:37:34.127 time to get back into exercise after I had two 0:37:34.207 --> 0:37:37.687 kids in quick succession, and then there was the pandemic. 0:37:37.847 --> 0:37:38.727 What's the age gap? 0:37:39.407 --> 0:37:43.247 Our two years? But then I discovered polarates. Now there 0:37:43.287 --> 0:37:45.607 is nothing more boring than someone talking about polarates, so 0:37:45.607 --> 0:37:47.127 I'm not going to do that. I want to talk 0:37:47.127 --> 0:37:50.127 about one particular moment with an instructor that I tried out, 0:37:50.287 --> 0:37:52.807 who was otherwise very lovely and knowledgeable, but it was 0:37:52.847 --> 0:37:54.767 a moment I found really jarring and which I think 0:37:54.807 --> 0:37:57.087 sort of speaks to how we should not be talking 0:37:57.087 --> 0:38:00.407 about our bodies. So she was talking me through a movement. 0:38:00.407 --> 0:38:02.207 She asked me to turn to the mirror to look 0:38:02.207 --> 0:38:04.567 at how I was doing it, and she prefaced it 0:38:04.647 --> 0:38:07.247 with something like, now I'm going to ask you to 0:38:07.287 --> 0:38:09.407 do something that I know we women hate to do, 0:38:09.487 --> 0:38:11.567 which is look at yourself in the mirror. And I 0:38:11.607 --> 0:38:13.847 was immediately kind of pulled out of this moment where 0:38:13.847 --> 0:38:15.607 I felt good about my body and what it was 0:38:15.647 --> 0:38:18.287 doing and accomplishing, and instead I felt like I was 0:38:18.327 --> 0:38:20.167 being told that I had to feel bad about the 0:38:20.167 --> 0:38:20.927 way I look. 0:38:21.327 --> 0:38:23.287 That speaks volumes about her, doesn't it. 0:38:23.447 --> 0:38:25.487 Yeah, because it's not how I feel. I mean, not 0:38:25.527 --> 0:38:27.087 that I love looking myself in the mirror, but I 0:38:27.087 --> 0:38:29.887 certainly don't hate it. And I just this is why, 0:38:30.007 --> 0:38:33.247 whenever I hear conversations where people are talking about diets 0:38:33.847 --> 0:38:35.967 or how they don't like some part of themselves, my 0:38:36.087 --> 0:38:39.047 little active resistance is trying not to participate in that 0:38:39.167 --> 0:38:41.927 and just do not even listen to it. And I 0:38:42.007 --> 0:38:44.007 resented the fact that I was in a situation where 0:38:44.007 --> 0:38:44.967 I couldn't really do that. 0:38:45.447 --> 0:38:47.447 Yeah, oh yeah, because she sort of was in a 0:38:47.527 --> 0:38:50.807 power position over you in a way. Yeah, she's the instructor, 0:38:50.847 --> 0:38:54.647 so she says, look in the mirror. You can't say hey, exactly. Yeah, 0:38:54.647 --> 0:38:55.447 oh that's interesting. 0:38:55.607 --> 0:38:58.367 I grappled with the idea of mentioning it to the 0:38:58.407 --> 0:39:00.287 owner of the studio, and I think that was what 0:39:00.367 --> 0:39:02.767 you suggested to me. I ultimately decided not to because 0:39:02.767 --> 0:39:04.927 I didn't want to seem like I was daubing her 0:39:04.927 --> 0:39:07.567 in or anything. But it just meant that, Yeah, I 0:39:08.287 --> 0:39:11.327 didn't want her to be fired, to be clear, Sorry, 0:39:11.607 --> 0:39:12.207 but it. 0:39:12.087 --> 0:39:15.247 Was more just she wouldn't have even been aware that 0:39:15.247 --> 0:39:17.087 that was a thing, probably, and she would probably have 0:39:17.127 --> 0:39:20.727 been mortified exactly to realize what she'd been projecting onto you. 0:39:20.767 --> 0:39:23.727 She just internalized all those feelings. 0:39:23.327 --> 0:39:26.327 And it's getting so much better. But I completely agree 0:39:26.367 --> 0:39:29.447 that in most classes that I'm in, something slips through. 0:39:29.887 --> 0:39:32.527 Now it's all about summer yep, and it's all about 0:39:32.767 --> 0:39:34.487 swimsuits and go arms. 0:39:34.647 --> 0:39:36.167 That's another one I heard recently. 0:39:36.367 --> 0:39:38.607 You know who I find often of the worst the 0:39:38.687 --> 0:39:42.447 male instructors. The male instructors will say something about you know, 0:39:42.487 --> 0:39:44.487 you'll be doing a glued exercise and will be something 0:39:44.487 --> 0:39:47.047 about your bikini, and I'm like, that is just simply 0:39:47.127 --> 0:39:50.207 not why I'm here, and it sort of undermines the 0:39:50.367 --> 0:39:52.567 entire It really irks me. And I felt the same, 0:39:52.647 --> 0:39:55.127 like maybe I should say something as I leave, because I. 0:39:55.047 --> 0:39:57.167 Know this sounds like a shameless plug, which it is. 0:39:57.207 --> 0:39:59.887 But that's why we develop move the app, because it's 0:39:59.967 --> 0:40:03.207 like so much of exercise culture is about feel the 0:40:03.207 --> 0:40:05.967 burn and burning the calories and you can have dessert 0:40:06.047 --> 0:40:08.047 tonight if you do this, or you know you ate 0:40:08.047 --> 0:40:10.807 that cookie, you better work, har and we just wanted, 0:40:11.007 --> 0:40:14.247 you know, exercise that was completely free of that. It's 0:40:14.287 --> 0:40:16.487 not even body shaming, although sometimes it is, but even 0:40:16.527 --> 0:40:18.887 just body consciousness, you're doing it for. 0:40:18.927 --> 0:40:22.487 Different You want body neutrality when you're working out, and 0:40:22.527 --> 0:40:25.047 you want to decenter that male gaze. So that was 0:40:25.087 --> 0:40:27.727 a little bit of a downer. But the best is 0:40:27.767 --> 0:40:30.407 I want to say something controversial. I have noticed since 0:40:30.447 --> 0:40:32.767 moving here that Halloween gets a really bad rap. 0:40:32.887 --> 0:40:33.927 It does people. 0:40:33.607 --> 0:40:36.207 Complain about it being American. Well, I'm here to tell 0:40:36.207 --> 0:40:38.767 you that sometimes Americans have good ideas. It is my 0:40:38.847 --> 0:40:41.647 favorite holiday for many years in the US. And here's why. 0:40:42.047 --> 0:40:45.727 It is non religious. You have almost no emotional physical 0:40:45.767 --> 0:40:48.207 labor required as a parent. You basically just need to 0:40:48.327 --> 0:40:50.407 buy some fun sized chocolate bars. You don't need to 0:40:50.407 --> 0:40:53.407 cook an elaborate meal. You don't need to worry about costumes. 0:40:54.087 --> 0:40:56.327 The costumes are easy though you can put a sheet 0:40:56.327 --> 0:40:58.647 on someone. It's really not about the costumes. I find 0:40:58.647 --> 0:41:01.127 that more. It's like the older kids and maybe the 0:41:01.527 --> 0:41:03.887 young adults who get really into the costumes. But little 0:41:03.967 --> 0:41:05.967 kids honestly don't care if you just put a sheet 0:41:06.007 --> 0:41:08.327 on them and call them a ghost. And I think, 0:41:08.367 --> 0:41:09.927 what's really much on them? 0:41:09.927 --> 0:41:13.607 Anyway? It's going to stand in the corner from quiet 0:41:13.647 --> 0:41:14.247 for a bit. 0:41:14.487 --> 0:41:16.847 What I think is missing from the Halloween discussion here 0:41:17.087 --> 0:41:19.687 is that it's a community building exercise. The idea is 0:41:19.687 --> 0:41:22.207 that kids walk around the neighborhood and you talk to 0:41:22.287 --> 0:41:25.207 people who open their doors and give your kids lollies 0:41:25.247 --> 0:41:27.847 or chocolates, and you get to know them a little bit. 0:41:28.167 --> 0:41:30.287 And the kids are really excited because there's that little 0:41:30.287 --> 0:41:33.807 bit of fear in the mix as well. So what 0:41:33.967 --> 0:41:36.927 I did this weekend that was just really joyous is 0:41:37.047 --> 0:41:39.487 we went to Kmart and we stocked up big on 0:41:39.687 --> 0:41:42.807 some Halloween decorations. I got a tombstone that said I 0:41:42.807 --> 0:41:43.807 need a coffin. 0:41:43.567 --> 0:41:46.207 Break love it, Love It. 0:41:46.527 --> 0:41:48.887 Got a rat with glowing red eyes which I put 0:41:48.927 --> 0:41:51.087 outside our apartment, which I bet the people trying to 0:41:51.087 --> 0:41:53.127 sell their apartment upstairs are going to love that. 0:41:53.367 --> 0:41:55.527 It's kind of early to be getting into the Halloween. 0:41:55.647 --> 0:41:57.607 It's never too I thought it was like a. 0:41:57.527 --> 0:41:58.807 Week or two in advance. 0:41:59.007 --> 0:42:01.327 I agree with the mayor it fields early, but America's. 0:42:00.847 --> 0:42:03.367 Actually My son literally said to me, is this not 0:42:03.487 --> 0:42:05.767 too early? And I said, you're six, you know nothing. 0:42:06.447 --> 0:42:11.327 It's Australian deep inside. That is all we have time 0:42:11.407 --> 0:42:14.047 for today because we've got to go out and buy 0:42:14.207 --> 0:42:16.407 our Halloween decorations. You weird. 0:42:16.447 --> 0:42:18.407 I'm going to address Luner up and I saw an idea 0:42:18.487 --> 0:42:21.007 on Instagram which was to dress her as moodng. 0:42:21.847 --> 0:42:25.527 That's really so good. I love moved bouncy Pork. A 0:42:25.647 --> 0:42:27.607 big thank you to all of you the out louders 0:42:27.647 --> 0:42:30.367 for listening to today's show. If anyone still is, we'll 0:42:30.367 --> 0:42:32.527 be back in your ears next week. But also before 0:42:32.567 --> 0:42:34.647 we go, a big thank you to our team, Executive 0:42:34.687 --> 0:42:38.127 producer Ruth Devine, who loves it when plans are canceled 0:42:38.167 --> 0:42:41.927 and has zero shame about doing it herself. Senior producer 0:42:41.967 --> 0:42:44.847 Emmeline Gazillas, who hates letting people down, so we'll only 0:42:44.887 --> 0:42:47.247 commit if she's one hundred percent sure about the plan. 0:42:47.847 --> 0:42:51.207 And our audio producer is Leah Porges, who's secretly relieved 0:42:51.247 --> 0:42:53.687 when she gets canceled on, as well as our social 0:42:53.767 --> 0:42:57.207 media producer Isabelle Dolphin, who says yes to everything, but 0:42:57.247 --> 0:42:59.167 if she's not living it, calls in sick. 0:42:59.767 --> 0:43:01.727 Bye bye. 0:43:02.447 --> 0:43:05.607 Shout out to any Mum and Maya subscribers listening. If 0:43:05.647 --> 0:43:07.727 you love the show and we want to support us 0:43:07.727 --> 0:43:10.807 as well, subscribing to MOMMYA is the very best way 0:43:10.847 --> 0:43:13.367 to do so there is a link in the episode description.