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Speaker 1: Hallo, beautiful yighborhood. Hope you're having a great start to

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Speaker 1: the week. I mentioned last week that I'd realized since

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Speaker 1: a lot of us have been in lockdown, I thought

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Speaker 1: we would have more time to listen to podcasts, but

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Speaker 1: without the daily commute to and from work, I had

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Speaker 1: had less time to listen to podcasts and realized that

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Speaker 1: might have been the case for some of you. So

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Speaker 1: while I initially got cracking and started delivering two episodes

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Speaker 1: a weekly this year that I thought, suddenly, I realized,

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Speaker 1: oh my gosh, I might have been bombarding you guys

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Speaker 1: and had noticed some of you were taking longer to

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Speaker 1: catch up, so that I announced that I was going

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Speaker 1: to take a couple of weeks of just re releasing

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Speaker 1: episodes for Yays of our Lives, so there'd only be

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Speaker 1: one new episode per week. But I also asked you

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Speaker 1: all to let me know if I was desperately wrong,

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Speaker 1: and quite a few of you sent me messages saying

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Speaker 1: that twice a week has been lovely and a really

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Speaker 1: nice distraction during some really challenging times. So I'm sorry

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Speaker 1: that I was wrong. For those people who think that

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Speaker 1: I was right and who are having trouble catching up.

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Speaker 1: We should have messaged me, because now the voices have

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Speaker 1: been louder and have won. I will release a re

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Speaker 1: release one more episode today, but then return to the

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Speaker 1: normal schedule from the next episode. I was going to

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Speaker 1: take a couple of weeks of just doing re releases,

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Speaker 1: but I will have a fresh one for you on Thursday.

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Speaker 1: But for now, I've got one more re release for you,

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Speaker 1: which has been one of the episodes that's brought me

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Speaker 1: the most eya this year. I've actually listened to it

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Speaker 1: quite a few times just for my own personal reasons,

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Speaker 1: because our guest is just an extraordinary human being who

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Speaker 1: brings so much lightness but also covers such serious issues

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Speaker 1: so well. I mean, I've already obviously you'll rehear the

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Speaker 1: intro again, so I don't really need to ramble on here.

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Speaker 1: But a couple of you shared the episode last week,

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Speaker 1: which reminded me that it had been such an impactful

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Speaker 1: episode for so many of you, and that if anyone

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Speaker 1: had missed out on it, it would be a great

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Speaker 1: time to catch up. So re releasing that one today

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Speaker 1: and then back to the normal schedule, and hopefully there

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Speaker 1: might be a few other reshares in the coming months

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Speaker 1: or weeks, but generally only if a guest drops out,

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Speaker 1: or if it just is yeah, if the schedule gets

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Speaker 1: too tight off for whatever reason. Otherwise you'll have two

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Speaker 1: episodes a week. Hope you're having a wonderful week and

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Speaker 1: seizing your yay.

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Speaker 2: Happiness can only really come from within, and we're not

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Speaker 2: going within to find happiness because I think a lot

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Speaker 2: of us are a shit scared of what we're going

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Speaker 2: to find. You know, if we just stop for a

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Speaker 2: little bit. I mean, we're so busy, we can get

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Speaker 2: really stuck sometimes in negative emotion and self doubt and

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Speaker 2: all the stuff we've talked about, But it is so

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Speaker 2: important for him that no feeling is final.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Sees the Yay Podcast. Busy and happy

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Speaker 1: are not the same thing. We too rarely question what

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Speaker 1: makes the heart seeing. We work, then we rest, but

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Speaker 1: rarely we play and often don't realize there's more than

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Speaker 1: one way. So this is a platform to hear and

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Speaker 1: explore the stories of those who found lives. They adore

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Speaker 1: the good, bad and ugly. The best and worst day

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Speaker 1: will bear all the facets of seizing your Yeay. I'm

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Speaker 1: Sarah Davidson or a spoonful of Sarah, a lawyer turned

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Speaker 1: funt who swapped the suits and heels to co found

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Speaker 1: matcha Maiden and matcha Milk Bar. Cca is a series

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Speaker 1: of conversations on finding a life you love and exploring

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Speaker 1: the self doubt, challenge, joy, and fulfillment along the way.

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Speaker 1: While it does happen a few times in every episode,

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Speaker 1: I'm sure you can sometimes hear when I've forgotten that

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Speaker 1: we're recording for the entirety of a chat because I'm

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Speaker 1: enjoying our guests so much. You've had a sneak preview

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Speaker 1: of how much I admire Hugh van Kylenberg in The

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Speaker 1: Yeas of Our Lives a few weeks ago, when Abby,

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Speaker 1: Jelmy and I bondered over how obsessed we are with

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Speaker 1: his wit and wisdom, and this episode took that obsession

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Speaker 1: to another level. Hugh strikes the most beautiful balance between

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Speaker 1: endearingly self deprecating and calmly authoritative, navigating effortlessly between hysterical

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Speaker 1: laughter and deep exploration of mental health and personal tragedy.

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Speaker 1: His family's journey with mental illness is both heart wrenching

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Speaker 1: and heartwarming, and what he has turned that experience into

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Speaker 1: the Resilience Project is changing the world for the better,

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Speaker 1: from classrooms to AFL clubs to wherever you're listening right now.

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Speaker 1: Through presentations, school curriculum events, and his thought provoking book

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Speaker 1: with a second coming very soon. Hugh uses humor, vulnerability,

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Speaker 1: and storytelling to support the mental health of Australians through

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Speaker 1: the pillars of gratitude, empathy and mindfulness. With cricket references,

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Speaker 1: puns and relatable stories of plenty, he is changing the

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Speaker 1: way we talk about resilience and wellbeing and is quickly

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Speaker 1: becoming one of my very favorite people in the world.

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Speaker 1: Like all our guests, Hugh didn't wake up one day

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Speaker 1: with the clarity of purpose that he has right now

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Speaker 1: and takes us through all the dots that didn't connect

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Speaker 1: until he looked back years later with hindsight. From professional

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Speaker 1: cricket to school teaching and laying gas pipes before traveling

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Speaker 1: to India for love. Everything about this man is fascinating

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Speaker 1: and I couldn't be more excited to share his passion

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Speaker 1: and energy with you all. I hope you enjoy and

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Speaker 1: laugh as much as I did.

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Speaker 2: Sure as I didn't do my head, I don't think

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Speaker 2: it matters, but it's all over.

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Speaker 1: I love it. You are the most endearingly self deprecating human.

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Speaker 1: I've read your book so many times now, but every

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Speaker 1: time I read it, I have such a kut chuckle

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Speaker 1: about how when you first went out teaching and had

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Speaker 1: a class of grade five girls, the first question you

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Speaker 1: got was why your eyes so googly? They're not even

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Speaker 1: that googling, but it makes me laugh.

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Speaker 2: So the best thing was, like all the girls. Now

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Speaker 2: the girls are like, oh, don't say that, they'll look

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Speaker 2: like going. That is a very good question. I also

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Speaker 2: like to t hear the answer.

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Speaker 1: Well, normally I would kick off now by asking what

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Speaker 1: the most down to earth thing is about you, which

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Speaker 1: is even more interesting for people like yourself, whose name

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Speaker 1: and work with the Resilience Project many of us have

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Speaker 1: heard of, giving you not just a glossy social media profile,

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Speaker 1: but one associated with incredible altruism and mindfulness. So, I mean,

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Speaker 1: you're definitely on a pedestal in my books. So I

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Speaker 1: don't necessarily expect you to be so down to earth,

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Speaker 1: but you are, and that's what makes your writing so impactful.

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Speaker 1: You can just deal with such heavy topics in such

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Speaker 1: a light and hilarious way.

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Speaker 2: Well, thank you, for that. That's a very that's a

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Speaker 2: very nice thing to say. I hope, Sarah, I hope that.

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Speaker 2: I mean, you have lots of famous people on your podcast.

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Speaker 2: I definitely don't think I'm a famous or well known person.

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Speaker 2: So I hope that absolutely everything about me is down

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Speaker 2: to earth like everything. But I'll tell some things that

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Speaker 2: are not down to earth about me. There are a

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Speaker 2: couple of things that are not. I know this is

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Speaker 2: the opposite of what you're asking, but I do it

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Speaker 2: the best because I'm doing it because I feel. I

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Speaker 2: hope that absolutely everything about me is down to earth.

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Speaker 2: I hope every interaction people having me is very down

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Speaker 2: to earth. However, and I'm going to sound like a

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Speaker 2: bit of a flog from Melbourne here, but when I

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Speaker 2: get my coffee every morning, I really need it. My

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Speaker 2: order is a strong lat a three quarters full, and

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Speaker 2: if it's not three quarters, I get really upset, Like

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Speaker 2: I just it is extraordinary how often it's like four

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Speaker 2: fifths or like stop it, yeah, it's like fifty five percent.

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Speaker 2: It's not I just go looking and go that's clearly

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Speaker 2: not three quarters, Like you must know it's not three quarters,

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Speaker 2: and I get really upset. I'm not quite the person

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Speaker 2: who can excuse me if you do this again. It's

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Speaker 2: not three quarters, but I get really upset about it.

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Speaker 2: So that's one thing that's very much just not down

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Speaker 2: to earth about me.

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Speaker 1: That's amazing.

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Speaker 2: So there's one. Here's another one for it. And I

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Speaker 2: only realized this morning because I was thinking about this

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Speaker 2: is looking through some of your questions. But when I

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Speaker 2: go to a cafe, I really like to be sitting

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Speaker 2: up against the wall so I can see everything. If

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Speaker 2: that's not down to it, I can't have my back

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Speaker 2: to the play. I need to know who's coming him,

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Speaker 2: where people are coming from, what's going on. And if

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Speaker 2: I can't, if I can't get a seat in my

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Speaker 2: back to the wall, I'll go and find somewhere else.

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Speaker 2: So I think that's a bit that's not down to

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Speaker 2: earth at all.

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Speaker 1: You're such a diva. Who knews you're basically Mariah Carey.

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Speaker 2: I'll tell you a funny story. This is not really

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Speaker 2: answering your question, but I just thought of it the

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Speaker 2: place I get coffee from, and I thought of him

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Speaker 2: because they always know my three quarters, always like they're amazing.

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Speaker 2: It's in Collingwood in Melbourne, in a it called Sackville

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Speaker 2: Street and I go there every morning. They're meticulous with

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Speaker 2: their like anyway it's called a coffee or a coffee.

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Speaker 2: It's like one word and then coffee. I've never known

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Speaker 2: how I meant to say it. This guy, this guy

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Speaker 2: the other day was messaging me because we wanted to

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Speaker 2: He wanted to catch up about something. I was like,

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Speaker 2: can know as we can do that. I said, I

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Speaker 2: will catch up the coffee. He goes, yes, sounds good.

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Speaker 2: And he said where should we go? And I said

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Speaker 2: we'll go to a coffee and he goes, yeah, mate,

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Speaker 2: totally on board the coffee idea.

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Speaker 1: I've already agreed to the coffee. Let's move on.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. He's like, yeah, I'm mate, totally on board. Where

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Speaker 2: And I said a coffee. He goes, okay, I'm made.

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Speaker 2: I'm so happy to drink coffee. You. I just need

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Speaker 2: to know where. And I was like, oh, yeah, the

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Speaker 2: place is called a coffee.

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Speaker 1: That's such a dad joke, me saying, so I've got

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Speaker 1: this guy in the podcast today. Oh who who? No,

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Speaker 1: Hugh who?

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Speaker 2: It's when you order? When I order like takeaway food,

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Speaker 2: I just say my son's name or on my wife's names.

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Speaker 2: I can't. He is just impossible anyway.

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Speaker 1: It's not even that unusual. I love that you're like

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Speaker 1: the human embodiment of resilience. But these two things in

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Speaker 1: life just absolutely make you crumble. And one is just

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Speaker 1: a pure fraction math problem, like four fifths is very

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Speaker 1: close to three quarters. But you're just like I cannot no.

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Speaker 1: I cannot too.

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Speaker 2: Much milkdaugh too much milk. I can't do it.

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Speaker 1: I can't believe you even can notice the difference between

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Speaker 1: three quarters and four fifths in a coffee cup. But

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Speaker 1: I can see you're just like, you know what, gratitude empathy,

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Speaker 1: But like, fuck that. If my coffee is not right,

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Speaker 1: I swear to God.

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Speaker 2: There will be no gratitude your lot.

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Speaker 1: There, and there will be no empathy. I mean, the

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Speaker 1: fractions are clear, they're clear, Use a ruler, sort it

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Speaker 1: out the.

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Speaker 2: Amount of times exactly, humantotie. I put in my order

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Speaker 2: and I look at the person going, I know you're

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Speaker 2: not gonna get this right. I just know like you're

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Speaker 2: not listening. You haven't listened to the strong bit, you

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Speaker 2: haven't listened to three quarter, whatever it is. I just

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Speaker 2: I just know this is not going to come out

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Speaker 2: to one. But I'm meant to be the guy who's

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Speaker 2: like empathetic and I'm not when it comes to coffee.

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Speaker 1: Well that's fair enough. I mean I love that, I

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Speaker 1: love that you just own it. You're like, look, I'm

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Speaker 1: incredibly resilient for all things except the fractions of my coffee.

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Speaker 1: You got to know yourself, You got to know what

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Speaker 1: makes you yay and well as you know, the first

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Speaker 1: section of every podcast is your Way to, which is

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Speaker 1: early trace back through all the chapters before the one

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Speaker 1: that we often walk into in your life today, where

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Speaker 1: you know, I think it's so easy to assume that

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Speaker 1: you always had as much direction and purpose and clarity

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Speaker 1: as you do now, But most of the time that's

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Speaker 1: not the case. We all came from somewhere, through many

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Speaker 1: different twists and diversions, and you have the most fascinating story,

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Speaker 1: I mean, a cricket career to a bachelor of education

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Speaker 1: to India, like so many different dots that connect now

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Speaker 1: with the inside, but that maybe didn't at the time.

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Speaker 1: So take us back to young Hugh Grathorn primary carey

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Speaker 1: Baptist grammar. What were you like at school and how

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Speaker 1: did you you know, enter into your first career aspirations

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Speaker 1: as a cricketer, I.

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Speaker 2: Can say, because you're a lawyer, weren't you? Was that right? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's so like you're so articulate and so well researched.

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Speaker 2: It's like it's you can put on this whole fu

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Speaker 2: entrepreneur act. But I can see that, I can hear

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Speaker 2: the lawyer like articulate research points exactly. So yeah, it's

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Speaker 2: funny that you say that about like joining the dots,

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Speaker 2: because it's so true. A lot of people like would

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Speaker 2: say to me, oh, like you've managed to get to

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Speaker 2: this point in the results project, like has this always

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Speaker 2: been your ambition? And I can look back on my

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Speaker 2: life and join the dots and go, yeah, that made

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Speaker 2: me do that. Then I did that, and that made

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Speaker 2: me do that, and because of that, I did that,

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Speaker 2: and now we have the results project. But I felt

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Speaker 2: very lost for a very long time, like a very

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Speaker 2: long time. I gosh, as a primary school kid, I

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Speaker 2: was incredibly shy, like painfully shy, and dreaded situations where

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Speaker 2: I was going to be surrounded by people that I

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Speaker 2: didn't know too well because I just was like I

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Speaker 2: don't know what to say, I don't know how to

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Speaker 2: talk to people.

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Speaker 1: I'm Google. I mean, what am I going to do

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Speaker 1: about that?

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Speaker 2: I've got googly eyes.

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Speaker 1: Like Hugh even am I? I mean, who am I

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Speaker 1: very good?

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Speaker 2: You're very good with this? Punch must be very popular

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Speaker 2: with dads because like dad's love a good pun, and

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Speaker 2: this is littered with punts.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely. I mean's just it's just endless.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, primaries will get very shy. I love sports

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Speaker 2: so much, and if it wasn't for sport, I don't

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Speaker 2: know how it would have made my way through it.

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Speaker 2: That was kind of what I got confidence from in

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Speaker 2: primary school. I can't remember. I don't think I wrote

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Speaker 2: about it in this book. I'm writing another book at

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Speaker 2: the moment, and I think that's rather recently. But I

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Speaker 2: actually remember that when I was in grade three, we

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Speaker 2: were playing Tiggy. We went into the toilets to hide

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Speaker 2: me and some other kids and we're hiding likest of

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Speaker 2: just giggling. I saw myself in the mirror, and I remember,

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Speaker 2: I actually remember this is so we had a moment

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Speaker 2: of going, oh, I didn't think I looked like that.

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Speaker 2: I was like, I'm just so disappointed with a while

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Speaker 2: look that was it. Nine. I was like, oh, damn,

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Speaker 2: I wish I was like I thought I looked more

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Speaker 2: like that.

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Speaker 1: Of shock to see them.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like, ah, that's not what I wanted

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Speaker 2: to look like. And I was disappointed. And so I

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Speaker 2: did tell you that story. Not so people go, oh,

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Speaker 2: the poor guy. I just remember feeling like, ah, I

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Speaker 2: don't think I'm like I think I'm a very good

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Speaker 2: looking person, and I'm also very shireale. So that's not

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Speaker 2: a great combo like so, but I think a lot

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Speaker 2: of people go through that, like insecurities. We all have

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Speaker 2: insecurities that we feel from a young age. Now were

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Speaker 2: my insecurities like I'm pretty shy and also I don't

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Speaker 2: think I'm a very good looking person. Also I had

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Speaker 2: a beauty. I also had a beauty. My my sisters stunning,

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Speaker 2: and my brother's just the most beautiful man on the earth.

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Speaker 2: So I think that was like glaring, like a big

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Speaker 2: thing for me was like I don't look like and

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Speaker 2: I remember I actually remember Mum saying once and I

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Speaker 2: love Mom, She's amazing and she meant this in a

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Speaker 2: nice way. But I remember Mum saying, oh, sorry, darling.

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Speaker 2: We just got better as we went along, didn't we

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Speaker 2: Because they were like the young.

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Speaker 1: So the Resilience project came from that statement, like that

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Speaker 1: was the beginning of it all. I'm going to have

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Speaker 1: to grow a thick skin from.

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Speaker 2: Now to totally. But the point of that is just

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Speaker 2: that I remember at primary school like shy, but at

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Speaker 2: sport was I was like, I love my sport. Went

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Speaker 2: to secondary school very much. I love going to secondary school.

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Speaker 2: After about year nine when I was a bit more

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Speaker 2: comfortable but found my voice and loved sports still and

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Speaker 2: schools loved it, and I was I saw myself. I

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Speaker 2: see a psychologist quite regularly and she said to me

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Speaker 2: the other day, she said, you were built. You were

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Speaker 2: designed for secondary school. Like absolutely love social situations, very

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Speaker 2: good at sport. And that for me was like, you know,

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Speaker 2: captain everything at the final year of school and having

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Speaker 2: a school all this, like did all this stuff that

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Speaker 2: I and then I and this is the I'm not

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Speaker 2: saying not to show off. But then then I finished

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Speaker 2: school and I went to UNI, and I was so lost,

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Speaker 2: like I was just desperate for recognition, desperate for achievement.

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Speaker 2: I couldn't achieve anything because there's no people don't sew

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Speaker 2: something into your blazer for doing well at.

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Speaker 1: UNI a certificate of participation for everything.

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Speaker 2: To you do well at UNI, and like I remember it,

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Speaker 2: I was doing studying Psycho you straight out of school

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Speaker 2: and getting like an assignment back. I did really well,

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Speaker 2: and the teacher didn't even like eye contact with me,

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Speaker 2: just like dumped it on my desk and didn't say

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Speaker 2: like well done, that was awesome, just dropped and I

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Speaker 2: was like, hello, is something to say well done? Like

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Speaker 2: no one was patting me on the back ever, And

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Speaker 2: I just felt very lost outside of school. And I'm

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Speaker 2: just saying this because a lot of people, I think,

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Speaker 2: look at the Resilience projeck and go wow, like gosh,

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Speaker 2: that's such a big thing now. But for a long time,

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Speaker 2: I had no idea what I want to do. I

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Speaker 2: remember feeling very lonely as well. I'd broken up with

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Speaker 2: my girlfriend from school, who was she was just awesome,

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Speaker 2: loved her. Were a very new classic high school romance,

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Speaker 2: likely together for a couple of years. It was like

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Speaker 2: so in love. She ended up breaking with me. Breaking

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Speaker 2: up with me, she went to college and was very

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Speaker 2: popular with everyone at college, and I remember going, oh,

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Speaker 2: hopefully we could get back together. And then she started

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Speaker 2: dating an AFL footballer, and I was.

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Speaker 1: Like, oh my gosh, it's all over.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's all over. She was dating Jeff White, who

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Speaker 2: played for Melbourne Football Club. This is going back a

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Speaker 2: long time. But I was like, oh my gosh, how

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Speaker 2: well there goes? Anyway? So I just felt so down

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Speaker 2: and so lost, And when played cricket in England for

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Speaker 2: a bit and loved that, came back to do primary

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Speaker 2: school teaching. It wasn't until I started doing primary school

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Speaker 2: teaching that I felt like I started to belong somewhere again.

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Speaker 2: But even that, like we all have psychological needs, right,

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Speaker 2: We haven't need to feel loved to feel like we

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Speaker 2: belong for status and for validation. There are psychological needs.

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Speaker 2: Like we know about our physical needs food, water, shelter.

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Speaker 2: If I took those away from you wouldn't live too long,

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Speaker 2: and our psychological needs are just as pressing. So when

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Speaker 2: I look back on my life, I realized when I

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Speaker 2: left school, I didn't feel like I was getting many

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Speaker 2: of those, like I'd lost my long term girlfriend, so

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Speaker 2: I didn't feel very loved. I was not being told

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Speaker 2: every day at school I was amazing at sport and

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Speaker 2: popular blah blah blah. And then I shouldn't feel like

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Speaker 2: I belonged anywhere, and so I kind of belonged. Is

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Speaker 2: that a word I belonged?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it is.

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Speaker 2: It is. Thank you? Yep, good?

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Speaker 1: Are you okay? Mate? Struggle? No, I love it so much.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, I think I felt very lost for a

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Speaker 2: long time. And it wasn't until I was I think

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Speaker 2: I was when I started teaching in a school. I

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Speaker 2: felt really good again. It was great, but I just

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Speaker 2: had this feeling inside of me like I would love

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Speaker 2: to do more than this. I don't know what, but

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Speaker 2: I feel like i'd love to and I had no

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Speaker 2: idea what it was. So it wasn't This is age

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Speaker 2: twenty seven, twenty eight, and I wasn't thinking I'd love

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Speaker 2: to start this movement where we help people to feel happier.

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Speaker 2: It was just I went to India because my ex

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Speaker 2: fiance wanted to go there. We'd been together for about

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Speaker 2: five years I think at that point, and she said

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Speaker 2: I'd love to go and travel, and I said, I'd

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Speaker 2: much rather stay in Melbourne because my friends are here

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Speaker 2: and I like playing football in the winter and cricket

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Speaker 2: in the summer. So I don't really know. There's no

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Speaker 2: time I can really go sorry, And I became apparent

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Speaker 2: that she was going definitely, and I didn't want to

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Speaker 2: lose her, so I went, yep, Okay, I'm coming. And

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Speaker 2: didn't really want to go to India, but her father's Indian,

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Speaker 2: so she wanted to go there. So we went there,

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Speaker 2: and then a few weeks in she kind of said,

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Speaker 2: I think we should do some volunteer teaching, and I

399
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Speaker 2: was like, I don't know about that, but we'd ended

400
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Speaker 2: up doing it, and I'm so iowed so much for this,

401
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Speaker 2: but we ended up in this village of people where

402
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Speaker 2: like I had nothing like and you've read about this

403
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Speaker 2: in the book, and I won't go into for too

404
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Speaker 2: long because most people probably know the story. But people

405
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Speaker 2: sleeping on the floor, people you know, know electricity or

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Speaker 2: I had electricity, I couldn't afford to have it switched on,

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Speaker 2: all that kind of stuff, And yet they were the

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Speaker 2: happiest people I've ever met in my entire life. And

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Speaker 2: the whole time I was there, I just couldn't stop

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Speaker 2: thinking about my little sister, Georgia, who was diagnosed with

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Speaker 2: a mental illness age fourteen and are EXI and Nevosa

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Speaker 2: body image issues. She stopped eating and it ravaged her

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Speaker 2: and it ravaged our family. And when I was in India,

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Speaker 2: I was remembering as a kid, when I was so

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Speaker 2: much as a kid, like late teens, I remember thinking

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Speaker 2: to myself, I wish I knew what I could do

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Speaker 2: to help mom and dad and my brother feel happy again.

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Speaker 2: Like I knew my sister's mental illness was way beyond me.

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Speaker 2: I didn't know what to do to help her, but

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Speaker 2: I remember thinking I wish I knew what I could

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Speaker 2: do to help mom and dad feel happy. And when

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Speaker 2: I was in India, like literally ten years later, my

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Speaker 2: sisters still you wouldn't say she was totally healthy. At

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Speaker 2: that point, I was there just thinking, oh my gosh,

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Speaker 2: like there's something here, like these people are onto something.

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Speaker 2: They are onto something. And also I think we do

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Speaker 2: a bit wrong back home. I think we're doing a

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Speaker 2: little bit wrong back home. And so I guess that's

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Speaker 2: where the resulience projects started. I lived there for three months,

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Speaker 2: did everything these people were doing. Came back to Australia

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Speaker 2: and I was like, right, I would love to share

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Speaker 2: with everyone what these people do because we're doing so

433
00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:11,040
Speaker 2: much wrong.

434
00:19:11,680 --> 00:19:14,320
Speaker 1: I had a very similar I actually have been to

435
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:20,160
Speaker 1: that Laylor Dark region one's I know, and we were

436
00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:22,320
Speaker 1: guided and I wonder I will have to show you

437
00:19:22,359 --> 00:19:24,680
Speaker 1: a photo later by a guy called stans In. Oh

438
00:19:24,720 --> 00:19:28,679
Speaker 1: my gosh, I'm not sure if it could possibly be

439
00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:30,600
Speaker 1: the same stands in, but I mean quite a few

440
00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:31,800
Speaker 1: of them, yeah.

441
00:19:31,640 --> 00:19:33,080
Speaker 2: Okay, a lot of I feel like most of the

442
00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:34,080
Speaker 2: people there were called Stands.

443
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:38,359
Speaker 1: There's probably not the same one. It's probably like John

444
00:19:38,480 --> 00:19:39,600
Speaker 1: or something really common.

445
00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:42,720
Speaker 2: I think I think that's the case. But even more like,

446
00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:44,760
Speaker 2: quite seriously, in the school, I felt like most of

447
00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:48,280
Speaker 2: the kids, majority of them were called Stanson.

448
00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:52,080
Speaker 1: Oh okay, well that's really inconvenient then for our beautiful.

449
00:19:53,840 --> 00:19:56,400
Speaker 2: Story. But still that's amazing. I don't think i've ever

450
00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:58,800
Speaker 2: turned to someone who's been to Laila Dark. What an

451
00:19:58,800 --> 00:19:59,520
Speaker 2: amazing place.

452
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:04,119
Speaker 1: It was absolutely mind blowing, and that trip combined with

453
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:07,119
Speaker 1: I had a very similar revelation to you there and

454
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:10,159
Speaker 1: then a couple of years later in rural Rwanda of

455
00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:14,080
Speaker 1: all places, expecting to feel this incredible sense of gratitude

456
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:16,600
Speaker 1: for and of course that's one level. You have incredible

457
00:20:16,600 --> 00:20:20,080
Speaker 1: gratitude for all the opportunities and technology and access we

458
00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:23,080
Speaker 1: have to education, and then all kinds of privileges. But

459
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:27,760
Speaker 1: I had that same kind of reverse unexpected revelation of like,

460
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:31,280
Speaker 1: why is there purer happiness here with kids playing with

461
00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:34,600
Speaker 1: a leaf for twelve hours and adults breaking into songs

462
00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:37,440
Speaker 1: spontaneously because they can't contain the joy and their bodies,

463
00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:40,600
Speaker 1: But they don't have any of what I understood happiness

464
00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:44,040
Speaker 1: to be, which was success and progress and all those

465
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:47,080
Speaker 1: kinds of things. And it's interesting you worded this in

466
00:20:47,119 --> 00:20:50,359
Speaker 1: the book as you saw the secret to happiness, And

467
00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:53,399
Speaker 1: I felt exactly the same way that the secret to

468
00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:55,480
Speaker 1: happiness was not to attach it to all the things

469
00:20:55,520 --> 00:20:57,560
Speaker 1: that we think back home it's attached to, but to

470
00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:01,040
Speaker 1: not have it attached to an and for it to

471
00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:05,840
Speaker 1: just be in mindfulness and enjoying each other's company and

472
00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:09,160
Speaker 1: the very very simple things. Yeah, it's almost like having

473
00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:10,400
Speaker 1: less you can be happier.

474
00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:13,239
Speaker 2: It's strange, it's very true. I think we've become so

475
00:21:13,560 --> 00:21:17,600
Speaker 2: distracted with feeling like we need more of something in

476
00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:20,600
Speaker 2: order to be happy, Like we need to be earning

477
00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:22,240
Speaker 2: more money, and when we earn that amount of money,

478
00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,760
Speaker 2: then we'll feel happier. Then we can buy that car,

479
00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:27,360
Speaker 2: then we'll feel happier. If I could buy this house

480
00:21:27,359 --> 00:21:28,720
Speaker 2: and live in a suburb like this, then I feel

481
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:30,720
Speaker 2: if I get there's many social media followers, and I

482
00:21:30,760 --> 00:21:32,919
Speaker 2: feel happy. Whatever it is, there's nothing wrong with all

483
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:35,800
Speaker 2: those things, like they're all perfectly healthy things to aspire towards.

484
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:38,440
Speaker 2: But I think the problem is we attach happiness to them.

485
00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:41,560
Speaker 2: But happiness can only really come from within, and we're

486
00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:44,200
Speaker 2: not going within to find happiness because I think a

487
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:45,680
Speaker 2: lot of us are a shit scared of what we're

488
00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:47,399
Speaker 2: going to find, you know, if we just stop for

489
00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:50,000
Speaker 2: a little bit. I mean we're so busy, like you

490
00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:52,199
Speaker 2: look at your calendar, We oh, there's a spare out there,

491
00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:53,879
Speaker 2: I'll do this here, I'll do this here. It's almost

492
00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:55,320
Speaker 2: like we just don't want to be alone, like we're

493
00:21:55,359 --> 00:21:57,119
Speaker 2: worried about and then when we are alone, we just

494
00:21:57,119 --> 00:21:58,960
Speaker 2: grab our phone out straight away and we just get

495
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:01,840
Speaker 2: lost in our phones. And I think there's so many

496
00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:04,760
Speaker 2: problems in that, and devices are causing some issues for us.

497
00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:06,399
Speaker 2: But I just think we've got to get better at

498
00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:08,119
Speaker 2: just I mean, the things I saw in this village,

499
00:22:08,119 --> 00:22:10,400
Speaker 2: would you already know about? These people were so good

500
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,199
Speaker 2: at just focusing on what they did have, and it

501
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:16,159
Speaker 2: wasn't much. But my gosh, they just celebrated like the

502
00:22:16,200 --> 00:22:18,200
Speaker 2: things out of the river, like they can get water

503
00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:20,240
Speaker 2: from They had a whole day. We went down the

504
00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:22,280
Speaker 2: river for a whole day. It was one of my

505
00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,320
Speaker 2: first days there, and I was like, they said, we're

506
00:22:24,359 --> 00:22:26,679
Speaker 2: going on an excursion to the river. I don't know

507
00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:28,400
Speaker 2: what are we doing there? They said, what do you mean,

508
00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:30,120
Speaker 2: what do we What do you mean we're going through river? Yeah,

509
00:22:30,119 --> 00:22:32,320
Speaker 2: but like what are the activities? What activities are we're doing?

510
00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:33,879
Speaker 2: They what do you mean by we're just going to

511
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:36,080
Speaker 2: go there? And they weren't joking. They went there for

512
00:22:36,119 --> 00:22:38,679
Speaker 2: the entire day. And I said, so what's the I said, Oh,

513
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:40,879
Speaker 2: we're just celebrating this, like this is we get our

514
00:22:40,880 --> 00:22:43,240
Speaker 2: water from here. We're so lucky. I was thinking, God,

515
00:22:43,280 --> 00:22:45,399
Speaker 2: what would the equivalent be in Australia, Like would that

516
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:47,160
Speaker 2: be like if we had a day were order celebrated

517
00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:49,639
Speaker 2: taps like we stopped it just like how good is

518
00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:51,720
Speaker 2: that we've got taps? But I reckon we should like

519
00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:54,280
Speaker 2: how lucky are we to have holes in the wall

520
00:22:54,320 --> 00:22:56,640
Speaker 2: where water comes out at the exact temperature we want

521
00:22:56,640 --> 00:22:59,240
Speaker 2: it as much as we want, Like that's amazing, Like

522
00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:02,600
Speaker 2: if you're in a situation where you have water that

523
00:23:02,600 --> 00:23:05,159
Speaker 2: comes out of your walls and you can choose the temperature.

524
00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:08,000
Speaker 2: Two thirds of the world's population two thirds or a

525
00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:09,960
Speaker 2: third anyway, a lot of people around the world don't

526
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,440
Speaker 2: have that. Like the fact that you do it, you're

527
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:15,160
Speaker 2: very lucky. But we only notice that when the hot

528
00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:17,040
Speaker 2: water's not working. That's the only time we go. O

529
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:20,359
Speaker 2: fox sake, you're kidding me, he said, we should be going.

530
00:23:20,560 --> 00:23:22,280
Speaker 2: I like him. I right, this has happened once in

531
00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:24,560
Speaker 2: a year. Once in a year, I haven't got hot water.

532
00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:27,040
Speaker 2: That's amazing. Some people never ever get hot water. So

533
00:23:27,119 --> 00:23:29,560
Speaker 2: I think some people say yeah, But these people living

534
00:23:29,600 --> 00:23:31,320
Speaker 2: in countries like that, they don't know what they don't have,

535
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:33,840
Speaker 2: so that's why it's easy for them. I mean, the

536
00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:35,520
Speaker 2: story I tell in the book is that the kids

537
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:38,240
Speaker 2: at the first lunchtime said, sir, come see the playground,

538
00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:40,160
Speaker 2: and I said, love to see a playground. They pointed

539
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:42,160
Speaker 2: at this playground. They pointed over their shoulders at the

540
00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:44,640
Speaker 2: swings that were there was like two chains dangling down.

541
00:23:44,640 --> 00:23:47,280
Speaker 2: The seat wasn't attached properly, and I thought they were saying,

542
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:48,639
Speaker 2: look how bad this is. But when I looked at

543
00:23:48,640 --> 00:23:51,600
Speaker 2: their faces. I realized I was saying, check this out,

544
00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:54,120
Speaker 2: and I was thinking I remember thinking, yeah, but that's

545
00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:55,880
Speaker 2: because I don't know what they don't have. But then

546
00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:59,280
Speaker 2: the local high school, which you probably saw in your travels,

547
00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:02,199
Speaker 2: it's called the tick Say School has beautiful pikerment and

548
00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:05,040
Speaker 2: these kids walk past it every day. It doesn't bother them.

549
00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:06,760
Speaker 2: When they get to their school, they're like, well, this

550
00:24:06,840 --> 00:24:10,000
Speaker 2: is what we've got. How lucky are we? So I

551
00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:12,240
Speaker 2: think the more time we spend focusing on what we've

552
00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:14,000
Speaker 2: got and not worrying about what we don't have, the

553
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:14,879
Speaker 2: happier it will be.

554
00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:19,200
Speaker 1: Absolutely. I love the way that you describe how stunts

555
00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:22,639
Speaker 1: and uses this like you would say this, look at this,

556
00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:25,119
Speaker 1: and every time they'd point at all the things like

557
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:27,120
Speaker 1: shoes he had, and he was like this, like, look

558
00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:30,200
Speaker 1: at my shoes. And how many people you've since told

559
00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:34,080
Speaker 1: that story to, even like AFL football is now write

560
00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:37,000
Speaker 1: this on their wrist to remind themselves of how lucky

561
00:24:37,040 --> 00:24:38,879
Speaker 1: they are to have the things that they have. And

562
00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:42,280
Speaker 1: it's really really simple, A simple word in like the

563
00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:45,879
Speaker 1: cutest little Laylor Duck accent that brings you back to

564
00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:48,399
Speaker 1: that idea that we are so incredibly lucky and we

565
00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:51,399
Speaker 1: take all those things for granted in the quest for more,

566
00:24:51,680 --> 00:24:53,919
Speaker 1: and I think you put it as the if and

567
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:55,560
Speaker 1: when kind of approach to it.

568
00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:58,960
Speaker 2: And then if I buy this card, that I feel happy.

569
00:24:59,080 --> 00:24:59,600
Speaker 2: Doesn't work.

570
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:03,240
Speaker 1: Attach your happiness to those things, and it will always

571
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:05,920
Speaker 1: be delayed and they'll always be something more. If you're

572
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:08,960
Speaker 1: enjoying kind of the journey and the process, you'll always

573
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:11,680
Speaker 1: have happiness because they end up delaying it until sort

574
00:25:11,720 --> 00:25:14,320
Speaker 1: of some random sequence of events totally.

575
00:25:14,359 --> 00:25:17,159
Speaker 2: And I just so people don't I'm not saying so

576
00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:19,480
Speaker 2: over on, try and be more like me. I struggle

577
00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:21,000
Speaker 2: with this stuff just as much as the next person.

578
00:25:21,040 --> 00:25:23,840
Speaker 2: Like I've caught myself recently, I've been stuck on Instagram

579
00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:27,200
Speaker 2: looking at like garden design, landscape design, because we're getting

580
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:30,080
Speaker 2: like we're getting the back guard landscape and I'm looking

581
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:32,320
Speaker 2: at these different designs, going if we could get that

582
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:35,000
Speaker 2: done by summer, then summer's going to be awesome because

583
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:36,560
Speaker 2: I'll be sitting out there in that area. Then I'll

584
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:38,439
Speaker 2: be doing this and I'm going hanging a minute. You

585
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:40,679
Speaker 2: talk about this every day, I know what all happen is.

586
00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:42,520
Speaker 2: I'll get the garden done. I'll be sitting out there

587
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:44,560
Speaker 2: and I look around and go, right, what next if

588
00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:46,040
Speaker 2: we do that. We need to get that, need to

589
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:47,719
Speaker 2: get the front garden done. When the front gun's done,

590
00:25:47,720 --> 00:25:49,080
Speaker 2: then everything's going to be great. And then we'll do

591
00:25:49,119 --> 00:25:51,159
Speaker 2: that and I'll go right. A really good mate of

592
00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:53,680
Speaker 2: mine has got this beautiful place in the mornings in Peninsula,

593
00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:56,200
Speaker 2: and he's put so much work into it the last

594
00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:57,879
Speaker 2: couple of years and it's amazing. And he sent you

595
00:25:57,880 --> 00:26:00,440
Speaker 2: a message the other day and he said, you must

596
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:01,720
Speaker 2: be so happy. You sent me a picture of the

597
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:03,600
Speaker 2: kids having a great time out in the pool and

598
00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:06,399
Speaker 2: said you must be so happy. And he said, oh,

599
00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:08,840
Speaker 2: I'm feel so ashamed. I've gone down the exact path

600
00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:10,600
Speaker 2: you talk about every day. I'm started to look at

601
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:13,320
Speaker 2: better houses now like I'm now looking at like we

602
00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:15,440
Speaker 2: need more land. This isn't enough land for the kids.

603
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:17,720
Speaker 2: He said. It's ridiculous. Like if someone has showed me

604
00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:19,959
Speaker 2: a picture of my place ten years ago, I'd go, well,

605
00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:22,120
Speaker 2: I've got it made. I'm set. We're never satisfied.

606
00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:24,720
Speaker 1: And I think it is a really fine line between

607
00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:28,760
Speaker 1: it being okay to aspire to more that not taking

608
00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:31,159
Speaker 1: away from what you have, and it is a really

609
00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:35,119
Speaker 1: subtle difference between those two things. But being aware of

610
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:37,919
Speaker 1: that difference, I think is the important thing. And another

611
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,160
Speaker 1: thing I love about you and how you tell your

612
00:26:40,200 --> 00:26:43,960
Speaker 1: story in such an endearingly self deprecating way. As I said,

613
00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:48,080
Speaker 1: it reminds me of Mark Manson's kind of abrupt reminder

614
00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:50,159
Speaker 1: in the subtle art of not giving a fuck that

615
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:54,080
Speaker 1: not all of us are special snowflakes, and not every

616
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:57,720
Speaker 1: kid should get a trophy for every achievement in school.

617
00:26:58,240 --> 00:27:01,000
Speaker 1: I personally think every child is a special snowflake in

618
00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:03,040
Speaker 1: their own way, and that you know, there's nothing wrong

619
00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:06,760
Speaker 1: with telling them that. But it did make me think

620
00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:10,159
Speaker 1: about how easily others could assume that you were born

621
00:27:10,320 --> 00:27:13,399
Speaker 1: with this special vision and clarity of purpose that you

622
00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:17,000
Speaker 1: knew would positively impact hundreds and thousands of people. But

623
00:27:17,040 --> 00:27:20,040
Speaker 1: it sounds like the young Hu had no idea what

624
00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 1: a special thing you'd end up creating so many chapters

625
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:26,320
Speaker 1: down the track. So how did it all unravel into

626
00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:28,359
Speaker 1: what the Resilience Project is today?

627
00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:32,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's funny. There are so many lessons looking back

628
00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:34,880
Speaker 2: now that I feel like a really available for people

629
00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:37,399
Speaker 2: who are wanting to try and create their own whatever

630
00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:39,879
Speaker 2: it is you're try to pursue your purpose or whatever

631
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:42,679
Speaker 2: it is. But there are so many points to be

632
00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:45,520
Speaker 2: very honest with everyone where I tried to get out

633
00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:49,920
Speaker 2: like but wasn't successful. So like, I think I had

634
00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:53,120
Speaker 2: my greatest passion in life. And there are so many

635
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:55,080
Speaker 2: things I am not good at. But one of the

636
00:27:55,080 --> 00:27:57,320
Speaker 2: things I've always been okay it is public speaking. I've

637
00:27:57,320 --> 00:28:01,159
Speaker 2: always loved public spaking, like at school, anypportunity to public speaking,

638
00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:03,760
Speaker 2: I just loved it. And I think it's because when

639
00:28:03,800 --> 00:28:06,160
Speaker 2: we're in our darkest moments as a family, we would

640
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:08,399
Speaker 2: watch mom and dad love Billy Connolly the comedian, and

641
00:28:08,440 --> 00:28:10,359
Speaker 2: they'd put Billy Connelly on and would all watch him.

642
00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:12,200
Speaker 2: And I would see Mum and dad like in tears

643
00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:16,119
Speaker 2: of laughter, which is a very refreshing change from tears

644
00:28:16,119 --> 00:28:18,320
Speaker 2: of pain looking at my sister's mental illness. Right, So

645
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:21,480
Speaker 2: I would watch Billy Connelly and go, that is the

646
00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:23,280
Speaker 2: way you make my mum and dad happy. And you know,

647
00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:26,239
Speaker 2: we all we also desperately want to make our mum

648
00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:29,080
Speaker 2: and dad happy and to have feel like we have

649
00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:31,400
Speaker 2: the affection of love of our parents. So I became

650
00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:34,679
Speaker 2: very fascinated with that, with speaking in public and how

651
00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:37,000
Speaker 2: that how much joy that can spread. So from a

652
00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:39,160
Speaker 2: young age love that obsessed with that. But then I

653
00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:40,720
Speaker 2: didn't think there are any jobs you could do as

654
00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:43,080
Speaker 2: a public speaker, right Like I thought stand up comedian.

655
00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:45,240
Speaker 2: Now I'm not doing that. That's like I'd love to

656
00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:48,040
Speaker 2: but not quite funny enough. And so I just I

657
00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 2: don't know watch my job would be, but I always

658
00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:51,920
Speaker 2: thought i'd like to do that. I went through teaching

659
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 2: and had this idea. Came back to Melbourne and a

660
00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:55,960
Speaker 2: friend of mine said, do you want to speak to

661
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:58,400
Speaker 2: my class about what you did in India? And I said,

662
00:28:58,400 --> 00:28:59,840
Speaker 2: I think'd be pretty boring, but I'm happy to come

663
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:01,760
Speaker 2: and do it. Went along did this talk. I didn't

664
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:03,480
Speaker 2: plan it. I just had a few photos to flick

665
00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:06,080
Speaker 2: through and I'll never forget the look on the kids' faces.

666
00:29:06,360 --> 00:29:08,360
Speaker 2: I remember she said they're a pretty full on class,

667
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:11,080
Speaker 2: so be prepared, and I was saying, that's fine, yea,

668
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:12,760
Speaker 2: I'm a teacher. There's no hys. But there was no

669
00:29:12,800 --> 00:29:15,360
Speaker 2: classroom management in that hour. It was the kids that

670
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:18,080
Speaker 2: are captivated. And I got in the car afterwards I

671
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:21,240
Speaker 2: was like, WHOA I am buzzing from that like that

672
00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:24,040
Speaker 2: was awesome. I remember think I'd love to do that

673
00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:26,200
Speaker 2: every day, but unfortunately that's not a job going around

674
00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:28,200
Speaker 2: and telling that's not a job you can do. So

675
00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:30,320
Speaker 2: I went back to teaching for a couple of years,

676
00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:32,440
Speaker 2: but I put into practice all the principles I've learned

677
00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:34,600
Speaker 2: in India with this group of year twelve kids who

678
00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:37,000
Speaker 2: are a very difficult group of kids to teach, and

679
00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:39,480
Speaker 2: I saw the impact it had on them. A guy

680
00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:42,600
Speaker 2: I knew said I'm starting a business. I'm going to

681
00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:45,640
Speaker 2: inspect to corporates if I would, if you think you've

682
00:29:45,640 --> 00:29:46,680
Speaker 2: got something to about, if you want to come and

683
00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:49,000
Speaker 2: join me, I said, yep, no, rise and that he

684
00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:50,720
Speaker 2: was a wonderful guy. His names Dave. Did it for

685
00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:52,680
Speaker 2: six months, but we had no It just wasn't going

686
00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 2: to work together because I wanted to do schools, he

687
00:29:54,360 --> 00:29:56,360
Speaker 2: was doing corporate. I didn't quite work out. So then

688
00:29:56,440 --> 00:29:58,160
Speaker 2: I was like, Okay, now I'm a fish. I joined him,

689
00:29:58,160 --> 00:29:59,560
Speaker 2: but now it's not happening. I don't have a job.

690
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:00,920
Speaker 2: I'm a fish on my own. I've got to make

691
00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:04,480
Speaker 2: some money. So I called my old school where I went,

692
00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:06,560
Speaker 2: I called this carry Then I called the school that

693
00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:08,600
Speaker 2: I taught at and said, can I come and give

694
00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:11,160
Speaker 2: a talk? It will cost I think I charged like

695
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:13,880
Speaker 2: one hundred dollars I think for an hour, and I

696
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:15,880
Speaker 2: remember thinking that's a lot of money. But anyway, hopefully

697
00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:18,200
Speaker 2: that can play that. And I just loved it. It

698
00:30:18,240 --> 00:30:20,440
Speaker 2: went so well. I was like, all right, this is me.

699
00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:22,440
Speaker 2: This is my full time thing now. And then I

700
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:24,800
Speaker 2: started calling other schools and they were going, sorry, who

701
00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:33,840
Speaker 2: are you? And you? Yeah, so where have you done

702
00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:36,480
Speaker 2: your talks? I said, Carrey and mild and they went, yeah,

703
00:30:36,600 --> 00:30:38,520
Speaker 2: where have you done it? There wasn't your old school

704
00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:40,560
Speaker 2: and where you care it? And I'd go, oh no,

705
00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:42,239
Speaker 2: you'd be the first. And everyone's like, yeah, come back

706
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:43,760
Speaker 2: in a year, let us know how you go. And

707
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:45,640
Speaker 2: no one would have me. I think I did like

708
00:30:45,680 --> 00:30:48,080
Speaker 2: a talk a month and I'm down to zero dollars

709
00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:49,800
Speaker 2: and I was like, oh my god, I love this,

710
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:51,640
Speaker 2: but it's just not going to work. Like it's just not.

711
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:55,200
Speaker 2: But then every now and again i'd get these little wins,

712
00:30:55,240 --> 00:30:57,240
Speaker 2: like a school. I actually went, can you come and

713
00:30:57,240 --> 00:30:59,160
Speaker 2: do three talks today? For these three yep, No, I's

714
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:01,520
Speaker 2: done speak about this, and it'd be something I don't

715
00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:03,560
Speaker 2: talk about at all, but i'd go yeap naraws, that's fine,

716
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:05,200
Speaker 2: I talk about that, and just sort of just said

717
00:31:05,280 --> 00:31:08,040
Speaker 2: yes to everything. I remember one day, driving five hours

718
00:31:08,080 --> 00:31:11,479
Speaker 2: to I had a student session in the morning in Melbourne.

719
00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:12,960
Speaker 2: I had nothing on for like a while, but a

720
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 2: student session in the morning, and then I had to

721
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:16,800
Speaker 2: get to Portland by three o'clock in the afterno it

722
00:31:16,920 --> 00:31:18,680
Speaker 2: was a five and a half hour drive. Then I

723
00:31:18,680 --> 00:31:22,000
Speaker 2: had to get back to Melbourne to do a parent

724
00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:23,719
Speaker 2: talk like a thirty nine of us. I was like,

725
00:31:24,280 --> 00:31:26,080
Speaker 2: drove to Portland and back in the day and did

726
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:29,760
Speaker 2: three sessions, and I just I was like, I cannot

727
00:31:29,760 --> 00:31:31,080
Speaker 2: say no to anything. Just you have to say you

728
00:31:31,160 --> 00:31:33,800
Speaker 2: striving it in. But even then after two years it

729
00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:35,960
Speaker 2: wasn't enough. I also felt quite lonely because it was

730
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:38,400
Speaker 2: me doing it by myself, Like after a couple of years, like,

731
00:31:38,400 --> 00:31:39,400
Speaker 2: I don't know if I can do this anymore. So

732
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:40,920
Speaker 2: I actually applied for a couple of jobs. I think

733
00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:42,680
Speaker 2: it was a job at Headspace doing something in their

734
00:31:42,680 --> 00:31:45,400
Speaker 2: school program. I was like, I'll do that, and then

735
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:46,840
Speaker 2: I didn't get that job, and I was like, oh

736
00:31:46,840 --> 00:31:49,160
Speaker 2: my gosh, if I can't get that job like so.

737
00:31:49,280 --> 00:31:51,520
Speaker 2: And then I think there was a job at Cricket Victoria,

738
00:31:51,680 --> 00:31:54,400
Speaker 2: like education manager. I was like, I'll get I'll apply

739
00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:56,200
Speaker 2: for that. I didn't get that job. I was like gosh,

740
00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:58,600
Speaker 2: like no one wants me, Like I don't have a girlfriend.

741
00:31:58,640 --> 00:32:00,600
Speaker 2: I like like, I can't get a job and no

742
00:32:00,600 --> 00:32:03,080
Speaker 2: one will see me speak. I was so lost. But

743
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:06,440
Speaker 2: here's the thing. Back then, I was not oka vulnerability,

744
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:08,880
Speaker 2: so I didn't let anyone know. I was like, yeah, fine,

745
00:32:08,880 --> 00:32:11,800
Speaker 2: loving it. Life's awesome, Life's so great. I wish so much.

746
00:32:12,160 --> 00:32:13,920
Speaker 2: At least to my parents, I've been a bit more

747
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:16,120
Speaker 2: honest and said I feel so lowly at the moment,

748
00:32:16,200 --> 00:32:19,080
Speaker 2: like I'm very single and no one wants to have

749
00:32:19,120 --> 00:32:22,120
Speaker 2: any to do with my program, Like I've just got nothing. Really,

750
00:32:22,120 --> 00:32:23,800
Speaker 2: But I was to mom and dad, I was like, great, yeah,

751
00:32:23,840 --> 00:32:27,200
Speaker 2: so many good things happening, which was yeah, yeah, which

752
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:29,240
Speaker 2: we all kind of tend to do. But looking back,

753
00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:31,080
Speaker 2: I'd be a lot more open with and a lot

754
00:32:31,080 --> 00:32:33,720
Speaker 2: more self deprecating them more like here that things are flying.

755
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:35,440
Speaker 2: I've got no work and I don't have a girl friend,

756
00:32:35,480 --> 00:32:38,160
Speaker 2: so it's good, you know, Like if we could take

757
00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:39,640
Speaker 2: the piss out of souls a lot more than we do.

758
00:32:39,720 --> 00:32:43,920
Speaker 2: But then it just slowly started to very slowly started

759
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:45,840
Speaker 2: to I would go from one talk a month to

760
00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:48,120
Speaker 2: one talk every fortnight, then to a talk a week,

761
00:32:48,160 --> 00:32:51,320
Speaker 2: and then in two thousand and by two thousand was

762
00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:53,680
Speaker 2: in two thy eleven I started up. By twenty fourteen,

763
00:32:53,720 --> 00:32:55,560
Speaker 2: I was doing about fifteen talks a week.

764
00:32:55,920 --> 00:32:56,520
Speaker 1: Oh my god.

765
00:32:56,560 --> 00:32:59,440
Speaker 2: I was like, I collapsed at us on a stage

766
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:01,720
Speaker 2: in two thousand than sixteen, and it was the end

767
00:33:01,760 --> 00:33:03,320
Speaker 2: I'd done. It was my fifth talk for the day,

768
00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:05,880
Speaker 2: seventeenth for the week or something, you know. That was

769
00:33:06,120 --> 00:33:07,800
Speaker 2: I was like, well, I went through two or three

770
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:09,040
Speaker 2: years of no one wanting to know me. All of

771
00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:10,440
Speaker 2: a sudden everyone wants doing me talk. I'm not going

772
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:11,840
Speaker 2: to say no to anyone. Want to kept doing this

773
00:33:12,560 --> 00:33:14,320
Speaker 2: like that's proper resilience, you know. And I wasn't really

774
00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:16,520
Speaker 2: looking after myself, but I've sort of jumped ahead a

775
00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:18,600
Speaker 2: little bit in the story. But it just took off,

776
00:33:18,680 --> 00:33:20,760
Speaker 2: like it just from the outside it took off. It

777
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:22,920
Speaker 2: was a lot of hard work, like a lot of

778
00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:25,400
Speaker 2: hard work, and I think looking back on it, when

779
00:33:25,400 --> 00:33:27,600
Speaker 2: people ask what was the secret to it? I worked

780
00:33:27,720 --> 00:33:29,560
Speaker 2: very hard at something I think I was good at,

781
00:33:29,640 --> 00:33:31,560
Speaker 2: Like I worked very hard at public speaking, something I

782
00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:34,480
Speaker 2: already was quite good at. And so I think, if

783
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:36,240
Speaker 2: people think I want to do my own thing, have

784
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:37,959
Speaker 2: a think about what is something you are very very

785
00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:40,320
Speaker 2: good at and does the world need it? Like is

786
00:33:40,360 --> 00:33:42,280
Speaker 2: there a dollar in it as well? Like there's always

787
00:33:42,280 --> 00:33:45,520
Speaker 2: a commercial reality of this stuff. So I felt like, yes,

788
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:47,480
Speaker 2: there's a need to talk about mental health in a

789
00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:51,640
Speaker 2: very different, refreshing, lighthearted, kind of not all lighthearted, but

790
00:33:51,720 --> 00:33:55,360
Speaker 2: accessible way. And I put my blood, sweat and tears,

791
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:58,600
Speaker 2: so much tears into this program. But it was something

792
00:33:58,640 --> 00:34:00,920
Speaker 2: I was I think naturally good at, which definitely helps

793
00:34:00,920 --> 00:34:01,240
Speaker 2: a lot.

794
00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:04,880
Speaker 1: I think there's so much in that, like, particularly when

795
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,320
Speaker 1: I was rereading the book the second time, actually i'd

796
00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:09,920
Speaker 1: forgotten how much of the timeline was way earlier than

797
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:13,319
Speaker 1: I thought, because you do sort of forget when you're

798
00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:16,279
Speaker 1: describing it like it just took off. But actually, this

799
00:34:16,320 --> 00:34:18,359
Speaker 1: is why I love having these conversations, because it didn't

800
00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:20,719
Speaker 1: really just take off. You had to stick at it

801
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:24,879
Speaker 1: for a long time and believe. And this is when

802
00:34:24,920 --> 00:34:27,640
Speaker 1: you believe you've got a good idea when people reject it,

803
00:34:27,680 --> 00:34:30,600
Speaker 1: like it takes an enormous amount of resilience to still

804
00:34:30,640 --> 00:34:33,400
Speaker 1: believe that you will find people who will be the

805
00:34:33,440 --> 00:34:35,360
Speaker 1: right people who will believe that it's a good idea.

806
00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:38,640
Speaker 1: And often when you're ahead of the curve in redefining

807
00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:40,840
Speaker 1: a way of thinking or a product or a service,

808
00:34:41,160 --> 00:34:42,680
Speaker 1: you will get a lot of rejections at the start

809
00:34:42,680 --> 00:34:45,440
Speaker 1: because it is so different. So I think it's so

810
00:34:45,520 --> 00:34:48,000
Speaker 1: important to remember that most people who do something differently

811
00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:50,759
Speaker 1: do face a couple of years often of it not

812
00:34:50,840 --> 00:34:51,800
Speaker 1: going too well.

813
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:54,200
Speaker 2: And just sticking with it, yeahal and.

814
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:56,360
Speaker 1: Being able to push through that self doubt of like, actually,

815
00:34:56,440 --> 00:34:58,160
Speaker 1: I think this is what the world needs. It just

816
00:34:58,200 --> 00:35:00,719
Speaker 1: doesn't realize it yet. H. But then also at the

817
00:35:00,760 --> 00:35:02,720
Speaker 1: other end of the spectrum, most people in the beginning

818
00:35:02,760 --> 00:35:04,960
Speaker 1: of their journey also then when it does take off,

819
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:08,080
Speaker 1: go the other end of the spectrum completely can't say

820
00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:09,799
Speaker 1: no because they've been a yes person to get there

821
00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:12,160
Speaker 1: and then burn it out completely. And I think those

822
00:35:12,600 --> 00:35:14,399
Speaker 1: both of those sides of stuff you don't hear about

823
00:35:14,440 --> 00:35:15,960
Speaker 1: as much in the telling of the story.

824
00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:18,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree with that, and I there's so many

825
00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:20,719
Speaker 2: things in that, Like I for two years I did

826
00:35:20,760 --> 00:35:23,799
Speaker 2: emergency teaching three days a week or two days a week.

827
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 2: That is the loneliest, most brutal existence on the earth.

828
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:29,000
Speaker 2: Like you think about when you're at school and an emergency

829
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,480
Speaker 2: teacher turns up. You just go, we are going to

830
00:35:31,600 --> 00:35:35,480
Speaker 2: ruin this person's day. We're going to ruin this. We've

831
00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:37,520
Speaker 2: got the next hour to ruin this individual. We don't

832
00:35:37,520 --> 00:35:39,440
Speaker 2: care who they are. And so I did that for

833
00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:41,279
Speaker 2: like three days a week to try and pay the

834
00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:42,960
Speaker 2: bills while I was trying to make this work. So

835
00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:46,880
Speaker 2: it wasn't just like swinming around to corporate functions and

836
00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:49,799
Speaker 2: being a keynote speaker, like and then you finish, like

837
00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:51,600
Speaker 2: you'd finish a talk, the one talk out for a

838
00:35:51,600 --> 00:35:54,400
Speaker 2: week and then just like you by yourself. I like

839
00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:57,040
Speaker 2: my office was my bedroom and I'd go home and go, okay,

840
00:35:57,320 --> 00:36:01,319
Speaker 2: that was that cool. And it's pretty lonely, and like

841
00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:03,440
Speaker 2: as I said, I don't think I've admitted this before

842
00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:05,160
Speaker 2: any of the chats I've done, but there were there

843
00:36:05,160 --> 00:36:07,360
Speaker 2: are two or three times I tried to get out.

844
00:36:07,680 --> 00:36:09,839
Speaker 2: If I got those jobs, like I wouldn't be doing

845
00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:12,839
Speaker 2: this right now. And this is speaking in Melbourne on

846
00:36:13,120 --> 00:36:15,360
Speaker 2: last Friday night. I think Abby was actually there on

847
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:18,799
Speaker 2: Friday night at at the Convention Center. It's twenty four

848
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:22,360
Speaker 2: hundred people and I had him for two hours. It

849
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:23,719
Speaker 2: was only meant to go for an hour of twenty,

850
00:36:23,719 --> 00:36:25,360
Speaker 2: but I was so good I just kept going. But

851
00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:27,759
Speaker 2: I was sitting backstage before and Mum said, hey, Mum,

852
00:36:27,800 --> 00:36:29,160
Speaker 2: message He said, how are you feeling? And I wrote

853
00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:30,880
Speaker 2: back and said, it's pretty amazing. I'm actually living my

854
00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:33,200
Speaker 2: dream right now, like this is getting up and standing

855
00:36:33,360 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 2: up in front of an audience like this, this is

856
00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:38,920
Speaker 2: a dream come true. There are so many times that

857
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:41,520
Speaker 2: I tried to get out to not pursue it, and

858
00:36:41,520 --> 00:36:44,839
Speaker 2: I was heartbroken. So it's funny you just I don't know.

859
00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:47,360
Speaker 2: I feel like, I mean, here's the other thing, the

860
00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:49,240
Speaker 2: other thing you brought up, which I think is really fascinating.

861
00:36:49,280 --> 00:36:51,600
Speaker 2: His feedback when people say no to and you get

862
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:54,640
Speaker 2: told no or you have people giving your negative feedback,

863
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:56,399
Speaker 2: and this is I think this is quite a well

864
00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:58,440
Speaker 2: known set of quote, but like everyone will want to

865
00:36:58,440 --> 00:37:00,879
Speaker 2: give your feedback, Like everyone wants to feedback, and whether

866
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:02,799
Speaker 2: it's people you know or you don't know, and if

867
00:37:02,840 --> 00:37:05,319
Speaker 2: it's not someone you go to for advice to me,

868
00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:07,719
Speaker 2: like I don't give a fuck what you think. I mean,

869
00:37:07,760 --> 00:37:10,400
Speaker 2: I do. No, No, that's not true. I do. I

870
00:37:10,719 --> 00:37:12,239
Speaker 2: do give a fuck with it. I don't want to,

871
00:37:12,280 --> 00:37:13,520
Speaker 2: but I can't help it. But I'm not going to

872
00:37:13,600 --> 00:37:15,759
Speaker 2: take it on board. So this is I listened to

873
00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:18,879
Speaker 2: a podcast with Jerry Seinfeld and he said this thing

874
00:37:18,920 --> 00:37:21,000
Speaker 2: that I So there's a chapter in the book which

875
00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:22,800
Speaker 2: you would have read a few times now called dealing

876
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:25,080
Speaker 2: with Critics or dealing with Criticism. I come on what

877
00:37:25,080 --> 00:37:27,279
Speaker 2: we called it, and it was all about how like

878
00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:29,360
Speaker 2: basically the way we can deal with people saying negative

879
00:37:29,360 --> 00:37:30,759
Speaker 2: stuff about us, and how we just got to step

880
00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:32,440
Speaker 2: over and move past it and we're better than it.

881
00:37:32,440 --> 00:37:35,279
Speaker 2: And Brenda Brown's thing about like you know, let it drop,

882
00:37:35,360 --> 00:37:36,879
Speaker 2: let it fall to your feet and then step over

883
00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:38,359
Speaker 2: and all that kind of stuff, and I love that.

884
00:37:38,600 --> 00:37:41,520
Speaker 2: But when I listened to Jerry Seinfeld's take on feedback,

885
00:37:41,560 --> 00:37:44,560
Speaker 2: I was like, gosh, I don't actually live and breathe

886
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:47,040
Speaker 2: what I wrote in that chapter, Like I want to.

887
00:37:47,080 --> 00:37:49,200
Speaker 2: I wish I didn't care what people thought. I wish

888
00:37:49,200 --> 00:37:50,840
Speaker 2: I was like, well, I don't know. You say I

889
00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:53,239
Speaker 2: don't care, but I do. And this I've realized it's

890
00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:55,359
Speaker 2: actually fueled me massively. I've had quite a few people

891
00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:57,880
Speaker 2: have the journey. You say stuff like, there's another organization

892
00:37:58,040 --> 00:38:00,960
Speaker 2: in a similar space to us, said to me, we're

893
00:38:00,960 --> 00:38:03,000
Speaker 2: already doing curriculum. I don't get why you're doing curriculum.

894
00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:06,000
Speaker 2: Your curriculum is not great anyway, because we've actually think

895
00:38:06,080 --> 00:38:07,600
Speaker 2: this is not good with the curriculum. That's not good

896
00:38:07,600 --> 00:38:10,360
Speaker 2: with your curriculum. Our curriculum is already in school, so

897
00:38:10,480 --> 00:38:13,520
Speaker 2: you actually shouldn't be doing this. And I was so hurt.

898
00:38:13,719 --> 00:38:16,319
Speaker 2: This is what happened. I was so hurt. For like

899
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,320
Speaker 2: a week, I reckon by there. I thought that'd be

900
00:38:18,360 --> 00:38:20,719
Speaker 2: good people who'd support what I was doing. I was

901
00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:22,640
Speaker 2: so hurt by it, and I was so shattered by it.

902
00:38:23,040 --> 00:38:24,560
Speaker 2: And then the next week I kind of just let

903
00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:27,560
Speaker 2: that sink in, and two weeks by two weeks, I

904
00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:31,080
Speaker 2: was like fuck that, Like, because of you guys, I'm

905
00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:34,320
Speaker 2: going to make our curriculum so much better than yours.

906
00:38:34,600 --> 00:38:36,680
Speaker 2: And it drove me to our curriculum is now, when

907
00:38:36,719 --> 00:38:38,799
Speaker 2: we've got three hundred thousand kids around the country doing

908
00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:42,200
Speaker 2: our curriculum every single day. I employed five writers to

909
00:38:42,239 --> 00:38:45,160
Speaker 2: come in and actually rewrite the different elements of our

910
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:47,560
Speaker 2: curriculum We've got now, I got a full time lady

911
00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:50,640
Speaker 2: called Lea who is amazing, who just does this full over.

912
00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:54,360
Speaker 2: Our curriculum can always changing it, always up there, always

913
00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:56,640
Speaker 2: making it better. If it wasn't for those people who

914
00:38:56,640 --> 00:38:59,560
Speaker 2: told me they thought the curriculum wasn't good, it wouldn't

915
00:38:59,560 --> 00:39:01,600
Speaker 2: be what it is now. And so I think sometimes

916
00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:03,920
Speaker 2: you've got to if you're the person who in like,

917
00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:06,520
Speaker 2: if you care what people think about you, that's also

918
00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:08,160
Speaker 2: why you're doing really well in life, because it's a

919
00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:10,440
Speaker 2: nice like. It shows that you're you know, you're a

920
00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:13,040
Speaker 2: human being. You're sensitive where all can be sensitive. Let

921
00:39:13,080 --> 00:39:16,279
Speaker 2: it hurt you, let that happen, and then be strong

922
00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:18,239
Speaker 2: enough to just cop it in the face. And then

923
00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:21,120
Speaker 2: you a couple of weeks you say, Okay, fuck you

924
00:39:21,920 --> 00:39:24,000
Speaker 2: because of what you said. I'm going to make this

925
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:25,880
Speaker 2: whatever it is, I'm going to grow because of what

926
00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:28,280
Speaker 2: you've said. And I realized, looking back, that's what's happened

927
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:32,880
Speaker 2: to me. I've been driven by people's hurtful comments so

928
00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:35,160
Speaker 2: many times. I've got countless examples.

929
00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:38,279
Speaker 1: And it's funny how I talk on the podcast so

930
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:40,520
Speaker 1: much about self doubt and your in a critic and

931
00:39:40,520 --> 00:39:44,160
Speaker 1: negative self talk is so destructive. But actually, what I

932
00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:46,319
Speaker 1: haven't spoken about as much, but you've made me really

933
00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:48,200
Speaker 1: reflect on, is that it's not just self doubt, it's

934
00:39:48,239 --> 00:39:51,120
Speaker 1: actual just external doubt, like there will be people along

935
00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:52,719
Speaker 1: the way who don't believe in what you do. And

936
00:39:53,400 --> 00:39:55,759
Speaker 1: I also think you know that quote that comes back

937
00:39:55,800 --> 00:39:57,759
Speaker 1: all the time of like sometimes not getting you want,

938
00:39:58,160 --> 00:40:00,359
Speaker 1: not getting what you want is a brilliant stroke of luck,

939
00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:03,719
Speaker 1: the fact that you weren't allowed to get out if

940
00:40:03,719 --> 00:40:05,440
Speaker 1: you had been, if we'd have been up to you

941
00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:08,080
Speaker 1: the Resilience Project, we would have all been deprived of

942
00:40:08,080 --> 00:40:10,160
Speaker 1: that in the world. And I think sometimes like it's

943
00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:12,680
Speaker 1: not just self doubt, it's also external doubt that you're

944
00:40:12,719 --> 00:40:14,880
Speaker 1: going to get But that doesn't mean that it's not

945
00:40:14,880 --> 00:40:16,879
Speaker 1: a good idea. It doesn't mean that what you're doing

946
00:40:16,920 --> 00:40:19,480
Speaker 1: isn't a value. It just means that those particular people

947
00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:22,560
Speaker 1: aren't your people. But if you hadn't, if the world

948
00:40:22,680 --> 00:40:25,439
Speaker 1: hadn't conspired to make sure that this program came out,

949
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:27,759
Speaker 1: you could have easily been toppled and it never would

950
00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:30,000
Speaker 1: have seen the light of day. So I think if

951
00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:33,800
Speaker 1: anyone is in that early phase where they're doubting themselves

952
00:40:33,840 --> 00:40:37,000
Speaker 1: and have people around them doubting you. It's not the

953
00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:38,719
Speaker 1: be all and end all. That doesn't mean that you

954
00:40:38,719 --> 00:40:40,799
Speaker 1: should stop in your tracks, like go and find other

955
00:40:40,840 --> 00:40:42,919
Speaker 1: people who do think it's a good idea and make

956
00:40:42,960 --> 00:40:45,480
Speaker 1: those the people that you surround yourself with, and like

957
00:40:45,520 --> 00:40:48,520
Speaker 1: you said, turn that external doubt into fuel totally, Like

958
00:40:48,880 --> 00:40:51,000
Speaker 1: you know, it can be something that fuels you. It's

959
00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:54,200
Speaker 1: not that you ever want self doubt or overall doubt

960
00:40:54,280 --> 00:40:56,279
Speaker 1: to go away. I agree. I think it's a sign

961
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:58,480
Speaker 1: that you're not complacent and you're invested enough to care

962
00:40:58,520 --> 00:41:01,959
Speaker 1: about doing a good job and filling an actual gap

963
00:41:02,000 --> 00:41:04,319
Speaker 1: and providing a good service. But just don't let it

964
00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:05,320
Speaker 1: dictate your decisions.

965
00:41:05,440 --> 00:41:07,880
Speaker 2: Totally, totally. I love that so much, and I mean

966
00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:09,680
Speaker 2: that I also loved it. I don't know that you

967
00:41:09,719 --> 00:41:11,680
Speaker 2: talk a lot about like you're in a critic and

968
00:41:11,719 --> 00:41:14,920
Speaker 2: your negative self talk, and like I have that all

969
00:41:14,960 --> 00:41:18,279
Speaker 2: the time. Like we started the national tour last week

970
00:41:18,320 --> 00:41:20,439
Speaker 2: in Adelaide. We had two nights in Adelaide, then Perth

971
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:22,680
Speaker 2: and Melbourne. The half an hour before I went on

972
00:41:22,719 --> 00:41:25,560
Speaker 2: stage in Adelaide night one, I almost started writing down

973
00:41:25,600 --> 00:41:27,240
Speaker 2: the stuff. I was thinking, like this is just funny,

974
00:41:27,239 --> 00:41:30,160
Speaker 2: Like this is getting ridiculous. Like I was thinking, this

975
00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 2: is you haven't done this in a year, you will

976
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:34,160
Speaker 2: have forgotten how to do this. Who are you to

977
00:41:34,239 --> 00:41:35,880
Speaker 2: be speaking to all these people? Why have all those

978
00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:37,480
Speaker 2: people given up a night to come and speak to you.

979
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:39,719
Speaker 2: It was like it was so brutal what I was

980
00:41:39,719 --> 00:41:41,600
Speaker 2: telling myself. And then I'd have those moments of like,

981
00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:43,640
Speaker 2: shut up, what are you like? This is what you

982
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:45,600
Speaker 2: love doing, This is your favorite thing in the world

983
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:47,439
Speaker 2: to do, and now you're dreading it. And then part

984
00:41:47,440 --> 00:41:49,080
Speaker 2: of me is like you could go home, Like you

985
00:41:49,120 --> 00:41:50,680
Speaker 2: could go back to the hotel, you could just get

986
00:41:50,680 --> 00:41:52,720
Speaker 2: in a car and go, and like you're probably saving

987
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:54,120
Speaker 2: these people an hour and a half of their life

988
00:41:54,160 --> 00:41:56,120
Speaker 2: if you do that. So like you're in a critic

989
00:41:56,160 --> 00:41:57,880
Speaker 2: you can get out of control. So I was especially

990
00:41:57,920 --> 00:42:00,359
Speaker 2: my wife and I go, I'm not in a very

991
00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:02,840
Speaker 2: confident headspace right now, and she's like, wellmo'st wrong, And

992
00:42:02,840 --> 00:42:05,279
Speaker 2: I was like, well, it's not ideal sixteen hundred people

993
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:07,600
Speaker 2: sitting outside waiting for me. Anyway, it turned out to

994
00:42:07,640 --> 00:42:10,720
Speaker 2: be fine, but yeah, negative self talks, it's brutal.

995
00:42:11,080 --> 00:42:13,240
Speaker 1: And something I loved from the book, which I imagine

996
00:42:13,280 --> 00:42:14,960
Speaker 1: if something Penny says to you all the time is

997
00:42:15,040 --> 00:42:19,080
Speaker 1: actually by you letting yourself doubt overcome you, it's actually

998
00:42:19,239 --> 00:42:22,000
Speaker 1: selfish because you are depriving the people who are out

999
00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 1: there who need to hear your particular message, which is

1000
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:26,480
Speaker 1: why they're there. The fact that you didn't even want

1001
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:28,319
Speaker 1: to write a book because you were like, oh, what

1002
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:29,719
Speaker 1: have I got to say? Like how is this going

1003
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:31,560
Speaker 1: to be useful? And Penny sat you down it was like,

1004
00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:34,600
Speaker 1: that's Selfishue. You are depriving the world of a book

1005
00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:37,359
Speaker 1: that they need, which now, as you know, if you're

1006
00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:38,840
Speaker 1: writing a second one, I mean you're gonna have to

1007
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:40,920
Speaker 1: tell the printer that Abby and I need one print

1008
00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:43,439
Speaker 1: run and everyone else in the world needs another one.

1009
00:42:45,280 --> 00:42:47,279
Speaker 1: There is always someone out there in the world who

1010
00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:50,160
Speaker 1: needs exactly what you have. So by you letting yourself

1011
00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:52,440
Speaker 1: out overcome you, it's a selfish act because you're depriving

1012
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:55,239
Speaker 1: the universe of your special skill which no one else

1013
00:42:55,280 --> 00:42:58,360
Speaker 1: can even if other people had come up with the

1014
00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:02,920
Speaker 1: you know, gratitude, empathy, the mindfulness matrix or methodology, like

1015
00:43:02,960 --> 00:43:06,239
Speaker 1: the way you deliver it with your unique you know

1016
00:43:06,360 --> 00:43:10,759
Speaker 1: wit and self deprecation and storytelling, Like even if someone

1017
00:43:10,800 --> 00:43:12,600
Speaker 1: did the exact same thing and use the exact same wording,

1018
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:14,359
Speaker 1: they still wouldn't deliver it in the way you did.

1019
00:43:14,400 --> 00:43:16,560
Speaker 1: So by you not doing that, you are depriving the

1020
00:43:16,560 --> 00:43:17,640
Speaker 1: world of something special.

1021
00:43:17,920 --> 00:43:20,200
Speaker 2: So I think that's that's very nicesome to say that.

1022
00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:23,600
Speaker 2: I but you make a good point when it's about

1023
00:43:23,640 --> 00:43:26,320
Speaker 2: other people, not yourself. Ben Crow, who a lot of

1024
00:43:26,320 --> 00:43:29,319
Speaker 2: people about. Ben Cardamone amazing man, says when you are

1025
00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:33,520
Speaker 2: interested rather than interesting, when that's your focus, life becomes

1026
00:43:33,560 --> 00:43:36,280
Speaker 2: really beautiful. And it's very true, very true.

1027
00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:39,200
Speaker 1: Another thing I found really interesting reading is that, And

1028
00:43:39,239 --> 00:43:41,480
Speaker 1: it's so funny because I say this exact thing is

1029
00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:43,319
Speaker 1: I've gone from being a corporate where I had like

1030
00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:45,279
Speaker 1: not just a five year plan, but a fifty year

1031
00:43:45,280 --> 00:43:47,799
Speaker 1: plan really to not having a five minute plan. So

1032
00:43:47,880 --> 00:43:49,680
Speaker 1: reading that you have no five year plan but a

1033
00:43:49,719 --> 00:43:51,920
Speaker 1: moment to moment plan, I was like, Yeah, here's my people.

1034
00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:58,200
Speaker 1: We are in a society where that relentless forward motion

1035
00:43:58,560 --> 00:44:03,839
Speaker 1: and progress and next and bigger is quite irresistible and

1036
00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:06,400
Speaker 1: growing a movement now that is so large, I mean,

1037
00:44:06,400 --> 00:44:09,800
Speaker 1: you sold out the convention center three times over. Meanwhile,

1038
00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:11,839
Speaker 1: you're doubting that you'd even get a couple of people there.

1039
00:44:12,600 --> 00:44:15,120
Speaker 1: What is next? And how do you do you have

1040
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:18,960
Speaker 1: to resist that it's become bigger than you and sometimes

1041
00:44:19,080 --> 00:44:21,520
Speaker 1: is growing faster than you can control. Or you know,

1042
00:44:21,560 --> 00:44:23,560
Speaker 1: what are your big goals for what's next? Or are

1043
00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:25,880
Speaker 1: you just happy to sort of let things unravel and

1044
00:44:25,920 --> 00:44:27,239
Speaker 1: see see where it goes.

1045
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:30,680
Speaker 2: It's a great question because I don't I haven't really

1046
00:44:30,680 --> 00:44:33,160
Speaker 2: thought about it too much. Like, I mean, I have

1047
00:44:33,200 --> 00:44:36,359
Speaker 2: a team of sixteen seventeen people here seventeen now, and

1048
00:44:36,800 --> 00:44:39,279
Speaker 2: there's a couple of people here whose full time job

1049
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:41,839
Speaker 2: is what's next for us? Like, what are we doing next?

1050
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:45,960
Speaker 2: What is our strategic plan? With an incredible girl, Kim

1051
00:44:46,040 --> 00:44:48,640
Speaker 2: Smiley who just joined us, who she's all about us,

1052
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:51,960
Speaker 2: toreet strategic plan for the next three to five years.

1053
00:44:52,040 --> 00:44:55,120
Speaker 2: So but for me personally, I've never thought about it.

1054
00:44:55,160 --> 00:44:57,120
Speaker 2: I just and you've read this in the book, but

1055
00:44:57,160 --> 00:45:01,720
Speaker 2: I really feel like if you properly nail every moment

1056
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:03,919
Speaker 2: that you're in while you're in it, like really give

1057
00:45:03,920 --> 00:45:07,800
Speaker 2: it your full respect and attention and effort, then life

1058
00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:10,279
Speaker 2: will kind of take care of itself. So I know

1059
00:45:10,280 --> 00:45:11,520
Speaker 2: I write that in the book, and I thought, oh,

1060
00:45:11,520 --> 00:45:13,759
Speaker 2: but I'm sure for a lot of people there's huge

1061
00:45:13,760 --> 00:45:16,120
Speaker 2: benefit in having a five year plan, and I certainly

1062
00:45:16,160 --> 00:45:18,520
Speaker 2: wasn't saying to people, don't go and do your five

1063
00:45:18,600 --> 00:45:20,080
Speaker 2: year plan or whatever it is. I think it's good

1064
00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:22,759
Speaker 2: to have that. But for me, what works best is

1065
00:45:22,880 --> 00:45:24,799
Speaker 2: just to be good and be as good as you

1066
00:45:24,840 --> 00:45:28,640
Speaker 2: can at each moment. And it's hard, and even saying that,

1067
00:45:29,040 --> 00:45:30,440
Speaker 2: I feel like a little bit of a fraud in

1068
00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:32,400
Speaker 2: the area of my life that I care most about,

1069
00:45:32,480 --> 00:45:38,600
Speaker 2: like my kids. Sorry, oh no, I need to apologize.

1070
00:45:38,640 --> 00:45:40,480
Speaker 2: Like my kids. I need to get better at that,

1071
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:43,360
Speaker 2: really showing up for them, like I'm running around a

1072
00:45:43,400 --> 00:45:46,040
Speaker 2: country do earliest talk, which is great and I think

1073
00:45:46,080 --> 00:45:48,080
Speaker 2: one day they'll be quite proud of that. But what

1074
00:45:48,160 --> 00:45:50,319
Speaker 2: they see right now is that I'm not a home enough.

1075
00:45:50,800 --> 00:45:54,040
Speaker 2: And when I am home, like my phone's going berserk,

1076
00:45:54,080 --> 00:45:57,000
Speaker 2: and it's like trying to keep up with his emails

1077
00:45:57,040 --> 00:46:01,239
Speaker 2: and Slack messages and Instagram dms and the penie. A

1078
00:46:01,280 --> 00:46:04,080
Speaker 2: long chat that went out we went out for dinner

1079
00:46:04,120 --> 00:46:06,000
Speaker 2: on Saturday night, and a long chat about like we've

1080
00:46:06,000 --> 00:46:07,920
Speaker 2: got to we need to get better at this like

1081
00:46:07,960 --> 00:46:09,920
Speaker 2: we need to between five and eight, we're just going

1082
00:46:09,960 --> 00:46:13,080
Speaker 2: to keep our phones in the car because we Yeah,

1083
00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:14,880
Speaker 2: why am I even going down this path? Oh that's right.

1084
00:46:14,920 --> 00:46:18,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, well actually that was my next question anyway, that

1085
00:46:19,200 --> 00:46:21,839
Speaker 1: the paradox of doing something that you love and having

1086
00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:25,200
Speaker 1: a message that's so important is that the proliferation of

1087
00:46:25,200 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 1: that message then sometimes becomes more important than the message itself,

1088
00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:31,640
Speaker 1: which I think is the irony of many people who

1089
00:46:31,680 --> 00:46:35,720
Speaker 1: work in the area of yeah, wellness or mental health

1090
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:40,719
Speaker 1: or you know, resilience, or any kind of self betterment

1091
00:46:41,400 --> 00:46:44,120
Speaker 1: area of life. And I was going to ask, you know,

1092
00:46:44,200 --> 00:46:46,759
Speaker 1: how do you find that balance between I came into

1093
00:46:46,760 --> 00:46:48,920
Speaker 1: this because I wanted to teach people about the importance

1094
00:46:48,960 --> 00:46:51,799
Speaker 1: of mindfulness and putting your phone away. There's a whole

1095
00:46:51,840 --> 00:46:54,360
Speaker 1: chapter on social media and how to manage that in

1096
00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:56,600
Speaker 1: your life, but for you to deliver that message, you

1097
00:46:56,640 --> 00:46:58,880
Speaker 1: have to be on that platform, and that paradox is

1098
00:46:58,920 --> 00:46:59,759
Speaker 1: really confusing.

1099
00:47:00,600 --> 00:47:02,160
Speaker 2: Just as a side note, I love the command you

1100
00:47:02,160 --> 00:47:06,120
Speaker 2: have of the English language. It's very impressive. Ah, I

1101
00:47:06,800 --> 00:47:09,360
Speaker 2: really liked washing to speak. I was just reminded of

1102
00:47:09,440 --> 00:47:12,279
Speaker 2: that as you were speaking then. But I think I

1103
00:47:12,400 --> 00:47:14,759
Speaker 2: go through stages where I'm really good with my kids

1104
00:47:14,800 --> 00:47:18,720
Speaker 2: and really practice what I preach, but I do find

1105
00:47:18,800 --> 00:47:21,800
Speaker 2: moments where you know, I'll be seeing the dinner table

1106
00:47:22,520 --> 00:47:24,319
Speaker 2: and five minutes later, I realized I haven't listened to

1107
00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:28,799
Speaker 2: it anyone search because I've just done a talk to

1108
00:47:29,480 --> 00:47:32,840
Speaker 2: wherever it is, Like, I remember, we had an amazing,

1109
00:47:33,480 --> 00:47:36,560
Speaker 2: amazing forty eight hours of Port Adelaide Football Club. I

1110
00:47:36,640 --> 00:47:39,239
Speaker 2: was just I wasing from when I came home, and

1111
00:47:39,320 --> 00:47:41,560
Speaker 2: it was all about what I was changing about was

1112
00:47:41,640 --> 00:47:44,120
Speaker 2: just like just just enjoy the little moments to pop

1113
00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:46,080
Speaker 2: up because and they're all talking about the moments that

1114
00:47:46,120 --> 00:47:47,880
Speaker 2: they are so lucky to have, so grateful to have,

1115
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:50,080
Speaker 2: and I was joining in and some really vulnerable stuff

1116
00:47:50,080 --> 00:47:52,040
Speaker 2: in there. And then I'm seeing around the dinner table

1117
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:54,680
Speaker 2: with my family and I'm just still thinking about the

1118
00:47:54,719 --> 00:47:56,520
Speaker 2: session with the Port Adelaide guys and I'm thinking about

1119
00:47:56,520 --> 00:47:58,880
Speaker 2: their stories, and I was like, no, come on, like

1120
00:47:58,920 --> 00:48:01,040
Speaker 2: this is exactly what spent for. Like you've been there,

1121
00:48:01,040 --> 00:48:03,239
Speaker 2: You've had that experience. It was great, But these are

1122
00:48:03,239 --> 00:48:04,839
Speaker 2: the people in needgy in most right now, and here

1123
00:48:04,880 --> 00:48:08,520
Speaker 2: you are thinking about Port Adelaide Football Club. So I

1124
00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:10,560
Speaker 2: think I do pretty well with it. I mean, there's

1125
00:48:10,560 --> 00:48:12,120
Speaker 2: going to be a stage as well in my life

1126
00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:14,319
Speaker 2: where Penny and I have always said that it is

1127
00:48:14,360 --> 00:48:18,120
Speaker 2: so unfair that she Penny's so career driven, She's so

1128
00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:21,280
Speaker 2: intelligent and has so much to offer the world. Right now,

1129
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:24,439
Speaker 2: she's offering everything. She has two kids and home, and

1130
00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:26,680
Speaker 2: there will be a point where she goes to work

1131
00:48:26,719 --> 00:48:30,880
Speaker 2: and I'm a full time dad, and so I have

1132
00:48:30,960 --> 00:48:32,319
Speaker 2: that thing in my head at well, like, well, I've

1133
00:48:32,360 --> 00:48:34,400
Speaker 2: got another three or four years to give work everything,

1134
00:48:34,400 --> 00:48:36,440
Speaker 2: and then there'll be a point where it is my

1135
00:48:36,560 --> 00:48:38,120
Speaker 2: job to stay at home and she goes and pursues

1136
00:48:38,200 --> 00:48:40,120
Speaker 2: her career. So there's also that in the back of

1137
00:48:40,120 --> 00:48:43,160
Speaker 2: my mind of like we'll give it everything now, but

1138
00:48:43,160 --> 00:48:44,960
Speaker 2: then these are such beautiful years. A four year old,

1139
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:47,560
Speaker 2: the one year old. I mean, it's hard, but it's beautiful.

1140
00:48:47,680 --> 00:48:50,280
Speaker 2: Like it's just like our one year old daughter. This morning,

1141
00:48:50,960 --> 00:48:53,239
Speaker 2: we're all seeing on the couch and she crawled over

1142
00:48:53,239 --> 00:48:56,000
Speaker 2: the three of us. This is like for twenty minutes

1143
00:48:56,040 --> 00:48:58,760
Speaker 2: and kissing all. She'd go mut m and she'd kiss

1144
00:48:58,800 --> 00:49:01,080
Speaker 2: many that. She kissed me and Benji and she gets

1145
00:49:01,080 --> 00:49:02,719
Speaker 2: Penny and we were just laughing at it. When she's

1146
00:49:02,719 --> 00:49:05,320
Speaker 2: going to stop, and she just kept doing it, do it,

1147
00:49:05,360 --> 00:49:06,839
Speaker 2: And I was like, yeah, we didn't get much sleep

1148
00:49:06,880 --> 00:49:09,080
Speaker 2: last night because of her, But my gosh, this is special.

1149
00:49:09,160 --> 00:49:11,399
Speaker 2: Like she just kissed me twenty times the last half

1150
00:49:11,440 --> 00:49:12,960
Speaker 2: an hour. She's not going to stop, Like we're gonna

1151
00:49:12,960 --> 00:49:14,000
Speaker 2: have to stop it. She can't stop it.

1152
00:49:14,520 --> 00:49:15,920
Speaker 1: She's got like red raw lips and.

1153
00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:20,600
Speaker 2: Exactly. So I don't even know what I was talking about,

1154
00:49:20,640 --> 00:49:23,000
Speaker 2: but I think it's a.

1155
00:49:23,000 --> 00:49:25,960
Speaker 1: Juggle, right, everyone's struggling priorities and no one gets it right.

1156
00:49:26,200 --> 00:49:29,279
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, And I feel like with this national tour

1157
00:49:29,360 --> 00:49:31,960
Speaker 2: and me away from home a lot, I just got

1158
00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:33,799
Speaker 2: to make sure. Like my mom said to me, it's

1159
00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:36,080
Speaker 2: a beautiful message. She pulled me up. I was on

1160
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:39,040
Speaker 2: my phone in front of the kids, and she said

1161
00:49:39,280 --> 00:49:42,319
Speaker 2: something like you're not home enough as it is, like

1162
00:49:42,360 --> 00:49:44,160
Speaker 2: when you're here, you can at least And I said, nah,

1163
00:49:44,239 --> 00:49:46,160
Speaker 2: you're right, and she said, no, bit. I know you

1164
00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:49,040
Speaker 2: talk about the impact on the kids, but I like

1165
00:49:49,120 --> 00:49:51,279
Speaker 2: you're missing out. You're the one, she said, because when

1166
00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:52,920
Speaker 2: I was your age and he was and you were

1167
00:49:52,960 --> 00:49:55,520
Speaker 2: his age. My mom said to me, I saw everything

1168
00:49:55,560 --> 00:49:58,200
Speaker 2: you saw. I smelled everything you smelled. I heard everything

1169
00:49:58,200 --> 00:49:59,680
Speaker 2: you heard. I was there with you, and because of that,

1170
00:49:59,760 --> 00:50:02,080
Speaker 2: now I have so many moments of joy. You know.

1171
00:50:02,080 --> 00:50:05,200
Speaker 2: I walk past the jasmine bush and like, I'm almost

1172
00:50:05,239 --> 00:50:07,319
Speaker 2: in tears of joy because I remember when you're a kid,

1173
00:50:07,760 --> 00:50:10,080
Speaker 2: you're so obsessed with the smell of jasmin bushes. So

1174
00:50:10,120 --> 00:50:11,600
Speaker 2: we go and try and find jasmine together for you

1175
00:50:11,719 --> 00:50:14,440
Speaker 2: to smell. And she said, I have those moments now,

1176
00:50:14,440 --> 00:50:15,680
Speaker 2: but I'm not sure you're going to get those when

1177
00:50:15,680 --> 00:50:18,520
Speaker 2: you're older, because you're not properly living everything that your

1178
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:20,600
Speaker 2: son and your daughter are living like we used to do.

1179
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:24,920
Speaker 2: So my aim, and I'm saying this publicly so to

1180
00:50:24,920 --> 00:50:27,239
Speaker 2: hold myself to account, my aim is when I am

1181
00:50:27,280 --> 00:50:29,880
Speaker 2: at home, I am going to properly be there for

1182
00:50:29,920 --> 00:50:30,719
Speaker 2: the rest of this year.

1183
00:50:31,120 --> 00:50:35,279
Speaker 1: Oh that's really beautiful, But it's a process, right, Like

1184
00:50:35,320 --> 00:50:37,800
Speaker 1: that kind of prioritization doesn't happen by itself.

1185
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:39,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think the best thing for me is to

1186
00:50:39,760 --> 00:50:41,160
Speaker 2: leave my phone in the car. I know for me

1187
00:50:41,280 --> 00:50:43,600
Speaker 2: that works. Leave my phone in the car and when

1188
00:50:43,600 --> 00:50:44,919
Speaker 2: I get home and I can get it out again

1189
00:50:44,920 --> 00:50:45,960
Speaker 2: after the kids are gone to bed.

1190
00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:49,640
Speaker 1: I just had a week in the Northern Territory and

1191
00:50:49,680 --> 00:50:52,640
Speaker 1: we didn't have any signal, but also no charges, so

1192
00:50:52,680 --> 00:50:56,880
Speaker 1: we had, oh, well time, no clocks. The indigenous culture

1193
00:50:56,920 --> 00:50:59,680
Speaker 1: has no concept for time, so they believe you wake

1194
00:50:59,719 --> 00:51:02,120
Speaker 1: upunrise and you go to bed at sunset. And we

1195
00:51:02,120 --> 00:51:04,560
Speaker 1: were forced to surrender to not having even knowing what

1196
00:51:04,560 --> 00:51:11,080
Speaker 1: time it was, and it was the most enjoyable, really present.

1197
00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:15,640
Speaker 1: I'm still now kind of resisting coming back to it

1198
00:51:15,719 --> 00:51:19,759
Speaker 1: because it was so freeing to not need to know

1199
00:51:20,120 --> 00:51:22,000
Speaker 1: where you are in time and space and the date,

1200
00:51:22,080 --> 00:51:24,120
Speaker 1: and like it's unrealistic obviously to be like that all

1201
00:51:24,160 --> 00:51:26,200
Speaker 1: the time. But once you kind of let go of

1202
00:51:26,200 --> 00:51:28,000
Speaker 1: your phone, you don't want to back. Like I didn't

1203
00:51:28,000 --> 00:51:28,560
Speaker 1: want it back.

1204
00:51:28,640 --> 00:51:32,480
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, yeah, totally, yeah, it's yeah, what

1205
00:51:32,520 --> 00:51:33,840
Speaker 2: a great experience that is for you.

1206
00:51:34,080 --> 00:51:35,680
Speaker 1: Oh well, now I just want more of it. I'm like,

1207
00:51:35,760 --> 00:51:37,400
Speaker 1: do I want to be a bush woman and just

1208
00:51:37,440 --> 00:51:42,279
Speaker 1: like retire into the wilderness. A little bit before we

1209
00:51:42,320 --> 00:51:45,080
Speaker 1: moved to the last section. One thing I did want

1210
00:51:45,080 --> 00:51:47,280
Speaker 1: to touch on briefly, and I think for anyone listening,

1211
00:51:47,680 --> 00:51:52,560
Speaker 1: the most impactful and powerful way to hear Hugh's take

1212
00:51:52,640 --> 00:51:55,400
Speaker 1: on mental illness and this area, which is so incredibly

1213
00:51:55,440 --> 00:51:58,520
Speaker 1: important especially now, is just to read the book because

1214
00:51:58,840 --> 00:52:01,000
Speaker 1: you mentioned me being having a good command of the

1215
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:05,040
Speaker 1: English language. The way that you describe your sister's experience

1216
00:52:05,160 --> 00:52:08,879
Speaker 1: with anorexia, your family's experience around that, and then your

1217
00:52:08,880 --> 00:52:12,400
Speaker 1: wife's OCD as well, and the way that manifest is

1218
00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:16,600
Speaker 1: so relatable. And I think if people don't know quite

1219
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:20,480
Speaker 1: how to explain the experience to someone who hasn't experienced it,

1220
00:52:20,560 --> 00:52:23,200
Speaker 1: they have no chance of having empathy towards that. But

1221
00:52:23,280 --> 00:52:25,480
Speaker 1: you explained it in a way that I felt made

1222
00:52:25,480 --> 00:52:28,520
Speaker 1: it a lot more accessible to understand as an experience.

1223
00:52:29,000 --> 00:52:33,160
Speaker 1: And once you understand empathy and you know that it's

1224
00:52:33,200 --> 00:52:36,480
Speaker 1: not you know, her trying to you know, Georgia trying

1225
00:52:36,520 --> 00:52:38,960
Speaker 1: to get attention, or she's not just being annoying for

1226
00:52:39,000 --> 00:52:41,000
Speaker 1: the sake of it, like she actually has a mental illness.

1227
00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:44,239
Speaker 1: I think the whole book just covers it in such

1228
00:52:44,320 --> 00:52:48,600
Speaker 1: a powerful and relatable way. I know it's probably not

1229
00:52:48,719 --> 00:52:50,840
Speaker 1: enough time to go into it, but is there anything

1230
00:52:50,880 --> 00:52:52,960
Speaker 1: you'd like to say about mental health at the moment?

1231
00:52:53,080 --> 00:52:54,920
Speaker 1: And I know the work you've done in football clubs

1232
00:52:54,920 --> 00:52:57,399
Speaker 1: in particular has touched a lot on how at risk

1233
00:52:58,160 --> 00:53:01,040
Speaker 1: people are these days of suicide, particularly men and how

1234
00:53:01,120 --> 00:53:03,520
Speaker 1: much the Resilience Project has helped a lot of people

1235
00:53:03,840 --> 00:53:06,920
Speaker 1: intervene at an earlier stage, just so important.

1236
00:53:07,600 --> 00:53:09,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're all about prevention. That's kind of the space

1237
00:53:09,880 --> 00:53:11,960
Speaker 2: we're in. The Mental Health Commission found that only one

1238
00:53:12,000 --> 00:53:14,960
Speaker 2: percent of funding goes towards preventive programs. It's ninety nine

1239
00:53:15,000 --> 00:53:17,440
Speaker 2: percent of funding goes towards like what happens at the

1240
00:53:17,480 --> 00:53:20,160
Speaker 2: other end when it's really bad. So we've always been

1241
00:53:20,160 --> 00:53:23,480
Speaker 2: about prevention and teaching people things I can do to

1242
00:53:23,480 --> 00:53:25,840
Speaker 2: make sure they don't go down that path. So I

1243
00:53:25,880 --> 00:53:28,279
Speaker 2: think for me, the thing I'm biggest out at the

1244
00:53:28,280 --> 00:53:32,480
Speaker 2: moment is so the whole AUOK campaign. It's a wonderful,

1245
00:53:32,719 --> 00:53:35,560
Speaker 2: a wonderful, wonderful concept, and it has done so much

1246
00:53:35,600 --> 00:53:39,000
Speaker 2: good the more that I think about it, though, I mean,

1247
00:53:39,239 --> 00:53:41,520
Speaker 2: they never I don't think their point is to say

1248
00:53:41,600 --> 00:53:44,600
Speaker 2: you need to use the words Areuoka. I think the

1249
00:53:44,640 --> 00:53:47,640
Speaker 2: words iook are a little bit intimidating for a lot

1250
00:53:47,680 --> 00:53:50,239
Speaker 2: of people. And so there's a couple of things I

1251
00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 2: want to say. I think I wrote about Luke in

1252
00:53:53,200 --> 00:53:54,640
Speaker 2: the book, and you would have known the chapter on

1253
00:53:54,760 --> 00:53:57,400
Speaker 2: you would know the chapter on Luke. A score of

1254
00:53:57,440 --> 00:54:00,239
Speaker 2: my career club who took his own life used to

1255
00:54:00,280 --> 00:54:02,560
Speaker 2: call me every month in the winter and just say Helen.

1256
00:54:02,760 --> 00:54:04,120
Speaker 2: He was an autistic man. He's held on to a

1257
00:54:04,160 --> 00:54:06,360
Speaker 2: cricket season and I'd say it's four months, and he'd go,

1258
00:54:06,440 --> 00:54:10,040
Speaker 2: that's a long time by. And and then a month later,

1259
00:54:10,040 --> 00:54:11,960
Speaker 2: I held a cricket season. It's three months. That's a

1260
00:54:11,960 --> 00:54:15,040
Speaker 2: long time bye, and he called me. He called me

1261
00:54:15,040 --> 00:54:17,080
Speaker 2: about two weeks before the season started once and said,

1262
00:54:17,080 --> 00:54:19,719
Speaker 2: Helen to cricket and I said two weeks and he

1263
00:54:19,760 --> 00:54:21,640
Speaker 2: said that that feels like a long time for me

1264
00:54:21,760 --> 00:54:24,840
Speaker 2: right now. And I remember I remember thinking to myself,

1265
00:54:24,960 --> 00:54:27,800
Speaker 2: oh shit, is he okay? That's that's a pretty grim

1266
00:54:27,840 --> 00:54:30,920
Speaker 2: thing to say. I was like, he'll probably find a

1267
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:32,560
Speaker 2: bit awkward if he's If he's totally fine, I say,

1268
00:54:32,600 --> 00:54:34,759
Speaker 2: you're okay, it's pretty bit awkward, I'll and I hung up.

1269
00:54:35,360 --> 00:54:37,120
Speaker 2: I've seen a couple of weeks and I didn't ask

1270
00:54:37,160 --> 00:54:40,560
Speaker 2: him if he was okay. And then I remember telling

1271
00:54:40,600 --> 00:54:42,839
Speaker 2: Penny and Penny and said, do you want to give

1272
00:54:42,880 --> 00:54:44,759
Speaker 2: him a buzz just check? And I said, I think

1273
00:54:44,760 --> 00:54:46,600
Speaker 2: he's fine. I think she said, well, do you want

1274
00:54:46,640 --> 00:54:48,000
Speaker 2: to catch up? But then maybe catch up with him

1275
00:54:48,040 --> 00:54:49,439
Speaker 2: and just and I said, I'll see me a couple

1276
00:54:49,440 --> 00:54:51,400
Speaker 2: of weeks, should be fine. And two days later I

1277
00:54:51,400 --> 00:54:53,040
Speaker 2: get a phone call from the president of our club

1278
00:54:53,120 --> 00:54:56,200
Speaker 2: letting me know that he'd taken his life. And I

1279
00:54:56,239 --> 00:54:58,640
Speaker 2: was thinking, my god, my work is mental health and

1280
00:54:58,719 --> 00:55:01,279
Speaker 2: even I didn't say you're okay, like and then I

1281
00:55:01,280 --> 00:55:02,839
Speaker 2: was thinking, oh, this is how hard it is. But

1282
00:55:03,239 --> 00:55:05,040
Speaker 2: this is this is the opposite of having a go

1283
00:55:05,080 --> 00:55:09,319
Speaker 2: at are you okay? It's wonderful. I think for a

1284
00:55:09,360 --> 00:55:11,560
Speaker 2: lot of us, the question is not are you okay?

1285
00:55:11,760 --> 00:55:14,640
Speaker 2: Like the concept you definitely ask people eventually, but the

1286
00:55:14,680 --> 00:55:17,680
Speaker 2: first question is not are you okay? It's like time

1287
00:55:17,719 --> 00:55:19,560
Speaker 2: over with Luke. It's the question is trying to go

1288
00:55:19,640 --> 00:55:21,480
Speaker 2: a beer? To like, not are you okay? Do you

1289
00:55:21,480 --> 00:55:24,000
Speaker 2: want to tell me? Something? Was because if I'm not

1290
00:55:24,040 --> 00:55:27,040
Speaker 2: okay and someone says you're okay, my response is I'm fine,

1291
00:55:27,239 --> 00:55:29,640
Speaker 2: and then I'll shut it down or I'll just feel

1292
00:55:29,840 --> 00:55:32,359
Speaker 2: like I've somehow made their day worse and I've let

1293
00:55:32,360 --> 00:55:35,040
Speaker 2: them down and I'm a drag on them. So time

1294
00:55:35,080 --> 00:55:36,880
Speaker 2: over the Luke, I would say trying to go a

1295
00:55:36,880 --> 00:55:39,080
Speaker 2: beer and he'd probably say yes, and then we'd have

1296
00:55:39,080 --> 00:55:41,520
Speaker 2: a beer, and then half an hour into talking shit,

1297
00:55:41,600 --> 00:55:44,440
Speaker 2: I'd say how things mate, what's going on, what's the

1298
00:55:44,600 --> 00:55:46,640
Speaker 2: how things at home? Or what's what's happening with work?

1299
00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:49,600
Speaker 2: Or that's when you start to get little snippets of

1300
00:55:49,719 --> 00:55:52,680
Speaker 2: things where people will let you in. So if you

1301
00:55:52,800 --> 00:55:55,040
Speaker 2: know someone who you are especially at a time like

1302
00:55:55,080 --> 00:55:58,480
Speaker 2: this COVID, if you know someone who you are not

1303
00:55:58,640 --> 00:56:00,640
Speaker 2: totally sure about they just seem to be a little

1304
00:56:00,640 --> 00:56:04,879
Speaker 2: bit more reclusive or potentially not engaging socially the way

1305
00:56:04,880 --> 00:56:07,719
Speaker 2: they usually do. Don't live with a regret that I

1306
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:11,600
Speaker 2: do that you didn't, and don't say euokay, because I

1307
00:56:11,640 --> 00:56:13,920
Speaker 2: just don't think the question works. It's what are you

1308
00:56:13,920 --> 00:56:16,920
Speaker 2: doing on Wednesday? Joining to have a coffee? Or if

1309
00:56:16,960 --> 00:56:18,759
Speaker 2: you love were exercise, do you want to go for

1310
00:56:18,719 --> 00:56:21,040
Speaker 2: a walk? Whatever it is, think what that person would

1311
00:56:21,120 --> 00:56:23,640
Speaker 2: like to do with you, suggest it, and then you

1312
00:56:23,800 --> 00:56:25,600
Speaker 2: just like chip away, like and don't do it in

1313
00:56:25,640 --> 00:56:26,920
Speaker 2: a way they're going to go. Are they trying to

1314
00:56:26,960 --> 00:56:29,040
Speaker 2: check if I'm okay? Just ask them what's good? Like

1315
00:56:29,120 --> 00:56:31,799
Speaker 2: people love telling their story if you think it's something

1316
00:56:31,840 --> 00:56:34,560
Speaker 2: about the kids or their partner, like how's your husband going,

1317
00:56:34,600 --> 00:56:36,239
Speaker 2: how's your wife going and let them talk and just

1318
00:56:36,239 --> 00:56:38,200
Speaker 2: listen to them. And the very act of sharing what

1319
00:56:38,200 --> 00:56:40,080
Speaker 2: you're going through is often all you need to do

1320
00:56:40,560 --> 00:56:42,520
Speaker 2: in order to unburden yourself with a shame you feel

1321
00:56:42,560 --> 00:56:44,880
Speaker 2: that situation. So that's my I know you said you

1322
00:56:44,920 --> 00:56:46,200
Speaker 2: didn't want a long answer, but I've given you a

1323
00:56:46,239 --> 00:56:46,799
Speaker 2: long answer, and.

1324
00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:48,080
Speaker 1: I know I love a long answer.

1325
00:56:48,400 --> 00:56:52,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's I don't know if you notice, is you

1326
00:56:52,360 --> 00:56:54,400
Speaker 2: and Abby have the exact same laugh. Do you know that?

1327
00:56:55,200 --> 00:56:59,759
Speaker 2: I know, Yeah, it's exactly the same. When I heard

1328
00:57:00,080 --> 00:57:01,839
Speaker 2: when she was on your podcast, I couldn't tell who

1329
00:57:01,920 --> 00:57:04,000
Speaker 2: was laughing her. I couldn't tell if she was laughing

1330
00:57:04,040 --> 00:57:06,120
Speaker 2: at her own jokes or you were laughing at her jokes.

1331
00:57:06,239 --> 00:57:07,000
Speaker 1: It was probably both.

1332
00:57:08,600 --> 00:57:10,480
Speaker 2: You had out a bit of wine, I think that's possible.

1333
00:57:10,160 --> 00:57:16,760
Speaker 1: But grape juice. Yeah, it's funny though. I think that's

1334
00:57:16,760 --> 00:57:19,200
Speaker 1: something really valuable. You said towards the end of the

1335
00:57:19,240 --> 00:57:22,280
Speaker 1: book was about vulnerability and that it doesn't come as

1336
00:57:22,280 --> 00:57:24,640
Speaker 1: easily to some people, and it does take chipping away.

1337
00:57:24,720 --> 00:57:26,680
Speaker 1: It's not like a are you okay, Oh, here's my

1338
00:57:26,720 --> 00:57:29,600
Speaker 1: life story now I feel better. Even the story you

1339
00:57:29,600 --> 00:57:33,160
Speaker 1: told about Nick Riewoldt, who I love Kath his wife

1340
00:57:33,200 --> 00:57:35,040
Speaker 1: was actually in rewinder with us on that trip.

1341
00:57:35,400 --> 00:57:35,720
Speaker 2: Wow.

1342
00:57:36,000 --> 00:57:39,439
Speaker 1: The fact that he was so resistant, because people often

1343
00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:42,360
Speaker 1: don't realize they have the moment of vulnerability, or they're

1344
00:57:42,400 --> 00:57:45,440
Speaker 1: not even willing to open up that door. Sometimes it

1345
00:57:45,480 --> 00:57:47,280
Speaker 1: does take a bit to even get them in a

1346
00:57:47,280 --> 00:57:49,760
Speaker 1: position where they're willing to be vulnerable with you to

1347
00:57:49,880 --> 00:57:52,840
Speaker 1: be helped. So I think that's a really important reminder

1348
00:57:52,880 --> 00:57:55,480
Speaker 1: that you don't just go straight into it, you know totally.

1349
00:57:55,560 --> 00:57:58,320
Speaker 2: That Nick Raewolt story is such a beauty. He's been

1350
00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:00,280
Speaker 2: one of my favorite players of all time, and I

1351
00:58:00,320 --> 00:58:02,240
Speaker 2: had such a big crush on him his entire career

1352
00:58:02,440 --> 00:58:05,160
Speaker 2: then and then, and I don't know him very well now.

1353
00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:07,000
Speaker 2: He's a lovely guy. We get on very well. But

1354
00:58:07,040 --> 00:58:09,440
Speaker 2: I remember when he first walked into the session. I

1355
00:58:09,440 --> 00:58:11,400
Speaker 2: was at sek Kilda Footy Club a bit nervous. I

1356
00:58:11,440 --> 00:58:12,840
Speaker 2: was like, where's Nick roy Welt And he walked in, went,

1357
00:58:12,840 --> 00:58:14,480
Speaker 2: oh my god, there's Nick ary Walt. And I was

1358
00:58:14,480 --> 00:58:16,960
Speaker 2: seeing next to the player welfare manager who organized the talk,

1359
00:58:16,960 --> 00:58:19,000
Speaker 2: and he came over. He said hi to me. I

1360
00:58:19,000 --> 00:58:20,320
Speaker 2: was like, oh my gosh, he's awesome. And then he

1361
00:58:20,320 --> 00:58:22,120
Speaker 2: said to the player welfare manager. I don't need to

1362
00:58:22,120 --> 00:58:22,960
Speaker 2: be here for this time.

1363
00:58:24,440 --> 00:58:25,960
Speaker 1: Never. Are you sure? I'm pretty sure I don't need

1364
00:58:25,960 --> 00:58:26,320
Speaker 1: to be here.

1365
00:58:26,600 --> 00:58:28,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, he goes, I don't know. I'll go and get

1366
00:58:28,800 --> 00:58:30,080
Speaker 2: a rub down or something. It's a better use of

1367
00:58:30,120 --> 00:58:35,080
Speaker 2: my time. And I was like, oh, forty years exactly

1368
00:58:35,080 --> 00:58:36,480
Speaker 2: now he was. He was wonderful and we get on

1369
00:58:36,560 --> 00:58:38,600
Speaker 2: very well now, Nick, and.

1370
00:58:37,280 --> 00:58:41,400
Speaker 1: I actually loved reading about how you foann girl. People

1371
00:58:41,400 --> 00:58:43,080
Speaker 1: like you're like, oh my god, all these famous people

1372
00:58:43,120 --> 00:58:44,760
Speaker 1: that I love that I've been following my whole life,

1373
00:58:44,760 --> 00:58:45,960
Speaker 1: and like you're trying to play cool.

1374
00:58:48,160 --> 00:58:49,080
Speaker 2: I'm not very good at it.

1375
00:58:49,960 --> 00:58:54,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm the worst. I'm so bad. So last section

1376
00:58:54,240 --> 00:58:57,040
Speaker 1: you'll play ta now. I think you would of all

1377
00:58:57,120 --> 00:58:59,480
Speaker 1: people agree that you know, in this whole world of

1378
00:58:59,520 --> 00:59:03,080
Speaker 1: productive achievement and progress, that it's so important just to

1379
00:59:03,120 --> 00:59:05,880
Speaker 1: play and just to have activities that make you forget

1380
00:59:05,880 --> 00:59:08,240
Speaker 1: what time it is and that don't necessarily have a goal.

1381
00:59:08,840 --> 00:59:11,280
Speaker 1: Like I think, I try and rest, but then I

1382
00:59:11,360 --> 00:59:13,600
Speaker 1: try and win it resting, and I try and like

1383
00:59:13,640 --> 00:59:17,160
Speaker 1: a type everything, or I'm like garden and then I'll

1384
00:59:17,200 --> 00:59:19,360
Speaker 1: try and like do a gardening course and become like

1385
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:21,920
Speaker 1: a gardening influencer. So I really need to just calm

1386
00:59:22,000 --> 00:59:25,240
Speaker 1: down and do things that I'm not trying to necessarily,

1387
00:59:25,320 --> 00:59:28,280
Speaker 1: like improve at or do well at. What other things

1388
00:59:28,280 --> 00:59:31,439
Speaker 1: that you do that make you just forget where you are?

1389
00:59:32,800 --> 00:59:35,720
Speaker 2: Well, it's funny. I wouldn't say they're not attached to

1390
00:59:35,720 --> 00:59:39,520
Speaker 2: a goal, but running is my absolute. Like I trained

1391
00:59:39,560 --> 00:59:40,600
Speaker 2: for four hundred meters.

1392
00:59:41,000 --> 00:59:42,880
Speaker 1: Oh this is your masters. You did the masters?

1393
00:59:43,200 --> 00:59:45,400
Speaker 2: Yes, we had the masters. Three weeks ago. We had

1394
00:59:45,400 --> 00:59:49,840
Speaker 2: the twenty twenty one Victorian Masters Championships, which is an

1395
00:59:49,880 --> 00:59:52,520
Speaker 2: activity I take way too seriously for four year old.

1396
00:59:52,520 --> 00:59:57,440
Speaker 2: But I'm training. When I was at school, I loved athletics,

1397
00:59:57,440 --> 00:59:59,439
Speaker 2: but then I chose cricket and played cricket tolass thirty

1398
00:59:59,440 --> 01:00:01,400
Speaker 2: five and then stopped playing crick and I was like,

1399
01:00:01,440 --> 01:00:03,160
Speaker 2: is it too late for athletics. Probably, but I'm going

1400
01:00:03,240 --> 01:00:06,160
Speaker 2: to give it a go. And I've ended up training

1401
01:00:06,200 --> 01:00:08,320
Speaker 2: with Katrina Bissett and the girls who are training for

1402
01:00:08,400 --> 01:00:11,680
Speaker 2: the Tokyo Olympics with Pet of Fortune, Kathy Freeman's coach.

1403
01:00:11,720 --> 01:00:13,360
Speaker 2: He's our coach. And how I've ended up in that

1404
01:00:13,400 --> 01:00:16,600
Speaker 2: group of girls, I'll never know. They all came and

1405
01:00:16,600 --> 01:00:18,680
Speaker 2: they all came and see me speak at the came

1406
01:00:18,720 --> 01:00:20,400
Speaker 2: and saw me speak at the convention center and our

1407
01:00:20,400 --> 01:00:23,080
Speaker 2: backstage having a drink afterwards, and Penny was meeting them

1408
01:00:23,080 --> 01:00:24,920
Speaker 2: all and stuff, and then one of them said, it

1409
01:00:24,960 --> 01:00:26,200
Speaker 2: is a bit weird that there's this four year old

1410
01:00:26,200 --> 01:00:27,400
Speaker 2: man who chases this around the track.

1411
01:00:27,440 --> 01:00:31,840
Speaker 1: That's in any other circumstance that would be really creepy.

1412
01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:34,520
Speaker 2: Totally still is a bit of it, but yeah, for me,

1413
01:00:34,640 --> 01:00:37,640
Speaker 2: it is the pursuit of trying to run four hundred

1414
01:00:37,640 --> 01:00:40,000
Speaker 2: meters as fast as possible. I know it's coll orientated,

1415
01:00:40,040 --> 01:00:42,880
Speaker 2: but and it is kind of quite a competitive thing.

1416
01:00:43,000 --> 01:00:45,680
Speaker 1: But like I'm like, what doesn't have a goal? What's

1417
01:00:45,720 --> 01:00:48,680
Speaker 1: not successful? Oh, I'm training with Kathy Freeman's coach, like

1418
01:00:48,880 --> 01:00:51,720
Speaker 1: just casually, It's fine.

1419
01:00:52,840 --> 01:00:54,600
Speaker 2: That's what I got me through. COVID was trying to

1420
01:00:54,680 --> 01:00:59,920
Speaker 2: like researching sprinting and like spikes and like different training approach,

1421
01:01:00,120 --> 01:01:02,200
Speaker 2: is a different gym and like trying. So that was

1422
01:01:02,240 --> 01:01:05,000
Speaker 2: a big one. But as far as play on the

1423
01:01:05,040 --> 01:01:09,000
Speaker 2: trampoline with my son, that is like that's a really

1424
01:01:09,000 --> 01:01:12,320
Speaker 2: special time. We we have this amazing trampline. He's obsessed

1425
01:01:12,320 --> 01:01:14,240
Speaker 2: with it. He's really good on it, and I love

1426
01:01:14,320 --> 01:01:17,800
Speaker 2: doing things that make him feel self esteem wise. He's,

1427
01:01:17,880 --> 01:01:19,440
Speaker 2: you know, you can get a bit anxious at times.

1428
01:01:19,440 --> 01:01:23,480
Speaker 2: But we invent the most outrageous games on the trampoline.

1429
01:01:23,520 --> 01:01:25,480
Speaker 2: Like there's one of the moment we have a fitball

1430
01:01:25,480 --> 01:01:26,640
Speaker 2: and we put in the middle and we just call

1431
01:01:26,680 --> 01:01:29,040
Speaker 2: it ballly and the amis is to not get touched

1432
01:01:29,040 --> 01:01:30,520
Speaker 2: by ball. And he goes watch you out for balling

1433
01:01:30,520 --> 01:01:32,120
Speaker 2: and wherever you jump, the ball goes to so you're

1434
01:01:32,120 --> 01:01:34,000
Speaker 2: trying and dodge bally. That's the game of paint at

1435
01:01:34,000 --> 01:01:35,840
Speaker 2: the moment. Then we put another one last night where

1436
01:01:36,120 --> 01:01:37,760
Speaker 2: you run to the fence, touch the fence, jump on

1437
01:01:37,760 --> 01:01:39,960
Speaker 2: the trampoline, run to the table, touch the table, then

1438
01:01:40,040 --> 01:01:42,240
Speaker 2: jump off a chair and then you just keep doing that.

1439
01:01:42,280 --> 01:01:44,600
Speaker 2: I said, what's this game call? And he said this

1440
01:01:44,680 --> 01:01:47,280
Speaker 2: is called run and touch the table and jump off

1441
01:01:47,280 --> 01:01:48,960
Speaker 2: the couch and then jump into the chair and then

1442
01:01:49,000 --> 01:01:50,760
Speaker 2: John trampline and then laugh and then line on the

1443
01:01:50,800 --> 01:01:52,680
Speaker 2: trampline with daddy. I was like, that's a good nae.

1444
01:01:53,200 --> 01:01:58,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, great patent, that really catchy.

1445
01:01:58,640 --> 01:02:01,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's it. So the first half an hour that

1446
01:02:01,680 --> 01:02:03,360
Speaker 2: my daughter Elsie is a wake for and everyone else

1447
01:02:03,400 --> 01:02:06,040
Speaker 2: is still asleep opening the door. It's awful at like

1448
01:02:06,200 --> 01:02:07,960
Speaker 2: five thirty in the morning when she gets up, but

1449
01:02:08,440 --> 01:02:10,480
Speaker 2: she's just standed the biggest smile on her face, and

1450
01:02:10,480 --> 01:02:12,160
Speaker 2: you open the door and she squeals like she just

1451
01:02:12,240 --> 01:02:14,760
Speaker 2: cannot believe you've opened the door. And you get her

1452
01:02:14,760 --> 01:02:16,400
Speaker 2: out of the cot and I just lie on the floor.

1453
01:02:16,480 --> 01:02:19,920
Speaker 2: So I'm still very tired, and just her crawling around you,

1454
01:02:20,000 --> 01:02:21,880
Speaker 2: lying on top of you, grabbing all her soft toys.

1455
01:02:21,880 --> 01:02:24,960
Speaker 2: She's such an affectionate person. We're very similar. We're both

1456
01:02:25,080 --> 01:02:27,400
Speaker 2: very very affectionate people. So we couple each other a lot.

1457
01:02:27,520 --> 01:02:28,520
Speaker 1: Stage five clingers.

1458
01:02:28,680 --> 01:02:30,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the oh, the two of us. Yeah, Penny

1459
01:02:30,440 --> 01:02:32,880
Speaker 2: is not the most affections ot of things. Same with Benji.

1460
01:02:33,120 --> 01:02:34,600
Speaker 2: So but Elsie and I just cuddle all the time.

1461
01:02:35,680 --> 01:02:40,240
Speaker 2: So that is it. Doing that is like a That's

1462
01:02:40,240 --> 01:02:42,960
Speaker 2: definitely a thing where I feel like there's no goals

1463
01:02:42,960 --> 01:02:45,000
Speaker 2: attached to it. There's no got to win at this,

1464
01:02:45,120 --> 01:02:46,440
Speaker 2: there's no like, got to be the best of this.

1465
01:02:46,520 --> 01:02:49,600
Speaker 2: It's just to very lose yourself in, like the love

1466
01:02:49,840 --> 01:02:54,120
Speaker 2: I have for my daughter, you know, she's just, oh

1467
01:02:54,160 --> 01:02:54,560
Speaker 2: my god.

1468
01:02:54,880 --> 01:02:57,040
Speaker 1: I love kids for that reason. I think that they

1469
01:02:57,080 --> 01:02:59,840
Speaker 1: live so in the moment and their needs are so immediate.

1470
01:02:59,880 --> 01:03:02,880
Speaker 1: And I've got a lot of friends who have young kids.

1471
01:03:02,880 --> 01:03:05,240
Speaker 1: If you if you pick up your phone, they know

1472
01:03:05,400 --> 01:03:08,400
Speaker 1: they're excuse me, hello, I want your attention.

1473
01:03:10,120 --> 01:03:13,000
Speaker 2: Whereas whereas as adults, if someone pick up the phone,

1474
01:03:13,080 --> 01:03:14,680
Speaker 2: we go, I'll do it as well, and then we

1475
01:03:14,720 --> 01:03:16,880
Speaker 2: just lose ourselves as well. Whereas kids it's.

1476
01:03:18,240 --> 01:03:22,400
Speaker 1: Yes, but I also love with the track and field

1477
01:03:22,520 --> 01:03:25,960
Speaker 1: that I think we do get this big barrier in

1478
01:03:26,000 --> 01:03:27,680
Speaker 1: our brains. At firstly, we don't want to be agin

1479
01:03:28,000 --> 01:03:31,160
Speaker 1: be a beginner at anything. We often think it's too

1480
01:03:31,240 --> 01:03:34,600
Speaker 1: late to start things, and we also think like if

1481
01:03:34,640 --> 01:03:36,800
Speaker 1: I can't go pro, then this is not worth doing.

1482
01:03:37,160 --> 01:03:39,880
Speaker 1: And I think by cutting out all of those activities,

1483
01:03:40,120 --> 01:03:43,920
Speaker 1: we miss out on playtime because like if you you know,

1484
01:03:44,000 --> 01:03:45,919
Speaker 1: play seems like a waste of time because it doesn't

1485
01:03:45,920 --> 01:03:48,920
Speaker 1: take all those boxes. But I think, why lose you're

1486
01:03:48,960 --> 01:03:52,360
Speaker 1: inner child, like we've played forever, and the more you

1487
01:03:52,440 --> 01:03:54,880
Speaker 1: stay in touch with like we take life so seriously,

1488
01:03:55,320 --> 01:03:57,640
Speaker 1: the more you have, you know, a couple of hours

1489
01:03:57,680 --> 01:03:59,800
Speaker 1: a week where you just throw your body around or

1490
01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:03,120
Speaker 1: do random stuff that is you know, not related to

1491
01:04:03,120 --> 01:04:05,360
Speaker 1: your vacation, the better you are as a human, Like

1492
01:04:05,400 --> 01:04:07,120
Speaker 1: I feel like it makes you bring so much better

1493
01:04:07,240 --> 01:04:08,320
Speaker 1: energy back to your work.

1494
01:04:08,520 --> 01:04:10,360
Speaker 2: It was that I couldn't agree more. It was the

1495
01:04:10,400 --> 01:04:13,800
Speaker 2: most wholesome so the Victorian Masters. It's like anyone over

1496
01:04:13,840 --> 01:04:15,800
Speaker 2: the age of thirty can be part of the Masters, right,

1497
01:04:16,000 --> 01:04:18,320
Speaker 2: and everything you just said. Then I was like, well,

1498
01:04:18,480 --> 01:04:19,960
Speaker 2: I haven't trained in ages. I'm not gonna be good

1499
01:04:19,960 --> 01:04:22,320
Speaker 2: when I start. I'm going to feel very, very out

1500
01:04:22,320 --> 01:04:25,120
Speaker 2: of place. Three years later, it's like one of my

1501
01:04:25,120 --> 01:04:26,760
Speaker 2: favorite things've ever done. But I was at the Master's

1502
01:04:26,840 --> 01:04:30,120
Speaker 2: Championships and I'm watching like eighty five year old men

1503
01:04:30,520 --> 01:04:33,560
Speaker 2: do javelin, And I'm telling you now, the guy I

1504
01:04:33,600 --> 01:04:36,120
Speaker 2: was watching, if he'd just dropped it, it would have gone

1505
01:04:36,200 --> 01:04:39,160
Speaker 2: further than he managed to throw it. Like if he'd

1506
01:04:39,160 --> 01:04:41,080
Speaker 2: accidentally dropped it while he was trying to throw it, it

1507
01:04:41,080 --> 01:04:43,280
Speaker 2: was like he went half a foot. But he's done

1508
01:04:43,320 --> 01:04:46,280
Speaker 2: his big run up all those stretches, and it's just

1509
01:04:46,320 --> 01:04:47,880
Speaker 2: like topped out of his hand and he's like looked

1510
01:04:47,880 --> 01:04:49,560
Speaker 2: at it and just sort of like hands on his hips,

1511
01:04:49,600 --> 01:04:52,000
Speaker 2: did this like very satisfied not and like his wife

1512
01:04:52,080 --> 01:04:55,200
Speaker 2: clapped him, And I was like this is this is great,

1513
01:04:55,280 --> 01:04:57,840
Speaker 2: like this is what it's played like. It reminded me

1514
01:04:57,840 --> 01:04:59,840
Speaker 2: of the primary school athletics where everyone has a go,

1515
01:05:00,080 --> 01:05:02,320
Speaker 2: like you all do it every house, you have to

1516
01:05:02,360 --> 01:05:04,800
Speaker 2: represent your house in a certain event. It had that

1517
01:05:04,840 --> 01:05:06,560
Speaker 2: filter it. I mean, yes, I was taking it way

1518
01:05:06,600 --> 01:05:09,440
Speaker 2: too seriously. And I saw my aunt nemesis. I was like,

1519
01:05:09,480 --> 01:05:11,560
Speaker 2: I must beat him, I must beat him. So happy,

1520
01:05:11,840 --> 01:05:14,520
Speaker 2: I was like, this is the most beautifully wholesome thing

1521
01:05:14,800 --> 01:05:17,240
Speaker 2: you could possibly do until I take it way too seriously.

1522
01:05:17,480 --> 01:05:19,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, until you come and ruin everyone's fun. But like

1523
01:05:20,640 --> 01:05:26,240
Speaker 1: being too intense. Just before COVID, we started doing gymnastics classes,

1524
01:05:26,280 --> 01:05:29,040
Speaker 1: but not like learning gymnastics for like tumbling, like just

1525
01:05:29,440 --> 01:05:31,320
Speaker 1: some assaulting into the pit and then trying to get

1526
01:05:31,360 --> 01:05:34,400
Speaker 1: out of the pit. And it was no joke. My

1527
01:05:34,560 --> 01:05:36,800
Speaker 1: favorite part of the week. Like I would hang out

1528
01:05:36,920 --> 01:05:39,600
Speaker 1: to Friday so we could tumble fun.

1529
01:05:39,960 --> 01:05:42,880
Speaker 2: I feel like saying unbridled joy, but I actually don't

1530
01:05:42,920 --> 01:05:44,600
Speaker 2: know what unbridled means. What is unbrilled?

1531
01:05:45,320 --> 01:05:46,680
Speaker 1: I feel like it's got to do with a horse.

1532
01:05:49,600 --> 01:05:53,480
Speaker 1: I'm actually trying to get an equestrian related person on

1533
01:05:53,560 --> 01:05:55,520
Speaker 1: the podcast so I can have an episode called Seize

1534
01:05:55,520 --> 01:06:01,560
Speaker 1: the NA want to do like it. So another thing

1535
01:06:01,760 --> 01:06:03,760
Speaker 1: I took Eat Prey Love really seriously. When I got

1536
01:06:03,760 --> 01:06:06,880
Speaker 1: into like play a Gay as a concept and went

1537
01:06:06,920 --> 01:06:09,640
Speaker 1: to like pottery, and you know, I've been doing all

1538
01:06:09,640 --> 01:06:13,560
Speaker 1: the random classes. We went back to do laser Fource

1539
01:06:13,760 --> 01:06:17,160
Speaker 1: like that game. It's been so much fun. But I

1540
01:06:17,160 --> 01:06:19,720
Speaker 1: want to do a pottery class called sees the Clay

1541
01:06:21,160 --> 01:06:23,240
Speaker 1: for Mardi Gras. Last year we did Seize the Gay.

1542
01:06:23,960 --> 01:06:24,640
Speaker 1: It's just great.

1543
01:06:25,160 --> 01:06:26,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's endless. It is endless.

1544
01:06:26,880 --> 01:06:32,600
Speaker 1: It's actually terrible to finish up. Last second, last question.

1545
01:06:32,960 --> 01:06:35,760
Speaker 1: Three interesting things about you that don't normally come up

1546
01:06:35,800 --> 01:06:41,400
Speaker 1: in conversation. Okay, like weird party tricks or snoring habits, or.

1547
01:06:41,720 --> 01:06:44,800
Speaker 2: Well, I'm a prolific sleepwalker, which is I mean, I

1548
01:06:44,800 --> 01:06:47,760
Speaker 2: think I've talked about a little bit prolific. The weirdest

1549
01:06:47,760 --> 01:06:51,640
Speaker 2: shit that is quite scary, Like I remember a year

1550
01:06:51,720 --> 01:06:54,360
Speaker 2: nine camp. We arrived at this it was Sea Kayk

1551
01:06:54,400 --> 01:06:56,840
Speaker 2: and we got there after dark and the can instructures.

1552
01:06:56,840 --> 01:06:58,520
Speaker 2: So it's actually too dangerous to go inwto the river

1553
01:06:58,560 --> 01:07:01,120
Speaker 2: to get water right now for a drink bottle. So sorry,

1554
01:07:01,160 --> 01:07:02,680
Speaker 2: there's no water. We'll get up in the morning early

1555
01:07:02,720 --> 01:07:05,440
Speaker 2: and go and get it. And my tent mate, Coli

1556
01:07:05,480 --> 01:07:07,600
Speaker 2: on our vest mates woke up at three in the

1557
01:07:07,640 --> 01:07:09,760
Speaker 2: morning and I was standing outside the tent with a

1558
01:07:09,760 --> 01:07:12,360
Speaker 2: full water bottle and I said, everyone's down the river

1559
01:07:12,440 --> 01:07:14,160
Speaker 2: and he goes, shit, really, you know yeah, and he goes,

1560
01:07:14,160 --> 01:07:15,800
Speaker 2: oh gosh. He gets his water bottle and gets out

1561
01:07:15,800 --> 01:07:17,600
Speaker 2: and he goes, no, they're not. Everyone's in their tent

1562
01:07:18,160 --> 01:07:19,440
Speaker 2: and he said, did you just go fill out your

1563
01:07:19,440 --> 01:07:21,680
Speaker 2: water bottle? And I went, I think I'd scratches all

1564
01:07:21,680 --> 01:07:23,760
Speaker 2: over my legs from like push bashing through the river.

1565
01:07:24,000 --> 01:07:25,840
Speaker 2: We got there the next day. It was so hard

1566
01:07:26,160 --> 01:07:27,840
Speaker 2: you have to have someone holding you into the river

1567
01:07:27,920 --> 01:07:29,240
Speaker 2: to like get the water out, and I went and

1568
01:07:29,280 --> 01:07:32,120
Speaker 2: get it by myself, like sleepwalking. So that's so I'm

1569
01:07:32,160 --> 01:07:33,120
Speaker 2: a prolific sleep walker.

1570
01:07:33,440 --> 01:07:34,800
Speaker 1: Do you remember it the next day?

1571
01:07:35,280 --> 01:07:36,520
Speaker 2: Not at all. I just had scratched on my legs

1572
01:07:36,560 --> 01:07:39,920
Speaker 2: in a full bottle of water, so, oh god.

1573
01:07:39,720 --> 01:07:42,880
Speaker 1: I sleep eat so I'll find like avocado skins what

1574
01:07:43,600 --> 01:07:46,040
Speaker 1: with a spoon like next to haven't and I won't

1575
01:07:46,080 --> 01:07:47,040
Speaker 1: remember it at all.

1576
01:07:47,080 --> 01:07:50,000
Speaker 2: That well, that's an amazing level of sleep walking.

1577
01:07:49,840 --> 01:07:51,680
Speaker 1: Like I will literally, so I don't. I'm not really

1578
01:07:51,680 --> 01:07:54,440
Speaker 1: a big sweet tooth. But in a hotel, like if

1579
01:07:54,480 --> 01:07:56,800
Speaker 1: there's chocolate, I'll wake up with the chocolate wrapper next

1580
01:07:56,800 --> 01:07:58,520
Speaker 1: to my head. Kidding, I don't even eat that. I

1581
01:07:58,560 --> 01:07:59,840
Speaker 1: don't even like that chocolate.

1582
01:08:00,040 --> 01:08:03,280
Speaker 2: It's amazing. There. That's a good one. This is just

1583
01:08:03,280 --> 01:08:04,960
Speaker 2: a really weird one. And people don't believe me when

1584
01:08:04,960 --> 01:08:07,320
Speaker 2: I told them this. So the classic primar school thing,

1585
01:08:07,360 --> 01:08:09,640
Speaker 2: I asked my mum. But I was allergic to water.

1586
01:08:12,200 --> 01:08:14,400
Speaker 2: I was like this boy in the bubble, like so

1587
01:08:14,440 --> 01:08:16,360
Speaker 2: sick all the time. And we do this allergy testing

1588
01:08:16,680 --> 01:08:19,040
Speaker 2: and I just eliminated all these foods one by one

1589
01:08:19,040 --> 01:08:21,920
Speaker 2: and by the end I was having like rice crackers

1590
01:08:22,320 --> 01:08:25,160
Speaker 2: and water and buckwheat pancakes. That's all I was eating

1591
01:08:25,160 --> 01:08:27,240
Speaker 2: for like three days. Took water out and I was

1592
01:08:27,280 --> 01:08:29,160
Speaker 2: and I drank milk and I was. I was fine.

1593
01:08:29,200 --> 01:08:32,000
Speaker 2: And so I was allergic to water. It wouldn't kill me,

1594
01:08:32,120 --> 01:08:34,679
Speaker 2: like it just I just get really sick and really

1595
01:08:34,760 --> 01:08:36,800
Speaker 2: run down and like just basically go to sleep when

1596
01:08:36,800 --> 01:08:39,000
Speaker 2: I had too much water. How weird is that? Again?

1597
01:08:39,560 --> 01:08:41,800
Speaker 2: So that's something I've never said out loud to an

1598
01:08:41,800 --> 01:08:42,400
Speaker 2: audience like.

1599
01:08:42,360 --> 01:08:44,440
Speaker 1: This, How do you stay hydrated?

1600
01:08:44,760 --> 01:08:46,560
Speaker 2: Well? I can drink water now just but if I

1601
01:08:46,640 --> 01:08:48,240
Speaker 2: drink heaps, I still start to feel a bit sick.

1602
01:08:48,280 --> 01:08:50,680
Speaker 2: So I get this like purified water, like I have

1603
01:08:50,760 --> 01:08:52,519
Speaker 2: this white don't now but I used to when I

1604
01:08:52,560 --> 01:08:54,040
Speaker 2: was going to have this like thing on the tap

1605
01:08:54,080 --> 01:08:56,639
Speaker 2: so of purify the water when it came through. So yeah,

1606
01:08:56,640 --> 01:08:57,400
Speaker 2: how weird is that?

1607
01:08:57,760 --> 01:09:00,280
Speaker 1: Oh my god? The diva is next level. You need

1608
01:09:00,280 --> 01:09:01,720
Speaker 1: a chair facing the right way, you need a three

1609
01:09:01,760 --> 01:09:03,960
Speaker 1: quarter light, and like a special chap that follows you

1610
01:09:03,960 --> 01:09:04,880
Speaker 1: around wherever you go.

1611
01:09:07,160 --> 01:09:09,200
Speaker 2: That's another one. I'm sure lancing well, half streelanking my

1612
01:09:09,280 --> 01:09:13,280
Speaker 2: dad's tree lanking, which which yeah, a lot of people stop. Yeah,

1613
01:09:13,280 --> 01:09:14,880
Speaker 2: I don't look at it's a bit weird, but yeah,

1614
01:09:14,880 --> 01:09:16,639
Speaker 2: there you go. I'm very proud half strae linking.

1615
01:09:16,720 --> 01:09:18,440
Speaker 1: Man, that's fascinating.

1616
01:09:18,880 --> 01:09:21,360
Speaker 2: Yeah. So that's it. That's one for you. What elseo

1617
01:09:21,360 --> 01:09:22,960
Speaker 2: I got for you? What else is? I had it?

1618
01:09:23,000 --> 01:09:24,639
Speaker 2: When I was in primary school. I had a stutter,

1619
01:09:25,000 --> 01:09:27,360
Speaker 2: which people find hard to blow because I'm a public speaker,

1620
01:09:27,439 --> 01:09:29,559
Speaker 2: but and from time to time it comes back in

1621
01:09:29,600 --> 01:09:32,439
Speaker 2: the worst possible moments. I did the Today Show, my

1622
01:09:32,479 --> 01:09:34,920
Speaker 2: first ever appearance on the Today Show. Like Georgia Gardener,

1623
01:09:34,920 --> 01:09:37,559
Speaker 2: asked me a question. I couldn't speak, and I was like,

1624
01:09:37,800 --> 01:09:39,599
Speaker 2: you've got to be kidding him. I stutter from when

1625
01:09:39,640 --> 01:09:40,720
Speaker 2: I was a kid has just come back.

1626
01:09:42,040 --> 01:09:44,320
Speaker 1: It's always in like the most inconvenient situation.

1627
01:09:44,960 --> 01:09:48,280
Speaker 2: Absolutely, absolutely, and I've sort of I'm okay with it now.

1628
01:09:48,560 --> 01:09:50,160
Speaker 2: But it was just I don't know what happened. I

1629
01:09:50,200 --> 01:09:52,479
Speaker 2: remember my brain going, God, imagine you've got to stutter now,

1630
01:09:52,520 --> 01:09:54,080
Speaker 2: and then sure enough it happened.

1631
01:09:54,120 --> 01:09:56,200
Speaker 1: Because you said that, I reckon, it's your brain like

1632
01:09:56,280 --> 01:09:57,280
Speaker 1: manifested it.

1633
01:09:58,080 --> 01:10:00,320
Speaker 2: Totally. Yeah. Anyway, there you go. There's there's a few

1634
01:10:00,320 --> 01:10:01,599
Speaker 2: things that I don't talk about too often.

1635
01:10:01,800 --> 01:10:06,640
Speaker 1: They're amazing. Thank you. And very last question, since I

1636
01:10:06,680 --> 01:10:09,760
Speaker 1: love quotes so much, what's your favorite quote? And you

1637
01:10:09,800 --> 01:10:11,599
Speaker 1: are not allowed to say the man in the Arena

1638
01:10:11,720 --> 01:10:15,439
Speaker 1: quote because A it's in your book. B it's like

1639
01:10:15,840 --> 01:10:19,640
Speaker 1: ten pages long. And see the last four people have

1640
01:10:19,760 --> 01:10:21,400
Speaker 1: had that as their favorite quote, So I'm going to

1641
01:10:21,400 --> 01:10:22,280
Speaker 1: make you pick another one.

1642
01:10:22,560 --> 01:10:25,040
Speaker 2: And I don't totally like, I do believe it. I

1643
01:10:25,080 --> 01:10:26,920
Speaker 2: totally believe it, but it doesn't work for me. I

1644
01:10:26,960 --> 01:10:29,400
Speaker 2: can't say, oh, I'm in the arena. You don't have

1645
01:10:29,400 --> 01:10:31,320
Speaker 2: a right to criticize me, I still get hurt by it,

1646
01:10:31,360 --> 01:10:33,719
Speaker 2: so it doesn't work for me. It's a beautiful quote,

1647
01:10:33,720 --> 01:10:37,040
Speaker 2: but yeah, so I thought long and hard about this.

1648
01:10:38,120 --> 01:10:40,880
Speaker 2: I when saw a movie Jojo Rabbit. I don't know

1649
01:10:40,880 --> 01:10:43,479
Speaker 2: if you saw Jojo Rabbit, and there was a quote

1650
01:10:43,479 --> 01:10:46,519
Speaker 2: at the end, and I was there with Penny I

1651
01:10:46,560 --> 01:10:48,160
Speaker 2: think it was, and as I was, I just got

1652
01:10:48,160 --> 01:10:50,599
Speaker 2: tears in my eyes the second I saw it. So

1653
01:10:50,920 --> 01:10:54,839
Speaker 2: the quote is, let everything happen to you, beauty and terror,

1654
01:10:55,560 --> 01:10:57,759
Speaker 2: just keep going. No feeling is final.

1655
01:10:58,479 --> 01:10:58,920
Speaker 1: I love.

1656
01:10:58,960 --> 01:11:00,920
Speaker 2: I do feel like on the top it's just a

1657
01:11:00,960 --> 01:11:04,360
Speaker 2: lovely reminder to us that we can get really stuck

1658
01:11:04,680 --> 01:11:08,800
Speaker 2: sometimes in negative emotion and self doubt and all the

1659
01:11:08,800 --> 01:11:10,960
Speaker 2: stuff we've talked about. But it is so important to

1660
01:11:11,000 --> 01:11:14,880
Speaker 2: him that no feeling is final. And but that's the

1661
01:11:14,920 --> 01:11:17,800
Speaker 2: same when you're in an extremely you know, feeling so

1662
01:11:17,840 --> 01:11:21,160
Speaker 2: happy and like it's not gonna last forever. It's just

1663
01:11:21,200 --> 01:11:24,719
Speaker 2: it's a moment, and yeah, keep going, no feeling is final.

1664
01:11:24,800 --> 01:11:26,759
Speaker 2: I think that's a lovely a lovely quote.

1665
01:11:26,960 --> 01:11:29,320
Speaker 1: What a beautiful way to end. Thank you so much here.

1666
01:11:29,400 --> 01:11:31,479
Speaker 1: This has been so delightful. I could talk to you

1667
01:11:31,520 --> 01:11:34,320
Speaker 1: for hours. But I feel like the puns will just

1668
01:11:34,320 --> 01:11:36,680
Speaker 1: be too forthcoming and you'll hate me. So I'm kind

1669
01:11:36,720 --> 01:11:37,840
Speaker 1: of cut myself.

1670
01:11:37,479 --> 01:11:40,000
Speaker 2: Off speaking to someone who it is how much I

1671
01:11:40,040 --> 01:11:41,840
Speaker 2: love puns. I was running with a girl the other

1672
01:11:41,920 --> 01:11:45,120
Speaker 2: day called Abby, not not Abbey Johnny, another girl, Abby Delamote.

1673
01:11:45,160 --> 01:11:48,240
Speaker 2: She's an amazing runner, and we were running together and

1674
01:11:48,240 --> 01:11:50,240
Speaker 2: we're running along the Yarra and I stood on a

1675
01:11:50,320 --> 01:11:51,840
Speaker 2: stick and it was just stuck on my shirt. I

1676
01:11:51,840 --> 01:11:53,639
Speaker 2: couldn't get off, and she goes, that's a bit sticky,

1677
01:11:54,320 --> 01:11:57,080
Speaker 2: and I couldn't, Like, I couldn't stop giggling for the

1678
01:11:57,120 --> 01:11:58,720
Speaker 2: rest of our run, on like half an hour and

1679
01:11:59,160 --> 01:12:01,800
Speaker 2: so fast we could talk for one time because I

1680
01:12:02,040 --> 01:12:02,679
Speaker 2: love a good punch.

1681
01:12:02,760 --> 01:12:05,560
Speaker 1: But thank you hours of fun hours.

1682
01:12:05,439 --> 01:12:08,120
Speaker 2: Exactly exactly, Sarah, thank you so much having me. I love,

1683
01:12:08,520 --> 01:12:11,000
Speaker 2: as I said, love the podcast, and love everything you're about.

1684
01:12:11,080 --> 01:12:13,479
Speaker 2: So it's a huge honor to be on your podcast.

1685
01:12:13,479 --> 01:12:14,839
Speaker 2: Thank you, Oh, thank.

1686
01:12:14,640 --> 01:12:17,960
Speaker 1: You so much. The honor is mine. I know. I

1687
01:12:18,080 --> 01:12:20,760
Speaker 1: use positive adjectives a lot on this show and have

1688
01:12:20,880 --> 01:12:23,880
Speaker 1: even had a not so constructive few reviews for being

1689
01:12:23,960 --> 01:12:26,559
Speaker 1: too bubbly, if there's even such a thing. But with

1690
01:12:26,640 --> 01:12:29,920
Speaker 1: guests like this, is there really any wonder. I hope

1691
01:12:29,960 --> 01:12:31,800
Speaker 1: some of you have caught the spark that I did

1692
01:12:31,800 --> 01:12:36,719
Speaker 1: from Hughes infectious passion, vulnerability and fabulous storytelling, and cannot

1693
01:12:36,760 --> 01:12:39,639
Speaker 1: recommend more highly that you follow this one up by

1694
01:12:39,640 --> 01:12:42,280
Speaker 1: reading his book, The Resilience Project. I'll link it in

1695
01:12:42,280 --> 01:12:46,000
Speaker 1: the show notes. As usual, I am always so proud

1696
01:12:46,040 --> 01:12:48,799
Speaker 1: when the neighborhood showers our guests with love for sharing

1697
01:12:48,880 --> 01:12:51,840
Speaker 1: so generously with us. So if you enjoyed or took

1698
01:12:51,880 --> 01:12:55,960
Speaker 1: something away, please share it tagging at Hugh van Kylenberg.

1699
01:12:56,000 --> 01:12:59,479
Speaker 1: Get the spelling from the episode title and us, of course,

1700
01:12:59,520 --> 01:13:02,640
Speaker 1: so we can reshare. Hope you are all having a

1701
01:13:02,760 --> 01:13:04,840
Speaker 1: wonderful week and are seizing your yea