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Speaker 1: You're listening to another mia podcast.

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Speaker 2: Mumma Mea acknowledges the traditional owners of the land. We

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Speaker 2: have recorded this podcast on the Gadigul people of the

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Speaker 2: Eor nation. We pay our respects to their elders past

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Speaker 2: and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and

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Speaker 2: torres Rate Islander cultures.

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Speaker 3: Hi, it's Anale's todd here from this Glorious Mess, introducing

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Speaker 3: hot Pod Summer, one hundred hours of curated listening across

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Speaker 3: the Mummamere network, just for you to escape the chaos

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Speaker 3: and enjoy with the kids at home and the weather

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Speaker 3: warming up. We've got episodes of Parents Anonymous to share.

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Speaker 3: Parents Anonymous is part game show, part church confessional. You

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Speaker 3: share your deepest parenting shame and myself and Stacey Hicks

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Speaker 3: rate you, but the worst parenting wins the most points,

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Speaker 3: so really you can't lose, and if you want more,

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Speaker 3: there's a link in the show.

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Speaker 1: Enjoy Parents Anonymous.

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Speaker 3: Welcome to this Glorious Mess. I'm Annalise. I'm a single

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Speaker 3: parent to two boys who are tween aged, so I

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Speaker 3: secretly sniff other people's babies heads when their parents aren't looking.

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Speaker 1: I love that from you and I'm Stacy Kicks. I'm

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Speaker 1: the deputy editor here at MMA MIA, and I'm running

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Speaker 1: on about four hour sleep because my toddler has decided

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Speaker 1: that three am is a great time to party, which

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Speaker 1: was a great time for me to party before I

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Speaker 1: had her, Now not so much.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I still party until three am sometimes, I'm single.

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Speaker 3: Parents so cool. Yeah, welcome, Welcome back to Parents Anonymous,

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Speaker 3: brought to you by this glorious mess.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and Parents Anonymous, as you'll know by now, is

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Speaker 1: part church confessional, part game show. So you tell us

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Speaker 1: a story completely anonymously, as the name suggests, and get

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Speaker 1: the guilt off your chest, and we give you made

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Speaker 1: up points based on our very serious, very scientific grading system.

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Speaker 1: And by very scientific and very serious, I mean vibes

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Speaker 1: and vibes alone.

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Speaker 3: It's a vibe check.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: We thought to get you in the mood for confessing

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Speaker 3: this week. We thought it's all very good and well

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Speaker 3: for us to sit up on our hell and rape

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Speaker 3: you and judge you from afar. But we actually haven't

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Speaker 3: spilt any of our own tea.

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Speaker 1: That's true. We haven't selfish. Yeah, we needed we need

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Speaker 1: to get down in the trenches. It's elitist I have

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Speaker 1: some really cooked ones, but I'm going to keep those

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Speaker 1: for another day. Well, I'm going to tell you some

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Speaker 1: of my little fun ones.

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Speaker 3: It'll dip your toe in.

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Speaker 1: I once spent one hundred and forty nine dollars on

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Speaker 1: a starting solids guide for my baby that I never

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Speaker 1: once used.

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Speaker 3: Is it plastic tubs? Is it a machine?

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Speaker 1: It was not even a real life book. It was

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Speaker 1: a e book, one hundred and forty nine dollars with

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Speaker 1: different recipes for mush, different ways to introduce allergens, different combinations.

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Speaker 3: I didn't use it once, like a bit of banana

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Speaker 3: in a bowl.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, all right, we're talking about wasting money. Yeah, so

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Speaker 3: do you still get the baby bonus when you have

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Speaker 3: a baby. This was like twelve years ago, so the

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Speaker 3: government gave and like I don't quote me, but it

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Speaker 3: might have been like four or five grand.

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Speaker 1: Wow. Yeah, I don't think you get that anymore.

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Speaker 3: Oh well, this was the good old, heady days of

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Speaker 3: the baby bonus. I think maybe k Ruj was in charge.

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Speaker 3: Thank you. I spent all of that on a very expensive,

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Speaker 3: obnoxious coffee table.

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Speaker 1: I love that you're about to be stuck at home

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Speaker 1: with a baby. You're going to be staring at that

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Speaker 1: coffee table.

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Speaker 3: You might as well like it aligned to proof. Yep,

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Speaker 3: And this show it just it doesn't exist without your

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Speaker 3: guilty confessions. So we want more of them. If you

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Speaker 3: want to be fully anonymous, you can just email us.

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Speaker 3: We'll never mention your name. Just have a look in

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Speaker 3: the show notes. All the confession options are there for you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. And on today's show, we have three new mystery

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Speaker 1: confessions that we haven't heard, and they are screens as

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Speaker 1: co parents. Anywhere is a toilet? Yes, and out of sight,

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Speaker 1: out of mind, great, I can't wait, great time, let's

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Speaker 1: get into that bait.

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Speaker 3: You got me? Yeah, And so for them, these ones

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Speaker 3: stays just so that we could secure the an I

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Speaker 3: can't say anonymmity, how do you say? Love it?

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Speaker 2: No?

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Speaker 3: That was perfect anonominimity.

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Speaker 1: Yep, we'll roll with that.

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Speaker 3: That word. We're going to be reading these out.

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Speaker 1: Yes, we're going to voice them for you.

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Speaker 3: It's like a sermon.

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Speaker 1: So, my four year old daughter watches about three hours

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Speaker 1: of TV a day, and I have no plans to

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Speaker 1: change this. The concept of limiting TV is not part

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Speaker 1: of my vocabulary. But maybe I'm the poster child for

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Speaker 1: bad parenting. My nine year old son watches TV and

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Speaker 1: plays video games for many hours a week. Adults say

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Speaker 1: bad words in front of him. He knows what beer is.

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Speaker 1: He doesn't drink it though, of course, and he doesn't

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Speaker 1: brush his teeth twice a day. Oh well, that wasn't

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Speaker 1: me saying, oh well, that was from the person who

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Speaker 1: submitted this one.

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Speaker 3: Okay, this there's a lot to unpack here. So the

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Speaker 3: first one was the four year old and the TV.

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Speaker 3: I mean, you know that there are guidelines from the government,

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Speaker 3: a strangy government about how much screen time I think

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Speaker 3: under five at zero hours now, I would say that

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Speaker 3: there would be zero point zero zero zero zero one

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Speaker 3: percent of the population that abides by that.

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Speaker 1: I agree with that. Yeah, absolutely, And look it does

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Speaker 1: when you are in the trenches, especially when they're around

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Speaker 1: this age, you need TV to help you. But you

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Speaker 1: do feel horrible when you're doing it, Like every time

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Speaker 1: you switch it on because you need a break or

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Speaker 1: they demand to watch another episode of Bluey. You do

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Speaker 1: feel bad putting them in front of a screen and thinking,

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Speaker 1: am I damaging their little mind? Is this appropriate content?

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Speaker 1: Maybe for the first child? The time when I second

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Speaker 1: came out it was the pepper pig era and he,

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Speaker 1: I swear to God, had a British accent. My daughter

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Speaker 1: has a little bit of a British accent. She does

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Speaker 1: ee Mummy, which is very cute. But we put on

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Speaker 1: bluey to you know, even out the accent, so that's

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Speaker 1: all fine.

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Speaker 3: The second thing there was the nine year old son YEP,

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Speaker 3: and video games and TV. Again I think for that

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Speaker 3: age bracket, I think it's about two hours a week.

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Speaker 1: But please, maybe there's also a guide on how much

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Speaker 1: chocolate I'm meant to eat a week, and I'm ignoring

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Speaker 1: that totally. So I'm actually with you on this.

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Speaker 3: Do you know on that I do have a parenting

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Speaker 3: strategy here. When my kids first went and discovered Fortnite,

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Speaker 3: I thought, oh, life is over. I think it was

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Speaker 3: school holidays. It just didn't coincide with a good time.

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Speaker 3: There was no limits. But you know what, they eventually

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Speaker 3: got sick of it. It was that binge until you

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Speaker 3: cannot consume no more. So maybe that this child is

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Speaker 3: on the path to that.

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Speaker 1: I do actually think sometimes that works. If you've got

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Speaker 1: an unlimited supply of something, you're not that interested in

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Speaker 1: it anymore because it's just there whenever you want it.

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Speaker 1: You're letting them make the decision. It's intuitive for them.

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Speaker 3: It's intuitive streaming, screen parenting. Yep.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so I actually think that's really great in that aspect.

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Speaker 1: So good on you.

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Speaker 3: Now the teeth, Oh look, I mean it is tricky

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Speaker 3: to get boys to brush their teeth. Yes, this is

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Speaker 3: the one thing that I would probably push for as

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Speaker 3: a parent with a child that has had a few feelings.

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Speaker 1: Oh, it's a long term investment, isn't it. I hadn't

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Speaker 1: even thought of it.

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Speaker 3: You do the teeth brushing, I would say more just

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Speaker 3: for the saving of the ball ache of going to

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Speaker 3: the dentist and getting a filling. I would recommend pushing

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Speaker 3: a little harder on that particular one.

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Speaker 1: I think ones they've got their adult teeth, you know

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Speaker 1: what their baby teeth are gonna come out anyway.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but nine you do have them, so you do? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 3: the grown up teeth.

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Speaker 1: Can you tell I've only got a three year old? Yes,

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Speaker 1: I've got that.

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Speaker 3: Stay at least I'm here for you to show you

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Speaker 3: the air of your future.

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Speaker 1: Way, So what are we rating this one?

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Speaker 3: I think that this one, I just feel like she's

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Speaker 3: doing a great job. Yeah, there's a little room for improvement,

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Speaker 3: but you know, we can all improve. No one's nailing

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Speaker 3: every area of life parenting. No, I'm going to give

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Speaker 3: her eight fillings out of ten.

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Speaker 1: You know what I love about this and what the

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Speaker 1: absence of in this is there's no guilt. Yes, she's

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Speaker 1: not feeling bad. She's actually proud of herself for this,

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Speaker 1: and I love that. So for that, I'm going to

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Speaker 1: give her a few extra points and she can have

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Speaker 1: eight and a half screens out of ten.

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Speaker 3: All right, moving on, anywhere is a toilet. I'm going

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Speaker 3: to read out this confession to protect the annominymity?

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Speaker 1: Are we going to change the name parents and an

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Speaker 1: anonymity in this?

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Speaker 3: Might learn how to say that work for next time.

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Speaker 3: I had a very colicky, unsettled baby, and when she

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Speaker 3: was about five months old, I had to drive with

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Speaker 3: her alone in the car for about an hour to

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Speaker 3: a specialist. I was terrified the whole time and so

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Speaker 3: frazzled getting everything organized that I forgot to pee. So

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Speaker 3: by the time I pulled up at the address, I

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Speaker 3: was busting, and that pelvic floor was not in top

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Speaker 3: shape anymore. I hadn't been able to stop on the

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Speaker 3: wave because, as anyone knows, if you stop even for

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Speaker 3: a second of the baby, they'll scream and you'll cry,

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Speaker 3: and it'll just be a total mess. So when I

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Speaker 3: pulled up, it was in a residential street. There were

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Speaker 3: no toilets around, and by that point the dam was

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Speaker 3: about to burn. I didn't know if the specialists had

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Speaker 3: a waiting room toilet or even where the entrance was,

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Speaker 3: so in a moment of desperation, I had to pull

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Speaker 3: out two of my daughter's nappies and just release right

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Speaker 3: there in the car. My poor baby had to stay

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Speaker 3: in the same nappy for four hours because I then

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Speaker 3: had to ration her for the rest of the day.

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Speaker 3: So let's unpack from the top. I want to hear

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Speaker 3: what you think of this first. A one hour drive

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Speaker 3: with a five month off is a ball ake, was brave.

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Speaker 3: There's points for bravery just in that mission alone. Your

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Speaker 3: pelvic floor will never be in good shape again.

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Speaker 1: Let's just sw You and I both know this well.

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Speaker 3: I am what last baby nine years postpartum LBL. It's

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Speaker 3: a lifelong condition.

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Speaker 1: It is. You and I cross our legs every time

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Speaker 1: we laugh at one another. We're doing it we're doing

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Speaker 1: it right now, just in case.

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Speaker 3: I'm actually I'm surprised that producer Grace doesn't put plastic

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Speaker 3: on our chairs. I called this, it's that dire, this

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Speaker 3: grab for nappies. It's a macguiva move.

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Speaker 1: It is it is.

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Speaker 3: It is quick thinking, it's protecting the car seats. And

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Speaker 3: I think if there had to be a choice between

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Speaker 3: mum being wet or a baby living in a wet

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Speaker 3: nappy for four hours, I definitely choose the baby.

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Speaker 1: An Alice, I'm going to say something, and I'm glad

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Speaker 1: you think all of these things because, in the spirit

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Speaker 1: of confessions, that is actually me. That was me you

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Speaker 1: I had to go in a nappy. I told you

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Speaker 1: I have a week pelvic floor.

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Speaker 3: You wat in the car into two nappy Look, because.

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Speaker 1: If I had questions much, ok, you can ask me

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Speaker 1: the answers. You can ask me while I was busting. Look,

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Speaker 1: it was desperate times. It was a bear grills macguy

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Speaker 1: iv a move.

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Speaker 3: That's what I said, mcgui.

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Speaker 1: I had no option. I had to go. It was

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Speaker 1: either there or in my tights on the side of

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Speaker 1: the street.

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Speaker 3: My first question is why did you two nappies? Because

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Speaker 3: because I.

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Speaker 1: Didn't know how much liquid they feel very heavy after

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Speaker 1: a full night and your baby in them, but I didn't.

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Speaker 1: I needed to have a second layer of protection in cave.

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Speaker 3: And then my other question is did anyone walk past? No?

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Speaker 1: Thank goodness, but it was. There was little old men

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Speaker 1: that walked past. Right before I got to this point.

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Speaker 1: As I was, I had a bit of a Sophie's

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Speaker 1: choice moment where I just didn't know what to do.

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Speaker 1: Like I was like, do I get the baby out?

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Speaker 1: Do I do this? I don't know what to do.

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Speaker 1: I was panicking, and so I went with this option. Oh,

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Speaker 1: I actually can't believe I've admitted this on a public podcast,

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Speaker 1: but here we are either I am thrilled. Well, look,

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Speaker 1: so what are you rating me? I'm raiding myself a

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Speaker 1: ten out of ten.

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Speaker 3: Obviously for the mcguiver like quick thinking that just alone

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Speaker 3: is impressive for sparing your car and your clothes, but

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Speaker 3: for the bravery of publicly share this, attaching a name

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Speaker 3: and a face and knowing how you know you actually

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Speaker 3: do get embarrassed in life. I do. For me to

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Speaker 3: admit this, it wouldn't be as brave, But for you,

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Speaker 3: I'm going eleven. Nappies out of all. Oh, thanks my

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Speaker 3: highest score.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, thank you, thank you. I think I deserve it.

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Speaker 1: It's a good sight.

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Speaker 3: Out of mind. Do the reading.

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Speaker 1: Here we go, Stacy. My fourth baby was a few

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Speaker 1: months old and still breastfeeding through the night. My husband

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Speaker 1: was into state for work when the four kids and

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Speaker 1: I all got a stomach bug. I had two year

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Speaker 1: old twins in nappies and the diarrhea was so runny

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Speaker 1: that no nappy could contain it. There was literal boo

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Speaker 1: buddles around the house, but I was so sick that

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Speaker 1: I just had to put a towel down on top

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Speaker 1: of the puddles and leave them for later. It was

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Speaker 1: absolutely foul. I'm convinced there is no possible sickness scenario

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Speaker 1: worse than this.

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Speaker 3: Two year old.

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Speaker 1: Twins and snappies and a stomach bug for all five

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Speaker 1: of them.

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Speaker 3: And your solo parenting.

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Speaker 1: Ah, look, you deserve a gold medal just for the

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Speaker 1: parenting of four well children. In my eyes, yes, on a.

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Speaker 3: Regular day without a Poonami, crist exactly.

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Speaker 1: That is an incredible feat. Minus the pooh puddles. Just

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Speaker 1: how you get through every day. This is awful. This

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Speaker 1: is one of those scenarios where you go. This has

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Speaker 1: to be a joke, like, this isn't my actual life.

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Speaker 3: And you know what the hardest thing is, there's no

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Speaker 3: one you can call it. No, you cannot invite another

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Speaker 3: human into that environment. No, there's pooh on the floor,

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Speaker 3: there's towels. I hope there wasn't dogs, because that just

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Speaker 3: would have added the dogs had been eating the pooh. Like,

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Speaker 3: I'm just hoping there wasn't a dog in that scenario.

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Speaker 1: This is pretty much as bad as it gets. But

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Speaker 1: I think you did exactly what you needed to do

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Speaker 1: in that moment and just get through it. Stick a

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Speaker 1: towel on top of it. Deal with it later, you

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Speaker 1: know how, Like you close the laundry door. Yeah, as

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Speaker 1: far as you're concerned, it's cleaning there, and you deal

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Speaker 1: with it later.

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Speaker 3: I'm hoping the towels wire put in the bin, not washed. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: just a small look.

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Speaker 1: But I hope you had a few good budget towels

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Speaker 1: on hand that you were ready to.

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Speaker 3: I don't want to put those in the washing machine.

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Speaker 3: That's just straight in the bin. Scoop it up in

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Speaker 3: the bin, Glen twenty, move on. Yeah, this is a

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Speaker 3: hurt locker. Yeah kind of scenario. This is a this

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Speaker 3: is war.

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Speaker 1: I think it's fabulous that you shared this, and so

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Speaker 1: I'm giving you nine and a half pooh puddles out

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Speaker 1: of ten. That's pretty bad.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to give you nine pounamis. Yeah, yeah, a

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Speaker 3: lot of strong finish. I still think that anywhere is

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Speaker 3: a toilet, which was the theme of your overshare which

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Speaker 3: I read out, which I will never forget as long

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Speaker 3: as I live. I think that you are the winner

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Speaker 3: of today. I can't wait to tell everyone about this

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Speaker 3: at work and for everyone to hear it.

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Speaker 1: So if you've got a confession, we'd love to hear it.

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Speaker 1: Please send us your secret chains. All the details are

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Speaker 1: in the show notes, and I promise you they are

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Speaker 1: so anonymous that producer Grace didn't even know that that

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Speaker 1: one was mine, so really didn't know.

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Speaker 3: No one knew.

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Speaker 1: You are completely anonymous. It doesn't even show up your

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Speaker 1: emails and not send them on through.

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Speaker 3: A nonminimity guarantee guarantee Indeed, we'll see you next scene,

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Speaker 3: next time. If you're looking for something else to listen to,

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Speaker 3: Mama Miya is officially presenting one hundred hours of summer

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Speaker 3: listens from Meaningful conversations to incredible stories, fashion, beauty, and more.

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Speaker 3: There's a link in the show notes