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<v Speaker 1>You're listening to Amma mea podcast Muma Mer acknowledges the

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<v Speaker 1>traditional owners of the land and waters. This podcast is

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<v Speaker 1>recorded on We spend a lot of time talking and

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<v Speaker 1>thinking about romantic relationships, searching for and finding that one

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<v Speaker 1>person who'll enrich your life, who'll choose you and only

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<v Speaker 1>you even change your last name. But what about friendships,

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<v Speaker 1>Those deep, unbreakable bonds, the ones who make your life

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<v Speaker 1>better without the strings attached, Those soulmate level best friends.

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<v Speaker 1>They're the person you call with good news, the one

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<v Speaker 1>you laugh and cry with, the one you run to

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<v Speaker 1>when your heart is broken. They know your secrets, your history,

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<v Speaker 1>your dreams, every side and every version of you. You

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<v Speaker 1>just couldn't imagine life without them. But you don't have to,

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<v Speaker 1>because you know through all of life's ups and downs,

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<v Speaker 1>the good times and the bad, They'll always be there,

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<v Speaker 1>won't they. I'm Georgia Love and this is everyone has

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<v Speaker 1>an ex best Friend. Come with me as we dive

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<v Speaker 1>into a collection of stories about friendships past through the

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<v Speaker 1>eyes and the hearts of the very people who lived them.

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<v Speaker 1>I want to take you back to two thousand and five.

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<v Speaker 1>Pop culture was defined by the iconic motorol eraser, you

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<v Speaker 1>downloaded music on LimeWire, carefully and savagely, curated your top

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<v Speaker 1>eight friends on MySpace, and blasted fall our boy through

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<v Speaker 1>your iPod shuffle. And for Sarah, it was also the

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<v Speaker 1>year she met Laura.

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<v Speaker 2>I was in year eight when I met Laura. They

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<v Speaker 2>were part of the cool group of girls and I

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<v Speaker 2>was more of the nerdy group of girls. We eventually

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<v Speaker 2>made friends over time, being in class together, and back

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<v Speaker 2>at that stage, MSN was massive on the chat system,

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<v Speaker 2>so we became closer and closer over that time. We'd

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<v Speaker 2>spent all night on the cordless landline talking to each

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<v Speaker 2>other till about midnight. We both didn't love going to school,

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<v Speaker 2>so we would definitely have a lot of sick days

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<v Speaker 2>and we'd spend the day on the phone all day

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<v Speaker 2>together talking. At school, we were always together on weekends.

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<v Speaker 2>We always had constant sleepovers, and everyone kind of knew

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<v Speaker 2>us as the two girls who would go to the

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<v Speaker 2>open party houses would sometimes be kissing the boys and

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<v Speaker 2>just enjoying being that fourteen fifteen year old age bracket.

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<v Speaker 2>I guess the things that made us so attached was

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<v Speaker 2>we were both a bit boy obsessed at that age,

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<v Speaker 2>we loved makeup, so we were always talking about makeup, hair,

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<v Speaker 2>and also just general life stuff that we'd bond about

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<v Speaker 2>about school, going shopping.

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<v Speaker 3>We'd go do weekends in the city.

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<v Speaker 2>We'd catch the train in and it was just over time,

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<v Speaker 2>the friendship grew and you became each other's safe person.

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<v Speaker 1>But once high school ended and they were no longer

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<v Speaker 1>seeing each other all day every day, that began to change.

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<v Speaker 2>So when we were about sixteen seventeen, we slowly grew

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<v Speaker 2>apart from each other. Both of us had left school

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<v Speaker 2>to pursue working full time. We had met and made

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<v Speaker 2>new friends being at work, so we weren't together twenty

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<v Speaker 2>four to seven, and we would still see each other

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<v Speaker 2>on weekends, but then slowly it started to drift apart.

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<v Speaker 3>I think just we had a.

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<v Speaker 2>Whole new life to explore outside of school and we

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<v Speaker 2>didn't really need each other to be each other's survival guide.

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<v Speaker 2>At school, we were still friends, but it probably honestly

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<v Speaker 2>went a couple of years where we hadn't spoken to

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<v Speaker 2>each other at all.

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<v Speaker 1>But the friendship gods had other ideas, and fate eventually intervened.

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<v Speaker 2>I was working one night at the local shopping center

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<v Speaker 2>and they came in and we started chatting, and they

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<v Speaker 2>were looking for a new job, and I said, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>there's actually a job going at my work. How about

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<v Speaker 2>you give me your resume and we'll get you in

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<v Speaker 2>for an interview. They got the job, and it was

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<v Speaker 2>like literally the last couple of years hadn't happened. I

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<v Speaker 2>went back to her family house, I saw her family,

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<v Speaker 2>she saw mine again, and we didn't really ever speak

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<v Speaker 2>about that period where we both fell out and didn't

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<v Speaker 2>really talk to each other. It was like swept under

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<v Speaker 2>the rug and we just continued out normal daily life.

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<v Speaker 2>I think as you get older, you meet people in

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<v Speaker 2>your life, and if they come back into your life,

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<v Speaker 2>I think they're meant to be there for some reason.

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<v Speaker 2>And I felt like she was everything to me. I

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<v Speaker 2>was single at the time, so we just spent all

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<v Speaker 2>our time together and she knew all my deepest, darkest secrets.

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<v Speaker 3>I knew all hers. And I think as you.

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<v Speaker 2>Get older, friendships develop and they get deeper and deeper.

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<v Speaker 2>They're not like the friendships she had going through primary

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<v Speaker 2>school and high school. We were close again. She was

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<v Speaker 2>my best friend, with text all day. It would spend

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<v Speaker 2>weekends together. If we both weren't working and we would

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<v Speaker 2>take our lunch breaks together, she would always listen to me.

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<v Speaker 2>She always stood up for me, so I think I

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<v Speaker 2>always knew she had my back, and she had a

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<v Speaker 2>really good family dynamic that I probably didn't have as

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<v Speaker 2>much at home. So I really enjoyed going to their house,

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<v Speaker 2>having dinner, having sleepover still even when we were older,

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<v Speaker 2>and just being there for each other. It just made

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<v Speaker 2>me feel special, like it made me feel like we

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<v Speaker 2>could do anything together, like we were just so close

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<v Speaker 2>that I could tell her anything, and that's what I

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<v Speaker 2>felt like, I could call her up if there was

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<v Speaker 2>anything to go wrong. I'm not the closest to my mum,

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<v Speaker 2>so I think it really helped having her as nearly

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<v Speaker 2>a maternal figure in my life, even though we were

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<v Speaker 2>the same age. I just felt like she could give

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<v Speaker 2>me any advice I ever needed and would be the

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<v Speaker 2>person I would turn to to ask any sort of

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<v Speaker 2>important question. I could have called her any time, any night,

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<v Speaker 2>and she would have answered the phone to me. She'd

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<v Speaker 2>never wanted anyone else to get super close to me,

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<v Speaker 2>so she was always could come off a bit cold

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<v Speaker 2>and people to think she'd be a bit rude where

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<v Speaker 2>with me, I never received that at my end, but

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<v Speaker 2>I could see it coming through to other people. She

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<v Speaker 2>would only open up to me, like when we are

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<v Speaker 2>really close. It was only really me involved in her friendship.

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<v Speaker 2>There was a few other friends in the background, but

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<v Speaker 2>really I was her number one person.

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<v Speaker 1>But there soon came a time when Laura did meet

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<v Speaker 1>another number one person, a guy named Ben. But having

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<v Speaker 1>a boyfriend didn't change Sarah's position as Laura's closest person.

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<v Speaker 1>It just meant that top spot would now be shared,

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<v Speaker 1>and Sarah didn't mind one bit.

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<v Speaker 2>He seemed great. He seemed very caring. It poppy took

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<v Speaker 2>about three months into her coming back into my life

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<v Speaker 2>and us working together to meet him. I'd gone over

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<v Speaker 2>to their house and they just moved into a new place,

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<v Speaker 2>and they seemed really happy. He seemed like you'd do

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<v Speaker 2>anything for her, and she was one of, as I said,

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<v Speaker 2>a bit cold that it took a while for if

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<v Speaker 2>she was dating someone to get to that close aspect,

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<v Speaker 2>so I knew it was serious.

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<v Speaker 3>When they moved in.

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<v Speaker 2>Together, I was really happy for them. I didn't see

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<v Speaker 2>her as much on the weekends as we used to do. Obviously,

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<v Speaker 2>people getting in relationships, their priorities change, but she was

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<v Speaker 2>still always texting me, but she was hanging out more

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<v Speaker 2>with him on the weekends and than seeing me and

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<v Speaker 2>going out and partying. I think every gets a little

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<v Speaker 2>bit envious of their best friend finding a decent partner

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<v Speaker 2>and then being so happy, and you kind of being

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<v Speaker 2>the one in the background who's single, who's like the

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<v Speaker 2>third wheel, watching them big que and you're just sitting

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<v Speaker 2>there by yourself. I think I'd been single for about

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<v Speaker 2>six to twelve months by that stage, and I asked her, like,

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<v Speaker 2>does he have any cute friends you can introduce me to?

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<v Speaker 2>And she said, look, we're going to have like a

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<v Speaker 2>housewarming thing. I want you to come. There's some friends

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<v Speaker 2>coming who are single, but there's one in particular who

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<v Speaker 2>I think you would get along with really well. His

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<v Speaker 2>name was Sam. So we met on a night before

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<v Speaker 2>we went out. We had a housewarming at their house

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<v Speaker 2>and I was getting dressed with the girls in the

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<v Speaker 2>room and we were all giggling and I'd put on

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<v Speaker 2>a dress and I was like, oh, I can't get this.

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<v Speaker 2>After the girls were like, go ask Sam to do

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<v Speaker 2>your dress up. So I went out there and he

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<v Speaker 2>made a crack, like on none of the girls could

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<v Speaker 2>help you, could they? And from that night on we

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<v Speaker 2>were basically it was on. Like we went out together

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<v Speaker 2>that night, we had a cheeky kiss on the dance floor,

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<v Speaker 2>and I was just really happy. I couldn't leave this nice,

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<v Speaker 2>normal guy was into me.

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<v Speaker 1>By the time they were twenty two, Sarah and Laura

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<v Speaker 1>had reached peak friendship goals. They were best friends, dating

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<v Speaker 1>best friends, spending weekends together, celebrating milestones, and building lives

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<v Speaker 1>that seemed to just fit together perfectly. It felt like

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<v Speaker 1>the best of both worlds, and they couldn't have and

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<v Speaker 1>didn't want to imagine life any differently. Then came two

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<v Speaker 1>of life's bigots milestones. Laura and Ben got engaged, and

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<v Speaker 1>shortly after found out they were expecting a bub I was.

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<v Speaker 2>Just so happy for them because we were quite young.

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<v Speaker 2>We were about twenty three at that age, so it

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<v Speaker 2>was so exciting that they were having a baby, and

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<v Speaker 2>it just made me really appreciate that I could be

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<v Speaker 2>there for them why they're going through this also hard

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<v Speaker 2>but exciting time. I thought it would definitely change as

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<v Speaker 2>in even more closer because I'd be there to help

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<v Speaker 2>her with the babies and be there to help her

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<v Speaker 2>through pregnancy, like take care of her. Obviously we were

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<v Speaker 2>working together. I could help her in that way. If

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<v Speaker 2>she was feeling sick or anything, I could be there

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<v Speaker 2>to help her. But I remember just being so excited

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<v Speaker 2>at that point. My relation at the time was still

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<v Speaker 2>going really well. We were happy, we were happy for them,

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<v Speaker 2>and again I thought this was the endgame. I was like, perfect,

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<v Speaker 2>I can see how this plays out for them, and

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<v Speaker 2>then see how it will play out for us. Laura

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<v Speaker 2>really wanted me to get pregnant too, and I just

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<v Speaker 2>wasn't ready at that stage.

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<v Speaker 3>But she's like, if you get pregnant, we have babies together.

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<v Speaker 3>And Sam and I.

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<v Speaker 2>Sam definitely didn't want kids at that stage, and I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, I'm not going to trap him to get pregnant,

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<v Speaker 2>but it would have been nice to have kids close together.

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<v Speaker 2>But it was really good. Sam and I would go

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<v Speaker 2>shopping on the weekends to get the baby clothes, and

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<v Speaker 2>it just strengthened us all being together because we'd be

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<v Speaker 2>happy to come around and just hang out and just

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<v Speaker 2>chill with them. When the baby was born, I was

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<v Speaker 2>really there for Laura like I would have Mondays off,

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<v Speaker 2>So every Monday I'd go around and spend my day

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<v Speaker 2>with her at home. I'd bring McDonald's or bring some

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<v Speaker 2>type of food, helpful of the washing, hold the baby

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<v Speaker 2>so she could shower. So every Monday I was basically

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<v Speaker 2>at her house, stepping up and helping her out. Because

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<v Speaker 2>I think being a young mum you can also feel

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<v Speaker 2>a bit distance from everyone else. So I just wanted

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<v Speaker 2>to be there to support her, to show times won't

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<v Speaker 2>change because.

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<v Speaker 3>You've had a baby. I'll still be here for you.

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<v Speaker 2>We were probably closer as in an emotional level because

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<v Speaker 2>she was a new mom. I was there helping her,

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<v Speaker 2>helping the baby all the time, and I felt like, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>it was an emotional level. And then she'd asked Sam

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<v Speaker 2>and I to be godparents and we were blown away.

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<v Speaker 2>We aren't cofflick at all that they were and we

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<v Speaker 2>were more than happy to step up for that challenge

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<v Speaker 2>and that big role. At this stage, Laura had had

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<v Speaker 2>a second baby. The babies were born very close together,

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<v Speaker 2>and we just felt so special. I still remember that

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<v Speaker 2>day and have the photos and look back on it

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<v Speaker 2>of all of us standing up at the church together

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<v Speaker 2>and having the babies in our arms, and it just

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<v Speaker 2>felt like these people trust me with their children if

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<v Speaker 2>anything was to happen to them, and they also trust

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<v Speaker 2>me in a way that they think I can guide

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<v Speaker 2>their children in life if they have any questions. Sam

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<v Speaker 2>felt honored too, because I was so close with them

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<v Speaker 2>and he was also close. So we always did anything

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<v Speaker 2>for the kids that needed to be done. We were

0:11:25.208 --> 0:11:28.768
<v Speaker 2>always spoiling them, and he saw how happy I was

0:11:28.808 --> 0:11:29.648
<v Speaker 2>with the kids too.

0:11:30.128 --> 0:11:32.648
<v Speaker 1>But it was around this time, three years into her

0:11:32.728 --> 0:11:36.328
<v Speaker 1>relationship with Sam, Sarah began to notice something had changed.

0:11:36.648 --> 0:11:39.088
<v Speaker 1>As Laura and Ben settled into the next chapter of

0:11:39.128 --> 0:11:41.808
<v Speaker 1>their lives, Sarah couldn't help but feel like her own

0:11:41.848 --> 0:11:43.888
<v Speaker 1>relationship was beginning to unravel.

0:11:44.288 --> 0:11:45.968
<v Speaker 3>I loved being there with the baby.

0:11:46.128 --> 0:11:48.728
<v Speaker 2>I was then feeling a bit clucky myself, but I

0:11:48.808 --> 0:11:51.048
<v Speaker 2>knew Sam wasn't ready to have kids at all.

0:11:51.688 --> 0:11:53.048
<v Speaker 3>Things changed over time.

0:11:53.288 --> 0:11:55.688
<v Speaker 2>He was still going out quite a lot, where Ben

0:11:55.728 --> 0:11:58.528
<v Speaker 2>had settled down and had the kids and wasn't going out,

0:11:58.808 --> 0:12:01.568
<v Speaker 2>and I was still at home waiting for Sam to

0:12:01.608 --> 0:12:03.648
<v Speaker 2>text me at thram to say if he was coming

0:12:03.688 --> 0:12:06.928
<v Speaker 2>home to me. It slowly made me lose trust because

0:12:06.968 --> 0:12:09.648
<v Speaker 2>I would be away all night waiting to hear from him,

0:12:10.008 --> 0:12:13.648
<v Speaker 2>and he wouldn't respond or come home. I would be

0:12:13.688 --> 0:12:17.168
<v Speaker 2>over at Laura's mum's house crying, saying like I can't like,

0:12:17.248 --> 0:12:19.607
<v Speaker 2>this is horrible. He's out drinking all weekend and I'm

0:12:19.608 --> 0:12:21.968
<v Speaker 2>the last thing on his mind. And her mum would

0:12:22.008 --> 0:12:23.888
<v Speaker 2>say like, You've got to think about this long term.

0:12:23.928 --> 0:12:27.408
<v Speaker 3>If you have children, what will that look like. Laura

0:12:27.488 --> 0:12:28.608
<v Speaker 3>was also supportive.

0:12:28.848 --> 0:12:30.648
<v Speaker 2>She was like, he'll grow out of it once you

0:12:30.728 --> 0:12:32.808
<v Speaker 2>have a child, and I was like, I don't know

0:12:32.848 --> 0:12:35.448
<v Speaker 2>if he will. Like there was those red flags at

0:12:35.488 --> 0:12:38.488
<v Speaker 2>the start, but it got worse I think over time,

0:12:38.608 --> 0:12:40.448
<v Speaker 2>because Laura had had a baby and she was at

0:12:40.448 --> 0:12:43.607
<v Speaker 2>home with her partner and they were so happy, where

0:12:43.728 --> 0:12:46.808
<v Speaker 2>my partner was still out drinking like they were eighteen again.

0:12:47.648 --> 0:12:50.048
<v Speaker 2>I'd constantly be leaning on Laura, being like, he's not

0:12:50.048 --> 0:12:52.688
<v Speaker 2>coming home, he's not answering, and she'd be the person

0:12:52.688 --> 0:12:54.568
<v Speaker 2>i'd call when we would have the big blow ups

0:12:54.568 --> 0:12:57.448
<v Speaker 2>and say, this has happened this time, what should I do?

0:12:58.088 --> 0:13:00.528
<v Speaker 3>And I just think he wasn't ready.

0:13:00.568 --> 0:13:02.608
<v Speaker 2>It maybe scared him a bit to see them settle

0:13:02.688 --> 0:13:05.408
<v Speaker 2>down and be happy, and he was like, no, I'm

0:13:05.408 --> 0:13:09.008
<v Speaker 2>not about that. Her advice would be, you can't keep

0:13:09.048 --> 0:13:11.728
<v Speaker 2>living like this in this anxiety state of when he's

0:13:11.728 --> 0:13:14.248
<v Speaker 2>coming home. And also it's not acceptable for him to

0:13:14.288 --> 0:13:16.248
<v Speaker 2>go out and not tell you if he's coming home

0:13:16.368 --> 0:13:18.648
<v Speaker 2>or not, because I obviously would think what about if

0:13:18.648 --> 0:13:22.528
<v Speaker 2>he's had an accident, something could have happened. And it

0:13:22.608 --> 0:13:26.048
<v Speaker 2>was just a constant state that I was constantly calling

0:13:26.168 --> 0:13:29.288
<v Speaker 2>Laura every weekend because this had happened. She was really

0:13:29.288 --> 0:13:32.488
<v Speaker 2>supportive if she'd listen. Her mum was supportive too, because we.

0:13:32.408 --> 0:13:33.408
<v Speaker 3>Were all close.

0:13:34.208 --> 0:13:37.008
<v Speaker 2>Laura and Sam still stayed very good friends through this

0:13:37.088 --> 0:13:40.408
<v Speaker 2>whole time. But she knew the other side of him

0:13:40.448 --> 0:13:43.448
<v Speaker 2>that probably no one else knew, that he was out

0:13:43.568 --> 0:13:46.328
<v Speaker 2>every weekend and could get nasty when he would drink

0:13:46.368 --> 0:13:49.768
<v Speaker 2>and just basically forget about all these responsibilities. So she

0:13:49.928 --> 0:13:53.488
<v Speaker 2>was always on my side, I felt, but she knew

0:13:53.568 --> 0:13:57.888
<v Speaker 2>more detail than anyone else. I always felt like Laura

0:13:58.568 --> 0:14:00.768
<v Speaker 2>was backing me one hundred percent. She would ask me

0:14:00.808 --> 0:14:03.208
<v Speaker 2>to come over if they were going out, so I

0:14:03.208 --> 0:14:06.048
<v Speaker 2>wouldn't be alone sitting at home. I would go over

0:14:06.088 --> 0:14:08.808
<v Speaker 2>and see the way they communicate Ben and Laura, and

0:14:08.848 --> 0:14:10.528
<v Speaker 2>then I would go home and see the way Sam

0:14:10.528 --> 0:14:13.208
<v Speaker 2>and I would communicate and it was completely different. I

0:14:13.288 --> 0:14:15.248
<v Speaker 2>wanted what they had in my head. They had the

0:14:15.288 --> 0:14:19.168
<v Speaker 2>fairy tale life, and I was living the worst life.

0:14:19.208 --> 0:14:21.488
<v Speaker 2>And a lot of people didn't know, apart from Laura,

0:14:21.728 --> 0:14:24.488
<v Speaker 2>how bad things had gotten at home. I think I

0:14:24.528 --> 0:14:27.248
<v Speaker 2>was embarrassed to admit that my relationship that looked so

0:14:27.328 --> 0:14:31.248
<v Speaker 2>good was so falling apart at home, like I would

0:14:31.288 --> 0:14:34.528
<v Speaker 2>spend every weekend alone, or I'd be with my friends constantly,

0:14:35.048 --> 0:14:37.848
<v Speaker 2>and everyone thought we were together and so happy, And

0:14:37.888 --> 0:14:40.688
<v Speaker 2>you don't want to admit that there's failure going on,

0:14:40.688 --> 0:14:42.168
<v Speaker 2>because once you admit it, you know.

0:14:42.208 --> 0:14:43.288
<v Speaker 3>That there is a problem.

0:14:44.168 --> 0:14:47.048
<v Speaker 2>I felt awkward to know that we were most likely

0:14:47.088 --> 0:14:49.528
<v Speaker 2>going to break up at this point, and I knew

0:14:49.568 --> 0:14:51.848
<v Speaker 2>it wouldn't just affect Sam and I. It was going

0:14:51.928 --> 0:14:54.128
<v Speaker 2>to affect our friendship group of the four of us

0:14:54.168 --> 0:14:57.288
<v Speaker 2>hanging out. Basically, Laura had known what was happening. We

0:14:57.288 --> 0:15:01.448
<v Speaker 2>were in couples therapy, we were discussing everything, and one

0:15:01.488 --> 0:15:03.048
<v Speaker 2>day I just woke up and said to her, like

0:15:03.448 --> 0:15:03.848
<v Speaker 2>I'm done.

0:15:03.968 --> 0:15:05.168
<v Speaker 3>I can't do this anymore.

0:15:05.488 --> 0:15:07.888
<v Speaker 2>And I still remember I went out and spoke to

0:15:07.928 --> 0:15:11.008
<v Speaker 2>Sam and I said, I can't live in anxious state anymore.

0:15:11.088 --> 0:15:14.968
<v Speaker 2>You're not changing your ways, you're not taking on anything

0:15:15.008 --> 0:15:18.488
<v Speaker 2>on board. And I remember Laura saying, like, You've got

0:15:18.528 --> 0:15:21.048
<v Speaker 2>to do what's best for you, but I'm really worried

0:15:21.088 --> 0:15:21.528
<v Speaker 2>about you.

0:15:22.848 --> 0:15:25.528
<v Speaker 1>It was only natural for Laura to be worried. Breakups

0:15:25.528 --> 0:15:28.648
<v Speaker 1>are never easy, and no one understands your heartbreak quite

0:15:28.728 --> 0:15:31.568
<v Speaker 1>like your best friend. Laura had been there through every moment,

0:15:31.808 --> 0:15:35.928
<v Speaker 1>heard every story, celebrated every milestone, and witnessed every red

0:15:35.968 --> 0:15:38.808
<v Speaker 1>flag and the cracks as they began to form. As

0:15:38.848 --> 0:15:41.288
<v Speaker 1>painful as it was to admit, Sarah knew breaking up

0:15:41.408 --> 0:15:43.928
<v Speaker 1>was the right decision, but she knew, no matter how hard,

0:15:43.968 --> 0:15:46.208
<v Speaker 1>the next stage was going to be, her best friend

0:15:46.248 --> 0:15:47.968
<v Speaker 1>would be right there by her side.

0:15:48.168 --> 0:15:50.248
<v Speaker 3>When I told Sam that you know I was done,

0:15:50.328 --> 0:15:52.168
<v Speaker 3>it was done. He was great.

0:15:52.248 --> 0:15:54.768
<v Speaker 2>For the first six weeks that we were separated, I

0:15:54.848 --> 0:15:57.568
<v Speaker 2>was still living there. Laura couldn't believe it, but we

0:15:57.648 --> 0:16:00.408
<v Speaker 2>still lived together. We still slept in the same bed.

0:16:00.648 --> 0:16:03.368
<v Speaker 2>Nothing ever happened, but I needed to find a place

0:16:03.408 --> 0:16:05.888
<v Speaker 2>for myself. He owned the place we were living in, so

0:16:06.048 --> 0:16:08.408
<v Speaker 2>I really had to start from scratch. I'd never lived

0:16:08.408 --> 0:16:10.688
<v Speaker 2>out a home before, and he said I could stay

0:16:10.728 --> 0:16:13.568
<v Speaker 2>as long as I needed. At that point, our relationship

0:16:13.568 --> 0:16:17.048
<v Speaker 2>had ended amicabul. We were fine, we were happy. We're

0:16:17.088 --> 0:16:19.528
<v Speaker 2>basically doing everything you'd do in a relationship apart from

0:16:19.528 --> 0:16:22.808
<v Speaker 2>the sexual sides of things. But then I noticed that

0:16:22.928 --> 0:16:26.888
<v Speaker 2>Laura was slowly moving away. There was just little things

0:16:26.928 --> 0:16:29.528
<v Speaker 2>I could tell. Wasn't asking too many questions about where

0:16:29.568 --> 0:16:31.088
<v Speaker 2>I was going to live or what I was going

0:16:31.168 --> 0:16:33.488
<v Speaker 2>to do. She kept just saying I'm really worried about

0:16:33.528 --> 0:16:36.608
<v Speaker 2>your mental health constantly. I think my mental health had

0:16:36.648 --> 0:16:39.208
<v Speaker 2>really declined in that relationship with Sam. I'd put on

0:16:39.248 --> 0:16:41.728
<v Speaker 2>a lot of weight. Looking back at the photos, I think,

0:16:41.928 --> 0:16:44.488
<v Speaker 2>oh my god, how had I got like that? So

0:16:44.568 --> 0:16:46.128
<v Speaker 2>I think she was worried that I would have a

0:16:46.208 --> 0:16:49.128
<v Speaker 2>mental breakdown. But to be honest, I was the happiest

0:16:49.168 --> 0:16:52.288
<v Speaker 2>i'd been making that decision in the last fourteen months

0:16:52.328 --> 0:16:55.408
<v Speaker 2>of the relationship. But she just kept saying I'm worried

0:16:55.408 --> 0:16:57.328
<v Speaker 2>about your mental health constant, and I was like, I

0:16:57.408 --> 0:17:01.088
<v Speaker 2>don't need that reminder about my mental health. And something

0:17:01.088 --> 0:17:03.928
<v Speaker 2>that sticks with me really vividly is at that time,

0:17:04.088 --> 0:17:07.368
<v Speaker 2>she kept tagging me on Instagram to win a wedding,

0:17:07.848 --> 0:17:09.848
<v Speaker 2>and eventually I had to say to it I have

0:17:09.888 --> 0:17:11.768
<v Speaker 2>to stop tagging me in this. I'm just going through

0:17:11.768 --> 0:17:15.008
<v Speaker 2>a major breakup and you're tagging me to win a wedding,

0:17:15.328 --> 0:17:16.528
<v Speaker 2>Like I can't do that.

0:17:16.808 --> 0:17:17.728
<v Speaker 3>Stop tagging me.

0:17:18.288 --> 0:17:21.328
<v Speaker 1>The split was an adjustment for everyone, having been so

0:17:21.568 --> 0:17:24.888
<v Speaker 1>entwined in each other's lives. Things felt a little awkward, sure,

0:17:25.208 --> 0:17:28.168
<v Speaker 1>but Sarah was confident everything would settle into the new

0:17:28.208 --> 0:17:31.167
<v Speaker 1>normal with time. For now, she just needed some space

0:17:31.208 --> 0:17:33.407
<v Speaker 1>to heal and look towards her next chapter.

0:17:33.768 --> 0:17:36.048
<v Speaker 2>I found my only little place, and I was happy.

0:17:36.088 --> 0:17:39.608
<v Speaker 2>I actually was like relieved. I wasn't crying myself to

0:17:39.648 --> 0:17:42.488
<v Speaker 2>sleep every night. I missed the friendship side of things

0:17:42.568 --> 0:17:45.728
<v Speaker 2>with Sam, but I knew I was a lot better.

0:17:45.768 --> 0:17:48.048
<v Speaker 2>I wasn't all weekends sitting up waiting for him to

0:17:48.048 --> 0:17:52.288
<v Speaker 2>text me. Laura was still making contact with me, kept

0:17:52.288 --> 0:17:54.488
<v Speaker 2>saying still worried about your mental health, and I was like,

0:17:54.728 --> 0:17:57.808
<v Speaker 2>I am good, Like you should pick up. I'm feeling great.

0:17:58.568 --> 0:18:02.048
<v Speaker 2>And then things slowly started to decline. I didn't hear

0:18:02.088 --> 0:18:04.407
<v Speaker 2>from her as much, even though I was reaching out.

0:18:04.448 --> 0:18:07.848
<v Speaker 2>But also I felt like if my friend was going

0:18:07.848 --> 0:18:10.368
<v Speaker 2>through a major breakup, I'd be there for them. It's

0:18:10.488 --> 0:18:13.048
<v Speaker 2>just showing up, dropping some food off or coming over

0:18:13.128 --> 0:18:15.808
<v Speaker 2>with the kids when it's the weekend. I was seeing

0:18:15.808 --> 0:18:17.888
<v Speaker 2>the kids for a little bit, but then it slowly

0:18:18.288 --> 0:18:21.048
<v Speaker 2>just changed. I'd got a new job, which I was

0:18:21.128 --> 0:18:23.648
<v Speaker 2>so thankful for, so like a fresh start, so I

0:18:23.648 --> 0:18:26.407
<v Speaker 2>didn't have those Mondays off anymore where i'd have the time,

0:18:26.688 --> 0:18:29.288
<v Speaker 2>so I really only had the weekends off, and then

0:18:29.808 --> 0:18:32.248
<v Speaker 2>her partner Ben would be around, so it kind of

0:18:32.288 --> 0:18:34.728
<v Speaker 2>changed the dynamic that the first time i'd seen Ben

0:18:34.768 --> 0:18:36.968
<v Speaker 2>after the breakup, it was like a little bit awkward,

0:18:37.528 --> 0:18:41.088
<v Speaker 2>but it just I think my lifestyle changed too. I

0:18:41.128 --> 0:18:43.968
<v Speaker 2>went from being in a relationship to all of a

0:18:44.008 --> 0:18:47.968
<v Speaker 2>sudden being single, living alone, working Monday to Friday again,

0:18:48.008 --> 0:18:50.288
<v Speaker 2>so I didn't have obviously as much time as I

0:18:50.368 --> 0:18:51.488
<v Speaker 2>used to go over there.

0:18:51.928 --> 0:18:53.768
<v Speaker 1>And then the inevitable happened.

0:18:54.208 --> 0:18:56.528
<v Speaker 2>I found out Sam had a new girlfriend because I

0:18:56.568 --> 0:18:58.848
<v Speaker 2>had keys still to his house. I was picking up

0:18:58.928 --> 0:19:00.687
<v Speaker 2>the dogs at this stage because we were still co

0:19:00.848 --> 0:19:03.568
<v Speaker 2>sharing them, and I went to the bathroom and saw

0:19:03.648 --> 0:19:07.648
<v Speaker 2>a face cleanser, So I knew there was a girl around,

0:19:07.768 --> 0:19:09.328
<v Speaker 2>but I didn't know it was that serious that we

0:19:09.328 --> 0:19:13.888
<v Speaker 2>will leave makeup products around, And that's basically when things

0:19:13.968 --> 0:19:16.448
<v Speaker 2>kicked off between us because it'd only been I think

0:19:16.488 --> 0:19:19.288
<v Speaker 2>about six to seven weeks i'd been moved out, and

0:19:19.368 --> 0:19:22.888
<v Speaker 2>to me, that was wild and things actually then got

0:19:23.008 --> 0:19:27.247
<v Speaker 2>quite nasty between us. So I'd messaged Laura and been like,

0:19:27.288 --> 0:19:30.608
<v Speaker 2>I've found this. She said I'd had an inkling he

0:19:30.728 --> 0:19:33.608
<v Speaker 2>was seeing someone. There had been talk amongst the boys.

0:19:34.168 --> 0:19:36.447
<v Speaker 2>I don't know how serious it is, but I know

0:19:36.568 --> 0:19:39.248
<v Speaker 2>they met at the local pub. But it hurt my

0:19:39.248 --> 0:19:41.208
<v Speaker 2>feelings because I think I would have rather found out

0:19:41.248 --> 0:19:44.447
<v Speaker 2>for Laura that hey, I've heard Sam's met someone, so

0:19:44.648 --> 0:19:46.608
<v Speaker 2>it's not that much of a shock to the system.

0:19:46.688 --> 0:19:51.207
<v Speaker 2>I could process it myself alone. I understood why she

0:19:51.248 --> 0:19:53.128
<v Speaker 2>probably didn't say anything because she knew it would have

0:19:53.208 --> 0:19:55.967
<v Speaker 2>hurt me, but I think I would have rather the

0:19:56.048 --> 0:19:59.008
<v Speaker 2>heads up to just know that was going on. And you,

0:19:59.128 --> 0:20:03.688
<v Speaker 2>obviously her pority is her partner, but I think, girl Codis,

0:20:03.728 --> 0:20:06.568
<v Speaker 2>you probably should have just mentioned something. It made me

0:20:06.608 --> 0:20:08.648
<v Speaker 2>feel like, what else do you know that's going on

0:20:08.728 --> 0:20:11.167
<v Speaker 2>that I don't really I know because I feel like

0:20:11.328 --> 0:20:14.407
<v Speaker 2>she felt a tug to be with her partner and

0:20:14.448 --> 0:20:17.008
<v Speaker 2>his friends and kind of ruled out that we'd known

0:20:17.048 --> 0:20:20.248
<v Speaker 2>each other since high school and we were actually the friends.

0:20:20.288 --> 0:20:23.568
<v Speaker 2>It wasn't you hadn't met me through your partner. I

0:20:23.608 --> 0:20:28.007
<v Speaker 2>felt abandoned, not only by the breakup with Sam, but

0:20:28.048 --> 0:20:31.648
<v Speaker 2>also I felt more hurt from the friendship with Laura

0:20:31.688 --> 0:20:34.808
<v Speaker 2>than my breakup, because it slowly started to decline. It

0:20:34.848 --> 0:20:36.808
<v Speaker 2>was like I was going through a breakup, but also

0:20:36.968 --> 0:20:39.168
<v Speaker 2>then it was starting to be a friendship breakup too,

0:20:39.848 --> 0:20:42.288
<v Speaker 2>So I really needed my best friend.

0:20:42.568 --> 0:20:45.848
<v Speaker 1>But just when Sarah needed her most, Laura went missing

0:20:45.888 --> 0:20:48.728
<v Speaker 1>from her life, at least in physical form.

0:20:49.408 --> 0:20:51.888
<v Speaker 2>I was on Instagram one day and I saw her

0:20:51.968 --> 0:20:55.968
<v Speaker 2>post a photo with Sam's new partner. We'd been broken

0:20:56.048 --> 0:20:58.448
<v Speaker 2>up for about three or four months at this stage,

0:20:58.648 --> 0:21:02.088
<v Speaker 2>and she posted a photo with her, and that broke

0:21:02.168 --> 0:21:04.608
<v Speaker 2>my heart, Like I could not believe that. I was

0:21:04.608 --> 0:21:08.488
<v Speaker 2>happy for Sam that he'd met someone new, but seeing

0:21:08.528 --> 0:21:10.608
<v Speaker 2>her post that photo with her, I was like, there

0:21:10.688 --> 0:21:12.408
<v Speaker 2>was no need to do that, because you know I'm

0:21:12.408 --> 0:21:15.448
<v Speaker 2>going to see that. I was just like, I would

0:21:15.528 --> 0:21:18.168
<v Speaker 2>never do that, because especially when you know that I'm

0:21:18.208 --> 0:21:21.248
<v Speaker 2>going to see it. I think you could have also said, hey,

0:21:21.368 --> 0:21:24.088
<v Speaker 2>I'm going to an event. Sam's new partner's going to

0:21:24.088 --> 0:21:25.528
<v Speaker 2>be there, and I would have said thanks for the

0:21:25.568 --> 0:21:28.888
<v Speaker 2>heads up, but posting it on social media for everyone

0:21:28.928 --> 0:21:31.568
<v Speaker 2>to see that knewest both and knew that Sam and

0:21:31.608 --> 0:21:33.128
<v Speaker 2>I were together and had broken up.

0:21:33.168 --> 0:21:34.608
<v Speaker 3>It was really just.

0:21:34.488 --> 0:21:36.488
<v Speaker 2>Like a sting to my heart. It hurt more than

0:21:36.568 --> 0:21:40.368
<v Speaker 2>the breakup with Sam. And then constantly more photos were

0:21:40.408 --> 0:21:43.808
<v Speaker 2>appearing of them together or they're made events together, and

0:21:44.048 --> 0:21:47.128
<v Speaker 2>it just at that point I wasn't really hearing from

0:21:47.208 --> 0:21:49.768
<v Speaker 2>Laura anymore. I did bring it up with her because

0:21:50.048 --> 0:21:52.528
<v Speaker 2>I said stop, like I don't want to see any

0:21:52.568 --> 0:21:54.328
<v Speaker 2>of that. And that's when I took a step back

0:21:54.328 --> 0:21:58.168
<v Speaker 2>and actually blocked myself from viewing her stories because I thought,

0:21:58.208 --> 0:22:00.688
<v Speaker 2>if this is going to keep coming up constantly, it's

0:22:00.688 --> 0:22:02.608
<v Speaker 2>best for me and my mental health to just put

0:22:02.648 --> 0:22:04.368
<v Speaker 2>a stop to it so I can't see it at all.

0:22:05.088 --> 0:22:07.408
<v Speaker 2>I know I would just keep looking at the stories NonStop,

0:22:07.448 --> 0:22:09.128
<v Speaker 2>and then that gets worse and worse and.

0:22:09.088 --> 0:22:10.328
<v Speaker 3>You end up in a hole.

0:22:10.528 --> 0:22:12.687
<v Speaker 2>And I didn't really want to see them with the

0:22:12.768 --> 0:22:14.687
<v Speaker 2>new partner with the kids either, because that would have

0:22:14.688 --> 0:22:16.728
<v Speaker 2>really hurt me because at this stage I hadn't seen

0:22:16.768 --> 0:22:20.128
<v Speaker 2>the kids for ages and like they were such a

0:22:20.128 --> 0:22:22.568
<v Speaker 2>big part of my life, and then I just stopped

0:22:22.568 --> 0:22:24.608
<v Speaker 2>seeing them all of a sudden, I.

0:22:24.608 --> 0:22:26.008
<v Speaker 3>Never heard from them anymore.

0:22:26.288 --> 0:22:28.088
<v Speaker 2>I had reached out a couple of times, but at

0:22:28.088 --> 0:22:30.448
<v Speaker 2>that point I had felt like I was left on

0:22:30.488 --> 0:22:32.808
<v Speaker 2>an island by myself, like when there should have been

0:22:32.808 --> 0:22:35.928
<v Speaker 2>people supporting me. And I guess my other friends really

0:22:35.968 --> 0:22:38.167
<v Speaker 2>stepped up in that and showed me they're around for

0:22:38.328 --> 0:22:41.288
<v Speaker 2>a major breakup. When big life events happen, that's when

0:22:41.288 --> 0:22:43.368
<v Speaker 2>you find out who really is around you.

0:22:43.768 --> 0:22:46.288
<v Speaker 1>Sarah was hurt by Laura as apparent lack of empathy

0:22:46.408 --> 0:22:48.968
<v Speaker 1>or understanding, but she didn't see it as the end

0:22:49.008 --> 0:22:52.008
<v Speaker 1>of their friendship. That was until word got back to

0:22:52.048 --> 0:22:55.248
<v Speaker 1>her about how Laura was describing what had happened between them.

0:22:55.488 --> 0:22:58.088
<v Speaker 2>There was a school reunion, someone asked, do you still

0:22:58.088 --> 0:23:01.488
<v Speaker 2>see Sarah and they explained that things had changed because

0:23:01.488 --> 0:23:03.208
<v Speaker 2>of the breakup, and basically at the end of the

0:23:03.288 --> 0:23:06.568
<v Speaker 2>day they had to pick Ben over myself. And to

0:23:06.608 --> 0:23:08.768
<v Speaker 2>hear that even cut me deeper to the point where

0:23:08.808 --> 0:23:10.808
<v Speaker 2>I said, well, that's what you're going to be like

0:23:11.048 --> 0:23:12.967
<v Speaker 2>it's I don't want to be a part of that

0:23:13.088 --> 0:23:16.687
<v Speaker 2>friendship or around people like that. The first six months

0:23:16.888 --> 0:23:19.568
<v Speaker 2>was really hard. I was still happy that Sam and

0:23:19.608 --> 0:23:21.208
<v Speaker 2>I had broken up. I knew it was the right

0:23:21.208 --> 0:23:24.487
<v Speaker 2>thing to do, but doesn't make it any less lonely,

0:23:24.608 --> 0:23:27.728
<v Speaker 2>especially when Laura, who was meant to be my best

0:23:27.728 --> 0:23:29.808
<v Speaker 2>friend I thought would be there for me. It was

0:23:29.928 --> 0:23:32.328
<v Speaker 2>really I still remember those nights by myself in the

0:23:32.448 --> 0:23:35.608
<v Speaker 2>unit being lonely, and it took a while to get

0:23:35.688 --> 0:23:37.528
<v Speaker 2>used to it and be able to realize I can

0:23:37.608 --> 0:23:39.808
<v Speaker 2>lean on my other friendships in my group, and that's

0:23:39.848 --> 0:23:44.568
<v Speaker 2>when those friendships really got strong and developed, because I

0:23:44.648 --> 0:23:47.487
<v Speaker 2>knew that I really needed some company and they were

0:23:47.528 --> 0:23:50.208
<v Speaker 2>there to help me out. There'd be lots of times

0:23:50.248 --> 0:23:52.288
<v Speaker 2>when I'd be sad and I just want to call her,

0:23:52.368 --> 0:23:56.448
<v Speaker 2>but I'd remember I'm calling her to discuss our friendship

0:23:56.488 --> 0:23:58.888
<v Speaker 2>and what's happened, and turned to her for advice. So

0:23:59.528 --> 0:24:01.608
<v Speaker 2>it did get hard because when you go through a

0:24:01.648 --> 0:24:03.648
<v Speaker 2>big breakup in your life, you just want your best

0:24:03.688 --> 0:24:06.368
<v Speaker 2>friend because they're there to support you to make you

0:24:06.528 --> 0:24:07.407
<v Speaker 2>feel great.

0:24:07.248 --> 0:24:09.168
<v Speaker 3>And I just didn't have that at all.

0:24:09.208 --> 0:24:11.608
<v Speaker 2>I couldn't really turned to her, so I turned to

0:24:11.648 --> 0:24:14.008
<v Speaker 2>all the other friends in my life that were there

0:24:14.048 --> 0:24:16.528
<v Speaker 2>and work colleagues that were there every day to see

0:24:16.568 --> 0:24:20.768
<v Speaker 2>me if I was upset, crying, happy. All those different aspects.

0:24:21.248 --> 0:24:24.328
<v Speaker 2>The fading off happened slowly, probably over the three six months,

0:24:24.328 --> 0:24:27.008
<v Speaker 2>and then one day it was just there is really

0:24:27.048 --> 0:24:28.927
<v Speaker 2>no friendship anymore. It's gotten to the point where it

0:24:28.968 --> 0:24:32.288
<v Speaker 2>was too awkward for someone to speak out and say, hey,

0:24:33.288 --> 0:24:36.128
<v Speaker 2>what's going on between us, like let's get together and

0:24:36.168 --> 0:24:39.128
<v Speaker 2>have a coffee. It'd just gone too far from that point.

0:24:40.008 --> 0:24:42.768
<v Speaker 2>I sometimes would consider it, but then I thought, I've

0:24:42.808 --> 0:24:46.447
<v Speaker 2>been through the traumatic relationship breakup, so why am I

0:24:46.608 --> 0:24:48.568
<v Speaker 2>reaching out to someone who should be there for me

0:24:48.688 --> 0:24:50.768
<v Speaker 2>when I've been there for them? And I know that's

0:24:50.808 --> 0:24:52.608
<v Speaker 2>a bit childish, but at the end of the day,

0:24:52.648 --> 0:24:55.328
<v Speaker 2>you grow up and think, do I want this person

0:24:55.368 --> 0:24:56.848
<v Speaker 2>in my life if this is how they're going to

0:24:56.888 --> 0:24:59.288
<v Speaker 2>treat me when something major happens.

0:25:00.008 --> 0:25:03.968
<v Speaker 1>So they never could up. They never had the conversation. Now,

0:25:04.128 --> 0:25:07.528
<v Speaker 1>almost eight years later, Sarah is still left without the

0:25:07.568 --> 0:25:10.768
<v Speaker 1>one thing she's been wanting this whole time. Closure.

0:25:11.408 --> 0:25:14.128
<v Speaker 2>It's been eight years since the breakup with Sam, and

0:25:14.168 --> 0:25:15.968
<v Speaker 2>I think to this day it still affects me more

0:25:16.008 --> 0:25:17.927
<v Speaker 2>the friendship breakdown with Laura.

0:25:18.688 --> 0:25:21.648
<v Speaker 3>I think about her all the time, not.

0:25:21.728 --> 0:25:23.528
<v Speaker 2>In a creepy way, as in a way of where

0:25:23.568 --> 0:25:26.008
<v Speaker 2>you would be where she'd be fitting into my life.

0:25:26.048 --> 0:25:26.328
<v Speaker 3>Now.

0:25:26.888 --> 0:25:29.008
<v Speaker 2>I'm still single, so I don't know where she'd fit

0:25:29.048 --> 0:25:31.328
<v Speaker 2>in because she's obviously still engaged and has got the

0:25:31.368 --> 0:25:33.888
<v Speaker 2>two children who have grown up. But I think, oh,

0:25:34.128 --> 0:25:37.447
<v Speaker 2>she'd be here for these milestones like my thirtieth birthday,

0:25:37.968 --> 0:25:42.128
<v Speaker 2>just major life milestones that like my friends now support

0:25:42.128 --> 0:25:44.688
<v Speaker 2>me on and I support them. So I still think,

0:25:44.768 --> 0:25:46.848
<v Speaker 2>like I still still got the photos from when we

0:25:46.888 --> 0:25:49.648
<v Speaker 2>were in high school, and I just think where my

0:25:49.808 --> 0:25:53.328
<v Speaker 2>life would be differently now. I guess I think the

0:25:53.368 --> 0:25:57.967
<v Speaker 2>heartbreak of losing Laura has now turned into more of

0:25:58.008 --> 0:26:02.328
<v Speaker 2>a negative experience in my head or more of a disappointment.

0:26:02.608 --> 0:26:05.608
<v Speaker 2>I always think, oh, how would I act if I

0:26:05.728 --> 0:26:07.888
<v Speaker 2>was in that point of view now, and it's just

0:26:07.928 --> 0:26:08.608
<v Speaker 2>turning into.

0:26:08.448 --> 0:26:10.448
<v Speaker 3>More of a grudge.

0:26:10.488 --> 0:26:13.048
<v Speaker 2>I would say, like, I really think of her, and

0:26:13.088 --> 0:26:15.328
<v Speaker 2>I think of a grudge, and it makes me angry

0:26:15.408 --> 0:26:18.687
<v Speaker 2>and also upset that that's how our friendship ended and

0:26:18.728 --> 0:26:20.888
<v Speaker 2>that we're no longer.

0:26:20.568 --> 0:26:22.088
<v Speaker 3>Friends at all.

0:26:22.168 --> 0:26:25.328
<v Speaker 2>I really missed the kids, especially after we'd become godparents,

0:26:25.328 --> 0:26:27.407
<v Speaker 2>Like I was so close with those kids. I was

0:26:27.408 --> 0:26:30.648
<v Speaker 2>there for all the nappy changes, the vomits, the bottle feeds,

0:26:31.168 --> 0:26:34.048
<v Speaker 2>and it just made me weary now that anyone I

0:26:34.088 --> 0:26:36.247
<v Speaker 2>meet with kids like, I try not to get too

0:26:36.288 --> 0:26:39.167
<v Speaker 2>attached or too close to just because I'd never want to, Like,

0:26:39.768 --> 0:26:42.088
<v Speaker 2>you know, the kids were too young, they wouldn't remember me,

0:26:42.288 --> 0:26:43.688
<v Speaker 2>but I remember them, and.

0:26:43.728 --> 0:26:46.808
<v Speaker 3>Like, it was just really upsetting to miss the kids.

0:26:47.488 --> 0:26:49.848
<v Speaker 2>I look back at our friendship and I see the

0:26:49.928 --> 0:26:52.927
<v Speaker 2>happy times and how much Laura helped me at that

0:26:52.968 --> 0:26:57.008
<v Speaker 2>time in my life, but also it just disappointed me. Really,

0:26:57.168 --> 0:27:01.768
<v Speaker 2>I probably wouldn't really get involved with someone's partner's friend now.

0:27:01.848 --> 0:27:03.888
<v Speaker 2>I'd be very weary because I feel like it can

0:27:03.968 --> 0:27:07.407
<v Speaker 2>break up friendship, so I'd never cross that bridge again.

0:27:08.048 --> 0:27:11.488
<v Speaker 2>And I just am that that's how the friendship ended,

0:27:11.528 --> 0:27:14.488
<v Speaker 2>and there was never really any closure. If I went

0:27:14.608 --> 0:27:16.568
<v Speaker 2>back in time and thought about what could have changed,

0:27:16.608 --> 0:27:19.288
<v Speaker 2>I probably would have called her out when I noticed

0:27:19.328 --> 0:27:21.808
<v Speaker 2>she started drifting away, especially when I'd moved into my

0:27:21.848 --> 0:27:24.288
<v Speaker 2>own place. That's probably when I would have said, hey, like,

0:27:24.408 --> 0:27:28.048
<v Speaker 2>is everything okay. I've noticed you've been distanced, but in hindsight,

0:27:28.768 --> 0:27:29.687
<v Speaker 2>there's nothing I can do.

0:27:29.808 --> 0:27:30.808
<v Speaker 3>That's how it's ended.

0:27:32.728 --> 0:27:35.808
<v Speaker 2>I think people come into your life at certain times

0:27:35.808 --> 0:27:37.928
<v Speaker 2>in your life where you need that person and they

0:27:38.008 --> 0:27:43.488
<v Speaker 2>leave because that job's been done. Every relationship breakup, I

0:27:43.528 --> 0:27:46.248
<v Speaker 2>look back and think, what have I learned from that relationship?

0:27:46.368 --> 0:27:48.128
<v Speaker 2>What could I walk away and say I learned this

0:27:48.248 --> 0:27:50.167
<v Speaker 2>because I was in this relationship. And that's what I

0:27:50.208 --> 0:27:52.128
<v Speaker 2>look back with Laura. I go, what have I learned

0:27:52.128 --> 0:27:55.128
<v Speaker 2>from that friendship breakup? And I look that I will

0:27:55.128 --> 0:27:58.487
<v Speaker 2>always treat my friends with respect, always be open and communicate,

0:27:58.888 --> 0:28:01.128
<v Speaker 2>and when someone's going through a hard time, turn up

0:28:01.208 --> 0:28:03.608
<v Speaker 2>even if they say I don't need anything, they just

0:28:03.648 --> 0:28:05.368
<v Speaker 2>need a hug. Turn up at their front door and

0:28:05.448 --> 0:28:07.648
<v Speaker 2>say I'm here. We don't need to speak, but I'm

0:28:07.688 --> 0:28:09.768
<v Speaker 2>here for you.

0:28:23.288 --> 0:28:26.408
<v Speaker 1>Everyone Has an Ex Best Friend is a Mintimedia production

0:28:26.608 --> 0:28:29.128
<v Speaker 1>and proudly part of the Mum and mea network. This

0:28:29.288 --> 0:28:32.488
<v Speaker 1>interview was conducted by me Georgia Love and written and

0:28:32.528 --> 0:28:35.008
<v Speaker 1>produced by Linda Scott. If you have a story you'd

0:28:35.048 --> 0:28:38.328
<v Speaker 1>like to share, email Everyone has an Ex at Mintimedia

0:28:38.408 --> 0:28:41.208
<v Speaker 1>dot com dot au. You can support us by following

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<v Speaker 1>the show in your favorite podcast app and leaving us

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<v Speaker 1>a five star review