WEBVTT - Invisible String 0:00:10.888 --> 0:00:13.648 You're listening to a Mother Mer podcast. 0:00:14.288 --> 0:00:17.768 Muma Mer acknowledges the traditional owners of the land and waters. 0:00:17.848 --> 0:00:20.848 This podcast is recorded on. This episode deals with a 0:00:20.928 --> 0:00:26.008 number of sensitive topics, including grief, pregnancy issues, and postnatal depression. 0:00:26.168 --> 0:00:35.968 Listener discretion is advised. There are some love stories that 0:00:36.208 --> 0:00:38.928 from day one just tug on the old heart strings. 0:00:39.208 --> 0:00:43.208 Nothing crazy, nothing dramatic, just old fashioned boy meets girl, 0:00:43.448 --> 0:00:44.528 they fall in love. 0:00:44.608 --> 0:00:45.928 And the rest is history. 0:00:46.248 --> 0:00:48.768 I didn't really know what love was. I didn't understand it, 0:00:48.808 --> 0:00:51.848 but I knew there was something, and honestly, from that 0:00:51.928 --> 0:00:56.288 first meeting, that was it. We fell madly in love. 0:00:56.968 --> 0:01:01.288 From that moment, I believed and I knew that I 0:01:01.328 --> 0:01:02.528 was living a fairy tale. 0:01:03.408 --> 0:01:05.728 But the thing with fairy tales is we never get 0:01:05.768 --> 0:01:09.128 the whole story. Is there really such thing as happily 0:01:09.168 --> 0:01:10.608 ever after forever? 0:01:10.888 --> 0:01:13.167 I do remember thinking it's too good to be true, 0:01:14.087 --> 0:01:15.768 and so I did have this in the back of 0:01:15.768 --> 0:01:20.008 my mind, and I would often think to myself, don't 0:01:20.008 --> 0:01:23.447 get too caught up in the fairy tale ash because 0:01:23.448 --> 0:01:24.167 it's too good. 0:01:33.928 --> 0:01:36.328 I'm Georgia Love and this is everyone has an eggs. 0:01:36.568 --> 0:01:38.688 Come with me as we dive into a collection of 0:01:38.808 --> 0:01:43.088 unconventional stories about relationships past through the eyes and the 0:01:43.128 --> 0:01:46.328 hearts of the very people who lived them. The year 0:01:46.568 --> 0:01:50.528 was two thousand and eight, actually was just seventeen, and 0:01:50.568 --> 0:01:52.528 the way you met boys back then was a little 0:01:52.528 --> 0:01:55.408 different to now, but the way she met Matt was 0:01:55.448 --> 0:01:56.408 different even for then. 0:01:56.888 --> 0:02:00.088 I had lost my grandfather to Leakemia, and that was 0:02:00.088 --> 0:02:03.808 actually my first experience with death, so I really struggled 0:02:03.848 --> 0:02:07.248 with that, and I decided to do some work with 0:02:07.248 --> 0:02:10.128 the Lakemia Foundation, and they have a really beautiful annual 0:02:10.127 --> 0:02:14.488 event called Light the Night, where each city hosts an 0:02:14.728 --> 0:02:17.928 event where you have beautiful lanterns and you do a 0:02:17.928 --> 0:02:21.768 city walk at sort of twilight, and different colored balloons 0:02:21.808 --> 0:02:24.928 represent whether you're honoring someone or remembering someone, or if 0:02:24.928 --> 0:02:27.048 you're a survivor. So I signed up to that event, 0:02:27.808 --> 0:02:29.928 and I didn't realize at the time that I was 0:02:29.968 --> 0:02:33.528 actually the youngest person to register for that event. So 0:02:34.328 --> 0:02:37.368 the local newspaper contacted me on behalf of the Leukemia 0:02:37.407 --> 0:02:40.528 Foundation and said, we'd just love to share the reason 0:02:40.568 --> 0:02:42.528 that you signed up to this event so that it 0:02:42.608 --> 0:02:45.448 might inspire others to join. And I just said, oh, sure, 0:02:45.568 --> 0:02:49.808 I'm happy too, and did that interview and gave a photograph, 0:02:49.888 --> 0:02:52.528 and I didn't think much of it. And then I 0:02:52.568 --> 0:02:55.408 remember the morning that that newspaper was published, and my 0:02:55.488 --> 0:02:58.888 dad walked in to the room and he just held 0:02:58.928 --> 0:03:01.928 up this paper and he said, oh my god, you 0:03:01.968 --> 0:03:05.208 are on the front page of the newspaper. And I 0:03:05.248 --> 0:03:08.728 was a bit mortified at seventeen years old. But what 0:03:08.848 --> 0:03:13.847 I didn't realize was that a few days later Matt 0:03:14.368 --> 0:03:17.968 would see that newspaper. His mum just happened to pick 0:03:18.048 --> 0:03:21.208 up the newspaper that day and he happened to see it. 0:03:21.688 --> 0:03:26.248 And from there he added me on Facebook. Sorry, he 0:03:26.288 --> 0:03:30.128 added me on MySpace because Facebook wasn't even a thing yet. 0:03:30.328 --> 0:03:33.088 He sent me a message and said, I think we 0:03:33.088 --> 0:03:37.008 should catch up. And in my head, I'm going read alert, 0:03:37.048 --> 0:03:41.288 read alert, absolutely not stranger danger, And I knew nothing 0:03:41.328 --> 0:03:46.568 about him. Complete strangers, no mutual friends, know nothing. There 0:03:46.568 --> 0:03:48.808 were a few back and forward messages and eventually I said. 0:03:48.688 --> 0:03:52.128 Yes, So, still a high school student, actually went to 0:03:52.168 --> 0:03:55.008 meet this twenty year old stranger at a cafe in town. 0:03:55.528 --> 0:04:01.608 I saw this tall, handsome guy, really well built, clearly athletic. 0:04:02.568 --> 0:04:04.928 He started telling me that he was really into cricket, 0:04:05.048 --> 0:04:07.248 and we had to meet late because he had cricket 0:04:07.248 --> 0:04:11.368 training first, so that was the priority, and I knew 0:04:11.368 --> 0:04:15.048 nothing about cricket. I was like, okay, I've got nothing here. 0:04:15.168 --> 0:04:17.928 I'm a ballerina. You play cricket like we are, so 0:04:18.207 --> 0:04:21.328 world's apart. And so that's all I knew of him. 0:04:22.128 --> 0:04:25.008 Was just that first meeting. We met up for the 0:04:25.048 --> 0:04:28.927 first time, and I think we were talking NonStop for 0:04:28.967 --> 0:04:32.088 about four hours straight. And it was a school night 0:04:32.087 --> 0:04:33.568 and I went, I've got to get home, like I'm 0:04:33.568 --> 0:04:38.327 still in grade twelve, and that was our first meeting, 0:04:38.648 --> 0:04:44.528 and it was just so easy, and that moment was 0:04:44.648 --> 0:04:49.688 just this feeling of I really like this guy. There's 0:04:49.727 --> 0:04:53.888 something about him that is just truly special. I don't 0:04:53.888 --> 0:04:56.328 know what it is, and I'd never really experienced that 0:04:56.327 --> 0:04:58.208 because I was only seventeen, so I didn't really know 0:04:58.248 --> 0:05:00.448 what love was. I didn't understand it, but I knew 0:05:00.448 --> 0:05:04.527 there was something. And honestly, from that first meeting, that 0:05:04.688 --> 0:05:07.647 was it. The first kiss happened on that first meeting 0:05:08.207 --> 0:05:13.128 that was prompted by me, and I just felt like, 0:05:13.368 --> 0:05:17.568 there's something wonderful about this guy. There was just this 0:05:18.488 --> 0:05:22.967 instant connection and instant safety and happiness. I think we 0:05:23.048 --> 0:05:27.968 only had maybe two or three dates until we made 0:05:28.008 --> 0:05:31.328 it official, and I remember him asking me to be 0:05:31.448 --> 0:05:35.767 his girlfriend, and it was an instant yes. It was like, well, obviously, 0:05:36.768 --> 0:05:40.128 it felt like the obvious step, like of course we 0:05:40.128 --> 0:05:42.688 were going to start dating and of course were going 0:05:42.727 --> 0:05:46.488 to be official. We didn't think we had anything in common, 0:05:47.168 --> 0:05:52.248 but then after meeting, we then made our life in common. 0:05:52.967 --> 0:05:57.568 So I chose to learn about cricket and you know, 0:05:57.688 --> 0:06:05.487 he appreciated ballet, and we appreciated each other's interests without 0:06:05.688 --> 0:06:08.807 ever hijacking or feeling that we needed to truly be 0:06:08.888 --> 0:06:11.448 part of that world. For me, it was very much 0:06:11.488 --> 0:06:15.768 around cricket's your thing, and I'll support you, but like 0:06:15.808 --> 0:06:18.808 you do you and vice versa. So we never had 0:06:18.808 --> 0:06:23.368 to really find commonalities because we just created new ones together. 0:06:24.248 --> 0:06:27.607 I think officially I said I love you at around 0:06:27.607 --> 0:06:30.767 six months I'd already been feeling it for a long time, 0:06:31.528 --> 0:06:34.528 and Matt said the same. He said, well, I love 0:06:34.568 --> 0:06:38.727 you too, and that was it. It was just like 0:06:39.128 --> 0:06:41.767 sort of this obvious statement that we just finally said 0:06:41.768 --> 0:06:42.247 out loud. 0:06:42.607 --> 0:06:46.368 That was that a young, happy, easy love, but that 0:06:46.408 --> 0:06:49.408 would make this a pretty short story, so let's delve 0:06:49.488 --> 0:06:52.048 into how these budding young romance progressed. 0:06:52.248 --> 0:06:54.927 Because I was seventeen and just finishing school. The first 0:06:55.008 --> 0:06:58.488 year was I was first year UNI. He was also 0:06:58.528 --> 0:07:02.008 in UNI, so we had completely random timetables through the day, 0:07:02.568 --> 0:07:05.888 and so there was a lot of just catching up 0:07:05.888 --> 0:07:08.408 when we could. You know, often, like Friday nights through 0:07:08.408 --> 0:07:11.768 to the weekend was sort of more formal time together 0:07:12.088 --> 0:07:14.328 and you know, actually arranging a proper date or a 0:07:14.328 --> 0:07:17.008 proper catch up with friends. But during the week we 0:07:17.048 --> 0:07:20.608 did have some time during classes where we could see 0:07:20.607 --> 0:07:22.808 each other or have a quick coffee or something like that. 0:07:22.968 --> 0:07:26.568 So it was very much just finding those little pieces 0:07:26.568 --> 0:07:32.168 of time to see each other. Sometimes that meant a 0:07:32.288 --> 0:07:35.288 drive by kiss, and so literally Matt would call and say, 0:07:35.328 --> 0:07:38.448 I'm driving home from UNI, but I've got to get home, 0:07:38.688 --> 0:07:41.848 usually for cricket training. But I'm driving past your house 0:07:42.168 --> 0:07:45.248 and I've got about two minutes. So it was worth 0:07:45.288 --> 0:07:47.448 it to just see him for two minutes. And I 0:07:47.488 --> 0:07:49.528 remember he would pull up at the house. He wouldn't 0:07:49.528 --> 0:07:51.047 even open the door he come in. He would literally 0:07:51.048 --> 0:07:53.048 just stay in the car and I'd run downstairs give 0:07:53.128 --> 0:07:55.088 him a kiss. And off he'd go to cricket training 0:07:55.208 --> 0:07:59.328 and all of these little micro moments which we just 0:07:59.408 --> 0:08:02.088 made work. And we just wanted to see each other, 0:08:02.248 --> 0:08:05.488 so we made the effort. And was it a detour, sure, 0:08:06.528 --> 0:08:10.687 but two minutes was better than nothing. He made me 0:08:10.688 --> 0:08:16.968 feel loved. He made me feel that together we were unstoppable, 0:08:17.968 --> 0:08:20.528 but that as an individual, I was also unstoppable. So 0:08:20.607 --> 0:08:23.128 he gave me such a self belief that I didn't 0:08:23.288 --> 0:08:28.168 really believe in myself. Do you hear stories that relationships 0:08:28.168 --> 0:08:30.408 can be hard work and that you've got to, you know, 0:08:30.448 --> 0:08:32.328 show up for each other. And I never felt that 0:08:32.488 --> 0:08:38.608 I felt happy. I felt safe because I was, and 0:08:38.648 --> 0:08:41.648 I just I never you know, I constantly lived on 0:08:41.688 --> 0:08:45.008 cloud nine. And it feels a little bit naive to 0:08:45.168 --> 0:08:47.808 think that life is like that, but I was in 0:08:47.848 --> 0:08:53.328 this complete fairy tale every day, whether it be going 0:08:53.328 --> 0:08:55.487 to the beach, going to the movies, you know, it's 0:08:55.528 --> 0:08:59.727 going to lunch. Often it was very mundane, normal things. 0:08:59.768 --> 0:09:03.128 We weren't doing anything extravagant. We weren't even trying to 0:09:03.168 --> 0:09:06.848 impress each other by paying for a beautiful lunch or 0:09:06.888 --> 0:09:10.288 going on a holiday. It was we actually newly just 0:09:10.328 --> 0:09:12.728 wanted to be together and if that meant doing the 0:09:12.728 --> 0:09:16.288 grocery shopping, so be it. There was never any feeling 0:09:16.368 --> 0:09:19.808 of pressure that we had to do anything. A lot 0:09:19.808 --> 0:09:23.288 of that came down to even moments, like Matt did 0:09:23.288 --> 0:09:26.488 a lot of work in regional Queensland and there were 0:09:26.528 --> 0:09:29.008 opportunities at times for me to just travel with him, 0:09:29.448 --> 0:09:32.328 and so there would be I remember a particular series 0:09:32.368 --> 0:09:36.728 of weekends where he was doing these clinics about probably 0:09:36.808 --> 0:09:40.368 four hour drive from Brisbane on the weekend. I mean, well, 0:09:40.408 --> 0:09:44.008 I work Monday to Friday, so I won't then see 0:09:44.008 --> 0:09:46.488 you on the weekend. So then I just decided to 0:09:46.488 --> 0:09:48.768 go with him, and so it just meant sitting in 0:09:48.768 --> 0:09:50.808 the car for four hours and then we would arrive, 0:09:51.008 --> 0:09:52.328 he would work and I would just sit in a 0:09:52.408 --> 0:09:55.488 cafe on my laptop working as well. But then we 0:09:55.568 --> 0:09:59.808 got four hours together because we just wanted to be together. 0:09:59.888 --> 0:10:01.688 And a lot of people thought, oh, that's crazy, then 0:10:01.688 --> 0:10:05.168 you've lost your weekend. Absolutely not, I've just gained eight 0:10:05.208 --> 0:10:09.048 hours in the car. So it was really simple stuff. 0:10:09.288 --> 0:10:13.128 Nothing I said, nothing extravagant, just genuinely being together. We 0:10:13.168 --> 0:10:15.568 never rushed anything because we never felt we needed to, 0:10:16.488 --> 0:10:20.008 and so there was just this really organic life that 0:10:20.048 --> 0:10:25.408 we had. I then moved out, and despite Matt living 0:10:25.488 --> 0:10:27.568 at home, he thought it would be really good for 0:10:27.568 --> 0:10:29.888 me to move out with a friend first. And he 0:10:29.968 --> 0:10:31.768 just said, I just think that you need that. I 0:10:31.768 --> 0:10:35.928 think that would be really great for you. And I 0:10:35.968 --> 0:10:38.368 was like, yeah, great idea. He was still living at 0:10:38.408 --> 0:10:43.008 home and we just continued life. Because we met so young, 0:10:43.088 --> 0:10:45.408 we were often spending a lot of time together in 0:10:45.448 --> 0:10:49.928 our family homes, and so Matt's family welcomed me with 0:10:50.008 --> 0:10:54.928 open arms and my family the same. So I often 0:10:55.048 --> 0:10:58.248 laughed because I always felt like Matt and my sister 0:10:58.288 --> 0:11:00.768 got along so well. And I used to joke, I'm like, 0:11:00.808 --> 0:11:02.608 am I the third wheel here? Because you guys are 0:11:02.648 --> 0:11:06.128 like really besties? And that was really beautiful for me. 0:11:06.368 --> 0:11:10.368 I am, you know, that protective big sister. And to 0:11:10.488 --> 0:11:16.007 see that my boyfriend and sister get along so beautifully 0:11:16.128 --> 0:11:19.328 just meant a lot to me. And so that was 0:11:19.328 --> 0:11:22.488 always really special. And to know that Matt was now 0:11:23.048 --> 0:11:25.608 already even in those early days, he was just part 0:11:25.608 --> 0:11:28.168 of our family, and really my family just sort of 0:11:28.208 --> 0:11:32.248 adopted this sort of no brainer approach, like, well, of course, 0:11:32.288 --> 0:11:34.727 he's part of our family, and that happened really early, 0:11:34.768 --> 0:11:37.448 so again that was another feeling of well, this is 0:11:37.528 --> 0:11:40.848 just meant to be. There was never any doubt in 0:11:40.848 --> 0:11:42.648 my mind that we would be together forever. 0:11:43.128 --> 0:11:45.688 By the time they'd both finished UNI and got jobs, 0:11:45.928 --> 0:11:47.408 the next step was natural. 0:11:47.688 --> 0:11:50.328 We decided to move in together. I would say it 0:11:50.328 --> 0:11:52.848 was only three months later that we then said, let's 0:11:52.848 --> 0:11:55.528 buy a house. So, yeah, we've done this living together, 0:11:55.568 --> 0:11:57.488 so we can sort of tick that off and now 0:11:57.488 --> 0:11:59.608 we can buy a house. And that's when we started 0:11:59.648 --> 0:12:02.688 looking for a house. That was like a really big decision. 0:12:02.768 --> 0:12:06.128 We also felt buying a house is a lot more 0:12:06.608 --> 0:12:09.488 serious than marriage at times, and so you know, big commitment. 0:12:09.488 --> 0:12:13.648 Any so, it was just confirmation of our relationship and 0:12:14.288 --> 0:12:17.728 that next step which felt super organic to us. And 0:12:17.768 --> 0:12:21.368 so that was the moment when I felt a bit 0:12:21.408 --> 0:12:24.448 more like an adult. I was twenty three when we 0:12:24.488 --> 0:12:28.448 bought our home, and yeah, that just felt so right 0:12:28.528 --> 0:12:30.968 for us. We put offers on one, we missed out 0:12:31.168 --> 0:12:34.208 due to you know, developers just offering cash that we 0:12:34.248 --> 0:12:37.648 could have never competed with, and then you know, we 0:12:37.768 --> 0:12:40.328 missed out on the second one. And then I was 0:12:40.328 --> 0:12:42.888 actually traveling for work, so I was in Fiji at 0:12:42.888 --> 0:12:46.488 the time, and Matt called me and he said, I 0:12:46.528 --> 0:12:50.128 found it. I found the one. I said, okay, well 0:12:50.128 --> 0:12:52.728 that's great, but I'm away so I can't see it. 0:12:52.888 --> 0:12:54.368 He said, yeah, yeah, I think we can wait. I 0:12:54.368 --> 0:12:55.568 think I can draw it out for a day. So 0:12:55.608 --> 0:12:58.848 I said okay, So arrived back. Matt picked me up 0:12:58.848 --> 0:13:00.888 from the airport. We drove past the house and he said, 0:13:01.248 --> 0:13:03.688 I've got to show you the house. So well, it's nighttime, 0:13:03.728 --> 0:13:06.088 I can't see anything, but sure, we'll drive past the house. 0:13:06.688 --> 0:13:09.568 And we pulled up in front of the house and 0:13:09.808 --> 0:13:15.128 he said, this is it. This is the one. And 0:13:15.168 --> 0:13:17.968 I looked at him and I got emotional, like I 0:13:18.008 --> 0:13:21.448 am now, and I said, this is our family home. 0:13:22.408 --> 0:13:24.528 And we just knew. I hadn't even been in it yet, 0:13:24.928 --> 0:13:27.248 we just knew it was the one. And so the 0:13:27.288 --> 0:13:30.088 next morning I had a quick inspection for all of 0:13:30.128 --> 0:13:32.528 ten minutes, and we put the offer in and we 0:13:32.608 --> 0:13:37.568 got it. I had these moments at multiple times in 0:13:37.608 --> 0:13:40.208 our relationship where I just would pinch myself and go, 0:13:41.248 --> 0:13:46.088 is this real? This relationship is so beautiful and so perfect, 0:13:46.248 --> 0:13:51.608 and everything's just falling into place so beautifully. So I 0:13:51.608 --> 0:13:55.728 would always feel so much gratitude that I got to 0:13:56.648 --> 0:13:59.968 have this love and be in this love. And then 0:14:00.008 --> 0:14:03.408 I also had the I guess, the awareness to also 0:14:04.488 --> 0:14:09.008 sit back and appreciate it and say, wow, not everyone 0:14:09.048 --> 0:14:14.048 gets this, How lucky am I to experience this? Living 0:14:14.048 --> 0:14:17.008 together felt exactly the same. It was so easy. We 0:14:17.088 --> 0:14:22.168 just moved in and it just felt right. It was 0:14:22.288 --> 0:14:25.088 just what was always meant to happen. And you know, 0:14:25.208 --> 0:14:28.008 even though it took a few years for us to 0:14:28.088 --> 0:14:30.888 do it, when we did move in, it was the 0:14:30.928 --> 0:14:34.368 perfect time and it felt like it was exactly how 0:14:34.408 --> 0:14:35.048 it was meant to be. 0:14:35.568 --> 0:14:38.168 So, dear listener, can you guess what happened next? 0:14:38.488 --> 0:14:41.768 Two years later, Matt took me back to the spot 0:14:41.808 --> 0:14:44.728 that we met for the first time. He had told 0:14:44.728 --> 0:14:47.248 me that we were actually having group dinner with some friends. 0:14:48.208 --> 0:14:51.568 So I told Matt, oh, I'm getting my nails done 0:14:51.608 --> 0:14:53.448 and so I'll just meet you at the restaurant later, 0:14:53.488 --> 0:14:55.208 and he said, yeah, yeah, perfect, I'll see you there. 0:14:56.288 --> 0:15:02.488 I arrived and I remember seeing him and it actually 0:15:02.528 --> 0:15:05.128 just recently had a shoulder injury, so he was meant 0:15:05.128 --> 0:15:07.488 to be wearing a sling and he didn't have it on. 0:15:08.688 --> 0:15:11.888 I thought, Oh, it's weird. And I arrived and I 0:15:11.928 --> 0:15:14.568 said to him, I said, where's your sling? Like you 0:15:14.608 --> 0:15:16.928 meant to be wearing that at all times. He said, 0:15:16.928 --> 0:15:20.808 it doesn't matter. Yeah, it kind of does, and then 0:15:20.888 --> 0:15:23.488 you know, I basically blinked and he was on one knee. 0:15:23.528 --> 0:15:27.808 And the most beautiful thing was that it was where 0:15:27.808 --> 0:15:31.488 we first met, basically within an inch. He made sure 0:15:31.528 --> 0:15:35.208 that we were in the exact same spot and nothing 0:15:35.248 --> 0:15:39.488 extravagant and absolutely perfect at the same time, because it 0:15:39.528 --> 0:15:44.248 was us. The wedding was so much fun to plan. 0:15:44.448 --> 0:15:47.328 We just really enjoyed it. We wanted one venue and 0:15:47.368 --> 0:15:50.048 we just wanted people to have fun, so it was 0:15:50.088 --> 0:15:53.928 really important to us that we keep it light. We 0:15:54.008 --> 0:15:56.848 deliberately planned the ceremony to be quite personal, and we 0:15:56.928 --> 0:16:00.048 shared a lot of stories, some of which our guests 0:16:00.128 --> 0:16:02.088 had never heard of before, so that was really nice 0:16:02.128 --> 0:16:05.208 to share those little surprises with them. But we deliberately 0:16:05.208 --> 0:16:09.088 had our ceremony very very personal and very intimate, which 0:16:09.168 --> 0:16:12.888 was lovely. And then we had a table tennis table 0:16:13.368 --> 0:16:16.688 at the reception and we just had it at a 0:16:16.728 --> 0:16:19.368 venue that also has mini golf. We're like, go and 0:16:19.448 --> 0:16:21.888 have fun like this is what our relationship is about, 0:16:21.928 --> 0:16:25.408 just spending time together. The most beautiful thing about getting 0:16:25.408 --> 0:16:28.808 married was absolutely nothing changed. I changed my last name 0:16:29.168 --> 0:16:31.528 and I got an extra ring on my finger, but 0:16:32.568 --> 0:16:35.568 that was it, you know, and that felt really beautiful 0:16:35.968 --> 0:16:40.368 to have that experience and to have this fairy tale 0:16:40.448 --> 0:16:45.728 love continue and to blossom once again. Cloud nine continued, 0:16:45.888 --> 0:16:49.448 The fairy tale continued, and this really felt like just 0:16:49.608 --> 0:16:53.168 the evolution of the fairy tale. It was just how 0:16:53.168 --> 0:16:55.648 the book was meant to be written. Nothing was really 0:16:55.768 --> 0:17:00.648 changing in our relationship except we were just probably getting 0:17:01.328 --> 0:17:04.848 more and more joy. We pretty much spent every moment 0:17:04.968 --> 0:17:08.808 together and completely by choice. Matt would also then drop 0:17:08.848 --> 0:17:10.368 me to work, so he would drive me to work, 0:17:10.407 --> 0:17:13.088 so we would have that commute together. Both of us 0:17:13.128 --> 0:17:15.328 had work trips, but usually only a few days at 0:17:15.328 --> 0:17:17.128 a time. I think the most we were probably apart 0:17:17.128 --> 0:17:20.167 was maybe two weeks. You know. Matt still continued his 0:17:20.208 --> 0:17:21.608 cricket so there was a lot of time that he 0:17:21.648 --> 0:17:24.927 would you have that time with his cricket club or 0:17:25.008 --> 0:17:27.208 working or hanging out with his mates and things like that. 0:17:27.288 --> 0:17:31.088 Absolutely and vice versa. But the majority of our time 0:17:31.208 --> 0:17:35.888 was together. Because we met so young, I built my 0:17:35.968 --> 0:17:38.128 adult life with Matt. He was a few years older, 0:17:38.168 --> 0:17:42.048 so he'd had a few years out in adulthood before 0:17:42.088 --> 0:17:45.088 we met, but ultimately we were so young, so we 0:17:45.168 --> 0:17:49.888 built our adult life together. So I didn't know anything 0:17:50.248 --> 0:17:54.608 any different to being an adult with Matt. I didn't 0:17:54.648 --> 0:17:58.888 know any different to being an adult in a relationship, 0:17:59.208 --> 0:18:03.088 to being a girlfriend and then a wife. That was 0:18:03.288 --> 0:18:08.088 just part of our life. I always felt very grateful. 0:18:08.488 --> 0:18:10.967 I think we really balanced each other out in that 0:18:11.088 --> 0:18:14.128 as well. Particularly in a work sense. It was due 0:18:14.168 --> 0:18:15.768 to the job I was doing. It was easy to 0:18:15.768 --> 0:18:18.368 get overwhelmed, and Matt would just balance it out and say, oh, 0:18:18.368 --> 0:18:20.328 it's actually not stressful. I'm like, oh, yeah, you're right, 0:18:20.728 --> 0:18:23.288 and vice versa. Sometimes, you know, Matt would need He 0:18:23.328 --> 0:18:26.728 would often send me some spreadsheets that needed formatting because 0:18:27.008 --> 0:18:28.528 I don't know how to do this. So we just 0:18:28.568 --> 0:18:32.328 had this really beautiful balance of knowing what our strengths 0:18:32.328 --> 0:18:36.008 are and how we could balance each other. I was 0:18:36.008 --> 0:18:38.967 a dreamer and I loved to think about what our 0:18:39.008 --> 0:18:41.448 future might look like, and I'd ask matter question, even 0:18:41.488 --> 0:18:45.208 it was something really trivial, and he would say, i'll 0:18:45.208 --> 0:18:48.088 talk to you before then, and it was this beautiful 0:18:48.128 --> 0:18:51.648 reassurance of like, don't get ahead of yourself, be present, 0:18:52.608 --> 0:18:55.848 I'll talk to you. Before then we never had that 0:18:56.088 --> 0:19:01.968 time of bickering or an argument. We didn't even raise 0:19:02.048 --> 0:19:05.328 voices like that was just not part of our relationship. 0:19:05.488 --> 0:19:09.608 And you know, often friends would confide in us or say, oh, 0:19:09.608 --> 0:19:12.008 this is going on for us, or we're struggling. And 0:19:12.048 --> 0:19:17.208 I found that really difficult because I would often respond 0:19:17.288 --> 0:19:20.608 and saying, oh, that sounds really hard. I was trying 0:19:20.648 --> 0:19:22.968 to be empathetic and trying to understand, but I actually 0:19:23.008 --> 0:19:27.167 had no idea. The only part of doubt that I 0:19:27.248 --> 0:19:30.208 ever had was this is too good to be true. 0:19:31.248 --> 0:19:35.488 How can you have something so perfect? How can everything 0:19:35.728 --> 0:19:39.528 be so easy? And then I felt such gratitude because 0:19:39.688 --> 0:19:42.128 here I am living it, so I know it's real. 0:19:43.208 --> 0:19:46.008 So here they were at twenty six. In twenty nine, 0:19:46.328 --> 0:19:49.248 Matt and Ash were married, living in their dream home, 0:19:49.368 --> 0:19:53.687 and just blissfully happy. Once again, the next step seemed inevitable. 0:19:54.008 --> 0:19:58.048 We wanted kids, We wanted to have kids present, We 0:19:58.088 --> 0:20:00.448 wanted to play games in the backyard, we wanted to 0:20:00.488 --> 0:20:03.967 watch them play sport, and that was it, you know, 0:20:04.048 --> 0:20:06.208 we then dreamed of you know, in the future. All 0:20:06.248 --> 0:20:09.368 we really said was we'd love to be married for 0:20:09.368 --> 0:20:12.288 a few year, let's enjoy married life, and then we'll 0:20:12.648 --> 0:20:16.168 think about our family. So that was as much planning 0:20:16.328 --> 0:20:19.407 and time frame that we put on, and then twenty 0:20:19.448 --> 0:20:23.688 twenty happened. In January, I lost my father in law, 0:20:24.328 --> 0:20:26.768 who I adored, and he had a very short and 0:20:26.808 --> 0:20:30.328 aggressive illness. In March, I was stood down from my 0:20:30.408 --> 0:20:34.368 job and I worked in travel, and so the industry 0:20:34.488 --> 0:20:37.608 was just decimated. So I stood down from a role 0:20:37.648 --> 0:20:39.848 that I really loved in a company that I loved. 0:20:40.808 --> 0:20:43.888 But it was in June that Matt and I found 0:20:43.888 --> 0:20:47.648 out that we were pregnant. We were so excited. We'd 0:20:47.688 --> 0:20:49.648 been trying for a little while. We really knew that 0:20:49.688 --> 0:20:51.688 we'd been married for a few years. We felt really 0:20:51.728 --> 0:20:55.088 great in terms of, you know, we've enjoyed a few 0:20:55.168 --> 0:20:57.447 years of married life. This feels like the next step. 0:20:57.648 --> 0:21:02.648 So we'd been trying, and yeah, to then find out 0:21:02.648 --> 0:21:06.128 pregnant was just amazing. We just had a private moment 0:21:06.128 --> 0:21:09.168 at home and found out together. I was six weeks 0:21:09.208 --> 0:21:11.488 pregnant at the time, so I needed an early scan 0:21:11.888 --> 0:21:17.687 and I remember the doctor saying there's three and that 0:21:17.808 --> 0:21:20.088 was it. It was just this really short sentence, and 0:21:20.168 --> 0:21:22.808 so Matt and I looked at each other and I 0:21:22.848 --> 0:21:30.288 said three what and he said three babies. The room 0:21:30.368 --> 0:21:34.008 just went quiet, and he said, let's go and have 0:21:34.048 --> 0:21:38.328 a chat, and the tone completely changed. So Matt and 0:21:38.368 --> 0:21:41.608 I had walked into this appointment feeling completely elated and 0:21:41.688 --> 0:21:48.248 just beyond excited to now feeling really confused. And it 0:21:48.328 --> 0:21:50.728 was at that point that the doctor explained to ask 0:21:50.808 --> 0:21:56.528 how high risk the pregnancy was, and the doctor said, 0:21:57.848 --> 0:22:00.848 it is highly unlikely that you will meet all three babies, 0:22:02.208 --> 0:22:03.968 so you need to go home and have a think 0:22:04.008 --> 0:22:08.167 about this. Walking into an appointment feeling so much joy 0:22:08.328 --> 0:22:10.848 and then walking out of an appointment to feel so 0:22:11.088 --> 0:22:16.128 deflated was something I'd never experienced. For all of these years, 0:22:16.168 --> 0:22:18.648 I'd lived this fairy tale and everything was fabulous, and 0:22:18.648 --> 0:22:22.728 that was the moment that really crushed me. And I 0:22:22.768 --> 0:22:24.848 remember sitting back in the car with Matt and we 0:22:24.888 --> 0:22:28.568 just looked at each other and I said, what just happened? 0:22:30.088 --> 0:22:32.608 And we were both in this state of shock, and 0:22:32.648 --> 0:22:36.927 he replied, I've got no idea. And we just had 0:22:36.968 --> 0:22:39.288 been given a bundle of paperwork to read through, and 0:22:39.448 --> 0:22:43.008 I just was like, I don't understand. And before he 0:22:43.088 --> 0:22:46.288 started the car to drive off, I looked at him 0:22:46.328 --> 0:22:51.288 and I said, we will meet three babies. There's no 0:22:51.368 --> 0:22:54.768 decision to be made. And he grabbed my hand. He said, 0:22:55.768 --> 0:23:00.128 there's no decision. We're pregnant and they're going to be okay. 0:23:01.688 --> 0:23:05.368 And then we drove off, knowing we're pregnant with triplets, 0:23:05.968 --> 0:23:08.568 and we said to each other that we really wanted 0:23:08.568 --> 0:23:11.768 to allow ourselves to feel the shock. So we went 0:23:11.848 --> 0:23:15.687 home and we said, let's just sit in this emotion 0:23:15.768 --> 0:23:20.727 for a bit and have that processing time. And then 0:23:20.728 --> 0:23:25.328