WEBVTT - Never Look At At Married Man's Google Search 0:00:08.234 --> 0:00:10.914 You're listening to I'm im a mea podcast. 0:00:19.874 --> 0:00:23.753 Hello, and welcome to Unleash, the podcast for gen X 0:00:23.794 --> 0:00:27.034 women who need a laugh. Now, if you take songs 0:00:27.034 --> 0:00:30.354 off the radio, crimped your hair, and remember Scott and 0:00:30.474 --> 0:00:35.833 Charlene's wedding like it was yesterday, you're in the right place. Okay, 0:00:35.994 --> 0:00:37.833 So who have we got on the sofa this week? 0:00:37.914 --> 0:00:38.074 Hi? 0:00:38.114 --> 0:00:39.874 I'm Mary Kustas, I'm an actress writer. 0:00:40.193 --> 0:00:42.553 Hi, I'm Sally Hitworth and I'm an author. 0:00:42.994 --> 0:00:46.314 I'm brunapep Andrea, I'm a film and TV producer. 0:00:46.153 --> 0:00:47.994 And I'm Cas Mahoney I'm a comedian. 0:00:48.634 --> 0:00:52.793 So wherever you are, unclinch you jaw, clinch your pelvic 0:00:52.833 --> 0:00:55.874 floor and get ready to unleash. 0:00:55.954 --> 0:00:56.474 Yeah. 0:00:56.514 --> 0:00:59.834 Who Okay, who's starting us off today? Okay? 0:00:59.914 --> 0:01:02.474 I just want to jump in because I wasn't here 0:01:03.074 --> 0:01:06.314 last week, but I did manage to have a little 0:01:06.394 --> 0:01:11.394 listen and I heard your story, Brunner, about how you 0:01:11.474 --> 0:01:13.634 had escaped from a health retreat. 0:01:13.954 --> 0:01:16.114 Yes, any health retreats. 0:01:16.394 --> 0:01:18.114 Well, I don't know if I was the only one 0:01:18.114 --> 0:01:22.074 to be completely up in arms about this, and I 0:01:22.314 --> 0:01:25.834 actually being the researcher that I am, I decided to 0:01:25.874 --> 0:01:29.234 do a little bit of sluthing and find out how 0:01:29.354 --> 0:01:33.034 common this is. And I actually found a place and 0:01:33.194 --> 0:01:35.514 a person that I could speak to. I'm not going 0:01:35.594 --> 0:01:38.914 to reveal their name or where they're from, but here's 0:01:38.914 --> 0:01:39.554 what I found out. 0:01:40.514 --> 0:01:46.074 I know Your Wellness Retreat is incredibly exclusive. I was wondering, 0:01:46.234 --> 0:01:50.754 how often do you get runners, like people who check 0:01:50.794 --> 0:01:54.114 in and see the itinerary and think I'd rather be 0:01:54.154 --> 0:01:56.594 at Westfield and they just hotfoot it out of there. 0:01:56.954 --> 0:02:04.594 Oh no, I guess don't run. The clientele that we 0:02:04.634 --> 0:02:08.274 do have here. It's a I guess I sort of deeply, 0:02:09.194 --> 0:02:14.074 profoundly intentional about their wellness journey. So they've invested both 0:02:14.114 --> 0:02:21.034 spiritually and financially, simply not an environment that what do 0:02:21.034 --> 0:02:23.394 you say they run from yourself? 0:02:23.474 --> 0:02:26.354 I wouldn't say no, Yeah, no, I mean I get it, 0:02:26.394 --> 0:02:27.034 that makes sense. 0:02:27.514 --> 0:02:31.954 It's an experience of relaxation. So our guests they do 0:02:31.994 --> 0:02:33.794 always stay. We have quite a weight list. Actually, have 0:02:33.834 --> 0:02:34.874 you been to our website? 0:02:35.034 --> 0:02:38.434 Yeah? I have, And look, I would never do anything 0:02:38.514 --> 0:02:41.274 like that, but I do have a friend who she 0:02:41.394 --> 0:02:46.354 actually had booked herself in Not Your Retreat, and she 0:02:46.514 --> 0:02:49.994 then ended up dating a prison break after twenty four hours. 0:02:50.034 --> 0:02:51.234 You didn't even unpack her back. 0:02:51.634 --> 0:02:54.474 I would say that's wildly uncommon. The one time I 0:02:54.514 --> 0:02:57.674 can assure you that we've never had a guest want 0:02:57.714 --> 0:03:01.034 to leave, nor have they left, especially after twenty four hours. 0:03:01.034 --> 0:03:03.954 I mean, frankly, so this type of exclusive retreat, I'd say, 0:03:03.954 --> 0:03:04.594 that's unheard of. 0:03:07.194 --> 0:03:11.394 Oh my god, a pioneer, unheard of, Bruna. 0:03:11.514 --> 0:03:16.514 So I am thinking for the future, either A, don't 0:03:16.514 --> 0:03:20.274 book yourself into this kind of retreat, or B take 0:03:20.354 --> 0:03:22.274 me and I will be the prison warden and I 0:03:22.274 --> 0:03:23.594 will make sure that you stay. 0:03:23.594 --> 0:03:25.354 And I can tag team in the car park. 0:03:25.594 --> 0:03:29.674 We do break and get away care unleashed goes retreat No, 0:03:29.954 --> 0:03:30.434 and you know. 0:03:30.514 --> 0:03:33.234 Can I just defend myself for a second contract. 0:03:33.314 --> 0:03:34.274 But it is unheard off? 0:03:34.394 --> 0:03:37.794 Lovely that number one, she's she's a lying beep. 0:03:38.234 --> 0:03:38.754 She's lying. 0:03:38.794 --> 0:03:41.554 She's lying one hundred percent. I'm not the only one. 0:03:41.634 --> 0:03:45.314 And to my credit, I have publicly said I will 0:03:45.434 --> 0:03:49.194 go again with you guys or a bunch of girlfriends. 0:03:49.194 --> 0:03:51.714 I just don't want to fly solo. And she's lying. 0:03:51.834 --> 0:03:53.914 She's heard of a lying one I heard of. 0:03:54.154 --> 0:03:56.714 I did see Bruna like lose blood from her face. 0:03:56.754 --> 0:03:59.674 When she mentioned this, this is a spiritual and I 0:03:59.754 --> 0:04:01.794 just said that exactly. That's where you lost, Bruna. 0:04:02.034 --> 0:04:04.034 Whereas I want a number yeah. 0:04:03.874 --> 0:04:09.274 Yeah, Unleashed retreat coming soon, guys. 0:04:09.714 --> 0:04:14.114 Speaking of wellness and health retreats. I've got some thoughts 0:04:15.274 --> 0:04:18.674 about book club. Okay, I'm sure many of you are 0:04:18.674 --> 0:04:21.914 members of book clubs. I'm not because I say fuck 0:04:21.993 --> 0:04:27.074 book club. I want boxing club. I want fight club. 0:04:26.914 --> 0:04:30.593 Fight club like proper fighting, or we got gloves on? 0:04:30.714 --> 0:04:31.714 Or is this just like with. 0:04:33.594 --> 0:04:37.234 Okay, please let me explain. Okay, So as some of 0:04:37.274 --> 0:04:39.753 you may or may not know, many of our listeners, 0:04:39.794 --> 0:04:41.073 I'm sure feel the same thing. 0:04:41.794 --> 0:04:42.794 I go on and off? 0:04:42.914 --> 0:04:46.194 How should I put an exercise and physical health? 0:04:46.433 --> 0:04:46.873 Okay? 0:04:47.113 --> 0:04:50.433 And when I say on and off, mostly off? Yeah okay. 0:04:50.513 --> 0:04:54.873 So like I will be devout with a trend or 0:04:54.914 --> 0:04:57.393 something or fitness, I'll be like not once a week, 0:04:57.433 --> 0:05:00.274 I'm like six seven times a week and then cut 0:05:00.313 --> 0:05:04.113 to two years later, or I've done nothing. Maybe I 0:05:04.193 --> 0:05:08.074 popped on the treadmill for a quick thirty like okay, Bruna, 0:05:08.113 --> 0:05:12.274 it's time. So I had this revelation recently. I was 0:05:12.474 --> 0:05:14.594 for a minute there, I was going to a place 0:05:14.633 --> 0:05:16.954 down the road, and I was they had boxing and 0:05:17.034 --> 0:05:19.793 CrossFit together, so a bit of pilates, a bit of cores, 0:05:19.834 --> 0:05:21.873 a bit of weights and you know, as we know, 0:05:22.073 --> 0:05:24.713 particularly over fifty, we need the weight training. 0:05:24.873 --> 0:05:24.993 Right. 0:05:25.674 --> 0:05:29.234 So recently I was like, I need some inspiration, a 0:05:29.234 --> 0:05:31.193 bit like book club. I need a bunch of girls. 0:05:31.234 --> 0:05:33.954 I've never really been a group fitness person. So I 0:05:34.034 --> 0:05:36.033 rallied the women that work with me, and I was like, 0:05:36.073 --> 0:05:38.474 full no, I rallied. 0:05:38.113 --> 0:05:38.553 That I did. 0:05:38.633 --> 0:05:43.153 I did pay. I I did offer to pay. I said, 0:05:43.193 --> 0:05:44.993 I will offer to pay for yours and they accept 0:05:45.674 --> 0:05:49.394 ten or eleven classes. They did accept, and seven in 0:05:49.433 --> 0:05:52.154 the morning we went down to the boxing class. And 0:05:52.313 --> 0:05:54.914 as soon as I did it, I remembered what I 0:05:54.953 --> 0:05:58.313 loved about it, because weirdly, I am quite fit for 0:05:58.433 --> 0:06:02.033 someone who has not maintained their fitness. But what I 0:06:02.073 --> 0:06:03.714 love about it, what I love it. I used to 0:06:03.714 --> 0:06:06.113 go to Soul Cycle in America. I like the dark space, 0:06:06.154 --> 0:06:08.993 I like the loud new ze, I like Clubby. Like 0:06:09.034 --> 0:06:11.113 I'm not I'm certainly not going to stop at that 0:06:11.113 --> 0:06:15.833 Bond Bay outdoor gym and push weights, right, but in 0:06:15.914 --> 0:06:18.393 the kind of privacy of a dark room and it's 0:06:18.393 --> 0:06:22.474 pumping music with a bunch of friends. I felt unbelievable. 0:06:22.674 --> 0:06:26.593 Oh guys, here's a fun fact. Nothing's more emotionally satisfying 0:06:26.953 --> 0:06:30.754 than boxing. Because whoever you're mad at, whatever you're frustrated 0:06:30.753 --> 0:06:33.753 about that day, to really let loose on that bag, 0:06:34.234 --> 0:06:37.354 it's pretty amazing. So I would like you to propose 0:06:37.474 --> 0:06:39.794 an unleashed boxing day. I'd like you to come with me. 0:06:39.873 --> 0:06:44.194 I'd be totally up for that. Absolutely. I love boxing totally. Okay, 0:06:45.113 --> 0:06:46.914 it's like the morning nightclub, you know. 0:06:46.953 --> 0:06:48.673 I want to be in a dark space with pumping 0:06:48.753 --> 0:06:50.914 dance music firsting in the morning, caffemated. 0:06:51.594 --> 0:06:53.433 Hell yeah, yeah, that's like clubbing. 0:06:53.674 --> 0:06:55.234 The problem for me is I'm a little bit you know, 0:06:55.274 --> 0:06:57.674 I become upsets. So it's not once and once it's 0:06:57.714 --> 0:06:59.474 not enough. So I'm like five six times a week. 0:06:59.474 --> 0:07:01.634 I've got my own gloves, I've got my own raps, 0:07:01.953 --> 0:07:04.393 I've got my own wraps. Them here today, like the 0:07:04.433 --> 0:07:05.873 actual wraps the boxes wear. 0:07:05.953 --> 0:07:08.034 Wait, how many classes have you done. 0:07:08.113 --> 0:07:11.234 In the last four weeks. I've done about twenty five classes. 0:07:11.274 --> 0:07:14.314 Oh wow, Yeah, yeah, that's InCred Yeah yeah. Do you 0:07:14.354 --> 0:07:16.114 pretend that you're rocky when you're doing it. 0:07:20.714 --> 0:07:21.394 Going up the. 0:07:21.274 --> 0:07:24.794 Stairs, Mary, That's a great question. I do. And like 0:07:24.914 --> 0:07:27.634 yesterday I was like bouncing around like I was rocky. 0:07:27.674 --> 0:07:30.273 Like I'm bouncing around on my feet like light footed, 0:07:30.314 --> 0:07:31.754 and I'm like, who am I rocky? 0:07:31.953 --> 0:07:34.834 So are you punching into like a bag or pads 0:07:34.834 --> 0:07:35.634 on someone's hands? 0:07:35.714 --> 0:07:35.914 Yeah? 0:07:35.994 --> 0:07:38.194 No, total full boxing bag And. 0:07:38.114 --> 0:07:40.314 Who is the face on that bag? In your mind? 0:07:40.594 --> 0:07:44.314 Great question, Cath. It changes every day. So when I 0:07:44.393 --> 0:07:47.514 first started, i'd had a business deal go south a 0:07:47.514 --> 0:07:50.194 few years ago, and I'm still, how shall I say it, 0:07:50.274 --> 0:07:53.154 carrying a lot of anger towards the person that dismantled it. 0:07:53.794 --> 0:07:56.954 Someone really sabotaged, They sabotaged on a deal, and I 0:07:57.034 --> 0:07:59.473 do often imagine her face. I'm not gonna lie. I 0:07:59.514 --> 0:08:02.194 do when I'm punching, but it changes. It is kind 0:08:02.194 --> 0:08:04.074 of who I'm frustrated at at the time. 0:08:04.234 --> 0:08:06.674 I'm not gonna lie. I don't exercise yeah at all, 0:08:07.234 --> 0:08:10.194 and if I do, I'm very much a yoga person. 0:08:10.274 --> 0:08:13.354 Something where I can be lying down is ideal. And 0:08:13.674 --> 0:08:16.714 while I'm really happy for you that you found your 0:08:16.754 --> 0:08:19.273 box hit, I'm hopeful that you're not going to become 0:08:19.354 --> 0:08:22.674 one of those exercise enthusiasts I am. 0:08:23.074 --> 0:08:25.273 I am going to become I have I've become that person. 0:08:25.554 --> 0:08:28.554 And I going to say just to say, Mary is 0:08:28.594 --> 0:08:31.273 a bit like you, Like she walks or I'm going 0:08:31.314 --> 0:08:32.473 to walk around the park. 0:08:33.314 --> 0:08:34.234 And I do a lot of that. 0:08:34.634 --> 0:08:37.434 I get it, but like that's just not enough as 0:08:37.434 --> 0:08:40.114 you get older, it's not enough. So I might hate 0:08:40.154 --> 0:08:47.034 you both because like, how do you you know, stay taught? 0:08:46.514 --> 0:08:48.114 You're all taught you. 0:08:50.234 --> 0:08:50.714 To do it. 0:08:50.754 --> 0:08:53.314 And I got to say maybe, I mean, maybe I'm 0:08:53.354 --> 0:08:56.194 an optimist and idealist, but look, I just don't think 0:08:56.234 --> 0:08:58.074 it's too late. I want to look like Jal and 0:08:58.114 --> 0:08:58.874 I think I still can. 0:08:59.234 --> 0:09:00.274 We all can't believe that. 0:09:00.594 --> 0:09:01.194 I believe it. 0:09:01.274 --> 0:09:01.994 I believe it. 0:09:02.994 --> 0:09:03.514 Let's do it. 0:09:03.554 --> 0:09:04.674 Let's make a commandment together. 0:09:04.754 --> 0:09:05.194 Let's go. 0:09:07.474 --> 0:09:09.194 I'm just going to say that I'm happy that you 0:09:09.194 --> 0:09:10.434 live in Sydney and I live in. 0:09:10.994 --> 0:09:13.874 Thank you, Sally. I'll be cheering you on from home 0:09:13.914 --> 0:09:20.834 from bed horizontally. Okay, question, We're always on our phones, 0:09:20.874 --> 0:09:23.474 We're always looking for answers in life in general. I 0:09:23.474 --> 0:09:26.754 think that's a big part of, you know, keeping curiosity alive. 0:09:27.314 --> 0:09:29.833 Just as a curious question, what was the last thing 0:09:29.834 --> 0:09:33.634 you googled. Oh, okay, have a look. 0:09:34.354 --> 0:09:37.394 I googled for hints for word all this morning. 0:09:37.474 --> 0:09:39.754 Right, sense? 0:09:40.754 --> 0:09:41.434 Is it cheating? 0:09:41.834 --> 0:09:45.234 Will I play with my dad and my daughter? And 0:09:45.274 --> 0:09:47.314 my dad is really competitive and he always gets it 0:09:47.354 --> 0:09:49.634 in three goes and it really annoys me. So I 0:09:49.714 --> 0:09:51.274 was just going to see if I could find out. 0:09:51.394 --> 0:09:52.114 So you're cheating? 0:09:52.434 --> 0:09:55.514 Well, I think it's allowed, isn't it. 0:09:55.594 --> 0:09:56.154 No, it's not. 0:09:56.274 --> 0:09:59.794 It's cheating. Fine, does your dad know that? 0:09:59.834 --> 0:10:01.634 You but you can? 0:10:07.354 --> 0:10:08.194 What is it exactly? 0:10:08.474 --> 0:10:08.674 Oh? 0:10:08.714 --> 0:10:13.674 My god, wheel of fortune, fortune, wheel afford. 0:10:13.874 --> 0:10:18.194 I'm just asking Adriana Exea Mary Coustas. 0:10:18.234 --> 0:10:20.314 Here is what I googled, Because you know how I 0:10:20.354 --> 0:10:21.994 see things in like license plates. 0:10:22.114 --> 0:10:23.794 I have like messages from the universe. 0:10:24.074 --> 0:10:26.554 I saw two to two this morning, so I wanted 0:10:26.594 --> 0:10:28.714 to know two to two angel meaning. 0:10:28.874 --> 0:10:30.114 Yes is very on brown for you. 0:10:30.114 --> 0:10:31.234 Do we know what the answer was? 0:10:31.394 --> 0:10:31.714 Okay? 0:10:31.914 --> 0:10:34.674 Seeing two two two is a gentle, reassuring message from 0:10:34.714 --> 0:10:38.114 the universe to trust the process and find your equilibrium. 0:10:38.354 --> 0:10:41.074 It's about duality, partnership, and harmony. 0:10:41.554 --> 0:10:42.914 Will I say that about everything? 0:10:43.034 --> 0:10:43.314 Oh? 0:10:43.314 --> 0:10:45.394 Thanks, sal I'm sure that's what they say about the 0:10:45.394 --> 0:10:46.474 sevens and the ones. 0:10:46.674 --> 0:10:51.354 Yeah, the threes are different. Don't shoot me down, Bruno. 0:10:51.394 --> 0:10:55.473 What Samuel's My Google often is taken up by googling 0:10:56.154 --> 0:10:59.114 TV shows and who's in them. So I'm a little 0:10:59.154 --> 0:11:01.994 bit obsessed with off campus right now. So the last 0:11:02.034 --> 0:11:05.234 thing I googled was the off Campus cast because I'm like, 0:11:05.314 --> 0:11:07.554 where did these kids come from? I mean most of 0:11:07.594 --> 0:11:10.154 them are kids, They're about twenty seven, twenty eight, and 0:11:10.154 --> 0:11:12.234 then I like to know what they've done if I 0:11:12.434 --> 0:11:14.474 like them, and the Australian kid who's in it, I 0:11:14.514 --> 0:11:16.634 was like, I need to know everything. So if I 0:11:16.674 --> 0:11:19.154 watch a show, I tend to do a deep dive 0:11:19.514 --> 0:11:22.714 of like everyone involved. And that show is like one 0:11:22.714 --> 0:11:25.394 of the you cannot even believe how successful that show is, 0:11:26.994 --> 0:11:31.114 bigger than Summer Return Pretty. It's insane and unfortunately I 0:11:31.154 --> 0:11:33.594 was forced to watch it twice with my daughter. Did 0:11:33.674 --> 0:11:35.914 you mind as I covered her thirteen year old eyes? 0:11:36.314 --> 0:11:36.434 Oh? 0:11:36.434 --> 0:11:36.754 I did? 0:11:36.754 --> 0:11:39.354 You can't not like it. It's like this generation's Felicity. 0:11:39.914 --> 0:11:43.434 You know, we had Felicity and they have off Campus Amazing. 0:11:43.754 --> 0:11:45.434 I love, I love, I love knowing what the young 0:11:45.434 --> 0:11:47.354 people are watching. So that's what I googled. 0:11:47.474 --> 0:11:49.554 So were you googling it because you were thinking about 0:11:49.794 --> 0:11:52.234 casting them in something for you or yeah. 0:11:52.034 --> 0:11:54.674 If I like someone or if I see a new face, 0:11:55.034 --> 0:11:56.674 I'm always like, oh, that could be interesting. 0:11:56.754 --> 0:11:56.874 You know. 0:11:56.874 --> 0:11:58.714 I'm always doing a lot of things at once. So yeah, 0:11:58.714 --> 0:12:00.714 there's always a slight thing in the back of my 0:12:00.794 --> 0:12:04.514 mind and I always want to cast people my daughter likes, well, 0:12:04.554 --> 0:12:10.314 that's good, become cool exactly. Yeah. My whole goal is like, 0:12:10.354 --> 0:12:12.474 how do I put Sabrina Carpenter in something in life? 0:12:12.514 --> 0:12:14.874 That's my entire goal with my business. 0:12:14.914 --> 0:12:17.514 You've said it to the universe, to. 0:12:19.474 --> 0:12:20.114 You you you. 0:12:20.194 --> 0:12:21.394 Thanks ladies, thank you. 0:12:22.474 --> 0:12:25.314 I've got to confess something. Yeah, I google. I do 0:12:25.394 --> 0:12:28.834 exactly that, Bruna. I always if I discover someone that 0:12:28.994 --> 0:12:30.994 I've never seen before on screen, I want to know 0:12:31.074 --> 0:12:34.274 everything about them that I do too. But what I 0:12:34.314 --> 0:12:38.234 did discover, which I did not know, was I accidentally 0:12:38.714 --> 0:12:43.234 was witnessed to someone I knew when they were looking 0:12:43.274 --> 0:12:46.874 at their iPad and I accidentally saw the last thing 0:12:47.234 --> 0:12:55.514 that they'd go. This was someone married, et cetera. And 0:12:55.714 --> 0:12:58.154 I saw they were trying to show me something and 0:12:58.194 --> 0:13:01.034 they had to go. They accidentally went back instead of forward, 0:13:01.074 --> 0:13:06.754 and I saw erotic gay porn. 0:13:07.594 --> 0:13:08.474 I love that stuff. 0:13:08.594 --> 0:13:11.394 No, that was a man anyway. I don't want to 0:13:11.434 --> 0:13:18.954 say more than my husband. No hilarious, yeah, George, no anyway. 0:13:18.994 --> 0:13:22.154 But I suspect it anyway, and it was I suspected 0:13:22.234 --> 0:13:25.754 years earlier and it was confirmed. Okay, So sometimes you've 0:13:25.754 --> 0:13:28.154 got to be really careful. I think when you're looking 0:13:28.154 --> 0:13:30.434 over somebody's shoulder. I wasn't doing it like in a 0:13:30.474 --> 0:13:32.794 pervy way. They were just trying to show me something. 0:13:32.834 --> 0:13:35.194 And then they showed me more. But I pretended like 0:13:35.234 --> 0:13:37.713 I didn't see it, and they think I didn't see it. 0:13:37.794 --> 0:13:39.874 Oh, you have to pretend. 0:13:40.754 --> 0:13:42.394 And I know that they don't listen to this. 0:13:42.874 --> 0:13:45.474 It is George hilarious. 0:13:57.794 --> 0:14:00.594 Hey, ladies, I've been thinking about this. It was my 0:14:00.714 --> 0:14:01.754 birthday recently. 0:14:02.114 --> 0:14:06.834 Sally haveworth happy happy birthday. Still young the youngest years 0:14:07.194 --> 0:14:08.194 and we know we know. 0:14:08.194 --> 0:14:10.554 You're younger, Sally will always be the youngest on this podcast. 0:14:10.754 --> 0:14:16.833 Quite wow. Thanks sal. 0:14:17.114 --> 0:14:20.874 But I wrote something on Facebook and Instagram and the 0:14:20.954 --> 0:14:25.794 response really surprised me because it was so enormous. It 0:14:25.914 --> 0:14:29.914 was about how at forty six I am happy and 0:14:29.994 --> 0:14:32.714 how I wish I could turn back the clock to 0:14:32.874 --> 0:14:35.514 when I was forty three and my marriage was falling apart, 0:14:35.674 --> 0:14:39.834 and you know, the future looked incredibly bleak, and I 0:14:39.874 --> 0:14:42.514 wish I could go back and tell them that this 0:14:42.674 --> 0:14:44.594 was what life was going to be like. And the 0:14:44.674 --> 0:14:48.074 things that I talked about as being really special on 0:14:48.154 --> 0:14:50.354 that day were that I had woken up in the 0:14:50.394 --> 0:14:54.114 morning and played wordle with Clementine, which is our morning tradition. 0:14:54.594 --> 0:14:58.034 She's really good at it. And then if we can't 0:14:58.074 --> 0:15:00.554 get it right, we usually ring my mum and dad 0:15:00.594 --> 0:15:01.874 and they will feel. 0:15:01.594 --> 0:15:03.234 It, and they've already done it. 0:15:04.434 --> 0:15:09.074 Often we've cheated, obviously, siRNA has just pointed out. And 0:15:09.514 --> 0:15:12.034 I then had plans to go out for dinner with 0:15:12.074 --> 0:15:14.274 my new partner and his son and my kids, and 0:15:14.274 --> 0:15:16.754 they all get along so well, and we've got this 0:15:16.794 --> 0:15:19.954 tradition that they have to make the world's crappest card, 0:15:20.034 --> 0:15:21.634 and I go around and I read all the crap 0:15:21.674 --> 0:15:24.914 cards and we declare a winner. And so there are 0:15:24.914 --> 0:15:29.874 all these little kind of not particularly special things but 0:15:30.114 --> 0:15:32.994 such special things that kind of mark my birthday now, 0:15:33.154 --> 0:15:35.434 and how they are the real joys now that I 0:15:35.474 --> 0:15:39.074 never would have thought would be a joy three years ago. Yeah, 0:15:39.154 --> 0:15:42.234 the surprising thing to me is that it's not the 0:15:42.234 --> 0:15:44.954 big things that bring me the joy. It's not the 0:15:45.074 --> 0:15:47.514 getting on the New York Times bestseller list, or the 0:15:47.514 --> 0:15:51.754 film deals or the big moments in my life, although 0:15:51.754 --> 0:15:55.274 they are wonderful. The real joys are those little moments 0:15:55.274 --> 0:15:58.074 playing word with my daughter or going out for pizza, 0:15:58.154 --> 0:16:00.874 these fun traditions with the kids. And just got me 0:16:00.914 --> 0:16:04.834 thinking about tiny joys or glimmers as they're called, and 0:16:05.234 --> 0:16:09.914 the things that really make our life wonderful. Do you 0:16:09.954 --> 0:16:13.234 guys have little things like that, little traditions that you 0:16:14.154 --> 0:16:17.154 that you do the little joys of your lives or 0:16:17.194 --> 0:16:18.354 is it the bigger things. 0:16:18.314 --> 0:16:21.154 Now you spot on because you do think when I 0:16:21.194 --> 0:16:22.914 get the house, or when I get the husband, or 0:16:22.914 --> 0:16:24.634 when I get the deal, or when I get that car, 0:16:24.714 --> 0:16:27.714 when I lose three kilos, and they're not the things 0:16:27.754 --> 0:16:31.034 at all. I know that this is not up everyone's alley, 0:16:31.034 --> 0:16:33.154 but I do like a gratitude list every morning, only 0:16:33.234 --> 0:16:35.074 it's only like three or four things, Or send it 0:16:35.074 --> 0:16:37.754 to a friend overseas she sends me hers, and it's 0:16:37.794 --> 0:16:41.194 a really lovely way to like reset your morning because 0:16:41.194 --> 0:16:43.714 at the moment I'm very pary waking up at three 0:16:43.714 --> 0:16:45.634 in the morning like this morning, worried about all of 0:16:45.674 --> 0:16:46.594 the rubbish in the world. 0:16:46.594 --> 0:16:48.354 Where does it go? Where does it go? 0:16:48.714 --> 0:16:51.634 Never worried about that before, and so I need that 0:16:51.714 --> 0:16:54.714 reset in the morning to do that. But some of 0:16:54.794 --> 0:16:58.114 the little things that bring me joy are my parents 0:16:58.154 --> 0:16:59.594 live on the other side of the world, and you 0:16:59.634 --> 0:17:01.794 know they're late seventies now, Anna Pete. 0:17:02.954 --> 0:17:04.354 Making them laugh, like. 0:17:04.314 --> 0:17:07.553 We speak pretty much every day, and to make my 0:17:07.634 --> 0:17:10.793 mum and dad laugh just brings me so much joy. 0:17:11.394 --> 0:17:13.553 And also this sounds really daggy, but I think it's 0:17:13.594 --> 0:17:17.914 quite gen x. Putting on songs I love, and workshopping 0:17:17.914 --> 0:17:21.874 outfits and dancing in front of the mirror alone, like 0:17:21.994 --> 0:17:23.274 getting a banger on. 0:17:23.154 --> 0:17:26.034 And then going, oh my god, I never thought about. 0:17:25.754 --> 0:17:28.994 This dress with those shoes and the scuff and like, 0:17:29.074 --> 0:17:30.474 it's just pure joy. 0:17:30.714 --> 0:17:33.154 I am single currently. 0:17:33.394 --> 0:17:39.954 Apparently apparently between husbands. I mean, it's so funny that 0:17:40.034 --> 0:17:42.394 you talked about this, and I did read your piece 0:17:42.474 --> 0:17:44.994 on Facebook and I was very moved by it, and 0:17:45.074 --> 0:17:47.554 I could see that other people were too, And Mary 0:17:47.554 --> 0:17:48.874 and I talk about this a lot. In fact, we 0:17:48.874 --> 0:17:51.674 were talking about this this morning, that the things that 0:17:52.154 --> 0:17:55.514 bring us most happiness are kind of available to everyone, right, 0:17:55.714 --> 0:17:58.394 Like I love every day I drive past the ocean 0:17:58.434 --> 0:18:00.554 and I look at it and I go, oh my god, 0:18:00.594 --> 0:18:02.994 this is available to everyone. But it brings me so 0:18:03.194 --> 0:18:06.314 much joy. And it is the little it's the tiny 0:18:06.394 --> 0:18:07.794 things for me too. And I've had a lot of 0:18:08.034 --> 0:18:10.354 high highs. I think we all have had those big 0:18:10.394 --> 0:18:13.834 career highs. But the thing that makes me laugh, like 0:18:13.874 --> 0:18:15.514 I'll have something make me laugh and I will laugh 0:18:15.514 --> 0:18:18.513 about it for five years. Yeah, I'm not even kidding, 0:18:18.794 --> 0:18:20.273 and I will never forget. I saw a couple was 0:18:20.274 --> 0:18:21.954 there ape of years ago, but he was also someone 0:18:21.994 --> 0:18:23.434 who dealt with a lot of people who were very 0:18:23.434 --> 0:18:26.794 close to death, and he said, trust me, no one 0:18:26.834 --> 0:18:29.354 is ever thinking about like the houses they didn't have, 0:18:30.114 --> 0:18:32.273 the things they didn't have. Ever at the end of 0:18:32.314 --> 0:18:34.793 their life. They only thinking about their interactions with the 0:18:34.794 --> 0:18:37.074 people that they love. And so that I think that 0:18:37.274 --> 0:18:39.794 tiny joy thing and all those core memories that you have, 0:18:40.354 --> 0:18:42.914 I feel exactly the same way. It's all that. It's 0:18:42.994 --> 0:18:46.714 like playing cards with friends. It's it's you know, funny 0:18:46.754 --> 0:18:49.714 story shared over a meal. It's just stupid things we 0:18:49.754 --> 0:18:52.634 all do. And it is it really is the stuff. 0:18:52.634 --> 0:18:55.114 I mean, I don't want to, you know, sound too earnest, 0:18:55.114 --> 0:18:56.354 but it's the stuff that's free. 0:18:56.434 --> 0:18:58.194 It is. It is a free style. It's so true. 0:18:58.234 --> 0:18:59.074 That's a really good point. 0:18:59.154 --> 0:19:00.594 Yeah, Mary, what about you? 0:19:00.674 --> 0:19:05.074 Well, you know, Sally started talking and I immediately wanted 0:19:05.074 --> 0:19:08.914 to burst into tears. Just just just the way we 0:19:09.034 --> 0:19:12.754 choreograph our lives every day is really super important. And 0:19:12.794 --> 0:19:15.674 if you can find some joy in these little things, 0:19:15.714 --> 0:19:18.513 then you're covered. I really do think that you're equipped 0:19:18.754 --> 0:19:21.793 to handle the bigger things because you've always got those free, 0:19:22.434 --> 0:19:26.754 fundamental things to lean back on. Obviously, I had a 0:19:26.754 --> 0:19:29.594 long journey to motherhood, and I you know, during those 0:19:29.914 --> 0:19:34.194 endless IVF attempts, I would fantasize about what I wanted, 0:19:34.314 --> 0:19:36.274 not only the child, but the things that I would 0:19:36.314 --> 0:19:40.154 do with that child. And I conceived my child in Greece, 0:19:40.194 --> 0:19:44.314