WEBVTT - Your Quick Guide To Saying No

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<v Speaker 1>You're listening to a mother mea podcast. Okay, so you're

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<v Speaker 1>in a bit of a situation. Someone, your boss, your friend,

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<v Speaker 1>your partner has asked something of you, and your body

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<v Speaker 1>it's saying no, but your mind, your mind is spiraling.

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<v Speaker 1>What if they get mad at me? What if I

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<v Speaker 1>let them down? What if this changes how they see me?

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<v Speaker 1>And just like that, your people please are kicks in

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<v Speaker 1>and you're about to say yes even though you don't

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<v Speaker 1>mean it. If that feels familiar, this is for you

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<v Speaker 1>because setting boundaries isn't about being a bitch, and it

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<v Speaker 1>definitely doesn't make you a bad person. Boundaries aren't walls

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<v Speaker 1>their clarity. They're actually one of the most respectful things

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<v Speaker 1>you can bring into a relationship because when you're honest

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<v Speaker 1>about your capacity, your needs, your energy, you create relationships

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<v Speaker 1>that are built on truth, not resentment. So let's slow

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<v Speaker 1>it down a little. Before you automatically say yes. I

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<v Speaker 1>want you to get curious about what's happening inside of you.

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<v Speaker 1>What's the story you're telling yourself? If you say no,

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<v Speaker 1>is it? They'll be disappointed in me, I'll get in trouble,

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<v Speaker 1>they'll stop loving me. Notice that because a lot of

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<v Speaker 1>the time. We're not responding to the actual situation. We're

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<v Speaker 1>responding to a fear. Now, come back to you, why

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<v Speaker 1>do you actually want to say no. Maybe you don't

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<v Speaker 1>have the time, Maybe you're already overwhelmed. Maybe you know

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<v Speaker 1>you won't be able to show up fully and you'll

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<v Speaker 1>end up doing a rushed, half hearted job. That matters.

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<v Speaker 1>Your capacity matters. Now here's where we shift from awareness

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<v Speaker 1>into action. Instead of avoiding the conversation or over explaining,

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<v Speaker 1>we're going to communicate clearly. Here's a simple way to

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<v Speaker 1>do it. First, acknowledge the request, then share your honest reality,

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<v Speaker 1>and finally offer an alternative, if there is one. So

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<v Speaker 1>it might sound something like this, Hey, I know you

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<v Speaker 1>asked me to get this to you by tomorrow morning.

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<v Speaker 1>I actually won't be able to get it done by then,

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<v Speaker 1>but if I had an extra two days, I could

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<v Speaker 1>do it properly. Do you hear that you're not shutting

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<v Speaker 1>the door, You're opening a more honest one. And yes,

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<v Speaker 1>this might feel so uncomfortable at first, So if you

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<v Speaker 1>need to practice it, say it out loud, role play

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<v Speaker 1>it with someone you trust, because what you're really doing

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<v Speaker 1>here is you're teaching your body that it's safe to

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<v Speaker 1>hold your ground and that you're allowed to take up

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<v Speaker 1>space in your own life. Now, this is important. Setting

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<v Speaker 1>a boundary doesn't mean controlling the outcome. The other person

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<v Speaker 1>might have a reaction, they might push back, but this

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<v Speaker 1>is where your strength comes in. You can stay open

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<v Speaker 1>to the conversation without abandoning yourself in the process, because

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<v Speaker 1>boundaries aren't about winning or losing. They're about alignment. And

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<v Speaker 1>every time you choose honesty over people pleasing, you build

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<v Speaker 1>self trust, You show yourself I've got me, and that

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<v Speaker 1>that's where your power is. Mamma Mia acknowledges the traditional

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<v Speaker 1>owners of the land and waters that this podcast is

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<v Speaker 1>recorded on