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Speaker 1: This episode is brought to you by Woolworths Delivery Unlimited.

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Speaker 2: Acknowledge that it will be a bit rocky. You know

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Speaker 2: you might not fall on your feet first. Go give

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Speaker 2: yourself a bit of a break, don't be too hard

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Speaker 2: on yourself. And it's okay to look back and think,

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Speaker 2: oh God, I shouldn't have left, and but don't stay

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Speaker 2: in that space for too long. Own what you're doing

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Speaker 2: and look forward. I think that's something that we try

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Speaker 2: and still as read. The only thing we can control

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Speaker 2: right now is how I'm feeling right now.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Seas the Yay Podcast. Busy and happy

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Speaker 1: are not the same thing. We too rarely question what

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Speaker 1: makes the heart seeing. We work, then we rest, but

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Speaker 1: rarely we play and often don't realize there's more than

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Speaker 1: one way. So this is a platform to hear and

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Speaker 1: explore the stories of those who found lives. They adore,

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Speaker 1: the good, bad and ugly. The best and worst days

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Speaker 1: will bear all the facets of seizing your yay. I'm

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Speaker 1: Sarah Davidson or a spoonful of Sarah, a lawyer turned fu

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Speaker 1: entrepreneur who's wapped the suits and heels to co found

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Speaker 1: matcha maiden and matcha milk bar. The YA is a

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Speaker 1: series of conversations on finding a life you love and

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Speaker 1: exploring the self doubt, challenge, joy and fulfillment along the way. Well,

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Speaker 1: I can't believe we've reached our last guest interview for

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Speaker 1: the year. My gosh. We've had some touch and go

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Speaker 1: moments in twenty twenty one, in and out of lockdown

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Speaker 1: and therefore in and out of motivation, with rapidly changing

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Speaker 1: schedules to juggle and everything in between. But we made it,

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Speaker 1: and I'm so proud of the YA We've created in

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Speaker 1: our third year together. I can't say enough how grateful

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Speaker 1: I am for you, lovely yighborhood. I know I say

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Speaker 1: it all the time, Oh my gosh, I bang on

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Speaker 1: about it all the time, but you have genuinely kept

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Speaker 1: me saying this year and given me so many reasons

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Speaker 1: to smile with our healthcare worker care pack sendouts, our

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Speaker 1: Q and A episodes two mini series which was a

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Speaker 1: brand new idea, and just the lovely messages that you

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Speaker 1: guys take the time to send through each week about

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Speaker 1: particular episodes and how they impact your life. It just

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Speaker 1: makes my world so full of YEA. Even in the

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Speaker 1: midst of a pandemic. I will be taking a proper

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Speaker 1: break over the festive season for quite a few weeks

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Speaker 1: this time, just really need to refill the cup. But

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Speaker 1: as usual, we'll be re releasing some favorites in case

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Speaker 1: you missed any and we'll be back early next year

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Speaker 1: with Ange of course as well, joining us vias of

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Speaker 1: our lives to bring you bigger and better Yay next year.

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Speaker 1: For today, I couldn't think of a more perfect guest

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Speaker 1: or should I say guests to finish off the year

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Speaker 1: on a high than the two amazing humans that you're

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Speaker 1: about to hear from. And this episode is all the

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Speaker 1: more special because despite a massing and enormous community with

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Speaker 1: whom they share so much of their lives on social media,

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Speaker 1: this is the first time ever that they've shared their

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Speaker 1: story on a podcast and I'm still pinching myself that

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Speaker 1: they said yes, of course, I'm talking about the real

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Speaker 1: dads of Melbourne aka Jared and Michael, Doug and Tierney,

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Speaker 1: who give the beloved sitcom Modern Family such a good

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Speaker 1: run for its money, sharing their beautiful life as parents

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Speaker 1: to son Reid, who was born via a surrogate and

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Speaker 1: now as foster parents to baby Junior. They probably need

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Speaker 1: no introduction to most of you, stealing hearts all over

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Speaker 1: the nation and beyond for their hilariously down to worth

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Speaker 1: recounting of the ups and downs of family life. If

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Speaker 1: you haven't heard about them yet, you are in for

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Speaker 1: an absolute treat. And even if you do know them,

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Speaker 1: given that this is their first podcast ever, this is

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Speaker 1: the real Dads as you've never heard them before, covering

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Speaker 1: everything from coming out, meeting and falling in love at Quantus,

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Speaker 1: the process of surrogacy, and teaching your kids to embrace

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Speaker 1: their uniqueness. We're very lucky to share an incredible manager.

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Speaker 1: Shout out to Genevieve at day Management, who we absolutely

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Speaker 1: adore and I live around the corner from the Dads.

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Speaker 1: But there is so much in this one that I

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Speaker 1: hadn't heard before. I usually give away more teasers of

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Speaker 1: what's to come in the intro, but my words just

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Speaker 1: can't do their wit, honesty, love and genuineness, justice. There's laughter, tears,

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Speaker 1: and every other emotion in between in this one. I'll

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Speaker 1: let Jared and Michael tell you their story themselves, and

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Speaker 1: if you're not as in love with them as I am,

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Speaker 1: by the end, I'd be surprised. Jared and Michael aka

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Speaker 1: Real Dad's Welcome to the show.

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Speaker 3: Thanks so much, Sarah, thanks so much for having us.

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Speaker 1: I'm so excited to have you guys here today. I

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Speaker 1: always love chatting with you, but particularly as this is

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Speaker 1: your very first podcast ever. It feels like a real

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Speaker 1: honor to be able to share your story for the

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Speaker 1: first time in this format. And it's been such a

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Speaker 1: long time since we saw each other in person.

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Speaker 2: Well, I saw you up the street, but we couldn't

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Speaker 2: go in the back of your car taking a photo of.

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Speaker 1: As soon as I heard my name, I was like,

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Speaker 1: oh my god, it's happened. I've made it onto influences

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Speaker 1: in the wild and Nick trying to get a nice

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Speaker 1: candid photo of us in the boot of the car

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Speaker 1: as if we were actually like, we chose the most

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Speaker 1: obscure side streets so we wouldn't see any other humans

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Speaker 1: next in it.

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Speaker 3: Hums.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but you had Junior with you, guys. I think

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Speaker 1: it was one of your first walks and it was

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Speaker 1: just so beautiful.

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Speaker 3: That was pretty amazing.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, how special. And I cannot wait to

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Speaker 1: dive into this brand new addition to your family. But

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Speaker 1: also the whole journey of how you formed your wonderful family.

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Speaker 1: And I love that you guys think you're really boring

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Speaker 1: and uninteresting, but we all hold onto every single detail

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Speaker 1: of your life so thrilled to dive into it today.

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Speaker 1: But before we jump into that, I love to start

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Speaker 1: by breaking the eyes with what you guys think is

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Speaker 1: the most down to earth thing about you, even though

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Speaker 1: sometimes it seems like a jarring question or it seems

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Speaker 1: really straightforward. I think if people see only you guys

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Speaker 1: on social media, knowing that you have such a big following,

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Speaker 1: and it also often seems like you've got such clear

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Speaker 1: direction around, you know what you want out of life,

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Speaker 1: what your priorities are, how you know your family values.

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Speaker 1: And I think we all forget that all of us

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Speaker 1: have totally normal things, doubts and worries and like quirky

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Speaker 1: habits that we have. So what's something really normal about

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Speaker 1: you guys in between all the all the social gloss.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, as you say, I think we only share, like

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Speaker 3: anybody on social media, highlights of your life or you know,

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Speaker 3: things you're passionate about. So I think we're pretty transparent

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Speaker 3: and we share down to earth. Yeah, spects of our life.

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Speaker 3: I'm sitting Michael from the top up, I'm in a

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Speaker 3: share from the bottom.

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Speaker 1: Down, I'm in track pants, same babe.

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Speaker 3: That pretty much represents who we are, you know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think what you touched on before about is

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Speaker 2: just being pretty boring. I think we're average guys, you know,

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Speaker 2: doing doing life. Yeah. Yeah, we're obviously very proud dads.

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Speaker 2: And that's the most important part of her life is

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Speaker 2: read so hopefully creating a safe and secure mind socurre

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Speaker 2: in moment for him and you know, watching him grow

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Speaker 2: and learn and be able to navigate this tricky world.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely, I think you guys do that so well with

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Speaker 1: such grace and also such honesty. You kind of it's

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Speaker 1: not like you're telling this story retrospectively. You've actually really

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Speaker 1: brought a lot of your followers along the ride from

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Speaker 1: the very beginning and navigating all the different chapters, and

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Speaker 1: you know that you share a lot of that along

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Speaker 1: the way. And I think you've become really really big

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Speaker 1: role models for so many people who have families that

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Speaker 1: look a little bit different to what you know, the

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Speaker 1: conventional or traditional family structure looks like, and are really

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Speaker 1: helping others embrace and own that, which is so beautiful.

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Speaker 1: I have so much admiration for you both.

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Speaker 2: Thank you, Thank you. Yeah, difference is something that I

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Speaker 2: think should be celebrated, something that we're really proud of

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Speaker 2: to be, you know, challenging that social norm.

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Speaker 1: I suppose, yeah, And I think you do it so well.

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Speaker 1: And I think the more that people can see, like,

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Speaker 1: I think one of the big problems with representation in

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Speaker 1: any area is that people often look at the landscape

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Speaker 1: and can't see themselves, or they can't see their family,

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Speaker 1: or they can't see their situation represented anywhere because either

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Speaker 1: people don't share it or haven't felt comfortable, or it's

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Speaker 1: stigmatized or whatever. But I love how you guys are

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Speaker 1: just putting your modern family out there and sharing all

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Speaker 1: the parts of it that make it hard and far

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Speaker 1: and easy and beautiful. And yeah, I think the real

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Speaker 1: dads is it's replaced modern family as a channel for

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Speaker 1: me to watch and I kind of just want you

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Speaker 1: guys to be like my dad's also.

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Speaker 3: After all these years is our username. It's something that

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Speaker 3: Michael wants to keep it. He's happy to keep it

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Speaker 3: because he actually just doesn't care what the name of it.

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Speaker 3: It makes me cringe, Like the Real Dad a lot

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Speaker 3: of new you know, if you get a new follow.

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Speaker 2: Or something like Real Dads.

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Speaker 3: You know, used to sound like a couple of wan

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Speaker 3: because it was a stupid spin off of a TV

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Speaker 3: series before it even was an Australian TV series. It

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Speaker 3: was just The Real Housewives of OC or something that

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Speaker 3: I used to watch and it was just a username.

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Speaker 3: Whereas we did laughed having a bit of a life.

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Speaker 3: We didn't think it'd be that popular.

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Speaker 1: It's so popular. It turns out you've got like an

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Speaker 1: entire tribe of people following you. I also love how

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Speaker 1: it's Real Dads and like we expect that it's a

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Speaker 1: shared account, you'll hear both voices, but really it's just

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Speaker 1: Jared and Michael like vaguely tolerating and like sometimes being

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Speaker 1: in the background.

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Speaker 3: I mean, it's both of us to contribute to it.

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Speaker 3: It's you know, like I'm like, can I share that?

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Speaker 3: Mark's like, fuck, no, you cannot share that, so therefore

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Speaker 3: it doesn't chair. But he also edits a lot of

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Speaker 3: the scripts. I don't ever ever share anything, not one

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Speaker 3: images on there that you've not looked at and gone, okay,

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Speaker 3: you're representing our family, you can do that. So there

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Speaker 3: is definitely the creative.

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Speaker 2: I'm definitely the witty one with a wicked sense of humor.

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Speaker 1: Oh, I think both of you are. I mean we

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Speaker 1: just before we started recording, we're talking about the great

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Speaker 1: circle carpet gage that's been happening in your family of late.

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Speaker 1: There was a.

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Speaker 2: I stepped over that rug for two weeks trying to

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Speaker 2: lay it at the bottom of the stairs.

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Speaker 3: It was like laid out on the ground thing. Heavens

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Speaker 3: we haven't had any visitors because like it was a trip.

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Speaker 1: Oh wait, I mean I was looking at it, thinking

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Speaker 1: that's a disaster. I mean, read has Dad's classes in

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Speaker 1: the house, Like, but I love how Michael just like

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Speaker 1: stepped right over it, like no, I will cut it later.

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Speaker 1: I think it ended up in a bed at one point.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right.

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Speaker 3: I was like, well, tried to get it in his car,

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Speaker 3: Like I was down in the garage heaving that bloody

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Speaker 3: thing into the car, and then I couldn't get the

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Speaker 3: door closed.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, no, this is no, this is just not

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Speaker 2: what I should be doing with it.

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Speaker 3: So I bought it back upstairs and then I moved

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Speaker 3: to a couple more locations, and yes, ended up in

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Speaker 3: the bed Michael.

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Speaker 2: He has to go to bed sometimes.

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Speaker 1: Basically, Jared had a car, but he wanted to cut

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Speaker 1: into a circle. Michael had to cut it into a circle.

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Speaker 1: It was a big disaster. It didn't get cut into

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Speaker 1: a circle. And then when it did get cut into

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Speaker 1: the circle, it was laid out like only the cutouts

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Speaker 1: from around the circle were cut out and put into

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Speaker 1: the room, which I also think is beautiful. So you

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Speaker 1: say that Jared is the joker in the relationship, Michael,

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Speaker 1: but I don't believe that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's true.

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Speaker 2: It was pretty funny Jared. It amusing, but I thought

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Speaker 2: it was absolutely hysterical.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. Well, the very first section of this show,

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Speaker 1: as you guys probably already know, is Your Way TA

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Speaker 1: or Your Pathya, which is pretty much tracing back all

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Speaker 1: the chapters of your life before the one. Like you mentioned,

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Speaker 1: you know, you have a lot of people who have

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Speaker 1: started following you recently and walk into your life and

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Speaker 1: presents as if you know. I think we just forget

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Speaker 1: that everyone has been through a lot of angst and

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Speaker 1: a lot of diversions and not knowing what your purpose

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Speaker 1: or your goals in life. Are along the way, and

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Speaker 1: I love tracing back through them to show that just

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Speaker 1: life is not linear. Finding your joy and finding your

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Speaker 1: partner in yea is also not linear, and taking the

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Speaker 1: right time, you know, to become the person you are

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Speaker 1: is never a kind of an overnight success. So can

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Speaker 1: you guys take us back to your younger selves, what

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Speaker 1: you were like as kids? And this can be like

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Speaker 1: pre each other as well, because I think sometimes when

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Speaker 1: you get known as a couple again, like people can

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Speaker 1: conflate your identities, but also forget that you were different

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Speaker 1: people before you met and then that you have this

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Speaker 1: beautiful love story as well. So yeah, let's go back

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Speaker 1: to childhood first and go through what you were like

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Speaker 1: as kids, what you loved, what you thought you'd be.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Sure.

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Speaker 3: I was born in Mildura.

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Speaker 2: Oh Miltura, Yeah yeah, country boy. My mum is still

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Speaker 2: there with most of my family. I have one that

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Speaker 2: lives here in Melbourne. Growing up as a kid, there

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Speaker 2: was a lot of fun, you know, a lot of

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Speaker 2: open space and the weather really good times. My dad

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Speaker 2: was really sick. He had cancer when I was really little,

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Speaker 2: so I think my childhood went from being an innocent

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Speaker 2: little boy to stepping up and being a sense of

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Speaker 2: strength of my mum who wasn't coping very well with

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Speaker 2: dad's illness. Mum and Dad spent a lot of time

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Speaker 2: in Melbourne, and my brother and I stayed with my grandparents,

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Speaker 2: our grandparents there.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, I think I.

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Speaker 2: Just learned to step up and feel just the need

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Speaker 2: to sort of make people feel okay, and that was

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Speaker 2: sort of my job, which is really interesting now that

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Speaker 2: I look back, as the way I parent read or

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Speaker 2: the way that I am with people is just sort

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Speaker 2: of reliable, and I really link that back to them

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Speaker 2: that when I yeah, I was really young, so it's extraordinary.

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Speaker 2: Part of our fostering program, we had to write our

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Speaker 2: life story and that's something that was so cathartic. Not

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Speaker 2: many people get the opportunity to sit down and you know,

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Speaker 2: take the time to do that. It was a really

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Speaker 2: incredible lesson for myself to look back as to you know,

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Speaker 2: why I am the person that I am now. I mean,

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Speaker 2: if everyone would do it, it's the most incredible exercise,

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Speaker 2: but we just don't have a lot of time to

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Speaker 2: do that sort of stuff. It was was amazing anyway,

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Speaker 2: I digress there. Yeah, as a kid, I was just

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Speaker 2: very sort of happy and outgoing. And yeah, I obviously

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Speaker 2: didn't come out till much later, but I knew always

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Speaker 2: I was different. I knew I just didn't fit the mold.

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Speaker 2: But I could never understand why I'd never metiga person

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Speaker 2: at all, and that obviously wasn't on my radar at all.

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Speaker 2: But it wasn't un till my twenties and I sort

293
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Speaker 2: of worked out how I, you know, fitted in and I

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Speaker 2: suppose discovered my own identity and truth.

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Speaker 1: Wow, isn't it so interesting? This is why I love

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Speaker 1: this section so much, which you know, at the start,

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Speaker 1: I think a lot of people are like, oh, we're

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Speaker 1: going back so far into the past. But it's quite

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Speaker 1: often that you'll see people connecting the dots as they're

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Speaker 1: reflecting on their story, and sometimes for the first time

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Speaker 1: they're going, ah, I didn't know that that was, you know,

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Speaker 1: planting a seed for twenty years later, or I didn't

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Speaker 1: realize that that the genesis of this big revelation when

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Speaker 1: I was forty, you know, started back when I was six.

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Speaker 1: And it's sort of beautiful to let people see that

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Speaker 1: their life is really just a big jigsaw puzzle. And

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Speaker 1: for other people who are often, I think, come to

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Speaker 1: this show feeling confused about their direction, or lost about

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Speaker 1: their identity, or on the cusp of a big change,

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Speaker 1: just to hear that really no one has ever really

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Speaker 1: had it figured out. Very few people wake up and go,

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Speaker 1: I know my sexuality, I know my passions, I know

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Speaker 1: my joys, I know my dislikes, and this is my life.

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Speaker 1: Like it just doesn't happen that way, So.

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Speaker 2: I don't know that way. That's so true.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I love that that came up so early for you,

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Speaker 1: that the first time you ever sat down to write

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Speaker 1: your history was such a cathartic kind of moment for you.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, and what was for the whole family really

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Speaker 3: because we also you know, sat with read and explained

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Speaker 3: to him after we reflected on everything and we sort

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Speaker 3: of told him our full life stories as well.

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Speaker 2: He's at an.

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Speaker 3: Age now which he's living those years that we lived,

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Speaker 3: and it was really really powerful.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, as I mentioned, it was a really really powerful exercise.

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Speaker 3: And as far as myself, I grew up in Tazzy,

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Speaker 3: you know, in a time before social media, in a

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Speaker 3: time before computer games. Really all some families had computi games.

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Speaker 2: We didn't have them.

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Speaker 3: I've got an older brother who's five years older than

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Speaker 3: I am, and I've got a sister who's eight years younger. Yeah,

334
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Speaker 3: Mum remarried when I was little and they had my sister,

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Speaker 3: so that's why the big age gap. My father lives

336
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Speaker 3: in the Sunshine Coast. He remarried and had three children

337
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Speaker 3: to the six of us in total. I lived out

338
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Speaker 3: of just out of Hope Art. We lived on four acres,

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Speaker 3: so our house was sort of in the middle of

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Speaker 3: those four acres, and I played on my BMX bike.

341
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Speaker 3: I built cubby houses. I was laughing at me for

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Speaker 3: some strangeries.

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Speaker 2: And there's a lot about my stories of you you know,

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Speaker 2: like lighting fires and yeah, I used to steal a

345
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Speaker 2: mum's cigarette lighter and go a light of bush and

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Speaker 2: then things would get out a little bit out of

347
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Speaker 2: hand and I'd have to, you know, like write it.

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Speaker 3: In a little bit of hometell Mum, you know why

349
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Speaker 3: am my clothes burnt? Or why I smell like smoke?

350
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Speaker 3: I haven't been smoking down there. I've been like, you know,

351
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Speaker 3: seting fire.

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Speaker 1: You know, just extreme. That's fine, exactly. That sounds like

353
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Speaker 1: such a typical tazzy upbringing. You guys know, Nick's from Devinpoort,

354
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Speaker 1: same things, Like my childhood was how did I survive?

355
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Speaker 2: Like wild exactly?

356
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Speaker 3: Now I'm like, oh my godness, we're so precious, you know,

357
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Speaker 3: I keep doing anything like really like even he's mad

358
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Speaker 3: about rollerskating at the moment, and he's probably doesn't need

359
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Speaker 3: as much protective whereas he does, but he leaves here

360
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Speaker 3: like looking I know, like.

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Speaker 2: He's if he could rollerskate in one of those sumo suits,

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Speaker 2: we would then keep you wearing it, you know, give

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Speaker 2: a minute.

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Speaker 3: We petrified he's going to break a leg or yeah

365
00:16:56,320 --> 00:16:59,520
Speaker 3: where yeah, yeah, see in the afternoon, if I go

366
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Speaker 3: on my bike without a helmet, you know, oh my god.

367
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Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think we knew what helmets were back then,

368
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Speaker 1: although I mean I'm glad we've come a long way

369
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Speaker 1: and child's safety and so like, were you, you know,

370
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Speaker 1: quite outdoorsy? What did you think that would translate to?

371
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Speaker 1: Because I always think it's really interesting to go back

372
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Speaker 1: to what you thought you'd be as well, because at

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Speaker 1: some point in all of our childhoods, we go from

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Speaker 1: the intersection between what you're good at and what you

375
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Speaker 1: love and that's your future and then suddenly you let

376
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Speaker 1: like social expectation and financial stability and all these other

377
00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:36,120
Speaker 1: weird concepts start to dictate your decisions. So when did

378
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Speaker 1: you start to think about, like what you wanted to become?

379
00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:41,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, look at my my, My part of that story

380
00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:43,320
Speaker 3: is very boring. I still don't know what I want

381
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Speaker 3: to be when I grow up. I have no idea

382
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Speaker 3: what I want to be. I'm just living my life

383
00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:51,720
Speaker 3: right now. And you know, of course, so much comes

384
00:17:51,760 --> 00:17:54,600
Speaker 3: into it. Like you just said, you know, you're worry about,

385
00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:57,159
Speaker 3: you know, stability, and you know where you're going to

386
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Speaker 3: be and will you make it to retirement and what

387
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Speaker 3: your retirement.

388
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Speaker 2: It looks like.

389
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Speaker 3: And it's only recently, you know, we've been together now

390
00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:06,159
Speaker 3: over twenty years. It's only recently the last couple of

391
00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:09,160
Speaker 3: years that we've gone hold on, we need to think

392
00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:12,119
Speaker 3: about like our retirement. We've always been very sensible with

393
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Speaker 3: money and always you know, tried really hard to you know,

394
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Speaker 3: have stability in that area for sure, But it's like

395
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:22,280
Speaker 3: what's retirement looked like? You know, your income stream stops,

396
00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:26,320
Speaker 3: but your lifestyle doesn't, you know, you know, even the

397
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:28,000
Speaker 3: mean it's changed in the last two years. But like

398
00:18:28,080 --> 00:18:29,920
Speaker 3: I don't think we'll travel. That's why we decided to

399
00:18:29,920 --> 00:18:32,159
Speaker 3: buy a house out of town, because we're like, that

400
00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:34,040
Speaker 3: will be what our retirement now looks like. It was

401
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:36,480
Speaker 3: totally different to what our retirement looked like two years ago.

402
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Speaker 2: So absolutely, I think that you're looking at retirements just

403
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:44,280
Speaker 2: just a word. I'm fifty next year, which means that

404
00:18:44,520 --> 00:18:45,080
Speaker 2: stop it.

405
00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:48,960
Speaker 1: I know, my God, tell me about your skincare immediately

406
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:54,240
Speaker 1: that's the Apple Market's like, it's it's the filter.

407
00:18:55,840 --> 00:18:56,160
Speaker 3: I know.

408
00:18:56,440 --> 00:19:00,800
Speaker 2: And thinking that that word is now something that's only

409
00:19:01,119 --> 00:19:04,840
Speaker 2: ten years away, so we really do have to think

410
00:19:04,840 --> 00:19:07,200
Speaker 2: about that and plan for it, which where.

411
00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:09,760
Speaker 3: We've done, we've got someone in charge of that. Now

412
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:10,800
Speaker 3: it's all very grown up.

413
00:19:11,119 --> 00:19:12,480
Speaker 2: It is so grown up.

414
00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:17,960
Speaker 1: I actually have this like dawning horrible realization that I'm

415
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:19,840
Speaker 1: never going to wake up one day and feel grown up,

416
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:22,040
Speaker 1: Like it's just going to be decayed after decade, still going.

417
00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:25,520
Speaker 1: There are some more adultier adults like that. I asked

418
00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:26,800
Speaker 1: what to do about stuff.

419
00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:29,840
Speaker 3: I see them, like, you know, people come up on

420
00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:31,399
Speaker 3: the news and their title come over and I'm like,

421
00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:34,200
Speaker 3: oh my god, okay, young I look Michael, You're like, oh,

422
00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:35,480
Speaker 3: that's because we're actually old.

423
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Speaker 2: Now.

424
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Speaker 1: Mine is when I see like a twenty nine year

425
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Speaker 1: old with a baby and I'm like, oh, it's a

426
00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:46,720
Speaker 1: teenage mum, so sweet and like innocent. Oh my god,

427
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,560
Speaker 1: there must be really tough for you. And then I'm like,

428
00:19:48,840 --> 00:19:53,000
Speaker 1: that's the normal age when people actually voluntarily have children

429
00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:57,280
Speaker 1: do that. And it's so cool that you guys have

430
00:19:57,359 --> 00:20:00,119
Speaker 1: been together for twenty years because again I also think

431
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,440
Speaker 1: you know you're mentioning that your priorities have been shifting.

432
00:20:02,520 --> 00:20:05,399
Speaker 1: It's so interesting in relationships like Nick and I are

433
00:20:05,680 --> 00:20:08,600
Speaker 1: nearly twelve years, which is quite a long time given

434
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:13,080
Speaker 1: like that I'm only thirty two. But in relationships, I

435
00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:15,960
Speaker 1: love that you have to go through like lots of

436
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:18,440
Speaker 1: chapters together, and you've been through lots of those together.

437
00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:19,920
Speaker 1: But I'd love to go right back to the very

438
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:23,840
Speaker 1: beginning when you both first came out, because only if

439
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,360
Speaker 1: you're comfortable talking about it, of course, but I think

440
00:20:26,440 --> 00:20:29,160
Speaker 1: both of you coming from like smaller towns or smaller

441
00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:32,920
Speaker 1: areas where and particularly before social media, where you might

442
00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:35,640
Speaker 1: often not have even had the language or the skills

443
00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:38,880
Speaker 1: to even identify what you were feeling, let alone actually

444
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:41,640
Speaker 1: then do something about it. Come out to your families,

445
00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:44,159
Speaker 1: to your friends, but then also you know, leading you

446
00:20:44,240 --> 00:20:47,080
Speaker 1: to find each other. How did that all unravel for

447
00:20:47,119 --> 00:20:47,560
Speaker 1: both of you?

448
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,760
Speaker 3: Well, I think our stories were probably very different in

449
00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:52,560
Speaker 3: that respect. I didn't come out to my family until

450
00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:56,120
Speaker 3: I was in a state of relationship with Michael. We've

451
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:58,960
Speaker 3: been together for a few months. They knew him as

452
00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:01,600
Speaker 3: just a friend, or I thought they knew him was

453
00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:04,679
Speaker 3: just a friend. But you know, they all knew your

454
00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:08,399
Speaker 3: mum's no mom, no best you know mums like I

455
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:13,000
Speaker 3: always knew and didn't didn't bother her at all, which

456
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,800
Speaker 3: it shouldn't, you know. And we were actually like we're

457
00:21:15,840 --> 00:21:18,840
Speaker 3: talking about obviously coming on to your podcast. I'm like,

458
00:21:19,240 --> 00:21:21,800
Speaker 3: if that questions asked, wouldn't it be amazing? One day

459
00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:25,600
Speaker 3: we understand why it is asked now, especially in our generation,

460
00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:28,400
Speaker 3: but one day that's not a question like it's when

461
00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:28,959
Speaker 3: did you come out?

462
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:30,680
Speaker 2: It's like, well, when did you not come out?

463
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:31,119
Speaker 3: You know?

464
00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:34,399
Speaker 1: I think there are actually people I've had someone on

465
00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:36,280
Speaker 1: the podcast who was like, I never came out. I

466
00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:39,680
Speaker 1: never came out. I never needed to make an announcement.

467
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:41,560
Speaker 1: I just was how I am.

468
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:43,560
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yeah, that was that's amazing.

469
00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:46,159
Speaker 3: That's it. That's what we hope, and we hope, you know,

470
00:21:46,200 --> 00:21:50,120
Speaker 3: in Read's generation and his children that it's just that's

471
00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:54,320
Speaker 3: just not a question anymore. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah.

472
00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:57,440
Speaker 2: Me, My story is a bit different. As I mentioned before,

473
00:21:57,440 --> 00:22:00,119
Speaker 2: growing up in a small country town with you and

474
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:05,200
Speaker 2: met a gay person. Never could I identify with homosexuality.

475
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:09,080
Speaker 2: And it wasn't until I became a flight attendant, which is,

476
00:22:10,119 --> 00:22:11,560
Speaker 2: you know, the quintessential gay role.

477
00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:17,280
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm glad you said that, not me. Okay, good,

478
00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:18,240
Speaker 1: we're allowed to acknowledge it.

479
00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:20,080
Speaker 3: I don't know.

480
00:22:20,359 --> 00:22:23,000
Speaker 2: And I came to Melbourne for my training and I

481
00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:25,840
Speaker 2: met gay people when I'm like, wow, this is amazing,

482
00:22:25,880 --> 00:22:29,439
Speaker 2: Like I finally sort of have found my people. So

483
00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:30,760
Speaker 2: it was interesting.

484
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:31,199
Speaker 3: You know.

485
00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:34,080
Speaker 2: I didn't come out for another couple of years after that,

486
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:38,080
Speaker 2: whilst I sort of you know, navigated my journey, but

487
00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:41,960
Speaker 2: coming out to mum and Dad was something that I

488
00:22:41,680 --> 00:22:45,040
Speaker 2: did first. I just if you're being really honest with

489
00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:47,440
Speaker 2: yourself that you know, they don't really know you unless

490
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:50,439
Speaker 2: they've got your whole story, you know. I told my

491
00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:52,600
Speaker 2: brother first and asked him to come with me to

492
00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:54,560
Speaker 2: a family meeting with Mum and Dad, we'd never had

493
00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:56,800
Speaker 2: a family meeting in our lives, Like, what's this about?

494
00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:57,960
Speaker 1: I was going to say, what do you mean for

495
00:22:58,760 --> 00:22:59,680
Speaker 1: that's a regular thing?

496
00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:02,240
Speaker 2: Mom thought I was there to tell her that my

497
00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:04,600
Speaker 2: housemate was pregnant to you.

498
00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:09,719
Speaker 3: So that was confusing and awkward.

499
00:23:09,880 --> 00:23:12,879
Speaker 1: But look, the gender reveal balloon was no longer appropriate.

500
00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:19,399
Speaker 2: But look, yeah, my brother was really supportive. Mum cried

501
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:22,040
Speaker 2: just for the reasons. I don't think she could understand

502
00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:26,400
Speaker 2: what that future look like for her son. Dad was amazing.

503
00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:29,320
Speaker 2: Dad was He said something like, it was quite funny.

504
00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:31,560
Speaker 2: We can't do anything about that now. But what he

505
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:33,800
Speaker 2: meant by that was the next day he caught me

506
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:35,720
Speaker 2: up again and is like, what I meant by that, Well,

507
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:38,240
Speaker 2: that doesn't it doesn't matter, it never has that. We

508
00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:39,760
Speaker 2: don't need to do anything about that.

509
00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:43,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, not like it's too late for me to fix that.

510
00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:45,560
Speaker 1: Not what he meant.

511
00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:48,040
Speaker 2: What he meant, but he didn't have the ability to

512
00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:51,320
Speaker 2: articulate how he was feeling. But it was also very

513
00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:56,000
Speaker 2: strange because my brother, who had battled a long time

514
00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:59,520
Speaker 2: of drug use and depression and went down that road

515
00:24:00,280 --> 00:24:04,240
Speaker 2: really really young as a young teenager, was all the

516
00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:08,560
Speaker 2: result of him being abused as a child unbeknownst to anyone.

517
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:12,000
Speaker 2: So on one hand, you know, my brother had, you know,

518
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:16,160
Speaker 2: these experiences with a pedophile, and it was really important

519
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:21,359
Speaker 2: that I share my feelings with with him first, you know,

520
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:23,199
Speaker 2: just I don't know, I was just so confusing to

521
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:29,399
Speaker 2: separate that that, you know, predator unwanted advances to someone

522
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:32,360
Speaker 2: who is attracted to men. So you know, I had

523
00:24:32,560 --> 00:24:34,720
Speaker 2: how does this work in my head? How does he feel?

524
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:37,000
Speaker 2: What's mum and dad's take on all of this? So

525
00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:39,960
Speaker 2: it was quite quite the journey. But my brother, God

526
00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:41,720
Speaker 2: love him, and my late brother's passed away.

527
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:43,440
Speaker 3: He was the most.

528
00:24:43,200 --> 00:24:47,399
Speaker 2: Amazing, amazing man and with you know, his open heart

529
00:24:47,680 --> 00:24:50,720
Speaker 2: explained you know, his feelings and his love for me,

530
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:54,120
Speaker 2: and but you know I needed his love and blessing

531
00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:56,040
Speaker 2: and we went through that together.

532
00:24:57,080 --> 00:24:58,360
Speaker 3: And you know the rest of my.

533
00:24:58,320 --> 00:25:01,919
Speaker 2: Family they've found out. And yeah, I've never been treated

534
00:25:01,920 --> 00:25:05,680
Speaker 2: any any differently, nor should anyone, And yeah, I think

535
00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:10,440
Speaker 2: it's something until the same sex marriage was pasted, didn't

536
00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:13,320
Speaker 2: understand the impact of being able to be married or

537
00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:15,080
Speaker 2: having that choice, So.

538
00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:18,200
Speaker 3: It wasn't something really, I don't think even our relationship

539
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:21,600
Speaker 3: earlier that We always said we wanted to have a

540
00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:24,480
Speaker 3: child like that was very spoken on very early, but

541
00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:28,320
Speaker 3: marriage was never because I think it was we weren't allowed.

542
00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:31,120
Speaker 3: It was not an option for us, so we're okay.

543
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:33,439
Speaker 3: It was just like it's the times that we live in.

544
00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:34,640
Speaker 2: I don't I know think.

545
00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:37,119
Speaker 3: I think it's like anything in our relationship and anything

546
00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:42,200
Speaker 3: in our lives personally, we don't really want anything that's unachievable,

547
00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:44,960
Speaker 3: like we need to know it's there to grab.

548
00:25:44,840 --> 00:25:47,520
Speaker 2: It sort of thing, whereas we just don't know. It

549
00:25:47,520 --> 00:25:48,480
Speaker 2: didn't allow ourselves.

550
00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:50,840
Speaker 3: We never went we're not allowed to get.

551
00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:53,320
Speaker 1: Married, or like it was just you just didn't even

552
00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:54,200
Speaker 1: think about it.

553
00:25:55,680 --> 00:25:56,879
Speaker 2: Oh, didn't register.

554
00:25:57,080 --> 00:25:59,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think that's why it's one of those

555
00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:02,720
Speaker 1: things where you do hope that in future generations, and

556
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:04,760
Speaker 1: I think we are moving the conversation along at a

557
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,480
Speaker 1: rapid pace in this last sort of five to ten years.

558
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 1: It is something you hope that in the future, gay

559
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:14,480
Speaker 1: couples or non binary people don't actually have to come

560
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:16,399
Speaker 1: out and they don't have to answer these questions. But

561
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:19,199
Speaker 1: I think now the reason why I do ask is

562
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:22,399
Speaker 1: because you're providing in these answers so much reassurance for

563
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:25,280
Speaker 1: people who might live in small country towns now or

564
00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:29,240
Speaker 1: who might be up against religious or socio cultural reasons

565
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:33,040
Speaker 1: why their family perhaps aren't as progressed in the conversation.

566
00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:36,639
Speaker 1: And I think also because some coming out stories are

567
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:39,160
Speaker 1: very positive for some people, it costs them a lot.

568
00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:42,639
Speaker 1: But it's weighing up the cost of well, do you

569
00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:45,520
Speaker 1: want to live your life as you are and maybe

570
00:26:45,560 --> 00:26:47,280
Speaker 1: lose a few people along the way, or just face

571
00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:49,439
Speaker 1: some challenge and some pain in that process, or do

572
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:51,320
Speaker 1: you want to keep hiding it at the expense of

573
00:26:52,440 --> 00:26:55,280
Speaker 1: living your life and finding your partner and then being

574
00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:57,320
Speaker 1: able to get married you know, when the law finally

575
00:26:57,359 --> 00:26:59,960
Speaker 1: caught up along a long time later. But the way

576
00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:03,399
Speaker 1: that you guys do talk about your you know, coming

577
00:27:03,440 --> 00:27:06,159
Speaker 1: out times and also the things you've navigated as a

578
00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:09,199
Speaker 1: couple as well, it helps other people so much not

579
00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:10,719
Speaker 1: feel alone in that experience.

580
00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:13,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think the reason why I came out

581
00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:16,840
Speaker 3: was I was starting to have to sort of lie,

582
00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:21,199
Speaker 3: and that's just a massive thing. You know, like a

583
00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:23,240
Speaker 3: parent or a friend even would say, oh, you know,

584
00:27:23,400 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 3: who's Michael or where are you going? You know, why

585
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 3: are you going to see Michael? Again or whatever.

586
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:31,280
Speaker 1: Why are you guys naked in the shower.

587
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:41,359
Speaker 3: If you're having to start lying lying to cover up

588
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:45,160
Speaker 3: what is something that is love? Then it was time

589
00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:47,639
Speaker 3: I had to tell someone. So I did mine in

590
00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:51,040
Speaker 3: the form of writing my mother a letter and I

591
00:27:51,160 --> 00:27:54,320
Speaker 3: left it on the kitchen bench. That afternoon, she drove

592
00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:56,640
Speaker 3: me to the airport because I was moving to Melbourne

593
00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:57,160
Speaker 3: to live.

594
00:27:57,440 --> 00:27:58,440
Speaker 2: With Michael.

595
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:02,360
Speaker 1: With your mate from Footy.

596
00:28:03,800 --> 00:28:07,080
Speaker 3: Exactly so. And then and at the bottom of the letter,

597
00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:08,720
Speaker 3: it's like a three page letter. I wish I had

598
00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 3: actually kept a copy of that letter, just so that

599
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:14,119
Speaker 3: I can reflect on it now, you know, all these

600
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:16,600
Speaker 3: years later as to would have written the same thing,

601
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:17,800
Speaker 3: And how did I justify it?

602
00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:19,840
Speaker 2: Because I don't actually remember, because it would have been.

603
00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:22,480
Speaker 3: You know, I would have been quite numb writing, you know,

604
00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:24,560
Speaker 3: most of it, because I'm like, oh my god, my mother.

605
00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:27,359
Speaker 2: You know, I wasn't explicit in it. Let me just

606
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:28,440
Speaker 2: I am telling her what.

607
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:35,919
Speaker 1: I was just, you know, Mum, sometimes there are two bees.

608
00:28:37,119 --> 00:28:38,960
Speaker 3: I think I made a reference in me that I'm

609
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 3: not going to be wearing PVC, just to clarify that.

610
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 3: And I wish I wish I had a copy of

611
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:46,680
Speaker 3: that letter.

612
00:28:46,920 --> 00:28:48,560
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that'd be amazing.

613
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:51,640
Speaker 3: And the very last sentence was like, and please don't

614
00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:52,880
Speaker 3: ring me in discuss this light.

615
00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:55,080
Speaker 1: In the past.

616
00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:56,880
Speaker 2: Let's all move on.

617
00:28:57,040 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 3: And however you want to move on, you know, we

618
00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:02,720
Speaker 3: never speak of it again. And then of course I

619
00:29:02,800 --> 00:29:04,880
Speaker 3: get to Melbourne and get off the plane, turn my

620
00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:06,920
Speaker 3: phone on. It was ringing, like I was ringing as

621
00:29:06,960 --> 00:29:09,040
Speaker 3: I was holding it on button, and Mum's name was there.

622
00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:12,360
Speaker 3: I was like, Michael was there. What I hadn't told

623
00:29:12,360 --> 00:29:14,200
Speaker 3: Michael that I'd written them the letter? You know, we

624
00:29:14,320 --> 00:29:16,320
Speaker 3: spoke about it. We'd only been dating three months when

625
00:29:16,360 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 3: I moved state for him and he got a train.

626
00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:23,840
Speaker 2: And Mum was like, I got your letter.

627
00:29:25,520 --> 00:29:28,440
Speaker 3: And I was just like sweating, and I'm like yeah,

628
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:32,720
Speaker 3: and she's like it's fine, you know, like I.

629
00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:32,880
Speaker 2: Knew, so.

630
00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:38,400
Speaker 1: No surprise base exactly.

631
00:29:37,960 --> 00:29:41,680
Speaker 3: Exactly as Michael said, parents, I think, you know, they's

632
00:29:42,160 --> 00:29:45,160
Speaker 3: you know, amazing supportive parents, Like we were very fortunate

633
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:48,000
Speaker 3: to both have struggle what to say, you know, because

634
00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:50,400
Speaker 3: they also don't know what's right or wrong to say

635
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:54,120
Speaker 3: to you, you know, like your dad, his intentions were amazing.

636
00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:55,960
Speaker 3: But some people would read that and go, oh, you

637
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:58,280
Speaker 3: know here hear that and go, what do you mean

638
00:29:58,320 --> 00:30:00,959
Speaker 3: you you just you know, you're hay with it, like

639
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:06,600
Speaker 3: it's yeah, it's not an it, it's just yeah, so yeah.

640
00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:09,360
Speaker 1: I think also what's really interesting is because when you

641
00:30:09,400 --> 00:30:12,920
Speaker 1: both did come out, it was a very different generation generally,

642
00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:16,880
Speaker 1: and it's you know, the kind of homosexual couples have

643
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,520
Speaker 1: come a long way in society as being normalized and

644
00:30:19,560 --> 00:30:21,400
Speaker 1: spoken about a lot more. There's marriage. You know, a

645
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:23,880
Speaker 1: lot of us have a married couple in our friendship groups.

646
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:26,800
Speaker 1: I think now that that's where the non binary conversation

647
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:30,160
Speaker 1: is sitting, and it's important for people to remember that,

648
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:34,280
Speaker 1: like in the beginning of anything that starts to become

649
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:37,160
Speaker 1: more socially discussed, there is a lot of and not

650
00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:39,720
Speaker 1: even malicious, but there's a lot of questions from people

651
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:41,760
Speaker 1: around how do they act And it's an out of

652
00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:44,080
Speaker 1: care for you as well, like not offending you or

653
00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:46,480
Speaker 1: not asking the wrong questions or I think one of

654
00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:48,520
Speaker 1: the things that comes up quite a lot is when

655
00:30:48,560 --> 00:30:50,560
Speaker 1: you first come out, people are like, oh, but we

656
00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:52,720
Speaker 1: were mates. Are you attracted to me now? As if

657
00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 1: like every human is also I'm like, girls and guys

658
00:30:55,680 --> 00:30:57,920
Speaker 1: can be friends and not like sleeping together. So why

659
00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:00,320
Speaker 1: is it suddenly like you guys are hitting on you

660
00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:02,920
Speaker 1: know what I mean. But I think if there's no

661
00:31:03,360 --> 00:31:06,600
Speaker 1: malicious intention. You know, even Danny was saying the other day,

662
00:31:06,680 --> 00:31:10,600
Speaker 1: like people, you know, they even mess up their own pronouns. Now,

663
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:12,880
Speaker 1: you know, let's say He's like, as long as everyone's

664
00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 1: trying to learn, And I think you guys have probably

665
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,360
Speaker 1: seen people maybe be a bit awkward at the beginning

666
00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:20,400
Speaker 1: and not know what to do, but slowly, slowly you've

667
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:22,760
Speaker 1: helped normalize it as well for a lot of people

668
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:23,680
Speaker 1: in your community.

669
00:31:23,760 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's y.

670
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:28,440
Speaker 3: I try and educacate myself, like looking at pages like Danny's,

671
00:31:28,600 --> 00:31:30,280
Speaker 3: and I don't want to get it wrong, you know,

672
00:31:30,360 --> 00:31:32,240
Speaker 3: I don't want to get you know, you're in fear,

673
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:34,760
Speaker 3: and now I understand what people would be would have

674
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:38,000
Speaker 3: been like for us, you know, like talking about our

675
00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:39,560
Speaker 3: relationship earlier on that they.

676
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:40,920
Speaker 2: Were in fear of offending us.

677
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:44,000
Speaker 3: Like I'm not offended by any word you know that

678
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:47,160
Speaker 3: anyone accidentally uses if it's coming from you know, a

679
00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:51,000
Speaker 3: good place for their intentions to offend or hurt someone.

680
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:54,880
Speaker 3: But yeah, it's back then too, they didn't have social media.

681
00:31:54,920 --> 00:31:57,880
Speaker 3: People like to be able to go, oh, I'll reference

682
00:31:57,920 --> 00:31:59,880
Speaker 3: back to them. They've got a good explanation of what

683
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:03,520
Speaker 3: a pronoun is or yeah, I was totally you.

684
00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:04,400
Speaker 2: Know, an old man.

685
00:32:04,720 --> 00:32:08,080
Speaker 3: You know, I do not understand this, and now I

686
00:32:08,120 --> 00:32:08,880
Speaker 3: totally get it.

687
00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:09,880
Speaker 2: You know I get it.

688
00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:11,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, andper important.

689
00:32:11,760 --> 00:32:15,719
Speaker 1: So well, going back to gay time, which anyone who

690
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 1: is listening who doesn't know, I think I've spoken about

691
00:32:17,720 --> 00:32:19,520
Speaker 1: this with a couple of people before, but all of

692
00:32:19,520 --> 00:32:22,560
Speaker 1: my gay friends have this, like let's move in, get

693
00:32:22,600 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 1: married and have babies in like an eleven and a

694
00:32:24,560 --> 00:32:28,360
Speaker 1: half month period very quickly. I don't know what it is.

695
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:30,320
Speaker 1: Is it efficiency? I don't know what it is. I

696
00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 1: absolutely love it, though, like it's it's it's not even

697
00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:37,320
Speaker 1: a stereotype. It's just like a universal experience. So you

698
00:32:37,360 --> 00:32:40,080
Speaker 1: guys obviously moved in together really quickly. Tell us your

699
00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:42,280
Speaker 1: love story. How did you meet? I heard it was

700
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:45,440
Speaker 1: in Tazzi when you were both working at quantas well.

701
00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:47,360
Speaker 3: I wasn't actually working in quantas it was something I'd

702
00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:50,120
Speaker 3: always wanted to do. Michael had already been there. He

703
00:32:50,280 --> 00:32:53,960
Speaker 3: started work in Mildura with Quantas got transferred to Lonceston

704
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:58,120
Speaker 3: in Tazzy. He was down in Hobart. I just moved

705
00:32:58,160 --> 00:33:00,760
Speaker 3: back from Sydney. I've been living in and I'd moved

706
00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:04,560
Speaker 3: back to Hobart and I knew he was a flight attendant.

707
00:33:04,560 --> 00:33:06,040
Speaker 3: I met him out and I knew he was a

708
00:33:06,080 --> 00:33:08,240
Speaker 3: flight attendant. I was like, that's something I've always wanted

709
00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:10,040
Speaker 3: to do. It's a bit gay, but.

710
00:33:11,760 --> 00:33:14,160
Speaker 2: I really wanted to be on Like it's.

711
00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:15,880
Speaker 1: A self fulfilling prophecy.

712
00:33:16,480 --> 00:33:19,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, asked him a lot of questions about that. That's

713
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:21,800
Speaker 3: where a conversation I think sort of struck up. And

714
00:33:21,840 --> 00:33:23,960
Speaker 3: then he's like, oh, give me a number. I'll send you,

715
00:33:23,960 --> 00:33:27,040
Speaker 3: you know, some information of people I know in recruitment

716
00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:29,320
Speaker 3: and the process. You know, it's a pretty full on

717
00:33:29,440 --> 00:33:31,880
Speaker 3: process to be a flight attendant. You know, you go

718
00:33:31,920 --> 00:33:35,280
Speaker 3: through several interview stages and what they're looking for, and

719
00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:38,240
Speaker 3: you know, maybe get a bit of hospitality experience. Because

720
00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 3: at that time I hadn't. I'd worked in supermarket and

721
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:44,160
Speaker 3: you know, I was a lot younger, so what else.

722
00:33:46,160 --> 00:33:48,360
Speaker 2: Financial services and so forth? But I hadn't.

723
00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:50,000
Speaker 1: Were you on the plane at this conversation?

724
00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:52,760
Speaker 2: No? No, No, this was in this is Danvin Hobert.

725
00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:56,320
Speaker 1: No, that would have been so cute, and you're like, hey,

726
00:33:57,640 --> 00:33:59,920
Speaker 1: he just like slipped in number on a serviette under A.

727
00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:04,320
Speaker 2: Yeah.

728
00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:06,720
Speaker 3: So then yeah, so we just struck up a friendship,

729
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:09,160
Speaker 3: I think very early on, and you know, at every

730
00:34:09,239 --> 00:34:11,919
Speaker 3: sort of opportunity Michael to come down to Hobart it's

731
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:13,640
Speaker 3: like two and a half hours or two hour drive,

732
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:14,640
Speaker 3: or I'd go up.

733
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:16,040
Speaker 2: To Lone System on days off.

734
00:34:16,320 --> 00:34:18,160
Speaker 3: So yeah, it sort of progressed from there, but it

735
00:34:18,200 --> 00:34:22,520
Speaker 3: progressed very fast in intense if Michael, look, I would

736
00:34:22,560 --> 00:34:24,960
Speaker 3: never never move a state for somebody in such a

737
00:34:24,960 --> 00:34:27,960
Speaker 3: short period of time, but A it felt right, and

738
00:34:28,040 --> 00:34:30,480
Speaker 3: B Michael had no choice. He'd got a transfer to

739
00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:33,480
Speaker 3: what he'd always wanted, which was mainline Quantas. So that was,

740
00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:36,120
Speaker 3: you know, moving to Melbourne. That's what that looked like

741
00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:37,560
Speaker 3: for him. And we sort of knew that when I

742
00:34:37,600 --> 00:34:39,680
Speaker 3: met him, because one day I'll hopefully live in Melbourne

743
00:34:39,680 --> 00:34:43,040
Speaker 3: and were working for in the larger aircraft. I just thought, well,

744
00:34:43,120 --> 00:34:45,440
Speaker 3: fuck it, why not, like I've got nothing to lose,

745
00:34:46,040 --> 00:34:47,839
Speaker 3: just pack my things that way and come back home

746
00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:48,960
Speaker 3: you know, the other way.

747
00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:51,080
Speaker 2: And come back home against But I think what you

748
00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:53,040
Speaker 2: said a moment ago, it just felt right. You know,

749
00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:56,040
Speaker 2: people talk about that that love at first sight, and

750
00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:58,200
Speaker 2: I'm not sure if it was love at first sight,

751
00:34:58,239 --> 00:34:59,840
Speaker 2: but it just felt right, you know, like it was

752
00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:04,879
Speaker 2: comfortable and connections that was you know, yeah, just very

753
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:06,400
Speaker 2: very safe.

754
00:35:06,880 --> 00:35:08,799
Speaker 3: You know, we both sort of wanted the same thing,

755
00:35:09,120 --> 00:35:11,640
Speaker 3: you know, like in the conversations that we had. We

756
00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:15,200
Speaker 3: were from different but similar backgrounds like our families, but

757
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:17,080
Speaker 3: you know, very similar.

758
00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:21,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, just you know, honest people, working class, work hard,

759
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:24,439
Speaker 2: you know, treat people well. Just just both had that

760
00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:28,600
Speaker 2: that those common values and goals and our interests at

761
00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:31,080
Speaker 2: the time or still is you know, like in cars.

762
00:35:31,120 --> 00:35:34,560
Speaker 3: We both like vehicles, and.

763
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:41,560
Speaker 1: We both like transports and audio. I also heard that

764
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:43,879
Speaker 1: you even spoke about having kids on your first day,

765
00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:44,800
Speaker 1: like really early.

766
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:47,839
Speaker 3: Yeah, it wasn't more of a like you know, like

767
00:35:48,239 --> 00:35:51,040
Speaker 3: with each other right now. It was just more about

768
00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:52,839
Speaker 3: you know, where do you see yourself, you know, as

769
00:35:52,880 --> 00:35:55,439
Speaker 3: a as a gay man? Back then when I don't

770
00:35:55,440 --> 00:35:57,400
Speaker 3: think we would have even said to each other as

771
00:35:57,440 --> 00:35:57,879
Speaker 3: a gay man.

772
00:35:57,840 --> 00:35:58,480
Speaker 2: Because we wouldn't.

773
00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:01,279
Speaker 3: I don't know, you didn't even talk about it, you know,

774
00:36:01,440 --> 00:36:03,440
Speaker 3: like it's such a different.

775
00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:06,239
Speaker 2: Time that it was more in the context of I've

776
00:36:06,280 --> 00:36:09,880
Speaker 2: always wanted one to be a dad, yeah, you know,

777
00:36:09,960 --> 00:36:13,759
Speaker 2: and meeting Jared was like, wow, oh you wanted that

778
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:16,600
Speaker 2: as well, Like, you know, that's something I didn't know

779
00:36:16,719 --> 00:36:19,960
Speaker 2: I could feel anymore because obviously I'm gay.

780
00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:22,840
Speaker 3: But that's okay to feel that you want to be

781
00:36:22,840 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 3: a parent, you know, you want that yearning that you know,

782
00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:28,120
Speaker 3: people say that, you know, women have a lot of

783
00:36:28,239 --> 00:36:31,160
Speaker 3: sort of feelings that they not feel not complete until

784
00:36:31,160 --> 00:36:34,160
Speaker 3: they have a tilble. Some men maybe maybe it's that

785
00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:37,120
Speaker 3: we feel that way sometimes too. But it wasn't that

786
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:39,400
Speaker 3: we were going, oh, we're going to have a baby,

787
00:36:39,520 --> 00:36:40,600
Speaker 3: or let's try and do this.

788
00:36:40,800 --> 00:36:42,480
Speaker 2: It was more like, oh, you have that feeling too.

789
00:36:42,560 --> 00:36:44,640
Speaker 2: I have that feeling. Yeah, you know. It wasn't one

790
00:36:44,719 --> 00:36:47,320
Speaker 2: day you know, maybe this this, this will be possible

791
00:36:47,320 --> 00:36:49,760
Speaker 2: for us, you know in some way, shape or form.

792
00:36:49,760 --> 00:36:53,680
Speaker 2: Probably back then it was more maybe not that's true,

793
00:36:53,719 --> 00:36:57,040
Speaker 2: but we had a lot to explore and learn and

794
00:36:57,080 --> 00:36:58,160
Speaker 2: we're on the same page with it.

795
00:36:58,280 --> 00:37:02,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, before we continue, you all know, I like to

796
00:37:02,719 --> 00:37:06,520
Speaker 1: jam pack my schedule and overdo it sometimes, so anything

797
00:37:06,560 --> 00:37:10,000
Speaker 1: that saves time, energy, or adds convenience to our daily

798
00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:13,120
Speaker 1: life is a huge da in my books. That makes

799
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:15,759
Speaker 1: me so grateful toliver in a time where things like

800
00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:19,520
Speaker 1: wool Words Delivery Unlimited exist, and the subscription has just

801
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:23,680
Speaker 1: undergone some very exciting improvements so we subscribers can reap

802
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:27,920
Speaker 1: more benefits than ever. Delivery Unlimited is the amazing Warworth

803
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:31,160
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804
00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:34,719
Speaker 1: month or annual subscription, and now you can shop more

805
00:37:34,760 --> 00:37:39,000
Speaker 1: often with a lower subscription fee and collect additional everyday

806
00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:43,040
Speaker 1: rewards points for even more savings. Customers will continue to

807
00:37:43,080 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 1: have access to ten dollars delivery now for deliveries under

808
00:37:46,640 --> 00:37:50,160
Speaker 1: two hours, but now the minimum spend for free same

809
00:37:50,239 --> 00:37:53,520
Speaker 1: day or next day delivery has been halved to fifty dollars.

810
00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:57,320
Speaker 1: Subscription fees have been slashed, and you get two times

811
00:37:57,360 --> 00:38:01,319
Speaker 1: the everyday rewards points on every online shop. For as

812
00:38:01,360 --> 00:38:04,879
Speaker 1: little as fifteen dollars a month, you can enjoy unlimited

813
00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:08,520
Speaker 1: deliveries and the n ATA of draining grocery troops will

814
00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:11,479
Speaker 1: be knocked over forever. I'll pop the link in show

815
00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:17,360
Speaker 1: notes now, well, I'm so so excited to jump into

816
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:20,440
Speaker 1: the process of nine years later finally welcoming your beautiful

817
00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:22,560
Speaker 1: sun read into the world, because again I think it's

818
00:38:22,560 --> 00:38:25,920
Speaker 1: something a lot of couples don't see as possible or workable.

819
00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:28,719
Speaker 1: And also, you guys have really shown that you can

820
00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:31,520
Speaker 1: have a beautiful family life and a beautiful community around you,

821
00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:34,200
Speaker 1: and that read doesn't suffer for any kind of discrimination

822
00:38:34,600 --> 00:38:36,960
Speaker 1: or you know, missing out. I think that's really really

823
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:40,320
Speaker 1: beautiful and powerful. But first, I have one gay question

824
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:42,480
Speaker 1: for you guys. I have another one later, but one

825
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:45,279
Speaker 1: is have you ever been off on your gata and

826
00:38:45,360 --> 00:38:47,360
Speaker 1: accidentally hit on a straight man? Because I'm like, is

827
00:38:47,360 --> 00:38:50,239
Speaker 1: there a code? Like how do you guys know? Do

828
00:38:50,280 --> 00:38:53,359
Speaker 1: you ever get it wrong? Or is your gaita just on?

829
00:38:53,480 --> 00:38:56,759
Speaker 3: No, Look, I don't think i've ever no, no, no, no,

830
00:38:57,040 --> 00:38:57,919
Speaker 3: I've never got it wrong.

831
00:38:58,560 --> 00:39:01,480
Speaker 2: Of course you get you know, girlfriend ringing. You're going like,

832
00:39:01,880 --> 00:39:02,799
Speaker 2: did you see him at the time?

833
00:39:02,840 --> 00:39:05,319
Speaker 3: Do you think he's going Like, I don't have that

834
00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:07,680
Speaker 3: type of I'm like, I have no idea. Like I

835
00:39:07,719 --> 00:39:09,840
Speaker 3: didn't even know I was when I was young. You know,

836
00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:12,279
Speaker 3: I had so I didn't know I was. You know,

837
00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:15,000
Speaker 3: Oh my god, you had girlfriends? Did you boy friends?

838
00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:15,319
Speaker 2: Yeah?

839
00:39:15,320 --> 00:39:18,520
Speaker 3: I had girlfriends before Michael didn't have girlfriends. I had girlfriends.

840
00:39:18,760 --> 00:39:22,640
Speaker 3: I was actually engaged to be married. Oh my god,

841
00:39:22,680 --> 00:39:23,440
Speaker 3: and you.

842
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:30,719
Speaker 1: Know kids already you have children? No wait, was it Nick,

843
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:32,120
Speaker 1: because that's also possible.

844
00:39:34,920 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 2: No good?

845
00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:39,319
Speaker 3: You know young, I moved out at home when I

846
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:43,680
Speaker 3: was seventeen, you know, like, which now is mind blowing

847
00:39:43,719 --> 00:39:45,920
Speaker 3: for you know, the thought of Read moving out of

848
00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:48,719
Speaker 3: home at seventeen, like I probably still won't let him

849
00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:50,080
Speaker 3: cross a busy road and it's a.

850
00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:55,960
Speaker 1: Dream, you know, without a suit engage.

851
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:56,720
Speaker 2: Which's hats and stopped to slow down.

852
00:39:56,560 --> 00:40:01,399
Speaker 1: Signs, which is a you know, bubbles socker like bubble socker,

853
00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:03,400
Speaker 1: I speak tubble meet you just like push Read to

854
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:04,040
Speaker 1: school in one.

855
00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:08,520
Speaker 3: Of those those it's when he starts taking himself to

856
00:40:08,560 --> 00:40:09,200
Speaker 3: school to wear it.

857
00:40:09,320 --> 00:40:10,200
Speaker 2: Oh my god.

858
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:14,640
Speaker 1: Okay, So from two thousand and one, fell in love,

859
00:40:14,920 --> 00:40:17,800
Speaker 1: moved in together very quickly after, but it took nine

860
00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:22,160
Speaker 1: years until twenty ten when your live changed forever. And

861
00:40:22,239 --> 00:40:25,600
Speaker 1: I think, not unlike adoption, if you don't have someone

862
00:40:25,719 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 1: in your network or even extended network, who's been involved

863
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:32,960
Speaker 1: in surrogacy, I don't think many people know the logistics

864
00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:35,680
Speaker 1: or know much about it. So as much as you're comfortable,

865
00:40:35,920 --> 00:40:37,640
Speaker 1: would you guys be happy to share a little bit

866
00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:40,120
Speaker 1: about how you found I mean, I think you guys

867
00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:43,200
Speaker 1: found out about it yourselves only through watching a TV show.

868
00:40:43,280 --> 00:40:46,640
Speaker 1: So how did you actually start the process. How long

869
00:40:46,680 --> 00:40:49,520
Speaker 1: did it take for anyone else who's interested in it?

870
00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:51,520
Speaker 1: You know, what are sort of the steps in that

871
00:40:51,640 --> 00:40:53,239
Speaker 1: landscape that led you to read?

872
00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:56,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, look, you're correct in saying that it was a

873
00:40:57,000 --> 00:41:00,000
Speaker 3: documentary on television that we saw of a same set

874
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:03,239
Speaker 3: couple and their journey that they had filmed in a

875
00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:07,560
Speaker 3: documentary style of going to America, you know, meeting surrogate's

876
00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:11,800
Speaker 3: agencies and right through to them actually holding their baby.

877
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:16,440
Speaker 3: And that was before you know, Instagram and all those things.

878
00:41:16,480 --> 00:41:18,759
Speaker 3: So it was on the television Facebook I think it

879
00:41:18,840 --> 00:41:21,359
Speaker 3: just started, or there was MySpace or one of those things.

880
00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:25,640
Speaker 1: THOMSN Messenger.

881
00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:27,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right, that's exactly right.

882
00:41:28,360 --> 00:41:31,359
Speaker 3: So we investigated these guys that did it and tried

883
00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:33,040
Speaker 3: to get in touch with them, and we did so

884
00:41:33,080 --> 00:41:35,479
Speaker 3: we were living in Perth at the time. We reached

885
00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:36,880
Speaker 3: out to them and they said, yeah, come over, come

886
00:41:36,880 --> 00:41:38,480
Speaker 3: over to our house. They lived in Sukilita. We went

887
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:42,560
Speaker 3: to the house and we saw firsthand, like a family

888
00:41:42,719 --> 00:41:45,239
Speaker 3: you know that was you know, I don't ever, like

889
00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:47,920
Speaker 3: use the word normal, but just like an average family,

890
00:41:48,040 --> 00:41:51,640
Speaker 3: you know, two loving parents and a child and living,

891
00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 3: you know, living their life. So they sort of, you know,

892
00:41:55,360 --> 00:41:58,719
Speaker 3: gave us the encouragement, I think, like seeing it that

893
00:41:58,840 --> 00:42:02,680
Speaker 3: it's achievable. So we just investigated what countries did it.

894
00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:05,840
Speaker 3: It was very, very expensive in America at the time

895
00:42:06,040 --> 00:42:09,239
Speaker 3: to do it, so we just started saving. We bought

896
00:42:09,239 --> 00:42:10,160
Speaker 3: investment properties.

897
00:42:10,239 --> 00:42:13,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, we had purchased an investment for a few years earlier,

898
00:42:13,560 --> 00:42:17,560
Speaker 2: so we had that sort of capital behind us to think, okay,

899
00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:19,880
Speaker 2: if we if we you know, really serious about this,

900
00:42:19,920 --> 00:42:24,040
Speaker 2: we'll sell that and raise the funds that are needed.

901
00:42:24,239 --> 00:42:27,920
Speaker 2: You know, unfortunately, with surrogacy, not unfortunately, it is a

902
00:42:27,960 --> 00:42:30,759
Speaker 2: commercial transaction at the end of the day that there

903
00:42:30,800 --> 00:42:33,120
Speaker 2: is money changing hands, so you've got to feel comfortable

904
00:42:33,120 --> 00:42:36,640
Speaker 2: with that. We did explore adoption, and you know, it

905
00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:41,840
Speaker 2: was just roadblock after roadblock. That's an incredibly arduous process. Yeah,

906
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:44,560
Speaker 2: but you know that really helped us also understand that

907
00:42:44,600 --> 00:42:49,319
Speaker 2: it's not about skin color, race, religion, you know, it's

908
00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:53,680
Speaker 2: just having a healthy child. So once we discovered that

909
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:57,759
Speaker 2: India was a country that was an option for it

910
00:42:57,760 --> 00:43:00,640
Speaker 2: was an option. Yeah, so as far as being to

911
00:43:00,840 --> 00:43:03,200
Speaker 2: afford the process. You know, it was not two hundred

912
00:43:03,239 --> 00:43:05,600
Speaker 2: thousand dollars as it wasn't in America. It was sort

913
00:43:05,640 --> 00:43:08,160
Speaker 2: of half that class. So it was something that we

914
00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:10,920
Speaker 2: were like, okay, this is this is something we can investigate.

915
00:43:11,239 --> 00:43:14,400
Speaker 2: But we then spent the next a few years investigating

916
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:17,200
Speaker 2: agencies in India. We just wanted to ensure that the

917
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:21,560
Speaker 2: agencies that we, you know, would finally sign up.

918
00:43:21,480 --> 00:43:24,840
Speaker 3: With were legitimate and they look after.

919
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:28,960
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, yeah that's right, not not taking advantage

920
00:43:29,000 --> 00:43:33,120
Speaker 2: of people or you know, their their situation. So it's

921
00:43:33,160 --> 00:43:36,840
Speaker 2: something that you know, we spoke to dozens of agencies

922
00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:38,719
Speaker 2: and you just get that vibe as this is just

923
00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:41,239
Speaker 2: all about money and that that's not it for us.

924
00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:43,799
Speaker 2: That's got to be more than that. So sorry. India

925
00:43:43,920 --> 00:43:47,319
Speaker 2: is the company that we built a rapport with for

926
00:43:47,440 --> 00:43:49,880
Speaker 2: about six months. I spoke to them just about every

927
00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:51,919
Speaker 2: day with a question what about this, and what about

928
00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:53,719
Speaker 2: this and what happened? This happens and what do you

929
00:43:53,760 --> 00:43:56,200
Speaker 2: do about this? And they were amazing and they're still

930
00:43:56,239 --> 00:43:58,840
Speaker 2: great friends and friends. We spoke to them like this week,

931
00:43:59,080 --> 00:44:02,440
Speaker 2: you know, incredible. The doctors there, it's run by two

932
00:44:02,520 --> 00:44:06,160
Speaker 2: doctors and just you know, we're loads of integrity and

933
00:44:06,360 --> 00:44:09,239
Speaker 2: wanting the best for the you know, intended parents and

934
00:44:09,640 --> 00:44:13,200
Speaker 2: their surrogate and everyone involved is you know, just treated

935
00:44:13,320 --> 00:44:16,960
Speaker 2: really beautifully. So yeah, but meeting these guys in Melbourne

936
00:44:16,960 --> 00:44:20,680
Speaker 2: was just very tangible, thinking wow, this, this, this can happen, this,

937
00:44:20,680 --> 00:44:22,439
Speaker 2: this is achievable.

938
00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:24,600
Speaker 3: And then you go through all those doubts going like, oh,

939
00:44:24,680 --> 00:44:26,319
Speaker 3: but when they go to school, are they going to

940
00:44:26,320 --> 00:44:28,919
Speaker 3: get bullied for having me and Michael as their dad?

941
00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:33,799
Speaker 3: And those were our bigger burning questions, like, you know,

942
00:44:33,840 --> 00:44:35,839
Speaker 3: we really want to bring a child into this earth,

943
00:44:35,920 --> 00:44:38,200
Speaker 3: but we also don't want to give it a bad life,

944
00:44:38,239 --> 00:44:41,120
Speaker 3: you know, like or challenges that are out of our control.

945
00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:45,000
Speaker 3: So we did have a lot of fears around that,

946
00:44:45,640 --> 00:44:48,319
Speaker 3: and ten years later, the least of our worries. So

947
00:44:48,360 --> 00:44:50,440
Speaker 3: they always say, you know, things that you worry about

948
00:44:50,520 --> 00:44:53,080
Speaker 3: are the things that you really don't worry about once

949
00:44:53,160 --> 00:44:54,319
Speaker 3: you know things happen.

950
00:44:54,440 --> 00:44:58,080
Speaker 2: So yeah, no, we haven't had one sort of amount

951
00:44:58,080 --> 00:45:02,839
Speaker 2: of discrimination or you know, dropping read off at kindergarten

952
00:45:03,000 --> 00:45:05,200
Speaker 2: and all his little kinder friends think it was the

953
00:45:05,200 --> 00:45:06,759
Speaker 2: coolest thing in the world. He had two dads because

954
00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:07,960
Speaker 2: Dad's more fun than mum was.

955
00:45:08,280 --> 00:45:14,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, Oh my god, that's so sweet, sweet, so lovely.

956
00:45:14,640 --> 00:45:18,080
Speaker 2: It's incredible to think that, you know, reads little kinder

957
00:45:18,080 --> 00:45:21,840
Speaker 2: buddies and school buddies, having gone to school with a

958
00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:24,240
Speaker 2: family with you know, same sex parents.

959
00:45:23,760 --> 00:45:26,920
Speaker 3: It's no biggie. You're still like and even now and

960
00:45:26,960 --> 00:45:30,080
Speaker 3: you still get questions like, especially now, we've got a

961
00:45:30,120 --> 00:45:31,680
Speaker 3: little baby in a praym and we're going to a

962
00:45:31,680 --> 00:45:34,160
Speaker 3: supermarket and I'll give him mom a break, or I'm

963
00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:35,640
Speaker 3: having arrest, you know, or.

964
00:45:35,680 --> 00:45:36,840
Speaker 2: Oh, you're a good dad, you know.

965
00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:41,560
Speaker 3: And you sort of choose your audience as to whether

966
00:45:41,600 --> 00:45:44,080
Speaker 3: you choose you want to educate them or And that's

967
00:45:44,120 --> 00:45:46,920
Speaker 3: just personally. I know a lot of people that have

968
00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:49,400
Speaker 3: spoken to especially online, they're like, you know, this happened

969
00:45:49,440 --> 00:45:51,160
Speaker 3: to me today. So I went off at them, and

970
00:45:51,200 --> 00:45:53,919
Speaker 3: I'm like, that's your lot. It's just not my lot.

971
00:45:54,040 --> 00:45:54,239
Speaker 2: You know.

972
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:59,040
Speaker 3: It's an older gentleman, you know, and he's in the

973
00:45:59,120 --> 00:46:01,920
Speaker 3: kindness of his heart, he's saying, giving mama break. I

974
00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:04,160
Speaker 3: can just smile and walk away, you know, like I

975
00:46:04,320 --> 00:46:06,719
Speaker 3: just you know, smile and acknowledge that he's spoken and

976
00:46:06,880 --> 00:46:10,920
Speaker 3: walk away, you know. Whereas it's someone that's I feel

977
00:46:11,600 --> 00:46:12,480
Speaker 3: needs to know.

978
00:46:12,800 --> 00:46:13,919
Speaker 2: You know, I will go, oh.

979
00:46:13,840 --> 00:46:16,000
Speaker 3: He's actually got two dads? Or where he with this

980
00:46:16,040 --> 00:46:18,040
Speaker 3: particular child that we've got the moment where.

981
00:46:18,080 --> 00:46:25,080
Speaker 1: Where the real dad's have not. You guys are the

982
00:46:25,200 --> 00:46:30,120
Speaker 1: least likely to ever use that sentience ever. But I

983
00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:32,239
Speaker 1: think that's a good point as well. I think in

984
00:46:32,320 --> 00:46:37,920
Speaker 1: anything where difference or uniqueness draws questions or curiosity is

985
00:46:37,960 --> 00:46:40,040
Speaker 1: to just really distinguish between the ones that come from

986
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:42,839
Speaker 1: a good place and out of genuine interest and like

987
00:46:42,920 --> 00:46:45,239
Speaker 1: wanting to understand better, or people who are doing it

988
00:46:45,280 --> 00:46:47,160
Speaker 1: out of a place of maliciousness. And you can't fight

989
00:46:47,200 --> 00:46:49,520
Speaker 1: every battle, like you'll just be so bloody exhausted. So

990
00:46:49,560 --> 00:46:52,120
Speaker 1: I love that idea of like some people, it's not

991
00:46:52,120 --> 00:46:54,640
Speaker 1: coming from a bad place. I've got limited hours of

992
00:46:54,640 --> 00:46:56,080
Speaker 1: the day. I just got to leave that one. You

993
00:46:56,120 --> 00:46:58,279
Speaker 1: don't have to educate every single person that comes on

994
00:46:58,280 --> 00:46:59,319
Speaker 1: your doorstep, like.

995
00:46:59,520 --> 00:47:02,680
Speaker 3: I think that's who we are too, especially having a

996
00:47:02,719 --> 00:47:03,800
Speaker 3: social media account.

997
00:47:04,080 --> 00:47:05,640
Speaker 2: I'm not here to educate anyone.

998
00:47:06,040 --> 00:47:06,200
Speaker 3: Like.

999
00:47:06,520 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 2: We pick our battles.

1000
00:47:07,520 --> 00:47:10,719
Speaker 3: You know, we're showing what our life is and you

1001
00:47:10,960 --> 00:47:12,799
Speaker 3: translate that to how you want to.

1002
00:47:12,960 --> 00:47:14,440
Speaker 2: That's fine, That's totally up to you.

1003
00:47:14,560 --> 00:47:16,239
Speaker 1: Did you get to be there when Reid was born?

1004
00:47:16,280 --> 00:47:17,320
Speaker 1: I think it goes to his going.

1005
00:47:17,280 --> 00:47:21,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely, we were actually outside the operating theater he

1006
00:47:21,280 --> 00:47:24,400
Speaker 2: was born, and he was in our arms when he

1007
00:47:24,520 --> 00:47:25,520
Speaker 2: was two minutes old.

1008
00:47:25,840 --> 00:47:27,920
Speaker 3: Still even that, like even when you said we were

1009
00:47:27,960 --> 00:47:30,600
Speaker 3: standing outside, I still can hear, like we were standing

1010
00:47:30,640 --> 00:47:35,680
Speaker 3: outside this door and the birthing suite and they're all cesareans,

1011
00:47:35,840 --> 00:47:38,160
Speaker 3: So it's scheduled, you know what time it's going to be.

1012
00:47:38,200 --> 00:47:40,000
Speaker 2: It's going to be on this day, and read was

1013
00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:42,680
Speaker 2: early because they were a bit unsure about sort of

1014
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:45,360
Speaker 2: health concerns. Whilst he was still inside.

1015
00:47:45,920 --> 00:47:48,600
Speaker 3: Were standing outside that door and had like as a

1016
00:47:48,760 --> 00:47:51,799
Speaker 3: school swinging door, and because we were allowed actually in there,

1017
00:47:51,800 --> 00:47:53,600
Speaker 3: we could see like curtains around, like you could see

1018
00:47:53,640 --> 00:47:56,279
Speaker 3: through the little glass the curtains around. We're like, that's

1019
00:47:56,280 --> 00:47:58,880
Speaker 3: where our surrogut is in there. But the squeak of

1020
00:47:58,920 --> 00:48:00,799
Speaker 3: the door, like when you said that, instantly, I just

1021
00:48:00,840 --> 00:48:04,400
Speaker 3: remember that sound like I'm sweating. And they're looking at

1022
00:48:04,400 --> 00:48:06,680
Speaker 3: each other with this like anxious eyes because you're just

1023
00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:10,479
Speaker 3: also like any parent on that at that date, you're

1024
00:48:10,600 --> 00:48:13,520
Speaker 3: overwhelmed with emotion that you know this is actually happening.

1025
00:48:13,520 --> 00:48:15,279
Speaker 3: But you're like, I hope he's safe. I hope he's

1026
00:48:15,320 --> 00:48:16,880
Speaker 3: healthier or he We didn't know if it was a

1027
00:48:16,920 --> 00:48:17,719
Speaker 3: he orshit at the time.

1028
00:48:17,800 --> 00:48:19,480
Speaker 1: Oh, you didn't know.

1029
00:48:20,120 --> 00:48:23,120
Speaker 2: You're not to know in India. Yeah, I mean more

1030
00:48:23,160 --> 00:48:27,040
Speaker 2: of a cultural reason for India that you're not you

1031
00:48:27,040 --> 00:48:29,239
Speaker 2: don't know the sex of the child, which is good

1032
00:48:29,280 --> 00:48:30,040
Speaker 2: for a couple of control.

1033
00:48:30,080 --> 00:48:32,480
Speaker 3: For it's really good to have something that's out of.

1034
00:48:32,480 --> 00:48:35,840
Speaker 2: Out control the general reveal businesses in India though.

1035
00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:39,560
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, oh my god. I mean your mum had

1036
00:48:39,600 --> 00:48:44,080
Speaker 1: the balloon years ago ready to go, so oh my gosh,

1037
00:48:44,080 --> 00:48:46,000
Speaker 1: so you had him straight away, and then how.

1038
00:48:46,080 --> 00:48:48,440
Speaker 3: They had the baby to you know, you have a

1039
00:48:48,480 --> 00:48:50,560
Speaker 3: few moments and then they take the baby way to

1040
00:48:50,600 --> 00:48:54,040
Speaker 3: do some testing obviously to make sure there's no health concerns.

1041
00:48:54,200 --> 00:48:58,400
Speaker 3: You're given just basically a large hospital room with we

1042
00:48:58,480 --> 00:49:01,160
Speaker 3: had it with two beds, will bring the baby up shortly,

1043
00:49:01,440 --> 00:49:03,839
Speaker 3: and that's where we stayed for three days with our

1044
00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:04,320
Speaker 3: new baby.

1045
00:49:04,360 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 2: So they it was the most surreal experience. You know,

1046
00:49:07,640 --> 00:49:10,040
Speaker 2: there's I will live him in your little little crib

1047
00:49:10,080 --> 00:49:11,399
Speaker 2: and they're like, you know, what what do you want

1048
00:49:11,400 --> 00:49:12,840
Speaker 2: to how can we help you out. We're like, no,

1049
00:49:13,160 --> 00:49:15,040
Speaker 2: we're good, We're fine, and.

1050
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:18,160
Speaker 3: The like change and that like we're good. You know.

1051
00:49:18,280 --> 00:49:20,920
Speaker 2: So those those first three days where we were just

1052
00:49:21,719 --> 00:49:24,759
Speaker 2: with him and each other twenty four to seven, like

1053
00:49:24,840 --> 00:49:28,920
Speaker 2: it was so special just without also you know, being

1054
00:49:28,920 --> 00:49:30,920
Speaker 2: away obviously, you know, being away from your loved ones

1055
00:49:30,960 --> 00:49:33,239
Speaker 2: and family and friends and being able to introduce him,

1056
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:35,759
Speaker 2: but it also was such an amazing time just to

1057
00:49:35,760 --> 00:49:41,600
Speaker 2: connect and without any interruption, no pressure about seeing.

1058
00:49:42,040 --> 00:49:44,640
Speaker 3: Anybody or you know, it was Yeah, we stayed in

1059
00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:47,160
Speaker 3: our vajamas in a you know, in a room with him,

1060
00:49:47,719 --> 00:49:58,839
Speaker 3: and I took so many photos and.

1061
00:49:54,880 --> 00:49:56,040
Speaker 2: Oh, look at him, look at him.

1062
00:49:56,040 --> 00:49:57,879
Speaker 3: Oh he's doing this, he's doing that, he's doing nothing.

1063
00:49:57,960 --> 00:49:58,880
Speaker 1: Yeah he was blinking.

1064
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:00,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly what miracle.

1065
00:50:02,080 --> 00:50:04,920
Speaker 1: Oh he's so gifted. Should we put him in an

1066
00:50:04,920 --> 00:50:11,920
Speaker 1: accelerated baby? But read is actually gifted though, Like what

1067
00:50:12,040 --> 00:50:15,640
Speaker 1: a talented little human. He started his own business. Like

1068
00:50:16,040 --> 00:50:18,440
Speaker 1: if there was ever a concern, and I can totally

1069
00:50:18,480 --> 00:50:20,480
Speaker 1: understand why it would have been a fear that he

1070
00:50:20,520 --> 00:50:23,400
Speaker 1: would end up being subject to discrimination or challenge or

1071
00:50:23,440 --> 00:50:25,560
Speaker 1: just difference in school, but I feel like he's one

1072
00:50:25,560 --> 00:50:28,120
Speaker 1: of the most well adjusted children I have ever met, like,

1073
00:50:28,560 --> 00:50:32,200
Speaker 1: started his own kindness business in Lockdown, does his own

1074
00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:36,120
Speaker 1: art project like a little legend blows me away, a

1075
00:50:37,280 --> 00:50:37,960
Speaker 1: lot of crafts.

1076
00:50:38,520 --> 00:50:42,200
Speaker 2: He's very creative, that's for sure. I think you mentioned

1077
00:50:42,480 --> 00:50:46,360
Speaker 2: before just about not being discriminated against and being very reassured.

1078
00:50:46,360 --> 00:50:49,080
Speaker 2: He's just very safe in he's I was not safe,

1079
00:50:49,239 --> 00:50:51,480
Speaker 2: very comfortable in his own compkin.

1080
00:50:51,680 --> 00:50:53,800
Speaker 3: When Read was born. There's never any secrets.

1081
00:50:53,840 --> 00:50:57,400
Speaker 2: There have never been a secret about how he was born.

1082
00:50:57,760 --> 00:51:01,000
Speaker 2: He has a photo of Arch and it by his bed.

1083
00:51:01,640 --> 00:51:06,919
Speaker 2: It's the journey has always been very transparent. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

1084
00:51:07,200 --> 00:51:09,200
Speaker 2: he's an egg Downer. And I think I had that

1085
00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:11,399
Speaker 2: conversation with you as well, Sarah, like.

1086
00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:14,160
Speaker 3: Your you know, your your background, where you you know

1087
00:51:14,200 --> 00:51:16,880
Speaker 3: how you became. If it's no secret, it's not like

1088
00:51:17,320 --> 00:51:19,480
Speaker 3: something that needs to be a discussion now because some

1089
00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:21,359
Speaker 3: people like when did you tell him? And I'm like, well,

1090
00:51:21,719 --> 00:51:23,799
Speaker 3: you always always knew, and now we're talked to him

1091
00:51:23,800 --> 00:51:26,799
Speaker 3: about that, you know, going, do you remember when I

1092
00:51:26,840 --> 00:51:27,440
Speaker 3: told you he's.

1093
00:51:27,800 --> 00:51:30,120
Speaker 2: No Well, which is true because I did. We didn't

1094
00:51:30,120 --> 00:51:30,440
Speaker 2: tell him.

1095
00:51:30,480 --> 00:51:33,560
Speaker 3: It's just always had been quite open about.

1096
00:51:32,920 --> 00:51:33,880
Speaker 2: Everything, you know.

1097
00:51:33,960 --> 00:51:35,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, that was my next question for you guys, was like,

1098
00:51:36,120 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 1: the question I get all the time is when did

1099
00:51:37,640 --> 00:51:40,600
Speaker 1: you find out? But I think firstly, everyone in cross

1100
00:51:40,600 --> 00:51:43,560
Speaker 1: cultural situations like this, it's kind of obvious that, like,

1101
00:51:44,160 --> 00:51:46,800
Speaker 1: your child is Indian and you guys are Caucasian. I'm

1102
00:51:47,040 --> 00:51:49,200
Speaker 1: like fully blown Asian. My parents were Caucasian. It's not

1103
00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:51,440
Speaker 1: a situation where you can hide it till you're eighteen.

1104
00:51:54,040 --> 00:51:57,720
Speaker 1: But I think that is something that's transferable to all parents,

1105
00:51:57,920 --> 00:52:02,359
Speaker 1: is that children are really with information, and the more

1106
00:52:02,400 --> 00:52:04,359
Speaker 1: that you make it not a big deal, the less

1107
00:52:04,360 --> 00:52:06,560
Speaker 1: a big deal it becomes. It's never been a complex

1108
00:52:06,560 --> 00:52:09,359
Speaker 1: for me. It's never been weird because I knew about

1109
00:52:09,400 --> 00:52:11,479
Speaker 1: adoption before I knew about what it meant. It wasn't

1110
00:52:11,520 --> 00:52:13,560
Speaker 1: like find out about it, then get told and then

1111
00:52:13,640 --> 00:52:17,040
Speaker 1: go my identity. It's just part of your story. And

1112
00:52:17,120 --> 00:52:18,920
Speaker 1: I love that you guys have been so open with

1113
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:21,600
Speaker 1: Read because he just seems to not be hung up

1114
00:52:21,640 --> 00:52:24,200
Speaker 1: on it because of that, because it was never a secret.

1115
00:52:24,320 --> 00:52:26,239
Speaker 2: I think it's just yeah, it was always going to

1116
00:52:26,480 --> 00:52:29,400
Speaker 2: like we're always like that, yeah, And we're really proud

1117
00:52:29,440 --> 00:52:32,759
Speaker 2: of how you know, the journey of sorry, So we're

1118
00:52:32,760 --> 00:52:34,680
Speaker 2: really proud of India as a country.

1119
00:52:34,719 --> 00:52:37,200
Speaker 3: For allowing us to be parents.

1120
00:52:36,880 --> 00:52:39,040
Speaker 2: To be parents. Yeah, like we owe them, you know,

1121
00:52:39,200 --> 00:52:42,319
Speaker 2: a lot. It's it's a real privilege. So you know,

1122
00:52:42,320 --> 00:52:46,240
Speaker 2: we'd love his skin color. We love his big deep

1123
00:52:46,320 --> 00:52:47,479
Speaker 2: brown eyes, you know, like.

1124
00:52:47,560 --> 00:52:48,719
Speaker 1: His eyes are beautiful.

1125
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:52,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, super proud of him. And yeah, he's a really

1126
00:52:52,680 --> 00:52:53,040
Speaker 2: good kid.

1127
00:52:53,080 --> 00:52:55,279
Speaker 1: He's such a good kind of obsessed with him. He's

1128
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:57,480
Speaker 1: just got such a bright future ahead. Oh my god,

1129
00:52:57,480 --> 00:53:02,279
Speaker 1: those tap dancers. Something that I also think is really

1130
00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:04,920
Speaker 1: interesting about you guys is that often people think in

1131
00:53:05,000 --> 00:53:07,640
Speaker 1: the journey of parenthood, you know, mums changed their careers

1132
00:53:07,680 --> 00:53:10,080
Speaker 1: and mums become stay at home mums or mums you know,

1133
00:53:10,200 --> 00:53:13,200
Speaker 1: sacrifice blah blah blah. But you guys both also had

1134
00:53:13,239 --> 00:53:15,880
Speaker 1: really big identity changes around that, like Jared becoming a

1135
00:53:15,880 --> 00:53:19,280
Speaker 1: stay at home dad, Michael shifting into a totally different

1136
00:53:19,320 --> 00:53:22,600
Speaker 1: sector to be at home more. Like those big kind

1137
00:53:22,640 --> 00:53:25,480
Speaker 1: of career or lifestyle pivots are also a really big

1138
00:53:25,520 --> 00:53:28,000
Speaker 1: theme of over the past eighteen months to two years.

1139
00:53:28,400 --> 00:53:30,680
Speaker 1: Do you guys have any words for people listening on

1140
00:53:30,840 --> 00:53:33,960
Speaker 1: rebuilding your identity when like your titles change or your

1141
00:53:33,960 --> 00:53:35,920
Speaker 1: place kind of in the world changes.

1142
00:53:35,800 --> 00:53:40,319
Speaker 2: You haven't rebuilt my identity understoodn't know what I'm going

1143
00:53:40,360 --> 00:53:41,000
Speaker 2: to be to grow up.

1144
00:53:41,040 --> 00:53:43,799
Speaker 3: But nice to add to this because I think you

1145
00:53:43,880 --> 00:53:45,120
Speaker 3: went through Yeah.

1146
00:53:45,239 --> 00:53:48,400
Speaker 2: Look, I was at that quantas for eighteen years and

1147
00:53:48,440 --> 00:53:51,200
Speaker 2: you wanted to be home more. I was away fifty

1148
00:53:51,239 --> 00:53:55,680
Speaker 2: percent of every month, and you know, you only watched

1149
00:53:55,719 --> 00:53:57,920
Speaker 2: your child grow up once. And I felt that I

1150
00:53:58,000 --> 00:54:02,160
Speaker 2: was not there enough and I needed to be. You know,

1151
00:54:02,200 --> 00:54:05,799
Speaker 2: making that decision to leave was tricky. It came at

1152
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:09,920
Speaker 2: a time where quantuss offering redundancies, so it was a

1153
00:54:09,960 --> 00:54:13,080
Speaker 2: bit of an incentive to take the money and go

1154
00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:14,440
Speaker 2: and try something new, and we.

1155
00:54:14,440 --> 00:54:16,680
Speaker 3: Both took it at the same time. The redundancies came

1156
00:54:16,760 --> 00:54:19,160
Speaker 3: up and we're like, I'd been there ten years, mark

1157
00:54:19,239 --> 00:54:22,000
Speaker 3: or at eighteen, and we were like, oh, and I

1158
00:54:22,040 --> 00:54:24,600
Speaker 3: was because I was off stay home Dad, Like, because

1159
00:54:24,640 --> 00:54:25,200
Speaker 3: I got leave.

1160
00:54:25,320 --> 00:54:27,279
Speaker 1: You guys got twelve weeks of potentially leave.

1161
00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:32,360
Speaker 3: I've got no, I got two years. The policy change

1162
00:54:32,360 --> 00:54:34,840
Speaker 3: whilst we were at quantisance, you know, us as the

1163
00:54:34,880 --> 00:54:38,920
Speaker 3: same sex couple that were in the same job, they

1164
00:54:38,920 --> 00:54:41,200
Speaker 3: had to look at their policies and procedures and they

1165
00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:44,440
Speaker 3: had to make changes to go well, oh on to end,

1166
00:54:44,560 --> 00:54:47,000
Speaker 3: you know, there's a potnity and maternity.

1167
00:54:46,640 --> 00:54:48,520
Speaker 2: Leave, like we need to make this more there.

1168
00:54:48,640 --> 00:54:51,960
Speaker 3: So they were very a very fair employer and honored

1169
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:54,680
Speaker 3: me two years off, securing my job that I could

1170
00:54:54,760 --> 00:54:58,080
Speaker 3: go back to. But in the shortly after that time,

1171
00:54:58,120 --> 00:55:00,799
Speaker 3: I did go back for a little bit in part time.

1172
00:55:01,120 --> 00:55:04,000
Speaker 3: But again it was really hard juggling. You know, we

1173
00:55:04,040 --> 00:55:06,920
Speaker 3: had a new baby and we were raising that child.

1174
00:55:07,160 --> 00:55:09,960
Speaker 3: We weren't, you know, wanting a nanny or we weren't

1175
00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:13,040
Speaker 3: wanting childcare anything, because this is it's just what we

1176
00:55:13,080 --> 00:55:15,840
Speaker 3: wanted to do. We had to make that call and go, Okay,

1177
00:55:16,160 --> 00:55:17,000
Speaker 3: what's going to happen.

1178
00:55:17,080 --> 00:55:19,600
Speaker 2: And we don't have family in Melbourne as mentioned, you know,

1179
00:55:19,880 --> 00:55:23,240
Speaker 2: Jared's in Tazzi and Sunstraine coast of mine in Mildura,

1180
00:55:23,400 --> 00:55:26,920
Speaker 2: so it is us and but you know, it's our

1181
00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:30,840
Speaker 2: job to raise this little human. So I took the

1182
00:55:30,840 --> 00:55:35,800
Speaker 2: opportunity to leave and I got into the finance sector,

1183
00:55:36,080 --> 00:55:39,200
Speaker 2: into mortgages, and it was just horrendous.

1184
00:55:40,160 --> 00:55:42,440
Speaker 3: The year and a half that I worked in that.

1185
00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:46,000
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I felt sick every morning.

1186
00:55:46,200 --> 00:55:50,080
Speaker 3: I was worrying, like Michael's way too worried about people's

1187
00:55:50,080 --> 00:55:55,920
Speaker 3: financial situations because we're always so conservative. He would never

1188
00:55:55,920 --> 00:55:58,359
Speaker 3: give me specific details, but he would come home going

1189
00:55:58,400 --> 00:56:01,480
Speaker 3: like some people are just you know, like you know,

1190
00:56:01,480 --> 00:56:02,960
Speaker 3: they're going to afford that more. You know, they're get

1191
00:56:02,960 --> 00:56:05,080
Speaker 3: themselves into that big house that they want. But I

1192
00:56:05,120 --> 00:56:07,160
Speaker 3: think I could lose their job tomorrow and like where

1193
00:56:07,160 --> 00:56:08,839
Speaker 3: does that you know, they wouldn't get that money back

1194
00:56:08,840 --> 00:56:09,960
Speaker 3: on that house or whatever it might be.

1195
00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:12,359
Speaker 2: I'm like, I was your job to wait. I think

1196
00:56:12,360 --> 00:56:14,000
Speaker 2: I was just so naive to think that, you know,

1197
00:56:14,200 --> 00:56:17,400
Speaker 2: home loans. I thought it was like, you know, selling

1198
00:56:17,440 --> 00:56:20,879
Speaker 2: the dream of you know, home ownership, and not at all,

1199
00:56:20,920 --> 00:56:22,920
Speaker 2: It's just sales and commission.

1200
00:56:23,320 --> 00:56:25,400
Speaker 1: So, oh my god, this is little Michael coming out

1201
00:56:25,440 --> 00:56:27,640
Speaker 1: the like nurturer Michael, I.

1202
00:56:27,680 --> 00:56:31,120
Speaker 2: Know, and I just this was not a natural, not

1203
00:56:31,280 --> 00:56:34,640
Speaker 2: natural fit. But I had taken a new job. I

1204
00:56:34,680 --> 00:56:37,840
Speaker 2: had quit a left quarter, so I couldn't go back,

1205
00:56:38,400 --> 00:56:40,319
Speaker 2: and that was that was not an option. And I

1206
00:56:40,360 --> 00:56:44,800
Speaker 2: just felt the pressure of you know, providing for my family.

1207
00:56:44,920 --> 00:56:46,759
Speaker 2: Now that you know, it was my decision to leave.

1208
00:56:46,800 --> 00:56:48,640
Speaker 2: Now I've got to suck it up and just you know.

1209
00:56:48,719 --> 00:56:49,320
Speaker 3: Go to work.

1210
00:56:49,640 --> 00:56:54,640
Speaker 2: But with Jared's support, and I suppose I'm wavering, you know,

1211
00:56:54,760 --> 00:56:57,840
Speaker 2: commitment of supporting me and my decision to leave that

1212
00:56:57,920 --> 00:56:59,719
Speaker 2: industry because it was just not.

1213
00:57:01,120 --> 00:57:02,759
Speaker 3: I mean, it's right for some people. It's not that

1214
00:57:02,840 --> 00:57:04,560
Speaker 3: it was a bad job, but just for Michael, I'm like,

1215
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:06,480
Speaker 3: you can't tay awake at night, you can't feel sick

1216
00:57:06,520 --> 00:57:10,160
Speaker 3: going to work over someone else's mortgage. This is ridiculous.

1217
00:57:12,000 --> 00:57:15,239
Speaker 1: It's not, it's just it's that quote that I always say,

1218
00:57:15,280 --> 00:57:17,320
Speaker 1: if it costs your piece, it's too expensive. So it

1219
00:57:17,320 --> 00:57:20,160
Speaker 1: doesn't matter what else. Absolutely, yeah, like it could tick

1220
00:57:20,200 --> 00:57:22,840
Speaker 1: so many other boxes, but if it's making you desperately unhappy,

1221
00:57:23,360 --> 00:57:24,160
Speaker 1: life is too sure.

1222
00:57:24,200 --> 00:57:28,000
Speaker 2: Absolutely, But yeah, anyway, So, yeah, I suppose from leaving

1223
00:57:28,320 --> 00:57:31,560
Speaker 2: leaving Quantas to you know, getting a nine to five job,

1224
00:57:31,680 --> 00:57:34,360
Speaker 2: which was something that, yeah, I did really struggle with.

1225
00:57:34,480 --> 00:57:36,440
Speaker 2: It's taken me a little while to find the path

1226
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:40,000
Speaker 2: of something that I look forward to, you know, going

1227
00:57:40,040 --> 00:57:40,439
Speaker 2: to work.

1228
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:41,480
Speaker 3: I enjoy it.

1229
00:57:41,720 --> 00:57:46,840
Speaker 2: But I did spend too much time regretting the decision

1230
00:57:46,880 --> 00:57:49,600
Speaker 2: to lead Quantus. I think you used to go through

1231
00:57:49,640 --> 00:57:52,480
Speaker 2: that low patch of like, holy crap, what have I.

1232
00:57:52,480 --> 00:57:55,400
Speaker 3: Do and remembering all those amazing times you had, Like Quanus,

1233
00:57:55,400 --> 00:57:57,360
Speaker 3: we're in a different chapter of our lives when we

1234
00:57:57,440 --> 00:58:02,720
Speaker 3: worked for Quantas, you know, like just kids, you know,

1235
00:58:02,840 --> 00:58:06,400
Speaker 3: like you go, we'd be in Singapore. I bought most

1236
00:58:06,600 --> 00:58:09,040
Speaker 3: everything we own nearly came from Singapore. You know, I'd

1237
00:58:09,040 --> 00:58:10,400
Speaker 3: bring it back. I'd spend most of the time in

1238
00:58:10,560 --> 00:58:12,760
Speaker 3: the shopping or partying or you know, we did that

1239
00:58:12,800 --> 00:58:13,280
Speaker 3: for years.

1240
00:58:13,280 --> 00:58:15,200
Speaker 2: So part of the benefits there you get a free

1241
00:58:15,240 --> 00:58:17,400
Speaker 2: flight every month, so you just go to.

1242
00:58:18,320 --> 00:58:22,600
Speaker 3: Anywhere you want, just for lunch, Sydney really just for lunch.

1243
00:58:22,840 --> 00:58:27,560
Speaker 3: You know, very different, different lists, So it's hard when

1244
00:58:27,600 --> 00:58:30,560
Speaker 3: you change. I think when you change roles or you're pivoting,

1245
00:58:30,960 --> 00:58:33,680
Speaker 3: is to also remember the whole old picture, not just

1246
00:58:33,760 --> 00:58:36,360
Speaker 3: those moments and going, oh I wish I still had.

1247
00:58:36,200 --> 00:58:37,320
Speaker 1: That I missed that good time.

1248
00:58:38,320 --> 00:58:39,680
Speaker 3: It's not going to be that now. It's a different

1249
00:58:39,680 --> 00:58:43,480
Speaker 3: time of our lives now and more rewarding things that

1250
00:58:43,520 --> 00:58:45,280
Speaker 3: you've got to focus on right now.

1251
00:58:45,720 --> 00:58:50,320
Speaker 2: But our pivoting, I think, like go, like that's you know,

1252
00:58:50,360 --> 00:58:53,920
Speaker 2: believe in yourself and for sure, you know, take that step.

1253
00:58:54,240 --> 00:58:56,840
Speaker 2: Acknowledge that it will be a bit rocky. You know

1254
00:58:56,960 --> 00:58:59,560
Speaker 2: you might not fall on your feet first. Go you

1255
00:58:59,800 --> 00:59:01,880
Speaker 2: give yourself a bit of a break. Don't be too

1256
00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:05,840
Speaker 2: hard on yourself, and it's okay to look back and think,

1257
00:59:05,880 --> 00:59:09,120
Speaker 2: oh God, I shouldn't have left, but don't stay in

1258
00:59:09,120 --> 00:59:11,880
Speaker 2: that space for too long. You know, just own what

1259
00:59:11,920 --> 00:59:13,680
Speaker 2: you're doing and look forward.

1260
00:59:13,880 --> 00:59:16,320
Speaker 1: That's such great advice. And I also think that you know,

1261
00:59:16,400 --> 00:59:19,840
Speaker 1: the days of like finding a forever job over like,

1262
00:59:20,160 --> 00:59:22,400
Speaker 1: as you mentioned, you were in a different chapter when

1263
00:59:22,440 --> 00:59:24,320
Speaker 1: you were at Quantus and that worked for you, guys,

1264
00:59:24,320 --> 00:59:26,960
Speaker 1: But now you have, you know, two kids in the house,

1265
00:59:27,000 --> 00:59:29,200
Speaker 1: and your priorities change. And one of the things I'd

1266
00:59:29,240 --> 00:59:32,720
Speaker 1: try and really normalize here is like the mini pivot

1267
00:59:32,720 --> 00:59:36,000
Speaker 1: every few years, like your career and lifestyle and house

1268
00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:38,560
Speaker 1: and day structure. As you're a different person every year,

1269
00:59:38,960 --> 00:59:42,080
Speaker 1: it's okay if everything around you tweaks accordingly, Like no

1270
00:59:42,120 --> 00:59:44,800
Speaker 1: one's meant to have one job for their whole life

1271
00:59:44,920 --> 00:59:47,120
Speaker 1: or one life structure for their whole life. If you're

1272
00:59:47,120 --> 00:59:50,080
Speaker 1: trying on different things for side every two years, that's

1273
00:59:50,120 --> 00:59:53,480
Speaker 1: pretty normal in this day and age. What brings you

1274
00:59:53,640 --> 00:59:55,720
Speaker 1: joy or makes you your best self is not meant

1275
00:59:55,720 --> 00:59:57,440
Speaker 1: to look the same from you to hear. So that's

1276
00:59:57,720 --> 01:00:00,160
Speaker 1: such good advice to just be okay, Like, don't be

1277
01:00:00,240 --> 01:00:02,280
Speaker 1: hard on yourself if you don't make it to long

1278
01:00:02,320 --> 01:00:03,919
Speaker 1: service leave like who does now?

1279
01:00:04,120 --> 01:00:05,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly right.

1280
01:00:07,360 --> 01:00:10,480
Speaker 1: So then, in the reverse pattern to gay time, you

1281
01:00:10,520 --> 01:00:13,760
Speaker 1: work together for seventeen years before you guys got engaged

1282
01:00:13,800 --> 01:00:17,800
Speaker 1: in twenty eighteen. Another gay question, how do you know

1283
01:00:17,880 --> 01:00:20,400
Speaker 1: who is going to be the proposer? Like are you

1284
01:00:20,560 --> 01:00:21,720
Speaker 1: rushing to do it first?

1285
01:00:21,800 --> 01:00:24,640
Speaker 2: Like how does that? Michael certainly was not rushing.

1286
01:00:24,640 --> 01:00:26,680
Speaker 3: There was going to be there, just wouldn't it wouldn't

1287
01:00:26,720 --> 01:00:29,240
Speaker 3: be you know, Like I was like, oh, you know,

1288
01:00:29,440 --> 01:00:31,520
Speaker 3: I think I think I'm going I started to sort

1289
01:00:31,520 --> 01:00:33,160
Speaker 3: of whispering it to a couple of friends.

1290
01:00:33,160 --> 01:00:35,880
Speaker 2: I'm like, you know, I think I might ask him

1291
01:00:36,000 --> 01:00:37,840
Speaker 2: and we'll have a party.

1292
01:00:37,920 --> 01:00:40,520
Speaker 3: Like it's just a moment about the party, celebration getting

1293
01:00:40,560 --> 01:00:43,040
Speaker 3: everyone together. As daunting as that is too, because a

1294
01:00:43,080 --> 01:00:46,080
Speaker 3: wedding for anyone, not just SKay couples, but like that's

1295
01:00:46,080 --> 01:00:48,440
Speaker 3: when you put all your friends together, all your families

1296
01:00:48,440 --> 01:00:51,800
Speaker 3: and you know, you know, my parents had remarried, so

1297
01:00:51,840 --> 01:00:54,360
Speaker 3: there was two lots of families coming, so you know,

1298
01:00:54,560 --> 01:00:56,800
Speaker 3: all that run through my mind as I was like

1299
01:00:57,160 --> 01:00:59,080
Speaker 3: do I really ask them or do we just carry.

1300
01:00:58,800 --> 01:01:02,439
Speaker 2: On as you know as thing? But yeah, the urge

1301
01:01:02,440 --> 01:01:05,280
Speaker 2: for a big party certainly was more overwhelming, and I'm like, oh,

1302
01:01:05,320 --> 01:01:06,320
Speaker 2: fuck it, I'm going to do it.

1303
01:01:06,720 --> 01:01:09,160
Speaker 3: There's no way, like neither it's are overly romantic. I

1304
01:01:09,160 --> 01:01:11,280
Speaker 3: would say, we're thoughtful, but we're not romantic. So I

1305
01:01:11,280 --> 01:01:15,040
Speaker 3: don't think it's something that I thought you would ever do.

1306
01:01:15,440 --> 01:01:17,400
Speaker 3: I don't think, you know, if I'm honest, I would.

1307
01:01:19,320 --> 01:01:22,080
Speaker 2: With the status quo of you know, we're together, that

1308
01:01:22,120 --> 01:01:24,000
Speaker 2: we're a family.

1309
01:01:23,760 --> 01:01:24,600
Speaker 3: With you know, we don't.

1310
01:01:24,720 --> 01:01:28,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, but it was the best thing in recopect. Now

1311
01:01:29,160 --> 01:01:32,000
Speaker 2: it is the best thing. But you know, I wouldn't

1312
01:01:32,000 --> 01:01:33,600
Speaker 2: have popped the question, Oh.

1313
01:01:33,440 --> 01:01:35,760
Speaker 1: Wow, so that's good then, and so you knew it

1314
01:01:35,800 --> 01:01:37,320
Speaker 1: wasn't like, oh my god, who's going to do it?

1315
01:01:37,320 --> 01:01:38,640
Speaker 1: When so awkward?

1316
01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:42,640
Speaker 3: I think if Michael had asked, it would have been

1317
01:01:42,680 --> 01:01:44,480
Speaker 3: in the sense of do you want to, Oh, we.

1318
01:01:44,480 --> 01:01:50,120
Speaker 1: Should probably just do that.

1319
01:01:50,560 --> 01:01:52,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, oh my god, I love it.

1320
01:01:52,640 --> 01:01:55,640
Speaker 1: And so same sex marriage became legal in twenty seventeen, right,

1321
01:01:55,680 --> 01:01:58,560
Speaker 1: so you had a year to plan it, and then

1322
01:01:58,600 --> 01:02:01,440
Speaker 1: it was with balloons with pictures everywhere.

1323
01:02:01,480 --> 01:02:02,560
Speaker 2: I think, yeah, that's right.

1324
01:02:03,120 --> 01:02:04,560
Speaker 1: The albums that you printed.

1325
01:02:04,280 --> 01:02:06,160
Speaker 2: Out from the albums that I've got to hear in

1326
01:02:06,240 --> 01:02:07,280
Speaker 2: the kitchen Covens.

1327
01:02:07,520 --> 01:02:11,000
Speaker 3: Yes, I just went through because all our albums are

1328
01:02:11,000 --> 01:02:13,440
Speaker 3: everything's in order. So I just went through, turning pages

1329
01:02:13,480 --> 01:02:14,600
Speaker 3: till I got to the next year, and I just

1330
01:02:14,600 --> 01:02:16,560
Speaker 3: pulled one photo out from that and then I just

1331
01:02:16,600 --> 01:02:19,120
Speaker 3: had them all laminated and attached to balloons. And a

1332
01:02:19,200 --> 01:02:21,640
Speaker 3: friend offered their house. I was like, where can I

1333
01:02:21,680 --> 01:02:23,160
Speaker 3: do it. I'll do it here, like I was going

1334
01:02:23,200 --> 01:02:25,160
Speaker 3: to do it here or I don't think we're at

1335
01:02:25,160 --> 01:02:27,520
Speaker 3: this house, but I was like, no, he'll see it

1336
01:02:27,640 --> 01:02:30,959
Speaker 3: or he'll get wind of it happening. So yeah, girlfriend said,

1337
01:02:30,960 --> 01:02:32,600
Speaker 3: just do it at my house. I've got, you know,

1338
01:02:32,680 --> 01:02:35,520
Speaker 3: a room which I can empty out, and so I

1339
01:02:35,520 --> 01:02:39,000
Speaker 3: did and we were on our way home from dinner. Yeah,

1340
01:02:39,000 --> 01:02:41,600
Speaker 3: we went to a restaurant that we love because it

1341
01:02:41,640 --> 01:02:44,240
Speaker 3: was our anniversary and I said, oh, I've got to

1342
01:02:44,440 --> 01:02:46,560
Speaker 3: go around and they text you. Yeah.

1343
01:02:47,160 --> 01:02:50,320
Speaker 2: I'm so valible. Like honestly, if someone says, you know

1344
01:02:50,400 --> 01:02:51,960
Speaker 2: we're doing this, or you have to do this, or

1345
01:02:51,960 --> 01:02:55,560
Speaker 2: I'm going here, I just believe everything and everyone. You know,

1346
01:02:55,640 --> 01:02:58,000
Speaker 2: Jaron had some apointments leading up to this. You know,

1347
01:02:58,000 --> 01:02:59,640
Speaker 2: I've got to go and help with this selection of

1348
01:03:00,160 --> 01:03:02,400
Speaker 2: you know, interior design that this person is doing, and

1349
01:03:02,440 --> 01:03:03,920
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, yeah, no worries.

1350
01:03:03,720 --> 01:03:09,800
Speaker 3: Or that was me designing our rings, you know, like.

1351
01:03:09,720 --> 01:03:11,960
Speaker 2: I've got no clue. So but yeah, they had had

1352
01:03:12,000 --> 01:03:15,360
Speaker 2: a pretense that I had to get Jared there because

1353
01:03:15,360 --> 01:03:16,800
Speaker 2: I were going to surprise him.

1354
01:03:17,120 --> 01:03:21,439
Speaker 3: But oh my god, double surprise thing. I even can't

1355
01:03:21,480 --> 01:03:22,080
Speaker 3: understand it now.

1356
01:03:22,280 --> 01:03:25,640
Speaker 2: I was just like, yeah, you were.

1357
01:03:25,720 --> 01:03:29,120
Speaker 1: You were probably like, oh my god, we're surprised exactly.

1358
01:03:29,120 --> 01:03:31,560
Speaker 3: And I'm texting in the car and he's texting them

1359
01:03:31,600 --> 01:03:34,400
Speaker 3: at the same time a bit different reasons, thinking.

1360
01:03:34,160 --> 01:03:35,040
Speaker 2: We're getting each other.

1361
01:03:35,800 --> 01:03:38,320
Speaker 3: And then we walked into Mars like like to me,

1362
01:03:38,360 --> 01:03:42,680
Speaker 3: and I'm like it's no surprise. I'm like, okay, we're here,

1363
01:03:42,960 --> 01:03:45,360
Speaker 3: and I'm like, come into this room and we opened

1364
01:03:45,360 --> 01:03:46,960
Speaker 3: these double doors and that's where the balloons and my

1365
01:03:47,040 --> 01:03:48,920
Speaker 3: mom was like like, oh my god.

1366
01:03:49,960 --> 01:03:51,920
Speaker 2: The very first thought that went through my mind though,

1367
01:03:52,040 --> 01:03:53,520
Speaker 2: was like, God, this is a bit over the top

1368
01:03:53,560 --> 01:03:59,200
Speaker 2: for our friends giving us an anniversary present. Yeah, I've

1369
01:03:59,200 --> 01:04:01,120
Speaker 2: done that for us to spen.

1370
01:04:02,920 --> 01:04:04,200
Speaker 1: They love us so much.

1371
01:04:05,840 --> 01:04:08,640
Speaker 2: And then I realized that it was.

1372
01:04:08,640 --> 01:04:12,840
Speaker 1: Jared and your wedding was just absolutely spectacular. I mean,

1373
01:04:12,840 --> 01:04:14,880
Speaker 1: I think we got married like not that far away

1374
01:04:14,920 --> 01:04:16,640
Speaker 1: from each other, or I had used a lot of

1375
01:04:16,640 --> 01:04:19,680
Speaker 1: your pictures ass Bo, like your page was just in

1376
01:04:19,720 --> 01:04:23,000
Speaker 1: interest for me, apart from the suits, which obviously I

1377
01:04:23,040 --> 01:04:24,760
Speaker 1: did not wear a suit on my wedding day, but

1378
01:04:25,880 --> 01:04:29,880
Speaker 1: but your changes halfway through and then read sparkly suits.

1379
01:04:30,120 --> 01:04:31,480
Speaker 2: We did a small wedding.

1380
01:04:31,480 --> 01:04:34,560
Speaker 3: We had about a hundred guests, but we just wanted

1381
01:04:34,560 --> 01:04:39,280
Speaker 3: it intimate, that fun and you know our secure people,

1382
01:04:39,360 --> 01:04:41,680
Speaker 3: you know, like our close friends, that we could just

1383
01:04:41,760 --> 01:04:45,080
Speaker 3: be ourselves and have be wild and.

1384
01:04:44,840 --> 01:04:47,360
Speaker 2: It was really it was a great. Yeah, the wedding

1385
01:04:47,440 --> 01:04:51,000
Speaker 2: day was was spectacular, just you know, getting ready with

1386
01:04:51,040 --> 01:04:52,800
Speaker 2: the with the bridal party and we had all life

1387
01:04:52,800 --> 01:04:55,920
Speaker 2: photos down pre wedding so we could be party longer

1388
01:04:56,040 --> 01:05:00,640
Speaker 2: once we arrived there. We're not going anywhere to everyone

1389
01:05:00,640 --> 01:05:03,000
Speaker 2: else goes home, and we mentioned that in my speech

1390
01:05:03,040 --> 01:05:05,120
Speaker 2: as well as like we're not doing the farewell at

1391
01:05:05,120 --> 01:05:07,240
Speaker 2: eleven o'clock and wave goodbye to you all, you know,

1392
01:05:07,320 --> 01:05:09,720
Speaker 2: like we're always going to be we'll laughing.

1393
01:05:10,520 --> 01:05:11,240
Speaker 3: That was great.

1394
01:05:11,400 --> 01:05:14,720
Speaker 2: It was a great celebration. The ceremony itself was really beautiful.

1395
01:05:14,920 --> 01:05:20,160
Speaker 2: Hearing Jared's bows was really special. But the having as

1396
01:05:20,240 --> 01:05:22,320
Speaker 2: Jared mentioned the nearest and dearest in the room with

1397
01:05:22,400 --> 01:05:27,280
Speaker 2: us who had played such a part of our lives

1398
01:05:27,840 --> 01:05:31,160
Speaker 2: in Melbourne, and yeah, and followed us from you know,

1399
01:05:31,440 --> 01:05:34,720
Speaker 2: two guys to know our family with beautiful reads.

1400
01:05:34,760 --> 01:05:35,560
Speaker 3: So it was.

1401
01:05:35,560 --> 01:05:38,480
Speaker 2: Really a celebration for them as well to thank them

1402
01:05:38,640 --> 01:05:42,640
Speaker 2: for you know, what they've given to us. So, yeah,

1403
01:05:42,640 --> 01:05:44,440
Speaker 2: it was it was unreal. It was the best night

1404
01:05:44,480 --> 01:05:45,400
Speaker 2: of our lives.

1405
01:05:45,680 --> 01:05:48,440
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. It looked so beautiful and that radiated

1406
01:05:48,480 --> 01:05:50,400
Speaker 1: out that there was no like you weren't in neither

1407
01:05:50,440 --> 01:05:53,680
Speaker 1: of your bride dialers. It was just looked so much fun,

1408
01:05:54,040 --> 01:05:56,280
Speaker 1: like you were having the time of your lives. And

1409
01:05:56,320 --> 01:06:00,760
Speaker 1: now you tell us about June.

1410
01:06:01,840 --> 01:06:04,720
Speaker 3: And as you know, we're being foster parent and we

1411
01:06:04,840 --> 01:06:07,200
Speaker 3: were credited about a year and a half ago and

1412
01:06:07,520 --> 01:06:10,439
Speaker 3: through that process you're I don't know whether the word

1413
01:06:10,440 --> 01:06:14,600
Speaker 3: profiled is the right word, but it's you know, what

1414
01:06:14,640 --> 01:06:17,400
Speaker 3: we said all along is we don't whatever we do,

1415
01:06:17,640 --> 01:06:20,320
Speaker 3: any decisions we make, regardless of fostering or not, we

1416
01:06:20,360 --> 01:06:22,560
Speaker 3: don't want to impact on Reed's childhood. We want him

1417
01:06:22,600 --> 01:06:26,120
Speaker 3: to have the childhood he deserves. So when we were profiled,

1418
01:06:26,160 --> 01:06:29,440
Speaker 3: if you will, through fostering they've sort of said, yeah,

1419
01:06:29,720 --> 01:06:32,880
Speaker 3: best choice of our best placements for you would be

1420
01:06:32,880 --> 01:06:35,400
Speaker 3: between the ages of zero and maybe two and a

1421
01:06:35,440 --> 01:06:38,480
Speaker 3: half three years old, just that it would fit into

1422
01:06:38,480 --> 01:06:40,080
Speaker 3: your family. So that's why I think it took a

1423
01:06:40,120 --> 01:06:43,880
Speaker 3: lot longer to get any placements. And Little Junior came

1424
01:06:43,920 --> 01:06:47,000
Speaker 3: with like it was an hour's notice, and then it

1425
01:06:47,040 --> 01:06:50,439
Speaker 3: was half an hour's notice, like we'll be a house

1426
01:06:50,480 --> 01:06:52,920
Speaker 3: in thirty minutes. And I've got this photo which I'll

1427
01:06:52,960 --> 01:06:57,280
Speaker 3: share with you offline, of Reid's face in the car

1428
01:06:57,400 --> 01:07:01,480
Speaker 3: on speakerphone when he said, like when the focal came

1429
01:07:01,480 --> 01:07:03,840
Speaker 3: through and they said, we're sending a baby to your house.

1430
01:07:03,920 --> 01:07:07,120
Speaker 3: Like it's making memmost thinking about now, but it's something

1431
01:07:07,160 --> 01:07:10,600
Speaker 3: that he, you know, wanted so so much. Yeah, and

1432
01:07:10,640 --> 01:07:13,240
Speaker 3: I just because I take a photo of sucking everything, I.

1433
01:07:13,240 --> 01:07:14,960
Speaker 1: Know, I love it. You're you, and I are just

1434
01:07:15,000 --> 01:07:17,120
Speaker 1: like it's amazing.

1435
01:07:17,200 --> 01:07:17,360
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1436
01:07:17,400 --> 01:07:19,560
Speaker 3: We pulled overside the car and they're talking and I

1437
01:07:20,000 --> 01:07:21,800
Speaker 3: could hear it building and Read was trying to be

1438
01:07:21,840 --> 01:07:24,840
Speaker 3: quite act like he wasn't there, and I was just like,

1439
01:07:25,360 --> 01:07:26,920
Speaker 3: I have my phone in my hand, and I just

1440
01:07:27,040 --> 01:07:29,280
Speaker 3: I've got to capture this moment for ourselves. So that

1441
01:07:29,320 --> 01:07:31,760
Speaker 3: will never I'll never shed it online, but just that

1442
01:07:32,000 --> 01:07:36,280
Speaker 3: it's an incredible moment for him and he understands what

1443
01:07:36,280 --> 01:07:38,120
Speaker 3: we're doing, like he understands.

1444
01:07:37,680 --> 01:07:38,120
Speaker 2: What it is.

1445
01:07:38,160 --> 01:07:41,040
Speaker 3: It's not that he's lonely and says, you know, I

1446
01:07:41,120 --> 01:07:43,960
Speaker 3: just I've got to have this. He was. He's just like,

1447
01:07:43,960 --> 01:07:46,720
Speaker 3: we're helping a family. We're helped, we're doing something good

1448
01:07:48,400 --> 01:07:50,680
Speaker 3: and doing all the training that you do with fostering.

1449
01:07:51,400 --> 01:07:55,120
Speaker 3: It makes you very aware that you're doing this for them,

1450
01:07:55,240 --> 01:07:58,920
Speaker 3: for the child, not for yourself or for you know,

1451
01:07:59,000 --> 01:07:59,680
Speaker 3: I mean part of it.

1452
01:08:00,080 --> 01:08:03,680
Speaker 2: See you feel good, But at the end of the

1453
01:08:03,680 --> 01:08:08,520
Speaker 2: game is reunification and that's that's what That's what we're

1454
01:08:08,640 --> 01:08:10,680
Speaker 2: always going to aim for. They hope for that.

1455
01:08:10,840 --> 01:08:14,040
Speaker 3: You know, the system works, and the system looks after

1456
01:08:14,080 --> 01:08:16,519
Speaker 3: the child and its best interest is where it needs

1457
01:08:16,520 --> 01:08:18,400
Speaker 3: to be, and if that's with us for eighteen years,

1458
01:08:18,640 --> 01:08:21,639
Speaker 3: then that's fine. But if it's not, we can't you say,

1459
01:08:21,960 --> 01:08:23,680
Speaker 3: you know that. One of the biggest questions that we've

1460
01:08:23,680 --> 01:08:25,640
Speaker 3: had online is like, oh, how on earth could you

1461
01:08:25,680 --> 01:08:27,640
Speaker 3: give him up? You know, like us give it up

1462
01:08:27,640 --> 01:08:30,000
Speaker 3: at the end. Well, that's the plan, you.

1463
01:08:29,960 --> 01:08:38,799
Speaker 2: Know, is that you have been there for for you know, mums,

1464
01:08:38,880 --> 01:08:42,160
Speaker 2: dad's babies, to help them work through the measures they

1465
01:08:42,240 --> 01:08:45,639
Speaker 2: have to before they can be their own little family again.

1466
01:08:45,720 --> 01:08:49,200
Speaker 1: And you guys are giving little Junior so much love,

1467
01:08:49,400 --> 01:08:54,200
Speaker 1: like watching Read looking after it is just so beautiful.

1468
01:08:54,320 --> 01:08:57,400
Speaker 1: The way he's like taken on this like brotherly nurturing role.

1469
01:08:57,400 --> 01:09:00,599
Speaker 1: I think something that shines through so much much about

1470
01:09:00,600 --> 01:09:02,400
Speaker 1: the way that you've parented and the way that you've

1471
01:09:02,400 --> 01:09:04,920
Speaker 1: instilled kindness and your values into Read, and then the

1472
01:09:04,920 --> 01:09:07,719
Speaker 1: way he applies it in his life is and also

1473
01:09:07,760 --> 01:09:11,600
Speaker 1: the way you guys have such a beautiful balance between like,

1474
01:09:11,760 --> 01:09:13,719
Speaker 1: as you mentioned, you take a lot of photos of things,

1475
01:09:13,760 --> 01:09:16,240
Speaker 1: but a lot of it gets chosen specifically not to

1476
01:09:16,280 --> 01:09:18,640
Speaker 1: go on your account, Like you share a lot, but

1477
01:09:18,680 --> 01:09:20,599
Speaker 1: you also don't share a lot and keep a lot

1478
01:09:20,600 --> 01:09:22,720
Speaker 1: of moments private to yourself. And then Read gets a

1479
01:09:22,760 --> 01:09:24,479
Speaker 1: lot of airtime. But then there are certain things that

1480
01:09:24,520 --> 01:09:27,320
Speaker 1: he he also likes to keep private. And I think

1481
01:09:27,520 --> 01:09:29,840
Speaker 1: you guys have just navigated it so well.

1482
01:09:29,960 --> 01:09:31,680
Speaker 3: There is a lot you know, and people say, oh,

1483
01:09:31,720 --> 01:09:34,439
Speaker 3: you share your lives or yeah, you share everything online

1484
01:09:34,479 --> 01:09:36,559
Speaker 3: and well I don't. As you know, an instant story

1485
01:09:36,640 --> 01:09:40,120
Speaker 3: is fifteen seconds and yeah, maybe four hours. So there's

1486
01:09:40,120 --> 01:09:41,920
Speaker 3: a hell of a lot that doesn't go online, and

1487
01:09:42,400 --> 01:09:44,439
Speaker 3: you know, a lot of it is approved or not

1488
01:09:44,479 --> 01:09:47,519
Speaker 3: approved by Read. And you know, he nine times out

1489
01:09:47,520 --> 01:09:49,599
Speaker 3: of ten because he's born and bred, you know, into

1490
01:09:49,600 --> 01:09:52,439
Speaker 3: a family that has shared our lives for so long,

1491
01:09:53,080 --> 01:09:55,599
Speaker 3: and that stands. And he'll give me a disclaimer going,

1492
01:09:56,320 --> 01:09:58,559
Speaker 3: do not tell anyone. I don't share this, you know,

1493
01:09:58,640 --> 01:10:02,120
Speaker 3: because he might be making crafting and he's not happy

1494
01:10:02,120 --> 01:10:04,280
Speaker 3: with it, or he just wants a moment that you know.

1495
01:10:04,320 --> 01:10:07,320
Speaker 3: So he's totally in charge of what content we do

1496
01:10:07,400 --> 01:10:08,360
Speaker 3: share and don't share.

1497
01:10:08,439 --> 01:10:09,839
Speaker 2: And yeah, oh.

1498
01:10:09,720 --> 01:10:11,960
Speaker 1: That's so beautiful, and it seems like it's a family

1499
01:10:12,000 --> 01:10:14,719
Speaker 1: decision as well, like no one's sort of uncomfortable with anything.

1500
01:10:15,200 --> 01:10:18,120
Speaker 1: Did you guys consider having another child yourself?

1501
01:10:18,360 --> 01:10:23,599
Speaker 3: Absolutely? It wasn't until probably I think two years after

1502
01:10:23,800 --> 01:10:26,400
Speaker 3: we had Read is about the time that I noticed

1503
01:10:26,800 --> 01:10:28,519
Speaker 3: all our other friends seemed to have their second child.

1504
01:10:28,560 --> 01:10:29,800
Speaker 3: They seem to have a two year old, and then

1505
01:10:29,800 --> 01:10:31,800
Speaker 3: they have an impact.

1506
01:10:31,600 --> 01:10:34,520
Speaker 1: And it wasn't really it's a cycle cycle.

1507
01:10:34,200 --> 01:10:37,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it wasn't really something back then that I think.

1508
01:10:37,080 --> 01:10:40,559
Speaker 3: I think we were just so grateful, so happy, and.

1509
01:10:41,360 --> 01:10:44,080
Speaker 2: We were really privileged to be parents. You know, Read's

1510
01:10:44,080 --> 01:10:47,000
Speaker 2: pregnancy was troubled. I think there were shoes and.

1511
01:10:47,040 --> 01:10:50,280
Speaker 3: We had discouraged before him, so we had the heartbreak

1512
01:10:50,360 --> 01:10:53,240
Speaker 3: that you know, and Read was a frozen embryo, so

1513
01:10:54,280 --> 01:10:57,840
Speaker 3: we sort of experienced not what other people go through,

1514
01:10:57,880 --> 01:11:00,400
Speaker 3: because to carry a child is incredible, like and you

1515
01:11:00,960 --> 01:11:03,640
Speaker 3: lose a child like that, but some sense of you know,

1516
01:11:03,720 --> 01:11:05,599
Speaker 3: like it's out of our control, you.

1517
01:11:05,560 --> 01:11:08,320
Speaker 2: Know, like, yeah, we were already blessed that. When Red

1518
01:11:08,360 --> 01:11:11,160
Speaker 2: was born, the doctors expected him to go into like

1519
01:11:11,200 --> 01:11:14,360
Speaker 2: a high dependency unit because his kidneys weren't developing and

1520
01:11:14,400 --> 01:11:17,040
Speaker 2: he was born a month prem and they were sort

1521
01:11:17,080 --> 01:11:19,960
Speaker 2: of thinking that I have to intervene, and that didn't happen.

1522
01:11:19,960 --> 01:11:21,880
Speaker 2: He was born, He was in our arms in two minutes.

1523
01:11:21,960 --> 01:11:24,519
Speaker 2: He was healthy, one hundred percent. Everything that they were

1524
01:11:24,520 --> 01:11:29,240
Speaker 2: worried about didn't come to fruition. So we were so blessed.

1525
01:11:29,240 --> 01:11:34,720
Speaker 2: But that rollercoaster of those emotions, you know, throughout the

1526
01:11:34,760 --> 01:11:37,640
Speaker 2: pregnancy were still very strong. So we were just very

1527
01:11:37,640 --> 01:11:40,759
Speaker 2: grateful for a healthy child. We didn't think we could

1528
01:11:41,160 --> 01:11:42,679
Speaker 2: risk that again, you know, like it was like blood,

1529
01:11:42,720 --> 01:11:47,120
Speaker 2: hell loves. We're so blessed, you know, enjoy our family.

1530
01:11:47,600 --> 01:11:48,400
Speaker 3: We're very lucky.

1531
01:11:48,840 --> 01:11:53,000
Speaker 2: So it wasn't until just five years ago. Yeah, yeah,

1532
01:11:53,080 --> 01:11:54,840
Speaker 2: that you sort of start to.

1533
01:11:54,800 --> 01:11:57,920
Speaker 3: Think, oh, I'm getting older, like in that whole you know,

1534
01:11:58,240 --> 01:12:00,360
Speaker 3: you put pressure on yourself going, oh I think old

1535
01:12:00,400 --> 01:12:03,000
Speaker 3: now to maybe look in look into doing this. And

1536
01:12:03,040 --> 01:12:06,200
Speaker 3: then we did start looking into it, and again very

1537
01:12:06,280 --> 01:12:08,760
Speaker 3: very difficult, very difficult legally to.

1538
01:12:08,720 --> 01:12:11,559
Speaker 2: Do it, and have since changed their laws and the

1539
01:12:11,600 --> 01:12:16,360
Speaker 2: same sex surrogacy is not an option anymore, so that's

1540
01:12:16,400 --> 01:12:20,360
Speaker 2: off the table. And that's when we were at an

1541
01:12:20,400 --> 01:12:23,599
Speaker 2: Australia Day luncheon and somebody looked at us and came

1542
01:12:23,680 --> 01:12:26,679
Speaker 2: up and started chatting, and she assumed that Reid was adopted,

1543
01:12:27,040 --> 01:12:29,080
Speaker 2: and we just got chatting about that and said, oh,

1544
01:12:29,200 --> 01:12:33,360
Speaker 2: my girlfriend has a beautiful charity. They're just starting their

1545
01:12:33,360 --> 01:12:36,559
Speaker 2: own fostering. And we looked at each other and thought, okay,

1546
01:12:36,680 --> 01:12:39,080
Speaker 2: this is it. Yeah, went down the training and the

1547
01:12:39,080 --> 01:12:43,639
Speaker 2: accreditation for fostering, but yeah, it's still in our minds. Yeah,

1548
01:12:43,800 --> 01:12:49,280
Speaker 2: it's certainly stronger than ever now. Yes that it's not

1549
01:12:49,400 --> 01:12:49,840
Speaker 2: off the time.

1550
01:12:49,880 --> 01:12:52,160
Speaker 3: We wish it was easier, you know, we wish it

1551
01:12:52,240 --> 01:12:55,360
Speaker 3: was even international. Sorry, so if we go to America like,

1552
01:12:55,560 --> 01:12:57,600
Speaker 3: look at the last two years, like the thought of

1553
01:12:57,680 --> 01:13:00,360
Speaker 3: being stuck somewhere, or like how does that all work?

1554
01:13:00,400 --> 01:13:02,719
Speaker 3: That just adds so much more complexity to it happening.

1555
01:13:03,320 --> 01:13:07,640
Speaker 3: So for now, we will just be happy with what

1556
01:13:07,680 --> 01:13:08,559
Speaker 3: we've got, Honey.

1557
01:13:08,680 --> 01:13:11,080
Speaker 1: Well, I think something else that's really resonating for me

1558
01:13:11,120 --> 01:13:12,960
Speaker 1: over this whole chat is that there are so many

1559
01:13:13,040 --> 01:13:16,800
Speaker 1: milestones in your life, like read and then marriage and

1560
01:13:16,840 --> 01:13:20,400
Speaker 1: then Junior that you didn't even know you were aiming

1561
01:13:20,439 --> 01:13:25,360
Speaker 1: for until they stumbled into your life somehow, absolutely, And

1562
01:13:25,360 --> 01:13:28,160
Speaker 1: I think that's so beautiful because it's left you both

1563
01:13:28,200 --> 01:13:31,439
Speaker 1: with It seems like this trust that let's just enjoy

1564
01:13:31,520 --> 01:13:34,080
Speaker 1: now because like we don't know what's going to happen

1565
01:13:34,120 --> 01:13:36,320
Speaker 1: next year or in ten years. And I think in

1566
01:13:36,520 --> 01:13:39,080
Speaker 1: a time like this where the uncertainty, life is always uncertain,

1567
01:13:39,120 --> 01:13:42,599
Speaker 1: but the uncertainty is so intense right now hearing you

1568
01:13:42,600 --> 01:13:45,519
Speaker 1: guys just trust that the next chapter might be something

1569
01:13:45,560 --> 01:13:48,599
Speaker 1: you don't even know exists. Yet it's so reassuring. It's

1570
01:13:48,640 --> 01:13:49,559
Speaker 1: such a lovely message.

1571
01:13:49,560 --> 01:13:51,639
Speaker 2: I think there's something that we try and still as read.

1572
01:13:51,640 --> 01:13:53,720
Speaker 2: The only thing we can control right now is how

1573
01:13:53,760 --> 01:13:56,479
Speaker 2: I'm feeling right now, you know, so it's.

1574
01:13:56,720 --> 01:13:58,639
Speaker 3: That's coming up more and more now at his age

1575
01:13:58,680 --> 01:14:02,480
Speaker 3: of eleven, him worrying about out you know the scenarios

1576
01:14:02,680 --> 01:14:04,679
Speaker 3: you know like this, and we're like at the moment,

1577
01:14:04,760 --> 01:14:06,920
Speaker 3: you're in this one. So you know, like whatever that

1578
01:14:07,000 --> 01:14:10,479
Speaker 3: may be, in whatever he's only got yellow wool. You know.

1579
01:14:15,280 --> 01:14:17,519
Speaker 2: You're in this situation now, don't worry about getting made

1580
01:14:17,520 --> 01:14:17,880
Speaker 2: by wool.

1581
01:14:19,320 --> 01:14:24,360
Speaker 1: Just chill, just chill. Well, the last couple of questions

1582
01:14:24,400 --> 01:14:26,599
Speaker 1: for you guys are more around the idea of play,

1583
01:14:26,760 --> 01:14:29,080
Speaker 1: which is like, again, like so much of what people

1584
01:14:29,160 --> 01:14:30,880
Speaker 1: probably ask you about I want to talk about is

1585
01:14:30,880 --> 01:14:35,040
Speaker 1: like really serious messaging about inclusion and family and you know,

1586
01:14:35,200 --> 01:14:37,519
Speaker 1: self acceptance and all that kind of stuff. But in

1587
01:14:37,640 --> 01:14:40,839
Speaker 1: between all of that, how do you guys just play?

1588
01:14:41,280 --> 01:14:43,640
Speaker 1: And for Michael, like outside of work, is there a

1589
01:14:43,680 --> 01:14:46,120
Speaker 1: way that you just like switch off from kind of

1590
01:14:46,160 --> 01:14:49,880
Speaker 1: productive like let's achieve things you and just forget what

1591
01:14:49,920 --> 01:14:51,639
Speaker 1: time it is? Like what do you guys do for fun?

1592
01:14:51,920 --> 01:14:54,920
Speaker 2: Rugs?

1593
01:14:57,080 --> 01:15:02,439
Speaker 1: And that's not a you For me, I.

1594
01:15:02,680 --> 01:15:06,680
Speaker 2: Think something that we really enjoy together is walking. We

1595
01:15:07,640 --> 01:15:09,800
Speaker 2: going for a stroll, taking the dogs for a walk,

1596
01:15:09,880 --> 01:15:11,160
Speaker 2: taking in a junior in the pram.

1597
01:15:11,360 --> 01:15:13,880
Speaker 3: Now where we do the most, talking the most because

1598
01:15:13,920 --> 01:15:16,519
Speaker 3: you're constantly like concentrating on each other, put in.

1599
01:15:16,439 --> 01:15:18,439
Speaker 2: The fine away and just you know, going for an

1600
01:15:18,439 --> 01:15:21,960
Speaker 2: hour's walk is something that we really both enjoy. It's

1601
01:15:21,960 --> 01:15:24,880
Speaker 2: really it's really good for us. Cooking is something that

1602
01:15:24,960 --> 01:15:29,840
Speaker 2: I get inspired with and then I'll be gangbusters for

1603
01:15:29,880 --> 01:15:31,760
Speaker 2: a few weeks, and then I won't want to touch

1604
01:15:31,800 --> 01:15:33,000
Speaker 2: up pot again for another few.

1605
01:15:34,439 --> 01:15:36,160
Speaker 1: It's like hard and fast, hard and fast.

1606
01:15:36,479 --> 01:15:41,320
Speaker 3: Absolutely renovating that's a fun thing. We we love doing them.

1607
01:15:41,360 --> 01:15:43,439
Speaker 3: We've done a few houses ourselves.

1608
01:15:43,560 --> 01:15:46,040
Speaker 2: Because I'm a builder by trade. I left school. My

1609
01:15:46,080 --> 01:15:48,800
Speaker 2: first job was an apprentice carpenter, so.

1610
01:15:49,200 --> 01:15:51,960
Speaker 1: Oh my god, you're chippy earlier.

1611
01:15:52,560 --> 01:15:55,519
Speaker 2: So I've spent eight years in the building industry. So

1612
01:15:56,840 --> 01:15:59,960
Speaker 2: when we buy property, we try to do a lot

1613
01:16:00,080 --> 01:16:03,400
Speaker 2: of work ourselves. So that's something that Jared's got a

1614
01:16:03,439 --> 01:16:08,120
Speaker 2: really great eye for design and detail and expensive things

1615
01:16:08,680 --> 01:16:12,679
Speaker 2: to make it look rain in the budget on a budget.

1616
01:16:13,800 --> 01:16:15,559
Speaker 1: I love that you guys are doing some of your

1617
01:16:15,600 --> 01:16:18,360
Speaker 1: reno's in down on the Peninsula, and I think you

1618
01:16:18,479 --> 01:16:20,920
Speaker 1: posted the other day how annoying it is that you're

1619
01:16:20,960 --> 01:16:23,120
Speaker 1: missing all the hot trads like you keep getting videos

1620
01:16:23,160 --> 01:16:24,920
Speaker 1: of them, but you can't actually be there to purb

1621
01:16:24,960 --> 01:16:25,519
Speaker 1: on them all day.

1622
01:16:25,920 --> 01:16:29,280
Speaker 3: And then I'm like, oh, the actual trades that are there,

1623
01:16:29,320 --> 01:16:31,240
Speaker 3: Like they know about social media.

1624
01:16:31,280 --> 01:16:32,479
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, maybe they saw that.

1625
01:16:33,080 --> 01:16:34,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, they probably did.

1626
01:16:35,880 --> 01:16:38,400
Speaker 3: Hopefully they've all finished by the time it's lockdowns over

1627
01:16:38,479 --> 01:16:40,599
Speaker 3: and I don't actually meet them ever.

1628
01:16:40,680 --> 01:16:43,800
Speaker 1: Have to make them so awkward, so lovely the.

1629
01:16:43,760 --> 01:16:46,479
Speaker 2: Others a few of them are. Then I heard they laughed.

1630
01:16:47,040 --> 01:16:50,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, Oh my god, I love that so much. Second

1631
01:16:50,200 --> 01:16:52,880
Speaker 1: last question, which I think you should answer for each

1632
01:16:52,880 --> 01:16:55,639
Speaker 1: other to just like dish the tea, what are three

1633
01:16:55,680 --> 01:16:58,520
Speaker 1: interesting things about you that don't normally come up in conversation.

1634
01:16:58,640 --> 01:17:00,439
Speaker 1: Which is easy for you because this is your first

1635
01:17:00,439 --> 01:17:03,360
Speaker 1: podcast conversation, so it can be anything don't.

1636
01:17:03,160 --> 01:17:05,439
Speaker 3: Come up in conversation three things about you.

1637
01:17:06,080 --> 01:17:08,200
Speaker 1: Or just like the people like. The way I describe

1638
01:17:08,200 --> 01:17:10,439
Speaker 1: it is, what would your partner know about you just

1639
01:17:10,479 --> 01:17:12,719
Speaker 1: from living with you, or anyone who like had stayed

1640
01:17:12,720 --> 01:17:14,960
Speaker 1: at your house would know about you that your other

1641
01:17:15,040 --> 01:17:17,720
Speaker 1: friends wouldn't, Like quirky little things that you do, like

1642
01:17:17,760 --> 01:17:21,040
Speaker 1: sing in the shower, or like the sleep eating that

1643
01:17:21,080 --> 01:17:22,920
Speaker 1: I told you about that I do like only people

1644
01:17:22,920 --> 01:17:25,080
Speaker 1: who have stayed somewhere with me know that I do

1645
01:17:25,120 --> 01:17:27,320
Speaker 1: that because there are always packets of food around my head.

1646
01:17:29,000 --> 01:17:32,720
Speaker 3: Oh god, I really should have That's yeah, this is

1647
01:17:33,120 --> 01:17:39,640
Speaker 3: focused on I actually do share so much of like Michael,

1648
01:17:39,920 --> 01:17:43,519
Speaker 3: you know, like quirks that there's not a lot that

1649
01:17:43,560 --> 01:17:44,679
Speaker 3: people wouldn't know about.

1650
01:17:44,720 --> 01:17:46,640
Speaker 1: The do you have party tricks? Like it is the

1651
01:17:46,840 --> 01:17:51,120
Speaker 1: like do you juggle? Or are there like weird boring?

1652
01:17:51,360 --> 01:17:56,839
Speaker 1: You're not boring, you guys, you are so not okay,

1653
01:17:56,840 --> 01:17:59,360
Speaker 1: Oh okay, maybe okay. The first one can be like

1654
01:17:59,680 --> 01:18:03,000
Speaker 1: who is the most so who is the most fashionable?

1655
01:18:03,000 --> 01:18:03,439
Speaker 1: Between you?

1656
01:18:03,880 --> 01:18:07,519
Speaker 3: That's again neither of us. That's definitely definitely Jared.

1657
01:18:07,720 --> 01:18:11,880
Speaker 2: Jared would like I'll put oh yeah to big whole

1658
01:18:11,920 --> 01:18:15,200
Speaker 2: faith in Jared going shopping for me, no problems at all.

1659
01:18:15,240 --> 01:18:19,000
Speaker 2: He can go buy me shoes, pants, shirts, whatever like

1660
01:18:19,080 --> 01:18:21,280
Speaker 2: that would be fine. I would wear that, no problems

1661
01:18:21,280 --> 01:18:23,920
Speaker 2: at all. But I don't think I've ever once bought

1662
01:18:23,960 --> 01:18:26,439
Speaker 2: something for him that hasn't gone back.

1663
01:18:28,680 --> 01:18:33,679
Speaker 1: Always have the gift receipts, even.

1664
01:18:33,520 --> 01:18:34,400
Speaker 3: When he had bag.

1665
01:18:34,479 --> 01:18:36,200
Speaker 2: I'm like, have you got the receipt because you haven't.

1666
01:18:36,760 --> 01:18:39,880
Speaker 3: Oh my god. Sometimes I say you want a seat

1667
01:18:39,880 --> 01:18:41,240
Speaker 3: and you say no, and then I have to go

1668
01:18:41,360 --> 01:18:44,200
Speaker 3: back and do the whole bloody pantomime for them as

1669
01:18:44,240 --> 01:18:46,320
Speaker 3: to why I've got this item and I'm bringing it back.

1670
01:18:47,040 --> 01:18:47,759
Speaker 3: Oh my god.

1671
01:18:49,800 --> 01:18:51,360
Speaker 1: But do you go share a wardrobe? Like, do you

1672
01:18:51,360 --> 01:18:53,200
Speaker 1: ever share a wardrobe? Do you cross over? Do you

1673
01:18:53,240 --> 01:18:54,240
Speaker 1: steal each other's clothes or.

1674
01:18:56,760 --> 01:18:57,200
Speaker 2: Wade a bit?

1675
01:18:57,280 --> 01:19:00,840
Speaker 3: So sometimes we do fit into each other cloth, sometimes not.

1676
01:19:00,920 --> 01:19:03,040
Speaker 3: But when every time we get dressed, it's sort of

1677
01:19:03,040 --> 01:19:04,880
Speaker 3: like i'd stand at the bottom of the stairs and

1678
01:19:04,920 --> 01:19:06,760
Speaker 3: Michael has to come and show me what he's wearing,

1679
01:19:06,760 --> 01:19:09,160
Speaker 3: because we can't wear the same thing, you know, like

1680
01:19:09,200 --> 01:19:13,479
Speaker 3: the same the same shirt. Because I'll buy like a

1681
01:19:13,840 --> 01:19:16,759
Speaker 3: pair of trousers and I buy it like four pairs

1682
01:19:16,840 --> 01:19:18,000
Speaker 3: all because they fit well.

1683
01:19:18,280 --> 01:19:19,160
Speaker 2: And your shirt.

1684
01:19:19,200 --> 01:19:20,760
Speaker 3: So if there's a shirt I like, I'm like, I'm

1685
01:19:20,840 --> 01:19:22,160
Speaker 3: come home and I wear it for a couple of days,

1686
01:19:22,160 --> 01:19:23,240
Speaker 3: and then I go and buy two more of them

1687
01:19:23,280 --> 01:19:25,280
Speaker 3: because I'm like, when this one wears out, I'll have that.

1688
01:19:25,840 --> 01:19:28,640
Speaker 3: Sometimes our wardrobe is very much like three of the

1689
01:19:28,680 --> 01:19:31,760
Speaker 3: same things. And then it's whilst he's working away it's

1690
01:19:31,760 --> 01:19:33,479
Speaker 3: been good and like take whatever you want, wear whatever

1691
01:19:33,560 --> 01:19:34,120
Speaker 3: you want.

1692
01:19:34,320 --> 01:19:34,840
Speaker 2: In my home.

1693
01:19:34,920 --> 01:19:36,639
Speaker 3: It's like we're standing at the top of the stairs

1694
01:19:36,680 --> 01:19:38,120
Speaker 3: going that.

1695
01:19:39,080 --> 01:19:41,519
Speaker 1: You know, so there's sections right like you do. There's

1696
01:19:41,520 --> 01:19:47,679
Speaker 1: not just a wardrobe. You have your own. That doesn't

1697
01:19:47,680 --> 01:19:48,519
Speaker 1: surprise me at all.

1698
01:19:48,560 --> 01:19:51,000
Speaker 2: A lot of a lot of ging.

1699
01:19:56,520 --> 01:19:59,200
Speaker 1: What about if you're on a desert island. What are

1700
01:19:59,240 --> 01:20:01,720
Speaker 1: the three things you would have have to take? Each other?

1701
01:20:01,840 --> 01:20:04,240
Speaker 1: Answer for each other, like, couldn't live without it.

1702
01:20:04,240 --> 01:20:07,719
Speaker 3: Couldn't live without Michael, couldn't live without a bottle of pinot.

1703
01:20:08,160 --> 01:20:09,400
Speaker 1: Oh, yes, nice.

1704
01:20:10,000 --> 01:20:12,839
Speaker 3: I don't think Jared could live without the Internet.

1705
01:20:13,400 --> 01:20:16,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, he'd take the Internet.

1706
01:20:17,960 --> 01:20:20,080
Speaker 2: But if there was no reception on that desert island,

1707
01:20:20,680 --> 01:20:22,400
Speaker 2: he would go ape ship Like if there was a

1708
01:20:22,439 --> 01:20:25,760
Speaker 2: technical no what what Spotify? Yeah, if there was no

1709
01:20:25,920 --> 01:20:29,360
Speaker 2: music like no, yeah, yeah, yeah, three things. Yeah, So

1710
01:20:29,439 --> 01:20:31,599
Speaker 2: Jared would have to take the whole of the Internet.

1711
01:20:32,320 --> 01:20:35,720
Speaker 2: He would have to take music. You would have to

1712
01:20:35,720 --> 01:20:37,479
Speaker 2: have that at your fingertips.

1713
01:20:38,200 --> 01:20:41,240
Speaker 1: The entire Spotify. Also, that's kind of inside the Internet.

1714
01:20:41,360 --> 01:20:42,960
Speaker 3: That's true. That's true.

1715
01:20:43,240 --> 01:20:45,519
Speaker 1: I love how your son has like not figured into

1716
01:20:45,520 --> 01:20:46,160
Speaker 1: this conversation.

1717
01:20:47,720 --> 01:20:57,639
Speaker 3: Yea, the Internet, you, Michael would be his revolting biscuit pillow.

1718
01:20:57,760 --> 01:21:01,280
Speaker 3: Even like we take down to the beach house, he

1719
01:21:01,360 --> 01:21:06,719
Speaker 3: has to take this disgusting. LaTeX's also latex pill latex pillow,

1720
01:21:06,960 --> 01:21:09,960
Speaker 3: but it's like way for thin. I'm like, it's like

1721
01:21:09,960 --> 01:21:10,920
Speaker 3: having the Oh my.

1722
01:21:10,840 --> 01:21:14,000
Speaker 1: God, that's why you call it biscuits. Literally, I thought

1723
01:21:14,040 --> 01:21:15,920
Speaker 1: you were like a Scotch finger.

1724
01:21:19,760 --> 01:21:26,400
Speaker 3: Revolting so many like players over just to hide its grossness.

1725
01:21:26,400 --> 01:21:28,680
Speaker 3: His pello and I can't sleep without a I'm like,

1726
01:21:28,720 --> 01:21:30,800
Speaker 3: you lay on it. It's like having no pellow.

1727
01:21:30,479 --> 01:21:34,640
Speaker 2: So just try now, Oh no.

1728
01:21:33,320 --> 01:21:35,240
Speaker 1: No, we can't do that. I like, see, these are

1729
01:21:35,240 --> 01:21:37,080
Speaker 1: the things that I love, those weird cloks, like the

1730
01:21:37,120 --> 01:21:37,840
Speaker 1: biscuit pillow.

1731
01:21:38,360 --> 01:21:39,000
Speaker 2: It's annoying.

1732
01:21:39,040 --> 01:21:40,599
Speaker 3: And because when we're going down and we go down

1733
01:21:40,640 --> 01:21:42,680
Speaker 3: in separate cars, I don't get the biscuit. It's like

1734
01:21:42,720 --> 01:21:43,439
Speaker 3: you got my biscuit.

1735
01:21:43,600 --> 01:21:49,280
Speaker 1: Like And also then when you want to like have

1736
01:21:49,360 --> 01:21:51,439
Speaker 1: your photo in the background of like content or something

1737
01:21:51,520 --> 01:21:53,280
Speaker 1: like your bed in the background, and then you've got

1738
01:21:53,320 --> 01:21:56,759
Speaker 1: like one bit fluffy pillow and then this fairal biscuit.

1739
01:21:56,880 --> 01:21:58,880
Speaker 1: Yeah get it. I totally get it. That's just a

1740
01:21:58,880 --> 01:21:59,760
Speaker 1: far buzz kill.

1741
01:22:00,120 --> 01:22:01,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a turner buzz girl.

1742
01:22:02,439 --> 01:22:04,280
Speaker 1: You have pet peeves of each other, and you can't

1743
01:22:04,320 --> 01:22:05,639
Speaker 1: use biscuits because you already used it.

1744
01:22:05,960 --> 01:22:10,920
Speaker 3: Michael's just falls asleep all the time, like seriously, at

1745
01:22:10,960 --> 01:22:15,280
Speaker 3: any any opportunity and a little bit of quietness.

1746
01:22:14,800 --> 01:22:16,480
Speaker 1: And it's just all of the times.

1747
01:22:17,040 --> 01:22:19,200
Speaker 3: Like that's why the run took so long to be

1748
01:22:19,240 --> 01:22:22,000
Speaker 3: cut is because there was just knuck a lipsy Like seriously,

1749
01:22:23,160 --> 01:22:27,000
Speaker 3: I'm like, you're sleeping whiles sleeping, you can't possibly.

1750
01:22:26,960 --> 01:22:28,599
Speaker 2: If there was a quiet bit of time, you know,

1751
01:22:29,280 --> 01:22:32,880
Speaker 2: perhaps reas doing homeschooling, Junior's having a nap. I'll take

1752
01:22:32,920 --> 01:22:35,639
Speaker 2: the moment to reset, have a bit of a nap,

1753
01:22:35,680 --> 01:22:38,040
Speaker 2: you know, even if it's five ten minutes. Jared will

1754
01:22:38,040 --> 01:22:40,800
Speaker 2: take that five to ten minutes to clean something. So

1755
01:22:41,800 --> 01:22:44,439
Speaker 2: going on, he's the one he'll be like, oh my gosh,

1756
01:22:44,520 --> 01:22:48,440
Speaker 2: that that window. Let me clean the window, which is

1757
01:22:48,479 --> 01:22:49,960
Speaker 2: something I'm very grateful for.

1758
01:22:49,960 --> 01:22:51,120
Speaker 3: We've got a very clean house.

1759
01:22:53,160 --> 01:22:57,880
Speaker 2: I'm very and tidy. Jared's very pedantic when.

1760
01:22:57,760 --> 01:23:00,720
Speaker 1: It comes to your procrastic clean services.

1761
01:23:00,920 --> 01:23:03,280
Speaker 3: Yeah. I've loosened up in the last two years with life.

1762
01:23:04,680 --> 01:23:07,120
Speaker 2: Had no visitors, so you know, yeah, I'm sure the

1763
01:23:07,160 --> 01:23:08,880
Speaker 2: cushions aren't up right upstairs.

1764
01:23:09,640 --> 01:23:16,240
Speaker 1: That's because of the fucking biscuit babe. That's very last question,

1765
01:23:16,479 --> 01:23:17,839
Speaker 1: what is your favorite quote.

1766
01:23:18,080 --> 01:23:21,080
Speaker 3: Look this like I love I love a good quote.

1767
01:23:21,080 --> 01:23:23,519
Speaker 3: I love other people's quotes more than you know, our

1768
01:23:23,680 --> 01:23:25,840
Speaker 3: repetitive one. But the one we seed to go back

1769
01:23:25,880 --> 01:23:29,200
Speaker 3: to a lot is people's opinions none of your business,

1770
01:23:29,520 --> 01:23:31,200
Speaker 3: nor should you make them yours.

1771
01:23:31,320 --> 01:23:34,280
Speaker 1: I love that one so much and so important now

1772
01:23:34,280 --> 01:23:37,519
Speaker 1: that I feel like the scale of opinion expression has

1773
01:23:37,560 --> 01:23:40,920
Speaker 1: gone up exponentially in the last couple of us, Like

1774
01:23:40,960 --> 01:23:44,360
Speaker 1: it's just opinion central. So I think that's such a good.

1775
01:23:45,680 --> 01:23:48,679
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, I respect everyone's got an opinion, whether

1776
01:23:48,720 --> 01:23:50,960
Speaker 3: that be about the current environment that we're living in,

1777
01:23:51,200 --> 01:23:53,559
Speaker 3: but it's none of my business.

1778
01:23:54,720 --> 01:23:57,280
Speaker 1: Well, guys, thank you so much for this. I cannot

1779
01:23:57,280 --> 01:23:59,120
Speaker 1: believe how long I've chewed your ear off. This is

1780
01:23:59,120 --> 01:24:00,840
Speaker 1: like double the length of a normal episode. But you

1781
01:24:00,840 --> 01:24:05,960
Speaker 1: were just so amazing, so kind and generous, and I

1782
01:24:06,000 --> 01:24:07,519
Speaker 1: love you guys, even more than I did before.

1783
01:24:07,560 --> 01:24:11,320
Speaker 3: Thank you so much, Thanks so much, and we'll see

1784
01:24:11,360 --> 01:24:12,000
Speaker 3: you at the park.

1785
01:24:12,360 --> 01:24:13,880
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1786
01:24:13,960 --> 01:24:16,479
Speaker 1: I really think this is one of my favorite episodes ever,

1787
01:24:16,800 --> 01:24:19,280
Speaker 1: partly because of how exciting it is to sit down

1788
01:24:19,280 --> 01:24:21,759
Speaker 1: with someone who's never told their story this way before.

1789
01:24:21,800 --> 01:24:24,599
Speaker 1: It was such a privilege. They were both so nervous,

1790
01:24:24,600 --> 01:24:27,320
Speaker 1: but they did so well. I often say after these

1791
01:24:27,360 --> 01:24:29,320
Speaker 1: episodes that I just want to spend more time with

1792
01:24:29,400 --> 01:24:32,000
Speaker 1: our guest and be around their energy and just absorb

1793
01:24:32,080 --> 01:24:34,400
Speaker 1: all their wisdom. And the Dads are just like that.

1794
01:24:34,800 --> 01:24:36,599
Speaker 1: If you follow them already you'll know what I mean.

1795
01:24:36,720 --> 01:24:38,280
Speaker 1: In fact, if you didn't follow them already, but you

1796
01:24:38,320 --> 01:24:40,479
Speaker 1: listen to this episode, I'm sure you'll know what I mean.

1797
01:24:40,880 --> 01:24:43,720
Speaker 1: They're just so funny and self deprecating and you'll want

1798
01:24:43,760 --> 01:24:46,439
Speaker 1: to be their best friend. But they're also really on

1799
01:24:46,479 --> 01:24:49,000
Speaker 1: a serious note, flying the flag for the non traditional

1800
01:24:49,000 --> 01:24:53,240
Speaker 1: family structure and reminding how love really does conquer all.

1801
01:24:53,880 --> 01:24:56,080
Speaker 1: If you don't already, do yourself as a favor and

1802
01:24:56,120 --> 01:24:58,320
Speaker 1: please go and follow Real Dads of Melbourne. The link

1803
01:24:58,360 --> 01:25:00,320
Speaker 1: to their Instagram and spelling and all the unders scores

1804
01:25:00,360 --> 01:25:03,120
Speaker 1: is in the show notes. And if you enjoyed listening along,

1805
01:25:03,200 --> 01:25:05,759
Speaker 1: give them an early Christmas prosy and share the episode

1806
01:25:05,760 --> 01:25:08,840
Speaker 1: and any of your thoughts or takeaways, tagging them and us,

1807
01:25:09,200 --> 01:25:11,760
Speaker 1: Especially given that it's their first time, I would love

1808
01:25:11,840 --> 01:25:14,360
Speaker 1: to show them how much impact this episode has made,

1809
01:25:14,520 --> 01:25:17,640
Speaker 1: particularly given that the dad's only found out about surrogacy

1810
01:25:17,720 --> 01:25:20,439
Speaker 1: through a TV show and a conversation there, and perhaps

1811
01:25:20,520 --> 01:25:22,880
Speaker 1: this conversation can be that for some of the other

1812
01:25:22,920 --> 01:25:26,479
Speaker 1: families listening. So if you did have any takeaways, find

1813
01:25:26,479 --> 01:25:28,840
Speaker 1: out anything new, or have anything to share, please do

1814
01:25:29,000 --> 01:25:30,880
Speaker 1: let them know and share it because it means so

1815
01:25:30,960 --> 01:25:33,280
Speaker 1: much to our guests, and I just I love them

1816
01:25:33,280 --> 01:25:35,240
Speaker 1: so much and I want them to know that them

1817
01:25:35,320 --> 01:25:37,799
Speaker 1: get doing their very first podcast really did make a difference.

1818
01:25:38,360 --> 01:25:40,400
Speaker 1: We may squeeze in one more quick yeays of our

1819
01:25:40,400 --> 01:25:43,040
Speaker 1: lives with Ange before Chrissy, but if things go pear

1820
01:25:43,080 --> 01:25:45,280
Speaker 1: shaped as they seem to be already going with this

1821
01:25:45,520 --> 01:25:48,880
Speaker 1: he who must not be named Omicron, I hope you

1822
01:25:48,880 --> 01:25:51,200
Speaker 1: guys are all okay. So if I don't see you

1823
01:25:51,280 --> 01:25:53,160
Speaker 1: before then or speak to you before, then have the

1824
01:25:53,200 --> 01:25:56,479
Speaker 1: most aazing first of season and New Year, no matter

1825
01:25:56,520 --> 01:25:59,880
Speaker 1: how or what you're celebrating, Stay safe and hold your

1826
01:26:00,040 --> 01:26:02,880
Speaker 1: loved ones very tight, and I'll see you next year.

1827
01:26:02,920 --> 01:26:04,880
Speaker 1: And if we do squeeze in another episode, this was

1828
01:26:04,920 --> 01:26:07,599
Speaker 1: a really awkward preemptive good bites, like when you say

1829
01:26:07,600 --> 01:26:09,559
Speaker 1: goodbye to your friend and then you both walk in

1830
01:26:09,600 --> 01:26:11,720
Speaker 1: the same direction, which happens all the time, that would

1831
01:26:11,720 --> 01:26:13,800
Speaker 1: be very awkward. But yes, I hope you guys are

1832
01:26:13,800 --> 01:26:15,760
Speaker 1: having a wonderful week no matter what happens, and are

1833
01:26:15,760 --> 01:26:16,640
Speaker 1: seizing your yea