Speaker 1: You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast.
Speaker 2: Hello, and welcome to MoMA Mia out loud.
Speaker 3: I was just noticed that it's Friday the thirteenth. I
Speaker 3: was all like, very woot about everything and very upbeat,
Speaker 3: and now I'm like, oh, how is it the thirteenth
Speaker 3: on a Friday.
Speaker 2: We don't like that.
Speaker 4: It was Friday the thirteenth last month too.
Speaker 2: Something's happening.
Speaker 4: This is a haunted year. Yeah, we will.
Speaker 2: Endeavor to keep the demons at bay. On today's show.
Speaker 2: My name is Holly wayIn Wright. My name is EMM Vernon.
Speaker 4: In the script it says my name's Esse Stephens, but I'm.
Speaker 3: Not hopefully out louders already today you have heard our
Speaker 3: Jesse Stephens because we're dropping this on a Friday, as
Speaker 3: we always do. But you also already got a little trere,
Speaker 3: which was Jesse Stephens's story all about the birth of
Speaker 3: her twins. So if you haven't listened to that and
Speaker 3: you're interested, please do. If you're not interested, that's fine.
Speaker 4: That's absolutely.
Speaker 5: It was more for her.
Speaker 4: She wanted to yell to share some stuff went down,
Speaker 4: and the out louders need to know.
Speaker 2: Good point anyway, here on our twin free show, except
Speaker 2: not because Claire's with us. Anyway. Here's what's made our
Speaker 2: agenda for today good news.
Speaker 5: For the emotional girlies like myself.
Speaker 2: We no longer need to listen to the boy bosses
Speaker 2: of the world because it actually is okay to cry
Speaker 2: at work?
Speaker 5: Oh is it?
Speaker 4: And how do you implement an opening shift in your
Speaker 4: morning routine to just make your day a bit more
Speaker 4: organized and calmer.
Speaker 3: Recommendations are going to include a TV show that everyone
Speaker 3: is telling me to watch and now including I am. Yes,
Speaker 3: Claire has an excellent.
Speaker 2: Book and I might just have the perfect background watch.
Speaker 3: For Saturday morning cleaning. You know how you got to
Speaker 3: do chores on Saturday mornings, do you?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Some of us do. Some of us do.
Speaker 4: I love having the TV on and then folding washing,
Speaker 4: but I'm really watching the TV.
Speaker 3: I've got you, I've got you with my reco today.
Speaker 3: But first look, it's the Oscars on Monday. We're going
Speaker 3: to do a special little Oscar segment on the Monday
Speaker 3: Show on Monday afternoon. But if you want to sound
Speaker 3: like you know what you're talking about over the weekend
Speaker 3: when you're hanging out with people, we have some very
Speaker 3: stupid predictions for you about what's going to happen. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and you can take them on you cannot. You can
Speaker 3: hold them against us on Monday afternoon.
Speaker 2: It's fine. We don't care. First one that I.
Speaker 3: Predict everyone at the Oscars party will be dressed really boring.
Speaker 2: You know, there's no color anymore. Everyone's just wearing.
Speaker 3: Black, beige, whatever until the Vanity Fair party, Yes, when
Speaker 3: everyone will be naked.
Speaker 5: So annoying. I wish they dressed like that for the
Speaker 5: actual Oscars.
Speaker 4: I do think naked is encroaching on formal events. I
Speaker 4: think that they I think we could have some nudity
Speaker 4: I hope.
Speaker 1: So.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it makes things more interesting, especially if it's the
Speaker 2: guys the Grammys and Justin Bieber's just performing in his Yeah,
Speaker 2: maybe we could see that from Challa mate. Maybe he
Speaker 2: just tries to claw back his reputation by turning up
Speaker 2: on the red carpet in orange boxes. Yeah and a
Speaker 2: bow tie.
Speaker 4: We already saw his bottom in his movie we did.
Speaker 3: Everyone will be very very thin. We already know that, right.
Speaker 3: We are in the era of the skinny skinniness, so
Speaker 3: we'll be like naked and skinny. I predict that Kylie
Speaker 3: won't walk with Timothy because the vibes are bad. Now,
Speaker 3: I think she's not going to do that.
Speaker 2: You know what one of my Kylie predictions is is
Speaker 2: that because the F one movie is also nominated, Lewis
Speaker 2: Hamilton's going to come with Kim Kardashian to the Vanity
Speaker 2: Fair party for sure. For sure with his plus one
Speaker 2: Kim Kardashian and the sisters will have to sit next
Speaker 2: to each other.
Speaker 4: Okay, my question about Lewis Hamilton will he be like?
Speaker 4: Is he associated?
Speaker 2: He's a producer on that film that and that film
Speaker 2: is one of the best Oscar nominations because you know,
Speaker 2: now they have a longer list so that they can
Speaker 2: pretend that they're being inclusive to movies that people actually
Speaker 2: want to go and watch. And he did pretty well
Speaker 2: in Ferrari last week, so feeling good about himself. You
Speaker 2: might be right about that, could be doing that.
Speaker 4: I really like that. I do like when my celebrities
Speaker 4: pop up where I least expect them, really enjoy that.
Speaker 3: I predict we'll be excessively excited about our two Australian nominations,
Speaker 3: which are for mister or Lordie.
Speaker 2: I predict he will be tall.
Speaker 4: Yes, I think he'll be tall and sexy.
Speaker 2: Probably go with his mom because that's his vibe. Very Leo.
Speaker 4: So even though he's bloody dating that girl supermodel, Yeah,
Speaker 4: who's got naughty parents?
Speaker 5: Anyway, her fault.
Speaker 4: She want a university college admission scan.
Speaker 2: No, I remember that. Yes, she was one of the
Speaker 2: colins and he's dating her.
Speaker 4: She's really pretty.
Speaker 2: Maybe he'll get a new haircut like Margo, because Margo
Speaker 2: has like signaled Wuthering Heights is done with a bob.
Speaker 3: She chopped it out, chopped off. Jacob might shave his head.
Speaker 3: We're going to get to shave.
Speaker 2: Roseburn obviously is also nominated. She's not going to win.
Speaker 2: No offense. Burn, I think you're second in line. It's probability,
Speaker 2: but I hope there's no lizard convention happening. I husband,
Speaker 2: when she won, was off buying a bearded dragon or something.
Speaker 5: Some reptils shouldn't be a pet.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I definitely shouldn't. He might have been eaten by it.
Speaker 2: He definitely won't be there. That may serve him right.
Speaker 3: Conan O'Brien is hosting. I predict he'll be funny, but
Speaker 3: no one there as funny as Nicki Glazer at.
Speaker 2: The Golden Globe.
Speaker 4: No, because Nikki crosses the line and that's what I want.
Speaker 4: I hope Conan O'Brien makes some current jokes, some ballet
Speaker 4: jokes made, some ballet jokes.
Speaker 3: I reckon, we might get ballet jokes, but I reckon,
Speaker 3: we won't get politics. I think we won't get politics.
Speaker 3: And I also think they're going to be like super
Speaker 3: happy on the censor button after everything that's happened recently.
Speaker 3: With that, it'll be like giving Kyle and Jackiel a
Speaker 3: run for their money on the like, can't say that,
Speaker 3: can say that?
Speaker 2: What do you mean? I say, very true, lots of that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I reckon so my predictions, And I will
Speaker 4: caveat this by saying I'm going off vibes only because
Speaker 4: I've only seen a handful of the movie. I'm only
Speaker 4: going off vibes. One battle after another is gonna win
Speaker 4: Best Picture. But that pisses me off because I've already
Speaker 4: seen that movie. I haven't seen that movie, but I've
Speaker 4: seen that movie.
Speaker 3: What you mean, Yes, you're like, that's a movie the
Speaker 3: type of which I have already seen.
Speaker 2: Paul Thomas Anderson.
Speaker 4: Correct, and even the titles boring. It's like one battle
Speaker 4: after another, like.
Speaker 5: You know what I mean, Like it is true, like
Speaker 5: you have a battle and then there will be another one.
Speaker 4: I guess I just like Sinners needs that like originality,
Speaker 4: it trumps it every single time. I do think Timmy
Speaker 4: won't win Best Act out he needs a bit of
Speaker 4: Leo where you've just got to be patient, mate, Lea,
Speaker 4: Like he's gonna.
Speaker 2: Sit there Leo again.
Speaker 3: See what are the people I always feel sorry for
Speaker 3: is when you're in the awards circuit but you're definitely
Speaker 3: not gonna win. So for example, Emma Stone is nominated
Speaker 3: this year, it's not her year. No one's even pretending
Speaker 3: it's her year. She's already won it, so that's fine,
Speaker 3: but like.
Speaker 2: She still has to go. She does put the dress on,
Speaker 2: but no one thinks, not even one person, not even
Speaker 2: pull the dead octopus thinks.
Speaker 5: Not even no.
Speaker 2: So it's like and that Leah must be feeling a
Speaker 2: bit like that because he's not gonna win, and he
Speaker 2: hasn't been attending some of them. But no, I think
Speaker 2: Michael B. Jordan is going to win Best Actor.
Speaker 3: Can I tell you that I asked the Maths people
Speaker 3: at one of those proper Hollywood people things said Michael B.
Speaker 3: Jordan by a whisker they put apparently they like crunched
Speaker 3: all the numbers, blah blah, mats blah blah.
Speaker 2: Michael B.
Speaker 3: Jordan's thirty three point two and Timothy thirty one point three,
Speaker 3: so he's just gonna pip him.
Speaker 2: Well. My unpopular opinion is that he actually should have
Speaker 2: been nominated twice because he played twins and.
Speaker 4: He would know very well.
Speaker 5: Twins are different people. They are.
Speaker 2: They are.
Speaker 4: Like two different people. One was hot, yeah, one with.
Speaker 5: Dimples, the other one didn't have dimples.
Speaker 2: If they had done that nominated him twice, it's like
Speaker 2: Michael B. Jordan, that's for rolling Michael. Fair advantage, but
Speaker 2: also maybe fair fantasy. My I have a next year prediction,
Speaker 2: So I don't think Timothy will win this year. He
Speaker 2: was nominated last year as well. He's becoming and it's.
Speaker 5: Sad but it's fine.
Speaker 2: But I do think Kylie Jenner will win next year
Speaker 2: for Best Supporting Actress in Charlie XCX's mockumentary The Moment. Yes,
Speaker 2: I have, because I saw a clip of that yesterday
Speaker 2: in which Kylie Jenner was.
Speaker 4: Ex I've heard he's really good.
Speaker 5: But she's better than Anyone's.
Speaker 2: A good movie. It's really good. I really enjoyed it.
Speaker 2: It's been fifty to fifty some of to Wuthering Heights.
Speaker 2: People either love it or hate it. Alexander scars Guard
Speaker 2: in it. It's really good.
Speaker 5: But Kylie er steals a show.
Speaker 2: I'd watch him do anything.
Speaker 4: I want to see the rupture between Timothy and Kylie.
Speaker 5: By Timothy so great.
Speaker 3: My last is K Pop Demon Hunters, right, yeah, so
Speaker 3: they're going to win the Best Animated Feature. But they
Speaker 3: also perfer which I just love wow because they're cartoons
Speaker 3: but also a real band. So it really confuses people,
Speaker 3: particularly the old people in the crowd are just like,
Speaker 3: I don't understand. And speaking of Leo, what's funny to
Speaker 3: me as a gen xer is when you see him
Speaker 3: in awards shows now he looks more and more like
Speaker 3: Jack Nicholson did at award shows when I was young.
Speaker 3: So he's like the old guy now, like just making
Speaker 3: jokes and leaning back in his show. Like and it's
Speaker 3: like we've watched him go from.
Speaker 2: Like cool young guy to sad old guy. He doesn't
Speaker 2: know what front he was there the Golden gloves.
Speaker 5: He was like the K pop people, I don't get
Speaker 5: it anyway.
Speaker 3: They will also make sure that no demons infiltrate the event,
Speaker 3: which is gonna be handy.
Speaker 2: We've all had a cry at work, so whether it's
Speaker 2: in the bathroom, in the car park, on the train home,
Speaker 2: that the part of the corner in the office that
Speaker 2: no one really goes to a cause a crying corner. However,
Speaker 2: there's been a general consensus that're crying at work publicly
Speaker 2: in front of your manager or colleagues is unprofessional until now.
Speaker 2: Robert Half conducted a survey about crying in the workplace
Speaker 2: Very Important work, and they surveyed more than two thousand
Speaker 2: c suite leaders. Forty four percent of CFO say that
Speaker 2: occasional workplace cry is acceptable. Thirty percent believe crying at
Speaker 2: work has no negative impact. So when I finished university
Speaker 2: and I was looking for jobs, the only people I
Speaker 2: had to kind of help me were my parents' generation
Speaker 2: because they are the only people who I knew worked,
Speaker 2: and they were like, you have to wear this, you
Speaker 2: have to talk like this, you must must must not
Speaker 2: cry at work.
Speaker 4: I love the exactly because because they're like just an f.
Speaker 2: Really emotional. You can't cry at work. And then I
Speaker 2: started working at Mama Maya.
Speaker 4: And you're like, hmm, mixed messages.
Speaker 5: A lot is going on.
Speaker 2: I actually have a story, Klus Stevenson.
Speaker 4: Did What did I do when you were.
Speaker 2: Editor in chief and Mom Maya and I was a
Speaker 2: social media producer. It was I totally remember what the
Speaker 2: meeting is, but it was some sort of formal check
Speaker 2: in because we didn't have regular check in, so it
Speaker 2: was a formal check in. And I was like, I'm
Speaker 2: going to own this meeting. I'm going to talk about
Speaker 2: all this stuff. I did everything I've done. I'm so
Speaker 2: good at my job. I'm the best. And I get
Speaker 2: into the meeting and I was like, and then I
Speaker 2: did this post and I got this amount of engagement,
Speaker 2: and then I did this, and then everyone seemed to
Speaker 2: like this, and I.
Speaker 5: Could feel the tears well up because it was the first.
Speaker 2: Time I had to talk about some of the achievements
Speaker 2: I made at work, and I don't know why. And
Speaker 2: then the streams just started happening, and you were crying,
Speaker 2: even though you were like saying good things about I
Speaker 2: was crying saying good things about myself, ignoring the tears,
Speaker 2: and then eventually it was just sobbing, and I was like,
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry, I don't know what's happening. I never
Speaker 2: cry at work, and you were just looking at your
Speaker 2: computer and you were like, I'll find everyone. And then
Speaker 2: it was like the moment where I was like, oh
Speaker 2: my god, this is so liberating as a woman, as
Speaker 2: a young woman in media. And then I just kept
Speaker 2: crying and kept talking and we both had a discussion
Speaker 2: ignoring my dear, and it was the best meeting I've
Speaker 2: ever had. Wow, Claus Stevens, I want to know.
Speaker 3: I want to know from you, because that was one
Speaker 3: of the things a manager is how to react when
Speaker 3: people cry. How did you? How did you get to
Speaker 3: a place where you were comfory enough to just let
Speaker 3: them sit there sobbing.
Speaker 4: I struggle with that because I am not a touchy
Speaker 4: feely person. I'm not an overly sentimental person. So sometimes
Speaker 4: I'd be like should I hug this person? And then
Speaker 4: I'd think that's inauthentic, and they're going to know it's inauthentic,
Speaker 4: and it's going to be clunky and clumsy, and I
Speaker 4: don't want to be hugged when I'm crying I having
Speaker 4: the meeting that I really needed exactly, And I knew
Speaker 4: that the reason I cried at work would always be
Speaker 4: when I had these big feelings, and they might be
Speaker 4: I might be feeling nervous, angry. Often for me, it
Speaker 4: was when I felt angry about something or I wanted
Speaker 4: to express something. And I don't think I was ever
Speaker 4: taught to be assertive, so even in that situation, it's
Speaker 4: like you're never taught to like talk yourself up, So
Speaker 4: then when you do it, the emotion is overwhelming and
Speaker 4: you start crying and you're like, this is no one's fault,
Speaker 4: this is anything. I just don't know how to get
Speaker 4: this out. So I was always like, I just want
Speaker 4: to be ignored to you.
Speaker 3: So I was going to ask, is how you want
Speaker 3: to be treated when you cry? Because there are different reasons,
Speaker 3: Right if EMM was crying because she was upset about
Speaker 3: something at.
Speaker 2: Work, would your reaction be different or do you just
Speaker 2: generally let's all agree, I can't see your tears, I
Speaker 2: can't see your shaking shoulders, and I'm just going to
Speaker 2: pretend like nothing's happening. Is that what you're advocating?
Speaker 4: It probably also makes it weird that as a journalist, writer, interviewer,
Speaker 4: you interview people who cry, and it's you're not meant to.
Speaker 4: If you stopped the interview every time people cried and
Speaker 4: gave them a cuddle, that's not very good interview technique.
Speaker 4: I don't think.
Speaker 3: Well, no, the idea is to let them cry because
Speaker 3: a they need to get through that to get to
Speaker 3: the next bit, and also because it's quite good content sometimes.
Speaker 3: But at the same time, I think it's situation dependent
Speaker 3: because if someone's genuinely very upset, then you need to
Speaker 3: comfort them. You need to be a human being and
Speaker 3: comfort them.
Speaker 4: But do you have to hug them?
Speaker 3: But if you know that some people are just criers,
Speaker 3: I think that's one of the skills in being a
Speaker 3: manager is you can't actually treat everybody the same. Like
Speaker 3: if somebody cried in your office who you knew was
Speaker 3: not a crier and you knew something must be wrong,
Speaker 3: then you would like inquire.
Speaker 4: See M wasn't a crier. But I think I could relate. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I was like, yeah, same. I cried when my leave
Speaker 4: didn't get approved and I just got very overwhelmed because
Speaker 4: I was like, but I wanted to go to Hawaii.
Speaker 2: Those are the worst. Those are the worst ones as
Speaker 2: a manager to deal with this. If you're just saying no,
Speaker 2: you can't have leave then because everyone's having leave then
Speaker 2: and someone starts crying. For God's sake, sorry, welcome to
Speaker 2: being a grown up in the world. And I would
Speaker 2: rather die than let people see me cry. I'm that
Speaker 2: person because I'm stoic and I'm old. But I have
Speaker 2: done it, of course. Am oh, yeah, I definitely have
Speaker 2: done it. Whereas I know some people who are much
Speaker 2: more of old than I am, and they're like fine
Speaker 2: with crying, but I hate it. So I early in
Speaker 2: my career literally researched how did not cry when you
Speaker 2: want to cry? That's that's going to make me cry?
Speaker 3: They give you some good advice, right, So, pinch between
Speaker 3: your four finger and thumb, that's a really good one.
Speaker 3: Drink a glass of really cold water because that cool
Speaker 3: things down. Like you know how when you feel you're
Speaker 3: going to cry, a whole body goes hot and you
Speaker 3: start getting I hate that feeling.
Speaker 2: So if you've got water around and you can swallow
Speaker 2: and like or just throw the water at anything, but cry,
Speaker 2: Just like what was I doing?
Speaker 5: Have I slipped.
Speaker 2: I gotta go to the loop, create a distraction, look
Speaker 2: like a labor and then you write not cry clays
Speaker 2: crying over there, and I'm like, what, I'm fine, Exit.
Speaker 3: Then anywhere, go anywhere where the crying closet needs to
Speaker 3: throw the people out of the crying closet, go in there,
Speaker 3: shut the door, lean against the door to sob because
Speaker 3: then if people come to see if you're all right,
Speaker 3: that's the worst, because you know how if you're crying
Speaker 3: and people go you're right and give you a hug,
Speaker 3: you just cry off.
Speaker 2: And then it should just be agreed upon that no
Speaker 2: one references it ever, like we do not talk about it.
Speaker 5: It's done.
Speaker 4: But all of this assumes, strangely, and again it must
Speaker 4: be a British thing that there's a gap between you
Speaker 4: feeling the emotion and you expressing that emotion. There is
Speaker 4: no gap for me. There's no time to get to
Speaker 4: the closet.
Speaker 2: You have to run, Yeah, there's no time.
Speaker 4: I'm just I'm crying before I even know that I'm crying.
Speaker 3: Do you think if you cry in front of somebody,
Speaker 3: do you expect them to like, what do you expect
Speaker 3: them to do?
Speaker 2: Literally? Ignore it?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I wouldn't want I mean, of course, it depends
Speaker 4: what you're crying about. I cried one time I got
Speaker 4: really sad news at work, and I cried, but I
Speaker 4: had enough time where the tears had started. Then I
Speaker 4: went for a walk. But if you're crying because of
Speaker 4: like anger assertiveness, I've got big feelings. I don't know
Speaker 4: what to do with them. Then no, I don't want
Speaker 4: to be comforted. I want to maybe be left alone. No, no,
Speaker 4: because I want to argue.
Speaker 2: With someone who's crying. Though.
Speaker 3: The other tip I got that is really stupid is
Speaker 3: if you tilt your head back, the tears can't actually fall.
Speaker 2: Oh you tilt forward, so then they drop on the
Speaker 2: ground so it doesn't ruin your mind. Yeah, if you
Speaker 2: tilt your head back, then you can just be like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I can imagine just looking at you in a meeting room,
Speaker 2: going is she have any exorcism?
Speaker 6: Water?
Speaker 4: Some really really weird. But I remember one time I
Speaker 4: was meant to be disciplining someone for something. But the
Speaker 4: reason I cry often is when I'm trying to be
Speaker 4: assertive and direct because I just don't think I have
Speaker 4: the skills to do that. I think I've gotten a
Speaker 4: little bit better, but I find it really really hard.
Speaker 4: So I was trying to be assertive and say, like,
Speaker 4: you did this thing. It's okay, but you did this thing.
Speaker 4: And then they yelled at me, and then I cried.
Speaker 4: Oh no, they were fine. They were absolutely.
Speaker 2: That's something as a boss.
Speaker 3: If you make somebody cry, you feel awful because and
Speaker 3: you never mean to make someone cry. But if you've
Speaker 3: got to impart bad news like you know, you did
Speaker 3: do this thing wrong, or you know, or more serious
Speaker 3: news than that, you know, you're letting them go whatever,
Speaker 3: which have done all of those things. If they start crying,
Speaker 3: then it's immediately you made me cry, And that's a
Speaker 3: really difficult position to be. Heah yeah, and then the
Speaker 3: only thing I've ever learned to do is to give
Speaker 3: it time and quiet and down and breathe and.
Speaker 2: Pass them tissues and throw water in their face. Throw
Speaker 2: water in their face, created destruction. That would have been great,
Speaker 2: I would have been. Can you imagine hr out there?
Speaker 2: She threw water at me and told me to tell
Speaker 2: my head back, and then she started pinching my.
Speaker 4: Finger out louders in a moment. How you can completely
Speaker 4: revamp your morning routine with an Opening Shift.
Speaker 6: Hi out Louders, It's mea, and there are some cracking
Speaker 6: out loud subscribe episodes for you this week. On Tuesday's episode,
Speaker 6: I did a bit of a diary note because I
Speaker 6: had a lot of feelings and I had to put
Speaker 6: them somewhere, so I put them into a microphone in
Speaker 6: the tiniest studio that I could find. It's just me
Speaker 6: on a microphone, giving you a bit of insight into
Speaker 6: the last week. And then on Thursday, I grabbed one
Speaker 6: Amelia Lester and we sat down and talked about female friendship,
Speaker 6: our friendship, but through the lens of this great new
Speaker 6: book I'm reading called Let Them by Meil Robbins, particularly
Speaker 6: the friendship chapter up, because it did actually blow my mind.
Speaker 6: So if you want to hear us, and you're not
Speaker 6: already a subscriber, if you want to hear my diary
Speaker 6: and my conversation with Amelia, follow the link in the
Speaker 6: show notes and get me in your ears.
Speaker 4: There's a new trend on TikTok encouraging people to apply
Speaker 4: the concept of an opening shift to their mornings for
Speaker 4: a calmer, more organized day.
Speaker 5: Now.
Speaker 4: I've worked many a job in my time, and I've
Speaker 4: done many different kinds of opening and closing shifts. So
Speaker 4: I worked at Boosjuice. It was very important to do
Speaker 4: all the prep, Yeah, to cut all the fruit and
Speaker 4: stock up the juices and fill up the ice, like
Speaker 4: get everything ready so that you didn't then panic when
Speaker 4: you had one customer. I also worked at the video
Speaker 4: shop and you'd process the return.
Speaker 5: What a good job?
Speaker 4: Who It was a vibe A job doesn't exist anymore,
Speaker 4: I know. And it was like you'd rotate the stock
Speaker 4: and you'd like put a movie on. It was so good.
Speaker 4: And then at a bar or restaurant that I worked out,
Speaker 4: you'd fold the napkins and polish the cutlery, all of that.
Speaker 4: So an opening shift morning routine can be anything from
Speaker 4: making your bed because you're just you're thinking ahead. You're
Speaker 4: just planning the day meal, prepping your lunch, stretching, journaling
Speaker 4: a sunrise walk. I know, this is all very holy.
Speaker 4: I can see you doing that. According to an article
Speaker 4: in Every Girl by Catherine Chang, she says, your opening
Speaker 4: shift routine should leave you feeling organized, clear headed, and
Speaker 4: up for tackling whatever the day brings, which is exactly
Speaker 4: how I feel about my mornings. I need to know
Speaker 4: your opening shifts and what does yours look like?
Speaker 2: Okay, here we go. Alarm goes off at six thirty am.
Speaker 4: That's so ambitious.
Speaker 5: I get out of bed at seven forty five, which
Speaker 5: is improvement to my eight p fifteen.
Speaker 2: What are we doing between six thirty and seven? Can
Speaker 2: we going back to sleep?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: I'm just kind of like because if I go back
Speaker 2: to sleep, then it affects my quartersole levels, so I
Speaker 2: can't do you know that as a fact.
Speaker 5: No, I've been told that Hub themIn Bro guy, I
Speaker 5: believe that. So I just kind of stay.
Speaker 2: Awake, like, roll around, look at my ceiling, scroll on Instagram,
Speaker 2: and then I get out of bed at seven forty five.
Speaker 2: Immediately make my bed because I've been told that's how
Speaker 2: you're meant to start your day. I then shower, if
Speaker 2: it's a shower day. Every second day it is a
Speaker 2: shower day. Brush my teeth, do my skincare, have my
Speaker 2: coffee in my kitchen, choose what I'm wearing, then not
Speaker 2: like it, so then re choose what I'm wearing. Then
Speaker 2: I chose it.
Speaker 5: Now I think it's probably about like.
Speaker 2: Eightish, okay, and then I check Slack and look at
Speaker 2: my email, look for some pictures because I leave those
Speaker 2: for last minute for the podcast. I make some toast
Speaker 2: or a smoothie or some scrambled eggs because I'm so
Speaker 2: luxurious scrambled eggs. I love scrambled eck and then toilet.
Speaker 2: Spend quite some time nexcause I've had my coffee. Remember, yes,
Speaker 2: I got affected.
Speaker 4: Got affected at the.
Speaker 2: Time, and then I leave and walk to work at
Speaker 2: around eight thirty. I grabbed my second coffee on the
Speaker 2: way to work, and then I get to work around
Speaker 2: eight point fifty, which is like my social time, see
Speaker 2: my friends, and then ten minutes of chitty chat.
Speaker 5: Yeah, ten minutes of fun time. That's pretty good.
Speaker 2: You squeezed a lot into an hour there, and then
Speaker 2: I get to work a night. However, I do need
Speaker 2: to talk about another routine I did this week, because
Speaker 2: this week I did my mom's morning routine for the
Speaker 2: first time ever. I stayed with my parents for a
Speaker 2: week day because I had to drive my car to
Speaker 2: my parents' house and my dad can take you to
Speaker 2: the mechanic. She couldn't possibly take no, no, no, no no job.
Speaker 5: So I stayed the night on my parents. Okay, five
Speaker 5: point forty five. I'm up no gym time with my mom.
Speaker 1: My.
Speaker 2: Mum goes to the gym downstairs in her apartment complex.
Speaker 5: We then shower. Cashi showers over, so we had to
Speaker 5: go through a shower.
Speaker 2: Well, she works out every day, Yeah yeah, but like
Speaker 2: this is interesting for her. She lays her clothes out
Speaker 2: the night before and I didn't come with anything because
Speaker 2: I wasn't gonna spend the night. So then she laid
Speaker 2: also my clothes out the night before. So then what
Speaker 2: I was wearing on Tuesday is my mom. My mom
Speaker 2: chose my outfit. Then we go to the Metro, so
Speaker 2: Dad drops us off at the Metro. Public transport is
Speaker 2: so busy on a weekday.
Speaker 5: Welcome to the world is insane.
Speaker 2: So what my mom does is she goes backwards to
Speaker 2: go forwards. So she's like, we have to take the
Speaker 2: metro that goes back a stop so we can get
Speaker 2: a seat and then we get back on again.
Speaker 5: So we're sitting down and they we're in the city.
Speaker 5: We're in the city. My ten to eight am. What
Speaker 5: am I gonna do?
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna go to work an hour before everyone
Speaker 2: else like a loser. So I'm like, you have to
Speaker 2: have breakfast for meats, and then we have an hour
Speaker 2: breakfast and then then might work at the same time. Wow,
Speaker 2: So why does she go in so early? Then?
Speaker 5: I don't know.
Speaker 2: I think it's like a mid fifties thing. She loves
Speaker 2: it so much.
Speaker 5: Love it.
Speaker 2: I your morning routine. At the moment shift.
Speaker 4: Looks, Oh, I'm so tired, So no need for an alarm.
Speaker 2: That's lucky todd they tend.
Speaker 4: To be they are the alarm. So Matilda has started
Speaker 4: waking at five quite liably.
Speaker 1: Have we.
Speaker 4: I know they'd have a lovely time toddler. But the
Speaker 4: thing about so she wakes up at five every morning,
Speaker 4: and then the morning that Jesse she went into labor.
Speaker 4: Then she had a sea section. Jesse messaged me at
Speaker 4: five saying I'm about to have the C section come in,
Speaker 4: and Matilda slept in till six, and I'm like, you troll,
Speaker 4: you are so reliable usually so anyway, I missed it.
Speaker 4: But Rory and I rotate mornings early mornings because we
Speaker 4: both bloody hate them. But on my new office days,
Speaker 4: I do the early start because I've got to be
Speaker 4: out of the house early to take Matilda to daycare
Speaker 4: with a toddler. The more time you have for just
Speaker 4: every step of what you have to do, the better,
Speaker 4: Because putting on shoes is gonna take twenty five minutes. Okay,
Speaker 4: So I try to do a load of washing. I
Speaker 4: have a scroll listen to.
Speaker 5: A load of washing in the morning. Yeah, you just gotta.
Speaker 4: You've just got to stay on top of it. Yeah,
Speaker 4: otherwise otherwise afternoons and nightmare. Yeah. So then I'm listening
Speaker 4: to my ABC podcast. Matilda's yelling at me to play Mmma.
Speaker 4: Around six thirty, I'll have a shower with Matilda, have
Speaker 4: a conversation while we're in the shower. That's lovely. Then
Speaker 4: we wake up dadda and there's a whole song. There's
Speaker 4: a song. We walk into the bedroom singing. So that's
Speaker 4: about six forty five.
Speaker 2: You're this is your first rotation around the bed.
Speaker 5: Yeah, before my alarm goes off.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Then Matilda helps me pick my clothes, helps me
Speaker 4: do my hair and makeup, and then was.
Speaker 5: Very similar to my mom.
Speaker 2: Yeah she's there.
Speaker 4: Yeah, she's like morning and I'm like cannee no. And
Speaker 4: then we go through an a deal because she wants
Speaker 4: to wear her MMMA dress to daycare and I've had
Speaker 4: to lie and say it's not allowed in the building.
Speaker 4: This whole time. By the way, she's walking around with
Speaker 4: toast in both hands, getting it on all walls and surfaces,
Speaker 4: and I'm trying to stop that. Everything that should take
Speaker 4: a minute takes ten. And that's so important. So getting
Speaker 4: from front door to the car ten minutes, getting from
Speaker 4: the car into daycare ten minutes, maybe fifteen or twenty
Speaker 4: on a bad day, because she's got to show me
Speaker 4: they've got a pet, Tommy the turtle, and she's got
Speaker 4: to feed Timmy the turtle, and I've got to watch,
Speaker 4: and she's got to introduce me to her friends.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 4: And then and then I'm on her way.
Speaker 2: To work so emotionally and I'm like, I'm so interested
Speaker 2: in your turtle child.
Speaker 4: How did this? I'm like, oh, how is this?
Speaker 5: She's the big and we're like claires. Five minutes later,
Speaker 5: A yeah.
Speaker 4: And I'm like, sorry, guys.
Speaker 3: The most one of the most viral stories I ever
Speaker 3: wrote for Mama Mao was a story called the Things
Speaker 3: I've Done by nine Am, and I wrote it eleven
Speaker 3: years ago, right, and it's a list.
Speaker 4: So your kids would have been like so then they.
Speaker 3: Would have been yeah, so they would have been like
Speaker 3: three and five, right, And it had things like I have.
Speaker 2: Dealt with three people's pooh this morning, I have stripped Wait,
Speaker 2: who's the other one?
Speaker 7: Mee was minimal involvement, was bad, bad strip, two beds
Speaker 7: and done, two loads of washing, always done, three different
Speaker 7: breaks wait bed because someone's always weed. Oh no, yeah,
Speaker 7: Like there's a lot of that, right, So there's a
Speaker 7: lot of that happening, Three different breakfasts, three different people
Speaker 7: getting dressed, trying to put your make upon it while
Speaker 7: you're t to shove some food in your face, two
Speaker 7: different drop offs.
Speaker 3: I remember the mayhem and falling into the office with
Speaker 3: your coffee. We used to have a nine am meeting them,
Speaker 3: which we still do now, content meeting and just falling
Speaker 3: in there like oh yeah.
Speaker 2: I totally know what's going on, right.
Speaker 3: And it's funny because I'm in such a different season
Speaker 3: now my mornings look so different, but that was my
Speaker 3: life for years.
Speaker 2: And whenever I.
Speaker 3: See moms at MoMA Mia who have just come back
Speaker 3: from matt leave or they've just come back from their
Speaker 3: second one.
Speaker 2: In particular, the look on the I've lived a day
Speaker 2: they have lived a day.
Speaker 3: By the time they get here, I was listening to
Speaker 3: Stacey Hicks, who was one of our hosts on Parenting
Speaker 3: Out Loud, and jeba bath host on True Crame conversations
Speaker 3: in the kitchen this morning, and it sounded exactly like
Speaker 3: what Claire was just disgusting. It was just like and
Speaker 3: then she wouldn't put her shoes on, and then she's
Speaker 3: decided that toast is the devil. And it just like
Speaker 3: it takes me all back because my days are so
Speaker 3: different now, like it's so weird. But for me, I
Speaker 3: have different routines depending on where I am right because
Speaker 3: I am in different places, so my money like different,
Speaker 3: well I do it depends on Monday mornings, I get
Speaker 3: up at five because I have to drive or train
Speaker 3: in so that's a really early day. And this week
Speaker 3: that was particularly hard because we are renovating our bathroom
Speaker 3: and turning a laundry into a bathroom in our house,
Speaker 3: so we have no toilet and no shower. So this
Speaker 3: Monday morning at five am, I was going to the
Speaker 3: toilet in a portoloo in the front garden in the
Speaker 3: pitch black, and then having a shower outside in the
Speaker 3: cold in the pitch black at five am, and I
Speaker 3: was like, this is not what they meant by opening
Speaker 3: shift is treading on snails.
Speaker 2: And anyway, well, you'd rather do that than just skip
Speaker 2: the shower for a day.
Speaker 3: Well, I'm a morning shower person, so I don't shower
Speaker 3: before bed, but I shower every morning to like wake
Speaker 3: myself up right. And I think I would feel on
Speaker 3: a day when I don't have to go anywhere and
Speaker 3: do anything, I can leave that shower till later.
Speaker 2: Maybe I'll do it after I exercise or whatever.
Speaker 3: But on a day when I've got to do something,
Speaker 3: it's like get it out of the way. But anyway,
Speaker 3: my days is different depending on whether or not I'm commuting, obviously,
Speaker 3: but my non negotiable now that I'm in a season
Speaker 3: where I can do it, is a walk every single morning,
Speaker 3: no matter where. I'm not Monday, i lie because obviously
Speaker 3: i'm driving a car on getting.
Speaker 5: On the train.
Speaker 2: But if I'm in Sydney, I'll walk. If I'm at home,
Speaker 2: we walk.
Speaker 3: And the time that Brent and I were able to
Speaker 3: leave the kids in the house in the morning to
Speaker 3: go and walk the dog together was like the biggest
Speaker 3: watershed parenting moment when you can do that because where
Speaker 3: you're at, Claire and why people like you just can't
Speaker 3: even imagine that.
Speaker 4: No, but I'm thinking I used to walk exactly.
Speaker 3: I remember walking and Amber when that was nice. I'm
Speaker 3: walking the dog in the morning and watching the sun
Speaker 3: come up and realizing why are all the when I'm
Speaker 3: in the city and I'm walking, I'm like, where are
Speaker 3: all these people going?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, what time do you do your morning walk? So
Speaker 2: these days seven point thirty okay, eight o'clock. Sometimes at
Speaker 2: home we've got the when the kids are we've got
Speaker 2: their them out the door because we're still like feeding
Speaker 2: them breakfast and making them lunch. And then they get
Speaker 2: on their school bus and go because we live in
Speaker 2: the country.
Speaker 3: So they got on a school bush. We don't have
Speaker 3: to take them, which is awesome. And then when I'm
Speaker 3: here six forty five.
Speaker 5: Oh wow.
Speaker 2: So when I'm here, I set my alarm.
Speaker 3: I'm a snooze person, you know how mel Robins that's
Speaker 3: her non negotiable, you cannot have a snooze alarm. She's
Speaker 3: on bending about morning routine. She says, the minute you
Speaker 3: wake up, you got to get out of bed three
Speaker 3: two one go. I deliberately always set my alarm ten
Speaker 3: minutes early so I can snooze because I.
Speaker 2: Love that feeling of like, oh I've got to wake up.
Speaker 2: Oh no, I don't. I just love that. But you're
Speaker 2: just setting your alarm earlier. No, and then I go
Speaker 2: back to sleep for ten minutes.
Speaker 4: And that ten minutes that makes all the difference.
Speaker 2: But just six twenty alarm, six point thirty, get up,
Speaker 2: get your exercise clothes on, get out the door, walk,
Speaker 2: come back, make up, hair whatever, come in.
Speaker 3: Like that's what I do, and when I don't have
Speaker 3: to deal with the kids. And the thing about the
Speaker 3: morning shift and the idea of setting everything up is lovely,
Speaker 3: but that shift is going to look very different depending
Speaker 3: on what is required of your right. Like I know
Speaker 3: the reason when my kids were little and I'm stripping
Speaker 3: beds and washing things is because you can't walk back
Speaker 3: into a house to a stinky house and you know,
Speaker 3: beds that need doing and all that kind of stuff.
Speaker 2: Whereas later on you can.
Speaker 3: So I think that the problem with all the morning
Speaker 3: TikTok advice is it's very unbending.
Speaker 2: Whereas we all know.
Speaker 3: And our stories have just shown that, like it's pretty
Speaker 3: different depending on what's going on.
Speaker 5: You can't make Matilla do morning shift with charliebor I know.
Speaker 4: I do make her do some closing shift. I say,
Speaker 4: go on, pick up all your toys. Put them away
Speaker 4: so badly, and yet I'm like, you're on clothes.
Speaker 2: Do you reckon?
Speaker 3: I've ever made a change to your morning that's made
Speaker 3: a world of difference to your.
Speaker 4: Day Post COVID, Rory and I got into the morning walks, Yeah,
Speaker 4: because we had moved to Bond Eye, and that was heaven.
Speaker 4: It's just so much clearer. Once we got to work.
Speaker 4: That was when I can't walk.
Speaker 2: I literally feel it. It's not an exercise thing, No,
Speaker 2: it's a head clearing thing. Yeah, you walk to work.
Speaker 5: I do walk to work.
Speaker 2: I think the thing that's changed the most for the
Speaker 2: better has been my morning coffee. When I was living
Speaker 2: with my parents, my sister, me, mom and dad, before
Speaker 2: we all went to work or school, we'd all just
Speaker 2: sit together and have our coffee together. And I didn't
Speaker 2: know how much I appreciated that until I lived alone,
Speaker 2: and then I started just because I lived so close
Speaker 2: to cafes, I would just get my coffee on the
Speaker 2: way into work. Now I got my own coffee machine,
Speaker 2: so I make my coffee in the morning and I
Speaker 2: just sit on my couch and like drink my coffee
Speaker 2: and don't do anything else.
Speaker 5: And I love that. I mean, you probably can't.
Speaker 4: My family never sat down together in the morning, so
Speaker 4: many of you. There were so many of us, and
Speaker 4: I was always in trouble for being the last one.
Speaker 4: And Mom's like, you're gonmost the train and then she'd
Speaker 4: be run And I remember one day she stopped at
Speaker 4: the station to drop us off and her boot was
Speaker 4: wide open because one of us hadn't closed it, and
Speaker 4: she drove off and we were all trying to say, Mum,
Speaker 4: your boots so but she was like, I hate you.
Speaker 4: I'm like, some bad things would have happened that day.
Speaker 4: That was my morning.
Speaker 3: We'd love to know if anyone, if any out louders
Speaker 3: have cracked the morning shift, depending on what stage of
Speaker 3: life they're at. I think when you've got little kids,
Speaker 3: you just have to let it go, right. I know
Speaker 3: it comes back around, like now I get to walk
Speaker 3: the dog.
Speaker 2: You know, it's good. Anyway. I was recently made aware
Speaker 2: of a corner of the Internet that I did not
Speaker 2: know exist It's an online community on Reddit called bald
Speaker 2: and their motto is lose your hair, not your head.
Speaker 5: Oh very smart.
Speaker 2: So on the subreddit, it's all about these men empowering
Speaker 2: other men to go bald if they're balding. I went
Speaker 2: on it to see what all the fuss is about.
Speaker 2: They have one point three million weekly visitors to their group,
Speaker 2: and the top posts are men posting before and afters,
Speaker 2: like we kind of see what celebrities, except it's men
Speaker 2: who are going visit bald as before photo and then
Speaker 2: the after photos them fully shaving their head.
Speaker 5: And I was very turned on.
Speaker 2: These men are beautiful. So you can ask any of
Speaker 2: my friends. I've always always always found bald men to
Speaker 2: be extremely attractive. Give me a celebrity example, Jason Stadium
Speaker 2: and Charlie XCX's husband George. Yeah, so hot.
Speaker 4: There is there is this confidence to it. It's like
Speaker 4: I don't need hair.
Speaker 5: And then if they have it like a thick neck
Speaker 5: with tattoos.
Speaker 4: Thick beard, Oh my god.
Speaker 2: It is like the best combination of so excited.
Speaker 5: It is like my dream, like if.
Speaker 2: Hinge had like the option of like to choose physical features,
Speaker 2: which I don't think it should but if it had
Speaker 2: might be bald tick bald that I.
Speaker 3: Bet there are so many men who would be so
Speaker 3: happy to hear that, because you know, we talk about
Speaker 3: beauty standards for women all the time, right, and the
Speaker 3: pressure and the blah blah blah. But men and hair
Speaker 3: loss is a massive deal. And just like the technology
Speaker 3: around all kinds of anti aging stuff is improving and
Speaker 3: improving and improving, and now I've got all these options,
Speaker 3: the world of how to hold onto your hair is
Speaker 3: getting crazy with different treatments and transplants, and you know,
Speaker 3: you can do a DNA test to find out what's
Speaker 3: right for you. And I don't think I've realized how
Speaker 3: difficult it is for a lot of guys until I
Speaker 3: started listening to that cohort speaking and I was like, well,
Speaker 3: of course it would be completely identity challenging, Like, of
Speaker 3: course it would.
Speaker 4: And the fact that a lot of the medications, it's
Speaker 4: not that you're necessarily going to your GP and getting
Speaker 4: prescribed something. You're getting something online and it might have
Speaker 4: crazy side effects. One of the side effects of one
Speaker 4: of the most kind of widely adopted hair loss medications
Speaker 4: is that it can affect sex drive, cause sexual dysfunction
Speaker 4: or affect sperm quality. Huge decision to make to weigh
Speaker 4: up those potential side effects. But I think the fact
Speaker 4: that men are taking medication in light of those being
Speaker 4: potential side effects shows how much they value it.
Speaker 3: Well, it must be hard for guys too, because everyone
Speaker 3: just shouts at them, shave your head. Man lo clt
Speaker 3: with shaved heads, as many men do do, but not
Speaker 3: all men.
Speaker 2: It's the same as women. I imagine if we just
Speaker 2: got that advice all the time.
Speaker 3: And I remember when I was at college, one of
Speaker 3: my really good friends who sound shaved her head and
Speaker 3: she looked she looked like Shinead O'Connor.
Speaker 2: She looked gorgeous. If I'd have shaved my head, I'd
Speaker 2: look like a potato, Like.
Speaker 4: I don't have the head for it.
Speaker 2: And everybody's head is not equal.
Speaker 3: And yet we say to guys all the time, just
Speaker 3: shave it off, you'll be fine, and they're like, but
Speaker 3: maybe I've got a horrible herd.
Speaker 4: I really liked scrolling through this Reddit thread because it
Speaker 4: was like positive masculinity. It's men being like, you can
Speaker 4: do this, It's okay. Everyone loses their hair like it's
Speaker 4: really cute, but it made me think, and this is
Speaker 4: a little depressing, what's the female equivalent of bold pride? Like,
Speaker 4: is there anything that we can g out?
Speaker 3: So this week I've seen a few women on and
Speaker 3: it feels a bit throwback to me because it's the
Speaker 3: kind of thing we used to do. But I've seen
Speaker 3: a few older women lately posting like makeup free selfies,
Speaker 3: like Rebecca Gibney did it, for example, in the wake
Speaker 3: of the kind of Rachel Ward criticism and saying show
Speaker 3: your natural aging face, and everyone's supposed to say, you go, girl,
Speaker 3: how amazing, which they do look amazing, But as you
Speaker 3: might predict, it also devolves into like, what are you
Speaker 3: judging me for having both?
Speaker 2: Like you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: Like it also kind of devolves into a sort of
Speaker 3: judgment y space. But it would be nice to think
Speaker 3: it wouldn't have to Prince Harry and William on that
Speaker 3: Reddit thread.
Speaker 4: Oh I reckon. Yeah, they'd have pseudonyms, but they'd be
Speaker 4: on there. They'd be taking digs at each other because we.
Speaker 2: Know that Harry did that. Harry Harry did that in
Speaker 2: his book.
Speaker 3: He had a dig at William's hair loss in his book,
Speaker 3: which now I think he might be regretting because he
Speaker 3: also is struggling with his hairline now and there's again,
Speaker 3: shave your head, Harry em would love it.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, Harry, please what made me sad about
Speaker 2: this bread? It was because I genuinely didn't know that
Speaker 2: so many men felt ashamed about going bald or even
Speaker 2: like going gray, I would say, is the same. And
Speaker 2: it just made me think that everyone has a type.
Speaker 2: Like all my friends know that bald men are specifically
Speaker 2: my type. But then I have friends who are into
Speaker 2: like really big wonky nose and friends who are into
Speaker 2: like really wonky teeth, And I'm like, if we're all
Speaker 2: trying to look the best version of ourselves, Like if
Speaker 2: every man was like I'm gonna get hair plugs, I'm
Speaker 2: gonna get hair, then like, there's my type.
Speaker 5: God, there's no.
Speaker 2: One for you anywhere. There's someone for everyone, guys, there's
Speaker 2: a lid for every pot exactly.
Speaker 3: That's what my grand needs to say after the break.
Speaker 3: Recommendations and em, it's going to tell us about the
Speaker 3: show that everybody.
Speaker 5: Is talking about.
Speaker 2: Vibes, ideas, atmosphere.
Speaker 6: Casual, soping, fun.
Speaker 5: This is my best recommendation.
Speaker 3: It's Friday and We want to obviously give you all
Speaker 3: the good things to do and watch and all that
Speaker 3: stuff this weekend, and Emily Vernon is going first, what
Speaker 3: are we supposed to be watching?
Speaker 2: We are all supposed to be watching a show on
Speaker 2: Netflix called How to Get to Heaven from Belfast. Everybody's
Speaker 2: told me about it.
Speaker 5: It's a very long name. For the longest time I was,
Speaker 5: I was.
Speaker 2: Calling it the long Journey Road from Heaven to Belfast
Speaker 2: and how to get there.
Speaker 5: It is so good.
Speaker 2: It's created by Lisa McGee, who created my favorite of
Speaker 2: all time, Dairy Girls, right, And it's about these three
Speaker 2: women who are childhood friends in their late thirties. One
Speaker 2: of their friends have passed away and they realized she's
Speaker 2: passed away under mysterious circumstances, so they take it upon
Speaker 2: themselves to figure out how she died. Dear Sirisha darre Rob,
Speaker 2: they have some terribly sad news. Second, may free understood.
Speaker 5: Dead and like Moors. Whole thing's just awful, just so young.
Speaker 1: I was talking about your rouge foot Are they pajamas?
Speaker 1: The treasures work like pajamas.
Speaker 2: It is one of those murder mysteries, but it is
Speaker 2: so so funny. Like crazy funny. In the first few episodes,
Speaker 2: I had to have subtitles on because if you watch
Speaker 2: Darry the Irish Northern Irish very accents, so it's Northern
Speaker 2: Irish accent is one of them, Shamie Dawn and best
Speaker 2: accents in the world. It is so attractive and these
Speaker 2: women are just so funny, and it feels like, you know,
Speaker 2: when you're watching such a good show that it feels
Speaker 2: like the actors couldn't be anyone else, but the characters
Speaker 2: they're playing like they feel like they're their.
Speaker 3: Own famous in it or are they all They're not
Speaker 3: the same people from Dairy Girls, Like it's different.
Speaker 2: There are some characters in Darry Girls, but their side
Speaker 2: characters look, I.
Speaker 5: Don't know that main character.
Speaker 2: They were not no, but they're famous in Ireland because
Speaker 2: my mom watched the show and she was like, you
Speaker 2: should know all of these people because they're famous, and
Speaker 2: I I was like, okay, but it's just really funny.
Speaker 2: It's also one of those shows that you can watch
Speaker 2: by yourself or with friends or with a partner, and
Speaker 2: everyone you're watching with it.
Speaker 5: You're not going to feel like do they like it?
Speaker 5: Do they not? Because they will love it.
Speaker 2: I've heard the soundtracks also really good. The soundtrack is
Speaker 2: really good. You can also find it on Spotify. So
Speaker 2: I've been listening on my warning walks and it's just
Speaker 2: one of those feel good shows that I feel like
Speaker 2: is perfect, like the perfect formula of a perfect show.
Speaker 4: Why do I love watching things set in Ireland? I'd
Speaker 4: watch anything.
Speaker 5: There's always that God element that's like there, but it's
Speaker 5: just fun. It's just really Northern Ireland.
Speaker 2: Not that this Belfast Belfast.
Speaker 5: I love it. Can't wait to go, I need to go.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, No, Belfast is absolutely a vibe.
Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, everyone watch it.
Speaker 2: It's on Netflix, please and then talk to me about
Speaker 2: it and tell me your theories.
Speaker 4: Plus Stevens also on Well, this is just pure dark,
Speaker 4: no humor. Ah, I like fictional dark things at the
Speaker 4: moment because the world is very dark. I don't need
Speaker 4: to look at that. Best book I've read in quite
Speaker 4: a long time The Death of Us by Abigail Dean. So,
Speaker 4: Abigail Dean is the author of Girl A, which I loved.
Speaker 2: That book's really really dark. Yeah, it's a very good book.
Speaker 4: That one is about seven siblings who grew up in
Speaker 4: a house of Horror's situation.
Speaker 2: Often I know one of those books that stays with
Speaker 2: you like it's.
Speaker 3: Grim as all it does. And is this a similar vibe?
Speaker 4: Yeah, And Abigail Dean was a lawyer for a decade,
Speaker 4: and I feel like that really comes through in her writing.
Speaker 4: You can tell, because even with the House of Horror's story,
Speaker 4: it came out in like just in some of the storyline.
Speaker 2: And there was a really good twist.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: And this book, The Death of Us Sunday Times bestseller. Obviously.
Speaker 4: It's about a couple, Isabelle and Edward, whose lives completely
Speaker 4: change after a terrifying home invasion and attack. And here's
Speaker 4: the blurb because it just it sums it up so well.
Speaker 4: It's the story everyone wants to hear that spring night
Speaker 4: in South London when Isabelle and Edward's lives were torn apart.
Speaker 4: That night, Isabelle learned that the worst things wait just
Speaker 4: outside the door. The night Edward learned that he was
Speaker 4: powerless to stop them, the night they never talk about.
Speaker 4: When their attacker is caught, it's finally time to tell
Speaker 4: the story of that night, not to the world or
Speaker 4: to the man who did it, but to each other.
Speaker 4: And it's told through multiple timelines, so you see the
Speaker 4: beginning of their relationship and their love story, which is beautiful.
Speaker 4: In the present day, they're old art, they're separated, and
Speaker 4: it's the court case, so you're finding out what's happening
Speaker 4: as this man is being prosecuted for what he did,
Speaker 4: but you're also slowly finding out why they're separated. And
Speaker 4: the thing that I just found so clever about this
Speaker 4: is that we know that so many long term relationships
Speaker 4: end after a trial, like you talk about how nobody could,
Speaker 4: like so few couples survive the death of a child
Speaker 4: or anything like this where it's like something so earth
Speaker 4: shattering happens. And the thing I loved about it was
Speaker 4: they are separated not for the reason you think, and
Speaker 4: it makes complete sense, and you really really get why
Speaker 4: these kind of defining, really scary moments do set you
Speaker 4: on two different paths. So it's brilliant. It's dark and scary,
Speaker 4: but it is page I've never read a page turner
Speaker 4: like that. You just have to keep going, and it's
Speaker 4: creepy and I'm.
Speaker 2: Not sure I can handle it at the moment, but
Speaker 2: I'll get there.
Speaker 3: It's not so great help that's real. I have something
Speaker 3: completely different. Oh, either of you seen Harry Styles this
Speaker 3: one night in Manchester on Netflix my friends, No, I
Speaker 3: have not.
Speaker 2: No, Emily won't be watching. You're not a Harry Styles guy. No,
Speaker 2: I'm like, I mean, I like his music. He could
Speaker 2: work on his dance moves.
Speaker 4: I was gonna say, I'm here to watch him dance.
Speaker 2: I am.
Speaker 4: He's got some new moves.
Speaker 3: So Harry has a new album out. It's called It's
Speaker 3: an embarrassing title. Even I have to say it's an
Speaker 3: embarrassing title. It's kiss all the Time Disco occasionally. I'm
Speaker 3: too old for that title. I'm definitely too old for
Speaker 3: that title. But the add's too long a banger, it's
Speaker 3: dance music.
Speaker 2: I love it. I'm here for it. But the way
Speaker 2: that he.
Speaker 3: Has released it into the world is it released on Friday.
Speaker 3: On Friday night, he did a concert in Manchester, which
Speaker 3: obviously is my hometown where tickets are only twenty pounds
Speaker 3: because that's my Harry massive arena show. And all he
Speaker 3: did was play the album, so it's not like the
Speaker 3: show that he's going to tour. He just played the
Speaker 3: album and then he threw a few crowd pleases. On
Speaker 3: the end of it abous he was and everything for
Speaker 3: the ladies.
Speaker 2: This is not the tour show.
Speaker 5: We don't ever play it like this again.
Speaker 2: Believed in Manchester.
Speaker 7: You have one simple child.
Speaker 2: And then it's to have as much.
Speaker 6: Fun as you possibly.
Speaker 3: And then it dropped on Netflix on Sunday, so they
Speaker 3: were not messing around. They were like concert Friday drops
Speaker 3: on Netflix on Sunday.
Speaker 2: I think Sunday English time. It was six am Monday our.
Speaker 5: Time that I was waiting refreshing.
Speaker 2: So it's just so interesting. I love watching how artists.
Speaker 3: Are trying to like beat the algorithm cynicism these days,
Speaker 3: you know, like, so this is just a new way
Speaker 3: to show you an album, I guess. But Harry is
Speaker 3: glorious as he always is. The songs are bangers, but
Speaker 3: it's also really perfect. My point is it's the perfect
Speaker 3: thing to put on your Telly on Saturday morning and
Speaker 3: then do all your jobs to it. Because the music
Speaker 3: is banging every now and again, you can look up
Speaker 3: and you'll just see Harry.
Speaker 2: Like going, it's a big movie, is this.
Speaker 3: He's gospel choir, he's got classical musicians, he's got lots
Speaker 3: of like Knob twiddling DJs and stuff. His band are
Speaker 3: often very female heavy, which they always are. He has
Speaker 3: one of the best female drummers in the world, always
Speaker 3: plays with him.
Speaker 5: Is he still wearing really nice outfits?
Speaker 2: Well?
Speaker 3: I was distracted by the fact that, so he plays
Speaker 3: for ninety minutes, the man dances and runs all over
Speaker 3: the place. He wears long pants, a buttoned up long
Speaker 3: sleeve shirt with the sweatshirt over the top. And the
Speaker 3: man does not have one drop of sweat on his head.
Speaker 3: But I was very distracted by that. I am drowning
Speaker 3: in sweat walking across the park.
Speaker 4: I was going to say, is that you.
Speaker 2: So fit?
Speaker 3: Don't you just want to take your shirt off? Like
Speaker 3: I don't mean for perfect I mean like with a.
Speaker 2: T shirt or something. I'm like, there's a.
Speaker 3: Lot of clothes.
Speaker 2: I know it's Manchester and it's cold, but like they're
Speaker 2: inside anyway.
Speaker 3: But that aside, it's just joy, Like it's just joy.
Speaker 3: You can see how much he loves this music. I
Speaker 3: was a little bit worried about him at the end,
Speaker 3: because he goes off and he's on his own, and
Speaker 3: I'm like, why don't you wait for the band and
Speaker 3: all hug each other?
Speaker 5: And like I am.
Speaker 3: I was like, I'm worried about you anyway. Apart from that,
Speaker 3: apparently what's the name he's dating? So we crab it.
Speaker 2: Yes, she was there, but she isn't on the film
Speaker 2: because he doesn't do that.
Speaker 5: I would have liked that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, she was definitely there. They were seeing in Manchester
Speaker 3: that day, but she wasn't there anyway. It's great if
Speaker 3: you just want some good shoes to clean your frickin'
Speaker 3: house too, or maybe dance around to your move app
Speaker 3: or whatever.
Speaker 2: Harry's live show is it okay?
Speaker 5: I might give it a go now.
Speaker 2: The man is amazing.
Speaker 5: He's a good scene.
Speaker 2: Anyway. It's called One Night in Manchester and it's on Netflix. No,
Speaker 2: that is all we have time for this week.
Speaker 3: Friends, A massive thank you to all of you for
Speaker 3: being here with us all week. Who wants to thank
Speaker 3: our incredible team?
Speaker 2: I can a big thank you to our beautiful, beautiful team.
Speaker 2: Our group executive producer Rude Divine, our executive producer Sashatanic,
Speaker 2: our senior audio producer Is Porges, our video producer Josh Green,
Speaker 2: and our junior content producer.
Speaker 5: Is Tessa Kodovich.
Speaker 4: Mum mayor acknowledges the traditional owners of the land on
Speaker 4: which we have recorded this podcast.
Speaker 2: Hey out louders.
Speaker 3: Miya does special subscriber episodes every Tuesday and every Thursday.
Speaker 3: Hopefully you're listening because they are golden and we are
Speaker 3: about to play you part of the conversation that she
Speaker 3: and Amelia Lester had yesterday about female friendship. A link
Speaker 3: to subscribe is in the show notes.
Speaker 6: Well, the weird thing about our friendship is that we
Speaker 6: have had the energy, but we've never had proximity, and
Speaker 6: we've never had timing.
Speaker 5: We've always been in.
Speaker 6: Vastly different life stages. You're much younger than me, much
Speaker 6: much decades younger, right decade, but also life stage wise, yes,
Speaker 6: like by the time I was your age, finished having kids.
Speaker 6: You've got little kids.
Speaker 1: You're a grandmother.
Speaker 6: I'm a grandmother, so our kids are similar ages. But
Speaker 6: I'm a grandmother and you weren't even married when I
Speaker 6: met you. And then when we're in proximity. You know,
Speaker 6: we both worked in the media and stuff, but then
Speaker 6: you took a different track with your career and moved
Speaker 6: back overseas, so we've never had those things. What we've
Speaker 6: always had is energy. Yes, you know for the ten
Speaker 6: years of our friendship. Yes, we've just pinged back and
Speaker 6: forth multiple times every day.
Speaker 1: But what I wanted to ask about is on that
Speaker 1: energy point, what does mel say about the extent to
Speaker 1: which you should be sort of letting your friends versus
Speaker 1: intervening with them, Because I feel like since I moved
Speaker 1: back and we've been in closer contact physically, I feel
Speaker 1: like we've had a few blow ups that we didn't
Speaker 1: have before, And I wonder if that's because we are
Speaker 1: expecting or demanding more from each other now that we're.
Speaker 6: No, I think it's because we're working together now. Oh,
Speaker 6: I think it's that. I honestly don't think it's that. Yeah,
Speaker 6: I don't think it's the proximity will never be in
Speaker 6: the same life stage, although no, we probably won't.
Speaker 1: But then this morning when we were talking about it,
Speaker 1: Holly said, Oh, I let everyone do everything, and if
Speaker 1: a friend is doing something annoying, I just let it go.
Speaker 1: And I'm curious what you think about that, because I
Speaker 1: heard that and I thought I'm the opposite of that.
Speaker 1: I never let anything go. In fact, you said to
Speaker 1: me you never let anything go.
Speaker 6: You never let anything go, but not necessarily in a
Speaker 6: bad way. You're not afraid of confrontation, and most people are,
Speaker 6: and I've never minded that about you.