Speaker 1: We acknowledged the traditional custodians of the land we're recording
Speaker 1: on today.
Speaker 2: I have been singing to rue Party, Party, Party, Party, Party, Party,
Speaker 2: thinking I'm an absolute lunatic, but you've just made me
Speaker 2: feel like an absolute genius.
Speaker 3: Hello, and welcome to eat, sleep, shit Repeat. This is
Speaker 3: the Unhinged Podcast, all about the madness that is motherhood
Speaker 3: and everything in between. I'm Kelly mccaren and I'm Key
Speaker 3: re cels And in case you missed it, last week,
Speaker 3: we kicked off season four with Kell sharing her experience
Speaker 3: with Lynn as a newborn. We talked about the difference
Speaker 3: between a crying baby and one that never stops, and
Speaker 3: knowing when to advocate for your baby.
Speaker 1: This week, we are finally talking about party training. Thank goodness,
Speaker 1: because I have been begging yay Kelly McCarran to do this. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've been begging you wear this for months and you'd
Speaker 1: rather bury your head in the sand than spend three
Speaker 1: days at home picking up poos and weez Is that right?
Speaker 1: It's absolutely right? I just I don't care. We'll be
Speaker 1: chatting through all of the trends in the shitter, responses
Speaker 1: on their potty training experiences and a big thank you
Speaker 1: to those who responded because it was so helpful. I'm
Speaker 1: not even kidding. I have gone and purchased a few
Speaker 1: of the things that they recommended.
Speaker 3: Key froths on this sort of stuff too, like just
Speaker 3: that fucking love getting in there.
Speaker 1: Helpful, mumshit, helpful, Mumshit's my jam girlfriend. And then we
Speaker 1: chat to our shitter, Sarah, who has over ten years
Speaker 1: experience in early childhood working with many many families to
Speaker 1: help support the process of toilet training. She's going to
Speaker 1: be showing her advice, her tips, her tricks to help
Speaker 1: us get through this shit.
Speaker 3: Literally, oh god botom shee wow dad joke over here,
Speaker 3: All right, over to you.
Speaker 1: Kel four Peak and pittance you this week.
Speaker 3: It is, indeed, and they're sort of tied in together.
Speaker 3: Peak was a really bloody good weekend. On Friday night,
Speaker 3: my sister and I took Mum to see and Juliette,
Speaker 3: I really want to see this. It was my second
Speaker 3: time Key and you know that I'm not a musical person,
Speaker 3: That's how much.
Speaker 1: I loved it. Shocking, but the music's so good, right
Speaker 1: because it's like our era of music.
Speaker 3: It's not even the music like to be honest. I
Speaker 3: do still get sick of the singing. I just can't
Speaker 3: sit still and listen to people fucking sing for that long.
Speaker 1: But it's so good. I love it. All the characters
Speaker 1: are so good. Okay, I love Doug. Are they paying
Speaker 1: you for this plug?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 3: Everyone should go and see Ajuliet while it's still in
Speaker 3: Sydney because it'll be moving somewhere next I don't know
Speaker 3: if it's going to Melbourne or shows. Go to Brisbane,
Speaker 3: agam on, go on.
Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, we've got stuff. Okay, we're actually quite
Speaker 1: cool anyway.
Speaker 3: So Friday night was and Juliet, and then because Mum
Speaker 3: was in Sydney, she was looking after lenn on Saturdays.
Speaker 1: It's like so and like as in help.
Speaker 3: Literally we had our third night away from Lenny since
Speaker 3: he was born.
Speaker 1: That is grim. It's grim.
Speaker 3: And one of those times it was for Luke's dad funerals.
Speaker 3: It doesn't really count. So second time, whoo. Yeah, so
Speaker 3: we could go to our beautiful friend's wedding.
Speaker 1: You know who does love a wedding? Luke Lou that man.
Speaker 1: He loves an event. Yeah, he loves an event.
Speaker 3: He's the first one on the dance floor at a
Speaker 3: wedding absolutely froths it. So that was really fun, and
Speaker 3: it was just nice. It was just a really great weekend.
Speaker 3: And Lenny obviously had so much fun staying with his nan,
Speaker 3: having a slumber party at cousin's house, so cute. So
Speaker 3: my pit is so grim. I've lost my piss fitness.
Speaker 1: Oh, Kelly, for fuck's sake, I thought it was something serious.
Speaker 3: Can you can you something serious?
Speaker 1: No? I thought it was something like call the ambilarious
Speaker 1: wheel Wheel.
Speaker 3: We've I worked so hard to get as fit as
Speaker 3: I was for my alcoholic consumption, consumption, enjoyment, and it
Speaker 3: is gone.
Speaker 1: And it's not sad. It's lovely to be a cheap day.
Speaker 1: You don't have to drink not you don't have to
Speaker 1: drink as much to get the same buzz I like drinking.
Speaker 1: Just drink soda water and pretend it's a buddy. It's boring.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I'm actually so upset about this. Oh God,
Speaker 1: I'm still recovering from the fact that it's not something
Speaker 1: more serious.
Speaker 3: You're serious. I didn't even lose it through pregnancy. My
Speaker 3: first night out post.
Speaker 1: We just clarify you weren't drinking. I had a glass
Speaker 1: here all there. Yeah, but you won't like absolutely not clarify.
Speaker 3: But that's what I mean. Like I didn't even lose it.
Speaker 3: Like my first night out, I was still the last
Speaker 3: person standing. Yeah, one of the last people standing. Wasn't
Speaker 3: that bad? The next day, like I had my fitness
Speaker 3: go girl, it is gone?
Speaker 4: Where did it go?
Speaker 3: Well?
Speaker 1: I cut back.
Speaker 3: My doctor told me in order for one of my
Speaker 3: medications to work, I had to cut back because alcohore
Speaker 3: really affects him. Yeah, okay, so about seven months ago
Speaker 3: I cut back, and I cut back a lot, Like
Speaker 3: my face got so less puffy and people are like, oh,
Speaker 3: you've lost weight. I'm like, no, I really didn't know.
Speaker 3: Just yeah, don't have a puffy face. And if I
Speaker 3: didn't realize how bad it was anyway, So I cut
Speaker 3: back about seven months ago. I still drink, but nothing
Speaker 3: like what I was before. I never had a problem,
Speaker 3: but I was drinking a lot. Yeah always, you know,
Speaker 3: really enjoyed a.
Speaker 1: Tipple or two. Ten.
Speaker 3: I now get drunk really easily, and I get horrible hangovers. Yeah,
Speaker 3: half a bottle of wine and I feel cranky all
Speaker 3: day the next day and I feel tired. So it's awful. Key, Yeah,
Speaker 3: this is what I'm saying. It's a horrible pit. Just
Speaker 3: spent thirty five years or have long. I've been drinking
Speaker 3: since out of the woom, working on my fitness. Yeah,
Speaker 3: to live up to my idol Paris Hilton the party girl.
Speaker 1: Now gone, gone gone, God.
Speaker 3: Next minute, I'm going to be a bloody wellness influenza.
Speaker 3: Last week I talked about my crystals, be making green
Speaker 3: smoothies and going for jogs soon.
Speaker 1: Not the job, not the jogs.
Speaker 3: You know how I feel about people who run where
Speaker 3: itose you used to run every day?
Speaker 1: Anyway? That was my peek and pitch. Well, thanks, but
Speaker 1: can you please just don't scare me next time?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 1: Today is a good day, finally getting my way on
Speaker 1: this bloody podcast training Kelly, I just want to know,
Speaker 1: first and foremost, why were you so against this topic?
Speaker 1: What is actually the issue here? Because a lot of
Speaker 1: people requested this.
Speaker 3: I know, even though this is a parenting and lifestyle podcast,
Speaker 3: I don't care about a lot of parenting stuff.
Speaker 1: You don't care about not having to wipe his ass? No, okay,
Speaker 1: well I really really don't. I reckon you're the first
Speaker 1: parent ever.
Speaker 3: I just don't care, and it just seems like a
Speaker 3: lot of work, and I know that makes me sound
Speaker 3: incredibly lazy. I also just like, oh, we got overcomplic it,
Speaker 3: like when he wants to shit on the toilet, he will. However,
Speaker 3: I'm always very pleased for people when they're like, oh
Speaker 3: my god, like when you're like, oh, Ruth basically potty trained.
Speaker 1: I'd never said that I go before too. Okay, look
Speaker 1: the records set. I never frecking said that. Well she
Speaker 1: was though, so a little bit. Okay, well that's fair,
Speaker 1: but can you please feign interest for the next forty
Speaker 1: five minutes?
Speaker 3: I'm interested, excellent, No, I'm very excited to talk to
Speaker 3: Sarah because she's an expert.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's fab. So I thought it might be a
Speaker 1: good spot to kick off the episode with where we're
Speaker 1: currently at with our kids, and someone's si, I guess
Speaker 1: you have you attempted any form of potty training at all?
Speaker 3: Well, he started showing interest at Christmas time?
Speaker 1: Okay, what were the signs?
Speaker 3: So he was often without an happy because we're in
Speaker 3: the pool summer summer. Yeah, and he was always very
Speaker 3: conscious of needing to wee, So he'd look at me
Speaker 3: and be like wee wee yeah, and holding his duty,
Speaker 3: and I'd be like, hey, go over to the grass.
Speaker 1: He'd go over to the lovely do a wee yeah.
Speaker 3: And then he also get very embarrassed and upset if
Speaker 3: he did it on the floor, But I was like, bro,
Speaker 3: who cares, It's just a wee.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So my sister in law bought him as part of
Speaker 3: his birthday present one of those potty training books with
Speaker 3: the charts.
Speaker 1: And everything else.
Speaker 3: Yeah, never opened it, of course, And I went to
Speaker 3: Kmart got the potty. My sister already had the little seat, yeah,
Speaker 3: resting on the covered in dust, yeah, resting on the
Speaker 3: wall of the toilet, caring. Oh yeah, and I haven't
Speaker 3: done anything. He sits on it like I'll offer it up. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I say, would you like to use the potty? And
Speaker 3: he likes to sit on it without pants yep, and
Speaker 3: just chat.
Speaker 1: Has he done anything in it?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 1: All right, okay, so that's where we're at. But he
Speaker 1: likes to sit on it.
Speaker 3: But yeah, in terms of encouraging it, he's very aware,
Speaker 3: Like he knows when he's doing a pooh, yeah, you know,
Speaker 3: he laughs and giggles if he's doing a wei in
Speaker 3: the bath, so I know that he's ready.
Speaker 1: Oh, it's me being lazy. You both have to be ready.
Speaker 1: A lot of the shit have said that makes sure
Speaker 1: you're both ready.
Speaker 3: I do want to know what you did, because you
Speaker 3: did it very quickly and pretty seamlessly with rue, whereas
Speaker 3: I know so many people it's like years.
Speaker 1: Well, the thing is I didn't want to rush it. It
Speaker 1: wasn't really on my radar of things. I haven't read
Speaker 1: one thing about how to do.
Speaker 3: It, and she wasn't even two. Can we just clarify again?
Speaker 4: So around the super mom, super rude Sony will be
Speaker 4: three and I still wouldn't have in for us the putty.
Speaker 3: Oh one other thing no one in his class is. Oh,
Speaker 3: and it's not even as finine. It's fine, there's no
Speaker 3: right or wrong. Every kid is different.
Speaker 1: You probably don't want to be wearing nappies in high school?
Speaker 1: Well yeah, I mean that's a different thing, isn't it.
Speaker 1: So it was around maybe the thirteen month mark, around
Speaker 1: even when she was one ish, like twelve thirteen month mark.
Speaker 1: She was super interested whenever we were on the toilet, like,
Speaker 1: what are you doing looking in that poo pooh pooh,
Speaker 1: poo pool. Do she find it really funny? So funny
Speaker 1: and she wants to see it anyway, I don't want
Speaker 1: to get too graphic. I was like, I'm just going
Speaker 1: to buy her a potty. I'm not going to force
Speaker 1: her to do anything, but I'm just going to have
Speaker 1: it next to our toilets. So when we're sitting on
Speaker 1: it and she's showing interest, I'm just like, hey, why
Speaker 1: don't you sit on your potty and just like see
Speaker 1: if anything happens. Question.
Speaker 3: Yeah, if you're both home, do you leave the door open?
Speaker 4: What?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 1: Okay, thank god some people do well? No, no, no, we're
Speaker 1: shutting it.
Speaker 3: I don't shut it for a wi I don't even
Speaker 3: shut it for a week when you're here.
Speaker 1: But I sit to do wiez obviously, but like, how
Speaker 1: long does it take?
Speaker 3: It takes a long time for a kid to get
Speaker 3: out of then happy all over the ladies, I'd see lazy.
Speaker 3: I'd be like, no, no, no, no, no, this is the thing.
Speaker 1: Right, So this is over summer and she's naked all
Speaker 1: the time at home, right, So she would just sit
Speaker 1: on it, and then one day she just started winging
Speaker 1: in it. Oh my god, little baby genius, rude. And
Speaker 1: then one day she did a pooh and I was like,
Speaker 1: without being bribed, no bribery, I haven't never heard of
Speaker 1: a child.
Speaker 3: I think some kids just do it, just do it right.
Speaker 3: And then kids that are really potty trained, like they
Speaker 3: still often for a very long time wait to pooh
Speaker 3: when they have a nappy on.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well this is the thing, right, is that, like
Speaker 1: I have changed. I can count on one hand huey
Speaker 1: nappies in the last six months. Like the first one
Speaker 1: was the other day when we were out and I
Speaker 1: was on the phone and the girls were watching her
Speaker 1: and she was telling them poo poo, poo pooh. But
Speaker 1: they were like, well, I don't know what to do
Speaker 1: because they're not up to that yet, one of them is.
Speaker 1: But she was also like, I don't know what to do,
Speaker 1: So she poohed in r nappy and that was the
Speaker 1: first one I've done all year.
Speaker 3: People that get smug about that, though you're not a smug,
Speaker 3: but they'll say, oh, when you not want to change
Speaker 3: a dirty nappy, what is the difference between wiping a
Speaker 3: dirty ass?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it's the same, Like it's just as gross. Well,
Speaker 1: it's a bit less a teeny bit less, but it's
Speaker 1: the same thing, right, So isn't.
Speaker 3: It hard with a little girl? Like do you have
Speaker 3: to get it a proper leg up?
Speaker 1: Like I just make I just make her put her
Speaker 1: forearms on the toilet and like pop out her buck,
Speaker 1: but she hates it. It's actually quite annoying. But the
Speaker 1: thing we struggled with the most with was wheeze, which
Speaker 1: I haven't heard of from anyone. Like, well, she started
Speaker 1: to regularly in the potty and I'm like, okay, cool
Speaker 1: when she was doing wheeze and stuff. So then I
Speaker 1: was like, all right, cool, let's try undies. And it
Speaker 1: was right at the time where she thought it's funny
Speaker 1: to piss everywhere. So that lasted for a hot minute
Speaker 1: and I went, it's too soon, and I just took
Speaker 1: a step back. I was like, the undies are there
Speaker 1: when we want to use them, YadA YadA, yadda. And
Speaker 1: then that's kind of been it. But I've noticed that
Speaker 1: lately she's been running to the toilet when she needs
Speaker 1: to do a wei. So this week I've taken nappy
Speaker 1: off again. It's cold, but I just put her in
Speaker 1: a jumper and she has socks on and she's find
Speaker 1: our house is like pretty warm, and she's been taking herself,
Speaker 1: so I think we may be ready to start the
Speaker 1: toilet or the potties the potty. Okay, yeah, the toilet's
Speaker 1: too big for her, like she'd fall in. But yeah,
Speaker 1: quite a funny sight her long limbs.
Speaker 3: Ah.
Speaker 1: But yeah, that's kind of been an experience so far.
Speaker 1: I think just not having any expectation. I wasn't super
Speaker 1: keen to do it. I wasn't trying to do it.
Speaker 1: I literally just put it there and I hoped for
Speaker 1: the best. And I think that that has suited her personality.
Speaker 1: She's very like I call her a follower. Oh, she
Speaker 1: likes to follow what people are doing. She likes to
Speaker 1: follow Goldie around whenever she's not super defiant or no.
Speaker 1: So she's like into it. But look, there are moments
Speaker 1: when she's kind of been better or worse. But I
Speaker 1: think that now she's kind of about the age where
Speaker 1: we can really do it. But honestly, reading all of
Speaker 1: the Shitter's responses has been so helpful, I thought I
Speaker 1: might pull out kind of just the top line themes
Speaker 1: to the responses, so the average age that I should
Speaker 1: have started potty training was two and a half. Okay, right,
Speaker 1: so I'm fine, You're fine. The youngest was twelve months,
Speaker 1: which I was like, wow, twelve month twelve months? Didn't
Speaker 1: you say that? There was one lady the baby was
Speaker 1: like a newborn. There was a shitter that responded who
Speaker 1: had her friends whose mum potty trained them.
Speaker 3: At three weeks, which I was like, I was, I
Speaker 3: also just don't believe it. I want to hear that story,
Speaker 3: but I just do not believe it.
Speaker 1: I mean, it seems far fetched, but we believe U
Speaker 1: shit is. But I made think that lady's lying. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: not the shit align the mom and mum exactly. That
Speaker 1: was like a Karn at her PTA meeting, just being like, oh,
Speaker 1: they leave it so long these days. I potty trained
Speaker 1: mine at three weeks old. It's like they can't even
Speaker 1: look their head.
Speaker 3: They're still shitting their pants. Karen.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the oldest was three and a half. That's still
Speaker 1: a toddler. Still a toddler for sure. But the post
Speaker 1: get bigger, the bigger they get reasons for starting showing
Speaker 1: interest with the parents or siblings, siblings. Some people seem
Speaker 1: to be quite good just awareness of like hating wearing
Speaker 1: a wet or soiled nappy, or vocalizing when they would
Speaker 1: be going to the loose. So they were just like
Speaker 1: hyper aware of it. Talking about potty training maybe being
Speaker 1: at daycare and seeing other people do it a necessity.
Speaker 1: A lot of people said it was due to necessity
Speaker 1: of the child moving to the preschool room and they
Speaker 1: have to and a lot of daycares they have to
Speaker 1: be potty trained by then, aren't necessity when another baby's
Speaker 1: on the way, not wanting to change two lots of diapers,
Speaker 1: totally get that warmer weather, wanting to do it before
Speaker 1: the next win, which is really true because a lot
Speaker 1: of potty training, they say to Strip and Bear. A
Speaker 1: couple of them said that their kids probably weren't ready,
Speaker 1: but also thought that they may have never been so
Speaker 1: really far from being ready, being dry overnight and in
Speaker 1: between nappy changes. And then the last one was my favorite.
Speaker 1: I was ready to stop changing shitty nappies, fair so fair.
Speaker 1: The number one resources that she has used was the
Speaker 1: Oh crap book that seemed to be really popular. I
Speaker 1: wonder if that's the one that I got from my
Speaker 1: sister in law that I haven't opened. Ye could have
Speaker 1: been that seconds was big little feelings course, like there's
Speaker 1: a potty training course. A lot of people were like none.
Speaker 1: I just trusted my gut and I trusted what my
Speaker 1: kid was doing. It's not rocket science. No, educators at
Speaker 1: childcare and other mums are really good. Good old Google.
Speaker 1: And then a lot of those books and courses that
Speaker 1: I mentioned, they used like reward charts to help set
Speaker 1: up like a good behavior, so that was the other
Speaker 1: kind of thing they did. The general consensus was poohs
Speaker 1: are a lot harder than wheeze, which wasn't helpful for me.
Speaker 1: Every kid is different, and the people who said they
Speaker 1: started too early said that their kid has continued to struggle.
Speaker 3: So I thought that was really really interesting.
Speaker 1: There were so many good tips. I didn't want to
Speaker 1: double up because we aren't going to be talking to
Speaker 1: Sarah later, so we're gonna pop them on socials so
Speaker 1: you can read through and by all of the recommendations
Speaker 1: that the shitters shared. Okay, so I've shared the shitter's responses.
Speaker 1: Cal talk to me about your friends, because I know
Speaker 1: you've got friends with older kids who've been through it.
Speaker 3: What I know, and I guess one of the reasons
Speaker 3: why I've never worried too much. Like I'm making jokes
Speaker 3: about being lazy, but he has the potty there to
Speaker 3: sit on. He's very interested when Evelyn, I'm like, do
Speaker 3: you want to use your potty? And he's like no, No.
Speaker 3: It's like I'm talking same thing, like they're gonna walk.
Speaker 3: But they're all just so different. Like my girlfriend's child
Speaker 3: were so advanced in so many different ways. Yes, speaking
Speaker 3: the things that she would remember, but still has a chart,
Speaker 3: and it's so cute to'll be like I tried, and
Speaker 3: then there'll be like one stuff.
Speaker 1: That's all that's really sweet.
Speaker 3: And then my girlfriend nat her child was three and
Speaker 3: completely potty trained, even night wow, no night nappies. He
Speaker 3: would go to the bathroom before I know. I'm like,
Speaker 3: how that seems so far away. I have another girlfriend, though,
Speaker 3: who's eight year old, stills in a night nappy. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and she's kind of like, eh, I don't want to
Speaker 3: have to get up and change the sheets all the time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I got so sick of it.
Speaker 3: At one point, he will be embarrassed and he will
Speaker 3: get his lazy ass out of bed and go to
Speaker 3: the toilet. Yeah, But she did have this thing. She
Speaker 3: used to say to me. Oh, when he has his
Speaker 3: first sleepover, that's when I reckon he will give up
Speaker 3: the night nappy because he'll be embarrassed. But apparently his
Speaker 3: friend came over and was like, they both had their
Speaker 3: night nappies. Stop it. But you know he will stop
Speaker 3: it when I guess he's Yeah. Yeah, so you're not
Speaker 3: a teenager or an adult wearing a nappy at all, Well,
Speaker 3: not until you get so old you might need a nappy. Yeah,
Speaker 3: there's no textbook, there's no rule. Everyone sort of just
Speaker 3: does what's best for their kids. Yeah, and at the
Speaker 3: end of the day, the kid gets there the end
Speaker 3: they do.
Speaker 1: Some people can feel the pressure, but I do think
Speaker 1: like reading those responses, doing it too early, you just
Speaker 1: don't want to push them when it's something like that
Speaker 1: because it's such a personal and private thing and you
Speaker 1: don't want to maybe or weird feelings around.
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, Like all it's dirty, especially about your reaction
Speaker 3: to it. And Lenny gets embarrassed if you waze on
Speaker 3: the phone, it's fine, it's just wait. Yeah, I don't
Speaker 3: know if i'deel the same about poop.
Speaker 1: Well, we are giving advice that we really shouldn't be giving, so,
Speaker 1: like we said, are not so practically, Yeah, we need
Speaker 1: to talk to someone who knows what they're talking about.
Speaker 1: And that person is our shit is Sarah, who is
Speaker 1: an educator of over ten years. Let's welcome her on
Speaker 1: to the show. Sarah, thank you so much for joining us.
Speaker 1: We are desperate to chat with you. Really, we wanted
Speaker 1: to kick it off by just asking you the question
Speaker 1: that I think all parents are asking, how do we
Speaker 1: know when our kid is ready to start potty training?
Speaker 5: I think the big thing is you're looking developmentally at
Speaker 5: where a child's at. One child when they're ready versus
Speaker 5: another child when they're ready. It is totally different. Realistically,
Speaker 5: they're learning a new skill, you know, they're learning something new,
Speaker 5: and I think it's even harder because they also have
Speaker 5: to listen to their body and that's, you know, even
Speaker 5: as adults, really hard to do. You'd say roughly between
Speaker 5: eighteen months and three years, and that's such a huge
Speaker 5: amount of time where they could be ready. So I
Speaker 5: think you know, you also want to look at what
Speaker 5: task they can do. Are they someone that you can say, hey,
Speaker 5: go and get that ball for me, or can you
Speaker 5: go and find your drink bottle. If that's something that
Speaker 5: they can do easily, that's also something that would say
Speaker 5: to me that they're ready. Because if you're asking them, hey,
Speaker 5: let's go and sit on the toilet and they don't
Speaker 5: know how to do that, then that's you know, tricky.
Speaker 5: I suppose you know, you would look at some base
Speaker 5: cues would be can they tell you when they've you know,
Speaker 5: got a wet nappy? Are they showing you? Are they
Speaker 5: telling you? I mean, toddlers do this a lot. Are
Speaker 5: they besting in on you on the toilet? You know
Speaker 5: they're interested in what you're doing, or in a childcare setting,
Speaker 5: often they might show interest in their friends and their
Speaker 5: peers as well on the toilet, or you know, maybe
Speaker 5: they're wanting to take their nappies off. I suppose the
Speaker 5: showing that they're ready to explore that part it's really
Speaker 5: child dependent.
Speaker 3: I suppose you've actually just blown my mind a little
Speaker 3: bit with the simplicity of seeing like the signs in
Speaker 3: terms of how responsive they are to your questions or instructions,
Speaker 3: because just thinking about lots of little kids that I
Speaker 3: know they do reach that stage at such different times.
Speaker 3: When can you go get mummy this, whereas you know,
Speaker 3: a kid the exact same age might not even acknowledge you,
Speaker 3: whereas the same age child might be like, goes and
Speaker 3: get something for you as soon as you ask. That's
Speaker 3: such a good way to sort of think about if
Speaker 3: they're ready.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because a lot of people are searching for the cues,
Speaker 1: which are many you listed, But they could have all
Speaker 1: the cues in the world, but if they still can't
Speaker 1: actually follow that direction, it's not going to be successful.
Speaker 1: You kind of need that as your I guess foundation
Speaker 1: to then follow the cues.
Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely, so whether or not they're sort of showing
Speaker 3: those signs or you know, signaling that they're ready. What
Speaker 3: age would you say a kid absolutely should be potty
Speaker 3: trained by?
Speaker 5: Look, I would say before school. Like if they're three
Speaker 5: and a half or they're four and they're not toilet training,
Speaker 5: you'd really sort of, you know, start to look into
Speaker 5: doing that with a little bit more of a time frame. Again,
Speaker 5: you're looking at developmentally, maybe there's something else there that's
Speaker 5: preventing them from doing that, and ots and occupational therapists
Speaker 5: are great for things like that if they need that
Speaker 5: additional support with that. But school ideally would be when
Speaker 5: you want to get them toilet trained.
Speaker 3: I feel like as well, it's pretty normal though everyone
Speaker 3: went to school with someone that we their pants or
Speaker 3: shot themselves, right totally.
Speaker 1: I mean, listen to the best of us. That can
Speaker 1: happen as adults.
Speaker 5: Really, My sister's a prep teacher and she has had
Speaker 5: a couple of children that she needs to toilet train.
Speaker 5: Or we're pretty much almost there, and then you know,
Speaker 5: they got to school and they regressed a little bit
Speaker 5: as well, because it's a new environment and that's normal
Speaker 5: and that's natural for that to happen as well.
Speaker 1: On that note, we did a little poll with the
Speaker 1: shitters and asked them about their potty training experience, and
Speaker 1: something that was quite interesting that came up was a
Speaker 1: lot of the parents who responded identified that they perhaps
Speaker 1: started too soon, said that their kid often continued to
Speaker 1: struggle with toilet training. Has that been similar in your experience?
Speaker 5: Absolutely? I think. You know, you also want to look
Speaker 5: at environmental factors. You know, maybe you've moved house, maybe
Speaker 5: you've changed childcares, maybe there's a new sibling, maybe mum's
Speaker 5: gone away for work. Little things like that can really
Speaker 5: set them back, you know, or maybe even something as
Speaker 5: simple as you've now changed around their room at home,
Speaker 5: like little tiny things can really have a setback for
Speaker 5: toilet training, and I think, you know, it's not you
Speaker 5: start toilet training and then that's it. Sometimes it takes
Speaker 5: two or three goes. And it also differs between siblings
Speaker 5: and for some people genders as well. So sometimes we
Speaker 5: have families that go, oh, yes, they toilet trained in
Speaker 5: one weekend and that was great, and then unfortunately for them,
Speaker 5: they get lured into a false sense of security for
Speaker 5: the sibling and often, you know, it takes them a
Speaker 5: month or a couple of months to really nail that
Speaker 5: toilet training and listening to their bodies and when they
Speaker 5: need to go. So it's totally normal that that happens,
Speaker 5: you know. Or maybe they start toilet training before they
Speaker 5: start daycare and all of a sudden it's a new
Speaker 5: environment and they're regressing a little bit, or even medically,
Speaker 5: you know, things come up like a uti, they don't
Speaker 5: want to go to the toilet anymore because they're already
Speaker 5: having these issues. So it's totally normal that some of
Speaker 5: them are going to regress, and some children need to
Speaker 5: take three or four times to do it.
Speaker 3: I'm even thinking about kids that are obsessed with their dummies,
Speaker 3: my child included. But how much sickness like regresses that
Speaker 3: weaning process. So whenever Len has been sick, he just
Speaker 3: becomes so much more reliant on it again and wants
Speaker 3: it all the time, whereas when he's really well doesn't
Speaker 3: ask for it during the day anymore. So it's like,
Speaker 3: I guess those two steps forwards, one step back everything,
Speaker 3: I guess when you're parenting totally.
Speaker 1: So what the f do we do? I'm so glad
Speaker 1: that you said that it can take longer than three days,
Speaker 1: because a lot of people were saying, Yeah, these courses
Speaker 1: and these books are telling me to do it in
Speaker 1: three days, but realistically there are still going to be accidents,
Speaker 1: et cetera. After so we've got the cues from the kid,
Speaker 1: they know how to take direction.
Speaker 5: What do we do now, I think, you know, there's
Speaker 5: no one size fits all Again, we look individually at
Speaker 5: what works for the child. I suppose some children do potties,
Speaker 5: some children do a toilet and a seat over the toilet.
Speaker 5: Some families do potty parties where they do do that
Speaker 5: you know, three day crash course of potty training and
Speaker 5: it's rudy neudy around the house, and you just kind
Speaker 5: of follow them around with a potty and see if
Speaker 5: that works.
Speaker 3: And hope for the best.
Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly, and you know, you kind of put poppy
Speaker 5: pads around the house and hope for the best, you know,
Speaker 5: or a lot of families do over summertime because the
Speaker 5: weather is a little bit warmer and it's easier clothing
Speaker 5: wise as well. You know, you're not taking off seventeen
Speaker 5: layers in winter, You're only really taking off a couple
Speaker 5: of layers. And if your child goes to daycare, talk
Speaker 5: to your educators about what they do. I know, something
Speaker 5: that we do often is when we're changing their nappies,
Speaker 5: even if you know, maybe they're getting towards that age.
Speaker 5: When we take the nappies off, we just sit them
Speaker 5: on the toilet and if nothing happens then that's fine.
Speaker 5: But there's no fear associated with the toilets. And I
Speaker 5: think daycare as well. One great thing is that they've
Speaker 5: got those little tiny toilets, so they're not these big
Speaker 5: scary things where you know, you look at their little
Speaker 5: bottoms and they might fall in, you know, so it's
Speaker 5: a little bit easier on those small little toilets. I
Speaker 5: know some parent rooms as well have them. It is
Speaker 5: great that we listen to our community as parents, but
Speaker 5: I think it's also you've got to take it with
Speaker 5: a grain of salt. You want to make sure that
Speaker 5: you get it right for your child. And I think
Speaker 5: it's really hard not to listen to families and oh, yes,
Speaker 5: we did it this way, and then we did it
Speaker 5: this way, and it does it gets so confusing. You're like,
Speaker 5: what the hell am I supposed to do? I think
Speaker 5: it is a little bit of trial and error. I
Speaker 5: think is the biggest thing is trying a few different things.
Speaker 5: I think a great way for preparing for that process is,
Speaker 5: you know, just getting some books about toilet training and
Speaker 5: about your body. I know Camart's got some great ones
Speaker 5: around toileting for boys and toileting for girls, because that's
Speaker 5: a whole now they can fish, I suppose.
Speaker 3: Oh the duties they make it go everywhere. I'm like,
Speaker 3: when Lenny sits on the potty, I'm like, bub, bub,
Speaker 3: don't sit on it.
Speaker 1: Tuck it down, Tuck it down.
Speaker 5: We say that a lot. Yeah, absolutely, Okay, into the toilet,
Speaker 5: pant it into the toilet. But then also for males,
Speaker 5: I suppose, you know, sometimes it is easier to do
Speaker 5: stand up wheez initially as well, or to squat over
Speaker 5: the potty. It's really different for every child, and I
Speaker 5: think starting that process of having those conversations and role modeling.
Speaker 5: I suppose, oh, I feel like I need to go
Speaker 5: to the bathroom, and you're saying that to your child
Speaker 5: before you go. You know, I'm just going to the bathroom,
Speaker 5: and you know they probably don't care, but you're role
Speaker 5: modeling that and they might say I'm going to the bathroom,
Speaker 5: or I need to go to the bathroom. And some
Speaker 5: families have key phrases that they use. It might be
Speaker 5: my body's telling me to go to the toilet, and
Speaker 5: then the educators of the daycare will say that, or
Speaker 5: whatever the case may be. So maybe you nail down
Speaker 5: a couple of key phrases, and you know, you read
Speaker 5: your books at nighttime before you go to bed. But
Speaker 5: trial and error process is the best.
Speaker 1: Must be nice.
Speaker 3: If someone has a kid that doesn't care if they
Speaker 3: go to the bathroom or not, mine acts like he's
Speaker 3: being tortured. If I have the audacity to leave him
Speaker 3: to go to the toilet, or he will come with
Speaker 3: me and bring himself some snacks so he can really
Speaker 3: settle in.
Speaker 5: It's a real show.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, I can't go near him if he's doing his business.
Speaker 3: He wants complete privacy. So, Sarah, are there some kids
Speaker 3: that just don't get it and struggle a lot more?
Speaker 5: Absolutely, it's definitely something that some kids really show with
Speaker 5: and that might be a sign that they're not quite
Speaker 5: ready and you might give it another three months for
Speaker 5: you to do that as well. They just quite haven't
Speaker 5: worked it out. I know in particular, wheeze are easier,
Speaker 5: but pooh is a totally different process. So they'll do
Speaker 5: wheeze on the potty like that, but getting them to
Speaker 5: you know, go into a pooh on the potty is
Speaker 5: a totally different process. Like I know, there's a lot
Speaker 5: of children that you know, they feel more comfortable doing
Speaker 5: that in a nappy, and so that can be a
Speaker 5: hard process too, is making that transition from going to
Speaker 5: the toilet and a nappy versus a toilet. A great
Speaker 5: tip that I like to think about in that situation
Speaker 5: is I like to put a pair of undies on
Speaker 5: and then a nappy over the top, so they're still
Speaker 5: feeling that wetness, but it's kind of containing it, I
Speaker 5: suppose as well, particularly like you're in the car or
Speaker 5: something like that, they're still feeling that wetness, but they
Speaker 5: have that comfort of a nappy as well. So that's
Speaker 5: always a nice trick.
Speaker 1: That's a good.
Speaker 5: Yeah, absolutely, and it's so easy. I think. You know,
Speaker 5: you're buying a lot of undies anyway, when you're starting
Speaker 5: toilet training. You go to kmart and you buy the
Speaker 5: twenty pack, and there's going to be some sacrifices, like
Speaker 5: ten out of those twenty undies they're not making at home.
Speaker 5: So you're going through those things anyway, and so you know,
Speaker 5: another sign that maybe they're not ready is that they're
Speaker 5: going through a lot of pairs of clothes, you know,
Speaker 5: ten or more maybe that day, and so you would
Speaker 5: maybe reconsider that, but ask them as well. If they're
Speaker 5: of the age where you can ask them, you know,
Speaker 5: do you need to go to the toilet and they're
Speaker 5: not interested, then hey, we're not going to push it.
Speaker 5: You know. You just want them to listen to their
Speaker 5: bodies and follow the cues.
Speaker 3: Really, so I was just like giggling to myself about
Speaker 3: the undies because I was thinking, like, it's really not
Speaker 3: the time where we need to be worrying too much
Speaker 3: about our impact on the environment, because no one needs
Speaker 3: to be scraping fecal matter off abricks.
Speaker 5: It's not No, it's not pleasant, definitely not. It's messy.
Speaker 5: It's messy.
Speaker 1: So you mentioned the Kmart books and the different phrases
Speaker 1: that families can kind of use in order to get that,
Speaker 1: I guess repetition and the kids to identify when to
Speaker 1: use the bathroom. Are there any other resources that you
Speaker 1: recommend to your parents.
Speaker 5: I definitely think there's a lot of videos that talk
Speaker 5: about it as well. A lot of kids, you know,
Speaker 5: will be spending time watching things on YouTube. There's a
Speaker 5: lot of great videos that are appropriate within the internet.
Speaker 5: I think you know, obviously watch them before you you know,
Speaker 5: let your child watch them. But around toileting, I.
Speaker 1: Think there's a wiggles one see it all the time.
Speaker 5: You'll work out what your child likes. Like There's some
Speaker 5: children are really into books, they love books, and so
Speaker 5: that's going to work for them. There will be some
Speaker 5: children that really like songs, and so you know, some
Speaker 5: families have a toilet song and that's the song that
Speaker 5: they sing when they're going to the toilet, because that's
Speaker 5: their child's a little bit more musically inclined, I suppose.
Speaker 5: So I definitely think songs and books, anything that is
Speaker 5: going to get them involved in that process, like, hey,
Speaker 5: we're doing this new thing. Like maybe you go with
Speaker 5: them and they come with you to pick their undies
Speaker 5: that they want to wear when they're toilet training, I
Speaker 5: think is a big one, and things like you know,
Speaker 5: maybe it's Elsa or maybe it's Poor Patrol or Spider Man,
Speaker 5: and they want to wear those things, I think, and
Speaker 5: you talk to them about that through that process, and
Speaker 5: you know, it's like a big celebration. Oh it means
Speaker 5: you're a big girl or a big boy now because
Speaker 5: you're going to be toilet training. So that might not
Speaker 5: work for every child. You know, that might be too
Speaker 5: much pressure on that particular child. So really, just again,
Speaker 5: you know your child best. I think you listen to
Speaker 5: your child and what works.
Speaker 1: It's just so comforting hearing like someone who's been through
Speaker 1: that experience that all works in that environment. Though, because
Speaker 1: I have been.
Speaker 2: Singing to rue party, party, party, party, party, party, thinking
Speaker 2: I'm an absolute lunatic, but You've just made me feel
Speaker 2: like an absolute genius because she loves singing, she loves dancing,
Speaker 2: and she gets so stoked when we're singing and dancing
Speaker 2: on the party.
Speaker 1: So it's just so funny, isn't it, Like exactly what
Speaker 1: you said. You know your kids, you're the expert on
Speaker 1: your kids, Like, we do know how to do this.
Speaker 1: I think it's just hearing someone else be like, you're
Speaker 1: doing it. That's right for your kid, Like all of
Speaker 1: the things are there. It's just that encouragement from someone
Speaker 1: that's like, yeah, duh, do it.
Speaker 5: Absolutely, doing it absolutely. And I think consistency is key.
Speaker 5: You know, you chat with the daycare teachers about this
Speaker 5: is what we do at home. Hey, let me show
Speaker 5: you our potty song that we see and she will
Speaker 5: do that at daycare. And it's that consistency because that's
Speaker 5: what you guys do at home, so you'll do that
Speaker 5: at daycare as well, and so everyone's going to be
Speaker 5: singing the potty song, you know, and that might help
Speaker 5: another child because that's what they like to do as well.
Speaker 5: So keeping it consistent, I think is really helpful. Or
Speaker 5: you tell grandma or you tell the babysitter everyone's on
Speaker 5: the same page as to what that looks like.
Speaker 1: So helpful.
Speaker 3: You've made me feel like not a terrible parent for
Speaker 3: like just sort of chilling about this my pleasure.
Speaker 5: Thanks for having me on well, big.
Speaker 1: Thing ks to Sarah. I'm feeling a lot better about
Speaker 1: that now.
Speaker 3: Kelly you yes, yes, and also really enjoyed the chat.
Speaker 1: I will say, yeah, I knew you would. If you'd
Speaker 1: let me do it sooner, you could have had a
Speaker 1: lot of fun sooners all I'm saying, well, you know.
Speaker 3: On that note, thank you so much for listening to
Speaker 3: us today. I hope that we've helped you in anyone
Speaker 3: or we've at least given you a little bit of
Speaker 3: a giggle. We are only two epps into the new season,
Speaker 3: but we would love to get your feedback on the
Speaker 3: jazzy new format. Chat to us in the Facebook group
Speaker 3: or hit us up on Insta.
Speaker 1: We will pop our handles in the show notes. Yes
Speaker 1: we were. This episode was produced by myself and Kelly,
Speaker 1: with audio production by Madeline Joanna Bye.